Create Wealth by Unleashing Gratitude

NOVEMBER 2015 | Series No. 1, Issue No. 4

The

wealth

Issue

Love Your Life through Intentional Gratitude with Suzanne Cope

ALSO

Don't Be Grateful, Just Be • Know Your Design Values • Choose to Have More

I N THI S I S S U E

Create

wealth

by Unleashing Gratitude

realize

Suggestions to help you acknowledge the abundance of wealth in your life, including being thankful for yourself and your desires. Plus, our day-after Thanksgiving T H I S M O N T H ’ S COV E R : suggestions; books to Artisan confidant and warm you locavore Suzanne Cope takes up; autumnal us on a journey of living herbs and oils; and new gratefully, recognizing ways to wear wealth, and feeling your favorite self-fulfilled. jewelry.

dwell

Inspiration for combining modern & bohemian in a small living space; letting go of the things that mean the most; and learning to value your kitchen, even during a renovation (with our very own Lee Lee Thompson).

live

This month’s mantra, along with insight into experiencing gratitude for your food and body, with Maureen Witten, and choosing abundance in your life, with Tami Reagor.

T H E P E RP E TUAL YOU VI S I ON

At The Perpetual You, we believe in discovering, nourishing, protecting, and embracing the best parts of ourselves— the parts that never change—our Perpetual Selves.

We are creating a movement that encourages women to love and celebrate who they already are.

Welcome T H E P E RP E TUAL YOU TE AM

LaKay Cornell

Lee Lee Thompson

Jessie Leiber

Co-founder & Editor of all things people-related

Co-Founder & Editor of all things words-related

Editor of all things design-related

LaKay is a true believer in consciously orchestrating your life. She is a lover of people, networking, champagne, the world of self-actualization and social media. She can frequently be found enjoying craft beer and introducing friends to things they didn’t know they needed. You can find her on twitter @rootsandwings04.

The lee lee is a mother by choice, writer by trade, and designer by heart. She loves shopping, drinking, redecorating, and traveling. She keeps busy trying to do all of this while remaining true to her thrifty roots. Her online personalities include @ leeleeinp and @boyswholovepink.

Jessie is a multi-disciplinary designer & art director striving to make her world more pixel perfect. When not staring at computer screens, she can be found singing (loudly) in her car or compulsively buying striped shirts. You can stalk her on Instagram @jessieleiber or see work with her at createlittlelegends.com.

N OVE MBE R MAKE RS

The Perpetual You wouldn't be possible without the help of our amazing team of volunteers. We would love to take this opportunity to introduce them to you.

Susanna Editor

Jennifer Photography Jennifer Wenzel is a wedding and lifestyle photographer in the nation's oldest city, St. Augustine Florida. She never leaves the house without her camera, because beauty is all around waiting to be found!

You can connect with her on Instagram @jenwenzelphoto or hop over to her website.

Tiffany Guru Tiffany Manchester loves to surf around the world with the man of her dreams spreading the “feelgood� message. She hopes to change the world one smile at a time via tarot, guided meditations, and other fun stuff. Connect with her online.

Susanna Brown loves traveling through time with words and often has her head buried in a good book. She enjoys trying new vegetarian dishes, shopping, and going places she's never been. She is a writer of both historical and contemporary fiction for young people of all ages, as well as an editor and proofreader.

She lives in Memphis, TN with a Yorkie named Boston.

Kylie Graphic Design Kylie Flaskos is a multidisciplinary Brisbane-based designer with a passion for organic food, animals and exploring Australia with her family. You can find her on Instagram @inkandpapercreative or experience more design here.

The Perpetual You is a place where creatives and coaches can come together to showcase their work and be part of a movement designed to shake up the world. Interested in adding your talents to the mix? Email hello@theperpetualyou.com.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

pinky up Photography

Walker Sisters

Kirsten

Photography

Graphic Design Kirsten Eike is a creative entrepreneur with a love for food, photography, and design.

When she's not curling hair for her bridal clients, she spends time dabbling in hand lettering, food photography, and yoga.

She is a true homebody and enjoys relaxing with a glass of wine and a good movie. You can peruse her food photos on Instagram @kirsteneike or her beautiful hair styles on @kirstenmariedesignllc.

Pinky up, a collective of five creative entrepreneurs following their dreams, is inspired by fashion, impassioned by nature, and enamored by the simple beauty in everyday things. Follow their journey @pinkyupblog.

Charlotte Graphic Design Charlotte Cobb loves all things creative, especially dabbling in new mediums for her firm, F & R Designs.

Charlotte's perfect day involves walking the Dorset countryside with her daughters and her camera. Socialize with her @freshandrosy.

Amy and Kay Walker traverse New England and beyond chasing sunsets, circling crowded dance floors, capturing tears and laughter, all in the pursuit of preserving stories of love, friendship, and family.

You'll find a camera around Kay's neck, a paintbrush in Amy's hand, and joy on both their faces as they do what they love best. See some of their work online and connect with them at @walkerstudiosllc.

Mags Body Image Expert Mags Baker helps women across the globe fall madly in love with their bodies, learn to eat whatever they want, and crave the good stuff. She is leading the diet-free happiness revolution at her website, MagsBaker.com.

Sarah B. Sarah A. Photography Sarah Annay is a full-time photographer, storyteller and globe-trotter. When she’s not taking photographs she’s teaching, blogging, relaxing by the waves in St. Augustine, introducing herself to the newest craft beers and camping in Vermont. Sarah’s newest project is teaching photography workshops for women in Kolkata, India. See more of her photography on her website or @sarahannayphotography.

Deb Photography Deborahhannah Neele has been traveling the globe since birth. Growing up internationally and moving countries every two years, wandering has become her norm. She picked up photography out of gratitude for her crazy life. She lives in the Midwest, but since her bags are always packed, she may be across the ocean by next week. You can follow her in Instagram: @debneele

Photography Sarah Bachelder often finds herself launching an inner rebellion against the instinct to merely “survive” life as a mother of two busy boys (one of whom was diagnosed with Leukaemia). “Dare to thrive” is her new mantra for life and a constant work in progress. While trying to keep up with her sons, she’s also trying to keep up with her thoughts, which never seem to stop. Ever. You can read some of these thoughts (shared sporadically) on her website or follow her on Facebook.

Jazelle Photography Jazelle's Artistry...Inspiring creative entrepreneurs to strengthen their brand by finding power and beauty on and off camera. You can find more of her work at JazellesArtistry.com or on Instagram and Twitter as @JazelleArtistry.

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

5

WE L COME

Society Members, get in the mood for gratitude by listening to our THANKFUL Spotify mix.

“When you look at life through the eyes of gratitude, the world becomes a magical and amazing place.”

- Jennifer Gayle

W Join our mailing list & receive this month’s custom wallpapers to download for your computer or phone.

elcome to November and the official start of the Holiday Season! I love the holidays. I always have. The sheer opulence of food, friends, family, and fun over the next two months is evidence of the abundance in our lives. It can be easy to get caught up in the stress of the holidays and lose sight of the parts of the season that we love. By slowing down and taking care of ourselves, we can create a space to truly enjoy our holidays.

Remember the saying about the wings of a butterfly flapping and a tsunami starting somewhere? If one butterfly’s wings can create something that powerful, what would thousands of butterflies flapping their wings all at once do? We’ve heard for so many years how having a daily gratitude practice can change the way you experience the world.

Many such resources tell us that just by writing down one thing we are grateful for each day, our world will shift like the Butterfly Effect. So we thought, “If acknowledging one thing you are grateful for will change your life, imagine what unleashing gratitude will do for you!?!?”

Look around you constantly, notice all the wealth you have in your life, and focus on that energy. Be grateful for the sheer excitement of it all.

We think the result will be nothing less than magical.

Join the movement.

realize to align your daily practices with your

ever-evolving desires

REALIZE

Unleash

Gratitude upon Yourself T HE PERPETUA L YOU

You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.

— Louise L. Hay

With each act of gratitude, my heart softens to the world around me.

M

y guess is that many of you thoughtful women have either read about, or have incorporated into your daily life, the act of conscious gratitude. You may even be keeping a gratitude journal. One of my most beloved mentors turned me on to the concept of a daily gratitude practice two years ago, since then I have become increasingly aware of the benefits of this very simple ritual.

With practice, I have become skilled at stopping in the moment to pay homage to the things, people and experiences around me, each time taking a brief moment to allow the euphoric feeling of gratitude wash over me. These acknowledgments of gratitude remind me of the abundance of wealth in my life— that life is bountiful, thanks to loving and supportive friends, family and coworkers and life is rich, thanks to the exciting, challenging and beautiful experiences I encounter each day.

With each small acknowledgement of gratitude, I find that my capacity for empathy, love, understanding, and willingness to be open to others increases. Conscious gratitude practice assists me in radically reframing my cognitive beliefs, allowing me to label even the most challenging of situations not as negative experiences, but as valuable gifts that are critical to personal growth. If you have also taken up the practice of conscious gratitude, you’re likely experiencing similar benefits in your own life.

A strong correlation has been shown between practicing daily gratitude and overall happiness and wealth; conscious gratitude increases our ability to view the world from a positive perspective. However, we must ask ourselves: are we spending as much time on self-appreciation as we are on the appreciation of the world around us? continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

9

Start Today Choosing even one of the following practices will incorporate more self-gratitude into your life.

1 2

Many of us engage in negative self-talk without even realizing it. First pay attention to this habit, then replace one negative or self-criticizing thought with one thought of self-gratitude.

If you’re already keeping a gratitude journal or want to start one, set a goal to write at least one gratitude moment about yourself as part of your daily journaling ritual. Try this writing stem: “Today, I am so grateful that I _________, because this means I __________.”

3

Write yourself a thank you note on a post-it.

4

Have a “Daily Gratitude Appointment” with yourself. Set a reoccurring daily event in the

Leave it somewhere that you look every day.

calendar of your cell phone that prompts you to stop and acknowledge one thing about yourself that makes you grateful.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

I’ve noticed my gratitude gushing is typically focused on the external and that these moments are generally lacking in acknowledgment of gratitude toward my own amazing and awesome self. Perhaps, like me, you have noticed this trend in your own gratitude moments?

We have become experts in the practice of acknowledging our gratitude for people, places, things, and experiences; the next challenge lies in combating our own self-critic. (You know the one, that tiny voice inside of you who has become an expert in telling you are not good enough, smart enough, skinny enough, pretty much “anything enough”).

When we make a conscious decision to shower ourselves with gratitude, our personal wealth will increase. Expressions of gratitude toward ourselves have the potential to change our self-perception, and in turn change how others perceive us. Remember that change takes time. Be gentle and compassionate with yourself. With each act of gratitude, your heart will soften.

Katie Lynch is a wannabe Buddhist, mindful psychotherapist, newbie wife, avid baker, and blissfully recovering perfectionist.

She really believes that there isn’t any problem a hot cup of tea and a nice long nap can’t solve.

REALIZE

Unleash Your Soul

This month turn your music off and take a walk or run through your favorite part of town. Connect your soul to the beauty around you by saying thank you to everything you see. Thank the sun for warmth, the leaves for bright fall colors, the clouds for flowy goodness-and thank your soul for noticing!

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

11

REALIZE

Our Leftovers Quinoa Salad with Squash, Apples, Cranberries and Pumpkin Seeds Roasted Brussel Sprouts with Cranberries Mashed Sweet Potatoes Butternut Squash Mac-n-Cheese

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

UnleashTogether more time

Don’t put those fancy dishes away just yet! Thanksgiving doesn’t have to end after your big meal. Invite friends and family over the day after Thanksgiving to spend more time together.

O

ffer delicious turkey paninis on sourdough bread topped with brie and a festive layer of cranberry sauce. Serve other leftovers on the side in beautiful bowls the colors of Fall leaves—orange, red, gold, and green. No pumpkin pie left? Serve pumpkin chocolate chip bars or apple carrot muffins instead. (Ours were ordered from the Small Kitchen, Big Taste—yum!) continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

13

Make room in your life for the continuity of family rituals. Sit together, eat together. Pay attention to your beloved children, to the grain of the wooden table, to the taste of the peach. Let it rest sweetly in your soul.

After the guests are gone and the younger family members are in bed, treat yourself to an abundant, autumnal drink. We added spiced pear, honey, and Frangelico to locally distilled bourbon. Leave the dishes for the morning, and spend the waning evening snuggling under a furry blanket. Tell stories of your favorite holiday moments, from epic family football games to sharing (and reimagining) secret family recipes to the special year when all 25 cousins gathered around your table.

— Mary Beth Danielson Susanna loves traveling through time with words and often has her head buried in a good book. She enjoys trying new vegetarian dishes, shopping, and going places she's never been. She is a writer of both historical and contemporary fiction for young people of all ages, as well as an editor and proofreader. She lives in Memphis, TN with a Yorkie named Boston. Find her online @LADY_LANCASTER90..

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

unleash

Reading Time

Society Members Learn why you should love The Secret Garden in this month's edition of, “Did she really just...�

The Secret Garden

Small Batch: Pickles, Cheese,

The Gratitude Diaries

by Frances Hodgson Burnett

Chocolate, Spirits and the Return of Artisinal Food

by Janice Kaplan

At first glance, little Mary Lennox, the child heroine of this classic novel, has little for which to be thankful, but the novel progresses swiftly into an adventure story about a girl who is changed by her friends and discoveries.

Part coming-of-age, part moral tale, part fantasy, revisiting this book will remind you how good it feels to be grateful.

by Suzanne Cope Come along on this exploration of artisans, farmers, and tradespeople that are keeping the small batch trade alive and you will learn about the past and present of each featured industry. From relevant historical tidbits to emotional and passionate stories, Suzanne Cope urges us to learn about--and be thankful for--the makers behind this movement.

In this compelling gratitude manifesto, Janice Kaplan speaks of her own experience being grateful every day.

What begins as a simple commitment to be thankful for one thing each day turns into dramatic life changes in her attitude, physicality, and relationships.

Reading this book will motivate you to begin a gratitude practice of your own.

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

15

unleash

Passion in Your Place Settings

"Of all the creative possibilities inherent in domestic life, there's none that sings to me more than the simple act of setting the table."

- Nancy Eberle

Treat yourself, and your guests, to one or more of these carefully curated pieces by following the links below:

1

Delfins Custom Napkins

4

(set of 6, $36 - $48, Etsy)

2

Table Art Eucalyptus Napkin Ring

Baroque Wood Charger Plate ($68, Horchow)

5

Glassware from Anthropologie ($18-$24, Anthropologie)

($16, Barneys New York)

3

Custom Gold Calligraphy Place Cards *

6

Nambe Tilt Dazzle Gold Place Setting ($74.99, Bed Bath & Beyond)

($2, All She Wrote Notes)

Use coupon code PERPETUAL2015 for 10% off any non-custom order

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Keep track of our favorite products by following us on Pinterest.

5 1 2

4 3 6

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

17

REALIZE

Hold great visions of your desire and allow the future to catch up with your dreams.

— Gabby Bernstein

Unleash

your Desire for

Adventure

As mothers, wives, sisters and friends, we women more often than not put our wants and hopes on the back burner for the people we love. And while it may seem valiant to be the martyr, it’s not always the best choice.

W

hen is the last time you dreamed big? When is the last time you followed those dreams?

As women, we need to find a way to pursue grand adventures without overlooking daily abundance.

The phrase “do something every day that scares you” is a great mantra if you want to unleash your desire for adventure. We often pay more attention to the rules we’ve placed upon ourselves, which keeps us from exploring things that fall outside the norm. When doubt

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

creeps in, we make excuses. Our comfort zone is warm, after all.

What if we replace the bonds of expectation and excuse with the pulleys and levers of possibility? What if we allow ourselves to dream bigger than we think we can? What if we give ourselves permission to want something?

Everyday experiences make us the women we are, but we also need to recognize and be thankful for our

Do This at Home!

Plan a vacation or excursion with YOU in mind.

Do you want to climb a mountain? Do you want to go to a museum? Have you always wanted to go to a fancy restaurant but haven’t let yourself eat there? Aim for something that’s just out of your reach, and go for it! Experience what a beautiful thing it is to fulfill a desire.

desire to want more. Gigantic moments are possible— we can craft them for ourselves. We can dream voluminous futures and outrageous weekends, and then follow through with a plan to get there.

Both the daily miracles and the grand memories bring wealth into our lives. But we are sometimes better at receiving the adventures that don’t upset the expected rhythms. This month, set an intention for gratitude—be thankful for your desire to go big.

Life is so full of everyday moments that are worthy of recognition. Summer is finding her way, living this dream and taking a moment everyday to say thank you. You can find her at airabess.blogspot.com and Instagram @airabess or #findingmywaylivingthisdream.

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

19

REALIZE

This month’s Self-Care Toolkit

Nettle Clove Abundantia Citrine

Unleash

your Potential for

Prosperity

Practice Safety Research every oil you use!

They are all used differently.

Dilute oil before application and never internally ingest it.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

We all desire abundance in our lives and are grateful when it appears. Slowing down and aligning our minds and bodies helps us to focus on the strength and power within. The following tools will help you connect to your desire for prosperity, stay in touch with a feeling of gratefulness, and remain in a state of wealth.

H E RB

ESSE N TI AL O IL

CRYSTAL

GO D D ESS

Nettle

Clove

Citrine

Abundantia

B E N E F I TS

BE N E FI TS

BENEFITS

BENE FITS

Balances overall health; boosts energy; improves allergies and helps skin conditions

Combats tooth pain; wards off colds and flu; aids digestion

Helps manifest and hold onto wealth and prosperity

Goddess of the Prosperity; helps our us to receive and open to abundance

T

he herb this month is Nettle, which is high in both mineral and vitamin content. Nettle can balance your overall health, by boosting your energy, improving allergies, and helping skin conditions. Make an infusion every other night by putting 5 heaping tablespoons of dried nettle in a quart size mason jar filled with boiling water and leave on the counter with the lid on overnight. Drink gratefully (iced or hot) the next day!

An essential oil to be thankful for this fall is Clove, used to combat tooth pain, ward off colds and the flu, and aid in digestion. Defuse clove for a warm, clean aroma in your home or add 5 drops to one ounce of a carrier.

Clove also comes in the form of an herb—likely one you already have in your pantry! Whether you use the essential oil or add a whole clove to some tea, having a natural remedy nearby is a comfort.

Citrine is the money stone, the success stone, the power stone. Citrine, which vibrates to prosperity, will assist in manifestation—both obtaining wealth and

holding onto it. Citrine is in tune to your solar plexus, the place where we hold our self-confidence and power.

This is a great stone to have close by when you are open to wealth & abundance.

The Goddess of Prosperity, Abundantia, advises that “the universe is pouring its abundance out to you. Be open to receiving.” This Roman goddess reminds us that good fortune is for those who have the strength to ask for help. With Abundantia,be in tune to the wealth of new ideas within. Look for—and be thankful for—new opportunities.

Grab hold of these autumnal tools to bring the fortune you desire into your life. Be grateful—you have the potential for prosperity in mind, body, and spirit.

Ashley Dees frolics around Saint Augustine Florida, picking herbs, helping find herbal remedies for people, playing with aromatherapy, tarot cards, and crystals, all while teaching and gathering goddesses together! Connect with her on her website greenharmonyaromatherapy.com.

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

21

REALIZE

Arm Party Tip Try this formula to get your arm party started: something solid + something sparkly + something that sways or has spikes.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Unleash

your special

Jewelery

Admit it. You have jewelry hiding away somewhere in your dressers and closets that you haven't worn in years—or worse— haven't worn at all. An heirloom from your favorite grandmother...a gift from someone special...a treat you bought for yourself but haven’t yet worn.

T

hese pieces hold special meaning. You loved them when you bought them, but just haven’t figured out the right way—or time and place—to wear them. Which occasion is special enough? Which outfit will live up to the gratitude you feel towards this jewelry?

Wearing jewelry certainly finishes your look, makes you look polished and shows your personality. But putting on a piece of jewelry you love can be an act of gratitude —gratefulness for the piece itself, where it came from and why it's in your life. These pieces are here for your use and for you to enjoy—you simply cannot enjoy them if you don't wear them!

Go ahead—bring these pieces out of hiding and put them to use! Wear them with love and thankfulness.

Let them brighten up your outfits, accept the compliments they elicit, and recognize the abundance they represent in your life.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

23

unleash

Style at Home

Here are a few ways you can unleash your special jewelry with pieces you have at home:

1 1

2

Honor Grandma's Pearls A great way to wear pearls, whether a hand-me-down strand or the modern equivalent, is to mix them in with more of the same. Worry less about the authenticity of the strands and enjoy the fabulous compliments you’re about to receive.

2

Promote your Delicates You likely have a few delicate necklaces hanging around unused—the locket you received as a girl or that curio engraved with a special date. Give yourself permission to wear these special pieces by pairing them with a trendier statement necklace.

3

Make a Super Statement A statement necklace generally outshines your other jewelry—have you tried wearing more than one? To create a truly abundant, holiday-worthy look, layer several statement necklaces on top of a basic t-shirt or blouse.

4

Have an Arm Party A fun, on-trend look is wearing three or more bracelets on one wrist. Creating a special stack—a vacation charm bracelet and a handcrafted splurge, along with a bangle that reminds you of a special memory—will bring a wealth of opportunity for admiration throughout your day.

3 4

Alice Tegtmeier is a Personal Stylist and mother of three who uses personal style as one way to helping women live authentically. You can see more of her passion for personal style, coffee, and encouragement on Instagram and Periscope: @aliteg.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

“ Thanks is what multiplies the joys and makes any life

large

.”

— Ann Voskamp

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

25

Society Members To share your own feelings about gratitude with likeminded women, join our Society Facebook group.

I show myself gratitude by surfing in winter and summer.

We want to hear your perspective!

How are you choosing freedom this holiday season? Email hello@theperpetualyou.com for a chance to be featured in next month’s issue.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Being healthy and able to surf makes me grateful every time I hit the waves. The peace I feel when out in the ocean (especially in the winter) provides me with a selfish pleasure of knowing that this time is for me—I’m doing something I truly enjoy and focusing on myself without anyone interrupting. If my kids and loved ones are happy and content and I have completed all my tasks, then I deserve this reward!

Diann B. (Topsfield, MA, USA )

PE R SPE CTI VES from THE P E RP E TUAL YOU

How do you show yourself

gratitude

on a regular basis?

I take a long relaxing shower with all my fancy body washes and lotions, then spend time in my closet trying on clothes and planning outfits. After a day in my closet, I always feel happier.

Emily (Richmond, VA, USA)

I surround myself with kindness, goodness, and love. I choose friends who celebrate and support me; I read and watch things that nourish my spirit, feed my soul, and teach me something new.

Emmanuela (Boston, MA, USA)

To take care of others, we first need to take care of ourselves. To me, this means waking up each day grateful for what I have and what I am.

Susan (Philadelphia, PA, USA)

I’m happy to tell myself thank you for doing a good job - a scoop of ice cream with hot fudge and whipped cream, or simply stopping to acknowledge and feel good about what I did.

Karen (Fairfax, VA, USA)

I show myself gratitude through deliberately slowing down, and giving myself the space and opportunity to just "be" without the need to “be accomplishing."

Katerina (Clearwater, FL, USA)

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

27

unleash

The Perpetual You is committed to showcasing & supporting organizations that spread Joy, Ease, Fun and Wealth to women and/or girls.

Giving

This series we’re featuring the organization PACE-Orange, a leader in providing voluntary, gender-responsive alternatives to delinquency for dependent girls.

We invite you to share and support the fun of PACE-Orange along with us!

Girls who attend PACE centers receive:

pacecenter.org

•

Individual academic plans and tutoring, along with gender-responsive support

•

Individual transition plans and follow-up care

•

Group instruction in life skills, health, communication, and positive decision making

•

Career preparation and readiness instruction

•

Community service experience

To learn more or to give online, visit pacecenter.org/centers/orange.

Sponsored by the State of Florida, Department of Juvenile Justice.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

3 QUESTIONS WITH OUR

Cover Story Superstar

Suzanne Cope

What’s one way that you show gratitude everyday?

What part of your living space are you the most thankful for?

Where is the connection in your life between gratitude and wealth?

My husband and I often reflect on how lucky we are and how we are very thankful for having the flexible, creative life that we have. We really try, the two of us, to make everyday to share a meal together or sit down for a glass of wine and spend time with each other...finding that few moments to reflect with my husband about our lives and what we’re accomplishing both personally and professionally, having a little moment to think and reflect.

My backyard! I love living in the city, but I need an outdoor space. When we moved to Brooklyn, we were able to buy a place right before the market kind of went crazy in our neighborhood and I just had to have that backyard.

We built two raised {garden} beds this spring and we’re almost done putting together our greenhouse from a kit. Our backyard has been the place that helps me think of New York as home. That’s my space.

We recognize how wealthy we are with being able to live in Brooklyn and own a house. We have the luxury of time—to spend together or for our own creative pursuits, and with our son too.

My job is flexible, so we travel when we can. We make a lot happen with not a lot of money. We joke about having a Mysterious Source of Income, but it really has to do with what we prioritize: eating healthily, eating together, and spending time together. That’s abundance for us.

realize

dwell

live

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

29

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

photo courtesy of James Collier

The Key to

Loving

Your Life Intentional Gratitude, Unconventional Wealth, and Revolutionary Self-Fulfillment Suzanne Cope is living every writer’s dream: after receiving her MFA & PHD, she wrote a book, got it published, and started thinking about her next book. She lives and breathes her own literary success by honoring local artisans as well as her personal history in the food choices she makes. At home, she has a lovely garden, a sweet kid named Rocco, and a supportive husband (who’s also a musician!). Oh yeah, and a backyard in Brooklyn.

J

ealous? You don't have to be. Suzanne’s story isn't extraordinary in the way we think of extraordinary stories, but it is revolutionary in that she gives to herself as much as she gives to others. You read that right: the key to Suzanne’s success is that she loves herself and gives to herself what she needs. If you’re reading this magazine, I don’t have to convince you that this isn’t the norm for a woman in her 30s or 40s, especially one who is a mom.

Just as Suzanne presents the narrative of artisanal life as one that is a modern reaction to years of food injustice, her life and work— simple as it may seem—is a modern reaction to years of women being told to put the needs of others first.

She is part of a movement that is happening by and for women who are no longer willing to take second place to everything around them. By prioritizing her needs, recognizing her wealth, and choosing to be grateful, Suzanne is a model for all of us.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

31

“Narrative is one of the key ingredients in each of the products, for artisans must tell their story and the story of their industry to add value to the products that for so long have been available in cheap, lower-quality, massproduced versions.”

Suzanne grew up in “way Upstate New York” which was “literally on a dirt road” surrounded by the space in her “huge backyard.” Though her family didn’t have a garden of their own, both of her grandmothers were gardeners and canners. She was exposed to the idea of living off the land long before “going local” became a popular movement. She even remembers jelly selling for only $4 at a local farmer’s market—an unheard of price for a handcrafted good these days!

When her family moved to Brooklyn from a suburb outside Boston, Suzanne insisted on having space of their own for a garden. By this time she had become well-versed in locavore culture, subscribing to CSA’s and joining community gardens, canning food for your family—not because you have to, but because you want to—buying local, organic food whenever possible.

Giving herself a yard and a place

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

for a garden helped her stay true to her roots, continuing the traditions of her grandmother. “I remember her going out and picking the herbs before she cooked,” Suzanne recalls. Teaching herself how to can “connected” her with this past.

Suzanne and her husband love food: learning about it, cooking, eating, and buying it. “Ten years ago, I wouldn’t have known the difference between two varieties of tomatoes,” says Suzanne. Today, they choose to spend money on local, fresh ingredients or artisanal food with traceable ingredients.

“Sometimes I will buy something that’s a little more expensive because I think about how I am paying an actual person for a good, and I’m helping them buy a violin lesson for their kid or keep their farm afloat.” Eating locally isn’t an “indulgence,” but an investment

in her community and in her own health.

moment with my husband and my family helps us connect.”

Prioritizing these preferences is something Suzanne wouldn’t compromise. “People say, ‘Oh! Organic food doesn’t taste any better!’ Of course, we can eat food just to nourish ourselves and to enjoy it, but I also eat food, like a lot of people, that reflects [my] values. I’d rather have a little bit of something really delicious than a lot of something that’s just meh.” Dollar signs are less important than the “big picture.”

Suzanne supplements her family’s garden with farmer’s market findings. She recommends spending time creating meals from local food or figuring out how to use a vegetable they’ve never bought before brings wealth into their lives.

“We do live a lot more richly than we are financially,” says Suzanne. “We have a very rich and wealthy life. We consider ourselves lucky to have the lifestyle that we do.”

Having outdoor space is also something upon which Suzanne places a high value. “My husband and I love being outside,” she says, “We love to look around and say, ‘Wow! This land is ours and look what we’re growing.’ We have pride in what we grow. Spending that nice

Her enjoyment at gardening and involvement in the locavore movement eventually coincided with her education in and talent for writing and research, which resulted in her first book, Small Batch: Pickles, Cheese, Chocolate, Spirits, and the Return of Artisanal Food.

(See our review of Suzanne’s book on p.15.) The book chronicles the

food industry, focusing on artisans and farmers, and shares the stories of struggle and success these artists have to share. Her job is one of the ways in which she feels wealthy that doesn’t have to do with money alone.

Suzanne loves both academic and creative writing, the combination of narrative storytelling and researched facts. “I doubt the book Small Batch would have been written with my having just an MFA because I was very focused on personal narrative.” Getting her PhD allowed her writing to mature.

“One decision leads to something else in our lives that leads to something else,” she says.

Making contacts in the artisanal food world was a natural progression for Suzanne.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

33

“When I met the people who are making these things,” she says, “I understood how hard it was...I understood that the cow that gave them milk had a name and ate grass at a certain time and ate hay at other times, and that you could really taste the difference—that was so interesting to me.”

In her time spent researching farmers, artisans, distillers and cheesemakers, she witnessed a passion on par with her own. Despite a changing marketplace and numerous startup costs, entrepreneurs, or those who may have lost jobs in the recession, start artisan businesses with a plan to succeed. As they shared stories of heavily researched and well-written business plans, desires to earn a living wage, and gratitude for the industry mentors who had helped them, Suzanne recognized values she shared.

“The most successful people did as much as they could to lay the groundwork and then were able to take that leap of faith once they had a good business plan and the basic stuff figured out,” says Suzanne.

“My philosophy of life is that you should prepare as much as possible and then leap maybe a little bit before you think you are ready.”

“A product must be high quality and taste good, but the authentic story must also be compelling.”

“Of course I’ve made mistakes,” says Suzanne. Still, even these missteps have made her life wealthier. “I would have made a lot more mistakes not doing anything. I don’t think I’d be in New York.

I don’t think I’d have the job I have. I don’t think I would have written the book I wrote.”

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

She equates opening up shop in a brand new industry to sending out manuscripts for publication. Novice writers are often hesitant to send out work because of the dreaded rejection, but Suzanne doesn’t let that stop her: “rejection means someone saw [your] work! Don’t be afraid to send things out to as many journals as you can if it’s something you believe in,” she counsels. The process of writing, and her participation in it, are another form of wealth in Suzanne’s life.

Follow Suzanne on her authentic food journey @locavoreinthecity

When it came time for Suzanne to jump into something new, she was ready. “It’s kind of always been my thing that even if an idea might not be totally cooked, I’ll just kind of jump in and throw it out to the world.” While planning her next book—one about food customs of Cuba— she recognized that she had done “as much preparation as possible” without actually visiting the country.

“I’d been reading and researching about all this Cuban food, but it was a place I’d wanted to go for years. When the regulations changed, I thought, ‘I need to just do it. I can research it for so long and I can think about it for so long, but until I go I’m not going to be able to write about it the way I want to write about it.’”

“I am not a journalist, but rather a scholar and a storyteller.”

Furthering her knowledge of artisans by expanding her research into another country will let Suzanne pursue her interest in changing food traditions.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

35

“A lot of these traditions are in danger of being lost for the very reason that people don’t need to [make their own food] anymore,” she says. Preservation can be more expensive than buying healthy food.

Instead of making artisanal food out of romantic nostalgia, Suzanne believes in “using your knowledge and understanding” to keep the industry modern and forward thinking. “Embracing technology,” for example, is one way methodologies can be updated without losing the spirit of small batch food production. “Your grandmother canned by hand because she had to,” Suzanne says.

“We need to be more thoughtful about how to incorporate the best from the past into where we are in the present.”

Outside of learning about food, Suzanne is grateful to be a chronicler of this evolving industry.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

“Narrative affects value, she says, “knowing the story behind [your food] can really enhance your enjoyment.” Whether this is right or wrong isn’t Suzanne’s purview.

Instead, she focuses on telling the stories.

Food has come to represent not merely nourishment but also a way of life.

“These are people who are not rich from their job,” she says of artisans.

“They often left jobs where they made more money to do this thing that they thought better reflected their values and gave them a better lifestyle.” Suzanne will spend her time supporting them over the “industrial machine” that the food industry became when she was

young. Suzanne’s life is wealthy in so many ways: a fortunate career, a lush backyard, a loving family. The fact that she recognizes all of this now, while she’s living it, is even more gratifying. As is her mindful enjoyment of her food. “One of my best moments of the day is having a great meal,” she says. “It doesn’t have to be fancy, but I just really love savoring food.”

Suzanne’s favorite food to indulge in? “Anything with fresh tomatoes,” she says, “A fresh tomato picked from the garden is probably my most favorite food in whatever form it might take.” From a simple Caprese Salad in the summer to a flavorful Ratatouille (the soup, not the cartoon) in winter, Suzanne cooks, eats, and shares food in the same manner that she tells stories—thoughtfully, intentionally, gratefully.

dwell to align your physical space with your

ever-evolving self

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

37

Design Style Mix & Match Think apartment living has to be boring and bland?

Think again!

T

he fusion of bohemian style and mid-century modern furniture in this small living room is a foray into a brave new eclecticism.

Hard lines and sleek furniture are softened by the surrounding bohemian assortment of objects: vessels, candles, handcrafted art, and a few found objects. Whereas the bold colors and patterns of bohemian decor are complemented by the cool tones and glossy finishes of midcentury modern furniture.

The result of this anything-but-bland aesthetic is a design with timeless sensibility that remains on trend. Anybody else as jealous as I am?

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Bohemian + Mid-Century Modern

Timeless Trends

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

39

Making Space

Heirlooms among the

Grand Memories = Greater Wealth

Visit our Pinterest board for even more ideas on repurposing your heirloom pieces.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Growing up our unspoken family motto was ‘make do and mend’. I learned that if something was broken you fixed it, if it was shabby you made it attractive and if you needed something new then you invested in a high quality piece that would last a long time.

I

am very grateful for these lessons because they are at the core of how I live my life and run my business.

When my grandfather passed away he left a lot of things behind--collections he had amassed over a lifetime (there was even a windmill!). I brought home items that represented what he taught me, like his old workbench that he put together using wood he had on hand. I’ve used it as a sewing table, a workbench (I’m currently rewiring some art nouveau lamps) and as a buffet for dinner parties.

He collected old radios and so I took a few of them. The one that sits on top of my buffet was the radio he used to play while working in the garage. He always had it tuned to an old 50s station and would sing along when he thought no one was around. It was a challenge not to bring all of his treasures home, made even more difficult by my family's desire to keep everything. There

were many items sold that held fond memories, but I also recognized the need to live my own life. I had to say no in order to create space for myself to grow and thrive.

I try to abide by the one in one out rule. Bringing home a workbench meant that something needed to leave the house. Even though I learned how to sew on my grandmother's sewing machine I realized that it represented a part of me that had changed. I had moved on to other interests and passions and so I gave it away.

Now someone else is learning how to sew on it and that thrills me. So often we hold on to things that we don't care for because they were a gift or a treasured family heirloom. I read "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up" by Marie Kondo and it really helped me see how I was letting the things in my home control where I was dedicating my time, space and even money. Kondo says that we should ask ourselves if the item "sparks joy". If it doesn't, then thank it for its service and let it go.

Letting things go has cleared away the clutter in my life, including emotional clutter, and given me peace of mind. Now when I look around, my home fills me with peace, contentment and happiness. I’m grateful for the life I lead and I’ve learned that by not holding on to everything, I’m making room for wealth in my life. continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

41

dwell

on this

1

Repurpose and reimagine.

2

Make it your own.

3

Let things go.

4

Get creative.

5

Get rid of clutter.

Repurpose items and reimagine how they can be used.

It can save you money and at the same time give you something unique for your home.

Don't be afraid to change it and make it yours. If you were given a yellow dresser that has been handed down through the family and you hate yellow then paint it. Same goes with textiles- if you've been given a quilt that is a color you hate you can use fabric dye and dye it as long as it isn't made out of synthetic materials.

It's ok to let things go. You can give yourself permission to get rid of it. Be grateful for how it served you and pass it on to someone who will love and cherish it anew.

Keep memories in different formats. There are so many other ways to keep memories of someone that don't have to involve keeping a physical reminder and they don't take up as much space. I have a beautiful picture a photographer friend took of my grandmother's sewing machine. I took some of my grandfather's shirts and cut them up and made them into a quilt.

Start getting rid of the clutter. I often have clients ask me for help to store their stuff. As we start to look at what they want to store I'll ask them if they want to keep it and inevitably the answer is no. I've saved people so much money by not buying them storage! Each day get rid of one thing. At first it will be challenging but I know you can do it.

Kandy Christenson is a creator, maker, dreamer, photographer, traveler and Certified Interior Decorator. She believes design should be sustainable and transformative. Each space she designs is unique because she uses upcycled, handmade, vintage and local materials. She can be found trying out new ideas at meanderingdesign.com.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

“ Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life...it can turn

feast , a house into a home , a stranger into a friend . ” a meal into a

— Melody Beattie

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

43

DW E L L

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Design

Values

The Unexpected Wealth of a Kitchen Remodel

“When you make space for things you want in your home and in your life, those things have an easier time coming into your life.”

– Justine Blakeny

W

e weren’t supposed to remodel our kitchen. When we looked at the house and considered where our money would go, the IKEA special that was our kitchen seemed just fine. The layout of a galley kitchen seemed manageable, and there was plenty of storage. The location of the kitchen—in the very back of our house—also seemed okay, given that we aren’t “entertainers”; the part of food we enjoy is eating it together at the end of a busy day.

Then we moved into the house and started using the kitchen. The things we’d assumed about it were basically true—the location was fine, though we spend a lot more time in the kitchen than I expected or ever have in the past; the layout worked and the

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

45

size turned out to be just right for a quick cleaning. Also: storage. A ton of it. More than even I, a master collector, could fill up.

So why did we end up remodeling?

Partly, several different things fell into place making a remodel that wouldn’t break the bank possible; mostly, because of the yellow tile.

This tile—the tile that covered just about every square inch of our kitchen—belonged in a bathroom in very small quantities in 1985-ish.

Almost the color of a lemon gone bad, except not as vibrant.

Pale yellow must be the worst kind of yellow. Did you know yellow in large quantities can literally have a negative effect on some people’s psyche? For proof, just read The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, in which the heroine literally goes mad in close proximity to her yellow wallpaper. Yellow is scary! Basically, I felt uncomfortable in my own kitchen. The money center of our home! Where’s the abundance in that? Wanting

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

to remove the tile became an obsession, and I couldn’t figure out how to do that without remodeling the kitchen around it. Now, several more months later than I originally expected, there is only one little corner of yellow tile—for posterity’s sake!?—and the rest of my kitchen is stunning. Restrained, yet opulent finishes. Timeless lighting and luxurious countertops. And—instead of IKEA—my designs are everywhere: from the art on the walls to the multi-color palette to the infusion of patterned & vintage & basketry goodness all around. I truly enjoy being in my kitchen.

This from a girl who doesn’t even remember the location of the kitchen, not to mention what it looked or felt like, in her previous apartment. More importantly, I am grateful for my kitchen. Oddly, I’m also grateful for having gone through a kitchen remodel. The process was painful and timeconsuming, but also gratifying. I love seeing a plan come together.

Despite the challenges along the

way, I also loved figuring out what I wanted in my kitchen.

One of the things I am grateful to have discovered early on was that a remodel does not mean everything has to change. (Thank you, husband and friend.) This freed up our budget, time, and energy to focus on the things we did need to change.

Ahem—yellow tile. The actual bones of our kitchen were perfectly okay, so why “fix” them? I consider the need to change everything a cultural phenomenon, a result of HGTVaddiction and DIY-mindsets. Often these mindsets do not coincide with a true abundance mindset.

As an eco-conscious consumer, the stainless steel mindset is one I find particularly troubling. At what point did white become not good enough?

We’re not talking puke green here people! Last I checked, white goes with everything. I do understand the desire for well-designed, efficient models; I don’t understand why those models need to be reflective.

This trend, which has absolutely

nothing to do with the function of kitchen appliances, relies on the circular logic of capitalism. Better is better, so buy better. I’m so thankful that we have never followed this trend and that we didn’t have to consider “resell value” (this is our last house, thank-you-very-much).

The appliances in our kitchen, while not exactly modern, function perfectly. With a little Be Good cleaning solution, they shine too!

The next two mindsets that worry me are layout-related. I mentioned that the kitchen is galley style, which is actually having its moment right now in the increasingly space conscious design world. I also mentioned it is located at the back of the house. I did not mention that when in the kitchen, one is completely shut off from anything going on elsewhere. Though staring out the back windows, which don’t open, and wondering why you are not out there swinging with the

kids comes close to being a part of something. No one wants to feel alone surrounded by dirty dishes, but we just couldn’t afford to buy into the “comprehensive remodel” mindset or the “open concept” mindset. These are rampant patterns because of our more-moremore culture, not because they are actually right for everyone.

At least these mindsets come from good places. People who value entertaining or constant family time love the idea of an open concept kitchen, and people who value consistency and doing things right or not doing them at all often start by gutting a room and going from there. I understand that, but those are not our values. In this house, we re-use as much as possible. We also value the integrity of our house, which—to us—meant not following a trend that may be out of style in a few years.

Not buying into these mindsets meant spending money where we wanted to, namely the finishes. I chose the lighting first, meaning the lighting chose me.

Any light will help you see, but I wanted lighting that made a statement, provided ambience. I couldn’t afford a custom light and wasn’t keen on making my own, though Etsy had me believing I could for a couple days, so I looked for a beautiful fixture that didn’t require me handing over a small child in exchange. Enter West Elm; I do love them so. An ample, white globe hanging from an exposed black cord that connects to a champagne bronze fixture. Am I the only one drooling? This over-abundant lighting choice set the mood for the kitchen, not quite modern-not quite vintage, all the way opulent. Yum.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

47

After I’d settled upon a finish, I searched high and low for affordable, matching hardware for the cabinets.

A weighty, tarnished brass that would perfectly compliment the dark blue cabinetry I’d just had painted. We have close to thirty drawers, so the $6-$10 price range was a big shock; however, if any expense was worth it, this one was.

Do not compromise on something you will handle every day!

Unfortunately, a faucet in a matching finish was also shockingly pricey, but I’d made a choice and had to stick

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

with it; I wouldn’t be happy with anything else in its place. Though they seem indulgent, the glossy backsplash and quartz wall tile were semi-compromises to balance out the solid surface countertops I couldn’t deny us. Though there were changes throughout the process and setbacks I could go on for days about, the result is everything I’d hoped for. This kitchen is dreamy.

Outside of the opulent finishes, the parts of my kitchen that mean the most to me are the vintage and/or handcrafted accessories— golden yellow canisters found for

three bucks apiece; a coffee corner cabinet made specifically for my needs and wants; curtains that hold the mystery to my design scheme and were sewn by my gifted niece; a weary ladder turned custom shelf; and the art that, in keeping with the rest of our house, was made by me or my children and has heart & soul & love & gratefulness written all over it. What I am most grateful for isn’t a specific part of my kitchen, or even the kitchen as a whole, but the lessons I learned about myself.

(Other people do Yoga or seek therapy—I redecorate.)

Early into this project, I had to accept that I’m a Dreamer, Not a DIY-er. I couldn’t get one damn piece of that yellow tile off the wall and, after seeing the mess of dust demolition left in its wake, I didn’t want to. Thankfully, you can pay someone to demolish things. At first, I was disappointed: All of these years I thought I was one of them—those people who can do things with their hands. But I soon accepted it. I have learned that, for me, wanting to do things myself actually came from a place

of scarcity. “I can’t afford to...” doesn’t jive with abundance. Rather, “I choose to” or “I choose not to.”

When it comes to projects that involve more than a little paint and a glass of wine, my choice is no thank you.

The lesson that took the longest to sink in was that I Can Live with a Wealth of Mess. I really and sincerely do love a clean house; in fact, I think there may be no greater joy than walking around barefoot and not getting dirt or dog hair or tiny Legos stuck between your toes. Still, I have

learned that I am capable of dealing with ongoing projects that disrupt my perfectionism. Remodeling takes time—not just because of setbacks and budget concerns, but because you are making a huge change in an important place—your home.

You need time to adjust, to trust, and to decide, then re-decide, then re-re-decide. Stuff that is displaced does not negate the progress taking place.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

49

To see inspirational and before/after pics, check out our Dwell Inspiration Board on Pinterest.

Lastly, I thrive on complete creative control. Actually, I already knew this about myself, but this remodel reminded me of my “take no prisoners” design aesthetic more than once. You remember me: I’m the one who hates Yellow Tile. (I now believe the feeling is mutual.)

No matter how many visitors said, You know what? The yellow tile isn’t so bad, I still hated it. The bottom line was not whether yellow tile was fashionable or the amount of demolition/mess we were talking about, or even the fact that we value NOT obliterating whole parts of our house just in the name of design. My sanity was at stake.

This week, I’ve been reading Desha Peacock’s book, Sweet Spot Style,

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

in which she shows women how to add value to their house without breaking the budget. She asks all of her interviewees the same question: How does your living space reflect your values? If she had asked me that prior to this kitchen remodel, I would have had an answer that relied on either B.S. or other people’s concepts. I did not yet know—I couldn’t have known—what was really important to me until I threw myself in the fire of renovation and came out, only a wee bit scarred, on the other side. Today, I could answer with confidence and honesty: the values represented in our home are a tendency toward trend and an affinity for brilliance with space

for nuanced persnicketies and vintage accouterments.

The purpose of a renovation is to add value to your home, whether resell percentage points or an uptick in actual use of the space. Mine went beyond even those noble causes.

By clarifying my design values, my person, my family, and my home all became wealthier. If that isn’t worth a hundred bags of yellow tile pieces waiting to be thrown out, I don’t know what is.

Lee Lee Thompson is learning to be intentional, whether mothering, writing, designing, or imbibing. A true collector and bargain lover, she’ll shop you under the table at the thrift store of your choice. Follow her journey through pictures or through words. You’re also welcome to come hang out on her front porch.

live

to align your innermost thoughts with your

ever-evolving perspective

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

51

LIVE

An

Abundance

Mindset Let Go of Losing Weight

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Join us for Happy Hour with Mags Baker for more on this topic.

When you are faced with an abundant feast this holiday season, give thanks for the nourishment food provides and celebrate being in the company of loved ones.

I

know what you’re thinking, “It’s November 1st, I’d better find some kind of cleanse to go on for three weeks before Thanksgiving gets here or I won’t fit into my dress on New Years!” Or, maybe you’ve already decided to throw in the towel on dieting until January since you just polished off half your child’s bucket of Halloween Candy while she was in school. There’s no sense in starting a diet now—the candy will be around until Thanksgiving and then there’s Christmas: the parties, the meals, the leftovers. You might as well wait until after New Years, right? January’s YOUR month!

We live in a culture that applauds the notion of losing weight and values deprivation—in order to lose weight, we have been told, one must deprive herself of all the foods she loves. This is why we praise our friend who skips dessert—“Oh you’re so good!” we tell her. Or, we mentally scold ourselves for being ‘bad’ when we eat a hamburger with the bun.

This behavior and mindset can escalate during the holiday season. We load up our plates on Thanksgiving and announce to the group: “Diet starts tomorrow!”

If everyone knows we’ll pay for our eating sins with deprivation currency the very next day, we feel comfortable eating large quantities of food in front of them. Thus, you eat past the point of comfort at every gathering and party and inevitably gain weight over the holidays. The Dieting Industry depends on this cycle.

Even if, in the moment, you are so full you might vomit if you so much as look at another macaroon, your mind is centered on what it cannot have the next day. Going through the holidays with the intention to deprive yourself of all that you deem delicious and mouthwatering when they are over means spending every bit of your energy eating what you know will be off limits soon. When we threaten our body (and mind) with an impending diet—or “lack” of food—we are operating from a place of scarcity.

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

53

Whatever the season, dieting naturally places you in a scarcity mindset. Who among us does not hoard food when we don’t intend to “allow” ourselves to eat that food again? And when you become a food hoarder, your body becomes a fat hoarder. Instead of viewing food as the abundant resource that it is, you focus on and live in fear of the future—when you will lose the food you love.

There is another side to this “impending diet” mindset— the mindset of Abundance. Thinking abundantly involves simply allowing yourself to eat a variety of foods whenever you want or need to instead of labeling yourself as morally superior or inferior based on the foods you choose to eat. You eat to fill yourself up, physically or emotionally, choosing whatever foods serve this purpose in this moment.

Adopting an abundance mindset, and putting it into practice, will help you see that reaching a healthy weight does not involve skipping dessert or stuffing your face one day and then eating nothing but celery sticks the next. Because your brainpower isn’t being monopolized with thoughts about who is going to eat that last slice of pumpkin pie, you can focus on enjoying your time with family and friends and truly be “in the moment.”

Embracing the Abundance Mindset also includes allowing deep gratitude to be present each time you eat. Sharing a bowl of ice cream with your daughter becomes a chance to reflect on how lucky you are to be in this moment, sharing smiles and conversation with someone you care about so deeply. Eating a big green salad presents an opportunity to give thanks for the vitamins and minerals being provided to your body T HE PERPETUA L YOU

and to realize how blessed you are to make choices about the quality of the food you eat. Gathering with family turns into a celebration of thankfulness and a chance to marvel at the well-timed events that had to occur for friends and family to be together enjoying a meal. If you mindfully take into account the incredible circumstances in which you are eating, you will find something for which to be grateful.

When you are faced with an abundant feast this holiday season, give thanks for the nourishment food provides and celebrate being in the company of loved ones.

Feel safe in the knowledge that you will always have a variety of foods to choose between, from January all the way to December. When you focus more on the circumstance of eating, rather than the intake of calories, you will find that you need less to feel satisfied. Choosing healthy foods will not be a chore or a form of ‘redemption’ from overeating, but a simple way to fuel your body so it performs well.

Arriving at a healthy weight for your body is a matter of being grateful for the nourishment or the occasion or both, not about lack or impending denial. Gaining more awareness of the abundance before you—both people and food—allows you to give thanks for it. Losing the mental weight of constant food-based thoughts as a result of dieting, means gaining more of who you really are and who you were meant to be.

Maureen Witten is an Intuitive Eating Counselor, Certified Health Coach and Body Love Advocate. She teaches women to make peace with food and exercise using her 5-Step Intuitive Eating Program. To learn more, visit: beyourselfwellness.com.

P OE TRY BY

Julia Rose

Everything I Need I’m looking for a quiet place.

A place that is peaceful and calm.

I'm looking for an exciting place.

A place that is infectious with joy.

I'm looking for a supportive place.

A place of strength and courage.

I'm looking for a soft place.

A place of acceptance and warmth.

I've been searching for these places my whole life.

I've been angry, sad, frustrated, and disappointed that they seem to appear and then are gone.

I've been wrong to search for these places at all.

They do not exist outside of me.

These places are me. I needn't search for them; I am them.

Quiet. Joyful. Strong. Warm.

I only need to be still and look inward.

I am everything I need.

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

55

LIVE

NOV EM BER M A NT RA

When I shower my thoughts with

gratitude ,

the Universe bathes me with

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

abundance .

Society Members Take your self gratitude to the next level with our guided meditation.

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

57

LIVE

Choose to Have

More

Practicing Gratitude Means Accepting Abundance

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

Abundance is in all things.

Do you see it—right there in front of you?

Where?

Right there—shining before your eyes. Its sparkly, loving energy is at your fingertips...

Can you feel the warmth?

A

bundance is about how you look at the world.

Everywhere around us there are things to be grateful for. Do you look at the world from a place of lack or from a place of gratitude for what you have—even if it isn’t perfect?

Abundance is not only about the one thing we all seem to want more of—money. Money, like gratitude, is a form of energy exchange. You do something for someone and that person gives you something in return for your energy. This exchange does not always have to be in the form of money. Recognize the hugs from family and friends, a smile from a stranger, or a dozen eggs your neighbor has left on your porch as energy to be grateful for too. Yes—money can make things easier, but being grateful for what you have will lessen the need to have more money.

Feeling truly grateful means feeling good about what you do have. Have you ever heard someone say, “I am grateful, but I need ____ to be comfortable/happy/satisfied”? Being grateful means accepting the way things are without qualifications.

We take so much in this world for granted. We live in a civilized nation that has more than many others, but shows little to no gratitude for our good fortune. Many of us focus

continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

59

on what is wrong with our world instead of seeing the greatness all around us.

Abundance is a matter of perspective. Even when things are not at their best, there is still so much for which we can be grateful.

The sun still shines. There is air to breathe to fill your lungs. There is food to fill your belly.

Mother Earth is beautiful—full of natural resources, mountains, streams, lakes and valleys—all for us to gaze upon while letting the energy of these places feed our senses and soul. Imagine the world without these things: boring instead of beautiful. Look around outside; what do you see? Do you see the beauty of the trees, the birds, or the sound of the wind?

Or, is your appreciation blinded by imperfection—the pot holes in your driveway or the weeds growing in your garden?

You have a choice to make in life — you can continue to stay plugged into the fear factor—where

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

everything is miserable and bleak, where nothing ever goes right, where you feel like you will never get ahead. Alternatively, you can choose right now to start enjoying the abundance that you already have.

Are you living and breathing?

Life does not need to be perfect for you to be grateful. Life is a journey.

Imagine yourself walking on the beach; the ocean is Life. Waves go up and down; the tide goes in or out—but you are moving forward. Be grateful for the ocean—life—and its waves—the gifts and lessons we get.

They make you who you are.

Are your needs being met?

Give thanks: there is water, food, modern day luxuries, nature, your body and health, love, and many more. These are things that exist in our lives that we take for granted and do not see the abundance that they bring us.

Two things that are grandly abundant—water and air. They are everywhere (thankfully). What

Life does not need to be perfect for you to be grateful.

would your life be like without them? Many places around the world, including our beautiful west coast, are lacking and in severe need of water. Water is one of the most important substances on earth without which we would all perish. Water feeds our plants which creates abundant fruits and veggies which we then eat. Water cures our thirst and cleans our clothes and our bodies. Be thankful for the abundance of water in your life.

Do you take in mother nature’s gifts?

Also, be grateful for the nature that surrounds us. What would life look like without trees—no shade in the hot summer sun or no trees to climb for fun? I personally love to gaze at a majestic tree trunk and its branches.

Many trees have been here for hundreds of years, standing firmly, watching everything in the world go by. They stay, and allow each generation to admire their beauty and wisdom.

My dad does all of the gardening in my yard. Every year, he plants Gerbera daises at his house and at mine. At my house, I thank the flowers that bloom for their beauty and radiance every day; in return, they bloom all summer long, even when their growing season has ended. The flowers at my dad’s house bloom once or twice and that is it.

My dad loves flowers too—gardening

is what keeps him young—but he doesn’t see them as an abundance stream in his life. I truly connect to that feeling of abundance when I show my plants gratitude and am rewarded in return.

while I do not have perfect vision—I am eternally grateful for my ability to see everything around me with the help of glasses. Your body does not need to be perfect for you to be able to embrace the abundance that it brings to your life.

Does your body help you live?

Abundance is beaming from every cell of your body in the form of health. Not all things may be perfect, but focus on the things your body does for you. Your legs get you around, your digestion breaks down your food and feeds the rest of your body, your eyes let you see the beautiful world around you, and your hands allow you to touch and carry things. Your body is abundant with miracles that make your life the way it is today.

Our bodies may need help, for which we can also be grateful. I wear glasses to see long distance—so,

Do you have food to eat?

This same feeling of abundance can and should be applied to all the food we have in our life. Food is energy after all and—yes—it can feel the emotions you have about it. Don’t listen to those that tell you what to eat, what to feed your children, or how to feel after eating. We should all seek to eat the foods that we see fit to eat. Let its abundance fill you up.

The food you eat everyday is important. Be happy in the moment for what you have. If tomorrow, you continued on next page

T H E W E A LT H I S S U E

|

61

want to change it up and seek food that you think would be better— go for it! But always be thankful for what you do get to eat each day. Like the flowers in my yard that spoil me with abundant blooms all summer, the food you appreciate will bring blessing to your life.

Maybe, the idea of feeling grateful for your life makes you feel guilty. If so, you may feel that you do not deserve to shower yourself with gratitude and love, that you do not deserve abundance. Remember that you can live life to its fullest; everyone deserves that, no matter what we have or haven’t done in life. Having gratitude, happiness, and joy for who we are, and the great things that we have in our lives, isn’t selfish—

Society Members Join us on for this month's Society Social on Thursday, Nov 19th at 8:30 PM. RSVP through our private FB group!

Get Gratitude Ready We loved reading The Gratitude Diaries while preparing this issue, and we know you will too. Here are our takeaways from Janice Kaplan’s experience:

it’s rewarding.

Gratitude is an exchange of energy.

When you eat food, you get awesome nutrition and yummy flavors. When you water a plant, beautiful green leaves and fragrant flowers are the reward. Our world provides us with abundance and our gratitude feeds energy back into the world.

Abundance is a matter of perception; you get to make the choice. You can look at the world from a place of lack or with thanks and love for this place of never-ending abundance.

If you were to choose to look at life from an abundant point of view, what would your life be like?

Would it not be better?

Tami Reagor helps women change their thoughts and perspective from a lack mindset to abundance overflowing while they create the life their soul desires. She is leading a gorgeous group of women at wellbeingis.com into a world where they practice gratitude and accept abundance together.

T HE PERPETUA L YOU

1

Set an intention to be grateful. Ms. Kaplan interviewed

2

Spread the word. One of the biggest takeaways from Ms.

3

Control your reaction, not the experience.

a gym owner who had clients set intentions prior to working out. She also signed on a ͞gratitude buddy͟ who she could text her gratitude list to for accountability. Can you think of a way to hold yourself accountable on your gratitude journey?

Kaplan’s journey is how she shared her year of living gratefully goal with friends, family, celebrities, and even strangers! The more people she told, the better she became at being grateful.

Bonus—those around her became more grateful right along with her. Who doesn’t need a little likemindedness in their life?

Ms. Kaplan made note that there are some experiences you just don’t have control over: whether job loss, illness, being stuck in traffic, or friends and family letting you down. By paying attention to your reaction, instead of the experience itself you can still find something for which to be thankful.

Will you commit to finding the good in your experiences?

If you want camaraderie in your journey to gratitude, join The Perpetual You Society members on a 7-day gratitude challenge that will culminate in our monthly society social—a call-in with this month’s wealth expert, Nicole Cooley. Nicole teaches women how to be thankful for their money, which increases feelings of wealth. Curious? Find more information on Nicole here, or email her: nicole@moneywithmoxie.com.

“ I'm grateful for the abundance

have and for the abundance that's on its way that I

to me now. ” — Kate Northrup

T H E W E A LT H IS S U E

|

63

Society Join the Movement