It's all about Children (Supplement) by The Malta Independent

children Itâ€™s all about

The Malta Independent on Sunday MARCH 2016

MARCH 2016

children

Stepping out

Why do the words ‘let’s go for a walk’ raise more groans than grins with so many of us?

THE BENEFITS OF WALKING FOR PREGNANT OR NEW MOMS.... Walking is such a terrific way to stay fit. You can adjust the time and pack to fit and suit your needs. All you need is the will to move and a good pair of walking shoes. Scholl sneakers with Scholl Biomechanics® technology, featuring a lightweight sole and a Triplanar control system insole that improves the posture and alignment of the foot and ensures extra comfort when walking. The PU and fabric upper provides great breathability for the foot, excellent for long walks. Available from all Scholl Foothealth Centres – www.schollfoothealthcentre.com

FIRST STEPS FORWARD Start-rite has a special range of pre-walkers designed just for the in-between stage, allowing free movement with gentle support and protection for infants’ toes and heels. Start-rite pre-walkers have the following features: • A choice of fittings in whole and half sizes to ensure the best possible fit. • Softest nubuck or leather with cool, breathable linings for maximum comfort. • Lightweight and flexible soles, because it's difficult enough getting around at the moment without added weight. • The shape of the shoe follows the contours of the baby's feet. • Rubber toe and heel bumpers offer security and grip as your baby is moving around and trying to walk. At this age, you might prefer to get your child's shoes fitted by a professionally trained fitter. Visit us at one of the Scholl Centres found in Valletta, Fgura, Mosta, Plaza Shopping Centre, The Point Tigne and Abela’s Health and Beauty Centre in Gozo. View the full range at www.schollfootheathcentre.com

t takes so much bribery and begging to encourage most children to use their legs when a car, or even a bus, is so much less effort. Mention nanna and nannu who thought nothing of walking several kilometres to school and back and the school run generation stares in disbelief. One thing that does prompt the patter of any feet, however, is a new pair of shoes. And, unlike 50 or 60 years ago there is a wide choice of original and inspiring designs for children today. Whether you are buying party shoes, or heavy duty shoes, for indoors or out, your choice will affect the health of your children’s feet well into adulthood. All footwear, especially sports shoes and dancing shoes should always be the very best you can afford and bought from specialist shoe stores and departments. It’s not easy to ignore the tears and tantrums, or silent sulks that arise if a child is forbidden the sort of technicolour footwear, normally seen on a Disney princess, that she has set her heart on. But this is never a good choice. It will be uncomfortable and unwearable within weeks. Anything with a character theme is best left for slippers. They can still be shown off proudly at sleepovers. Children will cheerfully claim shoes tight enough to torture them are comfortable if they are the exact style and colour they want. But following these guides will help you avoid putting your foot in it when making the final choice. Look for experienced staff, who know about the shoes they are selling, and have the patience to

A child should be standing up straight and wearing snugfitting socks to make sure the shoes fit comfortably turn trying on 50 different pairs of shoes into a fun experience. A child should be standing up straight and wearing snug-fitting socks to make sure the shoes fit comfortably. There should be a space of 1.5 cm to 2 cm between the longest toe and the end of the shoe to allow space for the toes spread, giving comfort and good stability. The front of the shoe should not be tight over the top of the foot and there should be space to wiggle the toes. Make sure the back of the shoe fits well to avoid blisters and the shoe coming off, which can happen if it is too loose. Loose shoes also cause children to walk awkwardly which can lead to problems later. These problems can also appear if the material at the back of the shoe is too light and soft to support the

heel. Check also that the shoe has a well-fitting contoured support for the arch of the foot. Flexing the ankles from side to side and pressing, the outer edges of a child's foot will show up any points of friction, which will lead to calluses or contribute to foot injury. Friction also may be caused by shoes that are too large or heavy for your child's foot and leg. If you can feel the toes are pressed up against the shoe it is obviously too small. Luckily, these days there is an excellent choice of styles for boys and girls from toddlers to teens so you should certainly have no problem getting that perfect fit.

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MARCH 2016

TIME FOR BED

No longer just a place to sleep in, children’s bedrooms are becoming design projects in their own right.

t any age bedrooms are personal spaces. A child’s bedroom is somewhere to chill out, study, play and, of course, sleep. It is also the one place in the home which is their very own and from an early age they will want to make it feel that way, with decorations, toys and accessories that appeal to them. This is all the more important when children share a room, especially if they have quite different tastes and personalities. Each one will want his, or her, own little corner of the world so there are bound to be clashes, arguments and issues of privacy and personal space. Precious possessions may not be up for sharing, especially if there is quite a big age gap between children in the same room. Different bed times may also cause a disturbance. But sharing is also a brilliant way for children to learn to respect someone else’s property and to share and put their points of view clearly and fairly. Nervous children will welcome the company of someone in the same room at night. And children who share a bedroom spend far more time creating projects or just playing together. With a little thought and by involving the children themselves it is certainly possible to create a haven of happy days and restful nights. Each child must have a space of their own for their things, which the other should respect as ‘private’. If the younger children have no concept of privacy, creating these areas out of the reach of

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the little ones or giving the elder child a drawer or cupboard the others cannot open will help them feel more in control. If possible each child should have a desk or bedside table and shelves and drawers of their own and their choice of bed covers, cushions and rugs to define their space. Corkboards by each bed will give everyone the same amount of space to put up their own posters and paintings. Children can also decorate plain wooden boxes to make their own individual storage boxes; which could double as seats or bedside tables. Those who are old enough should also have their own small bedside light so they don’t disturb the others if they wake or get up in the night.

CREATING BOUNDARIES WITH BUNK BEDS, A DECORATED SCREEN, BOOK SHELVES OR EVEN A SMALL SOFA OR BEANBAG SEATING CAN ALSO HELP EACH CHILD FEEL THAT THEIR BED AREA IS ALSO THEIR OWN ‘ROOM’ Creating boundaries with bunk beds, a decorated screen, book shelves or even a small sofa or beanbag seating can also help each child feel that their bed area is also their own ‘room’. This should be considered private, with children needing permission or having to give a prearranged password before sitting on each other’s bed or going to someone’s cupboard or shelf. There are as many themes for children’s bedrooms today as you can possibly imagine. And yet it has never been so easy to find combinations of furniture that can be designed and arranged to make these rooms a reality. Children will treasure and take pride in their rooms and bedtime battles will be a thing of the past as they curl up in their special safe place at the end of the day.

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MARCH 2016

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PLACES TO

PLAY

It may not have Disney World or Universal Studios but Malta itself is as good as a theme park.

ith Easter holidays just around the corner now is the time to plan some cheap and cheerful trips and activities that will get everyone out and about and create plenty of happy memories.

Most family trips need to cater for different ages so either let each child in turn choose one place or activity, or do some research and pick locations and attractions that offer something for children of all ages. Turn a trip into a treasure hunt. Before setting off for an outing, make a list of some of the things you want to look

for, based on the places you choose. This could include buildings with something different or striking about them, plants and wild life or unusual pieces of driftwood and sea flotsam. You could take a magnifying glass to examine the tiniest plants and insects. Another way to pep up a picnic anywhere you like is to turn it into an artists’

location and paint or sketch whatever you see there that catches your eye, using any

style that grabs your imagination. Continues on page 8

Mediterraneo Marine Park promotes marine life conservation against the stunning backdrop of the Mediterranean Sea, offering entertainment alongside a unique learning experience.

s Malta's only marine park, The ‘Mediterraneo’ is a leading island attraction with tourists and locals alike. Boasting an enviable coastal location, the park promotes interactive participation with a varied selection of marine mammals including dolphins and sea lions; parrots and reptiles. Enjoying Malta's sunny climate, The Mediterraneo Marine Park remains open all year round. The park is conveniently located just off the main coast road enabling good transport links from most hotels and tourist accommodation. Part of the Costa Edutainment-Costa Parchi Spa group, since July 2012, The Mediterraneo Marine Park advocates animal welfare through an interactive learning environment inspired by their motto "Education, Emotion and FUN". Visitors may participate in various animal interaction programmes which provide superb entertainment whilst increasing awareness and conservation responsibilities. The park has three main programmes which are held daily: The

Marvellous marine creatures, up close Dolphin Presentation, The Sea Lion Presentation and the Parrot Presentation. On 31st October, 2014 the park welcomed the arrival of a female baby dolphin and named it Melita This summer Melita will be an added attraction, to the daily Dolphin Presentation. On the 1st May, 2015 a new Vivarium was opened, proudly hosting several reptiles amongst which are Iguanas, Water Monitors and Boas. A spacious outdoor compound ‘Tortoise Land’ has also been added for the enjoyment of visitors. All of these presentations and exhibits offer an amazing experience to aid a better understanding of the animals and an appreciation of their individual characteristics. The highlight of any visit to The Mediterraneo Marine Park has to be the Dolphin SWIM programme - a truly unique and once in a lifetime experience that is not to be missed! Some of the other species that visitors can also expect to see include green wing Macaw, Amazons, Snakes, Tortoises, Turtles, Frogs, Toads, Spiders, Scorpions and Lizards.

DIDACTIC PROGRAMMES FOR PRIMARY & SECONDARY STUDENTS Specific educational programmes based on four animal areas: Reptiles, Parrots, Sea Lions and Dolphins.

TEAM BUILDING DAYS Ideal for Corporate Companies/Organisations wishing to have their personnel teams indulge on a relaxing and fun outing. For enquires please email your requests on: info@mediterraneopark.com or reservations@mediterraneopark.com Bahar ic-Caghaq, Malta +356 2137 2218 +356 2137 6519 info@mediterraneopark.com www.mediterraneopark.com

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MARCH 2016

Children’s playground in Victoria

MARCH 2016

PLACES TO

PLAY continued from page 6

While little ones are happy just to cycle around or play on playground equipment older brothers and sisters could make a short family movie, choosing scenes and locations to create a storyboard and filming them on a phone or tablet. Printing and sharing stills from the shoot will keep memories of the day alive for everyone. Our islands’ natural coastlines, woods and valleys may be limited in size compared with other countries, but they are full of exciting places to explore. In towns and villages there are curious streets and buildings to discover and even the public playgrounds are expanding and introducing colourful new equipment to make them a lot safer and more attractive. Some public parks and play grounds are positively off putting with signs all over their gates forbidding any of the activities children enjoy! Others, which welcome tricycles, scooters and the family dog, are a delight. One of the best examples of these parks is Rundle Gardens, in Victoria, which has several sections of beautifully kept plants, a bridged pond with fountains, children’s rides and clean cloakrooms. Cats enjoy foody treats from its visitors, children take school breaks in its shady spots and dog walkers meet for a chat. And guess what. It is still

one of the cleanest, most attractive havens to be found. Also in Victoria is the newly restored playground near the bus terminus. Victoria mayor, Samuel Azzopardi, explained how this transformation came about saying that the main considerations when selecting the design and content of the playground were to have a fully accessible playground where all family members can join in the fun. The council did not want to create a place that appealed only to a particular age group. And, given today’s restrictions on quality time with one’s children, their architects were specifically requested to keep in mind that with the little amount available today all the family want to have fun in one place. The playground will be officially opened in June in the week when Victoria Day is celebrated, commemorating the 129th anniversary of when the

WE WANTED TO PROVIDE THE CHILDREN AND YOUNG ADULTS OF VICTORIA, TOGETHER WITH THEIR FAMILIES, A PLACE TO HAVE FUN, RIGHT IN THE CENTRE OF OUR BELOVED CITY.

Children exploring the new Victoria playground

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town of Rabat was proclaimed Victoria and conferred the title of city by the then reigning Queen of the United Kingdom Victoria. Mr Azzopardi added: “The children of Victoria yearned for a fully upgraded playground. We wanted to provide the children and young adults of Victoria, together with their families, a place to have fun, right in the centre of our beloved city. The people of Victoria all have fond memories of this playground inaugurated in the 1960s being the first modern playground in Gozo. We wanted to keep the same layout but provide an improved experience" Already local children and visitors are clearly delighted with their playground and so are their parents. And when you don’t want to stay in one place, why not go on a mystical tour. Just get on a bus you’ve never taken before and stay on till it reaches its destination. Discover what you can about wherever you end up, then take a different route home. Going on an open top bus will make the journey even more exciting. On another day try going to sea. Visit a marine park or take the Grand Harbour ferry and cruises. And crossing from Valletta to Sliema and Cirkewwa to Comino are all fun ways to see familiar places from a different point of view. This is also a good time of year to try a new sport or project. What about following in the footsteps of Malta’s knights and taking up archery, fencing and horse riding. Classes for all three can be found and who knows what lively hobbies they could become. For something less energetic try pottery, music, theatre, cookery, art and craft classes. If it’s too cold for sea swimming just yet, indoor pools are ideal for children who want to try water sports or learn to swim in warm water and safe surroundings before hitting the beaches later in the year. Classes and lessons can be booked and by summer they will be full of confidence and ready to enjoy the seaside even more. And if the weather is not good enough to be outside, there are plenty of indoor attractions like the Playmobil funpark and various historical displays and permanent exhibitions to choose from. Let no one say Malta’s size limits the opportunities we have to see and do something new whenever we have the chance. And let’s make 2016 the year we grab as many chances as we can to enjoy the simple pleasure of getting together with friends and family to have fun.

Quality by tradition

ssociated Marketing Ltd is a family owned company which boasts of over twenty five years experience in the production and distribution of office and school stationery products. We have been proudly producing “Diplomat” stationery products for the past 15 years and the brand name “Diplomat” is now synonimous with the name of our company. As we strive to offer a comprehensive service to our clients , we not only produce but also import a vast range of stationery products of the highest quality from various parts of the world.

Long term satisfaction and close relationship with our clients are our main concerns and with the co-operation of our various suppliers we are continuously committed to offer high quality products at the best possible competitive prices to all our customers. We therefore proudly emphasise our motto: quality by tradition.

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MARCH 2016

Happy, healthy smiles Early care can save your child from toothache and ensure healthy teeth for life.

elieve it or not, babies’ teeth can begin to decay from the moment they appear, at about the age of six months. Two causes of decay in babies and toddlers are also their source of nourishment and comfort -- a pacifier dipped in chocolate spread or honey, and their feeding bottle. Children who spend a long time sucking a bottle containing fruit juices, sweetened drinks and even formula and milk are at risk. The sugar content of these liquids coats the teeth and feeds the bacteria in any plaque that has formed on them. Every time a child consumes a sugary liquid acid produced by these bacteria attacks the teeth and gums and decay begins. This mostly appears on the top front teeth but it can affect the other teeth too. Sometimes teeth are so damaged by decay that they cannot be saved and end up being removed. Although these teeth will be replaced by the second set of teeth, losing teeth before they would naturally fall out can have repercussions. Speech and jaw development may be affected and the other teeth can suffer from extra wear. Keeping all 20 baby teeth as long as possible will ensure plenty of room for the ones that follow and help prevent misalignment when they come through. Tooth decay also comes with the risk of gum disease and infections that can spread through the whole body; an extra reason to ensure someone so young and small avoids it. This is easily done from even before the teeth come through by wiping a baby’s mouth and gums

with a clean damp gauze or soft cloth. A baby’s top and bottom front four teeth will appear between six and 12 or 14 months. This is the time to read up on the benefits of fluoride and calcium on children’s teeth and to begin brushing them thoroughly morning and evening using a tiny amount of toothpaste. A squeeze of toothpaste the size of a pea is enough for children from three to six. By four years old they should already be on friendly terms with their dentist. Avoid negative anticipation and nervousness, by booking a first visit well before a child starts school and certainly before an emergency can occur. Children pick up on another person’s anxiety and will possibly view the session with suspicion or even fear. To be sure visits to the dentist are not the dreaded appointments they were decades ago, choose a child-friendly dentist from personal recommendations as well as qualifications. Visits should give children a chance to learn the best techniques for brushing and how to ensure they will have healthy, white teeth to show off at every one of their appointments. As children get older teeth brushing becomes an automatic habit. But there will be many who see no harm in skipping the ritual, if they are in a hurry or too tired to bother. These children are quite old enough to benefit from a gentle reminder of what it would be like to lose their teeth forever! Print out a few images of rotting teeth and Google I wish I’d looked after my teeth, a hilarious poem by Pam Ayers, which says it all but will still make you

CURAKID TOOTHBRUSH - A MUST FOR EVERY BABY AND CHILD Fun for babies and toddlers: the extra narrow brush head and soft plastic covering of our unique CuraKid toothbrush prevents any injuries to delicate gums. Developed in collaboration with the University of Berne and orthodontists in Switzerland this is a perfect starter toothbrush for kids. Amazingly this brush offers 4,260 bristles on its compact head each with a diameter of 0.1 mm. The advantages are obvious: • No danger of injury thanks to its small, rubberized brush head • A perfect fit for children’s and parents’ hands • Rounded handle reduces pressure to a minimum • Made of anti-slip material in fantastic colour combinations • Finally, babies can enjoy having their teeth cleaned. A must for every baby and child. CuraKid toothbrushes are exclusively distributed by Chemimart Tel: 21492212

MARCH 2016

A baby’s first years of life are filled with exploration as they begin to learn about themselves and the world in which they live. Playgro understands the importance of play in this developmental journey and create fun, innovative toys that engage babies’ senses, stimulate their imagination and encourage movement and play. Younger babies can enjoy the bright colours and patterns, and listen intently to shaking, squeaking and rattling sounds. Older

babies begin to explore the world with eyes, hands, feet and mouths. The Playgro Age for Stage guide helps parents select the most age appropriate products for their little one. The guide can be found on all Playgro packaging, making it easy for parents to find a product that best suits their baby’s stage of development.

Munchkin offers your child a wide range of colourful, interactive toys that make bath time fun and enjoyable. From a Bath Fun Bubble Blower, Undersea Explorer, Bath Tea and Cupcake Sets and a large

selection of bath toys, Munchkin is sure to keep your child entertained. With their bright and vibrant colours Munchkin toys are designed to help engage sensory skills as well as encourage your child to learn how to develop play patterns and interactive play. Munchkin also offers a wide range of feeding bottles, spill proof cups, training cups, flip straw cups, dining sets, door bouncers, safety car mirrors, backpacks and much more.

Playgro Developmental Toys are exclusively distributed by Alfred Gera & Sons Ltd. on Tel 21 446205/6.

Munchkin is found in leading supermarket, pharmacies and baby shops and is exclusively distributed by Alfred Gera & Sons Ltd, Tel: 21446205/6. Munchkin…It’s the little things.

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From a baby’s first moment

Endless advice is available for first time mothers and choosing the best will help ensure a happy, healthy pregnancy.

magine a time when the waiting rooms in mother and baby clinics were full of mothers smoking. In pubs and bars, happy mothers to be celebrated their joy with several glasses of wine, or even spirits. No one bothered how much soft cheese, paté, fried food or cakes they ate, or how much alcohol they drank. And as for watching their weight, well everyone reminded them that they were “eating for two now”, so they could guzzle away happily on whatever they craved. It all seems impossible in this day and age. Thank goodness we now know how misleading and even dangerous those habits were. Mothers today realise they must be in the best of health from the moment they decide to start a family and that what they eat and their lifestyle and environment can have a very real effect on their baby’s development. And, as many mothers are now working well into pregnancy they must feel free to do all they need to address the issues this will bring. There is endless advice available and some of it can look quite scary. The important thing is to choose the advice you follow wisely, from people with experience, whom you trust and who have your best wellbeing at heart. Everyone is different and you need what’s best for you and your baby. Research has taught us the importance of a healthy diet and supplements like folic acid. What you eat and drink has a crucial effect on the health of your baby. Adopt the healthiest diet you can. Avoid meats which have been exposed to high doses of antibiotics, fish that may have a high mercury content and foods which are processed, have been exposed to pesticides or pollutants or are high in saturated fats and sugar. Seek the best food you

can find and enjoy compiling as many delicious menus as you can to include them all. Keeping well hydrated is vital because your baby is drinking too. You should choose glassbottled water or use tap water treated through a home filter jug and keep your drinking water in glass or steel bottles. As your baby grows so will your appetite. You may feel hungry all the time but this can be eased with just a piece of fruit or a few nuts. Keeping to a healthy weight helps prevent gestational diabetes, diabetes that develops during pregnancy, and any complications caused by high blood pressure. We have also learned how vital regular exercise is as well, even if the sofa has more appeal than usual. It is not only very important it will also create a real feel good factor. Choose something suitable and not too strenuous, that you can do in company or in an environment you really enjoy such as by the sea or in an airy open space. The value of having a good breathing pattern and keeping the right muscles both toned and able to relax cannot be over estimated. Nowadays, there are also many mothers who work well into pregnancy and they must feel free to do all they need to accommodate all these habits during their working day. But babies in the womb are not just growing physically. While there is no proof that their intelligence can actually be improved by mothers playing music or reading stories to them, natural everyday movements and sounds are likely to teach them a lot about the world they will soon be part of. By the age of 23 weeks babies are able to hear sounds and respond to touch. Their mother’s voice and the music they hear, even the taste of the food their mother eats will be familiar to them when they encounter them after birth. The loveliest ways to care for unborn babies are by creating and maintaining the safest place for them to grow, getting to know their moods and personality from their movements, massaging, singing and talking to them often and having everything ready to welcome them into the world.

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MARCH 2016

ARE YOU READY FOR A NEW FAMILY MEMBER? Here are the best reasons to say yes to the pet.

t’s not just children who love animals, and most of us would love to keep a pet if we had the time, energy, patience, space and ability to solve the issues that prevent a furry, feathered or finned friend being welcomed into our home. Over 50 % of children have a pet in their lives at some time and even it that makes nearly 100% of adults who do most of the caring, that just makes a vast number of people who have a little bit of extra love in their lives. So here are a few good reasons why you really should give it some thought next time someone asks: “When can I have a pet?” Pets teach responsibility and caring. The time children spend exercising, feeding, grooming and cleaning up after their pets has a direct affect on the

health and happiness of the pet and the enjoyment the family get from having it. Knowing this will give young pet owners a sense of pride when their pet is admired and an extra bond with it. The feelings of friendship, security and comfort that owners can get from curling up with a pet cannot be over estimated. Children who have various fears or are shy and uneasy with adults or other children will feel safe with a pet. Pets, especially cats and dogs, communicate but will never tell your secrets! They do not judge or tease or base their affection on their owners’ achievements, finances, qualifications or looks. They simply need care and company which they will repay with the love they give and loyalty they show. Pets are great educators. Training a pet needs discipline and gives children

confidence. Discussing and choosing pets and their different species, breeds, origins and habits encourages research. When homework has to take the place of playing with a pet children can still be with them by quietly reading the subjects they are studying to their pet. And sharing what they study can even make it easier to remember. Projects using dogs in schools have show that children who are scared of reading in front of their peers are quite happy to read for a school visitor with four paws. Pets are good for health. Yes, there is the allergy issue but it is far from impossible to find some creature that will make a good pet. And since so many children grow out of their allergies they may well be able to have a pet by the time they are able to really contribute to its care. Studies actually

BEST BEHAVIOUR

How can parents deter bad behaviour now that old fashioned corporal punishments are thankfully illegal?

hen we read about riotous children being banned from restaurants, pre teens going joyriding and a young boy ringing a child abuse hot line because his mother would not let him see a film he wanted to watch, we must wonder why children’s behaviour today seems to be worse than ever and whether being a parent is harder than ever. Do your children get away with a whole lot more than you did when you were their age? Today’s world gives them so many more opportunities and ideas of what they can expect or want. Plus, as is constantly being pointed out to them, they have rights. In less than two generations parents, teachers and everyone working with or caring for children have had to totally rethink their approach to discipline. So with six of the best replaced by the naughty step and “because I say so” translated into “OK, let’s talk about this” how can we instill the kind of behaviour that was expected of us in our children today. Schools have very strict guidelines about what punishments are acceptable and appropriate, but some children have no fear of these. Teachers and parents need to be in agreement about how children are disciplined. It’s just not easy. Today’s parenting advice suggests the sort of verbal reasoning communications that would defeat a United Nations negotiator, never mind an exhausted working mother. No one wants to hear mutters of disapproval or squirm under glances of disdain while their adored children shriek in cinemas, run around restaurants or ignore all attempts to communicate because they are tied to their tablets. So where to start? Blind obedience under pain of dire punishment is long gone, which may or may not be a good thing depending on your point of view. Now the

show that that animals can help protect kids from at least some illnesses and children growing up in a home with pets actually have a decreased risk of developing certain allergies. Playing with pets helps children with coordination and exercising them during walks and games outside certainly promotes fitness. Pets complete a family by being there of each member, by providing entertainment though their tricks and playfulness, or their visual appearance. Events and outings involving pets can become inexpensive and amusing treats for the whole family. New places will be discovered and new friends with other pet owners will be made. But the best of it all will be that your pet really will become a very important member of the family.

modern parent has embraced the psychological approach, or in other words… bribery. This is fine until the stakes become too high, or several siblings require different enticements for the same result. Being masters of the art of manipulation even the sweetest little mites are going to milk this to

their advantage and complain bitterly if one seems to be getting a reward for doing what another is naturally willing to do for nothing. Good behaviour should be valued in its own right and because it makes the child and everyone else’s life easier, safer and happier; otherwise they are in danger of becoming spoilt little brats, with a sense of entitlement that lasts well into adulthood. The very best way for children to learn this is simply by example and experience from all the time they spend with their parents. But so many families today don’t have that luxury. Working mothers, who already cannot be watching and leading their children as much as they would like, do not want to spend the precious time they have together nagging about manners and bad behaviour. They certainly don’t want their children to see them only as someone who is always telling them off or finding fault. It’s easier to overlook or fail to discourage antisocial and even quite disruptive actions rather than create a scene. Too little quality time and the natural urge to make sure children never feel disadvantaged because their mothers work have also led to a deluge of treats and gifts which parents feel they can’t withhold, even if the children do something naughty. Whatever the demands and distractions of family life and the ever-changing theories and advice bombarding parents from every angle, children are never really happy without firm but flexible guidelines accompanied, of course with the innate feeling that they are loved and secure. If they have them this, and learn the value of face to face socialising, sharing, considering others, enjoying the company of family and friends and being the best they can be, it will be worth all the extra effort that being a 21st century parent demands.

MARCH 2016

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HELPING HANDS IN THE FAMILY HOME If your children don’t have household jobs to do you risk delaying their development, or so the researchers say.

esearchers have a way of claiming whatever they want and plenty of children, especially teens, can come up with a million and one reasons why lifting a finger around the house, without hefty financial compensation, could stunt their development permanently. However, when children contribute to family life it really does help them. Getting kids involved in chores can minimise stress and help the family function better. By taking a fair share of household jobs children gain a sense of ability and responsibility. It gives even the youngest family members an idea of what it takes to run a happy home and a sense of pride in helping their parents and siblings. They also grow up more self sufficient and able to take responsibility and work better with other people. Parents who keep their complaints about all the housework they have to do, and the jobs they hate, as quiet as possible will pass on to their children the acceptance of housework as something that just has to be done, not an imposition on their

time. From an early as age these children will then be happy to help, when they are old enough to be useful! Turn tidying bedrooms, dumping laundry, keeping their clothes, toys and school books in order into a game and you have a head start. The children will join in and as they grow up certain tasks, like these, will be taken for granted. For this reason it is probably best to keep money rewards for special jobs, which fall outside the everyday ones we must all expect to do. Use them instead for something extra demanding or to fund a special treat or family outing. The smallest child will find fun in running about collecting toys or sweeping and dusting, in places where they cannot get into trouble or break something precious. Of course, most tasks are quicker and easier without the accompaniment of lively little ones, but the extra effort is worth it for the time you have together. And when more and more families have both parents working, this is valuable time. Jobs like gardening, cooking and shopping can even be good

fun for older children, who are often eager to help when they are able to have a say in what they create or buy. In fact, as some jobs are obviously more undesirable than others it is a good idea for children of similar ages to take it in turns when these crop up, or negotiate who takes the easiest and who takes the nastiest job as fairly as possible. And remember, a horrid job can be less nasty and completed faster if two people tackle it together. Every home will have its own rules and rhythms because as children grow and their interests and timetables vary adjustments will need to be made. In some cases children have to do more than just odd jobs. They take on a serious responsibility for certain chores when, for example a family member is ill or the family’s circumstances change for the worse. When this happens, close relatives and friends can be a huge support and everything possible should be done to ensure that whatever their responsibilities, none of these youngsters misses out on a proper, happy childhood. But back to the teenagers for

Don’t just give up

enitence, sacrifice and almsgiving are three penitential practices that we are asked to engage in during Lent. In addition to fasting and abstaining on Ash Wednesday and the Fridays of Lent, we are also challenged to make individual sacrifices. So this is to invite students to

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examine more their personal conduct and behavior mostly at school and at home. Giving up sweets, television time, snacks between meals, video games etc. are all good practices which can help us to control ourselves when tempted by something sinful! However, it would be more appropriate if students were to ex-

Turning down children’s offers of help or showing them you can do a job better will soon put them off. And if children find a task too hard or boring they will quickly want to give up, so offer jobs they will be able to manage and complete easily. This can begin when they are as young as three to five when they can pick up their toys and clothes, use a dust pan and brush, help feed pets and pack their school bags. At 6 to 8 years old they can help lay and clear the table, sweep the floor, carry and put away groceries, fold the laundry and put their clothes away. By the ages of nine to 12 children years old can wash the car, do the washing up, and help prepare meals, do the hovering and feed, groom and clean out their pets. Teenagers can do the laundry, make grocery lists, prepare meals, and clean kitchen appliances and bathrooms and baby sit for their siblings. whom anything and everything has more priority than house stuff. This has become invisible and the least of their worries. Life is too hectic, they are too tired, hungry, bored, excited, skint, or drained by all their studying to give chores a thought. Food can be snatched from anywhere, clothes will appear washed and ready somehow and if they don’t notice the mess why should anyone else worry about it? If said mess is confined to their

own rooms and these are not actually a world environmental and health hazard, it’s probably easier to think “just another phase”, and let it go. After all if the preteen version was brought up as an angel of assistance then that’s who will reemerge eventually. At the end of the day a family’s health and happiness is what’s most important. And that, some people might say, is more from harmony than house work.

With nearly three more weeks of Lent to go, student, Jean Luka Vella suggests how we can make our efforts relate to today’s world.

amine their consciences regarding their manners and behaviour towards others at school, home and in town. We came up with a short list of questions which can surely help us students improve our conduct and behavior: What type of language do we use with others? Gentle or rough? Nice or foul?

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How many times are we tempted to gossip about others? When someone fails or makes mistakes do we ridicule him? Are we humble enough to accept corrections from our parents, teachers or leaders? Do we allow our friends space to express their own opinions, even if they are contrary to ours? How do we react when we get angry or when we lose a game? How many times do we blame others for our own mistakes? Are we on time for our lessons and meetings? And do we allow our teachers space to deliver their lessons without interrupting all the time? Are we sensitive enough to the needs of others? Do we hold any racist sentiments in our hearts? How quick we are to judge others? And are we humble enough to apologise to others when we make mistakes or disappoint them? Are we doing our duties well at school, work and home?

Are we spending more time on the internet and computer games than with our families? Lent is a great opportunity for us to grow not only spiritually but also socially. So hopefully these questions can serve as a challenge to improve our daily lives. So, Lent will be a positive and fruitful experience.