NORTH EASTERN EPISCOPAL DISTRICT African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church Bishop George D. Crenshaw, Presiding Prelate Mrs. Laurenna H. Crenshaw, Missionary Supervisor
Leadership Training Institute Stamford Marriott Hotel & Spa 243 Tresser Blvd., Stamford, CT Theme: Discipleship Workshop Title: “Called To Become” Rev. Dr. Douglas L. Maven, Presenter
My Contact Information: RevDrMaven@gmail.com Cell: (201) 249-1749
Principles for Being an Effective Christian Ministry Mentee Being a mentee in Christian ministry is more than learning how to perform ministry tasks. It is an opportunity to grow in Christlikeness, character, wisdom, spiritual maturity, leadership, and service. A good mentee does not simply ask, “What can my mentor teach me?” but also asks, “What is God developing in me through this relationship?” Proverbs 27:17 — “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” The goal of Christian mentoring is not to create a copy of the mentor. The goal is to help the mentee become the person and servant God has called them to be.
1.
Be Teachable
A mentee must have a willing heart to learn. Being teachable means being willing to receive instruction, correction, advice, and constructive criticism. A teachable mentee: • Listens before responding. • Asks questions. • Does not assume they know everything. • Receives correction without becoming defensive. • Learns from both successes and failures. • Applies what they have been taught. Biblical principle: Proverbs 9:9 — “Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser.” Question: Am I more interested in proving that I am right or becoming better? 2. Be Humble Ministry requires humility. A mentee should never approach a mentor with the attitude, “I already know everything.” Humility creates room for growth. Remember: • You do not have to know everything. • You do not have to be the most gifted person in the room. • You can learn from people who have different experiences. • Correction is not rejection. • Being developed takes time. Philippians 2:3 — “In lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.”
3.
Be Spiritually Grounded
The mentor is not your source—God is your source. A mentee should develop their own relationship with Jesus Christ rather than depending entirely upon the mentor for spiritual direction. Maintain: • Prayer • Bible study • Worship • Fasting when appropriate • Personal devotion • Fellowship • Obedience to God's Word John 15:5 — “He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit.” A mentor can guide you, but only God can transform you.
4.
Respect Your Mentor
Honor the person who has agreed to invest time, wisdom, experience, and spiritual guidance into your development. Respect includes: • • • • • • • •
Being punctual. Keeping appointments. Listening attentively. Preparing for meetings. Following through on assignments. Protecting confidential conversations. Expressing appreciation. Avoiding unnecessary demands on your mentor's time.
1 Thessalonians 5:12–13 encourages believers to recognize and esteem those who labor among them.
5.
Be Consistent
Ministry development requires commitment over time. A mentee should not be enthusiastic for two weeks and disappear for two months. Demonstrate consistency in: • Attendance • Communication
• • • •
Assignments Ministry involvement Personal spiritual growth Following through on commitments
Consistency builds trust. Your mentor should eventually be able to say: “When I give this person something to do, I know it will get done.”
6.
Ask Good Questions
One of the greatest benefits of having a mentor is access to experience. Don't simply ask: “What should I do?” Learn to ask: • “Why did you handle it that way?” • “What did you learn from that experience?” • “What mistakes should I avoid?” • “What would you do differently if you had to do it again?” • “What Scripture guides your approach?” • “What weaknesses do you see that I need to work on?” • “What skills should I develop next?” Good questions produce deeper learning.
7.
Be Willing to Receive Correction Correction is one of the most valuable parts of mentoring. A mentor who genuinely cares about your development may tell you things you don't want to hear. Do not automatically interpret correction as criticism. Proverbs 12:1 — “Whoso loveth instruction loveth knowledge.” When corrected: 1. Listen. 2. Don't immediately defend yourself. 3. Ask for clarification. 4. Pray about it. 5. Evaluate it biblically. 6. Make the necessary changes. A mature mentee learns to say: “Thank you for telling me. I will work on that.”
8.
Put Teaching Into Practice
Information without application produces little transformation. If your mentor teaches you something, practice it.
If you learn about: • Evangelism → go evangelize. • Bible study → study the Bible. • Leadership → lead something. • Discipleship → disciple someone. • Preaching → prepare and preach. • Pastoral care → learn how to care for people. • Conflict resolution → practice biblical reconciliation. James 1:22 — “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only.”
9.
Be Accountable
Accountability helps protect your spiritual development and ministry. A mentee should be willing to answer honestly about: • Spiritual disciplines • Ministry responsibilities • Personal growth • Areas of temptation • Leadership challenges • Assignments • Goals • Relationships • Areas needing improvement Accountability is not about control. It is about growth, protection, and responsibility.
10. Protect Confidentiality Ministry involves sensitive information. Your mentor may share personal experiences, leadership challenges, or confidential matters with you. Do not turn mentoring conversations into gossip. Ask yourself: “Would I want my mentor repeating something I shared privately?” If not, don't repeat what they share with you. Proverbs 11:13 — “A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.”
11. Serve Before You Seek a Position A mentee should develop a servant's heart. Do not make the primary goal: “When will I get my position?”
Instead ask: “How can I serve?” Jesus taught: Mark 10:43 — “Whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister.” Ministry is not primarily about titles. It is about serving people and glorifying God.
12. Don't Compare Your Journey With Your Mentor's Journey Your mentor may be further ahead because they have been walking with God and serving for many years. Don't become discouraged by the difference. Instead, learn from their experience. Don't compare. Learn. Your responsibility is to be faithful with the stage of development God has given you.
13. Develop Your Own Calling A mentor should help you discover and develop your God-given gifts—not turn you into a duplicate of themselves. You may have a different: • Calling • Personality • Communication style • Leadership style • Ministry assignment • Spiritual gift • Audience Paul told Timothy: 2 Timothy 1:6 — “Stir up the gift of God, which is in thee.” Learn from your mentor while allowing God to develop your own ministry identity.
14. Be Honest About Your Weaknesses You cannot effectively grow in areas you refuse to acknowledge. A mature mentee can say: • “I struggle with this.” • “I don't understand.” • “I made a mistake.” • “I need help.” • “I don't know how to handle this.”
•
“Please show me how to improve.”
Honesty creates opportunities for development.
15. Be Patient With the Process • • • • • •
Ministry maturity takes time. Don't expect mentoring to transform you overnight. Jesus spent years developing His disciples. Paul invested in Timothy. Moses developed Joshua. Elijah invested in Elisha.
Growth is a process! Galatians 6:9 — “Let us not be weary in well doing.”
16. Honor the Mentor Without Idolizing the Mentor • • • • •
Respect your mentor, but don't put them in God's place. Your mentor can make mistakes. Your mentor has limitations. Your mentor is still growing. Your ultimate authority is God's Word, and your ultimate allegiance is to Jesus Christ.
Psalm 118:8 — “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.” A healthy mentoring relationship points you toward Christ, not toward dependence upon a person.
17. Become a Multiplier One of the ultimate goals of mentoring is reproduction. What you learn should eventually benefit someone else. Paul told Timothy: 2 Timothy 2:2 — “The same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also.” The pattern is: Christ → Mentor → Mentee → Future Leaders Don't allow what you learn to stop with you.
18. Pray for Your Mentor Your mentor needs prayer too. Pray for: • Their spiritual strength • Their family • Their ministry • Their wisdom • Their health • Their leadership • Their protection • Their continued growth Mentoring should be a spiritual partnership, not merely a professional relationship.
19. Establish Clear Expectations At the beginning of the relationship, discuss: • • • • • • • • •
How often will we meet? What are our goals? What does the mentor expect from the mentee? What does the mentee expect from the mentor? How will progress be measured? What assignments will be given? How should communication happen? What information is confidential? How will disagreements be handled?
Clear expectations prevent unnecessary misunderstandings.
20. Pursue Character Before Platform Perhaps the most important principle is this: God is more concerned with who you are becoming than how visible your ministry becomes. You can develop: • A powerful preaching voice, • A large following, • Excellent leadership skills, • Organizational ability, … and still have serious character problems. Therefore, pursue:
• • • • •
Character before charisma. Integrity before influence. Faithfulness before fame. Servanthood before status. Christlikeness before platform.
1 Timothy 3:2 — “A bishop then must be blameless…”
Mentee Reflection & Evaluation: At the end of each session, ask yourself: Spiritual Growth: • Am I growing closer to Christ? • Is my prayer life developing? • Am I consistently studying God's Word? Charisma: • What weakness has God revealed to me? • How am I responding to correction? • Am I becoming more Christlike? Ministry: • What have I learned? • What have I put into practice? • Where have I served? Leadership: • Am I becoming more dependable? • Can people trust me? • Am I learning to lead with humility? Next Step: • What is God teaching me right now? • What do I need to improve? • What should I focus on before our next mentoring meeting?
The 10 Commitments of a Christian Ministry Mentee I commit to: 1. Be teachable. 2. Walk humbly. 3. Stay spiritually grounded in Christ. 4. Honor and respect my mentor. 5. Be consistent and dependable. 6. Receive correction with maturity. 7. Apply what I learn. 8. Maintain confidentiality and integrity. 9. Serve before seeking position. 10. Use what I learn to develop others.
********************************* A Mentee's Prayer Lord, Thank You for placing people in my life who can help me grow. Give me a teachable spirit, a humble heart, and the wisdom to receive godly instruction. Help me to listen well, accept correction, remain accountable, and faithfully apply what I learn. Develop my character before developing my platform. Teach me to serve before I seek recognition. Help me discover and fulfill the calling You have placed upon my life. Bless my mentor with wisdom, strength, patience, and discernment. Help our relationship honor You and produce lasting spiritual fruit. Make me faithful with what I have been entrusted with and help me become someone who can eventually invest in others. In Jesus' name, Amen. What Is Your Ministry Gift? Go to: gifts.churchgrowth.org Take the survey and see the results.