WOMEN WHO MEAN BUSINESS CALM AMONG THE CHAOS
WORDS OF WISDOM
ASIAN PACIFIC AMERICAN HERITAGE MONTH
14th Anniversary Issue
YOUR HOSPITAL FOR STROKE IS
WHEN A STROKE HAPPENS,
TIME IS NOT ON YOUR SIDE.
Once a stroke begins, there’s no flipping the hourglass. Millions of brain cells die by the minute, speech slurs, muscle control fades and eyesight blurs. How quickly and where you are treated matters. Tallahassee Memorial HealthCare is the only hospital in North Florida designated as a comprehensive stroke center. Learn the signs or see if you are at risk — while you have time.
tallahassee woman | 2 | april • may 2020
H O M E
M O R T G A G E
T E A M
Best Rate. First Time.
(Left to right) Laura Jo Hewitt (NMLS # 775253); Adrienne Granger (NMLS # 451760); Christie Powis (NMLS # 658187); April Brueckheimer Dean (NMLS# 1303118); Sheila B. Rogers (NMLS # 499896) NMLS# 393620
Tallahassee | Crawfordville | Lakeland | TryMyBank.com | (850) 907-2300
10. Letter from the Publisher
Haute Happenings: Highlights of Local Events
12. Letter from the Guest Editor
34. On the Cover
Fashion: Mommy Makeover She Says Social: What’s the Best Piece of Advice Your Mom/Mother Figure Gave You? Home: Adding Personality to Your Interior Nail Trends: Spring Forward With a Splash of Color: 2020 Nail Colors
24. Living Local
WE Elevate: Teresa Howard Around Town: The 2020 Trailblazer Luncheon Sweet Home Tallahassee: Things to do in Tallahassee Community: Asian Pacific American Heritage Month: Honoring Asian and Pacific Islanders Women
Virginia Dailey: Who is Ginny Dailey?
40. Feature Travel
Madam Xhales in the Footsteps of Foremothers
Mental Health Matters: Caregiver Compassion Fatigue? Practicing Mindfulness and Self-Care Mental Health Matters: Calm Among the Chaos Mental Health Matters: Everything That You Do Matters
The Dish: Indian Dishes to Make at Home
Women Who Mean
45. SPECIAL SECTION 46. Women to Watch Highlights of Women in Business Who Walk in Faith Leading: Leadership and Leading Ladies
Elizabeth Ekk WWMB Profiles: Angela Green & Rachelle Denmark,
54. Men Who Mean Business (MWMB)
32. about the cover woman: Virgina Dailey: photography: Kira Derryberry | makeup: Lisa Mergel | clothing and accessories: Dillards tallahassee woman | 4 | april • may 2020
HONORING OUR DONORS
think Sharon “ Iwould be proud.
C L A U D E
W A L K E R
Walker Breast Center Claude, along with family, friends and supporters, has raised $530,000 to support the Walker Breast Center at Tallahassee Memorial HealthCare (TMH). He and his mother, Maye, are the honorary chairs of Golden Gala XXXVII. Proceeds from the Gala, on April 22, 2020, will support the Walker Breast Center.
How did the Walker Breast Center become a reality? Breast Cancer has been in our family a long time. My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 39 and had a mastectomy. She’s now 85 and volunteers as the master gardener in the Tallahassee Memorial Cancer Center’s Healing Garden. My sister, Claire, was first diagnosed with breast cancer at age 42 and had a recurrence at age 51. My late wife, Sharon, was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was just 33 and died in 2005 at the young age of 42. We wanted to do something to honor her, so we started a fund at the TMH Foundation. We’ve carried it on all these years because we know the need is great.
How have you seen cancer treatment at TMH improve over the years? When Sharon was diagnosed with Stage IV Breast Cancer, TMH did not have a dedicated cancer treatment center. We had two young boys, and it was exhausting driving back and forth to Tampa for treatment. Now, people in our region have a place to receive treatment in Tallahassee. We have a phenomenal radiation/oncology team with the best equipment available right here in a dedicated cancer center.
What has it been like to work through the TMH Foundation? They’ve really given me a voice in the process. I’ve met a lot of people who are of the same mind as I am and want to raise money to help move the hospital forward.
What advice do you have for others who want to make a difference? You’ve got to find out what motivates you. What has had an impact in your life? Is it heart disease? Is it diabetes? Is it pediatrics? Figure out what your passion is and then find a way to help.
Your gift to the TMH Foundation will help other families receive the best cancer treatment right here in Tallahassee. Give today at TMH.ORG/Foundation or call 850-431-5931.
WOM A N
April - May 2020 • Volume 15 • Issue 2
PUBLISHER Dr. Michelle Mitcham EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT Punam Bhakta CHIEF DEVELOPMENT OFFICER & SALES Cookie Godfrey PUBLISHING CONSULTANT Kim Rosier CREATIVE DIRECTOR Olivia Heyward INTERNS Kinsley Southworth
CREATIVE CONSULTANT Briana Smith DIRECTOR OF PUBLIC RELATIONS Marcia Warfel DIRECTOR OF LEADERSHIP INITIATIVES Paula DeBoles-Johnson
COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT LIAISON Renée Jean-Charles DIRECTOR OF LUXURY TRAVEL Regina Lynch Hudson ADVERTISING For information on advertising, visit talwoman.com, call (850) 893-9624, or e-mail ads@TalWoman.com.
TALLAHASSEE WOMAN is a publication of Mitcham Media Group LLC Post Office Box 16616 | Tallahassee, FL 32317-3401 Phone (850) 893-9624 | Fax (850) 254-7038 | info@TalWoman.com Tallahassee Woman is published six times per year and is distributed on a complimentary basis throughout Tallahassee and the surrounding communities.
TALWOMAN.COM The information in this publication is presented in good faith. The publisher does not guarantee accuracy or assume responsibility for errors or omissions. Copyright © 2020 Mitcham Media Group LLC. All rights reserved. Reproduction, in part or in whole, without expressed written consent of the Publisher is prohibited.
tallahassee woman | 6 | april • may 2020
LOCAL MEETS GLOBAL
The team, values, and service you know. Now with expanded offerings, trusted worldwide.
Rogers, Gunter, Vaughn Insurance, a HUB International company 1117 Thomasville Road | Tallahassee,FL 32303 | 850-386-1111
Creating a new You ALFREDO A. PAREDES JR., M.D. I LARRY HARPER, M.D., FACS I JEFFREY M. RAWLINGS, MD, FACS LASER | FACIAL REJUVENATION | COSMETIC FACIAL SURGERY | SKIN CARE | COSMETIC AND RECONSTRUCTIVE BREAST SURGERY | BODY CONTOURING | SKINCEUTICALS ADVANCED CLINICAL SPA
tallahassee woman | 7 | april • may 2020
DORRY CHRISTY, ASID WRITER Dorry is an interior design graduate from FSU, and has been a licensed practicing professional in SW Florida for over twenty-five years. Recently relocating back to Tallahassee, she is excited at the prospect of working with local clients, and helping them to achieve something beautiful in their own homes.
MICHELLE UBBEN WRITER Michelle Ubben is an award-winning veteran communicator with twenty years of experience in agency management and fourteen years in seniorlevel government. She is chair of Women United. Mrs. Ubben earned her master's in rhetoric from FSU and a bachelor's in journalism from UCF.
LISA DAVIS WRITER DR. GWENDOLYN Lisa Davis is a wife, SINGELTON mommy of four, beauty WRITER blogger, Freelance Dr. Gwendolyn Singleton Makeup Artist, and is Associate Professor and Owner of Image by Lisa. Director of the Center God made her girly and for Ethnic Psychological she loves sharing her tips Research and Application and tricks with other in the Department of women so that they Psychology at Florida can look and feel their A&M University. Dr. absolute best. For more Singleton received her information about Lisa Ph.D. in Neuropsychology visit imagebylisa.com. from Howard University. She is a nationally certified Mental Health First Aid instructor.
TAVIA RAHKI WRITER Tavia is passionate about cultivating wellness through sustainable and healthful living. Tavia earned her B.S. in Exercise Science from FSU and her M.S. in Neuroscience from USF. She is studying chiropractic medicine and works as a yoga and meditation teacher.
REGINA LYNCHHUDSON WRITER Veteran publicist DR. GENYNE HENRY and luxury lifestyle BOSTON experience-aholic, Regina WRITER Lynch-Hudson, pens Dr. Genyne Henry Boston MadameXhales, slated currently serves as an towards the vintage KIRA DERRYBERRY Associate Provost and of woman that enjoys PHOTOGRAPHER Chief of Staff at Florida more time to travel. Kira Derryberry is a A&M University. As The exacting taste of KINSLEY Tallahassee based portrait MadameXhales finds her SOUTHWORTH photographer specializing a life-long learner and professor, she has also exploring destinations, in families, headshots, WRITER JENNIFER taught for more than cruises, resorts, spas, and boudoir, and commercial Kinsley Southworth is NGUYEN twenty years at various extracurricular activities. photography. She books a senior at Florida State WRITER institutions. She is locally in Tallahassee University studying Jennifer is a business and is available for married to Marcus owner, wife, mother of Editing, Writing, and travel worldwide. View Boston, Jr. and prides Media. She leads worship her portfolio at www. two, and graduate of herself most for being at her church, and is Keiser University. She is kiraderryberry.com. Mom-in-Chief to their also the leader for their the owner of Image Nail three children-- Marcus, College and Young Spa and Salon. Madisen and Makensie. Professionals community group. tallahassee woman | 8 | april • may 2020
DARE. DISCOVER. FLY.
TREE TO TREE ADVENTURES
Zip through tree-tops, soar over cypress swamps, conquer aerial games and obstacles on one of Tallahassee Museum’s Tree to Tree Adventures courses. Explore Tallahassee up to 62 feet off the ground!
T H I S I S T H E BE ST Z I P L I N I N G E X P E R I E N C E OU R F AMI L Y H A S E V E R H AD. " -G RE G " Z I P L I N E S AR E AW E SOME A N D T H E H I ST OR Y AN D AN I MAL S ARE J U S T A SU P E R ADD E D BON U S. RE AL L Y G RE AT P L AC E F OR K I D S (AN D ADU L T S) OF AL L AG E S! " - R A E 3945 MUSEUM DRIVE | (850) 575-8684 TREETOTREEADVENTURES.COM | TALLAHASSEEMUSEUM.ORG
tallahassee woman | 9 | april • may 2020
Accept - then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. -ECKART TOLLE
Dr. Michelle Mitcham
A NEW SEASON: EMBRACING CHANGE - THE ONLY CONSTANT
hange is challenging. Life is beautiful and at times, difficult. As we embrace this reality and acknowledge our power to choose, it becomes our actions that define us in the present moment. When things are going well, it would be ideal to capture that moment and wish that it would last forever. Together, we can overcome any challenge. This is a season of change and uncertainty for us all. As a community we will continue to be strong and support one another. TWM celebrates the 14th anniversary with phenomenal women, stories and resources. On the cover, TWM celebrates an outstanding leader, mother, wife, advocate , volunteer and attorney, Virginia “Ginny” Dailey. Her story of faith and family, along with being intentional, deliberate and solution-focused, will inspire you to action. In this issue, TWM highlights several phenomenal Women Who Mean Business (WWMB) and Women Who Walk in Faith. Their stories will uplift and motivate you. Please continue to email your excellent recommendations for Women to Watch. We must continue to embrace, celebrate and show up for each other. That is what’s so
special about Tallahassee. Community and connection. The annual awards celebration of WWMB has unfortunately been postponed considering our current crisis and the unknown. The most important thing at this time is the safety, wellness and health of you, your family members, those you love and our community. The new date will be posted as soon as it is clear to resume community gatherings. Thank you so much for your continued support and kindness. On behalf of TWM, Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers, grandmothers, stepmothers and those that are like mothers. Being a mother is my greatest honor and accomplishment, learned from my late mother, who was a blessing and sweetheart. I wish you nothing but love and light. Best wishes,
Dr. Michelle Mitcham
tallahassee woman | 10 | april • may 2020
10.30.20 tallahassee woman | 11 | april • may 2020
Georgia“Joy”Bowen GUEST EDITOR
met Ginny as an undergraduate student leader. She was a leader among her peers even then. While I was serving as the Associate Dean of Students in the Division of Student Affairs at FSU, I had the opportunity to get to know Ginny in her capacity as a student government leader. She was professional and courteous and came to every meeting prepared. She was curious and enthusiastic, and a very hard worker. I also got to see her relationship with John as it began and grew; they were a great partnership then and it is wonderful to see that partnership continue. We are blessed to have Ginny as our First Lady. I am especially proud of her work in support of the Children’s Services Council, which I believe will bring new and expanded opportunities for success for all of our children. I look forward to seeing what she will bring in our community.
WE ARE BLESSED TO HAVE GINNY AS OUR FIRST LADY.
Georgia “Joy” Bowen is a Leon County School Board Member, representing District 5 for 22 years since 1998. Mrs. Bowen has a masters degree in education from Florida A&M University. She has been a middle and high school teacher, and a college administrator. She and her husband George have three adult children, five grandchildren, and one greatgrandchild. For more details, see: leonschools.net/Page/4573
tallahassee woman | 12 | april • may 2020
VISIT TALWOMAN.COM TO DOWNLOAD OUR 2020 MEDIA KIT OR EMAIL ADS@TALWOMAN TO ADVERTISE WITH US.
Tallahassee DECEMBER 2018 / JANUARY 2019
Dr. Michelle Mitcham Loving, Learning & Leading
Peace New Year
Greet the New Year With
CHIEF BROWN’S LAWS OF MOTION
Ring in the
MEET Kelly otte
Creating Modern Workspaces
MASTERING YOUR MONEY
Holiday Sweet Dreams
Women's History Month
Family Fun Experiences
Commemorating and encouraging the study, observance and celebration of the vital role of women in American history.
HISPANIC HERITAGE MONTH tallahassee woman | 1 | october • november 2019
tallahassee woman • december 2018 / januar y 2019 1
SHE’S ELECTRIC! SHELLY BELL A Principal with a Purpose
A Mixed-Tape of Everything 80s! Love is (not) a Battlefield Tips on Co-Parenting Pour Some Sugar on Me The Truth About Sugar The Future’s So Bright! The Next Generation Back to the Future–'80s Style Girls Just Want to Have Fun! Haute Happenings
S ISS UE
tallahassee woman • august/september 2016 1
The ot ! H Issue
JUNE / JULY 2018
ON LIFE, LOVE AND MIRACLES
BERRY RECIPES AND LOCAL U-PICK FARMS
IT’S ALL IN THE BAG
Be Healthy in the Heat DOG FRIENDLY BEACHES
tallahassee woman • june / july 2018 1
JUNE/JULY 2019 COMPLIMENTARY
Heidi Otway the
Joy of Renewal
Renew Your View
An Office Makeover
autism awareness that’s
Faves & Raves Style
Regina Lynch Hudson
Luxury Travel & Lifestyle Curator Exhales Women Who Mean Business
The WE Dream Issue
tallahassee woman | 1 | june • july 2019
t a l l a h a s s e e wo m a n
• a p r i l /m ay 2015 1
AUGUST / SEPTEMBER 2018
APRIL / MAY 2018
SUSIE BUSCHTRANSOU THAT’S SO
A BUYING GUIDE
In the Lyme-Light Lyme Disease Defined
BE STORMSCAM SMART!
AND THE SPIRIT OF YOUTH
A SOULFUL STYLE
WOMEN WHO MEAN BUSINESS
The Next Generation
Faves & Raves
Young Women on the Move
GIFT IDEAS FOR MOMS AND GRADS
THE HEALING POWER OF FORGIVENESS
WHICH TYPE OF LEADER ARE YOU?
Talking to Kids About Disasters
tallahassee woman • august / september 2018 1
Annual Holiday Gift Guide
DECEMBER 2017 / JANUARY 2018
Women Who Mean Business SPECIAL SECTION
tallahassee woman • april / may 2018 1
JANE MARKS LESSONS FROM A Women’s History Month THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART Physical and Emotional Health Tips
FEBRUARY / MARCH 2018
Keep Your Money Resolutions
THE JOURNEY (AND JOY) OF SINGLE HOOD
DIY Floral Displays
DIABETES from HURTING to HEALING
IN THE NEW YEAR
tallahassee woman • december 2017 / januar y 2018 1
SELF, HOME & MORE
tallahassee woman • februar y / march 2018 1
APRIL/MAY 2019 COMPLIMENTARY
OC TOBER / NOVEMBER 2018
The Arts & Culture Issue Autumn Greetings! Porch Décor
Teens and Social Media What All Parents Should Know
QUIA Z. MORRIS The Healing Hues of Art
Fall Fashion Fantasy
DECEMBER 2016 / JANUARY 2017
Judge Nina Ashenafi Richardson
Your Thoughts on Beauty
All That Glitters! Fashion and Food
A Taste of Fall Fashion
Get Your Beauty Sleep
DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020
OC TOBER / NOVEMBER 2017
ROLLE JOURNEY OF FAITH
Women Who Mean Business Journal
THE RUNWAY OF A BEAUTIFUL LIFE
Breast Cancer Awareness tallahassee woman • october / november 2018 1
YOUR HIDDEN SUPERPOWER
tallahassee woman • december 2016 / januar y 2017 1
A Message on Breast
Advocacy for Women
Co-Parenting After Divorce
13th Anniversary Issue
Holiday Gift Guide
tallahassee woman | 1 | april • may 2019
tallahassee woman • october/november 2017 1
tallahassee woman | 1 | december 2019 • januar y 2020
The Arts & Culture Issue
OC TOBER/NOVEMBER 2016
New Frontiers in Life and Business
Women Who Mean Business
2016 Women Who Mean Business Award Winners
FEBRUARY / MARCH 2017
The Path of the Heart
A Healthy Heart Is a
SPRING FASHION TRENDS
tallahassee woman • october/november 2016 1
JAMI CHRISTY DALY BRODEUR
Designing a Meaningful Life
SPECIAL FEATURE The Next Generation You Oughta Know
Add Pep to Your Plate
tallahassee woman • februar y / march 2017 1
When the Heat is On
A Life Far Outside of the Ordinary
AUGUST / SEPTEMBER 2017
REAL with the
Formal Fashion Takes Flight!
The Next Generation of Tallahassee Women
LIVING IN THE MOMENT
Elaine Woodward, Mart Hill and Miaisha Mitchell Reflect on the Moments That Matter
TALLAHASSEE WOMAN • D e c e m b e r 2015/J a n ua r y 2016 1
APRIL/MAY 2016 COMPLIMENTARY
TWM Goes Retro! Having a Blast With the Past
Courtney Atkins Shining Bright
Reflecting the Spirit of Leadership
What Women Should Know
Health Benefits CELEBRATING A DECADE OF TALLAHASSEE WOMEN t a l l a h a s s e e wo m a n
• a u g u s t / s e p te m b e r 2012 1
A Passion for Vintage Style Embrace Your Inner Bossy
Life Is Sweet for the Next Generation DIY Drive-In Theatre Retro Thrift Your Home t a l l a h a s s e e wo m a n
• a u g u s t /s e p te m b e r 2014 1
THE SupErHErO ISSuE!! Meet the Six Superhero Winners of the 2015 Women Who Mean Business Awards
Poolside pLuS Fashion Glam
Be a Stargazer
Let’s Go Geocaching!
Be Super Mindful
TALLAHASSEE WOMAN • J u n e /J u l y 2015 1
OC TOBER/NOVEMBER 2015
BRAVE, BOLD, BEAUTIFUL
WOMEN IN ARTS CULTURE
Through Breast Cancer
Holiday Gifts With Artistic Flair
BEST BITES GETS ROYAL
OF STREET ART TALLAHASSEE
Celebrating 14 Years
Thanksgiving DINNER It’s Greek to Me
TALLAHASSEE W OMAN • O c tO b e r /N Ove m b e r 2015 1
• D e c e m b e r 2014/J a n u a r y 2015 1
APRIL / MAY 2017
The Journey of a Butterfly
Sharing the Gift of Life
A Blue & White Easter
Garden Grilling 101
staY Fit trends t a l l a h a s s e e wo m a n
WHO SAYS A GIRL CAN’T GRILL?
THE FUTURE LOOKS
Defy Your Age
the meaning of friendship
I’ll Be There for You…
Turn Your Winter Blues to Winter Wonder
Annual holiday Gift Guide
DECEMBER 2015/JANUARY 2016
DECEMbER 2014 / JANuARY 2015
From Around the World
Look Cool & Fresh
tallahassee woman • june / july 2017 1
tallahassee woman • august/september 2017 1
Sizzlin' Summer Swimsuit Styles
tallahassee woman • june/july 2016 1
Modern Renaissance Woman
TRAVEL TIPS | GET “REEL” | SUMMER ENTERTAINING | STAY COOL LOOKS
HAUTE HAPPENINGS AROUND TOWN
are going places
YOUR SUMMER PASSPORT
Laugh Your Way
to Better Relationships
tallahassee woman • april / may 2017 1
MAKEOVER • SOCIAL • HOME • NAIL TRENDS
BY LISA DAVIS
otherhood: arguably the toughest job on the planet. As moms, we naturally put everyone else’s needs above our own, and sometimes self-care takes a back seat. Before we know it, we’re asking “What happened to me?” This revelation was real for Allie Blankenship, the recipient of 2019’s Tallahassee Total Mommy Makeover. Allie is a single mom of two girls ages 5 and 10. Having always wanted to give the gift of motherhood to others, Allie had recently given birth through a surrogacy program. After recovering from the delivery, navigating a divorce, and realizing another birthday was on the way, Allie decided to start reclaiming her confidence, and applied for the makeover. “The Total Mommy Makeover renewed my confidence in much more than my appearance. It helped me feel like myself again.” The Tallahassee Total Mommy Makeover was developed by Lisa Davis, our Image Contributor, professional makeup artist and mom of four. The program partners with local women-owned businesses who donate their time and resources to make a difference. If you know a deserving mom, nominate her for 2020’s Total Mommy Makeover by sharing her story at firstname.lastname@example.org. For more information and past stories visit imagebylisa.com/totalmommymakeover TREATMENTS DONATED:
Before and after photos by Elizabeth Birdwell Photography. Hair by Kandie Claiborne. Makeup by Image By Lisa. Teeth whitening by Tallahassee Smile Labs. Tanning by Myste Me Tanning. Facials and brows by Adair Skincare. Training and nutrition by Jenn Powell Fit. Nails by Image Spa Tallahassee. Styling and celebratory event by Fab’rik Tallahassee. Botox by Allure Laser tallahassee woman | 16 | april • may 2020
A F T ER tallahassee woman | 17 | april • may 2020
Trends | she says social
“Everyone puts on their pants just like you, one leg at a time, so don’t let anyone intimidate you,” helps me level any playing field. -Stephanie Shumate
What's the best piece of advice your mom/mother figure gave you?
Educate yourself so that you can always take care of yourself. -Paula DeBoles-Johnson
She Says Social
MOM: If a man tells you that a green wall is purple—tell him he is right. ME: If a man tells me a green wall is purple—I’ll send him to the paint store to get a can of paint, so he can paint the wall purple.
My mom always said to “take care of you first... because when mom isn’t feeling well, everything else fails.” -Hue Reynolds
What people think about you is none of your business. What does God think about you? -Quia Z. Atkinson
Be a parent not a friend, your children have many friends but only two parents!
Live a life with no regrets!
Pray, prepare, persevere. -Elizabeth Emmanuel
Your kids don't Kill ‘em with kindness! need a perfect -Bobbie Rushing mom. They need a Do not let happy mom. -Elvira Jones Hanson
You can do anything you put your mind to. -Kristie Kennedy Ward
your passion cloud your judgement.
-Kristin J. Korinko
“KINDNESS IS A VIRTUE. -Mary Sweet
tallahassee woman | 18 | april • may 2020
DO YOU HAVE A STORY TO TELL? LET'S DESIGN YOUR NEW BOOK.. Book Cover Design | Interior Layout Design | Author Website Self Publishing Guidance | Marketing Materials
Email Us at: email@example.com
TALLAHASSEE’S FIRST CHOICE IN SENIOR LIVING Enjoy active senior living with a variety of affordable apartments and single-family homes, plus the security of additional support like assisted living and nursing care, all on one campus.
For more information call (850) 878-1136.
www.WestminsterOaksFL.org 4449 Meandering Way Tallahassee, FL
The Magazine for women by women about women. TO ADVERTISE WITH TALLAHASSEE WOMAN MAGAZINE EMAIL ADS@TALWOMAN.COM
tallahassee woman | 19 | april • may 2020
Trends | home
PersonalityTO YOUR INTERIOR
ccessories give your home personality, and are many times called "the icing on the cake"! Wallking into a home and feeling like it's interior is beautiful and polished is a joy. I would love to help you achieve that in your own home, and help you create a finished interior that any designer would be proud to call their own.
Take a good hard look at your room. Are there things you have that you can easily do without, or maybe don't even like that much? I always ask my clients to take everything away, and then place them into groups. The first group would be things you know you love, that may have sentimental value, and you just can't part with. The second group would be things that you like, which are pleasing to the eye, and you The following would want to work them into are a few tips your interior if possible. The and guidelines third group would be items that have gotten tired-looking, that I have used in don't work with your current designing for style, and are ready to be given clients through away. the years and in Then, think about the scale my own homes. of the items left that you want to use. Try to place items of One of the most important things varying scale together to give in getting started is to de-clutter. more interest and variety. A
tallahassee woman | 20 | april • may 2020
BY DORRY CHRISTY, ASID
round ceramic vase, for instance, could look nice placed next to a pair of taller candlesticks. Boxes of all sizes and shapes can be a good choice as well. They can be found in a large variety of materials, and can serve as a great place for hiding those remotes. It is also great to add texture to your interior. I love adding a soft throw or a few pillows on a sofa or chair. Select your fabrics carefully. They should all complement each other and work well together. We all want to show off our accessories, and the best way to do that is to group similar items together. You can make a bigger impact if you have a group of three or more. As an example, to showcase family photographs, have a dedicated table top for
smaller framed photos, or select a dedicated wall in your room for the larger framed photos. The frames do not have to match, and as you can see in one of the pictures shown here, the photos can be hung ceiling to floor, allowing you to add more to your wall as your family grows.
If you have a collection you would like to showcase, set aside a specific place to display them such as a curio cabinet, special shelving, or a dedicated table top. All of the similar items you have collected should be shown together. Of course there are always exceptions, because every interior is as unique as we all are! I hope this has provided you with some helpful ideas on allowing your accessories to become the star of your interior. By choosing accessories that reflect your taste and your interior's style, your home will be unique and individual to you. They give a nod to your own personality, flair and style. Your guests will find that your accessories are a great conversation starter too. Sit back, relax, enjoy the beauty you have created, and start entertaining your friends and family!
I would be happy to answer any of your design questions. Feel free to contact me at: firstname.lastname@example.org Thanks for reading!
Need coaching or counseling? Teletherapy with Dr. Michelle Mitcham, LMHC of Courageous Conversations as seen on www.PsychologyToday.com Online counseling and coaching via audio or video messaging from anywhere. Flexible plans to meet your scheduling needs and lifestyle. Confidential and Secure. Discounted rates available.
CALL FOR FREE PHONE CONSULTATION - (850) 888-8945
tallahassee woman | 21 | april • may 2020
Trends | nail trends
WITH A SPLASH OF COLOR: 2020 NAIL COLORS
hat is the best nail color for you? There is no better feeling than a fresh manicure with the perfect color that become a new accessory to your outfit. Whether you decide to be inspired, bold, creative, experimental, or even retro. Kicking off the new decade, there are many new and exciting nail trends in 2020. Try something new and exciting!
jewel, and matte are all trending. With incessant possibilities, one nail trend that will never go out of style would be the pastel nails. Choosing from pink, lavender, mint, blue or yellow for a cute, but stylishly wear for any day of the week. Pastel colors can be worn in many different ways. Choose to sport a solid color, maybe a gradient ombre, or a pastel rainbow of different colors on each nail. You name it, from For that creative or animal prints, marble, daring personality, gingham, pearl, why not try different graphic, geometric, shades of the same metallic, galaxy, color? The sky is the tallahassee woman | 22â&#x20AC;&#x201A;| april â&#x20AC;˘ may 2020
BY JENNIFER NGUYEN
limit to express your individual style and personality! Feeling adventurous and need an alternative to your everyday French? Well, 2020 brings us another twist of the old classic French manicure. Choices range from ombre, color tip, color block, double tip, and of course pastel French. Are you tired of French and want a new look, just as elegant? Here is a selection of the most popular alternative colors that are not the latest but are
definitely classy and trendy. They will surely complement your everyday and special occasion needs with the same touch of elegance for discriminating tastes. Funny Bunny by OPI, is a soft white that is irresistibly sweet. Lisbon Wants Moor is a gorgeous delicate pink that is almost white. Don’t Bossa Nova Me Around is the perfect color if you cannot decide between pink or gray it is a winning combination of both. Bubble Bath is the perfect shade for all skin tones and all occasions, from everyday casual, work or even a wedding. It is the ideal natural sweet candy pink that is both very pale and sheer. An essential natural pink is the Fancy Princess, along with a light pinkish lavender contrast called Soft Feather. Last but not least, is the American Manicure. The American manicure is a unique natural look that is making a great comeback. Choosing the perfect nail color may be daunting, but never hesitate on the classic French, red, or the baby pink color when getting a manicure. Just remember they will always remain a classic.
1410 Market Street | Tallahassee 850.224.2924
Locally owned and operated since 1985
tallahassee woman | 23 | april • may 2020
Largest Selection of In-stock Decorator Fabrics in Tallahassee
Local LIVING Living LOCAL
WE ELEVATE • AROUND TOWN • SWEET HOME TALLAHASEE • COMMUNITY • HAUTE HAPPENINGS
WE Elevat e
TERESA HOWARD What was your pathway to this leadership role?
I began my career at the Leon County Sheriff’s Office in January 2001, as a part-time employee. At the time I was also a full-time student at TCC and also working as a waitress. In October 2001, I became a full-time employee working as an Evidence Tech in the Crime Scene Unit. While in this position I was utilized by the deputies and detectives to assist with interviewing witnesses, victims and suspects. I was one of the few bi-lingual employees and was able to assist speaking with persons in Spanish. In May 2004, I had graduated with my BS in Business Administration from Flagler College, but continued to work at LCSO in my position. During my time at LCSO, I realized that I wanted to do more to
help the Hispanic Community and be there during the crisis and not helping after the fact. In May 2007, I graduated from the Pat Thomas Law Enforcement Academy and in Feb. 2008 I became a full-time deputy. I was the agency’s first Hispanic female deputy at LCSO. I have worked hard and worked in various units before becoming promoted to Sergeant in June 2016. I am currently the Sergeant over the Community and Media Relations Unit.
How would you describe the most fulfilling part of your job?
tallahassee woman | 24 | april • may 2020
The most fulfilling part of my job is being able to help others. When I was a detective in the Violent Crimes Unit I, which was the first INVEST (Intimate Violence Enhanced Services Team), I helped victims of violence. One victim contacted me years later after I worker her case and she told me I saved her life. She was initially reluctant to pursue charges against the perpetrator, but I earned her trust and she followed through, and ultimately he was placed in jail. She was able to move away and start a new life, which I will never forget – it motivates me to continue helping others. A key component that is extremely fulfilling to me is the ability to bridge the gap between the Hispanic community and law enforcement. When I started my position in the CMRU, I noticed that there were a lot of resources available to the community, however, I did not see many Hispanics attending the events. I approached Sheriff McNeil about having the LCSO host a Hispanic Resource Festival. With his support October 2018, I started the first Annual Hispanic Resource Festival which included over 20 community partners, LCSO specialty teams and Hispanic entertainment and food. The following year, LCSO partnered with TCC
to host the Second Annual Hispanic Resource Festival. Through the festival we displayed LCSO’s specialty teams including deputies interacting with a community, that typically would not interact with law enforcement. I hope to bridge the gap and build trust between the community and law enforcement.
Have you experienced any challenges along the way? My profession is a male dominated profession and can be difficult to earn my co-workers respect. When I was promoted I know there were some who may have thought that I was only promoted because I was a minority female, but I am confident that I have worked hard to achieve where I am today. It can be difficult because others can view my small stature and wonder how I can control a scene or deal with a difficult situation. Luckily for me I have not had to face these challenges. I treat everyone I encounter with respect, which helps control the situation.
What matters most to you?
My family is what matters most to me. They are my motivation to continue doing what I am doing.
our grandparents. We were also both molested by our great-grandfather. Through it all, we prevailed. These are some of the reasons that motivate me to help others.
What are your core values?
Dependability, accountability, honesty, commitment and determination.
What does it mean to you to be successful? Success is not based off of what other can see, but to be successful means I have the love and respect of those around me.
What advice do you have for your girls, teens, young women? I would tell them “Don’t let others expectations of you become your reality.” Also, I would tell them to stay strong and never let anyone tell you that you can’t do something.
What is your inspiration? I am inspired by proving others wrong. Many do not know my background or my story but those that do know that my life should have taken a very different turn but I was able to prove them wrong. I
prevailed in spite of my situation.
Who have been or who are the most influential women in your life?
My mother is one of the most influential women in my life. Although she had a rough time and was not the best mother growing up she has fought through it. She is now a recovering addict but I know that she struggles with that battle daily. I know that she does and did the best that she can.
What do you do for fun or self-care? Maintain balance in your life?
This one is a difficult one but I spend my free time with my family. I have a 14-year-old son and now in the process of adopting my 17-monthold niece. I also have a huge support system with my boyfriend, his mother and sister, as well as my mother and sister. I guess for self-care I try to make time to go to the gym but that can be difficult at times. But when I leave the Sheriff’s Office I try to leave it at the office and when I’m home I am not a deputy or Sergeant, I’m mom and girlfriend.
What is your inner voice or heart telling you?
To always be a blessing to others. The lord has blessed me over my life and I truly believe that if it wasn’t for him I would not be where I am. As a child I never saw myself living beyond eighteen years old. I grew up in poverty with an alcoholic father, and a drug addicted mother. My sister and I were basically raised by
missygunnelsflowers.com tallahassee woman | 25 | april • may 2020
The 2020 Trailblazer Luncheon
ach year, The Oasis Center for Women & Girls honors those in the community who make extraordinary contributions to Tallahassee and beyond. The 2020 Trailblazer Luncheon was a vibrant celebration of the women and girls in the community, highlighting leadership feats in education, public safety, sustainable technology, human rights, and entrepreneurship. Held on Friday, February 28th at St. John's Episcopal Church Lively Cafe, the event featured Judge Nina AshenafiRichardson as guest speaker, and WCTV Anchor Abby Walton as master of ceremonies. Honorees Cherry Hall Alexander, FSU Chief of Police Terri Brown, Michele Madison, LuMarie Polivka-West, Madeline Feiock, and sisters Lyrica, Zaira, and Nadira Leo received awards. The crowd also had the opportunity to experience the talent of singer/songwriter Rachel Hillman at the event. Attendees included State Representatives Ramon Alexander and Loranne Ausley, FSU President John Thrasher, and County Commissioners Kristin Dozier and Curtis Richardson. tallahassee woman | 26 | april • may 2020
ADSTally.com tallahassee woman | 27 | april • may 2020
Living Local | sweet home tallahasee
THINGS TO DO IN BY MICHELLE UBBEN
o many, Tallahassee can feel just as welcoming as a cold glass of sweet tea on a wide front porch. But if you’re new to town, it may take awhile to break in, find your place and feel like part of the community. If that’s where you find yourself, don’t fret – there are ways to speed the process of becoming a true Tallahassee lassie. While recovering from a move can leave you housebound, spending hours unpacking boxes and decorating your new digs, the sooner you get out and make connections, the better. Think of it as concentric circles of connection. First is your neighbors. There’s no better time than now to make the rounds and introduce yourself to the people closest to you. Consider hosting a simple meet and greet, inviting your immediate neighbors in for a chance to get to know you and find common ground. In the digital world, joining your neighborhood’s Facebook page and Nextdoor community is a great way to ask questions, seek out recommendations, and make helpful connections. Then, there are specific social media interest groups, like Tallahassee Foodies or Tallahassee Mountain Biking, which can link you with other people who share your passion for good food, off-road rides – or anything else. And platforms like Meetup.com can help you find groups and events near you that offer trail walks, a chance to practice your Spanish, or learn belly dancing.
Next, take your interests offline and seek out groups dedicated to your hobbies or other pursuits. You can find a group for just about every interest here – Gulf Winds Track Club for runners, St. Francis Wildlife Association if you’d like to help injured critters, or the Tallahassee Film Society for indy movie buffs, just to name a few. Attending some of Tallahassee’s diverse event offerings – from Opening Nights performances to the Greek Food Festival – will give you a chance to sample the variety of what the community has to offer and rub shoulders with those who enjoy similar things. Tallahassee also has a large and diverse faith community, which provides opportunities to form relationships and volunteer in many meaningful ways. And speaking of volunteering, there is probably no better way to form real bonds of friendship than to roll up your sleeves and serve with others in pursuit of a worthwhile cause. Women United, the group of powerhouse women who help support United Way of the Big Bend’s mission to combat poverty in our community, is a great place to start. Work with other interesting women to stage Dress Down & Dine – which brings women together to graze, sip and shop – and the Women’s Leadership Breakfast, which attracts top speakers to elevate and inspire Tallahassee women. The possibilities are endless – and they await just outside your door.
tallahassee woman | 28 | april • may 2020
Shop Small! The Florida Retail Federation encourages you to SHOP LOCAL retail!
Everything you need, at your fingertips. Welcome to The Grove at Canopy. Our Independent Living, Assisted Living, and Memory Care lifestyles provide just the right amount of care, attention, and luxury. Gourmet food, tailored fitness programs, and a full range of engaging programs and friends can make any life feel vital and exciting. No matter what you or your loved ones need, you’ll find it at The Grove at Canopy. • Our Independent Living community provides the utmost luxury and resort-style amenities you’ve been looking for. • Our Assisted Living lifestyle can preserve dignity while providing just the right amount of care. • If your loved ones need more care for dementia-related illness, we offer love and attention in our safe Memory Care environment.
ALZHEIMER’S & DEMENTIA SUPPORT GROUP
Recognize the signs of dementia vs. natural aging Support group led by Memory Care Director Sameka Green Wednesday, April 16th from 6:00-7:00 pm
2601 Crestline Rd. Tallahassee, FL Assisted Living Facility #13331
Independent Living, Assisted Living & Memory Care tallahassee woman | 29 | april • may 2020
Living Local | community
A S I AN PACI FI C A M E RI C A N
HERITAGE MONTH HONORING ASIAN AND PACIFIC ISLANDERS WOMEN
Portia Dinoso Campos, PH.D., MPA Portia Diñoso Campos is an assistant teaching professor and internship coordinator at the Askew School of Public Administration and Policy at Florida State University. Dr. Campos is dedicated to teaching and sees the classroom setting as an incubator of democracy where students can express themselves as both concerned citizens and passionate public servants and to exercise opportunities and ideas that would help to better society. Dr. Campos is a member of the Airport Advisory Committee; President , North Florida Chapter of the American Society for Public Administration; member, Big Bend Filipino American Association (BBFAA). She is a devoted wife and daughter and enjoys photography, videography, photo and video editing, desktop publishing and layout, vocal performance, and traveling.
Yuh-Mei Hutt Yuh-Mei Hutt is a Tallahassee native. Her parents emigrated from Taiwan and starting a business. Yuh-Mei took over the family business after earning a degree from Berkely. It is no wonder that her early background led her to continued success and is the president of Golden Lighting. Under YuhMei's leadership, the business has grown ten times from where where it began. Mrs. Hutt is actively involved in Tallahassee’s entrepreneurial ecosystem by promoting startups, angel investment, and exponential mindset. Last year, Yuh-Mei became chairwoman of the board of directors at Domi Station. She loves Domi’s mission of helping entrepreneurs start and grow their businesses. She has a desire to create a community that future generations will want to stay in and build their dreams. She loves Tallahassee and wants to contribute to its growth by building a vibrant entrepreneurial community.
Jennifer Nguyen Jennifer Nguyen, business owner, wife, mother of two and graduate of Keiser University. Jennifer is the owner of Image Nail Spa and Salon. With over 20 years of experience, she loves keeping all her clients relaxed, recharged and glowing. Born in Vietnam and raised in upstate New York, she moved to Tallahassee after she was married in 200. In her spare time, she enjoys spending making authentic Vietnamese cuisine with her family. Jennifer is passionate about her culture and heritage and strives to instill in her children the core value of her culture and traditions, while also embracing diversity and the American culture. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In our fast pace melting pot society as we are chasing or living the American dream, I truly believe in the importance of not forgetting our roots and our ancestry. While we are embracing our culture and heritage, we should always be culturally competent of the diversity that make all of us an American.â&#x20AC;?
Christine Poole, CMP Christine Poole, CMP has had a career in the meetings and event industry for over 20 years. She has worked with Florida state associations such as the Florida Psychiatric Society, Florida Sheriffs Association and not-for-profits such as ExcelinEd, Inc. As a Global Project Manager with Conference Direct, an international meetings management firm, Christine works with clients whose events host up to over 1500 attendees. Her goal is to not just manage, but to help organizations create and implement policies and procedures which will aid their events to be more turnkey, streamlined, cost effective and profitable.Christine is a proud Florida State University Seminole with a bachelorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in social sciences. She earned her Certified Meeting Professional (CMP) designation from the Events Industry Council. Free time is enjoyed with family and friends at home or the beach. She is married to Eric and is mother to two children: Evan and Graysen, and Ronin, the family pup.
JAMEY JOHNSON CONCERT April 3, 2020 6 PM Capital City Amphitheater
Eleven-time Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter, Jamey Johnson, will be performing at the Capital City Amphitheater on Friday, April 3, headlining and kicking off the 6th annual Word of South Festival weekend. Johnson is a platinum-selling artist and is one of the few people in the history of country music to win two Song of the Year Awards from both the CMA and ACMs. For more information and tickets, visit capitalcityamphitheater.com
MARIE ANTOINETTE April 3-11, 2020 FSU Theatre Lab
Marie Antoinette once delighted her subjects with three-foot-tall wigs and an extravagant wardrobe. When France teeters on the brink of revolution, she is shocked to find them conspiring against her. As she ponders what went wrong, Marie is forced to deal with what lies behind the façade. Eighteenth-century extravagance meets contemporary culture in this hilarious reimagining that might cost someone their head. For more information and tickets, visit tickets.fsu.edu
BEHIND THE SCENES FEEDING TOUR April 11, 2020 4 PM Tallahassee Museum
Have you ever wanted to know more about the wildlife at the Museum? Explore the diverse diets of our bears, river otters, panther and cougars. This program will allow guests to go behind the scenes with one of the museum’s animal keepers who will walk you through the feeding process of these three
species. Guest will get to go into the animal kitchen and watch the animals explore their nightly enrichment made by the Animal Department. Registration Deadline: Wednesday, April 8th, 2020 at 12:00 p.m. Must be at least 9 years old to participate. All participants under 16 must be accompanied by an adult.
2020 FLORIDA STATE SPRING GAME April 18, 2020 5 PM Doak S. Campbell Stadium
On April 18th, Coach Norvell will have his first game as head coach of Florida State, followed by our annual Doak After Dark Concert for game attendees. Make sure to come out and attend this event for all you diehard Noles!
2020 CHAIN OF PARKS ART FESTIVAL April 18 - 19, 2020 Downtown Tallahassee
The Chain of Parks Art Festival is one of North Florida’s premier cultural events, and has been nationally ranked five years in a row! Proceeds from souvenir sales and sponsorships of the festival benefit LeMoyne’s education programs. The festival provides a beautiful venue for artists from across the country to showcase their work and the opportunity for individuals to purchase quality art. Over 160 artists selling original fine art work, A Loft Bar, food trucks & vendors, live music, kids crafts & activities! Free admission to festival and concert!
SCIENCE NIGHT AT THE LIBRARY 2019/2020 SEASON
April 23, 2020 6:30 PM LeRoy Collins Leon County Public Library
Join us for a FREE, fun, and familyfriendly hands-on science event for all ages (but especially for those aged 6-12). Theme: Famous scientists and their discoveries Plan for the activity to last about 30-45 minutes, but the scientists will stick around longer to answer questions and library staff will be on-site to help recommend books that complement the science. For more information and tickets, visit nationalmaglab.org
TOPGOLF LIVE AT DOAK April 23-26, 2020 Doak S. Campbell Stadium
Topgolf Live is bringing the Topgolf experience to Doak Campbell Stadium for a limited time. From April 23rd-26th, experience a golf game unlike any you've ever played with giant targets on the field, Toptracer technology, and spacious hitting bays. For groups of 12+ wanting to upgrade their night, our VIP experience can include a private bar, ballpark fare-style food, and premium space to enjoy in between tee times. Email live. email@example.com for more information on group reservations.
THE AFRICAN CHILDREN’S CHOIR IN CONCERT
April 24, 2020 7 PM Good Samaritan United Methodist Join the African Children’s Choir as they perform in your community during their North American Tour. Come and experience a uniquely immersive performance that shows the beauty, dignity and potential of each child! Admission is free for all ages; a free-will offering will follow the Choir’s concert. Don’t miss out on this uniquely
immersive worship experience through song, dance, and video story-telling!
POPS IN THE PARK
April 26, 2020 7:30 PM Southwood Central Park The TSO Pops in the Park is a springtime tradition of outdoor music overlooking Southwood’s Central Park Lake. There is no better way to celebrate the arrival of Tallahassee’s glorious spring than by gazing skyward into a clear night while our orchestra serenades you from the stage. Southwood’s beautiful Central Park Lake forms a fantastic setting for the spectacular sounds of the Symphony. Children can play on the lawn while parents enjoy picnic dinners brought from home or purchased on site. For more information and tickets, visit tallahasseesymphonyorchestra. secure.force.com
FREE SHAKESPEARE IN THE PARK FESTIVAL EVENT (TWELFTH NIGHT) May 7-10, 2020 6 PM Cascades Park
Mistaken identities, cross-dressing, and love-triangles: These are just a few of our favorite things as we turn up the laughs with William Shakespeare's Twelfth Night, directed by James Alexander Bond, during our Free Shakespeare in the Park Festival Event. Food, fun, and frolic abounds during this four-day Festival event in Tallahassee, Florida. For more information and tickets, visit southernshakespearefestival.org
May 9, 2020 7 PM Tallahassee Museum The Tallahassee Museum invites you to enter the world of our nighttime animals. Enjoy a tour of night life at the Tallahassee Museum as your guide points out many of our nocturnal animals who call the museum home. You will also have an opportunity to get close to one special night creature! *Please note that this is an outdoor program. Tickets must be purchased in advance through our website, registration deadline is May 6th at 12:00 pm.
2ND ANNUAL CAPITAL CRAFT FEST
May 9, 2020 Tallahassee Automobile Museum Capital Craft Fest will be back for the 2nd annual event this spring, and you do not want to miss it! They will be back at the Tallahassee Automobile Museum from 10am to 4pm. Amazing & Talented local vendors displaying their art, crafts & handmade items. Boutiques, Direct Sales reps & More! Grab a bite to eat from the Food Trucks on site, will be activities for the kids, Live Music & Entertainment! For vendor details, contact firstname.lastname@example.org
THE TAMING OF THE SHREW
May 9-10, 2020 5 PM Southern Shakespeare Company A war of the sexes is on in William Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew, presented by Southern Shakespeare's junior acting troupe, The Bardlings, during Southern Shakespeare Company's Free Shakespeare in the Park Festival weekend.
PUBLIC MISSION: EXPEDITION MARS
May 30, 2020 10 AM Challenger Learning Center of Tallahassee Set in the future when humans have established mission control on the Martian Moon Phobos, spacecraft astronauts are on a mission to the surface of Mars to search for evidence of life. They find themselves in a high-risk situation and must work together to complete the mission. Recommended for grades 6 & up; under 4th grade requires a paid accompanying adult. The cost is $6 per person per program for registrations received before 12:00 p.m. the day before the program. Pre-register now: ChallengerTLH.com/public-missions
11 th Annual SATURDAY JUNE 20, 2020 10AM - 3PM AUTOMOBILE MUSEUM FOR MORE INFO ON BECOMING A SPONSOR OR VENDOR CALL: (850) - 201 -3005
Admission is FREE
O N T H E C OV E R
Virginia DAILEY By Georgia“Joy”Bowen | Photography by Kira Derryberry
MY FAITH TELLS ME THAT EACH OF US HAS GOD-GIVEN GIFTS AND BLESSINGS FOR A PURPOSE.
makeup: Lisa Mergel | clothing and accessories: Dillards
tallahassee woman | 34 | april • may 2020
Who is Ginny Dailey? I am an attorney, a professional, a business owner, a wife, a mother, and a community volunteer. I am a Tallahassee resident. I am a tennis player, an avid reader of fiction, nonfiction, and instructional books and materials. I love to cook for friends and family, especially Louisiana cuisine, the food of my native home. I am a proud Tallahassee resident. I think it’s a great Southern city with a great story to tell.
What is your intention? Passion? Purpose?
“My passion is to use the blessings that have been given to me to be a blessing to others. “With great resources comes great responsibility.” I believe Voltaire may have said that first, but our children give credit for that saying to Spiderman. Our family holds helping as a core value, and each of us finds a way to be a helper in our own way.”
What experiences, family values or lessons shaped you growing up in Gonzales, Louisiana?
“My hometown is the Jambalaya Capitol of the World, and very proud of it. We have a Jambalaya 5K Run, a Jambalaya Festival, Jambalaya Singers, and of course a Jambalaya Cooking Competition. My native-born hometown does a great job of telling its story, and I hope my hometown Tallahassee will continue to tell its own story. We have so many things to be proud of in Tallahassee, and I am so honored to be a part of Tallahassee’s next chapter. We have been chosen as one of the top 10 Southern Cities for the last 2 year. We have the fastest growing economy per capita in Florida, and we have the
highest-educated population in Florida. We are home to the National High Magnetic Field Laboratory, a world-class treasure. We are one of the top 10 cities for career opportunities, one of the best cities for job and wage growth in 2019, one of the best cities to start a business, and one of the top 10 places to get a fresh start! We have award-winning universities and highereducation institutions. We have awardwinning quality of life, reflected in our parks, our trees, and so much of our natural environment.
How do you define success?
As a Louisiana native and oyster fan, I am particularly excited about the oyster aquaculture community that is growing in our area. The Panacea Pearl oysters are terrific, and could become a wonderful regional treasure.”
You have vast experiences as a lawyer...What is your most proud accomplishment? Why?
How do you stay grounded and balanced? Self-care plan?
“Anne Lamott says: “It's funny: I always imagined when I was a kid that adults had some kind of inner toolbox full of shiny tools: the saw of discernment, the hammer of wisdom, the sandpaper of patience. But then when I grew up I found that life handed you these rusty bent old tools friendships, prayer, conscience, honesty - and said 'do the best you can with these, they will have to do'. And mostly, against all odds, they do.” Those words have a lot of truth. I go back to those things – friends and prayer – to get back on track. I have a tried-and-true group of friends who are critical in my life. They have been with me through it all – career changes, caring for aging family members, and parenthood. I also try to “live deliberately,” like Thoreau suggested. I believe that life is not something that “happens to me”, but it is a journey that I am traveling. I believe that I have choices about what is important to me and what my values are, and I try to make sure that my actions – where I spend my time - reflect those values. Much easier said than done, of course. But if (when!) I get to a point when I am stretched too thin, I try to take a moment to evaluate which of those activities and obligations are not in line with my values and priorities, and I let them go.” tallahassee woman | 35 | april • may 2020
“Like Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “To laugh often and much; to win the respect of the intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the beauty in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that one life has breathed easier because you lived here. This is to have succeeded.”
“My proudest accomplishment was as an attorney representing the Government of Ethiopia in its disputes with the Government of Eritrea. In 2000, I began a five-year project with a team of lawyers representing the Government of Ethiopia in its legal dispute with its neighboring state, the country of Eritrea. The dispute started with a boundary war in 1998, and involved many different issues, from humanitarian law violations, to boundary disputes, to prisoner-of-war disputes. I had the opportunity and privilege to travel throughout northern Ethiopia collecting the stories of those who lived through the Ethiopia/ Eritirea boundary war, and then sharing those stories at the international tribunal in The Hague. That legal work was a profound honor and privilege for several reasons: first, because I was part of a solution using laws and peace rather than war and violence; second, because I was able to provide a voice to Ethiopian citizens whose stories would not have otherwise been known or told; and third, because I participated in an effort to return prisonersof-war (POWs) to their homes and families, releasing them from prisons on both sides of the boundary following the war. That work was an intense example of how the legal system can help individuals and institutions achieve their goals in lieu of violence or chaos. In Florida, my legal experience has continued to allow me to help clients achieve their strategic goals in the most cost-effective manner. Our firm, Panza Maurer, prides ourselves on bringing
ON T H E C OV E R
creative solutions for clients to achieve their strategic objectives. For example, I assisted a group of physicians to obtain the approvals necessary to construct a new hospital in an underserved area in rural southwest Florida. Folks in the Immokalee area were facing 45-minute drives to the nearest emergency care in Naples, and with this new project, they will have access to 24/7 emergency care within a 10-minute drive. This could be life-changing for the communities in and around Immokalee, and it was an honor to be part of the team bringing that project to the community.
As a busy mother, wife and professional, what advice do you offer to mothers as we approach Mother's Day?
More recently, I assisted a university to obtain approvals for local physicians to participate in its teaching program without the need for specialized faculty permitting. This will give the university the opportunity to expand its teaching program to meet Florida’s growing needs for these specialized health care providers.
“It has been such an honor and privilege to serve in this role in the last two years. I have been invited to meet so many new people, and learn about so many parts of Tallahassee that I didn’t know before.
These are just a few examples of how we work with our clients to evaluate their strategic objectives, consider the various legal and regulatory paths available to achieve those objectives, provide strategic advice and counsel, and then executive that strategy with laser focus. It has been a great honor to support these clients in achieving goals they believe at first to be impossible.”
You wear many hats. How do you prioritize?
“The truth is that working women do not “have it all” or “do it all.” We simply do our best, and that is more than good enough. There are times when I do just enough work to get the project done (rather than fussing over it endlessly in search of perfection) because I prioritize getting home for my children’s after-school activities and for family dinner. There are also times when I skip the children’s after-school activities and classroom holiday parties because I prioritize providing top-quality counsel and advice to my clients. And there are times when I take the day off – just because. My life as a working mother is “precariously balanced” as my friend says, and that balance shifts every month, every week, and every day to meet the needs of my clients, my work family, my church family, my home family, my Tallahassee community, and myself.”
“Cut yourself a break. Your children will be and are fine. They are not perfect, and neither are you, and that is more than good enough. Be nice to yourself, because they are watching how you treat yourself, and that will be a very important lesson in how they treat themselves and others as they grow up.”
How has your role of First Lady impacted your roles or way of life?
It has also opened my eyes to the economic disparity and inequality of our community. These economic disparities are even more of a priority as we face the coronavirus pandemic. One in five of our children lives in poverty; half of our children are not ready for kindergarten when they begin school. Our teenagers are sick. In Florida, the number of self-inflicted injuries for teens (age 12-18) is 93 out of 1,000 teens. In Leon County, it’s almost double that: 152 teens out of 1,000 teens. The current status quo is not good enough; we can and must do better for all of our children and for our community.
information about the CSC initiative; more information is also available at the Leon County CSC Planning Committee website: leoncsc.bookmark.com. I encourage everyone to learn more about this initiative in advance of the November 2020 election day, and consider supporting this exciting new initiative.”
How did you know that John was that special someone?
“We got to know each other through student government and became best friends in that process. (Yes, we were nerds even back in college.) We both really enjoyed the community and the public service involved in student government, and we worked together throughout our undergraduate careers in various roles. In the spring of our junior year, we decided to run for Student Body President and Vice-President together. During that time, we remained friends, and over time, our friendship grew into love. He has absolutely been my best friend for more than 20 years, and is still my best friend today. He has seen me at my worst and still loves me. He brings out the best in me, and always brings me laughter and joy.”
What's your Why?
“My faith tells me that each of us has Godgiven gifts and blessings for a purpose. I strive to understand God’s purpose for me and how I can use the skills and blessings God has given me to be a blessing to others.”
Now that I know these things, I feel a true calling to be part of the solution. Because if I’m not part of the solution, then I am just part of the problem.
Favorite women in your life or history?
My focus in 2020 has been to support the passage of a Children’s Services Council (CSC) in Tallahassee on the November 2020 ballot. A CSC is an independent body that will collaborate and prioritize services for local children and families using data-driven proven strategies. Several other counties have experienced significant success for their communities using the CSC tool, and John and I sincerely want to bring this new tool to our local toolbox. For example, in St. Lucie County, the teen birth rate dropped from 28 in 1,000 to 2 per 1,000; it dropped 90% from the point of CSC investment. I am involved with Our Kids First Leon which is providing
In high school, I taught gymnastics and acrobatics for children and cheerleaders. The owner of that gymnasium ( Judy Grounds) was strict and no-nonsense with all of us employees, and I learned so much about management, leadership, and the business world in that job. She also was a ton of fun, and she taught me a lot about how to balance business and fun.
tallahassee woman | 36 | april • may 2020
“I have been blessed with some great women mentors in my life.
At FSU, Patsy Palmer was the First Lady of FSU as the wife of FSU President Sandy D’Alemberte. She encouraged me so much to stretch the boundaries of other people’s expectations and assumptions about me, and to go after any goal I had in mind.
Throughout FSU law school (and my subsequent career), I stayed in touch with Mrs. Palmer and President D’Alemberte who both continued to encourage me and provide guidance. Their integrity and lifelong commitment to the greater good have been a guiding light throughout my professional and personal life. In particular, I aspire to use my legal skills to help those in need, based on their lifelong example of doing just that.
and for Tallahassee. When I am looking to make a decision, he is a go-to person for me.
My mother-in-law has been a great supporter and encourager in my life. She has been constantly supportive and available to help with the children, which is invaluable for a two-working-parent family. As a retired teacher, her perspective has also been helpful. When I struggle with disciplining our rambunctious children, she reminds me that their energy can be channeled and that there can be true joy even with an unruly family dinner table.
Tell us about your passion for the pro-bono work that you do?
My friends, including my baby sister, have been invaluable mentors and supporters for me, and are also heroes to me. They are each badass professionals in their work roles, tremendous mothers, wives and friends in their home roles, and generous and creative volunteers in their community roles. In terms of a celebrity hero, I really admire Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I have been a fangirl of hers for some time – reading her speeches and writings, reading books about her, and watching movies about her. I am so inspired by her tenacity and hopefulness, and I hope to bring those characteristics to my life, family, and community.”
Our children are a huge influence. Since we have had children, I consider many more choices from their perspective – from climate change to what movies and television we watch. I also laugh more, and jump on the trampoline, and consider questions like how birds fly and how light waves travel through space.”
“I have done pro bono adoptions since 2005 when we moved to Tallahassee. Adoption Day is my favorite day in court - to be with a family as they adopt a baby or child into their family. These are real people, and I am helping them with one of the most important milestones in their lives. It is the most satisfying legal work. In addition, I have found that I enjoy seeking solutions for big-picture problems in addition to helping individuals. For example, in addition to helping
Greatest influences in your life?
“My family is my greatest influence. In my first family, I am the oldest of five siblings. We are only 5 years apart, so we are very close together in age. Those 4 people have been a huge influence in my life. We learned to water ski and drive a boat together. We grew up together – as children, as teenagers, as young adults, and even now. We fought as children, and still fight sometimes even as adults. But they are part of me, and I am blessed to have them in my life. My husband is one of my greatest influences. He makes me laugh. He is a great sounding board. He is full of ideas and enthusiasm and love for this world tallahassee woman | 37 | april • may 2020
individual children find “forever families”, I am advocating for the passage of a Children’s Services Council (CSC) in Leon County, which I believe will help all of our children have greater opportunities for success, now and into the future. This measure will help, not just one-by-one, but on a population-level, which is very exciting.”
How can women use their voices and advocate for themselves, family, community or others?
“Be deliberate and intentional. What matters to you will be different than what matters to me. So find what matters to you, and pursue it with all of your heart, mind, and strength. Look around right where you are.
You can make a difference in whatever place you are – in your church, in your children’s school, in your family, in your workplace, in your profession, or in your community overall. Don’t wait for someone to invite you; just go to the next meeting or event, and say “How can I help?” I want to share my story about our family’s decision for John to run for Mayor. When John first proposed that he wanted to run for Mayor, I must admit that I had a lot of questions and hesitation. So we discussed it and considered the impact to our family and household. When we decided to go ahead with his campaign, the “pomp and circumstance” – participating in the Winter Festival or Springtime parades – was not the deciding factor. (Although our children might disagree – they love the parades!) The deciding factor was the opportunity to make a difference in a long-lasting, meaningful way, and to live out our family values of service and community.”
From where do you draw your strength?
“I love all of Anne Lamott’s writing. One of my favorites of her writings is: ”Hope is not about proving anything. It's about choosing to believe this one thing: that love is bigger than any grim, bleak shit anyone can throw at us.” That comes from Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith, one of my favorite books, and a book that I go back to time and again over the years. During this coronavirus and home quarantine, I have gone back to her writings and they continue to provide comfort, humor, and strength. Her writings point to God as her core strength, and I share that faith. God is my strength. Now please don’t mistake me. Many people have used the title of “Christian” to claim principles and values with which I disagree. My God is a God of love. My God loves all people at all times in all seasons, no matter what. My God calls me to feed the poor, orphans, and widows, and to be a helper. Going back to those core principles gives me strength and hope.”
What do you know for sure?
“I know for sure that God loves me and loves this world, including Tallahassee and each and every one of us. And that if I allow myself to be God’s hands and feet, I can be a part of God’s beautiful, loving, wonderful plan for Tallahassee and for me.”
Women Who Mean Business Awards
TWM will be recognizing the most inspiring and influential businesswomen in our community for the following award categories: • • • • • •
Entrepreneur Award Innovator Award Legacy Award Rockstar Award Service Award Torchbearer Award
Women on Fire! Because we care about your safety and the wellness of the community, TWM has postponed the Women Who Mean Business Awards. We hope to host the event very soon and will keep you posted on social media and email.
NOMINATIONS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MONDAY, APRIL 20TH AT MIDNIGHT.
TICKETS ARE $65 To purchase tickets or become a sponsor visit
For further information or questions call (850) 893-9624 or e-mail WWMB@talwoman.com
TRAVEL IN TIME
tallahassee woman | 40 | april • may 2020
MADAME XHALES IN THE FOOTSTEPS OF FOREMOTHERS by regina lynch-hudson photography by courtland bivens iii
As a publicist-cum-family history researcher, I’m on a continuous journey to chronicle the untold stories of my ancestors and their colorful tri-racial heritage. Not only can I identify five consecutive generations of maternal foremothers, but historians are awed that the uninterrupted sequence of bygone-era portraiture exists! The rare visual opportunity, made possible by a vast vintage pictorial collection, prompted me to creatively curate commemorative ancestral treasures. Heirlooms, whether inherited or passionately custom-crafted, speak to our souls and create connections to the identities that shape us. You, too, can breathe life into nostalgic memorabilia with the help of metalsmiths, jewelers, and restoration experts.
My globe-trekking lifestyle often times found me shopping for now-insignificant trinkets that collect dust in my jewelry box. Sure, I was once dazzled by Balenciaga, Mikimoto and Tiffany, as much as the next brand-distracted diva. But it’s when I don my conversation-piece Foremother’s Necklace, that I am euphorically-uplifted. The five faces have accompanied me down the red carpet and up the entrepreneurial ladder—steps they dared not ascend in their lifetimes. Project conceptualization consisted of procuring vintage pocket watches through estate sales and EBay auctions, and scouring the country for collaborative jewelers to bring my sketches to life. Through my objet d' art, you meet my great-great-great grandmother, Sarah “Sallie” Freeman (1820-1900), the earliest portrait in my maternal line-up. Sallie is listed in the 1860 Polk County, North Carolina Census as “mulatto,” living
on the G.J. Mills Farm. Though Sallie was of Native American and French ancestry, Native Americans who lived in predominately black or white households blended in, and did not identify themselves as Native American. Also depicted on the necklace is Sallie’s daughter, my great-great grandmother, Francis Freeman Payne (1848-1892). Francis’s father was reportedly a white planter. Francis was the wife of George Washington Richard Henry Lee Payne (1838-1927), a Methodist minister and an original blacksmith for the famed Biltmore Estate, America’s largest historic home. Francis bore him 12 children, a tri-racial mix of European, Sub-Saharan African, and Native American blood. Reportedly, George’s father was fullblooded African and his mother was part Cherokee. Hattie Othella Payne Burnette (1892-1986), my great-grandmother, was the youngest child of George Payne and Francis Freeman Payne, born mere months before Francis died. My grandmother, Helen Juanita Burnette Lynch, and mother, Hattie Geneva Lynch, also dangle from the ancestral breastplate. My matriarchal tribe has also escorted me throughout Europe, Africa, Asia, and ports aboard, on a bracelet. A regal Foremother’s Crown, forged of precious metals, is symbolic of the strength that they radiated. A Healing Necklace, comprised of medicinal moss agate beads and silver herbal leaves, celebrates paternal greatgrandmother, Mary Louisa Stepp Burnette Hayden (1858-1956), a legendary medicine woman and midwife.
Hands on Japan
tallahassee woman | 41 | april • may 2020
The Healing Necklace
TRAVEL IN TIME
Victorian Love Seat
Home is our “sacred space,” where we integrate prized and ancient family tree through DNA testing. Explore possessions and cherished keepsakes that inspire and your foremothers’ contributions to society and harness comfort us. Our homes reveal our stories. their power in the environment around you. The pièce de resistance, a revamped loveseat (circa 1880), appears fragile, but is in fact quite resilient, much like the succession of womenfolk who’ve inherited it. For as long as I can recall, the loveseat has been a part of my life. Over the years, the upholstery has morphed from Victorian-era florals to velvety mustard to gold-metallic leather. Despite attempts to stain the settee’s dark walnut limbs, her right arm bears a faint scar—a reminder that no matter how far we evolve, badges of our triumphs and struggles live on in our surroundings.
Victorian Love Seat Inscription
The first step in honoring of your foremothers is to retrace their path. Learn more about their origins Veteran publicist and luxury lifestyle experience-aholic, Regina Lynch-Hudson, pens MadameXhales, slated towards the vintage of woman that according to studies: enjoys more time to travel, indulges in longer trips, and selects more extravagant travel accommodations. The exacting taste of MadameXhales finds her exploring destinations, cruises, resorts, spas, and extracurricular activities—where like-minded Xhalers have experienced inner-exhilaration! © Contact MadameXhales: email@example.com
tallahassee woman | 42 | april • may 2020
SPRING! s g n i v a S Move into a New Apartment Home between April 1 and May 31, 2020 and You’ll Receive:
50% off Your 3rd and 7th Month!*
WE INSPIRE HOPE
To schedule your complimentary lunch and tour, call today! (850) 502-8986
by positively impacting the way our community experiences serious illness or grief - one family at a time. 1723 MAHAN CENTER BOULEVARD, TALLAHASSEE, FL (850) 878-5310 | WWW.BIGBENDHOSPICE.ORG
100 John Knox Rd. Tallahassee, FL 32303 #AL9730
*Offer expires on 5/31/20. New residents only. Some restrictions apply.
tallahassee woman | 43 | april • may 2020
Custom Homes • Remodels • Additions
3375-C Capital Circle NE, Tallahassee, FL 32308
FL Lic# CBC 1258003 GA Lic# RBCO 004496
ABOUT YOUR LEGS THIS SUMMER
Our Board Certified Vascular Specialists invite you to determine if your troublesome varicose veins are more than just cosmetic. Most insurance plans provide coverage for patients with venous disease. Vascular Surgery Associates offers a full service line of both, non and minimally invasive treatment plans. Please call for a consultation.
Vascular Surgery Associates
Vascular Surgery Associates | Drs. Kaelin, Brumberg & Smith 2631 Centennial Blvd. | Tallahassee, FL 32308 | 850-877-8539 | www.vsafl.com tallahassee woman | 44 | april • may 2020
Women Who Mean
SPECI A L SECTION
Elizabeth Ekk WOMEN TO WATCH
MEN WHO MEAN BUSINESS
tallahassee woman | 45 | april • may 2020
Business | women to watch
WOMEN IN BUSINESS WHO WALK IN FAITH
worked my way up through the corporate world, and as my girls grew older, it gave me an opportunity to have more freedom to go into business for myself. This led me to open my store, Found for Home. Everyone around me kept saying “This is what you need to do. This is what God has blessed you with”, and for me, it’s really about what God wants me to do and where He’s leading me. I started my career in small business banking, and I was able to
hen I was a stay at home mom, I devoted my time to raising my children and volunteering with my church. After my children grew up, I began to wonder what my next step would be. Robin O’Donnell is a close friend of mine, and she told me of her desire to open a kitchen store. I was familiar with her strengths in project managing, and I knew I wanted to be a part of this business venture with her. The encouragement I have received from Jennifer Hagenbuch and my husband have helped immensely as I opened The Prepared Table with Robin. Through kind words and motivation, I have constantly been given the reminder that God is with me throughout this whole process. Within our business, we have been able to incorporate our primary mission, which is ministry. Upon opening the store, I have been stretched in ways I never knew I was capable of. For example,
help a lot of small business owners through what I did. I was able to see what worked and what didn’t, and that the people who were most successful were the ones that followed their passion. Since I had a background in business, that’s where I think women really need encouragement. It’s a lot different being in the corporate world versus owning your own business. When you’re the owner, you learn a lot. I have amazing team members, including my manager, my husband, and a wonderful group of friends and family that encourage me. I’ve learned a lot, but I’ve also learned when to ask for help when something is not a strength of mine. I mentor other women-owned businesses, so I would say to find a mentor before you open the door, someone’s who’s already been there and done that. People don’t always want to hear “Your business is so awesome and everything is great”, they want to hear the real stuff, and they need to hear that.
taking on accounting was a bit out of my comfort zone, but I can honestly say it’s the best kind of stress! I always have the desire to learn more so that I can continue to help others in the future. If you have been interested in opening a small business, go for it! The relationships you will form make everything worth it. I would also recommend going into business with a partner you trust. This experience with Robin continues to change my life each day, and I would encourage anyone with a passion to take this leap of faith! tallahassee woman | 46 | april • may 2020
BY KINSLEY SOUTHWORTH
rior to opening The Prepared Table with Laura Forster, I worked as a project manager for a project engineering firm. As this chapter came to a close, I began to assess my options. As soon as I mentioned the possibility of opening a kitchen store to Laura, she was immediately interested. In that moment, we knew we were in this together. After praying about this new business venture, God opened up every door for us. We knew that our store would be a perfect way to have a ministry, but also a business we loved as well. Jennifer Hagenbuch, our mentor, met with us prior to opening, and she provided us with incredibly beneficial advice. This included tips on opening a business, and what it means, specifically, to be a woman in business. So many of our friends and family members have prayed for us, and we have felt these prayers being answered through each step of our journey thus far. From the very beginning,
I knew the workload ahead of me could potentially feel overwhelming at times. But as I began working, I felt overwhelming peace, and I knew the Lord was carrying us. An incredibly wise woman that I follow on social media knew about our store in its early stages and said, “Get ready for the best rollercoaster ride you’ve ever had!” This has held true throughout our experience, and we couldn’t be more grateful for where God is going to take us. If you have a desire to open your own small business, prepare for the rollercoaster ride, and go for it!
Robin O'Donnell make things happen for people, my thought and imagination of owning my own business increased every year of my life and became a reality.
s a child, I imagined myself sitting around a large conference table with many people discussing, how to grow the “People Can Do Anything” business larger. I would pray and ask God to help me to become a business owner. My mother and father taught us as young children, that whatever we imagined, we could do. I imagined that I would own this large company, teaching people to become whatever wanted. I imagined people working with me from all over the world, and also meeting regularly to enhance our business. With that imagination, watching my mom, as one of the few women business owners, became a daily routine. Being taught that God has created us in his image and after his likeness, to
tallahassee woman | 47 | april • may 2020
In 2012, due to one of the members of our church, Life Changers, losing her job as a childcare worker after 25 years, I opened Dream Builders Greatness Child Development Center, serving children ages six weeks to five years old. Because many of the children had older siblings, I started Dream Builders Greatness After School Program. So, from a child to now, my imagination of what God has ordained for me to do keeps growing. There have been setbacks, but much more successes. I know what God has called me to do and my faith in God keeps me going no matter what. Serving people is my call and assignment from God.
Business | leading
LEADERSHIP LEADING LADIES BY GENYNE H. BOSTON, PHD
have long been intrigued and captivated by the strength, beauty and stamina exhibited by leading ladies on the big screen, the classroom, the courtroom, and in the community. As a classic movie enthusiast, I am reminded of the nostalgic roles and performances of leading ladies from cinema such as Barbara Stanwyck (Strange Love of Martha Ivers, 1946), Dorothy Dandridge (Carmen Jones, 1954 ), and Bette Davis (All About Eve, 1950) who each mesmerized audiences with unforgettable portrayals of unrelenting women who pranced to the beat of a different drummer. On and off the screen, leading ladies everywhere unapologetically establish life agendas that fall outside the boundaries of societal norms prescribed to women. As an educator and leader in higher education, I can only hope to embody the same level of unrelenting strength, grace, and dignity I see in other leading ladies, especially those in higher education. According to the American Council on Education (ACE), “although women now earn the majority of all college degrees and are well represented in entry-and mid-level positions in most economic sectors, they have made surprisingly little progress in advancing to chief executive positions anywhere, including higher education.” Other industries, including business and politics, show that there have been
significant shifts for female leaders. They are more recognized and revered for their abilities to lead effectively, impact change within the industry while still serving as engaged caregivers to their families and communities, and act as selfless role models to other aspiring female leaders. Women leaders often struggle with striking the right balance because there is the need to find the answer, make everything right for everyone, and do it all with a smile. In my observations of women leaders that I have grown to love and admire, I see all too often these women saying “yes” when they really mean “no”. I see these women taking on one more assignment because leadership wants the job done right. I see these women being “Volun-told Volunteers” for assignments and jobs they did not ask for, but took on in the interest of the greater good. Educator, writer and civil rights activist Toni Cade Bambara reminds us that “Revolution begins with the self, in the self…,” and while the context of her statement has greater significance in accordance with gender equality, I believe this profound message is relevant to female leaders who neglect themselves emotionally, physically, and even spiritually sometimes. Women leaders must take bold steps toward regular self-care that may require stepping back, pausing before confirming, and even saying no. Author Kevin Cashman’s idea that “Pause powers tallahassee woman | 48 | april • may 2020
purposeful performance” offers insightful perspective for how to respond in a fastpaced, demanding world. When was the last time you may have taken a self-serving pause during a busy day? It can make a difference for a how day starts and/or ends. The next time you find yourself moving at warp speed, consider pausing to do the following:
1) Ten minutes of mindful breathing exercise 2) Intentional Listing (Prompt: List everything good about the day) 3) Write a “thinking of you” note to friend 4) Weekend Pause (watching a classic movie starring a favorite leading lady) 5) Find an inspirational thought or quote, write on a sticky note, and post it to your DESKTOP COMPUTER.
DREAM GRADUATE RISE
Special full-page Graduate Profiles will be available to showcase our graduates in the June/July issue! For more information email firstname.lastname@example.org
DUE MAY 8, 2020
talwoman.com THE PERFECT BALANCE OF STYLE AND DESIGN COMING
Work. Life. Balance. Summer Brooke Gomez, PhD
Professional Identity Workplace Social Strategies Ambitious Couples Exceptional Adolescents Creativity & Spirituality FSU MSW & PhD in
Marriage & Family Therapy
Individuals Couples & Families
CLASSICAL • FUNCTIONAL • BEAUTIFUL Complete Design Services
Over 28 years design experience
Nikki Bowden, Allied Member ASID
There is incredible wisdom within you. Awaken it.
WWW.ARTOFARRANGEMENT.NET FL LCSW 12608
tallahassee woman | 49 | april • may 2020
F E AT U R E
Women Who Mean
lizabeth is an entrepreneur, marketing manager, teacher & friend. She enjoys the process of buying & selling real estate. Her passion is to see families grow & participate in helping customers reach their goals. From a young age, Elizabeth Ekk had a knack for turning a house into a home. She learned how to work at an early age helping her parents maintain their rental units and flip homes. Her parents immigrated from the Philippines to Prince George, British Columbia, Canada with limited cash and 1 suitcase to make a better life for their future family. Elizabeth & her husband both hold two citizenships – Canadian and American & have three American born & raised Tallahassians. With a pipeline of new construction, resale opportunities, and a team of motivated realtors on board, she intends to help many more residents find their dream home. “The best part of my job is that I get to surrender myself to God and see how he uses me as a tool,” said Ekk. “I connect people, and then get to watch their happiness come to fruition and their goals to be obtained.” Ekk considers her three children and 19 years of marriage to be her most cherished achievements. She demonstrates to her kids the importance of community involvement by supporting local causes such as 211 Big Bend, Fellowship Christian Athletes, United Partners of Human Services, Leon County Schools.
“17 years ago, I moved to Tallahassee,” says Ekk, “and since then, I have been helping people see how great the quality of life is here.
“My hope is that I help recruit and keep families that want to continue enhancing Tallahassee’s business and community as a whole.” I am grateful to my parents & my husband who have sacrificed their comfort to move to a new country with no family, major weather change, very little knowledge about the community, new jobs….only the hope & belief that they can each build a new career, surround themselves with a community that symbolizes a sense of family & a home that welcomes all.
50 | WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 special section
Incredible Natural Beauty, Unparalleled Hospitality. Whether you’re enjoying award-winning craft breweries and restaurants on-the-go or exploring over 700 miles of trails and waterways that make up our region, Florida’s Capital Region surprises in all the best ways. VisitTallahassee.com special section WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 | 51
Women Who Mean
hat inspired you to come to Tallahassee? “Tallahassee was never on my radar to settle down with my family. BUT, early last year my fiancé started looking for jobs and came across an amazing opportunity here . From there I started doing my research. It's a college town!!! My son was entering high school, so the timing was perfect too. Selfishly— I said it's the perfect place to settle down
because he had amazing universities and colleges to community colleges to choose from and still stay within my reach when he graduated. In a nutshell— career opportunities and the college system. It just so happens, there were a few openings at WTXL and the rest is history!” What about Tallahassee inspires you? “Tallahassee is a beautiful city filled with charm, love, potential and so many opportunities.
52 | WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 special section
I actually read the city's 5-year strategic plan. Not for leisure, but I read it for research for a story after I moved here.The more I read it, the more I realized that there are a group of city leaders who are looking to the future and realize the change is needed. The people I meet every day from politicians to small business owners, to teachers— people in the grocery store— they are always SO passionate about the city and the people here. They are quick to tell
me about how things used to be and how things have changed over the past 10 years.”
overseas during the Vietnam War and got married while my dad was stationed there.”
How do you see your position as an Anchor impacting the lives of the community? “I hope people see me as a true member of their community. My son attends public school, we live in the middle of town, we support local business— we shop where you shop. I am no different from your next-door neighbor. I want people to be able to cut on the news in the morning and say— I met her the other day! She's just like me!!! I want them to trust me— enough to tell their stories and what matters most to them.
What matters most to you? “Family and happiness! I always tell people who put career and money first to simply chill out! I was that person for a long time!!! I've climbed the "corporate ladder" and had to climb back down for my mental and physical health.
I often hear from not only people of color, but almost everyone I meet— "we needed someone like you on TV." I'm not sure what was here before— but I take that to heart.
Why is it important to empower others? “Two tragic events helped to shape who I am today. The death of my nephew in a car accident when he was 19 years old and BOTH of my parents survived being shot in a home invasion. I was a single mom for a very long time and have struggled, mentally, financially and in every way in between. I've been at the top and the bottom. And, through all of that— I've learned so much from my parents, from my sister, from my family— that you will be ok! I want people to be able to listen to my story and know that no matter what you go through in life, there is always someone who is going through something worse. What's the saying, "This too shall pass." When I tell stories, know that I can almost always relate in some way and they can trust that I have their best interest at heart.”
I hope to be able to bring attention to matters that people wouldn't normally pay attention to. I've worked in TV since I was 17 years old, still in high school and many of the initiatives we've taken up— didn't always represent what I felt the community needed. Most recently, our parent company took part in a reading campaign at a local elementary school and I remember telling our GM— I didn't think being at the school that day would impact me like it did. We were able to give the students a free book fair and hearing the kids say they had never owned a book— brought tears to my eyes.” Tell us about your unique background as you are of both African American and Thai heritage? “My mom is from Thailand, my dad is African American. They met while he was in the Army, stationed
For the longest, I was a single mom raising my only child and working in TV is 24 hours. I lived 10 hours away from family at the peak of his youth and it got to the point where I knew I needed to slow down. I was missing valuable time with him.”
What individuals have been your greatest mentors or inspiration? “My parents have been a huge inspiration in my life. They've been married for 48 years! There are
four of us children and I'm the third child, the baby girl (spoiled!!). We are a middle-class family and being a mom now, I always question— How in the world did they raise four children? I talk to them both almost EVERY SINGLE DAY— by VIDEO CHAT!!!
“I hope to be able to bring attention to matters that people wouldn't normally pay attention to.” They've always made sure that no matter how old us children are - we are taken care of. We always had a place to come home too and they're home has been a revolving door to the grandchildren and to us!!! My Dad, to me, has always been the ultimate DAD. (I can't believe I'm tearing up writing this!!) I always joked that I wouldn't get married until I found a man that measured up to him! I found the man now, but he always encouraged me to do what makes me happy. He wasn't perfect, we grew up scared of him, he was extremely strict— but he was and is always proud of all of his children. He taught us all to stand up for what you believe in, no matter the cost. My mom— being an immigrant, may not think she's a huge inspiration to me— but she's my number one inspiration. She left Thailand and came to America, leaving her entire family behind. She's such a hard worker, so smart and absolutely hilarious at the same time. She had to learn how to adjust to an entirely new way of life—new cultures— and not to mention, she can throw down cooking not only Thai food , but soul food as well. They both taught me that—you can do it all and have it all.”
special section WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 | 53
Women Who Mean
computers to computer aided dispatch to body worn cameras and more. My pathway to this position began back in 1997 when I became a Public Information Officer (PIO) for my prior agency, the Thomasville Police Department. In addition to being an investigator, I was responsible for relaying all information on criminal cases to the media. I did my first interview with WCTV in the lobby and was I nervous! My Chief told me to use my college degree in Communication, but it sure didn’t prepare me for the camera. Little did I know until I tried, speaking to a camera came naturally. People always told me I could talk to anyone so I guess that helped. I remained a PIO for Thomasville Police through 2006 when I was promoted to Lieutenant and became a member of Command Staff. Five
hat was your pathway to this leadership role? “I am the first person with the Tallahassee Police Department to be in the position as Social Media Director. I have been dedicated to TPD’s online presence for the past five years. I’ve been a law enforcement officer since 1993 and witnessed the entire industry change from handwritten reports to in-car
54 | WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 special section
years later, I joined the Tallahassee Police Department, starting all over as an officer on midnight shift, working the Southside of Tallahassee. In 2014, I was asked to be an adjunct PIO for TPD. Soon after, I began building the social media program for TPD in addition to my assignment at the time in Financial Crimes as an Investigator. In 2017, I was asked by the Chief to work fulltime as a PIO with the primary assignment of social media. TPD joined Nextdoor at this time after I presented it to the Chief the year before as a great way to reach the public in an “online neighborhood” format. The road hasn’t always been easy because social media is unforgiving. I always strive to humanize the badge, push all the positive things the agency does on a daily basis which many are unaware, share the information we provide to the media, give the community a glimpse “behind the badge” and provide information on crime prevention and traffic safety. Fortunately, my tenure in the profession and serving in multiple units at both agencies including 12 years as a police supervisor, was very helpful. My training and experience have helped me stay professional, use the right kind of humor when warranted and provide a great service to the community. Social Media is very interesting as there is a large, diverse audience. Most of it has been on the job training for me but I constantly strive to learn best practices. I have been the only person doing TPD’s social media for five years and it has been fun yet very challenging.” How would you describe the most fulfilling part of your job? “I love serving the community and helping others. I miss a lot of the face to face contact in working with people I had as a patrol officer and investigator. However, I have communicated with so many more people online than would have been
humanly possible answering calls for service or investigating a crime. Sometimes I have been there for people to reach out to when no one else was available and they didn’t want to call for an officer to respond. I have truly enjoyed being “the online voice” for TPD and helping others by providing pertinent information. I’ve also enjoyed the positive community events and programs to take pictures and videos in order to share with the community.”
“We can all be leaders in our community and workplace. Informal leaders can be the most powerful.” Have you experienced any challenges along the way? “There have been numerous challenges along the way. I have learned by trial and error in the arena of social media marketing. There have been a few mistakes for sure but I always learned from them and kept working to provide the best service for TPD online. Social media and providing information to the public is similar to firing a gun. Once the bullet leaves the gun, it’s gone and you can’t get it back. It can strike and cause harm if you aren’t careful with the information you provide. Timing is everything. Working as a police officer in the Communication and Marketing area of the department, I understand and abide by our legal guidelines in releasing information. We have Marsy’s Law and Florida Statute 119 which have to be followed even if everyone is angry about it. Making the right choices for our online presence is a constant theme. I work in crisis communication and confidential information constantly. I’ve helped provide information through numerous violent crimes, the Hot Yoga shooting, three hurricanes
and now COVID-19. All were and are challenging.” What matters most to you? “Integrity and kindness.” What is your inner voice or heart telling you? “I choose to follow and honor my inner voice. Be amazing, be kind, do good things without expectation of reciprocity, always get back up when you fall down, other people don’t dictate my thoughts and actions as I am responsible for those alone. Attitude is everything so have a good one. This life is all we’ve got so make it a good one in all the right ways. What are your core values? Faith, integrity, perseverance, love, loyalty, open-mindedness, consistency, and dependability.” What does it mean to you to be successful? “I’ve learned in all my years in law enforcement that one does not have to hold rank to be a leader. We can all be leaders in our community and workplace. Informal leaders can be the most powerful. In my early years I used to think my success in law enforcement was contingent on promotions as it reflected the hard work and dedication I had for my community. I learned over time and maturity, success is doing my best every day, helping others, and making a difference where I can. Success is a pillow test. If I have peace of mind knowing I’ve done my very best with full integrity, I can sure sleep well at night!” What advice do you have for your girls, teens, young women? “Don’t be too hard on yourself. You will make mistakes as you live but make good choices for the right reasons. Never get too involved in a position or title that you forget your teammates. Never get too involved in a career that you forget your faith and family. Make time for yourself
and find balance. Laugh a lot and give it your best. Never forget you are a unique, amazing individual.” What is your inspiration? “My faith in God, my family and my friends.” Who have been or who are the most influential women in your life? “My mother and my Nana (my grandmother). They showed me unconditional love through my mistakes and times of darkness. My spouse who is a sergeant at TPD. She showed me how to find the light and seek the laughter after a horrific accident in 2014. All of these wonderful women are my number one fans and I am theirs. My Nana passed away in June 2018 from Alzheimer’s with me by her side holding her hand as she transitioned. She inspired me in life as well as in death. Her faith was so strong. What do you do for fun or selfcare? “Oh yes! One of the most important things you can do when you are spinning so many important plates. Self-care and balance are very important. I am a fitness fanatic! You will find me in Midtown, on a bicycle somewhere on the road or trails, or spinning at Redefine Fitness. Physical fitness is a great stress reliever and staying healthy is so important to give your best in life. I recently obtained a certification from NASM as a Certified Personal Trainer in order to help others. Prayer and music are a way I unwind. I love to listen to a variety of music. Every morning before I get up, I pray and give it all to God. I usually forget during the day that God is in control and have to stop and pray it away again. This happens several times a day because some of us (me) think we can actually drive the car (life) on our own without ever having an accident (making a mistake).”
special section WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 | 55
MEN Who Mean BUSINESS
WHO ARE THE TWM MEN WHO MEAN BUSINESS? TWM is excited and proud to feature the first annual issue of Men Who Mean Business (MWMB) profiles. These men serve in business and the community supporting the mission of women in Tallahassee. Research reveals that when men are dedicated to including women in leadership and business and advocating for gender equity and equality in the workplace, organizations experience statistically significant progress. The TWM “Men Who Mean Business” exemplify outstanding support of women through their medical and law practices, community services, non-profit agencies, philanthropic contributions, leadership, volunteerism, advocacy, employment practices and commitment. TWM Men Who Mean Business demonstrate core values that support the best interest, mission and vision of Tallahassee women. TALLAHASSEE WOMAN MAGAZINE MWMB!
56 | WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 special section
MEN Who Mean BUSINESS STEVEN L. EVANS A distinguished leader, a connector, a mentor to many, Steve Evans is the consummate change agent; a driving force in the community who cares about people. Using his unique skills and business acumen, Steve offers valuable expertise to numerous boards, CEO’s and individuals. Steve illuminates others by listening and helping them to organically discover their own answers. He is a man who means business and empowers others. Through his mentoring and service, Steve exemplifies outstanding support for the women and men of Tallahassee and beyond. Steve grew up in Michigan and is a 1971 graduate of the University of Michigan. After playing 6 years in the St. Louis Cardinal organization, Steve joined IBM where he retired as Vice President with extensive executive experience that encompassed sales, operations and divisional leadership across North America. Steve was also the IBM Senior State Executive for the State of Florida. Since retiring from IBM, Steve has been part of a group of local investors and mentors who have directly assisted and invested in starting several new companies that cover the manufacturing, technology, financial and Internet industry. During that same time, Steve has & continues to serve as a mentor/coach to a number of executives and organizations throughout the Southeast United States. Steve and his wife Linda have resided in Tallahassee since 1986 and have two children who, along with their families, now live in Tallahassee. Steve serves on many Civic and Corporate Boards, to include, Florida Tax-Watch Research Institute: Board, Executive Committee and former Chairman; Tallahassee Memorial Hospital: Board, Executive Committee, Immediate Past Chairman; Prime Meridian Bank: Board; Fringe Benefits Management Corporation: Board and Vice Chairman; Leon County: Economic Vitality Leadership Council: Chairman; Kyra Info Systems: Board and Mentor to the CEO; Florida State University Research “GAP Committee” (tech transfer); United Way of the Big Bend.
Entrepreneurship; Applied Fiber Holding, Inc., Board Member; Municipal Code Corporation, Board Member; Leon County Sales Tax Commission, Chairman; and Tallahassee & Florida Chamber of Commerce: Board and Executive Committee. Steve has been the recipient of many awards and acknowledgements, which include, Sunshine State-Ethics in leadership Award: Florida State University– College of Business; Distinguished Leadership/Servant Leadership Award: Leadership Tallahassee; Business Advocate of the Year: FSU Jim Moran Institute for Global Entrepreneurship; and the 2017 - Lifetime Leadership Award: Leadership Tallahassee.
Steve has formerly served on these Civic/Corporate Boards that include Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University, Board Member; State of Florida, Education Foundation Chairman; FSU-Jim Moran Institute for Global
special section WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 | 57
MEN Who Mean BUSINESS
Sherman Rosier with his clients.
SHERMAN ROSIER, GPT, CFT, NSCA-CPT
Sherman Rosier, noted fitness and wellness expert and entrepreneur, is a community leader in health and fitness for over twenty years. He is the founder and owner of Fit & Functional, Inc. Sherman believes that wellness is a vital component of enjoying and living life to the fullest. His passion and pleasure is to specialize in an industry that assists individuals to improve their physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being. Since the start his business in 2000, the client base has been dominated by women. It is his humility and caring that has attracted women and aided Sherman's 20 year success in the wellness industry. Shermanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s daily interaction is with women that have come to know him, appreciate his humanity and expertise, and support his efforts as he supports theirs. "The women clients he is privileged to serve and the female team members of Fit & Functional are a blessing to me, just as much as I hope I have been to them." Sherman believes that cultivating and nurturing relationships is the key to success. He is passionate about self-care and life balance and demonstrates this in his daily life and work. Sherman would like to use this opportunity to thank each and every female client and employee that has been a part of Fit & Functional over the past twenty years. It is partly because of these magnificent women that he is able to continue to do what he loves. To be clear, this is by no means dismissive to all the male clients that have been served at Fit and Functional, as Sherman and his team have worked with many.
58 â&#x20AC;&#x201A; | WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 special section
Fit & Functional offers real time virtual training sessions through Zoom or FaceTime for individuals or small groups. Sherman is honored to be among the Men Who Means Business, supporting the wellness goals of women in the community and beyond.
WHAT WOMEN ARE SAYING: "After a serious injury, surgeries, and physical therapy in 2012, I came to Sherman at Fit & Functional. I have steadily gained strength, balance and confidence with his help. His expertise and kindness were just what I needed. My sessions with Sherman are the best preventive medicine. I am stronger now in my 70s than any time in recent decades." -Kris E. "I have been a client of Fit & Functional for 12+ years. My main goal at the time I joined was to achieve a level of fitness that would keep me toned and in shape. Now, at 62 years of age, I feel better than I ever have. My balance and stability have improved and it has given me confidence in continuing a high level of activity as I age." -Melanie L.
MEN Who Mean BUSINESS DR. KERRY MCCORD First and foremost, Dr. Kerry McCord is the proud husband of Dr. Michelle Mitcham, the owner and publisher of Tallahassee Woman Magazine! Together, they have raised 5 wonderful children, 3 girls and 2 boys. Dr. McCord is licensed as a chiropractic physician practicing “the best of natural medicine” since 1973 and serving Tallahassee residents since 2012. He is renowned as a clinician, author and educator, and is internationally known for his contributions to the practice of applied kinesiology, a system of analysis and therapeutics that uses “manual muscle testing” as a window on the nervous system, observing for signs of “physiology gone wrong” and identifying how normal function might be restored. Dr. McCord uniquely serves those whose life has been disrupted by persistent and seemingly unresolvable health challenges including unrelenting pain and inflammation (often food related sensitivities), migraine and other headaches, digestive distress, chronic fatigue, sleep disorders, and a myriad of chronic problems that don’t respond favorably to other methods, conventional and alternative.
WHAT WOMEN ARE SAYING: “I suffered a crushed left leg, 3 titanium rods, a drop foot and severe difficulty walking without stumbling for the past 14 years. After one treatment I was able to walk without complication!” “Dr. Kerry McCord found food allergies that had been bothering me for years…. I am now on my way to a full recovery.” “Months after being released from the hospital with right sided weakness from a stroke… I wasn’t improving enough to be confident in daily situations. Under Dr. McCord’s care, I am now riding a bicycle and jogging. The walker and cane once used are a distant memory.” “I have seen Dr. McCord for a variety of complicated conditions and he has always been able to help me regain my health and mobility. I give him my highest recommendation….” “After years of pain, I was resigned to the fact that I would have to live like this for life. Every morning I awakened with discomfort, especially aggravated when I tried to walk. After the first visit, my once chronic pain was gone and has not returned.” Dr. McCord is honored to be one of Tallahassee Woman Magazine’s “Men Who Mean Business.” www.allstressedup.com
special section WWMB Journal | April/May 2020 | 59
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS
o you care for a person that is hospitalized, disabled, elderly, or a victim of trauma? Do you take on too much? Caregivers that do not practice self-care may experience varying levels of mental, emotional and physical exhaustion. Without
CAREGIVER COMPASSION FATIGUE? PRACTICING MINDFULNESS AND SELF-CARE BY DR. MICHELLE A. MITCHAM, LMHC, NCC
effective coping strategies and self-care, caregivers may suffer from burnout and compassion fatigue. Individuals that work in healthcare and other helping professions may also experience compassion fatigue.
What are the signs of compassion fatigue? • Caregivers that help others to an extent that reaches the level of exhaustion, either mentally or physically. • An extreme state of tension and preoccupation with the suffering of those being helped to the degree that it can create a secondary traumatic stress for the helper. • A condition of feeling desensitized or disconnected from those you care for; emotional overflow caused by helping others in distress, trauma or serious life challenges. • Constant and overwhelming exposure to emotional stress caused by helping others.
Practicing Self-care and Mindfulness a timeout and developing a plan for POSITIVE SELF-AFFIRMATIONS Taking mindfulness and self-care is essential to combat (READ ALOUD 3-5 TIMES)
1. I DO ALL I CAN WITH WHAT I HAVE FROM WHERE I AM 2. EVERYDAY I ATTRACT ABUNDANCE, LOVE AND SUCCESS IN MY LIFE 3. I INSPIRE OTHERS TO DO THE SAME 4. I AM WORTHY OF LOVE, PEACE AND HAPPINESS 5. I EMBRACE THE HERE AND NOW, THE PRESENT 6. I CHOOSE HAPPINESS 7. I AM ENOUGH 8. I AM BLESSED – TOO BLESSED TO BE STRESSED 9. I AM WORTHY 10. I am
compassion fatigue. Clearing the mind of stress and worry is the first step to finding more inner peace. Some people practice yoga, exercise, go for long walks or meditate. Choose your preferred way to unwind and relax, no matter how simple. Remember, mindfulness is the multifaceted, present moment awareness of thoughts, feelings and senses for the purpose of better management of stressors. Some strategies for practicing mindfulness include breathing deeply, listening to your thoughts, cultivating insight, limiting reactivity, expressing gratitude and being peaceful. Practicing positive, daily self-affirmations may also foster a sense of peace. Try repeating positive self-affirmations or create your own.
tallahassee woman | 60 | april • may 2020
CALM AMONG THE CHAOS BY TAVIA RAHKI
he most recent corona virus has taken the global stage by a storm of contagion. The phases of this pandemic are described with several predictions, while research studies are few and far between. We have all been advised to take necessary precautions to ‘flatten the curve’, decreasing the rate of infection so that hospitals can properly support the number of patients seeking care. This can be achieved by social distancing and thorough hand washing. That can’t be too difficult, right? Everyone is on the same page with stricter hygiene, but social distancing seems to be the real hurdle. This quarantine affects everyone differently- For some, this is an extended spring break vacation with beach gatherings and impromptu flights. For others, this is stirring up deep panic as grocery store shelves empty and funds run low. During this unprecedented time, it’s easy to get swept up in media hysteria, but it is important to remember that you have control over how you react. Where focus goes, energy flows. Finding calm among the chaos can
QUIET CREATE NOURISH MOVE REST PLAY & LEARN
start with the following: Q U I E T the mind. Take a break from television, computers, phones. Find silence or relaxing music to settle into yourself. Create a space to pray, meditate, and breathe. C R E A T E your environment. Clean, organize, prioritize and use your imagination to cultivate a space at home that brings comfort and peace. Work on unfinished projects, express yourself through writing, reading art, music, dance, language, etc. N O U R I S H the body. During this quarantine, it’s likely you will have more processed food around than usual. While it may be tempting to binge on snacks, choose nutrient dense foods to nourish the body and stay full longer. Before eating, ask yourself, “Am I actually hungry, or am I bored?”. True satiety comes from nourishment found in fresh whole foods. If you feel like snack binging, get away from craving
triggers. Stay hydrated and practice mindful eating (slower paced, more chewing, observing taste, texture, and emotions before, during, and after eating). M O V E the body. Exercise comes in so many forms - find yours and set some time aside for it. One easy way to add fitness into your day is to do a different exercise on every break (study breaks, cleaning breaks, commercial breaks). Take the dog on extra-long walks and as you walk, focus on keeping your posture upright taking deep full breaths along the way. R E S T the mind and body by getting adequate sleep. Establishing a bedtime routine may include putting away electronic devices, avoiding large meals close to bedtime and self-care time. P L A Y & L E A R N for fun, with family, pets or solo. Play board games, card games, hide and seek, puzzles, video games etc. Listen to
tallahassee woman | 61 | april • may 2020
podcasts or educational channels and read for leisure. Keep in mind moderation and variety. ‘Quarantine Your Thoughts’An Affirmation
I am strength. I am patience. I am empathy. I am organized. I am aware. I am intelligent. I am productive. I am creative. I am full. I am using my time wisely with balanced intention. There is no light or darkness within or outside me that I cannot face. I accept that which is not in my control and will diligently tend to that which is in my control. With every breath and with every moment, I do my best to be present and stay grounded.
Inhale. Exhale. Repeat.
Wellness | MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS
EVERYTHING THAT YOU DO MATTERS BY GWENDOLYN SINGLETON, PH.D.
hen we think of our mothers, mother figures, or caregivers we typically think of someone who is loving, selfless, patient; a protector, provider, educator, advocate, problem solver, ...; they sacrifice their desires for loved ones. Mothers are blessed vessels responsible for carrying, nurturing, and delivering priceless gifts to the world. Rarely are mothers celebrated on their children’s birthdays, in honor of their roles in the delivery of such a precious gift. In most cases, mothers do not expect this honor and are not expected to be honored. Further, among mothers’ or caregivers’ expectations rarely is self-care listed as a priority. Motherhood and caregiving are important, high-stakes jobs – part of that responsibility is self-care. Care of the caregiver is vital to the family’s physical and mental well-being. Care of caregivers matters.
creativity to increase the joy of motherhood. Mothers and caregivers matter.
Mental health is the ABCs of wellness: Affective/emotional well-being, Behavioral well-being, and Cognitive wellbeing. It involves our feelings, behaviors, thoughts, and interactions. It impacts our ability to balance activities and challenges, and to enjoy life. Self-care is critical to mental health. Self-care is any intentional act to care for one’s emotional, mental, and physical well-being. This can include meditation, inspirational reading, self-knowledge, creating positive spaces, exercise, diet, sleep, or quality time with loved ones. Laugh with your family, play with them, honor and embrace your true self, and identify the joy in every activity; Appreciate and treasure every moment, and appreciate yourself. Self-care matters.
Mothers and caregivers, by all means, continue to love fully, care deeply, and pour your heart into family and loved ones. Just include self-care in the love equation. From my life lessons, I’ve learned that love generates love. The more love that you have in you, the more love that flows out of you. The circle of love will feel more complete if you are surrounded by love and also filled with love. Open your heart to love someone else who is so deserving of love— you. Challenge yourself every morning when you open your eyes and every evening before closing your eyes to say and mean “I love myself”. Love and self-care will set the tone for your day and your night. This will create opportunities for intentional self-care in the midst of doing what comes naturally, loving and caring for others. Self-love matters.
Imagine if mothers and caregivers were trained and expected to engage in self-care, exhibiting patience with themselves and unconditional love, serving as protector and nurturer of their mental and physical health; to act as advocate, provider and cheerleader to ensure that they are at their optimal caregiver-selves to support loved ones. Imagine that they are responsible for ensuring that, not only their children and loved ones, but themselves achieved peace, joy, and happiness; were fulfilled, motivated and excited about personal accomplishments and interests; to eat well, manage stress, and maintain balance; Holding sacred quiet moments, to still the mind, reflect, renew, and facilitate
I, and other mothers, view it an honor and privilege to be mothers and expect nothing in return but healthy, happy, and well-adjusted children. Recall a time that you said, “thank you” (unsolicited) to your mother or your child to you. It was likely a very emotional moment. Why? Often mothers, mother figures, and caregivers do what they feel and know needs and should be done, in spite of fatigue, sickness, or competing obligations. The joy is in the outcome, benefit to their child(ren) and family. Hearing “thank you”, especially unsolicited, is overwhelmingly heartwarming – it is a reflection of a beautiful outcome. Family matters.
Commit to do something every day to show yourself that you love yourself unconditionally. Embrace the joy of motherhood. Include self-care in the love equation. Everything that you do matters.
tallahassee woman | 62 | april • may 2020
Shop or donate to the Fix Thrift Shop
Every Gently Used Item sold at The Fix Thrift Shop funds Be The Solution
With Be The Solution, You Can Get an Affordable Spay/Neuter Voucher for Your Pet
Your Pet is Fixed for Life!
Support Be The Solution by Shopping or Donating to the Fix Thrift Shop 1208 Capital Circle SE, Unit D Tues. - Fri.11 am - 6 pm & Sat. 10 am - 6 pm 850.298.1129 BeTheSolution.us/TheFix
tallahassee woman | 63 | april • may 2020
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS
FOCUS ON THE FAMILY:
CREATIVITY AND CONNECTION DURING CORONAVIRUS
Michelle Mitcham, Ph.D., LMHC, NCC, CCMHC
ow are you adjusting to working from home and balancing, for many, a new role of being a homeschool mother or another caregiver? What about the precise, well-planned schedules the family was following for school, sports, dance, church and the list goes on? It seems as though our normal existence with face to face connection, in person, has turned to virtual in the blink of an eye. Offices and conference rooms have been replaced with Zoom, Skype, GoToMeeting, FaceTime and other virtual conferencing tools. A virtual world is the new norm, as we are mandated to social distancing. Juggling it all can be a daunting task. Wow, this is really a lot to wrap your head around – it is learning a new dance! We all know that learning a new way to do something, whether it is a new way of working or teaching, or especially with adapting to new Apps or technology, may be frustrating if you are not techsavvy. Cases of COVID-19 are on the rise and with this massive social shutdown of the way we live, work and play, life has been disrupted as we once knew. With abrupt changes, it is common to experience anxiety. We all know that based on our personality style, there are different ways to juggle our myriad work and
life commitments. Many people appreciate a schedule with a clear plan of action, down to the hour or the minute.
members to maintain connection (a perfect time to practice technology and making everything a learning opportunity)
What is your plan for working from home, teaching your children and balancing the family, following your self-care plan? What about other commitments of service to the community, church or extended family? This unexpected quarantine may be the perfect time to reflect and rethink the way we live and work – being creative in all that we do, while staying connected to work, family, friends and those we love. Above all, this is an ideal time to focus on the family.
• Cultivate critical thinking by child-led activities depending on their age
STRATEGIES FOR QUALITY TIME: • Create a flexible schedule for children to learn and play or depending on their age, involve them in the planning of the new schedule.
• Involve children in preparing dinner or snacks • Take time to discuss their questions and concerns • Have one on one time with each child to provide undivided attention and unconditional positive regard so they know they are heard. It is an important time for all family members to be seen and heard. • Play family games (board games, singing, dancing, Karaoke, puzzles). Let each family member take turns choosing the activity. • Go for a walk or bike ride together. Find a way to have fun and fitness.
• Cook together and practice reading, measuring and math.
• Make a schedule to limit screen time
• Take time out to eat outside on patio or go for a walk and discover nature
• Have a daily family meeting or check in to see how everyone is doing or feeling.
• Set up a wellness or arts activity in the yard, porch or dining room
• Make a family list of topics and concerns for discussion on a white board, chalkboard or poster board.
• Video conference with grandparents and family tallahassee woman | 64 | april • may 2020
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY From the Tallahassee Woman Magazine Team
Pictured from Left to Right Jessica Sorenson, Molly Lord, Suzannah Grasel, Tarsha Davis, and Callie Watson.
CONGRATULATIONS to these 6 high-achieving women to watch for being selected to the 2020 Knight Creative Communities Institute (KCCI) Community Catalyst class: Theresa Bender, Tarsha Davis, Suzannah Grasel, Molly Lord, Jessica Sorenson, and Callie Watson. This volunteer team will add a new community asset to Tallahassee by designing and implementing a community bicycle park, where citizens can learn about and practice bicycle safety. Visit KCCITallahassee.com for more information.
tallahassee woman | 65â&#x20AC;&#x201A;| april â&#x20AC;˘ may 2020
Indian Dishes To Make At Home BY THE TWM EDITORIAL TEAM
You don’t always have to travel the world to taste a new dish. Sometimes, it’s as simple as taking a look in your backyard.
1. Mix the Bisquick pancake mix and Carnation milk powder in one bowl.
of water and 2 cups sugar to a pot. Then, put the pot on the stove.
2. Add a pinch of cardamom powder and a couple drops of rose essence or rose water.
6. Then, add a pinch of saffron, 1/2 tsp. cardamom powder, and 1 teaspoon rose water. Let this boil until the sugar has melted.
1 cup Bisquick Pancake mix 3 cups Carnation milk powder 1 pint Heaving whipping cream 2 cups of water 2 cups of sugar
1/2 tsp. Cardamom powder Saffron 1 tsp. Rose water 2-3 cupsVegetable oil
3. Add the heavy whipping cream in small increments and combine the mixture. Make sure the dough is not too soft. 4. Roll the dough and make small balls gently. Then deep fry the small balls in vegetable oil.
I’ve been blessed to have experiences that have placed me in diverse and inclusive situations, and have allowed me to form valuable connections with others, especially within the Asian community here in Tallahassee. The friendships I’ve gained are still strong to this day! May is Asian and Pacific Islander Heritage Month, and what could be a more perfect way to celebrate than by trying something new?
7. After frying the small balls, put them in the sugar water and let them soak for 30 minutes to 1 hour. Then, serve hot or cold. Can serve with rose petals for decoration. Makes 25-30 balls.
5. To make sugar water, add 2 cups tallahassee woman | 66 | april • may 2020
2-3 eggs 1 tsp. Green Chili, ginger, garlic paste 1 yellow onion (diced) 1 big tomato (diced) 1/2 tsp. Red chili powder 1 tsp. Egg Bhurji masala 2 tsp. Vegetable oil/butter Salt Italian bread 1. Warm up 2 tsp. of vegetable oil or butter in a pot. Once warmed up, add diced yellow onion and 2-3 pinches of salt into the pot. Let the onions cook until they are soft and transparent. Stir every so often. 2. Once the onions are cooked, add the diced tomatoes, 1 tsp. of the green chili, ginger and garlic paste, about 1/2 tsp. of red chili powder, and 1 teaspoon of egg Bhurji masala. Stir every so often and let this cook down. 3. Crack the eggs in a separate bowl. Then, add the eggs to the pot and stir often to scramble the eggs. 4. Keep stirring until all the eggs have been scrambled and everything has been mixed together. 5. Then, butter the bread slices and cook both sides of the bread slices on a pan. 6. Serve the Egg Bhurji and bread hot. Serves for 1 person.
WE Insire Every time we choose courage, we make everyone around us a little better and the world a little braver and our world could stand to be a little kinder and braver. ~ Brene Brown May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Invite one to stay. ~Maya Angelou “What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson tallahassee woman | 67 | april • may 2020
Ben J. Kirbo, M.D. Laurence Z. Rosenberg, M.D. Chris DeRosier, M.D. CERTIFIED BY THE AMERICAN BOARD OF PLASTIC SURGERY
more snuggling. less worrying. thanks ER.
Text ER to 32222 for average ER wait times. Message and data rates may apply. For more information, visit TextERHelp.com