Conflict Resolution

It is bound to happen . . . whether it is in your professional life or your personal life, you are going to experience conflict! It is inevitable that—because we are individuals with different principles, beliefs and points of view—there will be times when disputes transpire among us. There are several types of conflicts, and it is only a matter of time before one pops up in your life.

According to American psychologist, Daniel Katz, conflict arises primarily due to these three sources: • Economic conflict which comes about when there is a limited number of resources available. The parties involved become hostile in their efforts to attain the most of the limited resources. • Value conflict comes into play when different preferences and principles are present. War is a prime example of value conflict whereby differing beliefs are aggressively asserted. • Power conflict is demonstrated when one party tries to maximize influence over another.

As noted previously, due to human nature, conflict is unavoidable, and therefore, it becomes necessary for one to learn how best to deal with conflict. In an article posted by CLIMB Professional Development and Training, March 11, 2020, five different categories of conflict resolution from The Thomas-Kilmann Model are addressed.

1. Avoidance: A person using this strategy is simply trying to ignore the conflict, hoping it will resolve on its own or dissipate. 2. Accommodating: This strategy involves doing whatever is necessary to satisfy the other party at the expense of your own needs or desires. 3. Compromission: Finding an acceptable resolution that will at least partly satisfy all parties involved. 4. Competing: One party uses competing to meet their own wants at the expense of others involved. 5. Collaborating: All involved finding a solution that completely responds to the concerns of all parties involved.

The Thomas-Kilmann model identifies two dimensions that individuals fall into when choosing a resolution strategy: assertiveness and cooperativeness. The obvious difference is assertiveness benefits one’s own needs or concerns while cooperativeness requires taking action to address the other’s needs or concerns.

Each of the five strategies can be effective given certain situations. In order to choose the conflict resolution that best accommodates any given situation, several factors should be contemplated:

• The importance of your needs • The impact on you (or others) if needs are not met • The consequences of choosing to be more assertive • If there is a collaborative or cooperative option available

There are skills that one can develop that will improve one’s ability to determine which strategy is most effective in securing a resolution. These skills include:

• Effective listening • Identification of specific points of disagreement • Clearly expressing your needs or concerns • View the conflict as an opportunity for growth • Don’t generalize or escalate the situation—focus on the specific issues at hand

As noted previously, due to human nature, conflict is unavoidable, and therefore, it becomes necessary for one to learn how best to deal with conflict.

Of course, the best way to handle a conflict is to avoid a conflict all together! Here are some tips to make that challenge less daunting:

1. Avoid misunderstandings. 2. Don’t make snap judgments; gather all relevant information before making any move; first impressions are not always the best. 3. Listen to your opponent; don’t argue to prove your point. 4. Calmly suggest alternatives. 5. Don’t be defensive; be objective. 6. Contemplate the situation. 7. Control your emotions; emotional imbalances are the main reason for conflict and often lead to an argument, tension, and abuse. 8. Don’t try to be a mindreader—use viable, open communication channels; don’t assume you have all the answers. 9. Make the argument a discussion rather than a potential conflict. Don’t make negative comments, particularly of personal nature. 10. Find balance in your life. Create a positive environment around yourself.

Regardless of the cause of the conflict or disagreement, it is critical to sort things out rather than leaving issues unresolved, affording the opportunity for the conflict to fester and potentially erupt. Conflict resolution is a valuable tool which can be used to help one successfully navigate the challenges of daily life. Conflict, itself, can even be viewed as a necessary evil as each of us stands up for our beliefs and yet makes a determined effort to listen to and accept another’s viewpoint and through cooperation and collaboration, resolve what might have been an explosive situation through open, civil communication and respect.

Sources Bhasin, H. (2019, February 15). How To Avoid Conflict? 10 Tips on

Avoiding Conflict. Marketing91. https://www.marketing91.com/ how-to-avoid-conflict/ C.P.D.A.T. (2020, March 11). What Are the Five Conflict Resolution

Strategies? Portland Community College. https://climb.pcc.edu/blog/ what-are-the-five-conflict-resolution-strategies/ Hosting, W. (2013, August 17). What is Conflict—Understanding

Conflict. Types of Conflict. https://typesofconflict.org/what-is-conflict/

Written by Co-Authors: Sami Satouri, RHU®, ChHC® President, Quest Insurance ssatouri@questinsurance.us 703-961-8886 And

Traci Krial Executive Assistant/Business Development Specialist, Quest Insurance traci@questinsurance.us 571-367-7971