Back to school 2018_08_31.pdf

A Blank Slate Media/Litmor Publications Special Section • August 31, 2018

30 BACK TO SCHOOL • Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018

Nine keys to raising healthy children

BY D R . TOM F E R R A R O Sport Psychologist Every parent on earth wants one thing and that’s to raise happy and healthy kid who is motivated to work hard, be happy and become successful in their chosen profession. In today’s highly competitive world, the wish to raise a happy and hardworking child is extremely difficult.

There are countless dangers, distractions and difficulties that any family must face.

A major stumbling block could be that both parents must work and return home depleted. Divorce is also relatively commonplace and this is usually a major threat to a child’s mental health.

Even if the family remains intact the child may be faced with bullying, a hypercompetitive environment, distractions brought on by mindless digital games, and of course during teen years the danger of drug and alcohol use is a constant problem.

I’ve worked with children and families for over 30 years and I’ve had an insider’s view on both the right way and the wrong way to raise kids.

Here are the nine best ideas I have learned: 1. The foundation of the family is the love between husband and wife. Children feel good and safe when they see affec-

tion and respect between mother and father.

The way that love is maintained between spouses is to spend time together, fight fairly, use humor and also get away from the kids from time to time and take your own vacations. When I grew up I always knew my parents loved each other.

They would get away by themselves at least once a year on long trips and would come home happy and refreshed.

2. Parents should be role models on how to lead a full and happy life. It’s crucial to demonstrate this with the way your life is being led.

You need to have fun hobbies and

take enough time off. This gift you give to yourself is a gift to your children as well.

Children will automatically emulate these kind of behaviors.

As a simple example my dad would always bring two dozen donuts to his golf club every weekend, so the other members could enjoy the goodies before they all teed off.

When I became an adult I have the habit of always bringing a dozen donuts to professional conferences and seminars when I attend. I learned that nice form of gift giving by modeling my dad.

3. Kids need a stable and a predictable environment at home. The more you

can establish routines and expectations about how the day and the week will go the happier the kids will be.

When there is no set time for breakfast, dinner or weekend processes the child will tend to feel anxious, and confused. This is why divorce is so devastating since the predictable home environment like holidays, barbecues, birthdays and dinners tend to be demolished. Without this stable routine and especially with divorce the child learns to worry and to expect bad things to happen.

4. When you child wants your attention, put down the newspaper, turn off the TV and listen to them. This form of attention is needed by your child and they will learn self-respect and strength if you do it.

The best parenting skills I have ever seen is Earl Woods and how he raised Tiger Woods. He did exactly what I described.

When Tiger wanted his attention Earl would put down the paper and give his young son undivided attention. One of the central reasons people come to therapy is because no one has ever listened to them once in their life.

So save you children all those therapy costs in the future by listening to them when they ask for your time and attention. I Continued on Page 34

Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018 • BACK TO SCHOOL

31

The endless benefits of reading

BY E M I LY W I L L I S As the school year begins, it is easy to fall into the routine of watching TV and playing video games, instead of reading for pleasure. With homework and assigned readings, children may learn to think of reading as a chore.

Figuring out how to instill a love of reading in a child can seem like a daunting task, but it is very important to find ways to get children to read.

Academic Benefits Reading is a relaxing activity that can help children in all aspects of their lives. Children that read for fun tend to do better in school because it can help with their comprehension, writing, spelling, vocabulary, and concentration.

These children also tend to have a wider base of knowledge, have more articulate speech, and generally tend to do better on tests. Reading will also help to build a child’s imagination and creativity.

Life-Long Learning Benefits The texts they are given in school can only focus on a few subjects for a child to learn about.

Knowledge found by reading will help a child to discover who they are. When reading outside of school, children can explore any topic that they find an interest in.

They can learn about other people and cultures, discover a

new hobby they had not thought of, or reading can help them travel anywhere through time and space.

Tips for Parents To get your child reading, there is so much that can be done: • Set a reading example. The more your child sees you read; the more likely they will be to

read as well.

• Try not to criticize your child’s reading choice, any reading is good reading, so let your child start where their interests lie. Whether they like magazines, video game blogs, or comics, that reading will help them, and can eventually lead to them reading more novels.

• Start a book club with your

children so you can discuss the book as they read it.

• Read books aloud together so you experience the stories together.

• If your children want to see a movie that is based on a book, have them read the book first in order to be able to see the movie.

• Try listening to audio books. The audiobook can play as your child reads the book so they can read and listen to their story. Even when driving, try playing audiobooks in the car so the whole family can listen to the story together.

• Look for activities to do that relate to a book your child likes.

• Go to your local library.

Look around and explore the shelves and see what you can find. Ask a librarian for suggestions and see what they have going on.

As you go into the school year, try to add leisure reading to your daily routine. You and your children will reap the benefits for the rest of their lives.

Emily Willis, Youth Services Librarian www.willistonparklibrary.org

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32 BACK TO SCHOOL • Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018

Help kids calm first- T day-of-school jitters

he first day of school can be an exciting time, especially for children who have never before attended school. But even youngsters excited about the first day may also experience some jitters. Such nerves are normal, and parents can help kids calm those jitters in various ways.

Talk about the first day as it approaches. A child’s first day of school is a milestone, and parents may do various things to commemorate the occasion. The excitement leading up to the first day can spark kids’ enthusiasm, but it also may lead to some anxiety about the unknown. Parents can quell those fears by discussing the first day as it approaches. Explain why the first day is so special, encouraging youngsters to share their feelings. If kids express fears about their first day, parents can explain they felt similarly on their first day of school but quickly adjusted.

Let kids choose their own clothes.

Parents may be tempted to buy special outfits for their children for the first day of school. But kids who are jittery about their first day may calm down if allowed to choose their own attire for the big day. A favorite T-shirt or outfit might be just the thing to comfort kids feeling a bit nervous about their first day of school.

Get a head start on your morning routine. As summer winds down, begin acclimating children to the morning routine they can expect

when the school year begins. One to two weeks before the first day of school, start waking children up when they will need to be up for school.

Kids who are accustomed to the morning routine may be more calm on their first day of school because of their familiarity with their new schedule. Going cold turkey on the first day of school may make kids less enthusiastic about attending school.

Attend school orientation events and plan some play dates in advance of the first day. Seeing familiar faces might make kids forget all about their jitters when they arrive at school on the first day. Inquire about school orientation events and attend as many of those sessions as possible. If encouraged to do so, take kids along so they can meet prospective classmates. Arrange for play dates with those classmates in advance of the first day so kids have a few recognizable faces their own age come the first day of school.

Start the day off on the right foot.

The night before the first day of school, make sure kids’ outfits are clean, their supplies are packed and ready to go and their lunch is made.

The less parents have to rush around on the morning of the first day of school, the calmer kids are likely to be.

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Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018 • BACK TO SCHOOL

33

Promote healthy weight starting with school lunch A

lthough there are a variety of theories behind the growing obesity problem plaguing North American adults and children, the most consistent findings point to caloric intake as the culprit. Here’s a simple equation to get to the root of the problem: Calories eaten > calories spent = weight gain.

According to National Health Examination Surveys, adult obesity trends in the United States between 1976 and 2014 indicate the percentage of the adult population classified as obese has roughly doubled to more than 38 percent in the last three decades. Children may be learning eating habits from their parents, potentially contributing to rising obesity rates in children as well. Recent findings from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention indicate one in

five school-aged children and young people in the United States is obese. In Canada, the Public Health Agency says roughly one in seven children is obese.

Teaching children healthy eating habits starts at home and can extend to what students are given to eat while at school.

The Center for Science in the Public Interest says schools across the country are working hard to improve school nutrition. Here’s how parents and school districts can help make school lunches more nutritious and delicious and lower in calories.

Control snack intake. The U.S. Department of Agriculture says that more than one-fourth of kids’ daily caloric intake comes from snacking.

Choosing smarter snacks may help reduce overeating. Good snacks can include grain products that contain 50 percent or more whole grains by weight; snacks in which the primary ingredient is

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a fruit, a vegetable, dairy product, or lean protein; snacks that are a combination food that contain at least a 1⁄4 cup of fruits or vegetables; and foods that contain no more than 200 calories.

Read nutritional information. When selecting foods for school lunches, parents should read the nutritional information to make sure they know exactly what they are feeding their children. Select foods that are low in saturated fats and cholesterol and high in fiber and nutrient-rich fruits, vegetables, grains, and legumes.

Go with water. Rethinking beverage choices can help control kids’ caloric intake. Many people don’t realize just how many calories beverages add to their daily intake. Even a six-ounce, 100-percent apple juice can include as many as 96 calories. Sodas and other soft drinks pack a hefty caloric punch.

Water, seltzer and unsweetened iced tea

are healthy beverage options. If milk is the go-to beverage, choose a reduced-fat version.

Introduce new foods. Children can be notoriously picky eaters, but with patience and perseverance, parents can introduce new, healthy foods at lunchtime. Yogurt, hummus and salsa are healthy and can add flavor to vegetables and fruit. When making sandwiches, exchange refined breads for whole-grain varieties. Choose lean protein sources, and go heavy on vegetables and fruits for natural fiber, which will create feelings of satiety.

Read the school menu. Let children indulge in ordering from the school menu when healthy options are featured. Urge them to try something unexpected, rather than sticking to chicken nuggets or pizza days.

Healthy eating habits begin in childhood and can be initiated with school lunch.

34 BACK TO SCHOOL • Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018

Nine keys to raising healthy children Continued from Page 30 5. If you want your child to act a certain way all you have to do is to watch for the behavior you are looking for and then compliment them when they do it.

Most parents resort to yelling and screaming but that tends to create hard feelings and it doesn’t work. It is hard to be patient enough to watch for good behaviors but if you can persevere and do so over time the child will comply.

When they do homework compliment them. When they help around the house tell them you appreciate it. Universally kids want nothing more than parental approval.

6. Verbally educate your child on the way to speak, walk, dress and behave.

Etiquette is the lubricant that keeps society going and it falls on parents to

do much of this work. Teaching your child to sit upright, to look the person in the eye when speaking, to say thanks and please, to dress well and to groom themselves well are all crucial parts of upward social mobility and it takes training to learn it.

I was shopping in Brooks Brothers last weekend and watched as a father happily spent a small fortune on his kids clothing in preparation for the boys first year at Boston College. And that’s a good investment.

7. Spend money on your child’s sports or artistic interests.

They will be in an environment that instills discipline, social skills, competitiveness and fitness all while being supervised by adults. The net result is huge gains in self-respect, social connections, fitness and improved mood.

8. Teach courage by example. One of the most important things a child can learn is that it’s okay to take chances, to fail and finally to succeed.

You can encourage this by modeling it yourself and they will learn by example. Here is a story of courage that I always tell my interns about the value of courage. The first time I was on TV the producer came out during the break and said I was doing a nice job.

I asked him why he had invited me on the air and he remarked: “You were the only one who called.”

I took that as a great compliment because he was right. I was the one who had a concept I wanted to talk about, I hunted down the producer’s phone number and made my pitch. And by the next day, I was in a limo, driven into Manhattan and did the show.

Most people would like to be on TV but apparently I was one of the few who had the courage to actually call up and ask to be on.

9. Towards the end of his life, noted American writer Henry Miller was interviewed in his home in Big Sur and was asked what advice he would give to parents on how to raise a healthy child.

He smiled at the interviewer and said “That’s very simple. Make sure you tell them you love them every day.

I think many parents make the assumption that their child knows this but it’s worth reminding them each day.”

Life is filled with problems and competition and challenges and kids need parents that can show them the way. I certainly hope my little stories help you in raising happy, healthy, successful and brave children.

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Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018 • BACK TO SCHOOL

35

Questions to ask when looking for an after-school program are and how conducive to doing homework the environment is.

Many of today’s working professionals grew up in single-income households where only one of their parents went to work each day. But that once-common dynamic is now largely a thing of the past, as economic necessity has driven both moms and dads to continue their careers even after they have had children.

That reality has led many working parents to lean heavily on afterschool programs to serve as safe havens that provide structure for their kids while mom and dad are still at work. Choosing an after-school program is a decision many parents find difficult, but there are some questions parents can ask during their searches for programs that should make those decisions easier.

Can I tour and observe the facility?

When considering a particular afterschool program for their children, parents should ask to tour the facility, paying specific attention to the areas of the facility where their youngsters will spend the bulk of their time. Do the classrooms look clean? Are the materials up-to-date? Is the playground equipment safe and well-maintained? Wellmaintained facilities with new supplies and equipment can make the program more enjoyable and safer for kids.

Parents also should ask to spend some time observing the facility when it is abuzz with activity. Such observation can give parents an idea of what their kids’ afternoons will be like should they enroll in the program. Stay out of the way, but watch to see how engaged kids and staff members

ray of activities that range from academic programs to athletic events and more. A wide range of programs can increase the chances that youngsters will find activities What is the program schedule?

Schedule is a significant issue for that pique their interests and make the afworking parents, many of whom want a pro- terschool program more enjoyable. gram that is open on holidays when schools are closed. Flexibility also is a concern for How are staff members vetted? working parents, some of whom may need Parents also may want to ask about a facility that is open before school starts. the program’s hiring practices. Ask about Parents also may want a facility that al- the background checks performed on staff lows youngsters to attend just a few days a members and if the facility requires any week, which might make certain programs specific certifications for staff who will be that require parents to commit to full weeks dealing directly with children. less enticing. When discussing the facility When asking about hiring practices, schedule with staff members, be sure to get parents also may want to inquire about as specific a schedule as possible, inquiring the ratio of staff members to children. The about any additional costs associated with smaller the ratio, the more attention youngextending the typical schedule as well. sters will receive. Facilities with an especially high ratio of staff to children may not What are the activities available be able to provide the type of environment parents want for their children. to the kids?

Many afterschool programs provide Finding an afterschool program requires more than just a place for kids to sit and do their homework until their folks come parents to exercise their due diligence. Parto pick them up. Ask staff members at the ents who can be patient and learn as much facility how big a role activities play in their about facilities as possible are more likely to programs. Many programs try to offer an ar- find the right fit for their children.

36 BACK TO SCHOOL • Blank Slate Media Newspapers, Friday, August 31, 2018

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