Thinking Aloud Magazine: Jan-Mar 2022

THINKING ALOUD

A QUARTERLY MAGAZINE publication of rehoboth dream solid foundation (rdsf)

ISSUE

17 JAN - MAR 2022

CONTENTS

Cover Photo: Mr Taiwo Akinlami

Dr. Folasade Hunsu Department of English, Obafemi Awolowo University, Nigeria

Mr. Patrick Edebor Editorial/publishing consultant. Owner, Patrick Edebor and Associates.

Mr. Akin Adejuwon Curator, Institute of Cultural Studies, Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife.

Mr. Rotimi Lawuyi FCA Owner, RAMA Editors.

Dr. Mrs Olayinka Opadiya Senior Pastor, Every Nation Church Sydney Australia.

Mrs. Abimbola Komolafe Founder/Executive Director, Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Rear Admiral (Rtd) Oladeinde Joseph , Chairman, Board of Trustees Pharm. Samson Igbokwe Mrs Roseline Igbokwe Mrs Ronke Osikoya Ms Ketumi Alasa Pastor (Dr) Joshua Opadiya Dr (Mrs) Yinka Opadiya Mrs Abimbola Komolafe Rear Admiral (Rtd) K O Komolafe

Editor Bimbo Komolafe

Publication & Design Benjamin Eze

Project Manager Tomi Olatunde-Idowu

Project Team Edison Egere

@2022. Thinking Aloud Magazine, a publication of Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Othniel Komolafe Grace Adoga Celestina Osiki

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.

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EDITORIAL

ISSUE

17

JAN - MAR 2022

Dear Readers,

Welcome to the Q1, 2022 edition of Thinking Aloud (TA) produced by Rehoboth Solid Dream Foundation (RDSF). I believe the first quarter of the year has been a great one for us all.

Our cover story for this edition features an interview with Mr Taiwo Akinlami, a seasoned legal practitioner and Child Protection Advocate, who recently launched a #noprotectionnoschool campaign, with a mission to secure a friendly and protective environment for children. He shares the story of his childhood as a victim of abuse and how he channelled this experience into a passion to protect children. The interview is very enlightening and addresses vital issues concerning child protection and development.

Our RDSF Trustees Corner contains a very inspiring interview with an esteemed trustee of RDSF. She shares her journey in the corporate world and her experience with the foundation.

In our Finance Column, Mr Ayodeji Ebo, an investment professional, talks about Ponzi schemes, with practical tips on identifying and avoiding them while our parenting column highlights the importance of setting parenting goals.

This quarter, the RSDF success column shares the story of Mrs. Onundi "Lara" Tosin whose dream of becoming a registered nurse was facilitated by RDSF. As usual, our fitness and health columns are furnished with tips on maintaining wellness. The Fitness Column gives a detailed article on the functionality of water and hydration for the human body. We have 2 health articles; one shares tips on living a long and stress-free life while the second article focuses on Vitamin B-12 deficiency.

Do have a pleasant reading experience and remember to show some love by sharing this magazine with your contacts and loved ones.

Wishing you all the best in 2022.

Bimbo Komolafe Editor connect with us on social media | thinkingaloudmagazine

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‘GOALS’: SETTING PARENTING GOALS

I wonder if you like to make new year’s resolutions. If you like to set goals that stretch you. There is something about the start of a new year that inspires me and many others to aim for better, higher, greater.

There is much to be said about the benefits of setting goals. Having goals gives hope as we aspire to achieve them. It can help us focus on key elements that are important to us. The intentionality and focus of goal setting makes us more likely to achieve important things.

As parents, we may have aspirations for our children.

Depending on personality, some parents may have clearly defined goals with timelines for each child. Other parents may have general lifestyle ambitions for them, which may have been formed before they were even born!

I am reminded of a quote which I heard several years ago during a leadership training course. It went something along the lines of “If you consider yourself to be a leader, look behind you. If there is no one following you, you are not a leader.

You are simply taking a walk.” This quote portrays the importance of ensuring that we carry others along with us in our journey. This is true for leaders. I believe that it is also true for parents.

Parents usually have hopes and aspirations for their children because they want the best for them. The privilege of our role and influence as a parents stems from the relationship we have with our child.

The quality of the relationship will always affect the quality of the parenting, and we do well to consider this when setting goals with our children. Making sure that our children know that we love and accept them right now, just the way they are is a very good start.

Perhaps it’s attending a particular type of school or university or pursuing a particular professional career.

Yet a child’s goals are most likely to be met with success and integrity when they are the genuine desire of the child, when they are authentic. Ideally, the child’s and parent’s goals are aligned.

Yet, even with aligned goals, attainment is not guaranteed, so it’s important to enjoy the journey. “Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans” is a quote often attributed to John Lennon. This reminds me to enjoy the journey of working towards goals. After all, life doesn’t start when I reach a particular milestone-- life is happening already.

In my parenting relationship, this means regularly reviewing the impact of working towards a goal on my children. Are we still aligned on the goal? Am I so focused on a goal that it is negatively impacting our relationship or my child? If so, can I try a different, more agreeable strategy?

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Bisi Olaye writes from the UK. She is married and a mother of three children. She is a counsellor in training and on the board of governors for a primary school in Surrey England. She is passionate about educating the whole child. | 5 |

IDENTIFYING AND AVOIDING PONZI SCHEMES

With the prevalence of the collapse of several ponzi schemes (or multilevel marketing schemes) , it’s important we educate ourselves on some of the ways we can identify and therefore avoid investing in Ponzi schemes. Nigerians have lost billions of naira to different forms of Ponzi schemes in recent times. The DirectorGeneral of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) said in March 2021 that about three million Nigerians lost N18.0billion to Ponzi scheme operators.

What is a Ponzi Scheme?

A Ponzi scheme is a type of investment fraud. Ponzi scheme is a pyramid scheme that operates on the basis of “robbing Peter to pay Paul.” Simply put, it functions by paying previous investors the promised/guaranteed returns from the funds received from new investors. This is the oldest and most common type of investment fraud.

Charles Ponzi was one of the most notorious people who perpetrated this type of scam, which is why it was named after him. Essentially, he collected money from people who were interested in investing in his business and then paid investors huge interest payments from the money he obtained from the new investors. Although Charles Ponzi didn’t create this form of investment fraud, his operation was the first to become known in the United States.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Some of the warning signs to look out for in order to avoid investing in Ponzi schemes include: 1. Unusually high investment returns: Any investment that has a guaranteed return that is significantly higher than the interest rate on fixed income instruments or any conventional investment opportunity should be cautiously examined.

When you are offered placement/fixed deposit at an interest rate significantly higher than your bank, you should be careful and ask more questions. Remember the adage, if it’s too good to be true, it probably is.

You need to ask questions like, where do you invest the funds? Who are the sponsors of the business and what is their track record?

You need to ask questions like, where do you invest the funds?

Who are the sponsors of the business and what is their track record? | 6 |

2. Guaranteed returns: Beyond the unreasonable high returns, if an investment promises a guaranteed return outside the conventional investment like fixed income instruments, then you should be wary of that type of investment. Unless you invest directly in fixed income instruments like Treasury Bills, Commercial Papers, Bonds, or placement with banks and reputable firms, then no investment should guarantee returns. It’s good to note that returns on mutual funds are not guaranteed, and the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) prohibits this. The portfolio manager only works towards delivering an impressive return. Additionally, the payment of the returns is more frequent (daily, weekly, monthly etc.) than the traditional investments. Greed is your greatest enemy when investing.

It’s good to note that returns on mutual funds are not guaranteed, and the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) prohibits this.

4. Ambiguous business model: The rule of thumb is that if you do not understand how a company generates income after five minutes of explanation, stay away from it. Most investment frauds use complex business models that confuse investors.

Most investment frauds use complex business models that confuse investors.

5. Pressure to reinvest/Get new investors: Most Ponzi schemes cannot survive without new investors or new funds. Hence, the structure will either promise existing investors a return to introduce new investors or promise to give a higher rate to prevent you from taking out your funds. The scheme breaks down when new funds stop flowing, and several investors want to cash out simultaneously.

The scheme breaks down when new funds stop flowing, and several investors want to cash out simultaneously.

We need to guard preciously our hard-earned money with great care and avoid losing funds to Ponzi schemes.

Ponzi schemes are more prominent in periods of very low interest rate in the fixed income market prompting investors to search for investment with higher yields to beat the high inflation rate.

3. Unregistered investments & unlicensed firm: In most cases, investment products sold by fraudulent investment outfits are not registered with SEC. This is against the SEC rule that requires that any investment sold to the public should be registered with the Commission. Also, these companies are not licensed/regulated by the CBN or/and SEC. Before you make any investment, you can confirm the status of the investment on the CBN or SEC website. This will significantly minimize your risk of falling prey to Ponzi schemes.

Before you make any investment, you can confirm the status of the investment on the CBN or SEC website.

Ayodeji Ebo is an Investment expert with over 15 years’ experience in Business & Investment Strategy, Economic and Investment Research. He has worked with various reputable Securities companies and was the Senior Economist/Head, Research & Strategy at a Merchant Bank. Ayodeji was also the Managing Director of Afrinvest Securities Limited for about four years.

For more investment tips and opportunities.

Instagram: @getfinanceandinvestmenttips YouTube: @ayodejiebo Contact: ebo.ayodeji@gmail.com | 7 |

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DO MEN GRIEVE AFTER A MISCARRIAGE?

It was December 2013 and I was about 10weeks pregnant. We had been married for about 4 months and I remember how excited we both were about the pregnancy.

I remember grumbling to my husband that I was no longer feeling pregnant; my breasts were no longer tender, I had suddenly started ‘feeling well’ and the most suspicious symptom was my appetite – it was back! I had visited my mum on Sunday and she made òjòjò for me that afternoon.

Boy, I wolfed everything down. I just knew something wasn’t right with my body. My husband and I decided that we should go for a scan and we were told right there that I had suffered a missed abortion. I was subsequently advised to go for a medical evacuation.

It was tough to swallow, I thought I was about 10weeks gone but I had lost the baby at 8weeks. The next phase was to tell family and friends that we had lost the pregnancy. We were sad, we were embarrassed, angry, depressed and terribly hurt.

Everyone kept looking out for me, I got lots of calls and messages, prayers, encouraging words, everything necessary to make me not worry. But it was odd that THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

most people who called my husband either wanted to speak with me or console me through him.

Last week, I had a conversation with my colleagues and I had to share my miscarriage story with them.

While talking about it, I said “around the time we had a miscarriage……” and my colleague responded with “YOU had a miscarriage, YOU were the pregnant one so why are you saying we?”

My colleague is an amazing person and he definitely didn’t mean any harm or disrespect, he just said it the way he understood it. Biologically and yes physically, I suffered a miscarriage alone, but emotionally and mentally – my husband and I suffered a miscarriage.

Both of us were looking forward to being parents, so we both suffered that loss.

Biologically and yes physically, I suffered a miscarriage alone, but emotionally and mentally – my husband and I suffered a miscarriage. | 8 |

Some years back, I spoke with a friend whose wife suffered a miscarriage despite having a very challenging pregnancy. I asked him about how or whether he mourned after.

He shared with me how he had to pretend to be the rock of the family and not wear his emotions on his sleeves. His wife would wake up in the middle of the night, crying and shaming herself for being too weak to carry a baby because, after all their dog just birthed 11 puppies and she (the dog) was doing fine.

He shared with me how he had to pretend to be the rock of the family and not wear his emotions on his sleeves.

space to mourn or talk about it. Do we look out for them at all when their partners suffer a miscarriage?

Women are naturally and socially conditioned to openly display grief; we are allowed to cry, we can share our experiences with friends and cry while at it.

But men are not allowed to. You hear things like “toughen up, you’re a man, why are you crying? Are you a woman? How do you expect your wife to feel, seeing you in this state?”

Men and women do not handle anguish or grief the same way, but I think we should allow men the same space and empathy we give to women when it comes to grieving after a miscarriage or any type of grief in general.

We need to let them understand that it’s perfectly fine to grieve and sometimes, it is okay to cry. To the men, when your friends go through a miscarriage, check up on them and genuinely ask how they are holding up.

And to the man reading this whose partner just suffered a miscarriage, may you find comfort and healing. Amen.

He said he couldn’t tell her that he also felt incapable for not being able to do something to avert the miscarriage (like he could really do something about it), he couldn’t tell her how much he would cry in the car before walking into their apartment after work. He couldn’t tell her how much he missed buying her a pack of Soda Water every other day because it was her biggest craving, he missed her default excuse of not wanting to do anything because “abeg I’m pregnant, I can’t open the door.”

Men and women do not handle anguish or grief the same way, but I think we should allow men the same space and empathy we give to women when it comes to grieving after a miscarriage or any type of grief in general.

He missed her default excuse of not wanting to do anything because “abeg I’m pregnant, I can’t open the door.”

He missed the daily notifications from the pregnancy app they both downloaded to monitor the pregnancy which he had to delete after the miscarriage. He missed thinking himself a dad-to-be. “Adenike forget o, I mourned real bad, I just couldn’t show it.”

Do men grieve after a miscarriage? I think they do but we hardly allow them to, we seldom give them the

Adenike O. Lanlehin is a Broadcaster and Event Comperé resident in Lagos.

Contact her on Instagram @adenikeradio. | 9 |

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INTERVIEW WITH MR TAIWO AKINLAMI

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Q1. Tell us about your childhood, family and education.

I come from a family of eight; I am the first of six children, a twin. Growing up was not a bed of roses as it came with a lot of challenges. Our father worked in paid employment and his pay was hardly enough to cater for our basic needs. We lived in a densely populated building in what is called a “face -me-I-face-you” apartment.

I attended public primary and secondary schools in Ado Ekiti, with different infrastructural inadequacies. My childhood was a bountiful basket of abuse, and this led to me running away from home at the age of 12. Growing up I was always chastised for things I did wrong and never commended for things I did right, and this made me feel quite worthless.

I lost my innocence at the age of 6 to an older female neighbour, who my mother would usually keep me with while she went to the market. This ruined my sexuality as a child and led to me having sexual relationships with other children. I suffered from all forms of abuse, physical, emotional, sexual and neglect.

I left home at the age of 18 for Lagos after I completed my secondary school. Growing up, I never had a father-son relationship with my father, my memory of him was that of fear and anxiety. I was never taught that freedom came with responsibility. At that point of my life I was trying so hard to detach from the realities of life, I reacted to my childhood abuse by exhibiting youthful vices of all kinds.

I got into the university at the age of 20, Lagos state University where I studied law.

After graduation I went to the Nigerian law school, Abuja campus. In the university I battled with the feeling of not wanting to be rejected, I therefore hardly made contributions in class. I went into student unionism for self-expression, it brought me fame but not freedom. I only began to prepare myself for adulthood at the age of 27, nine years into adulthood. I had suffered from low self-esteem for years; I was shy and could not confront real issues. I massaged my ego by hanging out with numerous ladies and got addicted to alcohol, cigarettes, Indian hemp and sex. My childhood was not a pleasant experience.

Q2. What triggered/inspired your journey into child right/protection as a legal practitioner?

I found a bigger calling and self-worth when I gave my life to Christ at 27. Upon graduation from law school, I had the option to practice law at the firm of my uncle, Chief Gani Fawehinmi, who sponsored my university and the law school education, but I chose to pursue an area of law that gave me a sense THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

of fulfilment ensuring that all children protected and their childhood is preserved.

are

With experiences I had as a child, being exposed to all forms of abuse and feeling a sense of worthlessness, I made it a duty and a calling to ensure that other children do not go through what I did.

If you look at our society today, most of the issues we face are from mismanaged childhood manifesting in dysfunctional adulthood. I have chosen to bring to the front burner of the consciousness of all, the private and public issues concerning “securing a friendly and protective environment” for children.

I have come to understand that when the rights of children are enforced, the children are protected, and childhood is preserved.

With experiences I had as a child, being exposed to all forms of abuse and feeling a sense of worthlessness, I made it a duty and a calling to ensure that other children do not go through what I did.

Q3. In one of your articles, you mentioned that death sentence for a child rapist has not been the right approach to prevent raping children. Can you tell us the possible preventive measures that you think will help to curb this menace in the country?

Yes, I believe that death is not the best punishment for rapists because rapists are made, they are not born. You can see from my story how I was abused as a child at six years old. As a result of that abuse, I became sexually active. I began having sex as a child, you know, abusing other children, girls and boys alike.

Most times rapists and abusers are also victims of abuse. To address this, we must go into the factory that makes abusers and correct it from there. I am not saying that an abuser should not be allowed to face the consequence of his/her actions, by all means they should. I am however saying that they should be given the opportunity to be rehabilitated.

Abusers need help and so also the abused. The thinking is that death serves as a deterrence to other people but that is not a deterrence in the favour of the one that is already abused. The real deterrence is to preserve the childhood of our precious children and they will pay the society back by preserving the childhood of others around them. | 12 |

Q4. In your #noprotectionnoschool campaign, you are calling for a system of prevention. Kindly give us a description of the kind of system you envision and how you think this system will enhance a safe environment for our children?

Our #noprotectionnoschool campaign started shortly after the death of Sylvester Oromoni, which was allegedly due to bullying and ingestion of chemical substances while being bullied by other students of his school.

We started a broadcast which can be found on our YouTube channel (Taiwo Akinlami YouTube Channel), where we explained that no school should be open without a child protection system in place, because we believe that the primary responsibility of a school is to protect.

Every school should have a child protection system that is functional and codified into a policy and is broken down into processes on which every stakeholder (including students and parents) of the school is trained to know their responsibilities in engaging the system to protect the precious children under their care.

About 11 years ago, we found through research that answers to PREVENTION are in Securing A Friendly and Protective Environment for Children in our homes, schools and everywhere we send them to. Thus, we began to say Enlightenment is Superior to Enforcement. Think about it like ‘prevention is better than cure’. Our precious children are ONLY safe when a S.A.F.E SYSTEM, codified into a POLICY, and broken down into PROCESSES is our foundation.

The campaign has however moved beyond the school system, and we have called it the #NOPROTECTIONNOCHILDHOOD Campaign.

Every child-focused organization and family therefore has to have a system in place to effectively protect children and prevent abuse.

Every school should have a child protection system that is functional and codified into a policy and is broken down into processes on which every stakeholder (including students and parents) of the school is trained to know their responsibilities in engaging the system to protect the precious children under their care.

Q5. In Nigeria, the percentage of children adopted from orphanage homes is very low and it is believed that the process of adoption is very difficult. What can be done to increase this percentage so that these children can have the opportunity to be cared for in a family?

The ideal situation is for a child to be raised in a family, indeed, one of their survival rights is the right to a wholesome family. There are however children who are displaced due to various reasons; death of their parents, abuse, neglect, and they find themselves taken to orphanage homes. It is important for families and parents to know that adoption is a possibility. Of course, with the strictest, though not impossible conditions and background checks to ensure that they fit in the right homes.

Secondly, adoption is also an issue that is not very much accepted in Nigeria, in the sense that a lot of people and families cannot really relate to their family members adopting children. Therefore, adopted children tend to be ostracized, given unequal treatment and discriminated against. So those are the issues. We must reorientate the members of the society. I have worked with the Lagos State Government in the past to sensitize adoptive parents and helped to understand the disposition of the society towards adopted children and how to handle the same.

The other issue is that the processes of adoption in Nigeria is cumbersome both for local and international adoptive parents. There must be a commitment to simplify the process without compromising its integrity and I think it is time Nigeria became a signatory to the Hague Convention on Intercountry adoption, which laid out the procedure for international adoption.

Q6. Looking at some of the recent issues emanating from boarding schools, what are the factors parents should consider before sending their children to boarding school? Are there measures/policies the government can put in place to enhance safety in boarding schools?

The Best INTEREST of the child must always be the deciding factor in sending a child to the boarding school. Most people send their children to boarding school because it is convenient, and convenience is always inimical to thoroughness.

KEY Questions parents must ask before they register their precious children in a boarding school are: IS YOUR CHILD YOUR VALUE AMBASSADOR? Can your precious child stand his/her ground in character and defend his/her Family Value System, both in the time of peace and confrontation? | 13 |

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IS YOUR CHID OLD ENOUGH? Is he/she old enough to identify forms of abuse from both peers and caregivers and bold enough to self-protect as an immediate response?

IS THE CHILD TRAINED TO SPEAK UP? Can the child speak up and report to the school or you, when necessary, when he/she faces abuses from peers and caregivers without intimidation?

IS THE SCHOOL CHILD PROTECTION COMPLIANT? Does the school have a Child Protection System, codified into a Policy, broken into processes for implementation on which every stakeholder is trained periodically? The policy must have provisions peculiar to a boarding school.

WHO IS RUNNING THE BOARDING SCHOOL? What mechanisms have been put in place for DUE DILIGENCE in hiring the personnel who give care to your precious children in the boarding school, noting that the closer people are to our children, the higher the possibility of abuse?

We can’t exhaust the issues here. The government also has a role to play in the making of policies and standard operating rules for boarding schools and the enforcement of same.

Q7. Let us look at the issue of out of school children in Nigeria. According to UNICEF, one in every five of the world’s out of school children is in Nigeria even though primary education is officially free and compulsory. Do you think Nigeria is paying enough attention to this situation? How best do you think the government should tackle this issue?

Around2019, over 13.5 million children were out of school. During the COVID lockdown, over 36 million Nigerian children did not have access to education as they did not have access to the internet.

One would expect to see a reduction in the number over the years. We however have more children out of school today. There are many factors responsible for the rise in the numbers. One of the factors is ignorance of parents. In some parts of Nigeria , girls are still denied education, even though it is a fundamental right of children under the Child’s Right Act, 2003.

The real body responsible for enforcing the rights of children by all stakeholders is the government. It is to ensure that parents get enlightenment and are orientated and compliant.

Another major reason would be lack of infrastructure, schools and teachers. The question is, if every child in Nigeria enrols for school, do we have THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

enough classrooms and have enough teachers to properly cater for them? So, we need to begin to investigate creation of schools and more classrooms.

Because now, we have over 80,000 private schools in Nigeria. So, let's imagine that we didn't have these private schools. Can the public schools properly cater for the children we have now? As we enforce compulsory education, we have to also look at our current system and see how we can correct it so more children can go to school and get effective education.

I think the government simply lacks the political will to give education to the Nigerian child. Such political will can only be generated by the mobilized public will of the people demanding for education.

This is because education is one of the basic rights of the Nigerian child, irrespective of the fortune or poverty of their parents.

Q8. You had your first child last year after waiting for 15 years. What advise do you have for couples still expecting their first child after a long time in marriage? Were there extended family pressures and how were you able to manage their expectations?

Yes, we had our first child, Tieriayooluwa, a boy on October 25, 2021. He is a bundle of joy and we have been so elated. He has just been a joy in our lives.

The experience of waiting was an educative one for us. In fact, we call it a period of preparation, we had prepared for 15 years to do the job of raising this child for his first 18 years.

So, we encourage anyone who is waiting, that it is a process to prepare. While we know that thoughts of sadness may creep in, one must not lose joy and faith.

Here was our thinking, if we give in to fear and anxiety and become shadows of ourselves as a couple, while waiting for a child, how do you regain those years of anxiety and fear, where you withheld enjoying your life, when the child eventually comes?

My wife, for example, says that the major testimony for her is that while we were waiting and preparing for our precious child, she embraced God’s peace.

So, keeping our peace and joy in that preparation process was important.

Handling family pressures? Yes there was pressure here and there but this was out of concern for us from members of our extended family. We commend them ultimately for respecting our disposition to handling the issue of waiting and preparation for our precious child. However, one thing I did was to protect my wife from being pressured by both of our families. I confronted every situation and pieces of advice that could be considered as pressure. In some instances, I did not even bother to inform her. | 14 |

Having a child wasn't an issue, even though we desired to, the real issue for us was to refuse our lives, love and progress to be punctuated by the fact that we were waiting to have our child. Our perspective and understanding was more of being prepared by God for the child that was coming than waiting. We struggled to use the word, waiting. We were guided by three principles gleaned from a sage: first, God is never late, second, our times are in His hands and lastly, when we are due, we will not be deprived.

Having a child wasn't an issue, even though we desired to, the real issue for us was to refuse our lives, love and progress to be punctuated by the fact that we were waiting to have our child.

Q9. How would you describe an ideal world where you would want your child to grow? And how has the birth of your child changed your routine?

A world that pays actual notice to children and is committed to Securing A Friendly and Protective Environment for children. This is the world fit for our precious children and this is possible if we desire and work tenaciously towards it.

Oh yes, having our son has altered our lives but in the most beautiful ways. We call him the boss, because he runs his own time and beckons on us for his needs at any time of the day. It's a full-time responsibility because he has come to show us how much we need to do.

No matter how much we are prepared for a child, we can't be prepared enough. So we keep learning of God as we journey on to empower our children.

Q10. What advise do you have for a family where both parents have busy work schedules; especially in a city like Lagos on matters regarding their ability to physically raise their children?

These issues are not black and white really because a lot of parents want to give their children the best so they work so hard, but this must not be at the expense of their availability to raise the precious children.

The family needs to have a roundtable discussion to see what can be done. Can one parent work remotely? Can a trusted professional help be hired to assist? These dynamics must be decided by the parents IN THE BEST INTEREST OF CHILDREN. The quality of time is also important not just the quantity.

Q11. In one of your articles, you stated that parenting is a four-dimensional project requiring the undivided attention of four institutions. Kindly describe these dimensions and the institutions involved in parenting.

Yes, it is a four-dimensional responsibility, we have the family. Second, the community, the third is the state, and finally, the international community. The family is responsible for inculcating positive values in children.

The community includes schools. churches and the likes. The role of the community is to reinforce the values inculcated by the family.

The state, represented by the government, plays the role of promulgating laws, developing policies, and organizing the framework within which the laws and polices are to be implemented, making social investment to create social protection and achieve laudable social impact.

The foregoing will help the family focus on its primary responsibility of inculcating positive values in our children.

The last dimension; International Community, which plays its role in international policy formulation, treaties and conventions, and intervention, thereby creating universal standards.

It is important to note that though the family is first, it can not raise children alone.

That is why we developed the concept of primary and secondary parents in our parenting according to Social Protection.

There is no nation on earth, worthy to be called a nation, where the family alone is loaded with the onerous responsibility of raising children.

There is no one family, no matter how rich and influential, that has all it takes to effectively bring out all the potentials, preloaded in a child by God. We see that in Nigeria, the family and community play the role of the state, providing the needs of a child.

However, to bring out the best in our precious children these things ought not to be.

There is no one family, no matter how rich and influential, that has all it takes to effectively bring out all the potentials, preloaded in a child by God. | 15 |

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Q13. There are many children subjected to child labour and abuse simply because of their parents’ financial status. What do you think the government can do to curb this menace?

Child labour is a direct consequence of two things; the state of the nation and the state of mind of the parents. The State of the nation is a very major one and until we discuss that and create long term solutions, we would be addressing parents and caregivers, without going to the root of the problem.

Q12. You have been a child protection advocate for over two decades. Do you think children are better protected now compared to the 90s? How would you describe the impact of changing cultural values/ practice in our society on parenting?

Well, I would say that as the society is changing, so are the dynamics of protection, and safety issues.

In my own days, for example, children did not have easy access to the TV or internet. You had to get your parents’ consent because these things were under lock and key.

To watch anything that is illicit, we needed to be extra, careful. But now, a lot of things have become democratized and, materials are at the fingertips and the beck and call of children. I won't say that one era is better than the other, I will say that dynamics have changed.

As parents of children in, both primary and secondary schools, we need to actually step up our game to understand the dynamics of protection in this time and create systems to prevent abuse from happening.

Proper care anticipates the needs of children and the threats to them and doing everything possible to mitigate those threats. This is in line with global best practices, and to meet those needs well before they arise .

In my own days, for example, children did not have easy access to the TV or internet. You had to get your parents’ consent because these things were under lock and key.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

So, the government just needs to rise up to the occasion, and ensure that parents enjoy their rights.

Parents rights are children's rights, when the rights of parents are protected, the rights of children are protected. Until parents’ right are enforced, and they enjoy the basic things that make them human, the menace of child labour would not stop because parents who are being ill-treated will likely mete out ill treatment to their children.

It may not be child labour, it could be verbal abuse or emotional abuse because parents are going through a lot, so until poverty is solved as a nation and people can boast of a reasonable standard of living (and not living on less than $1 per day as we have now), we cannot fully solve the problem of child labour.

Parents rights are children's rights, when the rights of parents are protected, the rights of children are protected.

Q14. What is the place of faith in your life journey?

Faith is everything for me. It is how I live. It is who I am. I cannot hold anything to my own account. I am what I am because of faith. Faith changed my life.

I always say that, if I had died, or be in a mental home right now, it would have been befitting because of the life I previously led.

However, God, through faith in Jesus Christ took charge of my life and turned it around so I owe everything to Him. My journey is defined as faith in Jesus Christ and his power to transform lives.

Q15. We always like to end with a question on your life outside work? What do you do when not working? How do you keep fit and healthy?

I like to read and watch documentaries about persons of sound mind. I also like to listen to music.

With the recent birth of my son. I like to talk and play with him. For fitness purpose, I enjoy walking. | 16 |

RDSF TRUSTEES CORNER

I then delved into Finance and became the Credit Control Manager for MRS Oil Nigeria Plc’, Aviation Commercial, Retail Sales Manager for South East/South West Nigeria and finally Head of Sales & Marketing (national) (equivalent of National General Manager in other oil companies) before I took early retirement at the age of 50.

I am an ordained minister with The Redeemed Evangelical Mission (TREM) and have been a member of this church for 32 years. I have at various times held important positions which include Chairman, Disciplinary Committee of the Evangel Voices Choir and Team Lead with the Christian Women Fellowship. I am also a proud Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

I am happily married to my best friend, confidant & advisor and we are blessed with five children who are all successful in their various fields.

Q1. Tell us about your background – childhood, family, education and work experience.

I am the last child of four children of my parents.

My father was a firm disciplinarian, he only counselled and never used the cane on me until I left his home for marriage at age 21. My mum was the ever-loving one who used the cane to discipline me whenever I did something wrong, and today, I still appreciate that for some reasons. I gained most of my educational qualifications on the job. I first worked with Texaco, which later became ChevronTexaco and is now Chevron. While working, I applied for “Tuition Aid” from my company for my first degree with University of Lagos, which was approved.

I got in, graduated, and then applied for another first degree in Applied Information Technology at Sikkim Manipal University, Manipal, India, which was also approved. I got in, graduated, and then applied for an MBA with University of Lagos and this was also approved. This was how I got educated and acquired skills over the years.

This took me from being a Stenographer, to Personal Secretary, to Confidential Secretary, to Executive Secretary, to Food Mart Supervisor, and then to Senior Retail Business Consultant.

When Chevron downstream was acquired by MRS Oil Nigeria Plc, I became the District Sales Manager, South-West Nigeria.

Q2. Is there anyway your upbringing has influenced your choice of charity? Are there other charity organizations you volunteer for?

I would say yes in a way, because I grew up seeing my mum helping the downtrodden and constantly providing help and assistance to the less fortunate.

She adopted two of my half siblings and treated them no less than she did the rest of us. She was a philanthropist even until she passed on to glory. I would say categorically, without mincing words, that aside from the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation (RDSF), I do not belong to any other charitable organization.

Q3. You are a pioneer trustee of the RDSF, can you share with us what inspired you to join the board despite it being a pro bono service?

Honestly, what inspired me to join RDSF was the calibre of other members of the board. They are well-informed, with honourable intentions, people of high integrity, transparent and selfless.

Q4. You are a deaconess in the church and we also noticed that majority of the current members of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation Board Of Trustees were at one time or the other leaders in their local churches. Do you think there is a correlation between faith, practice and charity work?

I will say “Yes””. One thing you should know is that with every human being, God has deposited His plan and purpose even way before creating us. So “Yes” to the possibility that our faith might have something to do with our foundation.. Some nonChristians, Muslims, Jews, Atheists, Agnostics, etc who have been brought up correctly and are able to realize the need for charity and have the means to do it, also have been paramount in the creation and success of multiple charities worldwide. | 18 |

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Q5. Based on the success you had in your career working in an esteemed corporate environment, do you think corporate entities in Nigeria are doing enough in executing Corporate Social Responsibility programs?

In the past, Corporate Social Responsibility was what most multinationals and corporate organizations had passion for as they used them to attract customers to their brands, provide better work environment for their employees and attract more investors etc.

This was done because companies that had ethical and social responsibilities successfully cultivated brand awareness and enhanced customer loyalty, and so, had competitive edge and attracted the best talents in society.

Social and ethical elements combined with technical tactics guaranteed long term productivity and financial success in these organizations. Now with what I can see, those good old days are no more as they used to be. I just hope and pray that this passion for CSR comes back.

Q6. You have been married for over 30years. Can you share with us some of the marital values that have kept your marriage?

I have been happily married for 34 years. I will not say it has all been a bed of roses, but what every person working towards marriage should know, is that a successful marriage requires God in the midst of their relationship, as well as selfdedication and effort in always trying to make things work.

Those were the values that helped us over the years.

We never allow the sun to go down upon our anger.

We pray together as a couple and also prayed with our children from birth. As tender as they were, we would lay them on the couch while we had our family devotions with the older ones.

My husband was the pastor of the house. Our policy is that whenever we have a misunderstanding, we settle it at night before devotion and become friends again. We then tell each other how much we love and cherish each other.

The fundamental beliefs that built our relationship reflects the identity that we have today in Christ.

God has been our First Love, our Father from time, the Head of our home, our Helper and our Source.

Without Him, we would not have lasted this long together.

Consequently, the key to thriving and having a long -lasting relationship as a couple is our compatible relationship values.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

The core values that helped us over the years, include respect for one another, forgiveness every single time, and constant communication regardless of the situation. , All of these helped immensely with conflict management in our home.

God has been our First Love, our Father from time, the Head of our home, our Helper and our Source.

Without Him, we would not have lasted this long together.

Q7. Even as a career person, you and your husband had to train five children. Kindly share some tips on how you were able to manage family routine with the demands of work.

As a career person and my husband, a busy Pharmacist/Businessman, I would say that it was not an easy task. However, because we ensured that God was brought into everything we set our minds to do, our faith helped us ease off the stress.

Training our children comprised mainly of constant godly counsel. Five children meant five personalities with five different characteristics. Remember that the home is the primary training ground for children and we must live up to expectations.

Our church’s children department helped a great deal in parenting collaboration. We ensured that all five of them learnt to pray and be independent; we supported their training and honing of work skills, social skills, manners, good attitude and even godly principles.

In Africa we have certain traditional marriage values and expectations from our husbands, and so I had to juggle my 8-5 (or 6-9 in most cases), with stopping by after work to buy groceries, cooking for the family, schooling to improve my education, and bringing the children up in the way of the Lord.

We also ensured that as disciplinarians, the children did not mix with certain neighbours and we watched the kind of friends they kept. They also were not allowed to watch TV until weekends so that they could concentrate on their school work.

Surprisingly, my job did not suffer as a result of this. I usually strive to go above set goals. Whilst this might have put strain on me, it did not deter me from pushing myself.

I am grateful that our children all turned out well by the grace of God and as parents, we have peace of mind as they all grew up to be very successful men and women. | 19 |

I will like to acknowledge my late mum and my late eldest sister of blessed memories whose intermittent visits helped a lot. As the last born in our family, I definitely got the best lessons and tips from them in parenting and living peacefully with my young family.

Q10. What project executed by the Foundation do you have the most emotional connection to and why?

Definitely giving back to teachers. Parents easily forget that teachers are the least paid and the least recognized professionals, yet they provide half of the training our children need.

Q8. Still on parenting, we have seen a rise in social vices within the last few years amongst our youth.

As someone who has been mentoring young ones, kindly share your thoughts on how this menace can be curbed in our society.

I have mentored a small section in my church of our youth right from my young adulthood., Today I can say that the government and parents have failed the upcoming generation. I wish everyone was able to bring God into their homes and train up their children in the way of the Lord right from kindergarten up until university. The quest for getting rich in our society and the elders’ lifestyles have caused some of the youths to follow negative ways.

Teachers do have positive impact and power to change lives as they are the ones that see these children grow to adulthood. Whenever RDSF recognizes and supports some of them, in the past, I have shed some tears of joy with lots of gratitude in my heart for them.

I feel we should also not give up yet on the younger generation, because where there is life, the hope of God changing things supersedes everything.

Churches and religious leaders should organize programmes to reorientate them to think positively.

Good research on the type of NGO they want to go into, the vision and goals must be clear, and they must ensure that the NGO is properly registered with the government. The ability to raise funds and demonstrate integrity to manage the funds well is also very important. , This will ensure availability of funds for the programs. They should also carefully and prayerfully look for likeminded people with high integrity.

Parents should work to have close relationships with their children and if they see anything that is untoward, they should ask questions, critically review the situation and give moral advice where necessary. If we all continue without giving up, our youths and the country at large will come back to core African values.

Q9. The RDSF focusses on economic empowerment through charity activities in education, mentoring and skills acquisition. In your opinion, what is the most challenging problem confronting the educational system of Nigeria?

The most challenging problem confronting the educational system in Nigeria is lack of the youths believing in their God-given talents, as well as themselves. In our time, who were you to bribe a teacher to get great results? But it is a norm now which has affected the untapped potentials of these youths.

Q11. Based on your experience, what would be your advice to Nigerians interested in joining the board of an NGO or seeking to setup one?

Based on my experience with RDSF, I will ask anyone trying to set up an NGO or join one to consider a number of things. They need to be certain they have passion for the project. This is paramount.

Q12. We would like to end this interview by asking you to share with our readers your health and fitness routine because one can hardly guess your age by your looks.

Hahahahaha! My health and fitness routines vary. I do brisk walking in most cases with my husband and I also try to eat healthy, I drink about 5 to 6 bottles of 500ml of water daily. I don’t joke with my fruits first thing in the morning, I eat vegetables and portion-size my carbs and fatty foods. I also love cooking and baking what I eat in most cases.

Unfortunately, this situation is not helped by the lecturers who accept bribes., Though not an excuse, the condition of service of these educators has room for improvement and is calling for Government attention.

For my looks, it is all about God. Prayerfully tell God how you want to look, don’t keep malice with people, forgive as quickly as possible, stay away from negative people, preach the gospel to people you meet, laugh always and be happy. I thank God for the husband God gave me and the children He blessed us with. I can honestly tell you, that they bring so much joy to my heart and I very rarely have any cause to feel sad or angry in any way (which I hear causes wrinkles)!

I believe that if parents shun the act of giving bribes and instead, mentor their children, this generation will lead the continent to become the giant that Africa is known to be.

I also try to always remember that God is the one that gives health, so I thank Him for His unfailing grace and mercy towards me.

Thank you! | 20 |

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Mr Joseph Ogunleye is one of the foremost beneficiaries of the Foundation. He holds a Bachelor’s degree in marketing and a Master’s degree in Management from the University of Lagos. He is a business consultant and the managing partner of Agile Management Consulting.

Support RDSF to reduce out of school children The Foundation has supported over 250 students through its scholarship programmes and currently has 55 beneficiaries still undergoing our programmes.

LATEST UPDATES FROM RDSF

In 2016, the Foundation embarked on a special project to reduce the number of “out of school” children by partnering with other local Non Governmental Organisations (NGO) to identify and sponsor indigent primary and secondary school students.

We are thrilled to report that four of our secondary school beneficiaries completed their education last year with excellent WAEC results and two of them are amputees

The Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation is a charity organization with the mission to uplift the social and economic wellbeing of the less privileged through educational support, mentoring and skills acquisition programs.

Last year, we supported 42 students through our scholarship programme and trained 50 persons in digital marketing and 70 persons in entrepreneurial development. We also awarded business grants to three of our mentees and we are impressed by the growth of these young start-ups. We have started the year on a high note by supporting 19 students and plans are underway to adopt more indigent students; especially those in tertiary institutions.

These students are not just given financial support but they are also mentored to ensure they achieve excellence in their chosen career through the administration of relevant soft skills and etiquette trainings. We will be building on the success of last year to administer more relevant soft skills that will enhance employability and entrepreneurship development amongst young graduates.

In January 2022, we introduced an in-house platform where past beneficiaries who are doing well in their chosen career can take part in mentoring our younger beneficiaries through their success stories and experiences in the corporate environment. The maiden edition was taken by Mr Joseph Ogunleye and the topic was ‘email etiquette’.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

BRIEF PROFILE OF SOME OUR BENEFICIARIES IN PRIMARY AND SECONDARY SCHOOLS Student A was in SS2 at the Nigeria Navy Secondary School Okura when he could not resume school with his other classmates because his parents who are locust beans farmers in a remote village in Kogi State could no longer afford his school fees. This was despite the school’s kind gesture of debt forgiveness and fee reduction. The Foundation is glad to have supported student A to complete his secondary education as the student eventually graduated with very good WAEC results.

Students B and C are currently SS2 students of Fortuneland Academy in Ogun State. Prior to their adoption by the Foundation in 2019, these students had suffered absenteeism from school due to the financial incapacity of their widowed mother. They had suffered inconsistency with their education for over two sessions; right from when their father was ill till after his demise. Their mother who is an afterschool teacher had other two children and was home-tutoring all four of them to the best of her ability. These children now have a stable education and have improved academically.

Student D is an SS2 student of Positive Learning College in Lagos and lives with his widowed mother and three siblings. He was knocked down by a motorcycle while returning from school in 2015 and because of his mother’s financial situation; who at the time was working as a school cleaner, he was | 22 |

not taken to the hospital, but to traditional bonesetters who were more affordable. He went through traditional treatment but the leg wouldn’t get better and by the time he was taken to the hospital, the leg had to be amputated. He therefore had to stay at home until an NGO offered him a prosthetic limb. Student D was adopted in 2016 by RDSF and we are excited to have supported him to date.

Student E is a JSS2 student of Blevour College in Ajegunle, Lagos. She lives with her grandmother who is a hairdresser in Ajegunle, a high density area in Lagos. Her mother is late while her father is laid down with stroke. Her primary education was funded through a recycling program; where parents are allowed to deliver reusable materials in exchange for their children’s school fees. The Foundation is happy to award her a scholarship and she is currently doing well in school.

Other Beneficiaries The Foundation still has twenty students in either private primary and secondary schools across Nigeria and they will be supported until they earn a tertiary education certificate. Some of these students are children of missionaries adopted in January 2021.

WAYS TO SUPPORT THE RDSF MISSION We sincerely appreciate all those who have contributed to the success stories of RDSF beneficiaries since inception. Your tremendous support has kept us focused on our mission and made us more determined to make more impact in our targeted communities.

Below are various ways to partner with the Foundation 1. Adopt a student scheme Under this scheme, the Foundation will recommend indigent students who will be adopted and sponsored for their full academic programme.

The sponsor can choose to be anonymous or meet the beneficiaries.

Here the sponsor will also be provided with a periodic statement of the beneficiary's academic performance.

2. Sponsor a Workshop/ Training/ Event You can also choose to sponsor any of our programmes like the Annual Lecture, Thinking Aloud Magazine and Teachers’ Excellence Award or support the skills acquisition programme organized for indigent undergraduates in various tertiary institutions to equip them with ICT and soft skills relevant to career success.

3. One Time Donation You can give one-time donation through a transfer to the Foundation's account or donate online through a secured donation link on our website.

4. Pledge Sponsors can also make a pledge to give some money to the Foundation on a regular basis (weekly, monthly, quarterly, biannually or annually). Such sponsors will just send an email with details of the pledge and credit the Foundation's account.

5. Workplace Giving and Matching Gifts Matching gifts are charitable workplace donations made by corporate entities that match employees’ donations to eligible non-profit organisations.

It is a way to show their employees that they are mindful of their social needs and support the causes they are most passionate about by empowering them to donate to any non-profit of their choice.

Different organizations have different matching policies and it will interest you to know that some international corporations can double your donations or more.

What this means is that if a staff should donate $100 to an NGO through a matching gift channel or work place giving, an organization with a 2:1 matching policy will donate additional $200 on behalf of that employee; making it $300 donation.

Many employees are not taking advantage of this platform and some are not even aware of the various workplace giving opportunities opened to them in their organisations; especially multinational corporations.

As a donor, you can increase your impact by donating through a matching gift platform like Benevity. The process is very simply and automated in most organisations. To do this, simply find out about your organisation’s workplace giving policies from your HR department.

If you would like to get RDSF listed or registered for your organisation’s workplace giving program, kindly send us an email through rehobothdream@gmail.com and we will be happy to work with you to achieve this.

6. Volunteer You can also volunteer your time and expertise by joining the RDSF team to carry out its daily operations and execute various projects across Nigeria.

Most of these voluntary services can be done remotely. | 23 |

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RDSF PROJECTS: MEET SOME OF OUR VOLUNTEERS

Abe Temidayo is a certified health worker and she holds a bachelor’s degree in psychology. She is an entrepreneur and currently undergoing her masters programme at the university of Lagos.

Mr Olowu Peter is a certified management consultant, chartered accountant, and certified project manager. He is also a fellow of the institute of management consultants of Nigeria. A seasoned trainer, and a member of several professional bodies including Association of Chartered Certified Accountant (ACCA) UK.

She served on the Foundation’s scholarship committee assisting with background checks. She was also instrumental in planning some of RDSF webinars and programs.

He is the Lead Consultant of Wistraledge Consulting, a consulting and training firm that specializes in human capacity building and management consulting services. He volunteered to train young and intending entrepreneurs online in 2020 and 2021 pro bono and was also a guest speaker at one of our webinars organized in 2020.

Ijongbola Gbenga is an experienced accounting and finance professional. He recently joined one of the “Big four” accounting firms as an advisory management consultant. Prior to joining the the accounting firm, he was the Head of Account/ Finance of Kegax Industries Limited.

Ayeni Shola is a graphic designer and content creator. He holds a B.Sc in sociology from the Ekiti State University and has been a volunteer with the Foundation since 2015, when the Foundation visited the University of Ibadan to award scholarship to indigent students.

Shola was also part of the team that conducted the ICT training session at Ekiti State University in 2016. He supported the annual lectures held in, 2018,and 2019 and was recently a member of the planning committee for the 2021 Teachers’ Excellence Award among others.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

He has worked in reputable companies operating in diverse industries such as FMCG distribution, hospitality manufacturing industry.

He bagged a B.Sc in Banking and Finance from Ekiti State University, Nigeria. He is a Chartered Member of the Nigeria Institute of Management, a professional member of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN) and currently enrolled in the National Open University of Nigeria for MBA programme with core specialization in Finance. Gbenga served in the scholarship committee to independently review online scholarship applications and interview applicants. | 24 |

HOPE RESTORED FUTURE ASSURED DREAMS ACHIEVED A REHOBOTH DREAM SOLID FOUNDATION SUCCESS STORY

All my life, my dream was to be a medical doctor or a nurse

However, I still couldn't meet up with my financial needs. I was on the verge of dropping out when my pastor, Rev M.O Ige told me he had some forms from REHOBOTH SOLID DREAM FOUNDATION which he got from the executive Trustee Mrs Bimbo Komolafe.

I am Mrs. Onundi "Lara" Tosin. All my Life, my dream was to be a medical Doctor or a Nurse. I have never been an average student so I was confident that my dream was achievable with determination and hard work. Life was pleasant until 2003 when my father started having this mysterious sickness that defiled all medical intervention.

I struggled to complete my secondary school and with my mum’s support I was bent on achieving my dreams, though the process became so long because of lack of funds. In 2012 I gained admission into a Nursing school and I was able to pay the fees for the first year without much discomfort.

I struggled to complete my secondary school and with my mum’s support I was bent on achieving my dreams, though the process became so long because of lack of funds.

This was from the little work and savings I had from working with a hospital as a clinical assistant.

My happiness became short lived when in my second year my father’s illness became so severe that to feed was so overwhelming for us, not to talk of paying school fees.

All we had was spent on his treatment. Nursing education was expensive and I had no other means except my mum and the family of Engr. Olusegun Olatunde Moses who helped out in their own way.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

I read through the terms and conditions and discovered I met the criteria on " Academic Excellence". I sent my applications and all necessary supporting academic reports.

The Foundation awarded me an annual bursary of seventy-five thousand naira for my second and my third years in school. This helped me achieve my dream of becoming a Nurse in no Small way, and today I am a specialist in Critical Care Nursing.

If RDSF did not come to my aid I would not have been able to achieve my dream of becoming a Nurse.

I also would have missed out on having a responsible husband.

When I was taken home to be introduced to my husband’s family, the head of my husband's family asked me what Level of Education I had. He said ‘We train our Female children and cannot allow our sons marry an illiterate’. Oh the joy on his face when I told him " I am a Registered Nurse Sir".

All thanks to Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation for coming to my rescue and supporting me in becoming a Registered Nurse.

If RDSF did not come to my aid I would not have been able to achieve my dream of becoming a Nurse. I also would have missed out on having a responsible husband. | 25 |

WATER, THE IMPORTANCE OF HYDRATION FOR GOOD HEALTH

You're constantly losing water and electrolytes throughout the day via breath, sweat, urine, and bowel movements, so even mild dehydration can exhaust you and affect many of your body's daily functions.

Drinking enough water each day is crucial for many reasons: regulating body temperature, keeping joints lubricated, preventing infections, delivering nutrients to cells, and keeping organs functioning properly.

Being well-hydrated also improves sleep quality, cognition, and mood in general. Experts recommend drinking about 11 cups of water each day for the average woman and 16 for men. Fortunately, not all of those cups have to come from plain water; for example, some can come from water flavoured with fruit or vegetables (lemons, berries, or orange or cucumber slices), or from coffee or tea.

But it’s best to stay away from beverages when trying to stay hydrated, says Walter Willet, professor of epidemiology and nutrition at Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health. Willett said that Americans are “conditioned to expect high levels of sweetness in everything…. You might say we are malhydrated, because we drink so much soda and fruit juice and other sugar-sweetened beverages, and by that I mean we drink beverages that harm our health. Even energy drinks and vitamin waters, most are loaded with sugar and not worth the use.”

Water is known as the elixir of life, with good reason.

Every system in your body needs it to survive. Water makes up about 60% of your body's weight, and although you can survive without food for weeks, dehydration can kill within days or even hours, depending on the temperature and your environment.

Dehydration means more water is moving out of your body's cells than into them and it's not just water that you lose. Small amounts of electrolytes critical to cell function and energy, such as sodium and potassium, are lost along with the water.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

The vast majority of your daily fluid intake should come from water. a person on a 2,200-calorie diet would drink about 50 fluid ounces of water a day, which is just over six cups (1.4 litres). Another 28 fluid ounces, which is 3.5 cups or just over 800 millilitres, could come from coffee or tea. There are health benefits to coffee. Studies show it can help with diabetes and has some modest cardiovascular benefits, "It's a mild antidepressant. In fact, studies show about a 50% lower risk of suicide with three to four cups of coffee a day." Tea has about a third the amount of caffeine as coffee, so you're much less likely to have sleep problems, but we don't see as many health benefits for tea as coffee.

The vast majority of your daily fluid intake should come from water. a person on a 2,200-calorie diet would drink about 50 fluid ounces of water a day, which is just over six cups (1.4 litres).

Dairy products such as yogurt, skimmed, and full cream, are also sold as 1% milk, as well as soy or other unsweetened alternatives such as almond milk. For adults who wish to add milk to their diet, the maximum amount per day would be two cups (almost 500 millilitres). Drinking milk is not really straightforward because it comes along with saturated fat, “and even low-fat milk is high in calories. Up to two servings a day is fine, but going beyond that is excessive." | 27 |

Non-Alkaline drinks include diet sodas, teas, and other beverages with non-calorie artificial or natural sweeteners such as aspartame, sucralose, and stevia.

There is growing evidence that these drinks might contribute to weight gain, they should therefore be seen as an "occasional treat." it is stated that we should consume no more than 16 ounces a day (2 cups or almost 500 millilitres); keep in mind that a typical can of soda is 12 ounces.

Then comes alcohol, whole fat milk, sports drinks, vitamin-enhanced waters, fruits and vegetable juices.

Yes, even fruit and veggie drinks are capped at 4 ounces a day." Fruit juices are cautionary because they contain about the same amount of sugar as soda.

"Orange juice has nutritional value, apple juice much less, so we recommend choosing orange over apple juice."

THE FUNCTIONALITY OF WATER AND HYDRATION FOR THE HUMAN BODY 1. Water Protects Your Tissues, Spinal Cord, and Joints: Water does more than just quench your thirst and regulate your body's temperature; it keeps the tissues in your body moist, according to the Mayo Clinic Health System. Do you know how it feels when your eyes, nose, or mouth gets dry? Keeping your body hydrated helps it retain optimum levels of moisture in these sensitive areas, as well as in the blood, bones, and brain. In addition, water helps protect the spinal cord, and it acts as a lubricant and cushion for your joints.

2. Water Helps Your Body Remove Waste: Adequate water intake enables your body to excrete waste through perspiration, urination, and defecation.

Water helps your kidneys remove waste from your blood and keep the blood vessels that run to your kidneys open and filter them out, according to the National Kidney Foundation. Water is also important for helping prevent constipation, points out the University of Rochester Medical Centre. However, as research notes, there is no evidence to prove that increasing your fluid intake will cure constipation.

Water helps your kidneys remove waste from your blood and keep the blood vessels that run to your kidneys open and filter them out, according to the National Kidney Foundation.

3. Water Aids in Digestion: Water is important for healthy digestion. As the Mayo Clinic explains, water helps break down the food you eat, allowing its nutrients to be absorbed by your body. After you drink, both your small and large intestines absorb water, which moves into your bloodstream and is also used to break down nutrients.

As your large intestine absorbs water, stool changes from liquid to solid, according to the National Institute for Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases. Water is also necessary to help you digest soluble fibre, as per MedlinePlus. With the help of water, this fibre turns to gel and slows digestion.

Water is also necessary to help you digest soluble fibre, as per MedlinePlus. With the help of water, this fibre turns to gel and slows digestion.

4. Water Prevents You From Becoming Dehydrated: Your body loses fluids when you engage in vigorous exercise, sweat in high heat, come down with a fever, or contract an illness that causes vomiting or diarrhoea, according to the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention. If you're losing fluids for any of these reasons, it's important to increase your fluid intake so that you can restore your body's natural hydration level.

Your doctor may also recommend that you drink more fluids to help treat other health conditions, like bladder infections and urinary tract stones. If you're pregnant or nursing, you may want to consult with your physician about your fluid intake because your body will be using more fluids than usual, especially if you're breastfeeding.

Your doctor may also recommend that you drink more fluids to help treat other health conditions, like bladder infections and urinary tract stones.

5. Water Helps Your Brain Function Optimally: Ever feel foggy-headed? Take a sip of water. Research shows that dehydration is a drag on memory, attention, and energy, according to a small study on | 28 |

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adult men from China published in June 2019 in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health. It’s no wonder, considering water makes up 75 percent of the brain, the authors point out.

One reason for that foggy-headed feeling? “Adequate electrolyte balance is vital to keeping your body functioning optimally. Low electrolytes can lead to issues including muscle weakness, fatigue, and confusion,” says Gabrielle Lyon, DO, a functional medicine physician in New York City.

6. Water Keeps Your Cardiovascular System Healthy:

7. Water Can Help You Eat Healthier: It may be plain, but it’s powerful. In a study of more than 18,300 American adults, people who drank just 1 percent more water a day ate fewer calories and less saturated fat, sugar, sodium, and cholesterol, according to a study published in February 2016 in the Journal of Human Nutrition and Dietetics.

Water may help fill you up, especially if you drink it before eating a meal, a notion that was backed up in a small study of 15 young, healthy participants that was published in October 2018 in Clinical Nutrition Research.

Water is a huge part of your blood. (For instance, plasma — the pale yellow liquid portion of your blood — is about 90 percent water, notes Britannica.)

If you become dehydrated, your blood becomes more concentrated, which can lead to an imbalance of the electrolyte minerals it contains (sodium and potassium, for example), says Susan Blum, MD, founder of the Blum Centre for Health in Rye Brook, New York.

These electrolytes are necessary for proper muscle and heart function. “Dehydration can also lead to lower blood volume, and thus blood pressure, so you may feel light-headed or woozy standing up,” she says.

“Dehydration can also lead to lower blood volume, and thus blood pressure, so you may feel lightheaded or woozy standing up,” THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Olukoya Olusegun Ajayi is the CEO of Silverback Lifestyle and Wellness Services, an avid fitness enthusiast and athlete who plays for EKO TRINITY of the Nigerian Rugby League, he is also the COO of Florence John Energy. Olukoya has an M.A in TV and Film Production from Sunderland University, United Kingdom and is a creative content writer, an aspiring Media Mogul; he is on a mission to ensure that the next generation of Nigerians adopt fitness in their everyday living.

Follow Segun on Instagram @Silverback_fitness9ja | 29 |

VITAMIN B-12 DEFICIENCY

diet- Vitamin B-12 deficiency. Around 74% of Indians are deficient in Vitamin B-12 (National Health Survey-5, 2020). Further, 50-55% of the population have a clinical deficiency of vitamin B-12 Despite such staggering statistics, there is a very little conversation happening around the subject.

Highlights: •

Vitamin B-12 plays many essential roles in the everyday functioning of our body.

•

Vitamin B-12 is a water-soluble vitamin.

•

The metabolism of every cell in the body depends on vitamin B-12.

Our body requires an array of micronutrients and macronutrients to function optimally. Vitamin B-12 is a water-soluble vitamin that plays many essential roles in the everyday functioning of our body. If your body is not getting adequate amounts of B12, it could lead to some serious consequences. Most people do not notice the deficiency as it takes years to develop. This means that you might struggle to notice the immediate changes. It is absolutely essential that you spot the condition as early as possible, as it can lead to some unwanted complications. Some people may go on to develop cognitive decline, nervous system damage, and even anaemia.

Most people do not notice the deficiency as it takes years to develop. This means that you might struggle to notice the immediate changes.

For example, though the Indian diet is considered highly nutritious, there are still common deficiencies among people due to a variety of reasons. While iron, vitamin D, vitamin A and iodine deficiencies are commonly spoken about, there is an often overlooked but nonetheless, persistent deficiency in the Indian

What is Vitamin B-12 Vitamin B-12 is a water-soluble vitamin that, unfortunately, is not made by the body. This vitamin is crucial for brain health, nerve tissue health, and the formation of red blood cells. The metabolism of every cell in the body depends on vitamin B-12, as it plays a part in the synthesis of fatty acids and energy production. Vitamin B-12 maintains energy levels by helping the body absorb folic acid.

Vitamin B12 helps improving energy levels.

Role of Vitamin B-12: •

Helps the formation of red blood cells

•

Improves energy levels

•

Improves athletic performance

•

Improves cognitive capacity and prevents brain damage

•

Reduces depression

•

Maintains eye health

•

Improves heart health by reducing homocysteine levels

•

Supports healthy skin, hair and nails

•

May prevent birth defects | 30 |

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Signs and Symptoms of B12 Deficiency One of the most common warning signs of a vitamin B12 deficiency is having unusually pale or yellow skin.

Further, low levels of B-12 in the diet initially show up as fatigue, depression, memory problems and confusion. Other symptoms include constipation and loss of appetite. Severe symptoms of persisting deficiencies include numbness in hands and legs, tingling sensations, anaemia, and even nerve damage.

It is hence extremely important to have an adequate intake of B-12 in the diet.

Vitamin B12 deficiency symptoms include constipation and loss of appetite.

Evidently, there is a pressing need for a solution that can provide RDA of vitamin B-12 in any diet. It is very important to pick the right sources of the vitamin, and include them adequately in your diet. A good daily dose of Vitamin B-12 is a must!

Sources of Vitamin B-12 Vitamin B-12 is found only in animal-based sources.

This includes meat, fish, eggs, and dairy products, to some extent. This makes it difficult for vegetarians to meet the daily requirement of the vitamin, especially for vegans. While there are supplements available in the market, they are not without side effects. Plus, there are very few vegan supplements available.

Supplements can be Injections, oral or sublingual. Few common side effects of these supplements are gastric discomfort, bloating, feeling of fullness, etc.

Vitamin B12 is found in meat, fish, eggs, and dairy products.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Mrs. O.O Ajayi is the MD of Florencejohn Health affiliated to Narayana Health India. A highly experienced Nursing Professional with over 35 years working experience.

She previously worked in the medical unit of a reputable Oil and Gas company for 31 years with quality experience as a Senior Nursing Sister in all aspects of Nursing Care Units. | 31 |

HEALTHY LIFESTYLE: THE KEY TO A STRESS FREE LIFE

RISK FACTORS FOR SUDDEN BUT AVOIDABLE CARDIO-METABOLIC DEATH Risk factors for sudden cardio-metabolic death could be classified into Physical or Biochemical risk factors.

INTRODUCTION Growing old is good and inevitable. In order to stay healthy and live a long and stress-free life, we must embark on a voyage of lifestyle changes and do things in moderation.

Those under 40 years may indulge and abuse their body but Mother Nature has a way of smiling on the abused body and restores it to normal. After 40 years what will likely kill someone aside from violent traumatic deaths from Road Traffic Accident will be known to you and will be staring you on the face.

On turning 50, things suddenly begin to turn against you and even Mother Nature will seem to desert you.

Mortality from Non-communicable diseases begin to rise and that is why it is called middle age crisis. You have entered a tunnel at birth.

The Physical risk factors include the affluence lifestyle, middle age (41-64), obesity with BMI above 25, family history of heart disease, Diabetes Mellitus, Hypertension, those who smoke more than 2 sticks of cigarette per day, drink more than 2 pints of beer per day or take more than 2 teaspoonful of salt per day in food or 2 cubes of sugar per day in their tea or previous history of myocardial infarction.

Also included in the risk factors are those with BP persistently above 160/90mmHg, evidence of Left ventricular enlargement or cardiac enlargement, arrhythmias, ischaemic changes by ECG or Echocardiogram. The Biochemical risk factors are, fasting blood glucose greater than 120mg/dl, serum uric acid greater than 4mg/dl and hypercholerolaemia (Total Cholestrolemia greater than 180mg/dl, with high LDL, high triglycerides and low HDL).

PREVENTION OF SUDDEN CARDIAC DEATH

Behind you is the good and at times abusive life you had lived as a youth. In front lies the inevitable call to death. None gets out of that tunnel alive but one can manage his life to live healthy life well into old age if you listen to and pay attention to your bodies until you cross to the other end.

Most of the cases of sudden death that occur among us are due to ignored or rejected pre-existing medical conditions. These health changes in the middle age are mainly due to the genetic code you are born with and the lifestyle behaviour you chose to adopt.

Out of 48 million deaths per year worldwide, Over 12million deaths (a quarter of all deaths) per year worldwide is from heart disease.

Prevention of Sudden Cardiac Death involves the identification and removal of risk factors. The following should be carried out for those without any cardio-metabolic illness: •

ECG screening at least once a year.

•

Regular BP check every 3 months.

•

Check your Fasting blood sugar and cholesterol every 6 months.

Limit salt intake-Do not add extra to your meal.

Control weight-Ask for your BMI. BMI>25 =overweight ;> 40 =morbid obesity.

Eat balanced diet-Eat adequate fish, vegetables and white meat e.g. chicken with the skin peeled off.

Avoid refined sugar, red meat, fatty meals and excessive alcohol.

• • •

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•

•

Carry out all the tests during annual medical test (ECG, Blood sugar, Urinalysis, Chest x-ray, Stool analysis and Full blood count).

Keep your hospital appointment regularly.

COMPULSORY TESTS- AT FORTY PLUS FEMALE: Regular mammogram for breast cancer and PAP smear for cervical cancer.

MALE: PSA (Prostatic Specific Antigen) for prostate cancer.

FOR ALL: • Liver function…once a year.

• Kidney function once a year.

• Eye test to exclude long sight, Glacacuoma Once a year.

• See your dentist twice a year.

AT 50 PLUS a. Colonoscopy once in 2 years…To exclude colonic cancer. b. If you start hearing strange voices in your head or you feel overwhelmed with sadness, you feel you are in dark places all the time then it is time to talk to the psychiatrist or psychologist.

DIETARY REQUIREMENT Healthy eating is one of the best things you can do to prevent and control health problems such as heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, obesity and some cancers. In choosing weight loss program it is wise to pick one that will meet your needs and give you long term success and it is always good to focus on steady weight loss about 1-2 pounds a week.

THE KING, PRINCE AND PAUPER (KPP) DIET REGIME In the KPP Diet regime, the food table is made of fruits and vegetables (50%), with the rest made up of protein, carbohydrate with less of fat. Eat like a King in the morning breakfast which should be between 6am and 8am.

DASH (DIETARY APPROACHES TO STOP HYPERTENSION) AND MEDITERRANEAN DIET • Both diets tied as the healthiest diet in the ranking.

• Both offer guiding principles for eating, such as having more fruits and vegetables, as well as whole grains, fish, legumes, nuts and –fat dairy foods.

• A daily glass of red wine is encouraged as part of the Mediterranean diet.

EXERCISE REGULARLY UNDER DOCTOR’S SUPERVISION Countless studies have shown that this offers many physical and mental benefits. Not only does regular exercise help reduce stress, it reduces blood pressure by 5-10 mmHg, reduces weight, improves circulation, but it also boosts your mood, improves your overall health, and enhances your quality of life. Aerobic exercise such as jogging, brisk walk for 30-60 minutes, skipping, swimming for 3-5 times a week is necessary Stop Smoking! Cigarette smoking is associated with increased BP, Coronary artery disease (heart attack), Peptic ulcer disease, Stomach ulcer, Laryngitis and Lung cancer WATER Drink minimum of 3 liters of water a day for optimum kidney excretory function.

CONCLUSION We are encouraged to practice healthy lifestyle by doing things in moderation and having time for regular health checks. Our diet should consist of 50% fruits and vegetables. Aerobic exercise 30 to 60 minutes for 3 to 5 times a week and adequate sleep of minimum of 6 hours should be a way of life. The Key to healthy living is selfdiscipline.

A King has all he needs but just picks his food: for example he may have a cup of coffee/tea, one boiled egg, two slices of bread and assorted fruits and vegetables.

Eat like a Prince in the Lunch time which should be between 12noon and 4pm.

A Prince feeds well because his father has provided all he needs. This is the time, between 12noon and 4pm, to eat the heavy meals like pasta, rice or semolina with plenty soup with fish or some little piece of white meat. Red meat should be avoided or taken sparingly.

It is important that you remember that 50% of the food should be vegetable and fruits. Eat like a Pauper at Dinner time which should be between 6pm and 8pm.

This should be light meals like Pap, oatmeal, tea and biscuits, two big spoons of beans or rice, 2-4 pieces of boiled yam or plantain with vegetables and fruits.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Dr. AE Life AJEMBA is a retired Major General of the Nigerian Army Medical Corps and a Chief Consultant Physician and Cardiologist. He was formerly the Director-General, Ministry of Defence Health Implementation Program Abuja and currently the Chief of Medicine, Defence Medical Center Abuja. He trained at the University of Nigeria Teaching Hospital Enugu, University College Hospital Ibadan and King’s College Hospital London. He has authored and published 5 medical textbooks and many journals and he is a regular Speaker at the International Conference on Disaster and Military Medicine, Dusseldorf Germany. | 33 |

SPECIAL FEATURES

Step 3: Create a to-do list—a list like this helps you map out all that you need to accomplish for the day.

It brings to your remembrance important zoom meetings, project timelines/deadlines, and the likes.

A to-do list sets the tone of your working hours; it helps keep you in check as the day goes along, so you are not running around like a chicken with their head cut off.

Step 1: Have a pre-work routine—you cannot roll out of bed and into your office chair, you have to give your mind a little time to reboot. For me, I begin my day by reading the Bible and praying.

Then I set out to carry out some chores around the house, eat some fruits, do some squats, take a shower, have breakfast, then go to my designated work area.

By the time I am done with my pre-work routine, my mind is usually clear enough to begin my day at work.

Step 2: Be on-time—when I was still with my previous company, work usually began at 9 am. As such, I had to be done with my routine on time to resume work.

What that did was help me maintain a level of responsibility and not take advantage of the situation, since no one could see me.

Although sometimes, I let things slide (just being honest here) because life happens. However, if you maintain a good habit of resuming work on time, that will reduce your stress levels by the end of the day, because you would have covered a lot of grounds before the close of work.

However, if you maintain a good habit of resuming work on time, that will reduce your stress levels by the end of the day, because you would have covered a lot of grounds before the close of work.

Step 4: Communicate with your co-workers—just because you are working from home doesn’t mean that you are excluded from the team. Engage with them; if you are working on a team project, let your team know how the project is coming along, and if you need their help, don’t hesitate to ask for it. Communicating frequently fosters closeness, understanding, and possibly friendships in the workspace, and this shouldn’t be lost while working from home.

Communicating frequently fosters closeness, understanding, and possibly friendships in the workspace, and this shouldn’t be lost while working from home.

Step 5: Have help available—if you are a working mother who works from home, you still need help with your young kids. Don’t think for a second that because you are home with them then you can wing it. You can’t.

This is because they can pose a distraction to you while you are neck-deep on a critical project during the day, hence, leaving you unproductive.

Consider the use of creches or babysitters. This can be a family member, hired help, or a neighbour, you need someone to step in and fill your shoes, while you are busy working during the day.

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Step 6: Have a designated work area—this is also important because it fosters productivity. If you are in a space in your house or apartment where you can get easily distracted, then you will be unable to achieve your goals for the day.

A designated work area creates a strict divide between your work life and home life. Keeping separate areas for work and play enhances your mood and increases productivity.

Step 7: Do not be afraid to take breaks—while working from home, there are times when I feel exhausted or fatigued, and even sleepy. Rather than continuing to push myself at the moment, I take breaks to walk around my neighbourhood, drink loads of water, eat, or take a power-nap if the occasion demands it.

Step 8: Don’t beat yourself up—it is okay if you don’t have a checkmark at the end of every point listed on your to-do list for a day. Allow yourself to revisit it next time. It is better that you focus on one thing and do it exceptionally well than to go through everything haphazardly.

There has been adjustments that had to happen post COVID and working from home has been at the forefront. Rather than make it a chore that you detest, why not allow it to be an experience of a lifetime, enjoying all its perks while it lasts?

Your body needs some in-between time to rejuvenate.

Do not ignore it. I discovered that whenever I returned from my walks, I felt more energized to carry on; compared to if I continued pushing myself to keep going.

A designated work area creates a strict divide between your work life and home life. Keeping separate areas for work and play enhances your mood and increases productivity.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Evi Idoghor is a Christian, writer, content creator, and a graduate of Chemical Engineering from the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. Consumed by her love for writing and desire to effect change, she launched her online platform in 2018 to tap into her creativity and start meaningful conversations with one goal in mind— to redefine status quo. In addition to that, she has worked and partnered with writing agencies and individuals to bring their stories to life. To learn more about her and the content she creates, visit www.letstalknationblog.com | 36 |

I BECAME HER

Overstretched matters, often resolved yet constantly resurfacing We endured long-drawn cycles of outbursts and truces There were words of scorn that left scars Scars, we hastily covered with heartfelt apologies But words don't suffice all the time, as we soon found out As they blew up in our faces like unmarked mines

The fruit of our passion, once so sweet Now sour grapes, they are the source of our gripe Daggers drawn, we war with no end Gnawing away each passing day at the lines we should never cross

What happened to me?

My heart has stopped beating It's cold and listless All that's left are a pair of puffy dark circles staring back at me This is not me Where did I go?

How did I become her?

Those we never thought possible have become us Our trials by fire disguised as respectable silence Our differences began as tiny sparks of difference Unknown to us, we shooed them away with a wave of indifference Now, they stand tall like cathedrals of tension It crept in subtly This much I can say In it all, I became her You became a distance And now, we have become things, we never thought possible!

Words spoken harshly over time Became the stones that shattered our sacred mosaic Thrown over and over again They tore through us like shrapnel Reaping apart the veins that gave us life Now, we are drenched in blood There is nothing left Racked by rigor, we lay bare and limp

Harsh words spoken over time Became heaps of stones A wall of apathy, a defence of some sort Decorated with reasons that fortify our stance We wrestled fiercely in the mud of words Sinking deeper and deeper with no end in sight

This is not me Where did I go?

How did I become her?

I honestly don't know This much, I can simply say It crept in subtly Like binary opinions like Venus and Mars We took positions, each deemed correct in our eyes

Ibinabo Enebi is a pathfinder dedicated to the proposition that our life stories and expertise are not just ours, but should be content enough to share. A journalist by training, and a poet by design, she creates content that helps people make better choices in their lives.

Through her platforms (Ibinabo Enebi, a blogging website, and Ibi Speaks showing on her YouTube Channel @IbinaboEnebi), she features experts, thought leaders, and everyday people with nuanced perspectives on various life issues. Her philosophy is: "Our experienced-expertise should serve as survival kits for those travelling on life’s unwinding road." | 37 |

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WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I wonder where the years went The years of innocence with little worries The days have gone Moments have flashed past I have grown older Oh! How I thought I could shape the ‘’tomorrow’’ then.

I used to think I could achieve anything I put my mind to Life seemed so easy like it was in cartoons Dreams were conceived and plans hatched Most of which have become wishful thinking as I have come to realise I remember with nostalgia The times I was younger When life wasn’t as hard or so I thought Now I am here wondering why I grew up What really is the incentive for growing older?

Responsibilities, bills and societal expectations These have successfully taken away the joy of ‘’adulting’’ Oh! If I could turn back the hands of time To days when I was younger When my troubles were fewer And friends truer

Oladipupo Ojo (diplenty) is a Private Wealth Manager with over 10 years banking experience in Lagos. He writes poems as a hobby and says it is a way of expressing his thoughts when there is no one to talk to …

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

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the rehoboth dream solid foundation board of trustees Rear Admiral Oladeinde (‘Deinde) Olusoga Joseph was born at AraMoko, Ekiti State into the humble family of late Mr. Joseph Owolabi and late Mrs. Ajibabi Owolabi on the 9th of May 1948.

He enlisted into the Nigerian Navy in July 1967 and later graduated from the Nigerian Defence Academy Kaduna and was commissioned as a Sub -Lieutenant in July 1971 in India. He received professional training as a naval officer in India, United Kingdom and the United States of America. Rear Admiral Joseph is a graduate of the Nigeria Command and Staff College Jaji and the prestigious National Institute for Policy and Strategic Studies Kuru.

As a professional naval officer, he went through all the ranks in the Navy until he was promoted to the full Rear Admiral rank in 1998. While in the Navy, he had 4 sea commands, which included that of NNS Aradu (the Navy’s flag ship), 2 Training bases and 2 Operational bases. He had 2 tours at Jaji Staff College as Chief Instructor and Director of the Naval Faculty. He was also the Military Governor of Ogun State between 1990 and 1992. His last job was Chief of Navy Personnel at Naval Headquarters until he retired in June 1999.

Married to Mrs. Katherine Lolade Joseph since April 1975, Rear Admiral ‘Deinde Joseph is blessed with 3 children; Toyin (now Mrs. Borisade), and the boys Seyi and Jide, all University graduates.

His hobbies are photography, reading and he is a handicap 9 golfer. A practicing Christian of Methodist Church of the Trinity, Tinubu since 1967, he has a passion to help the less privileged in the society. Rear Admiral Joseph is a recipient of the National Honour of the Commander of the Order Of the Niger (CON), and brings his experience and goodwill to the Foundation as the Chairman, Board of Trustees of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Ms. Ketumi Alasa studied Computer Science in the then Sheffield City Polytechnic now known as Hallam University, Sheffield, England. Worked in various capacities as an IT professional in leading multinational Oil and Gas, Insurance and Iron and Steel companies in Nigeria for 28 years cumulatively.

After a successful and rewarding career in the corporate arena, she took an early retirement and launched out to fulfil her entrepreneurial dream in real estate and retail management. As a real estate entrepreneur, she has made remarkable progress in development and management of properties. On the retail front, she runs a chain of interior decoration shops.

She is a practicing licensed Canadian Immigration Consultant and a certified Canadian Education Consultant and Foreign Student Recruiter for Canadian schools.

She is the CEO of Canada Outreach Immigration and Academic Consultancy, Managing Director of J-Three Sixteen Associates and Managing Director of Kay Kay Enterprise Interiors. She also serves on the Boards of a couple of christian and philanthropic organizations.

Blessed with five children, she enjoys playing the game of Golf. She served as a Lady Captain of IBB Golf and Country Club.

She is a Christian with a deep passion and commitment to supporting Missions work and the under privileged. Ms Ketumi Alasa is also a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

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Deacon Samson Madu Igbokwe is a 1983 B.Pharm Graduate of Pharmacy from the former University of Ife (Unife), now known as Obafemi Awolowo University (OAU). In addition, he gained a Masters in Business Administration Degree (MBA) from the University of Lagos (Unilag) in 2000. He also acquired a Certificate of Proficiency in Information Systems Management (CPISM).

Shortly after his Youth Service Corp at Military Hospital Lagos, he set up his own pharmacy business at S.W. Ikoyi, Lagos in 1985 which he has been running as Chairman/Managing Director till date. This is a company that supplies and distributes pharmaceuticals to its community and hospitals in Lagos State.

A devout and practicing Christian, he gave his life to Christ on March 31, 1991 in The Redeemed Evangelical Mission (TREM), Akoka. Since then, he has served in various capacities in TREM as House Fellowship Centre Leader, Zonal Leader, Assistant Area Co-coordinator and Financial Secretary/Treasurer of Caleb Group of the Christian Men Fellowship.

He is currently serving as the Chairman Hospital Visitation Ministry in TREM. He is a member of Pharmaceutical Society of Nigeria (PSN) and a Treasurer at Ikoyi Pharmacy Community Zone. He has passion for contributing to his community, and often assists in reaching out to orphans, the fatherless and widows in the community.

Periodically, he visits in a group and prays for the sick in hospitals in Lagos, ministering to their spiritual, physical and material needs. He is happily married to his amiable wife Mrs. Roseline Igbokwe and they have 5 children. Deacon Samson Igbokwe is a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Deaconess Roseline Igbokwe was born on November 2, 1965 in Ikoyi, Lagos, and is married to Pharmacist Samson M. Igbokwe.

She is an alumna of Sikkim Manipal University (SMU), Gangtok, India and the University of Lagos (UNILAG); Bsc. in Applied Information Technology, Business Administration and Masters in Business Administration(MBA) from the same institution.

She holds a Certificate of Proficiency in Information Systems Management (CPISM), Advanced Diploma in Systems Engineering (ADSE), Certificate in Strategies for Managing and Collecting Data (LBS) and Certificate in Core Sales Skills (LCT). She worked with Texaco Nigeria Plc as well as Chevron Oil Nigeria Plc as Food Mart Supervisor, Senior Retail Business Consultant, South, and then MRS Oil Nigeria Plc as District Sales Manager, Southwest Nigeria, Credit Control Manager for Nigeria, Aviation Commercial, Retail Sales Manager for Southeast/Southwest Nigeria and Head, Sales & Marketing. Nigeria.

A hard worker with enthusiasm for excellence, in 2006 she won the ‘African Pakistan Global Downstream 2006 Cultural Award, of Customer Facing and Market Focused’ in Chevron, having executed superior and consistent execution and sales implementation of all programs, processes and systems. She had focused the department’s organization around achieving the best business financial targets through an agreed set of Profit & Loss control measures in all MRS Oil Nigeria Plc service stations in Nigeria.

She is an ordained minister with The Redeemed Evangelical Mission (TREM): and at various times has held the following positions: Assistant Secretary, Young Women Fellowship; Assistant Secretary, Christian Women Fellowship and Chairman Disciplinary Committee of the Evangel Voices Choir and Team Lead with the Christian Women Fellowship. Deaconess Roseline Igbokwe is also a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation. She is blessed with (5) five children.

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

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Pastor (Dr.) Joshua Gbadebo Opadiya is the Senior Pastor of Every Nation Church Sydney, Australia, a worldwide family of churches and ministries.

He is currently serving as the Hub Leader of the Oceania (Australia, New Zealand, Papa New Guinea and Fiji) overseeing the ‘Every Nation churches and ministries in the Oceania region.

Pastor (Dr.) Opadiya previously lectured in the Lagos State University, Nigeria for 6 years, before moving with his family to Innsbruck in Austria where he lived for almost 6 years. Thereafter, the family moved to Sydney Australia in 1999 where together with his wife, Dr. Mrs. Opadiya started the ‘Every Nation Church.

He received his bachelor’s and master’s degrees from the reputable University of Ibadan in Nigeria and holds a doctorate degree in Ecotoxicology from the Technical University, Innsbruck, Austria.

Pastor (Dr.) Opadiya has a burden to raise godly leaders and see the nations return to Jesus Christ.

He has travelled and ministered in several nations worldwide.

Pastor (Dr.) Opadiya's passion is to connect with young adults and adults alike who are leaders, peacemakers and bridge builders in their colleges, universities and in their communities. His life has been dedicated to this cause, reaching out, equipping, counseling and mentoring. He is also the dean of Every Nation Leadership Institute, a part-time program that is purposefully designed to provide discipleship training and biblical teaching for people from all walks of life. Pastor (Dr.) Opadiya and his wife have been married for 31 years. They are blessed with children. He is a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Dr. (Mrs.) Yinka Opadiya is a senior pastor with Every Nation Churches and Ministries. Alongside her husband Pastor (Dr) Joshua Opadiya, she oversees the multi-congregational Church organization in Sydney, Australia – a church with members from diverse cultures, age groups and professions.

She is a teacher and motivational speaker with a passion for teaching about God's love and His purpose for humanity. She is also passionate about women and youth ministry; and is committed to mentoring women and young girls.

Her heart-cry is to see ‘the Church’ respond to the Great Commission of ‘making disciples’ and transforming nations. A graduate of the prestigious Universities of Ife and Ibadan in Nigeria, she also holds a Doctorate degree in French (Women Literature) from the University of Innsbruck in Austria. She had worked as a French Lecturer in the Lagos State University and in various schools in Sydney Australia. Dr. (Mrs.) Yinka Opadiya been married for 31 years. They are blessed with children. She is a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Mrs. Ronke Osikoya holds a law degree (LLB) from the University of Lagos and an MBA (1988) from the same University. She is a Certified Trainer for the Commonwealth Association on Corporate Governance and has facilitated on the Directors course on Corporate Governance. She is a Management Consultant that co-runs a management consulting firm, Pedion Partnership Limited.

Her values are strongly shaped by her Christian faith and she believes very passionately in supporting the under-privileged, particularly children, which accounts for her involvement with the Foundation.

Mrs. Osikoya is a Trustee of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation and lives with her husband and 2 sons in Lagos, Nigeria.

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Mrs. Abimbola Komolafe is a devout Christian who was ordained as a Deaconess of the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) in the year 2000 and as an Assistant Pastor in August 2013. She served as a Coordinator in the Teens ministry of the Resurrection Parish of the RCCG in Lagos where her passion for supporting the education of the less privileged was birthed .

She is a Chartered Accountant and Chartered Banker and is a Fellow of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN) and a Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Bankers of Nigeria. Mrs. Bimbo Komolafe has taken various management, Leadership and professional courses, within and outside Nigeria and is an Alumna of the Lagos Business School. She worked for 9 years in a reputable Merchant Bank in Nigeria and thereafter worked for 20 years with one of the leading Oil and Gas companies in Nigeria. She currently works as a Principal Consultant for Threshold of Trust Nigeria Limited.

Married to Rear Admiral Kehinde Komolafe (Rtd) who is also an Ordained Pastor of the RCCG Nigeria, they are blessed with 3 children. Together with her husband, they are committed to providing financial support to as many less privileged students as they can accommodate. Mrs Bimbo Komolafe is the founder and Executive Secretary of the Rehoboth Dream Solid Foundation.

Rear Admiral Kehinde Komolafe (Rtd), is a highly revered and distinguished military officer who served meritoriously with impeccable records in the Nigerian Navy. He graduated from the Nigerian Defence Academy in 1980 and was commissioned as a Naval Officer a year after. Due to his quest for knowledge and passion for competence, he proceeded to study at the University of Nigeria, Nsukka where he graduated in 1985 with a B.Sc. Degree in Accountancy. He attended several courses nationally and overseas and witnessed consistent career growth during his active years in the military.

Rear Admiral Komolafe is a change agent with a commitment to providing transformational leadership and ensuring realignment of processes, operations, resource and people on various integrated fronts for optimum value creation. He held various sensitive positions in the Navy before his voluntarily retirement from the Service after 35 years of meritorious service. He presently sits on the Board of many prestigious organizations. Beyond his Military career, Rear Admiral Kehinde Komolafe (Rtd.) is a lover of God and a Pastor. He is married to Mrs. Abimbola Komolafe and they are blessed with 3 children.

Charity to the less priviledged

Skills Acquisition programmes

THINKING ALOUD | JAN - MAR 2022

Raise funds for the needy

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Supporting the poor

We appreciate every support over the years and your continued support and commitment that has made it possible for us to continue to provide succor to the less privileged in our society. We pray that God will bless you and grant you success in all your endeavors.

Donations: You can make your donations online at: https://www.rehobothdreamsolidfoundation.org/donations