W H A T
columnists
Y O U G L O W
D I F F E R E N T L Y
W H E N Y O U R
C O N F I D E N C E I S
F U E L E D B Y
Y O U R S E L F
I N S T E A D O F
VA L I D AT I O N F R O M
O T H E R S .
I don’t know who coined ‘crazy cat lady’ and thought they delivered a stroke of linguistic genius, but it has the unmistakeable scent of a man with little emotional range with women, and even less success with cats
And before anyone comes at me with some man-hating accusations, I want to make something very clear:
Not every man...but always a man.
In July of 2021, Vice Presidential Candidate JD Vance while campaigning for the U.S. Senate, claimed that the United States was being run by "a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they’ve made and so they want to make the rest of the country miserable too".
Like baby, we’re just out here living our best lives When did we ever claim to be miserable? Are you okay??
Language is powerful because it creates clarity, defines roles, and establishes expectations Even when those expectations are not formally written into law, they can still function as unwritten rules that shape behavior, influence social norms, and ultimately define our culture
But as of today we are refusing to let “crazy cat lady” remain a cheap punch line used to diminish us
Oh my gosh I’m just joking. (For the most part.)
History has a long list of name calling when it comes to women who refuse to “behave” or choose to live outside of perceived societal expectations.
Quick example? An unmarried man was commonly referred to a bachelor whereas an unmarried woman was called a spinster. One gives Rex Harrington in My Fair Lady and the other gives Miss Havisham in Great Expectations Just unpack that for a second
If dogs are a mans best friend due to their unwavering loyalty, unquestioning obedience, and an eagerness to please, then perhaps cats have always belonged beside women
You know what, actually, call me crazy. Because Heaven forbid a woman embody independence, discernment, firm boundaries, and the radical expectation that affection should be earned rather than demanded.
This is not the nineteeth centruy, when women’s economic security and social standing were closely tied to marriage. Where a whisper of scandal could cost a woman her
Y O U R L I F E
I S N O T Y O U R S
I F Y O U A L WAY S
C A R E W H AT
O T H E R P E O P L E
T H I N K
courtship prospects, social standing, thereby access to a secure future.
We are blessed to live in this day in age, despite whatever current political turbulence, because keep in mind this is not ancient herstory. Less than 52 years ago, a woman could still be denied credit in her own name simply because she was a woman It wasn’t until 1974, when the Equal Credit Opportunity Act made it illegal for lenders to discriminate based on sex or marital status.
Women are finally earning their own money, building their own lives, and spending that grown money on things they actually want instead of performing the version of adulthood or womanhood society decided should make them happy,
A woman no longer needs to be chosen in order to survive She can choose herself She can choose peace, independence, fulfillment, and yes, as many cats as she damn well pleases.
You are not selfish for flying solo You are not miserable because you choose to live alone, remain unmarried, or enjoy the company of others without building your entire life around them
You are allowed to not want children I’m saying this as a mom of three who would have had more if my body let me. You are not broken or wrong for not choosing that life You are allowed to reject monogamy, long term relationships, traditional domesticity, or
whatever polished version of womanhood Good Housekeeping has decided to sell this month.
You are not incomplete, difficult, lonely, or failing. You are wonderful exactly as you are. You are a whole woman with a life that belongs entirely to you
You are beautiful in ways that have nothing to do with how well you fit into someone else’s expectations. You are allowed to build a life even when it looks nothing like the life you were told to want
You are important, deeply valued, and worthy of taking up space in this world without explaining the life you choose
Your existence does not need to be justified by a partner, a child, a title, or anyone else’s approval
And you’re allowed to be a bitch when someone tells you otherwise.
So yes girl, go crazy
PS. Kiss your cat for me.
S C H E D U L E
S A T U R D A Y 1 7
A w a k e n i n g Y o u r W h o l e S e l f
w i t h Y o g i s D i o n a P e l t c s
A d a p t i v e G r o o m i n g f o r C h r o n i c P a i n
w i t h D r J a n e l l e S c h e n k
T h e F u t u r e o f H o l i s t i c F e l i n e C a r e
M o d e r a t e d P a n e l
I n j u r y P r e v e n t i o n f o r G r o o m e r s
w i t h D r J a n e l l e S c h e n k
S U N D A Y 1 8
T e n d i n g Y o u r D i g i t a l G a r d e n
w i t h M e r c e d e s S c h e n k C F M G
B u r n o u t + C o m p a s s i o n F a t i g u e
w i t h D r J e n n i f e r M a n d i g o
U n M a s k i n g S u c c e s s
w i t h D r . N o e l l e Y o u n g
B u i l d i n g B r i d g e s
M o d e r a t e d P a n e l
M O N D A Y 1 9
C a l l i n g B a c k Y o u r E n e r g y
w i t h Y o g i s D i o n a P e l t c s
F i l l i n g Y o u r C u p
b r e a k o u t a c t i v i t i e s + n e t w o r k i n g
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Holistic Feline Summit
October 2026 17th - 19th
Something transformative is coming to the Feline Industry, and it’s happening in Sedona, Arizona this fall! Due to popular demand, we have decided to open a few more spaces for those individuals ready and eager for a weekend not just of education, but wholeperson wellness. This isn’t just another groomer conference or expo, but a retreat for the mind, body, and career.
We’re gathering in one of Sedona’s most breathtaking and restorative resorts at Modern Mountain to blend professional growth with personal renewal. Come learn, reconnect with yourself and your craft, and rediscover your passion for the work you do. Join other individuals from all over the country for networking, socializing, and simply basking in one of our nation’s most powerful metaphysical sites.
Spaces are extremely limited, and this will be the last opportunity we have to open ticket sales. Tickets were sold out November of 2025, so don’t wait too long as they are expected to go fast.
This year’s lineup includes powerful sessions with field professionals such as Dr. Janelle Schenk OTD, Dr. Jennifer Mandigo PsyD., Dr. Noelle Young, and Mercedes Schenk CFMG.
A cat you
adoptedonpurpose
A strong opinion about people who say they “don’t like cats”
Understands Feline Conditional Lap Paralysis
A cat (or four) who simply appea
The ability to hear gagging from three rooms away
lint rollers everywhere
One piece of furniture officially surrendered to scratching
Poopy Paws on the counter
A cabinet full of treats they suddenly refuse to eat
Adesignated cat voice you swear is completely normal
At least 400 photos of the same sleeping position
(no shame)
A cardboard box more beloved than the expensive cat bed
A G I R L W H O I S
G O I N G T O D O B I G
T H I N G S C A N N O T
L E T S M A L L
T H I N G S G E T T O
H E R .
We have all heard the saying, “Dogs are man’s best friend.” No one really argues with it. Dogs have certainly earned the title They have spent thousands of years hunting beside us, guarding our homes, watching over our children, rescuing people from disasters, and greeting us at the door as though we have been gone forever, even when it was only ten minutes
But when you think about the endless cat memes, cat cafés, businesses devoted exclusively to cats, and the number of people proudly calling themselves cat lovers, it makes you wonder whether cats have quietly become women’s best friends.
It is not because women do not love dogs Of course we do. However, there seems to be something about the relationship between women and cats that runs a little deeper It feels like an understanding that does not need words
Looking back, it is remarkable that the very traits that once made women and cats seem threatening, including independence, intelligence, resilience,
and self determination, are now among the qualities we appreciate most.
So, are cats really a woman’s best friend?
I am not sure they belong to women any more than dogs belong to men
What I do know is that, after spending years working with cats, they have taught me lessons about patience, boundaries, resilience, and trust I have watched it happen over and over again A frightened feral foster kitten that hissed at every hand can eventually learn to trust through patience, kindness, love, and yes, a few treats.
Perhaps women and cats recognize something familiar in one another. Neither responds well to being controlled. Both value trust over force, quiet confidence over loud attention, and relationships built on mutual respect rather than obedience
Maybe that is why they have understood each other for thousands of years They just happened to be speaking the same language all along.
You didn’t choose this work because it was easy
You chose working with live animals as challenging as cats because you have passion, brilliance, and refuse to settle for “good enough” when it comes to the way we interact with them. That level of dedication deserves special distinction, on a global level
The Association of Holistic Feline Specialists is compromised of individuals who are actively changing the narrative on feline care across the globe. This isn’t just about joining a club and printing out a piece of paper It’s about committing to excellence and telling the world that you choose to be held accountable in an unregulated industry And that they should too
We are where passion meets credibility
Memberships include:
Certificate of Recognition, documenting official association as an AFHS Member and the professional pledge and code of ethics you’ve chosen to conduct yourself
AHFS Directory Listing as Holistic Feline Professional so individuals can find you and the services you provide
First access to educational summits and exclusive invitation to annual symposiums
Discounted Classes/Seminars
The Association of Holistic Feline Specialists is a non profit organization. 100% of Membership dues sustains our organization, including Pussy Talk the Podcast and our monthly free educational magazine “What’s The Mews”
Cats don’t have a voice in the standards we set, but they live with the results of them This work is bigger than any one professional, and the cats who depend on us deserve more than individual effort, they deserve a unified standard, a collective commitment, and professionals who choose to stand together to do better
Are you ready to give it to them??
There is a reason groomers who specialize in cats get teased We choose to work with animals that other groomers see as risky, difficult, and, frankly, not worth the effort Dogs are easier. Dogs are more predictable. Dogs come with far fewer complications.
So why do some of us lean into cats anyway?
Because we have figured out something that translates directly to the bottom line: cat people are some of the most valuable clients you will ever have Building a business around them is not a personality quirk. It is a competitive strategy.
It all starts with how we actually treat the
Most cat groomers will tell you that it is not really about the haircut or brushout It is about respect Cats are not small dogs, and groomers who treat them that way often struggle. The ones who thrive are those who slow down, read the animal, and adjust everything according to what that specific cat needs that day
We have warmed towels for senior cats arriving on cold days We have created little pillow setups on the table to help anxious cats feel more settled before we even begin. Is it extra? Sure. But it works, and our clients notice
That expertise, paired with a willingness to pay close attention to each cat, creates an experience. That experience has a price tag
When clients arrive convinced that their cat will be a disaster and leave with a calm, beautifully groomed pet, something shifts. When they see their cat become overwhelmed in the grooming environment and, instead of pushing through, you stop the appointment and explain what their cat was communicating, they understand that they are working with someone who truly knows cats
Once they realize their pet is being treated not as a small, inconvenient dog, but as an animal with distinct needs and boundaries, they stop shopping around. They book the next appointment before they leave.
Client retention is the first business outcome.
Cat clients often stay longer than any other type of client Why? Because switching salons means starting over with someone who might not understand. Cat owners have learned the hard way that not every groomer does They will stay with you through multiple price increases because they know what they have found is rare.
Cat owners also talk They are passionate, active online, and deeply connected to other cat people Finding a groomer who truly understands cats is a big deal within that community Word spreads quickly, and it spreads far That kind of referral cannot be bought because it comes from genuine trust. Cat people do not recommend someone unless they are completely sold on the experience
The perceived value of your services increases when you offer real expertise. When you charge for an experience that is genuinely better, people understand the difference They pay more because the outcome is worth it.
There is no anxiety about the appointment There is no coming home to a stressed cat There is no wondering whether their pet was handled roughly or pushed beyond their limits. That peace of mind carries a premium, and cat owners who have worked with groomers who do not understand cats will absolutely pay it.
Y O U D I D N ’ T
L E A R N
T O S W I M
B Y R E A D I N G
A B O U T I T.
Your reputation becomes your brand
When you know your craft and people recognize it, the work becomes easier You can charge more because people are coming to you specifically for your expertise, not because you are the least expensive option Your brand becomes stronger People know what to expect You become known as the groomer who understands cats, and that reputation
not pay premium prices for a mediocre experience.
Building a cat grooming business that actually lasts requires more than adding cats to your service menu. It takes a sincere commitment to understanding the animal, knowing when to continue and when to stop, and treating cat grooming as its own discipline rather than as a side hustle
S C H E D U L E
S A T U R D A Y 1 6
T h e S c i e n c e o f S u s t a i n a b l e G r o o m i n g
w i t h D r J a n e l l e S c h e n k O T D , O T R / L
T e c h n i c a l T u n e U p
w i t h M e l B r i n k , C F M G a n d N C G I C e r t i f i e r
C r e a t u r e s o f t h e C a t w a l k S h o w c a s e
C r e a t i v e C a t G r o o m i n g + C o s t u m e C o n t e s t
C r e a t i v e G r o o m i n g : C o l o r + C u t s
w i t h A l e x a n d r i a K o r b C F M G +
S e A n d r i a D u c k w o r t h
T h e P r i c e I s R i g h t : G r o o m e r G a m e s h o w
w i t h L y n n P a o l i l l o C F M G a n d N C G I C e r t i f i e r
M e r c e d e s S c h e n k C F M G
T h e W i t c h i n g H o u r
A t t e n d e e C o s t u m e P a r t y
S U N D A Y 1 7
B u i l d a B e t t e r B o a r d i n g B u s i n e s s
w i t h M e l B r i n k , C F M G a n d N C G I C e r t i f i e r
S m o o s h y F a c e d M a s t e r c l a s s
w i t h L y n n P a o l i l l o C F M G a n d N C G I C e r t i f i e r
K e y n o t e P u b l i c E d u c a t i o n
w i t h S p e a k e r T B A
K e y n o t e P u b l i c E d u c a t i o n
w i t h S p e a k e r T B A
T h e F e l i n e S u p e r s t i t i o u s O p e n
O p e n C a t G r o o m i n g C o m p e t i t i o n
R a f f l e W i n n e r s A n n o u n c e d
C a n Y o u H a n d l e I t ?
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M O N D A Y 1 8
F e l i n e F i r s t C e r t i f i c a t i o n C o u r s e
w i t h M e r c e d e s S c h e n k C F M G +
T h e A s s o c i a t i o n o f H o l i s t i c F e l i n e S p e c i a l i s t s
C o n f e r e n c e R o o m
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M a i n S t a g e
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The Association of Holistic Feline Specialists is proud to announce the arrival of what the feline industry has been waiting for! A cat exclusive grooming convention featuring feline first education, professional development, and industry connection.
The El Zaribah Shrine is conveniently located approximately three miles from Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport, or about a seven to ten minute drive depending on traffic. The surrounding area offers a wide range of hotel accommodations, from luxury properties to budget friendly options The venue has also generously offered secured overnight parking for registered RV guests
Weekend Education Pass Tickets are $350 and include Saturday + Sunday classes and the Saturday Night Social. The Feline First Certification Course is a separate $220 ticket as there is limited seating
Can You Handle It? is a professional panel exploring practical ways to safely and comfortably handle cats during grooming. Educators will demonstrate and discuss table, lap, and floor grooming, along with techniques for working with wiggly cats, senior cats, medically fragile cats, and cats with challenging temperaments Attendees will have opportunities to ask questions and learn from the perspectives of several experienced feline groomers
The Price Is Right: Grooming Gameshow is an interactive cat grooming game show where audience members compete in a series of educationally impactful games Uncover hidden expenses, challenge unsustainable pricing habits, and determine what your feline grooming appointment should truly cost. You may not win a new car, but you might finally stop giving away your time for free.
Women have spent generations competing with one another, tearing each other down and believing there was only room for one female at the table.
As a society, I feel like it’s pretty safe to say that we’re finally shifting towards celebrating each other’s successes, supporting one another’s businesses, not letting any boyshit come between us, and choosing collaboration over competition We’re here to hype, and I love that.
But, somewhere along the way I think we started confusing support with silence
As professionals, sometimes we find ourselves in situations where it would honestly be in everyone’s best interest if we just addressed what we were seeing in the moment In the same breath, that’s also exceptionally difficult because so many of us either work independently or work under someone else So speaking up can feel like overstepping, getting involved in someone else’s business, or questioning a person who may technically have more authority than we do.
Working with live animals makes these conversations even more complicated. We all 26
have different handling styles, different levels of experience, or different tools in our toolbox. Because of that, it can be hard to know whether what we’re witnessing is a legitimate welfare concern or simply a different required approach. But you know, you know. I know, you know.
We all eventually find ourselves in situations that make our stomach drop Maybe it’s a coworker handling an animal a little too intensely. Maybe it’s a business owner cutting corners Perhaps it’s someone using unnecessary force because they’re frustrated A lot of the time it’s a practice that isn’t technically illegal but it certainly isn’t ethical.
In those moments, so many of us freeze We don’t want to create conflict or embarrass ourselves. I don’t want to take away from the fear of losing your job or creating a toxic work environment because it is so valid No one wants to be labeled as dramatic, difficult, or disloyal so we say nothing Or worse, we say nothing until we’re venting to someone else after the fact. Suddenly weeks later, SURPRISE! It becomes an anonymous Facebook post, a one star review from a throw away account, or a whisper passed around at a trade show.
understand the desperation that happens with wanting to affect change. Especially when our legal system is not very supportive with animal cruelty when it comes to mishandling or borderline abuse So we’re it folks
Most people become defensive when they feel attacked That’s human nature, and most of us who take up a career in this industry are some kind of sensitive When someone feels cornered, they stop listening and start protecting themselves. The opportunity for learning fades away into a sea of excuses, projections, counter accusations, and usually character defamation for self soothing
When people become defensive, they tend to put up even more barriers Suddenly, there is less transparency because they never believed what they were doing was actually that bad. By the time they hear concerns about the situation, they are usually no longer in that same emotional headspace Once they are calm, it becomes easier to rationalize their behavior because they do not see themselves as a bad person. Hindsight creates more room to minimize what happened or come up with reasons that justify their actions
I’m going to be so for real with you right now None of this helps the cat and it certainly wont help that person from making the same mistake again. And yes, we care about the person
Ironically, public call outs can create the exact opposite of what you’re hoping for. I totally
Now, when they are suddenly faced with public ridicule and shame, their response is no longer centered on changing their behavior Instead, they react to protect their livelihood, income, and reputation. It stops being about learning from their mistakes and becomes about defending their choices and double downing on why it is okay As a result, poor behavior doesn’t just become excused, but defended and thereby openly accepted.
B E T H E R E A S O N
O T H E R W O M E N
T H I N K
T H E Y C A N
D O I T T O O
Being a Girl’s Girl does not mean being a Yes Girl. It means being real with them.
Believe it or not there is something harder than Level 3 Aggressive Cats: courageous conversations. Sometimes the most impactful thing we can do is talk to the person in the moment when we see it
Advocacy does not begin online It starts in the moment, in the same room you’re watching it all go down. The truth is that difficult conversations are a professional skill Many of us avoid confrontation becasue we associate it with conflict We imagine yelling, accusations, and hurt feelings. Healthy confrontation isn’t any of those things Healthy confrontation is calm, kind, curious, and compassionate It’s rooted in a genuine desire to improve outcomes rather than win an argument.
Sometimes the most compassionate thing you can say is, “Hey, I don’t think that’s working ” Real support isn’t blind agreement, it’s caring enough to help someone be better and get
I’m not a psychologist so I can’t tell you the best way to go about it. I can tell you that those conversations are uncomfortable. Your heart will race and you’ll rethink the conversation a thousand times in your head You’ll worry they’ll hate you after and practice it a million times. You can’t control how they react but you can control how you express those concerns to them Communication, and conflict resolution are all skills that can be learned. Again, I don’t know what will be best for you but I know you can find a licensed professional to help
What I do know is that animals do not have a voice in these moments. We do. And if you’re willing to advocate for them online after the fact, you should be willing to advocate for them in person while it still has the power to make a difference.
Being a girls girl isn’t about protecting someone from accountability It’s about caring enough to hold them accountable with compassion.
BECOME A VENDOR
Put your business in f ront of passionate cat owners and feline professionals.
Feline Superstitious is the United States’ f irst and only cat grooming convention, bringing together cat owners, groomers, breeders, rescues, and other feline enthusiasts for an unforgettable weekend of education, competition, shopping, and community.
EACH VENDOR BOOTH INCLUDES:
Pipe, drape, table, chairs
Vendor logo + link listed on website
Social media announcements leading up to the event
Overnight venue security
Indoor climate control
$50 Discount for Raffle Contributions
* * * Electrical outlets available as add on
LIMITED SPACES
code of ethics
I will prioritize the wellbeing, safety, and overall health of the cats in my care.
I will strive to always conduct myself with honesty, integrity, and transparency
I will treat all cats with compassion, patience, kindness, and respect
I will continue to seek knowledge and resources that will contribute to my skills and abilities, so that I may safely and better serve the cats in my care.
