Senior Life - St. Joseph Edition - December 2023

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December 2023 Steve and Cindy Carlock Host “Bethlehem Revisited” See Page 10 Vol. 37, No. 7

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St. JoSeph edition Reaching South Bend and SuRRounding countieS

HOLIDAY CHEER — Sandra Chambers and her team of elves spread much holiday cheer among St. Joseph county seniors through REAL Services’ Elves for Elders program. Donations are currently being accepted on the Real Services’ website. Photo provided

by Sandra Chambers.

CHRISTMAS MIRACLES — Elves for Elders creates Christmas Miracles for St. Joseph County seniors through gifting $50. The program is welcoming donations, as they are hoping to be able to reach 1,000 seniors this holiday season. Photo provided by Sandra Chambers.

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Key Positions

A senior herself, Lu Ella Webster is always reaching to do more

By BETHANNE BRINK-COX Feature Writer There aren’t enough words to describe Lu Ella Webster, nor enough hours in the day for all she does. She is the adult programs coordinator at the Notre Dame Robinson Community Learning Center, and the winner of the 2023 Rosa Parks Award.

The center was given a $40,000 Senior Living Initiative Grant last year.

“We’ve used that for starting new programs. We had a quilting class for a while but it was right after the pandemic and didn’t go so well, so I started some others,” Webster said.

Webster intends to return the quilting class to the very busy schedule her seniors enjoy.

“I want to get our fitness class restarted. My programs are all in the morning to early afternoon,” Webster said.

Those classes are varied, according to the wishes of the participants.

“We have a senior computer class. We have a ‘Lunch and Learn’ series, with speakers every month. We have two senior book clubs, and we have a retired women’s group. They bring lunch, they play cards, really do whatever they enjoy together. They’re our liveliest group at the center. I am

SENIOR BOOK CLUB — Lu Ella Webster, second from right, enjoys the Senior Book Club with other seniors. “We take it seriously, assigning chapters to different people to review so we can discuss,

and it can take a long time to get through a single book,” she said.

Photo provided by Lu Ella Webster.

starting a Mahjong group,” she noted.

Other needs are considered.

Webster said that seniors can have their taxes done beginning in February. They like that convenience, she said, and there has been a request for a Widows Club, because “these ladies have learned how much their social life has changed when they are no longer half of a couple.”

“I try to reach out and do more. I have a love for seniors and sometimes I forget I am one, too,” she said.

Webster has been involved with the center since it was just

One of the things the seniors love most is travel; day trips are always a full bus.

“I want to do a trip somewhere this coming spring. I try to take them places they’ve never been. You’d be surprised how many of them have always lived here but there are so many places they’ve just never seen,” she said. “They always want to go to the Grotto and the Basilica, and I make sure I take them to those beautiful sites. I am hoping to take them to Indianapolis. I think they would like the zoo. We also do Back the Bend volunteer projects.”

a vision of connecting the community with Notre Dame. With that in mind, the computer classes have students coming in to help the seniors learn, a wonderful experience for both generations.

“They learn how to shop online, make reservations, use a smartphone, things like that,” Webster said.

She started business courses at Ivy Tech, but found it too difficult when raising small children and working.

“I keep telling myself I’ll get that degree one day,” Webster said. “After all, you are never too old to learn.”

The most recent of those? Organizing books in the children’s library, cleaning and organizing Makerspace materials, and preparing garden boxes and planting trees. Because it is a senior center, multi-generational activities are heartwarming for those seniors who may not have children or grandchildren near, reminiscent of the foster grandparent movement a few years back.

Webster’s mother, Dora, celebrated her 100th birthday last year. Webster hopes she will have an equally long life, happy and busy for as long as possible.

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 3

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4 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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Spotlight

Wilson turns UFOs into works of art Text and Photos

By MARISSA SWEATLAND Staff Writer

Sheryl Wilson has been embroidering for over 40 years.

During those 40 years, Wilson has created a lot of UFOs, or unfinished objects, but she has also created intricate, flawless works of art. Wilson uses her wealth of knowledge to preside over the Embroiderer’s Guild of South Bend.

“Embroidering is relaxing, even at it’s worst,” Wilson mentioned, “you can sit, put your feet up and pour all your thought into your project, or else you might have to tear some stitches out.”

One of Wilson’s favorite part of being a part of the Embroiderer’s Guild is the annual decorating of the Christmas tree at the Copshaholm Mansion. Every ornament that decorates the tree was crafted

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by a member of the Guild. The angel topper was crafted by one of the charter members, Carol Collins.

Some of the ornaments were made as Guild projects, but many ornaments were personal projects that were donated by the members. The ornaments range from traditional Christmas motifs, such as snowflakes, angels, stockings and bells to nontraditional holiday icons like a holiday gnome.

“Every time we put an ornament on the tree, I think ‘oh, this is my favorite ornament!’ and then we pull another ornament out of the box and I think ‘oh, THIS is my favorite ornament,” Wilson said with a laugh.

Wilson has been involved in the Guild for so long that one of her chapter members joked she founded the Guild.

“As you get older, you have the time and money for hobbies,” Wilson mentioned, “it would be great to see the younger generation try embroidery. There are lots of beginner kits to choose from.”

Wilson’s other favorite part of being a part of the Guild is the members.

“There’s no criticism, there’s just help,” Wilson explained, “everyone is just so helpful and knowledgeable. Every problem you run into, someone here knows how to fix it.”

Currently, the Guild meets 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. on the second Monday of each month at the Francis Branch Library and 6-9 p.m. on the third Tuesday of each month at the Heritage Square Old National Bank.

During Guild meetings, members can work on personal projects and sometimes the Guild provides a new project for members to try their skills out on. For these projects, the program committee creates kits for the members so they have everything they need

FAVORITE ORNAMENT — Sheryl Wilson, Guild president, smiles as she tries to pick a favorite ornament. Every one she sees is her new favorite.

CHRISTMAS TREE TOPPER — Chris Sikorski, Guild member, braves the ladder and places the angel Christmas tree topper. The angel was crafted by Guild charter member, Carol Collins. to complete a project. These kits also help keep the cost of embroidery down because the member is only buying the amount of materials they need to complete the project.

“I would love to see new members. Anyone can join.

Experts, beginners, anyone, everyone,” Wilson said, “if you want to come, we want you here!”

Find more information about the Embroiderer’s Guild of South Bend by visiting, ega-glr. org/insbend.

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December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 5

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Elves for Elders spreads holiday cheer

By MARISSA SWEATLAND Staff Writer Continued from page 1

The Elves for Elders program has been spreading holiday cheer and Christmas miracles to St. Joseph county seniors for nearly two decades. Elves for Elders is a program run by REAL Services that gifts senior and disabled participants that take part in other REAL Services programs with a $50 gift gift.

Sandra Chambers acts as the volunteer services manager overseeing the Elves for Elders program and her passion for the program grows three sizes

every year.

“My favorite part of being involved in the Elves for Elders program is seeing the ageless look of magic in the eyes of our elders and the excitement from giving from our elves,” Chambers explained.

Chambers has been overseeing the program for two years, but her non-profit journey with REAL Services started in the late 90’s.

“I found my way to other nonprofits that called to me along the way,” Chambers explained, “after spending more than a decade working in the for-profit world, I felt like there was a more meaningful way to touch

seniors in our community.”

After being welcomed back to the non-profit, Chambers worked on growing the Elves for Elders program. Every year, the program grows and the elves are able to reach more seniors. During this holiday season, Chambers hopes to be able to reach 1,000 seniors.

“Overall, I would love to see every one of our elders served through our Elves for Elders program,” Chamber mentioned.

The Elves for Elders program is dependent on donations. Donations using a credit or debit card can be made on the REAL Services’ website, realservices. formstack.com/forms/real_dona-

tion_onetime_elves_for_elders.

Donations can also be dropped off to any of REAL Services’ locations. Gifts of any amount are welcome and appreciated.

The elves will pair donations together so each elder will receive a $50 value. Every single penny donated to the program goes directly to creating a Christmas miracle for a local elder.

“This program has brought me full circle,” Chambers mentioned, “the reward of helping others is priceless.”

REAL Services provides a roster of other helpful programs that helps keep seniors independent, including Meals on Wheels, aging and disabil-

ity resource center, alzheimer’s and dementia services, energy assistance and weatherization and transportation. For more information about the programs REAL Services offers, call (574) 233-8205.

For more information about how to donate to Elves for Elder, call (574) 284-7138. If you are interested in joining the elves, contact Sandy Chambers at volunteer@realservices.com.

“If you are on the fence about volunteering, I would definitely encourage you to,” Chambers mentioned, “I would like to think the smile and joy on my face conveys the gratification.”

Dutch would remember Mom? “Oh yes,” she assured. “He never forgets people he meets.”

Two weeks later I got a letter

from the California Governor’s office.

“I remember your mother very well,” he wrote. “Tell her I’m

going back to Des Moines this weekend to celebrate WHO’s 50th anniversary. Give her my best regards.”

When I showed Mom the letter, her only remark was: “… told you so.”

One more for the Gipper

By TOM MORROW Mature Life Features

In a way I’m here because of President Ronald Reagan. Let me explain.

Growing up in Seymour, Iowa, famous people were only known to us as images appearing in magazines, newspapers, film and, eventually, television.

So, every time the late President Reagan popped up in a movie or occasionally on television, our mother would make some sort of comment about knowing the movie star when he was a sports announcer at WHO radio in Des Moines, Iowa’s capital.

He was known to his radio listeners as “Dutch” Reagan, Mom would say in a matter-offfact way. My sister and I would roll our eyes with a wink and a nod. Mom saw our disbelieving smirks but was not deterred.

When I got a little older, I asked Mom how she knew “The Gipper,” which was a moniker Reagan picked up from his movie role in “The Knute Rockne Story,” where he portrayed football star George Gipp. Mom said she knew him in the mid-30s during the Great Depression.

“I was slinging hash at a coffee shop across the street from the radio station. Dutch came in every morning for breakfast,” she explained. “I usually took his order.”

When there was a slow time, Reagan would talk to Mom about what her aspirations were.

At that time, she was in her mid-20s and was saving to go to cosmetology school. But with money being so tight, she had almost given up. As her story went, Dutch would keep encouraging her to follow through with that dream.

She did, and after graduation, she was hired by a small beauty shop in Seymour. Had she not followed Reagan’s advice and not taken that job in Seymour, she would never have met my father.

Now leap ahead to 1974.

California Gov. Reagan was making a political speech in Phoenix where I was a newspaper editor. As luck would have it, his wife came and sat down beside me. With tongue-cheek, I passed my business card to Nancy Reagan and asked her if

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

6 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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Sports

Circuits provide full body workout

By MARISSA SWEATLAND Staff Writer “Working out should be engaging and fun,” Shelia Anderson, physical therapist, explains, “repetitive workouts do not become routine.”

Anderson has been a physical therapist in the St. Joe county region for nearly 30 years and has helped many seniors get back on their feet after a fall.

“Naturally, we lose muscle tone and strength as we age so we become more prone to falling,” Anderson explained, “but by keeping active, we can keep and even grow our strength and tone.”

Anderson recommends circuit workouts to keep working out engaging. A circuit workout involves going station to station and performing the designated exercise. For example, station one will be an exercise that targets arm muscles, like bicep curls.

Station two will be an exercise that works leg muscles, like squats. Station three will be an exercise that engages your core, like a crunch. If you go around the circuit two to three times, then in 30 minutes you have worked your arms, legs and core, which are three major muscle groups that help prevent falls.

“Circuits also allow athletes to

work more of their muscle groups in the same amount of time,” Anderson explained, “it is important to work all your muscle groups because if you do not use them, you lose them!”

Anderson noted many exercise classes designed for seniors use the circuit workout model.

“The circuit workout model also allows for socialization that individualized workouts just do not provide,”Anderson mentioned, “in circuit workouts, usually, the one big group splits along the stations into smaller groups. Working your mind with conversation is just as important as working your body with exercise.”

According to AARP, social isolation affects nearly one in five seniors. Research conducted by the Pew Research Center found that seniors who live by themselves, on average, spend about ten and a half hours alone each day.

“Core exercises are incredibly important, our core and back muscles help keep us upright and when they weaken, we start to tilt forward, our balance gets knocked off and we fall,” Anderson explained, “leg muscles are also obviously important because they support our weight. If they grow too weak to support our

CIRCUIT WORKOUT — During this circuit workout class, participants worked their arm, leg and core muscle groups. Building muscle tone and strength is instrumental in preventing falls. Photo by Marissa Sweatland. weight, then a fall is going to happen.”

The American Heart Association recommends adults get at least 150 minutes of moderateintensity exercise throughout the week.

“The beauty of circuit workouts is you can do them from the comfort of your own home,” Anderson suggested, “a carton of milk can work as a dumbbell for bicep curls. Cans of soup are also excellent dumbbells. Both items

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your body because serious injury can occur,” Anderson urged, “give your body rest. If you work arms and core one day, then the next focus on legs.”

As Anderson mentioned, there is a variety of senior workout classes in the St. Joe county area. For those who prefer at-home workouts, there are many workout videos available on video streaming platforms, such as YouTube.

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are low weight but allow for more repetitions.” These items replace one to two pound dumbbells which are sometimes used during circuit workout classes at a fitness center.

As strength is gained, athletes can slowly work their way up to using other household items, such as a bag of flour or sugar, which can weigh around five pounds.

“Listen to your body, never continue an exercise that hurts

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December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 7

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‘Time in a Bottle’ Jim Croce’s signature single Jim Croce One night, Ingrid Croce sat her husband down at the kitchen table on their Pennsylvania farm. For five years, the two A Boomer Blast had tried To The Past in vain to

By RANDAL have a child.

C. HILL That night, though, Ingrid had good news: They were about to become parents.

Jim Croce was so overcome with emotion that he composed “Time in a Bottle” on the table that night, telling how he wished that that fleeting moment of euphoria could last forever: “If I could save time in a bottle “The first thing that I’d like to do “Is to save every day till eternity passes away “Just to spend them with you.”

Of course, as we all know, life doesn’t work that way and that we are given only a certain number of days together:

“But there never seems to be enough time “To do the things you want to do once you find them “I’ve looked around enough to know “That you’re the one I want to go through time with.”

Their blessed event was a boy.

The happy couple named him Adrian.

Jim Croce was a struggling singer/songwriter who first performed with his wife. In 1966, the two recorded an album — “Facets” — and released it on their own Croce Records label.

The disc went nowhere. Three years later, they signed with Capitol Records, but their “Jim and Ingrid Croce” LP met the same fate, and Capitol dropped them.

Jim decided to try his luck as a solo artist, in the meantime driving trucks, working construction and teaching middle school to make ends meet while waiting to make music his full — time occupation.

“Time in a Bottle” ended up on Croce’s first successful album, “You Don’t Mess Around with Jim.” The title track on ABC Records had been a rollicking Top Ten novelty hit, but “Time in a Bottle” ended up

being buried on the second side of the LP. Nobody at ABC Records ever thought of it becoming a 45 someday.

Fast-forward a couple of years, and Jim Croce had become a musical superstar. In September 1973, he and his small backup band were headlining shows at various college campuses in the south. All were scheduled to fly from a venue in Louisiana to another in Texas, but their small chartered plane struck a tree on takeoff from a regional airport, and everyone on board perished.

Adrian Croce had turned 2 years old just eight days earlier.

Coincidentally, one week before the crash, ABC-TV had aired a now-forgotten Movie of the Week. It was called “She Lives!” and starred Desi Arnaz, Jr., in a story of a young woman stricken with cancer. The film’s producers had come across “Time in a Bottle” from Croce’s first hit album and had secured permission to add it to the movie’s soundtrack.

The following day, radio stations were bombarded with callers asking to hear the heartbreaking tune again. ABC Records quickly issued “Time in a Bottle,” which raced to the peak of the Billboard chart and became Croce’s signature single.

INGRID AND JIM CROCE WITH SON ADRIAN. PHOTO FROM JIMCROCE.COM

Professional Forum Interested Businesses Call Cathy Wilson 1-866-580-1138, Ext. 2402 A Monthly Question And Answer Advertorial Column

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Your exclusive opportunity to present common questions or concerns “Adults 50 Years And Better” may have relating to your product(s) or service.

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Q. What are important goals for an estate plan?

A. A comprehensive estate plan is a key component of any successful wealth-building strategy and is an important contribution to the long-term financial well-being of an individual or family. Developing an effective estate plan requires great consideration for both current and future contingencies. Ideally, an effective estate plan should address four primary goals: minimizing estate taxes, ensuring that assets are transferred quickly and efficiently upon death, protecting beneficiaries from creditors or predators, and

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A. Each Senior Life Newspaper is distributed

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These goals provide a strong foundation for your estate plan to withstand life’s events.

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DISCLOSURE: This information is not designed, meant, nor does it constitute the rendering of legal or tax advice. You should consult with your attorney and/or tax advisor before implementing any strategy discussed here. Trust services provided by MEMBERS Trust Company are not federally insured, are not obligations of or guaranteed by the credit union or any affiliated entity, involve investment risks, including the possible loss of principle. MEMBERS Trust Company is a federal thrift regulated by the Office of the Comptroller or the Currency.

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to over 300 locations each month and is free for public pickup and supported by advertisers. Locations for distribution are chosen with the 50+ aged person in mind and include Grocery Stores, Libraries, Senior Centers, Restaurants, Senior Communities, Banks, Apartment Complexes, Doctor Offices, Drug Stores, Farmer’s Market, Resale locations, Churches, Convenient Stores, and Retail Stores.

There are four distinct issues of Senior Life Newspaper including St. Joseph County (extending to LaPorte and Marshall in IN and Berrien & Cass in MI), Elkhart (extending to LaGrange, Noble, Kosciusko and Wabash in IN and St. Joseph MI, Allen (Ft. Wayne) County (extending into DeKalb, Noble, Whitley, Huntington, Wells and Adams Counties), and our Northwest issue covering Lake & Porter Counties. Total distribution each month is 84,150!

Call today for more information on how you can advertise in Senior Life.

Cathy Wilson, Account Executive Serving South Bend and Surrounding Counties (574) 298-8806 1-866-580-1138 Ext. 2402 cwilson@the-papers.com

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8 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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Brain trust I love to walk up and down the bookstore aisles, occasionally removing something from the shelves to sample, IN A hoping it fits NUTSHELL my tastes.

By DICK The people WOLFSIE at Barnes & Noble are totally okay with this, but that habit has gotten me kicked out of Kroger about six times.

Recently, I decided to search the shelves for a book that might help me address a problem I am

facing. My memory is not what it used to be. I tried Prevagen, but that was a total waste of money.

They tout the product as made from jellyfish, one of the few animals in the world with no brain.

I did find one book, “Keep Your Brain Alive: 83 Neurobic Exercises.” For a fathead like me, this is the perfect read. The author contends that there is not enough unpredictability in our lives. We get into a rut because our brains take the easiest paths — the routes we are most accustomed to.

Dr. Larry Katz throws in some cerebral references to axons, dendrites and synapses to make it all sound very scientific, but it was lost on me. On a biology exam in college, I labeled

the parts of the inner ear but it turned out it was a picture of a woman’s reproductive system. I did get partial credit.

This book encourages you to use each of your senses in new and innovative ways. One of the author’s suggestions is to brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand, thus creating new neural pathways. I tried it one night and found the experience instructive. I then used my other hand to clean the toothpaste out of my nose and inside my ear.

In order to enhance your appreciation of good food, said Katz, stick plugs in your ears.

This permits you to fully enjoy what is on your plate, focusing only on taste. I totally forgot to tell Mary Ellen I was doing this

so I didn’t hear a word she said during dinner for almost a week.

Fortunately, she didn’t notice the difference. The book also suggests that to fully experience the texture of food, you should hold your nose when you eat. My wife did notice this on that first night when she had prepared what I assume was a delicious dinner. She was not happy, but I got a nice note from Grub Hub thanking me for all my subsequent take-out orders 10 nights in a row.

There is also a chapter on sex.

Katz encourages you to have a romantic dinner with your partner, and “to be sure to enjoy some flowers and candles.” I choked down a few rose petals, but the candles made me gag. For another novel experience, Katz

suggests you switch cars with a nearby friend for a day so you can have a new tactile experience behind the wheel. Of course, remember to tell your neighbor before you do this, or you can then look forward to really feeling something new: your hands cuffed behind your back.

My favorite suggestion is to eliminate the traditional grocery list. Instead of jotting down the name of each item, write a description instead so you can fully appreciate its qualities. I tried that.

On my shopping list I wrote: “It’s about the size and shape of a soccer ball, tannish, heavily veined and dimpled.” I was talking about a cantaloupe, but it sounded a lot like my rear end.

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and musculoskeletal disorders, cardiac and pulmonary conditions, amputations, and other medically-complex conditions.

Rehabilitation Hospital of Northern Indiana is the only free-standing medical rehabilitation hospital in north-

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ern Indiana and is located at 4807 Edison Lakes Parkway in Mishawaka. The facility features 40 private patient rooms, a 6,000-square-foot therapy gym equipped with advanced rehabilitation equipment, a therapeutic courtyard, and an activity of daily living suite which allows patients to practice daily, at-home activities under the supervision of a health care professional. Activities may include getting in and out of bed, showering, cooking, dressing, doing laundry, and more.

The hospital’s physician-led interdisciplinary health care team works with patients and family members to create individualized treatment plans to maximize recoveries, offering patients the latest in rehabilitative technology and

equipment to enhance treatment options.

Services include physical, occupational, and speech therapy, rehabilitative nursing, respiratory therapy, dietary services, case management, pharmacy services, social work services, pain management and more. In addition, patients are offered home evaluations to identify any necessary modifications that may be needed to ensure a safer return to their homes.

Our goal is to help patients return home safely at their maximum levels of cognitive and physical function so they can get back to the activities that they enjoy.

Contact us at (574) 243-7727 or visit us at our open house from 4:30-7:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 14; see ad in this newspaper.

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Celebrate the holidays with us. Come play “reindeer” games and enter for a chance to win a door prize while learning more about our specialized rehabilitative services. Tour the facility, meet our experienced and caring staff, and warm up with some hot chocolate and cookies. There may even be a surprise appearance by Ol’ St. Nick himself!

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December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 9

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UPDATES & HAPPENINGS IN THE AREA Editor’s note: Send listings of events, for nonprofit organizations only, to Senior Life, P.O. Box 188, Milford, IN 46542, or email Editor Phoebe Muthart by the 15th of every month at pmuthart@the-

papers.com. With the listing, include the contact person, area code and phone number.

RiverBend Cancer Services, 3516 E. Jefferson Blvd., South Bend, offers the following events this month: seated

strength, 10 a.m. Mondays and Wednesdays; general cancer support group, 5:30 p.m.

Wednesday, Dec. 6; Kim’s Bra Boutique, 2 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 13; beginning yarnwork, 10 a.m. Thursdays; chair yoga,

Airports working for your leisure

By CECIL SCAGLIONE Mature Life Features While the airport-airplane experience grows more excruciating, airports around the country are working on some of those rough edges.

Several have introduced therapy dogs to pad around

the terminal to soothe irritated travelers. Others have brought in restaurants that offer relaxed dining. Some even offer day passes so locals can get through the security check point to eat and shop as jetliners swoop by their windows.

Some of the amenities tucked into airports around the

world include movie theaters, ice-skating rinks, wedding reception areas, and swimming pools.

When planning your next trip, you might check to see what airports along the way offer the best pastimes while you’re waiting for takeoff.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

Apartment Living

10:30 a.m. and 11:45 a.m.

Tuesdays and Thursdays; Debbie’s Wig Salon, 1 p.m.

Thursdays; empowered movement, 5:30 p.m. Tuesdays.

—o— Teachers are invited to “Gallery Talks for Teachers,” presented by The History Museum and the Studebaker National Museum. The event provides information about the museum campus’ educational offerings for students.

It is from 4:30-5:30 p.m.

Thursday, Dec. 7; educators can tour The History Museum’s Oliver Mansion.

Each visit will provide a certificate of completion for 2 PGP points, and teachers will

receive corresponding curriculum materials. The event is free; complimentary wine will be offered. To register, contact Stephanie McCune-Bell, director of education, at smccunebell@historymuseumSB. org or (574) 235-9664, ext.

241. The History Museum and the Studebaker National Museum welcome school visits all yearlong. For information, call (574) 235-9664 or visit historymuseumSB.org.

—o— “Winterfest,” 5-8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2, at Ironworks Event Center. The Mishawaka Parks and Recreation Department hosts the annual Winterfest event.

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Faith

Carlock shows love for Jesus by sharing Christ’s Nativity with community

By LAURIE LECHLITNER Staff Writer “I love Jesus, and at Christmastime I have the privilege of sharing that love and his Nativity with the entire community,” stated Steve Carlock. “Each year, I host ‘Bethlehem Revisited’ on my 10 acres of land in South Bend.”

Bethlehem Revisited is a program that tells the story of Mary and Joseph’s journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem and the birth of God’s son Jesus.

Although he loves the Lord now, Carlock was not raised in church.

“My wife, Cindy, was my childhood sweetheart. But because I hung out with an

ornery group of friends, her mom was not crazy about the idea of us dating. When the junior prom rolled around, she told Cindy, ‘You can go out with him just this once - to the prom.

But that’s the last time.’ God had different plans. We’ve been married for 40 years now, have four grown children and 12 grandchildren.”

Cindy is a member of the Church of Christ.

“She led me to faith in Jesus Christ. Of course, I’d always known there was a God. I’d gone to VBS a couple times growing up. But now I wanted a complete understanding of Jesus and a personal relationship with him.”

At his 25th-year high school

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reunion in Hamburg, Iowa, Carlock was voted “Most Changed.”

“The Lord has made a difference in my life. I guess it shows,” he said.

Carlock first became involved in Bethlehem Revisited in October 1988 when his church, Harris Prairie, was hosting the event.

“Through the years, I began to participate in about every area of operations for the project. After five years, I was part of the core group that put the program together. I ran it for 14 years. But when Harris Prairie closed, we thought the program had come to an end,” he noted.

Carlock kept the material as a momentum, even helping a group in Michigan start their own program.

Eventually, the Carlocks wanted to move out of their subdivision and back to the farm.

“We’re both country farm kids at heart. We spotted the perfect property in South Bend; however, it was way beyond our price range.”

The next year, the price dropped.

“Now it was doable. It needed some work, but we could handle that. We purchased it,” he said.

In the fall of that year, when the family was gathered around a roaring fire outside, Carlock’s grown children told him that his home acreage would be the perfect place to host Bethlehem Revisited.

“I was thinking of the 150 to 200 people we needed to run the program and the idea was overwhelming,” he recalled.

GETTING THINGS READY — Steve and Cindy Carlock put the finishing touches on their manger display for “Bethlehem Revisited.”

With the support of Northway Church of Christ, they host the program on their 10 acres of land in South Bend. This year the event takes place Dec. 7-9. Photo provided by Steve Carlock.

God was working on Carlock. “In 2019, both my sister-in-law and mother-inlaw were battling cancer. It hit even closer to home when Cindy was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Between all the radiation treatments and chemotherapies in our family, I did some deep thinking,” he stated.

Carlock got the support of Northway Church of Christ, South Bend, and began building.

Grandparenting good for kids

By JAMES GAFFNEY Mature Life Features One day a year has been set aside to honor a generation that gives of itself 365 days a year.

Most folks can tell you when Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Labor Day and a few other civic holidays fall. But when is Grandparent’s Day? It was signed into officialdom

by President Jimmy Carter.

It’s celebrated annually on the Sunday after Labor Day to honor those unsung heroes and heroines whose many sacrifices have made life easier and better for succeeding generations.

Many people would be puzzled

by the prospect of what to give as a gift. In fact, if one were to ask any grandparent what he or she would like for Grandparents Day, the odds are the reply would be, “Something I can give my grandchildren, something that will make them healthier and happier.”

People forget that what makes grandparents happy is seeing their grandchildren (and their children, of course) happy, experts say.

Reports vary, but consensus tells us that some 10% of children under 18 years of age are cared for totally or at least partially by their grandparents.

Almost 6 million children under

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“We needed lumber to build the Bethlehem Inn. A man called out of the blue and told us he had 16-foot, 10-foot and 8-foot boards he wanted to get rid of. The way God provided was amazing,” he said.

When COVID-19 hit and things were closed during the holidays, Bethlehem Revisited was still running outdoors in the fresh air. This year the event takes place Dec. 7-9.

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18 live in grandparent-headed households.

Grandparents often end up taking care of their grandchildren for long periods of time.

Watching active youngsters can be challenging at any age.

The widespread use of drugs accounts for much of the rising incidence of grandparenting, and nearly half are grandparents without partners and are caring for two or more children.

The rise of the cell phone has made it somewhat easier to keep tabs on the activities and location of youngsters under their grandparents’ care. A growing concern, however, is the fact that children tend to grow away from their grandparents in their teens. But, according to an Oxford University study, maintaining grandparental contact contributes to the child’s well-being.

A commonly held misconception is that grandparents should find parenting easier since they’ve been through it already.

But health, financial and housing restrictions as well as changing cultures belie this view.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 11

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Dining/Leisure/Entertainment

Studebaker Museum features special Indianapolis 500 Race Car The Studebaker National Museum has acquired the No. 34 Studebaker Special, one of the five Studebaker factory-built Indianapolis 500 race cars, which competed in the 1932 and 1933 Indianapolis 500.

Studebaker five-car entry in the 1932 Indianapolis 500 was one of the race’s largest factorybacked efforts. The cars were powered by Studebaker’s 337 cubic-inch, President inline eight cylinder engine and featured other chassis components sourced from Studebaker’s parts bins. The Studebaker team’s top finisher took third place with the rest of the team placing sixth, 13th, 15th, and 16th.

The Studebaker team returned for the 1933 race with new streamlined bodies designed with the aid of a wind tunnel. The No. 34 car finished a team-best seventh, and took home $1,300 in prize money.

The Studebaker Special is the only surviving factory car with its streamlined 1933 coachwork.

After its racing career was over, the car passed through several owners before being acquired by industrial designer Brooks Stevens in 1957. Stevens gave the car an extensive restoration and

placed it in his private museum in Mequon, Wis. In 1996, the Studebaker Special was purchased by August Grasis of Kansas City, Mo., following Stevens’ death. The Grasis family has campaigned the car in numerous vintage racing events since that time, most recently competing in the 2021 Weathertech International Challenge at Road America in Elkhart Lake, Wis. Acquiring a Studebaker Indy Car has been a top priority of the Studebaker National Museum for several decades,” said Studebaker National Museum Executive Director Patrick Slebonick.

“Adding the No. 34 car to the collection allows the museum to connect the history of Indiana’s signature automotive event, the Indianapolis 500, with its most prominent automotive manufacturer. When the opportunity to acquire this remarkable vehicle became available, the local community and Studebaker enthusiasts rallied to make this dream a reality. We are incredibly grateful for all of the generous supporters who made this possible.”

Andrew Beckman, museum archivist, said, “Studebaker’s In-

dianapolis 500 racing team was one of the Speedway’s largest factory-backed campaigns and represents an almost mythical era of Studebaker history. The Studebaker Specials’ competition included entrants from legendary builders Harry Miller and Fred Duesenberg and the team skillfully showcased Studebaker’s top-notch engineering and reliability. This is a day I never thought would come, and am overjoyed to have No. 34 back home in South Bend.”

The car is on display in the museum’s AM General Atrium.

The museum will showcase the Studebaker Special in a special exhibition the summer of 2024.

The Studebaker National Museum is located at 201 Chapin St., South Bend. It is open from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Saturday and noon to 5 p.m. Sunday. Admission is $11 for adults, $9.50 for seniors over 60, and $7 for youth ages 6-18.

For more information, call (574) 235-9714 or toll free at (888) 391-5600 or visit studebakermuseum.org.

For an additional cost, visitors can tour The History Museum, which adjoins the Studebaker National Museum.

The History Museum presents ‘Christmas at Copshaholm’ The community can enjoy the wonder of the Yuletide season during The History Museum’s “Christmas at Copshaholm,” taking place from 4 to 7 p.m.

Sunday, Dec. 3 and 10. Over 15 beautiful Christmas trees are on view throughout the 38room historic house. Festooned fireplace mantels, garlands of greenery on the stairways, and tabletops with holiday décor add to the beauty of the home; note that there are steps leading to the mansion and stairways inside of the house.

Tickets are $15, general; $10, members; $5, youth 6-17; and free, age 5 and under and can be purchased online at historymuseumSB.org.

Tours during Christmas at Copshaholm are self-guided,

providing visitors the rare opportunity to walk through the mansion at their own pace, staying as long as they wish in each room. Docents on each of the three floors are available to answer questions about the home.

Families can have fun with an “Elf-on-the-Copsha-Shelf” scavenger hunt.

It was 125 years ago, in 1897, when J.D. and Anna Oliver and their four children moved into their new home at 808 W. Washington St. in downtown South Bend — Copshaholm, as they would later name it in honor of the Scottish birthplace of J.D.’s father, James. The mansion would be home to the family for the next 75 years. The Oliver family donated the house

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completely intact to The History Museum in 1988. Copshaholm’s furnishings are original, showing the house as it appeared when the family lived there. The historic house is listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

For information, call (574) 235-9664 or visit historymuseumSB.org.

STUDEBAKER INDY CAR — Studebaker National Museum has acquired the No. 34 Studebaker Special, one of the five Studebaker factory-built Indianapolis 500 race cars, which competed in the 1932 and 1933 Indianapolis 500. Photo provided by the museum.

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The winner of the I Spy Contest for November is Lewis Wise of Hammond. The corn was located on page 15 in Senior Life Allen; page 6 in Senior Life Northwest; page 6 in Senior Life Elko and page 9 in Senior Life St. Joseph.

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12 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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The year in review —

Eating well is a form of self-care From My Table To Yours

By Cat Wilson We all need to put our healthcare in the forefront of our busy days, which is easy to say, yet some days are nearly impossible. Right? I am right there with you.

It’s true that every bite improves or damages our health and our fight against disease in the long-term, so let’s recap a few items as we think about the holidays and 2024.

• Constant eating is bad on the gut biome. Your body needs time to digest and use the energy you have consumed already. Fifty percent of Americans eat from 8 a.m. to 10:45

p.m., nearly 15 hours.

• Reduce your eating window to no more than 12 hours by either pushing breakfast to mid-morning or eating earlier in the evening and then being done — nothing else — done.

Do not eat within two hours of going to bed.

• Forget about KETO. Logic alone tells you consuming vast amounts of fat, animal meat and all the cheese you can consume will not make for a healthy body. It is not sustainable, does not give you the micro nutrients you need, it has a higher all-cause mortality rate, causes fatigue, hair loss, and a 30 percent higher rate of birth defects.

• Don’t be afraid of the good, complex whole food carbs like the simple potato or beans; be afraid of simple trashy carbs like over-processed breads, desserts and sugary drinks. You already know this, but it’s hard and they are everywhere.

• Speaking of fiber: per day women need 25 grams and men need 35 grams — minimum.

Get it from food. Eat more plants.

• Sugar — we could talk about it all day. Visualize it — a can of soda has 39 grams of added sugar, divide that by four, it equals nearly 10 teaspoons of sugar in one can! Use that formula for every can, box or package you pick up. Women should get no more than 25 grams (6 teaspoons) a day and men 36 grams (9 teaspoons).

• Table salt is composed primarily of sodium chloride.

Daily recommendation is 2,300 mg per day, which is 1 teaspoon. Only 13 percent of the salt we consume comes from the shaker we use at home. The biggest culprits are restaurants, processed and packaged foods. Be aware.

• Every bite counts — make it be a whole food. Add vegetables to everything. Eat raw and cooked. Fill up with fruit and vegetables and you won’t have room for the high calorie/ low nutrient foods. Make and eat soup all winter long. Make bread that has five ingredients

WHATEVER IS IN THE FRIDGE — This was our ‘whatever’s in the fridge is for dinner bowl’. Warm farro grain, warm broccoli, raspberries, walnuts, tomatoes, power greens, radishes, avocado, cucumbers and feta drizzled with balsamic vinegar. instead of 25 ingredients.

It’s so easy — whole unprocessed food, but the world makes it so hard. Hang in there and be your best self.

Wishing you all good health, happiness, and God’s blessings

in the new year.

Cat Wilson lives in South Bend and transitioned from a vegetarian diet to eating a plant-based diet over two years ago. She may be contacted at cwilson@the-papers.com.

Assisted Living, nursing And rehAbiLitAtion guide

Aperion Care - Arbors Michigan City

1101 E. Coolspring Avenue, Michigan City, IN 46360 (219) 874-5211 • www.aperioncare.com

Heritage Point Assisted Living & Memory Care 1215 Trinity Place, Mishawaka, IN 46545 Phone (574) 247-7400 www.HeritagePointRet.com

Short Term Rehab, Long Term Care, On-Site Therapy 7 Days A Week, Orthopedic Rehab, Post-Stroke Rehab, Nurse Practitioner Oversight, Wound Care, Respiratory Care, IV Therapy, Cardiac Rehab, Newly Remodeled Communities, Memory Care

Cardinal Nursing & Rehabilitation Center

1121 E. LaSalle Avenue, South Bend, IN 46617 (574) 287-6501 • www.asc.com

Licensed Memory Care Assisted Living: Industry Leaders and Experts with 20+ years Proven Expertise in Memory Care Exclusive Meaningful Moments® Program Designed for Residents with Memory Loss. 24-Hour Nursing, Private, Semi-Private and Companion Rooms, Respite Care, Pet Therapy.

Holy Cross Village at Notre Dame

54515 933 N., P.O. Box 706, Notre Dame, IN 46556 (574) 287-1838 • www.holycrossvillage.com

Rehabilitation Unit, Alzheimer’s Unit, Skilled Licensed Nursing Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-Occupational-Physical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private/Semi-Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Medicare and/or Medicaid

Creekside Village 1420 East Douglas, Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 307-7200 • www.ASCSeniorCare.com

Dujarie House, Independent Living, Assisted Living, Respite Care, Rehabilitation Unit, Alzheimer’s Unit, Skilled Licensed Nursing, Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-Occupational-Physical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Residential Apartments

Hubbard Hill Retirement Community

28070 CR 24 ., Elkhart, IN 46517 (574) 295-6260 • www.hubbardhill.org

Short Term Rehabilitation-to-Home Specialization featuring Medicare and Managed Care Skilled Nursing Services and State-of-the-Art Physical, Occupational and Speech Therapies. Outpatient Therapy.

Beautiful Private and divided Semi-private rooms. Comprehensive Care for longer stays. Pet visitation encouraged.

Hamilton Grove

31869 Chicago Trail, New Carlisle, IN 46552-0836 (574) 654-2200 • www.greencroft.org/hamiltongrove

A Greencroft Communities Affiliate

Healthwin

Rehabilitation, Healthcare, Assisted Living, Memory Care, Maintenance Free Homes, Licensed, Locally Owned, Non-Profit, Faith Based, Physical, Occupational, Speech Therapies, Memory Care Support Group, Pet Friendly, There’s No Place Like Hubbard Hill

Majestic Care of South Bend

52654 N. Ironwood Road, South Bend, IN 46635 (574) 277-8710 • www.Majesticcare.com Rehabilitation Unit, Skilled Licensed Nursing, Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-Occupational- Respiratory-Physical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private/Semi-Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Medicare and/or Medicaid

Independent Living, Assisted Living, Rehabilitation, Skilled Licensed Nursing, On-site Therapies, Long Term Care and Respite Care.

Maintenance Free Living, HUD and accepting the Medicaid Waiver

Morningview Assisted Living Residences 20531 Darden Road, South Bend, IN 46637 (574) 272-0100 • www.healthwin.org A Specialized Care Facility. Rehabilitation Unit, Skilled Licensed Nursing, Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-Occupational-Respiratory-Physical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private/Semi-Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Medicare and/or Medicaid

475 North Niles Avenue, South Bend, IN 46617 (574) 246-4123 • www.morningview-alf.com ASSISTED LIVING RESIDENCES

A Sterling Healthcare Community

Spacious studio apartments at affordable rates. Services available based on your needs. Respite Care, Physical, Occupational & Speech Therapies, Medicaid Waiver accepted. Quality Care for Quality Life.

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 13

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

Finance

Should I create a trust and if so, what type of trust best suits my needs?

By RYAN HAHN Trust Administrator Establishing a trust is an important part of financial planning and will transfer your assets to loved ones according to your wishes.

Trusts come in different types, so it is important to weigh the pros and cons of each before deciding which might best suit your needs. For example, each type has different tax

implications and legal requirements, as well as details about who can become a trustee.

It is also important to consider what type of assets will be placed into the trust, such as cash or real estate, along with any other investments that may need to be included.

Lastly, make sure you review all the relevant laws for your jurisdiction prior to deciding on a particular type of trust.

Taking all these factors into

consideration will go a long way toward helping you decide if forming a trust is necessary and which specific type best suits your needs.

There are a few different types of trusts that one might consider when forming an estate plan: • Revocable living trust.

• Irrevocable living trust.

• Special needs trust.

• Charitable remainder trust.

Contact us to learn more about which trust would be best for you and your specific situation. Contact Ryan Hahn, trust administrator, Wealth Management Center, 110 S. Main St., South Bend, or call (574) 284-6210, Ext. 6232.

Disclosure This information is not designed, meant, nor does it constitute the rendering of legal or tax advice. You should consult with your attorney and/or

tax advisor before implementing any strategy discussed here. Trust services provided by MEMBERS Trust Company are not federally insured, are not obligations of or guaranteed by the credit union or any affiliated entity, involve investment risks, including the possible loss of principle. MEMBERS Trust Company is a federal thrift regulated by the Office of the Comptroller or the Currency.

Funeral’s financial side

By CECIL SCAGLIONE Mature Life Features The topic is usually difficult or uncomfortable to introduce, but once you get talking about it, the conversation flows easier.

We’re talking about planning your funeral and those for your loved ones.

Dealing with the loss of a loved one is stressful and distracting enough without having to make arrangements and follow rituals for the treatment and disposal of the dead person’s remains.

Modern-day sociologists suggest you might consider planning your funeral as a gift to your children.

They won’t have to deal with it.

It assuages the guilt and anger that accompanies the grief you experience when a dear one dies, and eliminates the need

to consider logistics and costs tossed at you by professionals whose business is to plan and put together funerals and all their pricey trimmings.

Pre-planning your funeral or that of our spouse is just that. You plan exactly what you want done, whether it’s a lavish cortege to the cemetery or a quiet gathering around your remains in an urn after cremation.

And it’s prepaid. All that has to be made after one’s death is a phone call.

You should also have a phonetree of some sort fashioned if you feel there will be a sizable crowd at your service.

If you don’t feel this plan works, the least you can do it write down your plan and make copies for family members and your team of financial advisors.

This eliminates one worry that occurs if you have a prepaid funeral plan: will that funeral home named still be in business when you pass way?

Finding a reliable funeral home is a chore all its own.

There are stories galore about unscrupulous operators who over-charge grieving survivors for providing funeral and burial services. Doing this while you have time and not being pressed to put the body to rest gives you much more assurance that things will go as you wish.

You can check with friends who have dealt with recent deaths and visit the funeral operators involved. Shop around just as you would for a house or car. Go over their list of services offered and the charges and fees for each.

There are many components to consider. A partial list includes the type of disposal of the body – cremation or an expensive coffin, embalming and cosmetics applied to the remains, facilities rental for any service, transportation of the body and headstone.

You get the idea.

If you feel pressured, leave and

keep on shopping. If possible, have a member of your family — one who will be responsible for arrangements after your death — to accompany you. This can save everyone a lot of money as well as a lot of added grief, at a time when they’re burdened with the grief of a dear one’s death.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

Assisted Living, nursing And rehAbiLitAtion guide

Primrose Retirement Community of Mishawaka 820 Fulmer Road, Mishawaka, IN 46544 (574) 259-3211 • primroseretirement.com

Signature HealthCARE of Bremen

316 Woodies Lane, Bremen, IN 46506 (574) 546-3494 • SHCofBremen.com

Our spacious independent and assisted living apartments offer something to retire to not just something to retire from. Residents at Primrose enjoy a healthy and active living environment.

Bremen

Riveridge Rehabilitation & Healthcare Center

Southfield Village

1333 Wells Street, Niles, MI 49120 (269) 684-1111 • www.riveridgerehab.com

6450 Miami Circle, South Bend, IN 46614 (574) 231-1000 • www.greencroft.org

Riveridge Rehab in Niles, Michigan, offers newly renovated rehab units with 4 private suites. Additionally, we have a locked memory care unit with multi-sensory room.

Saint Joseph Health System - Holy Cross 17475 Dugdale Drive, South Bend, IN 46635 (574) 247-7500 • www.sjmed.com

HOLY CROSS

Offering Rehabilitation and Nursing Care services for seniors, Sanctuary at Holy Cross focuses on wellness for the body, mind and spirit. Our therapies include: aqua, speech, occupational, physical, and therapeutic recreation.

Advertise Your Community Here!

Contact Cathy Wilson For More Details!

(574) 298-8806 1-866-580-1138 Ext. 2402 cwilson@the-papers.com

Skilled Licensed Nursing, Rehabilitation Unit, Alzheimer’s & Dementia Secured Unit, Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-OccupationalPhysical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private/Semi-Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Full-Time Chaplain.

(Formerly Bremen Health Care)

Independent Living, Assisted Living, Rehabilitation Unit, Skilled Licensed Nursing, Intermediate Care, Therapies: Speech-OccupationalRespiratory-Physical, Long Term Care, Respite Care, Private/ Semi-Private Rooms, Pet Visitation Allowed, Residential Apartments, Medicare and/or Medicaid

St. Paul’s 3602 S. Ironwood Dr., South Bend, IN 46614 (574) 284-9000 • www.sjmed.com/st-pauls St. Paul’s, a Saint Joseph Health System Life Plan Community in South Bend, provides continuing care that is faith-based, hospitality-rich and wellness-focused. A variety of living options includes affordable Independent Living and Assisted Living apartments and secure Memory Care.

Tanglewood Trace Senior Living 530 Tanglewood Lane, Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 277-4310 www.tanglewoodtraceseniorliving.com Offering Retirement Villas, Independent and Licensed Assisted Living, Therapy Services, Respite Care, Social and Recreational Activities, Pets Welcome, Transportation, Beauty Shop and Spa Services Available.

14 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

INDEPENDENCE | DIGNITY | STRENGTH 1151 South Michigan Street | South Bend, Indiana 46601 | (574) 233-8205 | www.realservices.org

Aging in Place: Growing Older at Home Many people want the same things as they get older: to stay in their own homes, to maintain independence for as long as possible, and to turn to family and friends for help when needed.

Staying in your own home as you get older is called “aging in place.”

But many older adults and their families have concerns about safety, getting around, or other daily activities. Living at home as you age requires careful consideration and planning.

Support for aging at home Home�based care includes health, personal, and other support services to help you stay at home and live as independently as possible. In�home services may be short�term — for someone who is recovering from an operation, for example — or long�term, for people who need ongoing help.

In many cases, home�based support is provided at home by informal caregivers, such as Planning ahead for aging in family members, friends, and place neighbors. It can also be supplemented by formal The best time to think about how caregivers and community to age in place is before you need services. a lot of care. Planning ahead allows you to make important decisions while you are still able. Help you can receive at home includes: The first step is to think about the  kinds of help you need now and might want in the future. You can learn about home�based care and other services in your community and find out what they cost.

Planning ahead also gives you time to set up your home to meet your needs as you age.

Another step is to consider any illnesses, such as diabetes or heart disease, that you or your spouse might have. Find out about how the illness could make it hard for someone to get around or take care of themselves in the future. Your health care provider can help answer your questions.



 

Talk with your family, friends, and other caregivers about what  support is needed for you to stay in your home. Be realistic and plan to revisit the decision as your needs change over time.

Personal care: Help with everyday activities, also called “activities of daily living,” including bathing, dressing, grooming, using the toilet, eating, and moving around — for example, getting out of bed and into a chair Household chores: Housecleaning, yard work, grocery shopping, laundry, and similar chores around the house Meals: Shopping for food and preparing nutritious meals Money management: Tasks such as paying bills and filling out health insurance forms Health care: Help with many aspects of health care, including giving medications, caring for wounds, helping with medical equipment, and





providing physical therapy Transportation: Assistance getting around, such as rides to the doctor’s office or grocery store Safety: Home safety features and help in case of a fall or other emergency

Making your home safe and accessible There are a variety of ways to make your surroundings safer and easier to manage so they meet your needs as you age. Go through your home room by room to identify potential problems and safety issues. First, correct any immediate dangers, such as loose stair railings and poor lighting, and then work on other ways to ensure you will be as safe as possible at home.

Are you worried that making changes might be expensive? You may be able to get help paying for repairs and safety updates to your home.

�

Source: nia.nih.gov

�

�

REAL Services, believing in the dignity of all people, will provide services without regard to race, age, color, religion, sex, gender identity, disability, national origin, ancestry, political affiliation or belief, familial status or status as a veteran.

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 15

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

INDEPENDENCE | DIGNITY | STRENGTH The tenant of DIGNITY At its most basic, the concept of human dignity is the belief that all people hold a special value that's tied solely to their humanity. It has nothing to do with their class, race, gender, religion, abilities, or any other factor other than them being human.

8 ways to promote dignity in caring for another…

1. Let people choose their own clothing 2. Involve them in decisions relating to their care

Thank you to those who participated in our 2023 Elves for Elders program by donating money or gift cards to seniors and disabled individuals in need!

Our program participants are truly thankful for your generosity.

You don’t have to wait for next year’s campaign. If you’d like to designate the Elves for Elders program simply do so on our giving page, or designate it on your check. All of the money from this campaign goes directly to the participants!

3. Address the person appropriately 4. Make food look appealing and tasty 5. Respect personal space and possessions

There is an on-going need for REAL volunteers.

Would you like to give an hour of your time for your neighbors in need?

6. Hygiene and personal care 7. Promote social activities 8. Engage in conversation

Join us in 2024!

Call: (574) 284-7138

Being treated with dignity makes us all feel like valuable human beings.

E-mail: voluteer@realservices.org -

St Joseph County Mishawaka: 100 Center Hi-Rise Konnie (574) 259-1611 Battell Center 904 N Main St (574) 256-2325 North Liberty: 300 S. Main St. Belinda (574) 284-7179 Osceola: United Methodist Church

South Bend: Sanctuary at Trinity Towers 316 S. St Joseph St Anita (574) 234-7278 Farington Apartments 1220 Farington Circle Don Johnson (574) 291-5597 Karl King Riverbend Tower 515 E Monroe David (574) 232-4934 Charles Black Center 3419 W Washington Aurelia (574) 235-9446

421 Beech Rd Grace (574) 674-6503

Heritage Place at LaSalle Square

Walkerton: 606 Washington St.

1ROOF 405 E. Dubail Ave. Terri (574) 381-8981

Jackie (574) 334-1047

3224 Ardmore Trail Dorothy (574) 286-0916

LaPorte County LaPorte: Cambridge Square Apt. 1111 Longwood Dr Bldg B (219) 380-1885 Michigan City: Simeon Square 1207 S Woodland Jerri (219) 380-1439 SMRT Center 301 Grant Ave Jill (219) 872-0942

Marshall County Argos: B & R Community Bldg 152 S Michigan St Becky (574) 892-9669 Bourbon: Senior Center on North Harris, Jan (574) 342-7031 Bremen: Oakhaven Apartments 500 S Montgomery St Gary (574) 993-2944 Plymouth: Garden Court West 400 W. Washington St Linda (574) 935-0047

This program is funded in part by Indiana Family & Social Services Administration, Division of Aging, under the federal Older Americans Act and Older Hoosiers Act, as well as local grants and donations.

16 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

Grief can be managed

By CECIL SCAGLIONE Mature Life Features One of life’s cruelest blows is the loss of a loved one.

The death of a spouse, sibling or special friend over the holiday season can be more devastating.

It not only destroys the merriment and mirth of the annual celebration, it burns in a sad memory for all future commemorations.

The first thing you have to do is face the fact that you’re mourning. Don’t fight your feelings as they gush onto you. They’ll range from self-pity to anger at the entire universe. They may strike right away or lay in wait to spring out at some unexpected later date. How long they last can be up to you.

Most everyone — experts as well as those who have experienced such a loss — suggest you conjure up and catalog the pleasant memories and consider how lucky you are to have had that person enrich your life. Be thankful for the happy times as you recall them.

Monitor your actions to help pull yourself out of your mournful state. Keep trying to have the best day you can, because your feeling of loss is not going to go away. Celebrate your advances as you manage your grief.

You may never whistle or hum a happy tune again, but don’t feel guilty when you finally get through the day without feeling tired all the time.

Returning to your daily rou-

tine will help get you closer to normalcy — eat, sleep, and exercise like you used to. Go shopping, have coffee with friends, and call relatives like you used to.

If somebody in your circle is experiencing the same loss, reach out and share some time with them. Talking about your loss, and theirs, can help both of you climb out of grief.

There’s no need to place the deceased person on a pedestal.

The simple thing to remember is that they were your friend and you enjoyed time together.

You’re managing your grief well if you catch yourself smiling or laughing again.

There are many support groups dedicated to helping you through your mourning period. If your loved one died of a disease or accident,

there likely is an organization linked to that particular event or disability that can provide

comfort and counsel to get you through your trying time.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

FOR LISTING CALL CATHY AT 1-866-580-1138 EXT. 2402

HEALTH SERVICES DIRECTORY AGING & WELLNESS RESOURCES

AGING CONNECTIONS Serving Northern IN & Southwest MI

A free online directory for aging & wellness resources. Our members offer a wide variety of services and information for your specific needs.

www.agingconnections.org

Hover over Chapters on the navigation bar, then select your area and click directory.

DAY CENTER

SAINT JOSEPH PACE 250 East Day Rd., Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 247-8700 saintjosephPACE@trinity-health.org Helping seniors live safely at home.

PACE’s main objective is to keep seniors out of nursing homes.

Aging Connections is a 501(c)(3) Nonprofit Organization

HEARING AID CENTER

HOME CARE SERVICES

ALWAYS BEST CARE - MICHIANA 310 N. Ironwood Dr. South Bend, IN 46615 (574) 232-8487 www.abc-michiana.com Leaders in Non-Medical Home Care.

VA Provider.

Indiana Medicaid Waiver Provider.

Michigan Medicaid Provider.

Private Pay. Long-term Care Insurance.

Veterans Care Bridge.

See Our Ad In This Issue

ALZHEIMERS/MEMORY CARE

NORTH WOODS VILLAGE AT EDISON LAKES 1409 E. Day Road, Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 247-1866 www.northwoodsmemorycare.com

See Our Ad In This Issue

NIHC - NORTHERN INDIANA HEARING CENTER 2406 Mishawaka Ave., South Bend, IN 46615 (574) 383-5595 Willow Creek Office Center 3179 Willow Creek Road, Portage, IN 46368

Starting at $895 each.

Free Hearing test & evaluation.

Full service hearing provider.

We honor most health insurance including United, EPIC, Medicare Supplement & AARP hearing provider.

WE DO NOT SELL AMPLIFIERS

COMFORT KEEPERS 6910 N. Main St., Ste. 3, Unit 47 Granger, IN 46530 (574) 277-4121, (574) 327-6123 www.southbendin.comfortkeepers.com

Provides In-Home Care Services through our interactive caregiving approach, personal care, companionship and housekeeping, transportation, respite care, dementia care.

DENTISTS

HERITAGE POINT ASSISTED LIVING & MEMORY CARE 1215 Trinity Place, Mishawaka, IN 46545 Phone (574) 247-7400 www.HeritagePointRet.com Licensed Memory Care 24 Hr. Nursing Respite Care

PRINCESS CITY DENTAL CARE 2006 N. Main St., Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 259-8571 www.pcdentalcare.com

Emphasis On Complete, Compassionate Care. Member American Society Of Geriatric Dentistry.

HOME INSTEAD 3025 Grape Rd. Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 256-1479 www.homeinstead.com/343

From companionship to transportation to loving care, to us it’s personal.

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 17

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

High flyers pay high-flying fares

By CECIL SCAGLIONE Mature Life Features Covering the airline industry as a business writer for a daily newspaper and then working for an airline company before opening my own company taught me one thing: Flying is not and never has been considered fun by the airline folk. All you are is an empty seat if you aren’t in their airplane.

Flying is not their full-time job. Getting you to fill one of their seats — marketing — is their full-time job.

Pricing is their major tool.

They’ve gone all out to make it as attractive as possible. This is nothing new. A seat is a commodity and prices rise and fall with demand. Demand tightens up as boarding time approaches.

A seat selling for $300 when booked on the internet book a couple of weeks ahead of time can be bumped up to $600 or $700 at boarding time after having dropped to $89 just 24 hours before the plane’s scheduled departure.

Decades ago, a writer for a major national magazine spoke to every passenger aboard a household name airline and discovered there were more than 100 different fares paid by his fellow flyers.

Today’s airlines boast about being more than economical than ever. That’s because they can advertise an attractive fare that fills the seat but doesn’t include all the ancillary fees – service charges, luggage charges, carryon charges, seat-selection charges and on-and-on charges.

Self-described “discount”

airlines proclaim dirt cheap fares to deliver you to faraway places.

Your dreamscape crumbles to reality when you learn how much it costs to take a bag with you.

The charge you see is usually what your seat costs when you sit in it without anything with you — no bags, no pets, no food and in a seat they give you, not one you picked.

A British website that listed several examples of fares and final price differences showed a flight advertising a fare of slightly more than $20 was loaded with hidden costs of just over $160.

An airline may offer a cheap fare but, to get it, you have to join their travelers club, which has an annual fee and probably an up-front enrollment charge.

There’s an item called carrierinterface fee. This reportedly

covers all the technology and interface connection used to book your flight online. You can avoid this by buying your ticket at the airport, they report.

Have we mentioned the hidden airport fee? And taxes and security charges? Don’t think working with airline personnel will save you money because there’ll be an agent fee slipped into the total.

Airline marketers sales-talk

their way through complaints by proclaiming the flying public likes to see those lower fares.

And that competitive juices force airlines to keep their fares low. But they say nothing about keeping their fees low, such as escalating charges for seat selection and carry-on luggage and on and on. Those fees skyrocket if you book an overseas trip.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

Prescription Delivery

In St. Joseph County 606 N. Main St., Mishawaka, IN 46545

Mon.-Fri. 9-6 • Sat. 9-2

PROVIDING MEDICATION THERAPY MANAGEMENT (MTM)

• Comprehensive Review Of Prescriptions And Their Possible Interaction Of Side Effects • Coordinating With Prescribers • Do You Take Several Medications Prescribed By More Than 1 Doctor?

Call Today To Schedule A Review 574-255-2988

FOR LISTING CALL CATHY AT 1-866-580-1138 EXT. 2402

HEALTH SERVICES DIRECTORY HOME HEALTHCARE AGENCY

NORACARE 1251 N. Eddy Street, Suite 200 South Bend, IN 46617 (574) 222-5992 info@noracare.us www.noracare.us

Access experienced health professionals to support your home healthcare needs at affordable rates. We accept long-term care insurance.

HOSPICE CARE

CENTER FOR HOSPICE CARE 501 Comfort Pl., Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 243-3100 112 South Center Street, Plymouth (574) 935-4511 22579 Old U.S. 20 East, Elkhart (574) 264-3321 309 W. Johnson Rd., Suite A, LaPorte, IN 46350 (219) 575-7930 1-800-HOSPICE (467-7423) Serving area patients & families since 1980. www.CFHcare.org

INDEPENDENT SENIOR LIVING

THE VILLAGE AT ARBORWOOD 820 Cleveland Rd. East Granger, IN 46530 (574) 247-4680 www.villageatarborwood.com

RETIREMENT COMMUNITY

HAMILTON GROVE 31869 Chicago Trail New Carlisle, IN 46552-0836 (574) 654-2200

A Lifestyle You Deserve, An Apartment You Can Afford.

See Our Ad In This Issue

TELEPHONE SERVICES

MEDICAL CLINIC

NORTHSHORE HEALTH CENTERS Locations in Portage, Lake Station, Chesteron, Merrillville, Hammond, LaPorte & DeMotte By appt. or walk-ins welcome.

(219) 763-8112 or (888) 459-2349 www.northshorehealth.org Affordable medical and urgent care regardless of ability to pay. Medicare, Medicaid, commercial insurance accepted.

Discounted self-pay option.

RELAY INDIANA - INTRAC 7702 Woodland Drive #130, Indianapolis, IN 46278 (877) 446-8722

Problems hearing on the telephone? We provide captioned telephones to assist you to read what the other person is saying. No more garbled or misunderstood conversations. Simply, READ what you’re hearing.

See Our Ad In This Issue

THERAPY/CARE MGT. SERVICES

HEART TO HEART HOSPICE 620 Edison Rd., Suite 122 Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 855-4475 hearttohearthospice.com

Compassionate care from our heart to yours.

Volunteers needed.

CHAP Accredited

SENIOR OUTPATIENT SERVICES 1220 E. Jackson Blvd.

Elkhart, IN 46516 (574) 333-9747 kate@senioropservices.net

Senior Outpatient Services is a mobile outpatient practice providing PT, OT, ST services to seniors in their homes.

18 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

www.seniorlifenewspapers.com

Travel through time in Cape May

By PHYLLIS HOCKMAN Mature Life Features

Look up!

That’s my one bit of advice to visitors to Cape May, NJ. But first, a little history.

Cape May is the nation’s oldest seashore resort. It has been catering to vacationers since pre-Revolutionary days.

Its shady tree-lined streets and colorful homes became the playground of presidents. Ulysses S. Grant, Franklin Pierce, James Buchanan, Chester Arthur and Benjamin Harrison all sought refuge there from the humidity of District of Columbia summers.

Although the town grew beyond its colonial trappings, it became stuck in the late-19th century Victorian Era when it was rebuilt after being razed by fire for the third time. With more than 600 structures, most of which have been refurbished, Cape May has been designated a National Landmark City, the

ARCHITECTURE — Most of the architecture in Cape May is styled in shades of browns, greens and mauves.

Photo by Victor Block.

CAPE MAY DIAMONDS — Cape May diamonds are semi-precious quartz stones that resemble cubic zirconia diamonds. They’re found along the water’s edge. Photo by Victor Block. only U.S city to be designated entirely as a national historic district.

Street after street and house after house enchants, charms and captivates visitors intrigued by the intricate detail that distinguishes one from the other.

Despite the similarity in

architectural style, there is infinite variety in their presentation. Most of the homes, ablaze in multiple shades of browns, greens and mauves, sport some strange appendage on the roof alternately identified as a turret, cupola, gazebo, or belvedere. This is why you look up.

So many of the interesting adornments — the extra little touches — are near the roof as well as everywhere else.

Wraparound porches adorned with decorative balustrades and whimsically designed gingerbreading give each structure its distinctive personality. Bay windows are surrounded by individualized brackets and barge boards that vary in size, detail and decor.

Help is just a phone call away!

CapTel™ Captioned Telephone – The Amplified Telephone that includes Written, Word-for-Word Captions of Everything the Caller Says!

Service provided by InTRAC and phones available at no charge to those who qualify.

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The diversity of the slits, slices, slats and slots that contributes to the intricacy of design defining each structure is bound to fascinate even those who have never given a single thought to architectural motif. As one guide summed up the Victorian philosophy: “If a little is good, more is better, and too much is still not enough.”

The Washington Street Mall, a pedestrian walkway in the center of town, is reminiscent of what a beach-town boardwalk might have been like in the 1890s. The outdoor benches, cafes and shops decked out in their Victorian finery reflect an earlier easier era.

To personalize the transformation in time, walk down Hughes Street after dark. Its only illumination, provided by gas lamps — and occasionally, the moon — lets you picture yourself returning to a time when life was simpler, the pace was slower, the streets safer and all was well with the world, even if just for the moment.

Cape May recently found some new history to celebrate. The Harriet Tubman Museum opened in 2021 in a neighborhood that was not only the center of the African-American community but played an outsize role in the abolitionist movement in the mid19th century, spearheaded by Ms. Tubman herself. After attaining her freedom, she worked as a hotel maid here to earn money to finance her journeys farther south to help free more slaves.

For bird-watching addicts, nearly 400 species of birds fly in during peak migration periods to be added to sightings lists.

Cape May is listed as one of the top 10 birding hot spots in North America.

Its singularity doesn’t end there. There’s also the Diamond Droop at Sunset Beach in Delaware Bay. Cape May diamonds are semiprecious quartz stones that resemble cubic zirconia diamonds.

They’re found along the water’s edge. Dull and cloudy when dry, they become bright and translucent when wet. Jewelry made from the stones after they have been cut and polished has been featured on the QVC Television Shopping Network, but you don’t have to tune in to get some.

You can take your shoreline stash to the Sunset Beach Gift Shop and they’ll tell you how you can have a brooch or pair of earrings made to order.

And there’s always the reminder of why you came here — the beach. Several miles of rolling waves and white sand — very white sand.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 19

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Revenge of the nerd Just weeks before her untimely death in 1970, singer Janis Joplin made one final journey back to her

By RANDAL native Port C. HILL Arthur, Texas, this time for her 10-year reunion at Jefferson Davis High School.

The 27-year-old superstar had fled small-town life as a social outcast but was returning as a counterculture icon.

Weeks before the reunion, she had appeared on The Dick Cavett Show, where she claimed she had been “laughed out of class, out of town and out of the state.”

Moving to San Francisco, her career had skyrocketed after she began fronting the allmale band Big Brother and the Holding Company, her mezzosoprano voice blasting out such blues-based classics as “Ball and Chain” and “Piece of My Heart.”

In high school, Joplin had been a whip-smart student — she belonged to the Future Teachers Club and graduated from Jefferson David a year early — but was never accepted by the peers who had always called the social shots. Often seen as a reclusive eccentric on campus, she once said, “I was a misfit. I read. I painted. I thought.”

Joplin hung out with other teenagers on the school’s social periphery. One particular pal was a collector of record albums by such blues artists as Bessie Smith, Billie Holiday and Big Mama Thornton. (In 1953, Thornton had cut the original “Hound Dog.”) At 17, while showering at home one night, something happened that changed Joplin’s life: “I discovered I had this incredibly loud voice!” Later, she said, “I started singing blues because that was always what I liked.”

The head of the 1970 reunion committee who had mailed the get-together announcement had insisted to newspaper journalists, “This is NOT a

reception for Janis Joplin.”

Janis, though, made a regal entrance that night, surrounded by bodyguards, reporters and paparazzi.

Many of her former classmates were no doubt shocked to see the girl they had once teased mercilessly hadn’t just overcome their tormenting, she had become everything they would never be. (Joplin had admitted that she was attending to see “all those kids who are still working in gas stations and driving dry-cleaning trucks while I’m making $50,000 a night.”)

Janis had arrived with purple and pink feathers crowning her head, oversized rose-tinted glasses framing her acne-scarred face, and bracelets jangling on both wrists. She was welcomed by some, but she also felt the chill of those who stood apart, much as they had before, and made comments about her. One of them asked her “what she had been up to” for the past decade?

At evening’s end, Joplin was given a car tire, a gag gift offered to the attendee who had

JANIS JOPIN ON APRIL 5, 1969.

PHOTO FROM EVENING STANDARD/GETTY IMAGES traveled the furthest distance that day.

Two months later, Janis Joplin died from a heroin overdose, alone in a Los Angeles motel on a Saturday night. Four months later, she had the Number One

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20 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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Sterling Health Care —

Offers Briarcliff Health Rehabilitation, The Milton Home and Morningview

By STERLING HEALTH CARE Editor’s Note: Sterling Health Care specializes in the management of several Midwestern health care communities that are charged with helping individuals and families in the South Bend region. Its community of assisted and skilled nursing facilities offers a variety of rehabilitative and ongoing care options for those looking for assisted living and memory care, Alzheimer’s and dementia care, or skilled nursing and post-

surgical rehabilitation. These include Briarcliff Health and Rehabilitation, The Milton Home and Morningview Assisted Living Residences.

Despite all the technology, medications, and therapies, great care comes down to the energy put in by our staff. It does not matter if you are a nurse, a cook, a housekeeper, or a maintenance person. We are one team, and you win as a team or lose as a team.

At Sterling, we are rededicating ourselves to basic core values,

which will be the difference in giving such great care and a great atmosphere for your loved one. Whethwer it be short-term rehab, long-term care, assisted living or dementia care, it is all about the people.

First: We care. It starts from something as simple as coming on time to a shift so that someone finishing a shift can go home on time or saying a kind word to your fellow co-worker.

When you see something wrong, point it out but do not look down on them. Educate and reinforce

good habits. A smile is worth a thousand words.

Second: Excellence. We take for granted that people know what is expected. Don’t. Ask your supervisor for feedback. Ask if you could be doing something better or different. Give off positive energy. It takes three acts of positive energy to overcome one negative comment or bad feeling.

To be excellent, you must feel on a mission of excellence. This requires positive energy.

Finally: Why are we here? To take care of people. Every person

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Feel free to explore the continuing care living community at Chicago Trail Village! Alleviate the hassles of homeownership while having priority access to assisted living and healthcare. Here, you don’t have to worry about mowing the lawn, replacing broken appliances, or even snow removal. Maintenance-free living means we take care of it so you don’t have to! Best of all: rent is based on income. Your new home is waiting for you!

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who comes to us has an ache and pain, has gone through surgery, or has dementia and is on some medication, therapy or even dialysis. We can make them feel better or we can make them feel worse. When a family member visits, they just want to know someone cares. Let us show we care.

Relieve ankle arthritis pain

By CECIL SCAGLIONE Mature Life Features The pain and debilitation caused by arthritic ankles can be treated several ways now, according to the American College of Foot and Ankle Surgeons.

Unlike hips or knees, where arthritis comes from normal wear and tear, arthritic ankles usually are precipitated by a previous injury, such as a fracture or sprain that has caused long-term ligament and cartilage damage. Pain in an arthritic joint that can limit movement occurs as cartilage deteriorates and gets thinner.

The ankle bones lose their protective covering and may eventually rub together, causing pain and inflammation.

Patients with mild arthritis can be treated with cortisone shots to relieve inflammation and with ankle braces to support movement.

Minimal arthroscopic surgery can remove motioninhibiting cartilage fragments and painful bone spurs.

Mature Life Features Copyright 2023

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December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 21

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History Museum opens 1950s African American worker’s home An exciting change is coming is open daily except for major reflecting the diversity of the to The History Museum. The holidays from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. community.

Worker’s Home on the museum’s Monday to Saturday, and noon to For information, call The Hiscampus is undergoing a transfor- 5 p.m. Sunday. tory Museum at (574) 235-9664 mation. It will continue its misThe Worker’s Home was built or visit historymuseumSB.org. sion since first opening in 1994 in the 1870s and was moved to WORKERS HOME — The 1950s to tell the history of workers the property of J.D. Oliver in African American Worker’s Home and their families, with special 1907, where a succession of Olihas undergone a transformation attention to the many ethnicities ver domestic staff lived until the and is now open to the public. It of the St. Joseph River Valley mid-1980s. tells the story of the community’s Region.

In 1992, it was moved to its African American history, as well The home will be interpreted present location. When the as the home of a 1950s African Worker’s Home opened in 1994, it as the Great Migration and the Civil American family. The commuwas interpreted as a 1930s Polish Rights Movement, through guided tours and special programs. Photo nity’s African American history, family’s home. In years to come, provided by The History Museum. as well as the Great Migration it will undergo another iteration and the Civil Rights Movement, will be told through guided tours and special programs. Furniture, furnishings, photographs, and surrounded by their loved ones. blessing. Even small happenings is power in calling a friend or

By GAYLA J. KONANZ, other materials in the home will Financial limitations may stop are blessings and can bring joy. family member or sending a MSW, LCSW reflect those periods in history. them from blessing grandchilWhen we focus on the blesspersonal greeting to brighten Always Best Care “We had long recognized the dren with gifts. And the loss of ings in our lives, we can then someone’s day. When we give joy, need to better connect with and loved ones is front and center be fueled by the joy and turn it we receive it back and that is During the holiday season, represent local African American around the holidays. into blessings for others. There wonderful. a well-beloved Christmas song history. The transformation of It is okay to grieve during calls it, “The most wonderful the Worker’s Home to reflect an this season. It’s okay to be mad, time of the year.” The question African American family seemed broken, in despair; to cry for really is, “Is it?” like a logical step to further this what you have lost. It’s what you I think we really want this goal. We sought and received an should do, even if your loved one season to be the best. We want enthusiastic response from Afridied many years ago. Grief is to be of “good cheer” but somecan American leaders. A decision like an infection; you must adtimes life gets in the way. And was made to form an advisory dress it before you can heal. when you get older, there are a committee to provide diverse To make this season a little lot of specific things that make insight and support for this brighter, after addressing your this season difficult. initiative,” said Brian Harding, grief, turn your sights to blessSeniors often are more isoexecutive director of The History Happy Holidays! ings. The memories created with lated. They do not have a car, Museum. your loved one is a blessing. The and sometimes it was not their Chaired by Tina Patton and 14500 State Rd. 23, Ste. 6 Granger, IN breath in your lungs is a blesschoice to give it up. If their famcomposed of over 15 African 574-327-2357 ing. Your neighbor who stops by ily lives in different states, they American and other community serenityhme.com to say “Merry Christmas” is a may not be able to travel to be leaders, the advisory committee has overseen the 1950s African American Worker’s Transforma® tion Project since its inception in the fall of 2022. The project ™ has been possible, in part, with support from AEP Foundation through Indiana Michigan Power, Planning on transitioning to: Community Foundation of St. A senior community?

MICHIGAN INDIANA Joseph County, Schurz FoundaA more manageable home? tion, University of Notre Dame, The Doshi Family Fund, Marvin Need to settle an estate?

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The objective of the new 603 E. Main St. 3010 Hickory Rd. Realtor®, SRES®, CSHP® iteration of the Worker’s Home is Niles, MI 49120 Mishawaka, IN 46545 to provide an innovative and immersive place for visitors to learn about life for a 1950s African Each Office Independently Owned and Operated helen@helenquick.com | www.helenquick.com American family. To tell this history as completely and accurately as possible, The History Museum staff has completed extensive research, turning to the African American community for stories and information about local firms, companies, establishments, and organizations. Individuals and families have provided assistance in finding photographs, documents, furnishings, records, and other materials associated with local African American businesses, homes, and family life in the 1950s.

In scheduling the opening • Individualized assessment for the 1950s African American Worker’s Home, The History • Personalized in-home care plan Museum saw a unique opportu- • Flexible • Flexible Hours••Weekly Weekly Pay Pay Hours • Seniors can continue to safely age in place nity to coincide the timing with • Sign on Bonus • 401k • Non-medical in-home care can be a cost the premiere of a play produced • Sign on Bonus • 401k by the South Bend Civic Theeffective alternative. https:/ /abcmichiana.clearcareonline.com/apply/ atre. “Better Homes: The Play” https:/ /abcmichiana.clearcareonline.com/apply/ https://abcmichiana.clearcareonline.com/apply/ License #20-013467-1 is based on Gabrielle Robinson’s book “Better Homes of South Bend.”

Individuals can experience the 1950s African American Worker’s Home through guided tours offered daily. The cost of the tour will be included with a museum admission. The History Museum

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22 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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December Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library programs for adults Below is the MPHPL November calendar of events for adults. Registration is required for most programs.

Registration can be secured by calling (574) 259-5277 or visit mphpl.org. Check mphpl. org for the most up-to-date information regarding events.

Winterfest Mishawaka Parks 5-8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2.

The Mishawaka Parks and Recreation Department hosts the annual Winterfest event.

Come by yourself or bring the family. MPHPL will have a table at the event and will be passing out free holiday crafts along with program guides.

Bittersweet Branch Events Scrapbook Holiday Cards, 10:30-11:30 a.m. Monday, Dec. 11. Create a DIY holiday, birthday, get well or congratulations card by using scrapbook paper.

Winter Wonderfest, 4:30-7 p.m.

Monday, Dec. 18. Families are invited to take a holiday photo while enjoying hot cocoa at a special meet-and-greet with a real reindeer. Registration is required for a 45-minute session at 4:30-5:15 p.m., 5:15-6 p.m. or 6-6:45 p.m. Preference is given to library card holders. All others will be placed on a waiting list.

Bingo, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 20. Join MPHPL for

an hour of bingo and beverages.

Winners will receive small prizes and raffle tickets for a chance to win a door prize.

Harris Branch Events Decorative Dessert Houses, 10:30-11:30 a.m. Tuesday, Dec. 12. Celebrate the season and create an edible masterpiece with graham crackers, frosting and various candies; limited to MPHPL cardholders.

Chapter Chats Book Club, 10:30-11:30 a.m. Thursday, Dec. 14. “Salt to the Sea” by Ruta Sepetys can be picked up in advance at the front desk.

Mishawaka Library Events Saturday Morning Book

Club, 10:15-11:15 a.m. Saturday, Dec. 2. Discuss December’s book selection, “The Thursday Murder Club” by Richard Osman. Books can be picked up in advance at the front desk of the Mishawaka Library.

Cooking Classics: Cookies and Mocktails, 4:30-5:30 p.m.

Monday, Dec. 4. Experiment with different flavors and irresistibly delicious goodies; limited to library cardholders.

Festive Films Trivia Night, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 8.

Enjoy an evening of holiday movie-themed trivia. Questions will cover classics,

modern and animated film favorites. Groups must have between two to six members. A small prize will be awarded to the winning team; limited to 15 teams.

Decorative Dessert Houses 5:30-6:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 12. Celebrate the season and create an edible masterpiece with graham crackers, frosting and various candies; limited to MPHPL cardholders.

Dine with a Book, 6-7 p.m.

Tuesday, Dec. 19. Enjoy a night out with pizza and a book. “The Ocean at the End of the Lane”

by Neil Gaiman can be picked up in advance at the front desk.

The St. Joseph County Public Library will have several programs in December.

Looking for a group to crochet or knit with? All are welcome to join this group of needlework enthusiasts. It will be from 5-7 p.m. Monday, Dec. 4, at the Centre Township Branch, 1150 E. Kern Road, South Bend.

SJCPL Online Book Club will meet from 8-8:45 p.m.

Monday, Dec. 4. This month’s book is “One Night Two Souls Went Walking” by Ellen

Cooney. Register online to attend, sjcpl.org.

Meet up with other quilting enthusiasts to sew quilts and create other items for local charities. “Quilts with Love” will be from 1-5 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 5, at German Township Branch, 52807 Lynewood Ave., South Bend.

“Neurobiological Support for Navigating the Holidays,” presented by Self-Healing Communities of Greater Michiana, will be from 6-7:30 p.m.

Tuesday, Dec. 5, at the main library’s learning center, 305 S. Michigan St., South Bend. This interactive workshop aims to explore new ideas to help yourself, loved ones, and neighbors navigate the holidays and feel

more supported when the days feel heavy. Register online.

“Sounds of the Holidays” will be from 4:30-5:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 5, at the Francis branch, 52665 N. Ironwood Road, South Bend. Enjoy the sounds of the holidays featuring music from local harpist, Anna Hagen.

Yoga for Everybody will be from 5:30-6:30 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 6, at the main library’s learning center, 305 S. Michigan St., South Bend; registration recommended. Connect with your mind and your body during these free, donationbased community classes taught by certified instructors with the aim of making yoga accessible to all; bring your own mat.

SJCPL hosts several December programs

December 2023 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ 23

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At home or on the go — Social Security is online

By MONA HARTER District Manager, South Bend Social Security Office When you retire, if you become disabled, or if someone you depend on dies — we are there when you need us. With your personal and secure my Social Security account, you can access your information, benefits, and important services from just about anywhere.

Having a personal my Social Security account allows you to:

• Compare future benefit estimates for different dates or ages when you may want to begin receiving benefits.

• Check the status of your benefits application or appeal.

• Review your earnings history.

• Request a replacement Social Security card (in most states).

If you already receive benefits, you can also: • Get a benefit verification or proof of income letter.

• Set up or change your direct deposit.

• Change your address.

• Get a Social Security 1099 form (SSA-1099).

You can even use your personal my Social Security account to opt out of receiving certain notices by mail, including the annual cost-ofliving adjustments notice and the income-related monthly adjustment amount notice.

These notices are available in your Message Center when you

sign into your account. We will email you when you have a new message, so you never miss an important update.

It’s easy to sign up for a my Social Security account. Please let your friends and family know that they can create their own my Social Security account today at ssa.gov/myaccount.

Social Security information is available at home or on the go.

Come ‘Home for the Holidays’ with Music Director Alastair Willis Dec. 16-17 South Bend’s favorite holiday concert, “Home for the Holidays,” celebrates the magic of the season with Music Director Alastair Willis and the South Bend Symphony Orchestra. The concert will be at 7:30 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 16 and at 2:30 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 17, at the Morris Performing Arts Center. Everyone’s favorite carols and holiday songs will fill the hall when the 100-member Michiana Festival Chorus and a special Southold Dance Theater appearance bring you the greatest holiday show yet.

“There’s no better way to celebrate the season than with ‘Home for the Holidays’ and the South Bend Symphony,” said Music Director Alastair Willis.

“We are delighted to feature choral music this year; taking center stage alongside the orchestra this year will be the Michiana Festival Chorus. We welcome back Southold Dance Theater, we’ll enjoy fun, festive traditional classics as well as some surprises and, of course, our sensational orchestra. This is

the perfect concert for the whole family; bring everyone and bring your voices too.”

Back by popular demand is Brunch with Santa Sunday, Dec. 17. The buffet-style brunch includes kid-friendly entertainment with a special appearance

by Santa. Tickets are $15 for children (12 years old and younger) and $25 for adults.

The South Bend Symphony Orchestra thanks Everwise Credit Union for its support of “Home for The Holidays.” Additionally, the symphony acknowledges Jordan Lexus of Mishawaka as a distinguished artistic sponsor of the 2023-24 season, reflecting their commitment to fostering artistic excellence and enriching the community through exceptional musical experiences.

Tickets start at $19 to $75.

Purchase tickets at www.morriscenter.org or call Morris Performing Arts Center Box Office at (574) 235-9190 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, and Friday 10 a.m. to 5:30 p.m.

You can also visit the Morris Box Office, 211 N. Michigan St., South Bend, during the times listed above or two hours before any performance, or stop by the symphony office, 127 N. Michigan St., South Bend, between 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Tuesday through Friday.

To view the 2023-24 season schedule, visit southbendsymphony.org.

Dates, programs, and venues are subject to change.

Valet parking is available.

Skip the line in the parking garage when you pre-pay for the

new valet parking service. For $25, pull your car up to the Morris Performing Arts Center and valets will take care of the rest.

Valets will be available on the north side of the Morris.

Customers may pull in from Martin Luther King Blvd. onto Michigan Street, where the team will be set up to take in cars; signs will also be available for guidance.

Once you are finished with the show, vehicle pick-up will be on the north side of the building.

You will then exit your vehicle onto Main Street.

To pre-pay, use this link https://tinyurl.com/SymphonyAtTheMorris.

Bring a non-perishable food item and get a ticket. Help stock the shelves of St. Vincent de Paul Society food pantry this holiday season by bringing non-perishable food items. Patrons who bring at least one new, unopened, packaged, non-perishable food item to the concert will receive a free ticket to the next Jack M. Champaigne Masterworks Series concert, “Discover Mahler’s Symphony No. 5” which is Feb. 10, 2024.

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‘Tis the season for scams: Five ways to protect you and your family (Statepoint) In today’s hyper-connected digital universe, cyber criminals have more information than ever before, with the ability to reach you through unsecured public WiFi, your email inbox, via text message and more.

According to a Scam and Robocall Report from TMobile, Americans lost an estimated $39.5 billion to phone scams in 2022. Lucky for you, there are several ways to protect and safeguard your personal information to help prevent scammers from scammin’ this holiday season.

1. Avoid Public USB Ports: Traveling by plane this holiday season? The FCC warns that cyber criminals can download malware to public USB charging ports to gain access to your information.

Prevent this by using an AC power outlet instead.

2. Beware of Charity Scams: It’s the season of giving, but the FCC warns many cyber criminals take advantage by creating fake charities staged as real nonprofit organizations to gain access to your payment information.

Woof. To prevent this, don’t click on suspicious email or text links and verify the organization is registered at the National Association of State Charity Officials or Better Business Bureau’s Wise Giving Alliance before donating this holiday season.

3. Screen Your Calls: Scammers are continuously upping their game, with total robocall attempts up 75% from 2021 to 2022. Detecting whether an incoming call is a potential scam isn’t always easy, but T-Mobile’s Scam Shield app makes it simple.

Free to all T-Mobile customers, Scam Shield enhances your scam-blocking protections so you can say goodbye to scam calls. In 2022 alone, Scam Shield identified or blocked 41.5 billion scam calls in the T-Mobile network.

That’s a whopping 1,317 calls identified or blocked every second. With Scam Shield, when the network detects a potential scam call, it is flagged and displayed as “Scam Likely” on your device.

Customers who want even more protection can download

The History Museum giving presentation about Yuletide traditions Curator of Copshaholm, Skylar Whited, will describe Christmas traditions of yesteryear at “Insights in History,” taking place at 1:30 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 6, at The History Museum. Admission is $3, general and $1, members.

Reservations are required by Monday, Dec. 4. “Insights in History” is sponsored by THK Law, LLP. A first-floor tour of the Oliver Mansion decorated for the holi-

day season will be offered.

J.D. and Anna Oliver and their four children moved into their new home at 808 W. Washington in South Bend on New Year’s Day in 1897.

“Insights in History” is a monthly series that features a lecture in conjunction with an exhibit at The History Museum.

For information, call The History Museum at (574) 235-9664 or visit historymuseumSB.org.

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4. Shop Smarter Online: According to Statista, 57% of holiday shoppers plan to use their smartphone to make holiday purchases this year, and scammers are onto them, ramping up activity during the two weeks before Christmas. To minimize any cyber Grinches trying to steal your personal info, monitor your financial accounts regularly for suspicious charges and sign up for your bank or credit card company’s text or email notifications to stay on top of fraudulent activity.

5. Use Secure Tools: Safeguard your online accounts with Multi-Factor Authentication, which requires users to enter two different kinds of information to log in, like a password and one-time PIN code. It’s like having a digital bouncer to make sure only you get into your accounts. Another protection is a password manager, giving you the ability to securely store passwords across multiple platforms and websites. The tool also provides an

autofill password function and a new password generator.

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SJCP hosting December events A Winter Wonderland Ornament Hunt will be Friday, Dec. 1. Elves have hidden ornaments around the St. Joseph County Parks and they want you to embark on a quest to find them. Every Friday in December, the elves will unveil clues on the St. Joseph County Parks’ Facebook page to help

lead you to the secret ornament hideaways. Join the game, locate the ornaments, snap a photo, and submit them for a chance to win park prizes.

The ornament hunt will occur each Friday during public park hours at the following St. Joseph County Parks: St. Patrick’s County Park, Ben-

dix Woods County Park, and Ferrettie-Baugo Creek County Park. This is a free event.

Disc golf poker will be from noon to 5:30 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2, at Ferrettie / Baugo Creek County Park, 57057 Ash Road, Osceola.

Stop by the gatehouse to pay and pick up your hand. As you

Educators invited to ‘Gallery Talks for Teachers’ Teachers are invited to “Gallery Talks for Teachers,” presented by The History Museum and the Studebaker National Museum. The event provides information about the museum campus’ educational offerings for students.

From 4:30 to 5:30 p.m.

Thursday, Dec. 7, educators can

tour The History Museum’s Oliver Mansion. Each visit will provide a certificate of completion for two PGP points, and teachers will receive corresponding curriculum materials.

The event is free and complimentary wine will be offered.

To register, contact Stephanie McCune-Bell, director of educa-

tion, at smccunebell@historymuseumSB.org or call (574) 235-9664, ext. 241.

The History Museum and the Studebaker National Museum welcome school visits all year long.

For information, call (574) 235-9664 or visit historymuseumSB.org.

Battell Center offers activities for seniors The Battell Center in Mishawaka offers activities for seniors.

Aerobics is from 9-10 a.m. every Monday and Wednesday.

Euchre is at 6-9 p.m. every Monday and 1 p.m. every Thursday.

Pinochle is from 1-4:30 p.m. every Tuesday. All are welcome to attend.

Need a little exercise? Come to the Battell Center’s gym for an afternoon of ping pong from 1-4 p.m. Tuesday and Friday.

The nutrition site at Battell

Center serves lunches in the community room at 11:30 a.m. daily, Monday through Friday.

The suggested donation is $4.25 for seniors and it isn’t so much a cost as a suggested donation. All contributions are accepted. Lunch is offered at $8.25 for those under 60.

Reservations must be made a day in advance by calling (574) 256-2325.

Senior Shape Up is from 10:15-11:15 a.m. every Monday and Wednesday. All exercises are done while sitting in a chair or

standing near the chair.

Line dancing is from 9:3010:30 a.m. every Tuesday. The group is open to all skill levels and always looking for new dancers to join.

Pastels is from noon to 3 p.m. every Tuesday. Join this group if you enjoy working independently on your artwork. Bring your own supplies, and be ready to have fun and socialize.

For other events, call (574) 258-1664 or visit mishawaka. in.gov/things-to-do/parks-andrecreation.

play the course, switch out a card at select holes to make the best hand you can. The person with the top hand will win a 2024 disc golf combo pass.

The cost is $1 per poker hand and regular disc golf fees.

Cocoa, Candy Canes, and Crafts will be from 10 a.m. to noon Saturday, Dec. 9, at Nature Center West Wing, 56960 Timothy Road, New Carlisle.

It’s not too early in the season to start making your own ornaments. Put a unique, nature-themed spin on this year’s handmade projects by using materials collected right from nature. Tunes, treats, and a warm drink will be provided.

The cost is $5 per person.

Registration and payment is required by Dec. 6. Call (574) 654-3155 to register or email bendixwoods@sjcparks.org.

A lantern lit solstice hike will be from 6-8 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 21, at The Brown Barn, 50651 Laurel Road, South Bend. Enjoy the brisk air while following a glowing trail. Afterward, enjoy a fun treat, hot cocoa, and make a solstice ornament.

Lanterns will be available for each family to help guide the way. Registration and payment is required by Dec. 19. The cost is $3 per person. Call (574) 654-3155 to register or email bendixwoods@sjcparks.org.

For more information, visit sjcparks.org.

26 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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Travel

Elegant Oliver Mansion typical of wealthy industrialists in late 1800s To get an up-close and personal look at how rich people lived in the late 1800s and early 1900s, drive to South Bend and tour the GREAT Oliver ManESCAPES sion. While Text and Photos you’re in

By ROD KING the neighborhood, have lunch at Tippecanoe House, the former home of the Studebakers. In fact, why not just spend the day and tour the Studebaker Museum, too?

J.D. Oliver made his money manufacturing plows, the kind pulled by horses. His were more durable than the iron ones made by competitors

thanks to a chilling process developed by his father, James.

The company became the largest plow manufacturer in the world. The early versions cost $6. When Oliver died in 1932, he was the richest man in Indiana.

Built in 17 months between 1895 and 1896, the Romanesque Queen Anne-style mansion is constructed of native Indiana granite field stones. It sits on 2.5 acres that include formal sunken gardens, a tea house, pergola, tennis lawn and fountain at 808 W. Washington St. They named the 38-room home Copshaholm.

Unlike many historic mansions around the country that display furnishings from a specific period, Copshaholm is full of furniture and accents owned by the family. That’s because members of the Oliver

family resided in the house for 72 years. The house was never abandoned, suffered weather damage or vandalism. It was later given to the South Bend Historical Museum and is

listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

Oliver didn’t scrimp on the structure or its furnishings.

The ceiling in the dining room, for instance, features five

SET FOR A FEAST—The large, expandable dining table is set as it would have been for special dinners. All of the furnishings are original to the house. Much of the furniture was chosen by J.D. and his wife on a European trip in 1899.

mahogany beams, the walls are covered with woven tapestries and the upper sashes of the bay windows are leaded glass. The 14 fireplaces were mainly Continued on page 27

MAIN ENTRANCE HALL — An elegant mahogany entry leads to the staircase to the secondfloor bedrooms. Unlike many mansions around the country, the Oliver mansion was occupied by members of the family a total of 72 years. It was never abandoned or subject to vandalism. It’s now owned by the South Bend Historical Museum and is listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

MAHOGANY FIREPLACE—Oliver mansion has 14 fireplaces. They were mainly for atmosphere because the house has central heating.

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SUNKEN GARDENS —The Oliver property at 808 W. Washington Ave., South Bend, covers 2.5 acres and includes sunken gardens, a pergola, a tea house, tennis lawn and a fountain.

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Travel

PLOW COST FARMERS $6 — J.D. Oliver made his fortune manufacturing plows. His plows were more durable than his competitors, thanks to a chilling process developed by his father, James. When J.D. died in 1932 he was the richest man in Indiana.

Elegant Oliver Continued from page 26 for atmosphere because the building had central heat. Book cases, which are full of J.D.’s original books, match the curve of the exterior wall and the oak floors feature a parquet border. Much of the furniture in the house was chosen by the Olivers on a trip to Europe in 1899.

The polished wood floor, high ceiling and plaster relief give Oliver’s personal study on the first floor a decidedly English feel. His original “partners” desk dominates the room and the sterling silver plaque by Tiffany and Company on the back of the chair is engraved with his name.

Perhaps the most interesting feature of the large kitchen is the 10-door refrigerator, which was originally the home’s icebox. During the 1930s, the kitchen was remodeled.

Stainless-steel counter tops were installed along with Art Deco light fixtures. Mrs. Oliver met regularly here with the butler to discuss dinner menus and upcoming parties. They employed a staff of 15.

Guests arriving for gatherings at Copshaholm entered the house from the covered portico and porch into a small reception area. Instead of walking directly into the main room, they took a short set of steps at the side of the room and entered half-way up the elegant staircase so they could be properly announced to party guests, while making a grand entrance down the stairs.

The mansion is open from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Saturday and noon to 5 p.m. Sunday. Tickets for an hour-and-a-half tour can be purchased in the Historical Museum behind the house.

Adult tickets are $11, seniors are $9.50 and youth are $7.

38-ROOM OLIVER MANSION — The Romanesque, Queen Ann-style Oliver mansion in South Bend was constructed of native Indiana granite field stones. It took 17 months to build between 1895 and 1896.

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28 ■ SENIOR LIFE ■ December 2023

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For me, caregiving is the hardest job I have ever done. It is also the greatest gift of love I could ever give. Many of us are in caregiving roles daily. We care for children, grandchildren, parents, friends and even our pets. I was a teacher for 40 years. I cared for students. As a mom of two and a grandma of five, I was a caregiver. All of these caregiving roles never prepared me for my mom’s diagnosis of dementia in 2007. At that time, there were not many facilities, support groups, or even friends who were dealing with dementia. I learned by trial and error.

Alzheimer’s and Dementia Services.

Alzheimer’s and Dementia Services was a game changer. On October 1, 2011, my mom went from the hospital to a care facility. I had to take a week off from work to make sure this transition happened.

The first week of December 2011, I took my healthy dad to the doctor. After the doctor ran a few tests, we took him from the doctor’s office to the hospital. He never came home. He needed a quadruple bypass and valve replacement. I cared for him for six weeks while he was in the hospital, all this time ensuring my mom was receiving the care she needed.

through. As a child caregiving for my mom, I managed and directed. I didn’t live it 24/7.

I learned quickly what my dad’s heart went through when he was caring for my mom. That he probably didn’t sleep much. However, my mom was sweet and gentle - my husband was not. He became verbally abusive. It wasn’t him. He forgot he said those words. This was not an easy way to live.

Day after day, I was at the Alzheimer’s and Dementia Services office in tears. It was easy for me to tell friends to go to support groups but I My Dad was in denial. It took him a year to come was not making the time to go. I was, as many, to terms with my mom’s diagnosis. As the not prepared for this new caretaking role. All the disease progressed, so did my caregiving role. I advice I have given to others through the years, I We buried my dad without my mom there. She sought the advice of an elder care attorney. never even knew or understood he was no longer was not taking. Having meaningful conversations I finally got my mom to a doctor to confirm the that required any depth of comprehension no alive. I am convinced that moms disease had a diagnosis of Vascular Dementia. I hired a home longer existed with my husband. Life at home major health impact on my dad. That day was a care agency to give my dad a break through the day of mourning for so many reasons. Mom lived was dependent on me; running the household week. My parents were married at this point for alone, making financial decisions alone, making for three years after dads passing.

60 years. My dad did a few things around the all decisions, alone. house, however, mom kept the house running. As My caregiving role continued. I made sure she a caregiver, I made sure their house was clean. was cared for properly. When she was not, I was Every doctor made the same claim. “This is a Laundry had to be done. Groceries had to be very complex case”. In September of 2023, a her voice. The second most difficult decision I purchased. I soon had to lay out clothing for my made was deciding to quit feeding my mom. She doctor diagnosed my husband with mixed dad to get her ready in the morning. I became the could no longer swallow – and I did not want her dementia. Vascular dementia from the surgery hostess of all family meals and holiday and Alzheimer’s from anesthesia and delirium in to choke. A few years after moms passing, I preparation. I was working full time as a teacher, became a caregiver for a few other seniors who the hospital. I am angry. I am angry for myself and at this time, I became a part-time caregiver. and for him. had no family and needed some assistance. At that point, I felt like I was or could be a I learned caregiving for a dementia patient is professional caregiver.

Caregiving is hard mentally and physically. I different from other diseases. I took my mom to promised my children I would not let my the dentist. Leaving the dentist’s office, she forgot My role of caregiver continued. In 2019, my 61husband’s disease take a toll on me as it did for how to get in the car. I could not get her to my dad. Many days I wonder how I do that. A year-old husband was diagnosed with a nonunderstand how to put her feet in the car. We friend once asked me why I thought dementia malignant rare craniopharyngioma brain tumor. both ended up on the concrete with me in tears. was worse than other diseases, like cancer. It is This type of tumor is near the optic nerve and Things became difficult for my 83 year old dad. It pituitary gland. In April 2022, the tumor was not worse, but different. Your loved one cannot was time to hire someone to come in each express how they feel. They cannot express their growing and his vision was worsening. Surgery morning to get mom ready for the day. wishes. They may forget who you are. They are was scheduled September 26, 2022. Two days 100 percent dependent on one person. later, I knew life would never, ever be the same.

Mom fell at home, the caregiver called 911 and My husband’s short-term memory was gone, and Their person. The one person who somewhere in mom ended up in the hospital. I raced to the their being knows they love you and you love after six weeks in the hospital, he was released hospital to make sure she received care. The them. and sent home. hospital would not let me in. I had to explain she barely talked. I had to fight to get to her. The Paula A. I was again a caregiver. This time, it was as a social worker at the hospital introduced me to Daughter. Wife. Mother. Caregiver. full-time caretaker. I know what my Dad went

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