The Chic Savant November December 2023 Issue

Photo by Eugenia Porechenskaya

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What Do the Lonely Do at Christmas?

Rhonda C. Hight, RCC

The holiday season is upon us and for many it is a

My immediate family consists of my son

festive and happy time. The time of year when we

and grandson, and my sister’s children and

spend quality time with family, engage in holiday

grandchildren. I love them all, but it is a

activities, shop till we drop, and perhaps get

responsibility that feels especially heavy

dressed up in our finest attire for a holiday party.

during the holidays. Being single means

For others, it is one of the most difficult times of

that I often attend holiday gatherings alone

the year.

and return to an empty house; or skip them

According to a study done by the National Alliance

altogether because witnessing the love

on Mental Health (NAMH); approximately 755 of

shared by other couples or families, makes

overall respondents reported that the holidays

me sad and reminds of me of all of the

contribute to feeling sad or dissatisfied and 68%

loved ones I’ve lost.

financially strained. 66% have experienced

While circumstances may differ, I’m not the

loneliness, 63% too much pressure and 57%

only one that struggles with the “holiday

unrealistic expectations. 55% found themselves

blues.” However, I have learned that being

remembering happier times in the past contrasting

lonely and sad during the holiday season is

with the present, while 50% were unable to be with

a choice. I would like to share a few things

loved ones.

that I’ve begun doing that help me get

I can relate to having felt all of these things at

through the holiday season, and hope that

some time or another. In part because I am

they will bless you, or someone you know

divorced and currently single, and all of my elders

that feels Bah Humbug during this time of

and siblings are no longer here with me. By

year.

default, of birth order, I am a matriarch.

Set guidelines for gift-giving: Don’t feel obligated to buy gifts for everyone, or to spend money that you need, or could use for other things. I only buy gifts for the children [in my family] that are 14-years old and under. I do not spend more than $15 on a gift for each child. It

still adds up, but it is more user-friendly on my wallet; and minimizes some of the stress and financial pressure the season can bring.\ Take a trip: The first year I “ran away from home” during the holidays, was one of the best holiday seasons I’ve ever had. The first trip, I spent in my hometown visiting my cousins, and hanging out with friends while checking out new restaurants and activities in the city. The next

To keep the costs low, make it a potluck

year, I took a solo vacation to Grand Bahama

event, where each guest brings an item to

Island, and that trip fed my soul, and filled me with so much joy. I felt renewed at the end of the trip, and that feeling remained throughout the rest of the holiday season. Dust off your passport or fill your gas tank up and take off! You can find

share. Google DIY holiday games that you can play and keep the number of guests to a minimum-this makes the event more intimate and meaningful.

budget-friendly packages on several online travel Develop a Honey-Do List for Yourself:

sites.

Now is a good time to start crossing some of

Plan a gathering with friends: Often in the absence of family, our friends become family. I

procrastinated about), off of your to-do-list. I

am blessed with a tribe of wonderful people.

Each holiday season one of us plans some type

like to take on some type of DIY project; purge my closets and prepare bags of

of gathering to celebrate the season. Nothing

major or over the top because it’s more about the fellowship with people you care about and that care about you.

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the projects you’ve put on hold (or just plain

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clothes and household items to give to my favorite charities.

I also experiment with new recipes, especially desserts that I can share with my mail carrier, friends, and neighbors during the season. Completing items on your list will leave less time to ruminate on the things that would normally fill you with holiday blues, and have you feeling super productive!

Make the holidays work for you. Do not get caught up in traditions. According to NAMH, “If holidays were a special time in the past and you try to recreate a time long gone, you are setting yourself up for sadness.” Create a new normal for yourself, and you will soon be Fa-la-la-la-la-ing through the holiday season!

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Paying Tribute to America’s Female Veterans

by Sandra Wright, PhD Women veteran’s have served in the military service since the Revolutionary War and continue to serve with honor today.

Since Veteran’s Day is in the month of November, we are highlighting one our female veterans, Ms. Lucreatia Meadows.

As we talk with Lucretia, fondly known as Lou, you will hear her story!

She is originally from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and moved to Georgia later in life.

There were just things that kids didn’t get close to; not like today. It took a lot to get used to getting up early in the morning to a lot of yelling and commands, but then it became necessary to take the street girl and make her a fighting machine.

She served in the military for 10 years active duty--Air Force and then another five years in the Air Force Reserves. Lucretia got married while in the military in 1988.

Did you imagine military life would be the way that it was? Because the mission of the USAF is primarily support, it wasn’t so bad getting used to being away from home and settling into a job serving our country on a military installation, just like outside of the installation. I made a lot of comrades, friends, and sisters-in-arms who I can still call on today if needed!

Her basic training was at Lackland AFB in San Antonio, Texas. She went on to obtain technical training at Shepphard Air Force Base in Wichita, Kansas. Lucretia’s first duty assignment was Carswell AFB in Fort Worth, Texas. Other assignments included, Bitburg AFB in Bitburg, Germany, Ramstein AFB in Kaiserslautern, Germany.

Here is my interview with Lucreatia Meadows:

Can you describe a funny moment in boot camp? Nothing specifically sticks out as funny, but I will tell you that it was a Happy Day when basic training was over and off to our tech school! That gave us a little more freedom in our day. It wasn’t such a strict environment but a lot of technical training and learning your job.

Why did you enlist in the military Lucreatia? My primary reason for enlisting in the military was to get out of my hometown, there were a lot of negative things happening and I didn’t want to get caught up. The other reason I enlisted was to honor the memory of my favorite uncle Abe.

Was there any discrimination because you were a woman or a black woman? I did have an airmen that I was assigned to train, and he emphatically told me that “he was not going to take any directions from a woman’. I advised my superiors, and he was removed from the military for insubordination.

What was basic training like? For me, it wasn’t so bad because of the discipline I received as a child.

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Wow! That really is something else. I’m not sure what I would have done in that situation, however, I am quite sure it still happens today.

Ms. Meadows went on to say that she was never deployed during any wartime while she was enlisted in the Air Force.

Have you ever served with a person you remember fondly? Not so fondly?

On the ‘not so fondly’ side, there was a male that I dated who didn’t make the best decision when he decided to slap me during an argument, and he was charged with battery and removed from the military. On the ‘Fond’ side, I have many awesome and exciting memories of my sister friends who I shared my love of music and travel with. I was blessed to be able to perform in the ‘United States Air Forces in Europe’ talent’ team. We traveled throughout Europe on US military bases performing for the troops and their families. We traveled all over Germany, England, Holland, Norway, Turkey, Greece, Italy, Spain as part of our peace time mission, encouraging other military families and providing them entertainment.

Do you keep in touch with anyone that you served with in the military? I am in constant contact with my military friends via phone, cards, and social media.

Did you ever break any of the rules while in the military? Let’s just say that I thank God for His grace and His mercy!

LOL! It seems you really had some things that were going on while in the military!

When did you leave the military? I was honorably discharged from the Air Force in January 1982 and Honorably Discharged from the Air Force Reserves in March of 1997.

Was there anyone that helped you during your transition back to civilian life from the military? My dearest friend and brother, ‘the late Eric Jackson’, of Detroit, Michigan reached out to me before I transitioned from Germany back to the US and I moved to Arlington, Texas in January 1992.

Were you able to get a decent job once you returned from the military? God has blessed me to have worked for IBM in 1993 to 1997, Hewlett Packard 1997 to 2000, and Honeywell, Inc., 2000 to current.

How did being in the military effect you?

Being in the military gave me the strength to learn the art of discipline. Being able to do what you need to do even if you don’t want to do it, having patience in difficult or trying times, and extending a hand if you want one back! Faith and trust in God is the primary focus in all of this!

What would you say to someone that wants to become an enlisted person today? My advice to any young person ‘you don’t know if you like if unless you try it’.

There is NO place in this world that you can get the training that the military provides, travel the world, and serve your country as well. It is necessary to use wisdom at this time in our lives but What else are you doing?

Networking Aerobics by Dr. Victoria White The world seems to be in the middle of a fitness craze! To capitalize on the fitness theme, this month's article will focus on what you can do to exercise your networking skills. I've put together a series of exercises you can consider to be networking aerobics savvy. Diligent practice of these exercises will pay off in a healthy networking ability and improved contacts that will lead to contracts.

1. Leg lifts: Rise from the chair, couch, recliner or car seat where you usually sit and get to a networking event. As we develop technology more and more as a business tool, it might be tempting to indulge in "cocooning" and get roped into staying in your business locale. This isn't the best way to expand your business, much less develop a healthy word-ofmouth base. But if you're reading this article, you already know that and are looking for more.

2. Arm extensions: Extend your right hand from the shoulder to reach for the hand of any new contacts you meet.

Shaking hands is an important part of making a new contact. Not extending the hand of friendship can be perceived negatively.

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It sets you apart as being aloof and cold.

There are all kinds of things that have been written about the right way to shake the hand of a new contact: the twohanded shake, the elbow hold and so on.

Just be courteous and warm, and I'm sure however you shake hands you'll make a good impression, as long as you aren't the dead-fish-shaker type!

3. Jaw flex (to follow immediately after arm extensions): Let the new contacts know succinctly who you are and what you do. Make sure to be specific and provide a benefit statement about your services. Don't forget that a good networker has two ears and one mouth and should use both of them proportionately-so give the jaw a little break.

4. The splits: Now that you're getting warmed up, move into the splits. As you see groups of two or three, notice if they are "open" twos and threes or "closed" twos and threes. The open twos and threes will have a gap between the individuals, almost inviting another person to join with them.

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The closed twos and threes will be completely self-absorbed and wouldn’t be the first place to start practicing the splits. If you feel uncomfortable doing the splits on your own, ask the person hosting the event, or perhaps the individual who invited you to attend, to come around with you and introduce you to clusters of people.

5. Drop and carry: Ask for your new contacts' business cards. Drop them into your left pocket and carry them back to your office. I usually carry my own business cards in my right pocket and use the left pocket to carry the new contacts’ cards.

This habit can spare you the embarrassment of reaching into your pocket for your card and producing someone else's card!

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THE SANTA CLAUS CHRONICLES OR WHAT DOES SANTA CLAUS HAVE TO DO WITH LEADERSHIP? A CONTINUATION…

By Sandra Wright, PhD

Tis’ the season to be jolly, and well-- Santa is back at if again!

Listening to the Elves or your STAFF is extremely important! Many times, leaders feel they know everything and can do everything! They’ve been there and done that. Santa Claus says that you must start LISTENING INTENTIONALLY. Listening is a skill that must be developed. It’s a part of communicating as Santa reminds all of us of! We must avoid interrupting folk when they are talking. Stop being judgmental is what one of the elves offered as a piece of advice. Show them that you are interested in what is being said.

As we further look at Santa Claus as a leader, we think about something he said in the past concerning making decisions, in regards being a great leader, “when a decision needed to be made, I was pretty sure I could handle all of that by myself”, or so Santa thought! “ I made all the decisions myself, without even asking, and I definitely didn’t listen to anyone.” Until one day…one day out in the workshop there arose such a clatter, and he sprang from his office to see what was the matter.

Santa thought he had it all under control, and many times YOU as a leader might think you have it all together! It’s a one-man/woman show!

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The elves knew that the clatter they heard was the flawed assembly production machine.

The first thing they said to Santa, ‘We would have told you if you had asked us from the beginning…and REALLY listened to what we had to say! Since that time, Santa not only listens to the elves, but he also involves them in toy-making decisions.

It seems now, the production line runs much smoother. Santa asks for and listens to the elves’ ideas and opinions. So, in essence Santa has listened, acted, and WALKED AWHILE IN THEIR SHOES! What does it mean to WALK AWHILE IN THEIR SHOES? It means when you as a leader can work beside your team, and ask what can I do to make your life easier? He has also started a focus group and is doing employee surveys as well.

Your staff, just like the ELVES will thank you for seeing things through their eyes. Just like Santa -- walking in smaller shoes, yet nonetheless important shoes; your feet may not fit them, but your heart most definitely does.

Santa, the leader says, “I’m a much better Santa because I have learned to pay attention and listen to my staff—the elves. I finally opened by EARS to participate.

Check out my blog: http://successisyourdestiny.blogspot.com/

Dr. Sandra Wright is the Editor-in-Chief of CHIC SAVANT Reach her at: info@sandracollinswright.com (404) 890-0028

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Balancing Work, Play, and Rest: The Trilogy of a Fulfilled Professional Life

By Dr. Deborah "Dr. DJ" Johnson-Blake, The Time Management Diva

Lastly, it is essential to rest. It is not the 5hour sleep stints between deadlines. Real rest is about replenishing. Think about the difference between a power nap and an eight-hour deep slumber. Both can be beneficial, but only one truly rejuvenates.

Find what feels restorative for you. It might be reading a book, meditating, or taking a long walk without your smartwatch nudging you about your step count.

The age-old adage "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" is not just for Jack. It is for Jane, Aisha, Miguel, and every professional who has ever sent "just one more email" at 10 p.m. The blend of work, play, and rest is not merely a pursuit; it is a delicate dance we must master to live a fulfilled and enriching life. Moreover, that dance feels like evading rain in a storm rather than a graceful dance.

Firstly, work. It offers purpose and financial security. Nevertheless, it is crucial to delineate an era where office and home boundaries merge, especially with endless virtual meetings. When work ends, truly disconnect. Watching Netflix while checking emails is not unwinding. Set clear work boundaries for genuine relaxation.

Then there is play. Also, I am not talking about the two-week vacation you promised yourself last summer but never took. Play is the spontaneous joy of picking up a guitar, painting a canvas, or even belting out a song in the shower (off-key is perfectly okay!). It is the laughter shared with friends, a hike in the mountains, or an impromptu kitchen dance party. This unstructured, gleeful abandon is the universe's saying, "You are more than your job title."

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Here is the deal. Balancing is not about giving equal time to work, play, and rest.

It is about respecting each other and ensuring all three are in harmony. A wellplayed guitar chord is not about strumming each string with equal force but ensuring each string plays its part harmoniously.

So, next time you answer emails on a Saturday, remember that a harmonious life is one where work, play, and rest coexist and enrich one another. Make time for each, and you will enjoy a more balanced life.

Dr. DJ is the CEO of The Writing Pad, LLC, and creator of The Time Management DivaTM brand. Follow her on social @djohnsonblake and visit www.deborahjohnsonblake.com.

What’s Happening in Travel, Diva?

by Toni Winston Be Thankful for Travel Traveling is a transformative experience that opens our eyes to new cultures, perspectives, and opportunities. It enriches our lives in countless ways, allowing us to learn, grow, and appreciate the world around us. In a fast-paced and interconnected world, it’s easy to overlook the importance of travel and take it for granted.

Travel is a gift that ignites our curiosity, inspires our creativity, and enriches our lives in countless ways. It allows us to step outside our comfort zones, embrace new experiences, and cultivate a sense of gratitude for the world we inhabit. By venturing beyond our familiar surroundings, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and our place in the wider tapestry of humanity.

Thanksgiving is a wonderful time to travel and broaden our horizons, embrace new experiences, push for personal growth and independence, appreciate home, and build lasting connections with family and friends. Thanksgiving is indeed one of the busiest times for travel, as millions of people take to the roads, airspace, and railways to be with loved ones. We explore the significance of Thanksgiving travel, explore its history, and provide some helpful tips for managing this bustling travel season.

Thanksgiving is a wonderful time to travel and broaden our horizons, embrace new experiences, push for personal growth and independence, appreciate home, and build lasting connections with family and friends. Thanksgiving is indeed one of the busiest times for travel, as millions of people take to the roads, airspace, and railways to be with loved ones. We explore the significance of Thanksgiving travel, explore its history, and provide some helpful tips for managing this bustling travel season.

Thanksgiving, a holiday deeply rooted in American history, dates to the early 17th century when pilgrims and Native Americans gathered to celebrate harvest and blessings.

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Fast forward to today, Thanksgiving has evolved into a time to reunite with family and friends, enjoy delectable meals, and take a break from the daily hustle and bustle. However, while the essence remains the same, the way people celebrate this holiday has changed significantly. The concept of traveling for Thanksgiving became increasingly popular as the country expanded, and families scattered across various states and the world.

It is becoming increasingly popular to travel outside the US to embrace new experiences from exploring historical landmarks all over the world which will allow us to experience the beauty and magnificence of our planet. When we travel, we have the chance to try new foods, participate in exciting activities, and engage in adventurous pursuits that we might not have access to in our daily lives.

These experiences create lasting memories for years to come.

Undoubtedly, Thanksgiving travel can be hectic and filled with long lines, packed roads, and crowded airports. According to the American Automobile Association (AAA), approximately 55 million Americans traveled during Thanksgiving in 2019, with the majority choosing to hit the road. The reasons behind this mass migration can be attributed to the desire to be physically present with loved ones during a holiday that emphasizes familial bond and togetherness. The joy of reuniting, sharing stories, laughing, and cherishing old traditions is what compels individuals to brave the hassles of travel.

Airports become hubs of chaos during the Thanksgiving travel period.

Families with packed carry-ons can be seen rushing to catch their flights amid the backdrop of familiar holiday tunes. Travelers often encounter long security lines, delays, cancellations, and overcrowded terminals during this peak season.

However, despite the challenges, there is a unique sense of camaraderie amongst those traveling during this time, as everyone understands the significance of reaching their loved ones on this special day. Nonetheless, to ensure a smoother journey, it is advisable to plan, and adhere to certain travel tips. And remember to remain patient.

Booking flights early, avoiding peak travel days (such as the day before Thanksgiving), and opting for early morning or late-night flights can help reduce some of the travel-related stress.

Additionally, packing light, arriving at the airport with plenty of time to spare, and being aware of airline guidelines can go a long way in minimizing potential complications. For those who prefer the freedom and flexibility of the open road, preparing for Thanksgiving travel involves much the same preparation. AAA recommends conducting a vehicle maintenance check prior to embarking on a road trip, allowing ample travel time in case of traffic, and scheduling breaks to avoid fatigue. Opting for alternate routes to avoid congested highways, using navigation apps to plan the journey, and packing essential supplies are a few additional strategies to make road travel more enjoyable.

Despite the often-chaotic nature of Thanksgiving travel, it is a small sacrifice to be able to spend precious moments with loved ones during a holiday that promotes gratitude, unity, and reflection. The shared experiences, laughter, and connection forged during Thanksgiving gatherings make the trials of travel fade away as the warmth of family envelops everyone.

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The following are our top 7 getaways during Thanksgiving: Lake Tahoe, Nevada - Drive the scenic Lake Tahoe Loop and stop along the way to lounge on a beach, hike the Tahoe Rim Trail or dip your toes in the clear water. The north shore, home to one of Nevada's largest public beaches, feels laid back, and its Hyatt Regency Lake Tahoe Resort, Spa and Casino boasts a private beach. For a livelier vibe, check out South Lake Tahoe's Zephyr Cove Resort, where you can parasail, golf and find more activities. And the luxurious Edgewood Tahoe Resort, also on the south shore, will offer a 2023 Thanksgiving-inspired menu.

Iceland - One of the best places to go for Thanksgiving, when you can often see the Aurora Borealis, or Northern Lights. Combine your holiday time with a few vacation days and take a 6-day tour of Iceland: Reykjavik & the Northern Lights to see ice caves, frozen waterfalls, glaciers and the snowy, other-worldly landscape. The tour starts in Reykjavik and includes Iceland's "Golden Circle," known for its natural wonders. It ends on the South Coast, home to a volcano, black sand beaches and a magnificent waterfall. This trip will be talked about for years to come!

Costa Rica – It is one of the best places to go for Thanksgiving because the prices and crowds are usually down. It's less than three hours by plane from Miami and about five from New York. There are two international airports where you can drive three hours to Arenal Volcano National Park to enjoy its mineral-rich hot springs, rainforest trails and safari floats. You can also hike an ancient lava flow, zipline or go sloth-spotting. There is so much to do Costa Rica. Make sure you visit a cacao plantation or take a guided tour to see medicinal plants, rare fungi (some are bioluminescent) and more than 116 species of bats.

Mobile, Alabama – Take the entire family to Mobile, AL where there's something for everyone, from green spaces to rooftop restaurants to the Mobile Carnival Museum, which highlights Mobile's Mardi Gras traditions. Pop into other museums dedicated to history, art, or maritime explorations or, weather and season permitting, kayak, canoe, or fish in "America's Amazon," the Mobile-Tensaw River Delta. And don’t miss the USS Alabama Battleship Memorial Park which is open daily except Christmas.

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Croatia – Make plans to add a few more days to your Thanksgiving holiday to visit Croatia in southeast Europe. You can book a nine-day trip to Zagreb, the capital city, and Split, a coastal city known for its museums and historic sites. For a few more days, stretch your trip and add Dubrovnik, where ancient stone walls surround Baroque buildings in its UNESCO-listed Old Town. (You might recognize Dubrovnik as "King's Landing" from the Game of Thrones television series.) November is off-season, so prices and crowds are usually down. It's also wine season. If you're there on Nov. 11, 2023, celebrate at the annual winemaking festival, called Martinje.

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Milwaukee, Wisconsin - Soak up history, art, and culture in Milwaukee's Bronzeville Neighborhood located in the heart of the city's African American community in the 6th district. In 2022, the New York Times called Bronzeville, one of 52 places for a changed world, where "travelers can be part of the solution." Attractions include America's Black Holocaust Museum, an acclaimed historical and memorial museum, and the "Mother Africa" mural, shown here, on the Wisconsin Black Historical Society building at 2620 W. Center St. Don't miss the diverse restaurants and shops on and around Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Drive.

Belize – Travelers who are also history buffs, nature lovers and beachgoers can take extra time for a 9- or 12-day Thanksgiving getaway to Belize located in Central, America on the Caribbean Sea. They can explore its Mayan ruins, rainforests teeming with colorful birds and other wildlife and the stunning Belize Barrier Reef.

They can travel from Belize to Ambergris Caye, the largest Belizean island. The award-winning Victoria House Resort and Spa sits at the edge of the reef and offers luxurious accommodations like villas with private pools and a 3500-square-foot spa and fitness facility.

Thanksgiving travel, though undoubtedly challenging, is a testament to the importance of family and tradition. The millions of people who embark on journeys to celebrate this holiday serve as a testament to the need to connect and appreciate the bonds that strengthen us. So, regardless of the obstacles faced, Thanksgiving travel is an exercise in new adventures, embracing a shared experience that brings families together across the nation and the world while fostering a sense of love, unity, and gratitude.

Enjoy!

Toni CHIC SAVANT

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Surviving the Annual Company Christmas Party: Office Party Etiquette Sandra Wright, PhD

The annual Company Christmas Party is more than JUST a party. Be aware, your career needs you to act accordingly. The office party can sometimes be a battlefield. Make sure that you are aware of the tricky politics when work meets pleasure.

Did you hear about the woman who danced on the table at the Annual Christmas bash? What about the young executive that “threw up” everywhere, including on the Executive VPs’s shirt! We’ve all heard these stories, and some of them have made us laugh. Unfortunately, you know what eventually happened to that person.

They were either fired outright or shut out of “plum assignments” until they resigned. The comedienne, Phyllis Diller (you remember her?—blast from the past!) once said, “The one thing I don’t like about company parties is that I have to look for a job the next day”.

Attending company parties is a great time to meet the “powers that be”. It is an opportunity to meet the CEO and other senior level executives. These are people that you normally don’t see or speaks to. It is a great time for you to get to know your co-workers and let them know how much you appreciate their support and assistance throughout the year. Annual parties give you the chance to be able to handle business situations in a social manner.

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Be responsible at the party. Your attempt to be the LIFE OF THE PARTY may not only cost you your dignity, but your job as well. It may even cost you your life and your freedom! The ultimate responsibility good party behavior rests with you.

Here are a few tips to survive that great Annual Christmas Party: 1.

ALWAYS REMEMBER THE ANNUAL CHRISTMAS PARTY IS STILL A BUSINESS EVENT even though it is intertwined into a social event. Others will observe your outlandish or good behavior and remember it when inviting you to other events.

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MINGLE. Introduce yourself to someone that you don’t know.

Even if you are shy, force yourself to meet at least two unfamiliar people. As a shy person, look for someone that looks as shy or miserable as you are, most likely you’ll end up having fun.

3.

FIND THE PARTY HOST OR HOSTESS. Make sure you thank them, but don’t try to take up all their time. They have others to greet. You certainly don’t’ want to make a bad impression as someone that is clingy.

4. SEEK OUT INDIVIDUALS THAT CAN INFLUENCE YOUR CAREER. Talk business, but don’t talk shop, then move on.

5. DON’T USE OFFICE PARTIES AS A TIME TO GOSSIP! 6. DRESS APPROPRIATELY. Don’t be a TIE AND SNEAKER GUY, or the tightest, shortest dress at the party. If you are unsure of the party attire, ask someone.

7. HAVEN’T EATEN YET? Don’t try to make this a full meal event. Some will see you as a glutton! Unless this party is a sit-down full course meal event, make sure you just sample some of the goodies. Some employees even have the audacity to ask for “doggy bags” at a company party.

8. MAKE SURE YOU FIND YOUR BOSS AND SPEAK TO HIM OR HER BEFORE THE PARTY ENDS.

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Stressing out during the Holidays?

by Teresa Fuller

For some, the holidays can be the most wonderful time of the year, filled with family, celebrations, and gifts. For others, these same things can have the opposite effect causing anxiety, loneliness, and, more often than not, stress.

Studies have shown that more adults are feeling more stressed out during the holidays than ever before…possibly because of the recent pandemic.

The reality here is that holidays can bring as much stress as they do joy. And that’s okay.

What is important to remember is that we take care of ourselves and manage that stress in healthy ways.

1. Accept our Imperfections - We have to be honest with ourselves about what we care about during the holiday season, how much time, energy, and money we have available, and acknowledge unrealistic expectations. By being honest with ourselves, we can actually cultivate more peace and joy during the holiday season AND accept our imperfections. I recommend writing down what you’re imagining for this holiday season and see if you can do a reality check on those expectations .

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2. Avoid Social Overload and Set Boundaries Social obligations can quickly become overwhelming during the holiday season, including potentially challenging relationships with close and extended family.

Too many activities, even fun activities, can culminate in holiday stress leaving us feeling frazzled rather than fulfilled. Ask yourself questions about which activities you want to attend instead of which you feel obligated to attend. I would encourage you to be aware of your limitations and give yourself permission to set boundaries so that those activities you partake in. For activities that feel more like an obligation than a pleasure, see if you can set limits within those, perhaps going for a predesignated amount of time or avoiding them altogether. If you don’t think you can decline them, see if you can focus on something that you might enjoy about the experience.

3. Sensible Spending –Less Stress We’re all experiencing or witnessing the news headlines rolling in, focusing on inflation, a looming economic recession, and resulting layoffs sweeping the globe. It can be painful to experience financial stress that negatively impacts our ability to do all of the things we would like to do, especially when it comes to children and the holidays. It can be helpful to remember that the commercial aspect of the holidays, such as gifts, may not be the reason you, your family, or your children are the most excited about the holidays.

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4. Practice Self-Compassion Practicing self-compassion, particularly during the holiday season, is important. It allows us to recognize pain as part of what it means to be human and encourages us to be gentle and tender towards ourselves and move towards a place of kindness and care. When practicing self-compassion, it is important to reflect on how you are talking to yourself and treating yourself during this time. You might practice talking to yourself in the way that you would talk to a loved friend. We often forget to extend loving support during challenging times to ourselves when it comes easily to us to take care of friends this way. You might also write a letter to yourself saying what a caring and encouraging friend might say to you at this moment. After writing this letter, take time to really savor this letter and feel the compassionate and comforting words.

5. Go Into the Season With A Self-Care Plan Chang recommended making a self-care plan for the holiday season so that you have resources and coping tools close to hand. Remember to also maintain the self-care plan you may already have in place. While it is the season of giving, don’t deprioritize yourself. In whatever way you typically create your schedule, it can be useful to add time for your self-care activities, particularly during the busy holiday season. Additionally, take a moment and write down those activities or tools that relax you, whether that is taking a walk, writing in a journal, deep breathing, listening to soothing music, or cooking. When you start to feel stress or anxiety creep into your day, carve out time to walk away and engage in a pleasurable activity or use mindfulness techniques to bring you back to the present moment and notice how your experience changes from one moment to the next.

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Elizabeth Moliter, MA, Principal Consultant www.artofworkconsulting.com 512.643.2710

The Great Holiday Getaways It’s the holidays and you have been dreaming of that much needed vacation. Why not consider Aruba. Can you imagine sitting on the beautiful and picturesque, white sand beaches of Aruba?

Putting together a trip like this take some planning. Selecting the right hotel or resort is a critical decision as well as choosing the right accommodations will assist in defining your entire trip.

No matter the need, an upscale getaway, a relaxing pampered filled weekend, and outdoor adventure or a buzzing nightlife, Aruba will definitely fill the need.

The Aruba Renaissance Wind Creek Resort is located in Oranjestad, Aruba and near a list of attractions.

After a busy day exploring the local area, unwind at Flamingo Beach, relax at our Okeanos Spa, or laugh and play at our Wind Creek Crystal Casino. You can also enjoy a number of our on-site dining options including L.G. Smith's Steak & Chop House and Aquarius.

Aruba Renaissance Wind Creek Resort

Divi & Tamarign Aruba All Inclusive Resort

This is Tamarijn Aruba, your tropical destination in Caribbean paradise. Breathtaking oceanfront views await. World-renowned white sand beaches are just steps from your private patio or balcony.

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Fun things to do while in Aruba

Aruba Atlantis Submarine Expedition

Aruba Horseback Beach & National Park Ride

Half-Day Aruba Special Champagne Brunch Cruise

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An Interview with the BAD A Boss Lady, Jerrilynn Thomas Jerrilynn, before I ask you to share your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and tell us how you got to where you are today to our readers I'm a collaborative marketing strategist with a passion to help women thrive. I work with B2B female coaches and consultants who market themselves using books, events, VIP Intensives, podcasts, speaking engagements, courses, and membership sites. I work with them to form co-marketing partnerships with their complementary female B2B LinkedIn connections so they can have a larger audience to introduce their offers to. I basically started a business that could help women just like myself. Being an introvert has been the driving force behind my entrepreneurial steps. Marketing a service around collaboration didn't make me feel yucky when it came to selling. I discovered that I was a connector. My superpower was creating projects that brought B2B women together. Networking for the sake of standing up to say "my name is" was my kryptonite. It was also boring. Getting to know someone while working on a mutually beneficial business project is exciting and stress free. The women who attended my virtual events loved them. They didn't feel like someone was trying to "hit" on them to buy their product or service.

My initial motivation was simple - to connect with like-minded women from across the globe and seek opportunities to supplement my family's income. This venture into the digital realm was a godsend, especially for someone who considered herself extremely introverted.

My journey commenced with a simple, yet ambitious newsletter called "Savvy Female Entrepreneur." As I navigated the burgeoning digital landscape, I found myself increasingly immersed in the knowledge shared by the wonderful women I encountered along the way. My path continued to evolve, leading to the creation of the "Women’s News Bureau," a testament to my insatiable curiosity and commitment to the world of women in business.

Written by Dr. Sandra Wright

Please tell us about how you started your own firm and if you’d do anything different knowing what you know now.

In the mid-'90s, I embarked on a journey that would forever shape my life and career. Back then, the internet was a fledgling network of bulletin boards and listservs.

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This venture eventually evolved into the "Business Diva Network," a women's networking site designed to adapt to the ever-changing internet landscape. From there, it transformed into the "International Virtual Women’s Chamber of Commerce," a testament to my visionary leadership and dedication to empowering women in the world of business.

Yet, my true calling emerged with "Women Partner." I recognized the tremendous potential in women coming together to create collaborative marketing ventures rather than merely selling to each other. "Women Partner" became the platform for inspiring and nurturing women to explore creative cross-marketing opportunities tailored to their unique businesses.

But I didn't stop there. I saw an opportunity to make a more resounding statement, one that would inspire women to collaborate and thrive. Thus, "Smart Women Partner & Grow Rich" was born. It was more than just a name; it encapsulated a philosophy that had been brewing within me for years. I realized the power of forging collaborative marketing partnerships, especially within the realm of LinkedIn. Over the years, the names of my websites and ventures may have changed, but my unwavering focus remained constant — working with collaborative-spirited women. With 19 years of dedicated experience on LinkedIn, I've honed my skills to perfection. My mission is clear: to assist women in crafting co-marketing campaigns around their business projects, whether it's a conference, retreat, course, podcast, or book. I empower women to build large, engaged female audiences using LinkedIn. These audiences become the springboard for achieving their business goals, from selling out events to catapulting book and e-course sales. Additionally, they fill coaching and consulting hours and expand their membership bases by establishing co-marketing partnerships with like-minded businesswomen in their LinkedIn Rolodex.

My preferred social media platform is LinkedIn, where I thrive in my mission to inspire, educate, and propel women toward collaborative success. With unwavering dedication and a profound commitment to women in business, I am leading the charge into a world where smart women partner and, in doing so, grow rich not only in prosperity but in connections, knowledge, and empowerment. The one thing I would do differently is take entrepreneurial classes or at least buy books on marketing strategies and selling.

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What do you think about Risk, and what role has taking risks played in your life and career?

I jumped in with both feet when I started my entrepreneurial journey. Taking risks by creating a women's business network that focused on collaboration instead of selling to everyone under the sun was going against the grain. What required educating my target audience back in the day is more commonplace today. Taking risks has allowed me to build a memorable personal brand. I have women whom I connected with over 10 years ago who didn't have a business but followed my posts, reaching out to hire me to work on their collaborative marketing strategy because they were starting their entrepreneurial journey.

What is the most important factor behind your success/success of your brand?

I help women use LinkedIn confidently and make them a part of a tribe of women who want to see them succeed. They don't feel alone anymore.

Have any books or other resources had a big impact on you?

The E-Myth was the book that piqued my interest. I absolutely loved the branded magazines by Oprah and Martha Stewart, along with Pink, Success and Inc. magazine. I absorbed them from front to back.

We’d love to hear about how you keep in touch with clients.

I keep in touch with clients by inviting them to participate in LinkedIn Audio Events, interviewing them in my newsletters and making introductions via DMs to break the ice between them and my female connections who would make great comarketing partners.

How can readers contact you Contact Info: jerrilynnbth@smartwomenpartner.com, DM via LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/smartwomenpartner.com My website is:

https://smartwomenpartner.com

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MUST READS!!

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