My charming heroes

‘L adies and gentlemen, please welcome the charmer himself…’ ‘The charmer’ – these words have preceded my entrance to absolutely everything for the last 35 years, thanks to my appearance in the TV show of that name, which started in 1987.

Every actor complains of being typecast – sexy, baddie, mother-in-law, you name it. Actors constantly have a beef about some description or other. So I suppose being known for being charming isn’t really such a bad rap.

But what exactly is charm? Is it hereditary? Can you manufacture it? Can it be turned on and off like a hot tap?

Smarmy, slippery, oily – these adjectives can all be applied when the charm tap isn’t running fully up to temperature and the object is either trying too hard, or just hasn’t got ‘it’.

We all know the odd charmer. Charmers don’t appear to be trying. They smile easily, seem comfortable in their skin and don’t dominate the conversation. They are in no way overbearing and, most importantly, they listen.

In my case, I had charming parents. I still do have a mother who charms all before her: the waiters in every restaurant; the care workers in her residential home; almost every man she has ever met – and every woman, too. She remembers every birthday, and sends postcards just because she’s thinking of you.

So does a child merely watch and learn – or absorb the ability to charm without even realising?

Look at some examples in public life and see who’s got it and who just misses. Jeremy Corbyn? Not a trace! But, unexpectedly, Ed Balls has shown immense charm since leaving politics, as has Michael Portillo on his travel programmes – hence the viewing figures.

My own profession is renowned for producing grumpy, difficult and spoilt characters. But the three greats of all time, John Gielgud, Ralph Richardson and Laurence Olivier, all had oceans of charm in their own, sometimes rather waspish, ways.

For me, the two outstanding charmers were David Niven and Roger Moore. To watch Niven on back episodes of Parkinson is to watch an absolute masterclass. Effortless, self-deprecating and relaxed, he captivates from the first minute. To try to analyse or explain is pointless and impossible.

As for Moore, no one delivered the immortal line ‘The name’s Bond, James Bond’ with such delicate charm, tinged with authority. We used to sit having dinner at the Colombe D’Or in the south of France egging him on. ‘Go on, Rog. Go on. Say it, please.’

We knew he didn’t want to but, because he was so charming, of course he did as he was told. I never heard him say a nasty word about anybody. And every fan who came up to him – whatever the time of day, however inconvenient – got his attention and time. Everyone went away charmed to the hilt.

Now, you will notice I haven’t mentioned any women yet. I think with women charm can often be confused with flirting. For a woman to be described as charming, she has to pass the female litmus test – is she flirting, or does she treat men and women with equal attention and charm them both in equal measure?

We get into choppy water here. Charm is obviously attractive and, in these woke times, flirting is probably frowned on. So I shall refrain from delving too deeply into this area. Safer ground can be found in politics – not noted for its female charmers, but Betty Boothroyd and Shirley Williams both graced the House of Commons with considerable amounts of the stuff. Betty is still charming her way effortlessly into her nineties.

Charm can be a negative, as with two of my television characters, Ralph Gorse in The Charmer and Lewis Archer in Coronation Street. They exuded considerable malevolent charm, making them irresistible to women, which enabled them to fleece their unfortunate victims of their fortunes. They are probably the two most popular characters with the general public I have played – make of that what you will.

So here are my ingredients to make a charm omelette. Make whoever you are talking to feel important, and give compliments freely. Whatever you do, remember names. It takes practice, but it is a knack that can definitely be acquired, and always goes down well. Look people in the eye and try to look engaged – even when the story is less than gripping – and try to smile as much as possible.

Try not to be critical – especially of people’s children. Surely you all know that by now! And don’t worry about using your hands to hug or console people – as long as they don’t wander.

Coco Chanel supposedly said, ‘The best things in life are free. The second-best things are very, very expensive.’ Just remember charm is free. You can’t buy it or invent it. But, together with good manners, it is life-enhancing and pleasing to all. You just have to be charming, whether you know you are or not.

Oh, hello! Nigel Havers and Fiona Fullerton in The Charmer