Easing a Difficult Transition

by KARI APTED Easing a Difficult Transition

Mary Roach never envisioned herself being a hospice volunteer, but the death of her father in 2017 set in motion a series of events that forever altered the life of the longtime teacher, coach and administrator.

Mary Roach was unfamiliar with hospice care until her family needed it, but when she discovered what it involved, she considered it a Godsend.

“My dad, Jim Roach—we call him ‘Pop’—passed away in 2017. He was 90 years old, a classic World War II Navy veteran, my rock. He and I were peanut butter and jelly,” Roach said. “He had congestive heart failure and COPD but was strong enough to handle living by himself.”

Pop’s caregiver called Roach one day to report that her father was not doing well and was refusing to seek treatment. Roach convinced her dad he needed medical care and hurried into Atlanta to be with him at Emory St. Joseph’s Hospital. Roach and her three siblings, Cecilia, Dan and Mike, took turns staying with Pop. While his physical therapist was there one Monday, his hospital gown fell open. They were alarmed to see the right side of his chest red and swollen, and he was soon being rushed to the Cardiac Care Unit. It only took a few days in the CCU for doctors to realize nothing could be done to improve Pop’s condition. His care team recommended sending him home with hospice care. “I really didn’t know much about hospice,” Roach said. “Pam DeMatteo [a community liaison] from Longleaf [Hospice in Covington] was there, and she told me it was free. I said, ‘What do you mean it’s free? Nothing is free in this world.’ She explained everything, and we signed the paperwork that day.”

As Roach worried about needing help over the weekend, DeMatteo reassured her that Longleaf was available 24 hours a day.

“I’d never heard of an organization like that,” Roach said. “They gave me a phone number, and I couldn’t believe I could just call at 3 a.m. if I needed somebody to talk to. Our hospice nurse was named Stacy, and she was incredible. I asked her so many questions. She was so kind and loving. Anything we needed or wanted, she was there.”

Pop remained active at home through the weekend. “That Sunday,” Roach said, “he cooked his own food, wrote checks and paid bills. That was Pop, getting everything in order.” By Sunday evening, Pop was in bed. “I kept asking Stacy how long he had left,” Roach said. “It was [impressive] how she knew the timeline.” On Wednesday, Stacy suggested contacting the family to say their goodbyes. “My niece, the oldest grandchild, arrived 25 minutes before he passed away. It was uncanny how Stacy knew exactly how long he had. It was almost down to the minute,” Roach said. “Something I will never forget about his care from Longleaf and St. Joseph’s was how everyone treated him with dignity and respect. No one ever treated him like just another old person.”

Following Pop’s death, Roach stayed in touch with Catherine Vaughn, his social worker at Longleaf. After a few months, Vaughn asked Roach if she ever considered volunteering at Longleaf.

Roach laughed as she replied: “I love hospice, but no, I don’t think that’s for me.” Vaughn persisted, knowing that Roach’s 26 years as a teacher, coach and assistant principal with the Newton County School System made her a strong candidate to work with kids at Camp Kate—a free monthly bereavement program Longleaf hosts to help children work through grief following a loved one’s death. Roach agreed to try. Although she enjoyed the day-long experience, she asked Loy Turner, Longleaf’s community outreach and volunteer coordinator, about opportunities that involved interaction with the patients.

“I’ve always had this thing for elderly people,” Roach said. “I just love hanging out with them and hearing their stories.” When she found out about Longleaf’s home visitation program, she signed up. “They treated me like an employee, not a volunteer. I was impressed with that,” Roach said. “I went through training, a background check, got a name badge—all of that.”

Roach admits she felt nervous as she drove to her first visit. She had been paired with a senior citizen named Fred. “I don’t pray a lot, but I do ask for help,” Roach said. “When I walked into that house, I asked my Pop to help me out. Then I saw Fred, and my jaw dropped. I thought, ‘Are you kidding me?’ He was my dad reincarnated.” Fred was wearing the same kind of plaid shirt and khaki pants, the same type of tennis shoes and the same black leather belt Pop always wore. He even had the matching walker beside him.

“I reached out my hand and said, ‘Hi, my name is Mary.’ He looked me up and down and asked where my name tag was. I had forgotten my badge. I ran out to the car and got it, then asked if we could start over again,” Roach said. “What was supposed to be a 15-minute visit lasted over an hour. I started out sitting across the room but kept moving my chair closer. It was uncanny how much he was like Pop.”

Fred was almost 90 years old. Like Pop, he had served in the Navy during World War II. He had also been a clown for the Shriners, lived in a nudist colony for a while and served as a

“I believe one of the greatest gifts we can give is to be fully present with another person, fully engaged, not worried about anything else. If I can do that for one person, that is a wonderful thing.”

hospice volunteer, proudly showing Roach his certificate from 1972. He shared Pop’s sarcastic sense of humor.

“What really got me is what happened when I left,” Roach said. “I went to shake his hand, and he moved my arm back and forth like a saw. He said, ‘Know what we say in the mountains? We say, it’s good to saw ya,’ which is exactly what my dad used to do when I left.”

Roach could not stop crying once she returned to her car. “I was bawling like a baby,” she said. “I called Loy and told her that Fred was my dad reincarnated, that she had hit a grand slam matching us up. I knew I was in 100 percent and coming every time.” Roach and Fred enjoyed 52 days together, talking, playing checkers or just watching Animal Planet during their twice-weekly visits. “We had such a good time,” she said. “His daughters told me that he asked every day if I was coming, and he got so excited on the days I visited. I got so close to him. I couldn’t help it.” Roach felt honored when Fred’s family asked her to speak at his funeral. “I didn’t really plan to be a hospice volunteer,” she said, “but things just aligned.”

Roach has continued to volunteer with Longleaf after Fred’s death.

“Everybody wants to be heard, and I just listen,” Roach said. “I believe one of the greatest gifts we can give is to be fully present with another person, fully engaged, not worried about anything else. If I can do that for one person, that is a wonderful thing.”

For more information on Longleaf Hospice in Covington, visit LongleafHospice.com or call 770-939-9179. Founded in 2009, locally owned Longleaf Hospice has offices in Atlanta and Covington and offers end-oflife care to those with life-limiting illnesses.

GRACE & TRUTH

A Uniting Force

The mercy and love we were shown when Jesus went to the cross and shed his blood for our sins supersede all boundaries. They can bring together people from all walks, change lives, alter futures and build communities in which everyone thrives.

by JUSTIN ADAMS

Stop what you’re doing and take a few minutes to answer these questions. What if someone was nice to you, encouraged you or believed in you? Would that have changed your day, your career, your life?

Oftentimes, one moment of kindness, one encouraging word or one person believing in you can alter your future. We have an incredible power to motivate and inspire, a prodigious potential to build a community in which everyone thrives. How do we do it? How do we alter the courses of those around us? The answer is simple: grace. It changes lives. Showing forgiveness is grace. Providing motivation is grace. Believing in someone is grace.

Grace is more than just a religious term used by Christians. Grace is decent humanity caring for its neighbors. Decent humanity has been hidden for too long. Division, anger and isolation have overshadowed decent humanity and grace. I believe it’s time for grace to make a comeback. I believe it’s time for grace to be at the forefront of this community’s need to come together. Stop focusing on things we do not agree on, things like political differences and cultural separations. Instead, allow grace to unite us.

We all agree on kindness, goodness and politeness. These are all subcategories of grace. When you show kindness, goodness or politeness, you are giving grace.

I’m a product and a direct result of grace. Someone was graceful towards me, which allowed me to become who I am today. A local church and local pastor simply invited me to worship services and changed my life. The moment I realized Jesus Christ loved me so much that He died on the cross for my sins was the moment I experienced grace in its ultimate form. Who I am today is a direct result of the life-changing encounter I had with grace through Jesus Christ. Since then, one of my greatest goals has been to show others the same grace that was shown to me.

I challenge you to show grace. Our community needs more of it. Our neighbors need to see it. Our children need to experience it. Lives can be changed by it. Help someone become a product of grace.

Justin Adams is the pastor of New Life Praise Center in Covington. Visit NewLifePraiseCenter.net or call 770-815-3601 to learn more.

“Stop focusing on things we do not agree on, things like political differences and cultural separations. Instead, allow grace to unite us.”

New Life Praise Center Pastor Justin Adams

“Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.”

Hippocrates

A PLACE ‘WHERE FRIENDS MEET’

by KARI APTED

City Pharmacy brings the delight of fine dining to downtown Covington through the distinctive vision of owner Tedo Stone, general manager Candice Dean and executive chef Andrew Featherstone.

You may initially find City Pharmacy’s name perplexing, but the restaurant’s fare proves solidly coherent. Longtime residents of Newton County remember that the building originally housed a drug store and lunch counter under the same name. It became known as the place “where friends meet”—a tagline owner Tedo Stone still uses today.

The City Pharmacy building at the corner of Church and Floyd streets in downtown Covington has been owned by the Stone family for decades and has housed several different businesses. Expertly renovated, it now brings the delight of fine dining to The Square. Whitewashed brick, tin ceiling tiles, exposed ductwork and the original black-and-white tile floor contribute to the welcoming, urban-farmhouse vibe.

Executive chef Andrew Featherstone prepares everything fresh in-house, applying over 35 years of kitchen expertise to his craft. His cuisine honors southern culinary traditions while reimagining the classics.

Patrons can settle in at a table or belly up to the bar, where bar manager Chelsea Garrett or a friendly bartender will fill your glass with a seasonal signature cocktail; or try one of the classics from the drink menu, perhaps the vodka gimlet sparked with lemongrass oil. A wide selection of wine and beer is also available. During Snack Hour, dive into a generous bowl of peel-and-eat shrimp or indulge in fresh oysters on the half shell. The Early Bird Charcuterie Board is a gorgeously displayed collection of meats, cheeses, Doux South pickles and honeycomb served with crispy flatbread.

If you opt for the CP Happy Burger, be sure to request extra napkins to help contain the melty goodness. Two Wagyu beef patties are layered with caramelized onions, American cheese, house ketchup and mustard. As the menu transitions from Snack Hour to dinner service, ask for the chef’s Wagyu burger topped with crispy bacon and Maytag blue cheese. Go fullsouth at dinner with the Pecan Fried Chicken, featuring pecan-crusted chicken breasts served atop a cream cheese potato puree, or try the House Smoked Pork Tenderloin with a bourbon-cherry glaze and vanilla sweet potato puree.

Visit frequently to enjoy Featherstone’s creative daily specials. These beautifully presented plates are expertly prepared and often feature fresh seafood such as black grouper, moonfish or mussels. City Pharmacy is an ideal place to try unique ingredients— such as bison or duck confit—not likely to be found on any other Covington menu.

City Pharmacy is located at 1105 Church Street, and reservations are recommended. Arrive Tuesday through Sunday between 4 p.m. and 6 p.m. for snacks and cocktails, or come after 5 p.m. for dinner service. The restaurant closes nightly at 9 p.m. and is closed on Mondays. For more information, visit CityPharmacyCov.com or call 470-441-5092.