Living Messy: The Art of Building Community

ROBERT MERLO

In the age of curated Instagram feeds and meticulously crafted personal brands, there’s a growing sense of longing for the authentic, the real, and the unfiltered. It’s the messy and unscripted moments of life that resonate most deeply with us, reminding us of our shared humanity. As we strive for perfection, there’s something profoundly liberating about embracing imperfection, both in ourselves and in our communities. To ‘live messy’ is to build communities that thrive on shared experiences, where individuals come together, support one another, and learn and grow as a collective. In this essay, we will explore the art of ‘living messy’ by building community, celebrating the beauty in our flaws and forging connections that defy the boundaries of curated perfection.

The Allure of the Messy

The allure of the messy lies in its unpredictability, its rawness, and its ability to draw people together. It is in these imperfections that we find solace, authenticity, and an opportunity for genuine human connection. The sterile landscapes of social media can be beautifully crafted, but they often lack the depth and substance of a life lived fully, replete with trials and tribulations. Living messy, in the context of building community, means embracing these imperfections as opportunities rather than failures.

Shared Experiences: The Glue That Binds

A community built on the principles of living messy finds its strength in shared experiences. These experiences, be they moments of joy, sadness, or struggle, are the threads that weave the fabric of a community. They create empathy, understanding, and a profound sense of belonging. When we acknowledge our shared humanity, we create a space where we can relate to one another, even when our stories differ. Shared experiences remind us that we are not alone in our messiness.

Supporting One Another

Building a messy community is not merely about celebrating the chaos; it’s also about offering a supportive hand when needed. The essence of this support lies in its sincerity and absence of judgment. When we extend kindness and empathy, we allow for vulnerability, and that is where true connection occurs. In these communities, individuals lift one another up, not in spite of their flaws, but because of them.

Learning and Growing Together

Living messy by building community is an ongoing journey. It’s about learning from our collective experiences and growing together as individuals and as a group. It’s recognizing that, in the messiness of life, there are valuable lessons and

opportunities for personal development. It is within this mess that we discover our resilience, adaptability, and the beauty of transformation.

The Unspoken Benefits of Living Messy

The benefits of ‘living messy’ by building community go beyond the individuals involved. In an age of heightened divisiveness and isolation, these communities have the power to bridge divides and foster understanding. They become the microcosms of a better world, where diversity is not a source of discord but a wellspring of enrichment. In embracing the messy, we embrace the richness of the human experience.

Conclusion: The Art of Embracing Messiness

In a world that often values the polished over the authentic, there is an undeniable longing for something more genuine. The art of ‘living messy’ by building community offers us a path to embrace the beauty in imperfection, to cherish shared experiences, to support one another unconditionally, and to continually learn and grow. It is an art that celebrates our humanity and, in doing so, enriches our lives in ways that perfection and isolation never can.

In the grand tapestry of life, it is the messy threads that make the most captivating and enduring stories. These are the stories that connect us, inspire us, and remind us that life is not a series of picture-perfect moments but a vibrant mosaic of emotions, experiences, and connections. To ‘live messy’ is to truly live and to build communities that resonate with the very essence of our shared humanity. In doing so, we discover that imperfection is not a blemish; it is the brushstroke that completes the masterpiece.

A graduate of the University of Rochester and the Charles H. Lundquist College of Business at the University of Oregon, Robert Merlo is employed in the Ed Tech Industry. He lives in Rochester, New York with his wife, a 3rd-grade teacher, and their 13-year-old daughter. Find out more about Robert on Linked In.