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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
MOBILE COMPUTER REPAIR AND SERVICE - Quality work performed in-shop, in office or in-home. Dependable, affordable! Over 17+ Years Experience. Proudly serving Carson Valley and Surrounding Communities. Call Nick at Technologic Computer Repair (775)450-7570 AMMO, MOST PISTOL CALIBERS, CALL FOR PRICES. AFR (775)720-6076 BLIND AND WINDOW CLEANING SERVICES, residential and commercial, multi story specialist, mobile blind cleaning, pressure washing, awning cleaning, snow removal, Call Unlimited for a clear view! (775)883-6629 TWIN BED, ELECTRIC LIFT HEAD AND FOOT, includes mattress, foam topper. Gently used $100, Carson City (775)762-2210 USA DRYWALL, REMODELS AND REPAIRS, Hanging, Taping, any texture, Additions, No Job too small, Insured and Bonded, NV#59981 (775)247-2539 ANTIQUE TIGER STRIPE OAK DRESSER WITH mirror great condition Paid $795.00 First $350 takes; Husqvarna 460 Rancher chain saw, only 10 hours usage, currently selling for $569, asking $350 (775)782-3770 WANTED! COMIC BOOKS AND/OR SPORTS CARDS, I can come to you (562)706-4224
As I grow older, I pay less attention to what people say…I just watch what they do. MONUMENTS UNLIMITED, HEADSTONES, curbing, granite and concrete, all colors available, quality work (775)720-1627 HONDA 250CC CBR STREET BIKE WITH 13,000 miles excellent condition $3,000 OBO - contact Pat (775)781-2273 RENT ME FOR SPRING CLEANING, PUT A roll-off dumpster at your home, you load, we remove (775)297-2320
Maturing Puppy Love
Three years after the honeymoon it appears their puppy love had matured. “You don’t love me anymore,” she sobbed. “You use to be so nice to me, and now you are always barking and growling.” “What do you expect,” he demanded. “You’ve always got me in the doghouse.” C-THRU WINDOW CLEANING, “WINDOW CLEANING at its finest”, Call Casey (775)350-8021 NEED MORE PARKING? GARAGE SOLUTION. Turn your 2 car garage into a 3 or 4 car garage! Call Al for details (775)781-1747
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” How to walk a Human- A Dogs Guide
Sneeze into your elbow, not your hand. Please.
When you feel a sneeze or a cough coming on, covering your mouth prevents the spread of infectious germs. You probably knew that. But the way you cover up also matters, and there are plenty of people who haven’t yet heard the consensus guidance of health officials: If no tissue is available, you should aim into your elbow, not your hand. Even if that means breaking a longheld habit. “If somebody sneezes into their hands, that creates an opportunity for those germs to be passed on to other people, or contaminate other objects that people touch,” said Dr. Vincent Hill, chief of the waterborne disease prevention branch of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Germs are most commonly spread by the respiratory droplets emitted from sneezing and coughing. When they land on your hands, they’re transmitted to things like door knobs, elevator buttons and other surfaces the people around you are likely to also touch. SUGAR PLUM HOUSEKEEPING, LICENSED, Bonded and insured with references, Free estimates, great cleaning, fair prices, Samantha (775)220-4252 2011 CHEVY SUBURBAN 3RD ROW SEAT FITS 20072011, dark cloth upholstery, excellent condition $350, Tom/ Carson City (831)359-5793
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Humans need exercise. If they don’t get enough of it, they become sluggish, overweight and out of shape. It’s up to you to save them from this tragedy. Allow your human to tether themselves to you. This keeps them from wandering off or running away. Your human will need a sniff break in the shade now and then. Don’t forget and just “March On” for the walk. Give your human a break. You need to bark at others now and then, this keeps your human focused on the walk. Humans have short attention spans. When you need to go potty, just go… then walk away. Most likely, if trained correctly, your human will come over and pick it right up. They seem to enjoy this exercise. When your human isn’t paying attention, start pulling hard away from your human. This a is great power and balance training exercise for your human. When you first start the walk, make sure you stop to sniff and pee every 3 feet. This will let your human know that you are in charge of the walk! When your human starts leading in front to much, just stop. Sit down, put the brakes on. This will teach your human to go where you want to go and again, show who’s in charge here. Once you see you are almost home, slow down and walk nice and easy with your human. Make it a great experience when you return home. Humans have short memories, they will only remember the last 2 minutes of the walk and will take you out again soon because of positive reinforcement. Make sure you act and are excited when the leash is taken off of you. This is a bonus training marker. Your human will respond very well to you and most likely run to get you a treat while talking in that high pitch tone they are fond of. This is the sound they make when they are happy. (author unknown) HOT TUB SERVICE, WEEKLY AND BI WEEKLY service, reasonable rates, private homes and vacation rentals, hot tub cover sales, call Tahoe Sierra Hot Tubs (775)267-2490 HOME IN NEED OF IMPROVEMENT? ADDITIONS, remodels, garages, we do it all! Free estimates, 21 years experience, Carson Valley Construction Company LLC, NV#0074855 (775)291-1453
Act 2 Looking for you to view
2000 sq. ft. of gently used merchandise, reasonably priced for your Springtime shopping, 607 S. Main St. Yerington, hours are flexible call Pat Riley (408)804-4010 or Toni Harrisson (775)781-6487 BERETTA BOBCAT 22LR PISTOL WITH SNEAKY Pete holster, 2 magazines, 100 rounds, FFL required, $400, Bill (775)220-0492 PAINTING BY ART - STAINING AND PAINTING done at affordable rates, personal service with 20 years experience, call for free estimate, Gardnerville (775)392-3997 Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
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Do you remember any of these?
Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe - Counting-Out Rhyme -Eenie, meenie, miney, moe, Catch a tiger by the toe. If he hollers, let him go. My mother said to pick The very best one And you are not it. A Flea and a Fly - Tongue Twister A flea and a fly Flew up in a flue. Said the flea, “Let us fly!” Said the fly, “Let us flee!” So they flew through A flaw in the flue. A Canner Can Can - Limerick - A canner exceedingly canny, One morning remarked to his granny: “A canner can can Anything that he can, But a canner can’t can a can, can he? Cinderella Dressed in Yellow - Jump Rope Rhyme - Cinderella Dressed in yellow Went to kiss a prince, By mistake, Kissed a snake. How many doctors Did it take, Was it, One! Two! Three! Four! Five… Down by the Station - Children’s Song - Down by the station early in the morning, See the little pufferbellies all in a row. See the engine driver pull the little handle, Puff, puff, Toot! Toot! Off we go. Fee, Fie, Fo, Fum - Nursery Rhyme -Fee, Fie, Fo, Fum I smell the blood of an Englishman Be he alive, or be he dead, I’ll grind his bones to make my bread. Good Morning, Merry Sunshine - Poem - Good morning, Merry Sunshine! How do you wake so soon? You’ve frightened all the stars away and shined away the moon. I saw you go to sleep last night, before I stopped my playing. How did you get way over there and where have you been staying?
I never go to sleep, Dear Child, I just go round to see The little children of the East who rise and watch for me. I waken all the birds and trees and flowers on my way And then, come back to see the child who stayed out late to play. I’m Rubber, You’re Glue - Chant - I’m Rubber, You’re Glue! Bounces off of me And sticks to you! I Have Something in My Pocket - Girl Scout Song - I’ve got something in my pocket, That belongs across my face. And I keep it very close to me, In a most convenient place! I bet you’ll never guess it If you guessed a long, long while, So I’ll take it out and put it on, It’s a great big, beautiful smile! I’m Popeye the Sailor Man - Children’s Song - I’m Popeye the sailor man, I live in a garbage can. I eat all the worms, And spit out the germs, I’m Popeye the sailor man. Sports Chant - Rah rah ree, Kick ‘em in the knee, Rah rah rass Kick ‘em in the other knee! PAINTER, SEMI-RETIRED WITH 40+ YEARS experience in Nevada, Save Money, Get Seasonal Discount Now, inside or out, Fences (775)901-1912 We have fought for our freedom, then we accumulate laws to take it away. PART TIME EMPLOYMENT, NON-PROFIT AGENCY; flexible hours working with seniors. Positions available in Topaz, Coleville, Walker and Bridgeport, California. Call for more information (530)495-2700
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Something to ponder as we age
The inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54. The inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57. The world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41. The best soccer player in the world, Maradona, died at the age of 60. And then...KFC inventor died at 94. Inventor of Nutella brand died at the age of 88. Cigarette maker Winston died at the age of 102. The inventor of opium died at the age of 116 - in an earthquake Hennessy Cognac, Irish inventor, died at 98. How did doctors come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life? The rabbit is always jumping, but it lives for only 2 years. The turtle that doesn’t exercise at all, lives 200 years. So have a drink ...Take a nap ...And when you wake up have some bacon and eggs. THE CHICKS HAVE ARRIVED AT BENSON FEED; we also carry wood stove pellets, cleanest burning, highest heat output, out performs all others, ½ cord almond firewood, bensonfeed.com, Carson City (775)882-3999 GREENWORKS ELECTRIC SNOWBLOWER 120V $75; CROSS Country Karhu skis with ski poles $40 (775)3152536 Having voices in your head is normal. Listening to them, common. Arguing, acceptable. However, when you lose the argument, you’re in trouble. March 2nd - Ash Wednesday
Disinfect / Re-luster/ Refurbish / Your Kitchen Cabinets
Don’t paint-out, Reface or Replace your Cabinetry until you evaluate our Services. The Great Basin has the Highest UV rays and Driest Climate in the USA, damaging your Cabinets finish from the Indirect light waves, containing UV! We have concepts, w/ years of experience developed for Nevada’s dry climate! Exclusive processes & products to Enhance, Renew and Refurbish over your Cabinets Original Finish! If you have original lacquered Cabinets that are 20 years or older, don’t wait or it may be too late! Less intrusive, less costly than Painting, Refacing or Replacing! You don’t have to empty-out your Cabinetry, and you don’t lose the function of your Kitchen! No dust & No chemical sprays and EPA Compliant! We work 9:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m., clean-up & Sanitize by 4:30 p.m., returning your kitchen to you until 9:00 a.m. the next morning! Yellowing? We have Options like Color Tinting and Color Glazing! Our Top-Coat is 100% UV Resistant, Chemical & Water Resistant! All products are Hand Rubbed, and completely Dustless! For Sampling, Client Testimonials, References & written Covid-19 Sanitizing Program or Questions; E-mail: danadesignnv@hotmail.com Or Text Dana, ‘CABINETS ETC.’ @ (775)781-7462 or Call Kathy @ (775)782-7821. NV. Lic. #18331, CA. Lic. #310071. I Dana, perform all work on site. TIRED OF BEING DULL? I SHARPEN CHEFS knives, scissors of all types, TJ’S Sharpening (775)841-1079
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REMNANT SALE! ODD BOXES OF TILE transition, strips for LVP, laminates and some LVP too! CJS Floors, 1420 Hwy. 395, Gardnerville (775)783-1561
Adam’s Rib
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said, ‘Johnny, what is the matter?’ Little Johnny responded, ‘I have pain in my side. I think I’m going to have a wife.’
TRUCKING, DUMP TRUCK, BOBCAT/LOADER, Excavation and Water Truck Services, call Wade Draper - EMS Transport at (775)690-1671 Last night I lay in my bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought; Where the heck is my ceiling?!
The Horseman
Son: “Gee pop, there’s a man at the circus who jumps on a horse’s back, slips underneath, catches hold of its tail and finishes up on the horse’s neck!” Dad: “That’s easy son... I did all that the first time I ever rode a horse.”
TAKE CARE OF YOUR LOVED ONES. WILLS and Trusts. Day R. Williams, Attorney at Law, 1601 Fairview Drive, Suite C, Carson City, NV. Call Day today! (775)8858398 HELP! I AM IN SEARCH OF SPECIALS FROM 1950-60’s American and/or European powered cars. Maybe steel, aluminum, fiberglass or combination. Cars created by enthusiast for pleasure or racing, contact (775)291-6827 HORSE DRAWN BUGGY, SEATS TWO PEOPLE, Timken bearing hubs $2,000 OBO (775)465-1812
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Men are misunderstood
Men are misunderstood alot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll never understand... Our consuming need to own the biggest and most expensive version of just about everything. Our compulsive desire to drive off-road vehicles in cities and use corkscrews that resemble offshore drilling equipment is well documented. As marketing targets, men are suckers for terms like “professional” or “industrial strength,” because inside every man is the germ of every profession he ever imagined himself one day excelling at. Most of these purchases are harmless, little more than childish wish fulfillment played out at a higher testosterone level. But occasionally we go too far. The guy upstairs from me once boasted that he had a filter which filled his flat with “operating theater quality air.” I kept him away from my surgical steel steak knives. Why we are so bad at shopping. We’ve never been trained to do it the right way. Supermarkets are like giant booby traps for males -- which is why if you send a man out to get eggs, sugar and bread, you should not be surprised if he returns home with a case of beer, a pair of jeans and a tree. The reason why we don’t like to discuss “The Relationship.” Most of us will find any excuse to dodge those conversations that
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start with questions like “Are you really happy?” and “Where do you see us going?” A relationship is a delicate thing, like an antique clock, and we know what will happen if we start picking it apart. Often our reticence will result in a lengthy conversation about why we have trouble talking about... “The Relationship.” Why we think we can fix things. Almost all men believe they can repair virtually anything with a little patience. In reality, we’re only half right. Men are extremely good at taking things apart: whether it’s a dishwasher or an antique clock, a man can break it down to its most basic components in no time. Unfortunately, this is where our expertise usually leaves off, and we’re mostly satisfied with leaving bits and pieces spread all over newspaper on the kitchen table. Men and video games. Women cannot understand how grown men can waste huge chunks of their lives zapping things off a screen. When a man repeatedly rings his girlfriend to say he has to work late and routinely comes home at two in the morning all glassy eyed, she will usually take this as evidence of an affair -- when it’s more likely that a pirated copy of Streetfighter V is making the rounds at the office. GREAT ITEMS! ROYAL SUPER MAGNUM 12 GAUGE, 3.5” two shot, 250 shells $100; truck guard, 29”Wx23”H, with france 8596.t. lights $35, and two circular saws $5 each, text or call (775)721-3346 SEMI RETIRED PAINTER, INTERIOR, EXTERIOR and cabinets, no two story houses, based in Minden area, call John (831)801-0003
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LAWN CARE SERVICE! AERATING, THATCHING, Mowing, Trimming, Pruning, Sprinklers/Repair, General Yard Clean Up, Free Estimates, 10+ Years Experience, Ruben (775)430-3585
There was a fly
There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when she happened upon a pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since she had had her last meal, she flew down and began to eat. She ate and ate. Finally, she decided she had eaten enough and tried to fly away. She had eaten too much though, and could not get off the ground. As she looked around wondering what to do, she spotted a pitchfork leaning up against the wall. She climbed to the top of the handle and jumped off, thinking that once she got airborne, she would be able to take flight. Unfortunately she was wrong and she dropped like a rock, and smashed when she hit the floor. Dead! ARE YOU READY FOR THE MORAL OF THE STORY? Never fly off the handle when you know you’re full of poop. FIVE TIE DOWN CHAINS AND BINDERS $350 OBO; 12’X24’ mesh tarp $70 OBO, large quantity of irrigation fittings $390 OBO (775)265-6798 MILLER TRAILBLAZER 325 ENGINE DRIVEN welder/ generator, 12000W, capable of running multiple tools & weld at the same time. Kohler gas motor with high altitude kit, only 170 low hours $6,500, $1,300 below new price! (775)790-6445
A little Super Bowl history
Though the NFL officially formed in 1920, the Super Bowl wasn’t played until more than 40 years later. In 1960, a group of businessmen who wanted to own football franchises—but were denied by the NFL—launched an alternative league, known as the American Football League (AFL). For several years, the NFL and AFL were rivals, competing for fans, players and support. Then, in 1966, owners negotiated an agreement to merge the leagues by 1970. After the leagues merged, the NFL split into two conferences: the American Football Conference (AFC) and the National Football Conference (NFC). The champions of each play in the Super Bowl The first Super Bowl, which featured the AFL (Kansas City Chiefs) and NFL champion (Green Bay Packers), was played January 15, 1967. The game was originally called the “AFLNFL World Championship Game.” Later, Chiefs owner Lamar Hunt proposed using the term “Super Bowl” to refer to the championship game. In Super Bowl I, the NFL champion Green Bay Packers defeated the AFL champion Kansas City Chiefs, 35-10, on January 15, 1967, at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum. Although ticket prices averaged $12, the game was not a sellout—the only non-sellout in the game’s history. The game drew 61,000 fans and was televised by CBS and NBC. The next year, the Packers decisively won Super Bowl II against the Oakland Raiders, 33-14. Many questioned whether the AFL champion could beat the NFL’s best. (history.com)
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Grand....Parent Estrangement, A ‘Silent Epidemic”
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There is an epidemic that is affecting the lives of both loving grandparents and also their precious little grandchildren. This epidemic goes by many names – grandparent alienation, grandparent abandonment, grandparent estrangement, severe child abuse, severe elder abuse, emotional domestic violence. Whatever you call it, it is rampant in our society and other countries of the developed world. It doesn’t just happen as a result of marriage breakdown, or because of teenage rebellion or because of childhood neglect or abuse. It happens in loving families. It has happened to us. It has happened to our kind loving daughter who never caused us a day’s trouble. She met a controlling man and he quite literally swept her off her feet with his charms and affections. Things moved very fast and within a very short time wedding bells were planned; it was all about him and she fell under his spell. One by one, when he no longer had any need for a member of her childhood family, he would find fault in them and eliminate them. This narcissist managed to convince her that her childhood was unhappy and created the most bizarre and contradictory stories to support the case. She slowly believed that she had always had these thoughts. She was brainwashed; she was unable to see through his very powerful and evil brainwashing skills. She was unable to see what was happening to her life and therefore did not talk to anyone about it. His own family were able to remain in contact but we believe under his strict conditions. He also found faults in her friends and they too were eliminated. He had succeeded – he had isolated her. Their relationship resembled a cult. It was and is a one-on-one cultic relationship. When children arrived on the scene, the isolation escalated. We, the grandparents, were never informed of an impending birth and have never ever set eyes on one of our grandchildren even though they live close by. And so our grandchildren will be growing up under the control of a narcissist. They will also be being brainwashed. They quite likely will be being taught to hate. Children who suffer such alienation will sadly grow up with no cohesiveness and in their family lives and will be unbalanced without the knowledge of their roots. They will only know the splintered and dysfunctional lives their parents have taught them. But alienation is generational. It will repeat in the lives of the children whose parents are perpetrating it upon them. This cycle will continue. It will come back to bite our daughter and her husband. When I look back over this horrible sequence of events I must find a weakness in my daughter in that she succumbed to her husband’s demands. That she could change from a kind compassionate girl to such a cruel person is so sad and so difficult to understand. This situation has been described as a living death. It is as though she is dead yet we know she is still alive. We cannot grieve properly – there is no body while she breathes in the same air just a short distance from us. We have many times suggested meeting up and talking through the issues but we get no response. We have told her that she is welcome back into our lives whenever she wishes. We will ask no questions. Meanwhile we, the grandparents, must get on with our lives. I have never held back on talking to family and friends about what has happened. I have never even once had anyone say to me that we must have been bad parents. People who have known our family since our daughter was little have all initially reacted
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with disbelief and shock. In fact several friends have become concerned that the same thing could happen to them when they became grandparents. I don’t expect any of them to truly understand as you have to live this horror to appreciate the enormity of the situation. It was when I first talked to family and friends that I heard of the words brainwashing and narcissism. To date we have also spoken to a total of six psychologists/counselors and in each meeting those same two words brainwashing and narcissism along with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) were mentioned. I guess I was very naïve. I also had never heard of the term family estrangement before. I had never ever heard of anyone distancing themselves from their family. Sure we didn’t always see eye to eye with our own parents but we would never have eliminated them from our lives. It makes no sense. Family is precious. Yes, I was very naïve. Now I find that there are so many support groups online. When I read of similar stories being told by people I realize that we are not alone and that this situation is an epidemic. I personally find that distraction is the only way I can cope. I plan to keep myself healthy so that I am still here when my grandchildren come looking for me one day – as they surely will. Thank you to our anonymous contributor for sharing this story. (startsat60.com) Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
March 13th - Daylight Savings
Fishing with Grandpa
A teenage boy and his grandfather go fishing one day. While fishing, the old man starts talking about how times have changed. The young man picks up on this and starts talking about the various problems and diseases going around. The teen says, “Grandpa, they didn’t have a whole lot of problems with all these diseases when you were young did they?” Grandpa replies, “Nope.” Teen says, “Well, what did you guys use for safe sex?” Grandpa replies, “A wedding ring.” PET CARE SERVICE! JODY WADDING, OWNER since 1991, references available, boarding offered or visit your home; horses, dogs, cats, reptiles, birds, fish… JWPetCare@ aol.com (775)782-1212 or (775)781-1065 PERFECTO GARDENING SERVICES, SERVING Carson Valley over 20 Years! Tree and Bush trimming, lawn care, competitive rates and all work guaranteed (775)265-7081
Fine Art Classes
East Fork Gallery, 1512 Hwy. 395, Suite 4, Gardnerville. For more details email eastforkartists@gmail.com or call (775)7827629 NDM-86 DRAGONOV COMPLETE, PLUS EXTRAS and a full case of 7N1 ammunition, Asking $11,000 or make offer, contact Pete at (775)315-4285
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Two-Minute Management Course
What’s for supper?
This guy was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass during the hot summer. He finally worked up the energy to go out and ask his wife what was for supper. Well, his missus was quite irritated about him sitting in the air conditioned house all day while she did all the work, so she scolded him. “I can’t believe you’re asking me about supper right now! Imagine I’m out of town, go inside and figure dinner out yourself.” So he went back in the house and fixed himself a big steak, with potatoes, garlic bread and tall glass of iced tea. The wife finally walked in about the time he was finishing up and asked him, “You fixed something to eat? So where is mine?” “Huh? I thought you were out of town.” PIONEER GLASS PLUS, RESIDENTIAL, COMMERCIAL, emergency services, fair prices, dependable quick service, quality work, 45 years experience, Frank Boudreau, owner NV#7876 (775)720-2373 AERATING & DETHATCHING $300 MOST Yards, Sprinkler Repair, Tree & Juniper Removal, Excavating, Earth, Turf & Timber Landscape Maintenance (775)450-1955 D R LANDSCAPING, DEFENSIBLE SPACE, TREE work and yard cleanups, sprinkler repairs and weed abatement, house and garage clean ups, Dave (775)671-0808
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Lesson One - An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?” The eagle answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit, and ate it. Management Lesson – To be sitting doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. Lesson Two - A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Management Lesson – Bullcrap might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there. Lesson Three - A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Management Lessons – (1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy. (2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend. (3) And when you’re in deep crap, it’s best to keep your mouth quiet! FOR SALE - 4 DINING ROOM CHAIRS, PATIO table and chairs, Barbecue and cover, Pictures, Chair with foot rest, Duncan Phyfe table, Candle wick pieces, Safe 24x17, make offer, Gardnerville (408)391-9252 34’ 5TH WHEEL RV COVER, USED ONCE $150; 212CC SNOW BLOWER, used once $150; 2000 Dodge Ram 5.9 diesel, 2 wheel drive, asking $3,500 (775)392-2392
Come join us at Johnson Lane Baptist Church
Bible Believing, Gospel Preaching, Christ Loving Church, Sunday, 9:45am Sunday School, 11am Sunday Service, 4pm Evening Service, 1581 Johnson Lane, Minden (775)267-9590 TOPAZ LAKE SHORT TERM RV SPACES AVAILABLE, dry camping - $50 per night - contact Pat at (775)781-2273 WE ARE CONSTRUCTION BOOKKEEPING SPECIALISTS – Serving both general and specialty contractors with 30+ years of bookkeeping, payroll and tax experience. If you can’t keep up with your workload give us a call ProBalanced Bookkeeping & Tax Service (775)246-3363
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Please signal your turns!
Submitted by Kevin Kiefer, Gardnerville, NV
One third of ALL auto accidents in this Country are a result of poor or no signals. NV drivers have the worst record by my observation, of anywhere I’ve lived, except California. I’ve lived in: ND, MN, Ohio, Oregon, Washington & California, finally retiring here in Northern NV. I believe that only about HALF of all NV drivers use their turn signals! Statistics tell us: there are 6 million auto accidents/year; 2 million are caused by improper or non-use of turn signals! Not only lane-changes are ignored, but turns, and especially turns from a “marked turn lane”. Reason often given: “I was in an obvious turn-lane, with an arrow painted under my car; it was obvious!” “USE of signals are required by both Federal & State laws. This applies to ALL turns including lane-changes, actual turns at corners, leaving a parallel-parking spot into traffic, NOT just turning-a-corner.” “Please Signal your turns! MAKE IT A HABIT!” $200 OFF ANY COMPLETE ROOFING JOB, NEW roof, re-roof, repairs, 10% off for repairs, $100 maximum, must present ad for discount, over 25 years experience, Licensed, Bonded and Insured, Tom Goldston Roofing, “Where Quality is Remembered Long After the Price is Forgotten” NV Lic#58203 (775)790-2461 The older you get, the more fragile you understand life to be. I think that’s good motivation for getting out of bed joyfully each day.
THOMAS J. BARTELS, HOROLOGIST, CLOCKS old and new repaired and restored. Authorized agent for Howard Miller, Ridgeway, and Sleigh, all work guaranteed! tomjbartels@gmail.com or (775)265-5541 or (775)901-1848 ACME BOAT & RV STORAGE – RESIDENT MANAGER, fenced, lighted, lowest rates around, Gardnerville (775)2654766
Happy March Birthdays!
May you have a special day, May your heart be full of cheer, May love and laughter find you, May your smiles be ear to ear. May your joy be everlasting, May only good things come your way, May all your prayers be answered, May you be blessed on your birthday. CASH PAID FOR OLD COSTUME JEWELRY: Rhinestones, Mexican and Indian Tourist Jewelry, Rings, Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins, Men’s Jewelry, Old Plastics, Silver, Copper, Glass Beads, Men’s and Women’s Old Wind Up Watches, Charm Bracelets, Lockets etc. Larger quantities preferred. I drive to you. Call or text Joanne at (775)4302352 CARSON VALLEY ATV - JOIN US FOR ADVENTURES of a lifetime! For more information visit www.facebook.com/ groups/carsonvalleyatv
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” FOR SALE - 2018 DODGE DURANGO CARGO COVER $100, leave message (775)392-1312 WEEKLY LAWN CARE AND AERATION, 16+ years experience, quality service, serving Carson Valley, Carson Valley Lawn Care, Insured (775)230-2546
Mommy test
I was out walking with my 6 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and, for some reason, started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. “Why?” my daughter asked. “Because it’s been laying on the ground, you don’t know where it’s been, it’s dirty and probably has germs” I replied. At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, “Wow! How do you know all this stuff?” “Uh,” I was thinking quickly, “All moms know this stuff. It’s on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don’t let you be a Mommy.” We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information. “OH...I get it!” she beamed, “So if you don’t pass the test you have to be the daddy.” “Exactly” I replied back with a big smile on my face and joy in my heart. PA SYSTEM, COMPLETE, 2 POWER SPEAKERS, 2 stands, mixer, microphone with stand, miscellaneous speaker cords, carry case on wheels for equipment $400, Bill (775)220-0492
Bus Drivers & Substitute Bus Drivers Wanted
Douglas County School District is currently accepting applications for: Contracted School Bus Drivers & Substitute School Bus Drivers, Starting Salary: $15.88/hour or based on up to 5 years of bus driving experience. Varied Hours up to 40 hours a week. Contracted positions for permanent routes include; Full benefits; medical, dental, vision & life insurance. Paid sick leave & holidays. NV PERS retirement. Apply online: dcsd.k12.nv.us/ employment to complete an application. March 15th - National Prayer Day
LARGE LOWRY ORGAN, PLAYS BEAUTIFULLY $300; Turkish wrought iron marble shelf $400, Horizontal Oak file cabinet $150 (775)350-9815 HYDRAULIC CYLINDER REPAIR AND REBUILD, All makes models and year, Commercial Equipment, Tractors, Fork Lifts, Log splitters, Farm equipment, Dump Trucks and Trailers, Boats and RVs, Welding and Machining, Ramco Fabrication, shawn@ramcofab.com or (775)267-7358
Physical exam
After the eighty-nine year old lady finished her annual physical examination, the doctor said, “You are in fine shape for your age, Mrs. Mallory, but tell me, do you still have intimacy?” “Just a minute, I’ll have to ask my husband,” she said. She stepped out into the crowded reception room and yelled out loud, “Bob, do we still have intimacy?” And there was a hush. You could hear a pin drop... Bob answered impatiently, “If I told you once, Irma, I told you a hundred times... What we have is... Blue Cross!” “ALWAYS ON DUTY” STURDY HANDRAILS, flat or stepped areas, all metal, free standing, custom built to fit your needs, installation available, maintain independence & a healthy well being! (775)790-6445 Happy people build their inner world. Unhappy people blame their outer world.
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com A Child’s View of Retirement
After the spring break, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent the holidays. One youngster offered the following: “We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live in a nice big brick house. But, grandpa got retarded and they moved to Floriduh. Now they live in a place with lots of other Grandmas and Grandpas. They live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around in huge tricycles and wear name tags because they don’t know who they are anymore. They go to a big building called the wrecked center. They must have fixed it because it looks pretty good now. They play games and do exercises there, but they don’t do them very well. There is a swimming pool, too, but they all jump up and down in it with their hats on. I guess they don’t know how to swim. At the gate, there is a dollhouse with a little old man who sits in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes though, they do manage to sneak out. Then they go cruising in their golf carts. Grandma used to bake cookies and other neat things, but I guess she forgot how. Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And they eat the same thing every night, “Early Bird,” whatever that is. Some of the people can’t get past the old man in the dollhouse. So the ones that escape bring food back to the wrecked center and call it a potluck. My Grandma says Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says that I should work hard so I can also be retarded someday too. When I earn my retardment, I want to be the old man in the dollhouse. Then I’ll let people out so they can visit their grandchildren.” 1971 BLUE AND WHITE VW SUPER BEETLE CONVERTIBLE, excellent condition in and out, second engine only 9,000 miles $15,000 OBO, located in Indian Hills (775)267-3888 YARD ENHANCEMENT SERVICES, handyman, fence repair/rebuild, tree and brush trim/removal, defensible space improvement, hauling, dump runs, Gardnerville area, Kelly (209)352-0084 SPECIALIZING IN GARAGES, ADDITIONS, REMODELS, decks, patio covers, free estimates, NV#0080432, Redline Construction Inc. (775)781-3955 380 AMMUNITION, 3 BOXES OF 50 ROUNDS, 95gr FMJ, 1 Winchester, 2 CCI Blazer $25/box or 3 boxes for $60, Cash, in person, Minden (775)781-0148 HANDYMAN SERVICES, WOOD DECK repair, replace, resurface and remove, trash removal, Honey-Do’s, etc. Serving Carson Valley (775)315-2235 WANTED: LICENSE PLATES, OLD MOTORCYCLE Helmets, Old Pre-1970’s Levi’s, Musical instruments, Old Watches and Old Lighters, John (775)315-4930
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Living life through the windshield and not the rear view mirror
We all had an image in our mind of how life was supposed to be. The road we were meant to take. As teenagers or young adults this road included a great marriage. A happy little (or large) family where everyone is healthy. A road marked with an exciting career or new business. A path filled with great friends, family and happiness. Maybe some are fortunate enough to have it turn out just like imagined, but for most the road gets bumpy along the way. Let’s face it – even those that appear most ‘successful’ experience a part of their journey to be a little messy. For many, major detours have led us down paths that look very little like we imagined when we started out. Some detours on life’s journey are a result of the wrong turns they have chosen to take. That road is dark and leads to a far away destination. The U-Turn, away from the wrong path, is made. But the damage is done. Consequences are real. And even though the road we are on now may be so much better, we still grieve over past wrong turns. Living life staring through the rear view mirror is a hard way to live. The road ‘that could have been’ is far gone. The road ahead of us is what cries out for our attention. Regardless of what lies behind us, the road directly in front of us is the one paved with hope and life. We have to live in the now. Quit staring in the rear view mirror because the view back there isn’t going to change any. Right in front of you is the life God has blessed you with. (K.Barlow)
Looking Fine
My face in the mirror isn’t wrinkled or drawn. My house isn’t dirty. The cobwebs are gone. My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn. I think I might never put my glasses back on. ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A GREAT ESCAPE close to home? Eagle Lake, Lassen County Vacation Rentals, Trophy Trout, all water sports, furnished cabins from $60 per night or $360 per week, visit eaglelakeheritage.com or (800)4595179
Douglas County Republican Women’s Luncheon
Dr. Frank Shallenberger will be the guest speaker at the March 2nd meeting of the Douglas County Republican Women. He will be addressing the issue of vaccines. So if you are interested in the information provided by Congressman Robert F. Kennedy Jr, Virologist Dr. Judy Mikovits, plus many other world renown doctors, come and listen to Dr. Shallenberger. Meeting takes place at Valley Christian Fellowship, 1681 Lucerne Dr, Minden, NV., at 11:45am. Doors open at 11:00am. For reservations please contact Linda, lrcal1@aol.com or 775782-5338. SEMI-RETIRED FINISH CARPENTER- DOOR install/ repairs, security screens, deadbolts, shelving, molding and general carpentry repairs. Call Mark (775) 782-6198 or (775)790-5927
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WANTED! THREE SQUARES ROOFING WOOD shakes; 6 sheets of 5/8” or 3/4” plywood; also wanted - Ithica shotgun, 12, 16 or 20 gauge; Remington Nylon 66, 22 caliber (775)842-1983 DO YOU NEED TO REPLACE YOUR WORN out concrete driveway, patio, or walkway? We also install new patios, driveways, monolithic garage slabs, retaining walls, footings, and stemwalls. K&C Construction, NV LIC # 79034, 79237, 81038, 86464. To get a free quote call at (775)691-6462 ALPINE TREE SERVICE - TRIMMING, REMOVAL, grinding and lot clearing, no job too small, Licensed, Insured and over 35 years experience (775)721-2880 MOBILE EQUIPMENT REPAIR, AUTOS and small to heavy equipment, 25+ years experience, Silva and Sons jeremysilva1975@gmail.com or (707)761-0928 INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR PAINTING, COMMERCIAL/Residential, decking and railing maintenance, pressure washing, Free Estimates. JR’S Painting, NV Lic.#20181749300, call or text (775)291-1319 or call (775)2912453 HOME REPAIR PRO, MR. FIX IT, ANY OUTSIDE/INSIDE repairs, big or small, flat rate $40 per hour (775)6915119 “A MOVING EXPERIENCE” - MOVE ASSISTANCE, 25 years experience, Senior Discounts! Ken Jeter, kenjeter65@ gmail.com or (775)530-8932
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Where are you from?
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. “Why of course,” comes the reply. The first man then asks: “Where are you from?” “I’m from Ireland,” replies the second man. The first man responds: “You don’t say, I’m from Ireland too! Let’s have another round to Ireland.” “Of course,” replies the second man. I’m curious, the first man then asks: “Where in Ireland are you from?” “Dublin,” comes the reply. “I can’t believe it,” says the first man. “I’m from Dublin too! Let’s have another drink to Dublin.” “Of course,” replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: “What school did you go to?” “Saint Vincent’s,” replies the second man, “I graduated in ’62.” “This is unbelievable!”, the first man says. “I went to Saint Vincent’s and I graduated in ’62, too!” About that time, in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. “What’s been going on?” he asks the bartender. “Nothing much,” replies the bartender. “The O’Malley twins are drunk again.” MINOR TO MAJOR AUTOMOTIVE REPAIRS, Tires and More! ASE Certified Master Mechanic, 40+ years same location! Senior Discounts, Bobs Shell Service, Carson City (775)883-7919 Some people think I’m unhappy, but I’m not. I just need silence in a world that never stops talking.
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G & J LANDSCAPING MAINTENANCE, TRIM, prune, fertilize, aerate, sprinklers, General clean-up, Free Estimates, Victor (775)291-1672
Inner Peace
If you can start the day without caffeine, If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains, If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles, If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it, If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time, If you can take criticism and blame without resentment, If you can conquer tension without medical help, If you can relax without alcohol, If you can sleep without the aid of drugs, Then you are probably… the family dog! WINE MAKING EQUIPMENT, USED – VERY GOOD, Crusher-destemmer, #45 grape press, Teel pump, floor corker, bottle spritzer and drying tree, 5 gallon carboys (10), 6 gallon carboys (1), 20 gallon SS pressure tank, 30 gallon SS pressure tank, CO2 tank and regulator, several 50 gallon fermentation drums, fermentation blankets, 5 gallon soda pressure tanks (5), barrel stands (2), miscellaneous tubing, miscellaneous SS tri-clover and plastic fittings, burette, all for $1,900 (775)265-9159 SWIMMING POOL SERVICE, WEEKLY or Bi-Monthly, Mountain Pool & Spa Licensed and Insured Tahoepoolboy@gmail.com or (530)318-1698
Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
Once upon a time
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated. The perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident. Question: Who was the survivor? Answer: The perfect woman survived. She’s the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man. Women stop reading here… that is the end of the joke. Men keep reading. So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident. Men Only… Keep reading. By the way, if you’re a woman and you’re still reading… this illustrates another point: “Women never listen.” March 17th - St. Patrick’s Day
MIGUEL’S GARDEN SERVICE, FULL LAWN MAINTENANCE, clean up, fertilizing, dead shrubs and trees pulled out, excellent references, great rates, serving Carson Valley 27+ years! 775)265-0501 THELAN PELLET STOVE; 10” RADIAL Arm Saw; truck tool box 2000 Suzuki Intruder 1400cc, Call for pricing (775)230-3221 FOR A NEW AND INNOVATIVE HAIR STYLE call Cathy Hallifax at Déjà vu Salon in Minden, mention this ad for $5 off any hair service (530)518-1166 or (775)782-8776
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Millennial Slang Words
SUTRO LANDSCAPING, ONE CALL DOES IT all; lawn care, aerating and thatching, sprinkler systems, sod installation and planting, clean-ups and much more, Free Estimates, Operated by owner, NV#50048 (775)246-4871 or (775)2913095 Your ex asking if you can still be friends after a break- up is like a kidnapper telling you to keep in touch. The publisher does not assume any responsibility for the contents of any advertising herein, and all representation or warranties made in such advertising are those of the advertisers and not the publishers.
Douglas County Democrats
Even when you’re young, it’s hard to keep up with all of the new millennial slang, but this list may help. Receipts – Evidence of a person’s hypocrisy, often pulled from past social media or text conversations Extra – Over the top, dramatic behavior Bae – A pet name that stands for Before Anyone Else Yaas – An enthusiastic way of saying yes Low key – Low intensity / slight / kind of AF – An acronym for “as fu#$k” Turnt – Hype for a party Mood – Used to express something that is relatable Lit – When something is turned up or popping Sus – When someone is acting suspicious or shady Salty – Acting upset or bitter Bruh – Another way of saying “seriously?” Woke – Being aware of current affairs Thirsty – Horny Basic – Only interested in mainstream, popular things On fleek – Fashionable Clap back – A comeback filled with attitude Hunty – Equivalent of friend but said with attitude Humble brag – When someone complains about their life while sneaking in a brag Bye Felicia – An expression used to dismiss someone Slay – Killing it / Succeeding Adulting – To grow up and act responsible Throwing shade – Making a subtly mean comment about someone Dead – When someone is euphorically happy Swerve – Get out of the way Trolls – Someone who purposely tries to provoke others Ratchet – Trashy Stan – A combination of stalker and fan V – A shortened form of very Gassed – When someone has had one too many compliments and is full of themselves Beat – To have a full face of makeup Dank – Really cool Ghost – When you completely disappear after hanging out and showing interest Shook – Confused or in utter disbelief High-key – Straight up truth Fam – A group of friends who feels more like family Mom – The most responsible friend in the group Savage – Petty Shipping – Wanting two people to date JOMO – Joy of missing out OTP – One true pairing Trill – True and real Hundo P – A shortened form of 100% Snatched – Attractive Dad – A role model Finesse – To smooth things out Goals – A way of subtly expressing that you’re jealousTBH – To be honest Squad – A group of friends GOAT – Greatest of all time Yeet – A way to show excitement or agree Thirst trap – A sexy photograph or flirtatious message posted on social media Wig snatched – Exposing someone to reveal the truth FOMO – Fear of missing out Thicc – Someone with curves Phubbing – Snubbing someone to pay attention to your phone instead Suh – A shortened version of what’s up Blessed – Feeling fortunate Bounce – Leaving suddenly. FOR SALE - FIRST STREET BROWN ELECTRIC recliner lift chair with heat and massage, used 7 months $700, leave message (775)392-1312
The Douglas County Democrats Central Committee is happy to return to its regular meeting schedule. Our next meeting will be held on Thursday, March 24 at 6:30 PM. Join us to hear about our exciting schedule of activities for 2022. Note, proof of vaccination will be required to attend in person. Please check our website at www.douglasdems.org for further information.
CASH PAID FOR OLD COSTUME JEWELRY: All types including Silver, Copper, Rhinestones, Old Plastics, Glass, Pot Metal, Pins, Bracelets, Rings, Necklaces, Old Watches, Lockets, larger quantities preferred, please leave phone number and clear message on my NEW phone number, I call everyone back, Call or text Joanne at (775)430-2352
PALMETTO AR10, 308/762, 16” BBL, RED Dot - $1,250; Palmetto AR15 pistol, 556/223, 7.5” BBL, $675; Palmetto AR15 pistol, 556/223, 10.5” BBL, $675; Kimber 1911 Micro 9mm, $640; Sig Sauer P365; 9mm $710; Walther, P22, 22LR, $430; all new, AFR (775)720-6076
HANDYMAN PROS - RAPID RESPONSE, ALL Phases of Construction, New, Repair, Roofs, Bath, Kitchen, Painting, Custom, Carpentry, Landscaping, Electrical, Concrete, Plumbing, Tile, Granite & more, Professionally Designed Blue Prints (775)400-6822
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
The old lawyer
An old, stingy lawyer had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and was determined to prove wrong the old saying, “You can’t take it with you.” After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillowcases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven. Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer’s wife, up in the attic cleaning came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash. “Oh, that old fool,” she exclaimed. “I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement.” PLUMBING, LEAKY PIPES, SERVICE AND REPAIR, remodels, new construction, residential and commercial, since 1997, bonded and insured, guaranteed, NV#47214, CA#513872, Call Robert (775)690-1441 Man is the only living being who cuts trees, makes paper, and writes “SAVE THE TREES” on it. TROY BILT PTO 7HP ROTOTILLER, ELECTRIC or pull start, 2 forward speeds, includes owner’s manual, aerator and edger accessories $800 cash (77)465-1077
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2011 JEEP WRANGLER SOFT TOP, ONE SMALL patched hole $200; Antique double brass bed headboard and footboard with bed-frame $250 (775)450-6939 OLDER DEVILBISS HORIZONTAL AIR COMPRESSOR. 3 phase, 5hp electric motor and approximately 20 gallon tank $500 (775)463-3595 STANDARD FLAG GRAVEL, R&J TRUCKING delivers, 25 years experience, call Roger (775)233-7337
VFW Breakfast
Topaz VFW Post 3630 is again hosting a monthly breakfast 8:00am-9:30am at the TRE Community Center, 3939 Carter Way on the 4th Saturday of each month. The breakfast is to rally support for the TRE Veterans by bringing together families and friends for a fun event. $5 Adults, $3 Children under 10. The VFW Post 3630 has a regular meeting at 4:00pm on the 3rd Wednesday of each month. New members are always welcome! CASH PAID FOR VINTAGE COSTUME JEWELRY. All Types Including: Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins, Rings, Silver, Copper, Pot Metal, Rhinestones, Lockets, Charm Bracelets, Men’s Jewelry, Old Watches, Military Jewelry, Old Mexican and Indian Tourist Jewelry. Larger Quantities Preferred. Please leave phone number and clear message on my phone. I return all calls. Call or text Joanne at (775)430-2352
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Benefits of the Family Table
CHÉ WHITE BOOKKEEPING & PAYROLL Services, Specializing in Small Business, Corporation, Not-for-Profit, and Personal Finance. Located in Carson Valley, 25+ years experience. CheWhiteBooks@gmail.com or (844)343-0343 The difference between happy people and unhappy people is their level of gratitude. KENNY AND COLLEEN’S STUMP GRINDING services, K&C stump grinding services, Call (917)362-3181 or (410)739-4052
First Wedding
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?” “Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. “How do you know that?” “Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up,” like the Bishop said: “4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.” Writing the Editor - We welcome all articles, letters, jokes and comments on Sierra Scoop, local issues, community news and free private party ads, published as space provides. These articles, letters, comments do not necessarily reflect our opinion. All public input is welcome. sierrascoop@charter.net, (775)782-4520
March 20th - First Day of Spring - Yippee! 26
According to the Food Marketing Institute, just 40 percent of American families eat dinner together, and then, no more than two or three times a week. That’s in stark contrast to just a generation ago when close to 80 percent of families regularly ate evening meals together. The term “Family Table” obviously describes the situation in which the family shares time together while eating a meal, but it is much more than that. It is a time of open communication in a relaxed setting, allowing all family members to share ideas and experiences. As early as 1943, researchers were discussing the benefits of the Family Table from a sociological and cultural viewpoint. “Family table talk is an essential part of the process whereby the family inducts the child into the life of society.” Family meals allow the parents to impart values and traditions, as well as demonstrate appropriate relationships, communication techniques, and problem solving skills. Family meals are powerful for many reasons. First, meal times impact all of our senses – the sight, touch, taste, and smell of food, as well as listening to family conversation. Family meals offer the opportunity to spend time together, reconnect after a busy day, communicate with and listen to each other, share values and ideas, and problem solve. Family meals also contribute to traditions that tie families together. A special food for a birthday celebration, a favorite place to eat for special occasions, a cultural or ethnic food unique to the family’s heritage – these become traditions that provide meaning and context for children as they grow. Family meals provide structure for the day, allowing children to feel more secure and safe, knowing what to expect. They also permit parental monitoring of children’s moods, behavior, and activities, providing parents with insight into the emotional wellbeing of their children. When extended to neighbors and friends, family meals allow children to learn and appreciate social interactions, understand the importance of community, and experience different ideas while under the guidance of their parents. The family table is one of the very few places that children can observe their parents interact, negotiate, solve problems, express emotions and treat one another with respect. A child’s world is mostly spent with peers and teachers; the family table gives them a chance to see how adults interact and cooperate. With hectic family schedules and busy lives these days, you may never “find time” for this family tradition, however, you need to make time. Look at your calendar and book a date with your family for dinner. You won’t regret it. (American College of Pediatricians) FORD 4 WHEEL DRIVE 11 PASSENGER VAN, ORIGINAL OWNER; 1 vintage Steinway piano; washer/dryer; upright refrigerator/freezer; mining ore car on narrow gauge track; two man logging saw; wood and glass display counters; floral items, Call for details (775)265-1480 A person with a sharp tongue will eventually cut themselves. TWO BAR STOOLS, KITCHEN COUNTER high, black metal, red leatherette seats $20 each; 3’ square Cherry wood coffee table with shadow box display area on top $45, Carson City (775)762-2210
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” RUSSELL’S TREE SERVICE, #1 ARTISTRY IN TREE Care; Shaping, Balancing, Removals, Stump Grinding, Fruit Trees, Hedges, Ornamental Pruning, Serving your area, Licensed/Insured (775)685-0528 CUJO’S HOG HOUSE! V-TWIN Motorcycle repair, Maintenance and accessories, also sales and service of Frankenstein Trike conversions, Factory Trained PHD and ASE Certified, 1430 Industrial Way, Unit C (in the back) (775)782-6051
What is the meaning of Ash Wednesday?
Roman Catholic churches of the Latin Rite use this service to prepare church members to better appreciate the death and resurrection of Christ through self-examination, repentance, prayer, fasting, and self-denial. Ashes from the burned palms of the preceding year’s Palm Sunday are blessed. With these ashes, the priest marks a cross on the foreheads of worshipers, saying, “Remember, man, that dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return” (Genesis 3:19 KJV). Besides showing sorrow for their sins, those who honor Ash Wednesday add an additional meaning; the need to prepare for a holy death. Ash Wednesday is not specifically mentioned in the Bible, however, from Biblical times, sprinkling oneself with ashes has been a mark of sorrow for sin. Several times the Bible mentions people repenting in dust and ashes; for example: Mordecai (Esther 4:1), Job (Job 42:6), the inhabitants of Nineveh (Jonah 3:5-6), and Daniel (Daniel 9:3-4). Repentance in dust and ashes often was accompanied with fasting during Bible times. (bibleinfo.com)
Losing Weight
Mr. Johnson was overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. He said, I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least five pounds. When Mr. Johnson returned, he shocked the doctor by having dropped almost twenty pounds. ”Why, that’s amazing” the doctor told him. You did this just by following my instructions? The slimmed down Mr. Johnson nodded. I’ll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day. From hunger, you mean. No, replied Mr. Johnson, from skipping.
Silence and a smile are two powerful tools. A smile is a way to solve many problems and silence is a way to avoid many problems. COMPLETE LANDSCAPING, RESIDENTIAL and commercial, weekly maintenance, tree trimming, emergency repairs, sprinklers/drip, pavers, patios, retaining walls, Davenport Landscape and Design, NV Lic.#0074827, davenportlandscape.com or (775)265-1491 or (775)721-8439
Married Couple
An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, “When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!” Neighbors feared him. They believed he practiced magic because of the many strange occurrences that took place in their neighborhood. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. To everyone’s relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 98. His wife had a closed casket at the funeral. After the burial, she went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow. Her neighbors, concerned for her safety, asked “Aren’t you afraid that he may indeed dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?” The wife put down her drink and said, “Let him dig. I had him buried face down. And I know he won’t ask for directions!” March 31st - Cesar Chavez Day
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BATH TUBS REPAIRED, RESURFACED, AND re-colored, Acrylic, Fiberglass and Porcelain, Call The Tub Doctor (775)233- 5297
ALLERGIES AND DUST A PROBLEM? WHOLE house air duct cleaning special $499, all vents, returns, heater and ac cleaned and sanitized, dryer vent cleaning $99, call Peake Air, NV#260831 (775)392-0994
There are three kinds of people in the world. People who make things happen. People who watch things happen and people who say “What happened?”
HARLEY DAVIDSON ENGINE REBUILDING, 30+ years experience, quick turn-around! Free pick–up and delivery, parts in one day! californiafritz.com or (530)694-2521
GET FAST INTERNET! UP TO 40 MBPS, WIRELESS! (not satellite, not DSL). Great in rural areas, www.ruralinternet.us or call Patrick (775)297-4777
CASH PAID FOR – KNIVES; LANTERNS; Camp Stoves; Hunting; Shooting; Decoys; Fishing; Tobacco Pipes; Lighters, Jeff (775)720-2577
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” An Irish Wish for St. Patricks Day
May you always have a sunbeam to warm you, Good luck to charm you, And a sheltering angel so nothing can harm you, Laughter to cheer you, Faithful friends near you, And whenever you pray, Heaven to hear you. May your joys be deep and many, May your heart be light and glad, May you have the best St. Patrick’s Day that you have ever had. (Author unknown) PLASTIC STORAGE BOXES WITH LIDS $8 EACH; 5 drawer file cabinet $25 OBO; Budweiser ‘After The Hunt’ bar light $50 OBO; ACE Hardware Style Popcorn Machine with popcorn $600 0B0; Carson City (408)270-4028 BOAT STORAGE ON TOPAZ LAKE - $75 A MONTH LAKE access available - contact Pat at (775)781-2273 WELDING SET, GAS, OLD VICTOR DUAL GAUGE, big cylinders, 32” and 48”, cart and torches $150; cabinet, outside steel, lockable 68”hX31”wX16.5”d $75; Enclosed trailer, steel, 4 doors 77”wX105”dX50”h $300; Jack transmission floor, Wadal $75, Chuck (775)265-0548 PORSCHES WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE! OLD Porsches 1950 to 1973, looking for a Porsche 356, 911 or 912, running or not, with or without engine or transmission, also interested in parts. Will pay cash! Have trailer will travel (775)2916827
Plane Conversation
An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an airplane, and he turned to her and asked, “Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with a fellow passenger.” The little girl, who was drawing some pictures, replied to the total stranger, “What would you like to talk about?” “Oh, I don’t know,” said the atheist… “how about why there is no God, or no heaven or hell, or no life after death?” as he smiled smugly. “Okay… those could be interesting topics. But, first, let me ask you a question. A horse, a cow, and a deer, all eat the same stuff… grass. But, a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?” The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl’s intelligence, thinks about it a moment and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.” To which the little girl replied, “Do you really feel qualified to talk about God, Heaven or Hell, or life after death, when you obviously don’t know poop?” Never sing in the shower! Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So remember...Don’t sing! MICHELINS DEFENDER TIRES, 5 LUG 215/60R16/95H $300 OBO (775)350-5697 AFFORDABLE NEVADA CCW CLASSES $50, tac-aimfirearmsinstruction.com or (775)360-5214
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Visit us at www.SierraScoop.com
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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