MY CORNER OF THE CANYON Kinfolk (Dedicated to Uncle Bud)

By Kathie Gibboney

“I’ve already got six grandchildren and y’all don’t have any? What’s wrong with you California people?” asks my Cousin Sandy from Texas. “And your son’s 30 and not even fixin’ to marry his girlfriend? How long they”ve been together, seven years?”

I try to explain that many young people, Millennials and Generation Zs are not having children, at least not for now, and that a wedding doesn’t hold the milestone caché it once did.

This difference in the matter of prodigious procreation is one of the divides between us, although I must admit to a slight pang when I see cute baby clothes. Another of our disconnect is, of course, POLITICS. A subject we agree not to touch upon. Cousin Sandy is coming to attend the memorial of our Swingin’ Uncle Bud. I’m picking her up at the airport. Being, shall we say, challenged behind the wheel, I announce, “This is something I would only do for you.” I don’t warn her of impending calamity.

Cousin Sandy is a big-hearted, friendly, opinionated pistol of a Texas gal who has been married four times and might not be averse to number five, God help him. And I can’t help but love her as I did her mother. Sandy and her lovely, successful daughter and family have visited before and all went well enough, including the requisite visits to Universal Studios, Hollywood Boulevard, Rodeo Drive, Venice Boardwalk, Malibu, and even a spin past Hef’s Playboy Mansion. The Beleaguered Husband and I are nothing if not gracious hosts.

Naturally the airport is a disaster, the sun blinds my eyes so I can’t read any of the signage. I have to negotiate the crowded loop over and over again like a bad dream, trying to connect on cell phone and muttering aloud things like, “Now what?” “Please, bus, let me over.” and “Dear God where is she???” Finally, as if a miracle, I see her; bright red, long hair, gleaming like a spitfire angel.

I’m about to congratulate myself. Mission Accomplished. But upon exiting the airport I take a wrong turn and we’re lost in a sketchy part of town. Sandy’s GPS guides us home but by the time we finally get to Topanga I feel as if we’ve passed through some great trial together.

Uncle Bud received a fine send-off. We had a chance to get reacquainted with his children and their families. Sandy wore cowboy boots. A moving playing of “Taps” was followed appropriately by Sinatra’s, “I Did It My Way.” We all went to lunch after and judging by the cars driven by our cousins, identified by my envious and Beleaguered Husband as a Lamborghini Urus and an Audi R8 racing car, it was obvious as my brother and I concurred, some Gibboneys have done better than others.

Over the week of Sandy’s visit, in addition to her long rainbowcolored nails, a fondness for frozen margaritas and a tendency to become queasy on our winding Topanga roads, I note something else. It might be a Texas “thang” but she will talk to anyone, especially if they have a dog. She shares that she’s from Texas and proudly speaks of her daughter and announces how many grandchildren she has, even listing their ages and months they were born. She explains that we’re cousins and that her mother was my father’s youngest sister from Pennsylvania. I wonder if this might be more information then needs to be shared but I see people seem intrigued. Sandy and a stranger at the mall stand talking for a good twenty minutes about their love lives then exchange cell phone numbers and the young lady thanks my cousin for talking to her just when she needed someone. The woman she sat next to on the plane has become a dear friend.

Also, Cousin Sandy has no compulsion about walking right into the Gucci store, a place I’ve never even entered, and asking the bemused salesman, “Well what’s the least expensive item y’all sell?” I admire her candor, gumption, and trust in humanity. Wish I had filmed it.

We take Sandy to Ventura to join our son and his charming, artistic girlfriend for lunch. Cousin Sandy is delighted with Riley and Karen and graciously invites them to visit Texas to which they favorably reply, “We”d love to!” being far from the answer she got when inviting us. I believe Michael’s response to her kind invitation to come to Texas was, “Ain”t gonna happen.”

Toward the end of the lunch, my son nonchalantly hands me a large envelope that evidently comes from a photo shop. I assume it’s a cute picture of their dachshund, whom I consider as close as I’ll get to a grandchild. As I open the packet and begin to pull up the photo I am taken by surprise.

I am stunned and overwhelmed. I am elated and excited. I sit frozen in a euphoric state, just staring at what I am holding. There in my hands is an ultra-scan of a baby in utero. I can only say, “Really???” My son is proudly beaming across the table at me and Sandy seeing the photo, asks,

“Are y”all pregnant?”

I pull out the complete photo in wonder and then see printed across the bottom,

‘April Fools!”

A dozen different feelings baffle and bombard me at once, yet as the great joy of thinking a little one was coming dissipates, I start to laugh. Once, I told a young Riley and little Miranda that they were going to have a baby brother or sister. My daughter seemed to think it fine, but Riley scowled and pronounced, “No! We don’t want that! We’re the children!”

Soon Miranda also said, “We don”t want that.” Then began to cry.

“April Fools!” I told them.

I guess my son has gotten even with me but I’m glad Cousin Sandy was there to share my almost Grandmotherhood. Maybe someday.

In the meantime, our house seems a bit empty without Sandy’s presence. One can appreciate a blood connection shared by relatives, something that bridges divides and effects an open smile. I’ve heard Sandy has tamed the length of her rainbow nails and even has a new hairdo, as per my suggestions.

Now I’ll have to work on her politics.

Ongoing Bible Study every Sunday with Michelle Klein , 10:00 a.m. Topanga Christian Fellowship, 269 Old Topanga Canyon Road. Service with Pastor John Klein follows at 11 a.m.

Ongoing. Little Free Library

“Spring Awakening” at Entrada Road Neighborhood. The Little Free Library Foundation is an International non-profit with a vision to “build community, inspire readers, and expand book access” and provide opportunities for reading to neighborhoods, underserved communities, and rural communities.

The books are free with a caveat: “Take a book, leave a book”, to encourage a sharing of ideas and love of books and dreams. There is a donation box under the LFL lounge bench to donate books or leave a not. For information and a map locating other LFLs in Topanga: littlefreelibrary.org; or katcalls@aol.com

Artist Matter Gallery presents “The Last Supper” and Topanga themes by ceramist Mervat Elias

An ongoing exhibition through April 30, especially for ceramics lovers! A portion of sales profits will be donated to your favorite school! The gallery is located at 139 Topanga Canyon Blvd. in the Topanga Creek Courtyard (next to Corazon Performing Arts).

Hours are: Daily 3-6 p.m. For more information or appointments, call or text (559) 586-1082. Follow on Instagram: #mervatelias

Sunday, April 30th, Adult & Pediatric First Aid / Cpr / Aed-Bl Training at Topanga Community Center . The 2021 Adult and Pediatric First Aid/CPR/AED blended learning course equips students to recognize and care for a variety of first aid breathing and cardiac emergencies involving adults children and infants.

Anyone 10+ is welcome to enroll and take the course. Certification lasts for two years. Two sessions are offered: 10 a.m.12 p.m., and 12:30-2:30 p.m. ( Topangacommunitycenter.org

Saturday & Sunday, sixth annual “Up the Drone” festival begins at 5 p.m on May 6 to 7 p.m. on May 7. This two-day festival is a 27-hour ongoing ambient sound bath featuring 27 different artists— poets, musicians, silk screenings and merchandise created by other creative spirits—performing at Corazon Performing Arts, in honor of Corazon’s Eighth Anniversary. Organized by artist and native Topangan James Mathers.

Tuesday, May 9, four-week “Jewpernatural” course with Rabbi Mendy Piekarski . Judaism’s answers regarding paranormal beliefs from the Jewish Learning Institute that unearths the Jewish perspective on dreams, astrology, spirits, demons, ghosts and other enduring mysteries. Chabad of Topanga, 1459 Old Topanga Canyon Road, Topanga, CA 90290. For information and times contact Rabbi Mendy Piekarski at (310) 455-1597 or RabbiMendyPiekarski@gmail.com that you know and live in and write your own origin story through journal prompts and sharing. $40 includes the Paradise Realm journal; $25 if you bring your own journal. Event takes place outdoors at a private home in Topanga. To sign up: paradiserealm.org/shop ; or email Sarahsupernve@hotmail.com

Sunday, May 14, Annual MOMentum Place, Brunch 12-1:30 ($30), Performance, 2 p.m. Celebrate mothers and love for one another at the annual Mother’s Day extravaganza when Theatricum’s main stage hosts the circus and aerialists fly through the air, dancers embody music and jugglers, contortionists and special surprises create spectacles beyond imagination. Buy tickets now ($15-$40)! Theatricum.com/momentum-place.

May 10, 2-3 p.m., Embrace of the Wild. Meet Topanga author, Linda Ballou, who will share insights into her widely acclaimed historical novel inspired by the indomitable, Victorian Age explorer, Isabella Bird. Linda was honored to be selected as the “Isabella Bird Expert” in the BBC docuseries,Trailblazers, spotlighting women who have paved the way to female empowerment. In the Sage room at the Topanga Community Center, 1440 Topanga Canyon Blvd., Topanga, CA 90290.

Friday, May 12, 7 p.m. Santa Monica Amateur Astronomy Club . Dr. Seth Shostak, Senior Astronomer at the SETI Institute in Mountain View and Director of the Institute’s Center for SETI Research, will present “Science Searches for the Extraterrestrials.” For information: samoastronomy. org; samoastronomy@gmail.com ; (310) 890-9495. Founded in 1981, the club is open to all and holds monthly talks the second Friday of the month at the Wildwood School, 11811 Olympic Blvd. Attendance free. Membership $30/year.

Saturday, May 13, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., In-Person Journaling Workshop with Sarah Irani . For a creative boost, walk in the Paradise Realm

Saturday, May 14, Kidiwische Corner workshop . Mother’s Day coiled yarn baskets with Kat High. For information and location: KatCalls@aol.com

Sunday, May 21, Kidiwische Corner workshop. Spirit vessel gourds with Nadiya Littlewarrior. For information and location: KatCalls@ aol.com.

May 23, 7 p.m., Free Special Guest Lecture, “The Remarkable History & Uncertain Future of Abalone.” The Pacific Palisades Historical Society hosts Independent scholar and award-winning author Ann Vileisis Talks about California’s iconic shellfish. Theater Palisades, 941 Temescal Canyon Road, Pacific Palisades, CA 90272. RSVP: info@ pacificpalisadeshistory.org

May 27-29, 10 a.m.-7 p.m., 48th Annual Topanga Days. Tickets available now online only. For information on sponsorships and volunteer opportunities: Topangacommunitycenter.org . For tickets: topangadays.com/tickets The Topanga Community Center is located at 1440 N.Topanga Canyon Blvd, Topanga. CA 90290.