The West University Buzz - May 2019

Grace and Alex Butler

Learning Improv Restaurant Noise Getting Into College Cooking for Mom

Like Father, Like Daughter

by Annie Blaylock McQueen

The Giving Tree The Quiet Before the Stan Caring for Baby – and Planet Mexico: Beyond the Beach Chef’s Corner: Felipe Riccio

Houston, TX

Mid-Year Motivational Quotes

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Buzz Baby: Staycationing

AND

JEFFREY RILEY JAMES WATERS

Having the means to live well shouldnʼt mean having too little time to do so.

EDITOR’S NOTE Recently I was visiting my mom and, in her building’s lobby, bumped into an adorable young man. I knew exactly who he must be, even though we had never met. ”Are you Sharon’s son?” I asked.

It turns out I was not the only one who noticed how much he looked like his mom. The timing was perfect because we just happened to be looking for family members who resemble one another for Annie Blaylock McQueen’s story in this issue. See if you agree that these family pairs are the spittin’ image of one another. When it comes to family resemblances, I do not hear that often about my own mom. She loves to dress up and is always in full makeup by 7 a.m. I am not. But one thing we have in common is our love of storytelling. Boy, does she have some doozies. And so do I. But it wasn’t until recently that we started sharing some of them with each other. I came clean on a few not-so-proud-daughter moments, and she told me some oh-I-can’t-believe-my-mom-did-that moments.

Sorry I can’t share details here, but be sure to check out Andria Frankfort’s Back Porch this month for more tell-all stories. joni@thebuzzmagazines.com

THE BUZZ MAGAZINES BELLAIRE • WEST UNIVERSITY • MEMORIAL • TANGLEWOOD/RIVER OAKS Published by Hoffman Marketing & Media, LLC 5001 Bissonnet, Suite 100, Bellaire, Texas 77401 info@thebuzzmagazines.com • p: 713.668.4157 • f: 713.665.2940 Follow us on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter thebuzzmagazines.com

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Joni Hoffman Michael Hoffman Cheryl Laird Jordan Magaziner Steinfeld Pooja Salhotra John Duboise Tracy L. Barnett Deborah Lynn Blumberg Sharon Albert Brier Andria Frankfort Angie Frederickson Todd Freed Cindy Gabriel Cathy Gordon Michelle Casas Groogan Dai Huynh Annie Blaylock McQueen Jennifer Oakley Cheryl Ursin Russell Weil Kolbi Blanchette Andrea Blitzer, Stephanie Goldfield Leslie Little, Jo Rogers

On our cover: Father and daughter Alex and Grace Butler look a lot alike, especially if Grace puts on glasses like the kind her dad wears.

Cover photo by Nikky LaWell, lawellphoto.com

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MAILBAG

Your letters, thoughts, opinions Coping with addiction, together I enjoyed the story [Intervening on Addiction, by Cheryl Ursin, April 2019] but want to add the tremendous value of participating in Al-Anon, a fellowship of individuals who cope with the problems of addiction in a loved one or friend. This group, founded by the wife of Bill Wilson, founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, is free, anonymous and able to provide support and the benefit of our experience to those suffering the trauma associated with addiction. The website of the local chapter is houstonalanon.org.

Thank you again for bringing this article to the local public attention. It’s far more common than any of us imagine.

A grateful Al-Anon member

Passover traditions My family has always made our gefilte fish from scratch [Friendship – and Fish: Four decades of Passover prep, by Russell Weil, April 2019]. My grandmother, Fay Rosenthal, along with Irene (until she retired), and now my Aunt Marlene and Hayley, my sister. My aunt also gets the fish from J&R Seafood Market, but for a few years my husband would catch it! Now, J&R grinds the fish, but I do remember the fish/meat grinder that my grandmother and Irene used. It would latch onto the table, at the house on Grennoch, and they would grind the fish into the bucket. I would like to forget seeing those eyes (gross), and that part thankfully is now eliminated!

They now make the gefilte fish at my mom's house, and the smell is the beginning of the holiday preparation. This is a part of what makes our Seder so special, and I'm hoping that my daughter will learn how to make the fish and continue our family tradition.

Bonnie G. Winograd

A big yes for inclusive rodeo Easter Seals Houston is always so appreciative of the support of The Buzz Magazines and in general for the support of the disability community as a whole. Michelle did such a great story covering our committee [Rodeo for All, by Michelle Casas Groogan, March 2019] – all of our committee was excited to see it! Thank you for everything you do!

Kelly N. Klein, Development Director, Easter Seals Greater Houston

Fan of Back Porch Table I’ve been meaning to let you know that I made your Mexican Chicken recipe [Back Porch Table, Buzzworthy blog, by Andria Frankfort] – so yummy! I've made it once per the recipe, and then I made just the chicken part and made tacos with it. So good! Next up are the chocolate chip cookies with the vanilla pudding. Thanks for sharing such yummy recipes!

Michele Carlin Editor’s note: Every Friday, Andria Frankfort shares recipes for weekend entertaining (or anytime) on our Back Porch Table blog. See thebuzzmagazines.com/back-porch-table.

Send letters to info@thebuzzmagazines.com. Please include your name, address, phone number and email address for verification purposes. Letters are subject to editing for clarity and space. Views expressed in letters do not necessarily reflect the opinions of The Buzz Magazines, and The Buzz takes no responsibility for the content and opinions expressed in them.

Katie O’Sullivan is a star Just enjoyed reading your article about Katie O’Sullivan [A Storied Life: Katie O’Sullivan – the first 93 years, by Andria Frankfort, April 2019] this morning. What a terrific life she has had and still going strong at 93! She is a beautiful lady both inside and out…. Please let Katie know that she is gorgeous and very much a lady and a terrific role model. There aren’t many ladies like Katie. Ok, crazy comment . . . she puts me in mind of a movie about her life . . . starring Katie, no need for a glamorous movie star!

Anonymous

Story captured young artist Sevy Angie, amazing article [Speaking Through Art: Sevy Eicher's unfolding talent, by Angie Frederickson, March 2019]. We loved it so much, and everyone has been calling and texting about how great it was. It can be scary to be vulnerable and have someone else put your story out there, but you couldn’t have captured our family better. We so appreciate your attention to the “little things” that are such a big part of who we are. We enjoyed working with you all. Thanks again for making this a great experience!

Lisa Eicher WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 6

What’s your story?

We are looking for residents for upcoming articles who: • Have retro collectibles, such as classic video games.

• Are passionate about being “green” or love to garden.

• Have compelling back-to-school traditions.

• Have interesting travel stories.

• Know a Buzzworthy neighbor to profile.

If this sounds like you or someone you know, please contact us at info@thebuzzmagazines.com or 713.668.4157, ext 12.

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NEIGHBORS

by Andria Frankfort, staff writer

Mid-Year Motivation Favorite quotes and mantras

S

ometimes we all need a little motivation (like during the last stretch of the school year, aka “May Madness”). Here, Buzz neighbors share their favorite inspirational sayings. Onward!

“Relationships aren’t made in the microwave.”

Sandy Sales, who has three grown children, heard this quote while watching The Bachelor.

“One of the dads was telling his daughter that he couldn’t give the bachelor his blessing to marry his daughter. The dad explained to his daughter that he had only met the boyfriend a couple of hours ago, and she had only met him six weeks ago. So he said, ‘Relationships aren’t made in the microwave.’ I love that! I wish I would have heard it years ago when my girls were younger.”

“If you’re feeling down, go out and do something nice for someone. It’ll cheer you right up!”

“I was thinking about motivational phrases,” says Samantha Sullivan, “and I immediately thought of my great-grandmother, Marie Catherine Lemee, who everyone in the family called Momee. She was a wise little French lady from Natchitoches, Louisiana, and though she died before I was born, her words of wisdom filtered down to us through my mother and grandmother. I repeat them to my daughter regularly.”

She also said, “Don’t worry about what others think. They’re not thinking about you anyway because they’re too busy thinking about themselves!” and “A year from now, none of this will matter.”

“Ask for the sale!”

Mother of three and proprietor of Cottage288, a clothing boutique in her home, Anita Gaylor describes herself as “an inherent salesgirl and positive thinker.” She says, “When my kids really want something, like a hard-to-get class, a special internship, a dream job, and they’ve done everything they think they can do, they will sit back and wait for others to control the situation. I tell them to, ‘Ask for the sale!’ Ask that professor, potential boss, whoever, for what you want.

Explain what you bring to the table and why you should get what you are asking for.”

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”

Keith Rassin, an adjunct professor in the entrepreneurship program at the University of Houston and co-founder of the water-conservaWEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 8

LIFELONG INSPIRATION Dr. Morton Adels, who passed away several years ago, lives on in his daughters’ hearts and in the many inspiring sentiments he gave them. The sisters made a book of their dad's favorite quotes, including, "There is no way to happiness … happiness is the way." Here, the Adels sisters gather around their dad: (top, from left) Jill Adels Klaff, Nanci Adels Fine, Kelly Adels Hess; (bottom, from left) Dawn Adels Fine, Dr. Adels and Allison Adels.

tion company eConserve, uses this Mark Twain quote as encouragement for his students.

Another Mark Twain quote he likes: “The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the one who can’t.”

“Ouisie, Ouisie, Ouisie.”

When he gets a little stressed out, William Halverson, who is an eighth grader at Memorial Middle School, says his dog’s name over and over as a way to de-stress.

“How do you eat an elephant?”

“When taking on a big task or project, I like this question,” says Michelle Glickman, an antiques trader and mother of two teenaged boys. “The answer is, ‘One bite at a time.’ I have used this so many times with my children, friends and colleagues. It gives them a laugh at the mental image, and it also says to take things bit by bit and not get overwhelmed with the enormity of it all.”

“Ad astra per aspera.”

“I lived the first 12 years of my life in a little farm town in Southeast Kansas,” says Lana Rigsby, owner of the marketing and design firm Rigsby Hull and mother of two teenagers. “To this day, I recite the motto on the Kansas state flag to my kids when times are tough. To greatness through effort, or literally translated, ‘To the stars through sweat!’” Another one I use all the time is a Zen bit that says, “Begin with the end in mind.”

“Never sit if you can dance.”

Jo Giese used this favorite quote from her mother, Babe, as the title for a book about her.

“Do the right thing, and the right thing will happen.”

Jill Klaff, one of five sisters, made a book of quotes that remind the sisters of their father. “It is Dad’s quotes to live by, and we quote them every day to pass on to our kids!”

“Different families, different rules.”

When faced with teenager questions like, “Everyone has a cell phone except me,” or “Everyone gets to go to ACL except me,” Peggy Haney, director of advancement at Episcopal High School, reminds her children that there isn’t one set of rules for every child … or every parent.

“If you think you can, or if you think you can’t, you are right.”

Diana Brackman, a mother of three grown children and grandmother of two, reminds her family that they can do whatever they put their minds to.

“Please don’t let me yell at anyone today, please don’t let me yell at anyone today…”

Infectious disease specialist and mother of two Barbara Trautner stays focused by trying to keep her cool.

Editor’s note: To share your favorite inspirational mottos, email info@thebuzzmagazines.com or comment under this story at thebuzzmagazines.com.

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NEIGHBORS

by Cindy Gabriel, staff writer

Crickets The quiet before the Stan

L

ast month in this geriatric love saga, I told you about my five-year marriage to George, who passed away. It would take five more years of cocooning before Stan emerged.

Nobody ever says this out-loud when someone dies, but after a week of mourning George, it dawned on me that I now had the whole closet to myself. A few endorphins emerged as I settled into quiet recovery and had a discovery: Loneliness, when embraced, can turn into sweet solitude.

As a natural loner, in my early childhood, I would turn my bedroom into an entire town of Barbies and paper dolls with an elaborate plot and storyline, landscaped in crumpled covers and shoe box cars. If someone came to the door and wanted to play, I told them my mother wouldn’t let me. People in the neighborhood thought I had one mean mother. I just couldn’t bear for my plot to be interrupted by someone else’s “let’s go to the store” line. This was my sweet spot.

But the grieving wasn’t just for George. My parents and George’s parents had also departed in those five years. The me without all of them was someone I didn’t know very well. That someone was ready to explore the forbidden fruit of things I was told to believe, yet never questioned.

Now, under adult crumpled covers, with a laptop and audio books, I cocooned. Neighbors wondered where I was. I went to work, came home, went through a string of TV-series obsessions like Downton Abbey, Friday Night Lights and Breaking Bad. Thank God for the Houston Astros. The men in my life were Altuve, Correa and Springer. And, I think Candy Crush has permanently numbed my right middle finger.

My daughters kept things interesting, each finding love and marrying within six weeks of one another. But, as a dateless mother-of-the bride for both weddings, by the end of it all I felt decidedly alone.

Again alone, I watched as Harvey floodwaters turned my front yard into a fishing camp, after coaxing a young couple off the street to help me get my dining table on paint cans. My heart WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 10

ONLINE-DATING WIN Writer Cindy Gabriel with Stan-the-Man Ehrenkranz in San Miguel de Allende.

aches for you who flooded, as one who was blessedly, barely missed. I started to imagine a fictional man who likes to fix things, does my income taxes and helps me get furniture up before a storm.

It was time to write my online-dating profile.

I told myself, “You’re just looking for a date, keep it light.” The first guy I liked who actually liked me back was Stan. Yep, he was my first date. Am I lucky or just not picky?

Stan’s profile mentioned bike riding on Buffalo Bayou, The Continental Club and Mucky Duck, all within my geographic range.

That made it easy. He’s close, he’s cute, and, gulp, he’s Jewish. I had never dated a Jewish guy, but have many Jewish ties, and an emerging curiosity in all things religious. This has turned into a fascinatingly fateful twist.

He was five minutes late for our first meet-up, at a wine bar in east downtown. When he texted me that he was still doing his makeup, all was well. Sense of humor: check.

He joined me at the bar, got directly in my face and started a line of questions. I noticed that his voice could have been that of a college kid. It sounded so young, as if it chose not to age

to match his 60-something years.

He was clearly a kid at heart, and indeed he was: cute, fit and, I’m sure, a hit in the onlinedating world. We moved on to a Chinese restaurant. His questioning continued, informed by careful attention to my answers. He was a good listener.

I felt I could really fall for this guy. He’d been single about as long as I had and, like me, had a couple of grown kids who had significant others.

But unlike me, he had been dating most of those five years.

He seemed interested in me, but not bowled over. On our second date, he was giving me online-dating tips, not a good sign. He came by once to help me get something out of my attic, but then promptly left, saying his dogs were in the car. Also, not a good sign. I sensed there were others. I didn’t want to sing and dance my way through a dating pageant, so I turned down his offer to see a movie and didn’t respond to further texts. Besides, I couldn’t see Stan doing my income taxes.

I took my heart and dove back into the online world. Stay tuned for next month’s Buzz article, Uh-Oh! There’s a Pattern Here.

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NEIGHBORS

by Tracy L. Barnett, staff writer

Going Green Caring for baby – and planet

W

hen Rebecca Brownlie had her first child, she was overwhelmed, integrating details of baby care with her full-time job in finance, and so her lifelong environmental sensibilities went on the back burner.

Paradoxically, it was Baby No. 2 that made her rethink the diaper dilemma.

“I was probably like most moms; the thought of cloth nappies was too much to consider on top of everything else,” said Rebecca – who is Scottish, hence the “nappies.”

With her second child, she had both babies in diapers, and was shocked at how fast her wastebaskets were filling up. “I felt guilty for the amount of waste I was generating,” she said.

In fact, with some 30 billion disposable diapers going into North America’s landfills each year, Rebecca’s concerns are not unfounded.

And she’s not the only one thinking about the problem. Carrie Ephraim, too, was disturbed at the thought of the truckloads of trash generated by disposables. So the two mothers tackled the problem from different angles.

Rebecca invested in a set of colorful, unused nappies on eBay, and Carrie invested in a diaper service. Both say the approach is no harder than using disposables, and the cost is the same or less.

“Once I decided to make the switch, and spoke to a friend who was already using cloth nappies to get some tips, it was actually really easy,” insisted Rebecca. “To me, a cloth nappy is exactly the same as a disposable nappy except that instead of putting it in the rubbish bin I put it in a nappy bucket for the washing machine – that’s it.”

After much research, she settled on the “dry pail” method. She bought a bucket with a lid, and she sprinkles a little baking soda at the bottom to keep the odor down. She also sprinkles a few drops of lavender on a piece of cloth for extra odor control.

Cloth diapers are all the rage in Australia and New Zealand, where Rebecca lived for 11 years before moving to Houston. Here, she was surprised to find almost nobody using them.

“I get a lot of comments from other parents who say, ‘Oh, we haven’t seen these nappies before,’ and that just breaks my heart.”

Carrie, too, was concerned about the waste.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 12

ECOMOM Rebecca Brownlie uses colorful cloth diapers with her third child, Imogen. On the right are some of her cloth wipes, which she keeps in a lidded box with water and lavender oil. Dirty wipes go into a different box with water and tea tree oil drops as an antiseptic.

“When you start to have kids, you start rethinking all your values,” she said. “You think about what they’re going to be left with at the end of the day.”

Carrie found out about Dry Baby Cloth Diaper Service through her doula. She was delighted to find out that such a service existed; still, she was apprehensive about the messiness.

When her doula explained that a diaper service would take care of that, she gave them a call.

They sent a specialist to give her a tutorial before the baby came.

“They just make it really, really simple – essentially you buy these rubber diaper covers, you change them every couple hours, you put them in the diaper pail, you drop it off outside your door, and new diapers appear, then rinse and repeat.

Easy-peasy, done.” She doesn’t have to empty the diaper or pre-rinse. The only time she tosses anything into the toilet is later on, on occasion, when a toddler is older and nearing potty training.

There’s another reason Carrie prefers the cloth diapers: in her view, they are the safer,

healthier option. “I had eczema growing up as a kid that was severe, and I had to be on steroid medication. My husband has sensitive skin, and my mom has autoimmune disorders. So it was important to me to start my children off on the best foot possible,” she said. “When I was looking at disposable diapers, there were a lot of different chemicals I wasn’t comfortable putting on my child’s skin, especially being a newborn.”

Carrie just had her second child and is again using Dry Baby. Rebecca now has her third child, who is using the same cloth nappies, and she now uses cloth baby wipes (Cheeky Wipes). But if less waste and less chemicals aren’t enough to convince parents to move to cloth, then perhaps the financial savings will. “I have saved about $1K a year by moving from disposable to cloth nappies,” said Rebecca, “which is always a bonus!”

Editor’s note: Buzz sustainable-living columnist Tracy L. Barnett is an award-winning freelance writer covering travel, the environment and social justice issues in the Americas.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 13

lawellphoto.com

NEIGHBORS

by Jennifer Oakley, staff writer

The Giving Tree Growing alongside its boy

W

hen Brantley Payne graduated from St. Martin’s Episcopal Preschool nine years ago, he was given a tree.

At the time, it was the school’s tradition to give all students who completed pre-kindergarten a copy of The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein along with their very own tree. At the graduation ceremony, 5-year-old Brantley towered over his tiny sapling, which had just seven leaves and a sliver of a trunk. It looked more like a twig.

What a difference almost a decade makes.

Today, Brantley is about to walk across the stage at yet another graduation ceremony. At the end of May he will complete eighth grade at St. John’s School and look forward to moving into Upper School next fall. In the nine years since he got his tree, the blonde and athletic boy has grown into a tall teenager. And his tree has grown into a stately oak.

“It was so small when I got it, I could carry it in its pot,” says Brantley, who will turn 15 in August.

"And now, I look out my window and see it from the second story of our house. When I look outside, I wonder: how in the heck did it get this big?”

That’s the question all parents ask when they look at their children. How do you measure the passage of time? In the case of the Payne family, it is via Brantley’s Giving Tree.

Mary Majors Payne says she is proud of their intellectually curious son, who has a range of interests, from playing viola to being a lacrosse goalie.

Brantley says he has loved school and reading, ever since that first pre-K graduation. “I am looking forward to high school for the programs in sports and the orchestra,” he says. “I am excited to be taking math and higher level courses next year, and I am excited about the engineering program.”

Mary Majors and her husband, attorney Leslie Payne, who also have a St. John’s School sixth grader named Carlton, marvel at the growth of their firstborn and his tree. “It’s a total reflection of Brantley and how big he has gotten,” says Mary Majors. “Because the tree goes through cycles, it makes us pay attention. It shows the seasons just like we have the seasons of our lives.”

“In the winter, we see it without its leaves; then in spring it grows its leaves and it is so pretty,” says Brantley. “I wonder how deep the roots WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 14

BRANCHING OUT Next to his oak, Brantley Payne holds a copy of Shel Silverstein’s The Giving Tree. Both the book and the tree were gifts from St. Martin’s Episcopal Preschool nine years ago. The tree was so small at the time, it looked like a twig.

go and how much of an impact it has had on everything around it.” Mary Majors points out that their neighbors have been impacted by the beauty of the tree. “One neighbor called us in the fall and said, ‘Have you seen Brantley’s tree today?’” she says. “Right before it loses its leaves it’s all red and just beautiful.”

Mary Majors says they did not do anything special when they planted the tiny tree in their front yard. “We did not do any research, we just dug a hole, put it in and watered it and walked away,” says Mary Majors, a civic volunteer. “We only wanted to have a place for it to get sunlight.

We had to find a spot for the little tree to survive.” Turns out, their location was just right for Brantley’s tree to not just survive, but thrive.

The Paynes made it a family project and they all

took turns watering the tree.

“I feel like a tree growing is very representative of a child growing,” says Mary Majors, who starts every school year out by taking a photo of Brantley in front of his tree. “The speed from which it grows from a sapling to the speed a child grows is similar. Every year when I take that photo of Brantley with his tree, I think, ‘It’s going too fast.’ This tree will be here long after Brantley goes to college. It will remind me of him. I am working on raising a gentleman, and I am proud of the person and the leader he has become.”

Brantley, too, sees his reflection in his tree. “I have grown with my tree,” he says. “Eventually the tree will keep growing even when I have stopped growing. The tree will be here even when I am not here. It represents me.”

NEIGHBORS

by Annie Blaylock McQueen, staff writer

Carbon Copies lawellphoto.com

Family-member lookalikes

THREE GENERATIONS Philip Grosman, his mother Sharon Grosman and Philip’s daughter Sophie are unmistakably related when they’re side-by-side.

I

t’s typical for relatives to look alike. But sometimes the resemblance goes beyond a basic likeness. Sometimes, even despite age differences, you think you are seeing double.

Recently, some Buzz residents shared what it’s like to look almost identical to a family member.

Longtime Bellaire-area resident Sharon Grosman hears all the time about the striking resemblance between her and one of her four sons, Philip. Sure, she looks like her other three sons, too, but Philip is like her clone. Both are involved in the community and know a lot of the same people, but when they encounter someone only one knows, that person knows instantly that they’re related.

“I think it’s our dark skin, dark eyes and round face,” she says. But there’s more to it than just having similar features – they also share personWEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 16

ality traits and outgoing mannerisms that, along with their appearance, make it look like someone just copied and pasted the two.

Their eyes are prominent features on their faces – round like apples and dark brown like coffee. “Our fingers and hands even look alike,” she said. Only difference? “I am shorter,” said Sharon.

Philip, who works for the family’s welding company, said, “I get asked all the time. ‘Are you Sharon Grosman's son?’ ‘Are you a Grosman?’”

Philip and his wife of 15 years, Dana, and their children, Sophie, Matthew and Ellie, are active members at Congregation Beth Yeshurun and The Bellaire Jewish Center. “Random people will come up to me and ask. I always get a kick out of it,” said Philip. “They always say I'm a spitting image of my mom.

The observation is a conversational icebreaker. “People act shocked by the resemblance. I sometimes cut them off mid-sentence and say, ‘Yes, I'm Sharon's son,’” he said, laughing.

The carbon copying is continuing with Philip’s daughter, Sophie, 12. Sophie bears a strong resemblance to them, with the deep dark eyes and olive skin.

Mother-daughter duo Elizabeth and Laura Stein know all about family doppelgängers.

“Everyone just always knows when they meet me, that I am Alan and Elizabeth’s daughter,” said Laura, deputy controller for the Houston Professional Fire Fighters Association and charitable foundation. She works closely with her mom, who volunteers for the organization and chaired the gala last year.

“My mother and I share (continued on page 18)

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 17

lawellphoto.com lawellphoto.com

Aelish Lascoe

lawellphoto.com Aelish Lascoe

LOOKS LIKE Top row, from left: Mother and daughter Joyce Fadem and Stephanie Wise, Grace Butler and dad Alex Butler; bottom row, from left: Evelyn de Groot and mother Ellee de Groot, Jeff de Groot and dad John de Groot, and Laura Stein and mother Elizabeth Stein. (continued from page 16) a lot of mannerisms and

always make the same expressions.” She says it’s their blue eyes, light brown hair and the slight turn upwards of their lips when they smile. They even share a name (Laura’s middle name is Elizabeth). Both are outgoing and have magnetic bright smiles.

The de Groot family has a double mirror effect going on. Ellee and her husband John, who were high school sweethearts in Galveston, have a daughter and a son. Evelyn, 20, resembles Ellee, and son Jeff, 18, resembles John.

Ellee and Evelyn have the same textured, curly hair. Jeff and John’s faces are both ovalshaped, and both wear glasses, adding to the similarity. They have the same soft smiles.

“When people who knew us from high school WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 18

see them, they say, ‘Okay, which is which?’” said Ellee, laughing.

Alex Butler, a professor of finance at Rice University, bears a strong resemblance to his 13year-old daughter, Grace. The “Butler look,” a big smile with dark eyes, was passed down from his late father, Mike Butler. “I can’t really put my finger on [why] we look so much alike,” said Alex. But do they ever.

Alex and Grace, who enjoy fly fishing together, have figured out how to look even more alike, just for kicks. Grace, who does not wear prescription glasses, likes to pick up a pair and put them on when standing next to her father, who wears glasses.

Alex says both their girls also strongly resemble their mom. “If Catherine and Grace have

their hair back in a ponytail, walking from behind they look just like their mother,” he said.

Stephanie Wise, who has three boys, has always been told that she looks just like her mother, Joyce Fadem, even though Stephanie is a lot shorter. The pair have the same noses, cheeks, smile and large medium-brown eyes.

“I feel like it’s always in elevators,” said Stephanie, laughing. “Most of my memories of it are waiting for elevators, riding in elevators.

Maybe the other person is bored and doesn’t have anything else to think about.”

Editor’s note: Do you have lookalikes in your family? We invite you to share their photos at info@thebuzzmagazines.com or under this story at thebuzzmagazines.com.

NEIGHBORS

by Pooja Salhotra, staff writer

Getting Into College And does it matter where?

D

avid Nathan was just about ready to hit “submit” on his college-admissions book when news of the largest college bribery scandal in history broke the internet. Federal prosecutors had charged at least 50 individuals, including wealthy parents and celebrities, in a scheme to bribe students’ way into elite colleges, including Yale and Stanford and, closer to home, The University of Texas at Austin.

“These parents couldn’t have been in more need of reading the book,” David said. “The main reason we wrote the book was to make people less anxious about the college process.”

David immediately called his co-author, Nick Accrocco, and said, “We can’t publish this without mentioning what just happened.” So David and Nick sat down and cranked out a new section for the book. “Then it felt complete,” David said.

They published it on Amazon two days later.

The book, Achieving Admission: How to Help Students Get into Selective Colleges and Keep Everyone Sane in the Process – draws on both David’s and Nick’s expertise. David, a Bellaire resident, is a veteran English teacher whose two kids have gone through the admissions process, while Nick has worked on both sides of college admissions, both as an admissions officer and as a high school college counselor. David currently teaches English at St. John’s School, where he met Nick, who used to work in the school’s college counseling office. Nick now serves as the co-director of college counseling at the Ranney School in New Jersey.

Nick and David started working on the book four years ago, but the timing of the book’s release in mid-March could not be more appropriate. The recent scandal demonstrates the lengths some of the wealthiest parents will go to get their kids into a big-name school. To David and Nick, part of the problem – and a key message the book tries to bring home – is the false notion that there is one “right” school for a student. In reality, there are more than 3,000 fouryear colleges. Even if one aspires to attend a school ranked in the top 10 percent, that leaves 300 schools, David noted.

“I don’t know anyone whose lifetime happiness is solely dependent on where they went to college,” WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 20

MOVING DAY English teacher David Nathan, who has watched countless high school seniors go through the college-admissions process, helped son Max Nathan move into Tulane University last fall.

David said. “Why do you have to bribe your way into USC?” he asked, referring to actress Lori Loughlin and her fashion-designer husband Mossimo Giannulli, who allegedly paid $500,000 to get their two daughters into the University of Southern California. “Wouldn’t her kid have been just as happy at, say, Santa Clara University?”

Even before the news of the scandal broke, David and Nick knew parents were taking extreme measures, albeit legal ones, to get their kids into competitive schools. The book recounts one student, nicknamed “Lime Girl,” whom Nick came across when he worked in the

Vanderbilt University admissions office. Lime Girl was waitlisted at Vanderbilt, and, due to some strange logic, the student’s mother mailed a bag full of limes to the school, along with “fun facts about the key lime” (she was from Florida), trying to give her daughter an edge. The mother continued to pester the admissions office, pleading with them to admit her daughter.

Ultimately, Lime Girl was admitted to Vanderbilt. But the admissions office was sure to tell her parents it wasn’t because of the limes.

“If that had gotten out, everyone would be sending limes,” David said with (continued on page 22)

(continued from page 20) a laugh.

Nick remembers that while the limes had no effect on Lime Girl’s admissions, it did give the office a few laughs. “There are certainly ‘gimmicks’ that are employed,” Nick said. “They aren't common, they are often amusing, and seldom move the admissions needle one way or the other.”

As seemingly unbelievable as Lime Girl’s story is, it does reveal an underlying truth about the undue value some parents ascribe to a college acceptance. Achieving Admission recounts how Lime Girl’s mother, not Lime Girl herself, was most excited about gaining admission to Vanderbilt. In fact, when the school called the mother about an hour after informing Lime Girl she was accepted, the mother started screaming in excitement over the phone. The daughter, meanwhile, displayed little to no reaction, though she did decide to enroll at Vanderbilt.

If nothing else, this story, along with the bribery scandal, should serve as a wake-up call for parents. True, we live in a society where attending a certain college brings prestige, not just for the attendee, but for their parents, too. “If a kid gets into a prestigious school, people think ‘Oh, you must be a good parent,’” David says.

But is the time, energy and anxiety worth it?

Academic research says the answer is generally no. In 2014, economists Stacy Dale and Alan Krueger published a paper on the monetary return of attending a top college. They found that after controlling for factors such as students’ SAT scores, economic background and college ambitions, there was virtually no difference between attending a top college and a less selective one. It seemed that the kids who are going to be successful will be successful regardless of which institution they attend.

The researchers did find some exceptions; for example, for black and Hispanic students and students from less privileged backgrounds. For those students, attending a top college did result in a higher financial return. The authors note this could be because less privileged students do not have the same networking opportunities as more privileged students, so they benefit disproportionately from the social capital afforded by attending a selective college.

If fretting over college admissions isn’t worth

COLLEGE CONFESSIONS Created by Brooke Kushwaha, this cartoon appears in David Nathan and Nick Accrocco’s Achieving Admission: How to Help Students Get into Selective Colleges and Keep Everyone Sane in the Process.

it for many students, what can students and parents do to stay sane through the complex process? First is simply understanding how it works. David and Nick’s book illuminates details of the process, and David also recommends visiting college websites. Colleges release all kinds of data, including statistics on how many students from different states, socioeconomic backgrounds and races apply and are admitted. Nick says your in-house college counselor, or an ethical independent counselor, are great resources.

Parents and students can also help themselves by reflecting on the student’s goals before applying. It worries David to see students go through the rigors of applying to dozens of schools, simply because they have no idea what they want.

The perfect story, David says, is not the kid

who gets into every single Ivy League school.

“Why would you even want to apply to every Ivy League school?” It is instead the kid who knew what kind of school he wanted to attend, applied early decision, got admitted and was done with the whole anxiety-inducing process in November of senior year of high school, he says.

But even if a student does not get admitted to a dream school in November, more often than not, everything turns out just fine.

“Yes, it's stressful. Yes, it's overwhelming. And, yes, society makes a big deal about it. However, the research shows that most students who apply to college are admitted somewhere and take a four-year degree, and life is great,” Nick says.

“There is a lot of stress and worry. I get it, but I just keep repeating, ‘It will all be okay.’"

More College Admissions Resources • The Fiske Guide to College: This guidebook published annually includes rankings and analyses on more than 300 American colleges. It includes a self-quiz to help you understand what you’re looking for in a college, a list of strong programs and popular majors at each college plus a special section highlighting the 20 public and private “Best Buy” schools that provide the best educational value.

• College Factual: This free online resource uses a matching technology that can help you find the best-fit college and major.

• Grown and Flown Parents: This active Facebook group, with over 107,000 members, is a community for parents of 15 to 25 year olds. There are also "Grown & Flown" pages on social media and a website at grownandflown.com.

• College Navigator: This is a free resource provided by the U.S. Department of Education. You can use search criteria like academic major, location, size, tuition, etc. to learn more about different schools. The website is a bit of an eyesore but there is a ton of information available on the site.

• College Board – Big Future: You might not think that the organization that runs standardized tests would offer useful college-admissions information, but their Big Future resource does that. You won’t find reviews here, but you can get comprehensive info about nearly every college in the country.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 22

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 23

NEIGHBORS

by Dai Huynh, staff writer

Restaurant Noise What? I can’t hear you

S

ilent is scary,” said Alison Pearlman, summing up one of the reasons restaurants have become so loud.

The Cal Poly Pomona art history professor and restaurant-design expert credits rising noise level in restaurants to several factors, including perception, design trends and celebrity chefs, like Wolfgang Puck. Who would have thought that his restaurant, Spago, played a role?

But here we are, decades later, heirs to dining in surround sound, thanks partly to changing tastes in décor. Yes, noise has become a design element. Restaurateurs use it in the hopes of luring a young, hip crowd and to give their establishments a feeling of liveliness.

Jane Shavlan says several new restaurants in her Memorial neighborhood have open ceilings, with exposed ductwork plumbing. “These places tend to get loud. You get this echo with the exposed ceiling,” she said. “Some are like bars, and bars are loud. But I think it’s almost by popular demand. These are louder than normal restaurants. I feel like it’s ‘the thing.’”

Gone are the days of damask-fabric wallpapers, weighty curtains and cotton tablecloths.

Out the door with them are design fundamentals to soak up chatter and other noise: plush banquettes, wall panels, tablecloths, curtains, carpets and padded tables and chairs.

Now, luxury is most often expressed through stark minimalism – high ceilings, open spaces, exposed ceilings and hard finishes like acrylic and stainless steel. Think mid-century sleek and Scandinavian simplicity. According to Elle Décor, one of the hottest 2019 looks is the clean-edge L.A. café look, comprising elements such as blush walls, brass pendant lights and concrete flooring.

Concrete, metal, wood, brass finishes and other hard surfaces are reflective, amplifying sounds as they ricochet back and forth. Take Biggio’s at the Marriott Marquis on Walker Street. With reclaimed woods and brick walls, the noise level on a recent Thursday night reached 91 decibels (dB) over the course of an hour. That is as loud as a lawnmower or rush-hour traffic.

But it is a sports bar and to be expected, with 30-plus TVs blaring away. However, what we WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 24

discovered with our calibrated sound meter is that many popular restaurants also reach this level. A few even surpass 94 dB at peak hours. According to the American SpeechLanguage-Hearing Association, sounds at 85 dB can damage your hearing after eight hours of continuous listening, while 91dB or higher can cause damage after two hours.

To put it into perspective, the sound of ACOUSTIC CALM Booths, padded chairs and drapes help to soak up noise at leaves rustling or a quiet Hotel Alessandra's Mediterranean-inspired Lucienne. bedroom is 30 dB. Soft few cities, including San Francisco, New York conversation or background music is 60 dB. A and New Orleans. Houston is a recent addition, hairdryer is 80 dB. The subway or shouting is 90 and the list of restaurants will grow as more dB or higher. A nightclub is 100-110 dB, and a Houstonians measure a venue’s sound level and rock concert is 120-130 dB. submit it to the database.

Six years ago, when we searched for quiet dinFew can argue that loud restaurants outnuming spots, we found dozens of restaurants where ber quiet eateries. During our mini-survey, we the sound meter flashed in the low to mid 70s. found that restaurants located in hotels generNormal speech or an ideal conversation level is ally are quieter than stand-alone restaurants, but 70 dB or lower, but up to 75 dB or lower is overall, restaurants have turned up the volume. acceptable for conversation.

Why? It’s good for business.

This time around, our sound meter typically Noise translates to “hotness,” Pearlman says. hovered in the high 70s to mid 80s. Over two Noise is a “social lubricant,” creating a buzz that months, we visited 30 establishments at peak diners not only want, but are “comfortable with” hours. Eateries with a 78-or-higher dB level, at at some level, adds the author of Smart Casual: the time we were there, included Bistro Menil, The Transformation of Gourmet Restaurant Style Uchi, Adair Kitchen, Provisions, Yia Yia Mary’s, and Taste in America.

Chuy’s, Hugo’s, Mala Sichuan Bistro on Diners have been conditioned for loud vibraBellaire, Bosscat Kitchen & Libations, Superica, tions, but it didn’t happen overnight. In the early Postino Heights, True Food Kitchen, North ’80s, the clang-and-bang commotion of the kitchen Italia, Nancy’s Hustle, Killen’s Barbecue, BCK, moved into the dining room, Pearlman says.

Ritual, and Pondicheri.

Puck’s acclaimed Spago opened in 1982, with a When the volume is 76 dB or higher, it is centrally located brick oven, giving rise to the open “difficult for conversation,” and 81 or higher is kitchen. In the ’90s, communal table and full-ser“very loud” and very difficult to carry on convice bar dining added to the vibe. Currently, “fine versations, according to SoundPrint. Launched casual,” rather than fine dining, is driving sales. last April, the smartphone app allows users to The Mintel research firm indicates that 69 percent measure decibels and browse restaurants based of diners want a more casual (continued on page 26) on ambient-noise levels. It’s available in only a

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 25

UNWIND Leather booths and New Zealand rugs add to the intimacy while absorbing ambient noise at the new La Reserve Whiskey Lounge at the Omni Houston Hotel. (continued from page 24) atmosphere, but fine-din-

ing food. Hard surfaces – aluminum, stainless steel, white subway tiles, pipe fixtures – have immigrated from the kitchen to the dining room. Hard surfaces are a lot easier to wipe down, too, saving restaurateurs money on cleaning. And bar and dining areas often blend together.

Loud restaurants are here to stay, but there has been some pushback from diners (often those age 50 and up), pleading for a middle ground.

Recently, Bellaire resident Julia Tamm celebrated her husband’s birthday at a popular restaurant on Upper Kirby. But the tables were so close together, to “maximize” space, she supposed, that it got very loud, especially when a nearby table got boisterous and very drunk. “When they left, the waitress felt so bad, she comped our dessert, but by then, dinner was ruined,” Tamm said.

Some restaurateurs are listening and investing in acoustic solutions and spacing tables appropriately, said founder and creative director Gin Braverman of Gin Design Group. At Eunice on Buffalo Speedway, Braverman positioned soundabsorbing panels between ceiling beams to

reduce noise and filter echo throughout the room. Furniture and even the bar are strategically placed to break up sound, reducing boom and vibration.

Toile drapes, padded mint-green armchairs and plush booths help lower the volume at Lucienne in Hotel Alessandra on Dallas. Hard surfaces reflect sound, so if you want an intimate space where you can converse easily, you combine it with softer material, says marketing director Kyle Rottet of the prestigious design firm Rottet Studio, who worked on Lucienne.

The recently remodeled Omni Hotel on Four Riverway launched the bright, airy Birdies Cafe and Bar, along with La Reserve, a masculine, Texasstyle whiskey room rich with leather sofas and handmade New Zealand wool rugs in reds and blacks to absorb noise. The hotel’s designers agree that sound in restaurants is a fine balance, saying that if the space is too loud, guests can’t enjoy themselves, but if it’s too quiet, the space seems sterile.

Restaurants’ sounds organically are generated from people talking, laughing, eating, clanking spoons and forks, and clinking glasses, so restau-

rateurs can’t simply turn down the volume on that. Sound proofing requires a hefty investment, and for many, the buck stops there.

But not for Slowpokes’ Mazen Baltagi, who took the DIY approach for $300 rather than shelling out more for professional sound-proofing. The co-owner found insulation online and installed it in his Richmond location, using coffee burlaps to hide the bulky squares.

Chef-owner Kiran Verma’s namesake restaurant peaked at 68 dB with a full dining room.

Lush carpet silences the clickety-clack of heels.

Curtains and suede-covered banquettes help insulate against noise. In addition, Verma invested $300,000 in suspended sound-absorbing panels and other noise-reduction elements.

“I wasn’t sure I was doing the right thing, spending this kind of money to sound-proof the restaurant. But it was so important to me to have a place where people can be comfortable, talk, and enjoy their food,” she says. “And you know what? I now have people who are repeat customers just for this reason. People want this, and it is becoming harder to find.”

A sampling of quiet restaurants Aside from Kiran’s Restaurant (2925 Richmond Ave.) and Ristorante Cavour (1080 Uptown Park Blvd.), it was tough finding restaurants with less than 70 decibels. But there are establishments where the sound meter darted between 72 and 76 dB, still good for conversation.

Artisans Restaurant (3201 Louisiana) La Table Houston (1800 Post Oak Blvd., No. 6110) Lucienne in Hotel Alessandra (1070 Dallas) Pizza Motus (6119 Edloe St.) Quattro at the Four Seasons (1300 Lamar St.) Radio Milano at Hotel Sorella (800 Sorella Ct.)

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 26

Rainbow Lodge (2011 Ella Blvd.)

Teppay Japanese Restaurant (6516 Westheimer Road) The Lexington Grille (2005 Lexington St.) The Raven Grill (1916 Bissonnet) Zabak’s Mediterranean Café (5901 Westheimer Road)

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 27

NEIGHBORS

by Cheryl Ursin, staff writer

Yes, And... lawellphoto.com

Learning to do improv

Y

ou know the person who, seeing a local TV news crew on the street, stands in sight of the camera and waves to the viewers at home?

I am not that person.

I have no theatrical experience and wasn’t looking to get any. While I didn’t have a phobia about public speaking, exactly, I never did it voluntarily either. In the grand scheme of things, getting up in front of people was right there on the enjoyment scale with getting my teeth drilled.

So, what was I doing up on a stage, singing a television sitcom theme song, the words to which I was making up as I went along?

(To the tune of the song from Gilligan’s Island, no less?)

Improv.

Improv is, basically, unscripted theater. The people on stage are making things up on the spot. They are hoping it will be funny.

Houston is home to at least three improv theaters: CSz Houston (short for ComedySportz, the name of one of its regular shows), Station Theater and Beta Theater. One home-grown improv team, Can’t Tell Us Nothing, won a national competition in 2018. There is a Houston Meet-Up group for improvisers (also stand-up comics) with almost 800 members.

There’s an annual improv festival, the Trill Comedy Festival, usually held every October.

There are plenty of opportunities in Houston to see improv performed. Both Station and CSz have regular evening shows on the weekends.

Beta Theater has shows every Tuesday evening at Shoeshine Charley’s Big Top Lounge. They all also offer classes.

Which is why I was up on that stage. My husband and I are currently in a Level 4 (out of 5) class at Station Theater. We started when one of our kids wanted to take an improv class but hesitated to do it alone. But now he’s long gone, off to college, and my husband and I continue to do it.

Why? Because, believe it or not, it’s fun. I’m not the only one who thinks so.

Lisa Beckman of West U started taking improv classes, at CSz Houston and Station, about seven years ago, when her children were small. “I was WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 28

PLAYTIME Lisa Beckman, Astrid Lange and Brooke Behrens (from left) practice their improv skills on stage at Station Theater.

spending a lot of time with kids,” she explains.

“Everything was kid-centric.” She’s now on several improv teams, including ones with the people from the classes she originally took.

Making up a story with like-minded people can feel like the pretend play you did as a kid. When improvisers perform or practice, it is called “playing.” What they are doing are “games.”

But just like the play of children, improv is also a learning experience. There are very few things in life that you do without some advance preparation. Need to ask for a raise at work? You probably rehearse what you’re going to say.

Want to flirt with that person you see at Starbucks every morning? You’ve thought about it (hopefully) before you approach them.

Not so with improv. Maybe you are given one

of the hundreds of improv games to play (in “short-form” improv). Maybe you ask the audience for a word to base your improv on, or your improv partner has just said the most outlandish thing you’ve ever heard (in “long-form” improv). And now, right now, you need to respond. And it’s better (really) if you don’t think too much about it.

The cardinal rule of improv is called “Yes, and.” You listen closely to what your partner says. You accept it. The “yes.” If your partner says you are a disgruntled cockroach living under someone’s kitchen sink, you are now a disgruntled cockroach living under someone’s kitchen sink. And then you add to it. The “and.” As that cockroach under the sink, you explain that you’re disgruntled because (continued on page 30)

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 29

the refrigerator; it’s a nicer neighborhood.

“I ‘yes and’ my husband and my children,” says Beckman. “You listen, you accept, and you add. It’s really good for thinking on your feet. It helps a lot in business, in sales, with small talk, with personal relationships.”

Houston’s improv theaters even offer corporate classes to help with team building, creativity and communication. Jessica Brown, co-director of Station Theater, calls this “applied improv.” Her co-director, Roger Anderson, adds, “At its core, improv is basically just hardcore collaboration.”

It can also do wonders for your confidence.

Brooke Behrens, also of West U, credits doing improv with her recent decision to apply to law school at the age of 40.

At the end of each level of classes at Station, the class puts on a performance, their recital.

Brooke’s Level 1 recital was this past July. “I invited all my friends,” she says. (On the other hand, when I have a recital, I tell no one.)

“I was so nervous. I have never been so nervous,” says Behrens. But the recital went well and Behrens was left feeling “like I could fly,” she says.

“Improv is not about learning how to be witty or funny,” says Anderson of Station Theater, which offers a free half-hour intro class every Friday at 7 that includes entry into that night's show (register beforehand). “It’s about taking away the barrier that makes you hesitate and not say what occurs to you. If you say those things, you are going to be funny. You just need to have faith in yourself to do it.”

Improv can also be a great way to meet people.

The Houston improv community is tight-knit.

Improvisers often take classes and perform at multiple theaters. CSz Houston and Station have a reciprocal arrangement: If you take classes up to Level 4 at one, you can start at Level 2 at the other. (The two theaters teach different forms of improv.) While people do come and go as they work their way through the levels, you get to know your classmates, helping each other out on stage each week and learning about each other through the references each makes while playing.

Astrid Lange, who lived in Houston from the eighth grade, attending St. John’s School, until she left for college, recently returned after several years and after living abroad. She decided to look into the local improv scene, joining the Meetup group, taking classes at Station, auditioning at CSz Houston for its professional team. She spends, she figures, at least 16 hours per week at

Improv in Houston Beta Theater: 3708 Main St., www.betatheater.com, 832-602-3821 CSz Houston: 2001 Preston, www.cszhouston.com, 713-868-1444 Station Theater: 1230 Houston Avenue, www.stationtheater.com, 832786-0413

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 30

Jeromy Barber

(continued from page 28) you wish you lived under

SHOWTIME Madelynn Webbe and Mark Harbauer (from left), Beta Theater improv students, perform at their recent level-one recital.

Station, taking two classes, watching performances, going to jam sessions, rehearsing with the teams she’s on. She hosts shows, works the door, works as a technician for shows. She is now working on connecting the Houston improv community to international teams and improv events.

The theaters do differ in some ways.

Most of CSz Houston’s shows, for example, are clean and family-friendly. This is not usually the case with improv. Generally, you will hear some F-bombs and sexual innuendos at an improv show. Another difference: CSz Houston does short-form improv, while the other two focus on long-form.

Short-form improv, best known from the television show Whose Line Is It Anyway?, is more structured. A short-form improv show is run by a host who introduces the games, each lasting a few minutes, that the improvisers will play. For example, in a recent CSz Houston show, the improvisers played a game called “Five Things.”

Two of them left the stage so they couldn’t hear, and the host solicited a list of five different, disparate words from the audience. When the two came back, their teammates had only a few minutes to convey those five words to them. The catch: They could only speak in gibberish and use mime. (They succeeded.)

In long-form improv, the scenes last longer and the games aren’t pre-determined. At the start of a scene, one of the players simply starts by saying something, and through “yes, and,” the improvisers create a world, their characters and the game they are playing as they go.

When you are doing improv, particularly long-form, you can bomb. Boy, can you bomb.

In fact, when you are doing a scene, your teammates stand ready to run across the stage, doing a “sweep.” This signals the scene has ended, whether it’s a good scene ending on a high note or a bad scene being put out of its misery.

The thing you discover, though, is that the possibility of bombing doesn’t matter.

For instance, often a reference is made on stage to something you’ve never heard of.

(Apparently, my younger teammates and I don’t watch the same TV or listen to the same music.)

This can still make for a great scene, though.

At one of my recitals, one player asked another what famous author he was. He blurted out, “George R.R. Martin,” but turns out he didn’t know anything about Martin, including what he had written. (Game of Thrones.) The joke, or the game, of the scene became seeing how he was going to handle that. For one thing, he insisted, throughout the scene, on being referred to by the whole name, “George R.R. Martin,” because those middle initials must be very important, right?

Benji Cooksey, general manager and owner of CSz Houston, started doing improv on Stratford High School’s student team. (CSz Houston still runs this high-school league.) “It’s almost hard for me to watch other live performances,” he says. “It’s hard to recreate spontaneity. Watching improv is like watching magic happen right before your eyes.”

For me, the challenge of improv (well, one of them) is not to dither. Before you fully know what you are going to say, you must seize the opportunity to say it.

At my last recital, my husband and another teammate had just established that they were two grown men who had spent the last two years at a strict religious retreat and needed to escape.

I grabbed another teammate’s hand and strode on stage. “This retreat is a great place to meet guys,” I told her. “They’re desperate and we can totally own them.”

“Yeah! I’m totally over my bad-boy phase,” she said.

The audience laughed.

Yay.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 31

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KIDS

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by Annie Blaylock McQueen, staff writer

Buzz Baby

Staycationing

Buzz Baby is a column about life with little ones.

Writer Annie McQueen has three children age 4 and under.

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lanning a kid-free getaway can be challenging. It’s not easy to hop in the car or on an airplane and leave life behind. And then there’s the price of gas, airline tickets and car rentals – and time off from work. Aren’t vacations supposed to be relaxing?

So why not vacation in Houston?

Take an escape from loading the dishwasher, folding mounds of laundry, trying to match tiny socks, cooking dinner, going to work, and the rest of it.

Take a staycation.

Recently, I ran into a couple I know having cocktails in the bar at The Post Oak Hotel.

They were, in my opinion, mastering the art of the staycation. They were staying the night at the hotel – and said they were “mentally miles away” even though they were around the corner from their house.

Lauren and Bryan Athon also spent a night last December at The Post Oak Hotel. Her parents watched their two children, 3 months and 3 years old, so they could celebrate Bryan’s birthday. Sleeping in a comfortable bed with no interruptions was enough to make the couple feel like they had been whisked away.

“Houston is such a great city to explore as a tourist,” said Lauren.

Another local couple – also a Lauren and a Bryan, but with the last name Frazier – know all about that strategy.

They are frequent “staycationers” and even planned their two babymoons (a vacation while expecting) in Houston. One was at The Houstonian Hotel and Spa in August 2013, when Lauren was pregnant with their first child.

“It surprisingly felt like a real getaway even though it was only one mile from our house,” she said. “There is something about leaving your house – and all the responsibilities that come with it – to relax…. The ambience, the trees and natural surroundings made us feel like we could exhale.” The adults-only pool helped.

For their second babymoon one year later, WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 34

while expecting their daughter, they stayed at Hotel Granduca. “The feel is a bit more city-ish but still felt very relaxing,” she said. Lauren had a prenatal massage at the hotel, and they ventured out for dinner at nearby Ouisie’s Table. “The pool atmosphere was fun and hip, so we felt cool, even though we had a 1 year old and were expecting our second,” said Lauren, laughing. “This staycation came about on a whim, which is the clearest advantage of a staycation. We booked it Wednesday and were hanging by the pool Saturday.”

Over last year’s Memorial Day weekend, Lauren took another staycation at Granduca, but this time with 10 UNWINDING NEAR HOME Lauren and Bryan Frazier enjoyed a stay-ingirlfriends. They relaxed Houston weekend at Hotel Granduca while expecting their second child. by the pool and sipped Her husband surprised her with her own stayfruity drinks. “After our afternoon, we got ready cation. She arrived in her room, enjoyed the still and went out for a nice dinner, a special treat silence, and climbed in bed for an uninterrupted for us mommas to not eat standing up or eating nap. Later, a friend met her for dinner and some leftover chicken nuggets and mac and cheese,” leisurely shopping around the mall. she said.

In the morning, she took the escalator into The Lauren said the best part of the hotel stay was Galleria to pick up her favorite Starbucks drink, enjoying hot coffee in the morning and laughing iced coffee. She returned to her room to enjoy cofand telling stories. “When you are younger and fee in bed while waiting for her late checkout. together more, you make memories together “As a mom, there is very little time for youroften,” she said. “As you get older, if you don’t self,” said Kelsey. “Your only ‘free time’ is when spend time together and make your friendships your child is sleeping, and that is spent doing important, there are no new funny stories.” all the other things around the house that need Another mom, Kelsey Beasley, enjoyed a to be done.” She said the staycation allowed night at The Westin Oaks Houston at The her to recharge her batteries. “All I needed to Galleria last year after a long-anticipated weekworry about was myself. I could do what I want, end away in Fredericksburg had to be cancelled when I wanted.” because her son was ill.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 35

TRAVEL

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by Tracy L. Barnett, staff writer

Travel Buzz

Mexico: Beyond the beach

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exico’s beaches are the stuff of legend: Cancun and the Riviera Maya, with brilliant Caribbean waters, exclusive resorts and an over-the-top Spring Break party scene; Puerto Vallarta, with its enchanting and rugged Pacific Coast; Baja California, with the upscale tourist towns of Los Cabos and the laid-back Todos Santos – U.S. travelers are no strangers to these shores, and flock there by the millions.

What’s less well-known, however, is the outstanding beauty and European charm of Mexico’s colonial cities. It’s a shame that most U.S. travelers never get beyond the beach, says Focus on Mexico editor Bette Brazel.

“That’s one view of Mexico – but there are many Mexicos,” said Bette. “People need to know that Mexico is an indigenous country with 68 different languages… it’s a vast country with all kinds of topographies, histories and cultures, and there’s such a variety that you could spend your whole life just discovering that.”

Topping the list for many is the UNESCO World Heritage Site of San Miguel de Allende, home to a flourishing expat community, a cultural bonanza and a lively party scene. For those who are not afraid to push out of their comfort zone and try out their Spanish, however, as Bette has observed, there’s a whole world out there to explore. We caught up with three Buzz residents and frequent travelers to ask them about their experiences in Mexico’s interior.

“I never go to the beach in Mexico,” said Pam Sengelmann. “There’s so much more to do!”

From the ancient Aztec pyramids of Teotihuacan to the iconic Blue House – Frida Kahlo’s home and museum – there’s no end of things to see in the capital city alone.

Like many Houstonians, Pam got hooked by San Miguel de Allende. Her best friend, CC Hetherington, was among the first investors in the area, buying and renovating a spectacular home there about 25 years ago, and invited her down for a visit. She was entranced, and has been going ever since.

Linda O’Neal, too, was charmed by her first visit to San Miguel. The first time, she went WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 36

with a group of girlfriends; they rented a huge home and spent five days celebrating a birthday. She fell in love with the place and decided to return to study art and weaving.

She loves it so much that she’s returned five times; several times she has rented a home, once for a whole month, and really immersed herself.

So what is it about San Miguel that is draw- TOP OF THE TOWN Pam Sengelmann (at right) with daughter Gretchen, at the Rooftop Bar of San Miguel de Allende’s Rosewood Hotel, famous for sunsets and ing tourists by the 360 degree views. They offer lap blankets after dark, as it gets chilly after sunset. droves? As Travel + to a cocktail party. The weather is perfect all Leisure put it, “In recent years, San Miguel de year long, and the parks and botanical gardens Allende has transformed from a sleepy and highlight the lush beauty of Central Mexico. slightly down-at-the-heels Colonial hill town The city has become a shopping mecca for without a traffic signal into a fiesta-crazy magnet original and culturally influenced designs, says for international gastronomes.” The magazine Pam, who had a business with CC called La recently named the town one of the world’s Bodega, which showcased the work of San friendliest cities.

Miguel artisans and designers at Houston-area Linda describes it as “a wonderful place… a Christmas boutiques, pop-up shops and DASH. little European city in the middle of Mexico.”

It is also an escape for Houston celebrities, who San Miguel was the crossroads of the boomcan be seen in local cafés or browsing crafts at ing silver trade during the 1700s, and so despite the famous Tuesday Market. its isolation it became rich, which is how it grew But San Miguel is just a microcosm of what into an architectural marvel. Its grand cathecan be found in Mexico’s diverse and astounding dral, the Parroquia de San Miguel Arcángel, interior, as Bette pointed out. Many travelers sparkles like a gothic fairytale castle, seen from cite fears of violence and worry about not being a thousand balconies and the hillsides surroundable to speak the language. But English speakers ing the city. The inner architecture is just as are easy to find in major cities, says Bette, and stunning, says Pam. reports of violence are highly overrated. She has “There are all these hidden and subtle doortraveled widely throughout Mexico on buses ways that enter into heavenly gardens and exquiand taxis and has lived for several years in site homes… all in their own ways unique and another expat hub, the charming village of jewel-like,” says Pam. “Every house is different, Ajijic on the coast of Jalisco’s mountain-ringed and they’re all special in different kinds of ways.”

Lake Chapala.

Combined with the work of modern-day “Things happen here like they happen anydevelopers and investors, artists, chefs and shopwhere,” she said. “Tourists are generally not tarkeepers, the colonial grandeur of this small city geted – but when they are targeted it’s generally has blended the best of the traditional with in the more touristy areas.” modern tastes. The city’s friendly party culture On her last trip, Pam decided to explore has opened doors to Pam and other visitors, who Mexico City with some (continued on page 38) on any given day are likely to get an invitation

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(continued from page 36) Texas friends, and she

was impressed. “It was so cosmopolitan; it was like a beautiful version of New York,” she said. “The greenscaping and the parks are just amazing, everywhere you look – and the city is so pristine.”

The only downside, she said, was the traffic – “which is to be expected with 23 million people.” They dealt with it by staying in a certain district and planning many of their activities in that area. They stayed in Polanco – an upscale neighborhood known for its shopping and restaurants – and hired a driver, who waited for them everywhere they went, for a very affordable price. Uber, too, is handy and less than half the price than in the States. Highlights included a day trip north of the city to Teotihuacan where they climbed the Pyramid of the Sun. They took another trip south to Xochimilco, where they floated on the ancient canals on flower-decked gondolas, and they took in a spectacular folkloric ballet performance at the beautiful Palacio de Bellas Artes.

Terry Elizondo, who has been traveling to Latin America for years, tends to avoid the touristy areas as well. She and husband Candelario have dreamed for years of retiring in Latin America, and so they traveled with that in mind, scoping out Panama, Honduras, Costa Rica and even Argentina. In Mexico they checked out many cities: Puebla, Oaxaca, Mexico City, Zacatecas, Guadalajara.

Eventually they settled on Cuernavaca – a medium-sized colonial city an hour from Mexico City, beautiful, authentic and cosmopolitan.

Terry, a recently retired attorney, got a job dogsitting three Chihuahuas for a month for a Canadian couple in their charming bed and breakfast, and over the course of the month, she realized the place was ideal. They’ve purchased a second home there in a beautiful historical neighborhood and are making the transition, and Terry couldn’t be happier.

“The weather is incredible; every day it’s around 33 percent humidity and sunshiny,” she said. “There is a volcano you can look at every day – Popocatepetl – you can see it from here.

All these mountains surround it; that’s why it’s called Cuernavaca. I just look at the mountains and say, ‘Oh my gosh, they are so beautiful.’”

She loves coming through the Tepozteco National Forest on her way home from Mexico City; Cuernavaca is home to four Natural Protected Areas. She also likes that it’s close to Mexico City, where she and Candelario like to go once a month and spend the night, see the sights and enjoy the excellent restaurants. The central location also makes it easy to explore.

At home, she loves eating fresh tropical fruit – especially the ones picked from her own garden, where papaya, lemon, orange, lime and heirloom tomatoes grow in abundance. There’s a yoga class and a library within walking distance. The massive palace of Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortés – the oldest conserved colonial structure in the Americas – is nearby.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 38

COLONIAL CHARM Candelario and Terry Elizondo, with their friend Patti Guy, (from left), in front of the temple of Tepoztlan, one of Mexico’s 121 "Magical Pueblos,” 10 of which are within three hours of Mexico City.

It’s been fun connecting with other internationals living in Cuernavaca as well; as in San Miguel and many other cities, there is a socially active and tightly knit expat community, although they are as likely to come from New Zealand, Holland or England as they are to be from the United States. And unlike San Miguel, the expats are spread all over town – so her neighbors are Mexican, and she likes it that way.

She’s only had one uncomfortable incident.

It happened at a grocery store, when someone overheard her speaking English to her sister, and came up to her and began berating her about Donald Trump.

“Three clerks ran over and shuffled him away,” she said. “Nobody likes Donald Trump

down here – but they didn’t like it that he did that to me.”

Nobody has bothered her about the subject since, she said, and her interactions with locals have always been friendly and kind.

“We’ve had lots of people come down and they can’t believe how nice it is,” Terry said.

“Mexico has such a bad rap – and it’s so unfair, because it doesn’t seem to get any better. But what I’ve found is that if you mind your own business and don’t do anything you wouldn’t do in Houston, you will be fine.”

Editor’s note: Buzz travel columnist Tracy L. Barnett is a Lowell Thomas travel journalism award winner and longtime travel and environmental writer.

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by Kolbi Blanchette, contributing writer

Cooking Buzz

Photo courtesy of the Junior League of Houston

FOOD

Fit for a queen, aka Mom Cooking Buzz is produced in partnership with the Junior League of Houston, a women’s charitable and education organization founded in 1925.

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unch with your mother on Mother’s Day is always a good idea – and it is also the perfect opportunity to make some lighter recipes as weather warms up. There is no better way to celebrate Mom than with a beautiful tabletop and delicious meal.

The Best Ever Stuffed Eggs recipe from The Houston Junior League Cookbook really may be the best deviled eggs. The recipe makes eight eggs, ideal for a small family lunch. (“Stuffed” eggs is another name for deviled eggs and is particularly used in the South at church functions. You can imagine why!) Sprinkle paprika, green onions or bacon crumbles on the eggs to add a little color and taste. There is no wrong way to dress up deviled eggs, so use whatever strikes your fancy.

For lunch, I keep it simple with a green salad and salmon dish. Monica Pope’s recipe for Organic Herb Salad with Simple Lemon Vinaigrette from Peace Meals is so lovely and impressive, while not difficult to make. Monica notes that you can find the herbs at grocery stores, farmers’ markets or garden centers, which we are fortunate to have all over Houston.

Salmon with Horseradish Sauce from Peace Meals is another easy dish and a nice twist for salmon. The horseradish adds just enough kick to keep this dish far from boring. You can serve it with pearl couscous, rice or your favorite vegetable.

Finally, keep dessert simple with the Banana Cake from Stop and Smell the Rosemary. While not the prettiest dessert, it is delicious, easy and not too heavy for a midday meal. It is also a great way to use overripe bananas. You can skip the frosting if it is too sweet, as the cake tastes great on its own.

This meal deserves a charming table, so dazzle Mom with your best dishes, glassware and linens.

Trader Joe’s has inexpensive, small potted plants that can serve double duty as seating cards and decoration. I also love to make a simple flower arrangement for the centerpiece; add fresh basil stems to flower arrangements for a heavenly scent (you should have some left over from the Organic Herb Salad). This is also the perfect WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 40

SWEET CELEBRATIONS The Banana Cake from Stop and Smell the Rosemary is easy and perfect for Mother’s Day, or any time.

time for sentimentality, so use a vase or bowl that may have significance for your family.

Mom will love it … and you.

Organic Herb Salad with Simple Lemon Vinaigrette From Peace Meals, courtesy of Monica Pope Simple Lemon Vinaigrette (makes 2¼ cups) 1 ⁄8 cup lemon juice 2 cups olive oil (not extra virgin) 2 teaspoons sugar 2 teaspoons kosher salt 1 teaspoon white pepper, ground finely Salad: Approximately ¼ cup of each of the following organically grown herbs: Italian flat leaf parsley leaves Basil leaves, torn Chives, snipped to ¾-inch long Chervil leaves Cilantro leaves Dill springs Tarragon leaves Salad burnet leaves Lemon balm 1 head butter lettuce, separated into cups Organically grown edible flowers (pansies, borage, chive blossoms, nasturtiums or calendulas) Whisk together all the vinaigrette ingredients in a small bowl; set aside. Pick and clean the herbs (leaves should be whole except for large basil leaves, which can be torn in half). Dress the herbs and butter lettuce lightly with the Simple Lemon Vinaigrette. Place the butter lettuce leaves on each plate so that they form a cup. Fill

the lettuce cup with the herbs. Pick the petals off of the flowers and sprinkle over the herbs.

Makes 4 to 6 salads.

Banana Cake From Stop and Smell the Rosemary Cake: ½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, at room temperature 1½ cups sugar 2 large eggs 3 large bananas, mashed ¾ cup chopped pecans ¼ cup milk 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract 2 cups all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking soda Frosting: 2 Tablespoons unsalted butter, melted 2 cups powdered sugar, sifted 1 banana, mashed ½ to 1 cup chopped pecans Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Grease and flour a 9- by 13-inch baking dish. Cream butter and sugar in a large bowl. Mix in eggs and banana. Add pecans, milk and vanilla, blending well. Sift flour and baking soda. Add to banana mixture. Pour into prepared pan. Bake 30 to 35 minutes.

Cream butter, powdered sugar and banana.

Spread frosting on warm cake and sprinkle with pecans. Serves 8 to 10.

MORE ONLINE See thebuzzmagazines.com for more recipes.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 41

DINING

by Dai Huynh, staff writer

Chef’s Corner

Felipe Riccio

Find out about your favorite chefs in our Chef’s Corner column. This month, restaurant writer Dai Huynh interviews Goodnight Hospitality chef-owner Felipe Riccio.

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hree years ago, Felipe Riccio was living the dream of a young chef, jumping from one esteemed restaurant to the next, bouncing from kitchen to kitchen, honing his skills, and traveling through Europe. Goodnight Hospitality’s 29-year-old chef-owner said these are just a few of the benefits of stage (a French term, pronounced stazhjer). Here, Felipe explains what stage entails and why it is one of the best resume builders for toques, young and old. The Veracruz-born, Missouri City-raised chef also offers us a glimpse of one of 2019’s most anticipated openings.

In late December 2017, with master sommelier David Keck and developer Peter McCarthy, you opened the honky-tonk-themed Goodnight Charlie’s (2531 Kuester St). Now, Goodnight Hospitality is opening three concepts adjacent to your music venue/restaurant along 1600 Westheimer.

Long story short, it went from one restaurant to two restaurants and a retail shop for multiple reasons. Mainly, we got to rebuild the building.

So, the first one is Rosie Cannonball. It is an homage to the great dining cultures of Southern Europe. The anchor of the kitchen is this woodburning grill. It has about 70, 75 seats or so. We want it to be this lively, energetic place with lots of sharable items.

How did you get the name? It’s a cool-sounding name, but I can’t make the connection with Southern Europe.

Rosie Cannonball comes from Pete’s daughter, Grace. We spent weeks trying to figure out names for these places. We weren’t getting anywhere. There were Spanish, Italian and French names being thrown around. One night, Pete asked Grace, just kiddingly. She said, “Rosie Cannonball.” The name stuck. We kept coming back to it week after week, until our designer said, “Let’s just call it that.”

And so, the chef de cuisine for Rosie will be Adam Garcia. We worked at Pass & Provisions WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 42

together.

Your retail concept, like its name, Montrose Cheese & Wine, is straightforward, but what about the March concept?

With 26 seats, March is intimate, ideal for a tasting menu. It’s immersive, relaxed.

There is back and forth as to whether fine dining is dead.

Obviously, I don’t think it’s dead, but people want it a FELIPE RICCIO A native of Mexico, Goodnight Hospitality partner-executive chef Felipe little differently Riccio immigrated to Houston as a teenager and started his career with French master than they did in chef Frédéric Perrier before sharpening his knife at REEF and The Pass & Provisions. the ’80s and ’90s, Luciano, is an Italian who loves to cook. You started and even the early 2000s. March will be a cooking with your dad, making tomato sauce. It’s a research menu, and the core question is what cuisine close to your heart, so where do you go for does Mediterranean mean from the perspective Italian? of food?

I still love Giacomo’s (3215 Westheimer). I Stage is “the thing” these days with chefs, even love sitting on the patio. It’s simple. It’s deliamong established ones, who take a break from their cious. I order a little bit of everything, but I love stovetop to labor and learn at another restaurant in the mozzarella in carrozza. You got to eat it right a different city, or even country. Define stage. away, and her meatballs are always awesome.

You’re unpaid help basically. Each restaurant Any other places you like? has its own way of deciding what a stage does.

UB Preserv (1609 Westheimer) across the Sometimes, you peel carrots. Other times, you street is fantastic. What Nick Wong is doing help with a lot more. I got lucky with my stages. over there with Chris Shepherd is incredible. It’s In 2016, I spent three months in Modena, Italy, singing right now. One of my favorite flavors at Osteria Francescana, doing everything from right now is the tomatillo sauce with the saltprep work to private events with Massimo. I even and-pepper fried calamari. It just encapsulates helped on a photo shoot for their newest book. what UB is.

Wait a minute. You worked with chef Massimo And as delicious as the tacos at Goodnight Bottura? Last year, his restaurant was considered Charlie’s are, they’re not truck tacos. I love the best in the world by more than 1,000 restauraTaqueria El Palomo (401 Westheimer) in the teurs, food experts, chefs and restaurant critics. parking lot of Avant Garden. That is my guilty I had some phenomenal experiences. I also pleasure right there. staged at Erba Brusca in Milan; Belcanto in Lisbon, Portugal; and Blue Hill at Stone Barns Editor’s note: Buzz dining columnist Dai Huynh in Tarrytown, New York. It was definitely an is a James Beard food-journalism award winner and opportunity of a lifetime. longtime Houston-based restaurant writer.

Your mom, Patricia, is Spanish, and your dad,

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WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 43

SPORTS

by Todd Freed, staff writer Jill Williams

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SportzBuzz F

or the first time in school history, the St. John’s Mavericks own an SPC championship in girls’ soccer, capturing the title with a thrilling 1-0 victory over Dallas Hockaday. In the SPC final, Mavericks sophomore Carter Hollingsworth scored the only goal in the victory.

“Our starting eleven was so good that if everyone stayed healthy, we knew this would be a special year,” said Mavericks head coach Susan Quill. “We were just that talented. We returned our entire starting lineup minus our goalkeeper, so we also had great depth.” Leading the way, said Quill, were a pair of team MVPs in senior forwards Stephanie Sarkar and Shelby DesRoches. DesRoches will play college soccer at Rice University next season.

The championship was especially meaningful for Quill, who 20 years ago graduated from St. John’s as the nation’s top high school basketball prospect, before going on to become a basketball All-American at North Carolina. “Soccer wasn’t really a whole lot of fun at St. John’s back then, so I just played on the club level. When I began coaching soccer, I ultimately wanted to come back to St. John’s and put the program on the map.”

The quest for a second straight UIL 6A state championship came up short for the Memorial Mustangs, but not before making their mark once again as one of the state’s top teams. “Our girls gave it their best effort every single day,” said Mustangs head coach Lindley Amarantos. The Mustangs owned a 19-3 record before falling to defending 6A state semifinalist Cinco Ranch by a 3-2 heartbreaker in a classic playoff matchup.

“We had a target on our back as defending state champions, but our girls really rose to the challenge. Our only three regular-season losses were in the season-opening I-10 Shootout tournament when we were missing six starters due to a club college showcase and a couple of injuries,” said Amarantos.

Led by eight returning players from last season’s state championship team, the Mustangs were undefeated district champions for the second straight season. Sophomore Kelsey Hranciky, who’s already committed to play college soccer at Texas, led the district in goals and assists with 63 total points. In

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 44

STATE CHAMPS TIMES TWO It was a double dose of state championships for Saint Thomas’ Episcopal, with the boys and girls teams winning TAPPS Division III titles. The STE girls went 22-1 while outscoring opponents by a 96-11 margin.

addition, sophomore Juliann Kidd, junior Reagan Goodwine and junior Blakely Buckingham all had big seasons, according to Amarantos.

The Bellaire Cardinals girls’ soccer team captured its sixth straight district championship, while going undefeated in district for the third straight season. The last time Bellaire lost a district game was when the current senior crop of players were freshmen.

“It’s been a hardworking, unselfish group of players,” said Bellaire head coach Alan Thompson. “We prioritize defense and have a really great goalkeeper in sophomore Cate Plagens, who was the district goalkeeper of the year.” Offensively, the Cardinals were led by District MVP Jasmin Garzon. “She’s the heartbeat of our offensive attack.”

The Cardinals also overcome their fair share of adversity, including the loss of standout junior defender Demetra Pappas with a foot injury.

“Deme’s one of our captains and leaders,” said Thompson. “She was a dominant force on defense before her injury about halfway through the season.”

It was a banner year in soccer for Saint Thomas’ Episcopal School, with the boys and girls soccer teams both winning TAPPS Division III state championships. “It was pretty unique,” said STE director of soccer Chris White. “Not too many schools have had girls

and boys championships on the same weekend.”

The STE girls were dominant while posting a 21-1 record and outscoring opponents by a lofty 96-11 margin. “They played with a lot of passion,” said White. “We lost in the state quarterfinals two years ago and were knocked out in the state semifinals last year, so this team played with a chip on its shoulders.” Offensively, juniors Katherine Lazor and Reese McDermott led the way, while goalkeeper Sofia Snyder-Perez allowed only 11 goals in 22 games.

The STE boys outscored their opponents by a 104-10 margin while winning 22 of their 24 games. “The guys were also on a mission after losing in the state semifinals two years ago,” said White. In the state-final 2-1 victory over Dallas Covenant, White credited a heroic effort from several of his players. “Our goalkeeper, Grayson Brewer, made a series of great saves. Also, junior Wilberth Araujo was a game changer for us, while junior Joel Hrncir was a deadly striker who scored the game winner in the title game.”

Editor’s note: Todd Freed is the Emmy Awardwinning co-host and producer of the KUBE SportsZone, which airs Saturday and Sunday at 6 p.m. on Channel 57-KUBE. To submit high school sports news for possible inclusion in SportzBuzz, please email todd@thebuzzmagazines.com.

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Relief from financial worries The financial services industry is well equipped to assist wealthy families and individuals with traditional financial concerns like tax reduction, investing, insurance, and estate planning.

But how do you address non-traditional concerns like these? ● No time to properly manage your family finances. ● Lack of organization and control of your wealth. ● Absence of a knowledgeable and objective sounding board. ● General sense that you’re missing opportunities for improvement.

In our experience, non-traditional wealth management concerns like these are more prevalent and problematic than the traditional variety because it’s less apparent where to turn for relief. This causes concerns to fester, often for a naggingly long time. Financial peace of mind is not possible when non-traditional financial concerns go unaddressed.

Traditional financial advisors aren’t the solution: Seeking the help of a traditional financial services professional – investment advisor, accountant, financial planner, insurance agent – to resolve non-traditional wealth management concerns may be disappointing for two main reasons. First, they don’t have the skills and experience to solve non-traditional problems.

Second, they don’t have a way to get compensated for their time.

Learn from the ultra-wealthy: Many ultra-wealthy families and individuals ($100+ million net worth) resolve financial concerns by maintaining a family office. A family office has a staff dedicated to managing all aspects of family wealth. It either has the breadth of in-house expertise such that non-traditional issues rarely arise, or it maintains a relationship

with professionals charged with resolving any non-traditional financial concerns. However, a family office is not a realistic solution for most because of the expense and complexity of maintaining.

Help for the wealthy: Relatively few financial advisors specialize in helping clients with non-traditional concerns. Our firm happens to be one of them. For a successful search, first focus on how advisors are compensated. You can choose an advisor who is paid by the hour, project, or a flat fee. Consider beginning your search at the Family Office Exchange (FOX). Most FOX members are multi-family offices, which are like the family offices referenced above, but they work with many families, not just one. While the personal attention is less than that offered by a full-blown family office, the cost is also less.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, subtle and nagging concerns about your wealth – such as lack of time for proper management, no sounding board for ideas and questions, and no one to coordinate your various advisors – are the real reason you don’t feel as good as you would like about your wealth.

Professional help is available, but you must be diligent in your search.

James R. Waters, CFP®, PARTNERSINWEALTH, 3400 Bissonnet, Suite 145, Houston, Texas 77005, 713.964.4028, jrw@partnersinwealth.com, www.partnersinwealth.com

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 45

SPORTS

.

by Angie Frederickson, staff writer

SportzBuzz Jr. W

elcome to SportzBuzz Jr., a column spotlighting neighborhood athletes in elementary and middle school.

Kicking off the season Horn Elementary fifth graders Lauren Magid, Becca Wise, Madeline Sisk, Maggie Hester and Ellen Moore (top photo, from left) represent their softball teams at the annual West University Softball Association (WUSA) opening-day parade. All of the WUSA divisions were represented, with girls carrying banners and dressed in fun costume accessories, while an announcer introduced each team. After the parade, the girls and their families headed over to the ball field for opening ceremonies, followed by a carnival. The teams enjoyed game booths, bounce houses and a climbing wall, while being entertained by a DJ and snacking on cotton candy and Chick-fil-A.

Homerun-derby champ Yahya Mir (middle photo, with trophy) is this year’s Bellaire Little League (BLL) homerun derby champ. After hitting 10 balls over the fence during the annual event, he was declared the winner. The competition is an annual tradition and part of BLL’s celebration for the opening of the spring season. Each year, the oldest boys in the league have a chance to participate in the contest. The 12-year-old players take their turns at bat to see how many balls they can hit outside the park. Friends and homerun competitors are (from left) Jacob Leach, Marshall Smith, Joe DeToto, Yahya, Henry Turner, Paolo Rappazzo, Andrew Gagliardi and Maddux El Hakem.

A sixth-grade first The Presbyterian School of Houston’s sixth-grade girls basketball team (bottom photo) finished an undefeated season, including both regular-season games and tournaments. Presbyterian School participates in the Houston Junior Preparatory Conference, and the team had victories over Duchesne Academy, St. Francis Episcopal Day School, St. John’s School, River Oaks Baptist School and several others. Leading the team to victory was Sydney Parks (middle, with ball) who set a personal record of 200 points for the year. Sydney is the first Presbyterian School female athlete to score 200 points as a sixth grader, and the 11th female in the school’s history to achieve the honor. The undefeated champs are (from left) Ariel Bradshaw, Abigail Ahuero, Lauren Forgrave, Maureen Ebaugh, coach Sam Murray, Sydney Parks, Warner Stahlbaum, Claire Murray, Annabelle Woodcox and Brett Selldin.

Editor’s note: Send your best high-resolution photos and behind-the-scenes stories about young local athletes, in both team and individual sports, to SportzBuzz, Jr. at info@thebuzzmagazines.com. Include all contact info, names, ages, grades and schools. Featured athletes must live in Buzz-circulation neighborhoods. Items will be published on a space-available basis.

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 46

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Update on nose sprays The most popular type of preventative nose sprays for allergy contains small amounts of steroids. Examples include Flonase, Nasacort and Nasonex. For the past several years, Flonase and Nasacort have been available without a prescription (OTC). A couple years ago, Rhinocort also went OTC. One advantage of Rhinocort is its lack of irritating preservatives.

Flonase contains phenylethyl alcohol (PEA), which gives it that floral odor.

Many people find the odor unpleasant, though others tell us it’s the “smell of relief.” PEA, an alcohol, can dry the inside of the nose and cause nosebleeds. Both Flonase and Nasacort contain benzalkonium chloride (BKC), another preservative that can dry out the nose. Rhinocort has neither, so many prefer it. In March 2017, Glaxo (owner of Flonase) put Veramyst OTC, renaming it Flonase Sensimist. Like Rhinocort, Flonase Sensimist has no PEA or BKC, so it too is gentler. Why would Glaxo put its superior product OTC? To sell some. They couldn’t sell much prescription-only Veramyst for $250, but OTC Flonase Sensimist sells for $23, minus the $5 coupon available on their website.

Meanwhile, Glaxo’s Flonase, which contains fluticasone propionate (along with PEA and BKC), is losing more and more market share to generics, which can sell for less than half the $20 price. Recently, Costco had a package of five bottles of its Flonase generic, called Aller-Flo, on sale for $16.99! That’s less than $4 each.

All these sprays contain steroids. Are they safe? For the most part, yes.

Flonase contains 50 micrograms (mcg) of fluticasone. So 2 sprays per nostril per day is 200 mcg. In the meantime, our adrenal glands make 5,000 mcg of

cortisol each day (5 milligrams), so the 200 mcg doesn’t really add too much unless the patient is also using other forms of steroids, such as preventative asthma inhalers.

Unlike decongestant nose sprays, such as Afrin, you can’t become physically dependent on steroid nose sprays. The decongestant nose sprays go to work more quickly than steroid nose sprays, but the more you use them, the less effective they are.

Next to go OTC will probably be Nasonex, which lost its patent and is now sold mostly as generic. Interestingly, the same company that owns Afrin also owns Nasonex. Abstracts have been presented at allergy meetings testing a combination spray with both Nasonex and Afrin.

Should we get ready for Nasonex-D? No one nose allergies like we do.™ Note: Information contained in this article should not be considered a substitute for consultation with a board-certified allergist to address individual medical needs.

David B. Engler, M.D., The Allergy Clinic, 7707 Fannin, Suite 100, Houston, Texas 77054, 713.797.0993, *1200 Binz, Suite 180, Houston, Texas 77004, 713.522.9911, www.allergyclinic.com, *Operating as Houston Allergy and Asthma Clinic

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 47

MUSICIANSHIP Tina Li, a freshman at Carnegie Vanguard High School, joined the Virtuosi of Houston orchestra when she was only 11.

KIDS

by Tina Li, age 15

Buzz Kidz

Taking a musical adventure with Virtuosi

O

n March 30, at the Intercontinental Hotel, a flurry of extravagant dresses and tuxedos crowded outside the entrance to the ballroom, awaiting the night’s top event: Virtuosi of Houston’s Music in Motion Gala. In my four years as a member of the orchestra, this annual event always has held a special place in my heart. It is a time that I can truly realize the impact Virtuosi has on the community.

I first joined Virtuosi, a chamber and jazz orchestra for young artists, when I was 11, the then-youngest member. Virtuosi was my first experience in the professional world of music. It was intimidating. I still get flustered at the memories of my audition, when the maestros asked me to play G minor, and, in my nerves, I played, well, not G minor. Regardless, it seems I had

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 48

redeemed myself enough from that error.

Receiving the acceptance letter was a joyful surprise. In the middle of a Saturday violin lesson, I opened the mailbox to find a huge manila folder carrying a smaller envelope, in which lay the beginning of my journey with Virtuosi.

Since then, Virtuosi has become nothing less than a second home to me. It was with Virtuosi that I first crossed the International Date Line, on a trip to London to perform in the Chichester Cathedral. It was with Virtuosi that I first played a paid gig. And it was with Virtuosi that I was given the magnificent opportunity of performing in the Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts in Washington D.C. this year.

In the next six weeks, I will count down the rehearsals until the final concert of the 2018-19

season. I, along with the rest of the orchestra, will then be saying goodbye to the seniors. And like every other member who has come and gone, I have realized the impact Virtuosi has had on me, in developing myself as a musician and as a person. I look forward to next year’s season and all the amazing adventures Virtuosi has in store.

Want to be a Buzz Kid? Email approximately 350 words, a high-resolution photo and caption to info@thebuzzmagazines.com. Or mail it to The Buzz Magazines, 5001 Bissonnet, Suite 100, Bellaire, Texas 77401.

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How are you feeling?

Do you have enough energy? Are you feeling run down and having trouble sleeping at night? Do you feel anxious even when you are relaxing? Having trouble concentrating on tasks at work or home? Would you like there to be more physical intimacy in your life? Then maybe hormone replacement therapy is for you. Hormones have been shown to regulate many things, including energy, weight, sleep, mood, mental clarity and even libido.

What is Bio-Identical Hormone Replacement Therapy (BHRT)? Bioidentical refers to how molecularly similar the supplemental hormone is to the hormones in one’s body. Other supplemental hormones, such as the ones administered by conventional physicians, may not be bio-identical.

Bio-identical hormones are derived from plants, while synthetic hormones are derived from animals.

Hormone replacement therapy is the purpose of the bio-identical hormones. People who lack certain hormones or who have too much of a certain hormone may benefit from BHRT. Studies show BHRT can be a solution for many common and debilitating symptoms that are often overlooked by healthcare professionals. Some of these symptoms include exhaustion, stress, foggy thinking, weight gain, sleep disturbances and more. Often, people with symptoms like these are suffering from hormonal imbalance.

Studies show these symptoms are treated by getting to the root cause of these complex conditions.

BHRT is a simple method for relieving these complex issues. The BioTE® Method of pellet therapy offers continuous release of hormones to the body 24/7 with 2 to 4 procedures per year, depending on daily activity

levels. Plus, studies show optimized hormones offer additional forms of health protection. BHRT pellets are subcutaneous implants that are inserted into the hip area. They are made of custom compounded hormones and natural binders to hold them together. The hormones are compounded in one of two pharmacies in the United States that are licensed FDA outsourcing centers and are held to strict standards. Each lot of pellets is tested for consistency, potency and purity and to ensure our patients are being provided the best possible therapy. The BHRT pellet-insertion process is straightforward, fast and simple.

If you would like to improve your quality of life, please call our office and schedule a visit to test your current hormone levels. Then, based on your comprehensive consultation and thorough blood work panel, we will determine if you are a candidate for the BioTE® Method Pellet Therapy. Last, a quick follow up appointment will be scheduled for your custom pellet-therapy insertion. Call us today and start feeling better!

JVC Family Medicine, 17347 Village Green Drive, Suite 106, Houston, Texas 77040, 713.466.0197, www.jvcfamilymedicine.com

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 49

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Social media and divorce

Neighborhood Tails

713.662.2119 www.roveroaks.com

Belle, age 10, Coton de Tulear, Westchester Ave. My name is Belle, and I’m a proud firstgeneration American dog, born and raised in Texas. I was born to a Hungarian dad and an American mom, just like my human mom. I was too small to be shown at dog shows, but that’s okay. I found my calling as a human cuddler. I love to be held like a baby and attached close to a human. Some might say I’m over the hill, but all the love I give and get has kept me spry. I love playing roughietoughie, tearing up paper cups with Dad. Mom calls me her “little kitten” because I love lapping up milk in the morning. I’m calm, with a sunny disposition, except when pups antagonize me with their friskiness. Then I’m all business and put those young rascals in their place. If you see me out for walkies, don’t be shy. Bend down and pet me. I’m here to spread some love!

Got a cute critter? Email a picture of your pet with approximately 150 words to info@thebuzzmagazines.com or mail it to The Buzz Magazines, 5001 Bissonnet, Suite 100, Bellaire, Texas 77401. Featured pets receive two passes to Rover Oaks Pet Resort. Each pass can be redeemed for one day of lodging in a Bunk House Suite, 25 percent off your next grooming appointment or 25 percent off one obedience training class.

Recent studies have shown that 30-40 percent of divorces involve social media, either before or during, or both. The medical and mental health communities have established that social media is addictive. The incessant posting, updating and checking for likes and activities on what we post disrupt our face-to-face relationships with spouses and children. Social media creates an easy avenue for the rekindling of old relationships in an innocent way. That artificial sense of connection and intimacy can often lead to an emotional, if not physical, affair for a spouse who might otherwise have never cheated. Trust issues are also triggered when a spouse either hides the use of social media or the other spouse is caught snooping on the spouse’s activity.

Social media posts are also evidence. Photos, tagged locations and direct messages are discoverable, even when the profile has been shut down.

During a divorce, social media can easily become a news source for the other side, especially when “friends” are reporting your every move. Therefore, it is wise to refrain from, or at least lay low on, social media during a divorce and request your friends do the same as far as you are concerned.

Angela Pence England handles complex divorce and family matters in both litigation and collaboration.

Tindall England PC, Angela England, Partner, Board Certified in Family Law; Fellow, American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 515 Post Oak Blvd., Suite 500, Houston, Texas 77027, 713.622.8733, www.tindallengland.com

Create a buzz for your biz.

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To advertise in The Buzz Magazines, contact us at 713.668.4157, ext. 11 or advertising@thebuzzmagazines.com WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 50

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Estate planning for artists My grandmother enjoyed painting, but her will did not address her art.

Family appreciation of her work was mixed. Cleaning her home involved one cousin filling a dumpster with paintings while another cousin fished them out, one by one.

For successful artists of modest means, the best estate plan may give a few pieces to family and sell the rest. To ensure deductibility of the sale expenses, the will or trust instrument should direct the sale of any remaining art and distribution of the proceeds.

Leaving valuable art “in equal shares” or letting the executor decide invites trouble. Leave specific items to specific beneficiaries or let beneficiaries pick. Oldest child can get first choice, then second oldest, then so on.

Either way, equalize distributions made from other assets.

Families with less than $5 million need not worry about estate taxes. Most artists can relax. However, consider an artist married to a physician, or the artist who is a physician. Wealthier artists might make a planned gift to charity or an artist-funded foundation.

For gifts of art to the surviving spouse, preservation of the estate tax marital deduction is a concern. There’s no problem with an unrestricted, specific bequest to the surviving spouse, whether particular items or the entire collection. Those qualify for the marital deduction, and the sky’s the limit, at least if the surviving spouse is a U.S. citizen. However, what about giving the surviving spouse a right of first refusal over the same thing? Imagine the spouse can pick one or more favorites. Rights of first refusal may create a taxable gift. To preserve the marital deduction, instead give all art to the surviving spouse but

enable a qualified disclaimer, anticipating an alternate beneficiary for the rejected art.

Every artist should prepare an inventory with description, name, date, story, condition, repairs, location, and exhibitions. For extra credit, take pictures, assign ID numbers, include measurements, note mediums, and guess values.

Make a marketing plan. Tell your executor the best auction house or gallery to sell your work.

Collectors and executors will have additional considerations, from valuation to risk management, provenance, and liquidity. Consult Ramsay H. Slugg’s Handbook of Practical Planning for Artists, Art Collectors, and Their Advisors (2d ed., ABA 2019). Artists, visit https://www.gyst-ink.com/estate-planning.

This article was not intended or written to be used, and it cannot be used by the taxpayer, for the purpose of avoiding penalties that may be imposed on the taxpayer.

We write wills and go to probate court. We offer no-obligation initial interviews for estate planning and administration, so it costs nothing to hear specific recommendations that suit your needs. Foreign nationals and international families welcome.

Russell W. Hall, J.D., LL.M. (Tax), Board Certified – Estate Planning and Probate Law, Texas Board of Legal Specialization, 6750 West Loop South, Suite 920, Bellaire, Texas 77401, 713.662.3853, bellaireprobate.com

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 51

Chris Bailey Photography

NEIGHBORS

.

by Jordan Magaziner Steinfeld, staff writer

Buzz About Town shower was held at a particularly special time as mom-to-be Merve and dad-to-be Alper Duran had just finished studying for their medical and dental board exams. The couple, who are both from Turkey, first met at the library of Istanbul University, and moved to the U.S. together.

Alper was accepted into the radiology residency program at UTMB, and Merve was accepted at Rutgers University School of Dentistry. The future grandparents are thrilled to welcome the first grandchild on both sides. Pictured are (from left) Munevver Duran, future grandmother Cihan Duran, dad-to-be Alper Duran, mom-tobe Merve Duran, future grandfather Ahmet Duran and Elif Duran.

Wonderland wedding Veritas Christian Academy seventh grader Ellie Veeningen was awarded a Gold Key award by the Harris County Department of Education and the Scholastic Art & Writing Awards for her short story, “Our World.” Her story also earned a National Medal. Ellie will join other winners in June at Carnegie Hall in New York City. Veritas seventh grader Virginia Fairfield received a Silver Key for her short story, “What Really Mattered.” Pictured are Ellie (at left) and Virginia (right) receiving their certificates.

Welcome, baby Duran Baby boy Duran was showered with love at a baby shower hosted by Cihan Duran. The

Caroline Cavanaugh and Ryan Saccone were married at St. Michael Catholic Church, and guests celebrated afterward at the Houston Racquet Club. Ryan and Caroline met while students at St. Thomas High School and St. Agnes Academy, although their romance did not unfold until they started dating in 2014. The groom’s cake was a giant display of alma mater Ohio State’s football stadium. The couple honeymooned in the French Polynesian islands.

Proud parents are John and Kathy Saccone and Steve and Debbie Cavanaugh. Bridesmaids were Holly Wisnoski, Jessica Freeman, Ashley Cavanaugh, Ashlyn Brown, Cristina Duke, Jennifer Mandelbaum and Ashley Smith, and

groomsmen were Matt Saccone, Kieth Freeman, Matt Cavanaugh, Chip Cavanaugh, Michael Saccone, Evan Sterle, Frankie Reyes, Thomas Ferrante, Adam Diehl and Ryan Brundrett.

Celebrating culture Karen Aranky

Veritas writers

The Mark Twain Elementary community enjoyed its annual International Festival, which showcased dishes, a parade of nations, music and dances from more than 20 countries. Students rehearsed for months. Fifth-grade dual-language students are pictured performing Latin Fusion Dance by Beatriz Rozo: Lucas Ferro, Noa Sartin, Devin Varner, Marisabel Alamo, Sofia Biurrun, Nate Barcot, Maria Ortiz, Alana Barrios, Bella Alcanter, Constanza Leza, Sebastian Puerto, Andrea Rozo, Alessandra Fillis, Jordan Ferguson and Georgie Rawson.

For the West U parks Nearly 600 West University Place neighbors and friends joined for La Fête du Jardin, “The Garden Party.” The 28th annual Park Lovers’ Ball raised $425,000. Event (continued on page 54) WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 52

Watch Their Smiles Grow

Oral healthcare for the growing & developing child Joel J. Vela, D.D.S. Bellaire Pediatric Dentistry, P.A. 6750 West Loop South, Suite 795 713.661.1100 • www.bellairesmiles.com

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 53

Catchlight Photography

Aggarwal, Amelia Kusinski, Luke Nanna, Evan Nanna and Chloe Plusquellac.

Jeff Grass Photography

Enchanted evening

(continued from page 52) co-chairs

(pictured) Jennifer and Scott Allison, Stephanie and Ryan Fleck, Caroline and Kevin Walter, and Megan and Brian Cushing created a memorable evening, which included a living topiary who posed for photos with guests. Honorees were John and Andrea Young. Décor co-chairs Stacey Christ and Jennifer Swallen fulfilled the vision of a French-themed garden party. Artist Angela Fabbri painted live, and emcee was Ilona Carson of ABC 13. Auction co-chairs were Jessie Cutler and Michele Marandi.

Underwriting and sponsorship co-chairs were Kim Eads and Emily Yardley. Doppelganger kept guests dancing until midnight.

Episcopal’s Fiddler

George Brock

Episcopal High School performed their spring musical, Fiddler on the Roof. It was the first time

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 54

the school has presented Fiddler, as it’s a challenging piece to perform, said George Brock, the school’s theatre program coordinator. Senior Max Dubose played Tevia (the father and main character), and sophomore Gwen Diaz played Golda (the mother). Brock said it took a lot of YouTube watching for the students to pull off the old Yiddish accent. See "'Fiddler on the Roof': A Night of Firsts at Episcopal High School" by Andria Frankfort at thebuzzmagazines.com for more details and photos.

West U Odyssey champs These West University Elementary School fifth graders won first place at the state competition for Odyssey of the Mind. They’re heading to the world competition this month at Michigan State University. Pictured are (from left) Caroline Thompson, Reese Sicinski, Libby

Houston Chamber Choir’s 2019 gala, Some Enchanted Evening, honored longtime patrons Fairfax Randall and Risher Randall. Cece Fowler and Mack Fowler (pictured) served as co-chairs. Music lovers mingled at the Petroleum Club downtown. Pre-dinner entertainment was provided by the Marvin Gaspard Duo. Arts and culture expert St. John Flynn served as master of cere- (continued on page 56)

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 55

Houston Chamber Choir members provided entertainment. The audience enjoyed music from Rodgers’ and Hammerstein’s South Pacific, including “Some Enchanted Evening” as the finale. Nearly $130,000 was raised.

Leah Wilson Photography

Clays Classic

Friendly competition at the fourth annual Lupe Tortilla Clays Classic raised more than $165,000. Since its inaugural year, the Clays Classic has raised over $750,000 for the PTSD Foundation of America and Camp Hope, an organization dedicated to helping veterans and their families find healing through mentoring programs. Pictured are (from left) Brent Dishman, Stan Faison and Sandi Faison.

Happy hour, happy birthday A happy-hour birthday celebration for Lili Rubin was held at Blue Bar at Brenners on the

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 56

Bayou shortly before she and boyfriend Dennis Langlois took off for the Mexican Riviera.

Dennis was the only guy with 13 women at the bar. Pictured are (clockwise, from left) Lynda Johnson, Loralee Windrim, Roma Millice, Sue Feinberg, Michele Hosko, Amy Grenader, Rosanne Kaufmann, Lindy Kahn, Mady Kades, Barbara Marcus, Lili Rubin and Sharon Brier. Not pictured: Joan Lebow.

Adventures in Australia

Meryl Gibbs (pictured, at left) has been living in Sydney for the last year and a half on a recent engineering graduate visa. Longtime friends Avery Landrum (middle) and Mary Helen Johns (right), who graduated with Meryl from St. John’s School, took the opportunity to visit.

Their adventures included touring the botanical

gardens, Opera House and Circular Quay. They took the Bondi to the Coogee coastal walk and went to Taronga Zoo. In Perth, they visited wine regions and beaches, and the Bunbury Dolphin Center. Here, the friends are pictured in Albany, a city at the southern tip of Western Australia.

Celebrating survivors Kevin McGowan

(continued from page 54) monies.

CanCare will present its 25th Silver Anniversary Cancer Survivors Day Luncheon on May 9 at The Westin Houston, Memorial City. This year’s keynote speaker will be Frank Billingsley, KPRC’s chief meteorologist. Luncheon co-chairs are Kay and George A. Kurisky, Jr. Pictured are Tracy Jones, Carli Jones and Elizabeth Weaver at a previous luncheon.

Be seen in Buzz About Town. Send your high-res photos and community news to info@thebuzzmagazines.com.

Items are published on a space-available basis. Also share your upcoming-event listings on thebuzzmagazines.com.

Present this ad during the month of May and receive a complimentary Queso Fundido (one per table) 5427 Bissonnet Street, Suite 200 832-623-6467 www.saltillomexicankitchen.com Mon-Fri 11 am – 10 pm | Sat 12 pm – 10 pm WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 57

NEIGHBORS

.

by Andria Frankfort, staff writer

Back Porch

Do parents really want to know everything?

WEST UNIVERSITY BUZZ MAY 2019 58

behance.net/runamokstudios

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any years ago, when I was a sophomore in college, my parents came to visit. We wound up, as we often did during their visits, at dinner at Commander’s Palace. It was one of those nights when everyone sort of syncs, and conversation is non-stop and lively. I’m guessing it must have been after a couple of cocktails, but somehow we got on the subject of the things I had done in high school and hadn’t told them about – like the time I walked through the door one Saturday night and looked at my parents, who were reading in the family room, and said, “Hi! If the police call, it wasn’t me.”

Anyway, the night went on and on, sitting there in the Commander’s dining room, as I unearthed all the stories I had never shared with my parents before. We laughed all night, and it became one of those moments we would talk about for years to come.

But recently, I’ve been comparing that night to my current situation. Suddenly, I have my own college student, and I’m really not sure how much I want to hear. This one has always been a talker – when she came home to visit for the first time, we laughed because I accidentally said out loud, “I forgot how much you talk!” And that’s been a great asset to a mom. Maybe until now?

My parents tell me I am so lucky that my child shares so much with me, and I know that is true. But sometimes knowing too much about what happens on Saturday nights is knowing too much. I’m not that cool.

Thinking about all of this made me wonder if I am the only parent struggling with whether or not we want to hear it all.

“Sometimes our daughter will be in the middle of a story,” one couple says of their college freshman, “and she’ll go, ‘Why am I telling you all of this?’ It’s because she wants to, and that’s good!”

They cite the example of a recent weekend, when the daughter called on a Sunday to say she had “had fun and met a boy” at a party. “We’re happy about that,” the parents say, “but then we saw the pictures of what she wore and had to have the conversation of, ‘What kind of message are you sending when you wear that?’ And she

LISTENING – CALMLY Parents want their kids to trust them as confidantes, but sometimes it takes willpower to remain objective and calm.

[the daughter] says, ‘Guys, I’m fine,’ and then we look at each other and think, ‘Could we really handle it if she told us everything?’ We want to hear the story, but then we get the texts of the late-night pictures…”

Then there are the parents who wish they could just get something. A mother of three boys in their late-teens and early-20s says, “I have friends who come talk to me because they don’t know anything that’s going on [with their kids and their friends], but they know, ‘If I talk to her, I’ll find out,’ because my kids are talking.

But I can also say that some of those parents who don’t get anything out of their kids really don’t want to know.”

Another father of two teens and a 10 year old says he thinks the kids are telling us things to gauge our reactions. “They use us as a sounding board and then decide by our reactions if what they’re talking about is okay or not. They still

need us to guide them, and they’ve got to tell us what is going on so that we can do that.”

The bottom line for one mother of a college freshman and a recent college graduate is that when the kids go to college, the parents become consultants. “We prepared you to go out into the world, and now we are here on a consultant basis,” she tells her kids. “We can’t tell you when to go to bed and when to go in and out, and we have to be okay with you – our client – telling us whatever you need to in order to consult with us. We want them to trust us enough to talk to us. If they don’t share, we can’t consult with them anymore.”

Put it that way, and I’m all in for any kind of consulting that my child needs, and any sharing that goes with it. Even if it means putting aside my own memories of young adulthood and mustering – from very deep inside – all the calm and collected willpower I’ve got.

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