Tanvanga April 2017 Issue 3

TANVANGA

April 2017 Issue 3

I AM WOMAN Photography - Hugo Bello Make-up Artist - Nadine El Kamouni Model – Dalia El Sawy

• What It Takes To Change Heart And Mind • What Grace Lee Would’ve Taught Activists In This Moment • Women Without Children • Shabby Chic Bathroom Décor Ideas • With Rosemary In Her Kitchen

MARCH a month celebrating the woman for all she is – a daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother and everything in between. Yes! She is all that during her lifetime so let’s dedicate her with the International Woman’s Day and the Mother’s Day. Shower her with exclusive gifts, romantic dinners, Mother’s day coupons and whatever. But what respect, her freedom, her safety? In this year into 2017, we started off the New Year with a Bang alright, with mass molestation in a public place in Bengaluru! What did the authorities do about it? Brushed it aside blaming it on “western culture.” Oh you know, the culture where a woman’s clothing and for a woman to be out and having a good time is to invite sexual harassment.... pfft! Outrageous!

Exactly that’s what I said too. And then there is the acid attacks which is so frequently coming up on the news and social media of recently. It’s a horror. The unbearable pain of the acid eating into her skin is beyond my imagination. How can any human being inflict such agony on another! And for what? For some twisted perverted male genderistic sick desires and needs.... that’s not even a word! Come on you male genderistic species give her some respect. Make her feel safe. Give her freedom. Let her fly. It’s about time International Woman’s Day actually meant it. Respect, Safety, Freedom is her right. Life is her right. Our right.

We own it and we live it. LET HER TOO! IN THIS ISSUE OF TANVANGA WE ARE LOOKING ARE AT SOME AMAZING WOMEN. THESE WOMEN SHOULD BE AN INSPIRATION TO ALL OF US. THEY LIVE THEIR LIFE WITH PASSION LOVE AND GRATITUDE.

Signing off as your Editor – In – Chief Happy reading lovely people xoxo

Barefoot Sandals

Source : Pinterest

Colin Beaven (aka No Impact Man) wrote this article for Why Science Can’t Be Silent, the Spring 2017 issue of YES! Magazine. Colin helps people and organizations to live and operate in ways that have a meaningful impact on the world. His most recent book is “How To Be Alive,” and he blogs at ColinBeavan.com.

WHAT IT TAKES TO CHANGE HEARTS AND MINDS To get someone’s support,

Photo by juripozzi / iStock.

Colin Beavan posted Feb 23, 2017

Some years ago, the communications psychologist John Marshall Roberts said at a talk I attended that there are three ways of converting people to a cause: by threat of force, by intellectual argument, and by inspiration.

The most effective of these methods, Roberts said, is aligning communication about your cause with the most deeply-held values and aspirations of your friends, relatives, neighbors, and fellow citizens. To get people’s total, lasting, and unwavering support, in other words, we should try neither to cajole them judgmentally nor convince them forcefully. We should inspire them toward a vision that they—not we—can really care about.

Which points to the potential problem of blindly using facts and science—be it climate science or demographic science—to “prove” the righteousness of our causes. Research shows that people tend to embrace data that support their life views and reject data that refute them.

Whether we like this or not, it is a truth about how humans evaluate and make decisions. Having the “facts on our side” to make an argument more forcefully may not help if those facts and arguments refute someone’s view of life and the values that are precious to them.

The communication challenge, then, is to use our facts and science to skillfully and compellingly connect our causes not to what we think our friends, relatives, and fellow citizens should care about, but what they already do care about.

During the Vietnam War, a dairy farmer told a friend of mine the story of how he got recruited into the anti-war movement. The farmer happened to sit on a plane next to an anti-war activist.

They got talking, and the activist said that he was campaigning against the U.S. use of firebombing.

The cow farmer said, “I know it’s awful, but we surely wouldn’t use that weapon if we didn’t need it to win the war.” The activist told him that crops were being burned and villagers were starving. The dairy farmer felt sympathetic but said the weapons might ultimately bring a faster end to the war. The activist mentioned children getting burned, forests turned to cinder. The farmer felt awful about the suffering, but his view remained unchanged. Finally, in frustration, the activist said, “Even the cattle are dying!” The dairy farmer said, “Wait! What?! They are killing the cows?!”

We may think the cow farmer should have cared about the crops, villagers, children, and forests.

Yet trying to force more information—science and data—about them down his throat might have risked alienating him. Instead, finding his true soft spot—the cows—and being willing to enter into his life view was what eventually recruited him into the anti-war movement.

In another example, when activists with the California-based Leadership Lab knock on voters’ doors in its efforts to defeat anti-LGBTQ prejudice, they don’t start by talking about homophobia—they start by asking what personal experience of prejudice and bigotry the voter has had. Then, Leadership Lab volunteers tell a story of an LGBTQ person experiencing homophobia. They ask a question: “Do you see a connection between the prejudice you experienced and homophobia?” Recognizing that prejudice is the same wherever it is found, many voters are inspired to combat it.

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In converting friends and fellow citizens to our causes, we should not blindly attempt to use facts and science to bolster the arguments and stories that appeal to our own values and experiences. Instead, we are challenged to listen to and understand the people we are trying to convince. Then, we can marshal the facts and figures that prove that our cause can help support their values.

In the case of renewable energy, for example, our friends may care more about national security than climate change. We can tell them about the security advantages of generating energy at home; trying to force them to believe in climate change by explaining the scientific details of the greenhouse effect, on the other hand, may not help. The point is to begin by asking questions in order to understand the values we need to appeal to, and then to use our facts to build a story that inspires the people we are talking to—rather than trying to force our own inspirations on them.

Facts and figures are wonderful tools, but they are not a communications strategy. Let’s not let our convictions blind us to the fact that other people have theirs. We need to hear our audiences’ stories and then retell ours in a way that mirrors their challenges and aspirations. We need to be empathetic and know that our stories are their stories. And that the challenges we face in being human are one.

Producing in-depth, thoughtful journalism for a better world is expensive – but supporting us isn’t. If you value ad-free independent journalism, consider subscribing to YES!today.

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WHAT GRACE LEE BOGGS WOULD’VE TAUGHT ACTIVISTS IN THIS MOMENT Three principles to help you avoid burnout and continue working toward a better world.

At 94, Grace Lee Boggs still taught freedom—speaking, writing prolifically, and conducting seminars at the Boggs Center. YES! photo by Eric Seals.

byMar 20, 2017 Thanks to recent events, many people have felt motivated to march in the streets, call their congressional representatives, or even make protest art. People who have never seen themselves as activists are now feeling the need to do something. Veteran activists are facing the challenge of a renewed effort without suffering burnout. Many of us are feeling a sense of fatigue, after months and months of threats to civil liberties, human rights, and the integrity of our institutions. At such a time, we all need to know how to sustain activism over the long run.

Mindfulness offers a way.

For many of us, mindfulness is more than an individualistic way of reducing stress. As Thich Nhat Hanh teaches, making peace begins within ourselves, but contemplation leads to compassion, and compassion involves taking action to address suffering. This work to transform the world through social, political, economic, or environmental change is activism.

Here are three principles of sustainable activism drawn from the inspirational teachings of Grace Lee Boggs, a lifelong activist until she passed away in 2015 at the age of 100. Boggs spoke of a cultural revolution in which we are transforming how we view ourselves, our surroundings, and

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our institutions. She advocated making a life, not just a living, by feeding ourselves, educating our children, and taking more responsibility for each other and our communities.

1. Come alive Recent research shows how many people are motivated by the pursuit of meaning—and for many of them, activism is the most intensely meaningful work they’ll ever take on. It is awakened by a sense of being called to do the work—and it is sustained by coming alive with the feeling of finding meaning in one’s work.

Boggs teaches that activism means seeing that “we are the leaders” and that we can be the change we want to see in the world. That doesn’t mean we take on the entire burden of change to ourselves; it means that we find a role to play. There are many different forms of activism, and each person can contribute according to their abilities, thinking globally and acting locally.

While there are self-defined or self-styled activists, everyone in their daily practice has both the ability and responsibility to change the way we relate individually and collectively to each other and to our social world. Mindfulness practice enables us to know who we are and what we can do and then to do it.

This can be as simple as mindful breathing, focusing attention on your breath, inhaling and exhaling, especially when you’re feeling particularly stressed or anxious. Nothing will make you more aware of being alive than counting your own breaths!

2. Connect The research to date says that social connection is the single biggest predictor of personal happiness—and activism is nothing without a sense of connection. It is sustained by uniting with others in the struggle, reminding us that we are not alone. Indeed, studies also suggest that our feelings of connection don’t just make us feel good, they make us do good acts.

Connecting with those we perceive as enemies is also crucial. We must resist injustice, and we must resist giving in to the destructive separation of ourselves from others by dividing people as “us” and “them.”

Mindful meditation may enable us to see others clearly and listen deeply, making us aware of our interconnections with all beings. There is a specific kind of meditation called lovingkindness, which can help enhance that sense of connection, including compassion for those we regard as enemies or those who have harmed us.

Connecting also means not abandoning the system, but instead seeing ourselves as part of it.

Boggs reminds us that you cannot change any society unless you take responsibility for it, unless you see yourself as belonging to it, and responsible for changing it.

3. Care Activism springs from caring—and it calls us to widen our circles of compassion to include all creatures and the Earth itself.

That compassion must start with ourselves. Mindful self-compassion is not about letting yourself off the hook. As spiritual activists of many traditions—such as Thomas Merton, Mahatma Gandhi, and the Dalai Lama—have taught, cultivating compassion for ourselves is what allows us to be truly compassionate to others. Indeed, research suggests that mindfulness meditation practices may increase compassionate responses to suffering. That same research provides evidence that compassion also motivates us to take action in the world.

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As psychologist Paul Ekman has argued, anger has a place in activism. But anger is not sustainable; anger burns too hot for a lifetime. Boggs saw tending gardens, caring for the self, and caring for others as nourishing activism. Those acts of care are what will carry us through our most difficult times, as individuals and as a society.

While activism requires courage to act boldly for social change, it also demands acceptance of what we can’t change. We need patience and understanding that it’s a long haul and we’re not the first ones who have tried to change the world. Making a peaceful and just world is not a onetime event, but a sustained process tied to slow evolutionary change. Mindfulness practices can help us to remain present in the moment, engaging in the struggle, and grateful for the opportunity to serve.

This article was originally published by Greater Good. It has been edited for YES! Magazine.

Producing in-depth, thoughtful journalism for a better world is expensive – but supporting us isn’t. If you value ad-free independent journalism, consider subscribing to YES!today.

Stephen Murphy-Shigematsu wrote this article for Greater Good. Stephen is a psychologist at Stanford University in comparative studies in race and ethnicity and cofounder of LifeWorks, a program in mindfulness and transformative learning. He is the author of “When Half Is Whole” (Stanford University Press) and the new book “The Stanford University Mindfulness Classroom” (Kodansha).

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Actress, film director, film producer, scriptwriter hailing all the way from Egypt. All of the above to you to the world. The Dalia El Sawy I know is as below

Photography – Hugo Carlos Bello Model – Dalia El Sawy Make-up – Nadine El Kamouni

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I've had the pleasure of meeting Dalia when she was in Salalah, Oman and also being her friend. Still is! A woman who loves life, to explore it and live it. You put her in a dungeon and she will probably belly dance her way through it. There is no keeping this woman in one place. They say the most beautiful people we know are those who have gone through or faced defeat, struggles, loss and through all this have found their way out of those dark places. Dalia El Sawy is one of those persons I know. One thing that I have learnt from her is that struggles are part of life. No matter how hard life can get be it material, physical or emotional loss, and might even seem like it is the end of the world for you, but know that you are bigger than your struggles and eventually it will pass!

Women Without Children Day

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Make-up – Nadine El Kamouni Model – Dalia El Sawy

Photography – Hugo Carlos Bello

By Dalia El Sawy

Why can people relate to and sympathize with grief and not with struggle? People sympathize with a woman who loses a child, yet they don't know anything about the struggle of a woman who cannot have a child. They sympathize with a person who loses a job, but they don't think much about those who cannot find a job. Is it because humans can feel "pain" and relate to it, yet they can't feel the struggles of others, if they themselves have not been through it? Grief and pain cannot be denied or ignored, but a daily struggle should also be acknowledged.

Women without children live their lives without ever knowing so many joys of life: Pregnancy, preparing a baby's room, shopping for baby clothes, baby shower, delivery, first time to hold the baby, the baby's first smile, first word, first laugh, breastfeeding, carding for a child, birthdays, first day at school, first drawing, mother day celebrations, sport practice, ballet practice, the pride of their achievements, graduation, marriage, successes, problems, unconditional love, hugs, and kisses.

These are just some few moments, that many women would call "the best moments in their lives", which a woman without children would never know.

It is not that simple to live such a life, especially in a world that revolves around children. You face many days feeling lonely, empty, useless, without a purpose and frustrated. The world around you makes you feel incompetent, incomplete and a failure if you are not a "mom". And it is a daily struggle, this is what people need to understand. It is not a "problem" that you can solve, no it is not. And no, it does not get better by time. Let alone that no one talks to you about it, it is like a taboo! Oh, and god forbid if you come across one of those women who would see you as an evil eye for her children.

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Then there is the famous question you hear every time you meet new people "How old are your kids?".

Like it is not an option that you may not have kids.

And let's not forget those good hearted people who try to ease your pain, yet end up hurting you more, when they tell you how lucky you are not having children! From their point of view, you are lucky because you have all the time in the world to do Photography Hugo Carlos Bello

whatever you want.

Model – Dalia El Sawy

Then there is another

Make-up – Nadine El Kamouni

important angle that many people might not know

about. The fears of a woman without children! The future is something women without children don't really look forward to. While women with children look forward to enjoy their old age with their kids and grandchildren, women without children face fears of growing old alone, with no one to look after them, with nothing to do.

I call for a day for "Women without Children" to honor their struggle and pain. To tell them you are not alone. The world feels your pain and admires your strength. A woman without children might be a married woman or a single woman who is struggling to get married. This group deserves to have a day to honor their struggle.

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28 WAYS TO GIVE YOUR BATHROOM A SHABBY CHIC VIBE

BY HOMEBNC ON 2017-03-21BATHROOM, INTERIOR DESIGN

If you love soft, romantic, vintage-inspired decorating styles, you will love this list of shabby chic bathroom ideas. Each of these projects transforms your bathroom from plain to pretty with very little effort. Looking to add just a touch of the vintage vibe to your space? Try one of the shabby chic bathroom designs for a lace, ruffle, or rosette shower or bathtub curtain. It will transform the room instantly! For a larger project, try one of the shabby chic bathrooms that repurposes an old table or dresser into a beautiful sink vanity.

28 Wonderful Shabby Chic Bathroom Décor Ideas You Will Love Storage is so important in bathrooms, which is why these designs has tons of easy storage projects! Wood shelves, baskets, and repurposed armoires all provide pretty and practical storage solutions. When decorating your new bathroom, don’t forget the details! This list has inspiration and projects for pretty décor items like fancy accessories, DIY art pieces, and pretty faux plants that will always look amazing. Many of these shabby chic bathroom decorations feature an elegant chandelier, really putting the “chic” in “shabby chic.”

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1. SHABBY CHIC DRESSING TABLE AND TUB SHELVING Source: casinhacolorida-simone.blogspot.com

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2. WOOD LADDER BASKET BATHROOM STORAGE Source: shellsonthebeach.tumblr.com

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3. WHITE WASHED WOOD SHELVING ORGANIZER Source: etsy.com

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4. PRETTY RUFFLED SHOWER AND SINK CURTAINS Source: heavens163.rssing.com

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5. DIY GLASS CHANDELIER ART WITH RUFFLE Source: notsoshabby-shabbychic.blogspot.com

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6. REPURPOSED SIDEBOARD SINK VANITY WITH STORAGE Source: frenchcountrycottage.net

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7. ANTIQUE BATHROOM TABLE WITH PLANT Source: relisco.com

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8. PRETTY VINTAGE ABOVE-SINK MIRROR FRAME Source: romantikev.com

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9. SHABBY CHIC BATHROOM VANITY WITH LACE FEATURES Source: decoist.com

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10. MOUNTED WIRE BASKET BATHROOM STORAGE Source: trucsetbricolages.com

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11. DIY ECLECTIC MIRROR GALLERY WALL Source: forcreativejuice.com

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12. SHABBY CHIC ROSETTE BATH TUB CURTAIN Source: atlantaonlinemagazine.com

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13. ANTIQUE WINDOW BATHROOM PRIVACY DIVIDER Source: forcreativejuice.com

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14. SHABBY CHIC BATHROOM DÉCOR WITH CLAWFOOT TUB Source: forcreativejuice.com

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15. DRAMATIC LACE BATH TUB PRIVACY CURTAIN Source: eleganthomesshowcase.com

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16. DIY MASON JAR ROSE DECORATIONS Source: chloemaescottage.com

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17. REPURPOSED ANTIQUE TABLE BATHROOM VANITY Source: homemadeinheaven.blogspot.com

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18. TILED BATH TUB NOOK WITH WINDOW Source: centsationalgirl.com

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19. DIY UPCYCLED DRESSER BATHROOM VANITY SOURCE: ROCKMYSTYLE.CO.UK

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20. SHABBY CHIC BATHROOM DESIGN WITH RUFFLE DETAILS SOURCE: SCHWANENTEICH1966.BLOGSPOT.COM

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21. EASY DIY WOOD BATHROOM SHELVES Source: blesserhouse.com

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22. VINTAGE BATHROOM WITH QUILT RACK Source: weheartit.com

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23. PRETTY FLORAL DESIGN BATHROOM ACCESSORIES Source: lovely-decor.com

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24. REPURPOSED TABLE VANITY WITH DUST RUFFLE Source: lantliv.com

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25. LINEN CLOSET WITH ANTIQUE DOORS Source: mrsshabby.com

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26. UPCYCLED ARMOIRE BATHROOM LINEN CLOSET Source: atlantaonlinemagazine.com

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27. FRENCH COUNTRY STYLE BATHROOM VANITY Source: theprettyblog.com

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28. VINTAGE-INSPIRED METAL AND GLASS BATHROOM ACCESSORIES Source: losandes.com.ar

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WITH ROSEMARY IN HER KITCHEN “I am me and try to be all that I can be Living by the Grace of God�

Rosemary Leigh-Houchin

Pepper Steak over Jasmine rice Ingredients 1 lb beef top sirloin (about 1/2-inch thick), trimmed 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon pepper 2 tablespoons vegetable oil 2 bell peppers, seeded, sliced 1 onion, sliced 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped

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1 tablespoon packed brown sugar 3 tablespoons soy sauce 2 teaspoons toasted sesame oil 12 cherry tomatoes, halved 1 1/2 cups hot cooked rice 1 green onion, thinly sliced

Slice beef into thin 2-inch-long strips; place in medium bowl. Add flour, salt and pepper; toss until beef is coated with flour.

Heat wok or 12-inch skillet over medium-high heat.

Add 1 tablespoon of the vegetable oil. Add beef; cook and stir 3 to 4 minutes or until browned. Remove beef from wok. Add remaining tablespoon vegetable oil, the bell peppers and onion; cook and stir 2 to 3 minutes or until vegetables begin to sweat.

Photo credit: Rosemary Leigh-Houchin

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Return beef to wok; add garlic. Cook 2 to 3 minutes, stirring occasionally.

In small bowl, stir together brown sugar, soy sauce and sesame oil until brown sugar is dissolved.

Add sauce and cherry tomatoes to beef and vegetables; stir. Cook 2 to 3 minutes or until sauce is thickened, beef is cooked to desired doneness, and vegetables are tender.

Serve over rice Top with green onion.

Upside Down Baked Potatoes

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Photo credit: Rosemary Leigh-Houchin

Ingredients 3 tablespoons melted butter 3 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese 2 medium potatoes

Directions Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Pour melted margarine in 8x11 baking dish.

Sprinkle Parmesan cheese over melted butter.

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Cut potatoes in half lengthwise and place cut side down over butter/cheese mixture.

Bake for 30-35 mins or till tender.

Cherry Tomato Tulips

Ingredients 15 Large Cherry Tomatoes 16 Green onions 8 oz. cream cheese 1 cucumber 1 teaspoon dried basil Salt and pepper

Directions With stem side down, cut a cross in the top of each cherry tomato (about ž down the tomato).

Using a spoon (grapefruit spoon works very well) to gently scrape out the tomato seeds.

Take a grilling skewer or toothpick and make a hole where the stem currently is. You may need to twist

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the skewer in a circle a few times to make room for the chive to fit through.

Finely chop or grate cucumber.

Mix cream cheese, cucumber and basil in a bowl.

Add salt and pepper to taste.

Add a teaspoon of cream cheese mixture into each tomato tulip (adjust depending on size of tomatoes).

Insert a green onion into the hole at the bottom of each tomato.

Use a damp paper towel to clean any excess cream cheese filling from outside of tomatoes.

Prepare the tulip bouquet on a large plate or platter.

Use the extra green onions to wrap around the tulip stems to complete the bouquet.

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Mason Jars Decorated with Yarn Source – Pinterest

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Photography – Tanvanga Model – Sicily Raju John

DO NOT REPRODUCE CONTENT WITHOUT PERMISSION

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