Let's Play Mermaids

Fill in the blanks:

Adjective—

Body of water—

Bodypart—

Place—

Condiment—

Article of clothing—

Material—

Adjective—

Age—

Plural insult—

Noun—

Place—

Noun—

Liquid—

Adjective—

Scent—

Noun—

Plural body part—

Plural object—

Adjective—

Verb—

Mythical Creature—

Celebrity—

Adjective—

Body Part—

Number—

-ing Verb—

Noun—

Plural Sea Creature—

Plural Article of Clothing—

Cocktail—

Sea creature—

Female celebrity—

Adjective—

Plural object—

Object—

Adjective—

Body part—

Raunchy Noun—

Number—

Your name—

Noun—

It is a(n) [adjective] summer day outside, and you are looking for a [body of water] to get your [body part] wet. You have a friend who has a connection in [place], lucky! You smear [condiment] on your nose for SPF and adjust your [article of clothing] made of [material], toss your goggles into your bag, and head that way. 

The water feels so [adjective], making you feel like you’re [age] again. “Mermaid time, you [plural insult]!” Your friend transforms into the Countess [noun] of the [Place] Kingdom, and you become Siren [noun], Keeper of the [Liquid] Lagoon. Your tails are made of [adjective] scales and smell faintly of [scent]. You swim around, braiding [noun] into your [plural body part] and collecting [plural object] for your treasure trove. Just as you are about to duel over the [adjective] pearl, the water begins to [verb].

Suddenly, a [mythical creature] named [celebrity] appears from a whirlpool. “You have summoned the [adjective] prophecy! they declare. With a flick of its [body part], you are transported to an ancient, secret mer-realm hidden beneath the Mariana Trench and ruled by a bisexual kraken queen with [number] tentacles and zero tolerance for [-ing verb]. 

Her palace is carved from fossilized [noun] and lit entirely by bioluminescent [plural sea creature] wearing tiny [plural article of clothing]. Royal guards in bedazzled scuba gear escort you past coral statues doing the splits into the Grand Hall, where everyone is sipping seafoam [cocktail] and watching a [sea creature] drag show starring Coral DeVille and Lana Del Wave. At the center of the room sat Queen [female celebrity], a legendary kraken with her glittering tentacles, a voice like [adjective] velvet, and a throne made entirely of cursed [plural object] from lost bachelorette parties. She gifts you a magical [object] that lets you breathe underwater. You join a submarine fight club led by a jellyfish with [adjective] [body part], and get matching tattoos of [raunchy noun] on your gills.

Eventually, after [number] of hours of debauchery, the queen summons a massive whirlpool to chauffeur you home. You spiral through a psychedelic tunnel of sea shanties, then crash-land back at [same place]—gasping, drenched, and covered in sequins, kelp, and one very clingy starfish named [your name]. Now, every time you go to play mermaids, you bring a [noun]—just in case the tide calls you back.