MEET THE Ponto Family

Necessity often forces us to find new solutions to a problem. No one knows that better than the parents of special needs children, who dread the day when their child ages out of school, and all the supports provided as part of their education abruptly end. College programs tailored to young adults with special needs are a possibility for some, while others find a niche in the workforce. But for many, those aren’t viable options.

Carmel residents David and Maureen Ponto knew they would be facing that situation all too soon. Their younger daughter, Grace, 16, is autistic and has obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). (Their oldest daughter, Isabel, 23, is neurotypical and attends IUPUI.) The family moved back to Indiana from Illinois five years ago so that Grace could attend Westfield schools. But in two short years, she will turn 18 and graduate from high school.

That compelled the Pontos to start Grace’s Oasis Adult Day Center, which Maureen describes as “a place of enrichment, nurturing, and security for individuals with developmental disabilities like my daughter.” It’s also a huge benefit for parents, who can stay in the workforce knowing that their young adult is spending his or her day in a safe space where they can continue to grow and make connections with others. In fact, starting the center created a career opportunity for Maureen herself – as an educator who also holds a degree in social science, she was the perfect person to become Grace’s Oasis’s first executive director.

Plenty of challenges remain for the Pontos, though. Since David also works full time (he is a registered nurse), getting Grace to her therapy appointments is tough. She does get music therapy at home, but finding in-home providers of occupational, speech, and physical therapy has proven much more difficult. Then there is the social isolation that almost all special-needs families experience. “[It is difficult] for us to find acceptance among typical families, unfortunately,” Maureen said. “Our advice is to go out in public and do the things that will make your family happy, regardless of what others may think. We try not to let the opinions of others affect us.”

Right now, Grace is about as active in athletics as any teen can be. She participates in Special Olympics tennis, goes bowling, is part of JM Fitness adaptive yoga and basketball, and plays Premier Indy adaptive soccer. The backyard pool takes care of her love of water.

Her academic progress continues to bring Maureen and David a lot of joy. “When Grace started kindergarten, I never thought in a million years that she would be able to read and write or do math,” Maureen said. “I [credit her] teacher Kathy Oloffson back in Illinois, who is the most amazing special needs teacher ever. She helped Grace succeed so much!”

Going anywhere with Grace, whether it’s a weekend trip or just out to dinner, takes some coordination on Maureen and David’s part. “Grace has OCD issues that make going out in public a very difficult thing, so we can only do it when both of us are there to assist,” Maureen said. “We generally only go to restaurants with outdoor seating so we can sit outside and as far away from everyone else as possible. We try to avoid calling attention to ourselves because Grace is loud and sings a lot. She makes happy noises, but it causes people to look at us. If we travel, we stay within a two-hour radius in case we need to come home. We rent houses on lakes so that we can get in lots of swimming and still have privacy.”

The Pontos are grateful to Amtryke, who gave Grace an adaptive bike so she can ride independently. “We also received a Noah’s Bed through our insurance company and an amazing adaptive adult wheelchair for public outings that is tremendously helpful when navigating busy public places,” Maureen said. She encourages parents of special needs children to apply for the Indiana Family Supports Waiver as early as possible. The waiver is the entry point to start receiving services for a child or adult with a developmental disability.

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Her academic progress continues to bring Maureen and David a lot of joy. “When Grace started kindergarten, I never thought in a million years that she would be able to read and write or do math,” Maureen said. “I [credit her] teacher Kathy Oloffson back in Illinois, who is the most amazing special needs teacher ever. She helped Grace succeed so much!”