Sex and Dating Guide Spring 2020

THE DAILY ILLINI February 10, 2020

Sex & Dating Guide

Monday, February 10, 2020

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The grass is greener: Consider eco-friendly birth control

BY AVA TRAVERSO SPECIAL SECTIONS EDITOR

This Valentine’s Day, being able to spend time with your significant other can be one of the best parts of the holiday. Moreover, taking steps to make responsible choices is one of the biggest steps you can take to make this holiday the best it can be. There is a way to be safe with your health while being kind to the earth. Over half of Generation Z and Millennials acknowledge that the earth is getting warmer due to human activity (54% and 56% respectively, versus just 45% of baby boomers), according to Pew Research Center. This stat is just one example of Millennials and Gen Zers wanting to lead more environmentally conscious lives than previous generations, and a place to start could be with a greener birth control option. Here are common birth control types ranked for their environmental footprint, effectiveness and ease of use.

Also, I will not be including withdrawal as a birth control method due to the lack of effectiveness of the method, with 96% pregnancy prevention with perfect use, but 78% with regular use.

The IUD (hormonal or copper)/The arm implant (Nexplanon)

IUDs and the Nexplanon are the top-shelf, elite options of the birth control world. The hormonal and copper IUDs and the arm implant all boost pregnancy prevention rates to over 99% effectiveness. That means that less than one woman gets pregnant on these methods a year. They are considered as effective as sterilization while still remaining reversible. These methods are the greenest because they produce the least amount of waste. After you get your IUD or implant inserted, they do not produce any waste for years to come, unlike condom wrappers or empty pill packs.

CASSIDY BRANDT THE DAILY ILLINI

Birth control shot

The birth control shot comes in at second place for multiple reasons. Even though the effectiveness of the shot is lower than that of the IUD and the Nexplanon, it remains higher than the patch, pill and ring at 94% with normal use. This method is really easy to use because you get one shot every three months or so and you are protected from pregnancy.

This method is on the higher end of sustainability due to the lack of waste it generates between receiving your quarterly doses. The only waste this method generates is with the syringe and the medicine bottle.

Birth control patch/pill/ ring

The pill, patch and ring require more work to be put in from the user than the previously listed methods. The pill has to be taken daily, the patch has to be changed weekly and the ring has to be taken out once a month and changed. These three methods all come in at around 99% prevention with perfect use but fall to be closer to approximately 91% effective with normal use. Even though the packaging that these methods come in generates a bit of waste, it is worth noting that hormonal birth control methods often lighten or get rid of the

user’s period. This means a decrease in the use ted diseases, so that is a very important factor of menstrual products like tampons or pads. to take into any contraceptive decisions you are making this Valentine’s Day! Something to keep in mind when choosing a Condoms, the tried and true method, is easy contraceptive method based on carbon footto access and generally pretty cheap or even print is that whatever waste your method of free. The problem with condoms, however, is choice produces, it is only a drop in the bucket that they need to be used correctly every time compared to the emissions an accidental pregyou have sex in order to achieve the 98% per- nancy would produce. Because of this, the most fect use rate. In reality, their effectiveness lies important factors to consider when choosing a closer to an 85% normal usage rate. They also lie method should be effectiveness and user preflower on the footprint scale because every time erence. With these facts, I hope you are armed you use a condom, there is a plastic or foil wrap- to make smart and sexy decisions this Valenper that is left behind and thrown into the trash. tine’s Day weekend.

Condoms are the only method on this list that protects against the spread of sexually transmit- avat2@readbuzz.com

Condoms

Monday, February 10, 2020

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Consider this playlist for your next makeout session

BY CAROLINA GARIBAY ASSISTANT BUZZ EDITOR

Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching, which means it’s time to get all of those V-Day playlists ready for whatever situation you find yourself in. This might mean making a romantic dinner playlist, a singles playlist or maybe even a girls’ night out playlist, depending on what your plans are for Valentine’s Day. One of the most essential playlists someone can have ready to go, though, both for Valentine’s Day and just for life in general, is a make-out playlist.

Just in case you don’t already have a make-out playlist of your own, I’ve created one that sets the mood for any type of make out session you may find yourself in. This playlist features a variety of songs and artists, including Ed Sheeran, Norah Jones, Daniel Caesar and more, so you should be able to find something that works for your make-out session.

PAUSE

Created by: buzz • 12 songs

SONG

FOLLOW

ARTIST

“Best Part” (feat. H.E.R.)

Daniel Caesar

“Come Away with Me”

Norah Jones

“Easy”

Mac Ayres

“Get You the Moon” (feat. Snøw)

Kina

“Honey, There’s the Door”

Haley Reinhart

“Japanese Denim”

Daniel Caesar

“Kiss Me”

Ed Sheeran

“Let’s Fall in Love for the Night”

FINNEAS

“Redbone”

Childish Gambino

“Saturday Nights”

Khalid

“She”

Harry Styles

“Slow Down”

Mac Ayres

“Talk”

Khalid

“Versace on the Floor”

Bruno Mars

Birth control “Where Were You inlow? the Morning” running

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Celebrate female friendships on Galentine’s Day

BY CAROLINA GARIBAY ASSISTANT BUZZ EDITOR

Valentine’s Day can be a controversial day, and it often causes mixed emotions among people. Couples might go out to a nice dinner or take a trip somewhere to celebrate, while those who aren’t in a relationship might either sulk at home or just not care at all about the “holiday” and go about their lives as usual.

Some people, however, may prefer to forget about Valentine’s Day and celebrate Galentine’s Day instead. Galentine’s Day is an unofficial holiday that occurs on Feb. 13 and was created as a day for women to celebrate other women. Most women celebrate Galentine’s Day by gathering with their lady friends and celebrating each other.

Some people go all out for Galentine’s Day and throw huge parties, but when you’re in college and are on a tight budget or live in a dorm, throwing an extravagant party might be a little difficult. Below are a couple of tips and tricks for throwing an awesome college Galentine’s Day get-together.

playlist full of songs that celebrate women and make you feel confident and empowered if you want your playlist to fit the theme of Galentine’s Day. You can also just create a playlist of your favorite bops that you think your guests will enjoy. You can even create a collaborative playlist so your guests can help customize the playlist and everyone’s music choices can be included.

Entertain Your Guests with Card Games and Chick Flicks

Keep Decor to a Minimum

If we’re being real, most college students don’t exactly have the time, money or energy to go buy or make fancy decorations, but this doesn’t mean that your get-together has to be completely void of decorations either.

One of the easiest ways to add some decor to wherever you’ll be holding your Galentine’s Day event is to add a photo wall. You might already have fairy lights or some type of wall decor that you can add to your photo wall, but you can also do some easy crafts, such as simply cutting out paper hearts and taping them to the wall. This way you have both No party or get-together is complete with- a fun activity and a cool wall of decorations. out music. You’ll definitely want to have a

Create a Bomb Playlist

ment, cooking something is a more doable option, and, again, you can ask your friends to contribute a dish or snack. All of this is based on personal preference and totally up to what you and your friends want to do.

AMANDA KATZ THE DAILY ILLINI

Snack During the Event

Card games are a great way to entertain your guests and get a good laugh out of each other. I recommend Cards Against Humanity and For the Girls for your Galentine’s Day get together. These are both incredibly fun games that have a bit of an edge to them, which will make for both a fun and interesting night.

Once you’ve gotten tired of playing card games, wind down a bit with a good chickflick or rom-com. What you want to watch is completely up to you and your guests, but a few movies I recommend that are available on Netflix are “Set It Up,” “About Time” and “The Spectacular Now.”

This might depend on whether you and your friends live in a dorm or in an apartment.

Cooking in the dorms can sometimes be difficult, so I recommend going out to eat with your friends before your Galentine’s Day gettogether and then asking everyone to contribute some type of snack that you can all enjoy during the event. If you’re in an apart- garibay5@readbuzz.com

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CASSIDY BRANDT THE DAILY ILLINI

Watch these movies to connect with your relationship status

and friendship over everything are revealed (Guillermo Del Toro) at the Oscars. Plus, Octa- highlights Paul’s plan for escape. The things through its perfect blend of comedy, sprin- via Spencer is in it, and who doesn’t love her? people do for love — am I right, or am I right?

It’s that time of year again, and it can either kles of romance and a little bit of conflict. If be the best or the worst. No one’s situation is you didn’t watch this movie as a kid, you didn’t the same, so here are a couple of movie sug- have a childhood. gestions to spice up your Valentine’s Day based on your relationship status.

If you’re a musical buff like I was as a kid, chances are you spent a substantial amount of This film adaption of one of Stephen King’s time watching “West Side Story.” This “modIf you asked anyone in 2017 what the plot of iconic novels still chills horror fans to this day ern” version of Romeo and Juliet follows an “The Shape of Water” was, they’d say it was since its release in 1990. James Caan plays Paul interracial couple and the adversities they face From the title, you can probably guess that about a woman falling in love with a fish-dude. Sheldon, a Victorian romance novelist who gets in the slums of 1950s New York City. Is there this movie is about soccer or “football” as it’s First of all, he was an amphibian, which is not a injured after his car crashes in rural Colorado any better way to convey racial tension and known in its native country. Jess, a British fish. Secondly, the plot isn’t as simple as that. during a snow blizzard. Kathy Bates’s charac- gang rivalry other than through singing and teen, is faced with the conundrum of choos- A laboratory worker, played by Sally Hawkins, ter, Annie Wilkes, takes him in, helps him regain dancing? Jokes aside, the song performances ing between living a regular life or pursuing discovers a classified government experiment his strength, and supplies him with materials are chilling, especially Tony and Maria’s duet her dreams of playing professional soccer in 1962, which turns out to be the amphibian to help him write his next novel. Progressively of “Somewhere.” You’ll probably come out of like David Beckham. Jess also comes from a man. It’s true that the movie tells a story about throughout the film, it’s revealed that Annie is it with three messages if it’s your first-time conservative Indian family that doesn’t think an unconventional instance of love; however, an obsessive fan. How obsessive, you may ask? watching: Natalie Wood was taken from us way women should play sports, which makes her it does so in a touching and whimsical way. It When Paul eventually gets better, she ties him too soon, the ending is not what you expected decision even more difficult to make. Despite must’ve done something right, as the movie to her bed and breaks his legs again so he can’t and racism is stupid. its somewhat dark subject matter, the movie gained lots of recognition from award ceremo- leave her. Despite Annie’s hope of Paul developis really funny. The themes of family values nies. It even won Best Picture and Best Director ing Stockholm syndrome, the rest of the movie jel3@readbuzz.com

BY JILLIAN LITTLE

ASSISTANT BUZZ EDITOR

Single: “Bend It Like Beckham”

In a Relationship: “The Shape of Water”

Falling in Love with Someone You Can’t Have: “Misery”

It’s Complicated: “West Side Story”

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Monday, February 10, 2020

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Let’s talk about how to fix the orgasm gap

BY PAIGE LEDEN ASSISTANT DAYTIME NEWS EDITOR

When I was about 16 years old, my mom told me that when I start having sex, it should not be just about the guy; I should enjoy it, too.

Strange thing to say your teenage daughter about sex? Maybe. But she had a point. On average, heterosexual women orgasm far less frequently than heterosexual men. Bisexual women only orgasm a smidge more frequently, and overall, no matter the sexual orientation of the couple, men just climax more. Not to say sex isn’t enjoyable without getting off, but the “orgasm gap” is very real. Since we are in an age of equality, shouldn’t orgasms also be included?

There’s a lot of reasons for this gap, from social stigma to there being little scientifically known about the female orgasm. But when it comes down to it, ladies, you deserve to have an orgasm and you shouldn’t be afraid to say you want one.

Ok, but how? You might be a little nervous or unsure how to approach that topic, whether it be with your longtime partner or maybe someone new. But here’s the thing: Your partner probably wants you to climax just as much as you do. And if they don’t, you should probably ditch them. Sorry, not sorry. Ladies, it’s time you start getting “The Big O” just as much as the guys.

I don’t know what makes me climax!

Hey, that’s fine! It’s also a great opportunity to start some exploration, whether it be by yourself or with a partner. I’m not here to tell you how to masturbate, but this is the best and easiest way to figure out what your body likes, and exploring new things can be fun. If you’re nervous about trying new things with your partner, masturbation is a great warmup! Whether it be by yourself or maybe with a new toy, this is a great starting point for someone who hasn’t had a lot of experience with sexual pleasure, with or without a partner.

There’s advice all over the web with tips on how to explore your own body!

I’ve faked it too much to go back now

Okay, this is tricky but redeemable. How do I know? Because I have been there. Saying you know you’re not gonna get there is just about as embarrassing as asking for an orgasm. For the record, none of this should make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable — I want to be real with you here. So, point being, even though you have faked it before, it’s never too late to be honest with your partner. That classic line of “it’s not you, it’s me?” I pulled that,

KAITLIN MIKRUT THE DAILY ILLINI

and it helped, knowing he didn’t necessarily do anything wrong, but it’s something we need to work on. Your partner might get mad or upset and feel bad, and that’s okay. The point is, now you both know and now you can get busy and start getting to that climax you deserve. And when your partner finally helps you achieve the Big O? Any hard feelings will be replaced with immense satisfaction.

I want to bring toys into the bedroom, but how?

I’m gonna get a bit personal here guys. I have major trouble climaxing without some help, and its never the guy’s fault. They do everything right, it’s good, it’s fun. So, one day, I thought, maybe I ought to try something new here. It took forever for me to actually bring up the idea to my partner, but once I did? No big deal! There’s this weird notion

that guys will feel emasculated about needing toys in the bedroom, and those guys need to get over themselves. There is a reason they’re called sex toys, not masturbation toys. And boys, you’d be surprised how well a sex toy can brighten up your sex life as well. If your partner is having a great time, it’ll be so much easier for you too.

I physically cannot achieve an orgasm

if you don’t “get there.” But please, do not fake an orgasm if this is something you deal with. You’re not doing either of you any favors.

Take it out with your partner and remember, communicating your wants and needs is key.

Probably the most important thing about asking for and getting an orgasm, however, is losing the stigma that women shouldn’t ask for one. Women love sex too, folks. Talk about orgasms with your friends, boys and girls and nonbinary alike. People are talking about sex casually more and more, and while it is obviously important to talk about safe sex, orgasms deserve to be a part of the conversation too.

So tell your friends and family to use condoms and never be afraid to ask for what you want in the bedroom. Conversations around this topic might take time, but if we keep talking about it, eventually the orgasm gap will be one less thing women have to fight against.

There are people out there who cannot orgasm, or it’s next to impossible for them to “cross the finish line.” There is nothing wrong with that. A person could have mental blocks, or a physical issue, and even certain medications such as anti-depressants can cause this.

So, how do you know when you’re “satisfied?”

Well, that’s a case-by-case basis. You can have fun with sex and end up totally satisfied even pleden2@readbuzz.com

Monday, February 10, 2020

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The Daily Illini

How to plan a happy Anti-Valentine’s Day

BY RUKAYAH HUSSEIN STAFF WRITER

Some of you may be excited for the holiday (if you can call it that; I mean, we don’t even get the day off) and are currently in the midst of making extravagant plans with either your significant other or friends filled with heartshaped merchandise, rose bouquets and tons of chocolate sweets. The rest of you, like myself, scowl at the grocery stores who jump ahead and dedicate entire aisles to Valentine’s Day when it was only the day after New Year’s.

If you can relate, then this Anti-Valentine’s Day guide is for you.

There are many reasons for disliking Valentine’s Day, so whatever your attitude is on the matter, you are definitely not alone. You can be in a perfectly happy relationship with someone and not want to celebrate Valentine’s Day, or maybe you have been hopelessly single for ages and do not appreciate a holiday meant to celebrate romantic love. Maybe you think it is just another capitalist holiday to get you to buy unnecessary items. Regardless of your reasons, there are plenty of ways to celebrate an Anti-Valentine’s Day.

Pig out at home in your comfy clothes

This year, Valentine’s Day happens to fall on a Friday. It is convenient for couples who want to make dinner reservations at Champaign or Urbana’s best and most elegant restaurants, such as Naya on Green Street or KoFusion in downtown Champaign. As a guideline, you want to avoid those places at all costs or else be subjected to couples galavanting on their merry date-night and enjoying overpriced food. However, you should not go home without something to eat, so why not call upon a few friends and pig out? Order multiple pizzas loaded with every topping you desire and have an Anti-Valentine’s Day pizza party. Or if you are on your own for the night, eat an entire pizza yourself. Seriously. Don’t forget to eat in the most unsophisticated manner possible, in your sweats preferably.

MARK CAPAPAS THE DAILY ILLINI

Treat yourself to a night out on the town

Now that your meal is all set, it’s time for some fun. If your reason for hating Valentine’s Day involves an ex, sell their stuff on eBay and use the profits to buy yourself something nice or even to go out on the town.

Take your closest friends (or just other AntiValentine’s Day conspirators) and stop by KAM’s to party. If you prefer to dance it out at home, that’s cool, too. Just don’t forget the single-people’s jams

Top: A student on Green Street asks about the price of flowers from a vendor on Valentine’s Day 2019. This year, Valentine’s Day falls on Friday, perfect for any type of celebration plans.

Bottom: Two people embrace each other on Green Street as the flower vendor fills a bouquet on Valentine’s Day 2019.

Indulge in a relaxing weekend

If you want your evening to be a bit quieter since you have probably had a long week, have a movie and self-care night. Let’s be real; the best way to avoid the drama of Valentine’s Day is to stay home. Whether you have guests or it’s just you, bake a batch of brownies, throw on a face mask and put on a movie. Whether its action, horror or even a documentary, Netflix is your

savior tonight. No matter what though, avoid with plenty of crossed-out hearts and black rosany romantic comedies. es. Make a statement, and actively display your hate for the holiday on social media. And go ahead, subtweet your ex on Twitter.

Valentine’s Day goers might find us bitter, or even downers. Show them you are having fun without the trappings of the day, even in the most Sometimes, however, you want to be a bit simple ways. If all else fails, get your hands on all naughty and become the ultimate Grinch of Val- the discounted candy the next day. entine’s Day. Decorate your dorm or apartment with the most snarky Anti-Valentine’s Day decor, rukayah2@readbuzz.com

Decorate your place to reflect the mood

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