On the Subject of Loving-Kindness

By Emmanuelle Festas-Keogh

Living Rural in Hastings Ontario

by Shannon Preston

Dogs. They are such amazing creatures and spending time with a dog creates so much peacefulness. As pack animals, dogs thrive with leadership and companions. I cannot offer enough leadership or companionship to keep a canine happy, so I will stick with my (barely) independent felines. Dogs are so incredibly smart. I find that most dogs are as smart (or smarter) than the average Joe. I say this because I have witnessed dog owners being completely daft countless times. For example: when I go for a walk on our beautiful trail through Hastings towards Campbellford or Keene

I see bags of dog poop hanging from trees or thrown into ditches. I cannot fault the dog for going to the bathroom outside, but I sure can point and yell at the owner who picks the poop up and throws it, bag and all, into nature! Contrary to popular belief, those bags do not break down while they hang from the tree branch (plus what a horrible excuse for littering). You would get less flack if you let your dog do their business a couple feet off the trail, actually.

It seems that a lot of folks in Hastings would love to see an off-leash dog park in town. If dog owners want a dog park, then they are going to have to raise money for, and work for, a dog park. Visiting a dog park sounds like great fun. A lot of dogs (and their people) would benefit from the socialization offered at an off-leash park in Hastings. Maybe one day dog families will work to bring a dog park to Hastings for all to enjoy.

Loving- kindness, or “Metta”, as it is called in the Pali language (the ancient language in which the Buddhist teachings were written) means friendliness and kindness. In Buddhism, it is understood as one of the Four Divine Abidings, or Abodes. These Four Divine Abodes are: loving kindness, compassion, empathetic joy (joy for others and happiness at their successes) and equanimity (the ability to remain calm and steady within ourselves and with others, in the midst of life’s ups and downs). Practicing these Divine Abidings in our lives is strongly emphasized in Buddhism and some formal contemplative practices, such as meditation, help in cultivating them.

In the last twenty to thirty years, loving-kindness meditation has become more wellknown in our secular societies. Reputed Buddhist and mindfulness teachers such as Sharon Salzberg, Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach, Thin Nah Han, Jon Kabat-ZInn (a leader in the field of mindfulness), and more recently Kristin Neff, have educated us about it. They have promoted its benefits, pointing to its powerful positive influence on our well-being—a positive influence that is experienced at the individual level, but also at a social level.

These teachers recommend some meditative practices that help in cultivating this quality of loving-kindness. Thanks to the internet, one can find a number of free audio meditation recordings, along with a number of books and articles that explain what loving kindness is about.

I personally have been practicing meditation for a number of years and I have come to appreciate the power of these practices 0n terms of my own well-being, but also, in the clarity of understanding I have gained about life in general, what is often referred to as “clear seeing”. Interestingly, as my meditation practice has evolved over the years, loving-kindness has become its central part.

Loving kindness meditation involves cultivating love, friendliness, and kindness within. The focus is directed first towards ourselves, then towards others. This focus is practiced through the silent inwardly repeating of mantras such as “May I be well”, “May I be safe and protected”, “May I be free from suffering,” “May I let go of all that causes me suffering”. These mantras are an invitation, not a command. There is no obligation to feel these things, one is simply to evoke them, without expecting anything to happen, focusing instead on the process, and the experience.

The practice then is expanded to include others. For some people, the focus might remain solely on themselves for some time, even years. But once one has managed to cultivate some level of loving-kindness towards oneself, the focus is then expanded to include others, starting with the inner circle of loved ones, then expanded further to include people in the community, in the world, eventually including all human beings. An emphasis is put on all the people that are suffering today. Wishing them to feel supported and cared for. It is also part of the practice to focus on the people we have conflicts with, or people who have harmed us in some way, wishing them well too. This part of the practice can be quite challenging; but it has the ability to transform entrenched strong negative feelings, lessening their intensity.

Loving-kindness meditation might not resonate with you for some time. It might even feel silly or self-indulgent or unrealistic. Yet overtime, its transformative power can be felt, changing you in a radical way, as feelings of acceptance and love, towards oneself and towards others, deepen. Interestingly, I have also come to see the value of these contemplative practices for our global communities. The barriers set between us as people vanishing, and a great sense of social connection developing and growing with a sense that we are all family, and that we all deserve to be loved and cared for. As such, I can see this practice as having some powerful potential, at a political level. When we manage to break free of the barriers, we do not view people as “refugees”, “emigrants” “homeless’”, “addicts” or “the enemy”. We do not see some human beings as less deserving than others. Personally, I am intending to keep on practicing it. And I am inviting you to give it a try, perhaps for the month of February?

Mark Family Literacy Day Every Day of the Year

By Bill Eekhof

Staff at Five Counties Children’s Centre say the lessons from Family Literacy Day should be encouraged and embraced 365 days of the year.

“We can’t talk enough about the importance of literacy and speech skills for a child’s future success in life,” says Ida Lloyd, a Speech-Language Pathologist. “Reading, singing, listening, talking, and playing with your child every day is not only fun, but supports literacy.”

Five Counties Children’s Centre provides therapy and support services for hundreds of children and youth with speech, language, and communication needs. Early intervention is vital so children with speech, language and reading challenges can get the help they need from organizations like Five Counties. Developmental milestones like those provided by the Ontario government can be a good measure on the progress a child is making to communicate. Five Counties also offers tips, milestones and resources on its KidTalk website for families to support children’s speech skills.

“There are many fun ways that families can encourage literacy skills, without children even realizing they are learning,” says Lloyd. “Reading a book at bedtime, visiting the library, playing a board game together, or swapping jokes while doing the dishes can all be great options.”

Five Counties is sharing 12 simple tips (as compiled by the Start Early organization) that families can use to support literacy for young children:

Start early. Reading to babies is important for healthy brain development and lays the foundation for language and writing skills.

Make reading part of the daily routine. Reading or sharing a story every day is ideal. Create a set time during the day (like just before bed) to which parents and children can look forward.

Try board and cloth books for babies. Board and cloth books are great options for youngsters who like to touch things and put them in their mouths.

Take turns with your toddler. At their second birthday, most toddlers can hold a book and point at pictures. Let your toddler turn the pages of a board book and respond to her when she points or reacts to the story.

Ask your child questions while reading. Make the reading experience interactive. Ask him questions, like: “what do you think will happen next?,’ or “What was your favorite part of the story?”

Reread favorite books. Most three-year-olds can complete sentences in familiar stories. Read her favorite books over and over to help her learn through repetition.

Otonabee Conservation offers Tree Seedling Sales Program again in 2023!

By Karen Halley

Point out similar words. By age four, children begin to recognize letters. Pointing out words in a book that start with the same letter can help preschoolers become familiar with the letter.

Count objects on the page. Count objects on the page together to help strengthen early math skills.

Get a child to tell the story. After their fifth birthday, children can sit still for longer books and create their own stories based on the pictures. Ask a child to share the basic plot of the book or make up stories based on what is seen on each page.

Read with passion! Using inflection and maintaining the same highs and lows in your voice at the same point in a story helps your child begin to remember the words.

Set an example. Let your child see you reading books to help her develop her own love of reading. Read, read, read and repeat. Reading to your child helps develop a love of stories and books, while taking you to new worlds and on new adventures.

Otonabee Conservation is once again encouraging landowners in the Otonabee Region Watershed to enhance their property and mitigate climate change by planting trees. Each year, Otonabee Conservation offers a wide selection of native tree and shrub species for landowners to purchase. Orders can be placed online at otonabeeconservation.com

“Trees play an important role in maintaining a healthy and resilient natural environment; planting more trees will help provide habitat and mitigate the impacts of climate change,” explains Meredith Carter, Manager of the Watershed Management Program at Otonabee Conservation, “Last year, 115 landowners in our watershed purchased and planted over 14,000 trees and shrubs through our Tree Seedling Sales Program. This will translate to approximately, 2.5 million kg of sequestered Carbon over the lifetime of these trees!”

Landowners can choose from a variety of coniferous and deciduous trees and wildlife shrubs including White Pine, Eastern White Cedar, Red Oak, Sugar Maple, Highbush Cranberry, and Buttonbush, along with some unique species such as Tulip Tree, Bitternut Hickory, and Serviceberry. The minimum order is 25 seedlings of a selected species.

“Trees and forests also protect water quality in our rivers and streams,” continues Carter, “They provide habitat for birds and other wildlife, and they add to the health of our communities by purifying the air and enhancing the environment that surrounds us.”

Orders can be submitted online now, for pickup in spring 2023, with an order deadline of March 20th. Demand for tree seedlings has been high over the past two years; for the best selection of species and quantities, be sure to get your order in soon. New this year, payment is conveniently and securely available online at the time of purchase.

Details about the Otonabee Conservation Tree Seedling Sales Program, including helpful tips about planting and caring for young seedlings, choosing the right trees for your land, and the online ordering system are available at otonabeeconservation. com/programs/tree-planting.