The Jungle Drums - July 2009

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this month 5 ANDREA... the AGM...

9 THE TROUBLE WITH SPAIN kids...

15 DIVING scuba dooby doo... 17 NATURE fluffy things with feathers... 19 SANTA POLA... he’s off again...

19 NIGEL JARDINE... get motivated by the best...! 21 GRAN ALACANT... designer stuff..

23 LA MARINA... neighbours...

24/5 CATRAL... a look locally...

31 COMPUTERS the top experts offer advice... 33 MOTORING IN SPAIN sound advice from the best... 34/5 PUZZLES... if you is smart try these fings... 36/7 LIVING LIFE... a wry look at life in spain... 39 HOROSCOPES it’s all in the bars...

41 WHAT’S ON... the BEST guide around...! 44/5 BUSINESS DIRECTORY... you definitive guide to local biz...

uch more!

and much m

What are you putting in YOUR mouth? You know what it’s like – you get a song in your head and can’t get rid of it. You find yourself humming along without even realising it and, usually, that’s fine. but I’ve had one banging around inside my bonce for the last few weeks and it’s not doing my reputation (yeah, ok.) any good. You remember that old Tom Robinson song ‘Sing if you’re glad to be gay’? well I can’t seem to get it out of my head and I’m not sure what that means. Am I? Do I want to be? Worrying, ‘cos I like Eurovision too, and Abba. Crikey, this is not going where it was meant to but I guess, on the plus side, I’ll finally mange to sort out the soft furnishings at home… So it’s summer and time to ‘live the life’ by getting out of the house, locking the front door and spending the next couple of months eating, drinking, swimming and stumbling home. It’s good to see people smiling a lot more even if the main reason is that they are carrying a few extra gallons of liquid courtesy of John Smith. And smelling the aromas from neighbouring barbecues is always a hunger-inducing moment on a summer evening. But do yourself a favour and check what you’re munching at these do’s as more and more people are watching the chefs on TV and fancying themselves as a bit of a decent cook. Marinating a sausage in lager doesn’t quite count for fine cuisine and some of the stuff I’ve seen, I’ll agree, has most certainly come from a farmyard…the only thing I’d question (by the look and the taste of it) is whether it is an animal…or came out of an animal and I don’t mean an egg. Whatever, by the time you’ve got third degree burns from sitting around the pool during the day and quenched your thirst with what the Spanish use as anti-freeze, in the early eve you’ll be more than happy to eat whatever is put in front of you. but be warned, the last time I did this I was quite happily munching on the meat dish when Javi, my host, informed me that my current mouthful had been hanging between the legs of a runner at Kempton Park until just recently…it’s that bloody song…I’m cursed. We lost one of our longest serving contributors last month when Brain Conduit passed away following a period suffering from that bastard of all diseases...cancer. I say suffer, but Brian faced it with humour and was more positive than i know i would be. As Malcolm Palmer said at the funeral...’he was one of the good guys...’ and he was. See ya Brian...is it hot or have you somehow wangled your way in upstairs...?

Like Ronaldo does it…but with goggles

Jungle Drums editor, Dave Bull took the plunge this month by signing up with Santa Pola Dive Academy to learn to, er…dive? Not the high board stuff of course, no, Dave will be donning a rubber suit and goggles (out of the house this time…) and learning the skills needed to be a Scuba Diver. Along with his son Mitch he’ll be reporting back on how they get on (of course if he drowns we’ll put in article about the weather or something…). Find out how they got on - page 15 Please note that our deadlines are as follows: Adverts/Editorials. 15th each month. Letters: 20th each month Any items received by The Jungle Drums after these dates cannot be guaranteed publication in the following months issue - although we will try our best! Phone: 96 669 5141 Email: ask@thejungledrums.com Website: www.thejungledrums.com Editor: Dave Bull Dep.legal: A-1068-2004 Impresora: Albagraf. Albacete

While every effort is taken to ensure that mistakes are kept to a minimum, the Jungle Drums, its publisher and staff accept no responsibility for claims made by advertisers or respondents replying to adverts. Nor can it be held responsible for any errors or inaccuracies in their advertisements. The Jungle Drums reserves the right to change, alter and update any part of this publication including adverts and pictures without the consent of the original author or source. E&0E No part of this publication, printed or online, may be used or reproduced without the written consent of the publisher

Jungle Drums - 96 669 5141 - 686 790 457 - ask@thejungledrums.com

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oming up very shortly, in August,

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order to exercise your right to vote. Any owner in a community who owes fees to

meeting but not to vote.

community, apart from losing your voting

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and the agenda. If you have any issues

easier to embargo the property of owners who don’t pay their community fees.

inform your Administration about your

for it to be put on the agenda.

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If you are currently in debt with your

As a member of the community of prop-

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the debtors’ blacklist that is sent along

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right you might not wish to appear on

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SPANISH WILLS

Spain simply because that is the time of the year when most house owners

andrea burns

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non-payment, an embargo is placed on

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the property.

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We all know the Spanish love their kids but do they really need to keep them in a pushchair until they’re fourteen? In Britain it’s a bit different because by the time mum and dad have got back from work having synchronized their BlackBerries, ‘networked’ over a cup of turd-flavoured dish water, or Starbucks as it’s now called, and picked the kids up from the child-minders, there is barely enough time to send them a goodnight text before ‘I’m a celebrity big brother talent show’ starts on TV. Yes, the Spaniards have a lot more time for their kids but what is alarming is how long they make them stay kids for. Ok, so in Britain we’re teaching them the fine art of wielding a knife by the time they’re three and we start looking for friends who have a house near to the school we want them to go to (in 10 year’s time) so that they can learn to stab someone properly while having a fag. But in Spain it’s a bit different. Yes there are thugs, yobs and losers (or the French as they’re commonly known) but these youngsters fear no-one. Noone that is apart from their mother, grandmother, aunty…or their older sister. Do something wrong and one of these will soon find out from a neighbour or friend and then there is hell to pay. These

formidable women have a tongue so sharp they can cut you down at twenty paces and a pitch of voice that makes a pneumatic road drill sound like a child’s music box. Cross them at your peril because if little (or often, not-solittle) Juan has done something wrong, a dressing down in the local plaza in front of his mates and half the town’s population is common place. And woe betide the one who answers back because a cuff round the ear followed by a march home is the only reward he’ll get. I’m not sure who’s got it right really, the Brits with kids trained in advance communications and the ability to shave with a machete or the Spanish with children who are still happy to eat with their parents, and be pushed around in a pram until they’re ready to start work. One thing for sure is come the next war I’d rather have the British kids defending us than the Spaniards, who’ll be lined up behind the female members of their family…on second thoughts…

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IN ABOVE MY HEAD? Or Scuba for idiots…. By Dave Bull So there I was. Standing on the Carabasi beach, dressed in rubber and waiting for another bloke dressed in rubber to join me. Before you start thinking all the rumours are true, my son Mitch was with me, and we were going diving. Well actually I don’t think we were going to go out of our depth but by the time this story gets back home…I’ll have been searching a wreck for sunken treasure while battling Stingrays and Sharks, and other big wet things. I’ve always wanted to dive – ever since I tried it out in the Caribbean a few years ago I’ve wanted to do it again, but properly…and legally this time, so it was fortunate that I got chatting with Keith and Vanessa from Santa Pola Dive

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They’d given us a book each to read up on the basic knowledge of open water diving - although mine got a bit soggy when I tried to refer to chapter 3 while we were submerged – and we’d been testing each other on it for the past week or so. We were looking forward to it so much and couldn’t wait to get going but ‘Ness’ was very professional about making sure that we were taking notice of the safety procedures involved and what exactly we would be doing once we were in the water. The plan, apparently, was to bring us back in one piece – which was nice I thought. We’d been at the dive school, on the new port in Santa Pola, for a couple of days previously with Keith and Ness and the attention to detail had been incredible, but reassuring and they’d made sure that we had felt ready to take the plunge too. It felt a bit like learning to drive again, but obviously you don’t need the goggles and flippers…unless my mum is driving. But we were ready to make our first excursion into the sea but, this time (in my case) with the safety net that somebody nearby actually knew what they were doing. With sports such as these it’s so important to have the experts, not only teach you, but also to have them to hand once you have qualified as a resource and an advisor who you can call on. Santa Pola Dive Academy has opened my eyes to not only how dangerous this type of thing can be if done incorrectly but also how simple (and fairly) easy it is to do it properly. Next month we’ll be under the ‘beautiful briny’ and we’ll let you know how we’re getting on. But if you fancy a go yourself give the guys

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1939-2009

It is more than a little sad to record the passing of a great friend and wonderful human being, Brian Conduit, who died on 23rd June after a debilitating illness, in Elche hospital, about which he only had nice things to say. Readers of ‘The Jungle Drums’ will have enjoyed his frequent, well-informed articles and some fine photos. He kept an eye especially on a pair of Bonelli’s Eagles that nest in a nearby sierra, reporting regularly on their progress from the house of his great friends, Jane and Colin A founder member of the Costa Blanca Bird Club, Brian was an excellent ornithologist, quiet and modest about his own abilities, but possessed of a wicked sense of humour that never deserted him. (He used to claim that this quality had its origin in his support for Southampton Football club!) Brian, a lifelong bachelor, retired to Santa Pola after a successful partnership with his brother, Ian, some fifteen years ago, when I had the pleasure of making his acqaintance, subsequently making many trips with him, including a winter visit to the Pyrenees, when we walked into France in a blizzard! Brian will be sorely missed by all members of the club, expert and otherwise – he had a great ability to communicate with those less experienced than he was. I only once saw Brian show his emotions, and that was when he openly wept about the fate of the 29 year-old in the next hospital bed, dying of an incurable disease, despite the fact that he himself was in great pain. It tells you all you need to know about the man. Malcolm Palmer

photo Mark Welton “Brian was one of lifes great blokes”

BRIAN CONDUIT

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GA

Find the new GA Train SUMMER timetable on page 45! N.B. if there are enough people the train may run later...be nice to the driver...!

Where’s the chuffin’ train?!

gran alacant Bancaja Habitat inaugurates

“Summer Nights”

at Santa Pola Life Resort Throughout the summer, the resort will be offering a huge variety of free shows and activities for children, youngsters and grown-ups alike. Bancaja Habitat has inaugurated the “Summer Nights” at Santa Pola Life Resort, a initiative that, throughout the summer, offers a wide variety of free activities and shows for the resort’s residents, as well as all the neighbours of Gran Alacant and its surroundings. These activities include theme nights with dinner and a floor show, live magic shows, concerts, acrobatics, bingo, a puppet theatre or children’s games. There’ll also be plenty to do during the day, as several associations and artists will be organizing activities and performing at the Santa Pola Life Resort, such as the benefit festival organized by the Cancer Association, the first Trade Fair on 4th July, or the antiques exhibition organized by the Gran Alacant Neighbours’ Association in August. Santa Pola Life Resort offers an extensive array of services and amenities for looking after its clients and ensuring their welfare, including: a Medical and Rehabilitation Centre, the Spa & Fitness, a shopping mall, sociocultural amenities, etc. Santa Pola Life Resort sits at the heart of the Costa Blanca, just over 4 miles from Alicante international airport and from the A-7 motorway exit, and less than 7.5 miles from Alicante. Phase one consists of 200 furnished apartments and bungalows, fitted with domotics, medical alarms, smoke detectors, CCTV, and a 24-hour monitoring and security system. There are also extensive gardens and shared recreation areas. It also has a social and leisure centre that offers sociocultural services: restaurants, shops, supermarket, newspaper stands, social club, auditorium, exhibition hall, municipal rooms, etc. Bancaja Habitat, Bancaja’s real estate subsidiary, has consolidated its position in the Valencia Region and has begun expansion to the rest of Spain, leveraging on its extensive knowledge of local markets and real estate product. The national and international real estate development Group implements its business vision centred on a sustainable development model geared towards customer satisfaction. Through its Vida&Resorts business line, it develops, promotes and manages residential centres for the over 55’s, or anyone who needs medical care in terms of preventive, rehabilitation or relaxation treatment.

For further information: Lucía Casanueva/Flor Cid Portocarrero&Asociados Tel. 91 413 74 78 lucia@portocarrero.es / flor@portocarrero.es

DESTINATIONS

Bar & Grill

If it’s not back by the time you read this - it won’t be long. It’s gone for a bit of TLC (service) and guess what? yup...they’re waiting for one little incy bit to get it going... sounds like marriage...

watch out...

MAUREEN’S ABOUT! The end of June saw more money raised for the Elche hospital Oncology Unit when we

held a concert at the Life Resort featuring Cathy Carson, Barbershop singers and of course young Jose, Gran Alacant’s young rapper who, despite the audience wondering what the hell he was on about, was accepted really well by the audience. We managed to raise over 800€ towards the cause so a big well done to all who came and those who participated. The town hall are doing good work with the new play area in avenida Noruega, opposite the new supermarket, and we’ll soon be getting more Petanca areas too so no excuses for not getting out and about. The pavement in the same area is coming along nicely too and the play area outside the municipal centre is almost ready for the little ones with plenty of new stuff to keep the kids busy while mum and dad watch on. I know it’s not the town hall’s fault but I wonder if they can put any pressure on the large building companies that still own large chunks of GA to clean up the areas that are becoming waste tips for people and other builders. If anyone else feels the same perhaps you could get in touch and we’ll see if we can get something done about it. But whatever it is, if you just want me to find something out or you want to highlight a problem send me a mail to ask@thejungledrums.com and I’ll see what I can do about it. Have a nice month y’all, Mo MABS needs you! Gran Alacant cancer support group MABs needs help from volunteers. If you can assist in any way contact the girls: Jan 96 669 7754 or Angie 616 415 239 and find out more. Pictured are the MABS girls (Jan and Angie and of course, me!).

The Rumour Mill The Monte y Mar complex have asked me to point out that we didn’t get it quite right apparently concerning the future the swimming pool area last month. We’ll update you more when we know more…but for now we withdraw the article written last month under the heading ‘Rumour Mill’ But we’ll get it right one day…!

E DOGS!

GA DESIGNER BAG IS TH

Gran Alacant resident and fashion designer Hannele Merik has just launched her latest design onto the market (the multifunctional bag of brand MERÏKH) – JD decided to find out a little more… Creator Hannele Merik explains… ‘The idea of the MERÏKH bag got started when I was walking my dog with the leash in my hand and a lot of other stuff too including, keys, cellphone, wallet etc. The dog was pulling, the things where falling from my hands and suddenly I realised that I had not brought a plastic bag with me to clean up after my dog....., embarrising! I came home and started thinking if there was something I could design to avoid this?’ Hannele moved to Alicante in april 2005, having been born and raised in Stockholm, however her roots are from Finland and Estonia and she has always been creative; knowing as a teenager that she liked the fashion industry. In high school she studied Business and administration and later on studied to be an International purchaser. The idea to start her own accessories line had been in her mind for long time however for some reason it never got further. She continues… ‘this time when I returned from the walk I sat down and found some fabric, cut a pattern out of it and started to sew with my machine, the result was a small duffel bag that you could attach to a leash with two straps and it was great! What a release, always be prepared with a plasticbag roll and treats for your dog in the bag. Also comfortable to go for a long walk without having to carry your personal belongings in your hand or pockets’. MERÏKH, small multifunctional handbag that fits all your personal belongings such as, cellphone, keys and other essential stuff, as well as a roll of plasticbags for your pet. It can be used as a handbag and carried from the attachable chain in your hand or it can be carried in your palm from the handle on the other side of the bag. It can also be attached to a leash, belt or a bag from the two straps that you can set in four different positions or just take them of. The bag is going to be sold in different retail stores in Europe and some also outside of Europe. For the moment you can find the bags in the stores as indicated in the list below, however we are continuosly looking for new retailers. As this is the first design it is only available in black synthetic nappa leather. The retail price during the launch is 55euros, however the original price is 65euros. Hopefully in the near future you will find more colours, models and accesories for men, women and pet. You will find all updates on the webpage: www.merikh.es or if you have questions you can always email to: info@merikh.es Gran Alacant: Dogs Bubbles, The pink pet grooming van Animal ZOO, Avda. Escandinavia 72, Blq 3, local 11 Santa Pola: YUTE, Av. González Vicén, 20 Clinica veterinaria Santa Pola, Poeta Miguel Hernández,

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your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com


Talking of

LaMarina Neighbours – everybody needs good neighbours ! By John McGregor Neighbours, don’t you just love ‘em - No? You

round outside our houses and let myself in their

don’t ? Well, there’s a surprise ! Over the years

gate. To my utter amazement, a chicken passed

I lived in the UK, like most of us I had many

me, nonchalantly pecking away, followed by

neighbours, good, so-so and bloody awful, but I

another, then another. As if that wasn’t enough,

never fell out badly with any of them, to produce

round the far corner of their house strutted a

the ghastly wars you see and read about on TV

huge cockerel, giving me a stern ‘ who the ****

and the press.

are you ? ‘ starey-eyed look. They had somehow

Here ? Well, aqui in sunny La Marina, it’s been a

brought 5 – yes 5 - chickens and the cockerel all

roller-coaster from the start, and that’s because

the way from France in a family saloon, which

my direct neighbours here are not British, I

was not even their own, they had persuaded their

have Spanish, German and French ones, with

friends to bring them ( cute), who stayed the

all the strange traits that go with them. Anyone

night and then returned all the way back the next

remember The Likely Lads ? I loved it, especially

day ! I shouldn’t really have been surprised, as

the episode where Terry is challenged by Bob in

in previous years they had brought 10 tortoises (

the pub to summarise each European country

don’t laugh, the Mum breeds them ! ), a parrot in

in one word….. as in the Germans ? arrogant

a big cage, and a smelly, aggressive little dog, but

! – French ? smelly ! – Italians ? cowardly ! I’m

this year they surpassed even themselves.

not quite that bad, honest, but I do have eyes

We had 6 weeks of the novelty of a cockerel

and ears….I’ll just confide in you then, ok, just

crowing every morning, we took it on the chin

between the two of us… this is not to be repeated

ok, but although nothing was said, we are sure

– ok ?

that the German neighbours the other side were

The first nationality that come to mind are my

distinctly unimpressed, and they moved shortly

French neighbours, who only come out on holiday

after. Their new English replacements were

once a year, usually for about 6 weeks between

‘encouraged ‘ to lend our Gallic neighbours their

July and September. There used to be Mum, Dad

second car to use while they were here ( cute),

and teenage daughter, sadly about 5 years ago

and got it back with no petrol and a flat tyre (

Dad died from illness, but Mum and daughter

cute, or what ?) - they’ve now moved on as well,

have continued to come out from somewhere in

funny that !

the South of France, a long journey here involving

Having said all that, we are still friends, their

an overnight stay. To say they are eccentric,

weird ways continue to astound us - their ‘garden’

unpredictable and ‘cute’is an understatement…I

is a terrifying jungle, packed with many horrible,

will explain ‘ cute’ later.

dangerous cactus plants - you feel at any time

Three summers ago, one hot Sunday afternoon

as if a python or terradactyl might emerge from

in July, my wife and I were having a siesta. My

the undergrowth and do something dastardly to

hearing is poor, but my wife can hear a fly cough

you ! Every year I resist Mum’s generous offer

( polite version ) from 500 yards away, and

to look after the place for her all year( cute ?),

she suddenly sat up and said she could hear a

it’s like a 70’s/retro/cast-offs/junkyard ! She is

cockerel. ‘ Rubbish ! ’, I said dismissively, ‘this

always asking me if I have a spare fridge, like you

is a private housing estate, people don’t keep

do, as she has an underbuild without one. I keep

farmyard animals like that here!’ She-who-must-

declining her generous – cute – offers !

be obeyed shrugged nonchantly - five minutes

Well, July is only just round the corner, wonder

later the doorbell rang. At the door was the

what’s coming this year ? A goat or two, perhaps

daughter of our French neighbours – she smiled

? I wouldn’t put it past them ! My Likely Lads

sweetly and gave me a garlicky kiss, as usual,

one word description for them is….barking !!

and told me that they had just arrived, but, (

Mind you, I didn’t tell you about our German

as usual), their power had been cut off – this

with 4 sockets from us to them until such time as they could get re-connected - see what I mean about ‘cute ‘? I organised it from our side, and put their socket on top of the adjoining wall between us. I went

Anybody know what’s happening down the far bottom corner by the canal, heading for San Fulgencio, where you cross the chicane – sorry, single track bridge ? The big new roads around it are rapidly developing that one-way habit ( no, not your way ! ), and no, I don’t know either ! Shops/bars/restaurants - new Indian restaurant opened near Domti, Mr Lamb’s opposite closed now… Iceland’s not bad ( the shop, not the overdrawn country ! ), not just freezer food, but lot’s more. Is anyone going to take one of those new units down from Chief O’Neills, why are they all still empty after nearly two years ? Wouldn’t be cost then, who got that wrong ? Do you remember ‘ Big Yellow Taxi ’, that 70s record by Joni Mitchell ? Well, there’s a big yellow taxi going round La Marina now, but it’s a special one. The rumour is that it’s to ferry the animals that used to use the massive dog loo in Parque del Mosa to some other worthy spot on the Urb to do their business – hope it’s not the streets again ! If so, that’ll force me to finish my sequel to ‘Driving over Lemons’ about life in La Marina, called appropriately ‘ Squelching through Dogshpoo’. Someone said the vehicle was an animal ambulance, but how do they know to ring 112 ? It’s not been thought through… Parque del Mosa became the huge dog loo two years ago, after the council thoughtfully arranged for thousands of skips of builders rubbish to be dumped there two years ago, raising the landscape by 12 feet and involving regular massive clouds of dust, lorry traffic, loud noise and inconvenience for the residents who live there ( who cares ? ). Broken promises that the dumpers would eventually build a park there ( yes, we still believed in Father Christmas ), instead they just disappeared of course, the parque was then half-heartedly fenced off to allow our four legged friends to relieve themselves under the traditional leisure pursuit described as ‘ taking the dog for a walk ‘- otherwise known as ‘not in my back yard – or front, in fact nowhere on my premises’ ! In Parque del Mosa the bulldozers moved in this week, most residents there havn’t a clue what’s happening to it this time ( why should they, they only live there ? ). Perhaps it’s an extension to the new mini theme park recently opened down on Calle del Bosque – where you ask ? Its actually situated in the most inaccessible spot in the whole of La Marina. Was a poll taken asking ‘ where can you not get to most easily ?’. Calle del Bosque is actually the bottom road of the near vertical slope of Marina del Mar One, carry on down Calle Bilbao past The Hillside till you get below the quarry. In fairness, 4 people who actually live on Calle del Bosque said the new park was handy when the rellies visit, although they didn’t want it on their doorstep all year round !

neighbours, did I ? P’raps next month, eh ?

happened most years, no surprise there, the usual plan was for me to rig up an extension lead

FOUL EYE

Local politics are hotting up, we have a new centre party that

MICK BLAKE

Our thoughts go to the family and friends of Mick who passed away at the end of June – Mick always gave us time to talk to us about local issues. The Jungle Drums

apparently looks neither left or right, and claims to represent US, whoever we are ! Sounds good, like most political parties, but who, where, when ? Will they be allowed to use the La Marina Social Centre, as no-one else can – except the Town Hall of San Fulgencio, of course - they built it, didn’t they ?

23


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CATRAL Alicante money being raised by the 152 inhabitants at the time. The title of 'town' was conferred on Catral by Felipe V and its first president was D Antonio Sirvent. Although affected by the earthquake of 1829, Catral was very fortunate and did not suffer as much damage as many of the neighbouring villages.

CATRAL

located on the CV9218 via a link from the CV-90 near to Dolores in the province of Alicante, Catral at first seems to be a tiny village, but you very soon realise that it is anything but small. One of the many villages of the Vega Baja, Catral Alicante has a population of approximately 6,000 and lies close to Elche's Municipal District. Its original Moorish name was Al-Quatrullat which was given to an irrigation channel leading to Orihuela, and passed close to the village. As in many of the neighbouring villages the population have relied on agriculture as their main source of income throughout the years but is now involved in the footwear industry and the production of picture frames. Its real wealth in agriculture developed after Cardinal Belluga drained the marshes early in the 18th Century and from then onwards with the fertile earth and the mild climate its economy flourished. In 1741 gained its independence from Orihuela by paying 12,499 libras to the crown, the

Leading from the town square where the church and Ayuntamiento are located there are a small parade of shops and bars. Further shops can be found throughout the town, by walking through a maze of quaint streets, past the typical Spanish houses and on the outskirts of town there are more shops, bars and hairdressers. In addition to the main square you will find other areas where it is pleasant to sit watching the world go by whilst enjoying a drink or a coffee, perhaps on the very 'English' village green with a local hostelry nearby. Although a medium to large village, there still remains an air of relaxation without the usual hustle and bustle which accompanies other towns of this size. On the edge of town is the Hondo Reservoir a region providing the opportunity for walking, hiking or cycling along the many rural tracks and trails throughout the area. The Patron Saint of Catral Alicante is Saint Juan (Saint John the Baptist) and his feast day is celebrated on June 24th with carnival float parades and many open-air festivities. The parish church and local Hermitage are dedicated to Saint Agatha and the annual pilgrimage for Saint Agatha is held on the 5th February. The Purisima is celebrated on the 8th December and is traditionally enjoyed by the combination of religious costumes and festivals. One other special tradition in Catral Alicante is the local band whose origins date back to the 19th Century and whose prescence is ensured on every festive occasion. Each Sunday in October the religious singers known as Los Auroros walk the streets of the village singing the Rosario and the Purisima on their way to the Hermitage.

rice, or Cocida con Pelotas which is a stew of minced meat wrapped in cabbage leaves. If on your visit you would like more information about Catral, then visit the local library (biblioteca) which can be found adjacent to the square around the corner from the Ayuntamiento The worst possible Spanish dream With more and more bad press hitting the news about the escalating number of illegal houses built in Spain and with the ongoing saga in Catral still to be sorted out, we thought we’d put together some info’ for anyone worried about buying or having bought in spain. Some of the figures estimated are above 100,000 homes at present classed as being illegal Malaga estimated 50,000 illegal homes Albox estimated 3000+ illegal homes Catral estimated 1200+ illegal homes Remember these figures are all estimated or quoted in the international, national and local press and could run a lot higher. Plus they only cover a small part or certain areas of Spain in general Its not only are villas and fincas at risk of being illegal, but also apartment blocks that have been built on the edge of town boundaries and get classed as being on agricultural land If you are affected by the above, please visit our forum and share you story or discuss your problem visit www.illegalvillasspain.com where you’ll find lots of advice and other peoples’ experiences

Not to be missed on your visit to Catral is the church of San Quan dedicated to Saint Agatha, in the town square on the side of which is a plaque dedicated to the memory of "the sons of Catral who gave their lives for a better future". Also, the Hermitage, again to Saint Agatha is woth seeing together with the impressive Ayuntamiento (Town Hall) and the municipal sports field. When taking a break from the sightseeing, try one of Catral's local dishes, maybe rabbit with

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Welcomes you to enjoy.... All Day Breakfasts/Bar Snacks Welcomes you to enjoy.... Del Dia menu 3 course inc. half litre of wine 7e All Day Breakfasts/Bar Snacks Del Noche menu 3 course inc.ofhalf litre Del Dia menu 3 course inc. half litre wine 7€of winemenu 10e Del Noche 3 course inc. half litre of wine 10€ is Chips Cod &Day Chips Day Friday Friday is Cod & from only from 6€ only 6e Sunday Roast 3 courses 10€ Sunday Roast courses Take Away Menu inc.3 Kebabs, Cod & Chips & Authentic 10e home made Curries from 5€ Al la Carte TakeMenu Away plus MenuDaily inc. Specials Kebabs, Cod & Chips Char grilled Steaks, Ribs, Lamb Shanks etc. & Authentic home made Curries All freshly fromprepared 5e Private Functions / Corporate functions Steaks, Lamb Shanks Indian Char nightgrilled 4 courses 15€ Ribs, p.p 1st Thurs everyetc. month Al la Carte Menu plus Daily Specials All freshly prepared

628 077 007 villageinnlaromana@yahoo.co.uk We are at No.12 Calle Purisima next to Becki’s Deli

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Malvina Books & Cards

See our book review on page 37

La Romana 965 696 656 Open tues-sat 10.00-2.00 malvinabooks@yahoo.co.uk

Bestsellers & Top Titles in Stock Spanish dictionaries, text books & Study aids Cookery, Painting & Craft books

Over 1000 books in our pre read book exchange

Filofax gifts, Cross & Parker Pens & Refills Huge range of cards - for all occasions Gifts & Gift Vouchers

John O’Donnell

Motor Engineer Servicing Repairs Welding Pre ITV

We’re only making plans with Nigel… He may not be Britain’s top coach yet but Nigel Jardine should be if justice is served having taken on the task of giving a group of Jungle Drummers a corporate kick up the backside at the Life Resort theatre last month. Firstly, let me explain in case you couldn’t be arsed to read last month’s article – and if indeed you couldn’t be arsed, Nigel is the man for you, you’ll see why in a bit - Nigel is a motivational speaker and business coach. In other words he helps you make the very best of yourself during your stay on this planet and taking on a large group of Jungle Drum’s readers (says it all, I know…) must have been one of his toughest tests yet a bit like teaching a Haddock too play the banjo, I guess. But anyway, he took on the task and spent the afternoon amusing and educating the assembled group and passing on some, surprisingly obvious, tips on simple ways to make a big improvement on each of our lives. It has to be said that our photographer, Mark, is not the most optimistic person in the world…he once won small amount on the lottery, his response? ‘s’pose I’ll have to pay tax on it…’ but even he was taking the advice given and being optimistic by the end. Next month, walking on water… Nigel is resident in Gran Alacant and offers training either individually or to groups and I, and I’m sure I speak for everyone else who attended his first workshop in the area, would thoroughly recommend him to anyone. If anyone is interested in attending one of Nigel’s workshops in Gran Alacant drop us an email or give us a call and if we get enough responses we’ll set it up. Check out Nigel on www.nigeljardine. com and get some tips from Nigel who is already one of Britain’s top motivational coaches.

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30

your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com


31


THERE IS ONLY ONE NAME IN SANTA POLA

Talleres PEREZ JUAN NEW AND SECOND HAND VEHICLES, REPAIRS, SERVICING AND BODY WORK Talleres Perez Juan S.L Ctra Elche 10 - Santa Pola. Telephone 96 541 5921 or 96 541 3746 32

your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com


Motoring in Spain COMPLETE MOTORING SOLUTIONS

EVERYTHING YOU NEED FOR YOUR CAR IN SPAIN

I am writing this by the side of a swimming pool, I wish! Summer’s here and I have to write about

AIRBAGS Yes, really, recently the ITV Stations have been taking particular notice of Airbag warning lights; if they stay illuminated, after the engine is started, you will have an immediate ITV failure. May be just a loose connection, or a very expensive fix. If you have this problem, we would be happy

E E

ITV’s

E E

VEHICLE RE-REGISTRATION

safety issue and will attract a failure, again

E E

CAR SERVICE CENTER

This month, I have tracked down Paco, who

E E

VEHICLE TRANSFERS

advise you. Also, defective front windows are deemed a perhaps a simple solution, or an expensive replacement, let us advise you.

is still painting road markings for the Council and has now been nicknamed, “Pacosso”, by his mates. “Paco” I ask, “all those lines you are painting, what are they for, and why don’t your countrymen, take any notice of them?”

E E

SPARES & ACCESSORIES

E E

REPAIRS SHINY LAMPS SL

Answers Paco, “Boss says, paint that here, paint that there, he don’t say WHY! So I just paint them, here and there!” “OK, when you are driving, why don’t you

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take any notice of, the solid line in the centre of the road, ‘No Overtaking’, or the

“overtaking, what is

this?” Then, I remembered, Jose doesn’t have a Licence and his transport, is one of those plastic, mechanised prams, called an “Axiothingy”. He never overtakes anything, except maybe, pedestrians, kids on tricycles or the odd donkey; his motoring time is spent straddling the white line, at the edge of the road, keeping out of the way of anybody that can do more than 10mph. Dangerous? How can travelling so slowly, possibly be dangerous!!! We are having lots of enquiries concerning the purchase of UK registered, RHD cars that are here in Spain. Be very careful, the traditional, simple, “Change of Residence” rules will not apply in these circumstances. The vehicle, and its documentation, need to be carefully checked and there will be no avoidance of the Spanish First Registration Tax. If you are considering such a purchase, please ask us for a no-obligation appraisal, before you commit yourself to the deal.

solid line, at a junction, ‘Stop, Giveway”. Much head scratching, “Oh, is that what they mean! I thought the middle one, was to follow on my way home from the Bar, and those at the junction, to tell me that I must

Till next month, safe motoring, don’t forget you can contact us on, Tel : 966 419 769.

decide whether to turn left or right”.

Or e-mail :

At this point, I noticed Jose, bemused, and

mick@completemotoringsolutions.es

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get something answers page 46 on yer mind!

it... use ose or l it!

Across 1. Clam juice 6. Squeegee attachment 10. Eat sideways 14. Chemical found in some emetics 15. Dog wax 16. Goatherd’s undergarment 17. Puzzle’s secret, part one 19. Tiny ear 20. Foam basket 21. Wombat-like ruminant 23. Amateur proctologist’s grp. 25. Slag dross 26. Puzzle’s secret, part two 32. Obsequious exclamation 35. Spleen growth 36. Hungarian flautist Proog 37. Capital of Orlee 39. Bag of doughnuts: Var. 41. Shoe paste 42. Banjo filler 43. Trout vessel 44. Small sneeze 46. Sumatran rat monkey 47. Snide, to a Scot 48. Puzzle’s secret, part three 51. Snail appendage 52. Etruscan tuber 53. Salty wine 58. “On my planet...” 63. Language of ancient Freznia 64. Puzzle’s secret, part four 66. Hairy bristle 67. Swim like an armadillo 68. Shakespearean doofus 69. Crunchy fern 70. Hit with a spoon 71. Eskimo dance

Down 1. Rubber ducky’s place, perhaps 2. Canyon sound 3. Toboggan 4. Place for parking a boat 5. Baseball game division 6. Cat’s coat 7. Animal home 8. Concept 9. Frisbee-shaped Olympics projectile 10. Go on and off, as a traffic light 11. Come back to earth 12. Where Cleveland is 13. Game on horseback 18. Lone Star State 22. Money in the bank, say 24. Tentacled creatures 26. Young ladies 27. Arctic or Indian, e.g. 28. Europe’s “boot” 29. ___ of the above 30. Mr. Philbin of TV 31. Work too hard at (it) 32. Jack Nicholson role in “Batman” 33. Sporting event site 34. Jeans material 38. Breathing organ 40. Top room 45. Like some statistics 49. Sand trap, e.g. 50. Theater lanes 51. Cattle marking 53. Pop 54. Basic impulse 55. Light greenish-blue 56. Locale 57. Jump like a frog 59. Hendrix hairdo 60. Put on weight 61. Hawaiian musicmakers 62. Dracula player Lugosi 65. What candles may signify

Across 1. See 69 across 7. Rapid transit in France 10. Big part 14. Type of maid 15. Color 16. Color 17. Black Sea port 18. Corrode 19. Contented sound 20. Slip 21. Tiger Woods, ethnically 23. Like a hideaway 25. Serpentine sound 28. Carpet type 29. Comfort 34. This little piggy, et al 36. Author Blyton 38. Spoons and spinners 39. Vehicle for 69 across 42. Paint ingredient 43. Dam’s opposite 44. Unilever deodorant brand 45. Wears 47. Intangible quality 49. Frank McCourt memoir 50. Applicable 53. Tanner’s concern 57. Auto style 61. Libra’s birthstone 62. Richard haunted by Anne’s ghost 63. Jointed at right angles 64. Attend 65. Name for a famous rag doll 66. Anxiety 67. Was aware 68. 60s psychedelic 69. With 1 across, name for this puzzle

MORE STRANGE STUFF... A Crocodiles tongue is attached to the roof of its mouth. A group of larks is called an exaltation. A elephant is the heavest of all land mammals at around 8,000 pounds. A kangaroo can’t jump unless its tail is touching the ground. A male emperor moth can smell a female emperor moth up to 7 miles away. A man had the hiccups for 69 years. A millipede has 4 legs on each segment of it’s body.

34

Down 1. Scary stuff in a B-movie 2. Hitchhiker’s quest 3. Swear 4. Egg holders 5. China 6. __ roll 7. Vehicle for 69 across 8. Protect 9. Disallows 10. Only seated people have them 11. Distant start 12. Halo, e.g. 13. Shucks 21. Davis and Stewart 22. German name now out of favor 24. Munch 25. Did a bank job 26. Detective device 27. Spat 30. Bear in Bordeaux 31. Vonnegut’s Kilgore 32. __ Matisse 33. __ Park, Colorado 35. Lose fur 37. Get by reasoning 40. Wield 41. Singer McEntire 46. Consecutive 48. California live oak 51. Gird one’s __ 52. Carrier 53. Punch 54. Informed 55. Identify 56. Seattle __, Triple Crown winner 58. Caspian Sea feeder 59. 100 centavos 60. First nudist colony 63. Speechless


Wordoku (or word sudoku) is much like traditional

. e

Sudoku, except that here you must place letters from a given 9 letter word into each of the blank spaces. Every row of the puzzle must contain one of each letter in the

work it out.. !

word, as must every column and every 3x3 square.

Fred stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?

Key word is SOMETHING

Unscramble the words to find a female & a male celebrity

IEILCDENON YE OLJNA Answers Fred was so sick and tired of window washing, he opened the window and jumped inside. Celine Dion & Jay Leno

Dinosaurs Find and circle all of the Dino’s

Roman Cities

that are hidden in the grid.

Towns & Cities of Roman Britain - Common Names

TRICERATOPS PACHYCEPHALOSAURUS STEGOSAURUS BRACHIOSAURUS APATOSAURUS ALLOSAURUS TYRANNOSAURUS PTERANODON PARASAUROLOPHUS STYRACOSAURUS ANKYLOSAURUS DEIONYCHUS PLESIOSAURUS

ALCESTER

EXETER

BATH

GLOUCESTER

CAERLEON

LEICESTER

CAERNARFON

LONDON

CAERWENT

LINCOLN

CANTERBURY

MANCHESTER

CARMARTHEN

NEWCASTLE UPON TYNE

COLCHESTER

NORTHWICH

CORBRIDGE

ST ALBANS

CHICHESTER

TOWCESTER

CHESTER

WHITCHURCH

CIRENCESTER

WINCHESTER YORK

DOVER DORCHESTER

your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com

35


LIFE IS TOO SHORT....so if you fancy doing something different.. just do it!

LivingLIF

OUR MAN IN MADRID After a lot of calls and letters on various subjects we decided that this month we’d have a little chat with ‘our man in Madrid’ (he didn’t even have a bowler hat…) about what to do if things go wrong over here, especially for those just visiting or on a summer break. HEALTHCARE The rules for getting state healthcare in Spain are different from those in the UK. The NHS is a residence-based system, which means that all you need to access healthcare in Great Britain is to be ‘ordinarily resident’ (see Returning to the UK). In Spain however, the system is contribution-based, which means that normally you must have paid into the social security system in order for you and your dependants to get state healthcare. These social security contributions can be paid by your employer or by yourself as a self-employed worker. You may also be eligible to register to pay voluntary contributions if you have paid contributions for 3 out of the last 12 years in any European Union Member State – apply at your local Tesoreria. If you are not paying into the Spanish social security system you may also get state healthcare if: * You are in receipt of a UK state pension, long-term contribution-based Incapacity benefit or Bereavement benefit (apply for an E121 form); * You are an early retiree to Spain and have been resident here less than two years (apply for an E106 form); * You are a posted worker for a UK company; * You

36

are a dependant of someone who falls into one of the categories above; * You spend less than 3 months of the year in Spain (6 months if you are a UK State Pensioner) and have a valid UK European Health Insurance Card (EHIC); * You will be receiving planned treatment abroad or are in receipt of UK sickness or maternity benefit (apply for an E112 form). For more information, please visit the NHS website * You are a child under the age of 18 and have no access to healthcare through your own or your parent’s means. This is called ‘La Ley de Minor’ and you apply through the social worker at your local health centre. Please remember - if you do register with the state health system in Spain, it is important to de-register with your GP in the UK. Likewise, if you decide to return to the UK, then you must deregister with the Spanish authorities. IF YOU NEED A DOCTOR If you require assistance immediately, dial 112 and ask for an ambulance. If you are a visitor to Spain, you may present your European Health Insurance Card (EHIC: for more information please visit the Department of Health website) to gain access to emergency health care at a Social Security Hospital. Private hospitals will not accept the EHIC, and will ask you to pay for your treatment or provide adequate insurance. If you are resident in Spain, you can use your Health Card (tarjeta sanitaria) to gain access to full health care at Social Security hospitals. If you are not eligible for a Social Security Health Card, you must ensure you have adequate private insurance. If you have suffered a serious accident or injury, and friends/ relatives are unavailable, a Consular office can contact the hospital within 24 hours of being notified, ask the Foreign and Commonwealth Office in London to contact your next-of-kin, and if necessary visit you within two days if the hospital is in

Madrid. IF YOU ARE A VICTIM OF CRIME What we can do to help We can give general information about local police and legal procedures. We can’t give you legal advice, but can put you in touch with a local lawyer. If you need medical treatment, we can help you to contact a local doctor. Contacting friends and relatives If you want us to, we can contact your relatives and friends and let them know what has happened. In some cases, we can offer financial assistance. We cannot collect evidence or investigate crimes ourselves, and in many countries investigating authorities and the courts will refuse to answer enquiries from other people and organisations, including our staff. Local lawyer So, you should consider appointing a local lawyer who can look after your interests in court, and follow any trial for you. We can give you a list of local English-speaking lawyers. We would not ordinarily attend a court case involving a British national and cannot influence the outcome of any trial. Back in the UK, you may feel you would benefit from extra support to help you cope with the effects of the crime. Organisations such as Victim Support can help. Contact details British Consul: Juliet Maric British Vice Consul: Lloyd Milen Plaza de Calvo Sotelo, 1, 2º Apdo. de Correos 564 03001 Alicante See our location in Google maps Tel: (+34) 96 521 60 22 Fax: (+34) 96 514 05 28 E-mail: Alicante.Consulate@fco.gov.uk Opening hours We are open to the public Monday to Friday from 08.30 to 13.30, excluding public holidays. Out of hours emergency assistance Out of office hours the Consulate telephone number (+34) 96 521 61 90/ 96 521 60 22 provides details on how to proceed in case of an emergency and to contact a duty officer if needed.

your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com


FE

SCHOOL S OUT

Kids in Spain

The dates for the new school year were released last Wednesday. The summer holiday looks to be longer than ever, as primary schools go back on September 14th, and secondary schools returning to classes on September 16th. The 2009-2010 school year will finish on June 23rd in primary schools and 25th in secondary schools. Schools in Murcia are obliged to teach a

Suzanne Lockwood

minimum of 181 days each year. Christmas holidays have been set for December 23rd to January 6th, and Easter March 29th to April 5th 2010.

READ! READ! READ!

Other holidays include October 12th, December 7th, December 8th, March 19th, May 1st, June 9th (Murcia only). The schools also have 3 inset training days to add to these holidays.

Books are the source of most of the new words that

they look, children learn to read fluently within three

your children and point out these different spelling

children learn once they are in school. Of course,

months. In the UK, academics have found that it

patterns as they arise.

children learn new words from television and through

takes three years for a child to acquire a basic level

conversation, but the research shows that the majority

of competence. Tricky spellings make English

For those children who find it hard to master the

of new vocabulary and unfamiliar spelling patterns

particularly difficult for children with dyslexia and

principles of decoding (sounding out words, letter

comes from books.

those from disadvantaged families, who are less likely

combinations), early intervention is important, it

Getting off to an early start in reading helps children

to be read to regularly by their parents.

is also important to consider that a more serious learning difficulty may be the problem.

quickly pick up the skills they need to expand their There are words which have the same pronunciation

knowledge, vocabulary and spelling. The English written language is sometimes ‘phonically unreliable’, It has been argued by the spelling society that there are at least 200 words on the spelling lists

but different letter combinations. Examples include to

There are more and more books with high interest

and two and too; clean and gene; same and aim; day

and lower demands on independent reading skills

and grey; kite and light; and stole and coal.

which are very helpful for providing practice and developing confidence in reading and spelling. The

that could be improved by simply dropping ‘surplus

Then there are those that look alike but sound

longer a child is left struggling the harder it is to

letters’ such as the ‘i’ in friend or the ‘u’ in shoulder, to

different with the combinations of ‘ea’, ‘ee’ and the

improve their reading and spelling skills.

name but a few.

letter ‘o’ causing most trouble. Among others, some

The English language system is unique in that there are not just spelling problems but reading problems too. They do not exist anywhere else in the world.’ Studies show that in other European countries, where words are more likely to be pronounced as

Guernica by Dave Boling

words falling into these categories are eight and

Suzanne Lockwood

height, break and dreamt, and move and post. The

Email soemg@hotmail.co.uk

letters ‘ough’ can also be pronounced in a number of

Foundation Degree, NNEB, TEFL, NVQ3

different ways. For these reasons it is most important to read with

This book presents an extraordinary epic of love,

bombing of Guernica. Despite a slight tendency to

family, and war set in the Basque town of Guernica

over romanticise the Pays-Basque, it is a powerful

before, during, and after its destruction by the

and moving story that enables us to empathise

German Luftwaffe during the Spanish Civil War.

with the innocent victims of war in an humane but

In 1935, Miguel Navarro finds himself in conflict with the Spanish Civil Guard and flees the Basque fishing

unsentimental way. The characters and events are so well described that

village of Lekeitio to make a new start in Guernica,

they come to life and you feel like you are living the

the centre of Basque culture and tradition. Once there,

lives and events that unfold. Hard to put down it takes

he finds more than just a new life - he finds someone

you through happy times, into darkness, sadness and

to live for. Miren Ansotegui is the charismatic and

on to hope.

graceful dancer he meets and the two discover a love

Highly recommended.

they believe nothing can destroy ...Rich in the history of the region, the Red Baron, the Luftwaffe and even Picasso make appearances in Guernica as the fate of the Navarro family is traced through the early decades of the twentieth century. This is a remarkable first novel. Boling creates a convincing portrayal of Basque life and some credible characters whose lives are destroyed by the infamous

‘A heart-rending yet life-affirming story’ - “Daily Mail”.

BOOK OF THE MONTH AT MALVINA BOOKS, LA ROMANA 965 696 656 OUR PRICE ONLY 5.00€ Limited stock available

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38


YOUR STARS

Aries

Leo

Sagittarius

With Venus in retrograde, take this opportunity to temper your typically arrogant SoB Ariean attitude. In Roman times, Emperors employed minions to walk at their side telling them: “Remember you are mortal.” Employ a server from your local Dunkin Donuts to provide this service for you this month: pay $2 above the minimum wage for this part time, evening only, position. Your optimal meditation color this month is purple with yellow stars, and your chant sound is “ppppptttfffft” (using pursed lips).

This month a tennis match and a bowl of strawberries should not be used as an excuse to put off an important decision. Split up a half finished book of Post-It notes and use them to construct a timeline of your life’s achievements to date. Now that the Summer solstice has passed (on 21st June) you are 50% more likely than usual to invent a new world religion and construct a hypothesis for water purification for the third world. Publish your findings and arrange for your accountant to find the best tax efficient means of holding any money you get from this in an offshore bank account, Venus suggests Bermuda, Saturn prefers Uzbekistan.

A well meaning, but completely inappropriate, Plutonian interference is to blame for a seemingly accidental meeting with a man who had at one point in his life lost everything, but then found it all again in Tibet. Mercilessly pummel this forgetful person for philosophical thoughts for a book that you intend to write in your retirement. WARNING: DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES TELL HIM WHERE YOU LIVE. This month your favored meditation color will be orange, and the chant sound will be not dissimilar to ‘Uhhmmmmm - aaaaah!’.

Mar 20 - Apr 19

July 23rd - August 23rd

Taurus Apr 20 - May 19

November 23rd - December 21st

Capricorn

December 22nd - January 20th

Thoughts, which can only really be described as Kamikaze in nature, are predictably badly starred this month, especially after the 8th. Avoid oriental cuisine 5 days either side of this date, but, if this is unavoidable, try not to sit near an open window. Jupiter’s transgressions on a Neptunian trajectory, suggests avoiding hoppy-type animals, especially ones with pouches to hold their young. Do not return calls from a person called Skippy until late into November. You have picked up an annoying, Saturn influenced, habit when shopping for vegetables in which you tut slightly while you do that squeezing thing experienced vegetable purchasers do to check the firmness of the produce. Avoid eye contact with shop owners until well after the purchases have been paid for.

Gemini

Virgo

Aug 23 - Sept 21

Frankincense and tinned beans in a tomato sauce are two substances which are set to make this month a much more livelier one than of late. Jupiter has cast its proverbial net over the imaginary tropic of Malaysia with the result that any attempts to make your TV remote work without massaging the batteries first is doomed to failure. Someone with your name will be excommunicated in Rome this month. Do not let this put you off going to church on Sunday, although perhaps it is best to take your passport with you to back up any questions with which you may be faced.

Libra

May 22nd - June 21st

September 23rd - October 23rd

You will aggressively overtake a circus dwarf whilst he is taking his driving test this month. This will anger the dwarf so much that when you inevitably attend one of his performances, around the 16th, he will mercilessly harangue you until you cry. Take two boxes of tissue and a small blanket to avoid the media when you leave the performance. Your meditation color this month is browny yellow. Your preferred chant sound will be the sound with no name. This month our security experts advise issuing you with a cushion advisory which is in force for the whole month.

The Summer Solstice in the northern Hemisphere has triggered a rare parallel duality which may present itself to you in the form of a neighbor who claims to be able to travel through time. Listen to your neighbor’s meanderings for no more than 7 minutes tops before claiming there is something in the oven you must urgently attend to. Your neighbor will recognize this as the international time traveler’s sign of ‘10-4 over and out’ and will completely understand your speedy exit.

Scorpio

October 24th - November 22nd

Cancer

June 22nd - July 22nd A prehistoric find will adversely impact on your well being this month when it appears that a picture of your dog was carved in a newly discovered Red Indian cave 14,000 years ago (yes it is him, his name is written underneath). Resist the temptation to call the media, they will track you down in due course, use this lead time to find a hiding place. Your favored proverb this month will be: ‘Many hands make light work’. This month’s preferred meditation position and sound is that of the surprised, constipated, goat.

A not much happening month - spend as much of your time as possible on the beach with a bucket and spade. Mercury’s flagellation of Neptune’s under region presents an interesting life changing possibility on the 8th. Inflatable sex dolls are well starred, in particular sheep or human forms. Resist your initial impulse of propriety only so that it increases the erotica at a later time. A conjunction on the cusp of Pluto has many likely rational explanations, do not immediately assume you are part of an international conspiracy despite very clear signals that this is the case. A cuddly toy has gone missing in a Toy Story type incident your kind will never understand.

On reading the early chapters of the new Harry Potter book out on 21st July you will be shocked to realize how much your life mimics that of the character Dumbledore. Get to page 113 and stop reading for the rest of the month to be on the safe-side. A homosexual will give you a piece of advice that you will later rely on to place a large, successful, bet with a heavily set thug from the docks. This month your best meditation technique will be to sit quietly, cross legged, on a meditation mat. Your favored sound will involve the word “icky”.

Aquarius

January 21st - February 18th As a verbose Aquarian, you can sometimes come across, accidentally, as a consummately persuasive person. Use this valuable talent for negotiations involving a land deal with simple folk. Itemize all of your expenses this month in a small blue book which you should keep safely and secured from flood and fire, but not pestilence. In a freak professional wrestling inspired planetary confluence, your favored wrestling move will be a ‘forearm smash’ and not your usual ‘flying grapevine from off the top rope’. This month’s optimal meditation color is flaming pink, and your chant sound is “oooooh look at her...”

Pisces

February 19th - March 20th This month dream premonitions are likely to be more accurate than ever as Mars is ingratiated with Neptune in a moment of cautious nocturnal bondage. Allow these dream messages to determine every single one of your decisions this month. Sometimes dreams can be rationalized literally, other times symbolically. Choose which is which by flipping a coin - Heads is literally, tails symbolically, but only until the 16th. After this time this advice should be reversed (apart from a brief moment on the 18th when it should be reversed back again before dusk).

jULy 2009

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40


WHAT’S ON ? GUIDE FIESTAS

Moros y Cristianos 7 de Julio, Benitatxell

Santa María Magdalena 22 de Julio, Benitatxell

Fiestas del Carmen 2009 Tabarca del 15 al 16 de Julio, Alicante

Sta. María Magdalena 22 de Julio, L’Orxa

Sant Bonaventura 15 de Julio, Pedreguer Fiestas de Moraira 15 de Julio, Teulada-Moraira

Fiestas de Tibi 22 de Julio, Tibi Santa Marta y San Jaime, El Desembarco 25 de Julio, Villajoyosa

NEW CATAMARAN TRIPS TO TABARCA FROM GUARDAMAR From the 4 July until the 15 September there will be a new service to the island of Tabarca operating from the Port in Guardamar. ‘Tabarca Kat’ will be operating the new service from the quayside mooring A1 at the mouth of the River Segura and the service will run from Mondays to Sundays with departure times from Guardamar as follows – 9.30 a.m., 11 a.m., 12.30 p.m., 2 p.m., 5 p.m. and 6.30 p.m. Departures and returns from Tabarca will be – 10 a.m., 11.30 a.m., 1 p.m., 4.30 p.m., 5.30 p.m. – with the last departure from the island at 7.15 pm

San Jaime, Santa Ana y el Santísimo Cristo 26 de Julio, Benimarfull Fiestas de Torrellano 26 de Julio, Elche Santos de la Piedra,San Abdón y Senén del 28 al 30 de Julio, Almoradí Santos Abdón y Senén del 28 al 30 de Julio, Algueña

Virgen del Carmen 16 de Julio, Cox

Fiestas de San Jaime y Santa Ana 25 de Julio, Altea

Virgen del Carmen 16 de Julio, Algorfa

San Jaime 25 de Julio, Benidorm

Aniversario de la Segregación 30 de Julio, Los Montesinos

Virgen del Carmen 16 de Julio, Altea

Santiago Apóstol 25 de Julio, Benijófar

Virgen de las Nieves 5 de Agosto, Aspe

Virgen del Carmen 16 de Julio, El Campello

Sant Jaume 25 de Julio, Callosa d’en Sarria

Nuestra Señora del Remedio 5 de Agosto, Alicante

Fireta de Sant Jaume 25 de Julio, El Campello

Virgen de las Nieves 5 de Agosto, Calpe

Sant Jaume 25 de Julio, Guardamar del Segura

Virgen de las Nieves 5 de Agosto, El Fondó de les Neus

Santiago Apóstol 25 de Julio, La Vall de Laguar

Virgen del Remedio 5 de Agosto, Pinoso

Fiestas de Matola 16 de Julio, Elche Virgen del Carmen 16 de Julio, Jávea Fogueres 16 de Julio, Sant Vicent del Raspeig Moros y Cristianos 17 de Julio, Orihuela Santa Justa y Rufina 19 de Julio, Agost Santa María Magdalena 22 de Julio, Novelda

Santiago y Santa Ana del 25 al 26 de Julio, Ondara Fiestas de Santa Ana y Sant Jaume del 25 al 26 de Julio, Onil

Moto fiestas en España July’s fiestas 4-5th Ronda-Malaga meet at the Nuevo Recinto Ferial 10.00 €25 tel. 617 273 036 4-5th Martos-Jaēn meet at the avda de la Fonja €15 tel. 620 921 246

Divino Salvador 6 de Agosto, Els Poblets Santo Cristo 6 de Agosto, Gata de Gorgos

PUBLIC HOLIDAYS July 25th Saint-James Galicia, Navarra, Basque Country

10-12th Cobisa-Toledo meet at the Recinto Ferial de Cobisa 18.00 €20 tel. 610 541 128 rides on sat & sun, Sat night live music with Makrodisco

La Rioja

16-19 Faro, Portugal for more information go to www.motoclubefaro.pt this is the biggest meet in Europe, with upwards of 5,000 bikes mainly custom, there is camping on site with medical, café’s, restaurants, stands, stage and competitions. Groups this year are :- Europe, Children of the Dammed, Hora Zulu, David Fonesca, Tara Perdida, Loquillo y Trogloditas, St Dominie’s gospel choir & Fatal Smile

August 5th

July 28th Institutions Day Cantabria Our Lady of the Snows La Palma (Canary I.)

August 15th Assumption Spain

Prices for the return trip are 13€ for adults and 9€ for children aged 5 – 9 years. Children under 5 travel free. The new initiative will eventually be providing a lunchtime menu of typical ‘caldero’ fish casserole followed by fish paella made from the broth of the same dish, whilst the boat is moored on the island. The company also hope to offer night time visits to the high sea fish factories of Guardamar between 8 p.m. – 11 p.m. which will also include views of the coastline, a complementary drink, with bar service and ‘tapas’ on board. For more information on this new service, please contact Tomás Parodí on 608 96 22 66 or pick up a leaflet from Guardamar’s Tourist Information Office in Plaça de la Constitució Tel. 96 572 44 88

GUARDAMAR ALTERS ITS TRAIN TIMES

Summer has arrived in Guardamar – and train times for the town’s Path of History Tour change to evening departures as of 15 June. The soaring temperatures during the day make this enjoyable and informative Tour a real challenge in the midday sun. As the Tourist Office explained ‘ The Path of History’ is a 2 hour long journey into Guardamar’s fascinating past where we visit all of the important sites of the town, giving a detailed commentary as we move from place to place. There is also a bit of walking involved in the journey – most of which is made by the town’s tourist train – so comfortable shoes, a sunscreen, hat and water are all highly recommended’ Potential passengers are asked to book in advance to aid seating arrangements and groups of passengers (of 25 or more) are able to travel at a reduced rate. For more information on Guardamar’s Path of History Tour, please call the Tourist Information Office in Plaça de la Constitució (town centre). You can also ring them on 96 572 44 88 or e mail turisme2@guardamar.net

MARKETS AND LOTS OF ‘EM MONDAY

Agres, Callosa d’en Sarrià, Cox, Dènia, Elche, Formentera, Granja de Rocamora, Ibi, La Nucia, Monovar, Penáguila, Petrer, San Pedro del Pinatar, Santa Pola, Sax

TUESDAY Altea, Aspe, Beniarbeig, Benijofar, Campo de Mirra, Castalla, Elda, Jalón, Orihuela, Relleu, Sella, San Fulgencio, Tibi

WEDNESDAY

Albatera, Alcoy, Alqueries, Bañeres, Benejamar, Beniarrés, Benidorm, Benilloba, Benitachell, Biar, Callosa sel Segura, El Campello, Elda,

Guardamar, Monforte del Cid, Muchamiel, Ondara, Novelda, Orba, Petrer, Polop, San Miguel de Salinas, Sella, Teulada

THURSDAY Agres, Agost, Alpe, Albatera, Algeña, Alicante, Benidoleig, Cocentaina, Hondon de los Frailes, Gran Alacant Jávea, Jijona, Pego, Rojales, Villajoyosa, Villena,

FRIDAY

Albatera, Bañeres, Benejuzar, Beniarrés, Benidoleig, Crevillente, Dènia, El Pilar de la Horadada, Finestrat, Gata, Granja de Rocamora, L’Alfas del Pi, Moraira, Monforte del Cid, Montesinos, Muro de Alcoy, Onil,

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Petrer, Rafal, Sella, Tibi, Torrevieja, Vergel

SATURDAY Alcoy, Alicante, Almoradi, Alquerias, Benissa, Bañeres, Calpe, Callosa d’en Sar, Castalla, Catral, Castell de Caste Elche, Elda, Gaianes, Hondon de las La Romana, Novelda, Pedreguer, Playa Flemenca, Relleu, Salinas, Santa Pola, San Vicente

SUNDAY

Aigües de Busot, Algueña, Alfafara, Benidorm, Busot, Benferri, Elche, Guardamar, La Marina La Murada, Torremanzana

41


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BUSINESS DIRECTORY AIR CONDITIONING DIGINOVA Santa Pola Tel 660 631 380 MAYO Gran Alacant Tel 665 063 228 REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel 670 260 684

All Areas Tel. 638 461 690 PERFORMANCE & DIESEL Guardamar Tel. 96 610 7606

RENAULT Santa Pola

LEZSONJA’S BOARDING KENNELS Sax, Tel 96 112 0244 ALBERGUE Bacarot Tel 96 596 0224

ESTATE AGENTS Tel 96 541 3746

CAR TRANSFERS CAR SERVICE CENTRE La Marina Tel. 650 821 082 RE-REGISTRATION SPECIALISTS La Marina Tel. 650 821 082 HEADLAMP EXCHANGE La Marina Tel. 96 610 8938

BARS FRANK’S MUSIC BAR Gran Alacant Tel. 637 355 570 PHOENIX BAR Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 8364 SUNSET BAR Gran Alacant Tel. 664 277 986 TOSCANA Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 9957 VILLAGE INN La Romana Tel. 628 077 007

CLEANING SANTA POLA RENTALS Santa Pola Tel: 96 541 6171 MONTE MAR BOWLS CLUB Gran Alacant Tel: 96 669 8676

BOOKS

ANDREA BURNS Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 7824 JLCA LAWYERS Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 8796

BRITISH DENTAL PRACTICE La Marina Tel 96 679 6603 FRANCESC AGULLO Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 5031

BRITISH DENTAL PRACTICE La Marina Tel 96 679 6603 DENTURES DIRECT Gran alacant Tel. 619 185 122

HEARING CENTRAL OPTICA Gran Alacant Tel: 966 698 802

DIVING SANTA POLA DIVE ACADEMY Santa Pola Tel. 677 670 468

XTRA RENT A CAR Santa Pola Tel 607 850 664

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DOCTORS

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Tel 665 063 228

CLINICA GRAN ALACANT Gran Alacant Tel: 96 669 7411 EMERGENCY Tel 608 666 455 OLIVER PACK Santa Pola Tel. 96 541 3364

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DOMESTIC APPLIANCES

Tel 609 755 237

EURONICS Gran Alacant

CAR PARKING STEWART AIRPORT SERVICE Gran Alacant Tel. 636 297 896

DIGINOVA Santa Pola Tel: 660 631 380 REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel 670 260 684

HOUSEHOLD SERVICES MOZISTOP All Areas

Tel. 96 669 5365

ELECTRICIANS/ELECTRONIC

RENAULT Santa Pola Tel 96 541 3746 JOHN O’DONNELL

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LOCKSMITHS SAFEGUARD LOCKSMITHS All Areas Covered 965888681 or 626891453

SUNSHINE MOBILITY Benejuzar Tel. 96 677 7985

MOTORBIKES SOLO MOTOS Santa Pola Tel. 96 541 4242

MORTGAGES JLCA LAWYERS Gran Alacant Tel: 966 698 796

NATURE BRIAN CONDUIT Santa Pola Tel 96 669 0497

OPTICIANS CENTRAL OPTICA Gran Alacant Tel 966 698 802 SPECSAVERS Torrevieja Tel. 96 692 7249

OSTEOPATH CLINICA GRAN ALACANT Gran Alacant Tel 667 919 277

Tel. 659 259 319

INSURANCE ROWLAND INSURANCE Santa Pola Tel 96 541 3076 ALMARCHA INSURANCE La Marina Tel. 96 572 9747

CCW ELECTRICAL Gran Alacant Tel 617 872 405 DIGINOVA Santa Pola Tel 660 631 380 REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel: 670 260 684

CAR REPAIRS

LEZSONJA’S BOARDING KENNELS Sax, Tel 965 475 463

MOBILITY

HEALTH & BEAUTY

DENTAL

CAR HIRE

ANDREA BURNS Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 7824 MICHELLE Gran Alacant Tel 669 791 201

FRANCESC AGULLO Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 5031

CONVEYANCING

ALTOMAR Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 9353 CLIVE COOMBER Gran Alacant Tel 669 593 212 MAYO Gran Alacant Tel 665 063 228 REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel: 670 260 684 RAY CROSS Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 5087

FISCAL

HAIRDRESSERS

BLUE MOON SOLUTIONS All Areas Tel. 655 044 970

KENNELS

FARMACIAS FARMACIA GRAN ALACANT Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 7471

SECOND HAND FURNITURE La Marina Tel. 96 644 3370

COMPUTERS

BUILDING / MAINTENANCE

GA PROPERTY NEEDS Gran Alacant Tel. 627 711 155 TOP ALACANT Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 7357

FURNITURE

CLUBS / SOCIETIES

LA MARINA ANIMAL WELFARE La Marina Tel 96 679 5593 MALVINA BOOKS La Romana Tel. 96 569 6656

How’dyado?

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from page 40-41

FLAMENCO - LOS LUNARES Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 5399 PRO-ACTS All Areas Tel. 96 679 5058

CAR SALES

ANIMAL RESCUE

D JOINER Gran Alacant MAYO Gran Alacant REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant

ENTERTAINMENT

CAR REPAIRS continued

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SPRING: The hidden sentence is: APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY

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your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com


PHYSIOTHERAPY

CLINICA GRAN ALACANT Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 7411

POSTAL OFFEX All Areas

PLUMBERS

SWIMMING POOL (MAINTAINANCE)

GA Pools Gran Alacant PJ’s Gran Alacant

Tel 628 030 184 Tel 619 501 657

SWIMMING POOL (CONSTRUCTION)

Tel. 96 672 0959

REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel 670 260 684

PROPERTY MANAGEMENT KISMET All Areas Tel. 636 946 472 SANTA POLA RENTALS Santa Pola Tel 96 541 6171

REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel 670 260 684

TAX ADVICE ANDREA BURNS Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 7824 JLCA LAWYERS Gran Alacant Tel: 966 698 796

TRANSLATORS

REMOVALS HELEN’S TRUCKS All Areas Tel. 96 540 0616 MISTER VAN All Areas Tel. 697 775 588

RESTAURANTS COCOA’S Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 8509 LOS LUNARES Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 5399 MARCO POLO Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 5408 PHOENIX BAR Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 8364 RINCON MONTE MAR Gran Alacant Tel. 96 669 7483 TASTE OF HOME Pinoso Tel. 96 547 8484 SAFFRON Gran Alcant Tel. 96 669 8098

SIGNS / SIGN WRITING CORTES SIGNS Santa Pola Tel. 686 464 076

SOLICITORS JLCA LAWYERS Gran Alacant Tel: 966 698 796

SUNBLINDS

ANDREA BURNS Gran Alacant Tel 96 669 7824 JOHN TRANSLATOR Gran Alacant Tel. 677 876 371 MICHELLE Gran Alacant Tel 669 791 201

TRANSPORT TAXI Santa Pola

Tel 609 959 408

TRAVEL AGENTS

GETAWAY TOURS Santa Pola Tel. 96 669 6269

TV DIGINOVA Santa Pola SIMULSAT Santa Pola SOLARSKY All Areas

Tel 660 631 380 Tel. 677 878 210 Tel. 96 843 2132

VETS CLINICA VETERINARIA Santa Pola Tel 96 669 8463

WATER FILTERS

TOLDOS PENALVER Santa Pola Tel. 96 543 2350 AJ’S

PUREFLO Gran Alacant

112

TRAM SUMMER TIMETABLE

VISA & MASTERCARD SPAIN: 915 192 100 HEALTH Elche Hospital 96 667 9000 Alicante Hospital 96 593 8300 96 524 4200 Hospital Vega Baja 96 677 6187 96 677 6183 96 677 6166 Torrevieja 965721000 WELFARE Gran Alacant office 96 669 7749 Fire Service 085 Local Police 092 LEISURE La Marina Aqua Park 96 679 7792 La Marina Library 96 679 4201 Guardamar Museum 96 572 8610 Rojales Museum 96 671 3273 SERVICES British Consulate Alicante 96 521 6022 Butano gas 96 541 3473 Consumer Advice 96 373 7109 Electricity company 90 120 2020 Post Office 90 219 7197 Telefonica Information 1004 Water Company 96 541 4124 TRAVEL & TRANSPORT Alicante Airport 96 691 9000 Alicante Bus Station 96 513 0700 RENFE (trains) info 90 224 0202 Elche Bus Station 96 545 5050 Road Information 90 012 3505 Radio Taxis 90 240 4095 British Airways 90 211 1333 Iberia

96 691 9188

Tel. 656 649 221

SHOPPING CENTRE - on the hour Avda Mediterraneo (hill)

- 5 mins past

POST OFFICE - 10 mins past

12 6 12 6 12 6

LiFE RESORT

12

- 15 mins past

6

Don Pueblo

MARCO POLO

12

JLCA & AS - Lawyers

- 25 mins past HEALTH CENTRE

6 12

& LIBRARY

- 30 mins past PHARMACY

6 12

Mon – Sun 10.00 am – 2 pm & 5 pm – 01.00 am

CLINICA VETERINARIA Santa Pola Tel 96 669 2328 LEZSONJA’S BOARDING KENNELS Sax Tel 96 547 5463

EMERGENCIES

& MARKET

- 35 mins past

6

BEACH (Avda Carabassi) - 40 mins past

12

PHOENIX RESTAURANT (Costa Hispana complex)

12

- 45 mins past SCHOOL - 50 mins past MASA COMPLEX (roundabout)

- 55 mins past

SWIMMING POOL (CONSTRUCTION)

professional treatment for low back and leg pain, neck and shoulder pain, arthritis, arthrosis, sport injuries - overuse and work strain Rosa Martinez Valdivieso fully licensed Physiotherapist and Osteopath happy to receive you all year round

6

6 12 6

SUMMER TIMETABLE

PETS

SUPERMARKETS Hondon Nieves Tel. 96 548 0718 BH STORES Catral Tel. 96 678 7891 QUICKSAVE Albatera Tel. 677 524 004

!

MAYO Gran Alacant Tel 665 063 228 REFORMNOVA Gran Alacant Tel 670 260 684

W E

PAINTERS / DECORATORS

N

BUSINESS DIRECTORY

12 6

path Osteo rapist e h t o i Phys

find the clinic in the Municipal building next to the library

English, Spanish and some Scandinavian 616 779 034

45


46

44


No.1for MOTORBIKES

SOLO

MOTO’S

Mini-Bike’s Accessories

We Collect & Deliver Workshops ITV Servicing

SPECIAL OFFERS!!

on ds, Bikes, Mope Buggies, etc

We Speak English Spares Find us at: Santa Pola Ind. Est Santa Pola - Elche Road C/Mecanicos, 57 - Polg Ind.2 Santa Pola

96 541 4281

Showroom

Tel. Email: minimotos01@terra.es www.mini-motos.com

THE CHEAPEST ADVERTISING ON THE COSTA !!- TEL 606 540 408

45 47


Open: Mon - Sun 9.00am - 03.30am

Party every Night at 11.00pm

TERRACE OPEN and SERVING:

*hamburgers *hot dogs *sandwiches *potato chips Premiership Football *Birthdays *Stag & Hen Nights *Business Meetings Reservations Tel. 637 355 570

NKS FRAA b R

GRAN ALACANT Av. Mediterraneo 53, Local 1 Opp’ Thomas Green Supermarket 20

ST POFICE OF

THE CHEAPEST ADVERTISING ON THE COSTA !!- TEL 606 540 408


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