Tableau Magazine May/June 2021

TABLEAU

M AY / J U N E 2 0 2 1 I SSUE

F R O M K I TC H E N TA B L E M A R K E T I N G

SUMMER SIPS WONDER WOMEN SAVE THE DATES

THE WHAT’S NEXT ISSUE:

HOME DECOR, DELICIOUS DISHES + ICE BATHS Photo by Isabelle Tobin @isabelleemilytobin

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Welcome to the May/June issue of Tableau!

The theme of this edition is What’s Next and, while we don’t have a crystal ball, we’ve done our best to capture what we think is next in Orange County and beyond. Think new restaurants and shops, fresh cocktails and mock-tails for sipping, the latest home design trends and products, timely ways to give back to local nonprofits and — since things are about to heat up for summer — DIY ice baths!

One thing I do know is definitely next — as in a huge next step for this start-up magazine — is our brand-new website at tableauofficial.com! It’s beautiful, bold, so easy to navigate and full of wonderful stories and ideas for you to enjoy and share. Please check it out and let us know what you think — and be sure to sign up for a free subscription so you’ll be the first to get our new issues and other updates. Many thanks to our web designer Lee Vujnovich of coopdesignhouse.com for making our digital dreams come true!

Another exciting thing about this issue is the fact that — from cover to cover — it represents a labor of love by a team of talented women, including our 18 year-old photographer, Isabelle Tobin, whose work is seen on our cover and at her Instagram @isabelleemilytobin.

In addition to our multigenerational team of contributors and editors, we have had the honor and privilege of getting to know — and feature in this edition — incredible women who are making a difference in our region and beyond: • Noted author, podcaster, therapist and parenting expert Kristen Howerton speaks on family and race • Accomplished appellate lawyer, publisher and author M.C. Sungaila weighs in on a mother’s wisdom • Successful entrepreneur Crystal Schachter of Studio C Florals talks about how her business not only survived the pandemic, but bloomed beyond her wildest imagination When say this issue is a true celebration of inspiration from cover to cover, I do mean that. We’re thrilled to feature the work of America Martin on our back cover. I’ve been a huge fan of America’s for years and it’s a dream come true to feature an image of her painting, Two Women Walk and One Gathers Flowers in this issue. Be sure to check out America’s work at JoAnne Artman Gallery in Laguna Beach and online at joanneartmangallery.com.

Here’s to what’s next,

Carrie Freitas carrie@kitchentablepr.com  @tableauofficial  @tableauoc

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[ CONTENTS ]

MAY/JUNE 2021

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The Contributors

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Mom + Pop

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Take Note

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To Order

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By Design

28

Of Interest

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At Work

31

Give Back

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Self Care

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First Person

Photos courtesy of Sheiso, Design Within Reachw, Crystal Schachter, and The 908

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OUR C O NTRI BUTO RS Elisabeth Abrahamson OC native Elisabeth Abrahamson enjoys writing about her beloved hometown. When she’s not creating content, she spends her time traveling (Palm Springs is a local fave!), discovering the best new brunch spots with friends, and watching The Office with her fiancé, Doug.

Sara Hall Sara has nearly 14 years of experience at several daily and weekly newspapers, including The Record Searchlight in Redding, The Daily Advocate in Greenville, Ohio, the Newport Beach Independent, and most recently at Stu News Newport and Stu News Laguna. Her work has included photography, writing, design and layout. In her free time, she enjoys hiking, backpacking, traveling, and spending time with her husband and pets.

Alyssa Swanson Hamilton Alyssa is a lifelong Southern California resident. She has been writing professionally for over 20 years, primarily for health websites and magazines. She is an MFA candidate at Sierra Nevada University and is currently working on a novel. She enjoys permaculture, tending her meadow garden, basking in freezing water wherever she can find it, and spending time in the desert under the stars. She lives in Newport Beach with her two teenage sons and a black Lab named Bear.

Robin Hoik Phillips A born and bred East Coaster, Robin moved with her husband, two teenagers, and two dachshunds to Newport Beach last summer and is really enjoying the weather and the laidback SoCal lifestyle. Robin was most recently the editor of Fairfield Magazine, a popular luxury lifestyle magazine in Connecticut. Prior to that she worked at New York publisher Conde Nast on such titles as House & Garden Magazine and Bon Appetit. In addition to contributing to Tableau, Robin is also a writer for Venu Magazine, and a copywriter/editor for several small business websites. Check out robinedits.com to learn more about her and her work.

Sarah Mosqueda Sarah Mosqueda has worked as a freelance journalist in OC and LA for a decade. Her work has appeared in Orange Coast Magazine, Coast Magazine, Hispanic Network Magazine and Bon Appetit Magazine. She is an avid podcast listener, amateur yogi and skilled bartender who enjoys trying new restaurants and cooking at home with her fiancé.

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Michelle Pulfrey For more than two decades, Michelle Pulfrey has shaped SoCal’s TV news landscape as a senior producer for Fox 11’s “Good Day L.A.” Always on the pulse of what’s new and noteworthy, Michelle also produced the station’s popular “Style File” segment and has written on fashion, beauty and lifestyle for Modern Luxury OC/Riviera. Now, this OC resident brings her talents to Tableau.

Amy Senk Amy is a CDM resident and a graduate of the Missouri School of Journalism. She has worked at the Kansas City Times, Kansas City Star, Contra Costa Times, Coast Kids and Coast Magazines, and is a regular contributor to StuNews Newport. A recent empty nester, she spends her free time with her husband and planning elaborate imaginary vacations.

Jenn Tanaka Jenn Tanaka is a SoCal native. She studied under Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Barry Siegel at UC Irvine and was one of the school’s first Literary Journalism graduates. After moving to New York, Jenn worked at Food & Wine magazine and went on to develop the epicurean category at The New Yorker. In 2010, Jenn graduated from the Institute of Culinary Education in Manhattan and went on to cook at Dovetail, which earned a Michelin star during her tenure.

After leaving the kitchen, Jenn helped Ruth Reichl curate the food-centric website, GiltTaste

by Gilt Groupe. Currently, Jenn lives in Orange County with her family. She writes about food, fashion, cocktails, and travel. Follow her adventures on Instagram.com/jenn.tanaka/ Isabelle Tobin Isabelle is a lifestyle photographer and student based in Southern California. She spent her childhood in Australia and upon moving to California in her early teens, she enjoyed spending time on the California coast. She developed a passion for photographing the outdoors. For the last five years, she has been a competitive rower for the Newport Aquatic Center women’s crew and will continue rowing for Southern Methodist University in the fall.

See her work on Instagram at @isabelleemilytobin

TA B L E AU STA F F AKA The Kitchen Table Marketing Team Carrie Freitas, Editor-in-Chief + Publisher

Becca Stonebraker

Miki Akil

Madelyn Sutherland

Jordan Kruk

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TA K E N OT E

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By Elisabeth Abrahamson

Dough Exchange We asked Jason Quinn, chef of downtown Santa Ana’s recently shuttered Playground, to tell us how he came up with his newest culinary adventure, a bagel shop called Dough Exchange. His response? “A 34-year-old self-loathing Jew’s favorite food plus pandemic boredom.” Quinn’s bagels aren’t your typical dough and schmear. Options range from the Missionary, a French toast bagel with egg soufflé, bacon, cultured butter, and maple syrup to K-Pop, a Goma Shio bagel with kimchi schmear, roasted turkey breast, chile garlic crunch, and pickled cucumbers. Quinn’s go-to order?

The Street Corn bagel. “I rip the jalapeno cheddar bagels and dip them into our esquites schmear, which has roasted corn, roasted jalapenos, lime zest, chile powder, and cilantro.” Did someone say new favorite brunch spot? Find more information @doughexchange on Instagram.

Photo credit courtesy of Dough Exchange, Heritage Barbecue, and Open Market OC

Heritage Barbecue Located in Historic San Juan Capistrano, Heritage Barbecue continues to wow meat eaters with its proteinpacked plates. Choose from citrus-marinated smoked chicken, pulled pork, smoked turkey breast, brisket, and prime beef ribs (on weekends only!). The sides are just as important and just as tasty. We like the Texas-style queso, chili, classic mac with smoked sausage, brisket beans, deviled egg potato salad, and banana bread pudding. Bring a few sides of the house-made bourbon barbecue sauce home because you’ll be kicking yourself if you don’t. Fair warning: You will most likely have to wait in line. Bring a book or game to keep busy, and maybe even a folding chair. Closed Mondays and Tuesdays. heritagecraftbbq.com.

Open Market OC With two Orange County locations (Main Place Mall in Santa Ana and Laguna Hills Mall in Laguna Hills) and with more than 200 vendors at each site, you’re bound to take home a treasure or two from Open Market OC. This pop-up-turned-permanent shopping experience features local and small business owners who specialize in fashion, art, beauty, vintage, handmade items, and even prepackaged food like sprinkle-covered Rice Krispie Treats and dark chocolate and peanut butter fudge. Shoppers can browse pampas grass and dried flowers from Hadley and Ren or vintage glassware and thrifted art from Good Buy James.

Open Market OC is open seven days a week. (949) 485-0322; openmarketoc.com.

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B.Yellowtail Bethany Yellowtail draws inspiration for her line B.Yellowtail from her upbringing in the Mighty Few District of the Crow Nation. Not only does she design incredibly beautiful pieces of her own (don’t miss the Sun-Centered Tee and the B.Yellowtail x Faherty Paloma Duster), she also sells a curated collection of jewelry, accessories, and handmade items from Native American and indigenous artists on her website, too. Yellowtail, who currently lives and designs in Los Angeles, also is an enrolled member of the Northern Cheyenne Nation. She believes in the importance of being an unapologetic voice of authenticity in a world where indigenous images are often stolen and misappropriated. byellowtail.com.

We’re Not Really Strangers Founder and CEO Koreen Odiney created We’re Not Really Strangers (also known as WNRS, pronounced “winners”) card game with the intention of empowering meaningful connections with others. The game features three carefully crafted levels of questions and wildcards, which allow players to deepen existing relationships and create new ones.

Before Odiney launched her successful card game, she photographed people on the streets of Los Angeles. Odiney always asked her subjects the same three questions: What’s your name, age, and passion? One day after a modeling gig, she photographed a man who told her “you’re going to write a book one day and it’s going to be called We’re Not Really Strangers.” One thing led to another and now the card game has its own Instagram page with more than 3.8 million followers. werenotreallystrangers.com.

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Photo credit courtesy of B.Yellowtail, We’re Not Really Strangers, Mess Hall, and Diaspora Co.

Mess Hall x The Frida Cinema Did you know that Tustin’s Mess Hall teamed up with Santa Ana’s non-profit theater The Frida Cinema to create monthly drive-in and dine-ins? This uber popular pop-up started as a Tuesdays-only special, but now screens movies eight plus days per month.

Before heading up to the parking structure rooftop— where you’ll watch the flicks—pick up a bite to eat from any of Mess Hall’s vendors. We love Big Parm, The Little Greek, Saigon Kitchen, The Sandwich Society, and Fowl Play. After you grab your grub, get ready to enjoy a family-friendly cult-classic or horrorthemed film from the comfort of your car. Check the website for an updated screening schedule. (714) 285-9422; thefridacinema.org.

Diaspora Co. Born and raised in postcolonial Mumbai—and working at the intersection of food and culture—Diaspora Co. founder and CEO Sana Javeri Kadri realized that farmers didn’t make a living and that spices coming out of these farms were flavorless and dull. Wanting to create change, Kadri spent 10 months in India, visiting countless farms to do her own research. Her vision was to create a radically new and equitable version of the spice trade, decolonizing a commodity back into a seasonal crop and a broken system into equal exchange. Support Diaspora Co.’s efforts by shopping spices such as Pragati Turmeric (zesty, floral, and unlike any turmeric you’ve ever had); Sivathei Chilies (fruity with fragrant notes of pineapple, maple, and guava—it’s also the seventh hottest chile in the world); and Kashmiri Saffron (notes of honey, jasmine, and almond). (510) 221-4090; diasporaco.com.

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BY DE SIG N

SUMMER SIZZLES WITH THE LATEST DESIGN TRENDS Hot Home Décor Inspo from SOCO

By Robin Hoik Phillips Who doesn’t look forward to summer? No matter your age, it’s the season of fun with friends and long, lazy days. It’s also the perfect time to reinvigorate your home décor and add some fresh energy and style to both your indoor and outdoor spaces. With so many cool pieces to choose from, we asked the experts at SOCO – Southern California’s top destination for home design inspiration – to share some of their hottest trends for summertime spruce-ups that will bring beauty to your home all year long.

BoConcept This May, BoConcept introduced two new designs. First up – The Porto Living Chair designed by Frans Schrofer, one of the leading Dutch furniture designers who is known for functional, beautiful, and ergonomic pieces. Also of note is the Princeton Barstool, designed by Morten Georgsen. It’s the perfect marriage of elegance and comfort.

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Photo credit courtesy of BoConcept, GATHER Home, Natuzzi, and Roche Bobois

GATHER Home The smooth creamy oak in GATHER Home’s Oak Round Extendable Dining Table and the Oak Pebble Dining Chair are nostalgic interpretations of the retro styles we all loved growing up. With soft lines and airy elements, these versatile pieces blend seamlessly with almost any design vibe — think Scandi, Japandi, or California fresh.

Natuzzi

Roche Bobois

The curvy lines of the Deep Sectional designed by Nika Zupanc are reminiscent of the ebb and flow of the tide. It’s a sofa you can really sink into, featuring Natuzzi’s Eucafeel high-density foam. Don’t miss the Ombra Table – a true work of art – melding natural and industrial materials to make a sculptural statement.

The Roche Bobois spring/summer collection presents a wide range of designs, some of which are truly revolutionary in both form and function. The shape of the Corail Dining Table – made from 3-D printed concrete on a steel base – evokes reef coral colonies and giant baroque shells. Inspired by the beauty of natural imperfection, it gives the feeling of bringing nature inside. The Coiffe Armchair, designed by Stephen Burk and crafted in Europe, is upholstered in Orsetto Flex fabric and features a back with two positions.

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PIRCH Many of the items featured at PIRCH are proudly made in Southern California. This can of course be a huge advantage for customers looking for not only the best quality and style for their projects, but also hoping for the benefit of local availability and the reduction in carbon footprint. We love Huntington Beach-based California Faucets’ handcrafted designs for kitchen, bath, and shower, available in a variety of finishes. And, perfect for year-round grilling, DCS Grills (founded in HB and made in Anaheim) has joined the Fisher & Paykel family. With a lifetime guarantee, their products are designed to be ultra-efficient, producing less waste.

Design Within Reach

Modani

From the artistic genius of Modernist French designer Pierre Paulin, the Pacha Chair features a rounded organic profile set on a slim metal base, creating a lowslung profile for easy, laid-back lounging. The Karimoku Case Study Chair and Table from Danish designers Norm Architects blends design philosophies from Japan and Denmark. Made by one of Japan’s leading manufacturers of wooden furniture, Karimoku is inspired by the branches of a tree, with the chair featuring a curved backrest and woven paper cord seat.

Nothing brightens up a space better than a pop of bright, sunny yellow, like the one found in the Oleo Ottoman. Crafted out of sturdy wood and fitted with soft yet durable fabric, the Oleo’s two tan handles offer mobility and versatility. Looking for the ultimate decor conversation piece?

You’ll love Modani’s Saut de L’ange Sculpture. Available in sleek black or brilliant silver, this modern rendition of the angel’s leap will add magic to any home office or living space.

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Photo credit courtesy of PIRCH, Design Within Reach, Modani, Nest Bedding, and TFS Natural Home

Nest Bedding With hot summer months just around the corner, pick up Nest Bedding’s luxurious Cooling Bamboo Sheets.

They’re lighter and vvvsofter than traditional cotton and possess superior moisture-wicking properties that help create deeper sleep with the ultimate temperature control. https://www.nestbedding.com/products/bamboosheets

TFS Natural Home TFS Natural Home at SOCO is showcasing its new NBJ Modular Seating which is totally customizable and made from 100 percent natural materials with no petrochemicals, fire retardants, or harmful toxic finishes. The sleek, low-profile frame is matched with an uber-comfy cloud-like seat, made of latex and wool, to create its statementmaking structure.

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AT WORK A Business in Bloom — Studio C Florals

By Carrie Freitas Step into Studio C Florals — virtually (on their website) or in person (at Newport Beach’s darling Pelican Courtyard shops) — and you’ll feel as if you’ve stumbled upon one of Orange County’s most beautiful, best-kept secrets.

Designed and curated by the talented, tasteful and nature-loving eye of founder and owner Crystal Schachter, the lifestyle/gift shop and floral design studio is a delight for all of the senses. Brides-to-be and top wedding planners throughout Southern California rely on Crystal to create the most dazzling, memorable and photogenic floral designs for their big days. Thoughtful friends and family call her to send stunning and meaningful flower arrangements for special occasions or “just because.” Savvy shoppers looking for just-right gifts to give (or to keep!) love to stop by this sweet jewel-box shop to purchase everything from Rifle Paper stationery and Sloane teas, to sweets from Sugarfina, scents from dossier, candles, books and more.

You would never guess from the bright smile on Crystal’s face and the cheerful vibe of the shop that this business had not only survived a pandemic, but had, in fact, blossomed over the past year.

“I’m so thankful and proud to have weathered the storm,” says Crystal. “Thanks to the support of the community, Studio C grew from one business to two businesses in 2020.”

Crystal launched her floral design business in 2014, as a married mom of two who — while working as an accountant — attended night school for floral design and then apprenticed with another designer to hone her talents. In no

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Photos courtesy of Crystal Schachter

“The messages people wanted written on the cards for the arrangements brought tears to my eyes,” she says. “I was so happy to be part of that connection and expression of love. People really seemed to be communicating in a new way, through flowers.”

And business at Studio C Florals continues to bloom now that the wedding world is opening up again — Crystal has 20 weddings on the books from now through year’s end, a bumper crop, even by prepandemic standards.

“I’m so excited to see brides being able to have their weddings — and all of the special moments they bring — after this long haul,” she says. time, she became a go-to for the most bespoke and breathtaking proposal, wedding and event florals in the area.

Cue the next six years’ fast-forward montage of weddings and events from Santa Barbara (Schachter’s hometown) to San Diego and from Newport Beach to Temecula. Until Mid-March 2020 arrived.

And the “just because” flower arrangement orders continue to roll in, thanks to referrals from happy clients, including Jessica Alba. Studio C Florals also anticipates another record-breaking Mother’s Day, so get those orders in now.

“At first, we got calls from brides and planners delaying weddings by a couple of months,” said Crystal. “And then everything just stopped.”

Or so it seemed. The week the official pandemic shutdown was announced in Orange County, Crystal drove to the nearest flower wholesaler and bought a carload of blooms.

“I felt so badly for them — not only the loss of money but also the beautiful flowers going to waste,” she says.

She took the blossoms and created arrangements for friends in her close-knit Costa Mesa neighborhood, who would leave goodies on each other’s porches — a plateful of chocolate chip cookies here, a homebaked sourdough loaf there. Little did she know that this chain of connection and giving would spark a new business. It wasn’t long before news of Crystal’s beautiful flower arrangements — not just for weddings anymore! — spread.

Crystal started to get calls from people locally and from across the country wanting flowers delivered to friends and family in Orange County. In order to jump start a floral delivery business, she had to quickly source local flower farms as all of the flower markets had closed.

Once the Mother’s Day orders are out, you’re likely to find Crystal enjoying her own celebration with husband Ryan, a teacher and head basketball coach at Corona Del Mar High School in Newport Beach, and with her 16 year-old daughter and 10 year-old son.

They’ll spend the day in nature, enjoying some time outdoors at the beach or a local park, taking time to connect and have fun.

“Nature and connection are so important to me and my work is a combination of those things,” says Crystal, “I want people to appreciate the beauty of nature and feel connected to each other and to their communities through my work.” studiocflorals.com | @studiocflorals | @shopstudiocflorals

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S E LF CARE OC BEAUTY BRANDS DELIVER SUMMER SKIN ESSENTIALS

By Michelle Pulfrey

Detox: The Tox OC The brand-new Tox OC is the hottest spot in town to detox. The specialty lymphatic draining massage is aimed to heal your body from the inside out. The treatment focuses on the circulatory, digestive, and respiratory areas, as well as moving fluid out, improving full body function. The Master Tox is offered in 60- or 90-minute appointments depending on how much sculpting you’re looking for in certain areas. The face sculpt is a popular request, toning the muscles of the face for a flushed, fresh-face glow. | The Tox OC, 188 Broadway, Costa Mesa

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Photo credit courtesy of The Tox OC, The Route, Seiso, and Botanika Life

All-Natural Approach: Botanika Life Botanika Life is a holistic, full-spectrum CBD skincare brand from OC power couple Benny and Stacy Sabtai using 100% hemp organically grown in the U.S. Their three skin-glowing greats are packed with Vitamin C, grape seed oil, plant stem cells, and marula. The hero products are now available in the Skin Elixir Set, for an all-day glow as you brighten and firm.

Glow: The Route Party Peel If you’re looking for an at-home, medical-grade skin peel that delivers glowing results, check out Newport Beach-based The Route. The skincare line was created by Nurse Nancy Pellegrino and her best friend and marketing whiz Cortney Baber with efficient, science-based skin care ingredients previously only available at doctors’ offices. The golden glow you’ll get from the now Insta-famous “Party Peel” is immediately noticeable. Its illuminating golden serum is packed with gentle acids and their unique oxygen delivery system creates bubbles, getting the job done without visible peeling. The Route products are all certified PETA cruelty-free and vegan. | theroutebeauty.com or Ulta stores

Stimulate the serums with a crystal face roller to massage all of the oils deep into the dermis. Pro tip: Stacey recommends keeping the face roller in the refrigerator. Botanika Life is all-natural, gluten-free, vegan + cruelty-free, sulfate-free, paraben-free, nonGMO, sustainable, and Made in the USA. Botanika.Lifev

Cleanse: Seiso Desire dewy skin? Costa Mesa native and beauty industry leader Tracy O’Connor Meyer dreamt of a skincare line with a less-is-more approach, and her Seiso line is just that. Based on Japan’s 5s Philosophy, her “clean, tidy, and elegant” line offers the four products she desired as a busy mom. Perfect for sensitive skin, the foaming cleanser leaves your face feeling squeaky clean and smooth as silk, and the revolutionary ceramide is the key to healthy skin. | Seisojbeauty.com

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M OM + POP EXPLORING THE MEANING OF MOTHERHOOD WITH KRISTEN HOWERTON

By Amy Senk I knew a lot about Kristen Howerton before I ever set up our interview. How could I not? The Costa Mesa-based family therapist, writer and activist has been popping up everywhere. There she is on Fresh Air on NPR, there’s her opinion piece in The New York Times. She blogs about her divorce, about her children, about her life. She’s published a book, Rage Against the Minivan, which came out last summer.

Most articles and interviews with Kristen begin with how she became a mother of four children, who now range in age from 11-16 years old. She decided to adopt after several miscarriages, and her first child was a six-month-old who had been in foster care. Later, she adopted an infant from a Haitian orphanage who was three years old by the time details were final. And there’s a whole story about being in Haiti for the adoption when a 7.0 earthquake struck, forcing her to leave her son behind and fly home via military plane. When she’d given up hope of having biological children, she gave birth to two daughters.

Family life means something different to each of us, but for Kristen, it’s a complicated combination of work, parenting, self-employment and creativity (She makes time for social media pet projects like “Pinterest, You Are Drunk”). Add in a global pandemic and hybrid schooling, a heaping layer of national racial tension and the spotlight on the Black Lives Matter movement when you’re a white mom rearing Black teenagers— and you may begin to understand the wild ride that is Kristen Howerton’s life.

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Photo credit courtesy of Kristen Howerton

The pandemic lockdown, she said, affected all families, throwing them into chaos and putting more pressure than ever on moms. And if you’re feeling guilt because you weren’t completely content, bundled up in a Little House in the Big Woods sort of way — stop.

“It’s not a life sentence if we’ve made a mistake,” she said. “It informs us, and it pushes us to be better next time.”

“Even in cultures or time periods when there was a lot of family time, there was still a lot going on outside the house,” Kristen said. “People would be working or going out. I don’t think we’re really built for this. We need time away from others to recharge and refuel, and when we’re operating on a deficit, which I think most of us are right now, our patience is lower.”

“Connection and empathy,” she said. “That’s it.

Everything else on top of that is extra. If you have connection with your children, where they really feel loved, and if you have empathy so that they really feel heard and understood, that’s the foundation of all of it.”

Her family, she said, did make time to attend Black Lives Matter protests (in masks) last spring. But that wasn’t a token nod to having a racially blended family.

“Even though my family is built through adoption and is multiracial, as a mom, I’m still dealing with all the same things that every other mom is dealing with,” said Kristen. “We’re dealing with motivation to finish homework and figuring out what sports we’re going to play and getting them to clean their rooms. We do have these additional issues of being a multiracial family on top of that, but I think my general experience is pretty relatable to most other moms.”

With this, I feel as if she’s given me permission to ask any question, to go beyond the topics of adoption or race. As a fairly recent empty nester, here’s my chance to ask a true expert about some of my nagging concerns: regrets, relationships with adult children, how to create lifelong meaningful connections.

“I don’t think it’s possible to parent without regrets,” Kristen said. “I think a life that is devoid of regrets is a life that is not being reflected upon. All of us are human, and all of us are fallible. I almost feel like, as parents, we need to be constantly evaluating ourselves, just like we would in any other avenue of our lives.”

Don’t berate yourself, she said, but look at yourself with grace and insight. Let yourself say, “I could have handled that better,” or “I’d like to show more empathy the next time something like this happens.”

According to Kristen, it’s never too late to think of parenting as a ground-up process.

Another huge part of parenting is to figure out how to rear children who will become connected adults.

“We want to be raising kids who are going to be relationally whole,” she said. “That starts in the family.

We can’t raise kids who are not connected to us who will then go on and be connected to their spouses and their children.”

Resist the urge to obsess about what your kids will become, which college they will attend, what sport they will excel in.

“We don’t know who our kids are going to become — we don’t,” she said. “If we can maintain a posture of curiosity and discovery about our children, it’s much better for them, and it’s much better for us.”

And, because PTA meetings and Little League games and birthday parties ultimately wind down, parents — particularly mothers who have put careers on hold — should also consider their futures.

“In the same way that we are raising our kids to slowly build their independence from us and launch, we also have to be working on ourselves so we’re also ready to launch into our new phase,” she said. “My biggest fear would be to get to that finish line, so to speak, that youngest child’s graduation, and to then look inward and think — I don’t know who I am. What that looks like for me is making sure that I’m creating space for myself, that I’m not just completely wrapped up in only mothering. And I am excited. Because I have aspirations and dreams that go beyond just being a mom.”

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TO ORD ER Cheers!

Springtime cocktails and mocktails bloom with flavor

By Jenn Tanaka Southern California’s warm weather and coastal breezes create an ideal atmosphere for alfresco dining. Locales such as Long Beach Exchange in East Long Beach and SOCO and The OC Mix in Costa Mesa offer a wide array of choices for discerning palates. At these eateries, the cocktail menus are equally focused on ingredients. The resident mixologists seek out locally sourced produce and elevate the cocktails with a gourmand’s take and a playful nod to the classics. For smooth summer sipping, taste these refreshing concoctions.

Chamango! (mocktail) Are you seeking a refreshing beverage without alcohol? Try Tastea at Long Beach Exchange.

The blended Chamango slushy is an ideal mocktail. The summer-inspired beverage evokes memories of hot summer days and quaint little fruit carts. Prepared with mango and a kick of cayenne powder, the beverage is finished with a drizzle of Chamoy and a sprinkling of Tajin.

It’s a celebration of Mexi-Cali flavors. | gotastea.com

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Photo credit courtesy of Tastea, ARC Food & Libations, 908 Restaurant, Taco María, and Greenleaf Chop Shop

Taco María’s Michelada

ARC’s Pimm’s Cup At ARC Food & Libations at SOCO in Costa Mesa, the herbaceous Pimm’s Cup is mixed right. Chef Noah von Blöm and his wife Marin have always curated an impressive cocktail program. The summer drinks at ARC feature hand-cut garnishes such as cucumber ribbons. These flourishes add to the presentation of ARC’s bubbly Pimm’s Cup, which bursts with notes of lemon and ginger. It sips smoothly and is ideal after a day of shopping the stunning design showrooms at SOCO. | www.arcrestaurant.com

Taco María at The OC Mix in Costa Mesa elevates the traditional michelada with a housemade guajillo chile base. A splash of fresh-squeezed lime juice and black lava salt create a dynamic blend of flavors -salty, sour, sweet. This spicy Mexican-style cocktail is topped with Cerveceria Colima’s Colimita lager for a crisp finish.

If you prefer imbibing at home, Taco Maria currently offers michelada kits for takeout. www.tacomaria.com

House Bloody Mary

Aloe-mitos Bay Located at Long Beach Exchange, 908 Restaurant proudly boasts its LBC love. The summer cocktail menu includes nods to SoCal neighborhoods. The Aloe-mitos Bay combines Ketel One Botanical Cucumber vodka with fresh mint, lime and aloe juice. It’s a refreshing take on a vodka mojito with a Long Beach twist. www.the908restaurant.com

Greenleaf Chop Shop at SOCO elevates the dining experience by educating its guests about ingredients. The cocktails at Greenleaf are made with sabe, a fermented alcohol produced in a similar manner to wine and beer. The cocktail menu reinvents the classics with an updated Southern California flair. Think: spicy chilies, lemongrass and organic fruit. The House Bloody Mary combines sabe with a spicy organic tomato base. Garnished with candied bacon, blue cheese, olives, and housemade pickles, this House Bloody Mary hits the spot. www.greenleafchopshop.com

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N EW F OODI E FI NDS + FLAVOR S IT ’S F IN A L LY T I ME TO D I N E O U T A N D E N JOY N E W E AT E R I E S A N D O F FE R I N G S

By Sarah Mosqueda After more than a year of ordering in and cooking at home, you might be experiencing a bit of burn out. Thankfully, the weather is warming up and restrictions are being relaxed. We can’t think of a better time to dine out. So ditch your sourdough starter and TikTok pasta because there is only one thing you should be making this season and that’s dinner (or breakfast or lunch) plans!

Start pleasing our palate with the new places and menu offerings below.

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Photo credit courtesy of Bird Talk and Modern Filipino Kitchen

Pinoy Power Modern Filipino Kitchen by Aysee started serving Filipino soul food in Anaheim in 2017. Now Chef Henry Pineda brings the flavors of the Philippines to SteelCraft Bellflower. Choose from rice bowls or combination plates with entree choices like crispy sisig (minced pieces of crispy pork served with Thai chilis and lemon aioli) or bistek tagalog (beef steak marinated in citrus, soy sauce and onion.) And of course, there is Adobo.

Regarded as the signature dish of the Philippines, every family has their own traditional version of adobo.

Modern Filipino Kitchen channels authentic flavors in this dish of chicken or pork braised in vinegar, garlic and soy sauce. Chef’s bold approach to Filipino food is sure to make it a favorite. Modern Filipino Kitchen by Aysee is open at SteelCraft Bellflower Tuesday through Thursday from 11am-8pm, Friday and Saturday 11am-9pm and Sundays 11am-8pm. mfkaysee.com

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Super Bloom It turns out florals for spring aren’t limited to the garden. Portola Coffee Roasters at The OC Mix in Costa Mesa and The Hangar at Long Beach Exchange in Long Beach is bringing the bloom with their new spring menu. Crafted to evoke all your favorite memories of spring from blooming flowers to buzzing bees, seasonal sips include the Lavender Vanilla Latte and Honey Bee Latte. We’re partial to the Rose Orgeat Latte, with house made Orgeat, rose, espresso, milk and topped with rose petals and the Jasmine Butterfly Milk Tea with house-made jasmine syrup, butterfly pea flower cold brew tea and milk. Portola Coffee Roasters at The OC Mix brews from 7am-5pm Monday-Saturday and 8am-5pm on Sundays. Portola at The Hangar at Long Beach Exchange is open SundaySaturday from 8am-5pm. portolacoffee.com

Slice, Slice Baby Pizza Playa is a brand-new artisanal pizzeria concept open at SteelCraft Bellflower. Founded by Long Beach residents Marci and Christopher Gentzkow and inspired by California beaches, the couple is bringing quality craft pizza to SoCal. Pizza Playa offers two distinct pizza styles. Choose from Detroit-style pizza, which is baked in square steel pans for a thick crust with crispy cheesy corners, or New York-style pizza, with hand-tossed thin crust making for wide foldable slices. All of their pizzas are fired in a state-of-the-art PizzaMaster oven and made with the best produce and ingredients California has to offer. Consider Pizza Playa your new Pie or Die. @playabellflower

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Photo credit courtesy of Portola Coffee Roasters, Pizza Playa, Bird Talk, and La Taqueria Brand

Bird is the Word If you want to talk SoCal’s best chicken, think Bird Talk. SteelCraft welcomes the chicken aficionado to their Garden Grove location with a menu that includes chicken sandos, buttermilk waffles, tenders, wings and loaded tots. Try The Original, their take on a classic fried chicken sandwich with crispy fried chicken breast, buttermilk ranch mayo, coleslaw and crispy kosher pickles. Or The Grilled Bird with grilled chicken breast stacked with avocado, lettuce, tomatoes, applewood smoked bacon and mayo. If you’re looking for heat, try The Spicy or The Nashville. We can’t get enough of the Honey Butter, though. A fried chicken breast gets dipped in B.B.B. signature honey butter sauce, with lettuce and mayo for a sweet and simple sando. Bird Talk at SteelCraft Garden Grove is serving Sunday through Saturday from 12pm-8pm. birdtalkchicken.com

Sauce Boss Every ranch in Mexico has its own distinct mark, the brand (la marca), they stamp on their cattle. At La Taqueria Brand, burritos, tortas, quesadillas and tortillas are branded with the LT brand, so you know it’s a legit La Taqueria Brand creation. This neighborhood taqueria concept makes timeless classics, like Tijuana tacos, and trending new favorites, like their birria beef dip sandwich. They even offer vegan options like vegan picadillo, vegan pastor and vegan chorizo. Whatever you order, don’t forget to hit the salsa bar for a variety of complimentary homemade salsas. Ranging from mild to habanero, their guacamole salsa, tomatillo salsa and signature birria salsa give you an excuse to get saucy. LT Brand is open at SteelCraft Long Beach Sunday through Thursday from 11am-9pm and Friday through Saturday from 10am-10pm. brandlataqueria.com

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OF I NTEREST LOCA L AU T H O R , ATTORNEY S HARES DAILY M E S SAG E S O F M OTHERLY WIS DOM

By Sara Hall

As the saying goes, “Mom knows best,” and one local attorney and author agrees wholeheartedly.

M.C. Sungaila of Newport Beach created two books from the daily wisdom her own mother, Jane, sent her in handwritten letters (and later in text messages) over the last quarter of a century. The book series, Mother’s Thoughts for Day: Twenty-Five Years of Wisdom, aims to strengthen family bonds and inspire readers.

“My mom has one child and she can only share (her wisdom) with me, but together, we can share it with a lot of others and pay it forward,” Sungaila said during a recent phone interview with Tableau.

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Photos courtesy of M.C. Sungaila

“(The notes) would encourage me to keep moving forward,” Sungaila said. “One of the real special talents that my mother has … she says the right thing, at the right time for that specific person to get over a tough spot.”

As technology advanced over the years, so did her mother’s notes. She started sending her daily text messages.

Sungaila’s career also advanced and she felt more confident as she became an accomplished appellate lawyer. Even as she garnered accolades and took on big, noteworthy cases, her mother still sent the messages and they were still nice to receive.

Reflecting on her mother’s advice over the years and how much it meant to her, Sungaila was inspired to share the wisdom with others.

In March, Sungaila released an all-new companion journal that will accompany the books. The new personalized and guided journal will give mothers (or any parent, grandparent, or loved one with knowledge to share) an opportunity to create their own collection of loving wisdom for the next generation. Mother’s Thoughts also now also has related merchandise, including pillows, mugs, and tote bags, featuring some of the quotes.

The books were also a way for Sungaila to show her mother how much her support and encouraging words have meant to her over the years.

When Sungaila started her professional career, her mother would send her handwritten letters every day at work, usually an inspirational quote or a pep talk of some sort.

“I thought these were helpful for me, so maybe they would be helpful for others as well,” Sungaila said.

“This is a nice way to pay it forward, from my family, my mom and me, to other young women.”

When she first had the idea of putting together the most universally helpful quotes or advice into a book, her mother was not on board. She felt that she’d written those messages for her daughter, nobody else. But after Sungaila read a few of her mother’s own messages back to her, she started to come around to the idea, realizing others might also find support in her words.

Just the fact that Sungaila had the idea to create a book from her messages showed her mother how important those words were to her.

The letters came by “snail mail” along with the business mail each day at her office. Each message was on stationery with “Mother’s Thoughts for the Day” emblazoned across the top and a positive quote or inspiring observation.

As a young woman in a new and demanding career, it was a challenge to succeed in a big firm. There were a lot of stumbling blocks in the early years, and that’s when her mother’s messages were the most impactful, she said. On the tough days, her mother’s words inspired and supported her in just the right way.

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education program, and both books have benefitted Sir Bruno Serato’s Caterina’s Club.

After more than 25 years’ worth of messages, the two books only cover about 35 to 40 percent of all her mother’s notes. Currently, she doesn’t have plans for another book, but a year ago she didn’t have plans for a journal or merchandise, so she’s not completely closing the door to the idea.

“I feel like the series has reached its conclusion with two books and journal,” Sungaila said. “But I don’t want to say never.”

A favorite quote from her mother is: “Every day is a new canvas, paint it the way you want.”

“I like it because it’s a reminder to not get caught up in what others are doing or where others are trying to lead you,” Sungaila said. “They are painting their own picture … Pick up the paintbrush and do what you want, don’t get painted in another direction.”

“As parents or friends, we do things and don’t realize how impactful they are,” Sungaila said.

While it was Sungaila’s project, she shared editorial thoughts with her mother and they would review things together.

“It was kind of a joint venture, I wanted her involved,” Sungaila said. “It was fun to do that together.”

Although some messages were “lost to history,” Sungaila had copied or kept a number of the letters and texts over the years. Choosing the most universally helpful messages, Sungaila compiled the first book, published in 2019. It was so popular that she compiled a second book, published in 2020.

Although she’s usually very analytical, publishing the book was more about intuition. She felt like it needed to be shared with others, hopefully encouraging other young professional women.

“The world needed something positive, given everything going on the last few years,” Sungaila said. “I wanted to release it into the world and see what happened.”

In another way of paying it forward, the books have benefited local nonprofits. A portion of the sales of the first book supported the Pacific Symphony’s arts

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Photos courtesy of M.C. Sungaila

Her mother, also a Newport Beach resident, still sends her messages, but not as regularly, Sungaila said. The encouraging messages and supportive advice are helpful at any age. The key lesson is to find the strength to overcome obstacles and strive to achieve your dreams, whatever they may be at any stage in life.

“Keep going, one step after another, and you’ll find you’ve gone pretty far,” Sungaila said.

Learn more and buy the books and journal at mothersthoughtsfortheday.com

G IVE BACK

SAVE THESE DATES — AND MAKE A DATE — TO SUPPORT LOCAL CHARITIES IN FUN AND MEANINGFUL WAYS IN MAY AND JUNE.

By Tableau Staff

Shop South County Outreach’s All-New Upscale Resale Thrift Store

Monday — Friday 11am-5pm, Saturday 10am-4pm, Sunday 10am-3pm South County Outreach’s Upscale Resale Thrift Store’s new location at 23461 Ridge Route Dr., Suite D in Laguna Hills offers more room and inventory than ever before. Shop clothes, home goods, furniture, and much more to support the programs of South County Outreach that fight to end hunger and homelessness in Orange County. Also, consider donating your gently-used items or volunteering at the shop. Visit sco-oc.org for more information.

Photos courtesy of South County Outreach

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Miracles for Kids’ Kindness Box of Miracles

May 17, 19 and 22 Help Miracles for Kids spread joy to critically-ill children and their families through the Kindness Box of Miracles program. This May’s theme is Sunshine Box and each box will be filled with essential items and seasonal goodies to remind the children that Miracles for Kids serves that they are never alone. You can get involved by donating items like sunscreen, water balloons, sidewalk chalk, face paint kits, sunglasses and Chapstick, or by volunteering to help assemble and/or deliver boxes to these children and families in need. Please drop off all donations by Monday, May 17 at the Miracles for Kids office in Irvine. All boxes will be assembled on Wednesday, May 19 and delivered on Saturday, May 22. For more information, please visit www.miraclesforkids.org

Girls Inc. of Orange County’s Better Together: A Virtual Livestream Experience

June 4 On Friday, June 4, Girls Inc. of Orange County will host its signature fundraising event themed “Better Together” where guests will hear directly from the girls they serve, enjoy a delicious lunch delivered to their door, and take part in an exciting online auction – all while raising critical funds for Girls Inc. of Orange County’s important programs.

Attendees will hear how Girls Inc. has remained a resource to its girls through low commitment and high reward educational programming, community support, and mentorship. Purchase tickets by visiting https:// girlsinc-oc.ejoinme.org/BetterTogetherTickets

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Photos courtesy of Miracles for Kids, Girls Inc. of Orange County, Women for Orangewood and Blind Children’s Learning Center

Girls Inc. of Orange County College Shower

What: 44 Women for Orangewood 17th Annual Scholarship Luncheon

When: June 11 Join 44 Women for Orangewood – a dynamic group of women dedicated to helping Orange County’s foster and community youth – at the 17th Annual Scholarship Luncheon taking place on June 11. This very special luncheon raises important funds to support the work of Orangewood Foundation. Virtual and in-person attendance options are available. For more information, visit https://orangewoodfoundation.org/44lunch/.

When: June 15 Girls Inc. of Orange County's College Shower is a virtual event celebrating the accomplishments of the organization’s 98 College Bound program high school senior girls who have chosen to pursue higher education. Many of these girls are the first members of their families to attend college, and they need significant financial assistance in order to succeed.

Each girl receives a basket filled with essentials they need to head off to college, donated by generous Girls Inc. supporters! Here’s how you can get involved: • Host a College Shower Drive with your friends and/ or colleagues • Personally donate In-Kind items listed on the Wish List: https://www.amazon.com/registries/custom/ K357WV3YPRD5/guest-view • Become a College Shower Sponsor, supporting the event and Girls Inc. girls • Become a College Bound Mentor to one of the girls For more information and to RSVP, please email Hannah Rodriguez at hrodriguez@girlsinc-oc.org

What: Blind Children’s Learning Center’s Vision Beyond Sight Event

When: June 12 Vision Beyond Sight is the Blind Children’s Learning Center’s biggest fundraiser of the year. This year’s new hybrid format brings together the best aspects of a virtual gala with smaller-scale physical gatherings.

Participants may select the Enjoy from Home option, allowing donors to register for one or two individuals to enjoy the virtual experience from the comfort of their home, or the Reconnect option, which allows sponsors at all levels to host a private gathering at an appropriately sized home or corporate space, enjoying exclusive benefits, the coveted in-person experience, and all of the fun of the virtual event, too.

Funds raised from the event support the nonprofit’s full spectrum of programs for children with visual and other disabilities and their families. For more information, please visit https://www.blindkids.org/ vision-beyond-sight.html

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FIRST PERSO N BLISS IN A BARREL: MY EXPERIENCE WITH THE WIM HOF METHOD

By Alyssa Swanson Hamilton The first time I heard the words “Wim Hof,” it was from my brother, Alex, who praised him to the skies several years ago. Alex is a genetic nutrition expert and a fan of pushing limits. Any time he signs me up for an activity (mountain biking, river rafting) and tells me it’s no big deal, I know my life is in danger. He showed me a 2012 Vice documentary called The Superhuman World of Wim Hof: The Iceman about this Dutch extreme athlete, who created the method after a series of impressive feats including swimming under ice and running a half marathon above the Arctic Circle, barefoot and in shorts. “The cold,” Wim said, “brings us back to our inner nature.”

His method, he said, also supercharges the immune system by challenging and retraining the body.

The rapid, circular breathing and ice baths briefly caught my attention. My brother began the practices in earnest, while I tried the breathing for a couple of weeks, took one cold shower, and then let it go the way of several other trends I’d embraced and abandoned: Keto, Crossfit, once-a-week cheat days.

My brain was full. I’m a divorced parent of two nowteenage boys, I have a full-time job, I write stuff, and I have a meadow garden and an elderly dog. Anything beyond those categories tends to fall by the wayside.

Enter the Covid Year. I work in communications at a private school. In March 2020, most of us were sent home to work for several months. I set up my office at the kitchen table, and Zoom became the lifeline-dujour. When working from home and noticing — along with all of the things falling apart in various rooms — my haggard appearance on the Zoom camera, I started to take stock of my life. After a tough divorce, I had grown accustomed to utilizing my body as merely a vehicle to get me from A to B. A vehicle I ran into the ground. I was overweight and inflamed, I was tired all of the time, I was working crazy hours and getting rashes from stress.

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Photos courtesy of Alyssa Swanson Hamilton

Some folks have found they became less healthy during our quarantine year (understandable, for a thousand reasons), but for me it was more of a reverse engineering back to wellness. I chose a primarily Paleo diet and started walking daily. Out of necessity, we ate every meal at home. I started to enjoy cooking healthy meals again. Weirdly, I also started craving the idea of ice baths. I wanted to start the breathing exercises again. Something had broken loose inside me. I wanted a dramatic change.

I ordered a used wine barrel on eBay, from a winery in Paso Robles. My parents gave it to me for my birthday.

I rolled it into the backyard and added 70 pounds of ice and water from the hose. I held off on eating beforehand as these activities are not recommended when your digestion is engaged. I did my breathing first: three rounds of 30 deep rhythmic inhalations and exhalations, each culminating in a one- to twominute breath hold, followed by a 15-second inhale.

This breathing technique, also called controlled hyperventilation or power breathing, increases the amount of oxygen available to the body.

I got on my step stool and lowered myself into the icy water. Ouch. It hurt! A lot. I fought the urge to flee or hold my breath. I slowly submerged myself up to my shoulders, my legs crossed underneath me.

After about a minute, my body calmed down. The pain went away. My surroundings seemed sharper, brighter. I looked up at my jacaranda tree, marveled at the intricacies of the leaves. The wind wove through its branches, like music. I felt at peace. My mind was empty of everything except the sensory details of that exact moment. My body was so focused on making sure I survived the cold that I couldn’t distract myself with thoughts.

It was like no other meditation I’ve ever done, including Transcendental Meditation with a mantra.

This was the mother of all mindfulness hacks. I no longer felt the cold. I lost track of time, blissed out under my tree. I got out after my timer went off: 10 minutes. It turned out that was a bit too long for my first time, and it took a few hours to warm back up with clothing layers and movement. I was supposed to work up to the ice baths with short cold showers, but I’m not a patient person and sometimes I skip steps.

Over the next several months, I made a ritual out of doing ice baths at least once a week. I did the breathing exercises daily and noticed an improvement in my stress management and my ability to fall asleep and sleep more soundly. I felt calmer. My skin improved.

In the winter time, I expanded my cold immersion to the ocean. It became a sacred act and each time I entered the water, I felt a little bit reborn, like I had reclaimed another part of myself. The discomfort upon first entering the cold was quickly replaced by a deep sense of wellbeing.

Cold exposure and deep breathing also stimulate the vagus nerve, an important part of the parasympathetic nervous system connecting many organs including the brain, heart, liver and gut. Having low vagal tone — meaning it’s impaired — can lead to inflammation, anxiety, depression and gut issues. The Wim Hof Method’s success in improving vagal tone is welldocumented in many scientific studies.

The breathing takes 15-20 minutes per day. The ice bath involves some set up (I now freeze my own giant cubes in a chest freezer) but even that is minimal. People buy garden troughs at Home Depot or repurpose chest freezers; there are a million ways to create the ice bath environment. For those with mobility challenges, even plunging your face in ice water will stimulate the vagus nerve and provide benefits comparable to a full body immersion.

The Wim Hof method is by far the best bio hack I’ve come across and the only one I’ve maintained longer than a few months. The lessons you learn in the cold stay with you — you gain resilience and a greater ability to focus. The breathing greatly benefits your entire physiology over time. And it’s all free, unless you buy ice! For more information, I highly recommend these resources: Website: The Wim Hof Method Book: The Wim Hof Method: Activate Your Human Potential

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L AST LOO K

America Martin Two Women Walk and One Gathers Flowers Oil & Acrylic on Canvas, 44 x 37.50 in Available at JoAnne Artman Gallery, Laguna Beach | New York, 949.510.5481 Visit “Garden Party,” an exclusive online exhibition featuring America Martin, Anna Kincaide, Mary Finlayson + Michael Callas, at www.joanneartmangallery.com. Through May 29, 2021.