THISDAY STYLE MAGAZINE 30TH MAY 2021

O F I E J O

SUNDAY, MAY 30, 2021

A W U A H

LT A E !

TH S L R A WNOT E D M ARN O T F S ER O B I R R E IR A H W T A

H

...NOT IN THISDAY STYLE? THEN YOU’RE NOT IN STYLE

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CONTENT Society BOMA RISES TO PRESTIGOUS SAN

TRENDING ON ARISEPLAY

PG 6-7

POWER OF PERSEVERANCE

10TH YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF SKKY PG 8

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try and try again… just as Manchester City, who are in the 66th UEFA Cup final for the first time will face Chelsea who are looking to lift their third showpiece having lifted the trophy once in 2012 and indeed all of the sports people preparing to compete in the upcoming Olympics, winning is about perseverance. The movies this week celebrate the success that come from positive perseverance – from classics to biopics.

ASHLUXURY LAUNCHES IT’S BRAND NEW EXQUISITE RETAIL SPACE

PG 9

Fashion TYE AND DY SET IS NAILING IT! PG 10 • CAPSULES • COLOURS OF LIFE PG 11 HAPPY CHILDRENS DAY CELEBRATION PG 17-19 STYLISH WAYS TO WEAR RED PG 20-21 Once Hauwa Ojeifo decided to share her personal journey with mental health issues and sexual violence, there was no going back regardless of the stigma society associated with the topic.

In this interview with KONYE CHELSEA NWABOGOR, she speaks on why she’s dedicated her life to helping others, what she wants women to know about mental health, and how you can help fight the stigma associated with it.

4 RULES TO PREVENT HAIR DEHYDRATION PG 22

BIOGRAPHY; DRAMA; SPORT;

BAD AS I WANNA BE BIOGRAPHY; DRAMA; SPORT;

ADVENTURE; THRILLER;

THISDAY STYLE FASHION DIRECTOR/EXECUTIVE EDITOR RUTH OSIME

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EDITOR PRINT OLUFUNKE BABS-KUFEJI EDITOR DIGITAL KONYE NWABOGOR

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SENIOR ART DESIGNER MATHIAS ARCHIBONG 07054965500 CONTRIBUTORS ISIOMA USIADE GUEST CORRESPONDENTS AZUKA OGUJIUBA ZINA ANUMUDU JOANNA MACGREGOR SEYI ALAWODE PHOTOGRAPHER TY BELLO DIRECTOR, PRINT PRODUCTION CHUKS ONWUDINJO 08077092196

One thing we Nigerians shy away from are things that leave us befuddled and ashamed or is a stigma. So instead of facing the issue head on, we sweep it under the carpet hoping it will just ‘disappear’. If at all it is discussed, it’s in hushed tones so it does not get out. Many a time, issues like mental health are greatly misunderstood and downplayed lest so as not to bring unwarranted attention to the person or their families. It’s even worse when the affected person has everything seemingly okay in their lives otherwise. For a people that rely heavily on public imagery, this ailment is ‘frowned upon’ and digging deep to the root of the cause is not something most families choose to embrace because they are ashamed of it. They are left frustrated at what they perceive as ‘indulgence’ from the victim simply because it is not a physical ailment.

Depression and anxiety are not feelings to be brushed off anymore as mental health is slowly and surely taking its reign in our society. And if not well and throughly addressed can lead to increased suicidal rates. Many mental health sufferers are usually triggered by something that happened to them in the past or sometimes societal pressure and other issues that dig deep into the fiber on their existence.

Our cover personality, HAUWA OJEIFO, has experienced mental health issues and taken on the baton to create more awareness on this ailment. She has lent her voice to many programs and received several awards for her crusade. She has broken the shackles of tradition and continues to advocate for better laws to support the treatment and acknowledgment of this dire issue. She is a living testimony that the disease is not a thing of shame and she is doing everything within her power to erase the undeserving stigma associated with mental health. This is an issue that is becoming more prevalent in our society and as such, should be handled with the urgency it deserves. We hope her story would inspire others like her and make them reach out more to professional bodies who are best trained to handle their issues.

Life in Nigeria is touch enough as it is which is why we should always take time out to look out for each other and give as much support as we can to those who need it more than we do.

Instagram: @thisdaystyle | Twitter: @thisdaystyleon | Instagram: @thisdaystyle | Website: www.thisdaystyle.ng

BIOGRAPHY; DRAMA; SPORT;

BIOGRAPHY; CRIME; DRAMA;

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DEMEJI EDWARDS FEMI LIJADU

MARTINA & REX AND NIJHOFF ADESUWA GIWA-OSAGIE

BIYI & SOLA FUNKE ADEKOYA

DAVID RAYNER & TED COVENTRY JULIAN HARDY & STANLEY EVANS

NIYI ADEBAYO IFE ALAKIJA ADEGBOLA & ADENIKE OGUNLESI

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BOMA ALABI RISES TO PRESTIGIOUS SAN To celebrate Boma Ayomide Alabi’s elevation to the rank of Senior Advocate of Nigeria, an intimate dinner at Arabesque, Lagos was recently organised by her close friends, a group of female senior lawyers. Boma, a former president of the Commonwealth Lawyers Association, is also a recipient of the national honour of the Officer of the Order of the Niger, OON. Like with every career, rising to the top is the ultimate goal and if you are fortunate enough to attain this goal, the position comes with responsibilities and well earned prestige.

So it is with great joy family and friends all turned up to celebrate this milestone with the recipient. It was an evening of fun, gaiety and laughter.

BOMA ALABI

PHOTO CREDIT – KUNLE OGUNFUYI

BOMA ALABI

FUNKE ABOYADE GOV CHIBUIKE ROTIMI AMAECH

GOV BABATUNDE RAJI FASHOLA

SYLVA OGWEMOH & FABIAN AJOGWU

EMEKA & OLA IFEZULIKE

OYINKAN BADEJOOKUSANYA

REMI BABALOLA

TOSIN RUNSEWE

TOKI MABOGUNJE.

WOLE SEBIOBA

EBUN ADENIYI

SOLIAT BADA & MICHAEL ABEGUNDE PEJU LAYIWOLA

PRETTY BOY MIKE

DJ MERCEDES

LAI FATONA GBEMIGA DELANO

LOLA IFATUROTI

DANJUMA SALEH

SOFIA WEN, AINA AKINTONDE & PAT FANIRAN

ADEBOLA WILLIAMS ASUE IGHODALO

DANIEL OBASI

MICHELLE DEDE

SOLA ADEEYO

TOLU OJO

FEMI SOJIRIN

VICTOR OKORONKWO

BAYO ORANGE CULTURE

DJ SEVEN

VANNESSA AMADI

DENOLA GREY

ABDULRASAQ ISA

ASHLUXURY LAUNCHES IT’S BRAND NEW EXQUISITE RETAIL SPACE.

10TH YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF SKKY Recently, SKKY Dental Services, celebrated its 10th year anniversary. The event took place at the office grounds located in the heart of Ikoyi which welcomed some of their esteemed stakeholders over the years to an elegant cocktail party. Some of the attendees included the Honourable Commissioner for Health, Lagos state Prof. Akinola Abayomi, who gave the keynote speech, Mr John Aboh, Chairman of the Board of Ecobank who is also Chairman of SKKY Dental Services, Michelle Dede, a prominent Nollywood actress and Dr Seinde Akinsete who all gave goodwill messages.

Dr Oluyemisi Fadahunsi, Managing Dentist of SKKY Dental Services, thanked the everyone for making the effort to attend in spite of the heavy downpour.

Guests were entertained with good food and music .

BOBO AJUDUA

SEYE FADAHUNSI , OLAWALE EDUN, YEMISI FADAHUNSI, AKIN ABAYOMI, SEINDE AKINSETE & JOHN ABOH

Recently Ashluxury launched it’s brand new exquisite retail space with an exciting group of VIP guests and select press in attendance. The two story 1,500 square-foot space is located in Admiralty Way, Lekki Phase 1 and is curated by its founder and owner Yinka Ash. Ashluxury proved why it is indeed the number one destination spot for high-end designer wears in Lagos.

The store stocks highly sought-after items from designer fashion houses including Christian Dior, Gucci, Fendi, Versace, Balenciaga and many many more. VIP guests in attendance at the launch included Afrobeats superstars Davido, Burna Boy, Naira Marley, actor Denola Grey, international publicist and music manager Vannessa Amadi-Ogbonna, Adebola Williams, Soliat Bada, Bayo Oke, stylist Daniel Obasi and Pretty Boy Mike to name just a few.

The Ash Luxury store intends to be a promising shopping destination with full recognition both at home and abroad.

In addition, Ash luxury is home to the popular streetwear line ASHLUXE. Founded by Creative Director Yinka Ash, ASHLUXE is designed to re-imagine street style specifically with the enlightened millennial in mind. ASHLUXE is at the forefront of street wear in Africa and is built on a reputation for innovation, quality and youthful aesthetics.

YINKA ASH

BURNA BOY

DAVIDO

NAIRA MARLEY

TIE &SET DYE

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

IS NAILING IT!

Make way for the matchy-matchy trend as co-ordinates are the quickest way to get quirky these post lock down days.

BY FUNKE BABS-KUFEJI

Easy to wear It works for so many looks and occasions, and it’s on trend in more ways than one. First of all, it’s a co-ord set, second of all, it’s tie-dye and most of all it is so damn easy to wear.

Not only that, they are versatile enough to dress up or down and better still, can be worn separately so if you think about it, you can get three different looks for the price of one set. So grab a pair and have fun with your mixes!

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THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

Alero Adollo aleroadollo@yahoo.com

STYLE & DESIGN

CAPSULES

BY FUNKE BABS-KUFEJI

The world has many strange people doing strange things in the name of strange concepts. The brouhaha this sometimes drags in is unrivalled because oftentimes even confusion is confused.

Let’s yarn a bit about man/woman relationships, now why do we just faff around with people’s emotions as if we are playing ludo, why are we so insensitive and selfish that we do not take the other person’s feelings into consideration when making our choices especially when it concerns them. We chant daily that no man is an island and when we are then given a privileged position in the lives of others, we mess it up. When a man meets a woman and knows that he just wants to “play” with her, does it not make sense for him to put his cards on the table and make sure they are on the same page, instead of waxing lyrical and yarning dust. I tell you, these are the issues that lead many to Armageddon, it is not possible that you break a tender heart into several pieces and not end up with life devouring issues, karma spares no one. Do you lot know that a heart break for many is like physical death, they just never recover, every life decision is now made on the altar of this one failed relationship and others suffer for the pain they carry because hurt people, hurt people.

I know many people who are taken for granted by their spouses and they treat them like last year’s dirty rag, it is very very hurtful, and others that are like furniture, decorating their homes without use, they drift through each day purposeless because they have been made to believe they are worthless.

Las giddy is the worst place ever because even healthy relationships come here to commit suicide, from the temptation of beauty to the temptation of lucre, to the temptation of fame.... a few pursue a bohemian life in the name of individuality whilst others tie themselves with chains to religion sharing their mean spirit around like communion bread, what is worthy of note is the misery that has become a live in lover to them all, the raw hurt that oozes rivers of pain.

Another question that continually begs for an answer is the reason why people cling to partners who daily feed them with agony by tormenting their emotions. Why do people cling to their jailer like he is the best thing since sliced bread. The consequences of inertia in a situation where one should have seized back her life is unending, from raising children who we maim, to emptying ourselves of positive energy, the list is endless.

We were born to bloom and grow not to wither and die, we were called forth to complete each other not compete with each other, we were thrown together to partner and multiply not dominate and stunt. We need to learn to empty ourselves into our spouses and then refill at the feet of the Master. We cannot do this life thing without God, trust me when I tell you that his is the only light that can pierce our darkness.

The debauchery out there churns the stomach walahi, the impunity and the rakishness is best described as preposterous, when reason takes a permanent vacation, everything and anything goes.

We need to pause to ponder, we have lost the plot, whatever happened to love and fidelity, courtship and romance, whatever happened to the merging of souls in the name of deep affection? We may need to go back to the drawing board and rejig a few derelict blocks which we used to build our lives, just maybe it is still possible to repair what we spent a lifetime misusing. I don’t think it’s too late to create the life we want, we must not accept just anything, we must aim for the stars. We are that important and our journey is worthy of a permanent glow. It’s not cool to be down in the dump 80% of our lives, exist and breeze through when we have a choice.

Seize the day, define your reality and live it, anyone who cannot fit into your soar and your happy needs to be shown the door, life is difficult enough, you do not then add sleeping with the enemy to the mix. Do you pilgrim.

Colours of Life with Koko Kalango

Jesus in Deuteronomy We are running a series that shows us the relevance of Jesus to each book of the bible. I hope you are enjoying the write ups as much as I am. Today, we take a look at the book of Deuteronomy, with my daughter….

Deuteronomy marks the end of the Torah, the collective name for the first 5 books of the Bible, meaning ‘instruction’ or ‘law’.

Moses’ death is recorded at the close of this book and it definitely feels like the end of an era. After all, Moses has been the central figure since his birth in Exodus.

The entire book is quite emotional. It covers a climatic point in Israel’s history when they are just about to enter into the Promised Land. Of course, they are 40 years later than they should be (now that is a story for another day).

Moses was given the task of instructing the Israelites in God’s ways. He knows he is about to die, so he gives a recap of: who God is what God has done what God wants His people to do in return how the previous generation of Israelites responded, and finally what the new generation should do, going forward There is also a lot of prophecy in this book; Moses speaks in great detail of the future of the nation. It is amazing! I find prophetic passages to be great proof/confirmation of the divinity of the Bible and the existence of God. The greatest prophecy Moses gives is one of Jesus: “The LORD your God will raise up for you a prophet like me from among your own brothers. You must listen to Him.” – Deuteronomy 18:15 The Bible actually says – not that Moses is like Jesus, but – Jesus is like Moses. What an honour for Moses! And one I’d say is rightfully earned. There truly was no prophet like him (until Jesus of course). He alone kept about 2 million insubordinate ex-slaves in check for 40 years.

He was the instrument of God’s power against the Egyptians. He basically ensured the survival of the race that would change the world.

Jesus did none of those things, so in what ways exactly is He the

prophet who is like Moses?

Well..

MOSES

JESUS

•Was nearly killed when Pharaoh ordered the murder of all male Hebrew new-borns (Exodus 1:22)

• Was nearly killed when Herod ordered the murder of all babies in Bethlehem under 2 (Matthew 2:16)

•Led the Israelites out of captivity in Egypt (Exodus 3:10)

•Leads humankind out of the captivity of sin into God’s freedom (John 8:31-36; Romans 6:16-18)

• Spoke face to face with God (Numbers 12:8)

• Saw God face to face (John 6:46)

• Gave the Israelites God’s old law from Mount Sinai (Exodus 19-24; the whole Torah basically)

• Gave humankind God’s new law from an unnamed mountain (Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5-7; all the Gospels)

• Interceded for the Israelites, even when their wrong was against him (Exodus 32:9-14; Numbers 21:6)

• Intercedes for humankind, even the ones who hate Him (Romans 8:34; Luke 23:34)

• Was a priest as well as a prophet (Psalm 99:6)

• Is a priest as well as a prophet (Hebrews 4:14)

• Built (and is still building) the • Built the tabernacle, God’s old dwelling amongst humans Church, God’s new dwelling amongst humans (Matthew (Exodus 25-31, 35-40) 16:18; 1 Corinthians 6:19)

You may wonder what relevance the fact that Jesus is a prophet like Moses has to our life?

After Moses says the people must listen to that prophet who will come, Yahweh goes on to say something quite serious: anyone who does not listen to the prophet will be held accountable to God. Later, in the book of Acts, Peter says that everyone who does not listen to the prophet will be destroyed.

The importance of recognizing Jesus as the prophet like Moses is realising that Jesus is not only like Moses but is greater than.

Our salvation depends entirely on Him. Whereas the Law of Moses only spelt out our rewards and punishments for this life, the ‘law’ of Christ spells them out for the next. The repercussions to the Israelites (and to us) for failing to obey Jesus would be much more than the repercussions for failing to obey Moses.

Now, God isn’t trying to catch people out with eternal damnation. Rather, He is looking

to save us. He has laid the terms out plainly. He has spelt out the consequences of our choice. The decision is now yours: will you choose life or death?

“This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses.

Now choose life…” Deuteronomy 30:19 Tarari Kalango COLOURS OF LIFE SHOW Our Colours of Life shows now airs on DOVE TV, DSTV channel 349, every Saturday at 3pm.

This week I would be talking to Nneka Anyachaebelu, who runs the Family Word Centre, about Parenting in the 21st Century.

You must not miss this topical conversation. You can watch all episodes on you tube (Colours of Life TV).

Reach us – contact@coloursoflife. org Our daily devotional is available on instagram @ coloursoflifeministry

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THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

COVER

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

Once Hauwa Ojeifo decided to share her personal journey with mental health issues and sexual violence, there was no going back regardless of the stigma society associated with the topic . The response she received was overwhelmingly supportive and empathetic a sign that this conversation needed to be had. She realised she wasn’t alone in the emotional turmoil she had experienced for so long, and decided to create a safe space where others could receive the same support she did from sharing her story. This is how She Writes Woman was born.

Five years on and Hauwa’s efforts is slowly but surely paying off . She has become known for her struggles to give a voice to those suffering from mental health issues and ending the stigma surrounding it . A fight which has earned her several awards and recognitions including the prestigious Queen’s Young Leaders award 2018 by the Royal Commonwealth Society, Cambridge University and the Queen Elizabeth Diamond Jubilee Trust. She was selected as a One Young World Ambassador and AstraZeneca Young Health Programme scholar amongst others .

In February of 2020, she became the first person with a mental health condition to testify in that capacity before the Nigerian National Assembly on the rights of persons with mental health conditions and psychosocial disabilities under the tenets of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. Her testimony ensured that the bill affecting about 40 to 60 million Nigerians was stepped down for reconsideration.

While there’s still a great deal of misunderstanding and confusion about mental health , people are finally beginning to accept that it exists and should be taken seriously.

In this interview with KONYE CHELSEA NWABOGOR, she speaks on why she’s dedicated her life to helping others, what she wants women to know about mental health, and how you can help fight the stigma around mental health issues.

Here in Nigeria, there’s a lot of stigma surrounding mental health and sexual violence and so one would imagine it wasn’t easy coming out to use your personal experience to support others. Is this act therapeutic for you?

It was more out of being tired of living my life chocked in silence and wanting to be free of it and for me, talking publicly about my mental health and sexual violence experience was indeed some sort of coping mechanism.

It was initially very therapeutic because it felt like the more I talked about it the lighter I felt.

Funny enough when I first started my crusade on mental health and sexual abuse, I did not own my story and instead told it in a third person narrative. But over time, I became more comfortable and put my name to it. I began to live my own truth and stopped being everything I was expected to be. I started to become what I truly wanted to be.

A W U A H

O F I E J O

H. T L A E L H A T N ME R O F IOR R R A A W

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So what’s your story? And what has the journey to healing been like?

From a very early age, I was a different type of child but I think in my adolescent and teenage years, there was a shift in my behavior. I used to be this child that had a very loud laughter and I was very expressive, outgoing and playful but then something happened and all of a sudden I became this child that was very different. I barely talked, my laughter became low and I wasn’t social. It continued that way and progressed into what people call mood swings. My family and friends will say ‘she has terrible mood swings’.

I started having multiple gender-based violence experiences and multiple sexual-violence experiences and then perhaps, the biggest trigger was when I was raped in my adulthood. That just crystallized everything which triggered all the trauma as my body and mind couldn’t hold it anymore.

For everything I had gone through and kept in silence, I felt shame, guilt and blame. That was when my mental health journey began. That was the first time I ever had to deal with what was going on in my mind, how I was feeling and how it was affecting my behavior.

At some point it got worse so I started speaking out, looking out on social media, doing a lot of googling and reading because I knew there was something wrong.

I managed to get in contact with a psychiatrist at Yaba and I recall having private sessions with a psychologist and it was interesting. I was doing all of this in secret. I didn’t tell any of my family or friends because this was a journey that I needed at that point in time to think on my own. I needed to understand everything. It was a condition where people ask you what is wrong, and you don’t know how to explain it.

Funny enough when I first started my crusade on mental health and sexual abuse, I did not own my story and instead told it in a third person narrative. But over time, I became more comfortable and put my name to it. I began to live my own truth and stopped being everything I was expected to be.

I started to become what I truly wanted to be.

I spent a couple of sessions with the psychologist, and I paid myself. Uber wasn’t a thing then so I had to use regular taxi. It was really tough and then I became broke doing it because of course, we all know how health care is expensive particularly in Nigeria. I felt I had gotten enough to at least give me a perfect tail so I could stand on my heels, but I remember my psychologist telling me that at some point, I really have to bring my parents because he could see that there was a lot of trigger within my family and also understanding that family is part of healing as well. It just wasn’t something I was ready for because I knew the kind of family I came from and I knew this wasn’t going to be easy for me, so I just stopped the sessions.

After that, I had a breakdown in February 2016, my diagnosis with my psychologist told me it was bipolar disorder and post traumatic disorder, so it was a closure finally that I could put a finger on what I was going through.

Two months down the line after seeing him, I had a breakdown again where I had my first suicidal attempt and that was the point where I knew there was no way I could go on this journey alone. My sister witnessed it as she was at the place where it happened and that’s when I had to bring my parents and family into it to know what I was going through and where I was at the moment. I told them about my sexual violence story and they were very instrumental in giving me that bit of support with regards to my sexual violence and making my family understand it wasn’t my fault and I didn’t

bring it on myself. At this point in time, I had to bring in a psychiatrist to get the support I needed, I started taking medication and I am still on antidepressant medication at the moment.

It’s been quite a journey to healing but I think what is most important about my healing for me, is more than anything, the awareness. Awareness of what you have, what goes on inside of you, your thoughts, your feelings, your emotions, your behavior and how it is affecting other people.

That has really influenced how I have gone through my healing because healing isn’t just about seeing a professional or taking my medication, it is about understanding my entire life, experiences no matter how little, what choices, what was done to me at different points in my life knowingly and unknowingly that set me up in this path and having to undo some of these things, interrogate and address and perhaps come to terms with some of these experiences.

At a time when mental illness is still somewhat a taboo topic, was there anyone trying to silence you when you decided to speak out ?

Yes, they are people who didn’t want me to tell my story. I wanted to tell my story for me and the way I wanted to; zero edits, and that had consequences on people like my family.

Sometimes, not that people mean it the wrong way when they insist you be private about your mental health conditions, but they know the kind of society we live in and their intention is to protect you. I heard a lot of things like ‘you are erring your dirty laundry in public’ to ‘no man would want to marry somebody like you’ to ‘ you have to understand that you are a Muslim woman’.

But I was very committed to the fact that I wanted to live life on my terms. That for me was my biggest healing, and so I continued to speak out.

What prompted the decision to help others?

I started She Writes Woman on April 17, 2016, my birthday. I realized that actually dropping those hints in third person encouraged people to reach out and talk. I would get dms from people who wouldn’t want to like the posts because they wouldn’t want other people to know they engaged in such contexts. People would also send me emails telling me that what I posted is literally their story, and that made me realize that it seemed like though everybody was waiting for one person to be the one to talk. That was the spark for me. It was really about the fact that I had a story and quite frankly it wasn’t that unique.

They are a lot of people who are living in shame, fear and doubt and who have been silenced from telling

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their story. I also realized that people wanted to talk and that’s when we started the help line in July 2016. It was free and it operated 24/7. It still does.

At the time, I handled it myself. I would get calls at night and spend hours on the phone talking to people.

They just wanted to be listened to and they wanted to know their stories were valid and their opinions mattered and that gave me purpose. From there I realized that people just wanted to connect to people like them .

As a mental health advocate, what is the most common thing you hear most from people living with mental health conditions?

What I hear the most is that people need understanding. It is not like people call to say I need to be understood but from talking to people for the past five years, I can see that people want their stories heard.

They want to know that their stories matter, and they also want to know it is not their fault that they are living with mental health conditions. Those are the things that I hear.

Why do you think there is a stigma associated with these conditions?

For me, it is a lack of understanding. I usually say it in two ways; unawareness and under awareness.

Unawareness in the fact that a vast majority of Nigerians do not understand mental health, because of our culture, religion and societal norms that have been passed on from generation to generation. Then the other group of people who think they know about mental health are the ones under under-awareness.

There is so much bias around mental health; how we talk about it, the language we use, the context we think about it and subconscious reactions. These actions tell us that even when we think we know; we really don’t know as much as we do. Those are the bottom lines of stigmas. Unawareness is ignorance driven while underawareness is an incomplete story, the story that takes individual truth and turns it into something that is not true and leads to misinformation and undue fear.

What role can culture play in this stigma?

The thing about culture is, a lot of times when we talk about culture, we make it seem like it is static. It is a sum total of our way of life, what we consider to be normal, how we address things, eat, dress etc. What we see as culture today in 2021 wasn’t necessarily culture in 1981 so it has changed and adjusted. What I think is happening with the role that culture plays is that we are holding on to elements of culture that no longer work with the new information that we have received today.

Taking information that you have received in the last 5/10 years but holding on to culture of 50/30 years is a total mismatch. If the way of life does not actually fit the people that it is made for, then it has to change.

The culture has to change, and the change starts from when we are presented with new information.

Tell me about She Writes Woman. Whay impact have you had with this platform?

She Writes Woman is a non-profit movement that gives mental health a voice in Nigeria by empowering people who actually live with mental health conditions to tell their own stories and advocate for their rights.

We have done this over the last five years across three core areas; first is how we plug in systemic gaps for people to receive mental health care and support. We have a 24/7 talk free mental help line(0800800200), we have free and unlimited tele-therapy that people can access(tellng.com/therapySWW) and we also have a virtual community called Safe Place Nigeria as well.

There is so much that needs to be done really. From the Federal Ministry of Health to World Health Organization, the estimate shows that about 40% of Nigerians putting the numbers to between 40million to 50million Nigerians, live with one form of mental health condition or the other. I am not talking about the mad people on the streets, rather, the everyday people like you and I

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THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

Celebrating Little Ones On

Children's Day

They are a lot of people who are living in shame, fear and doubt and who have been silenced from telling their story.

I also realized that people wanted to talk and that’s when we started the help line in July 2016. It was free and it operated 24/7. It still does.

that live with mental health conditions.

The secondary thing we do is legislative and policy advocacy which is really about ensuring that Nigerians international commitment are realized locally. By doing so, that we are holding the Nigeria government accountable to ensuring that the right respect, dignity and liberty of persons like me with mental health conditions and psychosocial disabilities are upheld at every single level of government. So whether it is in the new mental health legislation of existing laws or more importantly, in our practices, traditional and state law activities, we are advocating accountability under the tenet of the United Nations convention on the rights of persons with disabilities which is ‘nothing about us without us’.

The third aspect of our work is what we call intersection solutions. This is where we try to make sure that mental health conversations or care are not limited to the health care places. It permits work places, schools, creative industries, etc all addressing mental health issues.

Our impact as an organization has been felt by about 60million Nigerians. Just last year I made a landmark appearance at the National Assembly at the public hearing of the mental health bill, as the first person with a mental health condition to testify in that capacity before them. That testimony was so strong and powerful and had never before been done in Nigeria’s history but still, that bill was stopped from passing. A bill that would have caused over 60million Nigerians their right to freedom, right to choose and consent regarding their mental health.

Qualitatively, we are changing how mental health is looked at in Nigeria from top to bottom, from policy to practice to procedures within families and broadly speaking as a nation. And of course for all of this work, we have received local and international recognition from being awarded by Her Majesty the Queen of England, to being a part of Obama foundation Africa, to being recognized by the Goal Keeper Global Gold Stone Miller and also the Innogra Microbeits Fellow by Human Rights. I have also had the opportunity to speak at the World Health Organization and United Nations united nation twice. These are just a few of the many milestone recognitions and honors that all our impacts have brought for us.

Are mental health issues avoidable? What do you believe is the best way to protect your mental space?

It is a yes and a no. Yes, in the sense that there are certain mental health issues that are avoidable because

. .a few days back

they are linked to adverse childhood experiences. There are also certain mental health issues that are a result of the way we have lived over a period of time and changing the way we live could reverse certain kinds of issues.

The best way for us to protect our mental health is to understand it, and know that mental health is not abstract. The thoughts and feelings you have affect your behavior, and how you show up to yourself and other people in different settings is your mental health.

So in understanding how to protect and preserve your mental health and your mental space, you have to understand how it works. You have to understand that when things are going on around you, within you, there are thoughts that fly through your mind and those thoughts trigger certain kind of emotions. When you sustain those thoughts or emotions over a long period of time, it begins to affect your mental health.

So, in order to protect our mental space, we must start by nuturing our thoughts. That is you protecting your mental space. There is no glory in being sleep deprived, no glory in over working, the world is shifting, people are more productive when they are mentally healthy.

These are the things to look out for.

What’s next for you and She Writes Woman ?

For us its really about shifting the system, we are focusing a lot on systemic change and one of the ways we are doing it is by building, training and empowering people who have mental health conditions. We are training people just like ourselves. We are calling out to as many that can come forward, we want to train them on what their rights are, to advocate their rights and to open the doors. For people to be able to walk into rooms within their states or community and have these conversations on what their rights are. To teach people how to hold their government accountable for fulfilling this rights. For us, that is a huge part for She Writes Woman and we will continue to scale up Safe Place Nigeria in order to see significant changes within mental health in Nigeria. We must address legislation and that for us is a core focus area.

What do you want women with mental health conditions to know?

Just like any other group of people, I want you to know that I hear you, I see you, your feelings are valid, your story matters, your experience matters. There are thousands of women just like you in your area who are calling on to each other. It is okay to reach out to receive the support you know you need.

CREDITS: Creative styling and planning @theunidenticalduo photography @poshclick | children’s outfit @ariandzee_kids | Hair styling @hairssencekids

On May 27th each year, we set aside a day to celebrate our future and our hope; our children. Children’s Day means different things to different people. For adults it is a reminder of our solemn duty to work tirelessly for the rights, education and welfare of Nigerian children, those who are out of school, those who are in Internally Displaced Camps and those who so often have to make do and go without. We don’t mark it this year in spite of the unusual times we face but because of them. It has never been more important to cherish all we hold dear and nothing can be dearer than our children. We see now more than ever how one generation’s legacy shapes the trajectory of another by creating or limiting their opportunities. It is through our collective effort that we can and we will bequeath to them the very best that we can muster.

For children the celebrations and commemorations are all about that essential component of childhood - lots of fun! The magic, wonder and possibility of childhood are infinite. They can and should last a lifetime. Here’s to lifelong curiosity, imagination, undiluted joy and laughter for all our little darlings. Some of Nigeria’s top child models and influencers wish the nation’s children a Happy Children’s Day. Read all about what the day means to each of our stars and what they got up to.

TUNDUN ABIOLA 17

STYLE & DESIGN

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

Elena Uyoyo Ugboma.

OLIVIA MORENIKE DARAMOLA. 6 year old twin fashion, TV commercial, runway, billboard and picture editorial model

What does children’s day mean to me?

Happy Children’s Day, everyone.

We are important and have purpose. Today I wil be going to my friends house on a play date. We are going to eat loads of candies and have fun.

8 year old award winning actor, model, kid host

What does children’s day mean to me?

It’s a day to celebrate children. What I like about children’s day is I get to go out, have fun and play a lot.

6 year old fashion, TV commercial, billboard and picture editorial model

OLIANA KIKELOMO DARAMOLA.

What does children’s day mean to me?

I get excited about children’s day because I get to go out on play dates, and also bond with my brother, sisters and sometimes friends.

I hope we can have children’s day everyday because daddy and mummy makes it super fun for us.

Blows kisses.

7 year old youtuber.

What does children’s day mean to me?

Children’s day is a day when you celebrate their future and as part of the celebration you can also buy them cakes. Don’t ask me why! It’s the first time I hearing about Children’s Day. I think it also means when you celebrate the day when you gave birth to that child that makes you feel like.. it just changes your life. You know what I mean?

Changing your life.. just changes your life.. so yeah that’s what I think children’s day means to me; not your family, not your grandma, not my mummy, not my daddy, not my brother, not my sister.. I don’t have a sister. What am I saying!?

Diana Egwuatu 7 year old youtuber.

SHAWN OLUWASEYI DARAMOLA. AMARIAH TINUOLA DARAMOLA 4 years old

What does children’s day mean to me?

Happy Children’s Day, everyone.

Today I am going to buy myself and all my friends new toys. I am going to have lots of candies, share some with my family and save some for my classmates and teachers.

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8 year old Fashion / Lifestyle Model

What does children’s day mean to me?

We children are the futures leaders of tommorow, we have purpose and deserve to be celebrated.

So today I am going to be celebrating children’s day out having pizza and ice cream with my family and friends and make the best of today because mummy’s says it comes once in a year even though we have other holidays but I think this one is special because its about children.

Hope you have an amazing day.

9 year old youtuber.

Sean Ameh.

What does children’s day mean to me?

Children’s Day is a day that I can celebrate childhood like I’m a child myself, a child of a God it’s a good thing that God gave Children’s Day to me. Children’s Day is a day God gave to me to celebrate and all children are important people in this world. Children day is like a yes day for us children. We can have fun, do anything we want, celebrate anything we want to do, do anything so Happy Children’s Day.

Eliana Ameh Temilayo Abodunrin

What does children’s day mean to me?

Children’s Day is a day you can have fun, celebrate, eat your favourite snacks and also it’s a free day for children. One thing I like about Children’s Day is I get to spend time with my family because I always ask my mum everyday can we have a family time so I decided on Children’s Day we wil celebrate together because Children’s Day is free like I said and you can also spend time with your parents even if they have work.

I wish you all a very happy children’s Day

11 years old Saxophonist

What does children’s day mean to me?

Children’s Day is a day that we have more fun as kids and we celebrate the special love that God has for us. Jesus said “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these”.

This shows that God cares about all of us and we have a day to ourselves to discover more about the things we are passionate about.

Being a special day, our parents should allow us have all the fun that we can.

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stylish ways to wearRED THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

BY USIADE ISIOMA

From runways to the streets, the red hue is spreading like wildfire. But, like any bold trend, creating the right look with red takes some knowledge and practice. So, before you go haphazardly throwing on every piece of ruby, crimson, and candy apple red clothing you own, read this. Whether it’s your favourite hue or your first time rocking the shade, we can show you how to wear red the right way and nail this hottest trend.

Red with Pink

Red can be an intense and dramatic hue, but it can also be chic and romantic. To rock this trend with a feminine and flirty aesthetic, try pairing your favourite red pieces with pink designs. The combination can be very complementary and can easily create a contemporary and fashionable look. Try rocking a pastel pink blazer and bright red pants for yourself, and you’ll agree with us too.

BRACKETT ELLIS

Red with Leather

While red undoubtedly goes great with denim, it can also partner perfectly with leather. The combination of the bright hue and tough fabric is an intense and edgy one. Red with leather makes an excellent option for occasions where you want to show off your attitude. While you can rock the pair during the day, it works especially well for evening events. All you need to do is dress it up a little. You can do so by choosing a chic red top, a black leather pant, and heeled lace-up sandals.

KIM OPARA

Red Patterns

Red with Denim

If you’re searching for a way to spice up your usual weekend denim look, you should consider injecting a red hue. By just adding a red item or two to your outfit, you can make your casual ensemble infinitely more stylish and trendier. All you need to do is select what item or which pieces you want to rock in the fiery hue and combine both into a winning look.

ARIYIIKE

Patterns can be a fun and playful way to rock the red trend. Although they can often seem more intense than block colours, patterns can actually subdue a vibrant red hue by breaking up the bright tone. Therefore, rocking a red patterned design is an excellent way to ease into this hottest trend. All you need to do is pick your favourite option. While florals are always a lovely choice, you should also consider checks, tartan, gingham, and stripes.

GRIL

Red Bottoms

Not quite ready to go red all over?

That’s not a problem. How about focusing on your legs instead? Opting for a pair of red pants or a red skirt can still create statement style without feeling over the top. To keep the look balanced, just remember to make your legs the focus of your outfit. As such, completing your look with basic colours and classic designs is an excellent option. Something as simple as red pants with a top, and slipper heels can look seriously chic.

REBECCA NENGI HAMPSON

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Red Long jacket

Red All Over

Extroverts and daring fashionistas will love rocking this red trend from head to toe. Although it may be a bold look, going red all over is completely on-trend and incredibly stylish. So, if there was ever a time to rock a pair of red pants with a red blazer, red top, and red shoes, it is now. While there are numerous ways that you can wear the look, consider opting for a bottom and top in matching shades. Then, mix your things up with your shoe and bag that is darker or patterned.

IDIA AISIEN

This chic outfit addition will instantly turn up the drama and style of your look for an impressive ensemble.

Whether you choose a trench coat, cape, blazer, or leather jacket, make it bold and eye-catching. Also, remember to keep the rest of your look minimal and subdued.

Your favourite skirt, a turtleneck top, and a pair of pointed heels will do the trick nicely.

VAL

Red Dress

The best thing about a bold colour like red is that it can turn any garment into a statement piece. As such, the hue is perfect for dresses and can make simple styles stand out, and unique designs really shine. So, whether you’re rocking a blazer dress or a shirt dress, you’re sure to look trendy and stylish.

SHARON OOJA

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4 Prevent

BEAUTY

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

STYLE & DESIGN

THISDAY Style Vol. 22, No. 9516 Sunday, May 30, 2021

RULES TO

Hair

Dehydration

BY USIADE ISIOMA

Hair dehydration is a problem that can’t be hidden under a hat. Unstable outdoor air, wind, dry indoor air, and improper care products dry out not only the skin but also the hair. Generally speaking, a person dehydrates when more fluid is removed from the body than it enters. Twothirds of our body is made up of water, which helps many of the body’s vital functions, including skin and hair. If the water level in the blood becomes too low, this results in an unbalanced amount of minerals, salts, and sugar in the body. Here are four rules you should pay attention to prevent your hair from dehydration.

only doesn’t help the hair, but also can change its natural structure. Use better products less, but keep them longer.

Use only natural products.

Proper nutrition is important for hair.

Hair, like skin or nails, is a living part of the body.

Bulbs grow under the skin, so to be healthy, you need to start caring not only about what shampoo you use, but also what you put into your body. In addition to adequate water intake, no less important are daily consumed foods, which are the main source of all the necessary nutrients for hair. Omega-3 fatty acids are found in fish like mackerel and salmon, walnuts and other nuts, flaxseed, avocados, and soybeans.

Don’t forget vitamins and minerals.

Like any other part of the body, vitamins are also essential for hair. Although their growth and moisture are often determined by factors such as human age, genetics, or hormones, the optimal amount of nutrients is no less important. Vitamins A, B, C, D and E are very important for hair, they all promote hair growth, help restore the right amount

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of moisture, and maintain a healthy condition.

Healthy hair needs minerals such as cobalt, copper, iodine, iron, zinc and silicon. In the absence of zinc, the scalp dries out and the hair begins to shed.

You can find zinc in wheat germ and bran, oysters, herring, red meat, legumes, and grains.

Heat helps absorb moisture.

Some skin has extremely small pores, making it harder to absorb the moisturize it needs. Try using heat when using moisturizers. Steam the scalp using warm water and a simple shower cap to open up the pores of the scalp and allow it to absorb the most important nutrients from your products.

Apply a moisturizer, cover with the cap, and hold for at least five minutes. It not

Natural remedies are often thought to be less effective. On the contrary, high-chemical products only have a short-term effect, and in the long run can weaken and dry out hair. When choosing haircare products, look for those that contain as many natural substances as possible, such as aloe, chamomile flower oil, wheat, nettle, sage extracts, etc., as well as vitamins like keratin. Dry hair benefits from ingredients such as mango butter, jojoba, coconut, shea, argan and macadamia oils. Natural ingredients provide a less rapid, but long-lasting effect by helping restore and maintain the hair’s vitality, moisture, shine, and smoothness. At least a couple of times a week, the hair should be pampered with a mask selected according to their type. Be sure to moisten the ends and nourish with hair oil. It will prevent the ends from splitting and branching, protecting against split ends.

MASCARA WAND

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