The Cascade June 24th, 2011 Volume 19 Issue 16

www.ufvcascade.ca June24, 2011

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FRIDAY,

Cry Havocand let slip the fans of Van PAULESAU

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THECASCADE

I've always been a closet fan of riots. I find the idea of arson, civil disobedience, and general hell-raising fairly attractive, even romantic, in the right context. I'd give my left arm to be able to whip my shirt off, set a vehicle on fire, and shout "Freedom or death!" and really mean it.

Which is why I'm a little concerned about that fiasco in Van-· couver after Game seven. Now call me a snob if you must, but when I think of riot; I tend to equate it more with "demonstration" than "drunken brawl." I picture thousands of people uniting to vio-lently protest some moral wrong, not nicking Coach purses and debauching innocent Porta Potties.

Ideally, I imagine something that has a common goal, a legitimate reason for existence beyond greed, booze, and unadulterated testosterone.

The pictures are especialiy troubling. CNN boasts photo after photo of the 18130crowd (generally of the XY persuasion) in Canucks jerseys, posing in front of burning cars. Their passionate conviction is obvious, but I can't help wondering what exactly is so convicting. In several cases, the would-be rioter is also triumphantly waving a Canada flag as if the whole issue is one of nation-

JUNE24th,

2011

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ali@ufvcascade.ca Ali Siemens Photo:KarenMey

al pride. "Come to Canada," they seem to say, "the beer is good, the women are -pretty, and we often burn cars in the streets. Especially if they're foreign imports." Some of these people are also pictured jumping over burning vehicles in what is, presumably, an eloquent expression of their frustration with the established order.

Other protestors are seen making helpful hand gestures normally only seen at rock concerts, which I can only conclude are meant to express their discontent with our under-funded medical system, the abuse of First Nations' land rights, and the HST. Of course, while we're on the ,topic of the horrible sales tax, I

should probably mention that looting is highly improper rioting behaviour. You see, if rioters are gaining material benefits from rioting, then they lose their ability to claim that they are pure and idealistic citizens forced to act by gross governmental abuse. They can no longer shout "Freedom or Death!" in good conscience, but must instead proclaim "I am here to acquire three or four toaster ovens from London Drugs, which I will subsequently sell on Craigslisf under an assumed name*."

These people give their fellows a bad rep; we all know toaster ovens are far too bourgeois for the true . radical.

Ultimately, what I'm trying to

say is the events of last Wednesday are hard to describe through logical means. Some claim that we would have had a riot in Vancouver, whatever Game seven's score, and I tend to agree with them. The riot was, in essence, the combined total of all the tensions of the four playoff series', motivated by the memory of '94, and fueled by a . passion which would have been equally overwhelming in victory or defeat. A-passion which led to actions with no meaning beyond that passion, no purpose except in the immediate moment.

And that, my friends, is no Ionger a riot. That's just plain anarchy.

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FRIDAY,JUNE 24th, 2011

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CelebrateCanada'sdiversityat UFV CHELSEA THORNTONOlympic pride by egging on UFV's THECASCADE official mascot Sasq'ets and the Abbotsford Heat's Hawkey in the UFV will be celebra_ting Can- Mascot Olympics. ada Day one day early this year For more interactive fun, Marwith a festival on the Green on tin Kelly - who Devnich described June 30. Celebrating Canada in a as a man "known for his unique style true to both UFV and the Fra- spirit" - will be coordinating fun ser Valley, the focus of the festival trivia contests and outdoor field will be multiculturalism.

"Stu- games like volleyball and a slip n' dent Life will endeavour to help slide. Kelly is the Special Events the University celebrate all that is Programmer for Student Life with Canadian," Desmond Devnich of a knack for coming up with fun UFV Student Life explained. The and unusual activities. focus on multiculturalism reflects The celebrations will also inthe true nature of our country, as clude the Canada Day must-have census data reveals that Canadi- a barbeque. Student Life will be ans identify with more than 200 serving burgers to all the hungry ethnic origins. The event is being participants, and Baker House organized by Student Life with Residence Services will be providthe help of UFV Athletics, UFV ing salads. To satisfy those with a International, Residence Services, sweet tooth, UFV President Mark andCIVLFM. Evered and our beloved Sasq'ets The festival will feature per- will be cutting a delicious cake formances by the UFV Giddha, during the event. However, if orBhangra, and BoUywood clubs, as. ganizers are trying to make Canawell as performances of First Na- da the celebration's official theme, tions dance, salsa dance, and Taj donuts and Kraft Dinner might be Chi. The Chinese Culture Club, a more appropriate menu: Canada Japanese Culture Club, and the reportedly has more donut 1 shops South Asian Peer Network Asso- and consumes more of the boxed ciation have also been invited to orange macaroni we all know and leave their mark on the event. .love per capita than any other Students can get into the spirit country. of the event by coming dressed in . Although the event is free, the red and white or by getting Cana- UFV Oxfam Club as well as the da flag tattoos, henna body art, or UFV Emergency Relief Club will face paint applied by volunteers be on hand to. accept donations. at the festival. Attendees will also CiVL FM will be playing live mube able to celebrate Canada's wild sic and emceeing the event. See (as in wilderness) side and recent you there, UFV!

Past Canada Day festivities at UFV have included table hockey with Student Life coordinator Martin Kelly...

Canada Day photos courtesy of · Cascade archives.

...Canadian flag tattoos ...

UK study says parents major influenceon teen drinking drink and drink to excess as teenTHECASCADE that students who spent more than agers." However, teens who are two nights per week socializing introduced to alcohol later in life with friends were twice as likely to rby their peers are also at increased While few would be surprised to learn "that a teen's friends and engage in excessive drinking, while risk of excessive drinking, making social life have a distinct impact those who spent over four nights a it difficult for parents to strike the · on their drinking habits, a recent week with friends were more than ideal balance. study has added evidence •of an four times as likely to do so.

While the report seemed to The report's discoyeries led re- still leave many questions about important new factor into the mix: children who witness their pa.r- searchers to suggest that "efforts teen drinking unanswered, it concluded with the suggestion that ents drunk are twice as likely to to improve drinking behaviour reaching out to parents will be an one day engage in regular binge among young people at a national drinking themselves. According policy level are best directed at important step in any government to The Guardian, the study - con- supporting and educating par- efforts to address teen drinking ents." The report expanded on habits - according to BBC. ducted by the Joseph Rowntree Diane Abbott, the Labour Foundation CTRF)- also found that this by advising: "This should include positive messages for par- ):i.ealth spokeswoman, told The the amount of supervision parents Guardian, "This report confirms exercised over their children sig- ents about how they can influence their child's behaviour and stress that the government's failure to nificantly affected the likelihood the importance of parents' own take real action on alcohol pricing of teen binge drinking.

Researchers surveyed 5,700 drinking and what their children is helping to feed an epidemic of youth between the ages of 13 and see and think about this" - as not- teen drinking.

"We should equip young peo16, and discovered that one in ed by BBC. five reported having been drunk Findings of the study must be ple with the skills they need to rebefore they had turned 14. Addi- interpreted carefully by parents sist peer pressure to go out drinktionally - according to The Guard- looking for the best possible solu-· ing. There are concrete lessons to be learned from overseas, where ian - 52 per cent of 16-year-olds tion for educating their children surveyed claimed they had been on alcohol consumption. As JRF tried and tested programmes aim Programme Manager Claire Turn- to reduce alcohol and substance drunk at one time.

In addition to findings about. er. told BBC, "Being introduced to abuse through classroom-based parental influence, the study re- alcohoJ at a very young age - for education. These types of proinforced previous claims that a example, under 10 years old - grammes have had excellent sucyouth's social life has a strong im- makes it more likely that they will cess rates."

ALEX WATKINS pact on drinking habits; it reported

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FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

Canadian strikes reach an impasse AMYVANVEEN THECASCADE

As the first round of negotiations for Air Canada comes to a fairly amicable end for their customer service employees, legislation has turned to deal with the Canada Post lock-out.

According to The Guardian,the front-line staff and Air Canada have now reached a tentative agreement that has addressed all of the issues of their contract except for pensions. Now that they have returned to work after their three-day strike, the future for the rest of the union negotiations has been well established. The next group to negotiate will be the flight attendants, who amount to ·6800 employees. However, there is the fear of government involvement so soon after their strike began. Many, like Dave Ritchie of the International Association of Machinists and Aerospace Workers, argue that the quick work of legislation takes away the employees' right to bargain.

This same attitude towards the involvement of the federal government is a hot topic within the Canada Post negotiations. As Harper's Conservatives lead the way in back-to-work legislation, Jack Layton's NDP opposition want to do their best to protect the rights of the workers.

According to the CBC, the governme~t is currently looking strictly in economic terms as they push for a quick vote for back-towork legislation. This favours the

Image: flickr.com

Nolet-upinpressure onGreece despite vote

Photo: JDR Brown

corporation's ability to get their workers back to working rather than allowing the workers themselves to bargain the terms of their contract at their own pace.

Jack Layton made a speech to Vancouver postal workers who had been locked out, assuring them that the opposition will stand by their "right to negotiate a fair contract with the employer" (VancouverSun).

CBC reported that 48,000 Canada Post employees have been locked out after almost two weeks of rotating strikes across the country. Though the negotiations are still in progress, pensions remain

Image: flickr.comt

BankofCanada sees biggerriskto banking system

the main sticking point, as it still is for Air Canada.

According to Ian Markham, a leader of retirement research in Canada, "companies more than 50 years old are most susceptible to pension funding shortfalls and are the most likely to try to convert their pension plans" (The Guardian). Though this does affect new hires, the problem arises with established employees who are facing changes to what they thought was a steady pension system.

While Canada Post employees seek solace in the NDP's promise to allow them time to practice

Image: Cascade

Online brawls maybefractious hackers' downfall

Theroguehackers behind brazen cyber attacks are Thereisa slightly bigger riskofinstability inthe Europe keptthepressure onGreece topush clever online technicians buthavea critical human Canadian financial system thantherewassix forward witha painful austerity program on personalities pronetoinfighting debtbeingthe frailty-petulant Wednesday afterAthens cleared thefirsthurdlein _monthsago,withhighhousehold thatmayspelldisaster fortheirraidsonspies, maindomestic trouble, theBankofCanada said avoiding a sovereign default. banksandcompanies.

European leaders congratulated Prime Minister onWednesday.

Atleastthat'sthehopeamong statecybersleuths Financial System Review, the George Papandreou onsurviving a confidence Initstwice-yearly totrackdowntheLuiz Security (LulzSec) ofover-borrow- racing votebutclearly wantedtokeepthegovernment's bankonceagainraisedconcerns hackers responsible forawaveofattacks onWestingbyhomeowners butitsaidtheriskposedby feettothefireinthemoredifficult nextstage andmultinational companies. sinceDecember. erngovernments --implementing reforms rejected bymanyofthe thattrendhadnotworsened Britain arrested a 19-year-old manonTuesday as "Even withanimproved economic outlook, population. partofajointinvestigation withtheU.S. FBI into households cannotcontinue borrowing indefi''There isnoalternative.

Wehavea plan,nowit's which claims responsibility forcomputer thegrowth ofdispos- LulzSec, timetoactonit,it'stimetoimplement it.Thereis nitelyata ratethatexceeds ontheU.S. CIA, Britain's Serious Organized thecentral banksaidinthereport. attacks no·alternative.

ThereisnoPlanB;'European Com- ableincome;' Crime Agency (SOCA) andSony Corp. comments froma June15speech by mission spokeswoman PiaAhrenkilde-Hansen Itrepeated toppoliceman called thearrest"very sigBankofCanada uovernor Mark Carney that"some Britain's tolda newsconference.

LulzSec rejected suggestions theteenager intheaccumulation ofhousehold . nificant:' Chancellor Angela Merkel, leaderofEUpaymaster moderation wasa leading figure.

Germany, saidGreece mustmoreaggressively debtisexpected:' Theyoung cybervandals aresotechnically risk,however, in privatize state-run firmsandboosttaxrevenues. Thebankdoesseeanincreased thatrelying onintelligence and spillover effects fromtheEuropean accomplished Shesaidtheconfidence votewasanimportant thepossible agencies tobeatthemwould bea mistake, debtcrisis aswellasfromexcessive risk-taking in security stepbutGreece mustnowpushthrough the say.Thealternative istoturnthemagainst advanced economies bymarket players attraqed experts reforms European Central BankPresident Jeaneachother--afeattheInternet's anonymity and byultra-low interest rates.

Claude Trichet, headofa newfinancial super. thehackers' self-absorption andcompetitiveness "Sovereign riskandpersistent weakness inthe watchdog, saidwarning lightswereflashing red makes easier. banking sectorcouldhavespillover ontheeurozonedebtcrisis.

"Themessage isthat European "Ourbestbetquitehonestly isthefactthattheyare elsewhere, including Canada;' itsaid. itisthemostserious threattofinancial stability;' effects eachotherquitehappily;' saidTony DyDirect exposure ofCanadian bankS toperipheral allattacking hesaidinFrankfurt. asecurity expertatBritain's ICT K~owledge European debtisminimal, butindirect exposure house, Transfer Network. ismoresubstantial through linkages toU.S.and Reuters European banks, thebanksaid.

Reuters Reuters

their rights, Canadian citizens and non-profit organizations are feeling the pressure of a locked out postal system.

CBC noted that organizations such as Canadian National Institute for the Blind (CNIB) are feeling the financial weight of hiring couriers in lieu of the locked out Canada Post. They depend on the deliveries of recordings and the like for those that depend on them.

While some organizations are at a standstill for their members, others, like Smart DM - which is a mail organization based in Toronto - may have to begin lay-offs as their business is at a standstill as

well.

Just as people at corporate and organization levels are; frustrated, those at the .individual level are also at a loss. Brides and grooms, who traditionally depend on mailed-out wedding invitations, have to find alternate and perhaps less convenient means of preparing for their big day.

With disagreements within the House of Commons between the majority and the opposition, and between the corporation and the unions, the lock-out will most likely stay in place for a number of days before an !lgreement or legislation can be put in place.

Image: flickr.com

Image:Department for InternationalDevelopment

FivemillionPakistanis atriskfrom floods, says U.N.

China says nocyberwarfare withU.S.

Uptofivemillion peopleinPakistan areat risk fromfloods thisyear,partlyduetopoorreconstruction andtheinadequate rehabilitation of survivors whoarestillreeling fromlastyear'sepic deluge, theU.N. saidonWednesday.

Monsoon floodsbeganroaring throughPakistan inlateJulylastyear,leaving one-fifth ofthe country --anareathesizeofItaly--underwater, disrupting thelivesofmorethan18million people.

Thegovernment andaidorganisations were criticized forbeingtooslowto respond whilethe military, seenasa farmoreefficient institution, tooktheleadinreliefoperations.

AsPakistan braces itselfagainforitsannualmonsoonseason--which runsfromlateJunetoearly September-theU.N. saysauthorities andthe aidcommunity havelearntlessons andarebetter prepared --evenfortheworstcasescenario.

"Since thebeginning ofMarch, wehavebeenin closecontact withthegovernment tomakesure response isupandrunning andthatwearebetter prepared thisyear," saidManuel Bessler, headof theU.N. emergencies office (OCHA) inPakistan.

"Themostanticipated scenario istwomillion affectees andtheworstcasescenario isfivemillion.

Weareprepared forthesetwoscenarios;' hetold AlertNet byphonefromIslamabad.

There isnocyber warfare takingplacebetween China andtheUnited States, a senior Chinese official saidonWednesday, afterweeks offriction overaccusations thatChina mayhavelaunched a stringofInternet hacking attacks.

Thetwocountries mightsuffer fromcyber attacks, buttheywereinnowaydirected byeithergovernment,Vice Foreign Minister CuiTiankai tolda small groupofforeign reporters aheadofa meeting with U.S. officials inHawaii thisweekend.

"Iwanttoclearsomething up:therearenocontradictions between China andtheUnited States" on theissueofhacking, Cuisaid.

"Though hackers attacktheU.S. Internet and China's Internet, Ibelieve theydonotrepresent any country;'he added .

Bothcountries wereinfactalready discussing the problem ofhacking during theirregular strategic consultations, Cuisaid.

"Theinternational community oughttocomeup withsomerulestoprevent thismisuse ofadvanced technology;'he added.

StateDepartment spokesman Mark Toner declined tocomment onCui's cyber-war comments, butsaid theinaugural U.S.-China Asia-Pacific Consultations inHonolulu hada general regional focus andno particular cyberwarfare agenda.

Reuters

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Reuters

FRIDAY,JUNE 24th, 2011

www.ufvcascade.ca

5

Canada unveils designs for Changes to referendum rnles, UVSS membership discussed at CJIB meeting new $ 50 and $100 bills Bills will no longer be printed on paper in an effort to prevent counterfeiting new system could be as high as ALEX WATKINS THECASCADE $75-100 million, as "the equipment that accepts, processes, or Counterfeiters will soon be dispenses bank notes must be faced with mounting new chal- adapted by financial institutions, cash processers,_ retailers, and lenges in reproducing bank others that accept bank notes." notes, as the Bank of Canada has However, it noted that when officially unveiled . the designs for their new $50 and $100 bills. weighed against the relative costs and weaknesses of the. current The upcoming change - which has been in the works since it was system, consumers will benefit in announced in 2006 - is unique the long run.

The Bank of Canada claims that in that it will see Canada begin printing notes on polymer in- the new notes will also serve as stead of cotton paper. a more environmentally friendly This method was first implealternative to paper bills, as they mented by the Reserve Bank of are more resistant to wear-andAustralia in 1988 and has since \ear and soiling and thus need to be replaced less often. While been adopted by 32 other countries, according to the June 2010 some countries already using the issue of the Bank of CanadaReview. polymer bills report that they last as much as four times longer than The first $100 notes are to begin circulating in November 2011, paper, the bank's review team "estimated conservatively that in and the $50 notes will follow soon after in March 2012. the Canadian environment the The project was conceived af- notes would last at least 2.5 times ter significant increases in bill longer, on average, than their paper equivalents." · counterfeiting between 2001 and Reducing the amount of bills 2004 - to levels noted in the Bank of Canada Review as "yery high produced will reportedly reduce not only the environmental imby Canadian and international pact of growing, processing, and standards" - left many retailers printing cotton for bills, but also reluctant to accept bills in large denominations. In fact, the re- the waste and pollution g.eneratview reported that "in some re- ed by transporting new and worn gions in 2002, almost one in ten notes back and forth; as an added Canadian retailers displayed a feature, "when the polymer notes sign indicating that they did not reach the end of their useful life accept $100 bills." The release of and have been verified and dethe new polymer bills will be a stroyed by the Bank, they will be recycle cf." stepping stone following numerThe designs for bills of smaller ous efforts by the Bank of Canada denominations have not yet been to increase bill security and edumade public, though the Bank of cate retailers on how to identify counterfeit notes, as well as to re- Canada review stated that they will be "revealed when the $20, duce the amount of falsified notes in circulation and crack down on $10, an:d $5 denominations of.the Polymer series are unveiled some those who produce them. months before each is issued The Bank of Canada estimated through 2012-13." that the cost of implementing the

CFS members approve creation of Chief Returning Officer and a new National Day of Action BRIANA HILL several factors affecting this includ-

The particular section of Bylaw 1 ing the number of students who regdealing with certification and decerCUPOTTAWABUREAUCHIEF ister for summer courses," she added. tification now reads: "For each vote OTTAWA (CUP) - Delegates The budget committee's report to certify,the national executive shall from across the country discussed was well received, with some discus- recommend an individual to serve campaigns, referenda and a new sion surrounding the litigation and as the Chief Returning Officer. The Day of Action as they helped de- membership drives and referenda Chief Returning Officer's appointtermine the direction the Canadian expense lines. ment is subject to ratification by a genFederation of Students (CFS) will Litigation expenses for the 2011 eral meeting of the federation." take over the next six months at their year-to-date are $59,497.44,up from The same practice will be applied semi-annual National General Meet- $25,392.43in 2010. for votes on continued membership.

The 2011 budget had laid out '"Ihere were numerous discusing held in Gatineau, QC from May 31 to June 3. Opening and closing $60,000.00for membership drives and sions around the motion to have a plenaries were generally friendly in referenda, but the 2011 year-to-date CRO, and in the end, members detone, and member locals pi:esented expenseshave reached $232,980.21. cided on a structure that is very simia collaborative approach to the isDubois believes that the amount lar to that of most students unions," sues dealt with over the course of the projected for the 2012combined bud- Dubois explained in an email '"Ihe get is more reflective of spending - National Executive will be discussing meeting. trends.

Incoming CFS national chairperthe best way to implement what was son Roxanne Dubois felt the four"In the past couple years, circum- adopted by members." day-long meeting was an overall stances have made it that that line Furthermore, according to the upsuccess. wasn't necessarily where it's sup- dated bylaw, the CRO "shall be the "'This meeting allowed every- posed to be, so the expenses have sole arbiter of w\,.ether materials are body to have plenty of discussion, been higher;' she explained. misleading, defamatory or false" dur'~t the same time, the amount that ing a campaign. then come out with a really positive, energetic feeling," she remarked. was projected is more in line with Any appeals of the referendum reA marked departure from the rela- what has been standard spending for sults or of the rulings of the CRO will · be referred to an appeals committee, tive cohesiveness of the meeting was that line item in the past few years:' In the campaigns and government ,to be composed of one member from the recognition of the University of Victoria Student Society's (UVSS)ref- relations budget line, $338,756.53has the national executive, or an individerendum on decertification from the been spent out of the $567,000 set ual chosenby the national executive, federation. aside in the 2011budget. During clos- plus two individual CFS members Dave Molenhuis, former national ing plenary, several locals discussed who are not members of the national chairperson, saidhe was "surprised, the need to increase campaigns executive and are elected at a CFS saddened, but respectful" of the spending. general meeting.

At the campaign end of discusUVSS' decision to leave the organizaSome changes to CFSmembership tion. referendum rules also successfully sions, delegates enthusiastically Ratification of the referendum is passed, including a motion presented passed a motion to implement a Naby the York Federation of Students to tional Day of Action for the 2011-12 pending the payment of outstanding fees which the UVSSunderstands to eliminate the referendum oversight academic ye~ though there was be membership fees for the 2010-11 committee and replace it with a Chief much indecision about the focus it academic year, up to June 30.

Returning Officer. would take. Some discretion will be "'The fees will be remitted as soon Previously, an individual referen- left to individual locals, however the as we have them from the university, dum oversight committee was struck general emphasis of the concerted each time a referendum was held on a lobby effort will be on rising students which will complete our departure from the CFS;' Tara Patterson, chair- university or college campus and was fees and debt The Canadian Federation of Stuperson of the UVSS, explained in an composed of two people· from the campus' student association or mem- dents is expected to meet next in Noemail ber local and two people appointed "We are yet to have exact vember fur its sewnd general meetmation of the amount as there are bytheCFS. ing of 2011.

confir-

6

www.ufvcascade.ca

FRIDAY,JUNE 24th 2011

A Defence of Profanity

UniversityAbsurdity fi.astrated «->;th ,Po/;":) .f'or an ~Y lot, 5tl5 ume,'/s the,·,- ne«.>, /a/,'sh Cyet a/'.f'ordable) ba,'/d,'"3·

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public discourse. Stations and newsJDRBROWN TH£CASCADE casters are fined for daring to utter deserved insults or scatological exCommon and widespread, pro- clamations, while the quotations of fanity remains something of a taboo. ordinary persons are censored ruth- _ We are encouraged as children and lessly. .adults not to use words like fuck or The justification f~r all of this shit, and are taught to become of- commonly turns to the 'innocence fended or indignant when they are shield.' We must protect those with directed toward our own selves. This deli,cate sensibilities from hearing fear and reproach toward profanity such filth! Children (and in previis absurd. We must defend profanity, ous centuries, women) are not fit to not whitewash it into oblivion. hear anything that might impugn There are two arguments that are upon their natural chastity. When often employed to defend the use of considered critically, the 'innocence profani~ and both remain as hope- shield' quickly unravels into dogless as the opposition to vulgar lan- matic chanting of arbitrary social guage itself. The first and most tired convention. Innocence is not being of these is the freedom of speech defended, but ignorance, and that is argument. It argues that limits on the crux of _everythingwhen it comes speech, even the most distressing, to profanity. hateful, or profane are inherently Ignoring injustice does not make dange1"9us and shoµ.ld be avoided injustice go away or somehow turn at all costs. One need not endorse OJ' the world into a more just place. Igeven listen to cursing, only defend its noring profanity is as effective.There use. exist profane things and profane The second defence focuses on words, but ignoring them or refusprofanity as an example of authentic- ing to name them cannot change ity in-language use. Since authentic- this. The only comfort ;my person ity is preferred to falsehoods, profan- receives from saying frak instead of ity should be at least tolerated. fuck is the warm blanket of ignoThe trouble with these arguments rance. is that neither addresses the core of For some, that is not only adthe matter: profanity itself. Those equate but preferred. But for those cantankerous and bland many who who are dedicated to truth, actively would limit and regulate vulgarity choosing ignorance is anathema. in langu~ge remain free to advance I am not so blind as to think that their cause in the absence of a robust every person prefers truth, although defence of the most base and offen- they ought to. Nevertheless, it is time sive ctll'se. And they do, too. that those brave enough to curse take In print and broadcast media, fed- up the most deserving cause of all. It eral and provincial legislation stand is time that the profane be called proatop a mound of codes-of-conduct fane; and that everywhere ignorance and editorial pledges which all, in reigns, it is challenged and exposed some way or, another, conspire to as the bullshit it is. chase colourful language from the Let this tyranny of etiquette end.

'

Regulation-nolongterm fix for Netflix SONJA SZLOVICSAKYes, Netflix, Apple TY, and other

over-the-top services are a threat to THECASCADE Canadian broadcasters. They bring · television and movies to viewers on demand, and (for now) it's comIn an open letter to the Canadian Radio-television Telecommunica- mercial free and cheap. And while tions Commission (CRTC),a group OTT services are not necessarily of media industry executives called pulling audiences away from traon the CRTC-to assess the impact of ditional television broadcasting, foreign over-the-top (OTT) services they are pulling television away on Canadian culture and broadcast- from traditional broadcasting. Holing. While many Canadians have lywood is beginning to sign with never heard the term "over-the-top these services, and they're doing so services," they've probably used exclusively. This is a win for Netflix fans that are sick of watching Titanthem. Since Netflix came to Canada, over-the-tot>services have account- tic 2 and TheHumanCentipede,but a ed for approximately one third of all loss for Global and CTV. Canadian video streaming during peak hours. privately owned broadcasters rely on the advertising they receive from Naturally, Canadian broadcasters cheap American programming to have noticed this.

Essentially, this letter calls on the subsidize Canadian content We are seeing just the beginCRTC to regulate services like Netflix and Apple TV. This is not only ning of OTT services. But considera terrible idea, but nearly imposs~ble ing the success, in a few years the to do without regulating the inter- market will explode and there will be far more businesses providing net itself.

these services. To begin to regu, late these services now will hinder their growth. And since Netflix works on an "on-demand" format rather than scheduled broadcasting, there is no way to force them to show Canadian content for any amount of time.

At best, these services could be forced to carry Canadian content in their libraries. However, since Canadian content is far more expensive to produce than its American counterpart, and is shown across a much smaller audience pool, it is far more costly for a broadcaster to purchase rights to a Canadian show, which, of course, would increase the attractively low price of OTT services.

Yet that's still not the biggest problem with regulation. For now, these services are based out of the United States, so in theory the CRTC would be able to hand out some sort of fines if they were to violate any regulations placed on them. But as

New movie& to watch instantly

these services grow in popularity, more businesses will pop up offering the same services. How will the CRTC regulate a Netflix based in Sweden? China?

They can't. Not without blocking access to th1;se services entirely.

And since the CRTC has not taken a firm stance on net neutrality yet, there is still a possibility that Netflix Sweden may not be accessible in Canada.

Of course, even if OTT services were regulated and a-okay according to CRTC guidelines, it still

doesn't mean Canadians would have any interest in purchasing them. As it is now, almost any television show can be watched after a quick visit to the Pirate Bay or IceFilms.

If Canadians have any interest in seeing Canadian programming in the future, they should urge the CRTC to not regulate over-the-top services. Instead, they should push broadcasters to create a Canadian version of Netflix, one with quality Canadian programming that Canadians actually want to watch.

Ali "Kangaroos areprettycool,but sugargliders

KSII The Question: What is y~ur favourite Marsupial?

Images:JDRBrown

arebetter.I wanta housefull of them,so that

my catsand[thesugargliders]couMform a gangand take<JVer the streetsofAbbotsford."

7

www.ufvcascade.ca

FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

Op Ed: The left-wing scapegoat in Vancouver's latest hockey riot

Unemployed~nd unsatisfied ALISIEMENSducing my qualifications. If I put that

THECASCADE however, routinely referred to the to do it. looters and vandals as anarchists.

To be an anarchist one must, at My first job was at McDonalds.

The rhetoric used therein displays the very least, understand and agree . a dysfunctional, distorted view of with the idea of anarchy as a political I was thirteen and eager to make who anarchists are, what they do, structure. Participating in destruc- six dollars an hour for my first 500 and whathappened both in Toronto tion for no apparent reason does not hours. The work was relatively easy. and Vancouver during their respec- . qualify.

I was able to make new friends and At the risk of being subjective goof around while working. I look tive riots.

Anarchy is often defined as a and arbitrary, most anarchists aren't back on that job and miss how I lack of structural order or singular in. favour of chaos and_disorder as could spend my money frivolously leadership within a state. It is often a ·rule, they si.J.:nplyprefer a gover- and not have to worry about any discussed in the context of chaos and nance model of consensuai decision rent, water, or gas bills. Today, not disorder, such that a mess or disor- making, where the top down func~ only do I worry about those very ~ills, but also I worry about finding ganized situation may be described tions of democracy and bureaucracy are liquidated and replaced bJ work- a job so I can pay said bills. as anarchic.

AARON LEVY For an individual, however, to be ing groups and collaborative syndi- • Finding a job while I was a teenCIVLSTATION MANAGER referred to as an anarchist, is it suf- calism. ager was an easy task. If you were an Sure, there are some anarchists able-bodied person who was ready ficient to say that said person parto work, people didn't have a probTear gas, rubber bullets, and riot ticipates in a state.of anarchy? Yd say that just want every man, woman, police advancing on a crowd of row- not, but this is the attribution that's and child for themselyes, but those lem hiring you. Today, youth face a dy, drunken, lawless . .'. anarchists? been made-unto people who partici- aren'fthe ones that organize and pro- new and annoying problem: there pated in the recent Vancouver riots. test. _Theylikely do riot, but it's a far is no work. Over the course of two Canadians have seen it happen Individual citizens, who, for at least cry from the Black Block anarchists weeks, I personally· handed out 40 twice this year; burning, upturned resumes, and received two call backs automobiles, and businesses with a time, decided to engage in various that were attributed with organizing their windows smashed out; once in . acts of civil disobedience, were de- and carrying out the protests dur- for interviews.

According to Statistics Canada, relation to a major, international, po- scribed as anarchists: ''Immediately . ing the G20 riots. Despite these nuyouth unemployment is at the highlitical summit, and once in tribute to following the Canucks' Stanley Cup· ances, and fundamental distinctions a similar, less widespread, less easily loss at the hands of the Boston Bru- between the Vancouver riots and the est it's been in 11 years. Between the quashed riot that took place 17 years ins, anarchists began to flip cars over characterization of those involved as ages of 15 and 24, the unemployment ago. One instance was certainly the and light them on fire." It certainly anarchists, the media has paid no at- rate is at a scary 15.9per cent, and as of June, 33,000 jobs will have been result of a strong and organized fac- makes them a party to an anarchic tention to the divide.

So, while it's fair to say that downlost. At this point, in our economy, tion of anarchists, but the other? Not series of events, but finishing my dinner quickly doesn't make me a town Vancouver was beholden to a it does not matter how educated. you so much. lawless mob of disruptive vandals are, or how little education you have, It's true that many of the protes- competitive eater.

For an individual to in actuality after Roberto Luongo played the the work is not available. tors and mischief makers in Toronto Most students who are not in for the G20 summit last May were be an anarchist, however, one must worst game of his career, it's not fair self proclaimed anarchists, but that's . actively internalize and believe in to say that 'anarchists' were looting, summer semester use their free time the main tenets of anarchy itself; rioting, and destroying everything in the warm season to work and save not to say that everyone committing for the fall and winter months. While mayhem throughout downtown To- that is to say that such a person may they could. acknowledge that absolute power People were. Hockey fans were. handing out resumes, I was put in a ronto was one.

Similarly, there might have been corrupts absolutely; perhaps they Vancouverites were. Tourists prob- position to tweak_my resume by resome anarchists in the mix of ilie believe that hegemony and the rule ably were, too. But anarchists most Vancouver riots following game 7 of law only function to serve those certainly were not.

Anarchists often protest. They of the 2010-11 Stanley Cup Finals. wealthy and privileged enough to have a hand in determining how sometimes destroy public or private Who's to say there weren't?

But the images we've seen where and when it will be carried out and property. They are regularly inthrongs of hockey fans, Vancouveri- to what extent; regardless of why, an volved in riots where protests are betes, and the like systematically de- anarchist must actively believe in ing suppressed by law enforcement.

Anarchists do not riot over the molished department stores, coffee the benefits of eventual dissolution shops, and tuxedo proprietors, did of what we recognize as certain fac- loss of a hockey game, and mainstream television newscasters and not mntain any evidence that so- ets of our democratic government, whether or not they actively work to writers need to realize this. I hope called anarchists were responsible.

The newscasts we've seen have, make that happen or agree on how you already do.

I was educated at a university, no one would hire me because they knew it wouldn't be long term. As much as I am willing to serve coffee and wipe tables, no one is interested in hiring a returning student. Businesses that normally rely on grants from the government to staff their company for the summer have to go without this summer. This naturally means students have to go without work as a result.

This essentially creates a· downward spiral, especially for students.

If we are not making enough money to meet our immediate bills (not to· mention the nag of credit card debt), we are forced to take on more stu-. dent loan debt. If we are just borrowing more money from the government, can the budget not be shuffled around a little so we have the opportunity to make our own hard earned cash rather then relying on debt?

If a student were to receive the full amount of student loans for two semesters, one would receive approximately $11,000.That's classified as a living below the poverty line!

• The government is supposed to be on the side of youth. Without the youth, our future has nothing to look forward to. We cannot afford to put ourselves through school because we cannot find work in the summer, and without educated people, our long term goals are shattered. Students and youth are willing to go out and work, but instead, our government is forcing us into a position of debt and poverty.

Sex sellslProstitutionin Canada revisited avails of the trade.

JENNIFER COLBOURNE

It is these laws THECASCADE that have recently been challenged in Ontario. At first glance, the laws No matter how you feel about seem reasonable. Nobody wants to prostitution, the fact of the matter be walking down the street and catis that the world's oldest profession called from a hooker. For that matisn't about to go anywhere anytime ter, nobody wants to walk down soon. Prostitution has flourished in the street and be assailed by street the most restrictive societies, and no vendors, Mexico-style. Canadians number of laws, social. censure, or like to be left alone. Making a law punishment are going to make it go to shut up sex workers only allows us to walk by and pretend they're away.

Prostitution isn't illegal in Cana- not prostitutes, and feel better about da. Every activity surrounding it is, our cities.

These are nice enough laws for including a ban on bawdy houses, "respectable" citizens, but dangercommunicating for the purposes ·of prostitution, and living on the . ous ones for sex workex;s. The ban

on communicating for the purposes of prostitution has women jumping into cars with strange men without first discussing price or place and disappearing to who knows where.

It has women skulking about dangerous, lonely areas, such as. back alleys.

The ban on bawdy houses appears to make the same sort of sense. Who wants to explain to t)le kids why so many men are coming in and out of the house next door or XXXbrothels lining the city sidewalks? But again, all this law has done is put women on the streets, instead of the comparative safety of a home or brothel.

This set-up has made it all too easy for the likes of Robert Pickton to prey on sex workers, forced onto the streets and into bad areas.

Making it illegal ·to live off the profits of prostitution effectively makes every sex worker a criminal.

The purpose of prostitution for the vast majority of sex workers is to earn a living. It's not pocket money.

Thus criminalized, calling the police if beaten, threatened, or raped by a . customer becomes dangerous. Often, the sex worker gets thrown in jail along with her attacker.

I can think of a myriad of reasons why we shouldn't condone

Alex

Nicholas "Echidnas, because of their crazydoubledual penis."

"Thosearelike monkeys and stuff, right?"

No

.Paul ''Anarchists."

"Okay.Kangaroo."

prostitution: disease, exploitation, gender inequality. But that's beside the point. If prostitution is going to ~xist, we need to protect our fellow human beings. Canada's out of sight, out of mind attitude does nothing to help the problem and everything to perpetuate the danger surrounding the sex trade. Ironically, most people don't even see sex workers as criminals, but as victims.

Making prostitution illegal doesn't prevent such victimization; it traps sex workers and perpetuates it. Decriminalization and regulation don't mean supporting prostitution; they mean supporting women.

8

FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

www.ufvcascade.ca

Outside the (take out) Box

ChannelSurtinu

penanc; szechuan 33370 _South Fraser Way, Abbotsford , 604.557.9857 www.penangszechuan.com Image oourtesy of nbc.com

Image: Google Maps

day night, however, this was not AMYVANVEEN

THECASCADE the case. After a gentleman in the After pulling into the parking lot of Penang Szechuan, there was the gnawing feeling that ours would be the only table filled. However, this probably had more to do with the fact that it was Game 5, and less to do with any reflection on the restaurant itself. It takes up residence in a little detached building on South Fraser Way just west of Five Corners that used to house a number of other restaurants that have now moved on. The fa<;adeechoes something in the realm of a Spanish villa, but the cuisine is a combination of Malaysian and Chinese.

Even though· it's a tiny little space, the waitress's friendly welcome made us feel right at home.

The restaurant offers eat-in, with about ten tables in the noticeably one-room restaurant, as well as delivery and take-out. With such a small space, it is assumed a level of awkwardness would arise when two parties are right next to each other. On this particular Fri-

apartment across the street blared his air horn, someone at my table felt the need to purchase a live NHL app on her Blackberry while the waitress and the family next to us all periodically listened in; which made for a rare occasion of restaurant camaraderie.

With Malaysian cooking, the appetizer of roti canai is usually the main event, but instead of a doughy treat with a bowl of thick dip, we got a flakier, greasier version with a bowl of dipping sauce. It still had a good amount of flavour, especially with the not-too-spicy homemade coconut curry, but the textures were unexpected.

The menu offers a large selection of everything from pork to beef, poultry to seafood, and everything in between. The ginger and onion beef was tender and well flavoured.

The coconut curry prawn dish and the coconut curry chicken were delicious and full of just the right curry kick that satisfies without burning. The honey garlic boneless pork

was also tasty, but since it was battered and fried, it felt heavy while the other dishes were quite light.

All of the vegetables were cooked to the perfect consistency of not too soft and not too crunchy, and they did not overpower the large amount of meat in the meals.

Some restaurants hold back on the meat portions in their dishes to save money, but not Penang Szechuan. You definitely\get what you pay for. The only rice they have is white and it has to be ordered separately, but with the size of the portions, the meals could have done without.

For a little spot tucked away between a dojo and BCAA this little eatery offers Abbotsfordians a nice Malaysian place this side of the Port Mann. Even though some of the dishes were not what I expected, the service of the staff was rather enjoyable. Our waitress was smiling, involved, and attentive · and shared in the joy of a good game.

However, if you're craving a meal for one, it might be less awkward to order out rather than eat-in.

geles Times.If this is the only thing TREVORFIK THECASCADE that prevents viewers from tuning in, however, it is hardly one of the While it is still far too early to be greatest problems in the history of heralding in the end of long days television. and warm weather, it is reassuring Abrams' name alone will bring to know that at the end of the sum- in those who are curious to see if mer the inevitable seasonal hang- the esteemed director can repeat over that follows will be softened the success of Lost, while the name by the long list of blockbuster tele- brand recognition of Alcatraz will vision series the studios have ar- trap viewers expecting a docuranged for our consumption. mentary on the American landUpfronts, which studios use to mark, only to emerge hours later gain advanced revenue by giving . craving to know what happens advertising executives a preview next. Abrams has a way of making of what their fall line-up has to you cry out in frustration at his offer, has given audiences a sneak- lack of giving anything away, only . preview at what new programto have you come crawling back a ming each channel will offer come · week later desperate to know what this fall. is going on. · If the Upfronts are any indicaAnother television show with tion, this season of television, blockbuster potential, ~nd an amongst other things, will be even bigger director, is the fanremembered · and charactertasy adventure Terra Nova. This ized by its blockbusters. teading prehistoric drama takes place afthe charge are such shows as JJ ter inhabitants of Earth's desolate Abram's Alcatraz and Steven Spiel- future have travelled back in time berg's TerraNova. thousands of years to re-colonize Anybody who was as obsessed the world. with Lost as I was, or who enjoyed With famed director Steven this summer's sleeper blockbuster Spielberg at the helm, the expecthit Super 8, will recognize direc- ed dinosaurs, aliens, ghouls, and tor JJAbrams. Abrams, who has action/adventure that have charenjoyed monumental success on acterized his movies will define both the big and small screen, this series. will be in the director's chair once Just one look at the preview again for the thriller-mystery Al- online and it is evident the studio catraz. Though it will not premier has pulled out all the stops on this until mid-season on Fox and City- one. With stunning cinematograTV, Alcatraz takes place decades phy, and enough action and exciteafter the inhabitants of the famous ment to get any television aficioSan Francisco penitentiary have nado's heart pumping, Terra Nova vanished. The show follows one provides intriguE? and excitement such criminal who has returned, above and beyond most other teleonly to embroil others in the se- vision programming. crecy and cover-up that has charFortunately for viewers, these acterized the famous prison. · two shows are just the tip of the The show stars Sam Neil (Juras- iceberg for television this upcomsic Park),Sarah Jones (Sons of Anar- ing season. Next issue I will look chy), and Lost's own Jorge Garcia. at the Jonathan Nolan-written While the plot reeks of classic · Person of Interest, NBC's Grimm Abrams, one concern is that the (think Buffy meets Supernatural), show may just turn into Lost:Pris- CBS's A Gifted Man, and ABC's on Edition,according to The LosAn- On~e Upon a Time.

Cascadelrcade Sonyand Nintendounvoilcool·deviceswith sillynames JOEL SMARTics, its tablet-style controller stole

If two players each have a tablet, like the different models of Playthey can play multiplayer games Station 3 thaf feature differentlysized hard drives, the .cheaper ing features was the way it could each on their own screen. be aimed at the television screen Another cool feature of the model cannot be upgraded later.

Th~,Vita will have built-in GPS, and used in a variety of game- tablet is that the screen is touchplay mechanics. For example, the sensitive and can even be used · a front-facing and rear-facing camera, Wi-Fi, and Bluetooth technolowith a stylus to create impressive screen could be used as an aiming reticule, zooming in on-screen and drawings. Nintendo even sug- gy. It will also feature a three;axis accelerometer, three-axis electronlining up the crosshairs With the gested that certain multiplayer target. However, the screen could board games like Reversi could ic compass, and a three-axis gyalso be used to increase the view- be played on the tablet away from roscope to provide players with a ing field. One example was to put the living room. The controller is full-range of motion gaming options. Besides the touchscreen, the the screen on the ground during set to feature a built-in gyroscope, accelerometer, a front-facing cam- Vita also offers a touchpad the size a golfing game. It would display the ball, and then, in conjunction era, and a microphone. Other Wii of the screen on the back of the device. This allows additional touch with the Wii's motion-sensitive devices should also be backwards Wiimote controller, ·the player compatible with the Wii U, such as could more accurately aim and the Wii Balance Board. The Wii U should be coming to stores someexecute their shot. However, what was maybe the coolest feature of time in the spring or summer of all was the way the screen would 2012. The PlayStation Vita is set to allow players to keep playing even when the rest of the family want- release at the end of 2011 at two different price points. The cheaper ed to watch TV. A demonstration showed a player simply pausing , model vd:ll sell for $249 wli.ile another version that comes with 3G the game on the TV, and un-pausing the game on the tablet's screen. connectivity will sell for $299. Un-

THECASCADE the show. One of the most interestThe Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) is by far the biggest show of the year for the video game industry. At this year's E3, both Nintendo and Sony unveiled sequels to the game machines that have paid their bills for several years. Nintendo announced the Wii U, sequel to the incredibly popular Wii. The new device comes with an iPad-like tablet as a controller, which allows a portable screen to add to the possibilities of a game. Sony announced a portable device called the PlayStation Vita, which becomes the official sequel to the popular PlayStation Portable (:PSP).The device has two sticks, touch pads, and cameras.

Both devices promise to offer a ton of new software and many new ways to play.

While the Wii U will offer vastly improved high-definition graph-

to play a role, without covering up the screen with fingers. It will also offer full backwards compatibility with the PSP lineup, but only for games bought digitally, as the Vita will not play discs of any kind.

It should be interesting to see the different ways the most creative· minds in the industry will use these features to redefine the way we play games. Although the names are silly and the prices steep, both devices offer the options for some incredibly unique· gameplay experiences that cannot be denied.

Image: fiickr.com

FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

9

www.ufvcascade.ca

BookReview Declareby Tim Powers

THE

RELT

Tits for a cause VIOLET HART SEXPERT Nobody notices protests anymore. Signs, chanting, it's all old hat to us now. Well, there's one thing that will always catch people's attention, titties! And that's exactly what the Ukranian feminist group FEMEN is using to publicize their cause.

With signature flowers in their hair and breasts bared_ to the wind, these college-agewomen are not the harmless hippies they may initially appear to be. Not afraid to use bloody props and theatrics, these women mean business. Their anger and frustration are palpable.

Most recently (Friday the 17, the · very day I am writing this), two. ex- of course, that women have to emtremely different worlds met; while power themselves at itll; but since women in Saudi Arabia organized we have to, why not use what nature to drive cars in protest of anti-female gave us? driver laws, FEMEN supported Does feminism have a place in them by protesting topless with today's world? I think so. As easy as black hijab face-coverings, carrying it may be to-distance ourselves from signs such as "cars for women, camthe issues by saying, "Well, that's the els for men!" It's hard to say whether Ukraine, that's Saudi Arabia," we've Saudi women would be pleased or still got trouble here in Canada. Ev-· horrified by such a method of superybody talks about the looting and port, but nonetheless rm sure they violence at the riot in Vancouver, appreciated the solidarity. but did you know women were beIronically, although at extremes, ing fondled as well? Not the good these women are doing the exact kind of fondled, like that instantly same thing. Whether being out in viral riot kiss, but men grabbing at public-has been sexualized by soci- strange women because they could: ety or just bare boobies, the fact is As if this was expected behaviour, that women worldwide are using these incidents didn't get mentioned the very thingi, used against them in the news, though people were as a source of empowerment Vancalling in about it Sure, we can excouver's recent Slutwalk certainly pect this behaviour from these types falls into that category. It's tragic, of criminals, but what's awful is that

lrmge: arbroath.blogspot.com

it's not even shocking to us. We're more concerned about violations of property than women's bodies.

Women may be the physically weaker sex, and perhaps, since that isn't likely to change, women will always have to fight abuse. So you know what, go FEMEN. Scream, rage, shake your tits. Make a difference. Take what weapons you can to fight the good fight It doesn't hurt the world to see your beautiful breasts, but it sure catches some sorely needed attention.

Ladies, were you aware that you had superpowers under your shirt?

Add ''Violet Hart'' to your Facebook for up-to-date surveys, links, and articles. Or e-mail violethart@ ufvcascade.ca if you have any questions you would like to have answered in Below the Belt.

.

FilmReview Bridesmaids . AMY VAN VEEN

wng;

Thanksto Kristen this breaking point is hilariou,sly displayed.

THECASCADE Maya Rudolph plays her best friend and the bride-to-be ' Paul Feig, who has been involved in male- who excitedly wants her childhoodfriend Annie, played by From director centered classicsthe likes of KnockedUpand WalkHard:The Kristen Wrig, to be her maid of honour (MOH). Annie, unDeweyCox Story,comes a raunchy comedy women can en- fortunately, is hardly in a stable place for someone in their joy. thirties. She has to deal with her quasi-boyfriend and bigIt seems paradoxical to say that raunch can be enjoyed by gest critic played by Jon Hamm, her failed business, Cake the female variety because most humour of that kind is in Lady, which was ruined by an ex-boyfriend, and a trophy the realm of what men seem to find funny. No matter how wife named Helen breathing down her neck and wanting hard I try, I cannot understand how· male genitalia can get to impeach her, all so she can be the MOH On top of all that,. so many laughs. she has the creepiest Australian brother and sister roomWith Kristen Wrig as the co-writer and star, howev~ · mates that have ever been on film and a less than fulfilling there is bound to be a few more laughs than grimaces for job sellingjewelry she doesn't believe in to people she hates. thf targeted lady demographic In the midst of vomiting, It could be rags to riches, with a handsome stranger street defecation, and chocolate fountain freak-outs, the sweeping her off her feet,.but the realism would be lost term "lady'' still applies, because though she has very little What she gets instead is a complicated mess of emotions dignity, the main character Annie has her own coming of with a really nice yet somewhat nerdy police officer and the age story,albeit with a few more laugns than Jane Eyre's. confrontation of a lifetime when Helen stealsher best friend Iri the last couple of decades, female comedians have ana her Parisian .shower idea become something to treasure instead of tolerate thanks It's hard to pick a favorite moment in this film because to Lome Michael's SaturdayNightlive. Tma Fey and Amy every moment is almost too relatable. What would you do if Poehler have certainly found success on their own, but even you were trying on a designer wedding dressand you had their attempt at humor in Baby Mama came off as pitifully food poisoning? What would you do if you were scared of easyhumor in an unrealistic situation. Maya Rudolph and flying and your nemesis gave you pills and alcohol only to Kristen Wrig, on the other hand, find a little more success. have you hallucinate and be escorted off the plane by an air Bridesmaids appeals to every woman who has ever had to marshall? What would you do if you had the opportunity don a hideous dressthat's only purpose is to make the bride to steal nine puppies? look even more beautiful Sure it can be an honour, but it can You would do as Annie did, end the pity party and live also be a headache, as women who normally would never themess ·that is your life because it is, in fact, your life. You socialize are forced to be friends for the sake of the one in only get one, and even if it's crappy, it's worth it white. Every member of a bridal party has a breaking point

ent. When he is introduced, Hale is embittered man THECASCADE plagued by the horrors of a visit to Ararat, but his innocent twenty"Where wast thou when I laid the something self in later flashbacks is a believable predecessor. Unfoundationsof the earth?

Declare,if thou hast understanding." fortunately, the chain of events surrounding Hale is not always -Job 38:4 as _systematic, nor as logical as his Such is one of the quotes with personal character arc. which Tim Powers· opens Declare, This is the big weakness of Powers' book, though it is not, in fact, a a genre-twisting, hopelessly enigreflection of the author's talent. Dematic, jewel of a story, which comclareis not a book that can be fully bines espionage, political intrigue, digested in a single reading, and communists, and the supernatural certain points remain hopelessly into five hundred pages of esoteric confusing even after two or three, brilliance. Pitched as a Cold War spy thriller, Declarehas a level of yet Powers fully acknowledges the convoluted n~ture of his work. detail that will make any history In his "Author's Note" he reveals buff drool, yet it is melded with as that the entire work is constructed engaging a story as has ever been around the exploits of the historical written. You want to learn about figure Kim Philby, and he "made deep-cover communist spy netit an irondad rule that [he] could works in Germany in 1941? Read Declare. You want to learn the sor- not change or disregard any of the recorded facts, nor rearrange any did history of Kim Philby, British traitor, fox-owner, and member of days of the calendar." Much of the the Cambridge Five? Read Declare. confusion in the latter stages of Declareis therefore directly correlated You want to learn the tru~h about the fall of communism, Catholito the confused events of Philby's life, and not a failing of Powers' cism, immortality, and how the three are related? Uh ...what? brilliance.

You see, Declare reveals some And yes, brilliance is the correct historical tidbits that make Area 51 word. The sheer joy of Declareis in its utter originality, its construction look like a smash-and-grab at the of an alternate history entirely novlocal 711. In Powers' eyes, the Cold el in its mechanics and scope. So War wasn't fought over something much of it, from names and dates as pitiful as ideological differences, and T.E. Lawrence's motorcycle ac- right down to espionage practice, . cident was hardly an accident at all. is grounded in hard fact, yet even the impossible elements (i.e. frea-, Lenin's meteoric rise to power was kin' fallen angels) work almost perachieved with the help of a terrifying being, code-named "Mother fectly. Ultimately it makes sense that Soviet Russia was built upon Russi~" (who eventually killed him), and humans are neither the machinations of a supernati.tral and blood-thirsty "guardian the most intelligent, nor the most angel," for how else would such an powerful species on Earth. In fact, much qf Powers' weird marriage of ungainly regime survive for more science and religion comes down than a half-century? It makes sense that the Turkish government has to the existence of a city of beings been hiding the presence of su~ upon Mt. Ararat in modern Turkey, ancient survivors of the Flood it- pematural entities on Ararat for the last hundred years, and that self. Powers describes these beings several of the wars in the Middle as "fallen angels" or "djinn," remEast have been fought over their nants of the Nephilim, and the culexistence. It makes sense that angel tivation of their power is the goal of the most secret of the secret ser- blood, apart from its other qualities, can be combined into a subvices on both sides of the war.

Declare circles and twists stance that grants immortality to those who consume it, and it makes through the story of one Andrew sense tJ;,.atthe.most secret agencies Hale, an Englishman troubled in the world would be tearing each with strange visions, an absent father, and the ambiguous attenother apart in their race to claim this power as their own. tions of the British Secret Service.

It is a shattered narrative scattered In Declare Powers presents a vision of the "the foundations of across three decades of his life and two separate missions in which he the Earth'' as no one has ever seen them before. This book deserves moonlights as a double-agent, yet your time.

Powers does an adequate job keeping most of the tangled plot coher-

PAULESAU a hard-drinking,

10

www.ufvcascade.ca

FRID~Y, JUNE 24th, 2011

r, 1 'Jl·tMI AlbumReView ©IJJ!IV~

Gone to Bolivia- Ben Sures

·1Austra* FeelIt Break

2Battles GlossDrop The Vibrating Beds* The VibratingBeds

3

Fleet Foxes 4Helplessness Blues Long Long* 5Long Shorts Up* 6Fucked David Comesto Life Kidstreet* 7XEP

8

Wanda Jackson The Pary Ain't Over

Likely Rads* 9Legends in Denim White Lung* It's the Evil

lo

Papermaps* ll Papermaps The Bitters* · 12· Have a Nap Hotel·

JOEL SMARTacoustic-heavy melody. The title

THECASCADE track "Gone to Bolivia" is easily the best of the bunch, so it's Ben Sures has a distinctive no surprise why it was chosen ioice and a talent for writing as the name of the album. The lyrics. Originally from Regina, tune is incredibly catchy, yet Saskatchewan, but raised in the opening lines make it clear Western Canada, Sures gets he isn't writing a pop song, regular airtime on <;BC Radio "Revolution is blood and sorand has performed at many Ca- row I Revolution is tears and nadian folk festivals over the morals / The children of Ernesyears. In 2005 he won the John to 'Che' Guevara / Are tired of Lennon Songwriting Contest, his image offered up like soda." out of 15,000 entrants. His new Meanwhile, the ' memorable album, Gone to Bolivia, a fun mix song "Rambling Bones" talks of eclectic folk rock songs, will about a family· that is falling have fans of his music singing apart. "Rambling bones / .pull along like they've known the you to the next departure zone words for years. / Every year is one step closer While it is undeniable that to another broken home / ramSures has more talent in writbling bones." Really though, deing music than singing it, he spite some.of the heavy topics, sings with a sqft passion that every song is pleasant. is instantly likeable and catchy.

Some of the songs, like "The It's even possible the occasional Boy Who Walked Backwards off-tune note actually adds to Through the Snow" and · "In the appeal of his songs. It's a Burma," have some more unique friendly album, and alµwst ev- instnimenta!s.

Some of the inery song has a message. Some of struments used include the vithe sonis, Hke "Everybody Mat- olin, cello, and even the pedal ters," have the type of moral steel. A couple of the songs also that could make it appropriate have background singers. For for younger audiences as well. the most part, though, Sures Although, to be fair, lyrics like sings by himself. "the fat kid on the fat farm" and Like a good Cana(ilian he "the pornstar working hard" even includes a French track in make it clear that Sures isn't ·"Embrasse Papa, Fais Dodo," trying to be Raffi by any means. which has an old-time feel. It Each song consists of tightlyseems that Sures has drawn packed lyrics in a gently-sung, inspiration for Gone to Bolivia

sound

Image: digstation.com

from all over. The album art has a Spanish "Day of the Dead" look to it, though this influence doesn't seem to appear in any of the songs themselves.

• The style ·of Ben Sures seems quile similar to The Decemberists or The Shins, though perhaps a little more folksy.

Although his latest effort is not for everyone, it's a very approachable album that seems

m. in i a I bum

bites

very fitting for · the coming summer. There are some tracks with serious lasting power on this album, and given the chance, most people will find something that appeals to their tastes.

If nothing else, at least check out "Gone to Bolivia" and "Rambling Bones" and see if it doesn't have you humming along in no time.

r·e views

1

·3Fist City* Two Thousandand Ten

14 Get on YourNerves 15 Myelir Sheaths*

We are Enfant Terrible Explicit Pictures

16ScrewsGet Loose 17 Smother 18Fablesof the Sleepless Those Darlins

Wild Beasts

Unexpect

Empire

19The Design is Over The Matadors*

2o~rctic

*CanadianArtist

Monkeys

ArabiaMountain

The Light of the Sun

_BlackLips

Jill Scott

What Did You Expect From the Vaccines?

Bon Iver Bon Iver

The Vaccines

Jill Scott's newest album is a Black Lip(>have been cranking The debut record from the out a mixture of garage punk and cat<:hy and soulful collection of NME-hyped London- quartet The rock'n'roil songs for over a decade songs. that range from anthems now and upon first listen, obvious to ballads that would have been Vaccines is a mixed bag of vague inspiration can be a~tributed to the right at home in the Motown era. Brit-rock influences bereft of the likes of 1970s punk acts the Stoog- Her history is indicative of the al- heart or substance of the band's es and the Ramones. However, bum's sound: she began her artis- predecessors. Singles "Post Breaktheir recent release Arabia Moun- tic career as a spoken word artist Up Sex," and "If You Wanna" tain shows the band digging deep- and then cut her musical eye-teeth shine brightly, but such moments er into the roots of punk. The Son- . with live recordings. The albulI).'s are fleeting and far between on ics, the Byrds, and the Premiers many extended raps and the pure, the rest of the-album. In fact, these come to mind when songs like melodic accompanying voice, tracks serve to bring into sharper relief the record'.s many failures. It "Family Tree," "Modern Art," and then, makes sense. Unfortunately, is a frustrating exercise that seems The Light of the Sun's shortcoming "Get Up And Go" come through the speakers. By employing Mark is its musical accompaniment. The shrugged off and forgettable yet is Robinson, Amy Winehouse's pro- overuse of harps and chime trees punctuated by glimpses of what ducer, to handle the album, you is reminiscent of the final Spice could have been. Alienating the get the sense that the Black Lips Girls album - or perhaps a twelve ' listener even further is a slick are more serious about cleaning year old girls' idea of a; like, totally varnish of reverb that coats every up their lo-fi sound, which can romantic sound. Still, other songs ·song and deadens the albums•few (the ones that aren't too heavy on memorable hooks considerably. sometimes end up a sprawling The✓ sleek production is geared tomess. Robinson wisely steers clear the synthesizer, that is) resonate ward stadium anthems but it isn't from attempting to transform the with a sort of nouveaux sensuality. earned by the songs themselves.

Black Lips' sound and ·plays ball If you can ignore the beatboxing with the band, making Arabia (yes, really) that shows up in other What can you expect from The Mountain the worthy follow up to tracks, and all the other evils this Vaccines? Some temporary relief, Good Bad Not Evil where 200 Mil- album is marred with, it's worth but no radio cure. lion Thousand failed. listening to for Scott's vocal and Nick Ubels lyrical mastery.

Tim Ubels ·KarenAney'

Bon Iver, which means "good winter," seems to have found the inevitable spring with their selftitled second album. With a total of ten tracks, this indie-folk band brings Justin Vernon's songs and voice to a new level thanks to a little more maturity and a little more confidence. The album, which is released on June 21, makes excellent use of the wide range of i.nusical talents within the band itself, as well as those of contributors to the album. Each track represents .a different place, whether it is a real location like "Calgary" or a fictional one like "Hinnom, TX." Vernon gives each song its own voice, while also allowing the entire track list to be cohesive as one. While their first album was recorded in a cabin, this one found a home in a remodeled veterinary clinic, proving this band has something different to offer listeners.

Amy Van Veen

www.ufircascade.ca

FRIDAY,JUNE 24th, 2011

11

CIVL'sMood Swingsreceivesnationaldistinction NICKUBELS

late, great Jay Reatard.

"Jay Reatard, he's number one," THECASCADE Williams said, "I always space on that." Her other go-to groups inDespite broadcasting on 101.7FM clude Sonic Youth, the Pixies, Black for only 10 months, CIVL Radio is Sabbath, The Black Lips, and a bevy well on its way to becoming a highly of local acts the likes of Long Long decorated media outlet.

Long, The Stolen Organ Family Delegates from CIVL Radio reBand, Myelin Sheaths, and The Bturned from the National CommuLines. nity and Campus Radio Association Besides the music itself, another Awards in Halifax· last week with crucial ingredient to Mood Swings' even more hardware to add to their success is Williams' frequent growing collection. themed hours. Past episodes have Not only did UFV's campus radio · focused on parents, work, and art. station bring home the trophy for "'The parents episode I kind of got Community Development but one in trouble for because it was the high of the station's most popular weekly school take on parents, so take that programs, Mood Swings, received however you want," Williams said. honourable mention in the catego"I think that my show has more ry of Best Music Program, beating meaning when I do a theme show, out subn;lissions from many of the even if it's a sort of goofy theme."

NCRA'.s80 eligible member stations.

It was Williams' January 17 FemMood Swings host Alicia WilCon (Female Content) episode that liams was not able to attend the conference but was notified via text won over the judges at the NCRA CM..Radio's.AJica Williamsat work on her show "MoodSwings." awards. The entire episode featured message when it was announce"d Photo:Nick Ubels female-fronted punk bands includthat her show had come in second ing Zebra Stripes, Pylon, and The place. Not realizing how many other programs she had to best in order group of subgenres~ lo-fi, garage, might include selections by Wire, Slits with their rollicking cover of "I to receive honourable mention, the and synth-punk. Yet there are often Grown Ups, or The Vaselines, but Heard It Through the Grapevine.". "fm really glad that it was the 22-year-old UFV student initially times when she will have to refrain don't expect to hear any Oil or Crust shrugged off the honour. from playing some of her other fa- or any of those "awful" kinds of FemCon episode because it really meant a lot to me," she said. "It's re"I remember thinking, 'Oh, cool, vourites in order to maintain the punk. but I wish I had won,"' Williams correct aesthetic.

"When people hear that I host a ally important that girls can get their recalled, "but now that I know how "Because I like my show to be punk show they'll say, 'So you play a music out there, so I was really glad expansive it was fm just like, 'Oh very genre exclusive, I find I can't lot of Anti-Flag?' and I tell them, 'No, that it was that show." wow, that is really awesome."'

CIVL Station Manager Aaron play a lot of pop music that I like," not even one bit,"' she said.

Award or no, Williams is cer- Williams said. "fm really into AusLevy said that he immediately knew As might be expected of any true Williams' FemCon episode was tainly passionate about punk. Her tra and Rich Aucoin and stuff like music aficionado, Williams tracked carefully curated show is a natural that, but it's not really an electronic me down after our interview to add something special.

"When I was listening to it the extension of her fandom and exclu- . show." two essential picks to her list of fasively features music from a narrow A typical Mood Swings episode vourite bands: Husker Dii and the day she aired it for the first time

I was like, 'Bookmark that cause we're going to use it for the NCRA awards in April,"' said Levy.

Although he- downplayed the importance of awards like these in addressing the practical costs of running a community radio station, Levy said the recognition was definitely welcome.

"For us, these awards in particular are about giving us the momentum to fundraise and that's making a difference," Levy said "It's about doing great work, and it's usually expected that you're not going to get anything back."

For Alicia Williams, it's all about sharing her excitement for music with others. "fve been really into music my whole life, even when it's been sort of crappier music, so it's good to have a place to talk about it," she said.

Williams emphasized that CIVL is always looking for more potential hosts to pitch shows and contribute to the station's diverse programming roster.

"My first demo was rejected and I had to come in and re_doit," she revealed. Although volunteers can grow disheartened at this stage, Williams insisted that her experience ultimately made her a better radio host.

Now she has the recognition to prove it.

You can catch new episodes of Mood Swings on Mondays from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. on CIVL 101.7FM or _ streaming online at civl.ca.

Jam in Jubilee 2011: a local festival CHELSEA THORNTONwide range of musical genres, from THECASCADE folk to rock, jazz to pop.

Last year's Jam in Jubilee featured While many UFV students look future CIVL Stage guests Oh No! forward to spring and summer road Yoko, and former Dis-0 performers trips to music festivals on the distant You Say Party! The line-up this year horizon, Abbotsford is preparing to further reflects UFV's growing link launch a musical series of its own, to the Fraser Valley musical commuthe seventh annual Jam in Jubilee, nity: CIVL Radio is presenting the held at the Jubilee Park in Old Ab- concert on July 21. botsford The series will run from My experience of outdoor conJuly 7 to August 11, on Thursday certs in the Fraser Valley in the past evenings from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. Ad- has largely_centered on the big band mission is by donation, and seating or children's music variety - offenis whatever you bring, so don't forget sive to no one, but not necessarily apyour lawn chair or blanket. pealing to everyone. Jam in Jubilee Jam in Jubilee's mission is to "pro- has re-imagined "family-friendly'' mote awareness of Abbotsford's lo- by creating a concert series that goes cal arts community · by providing beyond being universally approprian outdoor performance venue for ate, instead creating an event that musicians and artists to perform and promises to be universally enjoyable, grow." The line up of performers this for kids, teens, adults, and seniors. year truly reflects this goal; the stage ' Jam in Jubilee features more than will host many young Abbotsford music there will also be booths marartists, as well as more established keting the wares of many Fraser Valacts. The performers also represent a ley and Canadian artisans, and for

AMOS EVANS South GeorgieSugarBabe CIVLRADIOHOST J:ustin Townes Earle Amos Evans hosts Psycho Radio, bringing psychobilly, rockabilly, horror punk, deathrock, and outlaw country to CIVL Radio Mondays from 8 to 10, a.m. andp.m

JustinTownes Earle'slyrics are born of deep-rooted pain and vivd honesty about his own shortcomings.

Thissong is an abrupt departure from that, as it is his only song that has an enfu-elyhappy message, along with an irresistible soul beat Thisis the atypical JfE song, and it is all the sweeter for the contrast to the bitterness of the rest of his work.

the first time, the Jam will also host a busking tent. This tent is dedicated to non-musical acts like dancers, jugglers, and magicians, and will stage performances in between the musical features.

The concert on August4 will close with the Jam in Jubilee's foray into another facet of Abbotsford's art life, film making. The event organizers are looking for short films from local filmmakers. The films will be shown on a big screen after t:he sun sets and the musical acts are finished for the evening. The deadline for short film submissions is July 1.

In keeping with the event's local focus, the Jam in Jubilee committee is running a button design contest, asking local artists of all ages to submit their own design. These buttons will be handed out at each concert to the first 200 people who arrive with a two dollar donation. The deadline for button design submissions is June 30.

The complete line-up for the 2011 Jam in Jubilee: July 7th - AbbotsfordEntertainmentCentrepresents: Josh Hyslop (folk rock) Harma White (classic rock)

July 14- BikramYogaAbbotsfordpresents: Casino Jazz Trio (jazz) Jonathan Inc. (acoustic rock} All My Friends (electro synth-pop) July 21 - CIVL Radio101.7fm presents: Teapot Hill (folk) Familia (indie rock) Real Boys (indie rock}

July 28 - I.adyFernLiving Ecologicallypresents: The Hot Moonbeams (pop rock) Sheree Plett & Jeremy Eisenhauer (folk)

August 4 - Atangard Community Projectpresents: Cinnamon Toast Funk (funk) Rags to Radio (pop rock) Local Independent Short Films August 11- Long & McQuadt.;presents: Cale Stanage (folk) The Kodiak Nightlife (pop rock) We Are The City (indie rock)

Old Habits

ChaseDown These Blues

Callof the Wired

The Kings of Nuthin'

J.B. Beverley and the Wayward Drifters

Demented Are Go

Boston's Kings of Nuthin' are the perfect example of what punk rock would have sounded like if it had been invented in the 1940s.

Their unique mix of standup bass, driving piano that harkens back to Jerry Lee Lewis., The vocals retain that street-wise honesty that reminds you this is true rhythm and blues, with a modern twist

Unlike the country music that ·you hear on radio, the sounds of mandolin, fiddle, s~eelguitar, and banjo are right up front, not hidden behind Def Leppard-esque walls of electric guitars. Beverley has a voice that is capable of an outstanding emotional range, and lyrical chops to match greats like Hank Williams.

"Call of the Wired" is a song about surfing outer space while taking hallucinogens, driven by a blues-influenced guitar a la The Rolling Stones that is irresistibly danceable. This is music that you can go mad listening to, or grab a partner and jive to.

12

www.ufvcascade.ca

FRIDAY,JUNE 24th, 2011

NKOTBSB: the art of beating a dead horse SONJA SZLOVICSAK THE CASCADE

As a child of the eighties and nineties, I have become more and more depressed as I see everything that I once loved dragged out until it's unrecognizably terrible. I remember Land Before Time before it was over-sequeled and a !llUSical;I remember the original Power Rangers - not that "Zeo'' or ''Time Force" crap; and I even have fond memories of ·listening to the Backstreet Boys and New Kids on the Block (on a tape deck, not on an iPod).

Ah yes, the Backstreet Boys.

They were one of the few boy bands that became an actual semisuccess at a time when Z95.3 FM's playlist consisted of groups like 98 Degrees, N'Snyc, B4-4, and 0Town. It was almost impossible to tell these groups apart, but Back. street seemed to stand out. Likely, it was because they filled the void left by the New Kids on the Block's very recent break up.

Years passed, New Kids and Backstreet drifted off into anonymity, and that should have been the end of them. Should. It's not.

MclllTYR£ McLEAll KNIGHT DOROUGH KNIIIIIT WAlllBERQ LITTREll WOOD CARTER

.NEW KIDS ONTHE BLOCK .:.BACKSTREET BOYS

So what would prompt these two groups to come together? No, they didn't get the idea from the Power Rangers' Megazord. After the two groups surprised fans with a mash up performance of 'Backstreet's hit "I Want It That Way" together at a New Kids show, they realized that the!r sound and energy meshed well. Since many members . of the two groups aren't actually doing anything career wise (with the exception of New Kids Johna.than Knight, who has a ·successful career as a realtor), they decided to spend the summer touring. Many dates have already sold out, including July 9 in Vancouver. · Their set list consists of various ''hits" from the two bands plus two new singles, "All in My Head" and "Don't Turn Out the Lights."

The new songs aren't anything special, but they certainly make the NKOTBSB album a must buy for all true fans and their kids.

Somehow, this album debuted at number seven on the Billboard Top 200. Obviously, the new songs did the trick. That, and the fact that tape decks are almost impossible to find.

It is hard to take this tour seriously. While big name bands like KISS can still tour successfully in 2011, the fact remains that neither New Kids nor Backstreet were anything more than a foot note in the history of pop music. They played unoriginal songs, performed lame dance moves, and are almost indistinguishable from competing boy bands. At their peak, they were little more than dancing barber-shop quartets with too many members.

Their successes came from the fact that they looked good and were easy to market .

Undoubtedly, the show will be the biggest disappointment Rogers Arena has hosted since the Canucks lost game seven. While the two. groups may have h!id some glimmer of appeal during their prime, the boys are now men.

Puberty and aging make singing and dancing so much harder.· At the end of the super group's encore, most fans will realize they've moved on. Hopefully, these boys move on too.

For more info on the tour, or for proof that I'm not making this crap up, visit www.nkotbsb.com.

.,Sa9ittariua: ~ovember 11 "'2)eeember11 The Moon is in heat with Venus in the house of Mars; all Cancers will be bad for you.

c:,21quariua:dHuar9 10 Jebru.r9 11 Buy a shake-weight. It will improve your love life in manifold unseen ways.

ONE NIGHT - ONE STAGE ONCE INALIFETIME Image: nkonbsb.com

"One Night - One Stage. Once in a Lifetime" is the laughable line plastered on the posters for the New Kids on the Block and Backstreet Boys joint tour. This is despite the fact that they are showing on multiple stages, in multiple cities, and even doing multiple shows in some cities. That's false

advertising if nothing else. No doubt these groups think that by combining forces they will become some sort of super boy band, attracting fans that never grew up and a whole new generation of tween girls.

Yes,it's despicable. And it's coming to Rogers Arena July 9 and 10.

Star signs from ·the Sumas Sibyl SUMASSIBJL HOROSCOPOLOGIST Qemioi: tltJ•I 11 - dune 11

c:,21ries:tlt)arcb 11 - c:,21pril19 Stay away from ostriches. They're watching you.

7.arua: c:,21pril10 - tl1'.J•110 Do not mate with Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, ;Aquarius, or Pisces this week.

Mate only with Oprah.

Your mother is actually the brainpower behind Sarah Palin. This will affect you in some way. Watch out for ice picks and soccer balls.

"Vir90: c:,2lu9uat1J .,September 11 Everything will go well for you if you win the lottery this week.

lt -

C•oeer: duo• 11 - dul9 11 Pray to a different god this week. ..t,eo: ~ul9 1J - c:,2lu9uat11 She's right. You're fat and nobody likes you.

'

'

..[,ibra: .,September October 11 Love yourself in a different way.

Try using theleft hand instead. .,Scorpio: October 1J ~ovember 11 The Matrix is real. This is a glitch.

Drink a red or blue martini; the c~oice is yours.

C•pricoro: .0•eember 11 d•ouar919 Use the stove. Your microwave is about to implode, making all of your future children born with three eyes and no toes.

1Jiaces:Jebruar1 19 tlt)arcb 10 Every night a vampire sneaks into your room. This is not romantic, call the cops.

UFYs-Coup_d Etat: by students, for students '

.

SASHAMOEDT THECASCADE

The brilliant and fresh UFV student group Coup d' Etat competed_ in the Fraser Valley Zone festival this past May. Their production of Dog Sees God was rather successful: Joshua Wilson won Best Emerging Director - Adjudicator's Choice; Haley Smith received an awc).rd for Best Graphic Design; and the group received an award for Best Backstage Cooperation.· The production was cutting edge and smart, a regular coup on Fraser Valley soil.

"The show is about the Charlie Brown kids in high school and it's a pretty racy script, so we knew it would be a hard sell for Chilli- onymous with teenage years, such wack," Dylan Schroeder said in an as suicide, drug use, sex, violence, interview. Schroeder was award- and identity. Schroeder describes ed Best Actor for his role, playing his character as "tormented by the Beethoven. other kids at school because they "Beethoven is my favourite think that he's gay." role that I've ever gotten a chance "It was enormously rewarding to play, so once the shock passed to play a character who is so bitter I was absolutely thrilled to have but then manages to let his walls won," Schroeder said. "I've been down and find love, and eventuacting since elementary school ally stand up to _hisbiggest bully." and took classes in high school, Schroeder was delighted with but I only started doing real shows the show. "We received a standing once I got to UFV." ovation for every performance, Dog Sees God: Confessions of a and there were lots of laughter Teenage Blockhead is a powerful and lots of tears and I could tell play, covering issues that are syn- the audiences really enjoyed it ...

Image: facebook.com

We had such a blast and the people there were all really great towards us. The adjudicator Was tough, but had some great feedback. I wouldn't trade the experience for anything."

Coup d' Etat was formed last fall, in November. It consists of UFV theatre students, mostly those in the upper level classes.

Schroeder himself is entering his fifth year at UFV this coming fall.

The group began working on their first production in January, and Dog Sees God first played at the UFV theatre in Chilliwack a few days before the Zone festival.

"We basically assembled a team of people that we knew could work together and that we could trust," Schroeder explained. "The trust is really important because the play goes in a lot of difficult directions, and you need to be able to count on the people who you're on stage with."

Coup d' Etat was started by Schroeder and three other theatre students: Joshua Wilson, Madison McArthur, and Cait Archer, with the intention of producing thought provoking shows aimed towards a young adult audience. .

"We decided that we wanted the chance to do the kind of shows that don't often get put on in Chilliwack by the theatre department or other community groups. We realized that to do the kinds of work we wanted to do we would have to start our own theatre company and, with Dog Sees God in mind as our first show, we started Coup d' Etat." · Schroeder was pleased· with the UFV theatre ·department's contribution to the success of Coup · d' Etat. The department allowed Coup d' Etat to participate in the Director's Festival and have a run the week after. Access to props and costumes, as well as rehearsal space was arranged.

. "I love the department; it's tli.e people that make it what it is: the faculty and the students. It's a place where·you sort of get to come in to wlio you really are and make lifelong friends, and it's rare to find a place like that."

For now, Coup d' Etai: intends to perform Dog Sees God further, and they are also discussing the option of doing a fundraiser in the fall, perhaps with a new show.

"I couldn't be happier with the group," Schroeder said enthusiastically, ''I'd like to see the word about our group get out there and become a regular fixture of theatre here in the valley. I'd love for us to start taking in enough money to do some bigger budget shows as well."

The initiative shown by Coup d' Etat is encouraging and promising.

Their success brings to light the ability at UFV, as well as a flourishing department that teaches skills effectively and provides the opportunity for students to branch out and explore their talents. As UFV expands and develops, it can be anticipated that more students will show the same initiative and creativity, take advantage of the resources and support provided at UFV, explore their potential, and perhaps instigate their own coups -here in the Fraser Valley.

13

www.ufvcascade.ca

FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

The Cup run that almost was JOEL SMART THECASCADE It wouldn't be fair to call it a failure of a season, after winning the President's trophy and falling just one place short of first in the most grueling postseason imaginable. Yet one can't help but wonder _what could have been and what exactly went wrong with the team just one win away from the ultimate prize. For longtime fans it was like watching the greatest movte with the bitterest of endings. From controversy to injury, the final round didn't go the way anyone hoped, but maybe these are the lessons this group needed to lear~ for another shot next year.

When the Canucks managed to move past all kinds of injuries all year long, it was easy to pretend the injury to Dan Hamhuis was less dire than our initial nightmares suggested. When they managed a 2-0 series lead, though, it seemed like the Canucks had dodged a bullet. But perhaps that was the biggest rea-

Image: thestar.com

son the Canucks began to crumble. Not only did it throw off the team's number one shutdown pairing, it forced a complete rematching of defense pairings from top to bottom. Christian Ehrhoff Was even forced to play on his off-side. When you ac-

count for the loss of Aaron Rome to boot, it's no surprise that things began to go awry.

For a team like Vancouver, a strong defence is everything.

Consider how important it was to have scoring from defencemen in the third round - that valuable

asset entirely dried up in the Finals. The shift left the whole team searching for some cohesion, some chemistry, but it was too late, and the best the team could hope for was one more grinder win - but it just was not to be.

Perhaps the fact that. the rest of the team was also burdened with some pretty serious injuries had to do with that as well.

No one on the team is going to make that excus·e, but the increasingly physical play at the end of a hard-fought season wore the team down to the bone. We made it as close as we could have gotten without winning the Cup, and we paid. every price for it.

Mason Raymond literally broke his back when he put it all on the line.

Those injuries were partly bad luck, of course, but Mike Gillis must have a pretty good idea of what more his team needs if it is going to top it's performance this year. That is, if he can manage to keep the core of the team intact with the impending raises that

many on the team deserve. That isn't to mention the possibility of other teams being better next year, which is a major possibility, especially considering how much of the season Sidney Crosby missed last year.

When looking back at this run in a couple years, I hope what stands out is more than the rioting and the misguided blame cast on Roberto Luongo. The enormous crowds in downtown Vancouver were incredibly wellbehaved win-or-lose for every single game except the last one.

The street parties after game two and six were as unforgettable as the girls in Canucks body paint.

The celebration after defeating the Sharks was also incredible, and if fans would remember, it was Roberto Luongo who made all of that possible with some of the best goaltending this city has ever seen. When looking back at this run in a couple years, I hope fans will remember just how much fun it really was. And who knows, we might not have to wait 17 years for another chance.

Vancouver's UFC 131 exceeds expectations· TREVORFIK THE.CASCADE Other sports could learn from_ a UPC live event

people on their feet for the better part of the evening: roaring with every" hit, swaying to every grapple, and groaning at the more bloody affairs. And the best part?

Nobody felt the urge to set fire to the beautiful city that had hosted the event, the ingredients for an unforgettable evening.

Entering Rogers Arena Saturday afternoon for UFC 131 in Vancouver, the thing that was most apparent was the lengths the UFC had gone to entertain every single fan in the stadium.

Best moment of the night The atmosphere was unlike anything I have experienced at .London, Ontario lightweight a live event. Concerts, football, Sam Stout's knockout victory over hockey - nothing has been able Yves Edwards in the first round. to meet and exceed my expec- To say "hands of stone" lived up tations quite like the UFC live. to his nickname would be an unSeveral screens surrounded the derstatement. It took medical peroutskirts of the arena, assuring sonal a good ten minutes to wake nobody missed a second of the ac- up Edwards before removing tion. Likewise, a ten minute video him from the ring after Stout was· precluded the main card action, · through with him. complete with enough knockouts, submissions, and pump-up music Public enemy number 1: to send the packed house into a Kenny Florian state of near-frenzy. Afterwards, interviews with current heavyMaking his featherweight deweight champion Cain Velasquez but in the co-main event of the concluded a night that had most evening, Kenny Florian had the

appearance of a man who looked like he was being offered a hot meal for a fight, fresh off a stay at the Cobalt hotel. The weight cut to 145 pounds gave Florian the look of someone who was wrestled off the street moments before the fight.

Making mattei:s worse, the Boston-native wore a Bruins jersey to the weigh-in. If he thought that the clever gimmick would get a pass from the hockey-obsessed crowd he was sorely mistaken. From his entrance, to his decision victory, "KenFlo" was berated and booed inside Rogers Arena.

The end of the super-heavy weight?

With Junior Dos Santos's stunning victory over the heavier Shane Carwin, many are claiming the win to be the nail in the coffin of the era of the mammoth heavyweights. Men who have· to cut weight to make the 265 pound limit were seen to be the future

of the heavyweight division, and with the arrival of Brock Lesnar and Shane Carwin to the UFC, the only men worthy of title contention.

When Junior Dos Santos and Cain Velasquez meet this fall, the fight will be one where speed and agility rule. Neither will weigh close to the 265 pound limit, and both will be more then comfortable with the fight going the distance.

Will UPC be back to Vancouver?

With Dana White reluctantly conceding victory to the over.whelming hockey presence in Vancouver, it is difficult to say whether the UFC will return to BC.

The city has not exactly embraced the UFC with open arms, charging an exorbitart amount for insurance, and even going so far as to say that the UFC should pick up the tab for extra policing.

With new markets in Ontario and New York emerging, the UFC has nothing to gain from coming back to Vancouver. While the decreased attendance at UFC 131 could be _ blamed on Brock Lesnar pulling out of the main event weeks earlier, the city's love affair with hockey is the blow that will ultimately kill Vancouver's chance to see UFC return. Several times throughouJ the evening fans broke in chants of "we want the Cup," reminding competitors where they stand in the pecking order of sport favouritism in the city. .

In the end it very well could be Vancouver's obsession with hockey, and the reluctance of a few simple-minded and misinformed city council members, that limits British Columbia's UFC hosting dates to two. If this is indeed the case, I am exuberant to have been a part of the show, even if it was only o~e time.

SPORTS YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF The World Roqk Paper Scissors Championships ALEX WATKINS THECASCADE Do you seek the fame and glory of professional sports but feel more at home handling a doughnut than a football? Are you a failed hand model looking ·for a pastime that showcases the true beauty of your assets? Or, has your extensive collection of locks of celebrity hair left you with a looming debt that you're looking to pay off? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may want to look info the World Rock Paper Scissors (RPS) Championships, an annual competition that brings together the world's best and brightest to compete for $10,000 total prize money, as well as international recognition and a boost in the number and quality of one's romantic partners.

The rules of the game are iden-

tical to those of any casual rock paper scissors match, but they are applied· on a significantly larger scale. This is because the World RPS Championships welcomes over 500 participants from three continents "to determine who is the world champion of the most universal form of hand-to-hand combat in the world." The championships have been held annually since 2002, the last of which was hosted by Toronto's notable Steam Whistle Brewery in 2009; the 2010 championship was cancelled due

to a mourning period for the passing of Wojek Smallsoa - Chairman of the World RPS Society Steering Committee - at age 87. Smallsoa was integral to the RPS Society and had a large hand in its operations. As of now, plans for the 2011 World RPS Championships remain unannounced.

A visit to the World RPS.Society's official website (www.worldrps.com) will almost certainly prove profitable to newcomers, as it offers a brief overlook of not only the basics of the game but

special strategies it claims will allow the reader to beat almost anyone at RPS. But what kind of strategy could possibly be applied to a game that is entirely reliant on chance, you ask?

Well, as the site claims, "Humans, try as they might, are terrible at trying to be random. In fact, often humans in trying to approximate randomness become quite predictable. So knowing that there is always something motivating your opponent's actions, there are a couple of tricks and techniques that you can use to tip the balance ·in your favour."

The site outlines techniques on how to subtly manipulate others into making predictable throws and reveals the patterns that players of varying skill levels tend to follow. Additionally, it claims that in competition play, scissors is statistically the least-thrown move; it is used 29.6 per cent of the time,

which is significantly less than the 33.3 per cent average one would expect from a game with only three possible moves with equal rates of success. With this statistic in mind, the World RPS Society suggests that paper may give par-. ticipants a slight edge whenever they are in a bind and don't know what to do next.

The site also offers a helpful FAQ section, where you can have such burning questions answered as "Why does paper cover rock?" and, "When in an RPS match against a perceived psychic, what is the best strategy to adhere to?"

When the plans for the upcoming championship are finalized, tickets will be made available for purchase online at the World RPS_ website - for competitors, advance tickets sell for $25. RPS groupies will be pleased to learn that spectator only tickets run considerably cheaper at $15 pop.

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FRIDAY, JUNE24th, 2011

www.ufvcascade.ca

Whose riot-was it; anyway?

CHRIS BONSHORtogether people from all across THECASCADE By now, the second Vancouver hockey riot has passed into history as an everlasting symbol of the idiocy of drunken sports fans in our fair part of the world. Despite holding the Olympics last year and everyone coming together beautifully, everything fell apart this year. However, even though there was a riot in Vancouver the last time the Stanley Cup Finals rolled into town, was it a forgone conclusion that it would 'happen again?

I think it was. After all, it happened last time. But let's first consider the specific factors that indicate just how the Stanley Cup Finals are so different from the Olympie's.

First of all, last year we won.

Ever since hockey has become ·a part of the Olympics, Canada has consistently been a top contender and medal winner. In the 40 year history of the Canuck franchise, however, there is a long history of losing. That this was only the second time the team has even gotten to the Finals shows this trend nicely.

Secondly, the Olympics are fundamentally about bringing

the world, and from within each country, in the spirit of polite competition. I qualify c9mpetition in this way simply because those countries that are willing and able to spend more on their national teams do better; there is no level playing field .at the Olympics.

However, with the advent of salary caps, there is the appearance of equality in competition among the various teams in the NHL. In addjtion, these teams are extremely local in focus and appeal and are thus fiercely territorial. Both of these points lend to the far greater degree of competitive spirit that goes into an event like the Stanley Cup Finals.

By far the most important difference, however, is that the Winter Olympics saw the gathering of one of the largest peace tim~ armies in Canadian history, as well as the presence of a large American force just across the border in Bellingham. There is a reason more than a billion dollars was spent on security for the Olympics, and there is a reason there were no riots; it woul'd have been suicide.

So, with these ideas in mind, it is a little clearer why the organizers of this year's event should not have expected it to have the

Image: flickr.com

spirit of camaraderie and jollity of last year's. I mean, letting roughly 100,000 people crowd onto streets in downtown Vancouver to watch the game on the big screens was a disaster in waiting - as time has shown.

However, whose fault is the riot? Is it the fault of the fans? I don't really think so. They were really excited because their team had an.awesome year but then let them down yet again.

Was it the organizers? Maybe.

Letting all of those people drink and watch the game was a really dumb idea. But whose fault is it, in the end? I contend that it is the fault of the NHL for not realizing the factors that I have enumerated and rigging the game accordingly.

For holding the game in Vancouver and allowing the Canucks to lose, the NHL should be held fully accountable for any and all damages to personal property,

injuries to body and reputation, sexual assaults, deaths, and for the black eye given to the city of Vancouver for allowing its citizens to act ridiculous, again. If they had held the game in Boston or rigged the game in the Canucks' favour, it is almost certain that the riot and the damage it caused would have been avoided. Shame on you, NHL! Take a lesson from professional wrestling and rig the games!

We aren't all Canucks KAREN ANEY violence

becomes clear when analyzing the tactical manner of THECASCADE the attacks. For example, the initial point of vandalism was t_he We didn't think it could hapflipped truck in the parking lot of pen again. The riot in 1994 was the post office on Georgia Street. unexpected, terrible, and a black This was the epicentre of the live viewing party, with three screens mark on the city of Vancouver. .Well, it seems that the 17 year within a one square block radius.

Image: flickr.com break }:i.asgiven Vancouver time There were thousands of fans concentrated in this area, and to grow. By all accounts, this hundreds more streaming past time was worse - but why?

Some claim the police were not on their way to Stadium Skytrain station. Before the entirety prepared to deal with it properly, Now Hiring: Sports Editor but as Vancouver Police Chief of these crowds could converge around the burning vehicle, the Jim Chu explained in a stateJob Description: ment, the riot was ceased within hooded individual_s had moved The Sports Editor of th.e Cascade is responsible for assigning, west, leaving destruction in their three hours. Not long compared collecting, editing and laying out the content of the Sports wake. The extent of this destructo the full six hours it took police section of the Cascade. The Sports Editor shall ensure that tion (at the post office, the BMO, forces in '94. However, the damissues relevant to students are presented in his/her section, businesses) age done 17 years ago totalled · and surrounding approximately $I-million dol- was such that masses of. curiand allow the UFV sports community to be represented in ous people congregated in these lars. The damage so far for this his/her section. At all times, the Sports Editor shall adhere riot has not been assessed - but areas, leaving large crowds for to the Cascade Journalism Society's bylaws, Code of Conthe VPD to disperse. This drove to put it in perspective, London duct and other polices, as well as ensuring that all material part of the crowd further west, Drugs alone has estimated their in his/her section does not violate the Canadian University loss to be at $1.3-million. So, bet- and many collected on Granville, Press Code of Ethics. ter police, worse fans? Not ac- while the majority of the police were still attempting to disperse cording to the plethora of Linden Qualifications: jerseys in the crowd. We're a die- the crowds in other areas. By the Must be registered in at least one credit course at UFV durtime they were done, the downhard bunch. town core had a startling and The first thing to note is that ing the fall/ winter semesters. the trouble started before the eerie resemblance to a post-apocMust be available to work varying hours. alyptic horror film. game was done. Would-be rioters · Must be available to be present in the office for at least 5 One question the VPD has wearing hoods, carrying backhours per week during publishing weeks in the fall/ winter refused to answer is why they packs, and sporting bandanas semesters. · were spotted on the streets be- chose to disperse crowds in the Must be able to deal effectively with Society and university fore the third period even end- directions they did. The first row staff, students and the general public. · ed. As Chu explained: "A numof shielded police came south Must demonstrate str.ong command of the English lanon Georgia, beginning just past ber of young men and women guage by passing an editing test, which will be adminisdisguised as Canucks fans ... Homer - towards the businesses were actually criminals and and away from 'industrial detered during the interview process. anarchists. These people came velopment. This pattern seems Basic literacy is required. to have been followed in other equipped with masks, goggles, Must have knowledge of all relevant laws and journalistic and gasoline, even fire extinareas, but why? Chu stated that standards concerning libel. tactical methods were recomguishers which they then used mended by those who study riots / as w~apons." Further, he stated Please email resume and sample sports article (500 to across the world, but this does that many of these individuals 750 words) to nick@ufvcascade.ca ·are known to police, some from not explain why the crowd was driven towards the businesses having taken part in the vandalor at least, why the first wave of ism during the Winter Olympics.

The organized nature of the police pushed in the directioi:i of

the core, rather than away from rich looting opportunities.

While thousands of fans remained downtown, it was a small group inciting the violence. Walking down Granville Street after the worst of the riot had been diffused, this became evident: while police were focusing on directing bystanders away from flaming vehicles and dangerously damaged buildings, some took the opportunity to loot items from stores with windows already broken. One young woma.n, noticing a looter, screamed: "I'm ashamed to live in the same city as you!" This attracted tne attention of a police officer, who proceeded to arrest the young man who was stealing shoes from Sterling on Granville.

There were a number of civilians who ran up and down the streets, brandishing fire extinguishers, putting out burning mannequins and blocking would-be looters from entering broken storefronts.

Perhaps one of the most frustrating parts of the experience downtown was the lack of consistency between officials.

For instance, one officer stated that Dunsmuir was closed from public access because of a fire.

Less than fifteen minutes later, a member of the transit police demanded we take that route to Stadium SkyTrain station. Unilateral knowledge is perhaps impossible, but in today's world with its advanced technologies, it should be possible to keep those in positions of enforcement aware of dangerous areas. If the authorities were more consistently aware of the situations in multiple areas of the downtown core, perhaps some of the damage done that night could have been avoided - hooded anarchists on the loose or not.

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www.ufvcascade.ca

FRIDAY, JUNE 24th, 2011

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