TPS Press October 2023

The Presentation School

TPS Press The News That Randomly Appears in Your Classroom Issue No. 1 | October 2023

Barbie Dance Q. What did you think about the Barbie Dance?

A. Quinn Wilhelm: The Barbie Dance was very fun A. Gigi Vaio: The dance was super fun! I loved the songs!

A. Doc G: I really liked the Barbie Dance!

A. Owen Uhr: I thought it wouldn’t be as fun as it was, but it was very fun!

A. Teagan Sammarco: It was fun.

A. Martina Schnaidt: I thought it was really fun, but the boys caused a lot of stress.

What was your favorite part of the Barbie Dance?

A. Anonymous: The food was good.

A. Anonymous: I liked the decorations A. Bella Yazzolino (Student Council President): my favorite part was spending time with my friends A. Anonymous: The photo booth was fun.

A. Leo Tudisco: I liked the snacks.

A. Keaton Abodeely (Student Council Vice President): I loved the decor and the music More on page 3

Dungeons & Dragons Dungeons & Dragons is a role-playing game that, in my opinion, is very, very fun to play. I believe strongly in this because it is a way for people to connect and you can basically do anything you want. You could fight the mightiest dragons or the wimpiest orc. No matter what you do, you are always doing something adventurous and exciting. You may have never played D&D but you may have seen it on the popular TV show Stranger Things. (continue reading on page 3) Page 1

TPS Press Barbie Dance (continued) Q. What did you think of the theme?

A. Anonymous teacher: the theme was meh. I don’t really like Barbie.

A. Carina Flocco: I liked the theme.

A. Max DeLuca: I liked the positivity A. Mason Pucci: I really liked the Barbie theme.

A. Audrey Preston: I liked the decor, and it was really fun.

5th Graders are on their way to becoming inventors!

Dungeons & Dragons (continued) That still doesn’t answer the question: what is D&D? You design your own character based on the different classes. You can have Cleric, Paladin, Wizard, Sorcerer, Barbarian, Druid, Fighter, Ranger, and Rogue. Many people enjoy this game which is why there is a D&D club run by Doc. G and in this club, you go on many different quests from all around facing monsters like manticores, demogorgons, evil fairies, and maybe even a dragon.

In the most recent Aspire D&D campaign, four characters have been befriending fairies, saving an older lady from a hungry manticore, fighting two hungry demogorgons, and saving mystical beings from the grips of death. Here are some people who have never played D&D but are interested. Here is Bianca and she thinks “I saw it in Stranger Things and think that it is cool and would like to try it.” And here is a person who has played a couple of times who says, “I think that it is fun and exciting, and people who haven't played should.” So that is all about D&D and how to play. So next time you sign up for aspire, maybe consider D&D. Page 2

TPS Press Breaking News! Alien Mischief in the 6th Grade Room!

Small alien creatures invaded the sixth grade room and Mr. Durgin has no idea where they came from. They came into the room and stayed overnight, but Mr. Durgin suspected nothing. The alien people vandalized the classroom with decorations during the night, and invited more of their alien friends in! Clueless, Mr. Durgin asked the 6th grade class if they knew anything about the Halloween decorations put up, but no one knew about anything!

The only lead was that one anonymous student reported that it could be ALIENS!!! Mr. Durgin went back home one night after setting up cameras in the room, and he saw that the camera had been disabled overnight! The next night, he decided to stay in the classroom overnight, so he pounded down 6 cups of coffee. Somehow, he still fell asleep. When he woke up, though, he had a mustache and a beard drawn on his face with a Sharpie. After he washed the Sharpie off, he angrily asked his class again if they had done it, but again, they said they had nothing to do with it. He asked the other classes, but they too said they had nothing to do with it. Mr. Durgin set up eight more cameras, but this time, the aliens were careless. They didn’t think that Mr. Durgin would set up more cameras, but he did. Mr. Durgin saw the small, glowing, green men setting up decorations. Mr. Durgin quickly drove to school that morning and caught them in the act.

“AH HA!” He said. The little people quickly went under a desk and brought out a small, odd-shaped whistle and blew into it. A shrill piercing noise arose from the desk that sounded like a fire alarm. Suddenly, a small flying saucer flew into the room. Mr. Durgin rubbed his eyes. “Is this REAL???” He was too stunned to do anything. The aliens got into the ship and they flew out. Mr. Durgin helplessly chased after them. “Hehehehehehe!!!”

They cackled. “HEY!!!” Mr. Durgin yelled. The aliens disappeared, and they haven’t returned yet. WILL THEY COME BACK? AND WHERE WILL THEY GO TO NEXT? LOOK OUT TEACHERS!!! P.S. Teachers please report to Ms. Gallo if you see anything suspicious.

By The TPS Press News Crew

7th Grade Trip to the Oregon Shakespeare Festival!

Page 3

TPS Press Word Search

Jokes Page

Find the Teachers!

What did the sunbathing pig say?

I am BACON in the sun!

Why do people tell actors to “Break a leg?”

Because every play has a CAST! How does Darth Vader like his toast?

On the DARK SIDE! What do you call a fake noodle?

An IMPASTA! What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A STICK! By the Newspaper Elective, TPS PRESS

Funny Memes

Page 4

TPS Press Events Calendar Friday, October 27: Fall Festival Tuesday, October 31: Halloween Costume Day Wednesday, November 1: Late Start at 9:00am Thursday, November 2: Makeup Picture day Wednesday, November 8: Assembly Liturgy - Dress Uniform Thursday, November 9: Veterans Day Assembly Friday, November 10: No School - Veterans Day Thursday, November 16: Assembly Showcase November 20-24: Thanksgiving Break

Who’s on the Newspaper?

Funny Memes

If you’re interested in writing or joining the newspaper crew, it’s going to come soon!

There will be a Quarter 2 newspaper elective so get excited and sign up soon!

Kendall Conway ‘23 Named to the U-15 US Women’s National Soccer Team CHICAGO (Oct. 6, 2023) – The U.S. Under-15 Women’s Youth National Team will come together in Portland, Oregon for a training camp being held from Oct. 15-22.

U-15 WYNT head coach Ciara Crinion has called up 24 players with 23 born in 2009 and one in 2010. This will be the fourth and final event of 2023 for this age group, but first with 2009s as the age group transitioned from 2008s at the start of August.

The 2008s came together in June for a successful trip to Europe where it destoryed the Netherlands 7-0 and Germany, 1-0.

These 24 players come from 17 different youth clubs and 11 different states, including five players from Texas and seven from California. Kendall Conway is sure to make a big impact on the team!

Page 5

TPS Press