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Volume CXVI, No. 10
Milli Mən heç kim Azərbaycan danışmaq və mən , həqiqətən, bu bütün bölmə doldurulması kimi hiss etmirəm bilir təxmin edirəm. Hər kəs Azərbaycan dilini etmir əgər Bəli , mən səhvlər onlarla burada yəqin ki, var ki, bilirik. Bəlkə də trilyon . Yaxşı təbrik edirəm , cənab smartypants . Hər halda , burada bəlkə bir real maddə kimi baxmaq üçün bəzi adlar və yerlərdir. Barak Obama kimi mətbuat və ya bir şey bu açıqladı. Joe Biden heç bir şey etmədi . ISIS onlar ISIS şeyler davam edirik söylədi . Sonu. Digər xəbərlər, mən hələ də burada daha çox yer doldurmaq lazımdır . Burada daha çox adları var . Bu hekayə nüfuzunu etmək üçün bu az tanış olacaq. Senator Ted Sandwich o ürəkdən qanun dəstək verəcəklərini söylədi . Wow . Azərbaycan sendviç üçün bir söz yoxdur. Mən bütün gün eşitmişəm ən faciəli hekayə deyil. Kimsə ki, bir hekayə etmək lazımdır . Bir sıra ciddi heyəti var.
Beynəlxalq Dünya xaos edir. Bu zaman o, həmişə olacaq olmuşdur. Zaman üçün təşəkkür edirik. Orson Wellees belə yağ var niyə görəsən? Mən o yəqin ki, bir məşqçi təmin etdik bilər və o, bir qəhrəman və / və ya növ bir dahi kimi özünü görüb çox meylli görünürdü edirəm. Mən yalnız o ego çox istədiyiniz düşündüm . Yaxşı Oh. Mən Google bu bütün yardım üçün tərcümə təşəkkür etmək istərdim . Siz gözəl kömək oldum . İndi burada yalnız bir hərfi cəfəngiyyatdır. Sandwich heartstrings Birləşmiş Millətlər teztez oh sendviç üçün heç bir söz var gözləyin oxuyur ürək qırıqlıqları . Wow . Mən hələ ki, artıq ala bilmir . Bu deli var .
Bu həftə “Top hekayələri” tərcümə Google informasiya ilə Brendan Raleigh tərəfindən tərtib edilmişdir .
Thursday, April 2, 2015
Thursday, April 2, 2015
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G-Burg to be renamed after deal with soda corp. G-burg College set to be renamed “Gettysburg College, Sponsored by Bisom Cola” in 2016 By Brendan Raleigh News Editor Following the 2014-2015 academic year, Gettysburg College as students know it will cease to exist -- at least under the name “Gettysburg College.” After weeks of negotiations with the new, but rapidly expanding, Bisom Cola Company, the college finally settled on a deal that would alter the college’s name in exchange for a number of financial gifts from the Bisom Cola Company. “It is really a fantastic deal for both parties,” commented Bisom Cola CEO Arnold Levinthall. “With our recent sales numbers, we have plenty of excess cash to spend on stuff like this. And it shows that Gettysburg really likes Bisom Cola, too.” Levinthall continued to explain his thoughts behind the unorthodox marketing strategy. “We’re not just advertising to the students and faculty with this. Everytime a graduate of the college submits a job application, that employer will read that they graduated from ‘Gettysburg College, Sponsored by Bisom Cola.’ It shows that they graduated from a school that is not only hip, but is also a big fan of Bisom Cola. It’s a win-win.” In addition to paying a sum of over $95,000 to the college, Bisom Cola has also offered students a 10% discount on all Bisom Cola products, so long as they are purchased on a weekday
Photo Credit: facebook.
The recent financial gifts of Bisom Cola Company have purchased a few small changes for Gettysburg College, the most prominent being the requirement that the college follow its name with “Sponsored by Bisom Cola” on all official documents. CEO Arnold Levinthall (pictured at a time between 9 a.m. and 11 their dissatisfaction with the as if they have to call the school college plans to construct various ‘Gettysburg College, Sponsored advertisements and memorials in a.m. trade-off. Given Gettysburg ColFirst-year Justin Gumas by Bisom Cola’ every time they honor of Bisom Cola. lege students’ recent purchasing commented on the renaming, mention it, but this is far from All drinks in the dining trends, such a discount could saying, “Although there are some the truth. We would prefer it, halls will be replaced with Biamount to dozens of dollars over species, such as the woodcock, of course and we can take legal som Cola brand drinks, such as the next few years, according to which seem to be prone to fly- recourse if any students choose “Bisom Cola Milk Soda” and Levinthall. ing into windows, there is little not to refer to the college by its “Bisom Cola Carbonated, CafBisom Cola, founded by evidence of the issue affecting full name, but in many ways, it is feinated Cola Water.” Gettysburg Levinthall in 2013, has been the conservation status of any still up to the students. They can College is not the first school to still call it ‘Gettysburg College,’ sell its name to a prominent doquickly making a name for itself species.” in the soda industry, taking the The Bisom Company has just so long as they are fine with nor, however. In 2012, Dickinson places of Pepsi or Coca Cola as received many similar complaints being sued for it.” College was famously purchased The change is set to take by North Korean leader Kim the drink-of-choice in six differ- from students recently, but CEO ent states in America. Arnold Levinthall commented place at the beginning of the Jong-un for the price of ₩30 trilDespite the soda com- that he is sure that students are 2015-2016 academic year. lion North Korean wons, which, With the new money ac- in U.S. dollars, amounts to appany’s immense financial gifts, overreacting. “Most students are acting quired from the transaction, the proximately $43. some students have expressed
An unusual perspective on the G-burg looks back College’s Panhellenic Week on history of April 1 By Julia Sippel Staff Writer
By Julia Sippel Staff Writer
Though rushing has yet to commence, some on campus are too excited to wait until fall. As Panhellenic events familiarize students with the various facets of Gettysburg Greek life, other members of the campus community are preparing in their own ways. These events are intended to allow freshman and others who aren’t yet affiliated with a sororityhere at Gettysburg- that includes Alpha Delta Pi (ΑΔΠ), Gamma Phi Beta (ΓΦΒ), Delta Gamma (ΔΓ), Sigma Sigma Sigma (ΣΣΣ) and Chi Omega (ΧΩ)- to familiarize themselves with the groups. “I’d love to rush any of them,” said Geneva Wilson, a Gettysburg College squirrel,” but we have our own sororities!” Greek life has long been a facet of the campus squirrel experience. Nu Upsilon Tau (ΝΥΤ) is the oldest rodent
According to the History Channel, the exact origins of All Fools’ Day are uncertain. In place of certainty, various possibilities have been suggested. The most commonly cited story of origin takes place in France on April 1, 1852. This was the first time that New Year’s Day was celebrated on January 1, as dictated by the Gregorian calendar, instead of the Julian Calendar’s April 1. Without modern technology to inform the masses of the switch, many were unaware and celebrated on the latter date. Those who knew better terrorized those who did not with jokes, placing paper fish called poisson d’avril (fish of April) on their backs to symbolize their gullibility. Another possible start includes ancient festivals, such as the festival of Hilaria. Honoring Cybele, goddess of victory, Hilaria was celebrated on the vernal equinox. Of the many possibilities, this coordinates most closely with
Inside This Issue
This Week’s Top Stories
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Skeleton of the week, pg. 2
Geneva Wilson, a sister of Nu Upsilon Tau, discusses Gettysburg College’s oft-overlooked rodent Greek life.
sorority in the nation, with chapters at Harvard University, the College of William and Mary, George Was h in g to n Un iv ers ity , Yale University, Princeton University, University of California, Los Angeles and Gettysburg College. Other Gettysburg Squirrel Sorority chapters include Rho Delta Nu Tau (ΡΔΝΤ), Sigma Rho Lambda (ΣΡΛ) and Alpha Gamma Rho Nu (ΑΓΡΝ). Just like in the human Panhellenic week, these are not formal recruiting
Get Acquainted Day concert, pg. 3
events. Instead, they are intended to let potential new members get to know current members and to allow those who have not yet made a definite decision to make up their minds. “Just keep an open mind,” said Wilson, “and you’ll be fine!” Registration for 2015 formal recruitment is available at http://www. gettysburg.edu/about/ offices/college_life/osagl/ greek/ or at the tree nearest you!
College looks to trailers for housing, pg. 4
Students of Gettysburg, pg. 4
Photo Credit: blogspot.com
The history of April Fools’ day is long and complex. this year’s April Fools’ Day historians back up this supposed correlation by comparing Mother Nature’s unpredictable weather with the antics of the modern holiday. While the exact origins are unclear, April Fools’ Day will doubtlessly continue to be celebrated for years to come.
Women’s tennis Letter from a team fights #meninist, stomach bug pg. 5 on court, pg. 6