The Burr Magazine — Spring 2019

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

THEBURR.COM | 1

On your mark. Get set. GO!

Get a head start on your career!

Human Services & Social Sciences Students, Coleman offers: Volunteer Opportunities Internships Employment Positions

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24/7 Crisis Help—877-796-3555 or text Help to 741-741

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

TABLE OF

CONTENTS CAMPUS 7

PROCRASTINATION: WHY WE DO IT AND HOW TO STOP

A look at the psychology behind procrastination.

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IS GRADUATE SCHOOL BAD FOR YOUR (MENTAL) HEALTH?

At one of the lowest paid graduate programs in Ohio, students are struggling.

COMMUNITY 16

SILVER & SCENTS AND MESSAGES FROM GOD

Laurie runs an artistic boutique in Acorn Alley and occasionally shares words from God. 19

FEATURES

ON THE MENU: NOVELTY DRINKS

Try some unusual beverages from local businesses.

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Stretch your vocal chords any night of the week at these local performances.

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BURNOUT

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Of the many issues millennials are facing, burnout is near the top.

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OUT OF THE BOX: THE BEST SUBSCRIPTION BOXES FOR YOUR MONEY

KENT STATE’S STUDENT BILLS HIDE THE COST OF ATHLETICS

Find out how much you’re paying Kent State in obscured fees every semester.

CURRENT 24

ANXIETY IN THE AGE OF BIRTH CONTROL

A journey into the worry-filled world of contraceptives.

MEET THE GIRLS WHO CREATED GUYS NIGHT

The two-woman duo Marble discuss their friendship and the DJ industry.

DANCERS WANTED

Kent’s only strip club aims to entertain.

THE BEST OPEN MIC NIGHTS IN KENT

HALF A WORLD AWAY

Take a trip across the world to Florence, Italy and Chengdu, China.

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THE GRASS COULD BE GREENER

Changing our habits changes our environment.

A sneak peek into trending subscription boxes.

HOMME Q&A

LIVING ON CAMPUS AFFECTS STUDENTS’ MENTAL HEALTH

Talking with the creators of Kent State’s men’s fashion club.

For some college students, living in a new space with a roommate affects their mental health.

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GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN HITS HOME

Students struggle in the aftermath of the shutdown.

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A CULT CLOSE TO HOME

A Kent student recounts her time in what she believes is a religious cult.

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

MEGAN AYSCUE Editor-in-Chief

ABOUT THE BURR

READ

FOLLOW US

The Burr Magazine is the first student-produced magazine for Kent State University, the city of Kent and anyone looking for strong, journalistic storytelling. The Burr strives to provide its readers with interesting, humorous and hard-hitting stories that tap into current events, trends and the lives of those who have made a home in Kent.

Find past issues of The Burr Magazine online at issuu.com/theburr

@THEBURRMAGAZINE

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Published with support of Kent State and the Kent Community. No part of The Burr Magazine may be reprinted or published without permission. Š 2019 The Burr Magazine. 330-672-2572 | theburrmagazine@gmail.com

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

MEET THE

STAFF EDITORIAL BOARD COPY EDITORS

PHOTOGRAPHERS

Nina Palattella Sara Crawford

Kamryn Rowe Sophia Adornetto Sophia DelCiappo Anna Lawrence Stephanie Nguyen Jenna Breedlove Bobbi Broome

WRITERS

Megan Ayscue

Shelbie Goulding

Editor-in-Chief

Managing Editor

Taylor Robinson Puja Mohan Cheyenne Petitpas Paige Bennett Abigail Miller Amanda Levine BLOGGERS

Puja Mohan Cheyenne Petipas Paige Bennett Sarah Riedlinger

Mark Tabar

DESIGNERS

Art Director

Assistant Art Director

Cameron Luiza Mary Wagner Elliot Burr Imana Onipe

Collin Cunningham

Cameron Gorman

Senior Editor

Senior Editor

ILLUSTRATORS

Sophia DelCiappo Elliot Burr Mark Tabar A/V REPORTERS

Kamryn Rowe Cassandra Beattie Oma Durunna CONTRIBUTING WRITER

Lyric Aquino

ADVISER

BUSINESS MANAGER

Jacqueline Marino

Norma Young

DIRECTOR

SALES MANAGER

Kevin Dilley

Christian Caudill

MEDIA SPECIALIST

OFFICE MANAGER

Jacyna Peña

Lorie Bednar

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR OF STUDENT MEDIA Tessa Poulain

Taylor Robinson

Photo Editor

Copy Desk Chief

Tami Bongiorni

Laura Keller

Promotions Director

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STATE OF THE UNIVERSITY

WORDS BY Megan Ayscue PHOTO BY Tessa Poulain

A

photo by Sophia DelCiappo

LTHOUGH THE GROUP started as an underground movement, Black United Students (BUS) became an official student organization in 1968. Starting as a place where black students could gather and find comfort, the group fully formed in response to the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. The goal of BUS is to educate as well as celebrate black culture, and to cultivate a space for black students to be themselves. It was also one of the first student organizations of its kind.

MILITARY FRIENDLY FOR 10 YEARS

Kent State has been named a Military Friendly campus for 10 consecutive years. Along with the Kent Campus, Stark, Trumbull and Salem also received the 2019-2020 Military Friendly School designation.

Salem even received a Top 10 School Award and gold-level distinction in the small public schools category. These ratings come from VIQTORY Media, a veteran-owned business.

In the years since its founding, BUS has accomplished many feats. The group demanded a building be dedicated to black men and women, which led to the naming of Oscar Ritchie Hall after the first African-American faculty member at Kent State. BUS was also the first student group to propose a full month to celebrate black history, rather than just a week.

Beyond this, BUS lead to the creation of several other student organizations, such as the Spanish and Latino Student Association (SALSA), where students can continue to celebrate their heritage, and programs like the Institute for African American Affairs Center for Pan African Culture and the PanAfrican department.

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photo courtesy of Eric Mansfield / Air Force ROTC

THROUGH THE LENS

photo courtesy of Melanie Nesteruk / The Kent Stater

PRESIDENT BEVERLY WARREN LEAVING

After starting at Kent State in 2014, President Beverly Warren is leaving. In an email to students she wrote, “This has not been an easy decision,” and continued, “I will be forever grateful for this opportunity to lead such a loving and welcoming institution – a university where all are valued and where the future of higher education is being transformed today for a brighter tomorrow.

From the bottom of my heart, I thank you for allowing me to share these special years together with each of you.” The search for a replacement is ongoing.

POLICE DOG CELEBRATES 5 YEARS

Coco, a 7-year-old German Shepard, celebrated her fifth year with the Kent State police force. Coco had the honor of being the first police dog at Kent State and is now accompanied by Dexter, a Belgian Malinois. Starting in 2013 at two (human) years old, Coco joined the force as an evidence search and recovery dog but mostly does explosives detection, the job she was predominately trained for.

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

PROCRASTINATION: WHY WE DO IT AND HOW TO STOP Researchers discuss the negative effects that come with waiting till the last minute.

WORDS BY Paige Bennett ILLUSTRATION BY Sophia DelCiappo

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ATHERINE SWANK, a junior majoring in accounting, does everything she can to stay on top of her schoolwork, but sometimes she can’t help but procrastinate.

In addition, Ganga Bhandari, a senior majoring in nursing, says the heavy workload students experience in college can sometimes make it impossible to not procrastinate.

“There’s definitely been times where I’ve had to stay up way later than I would have [wanted] to finish off an assignment before it was due,” Swank says.

“When you have two or three exams a day, it’s too much,” Bhandari says.

Procrastination is a widespread issue among students. According to research unveiled at the Procrastination Research Conference in 2017, one in five people is a chronic procrastinator.

For many students, procrastination seems to be an unavoidable consequence of being in college. Swank believes procrastination can be hard to avoid because students have more control over their schedules than they did in the past.

Grace Vonder Brink, a senior majoring in Spanish translation and a tutor at Kent State’s Student Support Services, frequently works with students who have issues with procrastination.

Vonder Brink says she once had a student who came in for a session looking for help with a paper that was due in less than two hours.

Vonder Brink believes students overestimate their ability to get assignments done quickly, which puts them in positions where they have no option other than to procrastinate.

“You have, in general, more free time [in college]. In high school, your time is more structured,” Swank says.

“A lot of people think they can get it done quicker than they do or they just tend to put it off … and all of a sudden, the deadline hits them,” Vonder Brink says.

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WHY DO SOME PROCRASTINATE? Although the majority of college students procrastinate, some are more likely to put off tasks than others. Procrastination often emerges in people with poor time management skills, says John Dunlosky, a professor in Kent State’s Department of Psychological Sciences.

Some students put off assignments and cram before exams because they believe they perform better under pressure. While the stress of a fast-approaching deadline may give students the motivation to push through and get an assignment done, Steel says it is not the most effective practice.

“If you don’t have good time management skills,” Dunlosky says, “it’s natural to wait till the last moment.”

Steel encourages people who wait until the last minute to consider two questions: “Would [the assignment] be better if you would have started earlier?” and “If I could give you that motivation way before the deadline, would you want it?”

Procrastination can also be a product of impulsiveness, says Piers Steel, a professor in the Department of Organizational Behaviour and Human Resources at the University of Calgary.

Steel runs a research lab devoted to procrastination and wrote a book in 2012 on the subject, “The Procrastination Equation.”

Steel says people have a tendency to focus on the present rather than the future, and procrastination happens because they prioritize small, immediate rewards over large, delayed ones.

This is a concept known as hyperbolic discounting. “[Procrastination] gets its power from immediacy,” Steel says.

The structure of college can worsen procrastination, says Amanda Shah, the assistant director of Kent State’s Academic Success Center.

“A lot of students procrastinate because they haven’t yet learned how to project manage,” Shah says.

Shah explains that in high school, students can mostly rely on teachers to guide them and provide them with study tools.

However, when they get to college, they no longer have that same level of support, making it easy for them to feel lost or overwhelmed.

“Students sometimes get worse in college when it comes to procrastination because there’s not as much guidance and there aren’t as many study tools,” Shah says.

While it might be unavoidable at times, procrastination can have a negative impact on a student’s ability to learn material and prepare for exams, Dunlosky explains.

“What our research [shows] is that waiting ‘till the last moment to study is not an effective strategy,” he says.

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

“What our research [shows] is that waiting ‘till the last moment to study is not an effective strategy.”

– JOHN DUNLOSKY

Steel says these questions show that although people may think they work better with time constraints, their procrastination habits leave them with no other option.

“Those who say they perform best at the last minute have not had much experience working any other way,” Christine Li, a clinical psychologist and procrastination coach based in New York City, writes in an email.

Another downside to completing work right before its deadline is that it does not allow students the opportunity to fully absorb information.

“In order to really process and understand information, you need time,” Shah says.

In addition, Shah says rushing to finish an assignment can sometimes cause students to overlook things and make careless mistakes because they are not allowing themselves to thoroughly comprehend the material.

For many, the tendency to procrastinate stems from a desire to avoid disappointing their own expectations. Dunlosky explains that procrastination can act as a “built-in excuse” students use to explain why they do poorly on projects and exams. Rather than start an assignment as soon as it is given out and gradually work on it over an extended period of time, chronic procrastinators may delay their work until the last minute so they can preserve their egos upon receiving a bad grade. This behavior affords students the opportunity to blame failures on a lack of time management skills instead of a lack of academic skills.

PROBLEMS LINKED TO PROCRASTINATION

include feelings of hopelessness, fatigue and a lack of energy and concentration. These symptoms can make it harder for people to stay motivated when it comes to their work, often resulting in procrastination. While procrastination does not cause depression, people who suffer from mental health issues, including depression, are more likely to procrastinate.

HOW TO STOP For those looking to procrastinate less, Steel says the first thing they must do is give themselves a break. Procrastination can be challenging to overcome, and students should not be ashamed of it.

“You’ve got to forgive yourself for being a procrastinator,” Steel says.

Steel recommends students keep potential distractors, such as cell phones, at least a few feet away when they are trying to do work. By putting distance between themselves and their devices, students can decrease the temptation to frequently check them.

Dunlosky advises students to focus on improving their time management skills. Establishing specific times for work, keeping a planner, rewarding oneself for completing tasks and setting deadlines can help reduce the likelihood that one will procrastinate.

Shah also suggests that students create task lists, which they can use to track their progress and split large assignments into smaller, more manageable pieces.

“Starting to create and use a task list every day is really helpful and helps break down study times into smaller pieces,” Shah says.

A common misconception about procrastination is that it reduces an individual’s overall stress level. Some procrastinators assume delaying major tasks will allow them to compartmentalize their stress. Although it may seem that way, research reveals that chronic procrastinators not only have higher stress levels, but they are also more vulnerable to hypertension and cardiovascular disease.

Additionally, Shah advises students to use the “Pomodoro Technique,” a time management strategy that encourages people work into 25-minute intervals and intersperse periods of work with short breaks.

In addition, procrastination has been linked to mental health issues, such as depression. Common symptoms of depression

PAIGE BENNETT | pbennet8@kent.edu

The key to avoiding procrastination, Shah says, is to start small and gradually “build that inertia and get over that hump.”

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CAMPUS

IS GRADUATE SCHOOL BAD FOR YOUR (MENTAL) HEALTH? The percentage of graduate students who experience moderate to severe symptoms of anxiety and depression is more than three times the general population average.

WORDS BY Abigail Miller PHOTOS BY Kamryn Rowe

Q

UIETLY WORKING ALONE inside the basement of Kent State’s Science Research Building is Mitch Powers, a doctoral candidate in physics. It’s just past noon, but Powers has been in the lab since early morning working on the mundane task of moving a little bit of material from one end of a small tube to the other.

On top of a thesis or dissertation, graduate students are commonly required to teach and conduct research. Students teaching courses are only compensated for the 20 hours they are required to work. This means that when students have to work overtime in order to get all of their research, teaching and coursework done, as they often do, they aren’t being paid.

Currently in his sixth year of graduate studies, Powers knows better than most what being a graduate student can do to one’s mental health.

“There’s kind of a disconnect between the work we do and the work we’re paid for,” Powers says. “I know grad students who are the instructor on record of two classes, if not more, at once and on top of that they have to do their own research, and I’m sure they have other small responsibilities on top of that. They’re doing the work of an adjunct professor – in some cases they’re even called adjunct professors – while still working on their dissertations and they’re getting paid, say, $14,000 a year.”

“Grad students generally are overworked, underpaid and if we don’t have a great relationship with our advisor, it’s easy for us to get overstressed about things,” he says. “Depression is a real thing and impostor syndrome [a psychological issue in which people are unable to internalize their accomplishments] is a real thing.”

In addition to being paid below the poverty line, graduate students frequently feel that their work isn’t crucial to their department. In fact, Harvard found only 26 percent of students report thinking their work is useful always or most of the time.

A report by Harvard University published last November found the widespread presence of depression and anxiety seen in doctoral students is comparable to the prevalence in incarcerated populations, with loneliness and isolation cited as major issues. “There’s a lot of faith on my part that this is all going to be worth it and work out,” Powers says. “A lot of it is it can take so long, These feelings are often attributed to grad students’ indepen- and we spend so much time on the immediate problem we have dent projects that start after several years of class work, which at hand that it can very much feel like we’re rolling boulders includes a thesis for master’s students and a dissertation for up hills. It’s not even that they roll back down, it’s that there’s doctoral students. always another boulder to roll up another hill.”

“So many of them, they’ve had maybe three, four, five years of coursework and a cohort with their fellow graduate students, and have built a really nice community with their colleagues there,” Director of Graduate Student Services, Kyle Reynolds, says. “But, then you start your dissertation and everyone is working on these independent projects. You don’t see your colleagues as much.”

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To be a graduate student at any college campus is to worry about money. But to be a Kent State graduate student, one of the lowest paid graduate students in the state of Ohio, is to worry more than usual.

At last year’s graduate student orientation, Tim Rose, a doctoral candidate in sociology, conducted a survey and found that the median income of students was less than their median expen-

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

Graduate students today struggle more with their mental health than the average population due to feelings of unimportance, loneliness, significant underpayment and isolation.

The widespread presence of depression and anxiety found in doctoral students is comparable to the prevalence found in incarcerated populations, with loneliness and isolation cited as major issues.

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CAMPUS

“We spend so much time on the immediate problem we have at hand that it can very much feel like we’re rolling boulders up hills. It’s not even that they roll back down, it’s that there’s always another boulder to roll up another hill.”

– MITCH POWERS

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

ditures. This means most graduate students aren’t making enough money to pay for their minimum expenses.

The recent findings from Rose’s survey caused Graduate Student Services to add a new phase to their graduate orientation that specializes in helping students navigate their financial issues.

“The top concern that we saw this year from our students was related to finances as a graduate student,” Reynolds says. “Our team put together a new session about graduate student finances, and identified places in the community and on campus where students can save money and if they have financial setbacks.”

Not only has Graduate Student Services adjusted their programs because of worsening mental health concerns, but so has the Graduate Student Senate. During the spring of 2018, the GSS proposed the creation of a sub-committee focused on health and wellness. The new committee is led by Carolyn Good, a graduate student working toward a masters in health education and promotion, and includes a small group of eight members.

From engaging in healthy eating to orchestrating a day focused on graduate student self-care, Good says the Committee wants students to understand that it’s okay to relax.

“One of the main things that we really wanted to do was remind people it’s okay to breathe,” she says. “You know, just little things here and there, helping people get through the week.”

A great aspect of being a college student is the potential the atmosphere gives you to meet new people and make new friends within your department. However, once you progress to graduate studies, there’s often little to no time to relax and be social.

“Two spring breaks ago, I was visiting friends in California, and the entire time I kept grading papers and writing things down and responding to professors’ emails,” Powers says. “Even if we do relax, we’re one email away from being thrown back into the middle of things.”

Being a graduate student is like being an undergraduate student two times over. It includes long hours of research and coursework, commonly coupled with teaching responsibilities and little to no social life, all crumpled together in a small wad of nearly no cash.

“I’m not a senator,” Good says, “but they proposed the idea of the sub-committee because they realized that there was such a need for it, and I volunteered to lead it because, at the time, I had the most experience in the health education field in the Graduate Student Senate who was willing to do so.”

“It’s working on a project for between two and five years that you really don’t get a lot out of until the very end,” Powers says.

Due to the amount of preparation last semester, the committee “It’s a lot of just rolling boulders up hills.” is just now planning their first events. This semester, their focus was on hosting a nutrition event in late March right ABIGAIL MILLER | amill241@kent.edu before spring break as well as a few self-care days during the first week of May. Tasks which most people would consider ordinary, like cooking dinner and taking time to relax, typically aren’t prioritized by graduate students because they’re often busy with work.

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by Sophia DelCiappo

PATHBORN WORDS BY Stephanie Walker Just beyond the miniature forest, the one that divides this town in half, lies a garden. Once you step inside, you are rendered invisible to all: the flora and fauna, the ghosts of dead trees, the other visiting mortals, memories you have left behind. Your sins and secrets are cast in color – all that you hid and was hidden from

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you illuminated by the sun that is always, curiously, shining, even when this corner of the world goes dark. The sleeping daisies blink themselves awake, sensing your footsteps at the forest’s end, and nod eastward, the stillest of synchronies. This is where you go.

READ MORE

On stands now! lunanegramag.com

Luna Negra is a student-run Literary Arts Magazine on campus. For more, visit lunanegramag.com and look for its new issue on stands Spring 2019.

Let the College of the Arts Help Transform Your Life Through the Arts The College of the Arts invites all full-time, undergraduate students to enjoy a theatre production, dance concert or choose from a huge variety of music events for FREE. Every student receives one FREE TICKET to each and every event (or almost!).

More than 100 full-time faculty members ART Art History Art Education Fine Art/Crafts MUSIC Composition Music Education Music Performance FASHION Fashion Design Fashion Merchandising THEATRE AND DANCE Theatre Studies Musical Theatre Design and Technology Dance Performance

Simply call or visit the Performing Arts Box Office to reserve your tickets. Did we mention your ticket would be

FREE?!

Visit www.kent.edu/artscollege for a full listing of events each semester.

CONTACT: Performing Arts Box Office Roe Green Center Lobby Center for Performing Arts Call: 330-672-2787 Visit: Noon – 5 p.m. weekdays

TRANSFORMING LIVES THROUGH THE ARTS @artsatKSU

College of the Arts Kent State University, Kent State and KSU are registered trademarks and may not be used without permission. Kent State University, an equal opportunity, affirmative action employer, is committed to attaining excellence through the recruitment and retention of a diverse workforce. 15-cota-00146-020

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COOL STUFF Visit any of our websites & click the “shop” tab to search our available items.

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COMMUNITY

SILVER & SCENTS (AND MESSAGES FROM GOD) WORDS BY Shelbie Goulding PHOTOS BY Tessa Poulain

A

N ABUNDANCE of musty yet pleas- name, and she responds, “I heard it from God ing smells hit me like a wave as I open calling me that and then I found it existed in the blue door of a small shop in Acorn different languages and places on earth.” I Alley. The first two things I notice are the over- nod at her response and go on to ask what bearing amount of oils creating the thick kind of store Silver & Scents is. aroma, and the sterling silver jewelry set upon many shelves and tables to my right. The sign “It’s an artistic boutique store,” Laurie says.

“Silver & Scents” does not lie. A fixture of over “It’s geared to be accommodating to all walks a hundred sterling silver earrings catches my of life, all kinds of people, whether they’re eye on a rotating stand. The pairs are a mix of conservative or spiritual. But to appreciate authentic and bohemian styles representing the store, you got to be artistic.” The store is different cultures. As my eyes wander the inti- all things art, beauty and health – everything mate shop, I notice it carries a lot of cultural that’s good for a person. Laurie continues and spiritual items, especially art. talking about how she sells over 500 sets of oils and most of her items are made with real I hear a woman’s voice coming from behind stones, one of the store’s specialties. the shelves where an office space is hidden. I make my way back, passing the shelves of oils She’s been in Kent for almost 10 years, but and candles, to find a woman sitting at a desk she’s had her business for almost 30. “It can going through various-sized packages con- be busy, it’s got its own dance,” Laurie says taining even more boxes of merchandise wait- about her shop’s circulation. “There’s no loging to be opened. She’s wearing a long brown ical factor as to how things go, so you just velvet skirt with a brown spaghetti strap tank got to be filled with faith, which is what I’m top pulled over a long-sleeved turquoise shirt. learning to do. It’s like our weather, you just A charcoal headband pulls her white-blonde never know.” hair out of her face, revealing a grin and steady eyes looking up at me.

Suddenly, Laurie asks me, “Do you like taking pictures?” I’m confused, thinking she thought Laurie, who prefers not to share her last name, I was going to take pictures of her. I assure also goes by a spirit name, Zalla. To her, the her I didn’t have a camera and wasn’t planname Zalla means “energy channeled from ning on taking pictures of her today. She asks higher realms or heavenly realms into the again but asks if I have a physical camera or earth.” I ask her how she came to get such a if I use my phone for taking pictures. I tell

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her I use my phone. She looks down at the package she’s handling. “Sometimes things come to me, and when they come to me I pass on the information. I believe that I’m used as a message giver by God. Anyway…”

This just took a turn. I’m taken by surprise and she has my full attention now. I ask what she means by “a message giver.”

“I don’t know, things just come to me out of the blue,” Laurie says. “I can’t do it on purpose, but when I’m supposed to tell someone something, it’s just ‘boom’ right there. And for you, it’s just ‘camera.’”

To be fair, she’s not wrong. I always wanted a nice camera I could use to be a photojournalist, but it’s expensive. Laurie repeats that I should get one. “Take it for what it’s worth.

I don’t get messages in complete sentences, but maybe you should buy a camera.”

“Also, garden! Do you like nature?” I tell her I love to hike and camp, but I don’t garden

Symbolic necklaces hang in Silver & Scents featuring the “Tree of Life.”

unless I’m home helping my mother with her garden. “Well you could plant flowers or something like that,” she says. I jot down notes wondering if I watered the iris sitting in the center of my table back at home.

“And the ocean, do you like the ocean?” Laurie asks. Suddenly I feel as if I’m the one being interviewed. I tell her I’d rather be in the mountains than on a beach, but I do like the ocean. She asks if I was going to the ocean for spring break, and I say I’m not. “You’re gonna be visiting the ocean soon.” She’s starting to get my hopes up that I’ll be on a cruise or laying on a beach somewhere, but I don’t think it will happen.

As her messages seem to slow down, I go back to observing the store. It’s unique with various cultures spread along the walls, shelves and ceiling. “There’s stuff from India, Indonesia, Thailand, Peru … I mean, God only knows where this stuff comes from,” Laurie says. “I do wish I had more stuff from Africa.” The store also carries boots, scarves, hats, gloves, tops and bottoms. There’s something for everyone, or at least things Laurie believes people will like.

says it’s been happening since she was young and it took her years until she “figured herself out.” “Mostly I’m used by God to help people realize their abilities and talents,” Laurie says.

She says she feels the need to share the messages with the person they’re for because “the more you use your ability, the more you’re flourishing.”

My curious mind wonders what she means by God and the religion she follows. “I use the word ‘god’ as an ultimate source of holy divin“You know, you should really think about get- ity in which life brings forth,” Laurie says. ting a camera,” she says again while rustling “That’s how I use that word. I do lean toward through packages. Baffled by her continuously Christianity because I feel the presence of going back to me getting a camera, I ask when Jesus. I have recognition and realizations, and these messages started coming to her. She I haven’t figured out yet if Jesus is spiritual or, in a Christian sense, my savior. I do feel the literal presence of Jesus at times, and it’s kind of in my soul.”

“I believe that I’m used as a message giver by God.”

– LAURIE

Growing up, her household wasn’t religious.

She was born Jewish, but doesn’t recall her parents ever talking about God. “We just did the traditional holidays and were sent to

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COMMUNITY

Saturday school.” She says she found God on her own. “I have some visionary stuff that happens sometimes,” she says about her messages, but it’s hard to put into words. “It’s not something I like to exploit. I have to be super humble when it comes to gifts and messages from God. You can’t really get your ego in there. It’s meant to be sacred.”

I notice a shelf covered in stones and crystals says. “I don’t preach to people. I just mention on the left side of the store. “Ever since I was the words that come to me. However you young, I’d go to my mother’s jewelry box and apply it or don’t apply it, it’s just fine.” I reasput on different stones and I’d feel different sure her that I don’t mind her sharing her with each stone,” Laurie says. “For me, it’s an thoughts with me. experiential thing. Everything I wear is because of a feeling I get from it.” She’s wear- “Do you exercise or work out?” Laurie asks as ing more than three crystal necklaces around I’m about to leave. I tell her that I run a lot, her neck along with various stone bracelets and she says the word gym came to mind. “It “Why am I feeling like you’re going to be on a covering a third of her forearm. felt more like g-y-m and not j-i-m.” I laugh beach?” Laurie asks me. I laugh and tell her and tell her it’s probably because I need to go I don’t know but I hope it happens soon.

Laurie says customers come in asking what soon. “It makes you feel better, right?” I say each stone is supposed to do, or if a stone does yes because running helps me relax and As I attempt to walk around the store and what someone else says it’s supposed to. “It’s reduces my stress. She grins as if she knew observe the oils and incense, Laurie has almost like they’re killing it to me,” she says. what I was going to say and continues to another message come to her.

“It’s almost too exploitive because I tell people unpack her products. the truth.” She tells customers that she “Did you ever play any musical instrument?” believes each person has their own personal I walk back to the entrance and continue to she asks. I tell her I have no musical bone in relationship with a particular stone. Which observe the shop one last time. On the left my body. “Piano? Why am I seeing the word means each stone gives each person a differ- side of the store, I notice she has reading piano?” she asks. I shrug and laugh without ent feeling or energy; it’s not the same feeling cards hidden on a shelf that touches the floor an answer. “I wish they’d come in complete for everyone. “Everyone has their own expe- next to a small chest. I ask her what oracle sentences, but it just comes up.” She thinks rience, so I encourage people to feel them and cards were like, and she says I should try one maybe I need to play or listen to piano music what they’re drawn to is what’s good for them.” for fun. I walk back over to her as she pulls a more. Laurie feels like she has a responsi- She says she’s always liked the spiritual feel- deck out from her desk. “Stand a little closer,” bility to mention the message in case some- ing of the stones, so she got involved and she says. As she shuffles the deck, she tries to thing is coming or happens. She doesn’t started selling them. tap into my aura in order to pick the card that know what it could be, the messages only resonates with it. “I’m feeling this one,” she come in one word.

“Now I’m seeing the word prayer. I’m sup- says without looking at the card. posed to mention the word prayer,” Laurie “Pueo, Guardian of the Aumakua,” the card reads. It’s Hawaiian and is meant to be the The storefront of Silver & Scents, located in Acorn Alley of guardian owl spirit. Laurie hands me a book Downtown Kent, offers only a glimpse of what can be found inside. to look up the meaning of my card. It’s a powerful protection of the soul securing safe passage through a challenge and into fulfillment. Honestly, I have no idea what that means for me, and neither does Laurie, but I’m interested to see if this actually makes sense in my future.

I left Silver & Scents with the experience still swirling in my mind. I learned more than I planned about Laurie and still wonder who she is. I leave with various scents knit into my shirt and thoughts woven through my brain. Should I get a camera if God wants me to, or am I really going to a beach soon? I wonder whether or not a piano is going to drop on my head, and maybe I should pray it doesn’t. Ultimately, all this uncertainty and strangeness has me worked up, but one word, one message, will come to fruition: I’m going to head to the g-y-m for a relaxing j-o-g.

SHELBIE GOULDING | sgouldi1@kent.edu

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

ON THE MENU:

NOVELTY DRINKS

WORDS & PHOTOS BY Sarah Riedlinger

If you’re looking to try something new or plain-out weird in downtown Kent, you don’t have to look far – here are four of the wackiest drinks you can order from local businesses.

TARO SLUSH $4.75

@ Kenko Sushi + Teriyaki The Taiwanese drink known as bubble tea has been all the rage in Kent for the past year, and Kenko is no stranger to the game. Not only can you get a variety of flavors, but you can get the milk teas in “slush” form, similar to a smoothie. There are many customizations possible, but one popular choice is the taro flavored bubble tea that originates from a purple colored potato root and is sweet in taste.

SANGRIA IN-A-POUCH

$3.99

@ Tree City Coffee

Yep, you read that right – if you’re over 21, you can enjoy a relaxing drink of wine at Tree City Coffee, and it doesn’t even have to be served in a glass.

You can drink it straight out of a plastic pouch shaped like a bottle. The top of the “bottle” tears off, and then you can drink the fruity beverage straight from the pouch. It’s reminiscent of childhood years filled with Capri Sun pouches, keeping all the fun and adding a mature twist.

COOKIE DOUGH BITES SODA

$3.00

@ Sugar Rush

The name “Sugar Rush” is definitely no joke – the array of syrup-filled drinks and Japanese candies that fill the store are enough to make anyone jittery. Among the wall of joke drinks such as “Dirt Soda” and “Butter Soda” is another called “Cookie Dough Bites Soda” that will peak the interest of any chocolate lover. Golden yellow in color, this drink tastes strongly of butterscotch with the fizziness of root beer.

MATCHA + ESPRESSO JR. BOLTZ

$3.50

@ Scribbles Coffee Co.

Step aside, Lipton – matcha is here to stay. The flavor, which has grown increasingly popular because of its health benefits, is a more caffeinated and bitter version of regular green tea. Though matcha is most often found in water or milk-based teas, it can also be mixed with coffee, and Scribbles Coffee Co. has created a well-balanced concoction of the flavor alongside espresso, ginger and turmeric for a short and sweet boost when you have a late night of studying.

THEBURR.COM | 19

COMMUNITY

THE BEST OPEN MIC NIGHTS IN KENT WORDS BY Collin Cunningham

There’s no easy way to put this: not everyone was born to be a star. Luckily that doesn’t matter because there are plenty of options to try your performative chops at a karaoke or an open mic event in downtown Kent.

MONDAY @ZEPHYR We get it, the first day of classes each week is rough and sometimes you need a bit of extra motivation after a relaxing weekend.

That’s why it’s nice Zephyr Pub on Main Street hosts karaoke every Monday from 10 until close, which is usually around 2 a.m. Stop in for a cheap drink to calm your nerves before stepping up to the mic in one of Kent’s most comfortable bars.

Photo by Tessa Poulain. Kendall MacKeigan and Jacob Mitchell sing their rendition of “Someone Like You” by Adele March 11 at karaoke night at Zephyr Pub.

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

TUESDAY @KENT FRAMES Kent Frames on South Water Street is the place to try your hand or your band at open mic between 7:30 and 10 p.m. You might have to raise your voice to be heard over the sound of bowling balls rolling against the hardwood lanes, but that’s just more encouragement.

Photo by Bobbi Broome. Performers sing and play instruments at Kent Frames Open Mic Night on Tuesday, February 26.

WEDNESDAY @VENICE CAFE Hosted by Bethany Joy of indie-folk band The Speedbumps, Venice Cafe’s open mic nights are a quieter affair, more of a smooth reward to carry you through the rest of the week after hump day than a loud and extravagant showing. Stop by to see some of Northeast Ohio’s most talented up-and-coming songwriters every week. Signups are at 7:30 p.m. and performances continue from 8 until 11 p.m.

Photo by Sarah Riedlinger. Ty Prager performs for his first time at Venice Cafe with his original song “Only Cure for Heartbreak” on Wednesday, March 6.

FRIDAY @EUROGYRO EuroGyro, on the corner of South Depeyster and Main Street, offers karaoke from 9 p.m. through close every Friday night. Hosted by Nick the Drummer since 2013, this event offers hundreds of songs, ranging from oldies to newer pop and rap jams. Come for Power Hour between 8 and 9 p.m., and then stick around to hear an eclectic blend of “Sweet Caroline” and “Shake It Off.” EuroGyro only checks ID when you go to buy a drink, so feel free to go in and pick a song no matter how old you are.

Photo by Sarah Riedlinger. EuroGyro hosts a concert event in place of karaoke night on Friday, March 8 as the onlooking crowd cheers.

THEBURR.COM | 21

COMMUNITY

MEET THE GIRLS WHO CREATED GUYS NIGHT WORDS BY Shelbie Goulding

The two-woman duo Marble takes on sexism in the DJ industry.

C

“

HI CHI” BY TREY SONGZ, featuring Chris Brown, starts to play just before 11 p.m. on Thursday, the time Water Street Tavern starts building a crowd for Guys Night.

As many lip-sync by the bar waiting to be served pitcher cocktails, a brunette and blonde female duo named Marble bounce to the beat. Brookelyn Goupil and Jocealyn Leon, both 22 years old, pitched the iconic Guys Night idea to Water Street Tavern two weeks before winter break 2018, and it’s been a social empire since.

The two DJs didn’t start off as Marble.

“Everyone kept asking us what our name was and we just kept saying Brooke and Jocealyn,” Goupil says, “but it just didn’t sound right.”

They didn’t know until a rapper invited them on tour and asked what their name was. “I went ‘Marble!’” Goupil says. “I’m all about food always and I thought ‘marble cake’ because I’m blonde, she’s brunette.” Both the rapper and Leon ended up liking the name.

PHOTOS BY Sophia DelCiappo

together. They both went to Kent State and Leon says there are not many DJ duos in the transferred to Cleveland State together, where industry, especially female duos. “We’ve defiLeon finished her associate’s degree in market- nitely seen difficulties recently,” Leon says. “We ing. Goupil is currently finishing her degree in like to present ourselves in a professional way, broadcast journalism back at Kent State. They and we want to be given the same opportunities have had almost every job together as well. “My as guys.” Some female DJs mix music in bikinis, first job and her second job was John Rich but that’s not the way Marble wants to be seen.

Jewelers,” Leon says, “and ever since then we “We want to be up there with them but not be kind of went back and forth with each other.” seen as sexual objects,” Leon says. “We just want They both currently work at a club called people to have a good time and enjoy our music.”

Magnolia, while Leon works at Burntwood She says their style is low-key. The two bounce Tavern and Goupil works at First Watch. They off of one another’s energy in order to keep their DJ together as a side job and a fun hobby. style balanced, fun and professional.

Marble started mixing music this past summer.

The pair got hired by XIV Productions in Cleveland, and that’s where the idea to become DJs began. “The guy that owned the studio was originally a DJ and then he stopped to produce his own music,” Goupil says. Leon was intrigued by the idea, especially after attending a big concert. “The DJ was Zedd and we were blown away,” Leon says. “That’s when it really sparked.”

When they first started mixing, their neighbors didn’t care for the noisy hobby. “We were horrible at first,” Goupil says. “Yeah, we weren’t good,” Leon laughs. With time and practice over several months, they eventually found their sound, which Leon describes as music that gives people energy – something they can sing and dance to.

They usually mix current pop and hip-hop songs, along with throwbacks within the same genres.

After finding their sound, they got their first gig.

While they wouldn’t consider the first gig perfect, it was a learning experience. It was at a restaurant named Granite City: a nice, sit-down restaurant. “People were sitting and eating a nice steak and we were like, ‘Wow, this place is Goupil and Leon have been friends since they nice and serious. What are we about to play?’” were born. “Our moms were best friends in high Leon says. “There were tablecloths and candles school so then we were forced to be best friends,” lit. This place was so boujee,” Goupil agrees.

Goupil says. “It worked out ‘cause we’ve been “Like bro, we don’t have Frank Sinatra.” After best friends ever since.” Growing up, the two that, the gigs got better as they continued to play would dance, play sports and do cheerleading at colleges, clubs and restaurants.

The DJ duo Marble mix a playlist at Guys Night.

22 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

Goupil says she sees people mock her on social media as well. “We’re down-to-earth people,” Goupil says. “People get an idea of who we are before they even talk to us.”

Regardless, the duo keeps bouncing to the beat and mixing music, ignoring the sexism and social media trolls. They plan to stay strong and make Thursday nights at Water Street Tavern a good time for college students.

SHELBIE GOULDING | sgouldi1@kent.edu

Start your new chapter

where it all began 855.353.4031 | 330.346.0100 www.kentstatehotel.com www.kentstateweddings.com

CURRENT

WORDS BY Puja Mohan ILLUSTRATION BY Elliot Burr

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

With rising expectations, millenials can’t help but burn out.

T

HIS PAST BREAK, I was reading news articles online When applying our understanding of burnout to the millennial when I stumbled across a Buzzfeed News story titled generation, we know that college students are categorized as “How Millennials Became the Burnout Generation” by millennials. College students are forced to deal with immense Anne Helen Petersen. Usually, I go on Buzzfeed to take quizzes stress and pressures. Adjusting to the independence and freethat tell me when I’ll get married based on my favorite color, dom of college, learning to tackle the rigor of academics while but this article captured my attention. Petersen mentions balancing a job and extracurriculars, navigating social nethow younger generations are often viewed as lazy and privi- working, as well as being forced to make decisions that can leged, yet weak and incapable, which I found quite interesting. determine the course of one’s future are only a few examples This wasn’t the first time that I had heard or read about how of pressures that can lead one to fall victim to burnout. kids nowadays are spoiled and not equipped to survive in the real world.

“My first semester was really rough for me because I’d go a week being productive and being all caught up on my work,” says According to the Association for Psychological Science, burn- Miranda Eplin, a freshman journalism major, “but then out of out is a legitimate medical disorder associated with a loss of nowhere I’d get extremely overwhelmed and shut down comdesire and interest, extreme weariness and negative thought pletely. I’d sleep a lot and constantly worry. But the worrying processes, resulting in mental and physical impairment in didn’t motivate me either.” daily activities. Burnout can also lead to permanent changes in the physical and chemical processes of the brain, leaving Freshmen undergraduates appear more likely to experience sufferers prone to psychological and physical illnesses. Emily burnout.

Ribnik, a professional clinical counselor and supervisor at Kent State Stark, highlights that experiencing physical symp- “It’s very hard to be a freshman because it’s your first year. You toms, such as stomach cramps and body aches, or other emo- probably don’t have built-in friendships and a support system. tional symptoms does not necessarily equate to having a mental You don’t know faculty on campus, and this is a huge life illness or disorder. transition. It’s all this upheaval at once that I think makes it very easy to burn out,” says Shannon Ciesla, an assistant “Burnout builds over time, and sometimes we don’t always professor in the Department of Psychological Sciences at Kent catch it before it kind of kicks in as this really intense expe- State University. rience,” Ribnik says.

Burnout can happen to anyone and everyone. I, at times, have However, these kids, who were supposedly spoiled and privi- fallen into the depths of stress and exhaustion while also not leged, are now grown-ups and truly struggling to survive. This taking care of myself enough physically or mentally. I have lead Petersen to dub millennials as the “burnout generation.” now come to recognize the dangers of doing so. There is, in Although controversial, researchers Neil Howe and William reality, a frightening possibility that such poor lifestyle habits Strauss published an article in The Atlantic identifying indi- could have pushed me to fall victim to the unfortunate label viduals born between 1982 and 2004 to be the millennial of being a member of the burnout generation. In the future, I generation, which includes adults who are likely in college or would hope for both myself and my generation to have more have recently entered the workforce. Why might it be that awareness and understanding in order to both prevent and people who are between the young ages of 15 and 27 are expe- overcome burnout. riencing burnout? Are we really just entitled since birth or are there legitimate concerns that we need to look out for to Prevention and early detection are key to avoiding the serious protect our generation? effects of burnout. Ciesla discusses time management and self-

THEBURR.COM | 25

CURRENT care as crucial components of prevention. When applying this to undergraduates specifically, the cruciality of a routine becomes apparent.

“At the beginning of every semester sitting down and kind of figuring out what your obligations are for courses as well writing out a schedule, but also putting in that schedule time for self-care,” says Ciesla. Self-care can include getting sufficient sleep, eating properly, meditating, exercising, staying hydrated, or simply taking little breaks throughout the day to do what you love.

with programs on campus that target burnout prevention and coping.

I like to take a step back from all stressors and responsibilities.

I choose to do an activity I enjoy, like watching a movie and eating ice cream, and just trying to relax. If this doesn’t help, I try to journal about what is troubling me while listening to music. Once these intense feelings subside, I take a methodical approach to the tasks at hand and begin making a schedule, planning out everything I have to do and when it is due by, and how many hours each day I should allot to such work. I set aside time to eat, shower, relax and maybe, though rarely, exercise.

“There’s a lot of things going on between the ages of 15 and 27, some that are very new but can still be very stressful even though it’s really exciting,” Ribnik says. She includes examples Giving yourself small rewards in between such a schedule, such such as living outside of home, entering a full-time job, devel- as hanging out with friends or watching TV, can serve as motioping serious friendships and relationships, or even learning vation. Another motivating force can be friends and family. I how to drive. “We’re always experiencing new things and that would say many of my friends have also experienced exhaustion, newness always wears off. But during this age it can be really high stress and feelings of anxiousness. During these times, stressful,” Ribnik says. The added experiences of social media, we recognized having that strong support system with each lack of education in regards to essential life skills such as money other and becoming comfortable opening up about our feelings managing, how to live independently, how to make a basic meal, helped us cope. Even simple activities such as journaling, medand others seem to add to the pressures faced academically. itating and exercising has helped many of my peers and I Ribnik also points out that families are facing different yet manage our stress. difficult economic issues than in the past, and with the evolution of America’s global identity post 9/11, millennials and their “Now I have an Emotional Support Animal, and taking care of families are forced to grow up with these added stressors and him makes me realize that I can’t be so in my head, and he pressures that previous generations did not face. repays me with love and a peace of mind,” Eplin says. “This semester I’m still struggling, but not as bad as I did last semes“If you find yourself in the midst of a kind of a state of burnout ter. I continuously grow and it takes time. But I know the that it’s good to recognize that and take stock of what your journey is worth it.” current priorities and your goals are,” Ciesla says. “Consider PUJA MOHAN | pmohan3@kent.edu getting an assessment at that point or talking to someone to see if there’s something else going on too. For example, if you’re suffering from some kind of anxiety disorder, that will really exacerbate a lot of these things that you’re experiencing with burnout.” Other options include talking to friends and family, seeking out counseling or therapy, and getting involved

LEGALIZING TRAUMA WORDS BY Emerald Lloy

Gay American History by Jonathan Katz is a work on gay history that talks about where conversion therapy comes from. The history of the practice in the United States has roots in the beginning of the 20th century and the heyday of Freudian psychology.

26 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

FUSION

SPRING 2019

Conversion therapy is the pseudoscientific attempt at changing someone’s sexual orientation and/or gender identity to heterosexual and cisgender, through a variety of behavioral, cognitive and psychoanalytic techniques.

And it’s still legal in Ohio.

READ MORE

On stands now! ohiofusion.com

Fusion is a student-run magazine focused on LGBTQ issues on campus. For more, visit ohiofusion.com and look for its new issue on stands Spring 2019.

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

OUT OF THE BOX THE BEST MONTHLY SUBSCRIPTION BOXES FOR YOUR MONEY

$35

RESCUE BOX

S

UBSCRIPTION boxes are little chests of gifts you can order to surprise yourself with new clothes, snacks or knick-knacks every month. The issue is many of these subscription boxes promise value but end up being filled with cheap, useless junk. Here we break down these loot-filled crates into five categories so you know what to buy without wasting your cash.

$30

HUNT A KILLER This box differs a bit from the others on the list because instead of getting tangible objects, you’re paying for the experience. Over a six-month period, you’ll receive a package from a serial killer filled with clues such as maps, police records and newspaper clippings to help piece together a serial killer’s identity.

There are subscription boxes that focus specifically on cat or dog owners, but Rescue Box is one of the only subscription boxes that allows you to choose what toys and treats you’ll receive based on your pet preference.

Better yet, proceeds from these boxes are donated to animal shelters to help other animals get vaccinations and food.

$10+

BULU BOX Many health boxes appeal to people who participate in specific activities, but Bulu’s collection of vitamins, snack alternatives and supplements will work for you regardless of your workout routine. Subscribers can also choose between boxes geared toward weight loss and ones that contain vitamins promoting wellness and immunity.

PLATED

$48+

While an avid podcast listener has probably been hearing about Blue Apron, Plated is the better option because it grants the user more flexibility in building meals around dietary restrictions, as well as a slight cost reduction.

Recent menu items include cavatappi alla Norma with roasted eggplant and whipped ricotta, as well as chickpea, sweet potato and brown rice bowls, which include a marinated feta and cilantro sauce.

$15

WORDS BY Collin Cunningham ILLUSTRATIONS BY Sarah Riedlinger

BOOK OF THE MONTH CLUB Functioning like a traditional monthly book club, this box allows readers to choose from a selection of five books every four weeks, many of which are new or early releases. Even if you’re busy, the time frame gives plenty of room to finish your current read before the next one arrives.

THEBURR.COM | 27

CURRENT

HOMME Q&A WORDS BY Tessa Poulain ILLUSTRATIONS BY Sarah Riedlinger

A Q&A with Matt Welsh, President of Homme Men’s Fashion Organization.

A

NEW SEMESTER always welcomes new activities, clubs and organizations around campus. Many are seen at BlastOff each year, but there are always some organizations formed after August that many students aren’t aware of. One of these organizations is Homme: the first and only organization dedicated to men’s fashion on Kent State’s campus. Many conversations in the fashion world revolve around a woman’s figure, but the board members running Homme sensed the lack of conversation about men’s fashion and thus, Homme was born. I conversed with president Matt Welsh over email to learn more.

zation coordinator responsible for reporting important emails and information to the executive board. Aaron Touris is our graphic designer and helps with the creative side of the organization. Alex Towcimak is a creative consultant for Homme. Scott Earley is the treasurer responsible for all financial needs. Natalie Krutsch is the organization secretary. We are all sophomore fashion students, except Tyler whose a sophomore architecture student. And Tammy Cullen is our wonderful academic advisor.

Q: About how many people are a part of Homme?

A: Homme Men’s Fashion Organization is the first and only student organization on campus that strives to share interest in menswear and men’s fashion. We named the organization “Homme” for two reasons: it’s a French word meaning “man,” and it has a powerful and professional sound when it’s pronounced.

A: Since we launched our organization last September, we have 25 paid members and over a hundred people on our email list.

Q: What is Homme? Why did you decide on the name, “Homme?”

Q: How many board members? Who are they?

A: We have six board members running the organization. I’m the organization’s founder and current president. Tyler Turskey is the organi-

28 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

utive board is sophomore fashion design / merchandising students (plus one architect), we felt a lack of presence within the menswear community on campus, in the classroom and out. A lot of the fashion design courses here are crafted towards learning about the female figure and women’s wear. There needed to be a course or organization that could shed some light on the male aspect of the fashion industry to even the playing field. Now, with this organization being a real deal, it gives students who are interested in men’s fashion an outlet to communicate, learn, and meet new people. Hopefully in the future, this organization can give high school graduates another reason to apply to the Fashion School at Kent State.

Q: What is your main goal with this organization?

A: Our main goal is to provide a space for community, learning and networking opportunities for the fashion enthusiast.

Q: Why was it started?

A: We started the organization for mainly one reason. It had to be done. As most of our exec-

Q: Do any of you design any men’s fashion or do you just meet and talk about art and fashion?

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

A: The entire executive board of Homme designs clothing and art. We love creating things and sharing our work with others.

Q: Would you consider a Homme meeting to be a safe space for a minority e.g. LGBTQA+, African Americans, etc.? Are there members in the group that belong to these minorities?

A: Homme does not discriminate toward anybody who attends or shows interest in our events.

We have a lot of people that show up to our events who are of different genders, ethnicities and school majors.

Q: Is there anything you would like people to know about Homme?

A: We’d like to let people know that since we are a new organization on campus, we’re always open to take advice and ideas for future events and ways to improve the organization.

Q: Could you be a part of this group even if you weren’t super into fashion but wanted to know more about it and make friends/ connections?

A: We encourage anybody and everybody to attend our events. Everybody who attends brings their buddies and we all have a good time.

Q: What kind of events do you host on campus e.g. trivia nights, any fashion shows, art shows, etc.?

A: Since September, we have hosted six events.

We have hosted a vintage clothing seminar, menswear clothing swap, Alexander McQueen documentary screening, two fashion trivia contests, and most recently, a documentary screening of the Italian fashion house, Off-White c/o Virgil Abloh. Within the rest of the Spring 2019 semester, we have plans to host a sewing production seminar and a shoe building workshop.

Q: How often do you meet? When and where?

A: We try and host meetings once or twice a month. We are a brand new organization so we are still in the learning process of hosting events on campus. So although we may not have weekly meetings, the events we do host are well worth the wait.

Q: Do you need to fill out any sort of application or subscribe to an email list to attend these meetings? How can people get informed when the next meeting will occur?

A: Most of our events we host are “All Access” meaning that anybody and everybody can attend.

We sometimes host meetings that are for paid members onl,y giving the organization somewhat of an exclusive side to it. For the most part, we encourage all men and women who are interested in fashion to attend our events and check it out!

We have an Instagram where we post weekly about what’s going on with Homme which can be found @HommeKent. We also have an email where we send out weekly reminders of what is going on.

TESSA POULAIN | tpoulain@kent.edu

CURRENT

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN HITS HOME WORDS BY Amanda Levine

PHOTOS BY Bobbi Broome

ILLUSTRATION BY Elliot Burr

Two Kent State students share their experiences after being affected by the partial government shutdown.

J

ENNA PLETCHER WAS EXCITED to begin her Spring 2019 semester in Washington D.C. There, she would take classes twice a week in addition to an internship with the Department of Justice three times a week. But with the government shutdown, Pletcher wasn’t able to begin her semester the way she wanted to.

In the midst of the shutdown, both Engle and Pletcher had to find new internships and other ways to fill the time. Pletcher received an offer from Capitol Hill Consulting Group, while Engle searched for another internship as well, eventually landing a position at a Rep. Ted Yoho’s office. But then, about a week after receiving their new internships, the shutdown ended.

Pletcher, a senior with a double major in English and history, “My program coordinator was really trying to keep me high filed her background check, which takes six to eight weeks to spirited because I can’t tell you how many times I came home process. Since the form was non-essential, Pletcher says her and would just cry because I was so uncertain about everything application was delayed. and didn’t know if I was gonna have a job or internship or if they were going to send me home because I didn’t have an “Emotionally, it was very strange because I’ve never lived in a city internship,” Engle says. before,” Pletcher says. “D.C. is amazing, but the rest of the program for three days a week everybody was at work, a whole eight AJ Leu, the College of Communication & Information diversity hour day and so I’m home alone, I don’t have anything to do.” director, met with students who were impacted by the shutdown.

Leu helps students get the necessary resources they need to Hannah Engle, a senior with a double major in political science succeed, whether that be scholarships or textbooks. and international relations, was in the same situation as Pletcher. Engle started her application process in March 2018 “Our approach to diversity is very holistic, very inclusive. Really, and began filling out the application for an internship in August. it’s to remove any sort of barriers that are preventing students When the government shut down, her application was still from being successful,” Leu says. being processed, thus delaying the start of her internship.

Leu says that a large number of military students were impacted.

“Here I am with 23 other students who are so excited to work in D.C. and have the D.C. experience and I’m watching all of “I also saw a lot of military people unfortunately, which is so them do what they came here to do and I’m just sitting in my messed up,” Leu says. “You know, the people who’ve dedicated apartment not able to do anything,” Engle says. “With the gov- their lives are not even getting the money that they’re supernment shut down, the museums weren’t open, all of the memo- posed to get.” rials were covered in trash because they can’t pick up the trash and it was a really bad experience for the first four weeks.”

Some military members were receiving paychecks based off of their branch and position, but students who were covered by With the semester in full force and no clear end to the shutdown, the Government Issue (GI) Bill were struggling. Additionally, they watched their friends go off to their internships everyday. students who had to go to drill during that time also weren’t With museums closed, Engle and Pletcher weren’t able to being compensated. explore the city how they wanted to either.

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CURRENT “I mean, if they’re not getting their GI Bill, they’re not going to drill, they’re not getting paid for working, they have no income whatsoever,” Leu says.

“Politicians, especially conservative politicians, are very critical of government, and I think it does a disservice because we need people who inspect our food, help clean our air,” Cassell says.

“Or we need people who man the IRS and staff the IRS and For those who were worried about tuition payments, the uni- make sure our parks work.” versity sent a document to One Stop Student Services addressing issues to help with payment, but there was no email sent On Jan. 25, President Trump agreed to end the shutdown for to students. three weeks to reach a funding deal. It was unclear what a temporary opening of the government would look like. Funding In an email sent to the colleges, for currently registered Spring for programs resumed and Trump signed a bill that compen2019 students: “Provide them with an extended payment period sated government workers for their missed pay. Cassell says for their spring balance. Their due date will be extended to at the government shutdown is less of President Trump’s problem least 60 days after the conclusion of the government shutdown. and more of the Republican Party’s.

Ensure they are not subject to late fees, registration and/or transcript holds during the spring term.”

“Even though Trump is sort of the figurehead, ultimately it’s the Republican Party that’s driving us,” Cassel says. “I think for Mark Cassell, a professor in the Department of Political Science, the Democrats, ceding ground on it would be problematic for focuses on public policy. Cassell says if parents aren’t being them because if it was effective this time, one could see it being compensated at their jobs, it could affect students’ ability to an effective tool the next time the Republican party or the go to school.

Democratic party for that matter wants to pursue a policy that the opposition is opposed to. It’s a very dangerous approach.”

“It’s not clear how it’ll play out, but I think the shutdown sort of illustrates the damage that a shutdown can incur. I think Despite the pushback from Democrats, Republicans and we all got to see it firsthand and it wasn’t pleasant,” Cassell President Trump worked on a spending bill for the border wall. says. “No one really wins.”

In order to avoid another shutdown, Democrats proposed a bill at about $1.3 billion for the border wall, according to CNN. Cassell says the United States is one of the few countries where President Trump then declared a national emergency after we see the government partially shut down. signing a bill for his border wall.

“It’s sort of unique,” Cassell says. “For example, during the Clinton years, it’s typically a tension between branches of government and it’s a way in which one branch can try to exercise leverage of another branch.”

After the shutdown ended and Pletcher’s background check went through, she and Engle were able to begin their internships. But because they were beginning in week five, they had already missed out on a third of their program.

President Trump’s government shutdown lasted a “I really hope that the president and the government take into record-breaking 35 days. Starting on Dec. 22, 2018, Trump consideration that when they do shut down the government, shut down the government because he wanted more than $5 they’re not just affecting one person’s life, they’re affecting billion for a border wall. Democrats and Republicans weren’t hundreds of thousands of people’s lives,” Engle says. “I think able to reach a compromise on funding to keep the govern- sometimes we forget to see the big picture whether you’re the ment open. This was the third government shutdown during president of the United States or you’re just a common worker.”

Trump’s presidency.

AMANDA LEVINE | alevine3@kent.edu Federal workers weren’t receiving paychecks and people who relied on federal money for rent were worried about eviction, according to an article from Reuters. Prior to the ending of the three-week-long shutdown, there were chances of programs such as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) losing funding, according to CBS News. According to the Congressional Budget Office estimates, the partial shutdown delayed $18 billion in federal spending and suspended some federal services, thus lowering the projected level of real GDP in the first quarter of 2019 by $8 billion (in 2019 dollars), or 0.2 percent.”

With federal workers going to work unpaid, employees weren’t able to give back to the economy in ways such as paying taxes and buying groceries. The effects of the government shutdown expanded to federal programs being temporarily shut down as well. The Food and Drug Administration had stopped food inspections, but resumed in mid January according to an article from CNN. A Kent State student struggles with finances amidst the government shutdown.

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FEATURES

THE DOME

WORDS BY Megan Ayscue PHOTOS BY Sophia DelCiappo & Megan Ayscue

A look at Kent’s only friendly neighborhood strip club.

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

J

UST PAST MIKE’S PLACE, behind Marc’s and across from Indian Valley apartments sits a geodesic dome, lonely and out of place, surrounded by average office buildings.

A glow of blue neon lights hangs above the entrance. To one side of the building, two signs read “The Dome” and “Desiree’s,” and on the other side a sign announces “Dancers Wanted.”

The gravel and dirt parking lot to this unusual building is regularly empty, albeit a limo with a broken window. After walking under the arched canopy of the entrance and opening the wooden door with a large metal handle – around the size of a candlestick and similarly shaped – guests are greeted by an entryway. Stairs just outside of the entrance lead up to the bar and down to the basement. A sign on the left wall for this “neighborhood bar with a view” lists rules such as “No Flying Colors,” “No Plain White Tank Tops” and “No Recording of Entertainers.”

On the upper floor, the building’s small size, less than 2,000 feet total, becomes more apparent. With a max capacity around 80, the small floor space is speckled with two-seater tables. A jukebox and dartboard line the wall with a bar adjacent to the top of the stairs. In the center of it all is a tall, shiny metal pole on an unsteady platform, able to been seen from every side of the room.

At the bar, I order a rum and coke. “Any kind” of rum is fine, I tell the bartender. There are only a few people in tonight, chatting at the bar with each other and the barman. I’m watching “fails” on one TV as the bartender takes my drink behind a door to pour in the soda from a 2-liter. The bar hasn’t gotten a soda gun yet. The high dome ceiling echoes pop music while neon-colored lights bathe the insides with greens and blues.

“This place was built roughly in the late ‘60s, early ‘70s, back when the geodesic domes were a big thing,” says Joshua Lute, general manager of The Dome. “It’s an interesting building. I love the design of the place, I fell in love with it as soon as [the

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I love the design of

owner] asked me to come out here. It was probably one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen.”

the place, I fell in love

It’s the interesting shape of the building that usually brings people in and the continued intrigue of the inside that encourages patrons to have a drink. It’s the pleasant company of the staff, along with different kinds of entertainment, Lute says, that make people want to stay.

with it as soon as [the owner] asked me to come out here. It was

While the pool table sometimes sticks before you can get the pool balls out and the ceiling can occasionally leak, I seem to be drawn back to visiting The Dome most nights I venture out.

Some days it’s busier than others, but I’ve never had a dull conversation; it’s a completely unique experience every time I visit.

probably one of the

This old but distinctive building is currently owned by Mario Peter Colosimo and has been for decades.

coolest things I've ever seen.

- Joshua Lute

“He’s a little old Italian man, the sweetest guy,” Lute says. “His name is Mario … but he goes by Pete or Peter.”

This isn’t the only business Colosimo owns. In total, he owns three: two gentlemen’s clubs, the other being in Norton, and one music bar in Cuyahoga Falls that used to also be a gentlemen’s club.

Changing the type of venue isn’t a new idea to The Dome. In the past, The Dome has been both a restaurant and a wine bar,

Photo by Sophia DelCiappo. No longer turned on, The Dome’s old neon sign still sits above the doorway.

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

occasionally also hosting bands and comedians from time to time. However, it’s been a strip club off and on since the ‘90s, something it always comes back to.

mind, not triangles and pentagons. And with so many hinges in the building, if every surface is not perfect, leaking after rain and wind is bound to happen.

“It’s changed from a regular bar to a strip club multiple times,” Despite the reason The Dome was created, it is still surviving Stella says, who is using her “sex work name.” Stella was a today as a gentlemen’s club, the only one in Kent. Lute sees dancer for The Dome at the beginning of 2018. “I know that promise in the business as well. when I was working there, people would come in and be surprised it was a strip club or people would call and be like, ‘is “[Gentlemen’s clubs are] more accepted now than what they this a strip club now?’ People just never knew because it used to be,” he says. “Now, as silly as it sounds, it’s kind of like changed so often.” a date night location for a lot of couples just because it’s more socially accepted.”

While the type of business has shifted over the years, the original purpose and full history of The Dome is less clear.

It isn’t just the gentlemen’s club Lute is interested in, though he has been in the business for over 15 years. His biggest concern “You’ve got everybody and their mother coming in here and is making sure people are having fun. The sign above the exit telling us what it used to be, and half of them are so ridiculous reflects the sentiment: “Enter As Strangers – Leave As Friends.” there’s just no way,” Lute says. “One guy came in and, because it’s a round building, told us it’s an observatory.”

“We’re open to entertainment,” Lute says. “That doesn’t matter if it’s bands, doesn’t matter if it’s girls, doesn’t matter whether In the late 1960s and early 1970s, a craze of geodesic domes as it’s a drag show. If somebody wanted to come in here and put houses hit suburbia. They started as a solution to the postwar on a ping-pong exhibition, I would be okay with that. I want housing crisis and helped save on energy by distributing heating people to come in and enjoy themselves.” and cooling more effectively than rectangular houses. However, these houses were not without problems.

The Dome plans on doing drag shows to keep things different and entertaining. It held its first show on Feb. 22 and intends The biggest issue for domes, and one The Dome itself faces, is to have one show a month from now on. leaking. Building materials were created with rectangles in

Photo by Sophia DelCiappo. Lighting on the side of The Dome shows the captivating architecture of the building during nighttime.

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Photo by Megan Ayscue. Drag Queens from Sins of Sultry pose with a patron after their show.

The small, circular floor was packed with patrons the night of the first show. As the queens performed, $1 bills and $5 bills were handed and tossed, some balled up and thrown down from the mezzanine. Several performers took advantage of the building itself, walking around the small ledge lining the walls – heels barely staying on – or jumping from the elevated pole’s platform into the splits.

The night was filled with sassy comebacks and saucy outfits.

Cheers during each performance were heard in the parking lot before even opening the door, and the well-deserved screams did not stop throughout the performances.

A personal favorite moment: One queen went completely upside down at the very top of the pole during a routine. My mouth fell open.

“I just want to see people happy and entertained,” Lute says. “I don’t want to be what everything downtown is.”

Along with all of these ventures, dancers themselves are still a part of The Dome’s business. In the 1980s, Lute says, dancers would be paid hourly. Then in the ’90s, a switch was made to dancers being independent contractors. Recently, there has been a slow shift back to dancers being paid by the establishments they work at.

“Here, we pay our girls. We give them a tipped wage. In the state of Ohio, the minimum is $4.15 an hour. I give them $4.25 an hour,” Lute says. “They get their hourly, and then they also get their tips too, so they’re able to make money.”

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On slow days, Lute says he wants girls to still be paid, and he wants there to be girls when The Dome opens. Stella worked at The Dome before the change to hourly pay was made.

“I had fun. I enjoyed the freedom there, I enjoyed that they let me do my thing, let me do what I wanted, it was a good experience, it was a valuable experience. I think it really prepared me to work in other environments,” Stella says.

But Lute cares about the dancers as more than just employees.

He wants to make sure they’re looked after.

“Sometimes in this industry, you don’t get just the college girls.

You get single mothers, you get girls who are having a hard time keeping food on their plate, this is my way of saying ‘let me help,’” Lute says. “I can’t pay their rent, I can’t pay their bills or anything like that, so at least the little bit we can do, we can try. So girls come in, they want something to eat because they’re hungry? Yeah, absolutely, whatever you want you pick it out and we’ll fix it for you. And that’s our way of trying to look out for our girls.”

At the end of the day, however, Lute wants anyone who visits The Dome to have a good time. Even if patrons just want to talk with the bartenders, play pool or watch Fail Nation or the Chive on the TVs, Lute is happy they’re coming to The Dome.

MEGAN AYSCUE | mayscue@kent.edu

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

ANXIETY BIRTH CONTROL

IN THE AGE OF

WORDS BY Cameron Gorman ILLUSTRATIONS BY Mark Tabar PHOTO BY Tessa Poulain

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What was at the root of my contraception spiral?

I

F YOU FEEL my arm in a certain place – press down on the spot of soft skin inside of my elbow – you’ll feel a sudden hardness in the flesh. It’s a little plastic rod the size of a matchstick called Nexplanon. For the next two and a half years – until August 14, 2021, according to the flexible plastic card I carry in my wallet – it will release progesterone into my bloodstream.

Sexual Assault, says she didn’t learn about any birth control options – save condoms – in school.

“I knew some friends who were taking the pill, but I was never really interested in it because I knew that they had a lot of side effects, and we learned about different methods of birth control in Sex Ed in eighth grade, but … it was not helpful whatsoever because, obviously, Ohio’s education doesn’t have I like my Nexplanon – though it was very painful to insert, to talk about other options, so I never really knew what was though sometimes when I bathe, it itches like fire. I like it out there,” Wink says. because the Nexplanon contraceptive implant, according to its website, is supposed to be almost as effective as sterilization Neither did I. Looking back, I wonder if I should have given in preventing pregnancy. It isn’t fallible by human error. It just my decision to go on hormonal birth control more time, done sits there, held in place by my skin, waiting. more research or asked for more advice.

I don’t remember the first time I learned about birth control, Kim Myford, who has a Master of Science in Nursing and is a but I do know that, until college, I didn’t have a clue about it. Certified Nurse Practitioner with Women’s Health Services at At my boyfriend’s urging, 19-year-old me walked through the Kent State, says “anything” involved with hormones can have doors of the Women’s Clinic at DeWeese Health Center. I was an effect on one’s anxiety or mood – and when I went on the pill, scared, and I had never done this before. I told my doctor so. I had already been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

Though my memory has eroded the exact details of my time in the office, I remember feeling a pressing in my chest. It must “If someone has severe anxiety or depression, caution should have been excitement over this, the idea that I would be able be used in choosing contraception and with the start of conto take control over something that had been worrying me. I traception when anxiety or depression symptoms can worsen,” would finally be protected, and once I was protected, I would Myford wrote in an email. be safe. I knew things were better now than they had been.

Who would I have asked? I don’t think I told my mother that “The birth control pill was kind of rushed to market, and that I started the pill – when I told her I had the implant, a year the early women who were taking it ended up, to some degree later, she told me not to tell my grandmother. being, in the worst-case scenario, guinea pigs … they were testing out the glitches, and they were finding what might go “If young people don’t have family members that are talking to wrong with the product,” Suzanne L. Holt, the director of them about it, and then they also don’t have comprehensive Women’s Studies and a professor at Kent State, says. sex education, which many school districts throughout the state of Ohio don’t, they have abstinence-only education, then But this was not the age of the Dalkon Shield. What kind of they just might not have a source for information about birth birth control was I looking for? I did not know. Maybe, I said, control,” says Leah Pusateri, a community education manager the pill. After all, the pill was the only kind of birth control I with Planned Parenthood of Greater Ohio. knew anything about. I could handle it, the pill and its diminutive name. It wasn’t long until I had taken the prescription to Pusateri says that Planned Parenthood attempts to fill the gaps CVS, read the little packet that came with the blue envelope – to provide education about birth control options and other safe carefully, and unfolded its cardboard wings to reveal perfect sex topics. But Wink didn’t have a Planned Parenthood where lines of pink and white. she lived. Instead, she began doing her own research. She decided that an IUD – intrauterine device – would be the best option.

This is similar to the experience freshman exploratory major Olivia Wink had as she began looking for a method of birth “I felt like not having to remember to take a pill … I knew that control. Wink, who’s also the president of Students Against I would just like always forget to take it, and I didn’t want to

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

have to worry about it so much,” Wink says. “I chose the IUD so it would cause me less anxiety about having to remember to take it all the time.”

“I felt like overall it was pretty helpful, and it didn’t seem like misinformation, but of course I can’t really know that for sure,” Wink says.

When I took my first birth control pill, I took it at 10 at night. Those on the boards she frequented, she says, had varying I still remember the time – not too early, not too late. I couldn’t experiences – some would recommend birth control methods forget, or I would be off. My stomach could not settle with the while others described “terrible” experiences with their chosen pill. Every night, I set alarms – blaring through dinner, through devices and medications. quiet nights on the sunporch. I don’t think that I went to a nighttime movie in a year – how could I? When I went out, “The United States has a kind of backwardness about birth there was that silent deadline. control that’s very much a study in contrasts with, say, Canada or Europe,” Holt says. “... And whenever you have a kind of “When we talk about the methods, we sort of let them know some cultural response or political response where you’re dragging of the most important things they need to know about them. So, your feet or you’re looking for excuses, you tend to kind of genfor example, with the pill … that it needs to be taken preferably erate misgivings and fear in an audience.” at the same time every day, without days being missed,” Pusateri says, “and young people seem to express some concern about But if I had no one to ask, I thought, why not Reddit? After that, about being able to keep up with that schedule.” all, like me, Wink admits she wishes she’d known more about birth control.

I wondered, as the summertime began to wake and school no longer lingered on my mind, if I should learn more about the “It was just kind of frustrating that I didn’t really have a basic pill. Perhaps I was looking to give myself permission to have knowledge of anything, and having to Google really simple more freedom, to take the pill a few minutes later on some questions about stuff,” Wink says, “and it just felt like kind of days. Anything to relieve myself of what had started to feel – not like humiliating, but kind of embarrassing that I didn’t more and more like a weight around my hands. And yet – what know already ‘cause it feels like you’re supposed to know all I found was not peace. this stuff before you’re, like, ready to make that decision.”

I lingered in digital spaces like r/birthcontrol, my fear blooming. Gradually, I began to see patterns in the posts. Women would come to the chat rooms posting frantically about taking the wrong pills on the wrong day, taking antibiotics, drinking tea with St. John’s Wort. I looked at my own tea cabinet with a pit in my stomach.

When Wink did online research, she says she found it helpful – some of the time.

If you have no one to ask, why not the internet? Why not consult with a web page that could pass for answers? Visit the subreddit today, click on the organizing tag “Mistake or Risk?” and prepare for the flood. Even visiting the forum now puts an anxious knot in my throat. Many things about it scare me – the tight tenseness of the fear here, the many different answers to the same questions – some of them things I asked.

I remember, at some point while I was on birth control, I started to feel sick – physically, on top of the sickness in my stomach

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19 that had come with constant Googling, tracking my time exactly, calling Planned Parenthood in the hallways of my internship, in a hushed voice, to ask if I should worry about throwing up hours after I had taken my pill. Sleepless nights turned into doctor’s visits turned into blood tests. I had strep and I had mono and I needed antibiotics.

gauge in the dining room, where I kept my pills in a drawer under a clock though the air conditioner was often off. (I thought it was the coolest, driest place in the house.) I thought about buying a temperature ray gun from Walmart to make sure the proteins in the pills weren’t cooking like someone on the subreddit warned they could.

In the Minute Clinic, receiving that news, I shuddered. One thing raced through my mind – interaction. I was right to be worried.

One night, I could not sleep. I sat up in bed, my back aching. I rubbed my hands through my hair and I scratched at my skin and I sweated cold. My mind turned one thought over and over again, something I am afraid even now to type onto the page.

“There are medications, prescription and OTC, in different categories that can affect birth control effectiveness. This is evaluated when medication is prescribed to patients,” Myford writes.

What if? What if something had failed after all? What if I had done something wrong? What if it was already too late?

But asking your pharmacist if the antibiotics would reduce the pill’s effectiveness, like I did, will get you one response: yes.

The Planned Parenthood website gives you another: “Only one antibiotic is known to make the pill less effective. That is rifampin, a special medication used to treat tuberculosis.”

I called my grandmother in the dead of night, and I told her, sobbing, that I needed her to take me to buy a pregnancy test.

Don’t tell my mom, I begged her. I knew she would not. I told her I could not go to sleep, that I would wait until seven or eight, that I would go with her and she could get it for me.

Sierra Clark, the graduate assistant at the Kent State Women’s Center, uses the pill for medical reasons – it helps to control her polycystic ovary syndrome. She needs the pill to manage her symptoms, and still, she is often unsure.

“I am a public health student, and I want to be a doctor and I do a lot of cancer research, so I feel like I’m fairly educated on reproductive health,” Clark says, “but I still have questions … although I consider myself pretty educated, I still have anxiety sometimes.”

Sitting slumped and exhausted in the heat of my sunroom, close to too tired to drink orange juice, I might have broken in some way. I was taking antibiotics I was told would make birth control less effective and would weaken the very thing that was supposed to bring me peace.

I wanted this thing to work. I needed this thing to work. I followed the instructions exactly – I took the medication to the minute. I tracked the clock with my eyes when I swallowed, checked the package for dust to make sure I hadn’t missed even a fragment of a pill. And now, I languished, sick. Compromised.

I could not be perfect.

“It’s always been true with birth control, no matter what the method is, that there’s a pretty severe set of instructions that if you don’t do it right, it might not be effective,” Holt says.

Holt recalls that “early numbers” reported an efficacy close to 100 percent – with perfect use.

“But if you kind of just loosely follow the instructions, I think it was anywhere from like nine or 10 out of 100, so 10 percent of women could get pregnant. So how bad would that feel, to actually be on birth control, but maybe not take the pill the same time every day and all of a sudden you find yourself – you thought you were protected and you weren’t.”

I wondered, sometimes, if it would be worse to know all of this or to be ignorant. I had friends who took the pill at different times, who forgot to take it at all. They shrugged off my worries.

I controlled what I could. I secretly adjusted the temperature

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FEATURES I begged her – and when she said yes, I waited up until she arrived, sat shaking in the car while she went into a CVS. I cannot remember much of that night, only a year or two ago, except for when I took the test, while she waited in the kitchen.

disinfectant there. When I looked at the chairs in the waiting area, I saw the past of myself. I looked at a scared 20-year-old, unsure about her own body, about what this thing might do to that body. Afraid of failing not just herself, but everyone around her.

It was negative. Of course, I thought. Of course, but I don’t know, but of course. I was exhausted. I ate toast in her kitchen, “If it’s possible to blame the woman, we blame the woman,” Holt and I felt like something had to change. says. “I think it would be almost impossible to be a young woman in our culture and not know that. So, we all pick that I decided I had to get something more permanent. Something up pretty early on, as women, to know that if something goes I could not damage or do wrong. wrong, it’s going to be on us … whether or not you ever form that sentence, you know.” Did I know? I think of myself then, (Now that I have it, I still worry, still read the ingredients of outside the waiting room. On a dark wood table, near a window, everything I drink.) I settled, finally, on the implant. And, as was a book of picturesque scenes and artwork, open to a page I thought about getting it, just for a moment, I am sure I of mountain goats. The long hallway stretched out in front of wondered why. me. I took a breath, and I went in.

I wonder if Wink sensed this, too – the underlayer, the thing that made us both seek out procedures which had been painful on our bodies (“I’d say that was one of the most painful I’ve had in my life,” Wink says) for peace of mind.

“My parents had told me that if I had gotten pregnant and had a child that I wouldn’t be able to go to college, or that I would have to support myself fully, like pay for everything,” Wink says.

Was this something I’d thought about, too, in the back of my mind, while waiting for my appointment at Planned Parenthood? I’d gone back for this story – it had smelled like

Online forums like r/birthcontrol provide a space for women to share anxieties and information amongst themselves.

44 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

In two years, the plastic under my skin will run out of its hormones. They will need to inject my arm with burning numbing agent, re-open it to extract the spent white rod, like a perfect bone. They will need to replace it, and I will let them. No matter how much it hurts.

CAMERON GORMAN | cgorman2@kent.edu

I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

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Kent State’s bills don’t do a good job of explaining what students are paying for, incurring hundreds of dollars per semester in hidden athletic fees that don’t benefit the average pupil’s academic career.

F

INDING YOUR STUDENT BILL on Kent State’s web portal is easy. You simply log into Flashline and navigate to the Student and Finances tabs before clicking on Tuition and Payments, which brings you to a page containing your bills for semesters you’ve attended. What’s unfortunately not as easy is figuring out exactly what you’re paying for.

Some of the fees listed on the bill’s line item detail are self-explanatory. For example, the Legal Services Fee funds Student Legal Services and the Program Fee accounts for your major studies. On the other hand, the second highest amount on the bill, the General Fee, comes out to several hundred dollars per semester and is a bit of a mystery. The General Fee actually helps fund 16 other areas, but for some reason the bill doesn’t tell students what these are.

“That General Fee, that’s not very transparent to me,” says Thomas Watral, president of Undergraduate Student Government (USG) at Kent State. Watral believes universities should work toward explaining how much students are paying for each expense on their bill as well as giving the rationale for why these fees are necessary.

Instead, a student has to navigate to the Bursar’s Office section on Kent State’s website to find an explanation of the general fee. Again, that’s basic enough, requiring only three clicks from the University’s homepage to reach the breakdown, but why isn’t there a direct link to it on the bill?

Some Kent State faculty believe visibility is vital when it comes to how much students pay and where it goes.

“Not only is it important to clearly list the charges on the student account, but it is also important to make sure that students and their families have easy access to tuition/fee information so they are able to estimate their educational costs in advance of a term,” says Stina Olafsdottir, the associate vice president for Business and Administration Services at Kent State’s Bursar’s Office.

It’s difficult to claim transparency when the costs are broken down as percentages of the total bill and not by how much you pay for each credit hour. How many bills have you seen that tell you how much you’re paying in terms of a percentage rather than the actual dollar amount?

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“Transparency in whatever we do is important,” says Casey Cegles, the deputy athletics director for Kent State Athletics.

“Whether it’s what you’re paying to go to school, or whether you’re paying a bill at a restaurant, I think transparency is important in all aspects.”

If you go to Dairy Queen, you receive a receipt telling you exactly how much you paid for your medium cookie dough Blizzard. Why is a fast food restaurant more clear about how much you pay for a menu item than a public university is in what they require of students to attend classes?

It’s not just students who are affected by a lack of transparency either.

“A lot of our funding comes from state and federal taxpayers, so it’s not just those citizens attending the University who are paying for it, it’s the entire community,” Watral says.

Most of these General Fee expenses are necessary to pursue an education at Kent: access to the health center, transportation services, facilities management. But there’s one figure that stands out among the rest, due to the fact that it is higher in price and is often unnecessary for the average student’s academic career.

Intercollegiate Athletics comprises a third of what students pay for their general fee. This is roughly $25 spent on intercollegiate athletics per credit hour a student is taking. That’s $300 per semester for a student currently taking 12 credit hours.

This is public knowledge, and it’s up to prospective students when they’re choosing where to go after high school in what they want to pay. Students can take action to make things better for themselves and their peers.

“That’s something for students to understand when they’re looking at different colleges, what is included in their fees,” says Randi Clites, a member of the Ohio House of Representatives who serves District 75, which includes Kent and Ravenna.

“Getting involved in your undergrad student government could help you understand more about how to make an impact like that and engage and make sure that issues like that are transparent to students.”

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This discourse gets muddier when you consider that the NCAA introduced a rule in 2017 allowing scholarships to fund student athletes’ entire college attendance.

Kent State’s website says there are currently more than 38,000 students enrolled in classes across its eight campuses. That’s an estimated $11.4 million going to the athletic department every semester, some to potentially pay for student athletes’ degrees. Why can’t Kent State’s athletic program support itself?

Other schools with larger student bodies don’t struggle with it.

“Ohio State does not use its general fee to support the Department of Athletics,” says Rob Messinger, the director of

GENERAL FEE BREAKDOWN

BY THE DOLLAR

communications for Ohio State University’s Office of Business and Finance. “Our Athletics Department is self-supporting and actually generates revenue for the university’s academic mission, contributing more than $30 million annually to the broader university.”

Ohio State University, a member of the Big 10 Conference, manages to do this by charging for admission to many of its sporting events, like hockey and basketball games, whereas all of Kent’s sporting events are free for students to enter.

“Knowing what you’re paying for, I imagine you should know that,” Cegles says.

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The solution to finding out how to get the burden of different fees off the students’ back is to find more capital, more fundraising outside of the students’ pocketbooks.

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Students shouldn’t have to jump through hoops to see obscured fees. Many faculty members don’t find this to be a big deal, but also don’t see how student bills are written. It does make sense why some may not realize this, but can be seen as dismaying from a student’s perspective, especially when it helps support their salaries.

“The University really needs to work on finding a solution on how to pull away from using student funding or at least making it an opt-in type of system where you can opt-in to pay for athletic contributions,” Watral says. “The solution to finding out how to get the burden of different fees off the students’ back is to find more capital, more fundraising outside of the students’ pocketbooks.”

One possible solution is to give students the option to pay for athletics if it directly benefits them or they want to attend games. This would be similar to the Student Legal Services fee, which students can choose to take off their bill in exchange for losing access to Kent’s lawyers.

The largest fee on a student’s bill is the Instructional Fee, which can cost several hundred or several thousand dollars, depending on which classes a student is taking.

According to Olafsdottir, “The Instructional Fee is used to support faculty teaching costs and other expenses an academic department incurs. The Instructional Fee is also used for other operating expenses, such as student service areas, administrative operations, academic administration, technology infrastructure, services and support and upkeep of the University.”

A Business Insider report from 2015 states there are more than 24 schools who rake in at least $100 million per year through their athletic departments. Kent State can take a look at how these schools can find other areas of funding to support its athletic programs, either by taking ideas from another school’s model or going back to the drawing board entirely. As it stands, though, it seems like the opaqueness of the University’s student bills is trying to mask how much we pay to fund athletics staff, events and scholarships.

Today’s college students are living in an era of record high debt, but we’re the ones who have to effect change in the system by taking action and proposing solutions.

“Students need to make sure that once they start getting involved and passionate about something, that they find a way to make sure their voices are heard,” Clites says. “Just bringing awareness to it and giving a voice to it is really important.”

Students can get in contact with their undergraduate student government about this issue if they would rather have their money spent in areas other than athletics. They can either email Watral at twatral@kent.edu or stop into the USG office on the first floor of the Student Center on campus to express how they feel.

COLLIN CUNNINGHAM | ccunni19@kent.edu

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FLORENCE, ITALY

CHENGDU, CHINA

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HALF A WORLD AWAY Two of The Burr’s staffers share how study abroad programs through Kent State have helped shape their worldviews.

WORDS & PHOTOS BY Sophia Adornetto & Sarah Riedlinger

H

EAD 4,456 miles east of Kent and you’ll find Florence, Italy – or Firenze, as the Florentines call it. It is a city bursting with hundreds of years of history, from the bottom of the cobblestone streets all the way up to the Piazzale Michelangelo. It is a city where the Italian language was created, the Renaissance was formed, and, of course, the home of Gucci.

Meander another 4,919 miles further east and you will be greeted by the friendly city of Chengdu, China – home of the world’s largest giant panda reserve, and the capital of the Sichuan province that inspires so many of the American Szechuan dishes that are abundant back in Kent, Ohio. As the third largest city in China, it has a rich history dating back to 311 BC and a strange obsession with Peppa Pig. Though these two regions are wildly different and frustratingly far from the Northeast Ohio city most of us have grown to love, they both have been providing Kent State students with the opportunity to visit and study in their home countries. Kent State students have traveled abroad in Florence, Italy for more than 40 years, and the Sichuan, China program has been offered through the College of Communication & Information for the past three. As most alumni from their programs will tell you, these two cities – though half a world away – offer a way for us to become better humans.

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FLORENCE

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ITALY

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PHOTOS BY Sophia Adornetto

Walking down the cobblestone streets in Florence transports you back to the days of the Renaissance. Located in the heart of Florence, the Duomo1 is one of the biggest tourist attractions due to its ornate architecture and the numerous cafes surrounding the cathedral. You can grab a hot cappuccino and flaky pastry in the radiating sun while admiring the incredibly beautiful structure in front of you. If you walk down Via dei Calzaiuoli, you’ll come across Palazzo Vecchio and the Uffizi art museum.

You will also see street artists2 displaying unique works while demonstrating their creativity to onlookers. On the next street

over, Via Calimala, you will see many stores, cafes and more street artists who use the ground as their canvas.3 This street artist is using chalk to recreate a biblical painting. After you are done looking at the gorgeous street art, keep walking down Via Calimala and you will find yourself on the Ponte Vecchio,4 translated to “the Old Bridge.” The bridge hosts many jewelry stores if you want to buy something for yourself or just window shop.

You can also view the Arno River on both sides of the bridge. I definitely recommend going at sunset – you won’t regret it.

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CHENGDU CHINA

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PHOTOS BY Sarah Riedlinger

If you don’t speak Mandarin, visiting the city of Chengdu, China might seem like a stressful trip – but the friendly locals of Jinli Street,1 one of China’s biggest tourist shopping streets, will help translate for you, especially when they want you to buy their handcrafted teas. Finding a large plate of steaming dumplings and mouth-numbing spicy noodles2 is never a challenge in the Sichuan province. Despite all the heat your mouth may feel from the famous Sichuan peppercorn, you’ll want to con-

tinue braving the heat to see the juxtaposition of modern and traditional Chinese architecture along the Jin River.3 After spending some time perusing among the Chengdu locals, you can learn about the many deities4 of China’s largest religion, Buddhism, within the spiritual halls of religious monasteries.

On the walk back from your day in the city, you will pass a garden pavilion surrounded by a pond full of lotus leaves, and surely all will feel right and tranquil in the world.

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THE GRASS

GREEN The Earth is slowing dying: saving her starts by making changes to be more eco-friendly

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COULD BE

ER

WORDS BY Cheyenne Petitpas

O

PHOTOS BY Jenna Breedlove & Anna Lawrence

N JUNE 22, 1969, the impossible happened: a river caught on fire.

The Cuyahoga River was so polluted that floating debris in the water caught fire from the sparks of a passing train.

This wasn’t the first time the river caught fire either. The Cuyahoga River caught fire 13 times since 1868 and was once named the most polluted river in the United States. With the fire’s 50-year anniversary approaching, now is the perfect time to take a step back and evaluate our environmental contributions.

The fire was a tipping point in environmental awareness and encouraged laws to be established in order to help the environment. One was the National Environmental Policy Act, which “promotes the enhancement of the environment.” Another was the Pollution Superfund, a government controlled fund that stores money away to ensure that a company’s pollution can be cleaned up if it goes out of business and leaves the area.

Photo by Jenna Breedlove. Young sprouts basking in the midday sunlight on a ledge inside Kent State’s Herrick Conservatory.

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The responsibility is not just on industries, though. For years I’ve been guilty of not looking into my habits. Recently, I started to delve into the eco-friendly lifestyle and think more carefully about my actions.

recycling factories. Plastic straws end up slipping through the grates, contaminating the recycling load or just getting thrown out anyway. Not to mention the plastics straws are made from isn’t recyclable to begin with.

According to Melanie J. Knowles, the manager of the Sustainability Department at Kent State, there is a shared responsibility between producers and consumers in terms of being environmentally sustainable.

In response, many companies started selling glass or metal reusable straws. Buying a pack of reusable straws is an inexpensive way to make a big difference. I knew plastic straws were bad, but it wasn’t until I came to Kent that I was encouraged to use them. I ordered myself a pack off Amazon the day after I saw my friend use one.

They even sell reusable straws at the on-campus bookstore, which I also happily purchased.

Knowles mentions the phrase “reduce, reuse, recycle,” and how the words are listed in order based on effectiveness. Knowles asks, “How can we reduce, what is reusable and for what is left to recycle? What is the easiest way to do that?”

The answer is environmental sustainability.

Knowles describes environmental sustainability as a condition benefiting all three pillars: environment, equity and economics. Something is environmentally sustainable if it is helpful to the environment, beneficial, convenient for people and doesn’t plummet the economy.

When people don’t go the extra foot to help Earth, I’ve noticed it’s because it’s inconvenient and not a habit. People don’t realize it’s easy to start a new habit and rid of harmful habits with ecofriendly ones.

Aramark, Kent State’s food service provider, is introducing changes encouraging sustainability.

Aramark sells reusable bags and mugs in their markets to promote reusable materials, including reusable straws.

The plastic straw controversy is one that encourages a lot of people, including me, to take their first step in being eco-friendly.

Plastic straws, among other plastics, are harmful to marine life, specifically sea turtles. Straws usually end up in the ocean where they’re broken down into microplastics which some marine life may mistake for food. The University of Georgia’s New Materials Institute conducted an experiment in which 96 sea-turtles were studied and every one had some amount of plastic in their system. While 27 were rehabilitated, the rest died with the suspected cause being from “blockages or nutritional deficiencies associated with plastic ingestion.”

Simply recycling straws is also not the answer.

According to For A Strawless Ocean, an organization that strives to remove and stop the plastic pollution in the oceans, plastic straws are too small to make it through the sorting process in

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Another simple way to cut out plastic use is by using reusable water bottles.

While plastic water bottles can be recycled it’s not an easy process, and it’s still plastic being used that doesn’t need to be. With the plethora of fountains around campus, including many with water bottle filling stations, you can top off your bottle for free as much as you want.

Sydney Townsend, the founder and president of the Kent Sustainability Club, suggests using a collapsible water bottle. It not only reduces the use of plastic bottles, but it’s made of silicon, which doesn’t add plastic to the environment.

The best part is it’s collapsible, so it can fit in a purse or backpack.

Townsend explains she turned against any type of plastic after watching documentaries. She recalls learning that, “there’s no way that plastic can be safe.” Even BPA free plastics are still harmful to the environment and humans.

Making a small change can create a ripple effect and make a difference in the way we’re treating our world. Plastic bags have alternatives, for instance. Some stores have an in-store bin to properly recycle plastic bags for you while paper and reusable bags cut down on plastic waste altogether.

The smallest of actions can help the Earth, but there’s still a problem with the recycling system.

edge about recycling and if they don’t recycle, why that is.

I never know what’s able to be recycled unless there’s the nifty little triangle on the bottom of it. Before, I’d usually just throw something in the recycling and hope it works, but I wasn’t aware that doing that resulted in contamination.

Knowles explains the recycling streams on campus and how they work. The idea is to get as many recyclables as possible, which she believes is advantageous for Kent. However, Knowles adds that, “even if people only put in recyclable items, there is a bit of contamination that happens.”

America used to send recyclables to China to be sorted and recycled, but issues arose that created the National Sword, a restriction from China on recyclables we send over. The National Sword wants a contamination rate of less than .5 percent, but U.S. recycling facilities believe it’s not possible to sort materials and end up with a contamination rate of less than one-half of one percent.

Some people worry that even if they do recycle, the materials aren’t actually getting recycled. To fight these claims, Kent has videos on their sustainability/recycling page proving what happens when something is put into a recycling bin. The video shows everything that is put in the bins gets recycled.

Angela Diebel, a sustainability minor notices the bins and dumpsters for recycling are always smaller than the one’s for the landfill. She mentions a study conducted at Kent State to find out if smaller plates, as opposed to bigger plates, helped control portion sizes and helped students lose weight.

David Sharp, a nutrition professor at Kent State, comments on this experiment. “When we are bombarded with the appeal of getting things bigger or larger, it creates a bit of dissonance that the message for our most intimate choices such as our meals, our plates and our bodies runs opposite to our culture of plenty when considering long-term health and wellness,” he says.

The experiment found smaller plates make it seem as though there’s more food in one serving.

On a bigger plate, the servings look smaller.

A big issue with recycling, especially on Kent’s campus, is the lack of knowledge about it. Most people don’t know what is recyclable and what isn’t. People then give up trying to recycle and throw recyclables landfills, or they recycle “When it comes to filling up the bin, it’s a very something that contaminates the recycling similar mindset,” Diebel says. Naturally, you stream. A survey through Kent’s Sustainability want to fill up empty space. If recycling bins Department questioned students on things like were bigger the trash bins, they would take more if they recycle, what they recycle, their knowl- recyclables to fill it up. We would want to see it

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Photo by Jenna Breedlove. The Fern and Humidity Loving Plant Collection at Kent State’s Herrick Conservatory.

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full, and it would encourage us to recycle more to do so. In turn, the more we recycle, the bigger recycling bins we’ll get and the more frequently that recycling will be picked up.

Photo by Anna Lawrence. Trash and recycling bins around campus depict what should be recycled or thrown away.

Another issue is the carbon footprint we’re leaving.

While we know fossil fuels are terrible for the environment, the alternative energy sources we’ve discovered are either expensive to use or aren’t as accessible as we’d like.

Solar power is healthy for the planet, but it takes up a large area to get a strong amount of power.

Powering cars with electricity helps with the O2 emissions from normal cars, but when it comes from the wall socket, it’s burning all the coal we’re trying to avoid.

There’s an answer many don’t know about, and I didn’t even know about until visiting Kent’s Clean Energy and Sustainability Lab. Here, Deibel gave me a tour and the rundown on reducing our carbon footprint.

It’s called a fuel cell. As Diebel puts it, “It’s a magical black box.” Think of it like a car battery.

It comes as big or as small as needed, and it doesn’t release any of the harmful chemicals into the air that burning coal does. Fuel cells are actually more powerful than the coal-firing plants we’re accustomed to; they can even power vehicles. Kent has a golf cart that is known as a Zero Emission Vehicle (ZEV), and it’s the sustainability lab’s pride and joy.

Fuel cells work by simple chemistry: by combining hydrogen and oxygen, H20 is created. The process generates electricity with the only byproduct being water - which means no harmful emissions. They can even be used as the power source for wall sockets, which prevents inconveniences.

With all this in mind, hopefully improvements can continue to be made for the Earth. Earth Month in April is the best time to get involved and get educated on env ironmental sustainability.

Earth Month is celebrated at Kent State with campus-wide acknowledgment, support, education, motivation and opportunity for being eco-friendly. There are events including plant sales, planting trees around campus and more.

“It’s just one person” is a commonly accepted excuse for not taking five seconds to help the earth. If everyone used this ideology, change

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would never happen. Change has to start somewhere, and it starts with one person wanting to make even a sliver of a difference. Humans tend to copy each other in their actions. When someone sees a peer recycling, they want to recycle.

When someone sees a metal straw being used, they don’t want to use a plastic one for their drink. Even if you think your small action won’t make a difference, it’s still a crumb better than before. Every single action from every single person matters.

The more educated consumers are, the less they’ll support environmentally harmful companies. The more people avoid using plastic straws at restaurants, the more restaurants will be encouraged to phase plastic straws out.

Townsend mentions “putting in your vote for a product” has a huge impact, and what you put money toward reflects what the company produces: don’t support companies that aren’t environmentally conscious. With increasing company ethics transparency, it’s easy to see which companies should be supported and which ones shouldn’t. I found it easier than expected to take a few extra seconds to see if my product was in a recyclable container, if its company supports sustainability and even make sure there aren’t harmful substances in my products.

FOR MORE INFORMATION ON ENVIRONMENTAL SUSTAINABILITY:

visit Kent State’s Sustainability Department website kent.edu/sustainability

volunteer at the greenhouse with the Herrick Club

Saving our world starts with us and our actions.

Don’t be part of the problem. Be part of the solution.

CHEYENNE PETITPAS | cpetitpa@kent.edu

attend a meeting of the Kent Sustainability Club

CUL

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A CULT CLOSE

TO HOME

WORDS BY Lyric Aquino

DISCLAIMER: To maintain the anonymity and privacy of individuals mentioned in this story, names have been changed.

At a dark time when I needed God in my life I found myself a part of what I believe to be a religious cult.

A

S I LOOK BACK on my now-ending college career, I can’t help but reminisce on the simpler times.

Memories creep back into my mind, resurfacing from drunken nights, sleepovers with friends I no longer have and late nights at the library studying ancient tools. I think of them often, my friends. The ones I gained, the ones I lost and everyone stuck in between. I never thought I would have been caught up in a modern-day battle of religion, especially my own, let alone with what I now believe is a religious cult.

friends and the five of us seemed to spend nearly every day together. My class schedule of 18 hours was split into six classes.

The days were long, difficult and stressful. Seeing my friends just wasn’t enough for me; I knew I was missing something.

The depression I’ve battled with since the age of 12 seemed to settle in once again as I felt emptiness surrounding me, encompassing me in a dark void. I longed for a higher power to guide me and to pray to in an effort to escape the surrounding loneliness. It was my emptiness that led me back to my roots.

It was September 2016, my sophomore year in college, and I found myself to be quite lonely. I did have a solid group of

I went home for a weekend to clear my head, see my family and rejuvenate my mind after several weeks of intense work. On

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Sunday, I wound up in church in the same pew singing the same hymns I’ve been singing since I was a child. The light beaming through the brightly colored stained glass windows, striking my face and embracing me like a warm hug. Unfortunately, my peace didn’t last long as the thoughts I tried so hard to suppress wrapped around my neck, constricting like a snake until I was dizzy with fear.

I was still trying to figure out who I was and get used to the responsibility of being my own person. Looking back, part of me knew I needed to find my way back to God. I started to grow my personal relationship with Him and was hoping to strengthen our relationship by joining a religious group on campus that was Christian and matched my liberal views on the world. I couldn’t find one that I enjoyed, and to be honest, I don’t think I was trying too hard after the first few. Some groups were anti-LGBTQ, pro-life or even blatantly sexist. It seemed as though every group and church I tried had something wrong with it that I just couldn’t look past. I knew there had to be others out there like me.

One church, which currently operates on Kent State’s campus, was founded in Columbus in 1970. Today, there are more than 5,500 adult members in 70 home churches.

These “home churches” are smaller congregations of members who gather for Bible studies, teachings, etc.

The first Northeast Ohio group from this church was formed at Kent State in 2001 and later created an on-campus organization.

My friend Sarah told me about this group during my religious crisis and she was a member. They seemed to be exactly what I was looking for. I was hesitant because of my other experiences, but I knew they couldn’t have been so bad because, like me, Sarah is a member of the LGBTQ community and has a similarly liberal mindset.

I wanted their approval with everything I did.

She explained to me where they met on campus and how the group provided snacks and had a social hour before the bible teaching. There was also a hangout session after which eventually lead to “the apartments” (where unmarried members of the group live) and later a bonfire at the apartments for all six home churches at Kent State.

After a short walk from my dorm, we arrived to where the group met. It was a room filled with more than 20 people. Laughs boomed throughout the gathering and snacks were spread onto a table. Everyone smiled; they looked friendly and seemed normal, yet I was so unaware of what was to come.

I was immediately surrounded by Sarah’s other friends Jessica, Brie, Elise and Chelsea - who hugged her as she introduced me. I was receiving so much attention, like a shiny new toy on Christmas morning. Everyone wanted to know where I came from, where I got my shoes, how I did my makeup, my religious beliefs, my ethnicity … I was bombarded with kindness, smiles and offers to hang out and have religious conversations.

After socialising, we found seats among the others and waited for the teaching to begin. I looked around and noticed everyone brought their own Bibles, notepads and pens. The teaching began and I hung onto every word the speakers said about the Lord. This is what I had wanted for so long. It wasn’t a stuffy surmon filled with judgement and direct orders. The teachings that night were about love and light, two of the things I craved so badly in my life. I was asked what brought me to the group and what I thought of the teaching. I was thrilled to engage with so many people and have thought-provoking, real and meaningful conversations about God and the Bible. I needed guidance.

I needed strength. I needed the support of this group.

Over the next three months, I dove head first into everything with the church. I went to a girls-only bible study on Mondays called Cell. It was a time to get away from the boys, support other women, have snacks and discuss the Bible. Cell lasted hours as games and pranks were played, food ordered and another reason was found to continue laughing on the red, second hand couch. On Tuesdays I

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went to teachings. These were open for everyone we wanted to bring. I begged my best friend Kim to come with me even though she wasn’t religious. She found the same comfort I did and joined the group as well.

the meetings, he was skeptical. He would take smoke breaks with some of the members outside, but didn’t go to our Cell group for the guys and didn’t go to the Saturday central teachings unless I went.

After Kim joined, my new friends always wanted me to bring my other friends to home church. “I’d love to meet them,” Jessica said. Her face would light up when she talked about meeting my other friends. It never occured to me that I could’ve set up a separate time and place for all of my friends to meet. I didn’t think of the teachings on Tuesdays as a religious activity because I was just hanging out with all of my friends.

This pattern seemed to please everyone. I often shared our problems with the group because they were my friends. I opened up to them about his issues in religion and they concluded he was lost, sad and needed a strong support system to help him. I agreed that he did need more support, more friends and overall new outlook on life. He needed to see how much people cared about him, how blessed he was.

According to Goodreads, cults use manipulation or coercion to recruit and teach new members, discourage doubt or dissent and try to prevent members from leaving. Throughout my time in this church, I was isolated from people who weren’t in it. If I was friends with someone who wasn’t in it, they would use me as a way to bring them to meetings.

And so I pressured my friends Dana and Eric to come to the meetings because there was free food and it was a laid-back Christian group, it wasn’t uptight like all of the others.

When I told my Nana about the group she looked at me sternly and said, “You better be sure it’s not a cult.” When she said that I brushed it off – what did she know about my friends? About the trips to grocery stores in the middle of the night? The movie marathons? Or what about when tragedies struck and we all banded together to support friends, to care for them, to let them know we were always going to be there for one another?

She didn’t know about any of that.

Dana decided the group wasn’t for her and I took it as a sense of betrayal. I couldn’t fathom that Dana thought she was better than them, than me, than Him. She told me she was “too busy” to be part of the group and I scoffed at her. Pathetic. I wanted her to give me a real reason.

All we had to do was go to Cell for at least three hours on Monday, go to teachings on Tuesdays for four or more hours, go to other prayer events throughout the rest of the week and go to central teachings with all the home churches on Saturday.

Spring semester I was once again taking 18 credit hours, only this time, I had beat reporting. You’re supposed to take this class with a light course load, but because I’m double majoring, I have to take at least 18 credit hours every semester to graduate on time. Naturally, I didn’t have as much time to dedicate to the church group. Mondays were the only day I could dedicate and even then it wasn’t constant. As I had gotten more comfortable with my group, I figured they’d understand if I didn’t go to as many events. But instead they were upset and concerned about my relationship with God. At this point, my family was sick of the useless stories I kept telling about my friends. They were all I wanted to talk about. I wanted their approval with everything I did. I wanted to make sure my girls thought my decisions were smart because if they didn’t have my back, who did? . . .

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Goodreads also says cults claim to offer the only path to salvation. My church claimed they were different than other groups as they read the Bible closely so they had a better chance at salvation, and it seemed that way for a while.

I didn’t get to spend much time with Dana anymore, and as Eric and I grew closer, they wanted to meet him and get to know him especially because they all thought he was going to be my boyfriend. Eric liked me and valued our friendship, so he went.

theburr.com/cult LYRIC AQUINO | laquino@kent.edu

He started making appearances here and there, but his schedule didn’t really line up with the group and although he attended

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WORDS BY Taylor Robinson ILLUSTRATIONS BY Sarah Riedlinger

Housing on-campus affects students’ mental health Kent State requires students to live in a residence hall for at least two years unless they can get an exemption. Some of those students say their experiences were irritating and unwelcoming, which affected their mental health.

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ITTING IN HER BED one night, sob- “As an institution, we strongly believe that bing, senior business management students benefit academically and socially major Lauren Gump promised herself by living on campus for two years,” says she was going to die before 2018 ended.

Kevin Mowers, director of residence life, via an email. “This past fall, students who Gump recalls her mental health first deteri- lived on campus averaged a grade-point-avorating the fall semester of her sophomore erage of 2.98 while those living off averaged year as she was living with her best friend a 2.83. The persistence rate of housing is at in Olson Hall, one of Kent State’s 25 on-cam- 91.8 percent. This means that nine out of pus residence halls. The two of them were 10 students will return to campus after their close, but Gump says something just hap- first semester.” pened between the two friends. They started fighting all the time, and Gump eventually Irritating, difficult and lonely is how Mia stopped feeling like herself.

Davis, freshman exploratory major whose name has been changed, describes her first Kent State requires all unmarried students experience living on campus last semester. enrolled in nine or more credit hours to live in the university residence halls, excluding Davis met her first roommate, a resident summer sessions, until the student has junior assistant (RA), on Facebook, a common academic standing. This is unless they have strategy freshmen use to look for a rooman exemption from the department of resi- mate. A few weeks into the semester, this dence services, according to the university roommate moved out and there was a twopolicy regarding student housing. to-three-week period where Davis was

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living alone in her room. Being new to campus and not having friends yet, Davis felt lonely.

Eventually, a new RA was assigned to the room. Davis says she emailed her new roommate once or twice to see if she wanted to get coffee or talk and set their expectations for each other as roommates. Davis had a feeling things wouldn’t go well when her roommate didn’t respond to her efforts to reach out.

Davis’ new roommate situation was difficult, from her roommate keeping the TV on at night, blasting music after going out and having friends over unannounced. She couldn’t even remember the major of the girl who slept in a bed next to her.

These are all problems students encounter when they first move into dorms.

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Davis describes the experience living with Schubert describes her own on-campus living her former roommate as “the most unwel- experience as both good and bad. coming and uninviting experience I’ve ever had in my life.”

“When I had those rough nights, even if I didn’t get along with my roommate neces“It got to the point where I would try to stay sarily, there was at least somebody else in the in the library or do something with a club so room with me so I couldn’t do addictive late at night so I didn’t have to be in the room,” behaviors and do bad behaviors,” Schubert Davis says. “There were some nights she says. “I couldn’t self-harm with someone else would go out and those were the nights I in the room.” would stay in.”

While she appreciated having another body Nina Schubert, a sophomore early childhood in her space during those rough days for small education major and founder of The conversation and to feel safe, Schubert Nightingale Project, believes students seem describes herself as an independent person to struggle with mental health and illnesses and feels she works better alone. because of the independence they receive when they start college. Finally having that “My bedroom is my go-to safe place. I make sense of independence can sometimes be it as comfortable as possible so if I have a overwhelming for students. stressful day I can go back, relax and take time for myself,” Schubert says. “With a dorm “The Nightingale Project is working to de-stig- on campus, you’re sharing a very small, conmatize mental illness and help give back” is fined space with someone, especially if you the organization’s mission statement. don’t get along with that person, that can Founded by Schubert in October 2017, the cause stress and anxiety or make some of organization focuses on mental health advo- those symptoms you may already have worse.” cacy and creating a welcoming community on Kent State’s campus. Last year, the There is a shift in an environment that can Nightingale Project raised $700 to make lead to depression because there is a change more than 40 blankets for adolescents in psy- of independence, freedom and lack of accountchiatric units. This year, the organization is ability in a college setting, Schubert says. hosting an event called Be-YOU-tiful on April 22 in the student center ballroom, promoting According to Cristina Rodriguez at Texas self-love and body positivity.

State University, adjusting to the newness of

college life can have negative effects on students trying to navigate their new environment, new friends and new classes. Stress accumulates from the adjustment and it can be difficult to cope with the new stressors.

College students are easily overwhelmed by stress and many students may not deal with daily stressors in a healthy way, causing their mental health to decline.

Mental illness occurs more in young adults between the ages 18 and 24 than in any other age group, which is why mental illness may be an issue on college campuses. In 2012, 31.6 percent of students were so depressed that it was difficult to function.

Schubert explains when she was living on campus, even basic hygiene routines became difficult. Some residence halls on campus have private bathrooms or suite-style private bathrooms, while others are “pod-style” community bathrooms that require students to leave their room, go down the hall and use their key card to swipe into the bathroom.

“On those very depressed days, I wouldn’t want to go down the hallway, swipe in, swipe out.

My personal hygiene took a hit while living

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FEATURES in a dorm and worrying about shower space and “Our student staff members are trained in spot- Davis came to the conclusion by Thanksgiving cleanliness, which can cause stress and anxiety,” ting mental health concerns and getting those break – her living situation wasn’t getting any Schubert says. students connected to resources,” Mowers says. better. After she went to an RA on a different “We put our staff through extensive training that floor for help, she waited until the end of the Unable to get out of bed, lacking an appetite and covers a variety of topics that impact mental semester and eventually moved out of the room never having felt so down, Gump decided to go to health, interpersonal conflicts, personal well-be- without telling her roommate. the on-campus health center to see a therapist. ing. We will often partner with campus resources, local agencies and national organizations to Now, Davis lives in a single room with one suite“One day, I couldn’t stop crying during a session and provide training for our staff.” mate she has talked to a few times, briefly. She decided to go on medication to help,” Gump says. says she loves being able to go back to her room According to a 2011 report made by the National after a bad day and feels free not having to deal Schubert explains that students should take Alliance of Mental Illness (NAMI), 27 percent with a difficult living situation. advantage of the services on campus like the of students struggle with depression and 11 perCounseling Center in White Hall, which serves cent struggle with anxiety while in college. Of “Honestly, when I was moving all my stuff out, I as a training clinic for graduate students in the all the students who struggle with mental health was so happy,” Davis says. “It felt like I was Counselor Education and Supervision program. and illnesses, only 55 percent of students breaking out of a shell. I felt like I could finally The services in White Hall are free to students, accessed mental health services and support enjoy college. It really affected my mental health which is a good resource if students worry about systems on campus.

– I shouldn’t be crying in my room of all things. I their parents finding out or finances. have enough to deal with. There were some nights Gump went through Residence Services and was where she would go out and I would lay in bed able to get out of her housing contract for the and cry and think, I need to apply for another spring semester during her sophomore year. She room, I can’t do this anymore.” began commuting from her mother’s home in Warren, and she hasn’t talked to her former Mowers advises students to pull their RA aside friend and roommate since. and talk to them about what is going on or go to the residence hall director’s office. Every floor “Being with family made a huge difference, in every building on campus has multiple staff talking to someone and talking about it helps,” members there to help students.

Gump says. “I go to therapy in the health center “We have a partnership with DeWeese Health a couple times a month. I always talk to my mom “Don’t bottle it up,” Gump says. “Talk to someone, Center in which programs and activities are and dad when I’m feeling really sad or having a whether it is a friend, therapist. Just talk to available for our students who are struggling rough day. They know what to say to bring my someone.” with mental health concerns,” Mowers says. “In spirits up.” addition, we offer events throughout the year in Schubert’s advice to anyone struggling is to just which stress relief or reduction is a major part Gump is set to graduate in December 2019, be honest about it. It can be scary, but taking of the activity. We want our students to find and while she keeps herself busy with school those first steps and talking with others will help. balance in their involvement so that they can and work, she says she still experiences those find a good resolution to some of their mental dark times and days. She now lives in a house “Don’t be afraid to ask for help. I think that’s the health concerns.” with two roommates and feels her current biggest issue,” Davis says. “If you have a bad living situation has made her mental health feeling, it’s probably right. You know what you’re Mowers says all student staff and professional deteriorate once again. Feeling like things going to accept and what you’re not going to staff are trained in getting students connected aren’t getting any better, she is in the process accept. If you’re already not liking the vibe, it on campus to the resources to help with their of moving into an apartment and has signed a probably is not going to change.” specific needs. lease to live alone.

TAYLOR ROBINSON | trobin30@kent.edu

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I FEEL THAT | SPRING ‘19

THE

LAST SHOT WORDS & PHOTO BY Bobbi Broome

A

BOUT TWO WEEKS AGO, I was unsatisfied with my photography. My inspiration was wearing thin. Things are so busy lately, the hustle and bustle of juggling class and work. One day, I was in the art building recording an interview for student media on campus. Behind a dimly lit pillar, I saw a blue glow coming from the wall. I looked behind it and gasped. I had seen this abandoned-looking hallway before. I saw the broken glass. But this time, it was different. Illuminated with royal blue and hints of purple light, I could not tear my eyes away from its magnificent beauty. Immediately, I whipped my camera out, crouched to the floor, and snapped a picture. I found beauty in the little things. This picture represents the moment inspiration hits. It represents the little victories.

AWARD WINNING JOURNALISM The Burr received five regional Mark of Excellence awards from the Society of Professional Journalists in 2019.

Two submissions are competing at the national level.

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