Self-Care Wellness Wheel

This resource does not replace professional medical or mental health support. Nothing in this resource is to be construed as medical advice or treatment. For all medical questions, please consult a medical professional or treatment facility.

Activity: Write Your Own Mourner’s Kaddish

When someone in the Jewish community dies, we traditionally recite the Mourner’s Kaddish, a prayer in Aramaic — the vernacular language in the 13th Century when it was written . While it is said in memory of someone who has died, the words of the prayer do not actually refer to death; rather, they celebrate and show gratitude for life.

Saying Kaddish can provide much-needed routine and structure in a life that has been upended by loss, and participating in a ritual Jews have been practicing for centuries gives one a feeling of being part of something larger.

1. Read through the English translation of the Mourner’s Kaddish and see which parts of the traditional prayer resonate with you.

2. Use the reflective questions to help you think about the impact the person you have lost had on your life and the ways in which you hope to honor them.

3. Write your own Mourner’s Kaddish in whatever way feels comfortable and authentic for you. You can write in a more traditional prayer format, as a poem, as a journal entry, or anything in between.

4. Think about the ways and times you can say or share your Mourner’s Kaddish. You can share it with your family or religious community. You can recite it during their yahrzeit, when you visit their grave, or in moments when you are thinking about and missing them.

Mourner’s Kaddish in English Translation

Exalted and hallowed be God’s great name in the world which God created, according to plan. May God’s majesty be revealed in the days of our lifetime and the life of all Israel — speedily, imminently, To which we say: Amen.

Blessed be God’s great name to all eternity.

Blessed, praised, honored, exalted, extolled, glorified, adored, and lauded be the name of the Holy Blessed One, beyond all earthly words and songs of blessing, praise, and comfort. To which we say: Amen.

May there be abundant peace from heaven, and life, for us and all Israel. To which we say: Amen.

May the One who creates harmony on high, bring peace to us and to all Israel. To which we say: Amen.

Mourner’s Kaddish Transliteration

Yitgadal v’yitkadash sh’mei raba b’alma di-v’ra chirutei, v’yamlich malchutei b’chayeichon uvyomeichon uvchayei d’chol beit yisrael, ba’agala uvizman kariv, v’im’ru: “amen.”

Y’hei sh’mei raba m’varach l’alam ul’almei almaya.

Yitbarach v’yishtabach, v’yitpa’ar v’yitromam v’yitnaseh, v’yithadar v’yit’aleh v’yit’halal sh’mei d’kud’sha, b’rich hu, l’eila min-kol-birchata v’shirata, tushb’chata v’nechemata da’amiran b’alma, v’im’ru: “amen.”

Y’hei shlama raba min-sh’maya v’chayim aleinu v’al-kol-yisrael, v’im’ru: “amen.”

Oseh shalom bimromav, hu ya’aseh shalom aleinu v’al kol-yisrael, v’imru: “amen.”

רַאָפְתִיְו חַבַתְשִיְו ְרָבְתִי ןֵמָא ורְמִאְו .אָמְלָעְב ןריִמֲאַד אָתָמֱחֶנְו אָתָחְבְשֻת אָתריִשְו אָתָכרִב לָכ

Reflective Questions

Use these reflection questions as you are preparing to write your Mourner’s Kaddish. Let them support you in reflecting on the person you have lost, the impact they had on your life, and how you hope to honor them in their physical absence. We want to acknowledge that you may have had a challenging relationship with the person you lost. Your Mourner’s Kaddish should feel authentic to you and your experience. The questions below may or may not resonate with you.

What are the things you love about the person you lost?

In what ways was this person important in your life and/or in your family?

What was so special about this person to you?

What are the ways you remember them?

How do you honor them in your day-to-day life?

How do you honor them when you are experiencing milestones or big moments in life?

What are the ways you care for yourself in your day-to-day life?

How do you honor yourself, now that they are gone?

What do you want to prioritize in your life moving forward

This resource does not replace professional medical or mental health support. Nothing in this resource is to be construed as medical advice or treatment. For all medical questions, please consult a medical professional or treatment facility.