The Silhouette - September 8, 2016

The Silhouette sincerely apologizes to Glenn De Caire for the false contents found in the previous version of the article “The hiring and requested firing of Glenn De Caire,” published on thesil.ca and distributed across campus on March 24, 2016. The disparaging statements made about Glenn De Caire are entirely untrue and hereby unconditionally retracted by The Silhouette.

Thursday, September 8, 2016

WITH OPEN ARMS July Talk caps off Welcome Week 2016. Recap Page 3

SPORTS UNDEFEATED At 2-0, Mac football sits atop the OUA Page 11

ARTS & CULTURE 100 DOLLAR GALLERY Supercrawl marks its final exhibition Page 13

OPINION WELCOME BACK, MAC Should Welcome Week expand its focus?

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News Welcome to the McMaster family Faculties band together to make first week memorable

MSU president, Justin Monaco-Barnes, introduces the Air Bands event.

C/O MIKE BEATTIE Gali\ Katznelson Contributor

Sept. 3 marked the last day of Welcome Week 2016.

This year, approximately 6,000 incoming first year students, McMaster’s largest incoming class since 2003, engaged in eight days of cheering and activities led by enthusiastic reps.

“It was the smoothest welcome week so far,” said Patricia Kousoulas, fourth year Honours Life Sciences student and faculty orientation planner.

First-year midwifery student Lauren Tignanelli, the residence orientation planner agreed.

“Everything seemed to click.”

Tignanelli explained that the reason things felt smooth was due to the increased effort of ensuring that people in charge were in better communication with each other before first year students arrived on campus.

“One thing that I felt this year was that people were a lot more open to talk and work things out together before the week happened. People had known each other early enough to work out those knots so when it came to, it was like ‘oh yeah we have a good relationship, this is good, we know what we’re doing.’”

Marina Bredin, fourth year Honours Arts & Science student and faculty planner agreed.

“Lauren and Patricia really cultivated a bonding environment for the reps throughout the summer that really trickled down and spread throughout the rep teams.”

Many of McMaster’s traditional Welcome Week events returned this year, such as the Faculty and Residence Cup competitions. The competition consists of points being awarded throughout the week for faculty and residence teams for events such as Airbands, Bedracers, PJ Parade and Shinerama.

Nursing won the Faculty Cup while McKay Hall earned the Residence Cup. This year, the competition seemed less emphasised than in previous Welcome Weeks.

“In the past, the cup was more of a focus of Welcome Week, especially for faculties,” said Bredin.

To Kousoulas, the cup undermines the aim of Welcome Week.

“For a lot of people Welcome Week feels like a giant competition and that’s why I’m not the biggest fan of the cup.”

This year, however, Kousoulas explained that there was a more collaborative atmosphere around campus.

“It felt like there was a lot more love between the faculties and students. You have an event like Faculty Fusion and everyone’s cheering for their own faculty but you always end with the message that we are “One McMaster.”

The collaborative spirit

was also seen in the Shinerama fundraiser, a national post-secondary fundraiser for cystic fibrosis research.

Rather than promoting events from previous years that aimed to decrease other groups’ points during Shinerama, reps embraced a more mutually beneficial approach to fundraising. Massages given from Kinesiology reps in exchange for donations were a particularly popular fundraising initiative throughout the week.

Though students and reps did not beat the 2013 Shinerama record of $180,000, McMaster students still came together to raise a total of $107,000.

To concerns regarding the dwindling attendance of first year students at events toward the end of the week, Tignanelli explained that the low turnout is actually a positive sign.

“It shows that students are starting to feel more comfortable on campus. Students are more comfortable going to plac-

“It felt like there was a lot more love between the faculties and students ... Everyone’s cheering for their own faculty but you always end with the message that we are ‘One McMaster.’”

Patricia Kousoulas 4th-year Honours Life Sciences student es on their own and choosing what events to go to, and I think that’s why we do Welcome Week - we want students to make connections and feel comfortable on campus.” @TheSilhouette

4 |

NEWS

September 8, 2016 | www.thesil.ca

Mixed reactions to MUSC facelift Improvements near Starbucks and the Arts Quad staircase should improve traffic flow Sasha Dhesi News Reporter

After a busy summer, the McMaster University Student Centre renovations are finally complete.

Construction began on May 2, and primarily focused on the Mills Plaza entrance as well as the North Quad stairs.

The west wing of MUSC expanded further into Mills Plaza and converted from a corridor to a lounge.

The main purpose of the renovations was to increase seating in MUSC in addition to reducing traffic congestion around these two areas. The renovations were slated to add about 125 seats to MUSC, most of which are concentrated in the lounge built in front of the Starbucks in MUSC. They also added another staircase leading to the Arts Quad meant to reduce congestion in that area.

The projected cost of the renovations was about $1.5 million, which were covered by excess MUSC reserves.

When MUSC was first built, the MSU collected a small fee from students to pay the mortgage over time, and the sudden influx of students following the elimination of the OAC year in 2003 caused a surplus which was transferred to MUSC and placed in a capital fund.

Student reactions to the new space have largely been positive. The new lounge in front of Starbucks is particularly popular with students due to its open-air concept and comfortable seating.

“I think this is going to make MUSC an easier place to hang out, especially during ex-

ams. There was so much empty space before and this is a lot more student-friendly,” said Dev Shields, a third-year English and Cultural Studies student.

The new renovations have come just in time for the new generation of McMaster students, who are enjoying their new home base.

“I really like the MUSC, it’s great aesthetically, there’s a lot of great spots for students to meet up or wind down,” said Megh Rathod, a first-year Integrated Sciences student.

Some students have their reservations about the layout of MUSC, though.

“The new student centre is really aesthetically pleasing but the changes also seem really inconvenient for some people. I feel the traffic will really increase because of the extra space for people to meet up and sell textbooks. It also feels like certain practices will have to change such as tabling for clubs during Clubs and during the year,” pointed out Cindy Lam, a fourth-year Social Work student.

“I enjoy the reconstruction of the space, however, the layout and design of the furniture are not up to my standards,” said Susie Ellis, a third-year Communications and Multimedia student.

The main complaint is towards the colour scheme chosen for the booth and couches, which are currently blue and orange, respectively.

Overall, the new renovations bode well for improving student life on campus, as well as improving campus traffic and revitalise the atmosphere in MUSC. @sashadhesi

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The MUSC renovations added about 125 seats to the building.

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NEWS

New Pulse, better gains

McMaster’s fitness centres receives upgrades at its 10-year anniversary Steven Chen News Reporter

Students returning to campus this fall should be delighted to hear of the refreshing renovations done inside the Pulse Fitness Centre earlier this month.

The campus fitness centre has a history of switching between many locations, before settling in David Braley Athletic Center for the past decade.

To commemorate the 10-year anniversary in its new home, the Pulse has gone through a significant remodelling of the interior, with the purpose of replacing older equipment and optimizing the floor layout.

While many students were enjoying the quieter summer days, the Pulse was hectic with major changes and renovations.

“We closed for one whole week and it was in part to replace all of our strength equipment, ” explained Laura Rietmuller, Fitness Coordinator at the Pulse. Based on what was built into the original plans when the Pulse first opened in September 2006, the equipment underwent a major replenishment.

This is easily apparent for anyone entering the renovated facility, with new McMaster-

branded dumbbells, more squat racks, punching bags, Battleropes and much more.

Debbie Marinoff Shupe, Manager of Recreation Services, emphasizes this milestone. “We have updated cardio equipment in the past and other things we needed, but nothing this major since we have opened. It is the largest renovation since its opening.”

The layout of the Pulse has also undergone a noticeable reorganization.

“We have thinned out some of the equipment so there’s more space for people to use, and for more functional training. Based on where the current fitness industry is going, we wish to promote the use of your body weight, and the use of small items and accessories rather than the use of large machines which isolate particular muscle groups,” noted Rietmuller.

The rationale for this is based on emulating everyday activities.

“It is a healthier approach to activity as opposed to getting on a machine and isolating everything. We want to show that there are a lot of fun things to do at the Pulse, rather than just getting on ‘torture’ machines,” said Marioff Shupe

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jokingly.

And while these upgrades to the Pulse seem great for now, there are promises of an expansion at a much greater scale for the upcoming future.

Plans to expand have been largely discussed in recent years, considering that the Pulse’s capacity, initially designed for 14,000, has risen to service more than 25,000 people.

“There certainly has been some work done with an architect, and the master plan is scheduled to be released within the next couple of weeks. We have been working alongside the MSU and SRA in planning what a referendum would look like,” noted Marinoff Shupe.

Although final details are unclear, it is safe to say that students can expect a bigger and better Pulse.

“We would look to doubling in size based on preliminary drawings,” said Rietmuller.

The punching bag is one of the more buzzworthy additions.

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EDITORIAL

| 7

Editorial Putting the “you” in university To get the most of your McMaster career, create your own experiences and don’t fear failure

Scott Hastie Editor-in-Chief

Welcome Week is a marathon that passes like a sprint.

First years are bombarded with information. Of course, the intention of this overload is pure, but still. It is a lot to take in.

Everyone is interested in helping first years succeed. But there is a catch: to succeed, some of us need to fail.

It is not hard to find the listicles that give you advice for your university career. They vary, but there is crossover in the advice we hear during Welcome Week and these online sources: “Go to class!”, “Go to your prof ’s office hours!”

“Do not procrastinate.”

All of this is true and good

advice. Following those tips will guarantee you that you get good grades and reduce the stress in your life.

It does not mean you will get a good education.

At university, some of the most important experiences start beyond the classroom.

There are opportunities and freedoms that are afforded to you for the first time, and taking advantage of that is not a bad thing.

If you want to sleep in past your 8:30 a.m. anthropology lecture so you can go to Tuesday night karaoke at Boston Pizza, do it. If you are lucky, you will see the 12-year-old kid who shows up and sings “Uptown Funk.” He is an inspiration.

Feel free to put off that essay because there’s literally anything else that’s more

exciting going on. Objectively, this is such terrible advice that I am not sure it can even qualify as advice. But if you want to do it, go ahead.

Understand there are some consequences. Experience is the best teacher, and when you’re up at 4:30 a.m. finishing a works cited page, just to realize you’ve used MLA for the entire paper when you were supposed to use APA, you will probably never want to do that again.

Late essays and missed lectures are not ideal, but they are not the end of the world.

You have some room to make mistakes here, and failing can be okay if you learn from it.

By focusing strictly on your studies, you are going to miss out on so much.

to all the folks who visited us at Clubsfest. to corny slogans about the new year. to dog snaps. to Popliteal Fossa. to staying hydrated. to our incredible Sil reps/guerrilla marketers.

to Clubsfest, always falling on a Wednesday. Damn. to the student centre temperature. to that temporary Mills fence. to the lack of iced products. to the Main St. bottleneck.

to BNFC.

to the annual postWelcome Week plague.

to the newest Sportscentre hire.

to slow first-year walkers.

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to deez nuts.

to 80’s babies.

to the beginning.

to the beginning of another beginning’s end.

2016 is the largest incoming freshman class since:

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How many touchdowns has Asher Hastings thrown?

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to planning vacations in advance. to L.R. Wilson Hall. You are beautiful. to WH B1008. to you, the reader.

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www.thesil.ca | September 8, 2016

The Silhouette

| 9

Opinion Welcome back, Mac

Should Welcome Week expand its focus to include more returning students?

SILHOUETTE FILE PHOTO Shane Madill Opinions Editor

Over the years, Frost Weeks, Light Up the Nights and Homecomings have continuously helped McMaster grow together and celebrate. While there are smaller events sprinkled throughout the year, such as coffee houses and club-related events, they typically only include students with a small set of interests and lack the diversity of large-scale events.

The magnitude and anticipation that big MSU events have can’t be matched.

Welcome Week passed, and disappointment followed. Not that it wasn’t a great event, I’m sure a large portion of incoming students will cite it for a long time as being their favourite university experience, but that it doesn’t unite the students as successfully as these other events.

If the point was to include returning students, then the advertising and social media wasn’t there to support that purpose. The McMaster Students Union Facebook page had a total of five posts in August concerning the week — all of them focused on the concerts.

The McMaster Welcome Week page was centered on first years with lots of coverage on the reps, first-year experiences and an Issuu featuring tips for starting university.

The MSU Campus Events page had a mixed message.

The schedule was posted on Aug. 10. 17 days before the first events, the selection of people who saw the post were able to plan out their schedules well ahead of time. However, the extensive coverage about Airbands only began the day of, Bedracers was previewed only two hours before the event and no other events were featured.

Even if it was always the case, Welcome Week should feel more like everyone can contribute.

While Facebook isn’t the only social media avenue, the MSU often doesn’t focus on alternate web channels. The #McSU sidebar persisted instead of #MacWW2016 on their site, and there is still no Instagram link next to their other social media. There simply wasn’t enough promotion.

If the point is to only include upper years for specific events, why is that the case? A constant bubble already persists for a lot of first years in being confined to faculty and residence cliques. The previously mentioned MSU events and general clubs do a decent job

of introducing students to the community at large, but the question becomes whether these alone are good enough.

In Patrick Deane’s “Forward with Integrity” letter in 2011, he notes that “We are an institution devoted to the cultivation of human potential, which we believe cannot be realized by individuals in isolation from one another, from their history or their imagined future, from the society which surrounds them, or from the physical universe which sustains them. Our programs and activities will reflect this comprehensive view.” While intended for a larger discussion on the school’s academic identity, it can be directly applied to the separation that happens between incoming students and the rest of the community that aren’t reps.

There is a big opportunity to introduce new students to a

large MSU event early on with the rest of the university outside of sports and concerts.

We already have examples of McMaster being able to serve the entire community with Frost Week and Light Up the Night. While it’s difficult to advocate for fixing what isn’t broken, Welcome Week could serve the purpose of introducing new students to one another and bringing the entire community together at the same time.

Even if none of the events change, simply promoting these events to returning students would help with things like lining the sides of the PJ Parade, give Justin Monaco-Barnes a few more trips to the dunk tank and reminding people they can donate to Shinerama. Even if it was always the case, Welcome Week should feel more like everyone can contribute. @shanemadill

10 |

OPINION

September 8, 2016 | www.thesil.ca

Why it’s important to get off campus Rachel Katz Managing Editor

The school year has started, bus route 51 has returned to the streets of Hamilton and there are still plenty of gorgeous days left to explore the city we all call at least our part-time home.

Mac has a beautiful campus. Between the architecture, the grounds and the fact that we back onto Cootes Paradise, there are plenty of reasons to stay within the campus bubble, occasionally venturing out to a restaurant in Westdale or a run along the rail trail in Ainslie Wood. While these are great neighbourhoods with lots of fun activities for students, Hamilton has even more to offer.

It’s easy to rattle off a list of events going on in Hamilton at any given point. I could give you any number of reasons to go see Albion Falls or check out Supercrawl. Honestly though, the most important thing you can do is get off campus, period, and from there, get out of Westdale.

McMaster undergrads call Hamilton home for somewhere between three and six years on average. In that time, it seems only logical to get a feel for that home. Forget the events going on downtown or the tourist destinations where your Mac ID grants you free admission. The city is your host for the duration of your time here, and it is

important to take full advantage of that. As great as it is to learn the intricacies of the areas surrounding the university, you will likely not feel like a part of the city until you venture beyond King and Longwood. You are in the midst of great change.

Your metaphorical horizon is expanding, and it makes sense for your literal horizon to grow with it.

Establishing your own stomping grounds in a city is one of the first steps in truly feeling at home there. This may hold especially true for those who have yet to find their capital S “Spot” on campus.

Exploring a new part of a city, whether you have lived there for three weeks or three years, can be daunting. I am not suggesting it is not. But when you are into your fourth week of midterm stress and are looking for a break from the Mills study cubicles, almost no kind of study break is as easily refreshing as a view that doesn’t remind you of school. It feels incredibly rewarding to master a new part of the city, or figure out exactly where that bus route goes.

While knowing all the corners of campus is a triumph, feeling at home wherever you are in your adopted city feels even better. @RachAlbertaKatz

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www.thesil.ca | September 8, 2016

The Silhouette | 11

Sports Mac football off to a flying start McMaster football opens the season strong with dominance on all three sides of the ball Cullum Brownbridge Sports Editor

Two games, two wins. So far, so good.

The McMaster football team opened their regular season with a 40-10 win over Canadian Interuniversity Sport no. 9 ranked Carleton, in front of a sellout crowd at Ron Joyce Stadium, most of whom were frosh students getting their first look at Marauder football. One week later, in a Labour day clash at Tim Hortons Field, Mac once again flexed their muscles in a dominating 32-5 victory over Toronto.

Mac’s balanced offence has looked impressive thus far. Quarterback Asher Hastings has shown no signs of rust, leading the way with over 300 yards per game and five touchdowns. Three of these touchdowns have gone to CIS first-team wide receiver Danny Vandervoort, who has registered over 100 yards receiving over the first two games of the season while making big-time plays (including a deep one-handed grab against Toronto) and making opposing defences helpless.

The excellent chemistry between the two has grown even more since the end of last season.

“We basically picked up where we started off,” Vandervoort said, after their victory over Carleton. “We had good

McMaster wide receiver Danny Vandervoort makes a one-handed grab against Toronto.

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chemistry at East-West [Bowl] too, we were actually roommates there. Hopefully it carries on for the rest of the season.

Chris Pezzetta – returning from an ACL injury that kept him out of the 2015 campaign – has balanced the offensive attack on the ground, rushing for over 100 yards against Toronto this past Monday behind a powerful offensive line.

Even after all these years (Pezzetta started in 2011, the same year McMaster won the Vanier), the team still relies on him to carry the load on his

back.

“The o-line was big today, especially in the second half,” Pezzetta noted after the win on Monday. “They created holes and made my job a lot easier.”

Perhaps more impressivehas been the dominance of the Marauder defence. The defensive schemes created by Knox and co-defensive coordinators Joe Sardo and Mark Forsyth, have held teams to 54 rushing yards per game (2nd best in the OUA) and 15 points over two games (4th best).

“One thing that’s helped

us has been playing with a lead, which allows us to be a little more conservative and make the offense move the ball in small chunks rather than over the top,” Knox said. “Probably our biggest success has been limiting explosion plays, which are really the only things that will hurt us. So [we are] making offenses work for everything they get.”

An improvement from the 2015 season has been the special teams, specifically the performance from first year kicker Adam Preocanin, who

thus far has remained perfect in field goal attempts, tallying 15 and 20 points respectively in his first two games.

“He showed a great deal of poise for us for a young man,” Knox said. “He’s stepped up, vand right now we have a lot of confidence in him.”

McMaster hits the road this Saturday for the first time this season against the 1-0 Ottawa Gee-Gees. While only two games in, all signs point to optimism for a successful season, and for Mac fans, hopefully a deep playoff run in November.

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The Silhouette | 13

www.thesil.ca | September 8, 2016

Arts & Culture Hundred Dollar Gallery cashes in Local “dollar store” art gallery to debut its farewell exhibition during this week’s Supercrawl

Top: Exhibition by Giller prize candidate Gary Barwin.

Bottom: “The Comfort Bureau” by Trisha Lavoie C/O ANDREW MCPHAIL Daniel Arauz A&C Editor

Despite the influx of small businesses, the self-proclaimed claim to fame of new James Street North is still found in its art studios and gallery spaces.

However, the now year-old Hundred Dollar Gallery stands on the corner of James and Cannon as an oddity, even beyond the city’s borders.

It was conceptualized as a joke between local artists Stephen Altena and Andrew McPhail, but has since been pushed as a means for patrons to dip their toes into art collecting. It is a gallery modelled after the low, fixed-priced model of a dollar store. Past exhibitions have included an office made only with crochet, grocery carts adorned with deer antlers, 3D printed sculptures and encyclopaedia collages, among others. These shows reflect on the current state of the local art community, as well as explore the monetary and sentimental value placed on art itself.

During this upcoming

Supercrawl, the Hundred Dollar Gallery will unveil their final exhibition. PRICELE$$: Art You Can’t Afford is a tongue-incheek betrayal of the gallery’s namesake.

The final show marks a new chapter for the gallery’s owners. Altena and McPhail are redirecting their attention to personal and collaborative art projects, as well as looking towards possible pop-ups and small shows in the future.

The announcement has come suddenly for followers of the gallery, but as McPhail explained, the one year life span was preordained.

“When we opened, we always thought of this as sort of a project. Neither Stephen or I have plans to be life-long gallerists, because were both artists and that’s where our interest lies” said McPhail.

“We always viewed this as a sort of a limited time project and not something we would continue forever, and when we close the space or when we move out of the space we’ll still be doing other [curatorial

things] around town. We still got a bunch of things we are developing with other spaces or other people. So it will be the end of the Hundred Dollar Gallery space but it won’t be the end of Hundred Dollar Gallery.”

While McPhail thoroughly enjoyed being a gallerist in the James St. community, he explained that he ultimately wishes to continue his career as an artist first and foremost.

“I learned lots of things.

It’s been interesting as an artist to sort of see it form the other side,” reflected McPhail. “I know as an artist approaching galleries I have lots of experience seeing it from that side so it’s interesting to see it as a gallery owner having artists approach us. That’s been a bit of an eye opener just in terms of what to expect and how we want to be approached. It’s been educational.”

The limited time with the space, its low rent, and a healthy community of artists and supporters surrounding it have allowed the Hundred Dollar Gallery project to enjoy

a successful run. In many ways, it stands as a unique product in the Hamilton community.

“We knew this wouldn’t be a commercial gallery, we’re never going to make money.

We initially thought even if we could cover half our rent like we’ll be happy,” explained McPhail. To the pair’s surprise, the gallery eventually grew to be a sustainable project, something that may have been unachievable in the high-cost art districts of the GTA. “The community has been really supportive. We’ve had lots of attention from people in Toronto. We’ve had lots of support just from everybody” recalled McPhail.

“Everybody just loves the idea of the Hundred Dollar Gallery.

People just think it’s hilarious.

We’ve been really happy with the response. So we wanted to go out on a high note too.”

The beginning of the end of the Hundred Dollar Gallery space comes with unconventional timing. Supercrawl consistently marks the beginning for new locales all across the downtown core, capitalizing on the business opportunity the event brings. It is rare that a space, focused on the arts no less, will use the occasion to say goodbye, and celebrate a year-long legacy with its most outlandish show yet. @danielarauzz

A&C

September 8, 2016 | www.thesil.ca

A&C sits down with Featurette and talk about their latest EP, sound, song writing and this one time in band camp

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vignette will feature a different concept.

“It doesn’t limit us either, we’re allowed to be angry and change with her mood.”

When asked how she began to write songs, Jay accredits her talent to her classical training in music theory and musical theatre.

“I got a guitar for my birthday and I’ve always loved music… In my own deepest darkest moments I would write things down in this book that were just for me; creative but more introverted. But when you take these ideas and put them together with this massively extroverted music [Fedorsen] and I come up with the juxtaposition just makes some really cool [stuff]…In fact, when we wrote our first bio we described our music as 18th century song cycle meets modern day digital romance.”

And it is this juxtaposition that seems to give Featurette its unique persona. Talented musicians who produce great music aside, the duo possess an air that sets them apart from the rest of their field.

The combination of Jay’s classical training in musical theatre, theory and orchestra along with Fedorsen’s experience from playing in jazz, rock and funk bands offers them a diverse array of talent to cultivate their music from.

Judging by the looks on the audiences faces after their set, I’m confident to say on behalf of everyone that we look forward to what story the next EP– or the next featurette– will tell.

DJ STAPLES B2B TEEZY

As I made my way through throngs of students adorned by glow sticks in Faculty Hollow, the sheer anticipation for Adventure Club was as palpable as the heavy evening air that hung above us. Just moments ago, Toronto-based synth-pop duo Featurette had set the stage ablaze with infectious energy by playing a dynamic set in front of hundreds of McMaster students at the annual Welcome Week concert. Although the combination of bright lights and loud cheering jarred my nerves, they were quickly quelled as I was warmly welcomed into the duo’s trailer for our interview.

Comprised of singer Lexie Jay and drummer Jon Fedorsen, Featurette is a synth-pop band that features a combination of tantalizing synth hooks and emotionally-charged lyrics.

There is a filigree quality to Jay’s voice that infuses every song with a dreamy, iridescent quality on top of punchy bass lines. Similar to other artists in the genre, Featurette draws influences from electro-pop sounds that originate from Northern Europe, Denmark and New Zealand. In 2015, the duo released a two-part debut EP titled Crave Volumes 1 and 2.

Although Featurette is now a synth-pop band, Jay and Fedorsen started off as a folk outfit who later traded in soft acoustic tunes for electronic beats.

“We actually met at band camp. We were both teaching and I knew she played a little of bit of music on her own so I

kind of bullied her into playing with me. She had a song book she had been keeping for a couple years and there were some pretty great songs in it,” said Fedorson.

Jay added that the pair were able to fulfill the gaps they each felt in their own music.

Fedorsen said, “Honestly, no real instrument can really give you that sub-bass fullness with as much control as the technology we use does. Having the freedom to dial in certain sounds makes the [process of making music] awesome.”

“It was all [Fedorsen],” Jay said. “He came to me with the concept [for the name of our band].”

“I’ve been in a couple bands when I was really young and what I found happened was that after some initial success with radio tours and perhaps a second album, [the band] would get bullied into making an album of singles,” Fedorson explained.

“And this process would kind of would lose a lot of fans who liked the first work. So I thought it would be nicer– it’s so hard to make an album these days, it takes so long– to have a band that did small featurettes, small stories. [Jay] had a book of songs so essentially that’s the story to our EP.” “Exactly. It’s the story of a girl. It’s the girl you see on stage,” Jay added.

“In our next album, or the next featurette I should say, she might be angrier. Something else might have happened to her,” Fedorson said.

Jay explained that each

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Michelle Yeung A&C Reporter

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CALL THE COPS The student newspaper made a typo and their lack of professionalism is ridiclous A5

THURSDAY

THE

HAMILTON SPECULATOR Missing Harambe since 1934

September 8, 2016

NOTSPEC.COM

Speeding down Sterling is cool as hell

If you don’t think driving cars fast is cool, then what are you even doing here?

SHIT HASTINGS Have I been here too long?

On Oct. 10, 2013, the Speculator reported on a McMaster sensation: a dude speeding down Sterling Street in his dad’s BMW. Everyone was impressed by the car’s speed between stop signs, and naturally, this guy is the coolest guy on campus.

Well, he’s back! Or maybe he never left.

The Speculator has been unable to confirm the identity of the driver, though the neighbourhood scuttlebutt is that he goes by just one name: Maverick.

A few times a week, the driver will leave campus after going to the Pulse, flooring the gas pedal as he leaves through

the Forsyth and Sterling intersection.

“I’ve tattooed his name on the bottom of my right foot, so that whenever I drive, I am honouring Maverick. He is just the coolest guy on campus and I want to be Maverick. I fucking love Maverick,” said Trevor Kosmo, 25.

Neighbourhood residents have mixed feelings about the speedster. On one hand, Westdale residents love to have something else to complain about. On the other, Maverick is single-handedly making Westdale the hottest neighbourhood this side of Liberty Village.

“So, it is a really loud car and he plays that Drake song really loud, but man. Maverick just emanates cool. He’s basical-

POLL: what 90s slang should come back?

What’s the 411?

As if.

Talk to the hand.

NOT

DISCLAIMER: This is all fake. Seriously, it’s bullshit. Some people actually think it is real, so we print a disclaimer to explain that the Hamilton Speculator is a work of fiction. What a world.

ly 2016’s version of the Fonz,” said Samantha Trout, who lives on Sterling and has called the cops over 100 times to complain about students, but seems to like Maverick.

There is an obvious safety risk with this behaviour. Maverick only has one hand on the wheel at all times, because that is what looks coolest. But he could easily lose control of the car at any time, and there’s a high number of pedestrians and bikers in the area. University officials would not speak on the record about this behaviour, but one source spoke on the condition of anonymity about Maverick.

“All I’m going to say is that some people want Maverick to be the new Provost. He rules.”

“I’ve tattooed his name on the bottom of my right foot, so that whenever I drive, I am honouring Maverick. He is just the coolest guy on campus and I want to be Maverick.

I fucking love Maverick.”

Trevor Kosmo McMaster Student

- Dave-o, 18

WELCOME, WEAK A3 THREE PEOPLE MELT IN STUDENT CENTRE C2 GIVE IT A CLUBS-REST B2 REPORT: MAN FALLS IN LOVE WITH TWITTER BOT D9 WILSON HALL AND OATES A5 DON’T SWIM IN COOTES B4 2008 CALLED AND THEY WANT THEIR HOMECOMING CONCERT BACK H1

FEATURE Is there a cult based out of James Street North?

A10-11

Tweets to the Editor I sleep naked but the reps wouldn’t let me walk naked in the PJ parade.

INSIDE

Does Hamilton always smell like this?

- Virginia, 18

PER ISSUE: Three Union Market lids.