Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
MOBILE COMPUTER REPAIR AND SERVICE - Quality work performed in-shop, in office or in-home. Dependable, affordable! Over 14 Years Experience. Proudly serving Carson Valley and Surrounding Communities. Call Nick at Technologic Computer Repair (775)450-7570 REFRIGERANT R12, 30 POUNDS, $30 PER POUND, Onnie (775)883-8073 JOHN DEERE AND NEW HOLLAND TRACTORS and Mowers, visit us at www.rennerequipment.com or call for prices (775)465-2217 STICK WELDER, MILLER 250G ON WHEELS, runs $500 OBO; Worx electric chainsaw with 10’ extension, still in box $130 OBO, Pat (775)265-2578 ELECTROLYSIS AND LASER FOR HAIR REMOVAL; Complimentary, confidential consultation. 30 years experience. Weekday, evening, Saturday appointments available, Sally Battista (775)782-6190 GREAT WINTER PROJECT! 1927 FORD MODEL T Coupe, 50% restored, complete car, no missing parts, excellent fenders, hood, new radiator, body done, five wire wheels, everything sandblasted, Ruxsteel two speed rear axle $6,000 (775)465-2147
WE BUY MOBILE HOMES, PARKS OR WITH land, NV# U2175 (775)815-1214 POWER PRO 30” CUT RIDING LAWN MOWER, five speed, shift on the dash, needs work but runs, tow cart included $200 OBO (775)450-3004 MONUMENTS UNLIMITED, HEADSTONES, CURBING, Granite and Concrete, All Colors Available, Quality Work (775)720-1627 DUCK AND GEESE DECOYS, HUNTING Gear, other miscellaneous items, make offer (775)267-2733 TOP CASH FOR ANTIQUE MINING, RAILROAD, Indian, Cowboy, Gambling Items; Lamps, Toys, Bottles, Advertising, Costume Jewelry, Indian and Mexican Tourist Jewelry, Glass Beads, Rhinestones any condition, please call Ron (775)782-3893 HOT TUB SERVICE AND REPAIR, WEEKLY AND Bi Weekly service, Reasonable Rates, Private Homes and Vacation Rentals, Call Tahoe Sierra Hot Tub’s (775)267-2490 2006 TOP OF THE LINE SUBARU FORESTER L.L. Bean, one owner, like new, non smoker, garaged, 6CD player, moon-roof, faithfully maintained, 103,000 miles, Vin#9229, everything works $9,999 Bob (775)781-0244
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Why it is Important to Say “Thank You”
You are polite. You say “please” and “thank you” even “excuse me.” You try not to be rude to people and you hold the door open for others. But why is it important and what is your reason for being polite? Are you looking for selfish gain? Some people are very polite not for others, but for selfish gain. For those people being polite is a “see how good I am” type of act. These people are typically polite to strangers and yet not with their own family. There are some people who act polite but only for some sort of reward or self-gratification. Who they will be polite to will depend on what they want, because they only want something for themselves. Is everyone selfish? Some people are polite because they were taught to be. There are people who are polite because it helps others. Then other people know a bit of kindness can change the day of another and sometimes even a life. How can “thank you” change a life? If you live a life of saying thank you with a smile or the words, then you could change the world. A simple smile can ripple around the city. Saying thank you with a heart of gratitude can change a life. By saying thank you and meaning it, you could change a very bad day into a day of joy. What is so powerful about an attitude of gratitude? By expressing your gratitude to someone who helped you, you are doing more than saying a basic thank you. You are sharing a bit of your heart. For the person receiving that gift from you,
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they notice, even if nothing happens that day. Can “Thank You” change tomorrow? The bit of gratitude from the heart will weigh on the heart of the person gifted with it. One day they will question why your “thank you” was so different, why your attitude was so powerful. Once they realize why, a life will be changed. But what about my life? Look around at all the things in your life for which you should be thankful. Even if you think you have little to give thanks for, look at the clothes you are wearing, the people who care about you. You can reach out and say thanks to the people in your life, there is a power in the heartfelt words of gratitude. Should I say thanks over the small things? When you start to say thank you for the little things, bigger things have a way of appearing. It will not happen overnight. But by noticing the little things and giving thanks, you become more open to little steps that lead to bigger things. A BAD TILE JOB CAN BE LIKE A BAD HAIRCUT, but it doesn’t grow back, so don’t get hacked! Done right the first time, Sundance Tile and Marble, NV#58795 (775)6919954 CUSTOM MASONRY, ONE BRICK AT A TIME, Commercial/Residential, 3+ Better Business Bureau rating, serving Carson Valley 12+ years, Free Estimates, M Sqrd Masonry, NV#200616647 and CA#924187, Marc Duryee (775)450-6219 or (775)783-4753
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®
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Anything
“Anything that annoys you is “for” teaching you patience. Anyone who abandons you is “for” teaching you how to stand up on your own two feet. Anything that angers you is “for” teaching you forgiveness and compassion. Anything that has power over you is “for” teaching you how to take your power back. Anything you hate is “for” teaching you unconditional love. Anything you fear is “for” teaching you courage to overcome your fear. Anything you can’t control is “for” teaching you how to let go and trust the Universe.” Jackson Kiddard WE HAVE A LARGE SELECTION OF NEW AND Used RV’s and a full parts and service department, Carson City RV, 4550 North Carson Street, North Highway 395 (775)882-8335 PART TIME EMPLOYMENT, NON-PROFIT AGENCY; flexible hours working with seniors. Positions available in Topaz, Coleville, Walker and Bridgeport, California. Call for more information (530)495-2700
Brain Teasers
WNC Motorcycle Rider Course
Motorcycle season is upon us. Learn to ride a motorcycle in 2½ days. WNC uses the Motorcycle Safety Foundation (MSF) curriculum and teaches the Basic Rider Course (BRC) and the Advanced Rider Course (ARC). The BRC is geared towards new riders and those with experience who need/ want a refresher course. The Motorcycle season is winding down - learn to ride by taking the BRC class –the last date of the season is November 4th – 6th, 2016. WNC provides the training motorcycle 250 CC and a helmet. Cost $160. Enjoy the feeling of riding a motorcycle while enjoying the open road and lovely weather. Check class descriptions, dates, cost and registration on line at www.campusece.net/wnc/ or call (775)445-4268 LICENSED AND BONDED ELECTRICIAN, ADDITIONS, Remodels, Extra Outlets, Switches, Light Fixtures, Ceiling Fans, Trouble Shooting and Power Panel upgrades, etc., 18 Years Experience, Free Estimates, Senior Discount, NV#52647, Degenspark Electric (775)2674229 IRS PROBLEMS? FEDERAL AND ALL STATES, Past years returns and audit representation, “Service you can trust, quality you can afford.”, Call James A. Farnham, enrolled agent, 20 years experience, Reasonable Rates, Income Tax Services (775)392-0321
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1. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. 2. I walked one day on the street. I found something that had worth. You make sure you don’t lose it. It has a color, size and shape but every one is different. You touch it, enjoy it, like it, and always count it over. What am I? 3. The Smiths were a wealthy family. They lived in a large circular house. When Mr. Smith came back he noticed that his favorite jersey was ruined. He asked who did this. Mrs. Smith said I was washing the cloths. The daughter said I was drawing a picture. The son said I was playing basketball. The maid said I was dusting in the corners. Who ruined the jersey. 4. Two sentries were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyone approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, “Why are you smiling?” How did he know that his companion was smiling? Find the answers on a following page. FOR A NEW AND INNOVATIVE HAIR STYLE call Cathy Hallifax at Déjà vu Salon in Minden, mention this ad for $5 off any hair service (530)518-1166 or (775)7828776 BLAZE KING WOOD BURNING STOVE AND caddie; two cords firewood, buyer load, package deal $650; boys three speed bike $20; girls ten speed bike $20 (775)7907745
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Finally, I’ve found Sierra Air - a company I can trust!
Happy November 5th Birthday Nick!
I hope you have a wonderful day Nick. And as you know, I am somewhat old school, so I will hug you on your birthday instead of texting you and I will sing you Happy Birthday instead of tagging you in tweets on Twitter, lol. Happy birthday son. Love you very much, Mom PORSCHE 911 or 912 WANTED, NEEDED! IF you have one that is taking up space and you would like to move it to a new home, have cash and a trailer (775)291-6827 CASH PAID FOR OLD COSTUME JEWELRY: Rhinestones, Mexican and Indian Tourist Jewelry, Rings, Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins, Men’s Jewelry, Old Plastics, Silver, Copper, Glass Beads, Old Wind Up Watches and Watch Parts, Charm Bracelets, Lockets etc. Larger quantities preferred. I drive to you. Joanne, please leave clear message (775)465-9422
Caregivers Needed
Join our team of Caregivers and make a difference in the lives of seniors. Provide companionship and bring assisted living into their home. Full-time, part-time, days, nights, 12 hour, and 24 hour shifts available. Retired and mature adults encourage to apply. EOE Apply online eden-homecare.com (775)392-2000 GUN SHOP FOR SALE: NEVADA GUN EXCHANGE, lucrative business for 26 years, time to retire! 1819 N. Carson Street, Carson City (775)884-4867 BATH TUBS REPAIRED, RESURFACED, AND re-colored, Acrylic, Fiberglass and Porcelain, Call The Tub Doctor (530)495-1641 or (775)233- 5297 24” YARD MACHINE SNOW BLOWER, 8HP in excellent condition $400, Walt (775)463-5951
PAINTER, SEMI-RETIRED WITH 40 YEARS experience in Nevada, Save Money, Get Seasonal Discount Now, inside or out, Fences (775)901-1912
GRASS-FED BEEF, ALL LOCALLY GROWN, $4.25 per pound hanging weight, works out to about $6 per pound cut and wrapped (775)721-1574
WE’LL KEEP YOU IN STITCHES, WE COVER autos, furniture and ATV’s, 47 years experience, Tweeds Upholstery, Gardnerville, tweedsupholstery@yahoo.com or (775)782-5812
WANTED: KNIVES, I WANT TO BUY POCKET, Folding, Hunting and Military Knives, Bayonets and Swords, interested in any quantity, I pay in cash, Jeff (775)7202577
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
10 Reasons Why God Created Eve...
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because he knew men would never ask directions. 9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV remote because men don’t want to see what’s on television, they want to see WHAT ELSE is on television. 8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when the seat wore out and therefore would need Eve to get one for him. 7. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor’s appointment for himself. 6. God knew that Adam would never remember which night was garbage night. 5. God knew that if the world was to be populated there would have to be someone to bear children, because men would never be able to handle it. 4. As ‘Keeper of the Garden’ Adam would never remember where he put his tools. 3. The scripture account of creation indicates that Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden. 2. As the Bible says, ‘It is not good for man to be alone.’ He only ends up getting himself in trouble. And the #1 reason why God created Eve is... When God had finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched his head and said, ‘I KNOW I can do better than THIS!!’ 1984 YAMAHA SR540K SNOW MOBILE WITH matching sled, excellent condition, like new, 848 miles $500, Bridgeport (760)932-7678 C.F.I. CERTIFIED CARPET, HARDWOOD, VINYL, no charge for furniture or tear-out. Three-year labor warranty! Residential and Commercial Competitive pricing, JS Flooring (775)267-4123 TNT UPHOLSTERY, CUSTOM AUTOS, BOATS, furniture and leather work, free estimates, 1482 Southgate Dr., #106, Gardnerville (775)267-5433
Next Time...
someone asks you if they can “sneak by you,” ask them how the heck they plan to do that when you know they are going by. Tell them that next time they should not warn you, and maybe, just maybe, they could sneak by. COMPLETE LANDSCAPING AND SNOW REMOVAL, RESIDENTIAL and Commercial, Weekly Maintenance, Tree Trimming, Emergency Repairs, Sprinklers/Drip, Pavers, Patios, Retaining Walls, Davenport Landscape and Design, NV Lic.#0074827, www.davenportlandscape. com or (775)265-1491 or (775)721-8439 COMPLETE LAWNCARE, PAVERS, RETAINING Walls and More! 30 years in Carson Valley, Senior Discounts and Free Estimates, Nevada Lawns (775)450-2156
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
The Perfect Relationship
If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say it’s not quite as good as his mother’s then adopt a dog. If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want then adopt a dog. If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn’t care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies then adopt a dog. If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores then adopt a dog! If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn’t care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually then adopt a dog... BUT, on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness, then adopt a cat! Now be honest, you thought I was gonna say... Marry a man, didn’t you?
Texting and Driving? Watch Out for the Textalyzer
A textalyzer is a proposed device that would act as a breathalyzer for text messaging. The device has been promoted as a means of reducing distracted driving. The device would be used by police officers who suspect that a driver has been texting while driving using similar procedures currently in place for drivers suspected of driving under the influence. The device would be connected to the driver’s mobile phone and would scan the phone for calls, e-mails, or text messages sent when the driver would have been operating the vehicle. In 2016, legislation was introduced in the New York Senate to implement the use of textalyzers. COMPUTER DESK, LIKE NEW $60; ELECTRONIC air filter $20 (775)465-2359 ASPHALT AND CONCRETE DRIVEWAYS, GRADING and Utility Work in the Carson Valley, 30 years in business, Free Estimates, BR Constructors, NV#28567/ NV#31076 (775)782-4477 or (775)690-8593 HOUSE CLEANING, SERVING DAYTON, Carson City areas, established in area over 20 years, honest, reliable, references on request, Linda (775)246-4383
ROAD APPLES R US! WE WILL MANAGE YOUR manure, for more information and photos please see our website ManureMaintenance.com or call Mark (775)600-3385 or Deborah (775)684-9819
36” ENTRY DOOR WITH DECORATIVE GLASS insert, make offer; sturdy wood drop-leaf breakfast table with two matching chairs $50 (775)392-4242
LIKE NEW HARBOR FREIGHT SALE: 30” five drawer tool cart $100; 90-amp wire feed welder and welding cart, both for $80, call for Harbor Freight stock numbers, Stan (775)782-3653
HYDRAULIC AND PNEUMATIC AIR CYLINDERS repair and rebuild, log splitters, tractors, farm equipment, dump trucks and trailers, etc. all makes and models. Machining, Welding, Fabrication, Design, reasonable rates! 18 years experience, Ramco Fabrication, Shawn (775)2677358
$69 SERVICE CALL, ACADEMY APPLIANCE Service; Washers, Dryers, Refrigerators, Ranges, Dishwashers, Compactors, some areas extra charge, Serving Carson Valley (775)781-4725
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HANDYMAN FOR ALL YOUR OUTSIDE NEEDS, yard cleanup, power wash, fence repair, minor jobs, free estimates, NV#11376PC (775)246-9899
Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com Thanksgiving Weather Forecast
In the pre-Thanksgiving rush, we have received an early weather report from our in-house weather reporters. This is one, you should be sure to email your Mom. Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder. During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy. A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low of 34F in the refrigerator. Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone. ONE HOUR MASSAGE $30 BY SPRING RANCH Spa, cupping massage available, extra fee for mobile service, Donna/Coleville, CA#63979, NVMT7284 (760)616-4091 EBONITE POOL TABLE, 1” SLATE, 9’ LONG, good condition $800 OBO; electronic player piano $3,500 OBO; oak bar with upper back bar and mirror $1,000 OBO; queen hide-a-bed, good condition $200 OBO; roll top desk $500 (775)315-0303 ALL AMERICAN OVERHEAD DOOR, NEW INSTALLATION, Repairs and Service, Commercial/Residential, 10% Discount for Spring Repair, Free Estimates and Senior Discount (775)450-2156
A Prayer Upon Waking
Dear God, so far today, I’ve done all right. I haven’t gossiped, and I haven’t lost my temper. I haven’t been grumpy, nasty or selfish, and I’m really glad of that! But in a few minutes, God, I’m going to get out of bed, and from then on, I’m probably going to need a lot of help. Thank you! Amen. $100 OFF CLUTCH OR TRANSMISSION REPLACEMENT! New, used and rebuilds, up to 3 year, 100,000-mile warranty, Double J Auto, 1475 Southgate Drive, Gardnerville (775)782-8592 INCOME TAX, GEORGE HALLIFAX, CPA, EA, TAX Preparation, Federal and all States, Prior Years, Audit Representation, 30 Years Experience, Reasonable Rates (775)392-0418
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” WNC Community Education Classes
Women’s Self Defense, Voice Over, R.I.P.P.E.D. exercise class, Computer Basics, Other potential classes coming for fall Finance, Basic Math and English. Check class descriptions, dates, cost and registration on line at www.campusece. net/wnc/ or call (775)445-4268 1993 CAMARO PARTS CAR, INTERIOR plastic trim pieces, headliner, complete front and rear ends, and more, ready for pick and pull soon, call with offers ready, phone or text (775)309-7900 GOT ART? COME SEE OUR NEW SELECTION of Contemporary, Rustic frames at Lone Tree Frame Company, 1497 Hwy. 395 N., Gardnerville (775)782-2522 HOME IN NEED OF IMPROVEMENT? ADDITIONS, Remodels, Garages, We Do It All! Free Estimates, 21 Years Experience, Carson Valley Construction Company LLC, NV#0074855 (775)291-1453 REMODELING? TWO UNOPENED BOXES (32 sq. ft. 1’x2’ pieces) marbled, light gold porcelain floor tiles plus adhesive $45 (half price) (775)265-7578 IN DYER NEED OF AUTOMOTIVE SERVICE? For a good, honest mechanic, call Brian Dyer, 12+ years serving Dayton area! Dayton Valley Service (775)246-7661
Animals in Heaven
A cat and a mouse died on the same day and went up to Heaven. At the top they met God and he asked them ‘How do you like it so far?’ The mouse replied ‘It’s great, but can I get a pair of roller skates?’ God said ‘Sure’, and he gave him a pair of roller skates. The next day God saw the cat and asked him ‘How do you like it up here so far?’ and the cat replied ‘Great, I didn’t know you had meals on wheels up here!’ ENGLISH SADDLE STUBBEN SEIGFRIED, like new, two girths and irons $550 OBO, Coleville (530)402-6128 TIRED OF BEING DULL? I SHARPEN CHEFS knives, scissors of all types, clipper blades, clipper repair, TJ’S Sharpening (775)841-1079 PLUMBING, LEAKY PIPES, SERVICE AND REPAIR, Remodels, New Construction, Residential and Commercial, since 1997, Bonded and Insured. Guaranteed, NV#47214, CA#513872, Call Robert (775)690-1441 BLIND AND WINDOW CLEANING SERVICES, Residential and Commercial, Multi Story Specialist, Mobile Blind Cleaning, Pressure Washing, Awning Cleaning, Call Unlimited for a clear view! (775)883-6629
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How Are You?
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: ‘Hi, how are you?’ I’m not the type to start a conversation in the men’s restroom, but I don’t know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, ‘Doin’ just fine.’ And the other guy says: ‘So what are you up to?’ What kind of question is that? At that point, I’m thinking this is too bizarre so I say: ‘Uhhh, I’m like you, just traveling.’ At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question. ‘Can I come over?’ Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell him, ‘No........I’m a little busy right now!!!’ Then I hear the guy say nervously... ‘Listen, I’ll have to call you back. There’s an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions.’
Fly Swatter
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. “What are you doing?” She asked. “Hunting Flies.” He responded. “Oh! Are you killing any?” She asked. “Yep, 3 males, 2 females,” he replied. Intrigued, she asked ..... “How can you tell them apart?” He responded, “3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.” LG REFRIGERATOR, BOTTOM FREEZER, 24.7 cubic feet, stainless steel $2,500; chest freezer, excellent condition $125; solid oak, nook style dining set $200; solid oak computer center $150; full size bed with mattress $120; solid oak entertainment center $130, Dayton (562)2088888
PICTURE FRAMING FOR EVERY BUDGET - Let’s Make Framing Fun! No obligation design consultations. Sierra Custom Picture Framing, 1210 N. Carson Street, Carson City (775)883-5411
THOMAS J. BARTELS, HOROLOGIST, CLOCKS old and new repaired and restored. Authorized agent for Howard Miller, Ridgeway, and Sleigh, all work guaranteed! tomjbartels@gmail.com or (775)265-5541 or (775)901-1848
PERFECTO GARDENING SERVICES, SERVING Carson Valley over 20 Years! Tree and Bush trimming, Lawn care, Competitive Rates and all work guaranteed (775)265-7081
GENEALOGY - THOROUGH RESEARCH OF FAMILY histories. A unique gift for weddings, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays or yourself! www.PersonalPedigree.com or Lisa (775)450-3175
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” I Had It All!
This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless man. I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way. He said, “Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. I was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had full medical coverage.” I felt sorry for him, so I asked, “What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?” “Oh no, nothing like that,” he said. “No, no. I got out of prison.” HARDWOOD FLOORING WAREHOUSE CLEARANCE! Also Laminate, Vinyl Plank and Carpet at 20% - 50% off, Specials starting from .50 per square foot, Rogers Carpet One (775)267-2555 OUR BUSINESS IS GROWING! IRRIGATION, WaterBased Feeding, Tree Trimming, Cleanup, Hauling, Leafing! Winter Snow Removal and Maintenance, Pyramid Lawn Service Inc. Residential Lawn Care, Licensed and Bonded, Owned by Ruben Vargas (775)450-1197 or (775)220-8578
1994 BUICK CENTURY SPECIAL, PAST FEW years, new fuel pump, water pump, starter, radiator, serpentine belt, alternator, clean inside and out $1,000 (775)266-3357
GREG’S SMALL ENGINE SERVICE AND REPAIR! All Lawn Mowers, Snow Blowers, Portable Generators, Tillers, Shredders; On Site Pick-Up and Delivery, Serving Carson City, Carson Valley, Dayton, Alpine County, Virginia City - gregtenbroeck@yahoo.com or visit us at gregsmallengine.com (775)790-0435 or (530)307-1132
Holiday Craft Faire
SCI GRADING EXCAVATING ROAD WORK, House Pads, Drainage and Erosion Control, Septic Systems and Pumping, Wet and Dry Utilities, Demolition, Water and Dump Truck Service, NV#076958, CA#954210, Erik Viksna (530)306-2647 or (775)629-9000
Carson Valley United Methodist Church, Saturday, November 5th 9am-4pm, crafts, raffle baskets, silent auction, story time with Santa, kids market, bake shop, chili lunch, 1375 Centerville Rd, Gardnerville
Set your clocks back on November 6th!
FREE RIVER ROCK, MANY TONS, EXCELLENT condition, you load and remove, Bob/Wellington (775)7810244 JR’S POWER SPORTS! WE SERVICE, ALL Quads, Dirt, Street Bikes, Chainsaws, Snowmobiles, Generators, any gas powered machines, 30 years experience! Dayton, jrpowersports.com or (775)241-2530 BEAR BULLETS HAS MOVED! WE ARE NOW at 1506 US HWY 395 N. Gardnerville, NV., Reloading components, equipment and training. Remember, “we are just gun food!” Open Wednesday - Saturday 10am - 6pm and Sunday Noon - 5pm (775)392-3213 BRAND NEW SWING AWAY, OVER THE fender well, truck tool boxes, new over $500, sell $250, call between 8am-8pm (775)781-3767
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Don’t You Know Who I Am?
A few minutes before the church services started, the congregation was sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the back entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon the church was empty except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God’s ultimate enemy was in his presence. So Satan walked up to the man and said, ‘Do you know who I am?’ The man replied, ‘Yep, sure do.’ ‘Aren’t you afraid of me?’ Satan asked. ‘Nope, sure ain’t.’ said the man. ‘Don’t you realize I can kill you with one word?’ asked Satan. ‘Don’t doubt it for a minute, ‘ returned the old man, in an even tone. ‘Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying agony for all eternity?’ persisted Satan. ‘Yep,’ was the calm reply. ‘And you’re still not afraid?’ asked Satan. ‘Nope,’ said the old man. More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, ‘Why aren’t you afraid of me?’ The man calmly replied, ‘Been married to your sister for 48 years.’
RENEE’S UPHOLSTERY, FORMERLY OF SARAH’S, specializing in Motorcycle Seats, Furniture, Marine, Automotive, 20 years experience, rquell@sbcglobal.net or (775)530-3941 ELLA K. LADEN, CPA, PROFESSIONAL, PERSONALIZED Service for all of your Tax and Bookkeeping needs, Reasonable Rates, 25 Years Experience (775)392-0074
A Woman’s Prerogative...
Little Mary was at her first wedding and gaped at the entire ceremony. When it was over, she asked her mother, “Why did the lady change her mind?” Her mother replied, “What do you mean?” “Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another one.” PET CARE SERVICE! JODY WADDING, OWNER since 1991, References available, Boarding offered or visit your home; Horses, dogs, cats, reptiles, birds, fish… JWPetCare@aol.com (775)782-1212 or (775)781-1065 WOOD STOVE PELLETS, WE SELL PACIFIC Pellets, cleanest burning, highest heat output, out performs all others, ½ cord almond firewood, Benson Feed, Carson City (775)882-3999
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Douglas County Republican Women’s...
November meeting will be held on Wednesday, November 2nd at Carson Valley Inn, Minden. Assemblyman Jim Wheeler will be speaking on the ballot issues. Celeste M. Eckerman, DDS will be honored as our Entrepreneur of the Year. Dr. Eckerman is a member of the International Congress of Oral Implantologists and acquired her Minden practice in 2011. Doors open at 11am. Come early to view our boutique and/or purchase raffle tickets for gifts and a fifty-fifty drawing. Also, last chance to acquire 2016 campaign buttons and stickers. Buffet lunch begins at 11:45am. Cost is $20. Reservations are required! Pay at the door - cash or check accepted. Contact Debbie by October 28th at debbie.cutshaw@frontier.com or 775-265-1753. MASTER HOROLOGIST, CLOCK REPAIR, MUSEUM Quality Furniture, Chair Caning and Antique Everything Restoration, Grandfather Clock House Calls! A-1 Restorations since 1967, Larry (775)782-2422 HOME REPAIR PRO, MR. FIX IT, ANY OUTSIDE/INSIDE repairs, big or small, flat rate $35 per hour (775)6915119
Happy Veterans’ Day!- November 11th
Road Rage
An honest man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects. He said, “I’m very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the ‘Choose Life’ license plate holder, the ‘What Would Jesus Do’ bumper sticker, the ‘Follow Me to Sunday-School’ bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car.” FISH TANK, 20 GALLON, SITS ON WOOD cabinet with all the stuff included and hexagon 1-gallon tank with all the stuff $50 for everything (775)265-6482 GET READY FOR YOUR CPA – SAVE THE LAST minute scramble and paying high fees to your CPA to pull your 2016 books together, call Pro-Balanced Bookkeeping at (775)246-3363 LET US UNLOAD ON YOU! TOP SOIL, ROCK, DG, etc. Tight time line? We’re really fast! 30+ years experience, serving Carson and surrounding communities, Nevada Organics (775)882-9500
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Parenting with Purpose By Mary Jane Battista, Coleville, CA
Christmas is approximately 55 days away and let’s face it, most of us pause on Thanksgiving long enough to stuff ourselves more than the turkey we stuffed, say a quick “Thanks to God”, and jump directly into thoughts of Christmas shopping, decorating and the upcoming festivities of the season. If you will, focus on a few Christmas considerations for a moment. It may be helpful to decrease the season’s stress. Can we start with the subject of Jolly Old St. Nick, better known as Santa Claus? We sing about him and kids are vamboozled into believing the words, “he sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, he knows when you’ve been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.” What is true about that? Instead consider the truth that “the Lord looks down from heaven, he sees all the children of man from where he sits enthroned. He looks out on all the inhabitants of the earth, he who fashions the hearts of them all and observes their deeds. Psalm 33:13-15 So why give Santa the credit God deserves? If you feel Santa is a must for your family’s Christmas traditions, might I suggest that parents “fess up” and let your kids know that this legend is pretend and fun. Tell them the story of the real St. Nick who had a gift of giving and dressed up because he did not want anyone to know who was giving the gifts to those who had need. Somehow when kids go to Disney they enjoy the magic of the moment but realize Mickey and Minnie are fun but not real! They will realize the
same about Santa. Another point I would like to make on behalf of your child’s safety. Would you allow your child to sit on the lap of a complete stranger if he was not dressed up in a Santa Suit? “Just sayin”! Moving on to decorating. In Jeremiah chapter 10 of your Bible it describes what sounds to me like the tradition of putting up a Christmas tree. By reading this you could possibly interpret that putting up a Christmas tree is a form of idol worship. If Christ is not part of your Christmas celebration and the tree is your only focus that could be true. However, through the years our family has used decorating the Christmas tree as a time to spend together, making ornaments and having family time together. It has been a great time to remember each year the times and places the ornaments came from. Even now, my kids are grown but we still enjoy making ornaments and memories with our grandkids and as we decorate our tree every year we remember the Lord’s goodness to us. Time spent decorating could also be used as a time to get back to the basics of Christmas by focusing on the account in Matthew’s gospel. While you decorate, make known to your children God’s clear and concise intent for everyone to embrace no matter the season. “An angel of the Lord came to Joseph and said, “Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son and you shall call his Name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins. All this had taken place to fulfill what the prophet of the Lord had spoken saying, “behold
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Just the Thing!
A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the issues he has had getting a close shave around the cheeks. “I have just the thing,” says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. “Just place this between your cheek and gum.” The man places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech. “What happens if I swallow it?” “No problem,” says the barber. “Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does.” GOT DIRTY WINDOWS? ABC WINDOW CLEANERS, Mirrors, Gutter Cleaning, Re-screening, Pressure Washing, 30 Years Experience, NV#20161064184, CA#310507, Gardnerville resident (530)544-0590 UNIQUE GIFTS! VINTAGE ENTERTAINMENT system, turntable, receiver, AM/FM radio, dual cassette deck, pioneer speakers $425; Victorian loveseat $325; Victorian needlepoint side chair $125, Yerington (775)463-4440 LK TOWNE CONSTRUCTION, residential commercial, remodel kitchens and bathrooms, NV License #0042503 bonded Ken Towne owner (775)883-1256 or (775)720-8286
the virgin shall conceive and bear a son and He shall be called Immanuel which means God with us.” Matt 1:20-23 Quoting the words of Linus, “That’s what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown..” And now the shopping! It is probably the most stressful part of the season! We often feel pressured to buy gifts galore, spending more than we have. Take a deep breath and de-stress a bit with some advice I found on buzzheads.com. It is entitled The Four Christmas Gift Challenge. 1. Buy something they want. 2. Buy something they need. 3. Something to wear 4. Something to Read. My goal is to stick to this challenge and to buy less extravagant and less expensive gifts. How about you? Simplify and I can guarantee your family will be more likely to shine like the star of Bethlehem, sing like the heavenly angels and actually be able to rejoice in Christ’s birth. SHOWER/BATHTUB ENCLOSURES STARTING at $4,995, done with Sentrel Bath Systems, granite stone or marble look material. Figueroa’s Construction for your bathroom and kitchen/home improvements, Free Estimates, NV#58909, CA#678260 (775)782-3225 $200 OFF ANY COMPLETE ROOFING JOB, NEW roof, Re-roof, Repairs, 10% off for repairs, $100 maximum, must present ad for discount, Over 25 Years Experience, Licensed, Bonded and Insured, Tom Goldston Roofing, “Where Quality is Remembered Long After the Price is Forgotten” NV Lic#58203 (775)790-2461
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” BUY DIRECT! DECORATIVE ROCK, SAND, GRAVEL, D.G., Topsoil, Bark and Boulders, yard pick-up or delivery, Cinderlite, Serving all of Northern Nevada, Cinderlite.com or (775)882-4483 FORD 302 MOTOR WITH TRANSMISION, runs great $1,200 (775)781-7901 ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A GREAT ESCAPE close to home? Eagle Lake, Lassen County Vacation Rentals, Trophy Trout, All Water Sports, Furnished Cabins from $60 per night or $360 per week, visit our website at eaglelakeheri
Come Join us at Johnson Lane Baptist Church
Bible Believing, Gospel Preaching, Christ Loving Church, Sunday, 9:45am Sunday School, 11am Sunday Service, 5pm Evening Service, 1581 Johnson Lane, Minden (775)267-9590 ROASTED GARLIC JAM, SOLD AT SCOLARI’S Market, Carrols Corner, South Yerington, call for more information (775)846-8972 or (775)463-1265 MINOR TO MAJOR AUTOMOTIVE REPAIRS, Tires and More! ASE Certified Master Mechanic, 35 years same location! Senior Discounts, Bobs Shell Service, Carson City (775)883-7919
Codependents Anonymous
Cutting Class
READY FOR FALL CLEANUP AND MAINTENANCE? For a free estimate call James at Gardnerville Green, gardnervillegreen@gmail.com or (775)450-0082
A teacher reprimanded the teenager in the hall, “do you mind telling me whose class you’re cutting this time?” “Like,” the young teen replied, “uh, see, okay, like it’s like I really don’t like think like that’s really important, y’know, like because I’m y’know, like I don’t get anything out of it.” “It’s your English class, isn’t it?” replied the smiling teacher.
CLEAR THE CLUTTER! HARRY’S HAULING, pianos, spas, safes or anything else, serving the Carson Valley communities (775)291-6648
1966 ALUMINUM HULL 17’ SMITH CRAFT WITH trailer, 80 horse Evinrude outboard with trolling motor and fish finder $1,500 OBO (775) 265-0742
Little League Baseball Game
JOB FAIRS! INTERVIEWS! Are you prepared? A great resume is your key to success. Military discount. (DD214 required) Call The Resume Business now! (775)267-2711
CoDA “Developing Healthy Relationships” Carson City, Sparks and Kings Beach, visit www.coda.org or call for details, Al at (775)882-0884 or Bob C. (775)720-1040
As I was driving home from work one day, I stopped to watch a local Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first-base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was. “We’re behind 14 to nothing,” he answered with a smile. “Really,” I said. “I have to say you don’t look very discouraged.” “Discouraged?” the boy asked with a puzzled look on his face. “Why should we be discouraged? We haven’t been up to bat yet.”
Happy Thanksgiving!!- November 24th
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Carson Valley Art Association Art Show
November 4th – 6th, CVIC Hall, Minden. Reception with raffle, silent auction, November 4th, 6pm-8pm. Bring this Scoop ad to Art Show for one free raffle ticket (775)782-7074 LOBO ROOFING, SERVING NORTHERN NEVADA since 1993, Financing Available! Licensed, Bonded and Insured, Senior Citizen Discounts, Mobile Home, Residential and Commercial, Lic#K0011, NVLic#0070178 (775)342-8969
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Home, Jewelry, Health and Beauty Stop N Shop
Free admission! Everyone receives discounts! 56+ prizes worth $1,800+ 9am-3pm, Saturday, November 12th, Carson Plaza Hotel 211 E 9th, Carson City. Fundraiser: earn tickets for extra prizes with donations of gloves and socks for Northern Nevada Dream Center. Facebook “CC Stop N Shop” (775)250-4424 READ “CABIN IN THE MEADOW” OR “SHIP IN THE Desert” - Jay Crowley. Buy on Amazon, Genoa Store or contact jaycrowleybooks@gmail.com. Support your local author MAINTENANCE FREE DECKS AND PATIO COVERS, knowledgeable, honest, professional service! Serving Northern Nevada for 18+ years! Free Quotes! K & C Construction, NV#0079034 (775)691-6462
Where Ya From?
Final Requests
An elderly woman decided to prepare her will. She told her minister she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. “Walmart!” the minister exclaimed. “Why Wal-Mart?” “Then I’ll be sure my daughter will visit me twice a week.” RUPERT’S GEMCUTTING AND JEWELRY- UNIQUE Gifts, Custom Designing, Repairs. Specializing in Natural Stones and Precious Gemstone Jewelry, Carson City (775)882-5988 PUBLISHER’S NOTICE: All real estate advertising in this paper is subject to the Fair Housing Act which makes it illegal to advertise “any preference, limitations or discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status or national origin, or an intention to make any such preference, limitation or discrimination.” This magazine will not knowingly accept any advertisement for real estate which is a violation of the law; our readers are hereby informed that all dwellings advertised in this publication are available on an equal opportunity basis. To complain of discrimination call HUD toll-free. CHIZEK CONCRETE PUMPING, GROUT AND 3/4 line pump; Residential and commercial, prompt, dependable service, Brad (775)721-0055 DON’T HUMP IT, PUMP IT!
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A man was sprawled across three entire seats in a theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, “Sorry sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The man groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became impatient. “Sir,” the usher said, “if you don’t get up from there, I’m going to have to call the manager.” Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager. In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly. “All right, buddy. What’s your name?” “Sam,” the man moaned. “Where ya from, Sam?” the cop asked. “The balcony.” MKD CONSTRUCTION, GENERAL ENGINEERING, concrete structures, concrete flat work, grading, roadway improvements, drainage, storm drains, underground utilities (water and sewer), paving, fencing, barrier rail, environmental improvements, Commercial and Residential Snow Removal, Excellent Reputation and References Available, NV#50061 and CA#818376, Mike (775)2461900 or (775)315-2416 ALLERGIES AND DUST A PROBLEM? WHOLE house air duct cleaning special $399, all vents, returns, heater and ac cleaned and sanitized, dryer vent cleaning $99, call Peake Air, NV#260831 (775)392-0994 TANGLES HAIR STUDIO AND NAILS, specializing in creative color and cuts; Men, Women and Children, Walkins Welcome! Follow us on Facebook, 1255 US Hwy. 395N, Gardnerville, (775)782-2742
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A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
Carson Valley Community Theatre is holding auditions for “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum” on December 1st at 6pm and December 3rd at 10am with call backs on December 4th at 1pm at CVCT’s “The Annex” - 1572 Highway 395 (corner of County Road), Minden. Please prepare a one-minute song (bring sheet music or CD for accompaniment). Auditions will also consist of cold readings from the script. Dancers are needed for Courtesan roles. Dancers are not required to audition with a song, but are encouraged to do so if they want to be considered for other roles. Anyone with a special talent, such as acrobatics, juggling or gymnastics is encouraged to audition. CVCT does not pre-cast; all roles are open. Show Dates are March 10th, 11th, 12th, 17th, 18th, 19th, 24th, 25th, and 26th. Anyone cast in the show is required to be available March 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, 16th and all show dates. We are also in need of tech crew, setbuild crew and help with costume sewing. Everyone is welcome to audition! For more information, please call Lucille at (775)843-3493. WOOD STOVES - PELLET STOVES New/Reconditioned starting at $800 while supplies last. Showroom hours 9am to 4pm Monday thru Friday, 63 Laxalt Dr. Mound House, NV, www.bbqsandfireplaces.com or (775)241-2609
THE PURPLE AVOCADO GREAT GIFTS! Come see why we’re voted #1 Best Gift Shop! 904 N. Curry Street, Carson City or visit our website at thepurpleavocado.com or (775)883-6233
Happy November Birthdays!
May your special day bring plenty of excitement, fun and appreciation from those who love you. We wish that for every extra candle on your cake, you receive an extra reason to smile! Happy Birthday! GLOCK 42 .380 SEMI-AUTOMATIC pistol, new case, extra magazine, lock, cleaning tool and all paperwork $400, personal sale, no dealer paperwork (775)220-2185 IS WINDOW CLEANING A PAIN? 40 YEARS EXPERIENCE, licensed and insured, Dave Adams Window Cleaning call for an over the phone price! “The science of perfection” (775)241-2318 HAVING A SPECIAL EVENT OR BENEFIT? Like high energy piano? I’m your man! Listen live at randyidemusic.net, quality entertainment at an affordable price (775)848-6118
Support Small Business SaturdayNovember 26th!
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” ACME BOAT & RV STORAGE – RESIDENT MANAGER, fenced, lighted, lowest rates around, Gardnerville (775)265-4766
So Attractive!
Two life-long friends were enjoying a few drinks down at the local bar, when one said to the other: “If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me honestly?” “Yeah, sure thing,” replied his friend, “fire away.” “Well,” said the first guy, “why do you think all the guys around here find my wife so attractive?” “It’s probably because of her speech impediment,” replied the second guy. “What do you mean her speech impediment?” inquired the first fellow. “My wife doesn’t have a speech impediment!” “Well,” replied his friend, “you must be the only guy who hasn’t noticed that she can’t say ‘NO’!” 2001 FORD WINDSTAR, LOW MILEAGE $4,500 (775)790-1142 or (775)691-9364 WE’RE EASY TO GET A LAWN WITH! YARD clean up, weekly mowing, sprinkler repair and much more, HIM Quality Lawns (775)229-3018
Visit With Us Online at sierrascoop.com Volunteer Fire Department...
A fire started on some grasslands near a farm. The county fire department was called to put out the fire. The fire was more than the county fire department could handle. Someone suggested that a nearby volunteer bunch be called. Despite some doubt that the volunteer outfit would be of any assistance, the call was made. The volunteers arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They rumbled straight towards the fire, drove right into the middle of the flames and stopped! The firemen jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all directions. Soon they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two easily-controlled parts. Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department’s work and was so grateful that his farm had been spared, that right there on the spot he presented the volunteers with a check for $1,000. A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds. “That ought to be obvious,” he responded, wiping ashes off his coat. “The first thing we’re gonna do is get the brakes fixed on our fire truck!” REDUCE YOUR ENERGY COST! ATTIC blown in insulation, Residential and Commercial, licensed and bonded, 27 years experience, For your free estimate call BGS NV#58410, NV#58411 (775)782-9192
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Daily Visitor
There was a woman who was a daily visitor to the local coffee shop, coming in every day to order breakfast. She seemed to be over 80 years old, and was a quiet, tranquil person who minded her own business. At first, the servers thought that she was coming in alone. Finally, though, they noticed that she brought a picture in every day and set it up on the table facing her while she ate. There was a man in the photo – her late husband. She was still bringing him along to have breakfast together, just like they’d probably shared breakfast for many decades before he passed on. It was the most moving display of love and devotion that the servers had seen in a long time. It really touched their hearts deeply – and we’re sure it’ll touch yours, too. VENDORS, CHESHIRE ANTIQUES HAS SPACE Available! 12,000 square foot store, furniture, jewelry, repurposed and more. Contact Karen, 1423 Hwy 395, Gardnerville (775)782-9117 Writing the Editor - We welcome all articles, letters, jokes and comments on Sierra Scoop, local issues, community news and free private party ads, published as space provides. These articles, letters, comments do not necessarily reflect our opinion. All public input is welcome. sierrascoop@charter.net, Phone/Fax (775)782-4520
Tien Hsieh in Concert
The Carson Valley Arts Council will present Tien Hsieh in concert at the Douglas County Community Center, on Friday, November 18th, 2016. Join us for an evening of electrifying classical music. Tickets are $18 in advance; $24 at the door; Kids under 18 are free. For information or to purchase tickets, visit www.cvartscouncil.com or call (775)782-8207. Listen to her music at www.tienhsieh.com PIONEER GLASS PLUS, RESIDENTIAL, COMMERCIAL, Emergency Services, Fair Prices, Dependable Quick Service, Quality work, 45 years experience, Frank Boudreau, owner NV#7876 (775)720-2373 GUNSMITHING SERVICES, CLEANING, REPAIR, Customizing, Federal Nevada License, Thom’s Gun Shop, Wellington (775)266-3136 HANDCRAFTED MARKERS AND MONUMENTS, Granite and Bronze. Large Selection of colors and designs, special orders welcome! 15 years experience, call Cornerstone Monument for appointment (775)267-1958 HANDYMAN SERVICE – HOME REPAIRS, FENCING Repair/Replacement, Hauling, Trash Removal, Shrub and Tree Trimming and Removal, and Weed Removal, Free Estimates (775)781-1747
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Horoscope Humor...
How many members of your sign does it take to change a light bulb? Aries: Just one. You want to make something of it? Taurus: One, but just try to convince them that the burnedout bulb is useless and should be thrown away. Gemini: Two, but the job never gets done-they just keep discussing who is supposed to do it and how it’s supposed to be done! Cancer: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grieving process. Leo: Leos don’t change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo in to do the job for them while they’re out. Virgo: Approximately 1.000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth. Libra: ER, two. Or maybe one. No, on second thought, make that two. Is that OK with you? Scorpio: That information is strictly secret and shared only with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical Order. Sagittarius: The sun is shining, the day is young, we’ve got our whole lives ahead of us, and you’re inside worrying about a stupid burned- out light bulb? Capricorn: I don’t waste my time with these childish jokes. Aquarius: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so.... Pisces: Light bulb? What light bulb?
Gold Canyon Café Now Open in Dayton
Under new ownership and management. American, Mexican and Hawaiian style cuisine. Hours of operation are Tuesday–Thursday, 4pm-8pm, Friday and Saturday, 4pm-10pm, closed Sunday and Monday. Opening for lunch soon, 160 Main Street, Dayton (775)434-7068 HANDYMAN SERVICES, WOOD DECK RESURFACING and repair, interior doors, windows and interior/ exterior trim, Honey-Do’s, etc. Serving Carson Valley (775)315-2235 PIANO AND ORGAN PRIVATE INSTRUCTIONS, Member of Sierra Organ Club, Call Joanne Booth in Sunridge, Carson City (775)267-2429 NORDICTRACK PRO SKI EXERCISE MACHINE, excellent condition $200 (775) 266-4648 G & J LANDSCAPING MAINTENANCE, TRIM, Prune, Fertilize, Aerate, Sprinklers, Summer Clean-up, Free Estimates, Victor (775)291-1672 NORTHERN NEVADA BOER GOATS, HOME of Champion Producing Sire Sudden Impact, Full Bloods Purebreds Percentages Kids available now, ichwawa395@aol. com, northernnvboergoats.com (775)781-0243
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NEW, PREMIUM MOHAWK “VICTORIAN LINEN” carpet pieces (2’x14’ 5½’x15½’ and 7½’ x12’) includes Stainmaster pad $250 (775)265-7578 ALPINE TREE SERVICE - TRIMMING, REMOVAL, grinding and lot clearing, no job too small, Licensed, Insured and over 35 years experience (775)721-2880
Veteran’s Day Prayer
Dear Lord, Today we honor our veterans, worthy men and women who gave their best when they were called upon to serve and protect their country. We pray that you will bless them, Lord, for their unselfish service in the continual struggle to preserve our freedoms, our safety, and our country’s heritage, for all of us. Bless them abundantly for the hardships they faced, for the sacrifices they made for their many different contributions to America’s victories over tyranny and oppression. We respect them, we thank them, we honor them, we are proud of them, and we pray that you will watch over these special people and bless them with peace and happiness. In Jesus’ name we pray; Amen VOICE AND PIANO LESSONS, BEGINNER to Advanced students, experienced teacher, performer, music degree. Call The Songlady! Carolyn Lancaster (775)7201918 or (775)267-2582
Advent Begins-November 27th
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” If a Dog Were Your Teacher
These are some of the lessons you might learn... When loved ones come home, always run to greet them. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy. When it’s in your best interest practice obedience. Let others know when they’ve invaded your territory. Take naps and stretch before rising. Run romp and play daily. Thrive on attention and let people touch you. Avoid biting, when a simple growl will do. On warm days stop to lie on your back on the grass. On hot days drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree. When you’re happy dance around and wag your entire body. No matter how often you’re scolded don’t buy into the guilt thing and pout.Run right back and make friends. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough. Be loyal Never pretend to be something you’re not. If what you want lies buried dig until you find it. When someone is having a bad day, be silent ........sit close by ...and nuzzle them gently. CUSTOM CANVAS WORK! REPAIR, RE-STITCH, Replace; Boat Covers, Cockpit and Bow Covers, Spa Sun Covers and Patio Shade; Snaps, Grommets, Velcro, Zippers, Reinforcements, Jim/Minden (775)267-4434 or (775)230-8706
Douglas County Animal Shelter
Open Sundays, Adoptions Only! Staffed by DAWG volunteers, come see our selection of available dogs and cats, 921 Pinenut Road, Gardnerville (775)720-9597 FIREWOOD, ALMOND, CHERRY AND WALNUT, mixed, seasoned, split, $380 a cord, Almond only $425 a cord, delivery available, Jon (775)246-7186 SMITH VALLEY IRRIGATION – SERVING NEVADA and Sierra Communities for 38 Years with Ag Irrigation Systems and Parts (775)465-2316
An Ideal Marriage
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn’t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn’t have to hear about the way his mother cooked. USA DRYWALL, REMODELS AND REPAIRS, Hanging, Taping, any texture, Additions, No Job too small, Insured and Bonded, NV#59981 (775)247-2539 LANCASTER CONSTRUCTION, WE SPECIALIZE in Re-leveling Mobile Homes, also replacing old metal exterior doors with new residential doors. Give Phil Lancaster a call to schedule an appointment (775)720-4319 or (775)782-8785
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com ASPEN ROOFING INC. FREE ESTIMATES, ALL types, Re-roofs, New and Repairs, NV#0069418, Insured and Bonded, Chris (775)230-8174
Out of the Mouths of Babes
Nudity - I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, “Mom! That lady isn’t wearing a seat belt!” Honesty - My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he’d dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, “We better throw this one out too then, ‘cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.” Ketchup - A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. “It’s the minister, Mommy,” the child said to her mother. Then she added, “Mommy can’t come to the phone to talk to you right now. She’s hitting the bottle.” More Nudity - A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, “What’s the matter haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?” Elderly - While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, “The tooth fairy will never believe this!” Dress-Up - A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, “Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that suit.” “And why not, darling?” “You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.” School - A little girl had just finished her first week of school. “I’m just wasting my time,” she said to her mother. “I can’t read, I can’t write and they won’t let me talk!” Bible - A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. “Mama, look what I found”, the boy called out.” What have you got there, dear?” With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered, “I think it’s Adam’s underwear.” HIGH DESERT BARNS, CUSTOM STEEL BUILDINGS, Horse Shelters, Quality Barns built with 25 years of experience, highdesertbarns.com or (775)246-3004
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” “A MOVING EXPERIENCE” - MOVE ASSISTANCE, 25 years experience, Senior Discounts! Ken Jeter, kenjeter@sbcglobal.net or (775)530-8932 or (775)884-3906
In the Offering
One Sunday a pastor told the congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had placed a $1,000 bill in offering. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he’d like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly and saintly lady all the way in the back shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, “I’ll take him and him and him.” MAYTAG DRYER, CONVERTED TO LP, GOOD condition $50, Yerington (775)463-2351
Flying Pig Flea Market
Be a vendor, come to browse, November 12th and December 10th, 8am-3pm, Fuji Park Building, Carson City, for information call (775)882-4717 or (775)315-0008 HIGH ROLLERS PAINTING FOR ALL YOUR PAINTING needs and drywall repairs! Competitive rates and quality workmanship, bonded and insured, NV#44048, highrollerspainting.net or (775)267-2534 MIGUEL’S GARDEN SERVICE, FULL LAWN MAINTENANCE, clean up, fertilizing, dead shrubs and trees pulled out, excellent references, great rates, serving Carson Valley over 26 years! (775)265-0501
You Know...
One time at this party I walked up to a stunning golden-haired woman and said, “You know, gentlemen prefer blondes.” She smiled a coy smile and answered, “You know, I’m not really a blonde.” I smiled, “Good. I’m not really a gentleman.” BARELY USED, PURPLE NOVA ROLLING Walker, large seat with storage underneath, folds easily, weighs 16 pounds, locking handbrakes, approximate user height 5’4” – 6’1” $70 775-901-6320
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The publisher does not assume any responsibility for the contents of any advertising herein, and all representation or warranties made in such advertising are those of the advertisers and not the publishers. ELECTRICAL PROBLEMS? MAKE THEM GO away! No job too small! New construction, remodels, service and repair, Pigman Electric, NV#73243, CA#610417 (775)7219491 14’ TRAILER TOY HAULER WITH SIDE AND rear ramps and brakes, excellent condition $2,500 (775)7901142 or (775)691-9364
Compulsive Eaters Anonymous
A program to address compulsive eating; ALL are welcome. Mondays 5:15pm, Tuesdays 10am and Thursdays 5:15pm at St. Peter’s Episcopal Church, 314 N. Division St. Carson City. Contact (775)400-0098. GREAT HAIR DOESN’T HAPPEN BY CHANCE. It happens by appointment! Hair by Candi at C and Company, Minden, try something new, call now (775)434-4921 JANS TROPICS AND ELEGANT POOCH, 50 YEARS serving Carson! Dog and Cat Grooming, Pet Supplies and Tropical Fish, 1000 Corbett St., Carson City (775)8825659 or (775)882-4928
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Could Have Been Here Sooner!
An elderly couple died in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. “Here is your ocean-side condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area.” “Heck, Gloria,” the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, “we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn’t heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!” CD’S, ROLLING STONES, LED Zeppelin, Pink Floyd and more, in new condition $3 each 775-782-7476 MIKES HORSESHOEING SERVICE, 30 YEARS Experience! Serving Carson Valley and Surrounding Areas! Mike Romine (775)350-0351
Say It with Flowers...
A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that displayed a large sign that read “Say It with Flowers.” “Wrap up one rose,” he told the florist. “Only one?” the florist asked. “Just one,” the customer replied. “I’m a man of few words.” WILL TEAR DOWN AND BUY OLD WOODEN Barns and Barn Wood! Insured and bonded (775)782-9192
Glittery Fruits Craft for Kids
You will need: Ribbon, Kitchen foil, Tissue paper scraps in yellow, green and red, PVA glue, and Glitter. Instructions: Tie a knot in your ribbon so it forms a loop. You need to make this loop longer than you want your finished “fruit” to be so there will be enough at the top to hang it. Rip off some foil and shape it around the ribbon so the knot sits at the bottom and there is a loop at the top. Shape the foil into an apple or pear shape, squeezing it tightly. It might take a little while to get a shape that you are happy with. Dip scraps of the appropriately colored tissue paper in the glue and use them to cover your fruit. When your fruit is completely covered sprinkle with glitter. Hang your fruit up or place carefully in a bowl to display. TAYLOR GRAPHITE GOLF CLUBS, right handed, bag included, good used condition $50 775-392-0085 BUYING OR SELLING REAL ESTATE? LET AN experienced, professional realtor guide you to a successful outcome. Contact Jim Darrough of Realty Executives, he can and will help you, nvrebroker@charter.net or (775)7904848 FOUR PIECE SECTIONAL WITH POWER RECLINERS, black leather, new condition, paid $1,800, sell for $900 (775)392-3130
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LARRY’S TRACTOR SERVICE, CLEANUP WORK, rototilling, backhoe, box scraper, dump trailer, rake, hole drilling, affordable rates (775)267-2245 or (775)690-4632 PROFESSIONAL LICENSED CAREGIVER SEEKING Employment in Minden, Gardnerville and surrounding areas. Around the clock care available! Certified in CPR, Emergency First Aid, Alzheimer’s, Dementia, Aging and Personal Care (775)901-3864
Remember When...
in 2009, our president promised his government healthcare overhaul would not threaten personal insurance plans? “No matter how we reform health care, we will keep this promise: If you like your doctor, you will be able to keep your doctor, period. If you like your health care plan, you will be able to keep your health care plan. Period,” he claimed. “No one will take it away. No matter what.” CRAFTSMAN ROTORY MULCHING MOWER $50; two padded black iron bar stools with high back and swivels $75 each; 15” Sharp flat screen television $45, Gardnerville (760)937-7111 GOT WOOD? SAMMY’S FIREWOOD, HONEST Quality Service, soft and hard wood, delivery available, located in Carson City, (775)315-0834
WNC Driver Education
WNC offers a 30 Hour New Driver Education classes throughout the fall of 2016. In person class fee is $100. Fall in-person classes run four Saturdays in a row, extending an additional Saturday if one of the Saturdays falls on a legal holiday. Winter break classes will be held Tuesday - Friday. All in person class times are 8:30am-4:30pm with a 30-minute lunch break. Also included in our classes are guest speakers, when available are - law enforcement, insurance agents, DMV and sometimes a tire representative. Two things to remember all new drivers under the age of 18 MUST take a 30-Hour New Driver Education class to obtain a Nevada Driver’s License and most insurance companies will offer a discount upon successful completion of our nationally recognized Drive Right program. Carson City - November 19th, 2016 and December 27th 30th, 2016. Douglas - November 19th, 2016 and December 27th - 30th, 2016. Fallon - December 27th – 30th, 2016. Fernley December 3rd, 2016 and January 3rd -6th, 2017 WNC continues to offer an on-line 30-Hour New Driver Education course. Cost $90 and students have up to 60 days to complete the course. Register at www.campusce.net/wnc/ or call (775)445-4463
Call (775)782-4520 To Place Your Ad!
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Remain Independent – Remain at Home
The “little things” may become increasingly difficult as we age, but this doesn’t mean it’s time to surrender. We provide affordable, non-medical assistance for seniors at home. Light housekeeping, meal prep, bathing/grooming, companionship, family relief, and incidental transportation to appointments. A few hours to 24/7 care. Eden Home Care, eden-homecare. com (775)392-2000 PAINTING INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR, STAINING, faux and fine finishes, free estimates, Powers Painting, NV#68615, powerspainting.org or (775)781-5531 or (775)315-5179 OLDIE BUT A GOODIE! 1997 GMC YUKON 1500 SLT, one owner, kept in garage, dark blue leather, tires okay, 239,185 miles $2,500 (775)465-9088 QUALITY QUILTS, CREATIVE CLOTH, FREE motion custom quilting, pantographs, and line designs to enhance your own quilt tops. Quilting and sewing classes, custom orders, private lessons, find us on Facebook (775)691-0533
Prayer Of Gratitude By Barbara from Bishop
FISHING POLES; WADERS/NEW IN BOX XXL $40; 4 ton hydraulic up right 1950’s floor jack, old antique welder $10 775-342-9718
Brain Teaser Answers
1. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry. 2. Money. 3. The Maid did! Because she said she was dusting in the corners. But the Smiths own a CIRCULAR house! 4. Although the guards were looking in opposite directions, they were not back to back. They were facing each other. D R LANDSCAPING, DEFENSIBLE SPACE, TREE work and yard cleanups, sprinkler repairs and weed abatement, snow removal, house and garage clean ups, Dave (775)671-0808
For family, friends, and strangers, too; for early morning skies of blue; For faithful pets that sleep nearby; for a newborn baby’s precious cry; For trees that shade in summer’s heat and butterflies that come to greet; For autumn’s coolness in the air and colors calling us to share; For snowflakes that the winter brings and new life in the early spring; For eyes to see and ears to hear and arms to hold the ones so dear; For stars that dance in nighttime sky; for valleys low and mountains high; For every little bird that sings… Thank you Lord, for everything! Amen NORDICTRACK CX1055 ELLIPTICAL, perfect condition $300 (775)790-1142 or (775)691-9364 COMPUTER PROBLEMS? ON SITE REPAIR and Training, PC and Network Configuration, Virus and Spyware removal, Serving Dayton and Carson, justin.nelson@goowy.com or call Justin (775)450-3735 WANTED! 1980’S DIESEL SUBURBAN PLEASE call 775-901-0717
PORSCHES WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE! OLD Porsches 1950 to 1973, looking for a Porsche 356, 911 or 912, running or not, with or without engine or transmission, also interested in parts. Will pay cash! Have trailer will travel (775)291-6827
EXPERIENCED HOT TUB REPAIR AND MAINTENANCE, monthly/bi-monthly, new custom covers available! Serving Carson Valley area, Carson Spa Care (775)230-5328
SEW-WHAT UPHOLSTERY, SPECIALIZING IN Antiques and Leather, bring the life back to which it deserves, 40+ years experience, Carson Valley, Leslie (775)901-2035
RENNER’S TRUE VALUE HARDWARE; Plumbing, Electrical, Post and Fence, Pre-mix Cement Bags, Toys, Pet Food, Household Cleaners, we have everything you need! Smith Valley, Wellington, TRE (775)465-2217
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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