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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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MOBILE COMPUTER REPAIR AND SERVICE Quality work performed in-shop, in office or in-home. Dependable, affordable! Over 14+ Years Experience. Proudly serving Carson Valley and Surrounding Communities. Call Nick at Technologic Computer Repair (775)450-7570 TSURUMI SUBMERSIBLE PUMPS LB-800.62 2”, $500 each or $850 for both (775)720-7762 WINCHESTER 94 SADDLE RING CARBINE, 32 WS, made in 1925 $850 (775)842-4065 WE’LL KEEP YOU IN STITCHES, WE COVER autos, furniture and ATV’s, 47 years experience, Tweeds Upholstery, Gardnerville, tweedsupholstery@yahoo.com or (775)782-5812 1983 HONDA XL600 DUAL SPORT, GREAT SHAPE, 7,475 original miles $1,000 OBO (775)781-0841 NEVADA CCW CLASSES $50, EMAIL tacaimnv@ gmail or call (775)360-5214 BATH TUBS REPAIRED, RESURFACED, AND recolored, Acrylic, Fiberglass and Porcelain, Call The Tub Doctor (775)233- 5297
QUALITY HOME MAINTENANCE AND IMPROVEMENTS, prompt, honest and reliable, fair pricing, all work guaranteed, call for free estimate and visit! Frank (775)309-7299 WINCHESTER MODEL 1892 RIFLE, 38/40 CALIBER, 24” Octagon Barrel, rifle comes apart into two pieces, NV resident and by appointment only (775)2655961 INCOME TAX, GEORGE HALLIFAX, CPA, EA, TAX preparation, Federal and all States, prior years, audit representation, 30 years experience, reasonable rates (775)392-0418 AIR COMPRESSOR 5HP 1750RPM, 230 VOLTS tank, model 3020, maximum P.S.I. 200 $800 (775)781-5354 WE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOUR PETS IN YOUR home, all sizes, we can spoil them as you do, call for meet and greet, 10 years experience, Serving Dayton, Carson City, Douglas County, Johnnell and Al (209)986-6381 ARIENS ZOOM 1640 ZERO TURN LAWNMOWER, 15HP (Kohler), 42” deck, triple bucket system, new blade, one-year old battery, serviced annually $1,700 OBO, Minden (626)372-0068
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Best of Reno Presented by:
reno gazette journal
The Black Dot
One day, a professor entered his classroom and asked his students to prepare for a surprise test. They all waited anxiously at their desks for the exam to begin. The professor handed out the exams with the text facing down, as usual. Once he handed them all out, he asked the students to turn over the papers. To everyone’s surprise, there were no questions–just a black dot in the center of the paper. The professor, seeing the expression on everyone’s faces, told them the following: “I want you to write about what you see there.” The students, confused, got started on the inexplicable task. At the end of the class, the professor took all the exams, and started reading each one of them out loud in front of all the students. All of them, with no exception, defined the black dot, trying to explain its position in the center of the sheet. After all had been read, the classroom silent, the professor started to explain: “I’m not going to grade you on this, I just wanted to give you something to think about. No one wrote about the white part of the paper. Everyone focused on the black dot – and the same thing happens in our lives. However, we insist on focusing only on the black dot – the health issues that bother us, the lack of money, the complicated relationship with a family member, the disappointment with
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a friend. The dark spots are very small when compared to everything we have in our lives, but they are the ones that pollute our minds. Take your eyes away from the black dots in your lives. Enjoy each one of your blessings, each moment that life gives you. Be happy and live a life filled with love!” GV CBD FULL SPECTRUM LOCALLY ORGANIC grown products. Pain inflammation, Anxiety, Neuropathy, Studies show relief, NDOA licensed-tested, www. gvorganiccbd.com (775)790-0889 CASH PAID FOR VINTAGE COSTUME JEWERLY. All Types Including: Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins, Rings, Silver, Copper, Pot Metal, Rhinestones, Lockets, Charm Bracelets, Men’s Jewelry, Old Watches, Military Jewelry, Old Mexican and Indian Tourist Jewelry. Larger Quantities Preferred. Please leave clear message on this home phone. I return all calls. Call Joanne at (775)4659422 GOT WOOD? SAMMY’S FIREWOOD, HONEST Quality Service, soft and hard wood, delivery available, located in Carson City (775)315-0834
April 1st- April Fool’s Day
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®
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” The Adventuresome Samuel Chapin - Part 1
Free Antique and Collectable Appraisal Clinic
The Red Rooster Emporium’s friendly staff with combined decades of experience, are offering a FREE, walk-in (opinion of value) Appraisal Clinic on Saturday, April 13th, 11am – 3pm. As a courtesy to other guests, appraisals are limited to one per person. Appraisal exclusions are: precious gems, coins, stamps, fire arms, Oriental and Fine Art that would require a more comprehensive research. For further information call the Red Rooster, 10am3pm, Tuesday – Saturday, 37 N. Main Street, Yerington, NV (916)203-8100 PLUMBING, LEAKY PIPES, SERVICE AND REPAIR, remodels, new construction, residential and commercial, since 1997, bonded and insured, guaranteed, NV#47214, CA#513872, Call Robert (775)690-1441 THE CHICKS HAVE ARRIVED AT BENSON FEED; we also carry wood stove pellets, cleanest burning, highest heat output, out performs all others, ½ cord almond firewood, Carson City (775)882-3999 USA DRYWALL, REMODELS AND REPAIRS, Hanging, Taping, any texture, Additions, No Job too small, Insured and Bonded, NV#59981 (775)247-2539
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By Karen Dustman The sign on the tall, blue house in Virginia City caught our eye as we whizzed past: “The Chapin House.” It’s an unusual last name — and one we recognized from old letters in Alpine County. So, just who was Samuel A. Chapin? We tracked down a few pieces of his life story puzzle — and what a life he had! Born in Northbridge, Massachusetts on September 2, 1811, Samuel Austin Chapin was the fifth (out of eight) children of Henry and Abigail Chapin. His family moved to Michigan Territory in the spring of 1830, and Samuel’s early adulthood was spent in White Pidgeon. He would later recount “startling and amusing” tales of “roughing it” there, and serving as sheriff of St. Joseph County, Michigan. Samuel joined other Michigan volunteers during the Black Hawk War of 1832, quickly rising to the rank of Brigadier General with the Michigan State Militia. In 1840, he went on to serve as a member of the Michigan House of Representatives for one session. Exciting as all that must have been, nothing could quite rival the excitement of finding gold! Chapin eagerly joined some of the earliest Gold Rush crowds to California, though exactly when he arrived there is unclear. He once claimed to plainly remember the day that “we of ’49” arrived at San Francisco Bay. Other accounts, however, peg the actual date of his arrival as May 20, 1850. Even so, that date still puts him among the earliest eager Argonauts. Chapin’s adventurous journey included a “rough passage” aboard the vessel Empire City; a “raging fever” on the Chagres River; and an unexpected hiccup in Panama when the expected continuation vessel, Sarah Sereds, failed to arrive. Chapin and his companions managed to book substitute passage aboard the steamship Oregon for $500 a head — procuring a welcome but crowded spot in steerage along with a thousand other eager gold-seekers. Once aboard ship, Chapin was said to have “organized a mess” with fellow passengers William Smith, a former governor of Virginia, and L.B. Benchley, of San Francisco — political connections that helped render the rest of the passage “comparatively comfortable.” During his earliest days in California, Chapin operated a hardware business. He also managed to become a member of the San Francisco Board of Education, helping select property upon which to build future schools, and made friends with the influential editor of the Evening Bulletin. By 1860 the Gold Rush had largely petered out — but the Silver Rush now was on! And once again, Chapin was in the forefront of adventurous pioneers. Chapin acquired a mill site on the Carson River, four miles from Silver City, in July of 1860. That same month he hired a survey on land in Steamboat Valley — property that included not only a mill site but also valuable timber and water rights. And his political instincts evidently re-
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mained as sharp as ever; Chapin soon was tapped to serve as a member of the two Constitutional Conventions working to frame Nevada’s state constitution. Naturally, Chapin had his finger in several early mining pies. He acquired an interest in the quartz mines of Mariposa County. His name appears in May, 1863 among the list of incorporators of the Buckeye No. 2 Gold & Silver Mine in Scandinavian Canyon (soon to become Alpine County). And he also purchased an interest in mines on the Comstock. In 1865, Chapin issued a “report” extolling the merits of his “Gold Hill Front Lodes” at Gold Hill, Nevada — two parallel claims happily situated between the Yellow Jacket and the Justice Mines. This “report” (actually a sales brochure) was, of course, heavily leavened with “affirmations and statements from various persons” about the value of these two mines. Our story will continue in Part 2 next month! Karen Dustman writes frequently about Sierra history. Visit www.Clairitage.com to check out her blog and books. 100+ STUFFED MINIATURE TO SMALL BEARS collection; Paperbacks, like new, complete Stuart Woods, John Sandford, Robert B. Parker, Michael Connelly, Sue Grafton, Murder She Wrote and Monk (775)2675141
BLIND AND WINDOW CLEANING SERVICES, residential and commercial, multi story specialist, mobile blind cleaning, pressure washing, awning cleaning, snow removal, Call Unlimited for a clear view! (775)883-6629
With Some Wit on the Side
Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn’t dare discuss in front of him - his height. Or, should I say, his lack of it. One day, he stormed through the door and announced angrily, “Someone just picked my pocket!” Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except for the one who blurted out, “How could anyone stoop so low?” FOR SALE BY OWNER! ONE OF A KIND BEAUTIFUL East Valley property, Minden, elevated 5 acres, 3 bedroom, 2 bath remodeled home, backs up to BLM land, Panoramic Mountain and Valley Views, 2,800 sq. ft. finished heated shop, designed with reclaimed timbers, 146 mature Evergreen trees, Orchard, Aspen Grove, garden area and much more, Asking $949,000, For more information and photos email finesignsnv@ gmail.com or (775)781-0841
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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2 FAMILY GARAGE AND PRINTING BUSINESS Sale, April 18, 19, 20, 21 - Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (Easter Weekend) 8am to 3pm; Furniture, lighting, sports, tennis, climbing, camp chairs, sleeping bags, tripod, coats, gun collection. Newer and old double barrel shotguns. Bed, sheets, comforters, bathroom sink, kitchen items, crystal bowls and jewelry. Counter ovens, display cases, old chairs and school, desk lights, filing cabinets, baskets, books- popular and tech. Playboy and old west magazines, western guns and modern antiques. Civil war letters. CD’s and DVD’s. Gift items, printer, copy, ladders, electrical cords, wheel barrows, air purifiers, 2 saddles, gun racks. Harley Davidson leather, coat, vest, Printing business items, miscellaneous boxes, cigar, dynamite, ammo, collectible. Tripod. Beautiful frames and art. Hats, shirts, radios, phonograph, tractor “harrows”, and 2007 Harley FLHX, 3 Farrell Lane Yerington, NV
My Super Ex-Wife
My ex-wife and I could not reconcile our marriage because of religious differences. She thought she was God. I disagreed. HANDCRAFTED MARKERS AND MONUMENTS, Granite and Bronze. Large Selection of colors and designs, special orders welcome! 15 years experience, call Cornerstone Monument for appointment (775)267-1958 ASPEN ROOFING INC. FREE ESTIMATES, ALL types, Re-roofs, New and Repairs, NV#0069418, Insured and Bonded, Chris (775)230-8174 BURNING MAN, OFF THE GRID WATER HEATERS, rare Army issue M67 Immersion $150 each (775)720-7762
Douglas County Republican Women’s...
April meeting will be held on Wednesday, April 3rd at Carson Valley Inn. Our guest speaker will be Greg Smith who served 29 years with the Corrections Department prior to his retirement as the last warden at NV State Prison. Doors open at 11:00am. Buffet lunch begins at 11:45am. Gift items available from our boutique. Raffle tickets are available for purchase as well as the 50/50 drawing. Reservations are required ! Cost: $25 (with reservation) and $30 (without reservation). To make a reservation please notify Linda by March 28th at LRCAL1@aol.com or call 775-782-5338 HANDYMAN SERVICE – HOME REPAIRS, FENCING Repair/Replacement, Hauling, Trash Removal, Shrub and Tree Trimming and Removal, and Weed Removal, Free Estimates (775)781-1747
April 20th- Passover
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Toy Trivia Quiz
1. What popular kids’ action figure came with its body parts but nobody until 1964? a) Kermit the Frog b) Mr. Potato Head c) G.I. Joe d) Barbie 2. In 1966, little confectioners could make bubble gum in what machine? a) Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine b) Cotton Candy Machine c) Barbie Ice Cream Shoppe d) Easy-Bake Oven 3. The ingredients for the original version of this kidfriendly gooey stuff are still a secret after 46 years. a) Silly Putty b) Elmer’s Glue c) Slime d) Play-Doh 4. CBS television used these dolls to commemorate the coronation of Queen Elizabeth II because of their historical accuracy. a) Power Rangers b) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles c) Madame Alexander dolls d) Mickey and Minnie Mouse dolls 5. Which of these was the first movie based on a board game? a) Candy Land b) Toy Story c) Clue: The Movie d) Pee Wee’s Big Adventure 6. More than five billion of these pieces of real estate have been built since 1935. a) Barbie Dream Houses b) Trump Towers c) Lego bricks d) Monopoly houses 7. How many pounds of Silly Putty are produced each day? a) 1,500 b) 50 c) 2,000,000 d) 500 8. The smell of which old-time favorite is among the 20 most recognizable scents to adults? a) Mr. Sketch scented
Barking Lot Sale!
Saturday, May 18th, 2019, 8am-3pm. Sell your “stuff” and help maintain your local dog park: 12’x12’ sales spaces available, $25 a space in advance, $30 after May 1st. Mail checks to DVDP PO Box 995, Dayton, NV 89403. Want to donate your stuff? Drop off items Friday, May 17th, 4pm-6pm at Dayton Valley Dog Park, Dayton Valley Road and Como Road in Dayton. Need an application or have questions? Call us at (775)297-1359 or email daytonvalleydogpark@gmail. com. Thank you for your support! MAINTENANCE FREE DECKS AND PATIO COVERS, knowledgeable, honest, professional service! Serving Northern Nevada for 18+ years! Free Quotes! K & C Construction, NV#0079034 (775)691-6462 COLT 1877 MODEL “THUNDER” - SHERIFFS model, made in 1879/early model, 41 caliber $1,500 (775)842-4065 FOR A NEW AND INNOVATIVE HAIR STYLE call Cathy Hallifax at Déjà vu Salon in Minden, mention this ad for $5 off any hair service (530)518-1166 or (775)782-8776
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markers b) Bic ink c) Play-Doh d) Crayola crayons 9. Two Barbies are sold every __________ somewhere in the world. a) Week b) Day c) Second d) Hour 10. John Lloyd Wright, inventor of this toy, conceived the idea while traveling with his father, Frank Lloyd Wright, in Tokyo. He was inspired by the construction techniques used in the Imperial Hotel, which his father designed. a) Lego b) Erector Set c) Lincoln Logs d) Tinker Toys 11. A platoon of National Guard soldiers would be busy stomping for four years if it wanted to rid the world of this scary classic. a) Creepy Crawler bugs b) Spiders c) Gummy worms d) Jell-O eyeballs 12. The Swahili term for the phrase “to build” is the name of what game? a) Uno b) Sorry c) Monopoly d) Jenga 13. American children spend about 6.3 billion hours per year doing what? a) Sleeping b) Reading c) Riding bicycles d) Coloring 14. What doll collection created the first walking dolls? a) Madame Alexander Jeannie Walker and Friends b) Punky Brewster and Pals c) Jem and the Holograms d) Strawberry Shortcake and Friends 15. What organization is the world’s largest vehicle tire manufacturer? a) Michelin b) U.S. Army c) Matchbox d) Lego 16. The USSR banned what wildly popular American toy in the late 1950s to early 1960s, calling it a symbol of
the emptiness of American culture? a) Hula hoop b) Jump rope c) Skip-It d) Atari (Find the answers on a following page) WEEKLY LAWN CARE, DETHATCH AND AERATION, 15+ years experience, quality service, serving Carson Valley, Carson Valley Lawn Care, Insured (775)230-2546 “YOUR HOMETOWN JUNK HAULER SINCE 1996!” Junk and Trash, etc, Carson Valley/Carson City, $179 a load plus dump fee, J.R.’s Hauling (775)265-6813
Slot Machines
I was on vacation, playing the slot machines. It was my first time in a casino, and I wasn’t sure how the machines operated. “Excuse me,” I said to a casino employee. “How does this work?” The worker showed me how to insert a bill, hit the spin button, and operate the release handle. “And where does the money come out?” I asked. He smiled and motioned to a far wall before saying, “Usually at the ATM.”
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” What does it mean when a cat meows?
ESTATE SALE SERVICES. DOWNSIZING? RELOCATING? Health Issues? No family here to help? Full Liquidations also available, 40 year Local Resident, Call Joi at J&J Estate Sales (775)230-5656 2000 BUICK PARK AVENUE, NICE CAR $2,250; 1937 Hudson, good original $10,000; 1954 Hudson Hornet, rough $2,250 (775)742-5870
Flying Pig Flea Market
Our next dates will be April 13th, 8am-3pm and April 14th 9am-3pm, Fuji Park Building, Carson City. Be a vendor. Come to browse, for information call (775)882-4717 or (775)315-0008 PIONEER GLASS PLUS, RESIDENTIAL, COMMERCIAL, emergency services, fair prices, dependable quick service, quality work, 45 years experience, Frank Boudreau, owner NV#7876 (775)720-2373 STIHL TS700 CUT OFF SAWS, NEVER USED $1,150 or $2,000 for both (775)720-7762 ALPINE TREE SERVICE - TRIMMING, REMOVAL, grinding and lot clearing, no job too small, Licensed, Insured and over 35 years experience (775)721-2880
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When your cat meows in the morning at your bedroom door, it means you have been selfish and cruel, and you would not let it sleep on your head last night. When your cat meows in the morning when you head down the steps to the kitchen, it means, “Yes, I know where my food is, but I want you to walk me over to my bowl and watch me take my first bite.” When your cat meows as you grab your car keys and head to the garage, it means you have your priorities all wrong, you should be staying home to meet their every desire for fun and attention. When your cat meows while you are away at work, it means something awoke them from their nap. It’s usually a single, quiet meow, accompanied by a half-opened eye, and if really necessary, a slight elevation of the head, to see what disturbed them. If only a breeze, a wisp of the air conditioning, or a slight movement of the plants, resuming the nap is appropriate. If there is rapid or repeated movement however, like that humming bird right outside the window, it could lead to immediate attention, cautious stalking, and that ku-ku-ku squeaking sound that means, “Hey, what’s that! I’m going to get it!” When your cat meows as you come home at the end of a hard day at work, you may think it means they missed you. This is a common misconception on the part of humans. What it really means is I want more food, I have an itch on my back and you need to scratch it, or I’ve had a hard day napping on the sofa alone, and I need your lap to make my day complete. When your cat meows as you prepare dinner, then sit down to eat it, it means you have obviously made a mistake. You are clearly preparing their evening meal for them, and somehow you became confused and began eating it yourself. The correct response is for you to apologize, share your dinner, and wait until your cat is done eating to finish off the remaining food. When your cat meows as you prepare for bedtime, it means you’ve forgotten whose house you are living in. It’s very confusing to your cat why you would turn down the covers, then slide into their bed. They are willing to share however, as long as you remember your place in the family. Your best response is to relax and try not to grimace too much when they knead their claws in your stomach, then curl up around your hair before going to sleep. RETIREE LOOKING TO RELOCATE TO AREA, wanting 3 bedroom, 2 bath home on small acreage, needing a large detached shop or barn, country setting yet close to shopping. Mini farm or similar property. If outbuilding needs work that’s fine but house must be nice. dozerjoe@yahoo.com or (360)204-1017 MADAME ALEXANDER DOLL, SCARLET 21” with box $100, other dolls, other sizes (775)392-0044
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The World Through the Eyes of a Kid
When I look at a patch of dandelions, I see a bunch of weeds that are going to take over my yard. My kids see flowers for Mom and blowing white fluff, you can wish on. When I look at an old drunk and he smiles at me, I see a smelly, dirty person who probably wants money and I look away. My kids see someone smiling at them and they smile back. When I hear music I love, I know I can’t carry a tune and don’t have much rhythm so I sit self consciously and listen. My kids feel the beat and move to it. They sing out the words. If they don’t know them, they make up their own. When I feel wind on my face, I brace myself against it. I feel it messing up my hair and pulling me back when I walk. My kids close their eyes, spread their arms and fly with it, until they fall to the ground laughing. When I see a mud puddle, I step around it. I see muddy shoes and clothes and dirty carpets. My kids sit in it. They see dams to build, rivers to cross and worms to play with. When I pray, I say thee and thou and grant me this, give me that. My kids say, “Hi God!!! Thanks for my toys and my friends. Please keep the bad dreams away tonight. Sorry, I don’t want to go to Heaven yet. I would miss my Mommy and Daddy.” I wonder if we are given kids to teach or to learn from? No wonder God loves the little children!!
FRESH BATCH, NEW CROP! ROASTED GARLIC Jam, Carrols Corner, South Yerington, for more information (775)846-8972 or (775)463-1265 USED STOWMASTER TOW BAR, GREAT CONDITION, rated for up to 10,000 pounds $250, Carson City (775)721-3784 JOB HUNTING? CHANGING CAREERS? SEEKING a promotion? Re-entering the job market? Beat the competition with a professional resume created by The Resume Business (775)267-2711
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Recipe for Preparing Your Taxes
Bank in Trouble
Robyn leaves home for college and after several weeks she turns up at home in quite a distressed state. ‘Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice,’ she splutters. ‘I did?’ responds her father, ‘What did I tell you?’ Well, you told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in serious trouble,’ explains Robyn sniffing. ‘What are you talking about? That’s one of the largest banks in the whole country,’ he remarks, ‘there must be some mistake....’ ‘I don’t think so,’ Robyn interrupts, ‘They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, “Insufficient Funds”.’ HYDRAULIC CYLINDER REPAIR AND REBUILD, All makes models and year, Commercial Equipment, Tractors, Log splitters, Farm equipment, Dump Trucks and Trailers, Boats and RVs, Welding and Machining, Ramco Fabrication, shawn@ramcofab.com or (775)267-7358 THOMAS J. BARTELS, HOROLOGIST, CLOCKS old and new repaired and restored. Authorized agent for Howard Miller, Ridgeway, and Sleigh, all work guaranteed! tomjbartels@gmail.com or (775)265-5541 or (775)901-1848
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Begin by emptying your house of all loved ones. This is because your children are not yet old enough to see the behavior you may exhibit in the hours ahead. Send them to church, to the library, or to the movies. Be sure you will have several hours alone to tackle this project. Next, recall that famous line from Dirty Harry, “a man’s got to know his limitations”. Stop for a moment to access your current state before beginning your taxes. Did you relax and pet the dog (or cat) for a few minutes after work to calm down from your commute home in heavy traffic? Have you eaten recently? Did you go for a walk or stretch after eating to be in a reasonable sound physical state? Okay, now you are ready to set up your chosen tax command post. From this location you will want plenty of flat surface area. The kitchen table? And all nearby counter tops. And the seats of the chairs. Or the desk in your study? And all the available floor space and window sills. Be sure you are fully supplied with pens, pencils, erasers, paper clips, scotch tape, and a large waste basket. (Maybe a shredder when you are absolutely, positively, 100 percent certain, you will never-need-that-piece-of-paper again). And this is the 21st century after all. You’ll need your trusty PC. With all the registered trademark software to help with your taxes - Word, Excel, Quicken, Turbo Tax, etc. (Which you confirmed was loaded and working properly over the President’s Day holiday in February). Oh, and did you fill the coffee pot, your favorite brew of rich arabica? It will likely be a long night and you may need all the help you can get! A couple of your favorite chocolate bars nearby would be a nice touch. For later. You know. When you need a little pick-me-up reward. You are doing your taxes after all. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for. Putting off actually. Spread out all your tax receipts in neat and orderly piles. Select a pattern to group them logically. Carefully sort them, paying close attention to which ones go on which piles. Take special care not to spill your coffee on them. After all, “I spilled my coffee on them” is right up there with “the dog at my homework” if you know what I mean. Now open your tax forms or tax software. Stare blankly for a few moments. Cry if you need to. Have another cup of coffee. It’s also time for your second chocolate candy bar. Savor the moment. Finally, gather up all the forms, all the files, and all the receipts. Place them all in a large cardboard box. Welcome your kids home and enjoy a moment with them before bedtime. And tomorrow, take the big box and your checkbook to a trusted tax professional, they love this stuff! REDLINE CONSTRUCTION, INC., SPECIALIZING in garages, additions, remodels, decks, patio covers, free estimates, NV#0080432, (775)781-3955
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” The 30th Annual Kids’ Fishing Derby
Learning by Example...
Little Johnny was caught swearing by his teacher. “Johnny,” she said, “you shouldn’t use that kind of language. Where did you hear such talk, anyway?” “My daddy said it,” he responded. “Well, that doesn’t matter,” explained the teacher. “You don’t even know what it means.” “I do, too!” Little Johnny retorted. “It means the car won’t start.” MIKES HORSESHOEING SERVICE, 34 YEARS experience! Serving Carson Valley and surrounding areas! Mike Romine (775)350-0351 RENNER’S TRUE VALUE HARDWARE - FOR ALL YOUR hardware, household, automotive and gardening needs and much more now available online at truevalue.com, ship orders to store for free, call Megan or Gilbert for details (775)465-2217, press 1 for parts, 2289 Hwy. 208, Smith, NV WINTER AIN’T OVER UNTIL IT’S OVER; STEEL 16X6 wheels and plastic hubcaps for your Subaru snow tires, fits 1990-1999, 2005-2009, 2009 thru 2013 Crosstrek, Legacy, Forester and Outback $80 with caps (775)267-1515
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This year’s derby will be held June 1st and 2nd, 2019 at Lampe Park in Gardnerville; hosting all children ages 3-12. Tickets to attend this volunteer run event are free; however, you must pre-register to receive a free session ticket. Derby hats, t-shirts and other resale items will be available for purchase. Raffle tickets are available for $1 each or 6 for $5. This year’s derby will be held June 1st and 2nd, 2019 at Lampe Park in Gardnerville; hosting all children ages 3-12. Tickets to attend this volunteer run event are free; however, you must pre-register to receive a free session ticket. Derby hats, t-shirts and other resale items will be available for purchase. Raffle tickets are available for $1 each or 6 for $5. Registration forms, for mail-in only, are available at the Douglas County Parks and Recreation Department in the Community Center in Gardnerville. Registration and volunteer sign-ups will begin on April 6th and will continue every Saturday through the month of May from 10am-1pm at the Gardnerville Walgreens. Volunteers are needed to help set up, tear down, register, river help, fish cleaning and more. If you are interested in becoming a volunteer, please pick up a volunteer form at the Parks/Recreation Department and mail it in or stop by Walgreens starting April 6th. For further information, please contact (KFDVolunteers@aol.com) or Laura Ramirez (775)430-0592, Heather Gertsch (775)684-9018, Tiffany Ellis (775)782-2182. For sponsorship/fundraising contact Steve Hamilton (775) 392-3579 FOUR BRIDGESTONE TIRES, VERY GOOD CONDITION, LT265/70R17, load range E121 mag, mud and snow, off of a Silverado 2500 truck $150 (775)225-0963 TAKE CARE OF YOUR LOVED ONES. WILLS and Trusts. Day R. Williams, Attorney at Law, 1601 Fairview Drive, Suite C., Carson City, NV. Call Day today! (775)885-8398
Happy Birthday Nova!
As you look back on yesterday, may your memories be warm ones. As you celebrate your April 19th birthday, may your heart be filled with happiness and joy. As you look ahead to tomorrow, may your deepest hopes and dreams come true for you! Love, your Mom in law! PET CARE SERVICE! JODY WADDING, OWNER since 1991, references available, boarding offered or visit your home; horses, dogs, cats, reptiles, birds, fish… JWPetCare@aol.com (775)782-1212 or (775)781-1065
April is Alcohol Awareness Month
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Addictions in America
Alcoholism affects people from all walks of life. According to the United States Centers for Disease Control (CDC/2018), more than 88,000 people die from alcohol-related deaths each year in the United States. Alcoholism has a profound effect on the entire body, especially the brain, heart, pancreas, mouth, liver and immune system. In spite of its negative impact, more Americans than ever before consume alcohol on a regular basis. Alcohol continues to be one of the nation’s most preventable causes of death. More than 15 million people struggle with an alcohol use disorder in the United States, but less than eight percent of those receive treatment. Alcohol-impaired driving accounts for more than 30 percent of all driving fatalities each year. Drunk driving costs the United States more than $199 billion every year. Every day, more than 130 people in the United States die after overdosing on opioids. The misuse of and addiction to opioids—including prescription pain relievers, heroin, and synthetic opioids such as fentanyl—is a serious national crisis that affects public health as well as social and economic welfare. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that the total “economic burden” of prescription opioid misuse alone in the United States is $78.5 billion a year, including the costs of healthcare, lost productivity, addiction treatment, and criminal justice involvement.
You know you are getting old...
when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while you’re down there. CALLING ALL CONTRACTORS. IF YOU OWN a small construction company and are finding it hard to keep up with the bookkeeping, payroll and or taxes we’re your answer. Pro-Balanced Bookkeeping and Tax Service (775)246-3363 1996 TERRY 32’ 5TH WHEEL TRAVEL TRAILER, Sleeps 6, 2 Slides, fully contained, $6,500 OBO, call (775)463-1869 FIREWOOD, SEASONED, SPLIT, ALMOND ONLY $420 a cord, cut to size, under 16”, 16”-18”, 18”-22”, delivery available, Jon (775)246-7186 COLT 1873 SAA, ORIGINAL HOLSTER plus 32-20 caliber made in 1890, fair condition $1,850 (775)8424065 PAINTER, SEMI-RETIRED WITH 40 YEARS experience in Nevada, Save Money, Get Seasonal Discount Now, inside or out, Fences (775)901-1912
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MINOR TO MAJOR AUTOMOTIVE REPAIRS, Tires and More! ASE Certified Master Mechanic, 35 years same location! Senior Discounts, Bobs Shell Service, Carson City (775)883-7919 2003 GMC PICKUP, 2500HD SLE, DIESEL, EXTENDED cab, 4WD, 6½’ box, camper shell, Alloy wheels, very good condition, 164,000 miles, red $11,500 (775)315-2734
Have Faith...
A climber fell off a cliff, and as he tumbled down, he caught hold of a small branch wedged in the rock. “HELP! IS THERE ANYBODY UP THERE?” he shouted. A majestic voice boomed through the gorge: “I will help you, my son, but first you must have faith in me.” “Yes, yes, I trust you!” cried the man. “Let go of the branch,” boomed the voice. There was a long pause, and the man shouted up again, “IS THERE ANYONE ELSE UP THERE I COULD TALK TO?” VOICE AND PIANO LESSONS, BEGINNER to Advanced students, experienced teacher, performer, music degree. Call The Songlady! Carolyn Lancaster (775)720-1918
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BUILT BY ROBERT; DESIGN AND REMODEL (interior and exterior) handyman, landscape design and installation, 30 years of experience, Highly competitive quotes, Senior discounts, Call Robert at (775)508-8404
Berean Bible Church Christ Alone!
Sunday Worship Service 9:30am; Children’s Sunday School provided. Women’s Bible Study – 2nd and 4th Friday 8am; Men Bible Study – Fridays 8am; CoEd Bible Study – Tuesdays 5pm. 1516 Hwy. 395, Gardnerville (in the HAAS Center) bereanbible.church or call (775)7823931 HELP! I AM IN SEARCH OF SPECIALS FROM 1950-60’s American and/or European powered cars. Maybe steel, aluminum, fiberglass or combination. Cars created by enthusiast for pleasure or racing, contact (775)291-6827 $200 OFF ANY COMPLETE ROOFING JOB, NEW roof, re-roof, repairs, 10% off for repairs, $100 maximum, must present ad for discount, over 25 years experience, Licensed, Bonded and Insured, Tom Goldston Roofing, “Where Quality is Remembered Long After the Price is Forgotten” NV Lic#58203 (775)790-2461
Signature Please!
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched. CUSTOM BUILT LEFT-HANDED STOCKED Rifle, 17-222 Ackley Magnum, Post 1964 Winchester action, Shilen Barrel, laminated Walnut-Maple left hand thumb hole stock, 3 to 9 Tasco Pronghorn Scope, complete set of 3 sizing dies, 3 boxes live ammunition, tri pod, cleaning rod, leather sling and hard case (775)2655961 HANDYMAN SERVICES, WOOD DECK RESURFACING and repair, interior doors, windows and interior/exterior trim, Honey-Do’s, etc. Serving Carson Valley (775)315-2235
April 21st- Happy Easter! 19
“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Marry Again
A woman confided to her girlfriend, “My ex-husband wants to marry me again.” The friend said, “How flattering.” The woman replied, “Not really. I think he’s after the money I married him for.” SMITH VALLEY IRRIGATION – SERVING NEVADA and Sierra Communities for 40 Years with Ag Irrigation Systems and Parts (775)465-2316 1986 14’ MIRROCRAFT ALUMINUM FISHING boat with trailer, 25HP Mercury 2 stroke, trolling motor, 3 seats, a lot of extras $1,300 OBO (775)781-0841
Accepting Applications...
The Douglas County School District is currently accepting applications for: Substitute School Bus Drivers , Starting Salary: $15.42/hour, Varied Hours up to 40 hours a week, Apply online: dcsd.k12.nv.us WANTED: LICENSE PLATES AND FRAMES, WANTED: Musical instruments, Wanted: Motorcycle helmets 1940-1980, John (775)315-4930
Loose-Fitting
Lucy teaches many aerobic classes. She told a lady who was looking to sign up for the class to just wear loosefitting clothing to the class. “Honey,” the lady replied, “if I had any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn’t be signing up for an exercise class.” 2005 37’ TOY HAULER TRAILER, ONE SLIDE OUT, outside shower, fuel station and generator $11,500 OBO (775)720-7762 JR POWER SPORTS! WE SERVICE AND REPAIR, ALL makes, models and years; Quads, OHV, Dirt and Street Bikes; from tune up to full rebuild. 35 years experience! Dayton, jrpowersports.com or (775)241-2530 CASH PAID FOR OLD COSTUME JEWELRY: Rhinestones, Mexican and Indian Tourist Jewelry, Rings, Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins, Men’s Jewelry, Old Plastics, Silver, Copper, Glass Beads, Men’s and Women’s Old Wind Up Watches, Charm Bracelets, Lockets etc. Larger quantities preferred. I drive to you. Joanne, please leave clear message (775)465-9422 RUGER MINI 14, LIKE NEW, IN BOX, .223 CALIBER, wood stock $795 (775)842-4065
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HIGH ROLLERS PAINTING FOR ALL YOUR PAINTING needs! Competitive rates and quality workmanship, bonded and insured, NV#44048, highrollerspainting.net or (775)267-2534
Texas
At the urging of his doctor, Bill moved to Texas. After settling in, he met a neighbor who was also an older man. “Say, is this really a healthy place?” “It sure is,” the man replied. “When I first arrived here, I couldn’t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn’t have the strength to walk across a room and I had to be lifted out of bed.” “That’s wonderful!” said Bill. “How long have you been here?” “I was born here.” MIGUEL’S GARDEN SERVICE, FULL LAWN MAINTENANCE, clean up, fertilizing, dead shrubs and trees pulled out, excellent references, great rates, serving Carson Valley 27+ years! (775)265-0501 WANTED: KNIVES – FOLDING, HUNTING; MILITARY, New or used, any quantity. Wanted: Tobacco Pipes – Used or new, any quantity, Jeff (775)720-2577 2003 CHEVY SILVERADO 1500 Z71 4X4 EXTENDED Cab Truck, well maintained, runs well, one owner, 266,500 miles $4,900 OBO, Wellington (775)230-8944
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Bingo- Tahoe/Douglas Elks
Come and Play! First and Third Fridays of each month, 1227 Kimmerling, Gardnerville Ranchos, Questions (775)267-1362 TWO PIECE SECTIONAL SOFA; ROUND coffee table with Gold Leaf Underglass, tables, Lamps (775)267-3867 HANDYMAN - 30+ YEARS EXPERIENCE, FREE estimates, senior and military discounts, low rates, Jerry/ Gardnerville (760)219-2296 LARRY’S TRACTOR SERVICE, CLEANUP WORK, rototilling, backhoe, box scraper, dump trailer, rake, hole drilling, affordable rates (775)267-2245 or (775)690-4632 SEW-WHAT UPHOLSTERY, CUSTOM work, leather and antiques, 40+ years experience, Carson Valley, Leslie (775)901-2035 CUSTOM CANVAS WORK! REPAIR, RE-STITCH, Replace; Boat Covers, Cockpit and Bow Covers, Snaps, Grommets, Velcro, Zippers, Reinforcements, Jim/Minden (775)267-4434 or (775)230-8706
In Case of Emergency
A guy enters a hospital to have a minor operation. A nurse begins to take down his information: name, insurance company, etc. “In case of emergency, whom should we notify?” “You mean if I become very sick?” “Well . . . yes.” “If that happens, call a doctor!” HOME REPAIR PRO, MR. FIX IT, ANY OUTSIDE/ INSIDE repairs, big or small, flat rate $40 per hour (775)691-5119 G & J LANDSCAPING MAINTENANCE, TRIM, prune, fertilize, aerate, sprinklers, General clean-up, Free Estimates, Victor (775)291-1672 LAWN CARE SERVICE! AERATING, THATCHING, Mowing, Trimming, Pruning, Sprinklers/Repair, General Yard Clean Up, Free Estimates, 10+ Years Experience, Ruben (775)430-3585 WALTHER P-38 9MM POST WAR, NICE semi automatic pistol $420 (775)842-4065
April 22nd- Earth Day 22
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Rules for Being Human
1) You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around. 2) You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid. 3) There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial and error, experimentation. The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately “works”. 4) A lesson is repeated until learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson. 5) Learning lessons does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned. 6) “There” is no better than “here”. When your “there” has become a “here”, you will simply obtain another “there” that will, again, look better than “here.” 7) Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself. 8) What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is
up to you. The choice is yours. 9) Your answers lie inside you. The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust. 10) You will forget all this. CRAFTSMAN CONSTRUCTION LLC, Specializing in Painting, Remodels, Tile, Finish Carpentry, Decks, Home Repairs, Window and Door Replacement, Quality Workmanship with over 28 years experience, free estimates, NV Lic.60315, NVPainting Lic.82727 Find us on Facebook or (775)690-1749 PELLET HEARTH STOVE WITH ALL ACCESSORIES/hardware $1,000 OBO (775)790-3800 SEMI RETIRED PAINTER, INTERIOR, EXTERIOR and cabinets, no two-story houses, based in Minden area, call John (775)267-1800 COMPLETE LANDSCAPING, RESIDENTIAL and commercial, weekly maintenance, tree trimming, emergency repairs, sprinklers/drip, pavers, patios, retaining walls, Davenport Landscape and Design, NV Lic.#0074827, davenportlandscape.com or (775)2651491 or (775)721-8439
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” Facts You May Not Know About Dandelions
Effects of Anesthesia...
A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside. His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, “You’re beautiful.” Flattered, the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later, her husband woke up and said, “You’re cute.” “What happened to ‘beautiful?’” she asked him. “The drugs are wearing off,” he replied. HANDY HAMILTONS HANDYMAN SERVICES, Experienced Handyman, Quality work at a fair price, Free estimates, Call Mark Hamilton (775)720-9595 TIRED OF BEING DULL? I SHARPEN CHEFS knives, scissors of all types, clipper blades, TJ’S Sharpening (775)841-1079 MINK COAT, ¾ LENGTH, AUTUMN HAZE, HAS belt for sporty look, hardly worn, excellent condition (775)267-3867 “A MOVING EXPERIENCE” - MOVE ASSISTANCE, 25 years experience, Senior Discounts! Ken Jeter, kenjeter65@gmail.com or (775)530-8932
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1. Dandelions are not indigenous to North America. Europeans brought them to North America because they’re chock full of so many good things. 2. The French have another name for them - “pee the bed” The French word [for dandelion] is pissenlit, which translates to “pee the bed.” Dandelions are a diuretic and in fact they are as strong as some of the commercial products. 3. Dandelions are full of vitamins - The leaves, the flowers and the roots are edible. A cup of dandelion greens would give you about 112 per cent of your recommended daily amount of vitamin A and 535 per cent of your recommended daily amount of vitamin K, and other things like calcium, iron and magnesium. 4. You might already be eating dandelions - You actually are eating dandelion leaves in your mesclun salads. They’re commercialized now. People raise them and harvest them. 5. The English name “dandelion” comes from “tooth of the lion” in French - “Dent de lion” in French translates to “tooth of the lion” in English. The weed was given its name because of the way the leaves are etched- some people thought the leaves looked like a lion’s mouth. 6. Dandelions became unpopular because they’re so successful - Dandelions are a perennial and that means they come back year after year if you don’t do something to make that impossible, and they’re very successful seeders. Their seeds are on little parachutes that go flying wherever there’s a breeze, landing in all kinds of interesting places. They’re very good at putting down the little fork bottoms of their seeds and embedding themselves in the earth and springing up again. 7. Dandelions are very good at adapting -You can mow those dandelions all you like. Yes, it will take off the worst of those flowers, but they will come back. It won’t get rid of them. What happens is that the dandelions spread their leaves out and nothing can grow underneath it. After a little while it kills your grass. After you mow them, they will still send out seeds, because they want to make seeds and survive. Maybe five years down the road instead of grass, we’ll have dandelions. 8. You can kill dandelions yourself -There are little things individuals can do. You can kill dandelions with hot water - just pour boiling water on them. You can pour extra strength vinegar that you can buy at a garden centre, not the stuff from your cupboard, over them. You could take one of those weed torches and just touch the leaves with it, and that should kill them. A long-term strategy is to get corn gluten meal. It doesn’t kill the dandelion, but it does reduce the ability of the dandelion to grow, because it’s a deterrent for seed development. It may take several years, though, and you have to go after the base root, because they are perennials. 9. There are several superstitions involving dandelions, including making a wish and blowing off all the dandelion seeds to make a wish come true. Continued...
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” RESIDENTIAL CLEANING, LICENSED, BONDED and insured with references, Free estimates, great cleaning, fair prices, Samantha (775)220-4252
Happy 60th Birthday to my Sissy!
My sister, Our hearts have grown closer with the passing of time. Through the ups and downs of life... we’ve come to understand what it means to have each other. Sometimes we talk often... sometimes not. It doesn’t seem to matter because the feelings of closeness remain with me all the time because I know you are always there. “I love you, sissy… What a blessing it is to have you as my sister!” Happy Birthday, Love you much, Lisa 2015 POLARIS RANGER 900XP WITH 1/2 FRONT windshield and rear window $9,000 OBO (775)790-3800 ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A GREAT ESCAPE close to home? Eagle Lake, Lassen County Vacation Rentals, Trophy Trout, all water sports, furnished cabins from $60 per night or $360 per week, visit our website at eaglelakeheritage.com or (800)459-5179 PIANO AND ORGAN PRIVATE INSTRUCTIONS, Member of Sierra Organ Club, Call Joanne Booth in Sunridge, Carson City (775)267-2429
When I was a kid, you’d hold a dandelion under your chin, and if it showed yellow under your chin, that meant you like butter. It goes to show that dandelions have been part of our daily life for a long time. They become part of the myths and the magic of who we are. (CBC News) YARD ENHANCEMENT SERVICES, handyman, fence repair/rebuild, tree and brush trim/removal, defensible space improvement, hauling, dump runs, Carson Valley area, Kelly (209)352-0084 WILL TEAR DOWN AND BUY OLD WOODEN Barns and Barn Wood! Insured and bonded (775)782-9192
Credit Card Spending
A man receives a call from his Credit Card Company, “Sir, we have detected an unusual pattern of spending on your card, and we are calling to see if everything is alright.” “Yes,” replied the man. “My card was stolen over a month ago.” “Why didn’t you report your card as stolen?” asked the card company representative. The man replied, “Well, whoever stole my card is spending a lot less than my wife!”
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Bread is Crummy for Ducks and Geese Health
Ducks’ and Geese natural foods vary by species, but most have a pretty diverse diet. Mallards, for example, eat a mix of plants and seeds as well as insects, worms, snails and crustaceans. Bread may offer calories, but it has few of the nutrients ducks can get from their environment. And once you’re full of bread, who wants to forage? “White bread in particular has no real nutritional value, so while birds may find it tasty, the danger is that they will fill up on it instead of other foods that could be more beneficial to them. And in young birds, malnutrition may lead to Angel Wing, a deformity in which wings jut out instead of folding up, often making flight impossible. This can occur due to a high-calorie diet, especially if it’s low in vitamin D, vitamin E and manganese. The combination of extra energy and inadequate nutrients makes a bird’s wings outgrow its wrist joints, causing disfigurement that’s usually incurable by adulthood. The relative prevalence of angel wing at some parks is often blamed on bread. Some of the bread we toss to waterfowl inevitably escapes their grasp. If enough calorie-rich foods accumulate in a pond, they — along with all those extra duck droppings — can trigger algae blooms that deplete oxygen from the water. Known as hypoxia, this can wipe out pond life and rob birds of natural food supplies. continued.....
On land, any moldy leftovers lying around could be particularly dangerous if eaten. This is also a risk when people feed waterfowl bread that has already spoiled, and it is potentially fatal. If you are compelled to feed the local waterfowl feed them: Corn (canned, frozen or fresh), Duck pellets (sold online and at pet stores), Lettuce, other greens (torn into small pieces), Frozen peas (defrosted), Oats (rolled or instant), Seeds (including birdseed or other varieties). MADAME ALEXANDER DOLLS FROM THE 1980’S, made in USA, all sizes with original boxes (775)392-0044 SUTRO LANDSCAPING, ONE CALL DOES IT all; lawn care, aerating and thatching, sprinkler systems, sod installation and planting, clean-ups and much more, Free Estimates, Operated by owner, NV#50048 (775)246-4871 or (775)291-3095
Permission
Son: “Dad, when will I be old enough so I don’t have to ask mom for her permission to go out?” Dad: “Son, even I haven’t grown old enough to go out without her permission!”
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” What Parents had to do Before the Internet/Social Media
INJURED INK TATTOOS - $100 PER HOUR for a limited time! 2049 California St. #2 Carson City, NV. Call Today! (775)515-4444 SEW HAPPY SEWING SCHOOL, 1 ON 1 HAND sewing and sewing machine classes, 3 years and older, Whiskers and Twinkle Easter Bunnies class available, Shirley shirleyrash@gmail.com (775)267-4772
Take Off Pounds Sensibly!
TOPS is a non-profit weight loss support program. Meets Thursdays 9am to 10am at Douglas County Community Center; Drop-in or for more information call Juanita (775)267-9471 or Marcia (775)783-7620 1998 DODGE DAKOTA SLT, 4X4, V8, ALL NEW TIRES, brakes, serpentine belt, water pump, fuel pump, front axles, major tune up and drive train service, 235,000 miles, asking $4,000 OBO (775)781-6037 GREATER HEALTH IS WITHIN YOUR REACH! Customized Wellness Coaching and Nutrition Consulting. Wellness Coaching, Whole Body Tune-up, Healthy Weight Management, Meal Planning, and more. Call now for complimentary consultation. www.positivelywhole.com (702)460-7205
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Have you ever wondered why parents can’t understand why leaving your phone at home is such a big deal, or what it’s like to have a serious case of FOBO? Well, it’s hard to imagine a world without social media or google, but when they were teens, the Internet didn’t exist! Can you imagine a world without Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, or Google, where every important piece of information you could ever need (from the history notes from today’s class to Miley’s latest Instagram post) weren’t right at your fingertips? Well, mom and dad lived in that world, and this is what it was like... 1. They had to meet in person when they had a group project. There was no Facebook or Google Docs to make meeting totally unnecessary, which meant they had to ask all the hard, embarrassing questions in person. 2. They actually went to the library and consulted actual books to get the answers to a question. There was no Google to give them the meaning of life. 3. And when they went to the library, they found their books using a filing system with thousands of index cards called the Dewey Decimal system. There were no computers to look up book titles (and get a map to the book’s exact location). 4. They had to go to an actual store to buy the hottest new albums. And buy physical CDs or cassette tapes, because there was no iTunes to download it in 10 seconds. 5. They had to go to the store to get their photos printed in order to see them, and then they had to share them with friends in physical albums. In person. With no filter. *GASP* There were no digital cameras that let you check your selfies right after taking them. And there was no Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter to share their photos instantly. 6. They actually had to watch their fave TV show live when it aired. Which meant the whole family had to crowd onto the couch to watch together, because there was no DVR or Netflix to watch it later, at their convenience. And if they missed it, they couldn’t go online to get the recap. They had to hope their friends could remember every single important detail. 7. And to make it worse, they had to watch one episode at a time. There was no such thing as a Netflix binge back then. 8. Newspapers were actually used to get the news. Now that there’s YouTube and Twitter to get all the latest news instantly, newspapers are best used for arts and crafts projects. 9. They had to use actual paper maps to get from point A to point B. They didn’t have GPS’s or smart phones with Google Maps to tell them exactly where to go. 10. They had to manually turn their clocks back during daylights savings. The digital powers that be didn’t magically change all their clocks back for them. 11. They had to actually call people on the phone. Skip-
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
ping class required serious acting skills. They couldn’t send their teachers an email at the last minute with their paper attached telling them they were too sick to actually come to class. They had to call them and try to pretend to be sick. 12. They had to politely disagree about things. Because before Twitter and the YouTube comments section existed, people had to express their opinions in person instead of behind anonymous profiles. 13. When there was nothing to, they had to find something semi-productive to do. In other words, when there were no friends to hang out with, or anywhere fun to go, they were forced to do things like read, write, paint, exercise, and other productive things like that. Entire weekends couldn’t be spent on the couch binge-watching their favorite shows. A BAD TILE JOB CAN BE LIKE A BAD HAIRCUT, but it doesn’t grow back, so don’t get hacked! Done right the first time, Sundance Tile and Marble, NV#58795 (775)691-9954 PERFECTO GARDENING SERVICES, SERVING Carson Valley over 20 Years! Tree and Bush trimming, lawn care, competitive rates and all work guaranteed (775)265-7081
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Hospital Policy
A friend of mine was in the hospital awaiting the arrival of her first child. When I telephoned the hospital to see if the baby had arrived, the nurse said it had. I asked if it was a boy or girl and was told that it was against hospital policy to give this information over the phone. “Fine,” I said. “I can understand that. But can you tell me what she didn’t have?” “It wasn’t a boy,” came the reply. PUBLISHER’S NOTICE: All real estate advertising in this paper is subject to the Fair Housing Act which makes it illegal to advertise “any preference, limitations or discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status or national origin, or an intention to make any such preference, limitation or discrimination.” This magazine will not knowingly accept any advertisement for real estate which is a violation of the law; our readers are hereby informed that all dwellings advertised in this publication are available on an equal opportunity basis. To complain of discrimination call HUD toll-free. OLD ORIGINAL BB GUN, RED RYDER model 40, all wood $90 (775)842-4065
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Answers to Toy Trivia Quiz
1. b. From 1952 to 1963 parents had to supply real potatoes for the body of Mr. Potato Head, until 1964 when Hasbro introduced a hard plastic body. 2. d. Two years after the Easy-Bake Oven’s introduction by Hasbro, children could make bubble gum with it. 3. d. Play-Doh, whose ingredients are still a secret, was introduced only in off-white. 4. c. During the 1953 coronation of Queen Elizabeth II, Madame Alexander commemorated the event on CBS by dressing 36 dolls in historically accurate costumes made with cloth from the same mill that produced the actual coronation mantles. 5. c. Clue: The Movie, starring Tim Curry, Madeline Kahn, and Christopher Lloyd, was the first movie ever based on a board game. 6. d. There have been five billion Monopoly houses built since 1935. 7. a. Binney & Smith produces more than 1,500 pounds of Silly Putty each day -- that’s more than 20,000 eggs. 8. d. According to a Yale University study, Crayola crayons rank 18th among the 20 most recognizable scents to American adults. Coffee and peanut butter are first and second. 9. c. Every second, two Barbie dolls are sold somewhere in the world, making the total number sold in the billions
throughout 140 countries. 10. c. The earthquake-proof design of the Imperial Hotel inspired son John Lloyd Wright to create Lincoln Logs in 1916. 11. a. It would take a platoon of National Guard soldiers four years to stamp out all the bugs included in Creepy Crawler sets to date. 12. d. It was natural for game creator Leslie Scott to name her stacking game Jenga, after the Swahili word for “to build” since Swahili was her first language. 13. d. Children ages 2 to 8 spend an average of 28 minutes each day coloring. All the kids in the U.S. spend a combined total of 6.3 billion hours on coloring annually. 14. a. Jeannie Walker and the Walker doll line, created in 1942 by Madame Alexander, were the first walking dolls. 15. d. The Lego Company is the world’s biggest vehicle tire manufacturer producing 311 million tiny tires in 2001. 16. a. Nearly 25 million hula hoops were sold in four months during 1958 and 1959 in the U.S., but the toy was banned in Japan and the USSR.
CUSTOM MASONRY, ONE BRICK AT A TIME, Commercial/Residential, 3+ Better Business Bureau rating, serving Carson Valley 12+ years, Free Estimates, M Sqrd Masonry, NV#200616647 and CA#924187, Marc Duryee (775)450-6219 or (775)783-4753
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Cereal Boxes
Twenty years I’ve been eating outta cereal boxes, and you gotta give it to em’. They stayed firm and refused to move with the times. I mean they know the resealable ziplock bag exists, but they’ve never backed down. No matter how many times the fold-in top rips or the plastic bag tears on the wrong edge, they say “No innovation, we say no!” FIREWOOD, DOUGLAS FIR, BURNS CLEAN, LITTLE ASH, $325 cord, delivery available (775)291-9805 or (775)309-3639 KING SIZE MEMORY FOAM MATTRESS AND foundation, good condition $200, after 6pm, Jerry (775)266-4846 WANTED OLD JEEPS (41-75) AND MILITARY vehicles, Antique tractors, old motorcycles or bicycles, old aircraft parts or pieces, private collector, send me a text with photo, price, location of item, Royce (775)232-2038
Dear John Letter
A soldier serving overseas, far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back. He went out and collected from his friends, all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together and sent them back with a note saying: “Regret - cannot remember which one is you - please keep your photo and return the others.” S&W 50 CALIBER MAGNUM, 4” STAINLESS REVOLVER, like new, Compensator, Holster, 70 rounds $900 (775)450-5621 HOME IN NEED OF IMPROVEMENT? ADDITIONS, remodels, garages, we do it all! Free estimates, 21 years experience, Carson Valley Construction Company LLC, NV#0074855 (775)291-1453
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Mind Your Planet
April is earth awareness month, yet there are many things we can do all year long to provide a healthier environment for our future generations. A good place to start is with ourselves and in our homes. We are physically, mentally, and spiritually better equipped to help others and our planet when we take care of ourselves first. Detoxifying our bodies on a regular basis and eating a nutrient rich diet will remove harmful toxins that we are continually exposed to daily, and will strengthen our immune system to help prevent the onset of disease. Toxins come from the air, water, food as heavy metals, plastics, pesticides, genetically modified organisms, preservatives, additives, carbon monoxide, chlorine, fluoride, prescription and OTC drugs, electromagnetic fields, radiation, and more. We can reduce our toxic load by eliminating harmful chemicals in our homes found in cleaning and laundry supplies, carpets, furniture, air fresheners, beauty supplies and cosmetics. Cleaning with vinegar, baking soda, castile soap, and essential oils are all healthier alternatives, and less expensive than commercial made brands. You can make your own body and facial cleansers too! Reduce your waste by substituting plastics with reusable grocery and produce bags, glass or stainless steel storage containers. Remember to recycle your paper, plastics, aluminum, and glass. Eating less meat reduces greenhouse gases, and saves 2000 gallons of water per pound of meat. We can all be stewards of our planet and make a difference! We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children. . . Author Unknown.Miriam is a Certified Wellness Coach and Holistic Nutrition Consultant. www.positivelywhole.com. WHITE CARAVAN TOP OFF 1996 CHEVY SHORTBED, double doors, sliding window $2,000 OBO (775)790-3800 ACME BOAT & RV STORAGE – RESIDENT MANAGER, fenced, lighted, lowest rates around, Gardnerville (775)265-4766
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HORIZONTAL DRILL PRESS $150; 24’ ALUMINUM extension ladder $50; Delta 12’ Planer $150; Upright Freezer $150; Hitachi 16’ Miter Saw Model #C15FB $250; Metal Foundation stakes, 3’ and 4’, $2 each; 17” wheels off F-150 $150; truck tool box off Ranger $50 (775)720-0793 $69 SERVICE CALL, ACADEMY APPLIANCE Service; washers, dryers, refrigerators, ranges, dishwashers, compactors, some areas extra charge, Serving Carson Valley (775)781-4725
The publisher does not assume any responsibility for the contents of any advertising herein, and all representation or warranties made in such advertising are those of the advertisers and not the publishers. STEINWAY PIANO 1853 CIRCA; MEDIUM SIZE Black Upright Piano, great for beginners, both in great condition, email infocourthouseproducts@charter.net or call (775)265-1480 ALLERGIES AND DUST A PROBLEM? WHOLE house air duct cleaning special $499, all vents, returns, heater and ac cleaned and sanitized, dryer vent cleaning $99, call Peake Air, NV#260831 (775)392-0994
Zip It!
My mother taught for 11 years at a day-care center. One winter afternoon she was trying to show a young boy how to zip up his coat. “The secret,” Mom said, “is to get this piece of the zipper to fit in the other side before you try to zip it up.” After struggling with the zipper for several minutes, the boy sighed and said, “Why does it have to be a secret?” INVEST IN YOUR OWN SELF-CARE INSURANCEEat Your Way To Remarkable Health! Personalized Nutrition Consulting and Wellness Coaching. Healthy weight management, lifestyle management, nutrition support for diabetes, heart condition, digestive disorders, autoimmune, Alzheimer’s, detoxification programs, meal planning, and more. Reclaim Your Health Now! Call now for complimentary consultation. www. positivelywhole.com (775)515-8580 MONUMENTS UNLIMITED, HEADSTONES, curbing, granite and concrete, all colors available, quality work (775)720-1627 GET FAST INTERNET! UP TO 40 MBPS, WIRELESS! (not satellite, not DSL). Great in rural areas, www.rural-internet.us or call Patrick (775)297-4777
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
Happy April Birthdays!
“On your birthday we wish for you that whatever you want most in life it comes to you just the way you imagined it or better. Happy birthday!”
RENT ME FOR SPRING CLEANING, PUT A roll-off dumpster at your home, you load, we remove (775)2972320
LAWN MAINTENANCE SERVICE, YARD CLEANING, mowing, sprinkler repairs, thatching, tree trimming, pruning, low prices with high quality, Martin M. Maintenance Services (530)721-5350
GV CBD FULL SPECTRUM LOCALLY ORGANIC grown products. Pain inflammation, Anxiety, Neuropathy, Studies show relief, NDOA licensed-tested, www. gvorganiccbd.com (775)790-0889
HANDYMAN FOR ALL YOUR OUTSIDE NEEDS, yard cleanup, power wash, fence repair, minor jobs, free estimates, NV#11376PC (775)246-9899
Douglas Democrats Monthly Meeting…
Thursday, March 28th from 6:30pm to 8:30pm at their headquarters 1758 US-395 N, Unit K, (Ironwood Center), Minden. Presentation and discussion. Gather and chat 6:30 pm meeting starts at 7:00 pm sharp, April meeting will be on Thursday, April 25th, www.douglasdems.org or (775)783-1903 GENEALOGY - THOROUGH RESEARCH OF FAMILY histories. A unique gift for weddings, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays or yourself! www.PersonalPedigree. com or Lisa (775)450-3175
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Three Old Couples...
were having tea one fine day. They were all chatting and whatnot when one of the men, trying to get a chuckle, said to his wife, “Pass the honey, honey!” Getting the chuckle he expected, he carried on. A moment later, the second man said, “Pass the sugar, sugar!” This got a bit of a bigger laugh, so the third man, although not quite as clever or quick-witted as the other two, decided to join in the fun. He waited for the perfect opportunity, cleared his throat and then confidently said, “Pass the tea, bag!” D R LANDSCAPING, DEFENSIBLE SPACE, TREE work and yard cleanups, sprinkler repairs, weed abatement, house and garage clean ups, Dave (775)671-0808
April 24th- Admin Assistants Day
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Easter Fun Facts for Kids
The date of Easter changes every year. This is because Easter falls on the first Sunday after the full moon following the March equinox. However, this always occurs on or between March 22nd and April 25th. Easter is the Christian celebration of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is the oldest Christian tradition. It is also considered to be the most important date on the Christian calendar. Easter marks the end of the 40-day period of Lent, which is a traditional time of fasting that begins on Ash Wednesday. The week before Easter is known as Holy Week. This begins on Palm Sunday and includes Maundy Thursday (the day of the Last Supper), Good Friday (the day of Christ’s crucifixion) and Holy Saturday (the time between the crucifixion and resurrection). Eggs are associated with Easter because eggs (along with milk and meat) were forbidden during Lent. Any remaining eggs would be used up on the day before Lent, Shrove Tuesday, which is also known as Pancake Tuesday. The eggs accumulated during Lent would then be eaten at Easter. Eggs are also associated with Easter since they are a symbol of fertility and rebirth, linking them with springtime and with the celebration of the resurrection. continued...
Decorating Easter eggs first began with the custom of staining eggs red to symbolize the bloodshed by Christ during the crucifixion. The practice of painting Easter eggs is called pysanka. Easter is celebrated in different ways around the world. In Sweden, instead of an Easter Bunny, they have an Easter Wizard, and the kids dress as witches and wizards like our Halloween! (They aren’t alone- Easter means different things to many different cultures). SENIOR MARINE, EXELLENT HEALTH, needs live on property (mother-in-law or ?) want rural area within 10 miles of stores, etc, great references, Jim (775)3155191 AMANA ELECTRIC DRYER, MOD.#NED5240 $150; Remington Rand Wood 4 drawer file cabinet $35; Friends of NRA sponsor sculptures, Teddy Roosevelt, George Washington $65 each; 2001 Ford Expedition Eddy Bauer package third row seat $60; Mag Wheels, Superior Automotive/Superior Industries, 3 each, 5”x 5 1/2” (bolt pattern) x 8” wide x 15” diameter, 32”x11.5Rx15” M&S tires $60, Gardnerville Ranchos (530)306-4432
HELP WANTED! Visit sierrascoop.com/jobs
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor” An Easter Prayer
God, give us eyes to see the beauty of the Spring, And to behold Your majesty in every living thing - And may we see in lacy leaves and every budding flower The Hand that rules the universe with gentleness and power - And may this Easter grandeur that Spring lavishly imparts Awaken faded flowers of faith lying dormant in our hearts, And give us ears to hear, dear God, the Springtime song of birds With messages more meaningful than man’s often empty words Telling harried human beings who are lost in dark despair - Be like us and do not worry for God has you in His care. (Helen Rice) CASH PAID FOR OLD COSTUME JEWELRY: All types including Silver, Copper, Rhinestones, Old Plastics, Glass, Pot Metal, Pins, Bracelets, Rings, Necklaces, Old Watches, Lockets, larger quantities preferred, please leave clear message on home phone, I call everyone back, Joanne (775)465-9422 PORSCHES WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE! OLD Porsches 1950 to 1973, looking for a Porsche 356, 911 or 912, running or not, with or without engine or transmission, also interested in parts. Will pay cash! Have trailer will travel (775)291-6827 HOT TUB SERVICE AND REPAIR, WEEKLY and bi weekly service, reasonable rates, private homes and vacation rentals, call Tahoe Sierra Hot Tubs (775)2672490 Writing the Editor - We welcome all articles, letters, jokes and comments on Sierra Scoop, local issues, community news and free private party ads, published as space provides. These articles, letters, comments do not necessarily reflect our opinion. All public input is welcome. sierrascoop@charter.net, (775)782-4520 PAINTING INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR, STAINING, faux and fine finishes, free estimates, Powers Painting, NV#68615, powerspainting.org or (775)7815531 or (775)315-5179 GE STAINLESS STEEL SIDE BY SIDE REFRIGERATOR, excellent condition $750; Black and Decker toaster over $50 775-297-3123 MASTER HOROLOGIST, CLOCK REPAIR, MUSEUM Quality Furniture, Chair Caning and Antique Everything Restoration, Grandfather Clock House Calls! A-1 Restorations since 1967, Larry (775)781-1616 ALUMINUM FISHING BOAT 12’ GREGOR AND Sea King trailer, 5HP Honda Motor, Eagle Fish Finder, Downrigger, many extras $1,500 (775)219-9790
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“The Paper With A Hometown Flavor”
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