Shepherd Express - October 2022

OCTOBER 2022

WHAT OVERTURNING ROE V. WADE REALLY MEANS FOR PEOPLE IN WISCONSIN

OCTOBER 2022 | 3

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NEWS 08 What Overturning Roe v. Wade Really Means for People in Wisconsin 12 Equal Access to Milwaukee's Waters 15 This Modern World 16 Trump Wants the Midterms to Be All About Him and They Should Be — Taking Liberties 18 How Much do you Agree with Tim Michels on the Issues? Take the Michels Quiz — Issue of the Month 20 Kai Gardner Mishlove Helps Communities Find their Similarities through Food — Hero of the Month 22 Superintendent Chantell Jewell Seeks Rehabilitation at the House of Correction — MKE SPEAKS: Conversations with Milwaukeeans

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FOOD & DRINK 26 At Café Manna No Meat? No Problem!

29 The Pleasures of Parsley — Flash in the Pan 32 Big Energy at MARN Coffee + Wine — Beverages

SPECIAL SECTION 34 40th Anniversary: Music 34 American Family Amphitheater Vs. Summerfest Main Stage 40 Who Came to Milwaukee in 1982?

42 Remembering Milwaukee's New Music Scene 44 Health & Wellness SPONSORED BY 44 Could Your Gut Be Leaking? — True Health 46 Stop Catastrophizing — Out of My Mind 48 Comprehensive Sex Education is Still Worth Fighting For — SexPress 50 Personal Finance 50 The High Cost of Living and Dying 52 Home & Garden 52 A Home for Every Season — Open House 56 So You Want to Start Canning?

58 Best of Milwaukee

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CULTURE 62 Conjuring a Conversation with Milwaukee's David Seebach 64 This Month in Milwaukee

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LIFESTYLE SPONSORED 68 Madison's Company BY Produces CBD Locally and Organically — Cannabis

HEAR ME OUT

SPONSORED BY

70 Pub Crawls and Pumpkins and ... Oh, My! — Dear Ruthie 72 ‘Ralph Kerwineo and the Refining Influence of Skirts’ — My LGBTQ POV

ART FOR ART'S SAKE 74 From the City that Always Sweeps 6 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

62 Cover: Kathy King, MD, Medical Director, Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin and Allison Linton, MD, MPH, Associate Medical Director for Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin. Photo by Michael Burmesch.

68 PUBLISHER & EDITOR-IN-CHIEF: Louis Fortis (ext. 3802) GENERAL MANAGER: Kevin Gardner (ext. 3825) MANAGING EDITOR: David Luhrssen (ext. 3804) BUSINESS MANAGER: Peggy Debnam (ext. 3832)

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EVENT COORDINATOR: Jan Bruder (ext. 3810) ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES: Bridgette Ard (ext. 3811) Petra Seymore (ext. 3828) Tyler R. Klein (ext. 3815)

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SALES MANAGER: Jackie Butzler (ext. 3814) BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT MANAGER: Chuck Hill (ext. 3822) IN MEMORY OF DUSTI FERGUSON (OCTOBER 18, 1971 – NOVEMBER 20, 2007) WEBMASTER: Barry Houlehen (ext. 3807) DIGTAL STRATEGIST: Allen Halas (ext. 3803) STAFF WRITER & CIRCULATION COORDINATOR: Blaine Schultz (ext. 3813) INTERNS: Ava Elizabeth Carmody Tomasa Lane

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OCTOBER 2022 | 7

NEWS

What Overturning Roe v. Wade Really Means for People in Wisconsin

N

ow that Roe v. Wade has been overturned by the new extreme U.S. Supreme Court majority, the Shepherd Express sat down with two Milwaukee doctors who work for Planned Parenthood and asked them how life has changed for both them and their patients in need of an abortion following the Dobbs decision.

PEOPLE MUST HAVE THE FREEDOM TO MAKE DECISIONS OVER THEIR OWN BODIES KATHY KING, MD, MEDICAL DIRECTOR, PLANNED PARENTHOOD OF WISCONSIN On Friday morning June 24 when the news came down that the Supreme Court had just taken away pregnant people’s right to bodily autonomy, I was at Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin’s Water Street health center with a waiting room full of people from across Wisconsin who had appointments for abortion services.

Suddenly at 9:10 a.m. without the federal protection of Roe, we who care so deeply about being there for our patients, could not be there for them at one of the most pivotal times in their life. I and my staff had to explain to each of them that, even though they had an appointment, we could no longer provide them with the healthcare they needed. There were tears all around, and it was definitely one of the most devastating days of my 25-year career as an OBGYN. That day and each day since has been far worse for Wisconsinites who continue to be denied access to essentially all abortion care in Wisconsin. The extreme criminal abortion ban written 173 years ago makes all abortions a felony unless they are deemed necessary to save a person’s life.

Today, Planned Parenthood affiliates in Wisconsin and Illinois are collaborating to increase access for patients needing to travel to access legal abortion. Me and a team of our medical providers travel to the Planned Parenthood of Illinois health center in Waukegan several days a month to provide 8 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

abortion care. Last week I cared for people from Wisconsin, Indiana, Ohio, and Kentucky - all who were able to overcome enormous barriers to access the healthcare they deserved.

While there are many organizations including PPWI trying to help people access care out of state, we know for some individuals the barriers are insurmountable. Disproportionately Black, Latino and Indigenous people, those with low incomes, and people in rural areas face the greatest barriers to abortion access. Already, people who struggle to make ends meet are often forced to delay abortion services because they need time to secure the funds. They are also less able to take time off from work, secure childcare and access transportation to travel out of state to get the care they need.

IT’S OFTEN MORE COMPLICATED THAN IT MAY APPEAR Each person’s circumstances for seeking abortion care is different and each pregnancy is unique. I can honestly say that some of my greatest teachers have been the patients for whom I provided abortion care. They have taught me to trust that they know their lives, their needs, and hopes for the future better than anyone else. Making decisions about pregnancy is deeply personal and private. In a country that cherishes liberty and freedom I hope we can all agree that people must have the right to make decisions over their own bodies.

What is often lost in the divisive legal and political arguments swirling around the topic of abortion are these individuals’ lived experiences and stories. Some stories are devastating such as the 13-year-old pregnant after a brutal gang rape. Some stories are heartbreaking, such as the 35-year-old whose desired pregnancy is complicated by a lethal fetal anomaly. And

many stories are about the everyday lived experience of those faced with a pregnancy they do not feel they can continue. Over 60% of abortions are performed on people who already have children, so for them it’s about wanting to be the best possible parent to the children they already have.

On the day of the Dobbs decision, I had to deny care to a person whose prior delivery was complicated by a life-threatening uterine rupture. Because of access to timely medical care, she and her baby survived. She was counseled against future pregnancy because the risk would be too great.

When she found out she was again pregnant despite using birth control, she chose abortion as the safest option. Abortion was an option she never contemplated before, but now knew it was the best option to protect her health and her ability to care for her family.

WISCONSIN’S EXTREME 173-YEAR-OLD ABORTION LAW Wisconsin is one of 17 states where abortion is currently inaccessible or severely restricted. In Wisconsin, abortion has been suspended due to the 1849 criminal abortion ban. There is no exception for rape, incest, or risk to physical health. The only exception is to “save the life of the mother” which is ill-defined.

Photo of Kathy King, MD by Michael Burmesch.

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NEWS

A 2021 STUDY CONCLUDED THAT BANNING ABORTION NATIONWIDE WOULD FURTHER INCREASE MATERNAL MORTALITY BY 21% AMONG ALL WOMEN AND 33% FOR BLACK WOMEN. Just prior to the Dobbs decision, one of my colleagues performed an abortion for a 12-year-old girl pregnant due to incest. Under the 173-year-old criminal abortion ban in Wisconsin, my colleague could face criminal felony charges with a prison sentence of 6-15 years for helping a child in trauma.

Most of my medical colleagues would agree that an abortion in this instance is lifesaving, but that does not prevent a prosecutor from disagreeing given the vague wording of the law. There are situations that are not imminently life threatening such as my patient with a history of uterine rupture when an abortion is the safest medical option. Medical decision making should be based on evidence and accepted standards of care and not influenced by punitive laws written by politicians, especially those written 173 years ago.

Health care providers should never be placed in the position of questioning an otherwise sound and scientifically based medical decision for fear they will be criminally prosecuted. I am seeing negative ripple effects in many aspects of early pregnancy care due to fear and misunderstanding of the law.

My patient was denied medication at the pharmacy to treat her miscarriage.

Another patient sought consultation because she was denied care for a second trimester fetal demise. A large hospital system questioned whether it was legal to provide care to someone with a stable ectopic pregnancy. There are ongoing efforts to educate healthcare providers on how to practice in a post-Roe landscape, but the reality is that healthcare is being compromised.

ABORTION BANS DISPROPORTIONATELY HARM PEOPLE OF COLOR Banning abortion is not going to stop abortion—it will only stop safe abortion 10 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

and it will disproportionately impact communities of color and those with low incomes. Forcing people to continue a pregnancy will magnify the pain, distress, injustice and inequity that already burdens their lives.

As a physician committed to the health and safety of my patients, I know the fall of Roe will exacerbate the maternal health crisis in this country. In Wisconsin, Black women are five times more likely to die from a pregnancy-related cause than white women. A 2021 study published in the journal Demography concluded that banning abortion nationwide would further increase maternal mortality by 21% among all women and 33% for black women.

People who have abortions are your friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, church members. They are people we know and care about. They should not be denied the ability to safely access time-sensitive health care.

Me and my colleagues at Planned Parenthood won’t back down, and we won’t stop fighting with everything we've got to be able to provide our patients with the sexual and reproductive health services and information they need to determine the course of their own life.

ABORTION SAVE LIVES ALLISON LINTON, MD, MPH, ASSOCIATE MEDICAL DIRECTOR FOR PLANNED PARENTHOOD OF WISCONSIN I am an OB-GYN who provides abortions. Deciding if or when to become a parent is one of the most personal and life-changing decisions many of us will make.

Abortion save lives. This is not just a phrase on T-shirts and bumper stickers. This is a fact. As one of the few abortion providers in a tertiary care hospital, I have been called in to help patients with pregnancies before viability experiencing sepsis after their water broke too early or a hemorrhage from a placenta trying to detach— many of whom were transferred from hospitals that would not or could not provide the abortion the patient needed. Emergency abortions saved their lives.

I have treated patients with new cancer diagnoses unable to receive treatment while pregnant, with severe heart conditions where continuation of pregnancy would be catastrophic, or with organ dysfunction caused by severely high blood pressure related to pregnancy. Abortions saved their lives.

I have cared for individuals who were being trafficked, were raped or were in abusive relationships where the thought of continuing a pregnancy was leading to thoughts of suicide.

In all these cases, abortions saved their lives.

NO ONE EXPECTS TO HAVE AN ABORTION I have met with thousands of patients seeking abortion services, and not a single one of them expected to be there. Life happens. Circumstances change. Complications arise. You don’t know that you’ll need an abortion until you need an abortion. I assure you— you don’t know what you would do, even if you think you do. While people may have differing views about abortion, most of us can agree that we’d want to be able to make our own medical decisions and to access the health care we need when we need it.

Many of us were not alive or are not old enough to remember what accessing an abortion was like prior to 1973 when Roe v. Wade was decided. Whether you “believe” in abortion or not, the ability to access abortion if you, or a partner, or a friend needs it, has been something many of us have been able to take for granted. But if you talk with doctors who practiced before Roe or read their books and essays, you realize abortion prohibitions didn’t stop abortion, they just made them more dangerous.

Photo of Allison Linton, MD, MPH by Michael Burmesch.

AS DOCTORS WE TAKE AN OATH TO DO NO HARM AND TO DO WHAT IS IN THE BEST INTEREST FOR THE PATIENT. TODAY, WE ARE FORCED INTO THE IMPOSSIBLE POSITION OF TURNING OUR BACKS ON THAT OATH AND OUR PATIENTS.

Entire wards the hospitals were dedicated to individuals who were sick after unsafe abortions. Pregnant patients died regularly from infection and hemorrhage. Their bodies were scarred from desperate attempts to end their pregnancies—stabbing a sharp object into their vagina, or inserting bleach, acid or other corrosive materials that would burn and erode their vaginal tissues. People who do not want to be pregnant will find a way to not be pregnant. Some will be able to afford to travel to a nearby state where a safe abortion is accessible or access medications through international pharmacies. Others will not be so fortunate.

AS DOCTORS WE TAKE AN OATH TO DO NO HARM AND TO DO WHAT IS IN THE BEST INTEREST FOR THE PATIENT. TODAY, WE ARE FORCED INTO THE IMPOSSIBLE POSITION OF TURNING OUR BACKS ON THAT OATH AND OUR PATIENTS. IT ALL DEPENDS ON WHERE YOU LIVE Now that Roe v Wade has been overturned, your ability to access legal abortion depends on what state you happen to live in. Here in Wisconsin, abortion has been suspended due to

a 173-year-old law passed decades before women had a right to vote. This law outlaw's abortion with no exceptions for rape, incest or the health of the pregnant person. It makes abortion a felony with prison sentences of up to six years for doctors. Unless our law is changed, doctors face the threat of criminal prosecution and prison time if prosecutors disagree with the medical determination that an abortion was necessary to save the pregnant patient’s life.

This law was written by politicians who had no medical training and passed during a time before ultrasound and other modern medical technology that can now give us the ability to see what is happening with a pregnancy.

As doctors we take an oath to do no harm and to do what is in the best interest for the patient. Today, we are forced into the impossible position of turning our backs on that oath and our patients. We must wait until a patient is sick enough to intervene with a lifesaving abortion. We are forced to send our patients who have pregnancy complications, victims of violent crimes and those who are simply not ready or able to be a parent over the border to unfamiliar territory, longer wait times and prolonged personal hardship to access the care they need and want.

Although abortion is currently not accessible in Wisconsin, Planned Parenthood and a team of dedicated health care providers are expanding our efforts to ensure that patients in need of abortion services and other

reproductive care get the help they need. Patient navigators from Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin and other affiliates around the country work closely with patients who are forced to travel for essential care to overcome legal, financial, and practical barriers to services. A new partnership between Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin and Planned Parenthood of Illinois has resulted in a dozen Planned Parenthood Wisconsin team members, including physicians, clinicians, registered nurses, and medical assistants traveling to Illinois to support patient care.

I am proud to be a part of this team.

Through this effort, we have doubled the capacity to provide abortion at Planned Parenthood of Illinois’ Waukegan health center, helping to meet the 10-fold increase in patient demand from Wisconsin alone.

The reality is, most of us do not realize just how much these laws and court rulings will have serious consequences for people we love and care about.

My patients are your family members, friends and neighbors ... maybe even you. They deserve to have the ability to make their own decisions and access the health care they need. I will continue to do what I can to protect this access. I ask that you do, too.

Find out more at PPWI.org

OCTOBER 2022 | 11

NEWS

Equal Access to Milwaukee’s Waters GOP LEGISLATION, VETOED BY GOV. EVERS, WOULD HAVE JEOPARDIZED ACCESS TO WATERWAYS AND WATERFRONTS

BY VIRGINIA SMALL Photo courtesy of VISIT Milwaukee.

T

he framers of Wisconsin’s Constitution were intent on keeping waters open for all and enshrined Wisconsin's version of the Public Trust Doctrine within the Constitution. The state’s founding document declares that all navigable waters (wherever it is possible to float a canoe or small boat) are “common highways and forever free,” held in trust by the state for the public good. As part of Wisconsin’s Public Trust Doctrine, when a waterway is filled the resulting land is held in trust and protected by the state, except under unusual circumstances.

Why should people care about the Public Trust Doctrine?

“Most simply, if you care about water, you should care about the Public Trust Doctrine. It is the constitutional right we all have that requires the government to protect water resources,” said Tony Wilkin Gibart, director of Midwest Environmental Advocates, a nonprofit law center.

“Whether your concern for water is rooted in a love for Lake Michigan; a passion for boating, fishing or swimming; or a desire for clean drinking water, the Public Trust Doctrine requires the state to protect your interests. In short, the state cannot simply do nothing; it must actively create and enforce policies that safeguard water for all of us and for future generations.”

The obligations imposed by the Public Trust Doctrine mean that protection of water and public access does not depend solely on political processes—which tend to favor industry groups that can hire lobbyists and make donations to legislators. “Rather, the state is required to protect the

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interests of all Wisconsinites,” said Gibart. “It requires the state to protect everyone's right to access healthy water— not just act on the interests of groups who are wealthy or politically powerful.”

Water equity stands to become even more important.

According to Rhonda Nordstrom, the Water City Program Manager for the nonprofit Milwaukee Water Commons, “As Milwaukee continues to be elevated as a water-rich city, and the Great Lakes region is portrayed as a refuge from climate-change impacts, it will take all of us advocating on behalf of Black, Brown, Indigenous and low-income communities to ensure that we all have access to the gifts of our waters.” MWC works to help “catalyze Milwaukee as a true model Water City … where we all have a stake in the health of our waters and all share in their stewardship and benefits.”

UNDERMINING THE PUBLIC TRUST DOCTRINE Despite this long-established law, the Republican-controlled state legislature passed SB 900 earlier this year, which “would have violated the Public Trust Doctrine by allowing municipalities to redraw the boundaries between public trust land and private property along the Great Lakes,” according to a statement by MEA. According to Gibart, the bill would have affected over 64,000 thousand miles of river shorelines, much of the 800-plus miles of Great Lakes shorelines, and potentially many thousands of miles of shorelines on Wisconsin’s 15,000 inland lakes.”

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NEWS

No Democrats supported SB 900. Governor Tony Evers (D) vetoed it in entirety in April. His veto states the bill would allow municipalities and private landowners to create title over formerly submerged lands in the Great Lakes waters land which the state of Wisconsin currently holds in public trust for the people of Wisconsin. “I object to impinging on the constitutional public trust doctrine under Article IX, Section 1 of the Wisconsin Constitution,” Evers stated in his veto. “This bill would open the door to the whittling away of public land by allowing the transfer of public lands to private entities for private use without a rigorous review process.”

Among the groups who supported SB 900 were the League of Wisconsin Municipalities, NAIOP Wisconsin (a commercial real estate development association), Wisconsin Builders Association, and Wisconsin Realtors Association. According to Wilkin Gibart, “The Wisconsin Realtors Association

represents the interests of companies that make money from buying and selling real estate. If public trust land along Wisconsin’s treasured water bodies could be converted to private property, WRA’s constituencies could profit from the real estate and development projects that would result.

However, the public would lose, forever, its rights to these one-of-a-kind public lands.”

Among those who opposed SB 900 were 13 statewide and local organizations including Milwaukee Riverkeeper, Milwaukee Water Commons and Preserve Our Parks.

Spokespersons for groups opposing the bill expect there will be more attempts to pass similar legislation that could ultimately gut the state’s oversight of public waterfronts and public access to them. Those individuals worry that such legislation would be rubberstamped by a Republican governor.

MILWAUKEE’S RIVERWALK RESPECTS THE PUBLIC TRUST Milwaukee’s Riverwalk is often cited as a model for how civic-minded development can occur alongside public access to waterways. “The [Riverwalk] system is a public-private partnership between riverfront property owners and the City of Milwaukee. In exchange for permanent public access, the City provides financial assistance for the construction of private Riverwalk improvements. Since its inception, property values along the Riverwalk have climbed by more than $1.5 billion,” said a 2022 article in WisPolitics.com.

Photo courtesy of VISIT Milwaukee.

HOW MILWAUKEE GOT —AND KEEPS— ITS EXCEPTIONAL LAKEFRONT People often wonder how Milwaukee managed to keep what appears to be an “unspoiled” waterfront. In fact, nearly all of Milwaukee’s lakefront north of Downtown was created over decades by filling in areas of Lake Michigan. In keeping with the Public Trust Doctrine and specific lakebed grants, these lands may be used solely for public uses.

This intentional effort, first initiated by Milwaukee’s parks commission in the l890s, served multiple civic goals. The filled areas are protective buffers against naturally occurring erosion of bluffs overlooking the lake, which would jeopardize structures built there.

The filled lakebed also created more public land for recreational uses. Today, those varied amenities include public beaches and parks, a marina, a spur of the countywide Oak Leaf trail, campuses for museums and the Summerfest grounds.

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Michael Cain, a retired Madison-based attorney who worked for Wisconsin’s Department of Natural Resources for 34 years, asserted that people wanting to privatize public waterfronts often are unaware of the extraordinary economic and other benefits they provide. “This Riverwalk is an example of a win-win,” said Cain. “The City of Milwaukee worked in cooperation with the DNR to create a Riverfront Comprehensive Plan that would comply with the State Constitution and the Public Trust Doctrine. Today, there are commercial and residential developments on upland adjacent to the river. And the public access along the river has been maintained, consistent with the public trust.”

Gibart said that any legislation similar to SB 900 “would call into question the long-term viability of Milwaukee's Riverwalk because private property owners along the river could argue that they can now use those properties without restrictions. That would affect economic development and revitalization Downtown and in the Third Ward.” He added that such a bill “could also lead to more private development along the shores of Lake Michigan, making the lake less accessible to members of the public.”

Award-winning free-lance journalist Virginia Small often writes about environmental and community issues for the Shepherd Express.

OCTOBER 2022 | 15

NEWS TAKING LIBERTIES

Trump Wants the Midterms to Be All About Him and They Should Be

BY JOEL MCNALLY

W

hether Republican leaders like it or not, Donald Trump intends for November’s midterm elections to be all about him. Trump has always reveled in public attention and this time President Biden and Democrats are happy to give it to him good and hard.

Polls show a growing awareness among voters across the ideological spectrum—liberals, conservatives and independents in the middle—that Trump and the dangerous Republican extremists who support him are actively working to destroy American democracy.

TRUMP HAS PROMISED “FULL PARDONS WITH AN APOLOGY” TO SUPPORTERS CONVICTED FOR THEIR VIOLENT ASSAULT ON CONGRESS TO TRY TO STOP THE CERTIFICATION OF PRESIDENT BIDEN’S ELECTION.

Trump has always exempted himself from laws in his personal life, business practices and presidential actions. He wants his violent supporters to have the same privilege. In Trump’s fantasy world, they were responding to a national emergency on Jan. 6. Republicans and Democrats in Congress and every court in the land including Trump’s own Supreme Court refused to throw out Biden’s election victory.

But Trump also intends to support “law and order” and local police in ways that will make your head spin. He wants to deploy a federal force including the military to crush civil rights protests in racially diverse cities demanding equal treatment by police in Black and white neighborhoods.

It was unfortunate Trump’s insurrectionists seriously injured more than 140 Capitol police by beating them with flagpoles and clubs, but that only happened once. Trump and Republicans claim Democratic city officials create far more problems for police by allowing constant public protests about how police do their jobs. Democrats believe the Constitution protects Americans’ right to protest.

JUST SHOOT THEM? If there are any rational Americans who don’t realize that by now, they can simply take Trump’s word for it. Trump is resuming his hate-filled public rallies campaigning for extreme Republican midterm candidates who have created themselves in his image. They’re election deniers ready to declare Trump president again in 2024 no matter how elections turn out. Democracy schemocracy.

HATE-FILLED CAMPAIGN KICKOFF For Trump, his hate rallies also are the official kickoff of his 2024 presidential campaign. The last thing Republicans need right now is Trump creating more problems for them.

What Republicans expected to be favorable midterms have already been thrown up for grabs by horrible candidates and Trump’s vicious rightwing majority on the Supreme Court. The court abolished Constitutional abortion rights for women that were protected for 50 years alienating women voters and men who care about them.

Trump has always attracted attention by making proposals that delight his extreme supporters while disgusting everyone else. He’s doing it again at the worst possible time for his party. He’s started outlining drastic plans to achieve his wildest dreams in a second presidential term that would create an authoritarian nation bearing little resemblance to our American democracy.

FIRST THINGS FIRST, “FREE THE INSURRECTIONISTS!” Trump has promised “full pardons with an apology” to supporters convicted for their violent assault on Congress to try to stop the certification of President Biden’s election. Let his people go!

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If Trump becomes commander-in-chief again, he intends to stop all that woke liberal nonsense with thousands of troops in city streets. Defense secretary Mark Esper refused Trump’s request to send 10,000 troops to Washington to shut down protests over George Floyd’s murder. Esper said Trump asked him: “Can’t you just shoot them?”

There’s more where that came from. Trump proposes rounding up the homeless in our cities and housing hundreds of thousands, possibly even millions, in tent cities on the outskirts of town so decent people won’t have to look at them.

THE GOOD NEWS IS A GROWING NUMBER OF VOTERS ARE EXPRESSING CONCERNS ABOUT TRUMPED-UP REPUBLICANS DESTROYING CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS THEY ALWAYS THOUGHT WOULD BE PROTECTED IN OUR DEMOCRACY.

“You don’t have time to build buildings,” Trump told the Conservative Political Action Conference in Dallas. “You can do that later, but you have to get the people off the streets ... The only way you’re going to remove the homeless encampments and reclaim our downtowns is to open up large parcels of inexpensive land.”

The National Alliance to End Homelessness estimates there actually are about 580,000 people including families with children who are homeless nationwide. Advocates believe making affordable housing available would be more humane than putting them in tents.

Since Trump was banned from the most popular social media for promoting violence, Americans who avoid watching Trump’s shameless propagandists on Fox News are no longer inundated with Trump’s relentless stream of anger and hatred.

Responsible media have stopped spreading Trump’s lies to gullible people who foolishly believe them because they heard it on the news. Instead, mainstream news organizations continue to expand their coverage of the growing threat to American democracy from Trump and the dangerous forces he has unleashed within the Republican party.

The good news is a growing number of voters are expressing concerns about Trumped-Up Republicans destroying Constitutional rights they always thought would be protected in our democracy. The majority of Americans want their democracy back. All they have to do is keep voting for it until they feel like they’re in America again.

Joel McNally was a critic and columnist for the Milwaukee Journal for 27 years. He has written the weekly Taking Liberties column for the Shepherd Express since 1996.

OCTOBER 2022 | 17

NEWS ISSUE OF THE MONTH

How Much do you Agree with Tim Michels on the Issues?

Take the Michels Quiz IF YOU SCORE SEVEN OR MORE AGREES, THEN VOTE TIM MICHELS FOR GOVERNOR

Since Roe v. Wade has been overturned by the US Supreme Court, Wisconsin is now governed by an 1849 abortion law that outlaws abortion with no exceptions for rape or incest.

Tim Michels says that this 1849 ban is “an exact mirror” of his position.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels said that he is principled and is not going to soften his position on abortion, including his statement that it is “not unreasonable” for the government to force a rape victim to have to give birth.

AGREE

DISAGREE

In 2020 alone, Tim Michels along with his family foundation donated close to $200,000 to anti-abortion groups.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels supports allowing 18 years olds to buy assault style weapons with no cooling off or waiting period.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels opposes any assault style weapons ban similar to the one the U.S. had in effect for 10 years between 1994 and 2004.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels opposes “Red Flag” laws that allow the police, family members or in some cases even a doctor to petition a court to remove someone’s guns if they are a threat to themselves or others.

AGREE

DISAGREE

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On marriage equality, Tim Michels firmly believes that marriage should be between one man and one woman. He said that he would even support a constitutional amendment that only allows marriage between a man and a woman.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels is highly critical of public education and wants to cut public school funding. Public schools have been a fundamental part of American democracy, the avenue for middle- and lower-income children to get to college and participate in the American Dream. Michels sent his children to expensive private prep schools on the East Coast. He said that funding public education is “the definition of insanity.”

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels, when asked about the 2020 election and the illegal efforts to try to decertify that election, his answer was “everything will be on the table” if he becomes governor.

He also promoted the conspiracy theories that “maybe” the 2020 election was stolen and that “Trump would probably be president right now if we had election integrity.”

AGREE

DISAGREE

Regarding the 2024 election, if he were governor, Michels would not commit to respecting the final vote count and insuring that the will of the people would prevail.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels voiced his support for Michael Gableman, the man who wasted over $1 million taxpayer dollars on a sham investigation of the 2020 election and found no irregularities that could have changed the result of the election.

AGREE

DISAGREE

Tim Michels trivialized the January 6 insurrection that left police officers dead as just people showing “frustration over the election results.”

AGREE

DISAGREE

If he becomes Governor, Tim Michels wants to see his company, Michels Corporation continue to get state contracts even though the boss of the individuals awarding the contracts ultimately works for the governor.

AGREE

DISAGREE

ENDORSEMENT UPDATE: Due to early voting and absentee voting, we are going to post the Shepherd Express endorsements the day early voting starts.

On Oct. 25, the endorsements will be listed in our free daily e-newsletter. If you are not receiving this free newsletter, please sign up for it at shepherdexpress.com/newsletter.

Most importantly, PLEASE VOTE, our democracy depends on it.

OCTOBER 2022 | 19

NEWS HERO OF THE MONTH

Kai Gardner Mishlove Helps Communities Find their Similarities through Food

BY ERIN BLOODGOOD

F

ood tells the story of migration, evokes memories, reminds us of where we came from and connects us to the land that produces the food we eat. As Kai Gardner Mishlove so beautifully explains, food unifies us and heals us. “When you prepare a dish, you’re putting your heart and soul into it and you’re evoking the memory of your ancestors in that work,” she says.

Gardner Mishlove reached out to her friend Saehee Chang, the owner of Korea Konnect and Kosari Kimchi, to ask about local restaurants willing to collaborate. That connection led Gardner Mishlove to chefs Gregory Leon of Amilinda, Christie Melby-Gibbons of Tricklebee Café and Caitlin Cullen of Tandem who helped her found Tables Across Borders in 2019.

In 2018, Gardner Mishlove came up with an idea that would merge her love of food, building bridges between people, and supporting the many refugee communities in Milwaukee. She wanted to find a way for refugee chefs to share the food from their culture with others.

Each of the three restaurants would volunteer their time and space to host pop-up dinners featuring chefs from different refugee communities. Gardner Mishlove would organize ticket sales for the events and 100 percent of the proceeds would go to the chefs. Since 2019, the project has hosted 18 dinners and featured chefs from Syria, Ethiopia, Eritrea, Afghanistan, Venezuela, the Rohingya people of Burma, Congolese, and many more. After the pandemic, the restaurant Lazy Susan replaced the Tandem as the third space to host dinners.

Through food, she knew there was a way to “celebrate the diversity amongst us, the beauty of our differences but also the beauty of our commonalities.”

20 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Photo by Erin Bloodgood.

FIGHTING HATE WITH KNOWLEDGE “I thought it was important for people to see refugees as people contributing positively to our community. And I also wanted to connect that to my own experience as a Black woman—as a Jewish woman,” explains Gardner Mishlove.

Her intention has always been to counter the racism, hate and antisemitism that is often directed at refugees—especially after the 2017 ban on predominantly Muslim countries was ordered. Gardner Mishlove credits the bigotry towards these communities to a lack of understanding about their culture. “If we can break down those walls so that people can get to know each other, then it’s harder to hate what you know.”

A PLACE FOR HEALING During the dinners, Gardner Mishlove thinks of her own family’s experience—people who survived the Trans-Atlantic slave trade and the Holocaust. Many of the refugees cooking the food have experienced similar hardship such as genocide in Myanmar or living through the war in Syria.

Thanks to Tables Across Borders, these people from different parts of the world can come together to talk about those experiences and find how they are more alike than they are different.

To learn from one another is to heal. The chefs talk about the spices and ingredients they use and how some of

those ingredients have influence from different countries— countries their ancestors came from. As they eat, participants begin to see—and taste—the story of the migration and resilience.

Tables Across Borders is working on bigger ideas and deciding what comes next for the project. Gardner Mishlove wants to support the refugee chefs in developing the skills they need to establish businesses. That requires assistance with language barriers and the logistics of getting a business license. She says the best way to support the project is to follow them on Facebook and support the small restaurants who make it possible (Amilinda, Tricklebee and Lazy Susan).

Gardner Mishlove believes most hard conversations and disagreements should be held over a plate of food or a good cup of coffee—because who could be mad when you’re sharing a delicious meal?

Learn more about Tables Across Borders on their Facebook page at www.facebook.com/Amilindatandemtricklebee.

Erin Bloodgood is a Milwaukee photographer and storyteller. See more of her work on her website at bloodgoodfoto.com.

OCTOBER 2022 | 21

NEWS MKE SPEAKS: CONVERSATIONS WITH MILWAUKEEANS

Superintendent Chantell Jewell Seeks Rehabilitation at the House of Correction

BY TOM JENZ Photo by Tom Jenz.

D

oes the public know what goes on at the Milwaukee County House of Correction? According to Superintendent Chantell Jewell, “People often have a misperception of what happens here.” In other words, it’s more than incarceration. It’s about rehabilitation.

Located in Franklin, the House of Correction is a city block constructed of cement and steel. Off to one side looms a tall chain link fence with razor wire in place of the old wooden corral next to the friendly farmhouse.

After going through the careful checkin process, I met Jewell in her office, and we settled around a conference table. County Executive David Crowley appointed her to this position in November 2020 after she had served 25 years in the criminal justice system.

Tell me about your early background, your parents, where you grew up and schools you attended. You are a Milwaukee native, right?

I was born and raised in the central city in the Lapham Park low-income housing project on Eighth and Brown, mostly Black residents. I was an only child raised by a single mom. She worked in medical records at Children’s Hospital until she retired.

I also got a lot of guidance from my extended family, my grandmother, aunts and uncles. I attended St. Leo Elemen22 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

tary School on 24th and Locust, then Samuel Morris Middle School for the Gifted and Talented, and then Riverside University High School on Locust.

Graduated in 1989. At 16, I became a teen mother. My mom and grandmother helped me raise my daughter.

Their support allowed me to continue my education. I went to Marquette University for a few years, but I graduated from UW-Milwaukee, majoring in criminal justice. I later got my master’s degree in business administration from Cardinal Stritch University.

Take me through your career path, the various jobs you held and finally how you became the Superintendent of Milwaukee County House of Correction.

Growing up in the inner city, I was aware that the residents really didn’t have a positive perception of law enforcement. I’d hear a lot of people talking about their probation officers.

So many people I knew in the community were tied to the criminal justice system. I figured if I ever went through that system, I’d go through the front door, not the back door. In college, I was attracted to the criminology and psychology courses. I wanted to understand our criminal justice system where a lot of people that looked like me were involved.

Before I graduated from college, I got a job in the State Department of Corrections. I worked full time as a youth

counselor for two years at Ethan Allen Boys School. My job was monitoring young men in a correctional facility who had been adjudicated delinquent, sometimes as many as 50 residents. In 1998, I was promoted as a probation and parole agent in the Milwaukee region. Did that for seven years and managed a very large caseload of people who were on probation/parole for crimes they had committed.

I also became an absconder agent, meaning alone or with a police officer, I’d apprehend criminals who had violated parole.

In 2005, I was promoted to corrections field supervisor in charge of a unit of probation and parole agents. I worked on a lot of diversity initiatives, cochaired the Regional Diversity Committee and the Crime Victims Committee.

I’ve always been concerned about equality, equity and the well-being of people in my community. I still live in the inner city. In 2016, I retired from the State Department of Corrections.

But after you retired, I think you still kept working in your field.

Yes, I took a job as the reentry program manager with EMPLOY Milwaukee because I understood the significance of employment in preventing recidivism.

My job was to integrate Corrections and Workforce, creating non-traditional partnerships to help meet the employment needs of returning justice-involved individuals.

OCTOBER 2022 | 23

NEWS MKE SPEAKS: CONVERSATIONS WITH MILWAUKEEANS

What exactly is Employ Milwaukee?

Employ Milwaukee is the largest Workforce Board in Wisconsin. It is responsible for the coordination, monitoring and development of workforce initiatives in Milwaukee County.

If I was incarcerated at the House of Correction, did my time and got out, and I wanted a job, would I go to Employ Milwaukee to help me with that process?

Yes, that is one place you might go.

Here at the House of Correction, I also have a Workforce Navigator from Employ Milwaukee. These staff members assess the needs of residents and connect them to possible resources to find employment. This usually happens 90 days prior to release. With my experience, I know what support is necessary for a resident to be successful and not re-engage the criminal justice system.

I also have a staff housing navigator from the Department of Health and Human Services to help find housing for a released resident. And I have a mental health case manager. We are trying to address the needs of our residents, whether educational, mental health, or vocational issues. Marquette University enrolled some of our residents through their Educational Preparedness Program and have classes here on site. This is an amazing opportunity. We also have a partnership with Chase Bank. A bank VP educates residents on financial literacy since we know a lot of crimes are motivated by money. Knowledge is power and providing these types of resources will help reduce recidivism. I don’t believe the House of Correction should be a punitive place. Residents have already been punished through their court sentences. Our job is to see that people leave here in a better position than when they came. Ultimately, the overall goal is to create community safety.

At the House of Correction, how long is the average stay for a resident who has committed a crime?

The average stay for those who have been sentenced is 90 to 120 days. For those who have not been sentenced, their stay might be longer. We are opening a family engagement center

24 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

where residents can interact with their children and family in person. Right now, we only have video visits. If you think about it, family members generally have the most influence. When someone is incarcerated, that person’s family members also suffer. Family distress can also be a driver of recidivism or repeat criminal behavior.

Since I became superintendent, I made sure that we don’t describe criminals as “offenders.” We refer to them as residents. The word “offenders” marks them as something they’ve done versus what we hope to see when they rehabilitate. The word “offender” has a negative connotation. It is really all about creating an environment of mutual respect which further promotes safety and security.

Jeff Schwarz is a veteran Milwaukee Public Defender.

He often defends clients on felony charges. He told me, “In Wisconsin, there are two state mental institutions, Mendota in Madison and Winnebago in Oshkosh. If a client is found mentally incompetent or not guilty by reason of mental disease, they have to wait in the local jail until there is an opening in a state institution. The jails are filled with people who are mentally ill, but the state institutions are full. That is unfortunate.” He was referring to county jail on Ninth Street, but you and I are now sitting in your larger building in Franklin.

What is the difference between the two facilities?

The Downtown jail is run by the county sheriff, and our House of Correction is overseen by the county executive, David Crowley, who appointed me. The county jail houses residents with the most serious mental issues. But 60% of our own residents here have a mental health diagnosis, and 18% take medication. We created a resident support unit, a dorm for the residents who struggled in the general population because of mental health conditions.

They are supervised by about 25 correction officers with crisis intervention training. We also have mental health professionals and a case manager assigned to that team.

What would you say is the most challenging part of your job?

Staffing is a major issue. Industry wide, these jobs are not as desirable as they once were. The correction officer’s role is challenging because they are responsible for care, custody and control of our residents. It can be stressful. A correction officer in our facility is responsible for maintaining a safe and secure dormitory full of residents, and that means from 40 on up to 60 people. You may have to respond to medical emergencies, a fight, monitor resident interactions, while also serving as a role model. You are not always being treated the best by the residents that you are trying to help. Another challenge is balancing the perception of what the HOC really is and what was designed for. Incarceration is only one part of the response to community safety. We also have to ensure that we have resources to help rehabilitate residents. Our goal is to create safer communities and create less victims.

What types of crimes are the residents in for?

The common offenses that individuals are sentenced to the HOC include but aren’t limited to domestic violence related offenses, bail jumping, disorderly conduct, possession of a firearm by a felon and battery.

Are there racial disparities in the Correction system?

Yes. People of color are over-represented in the criminal justice system.

Milwaukee County has one of the highest per capita incarceration rates for Black men in the country.

At the time of my visit, the total population in the House of Correction was 664 residents. Ninety percent of residents were male, 10% female. Sixty-five percent were Black, 20% white, 13% Hispanic, 1% Asian and less than 1% American Indian. The youngest residents are 18.

Tom Jenz writes the Central City Stories column for shepherdexpress.com.

OCTOBER 2022 | 25

FOOD & DRINK

GUACAMOLE POTATO SKINS

At Café Manna No Meat? No Problem!

BY SUSAN HARPT GRIMES

T

ypical Wisconsin restaurant stereotypes may conjure images of large portions, heavy on the meat and potatoes, and nary a fresh veggie in sight. Café Manna, in the Brookfield Town Center, turns that tired trope on its head. Since 2008, Café Manna has been serving up fresh, flavorful, and filling dishes that are a celebration for vegans and vegetarians, as well as an unexpected treat for dedicated meat-eaters to discover. The restaurant has received many accolades over the years, including a 3-star certification from the Green Restaurant Association of America. This means they don’t use microwaves or deep fryers, all of their big equipment is energy star rated, recycled or renewable materials were used to furnish the dining room, take-out containers are made from recycled materials and are recyclable themselves, and whenever possible ingredients are sourced locally.

26 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

On a recent visit, the staff was friendly and attentive. There was only limited seating available in an attractive patio area but sitting inside the comfortable sun-dappled dining room filled with golden wood tables and chairs was equally as inviting.

LIMONADE

Begin your meal with a small plate option like the out-of-this-world Guacamole Potato Skins ($15), two large, crispy potato skins filled with rich and creamy guac, topped with fresh salsa, drizzled with a smoky ancho flavored cashew “sour cream” and served on a bed of spinach leaves.

Or try the “Crab” Cakes ($15), two cakes made from a mix of hearts of palm and chickpeas, encrusted with panko crumbs served with a sriracha aioli and cabbage curtido (think spicy fermented slaw).

Photos by Michael Burmesch.

OCTOBER 2022 | 27

FOOD & DRINK

PEACE BOWL A STANDOUT Main course standouts include the Peace Bowl ($19), a generous portion of brown rice and quinoa topped with roasted cauliflower, broccoli, sweet potato, spinach, and bell peppers tossed with a flavorful coconut curry and crunchy cashews. Another great choice is the Spicy Cashew Cauliflower ($18), which features udon noodles topped with sauteed veggies in a ginger cashew sauce and lightly battered baked cauliflower, carrots, celery and edamame tossed in a spicy glaze. These entrees are large enough to satisfy the biggest of appetites or provide you with enough to take home for a second meal.

TU-NO MELT

Café Manna’s menu is rounded out with salads ($17-$18), soups ($8-$10), and sandwiches ($14-$17), which are served with a choice of side salad, fresh fruit, sweet potato wedges, or tasty garlic brussels sprouts. Also, a rotating menu of daily and weekly specials complement their regular menu nicely.

There are a few specialty beverages on offer, of note is the Limonade ($6) made with fresh limes, kale, Swiss chard, ginger, raw sugar and purified water. Or go with the soothing Rich Vegetable Potassium Broth ($6) made from a blend of six root vegetables, celery and parsley. If you’re looking for something less “healthy” a small, but respectable, wine and beer list is also available.

As impossible as it may seem to do while consuming your meal, try to save a little room for dessert, even if it’s to be shared with your dining companions. Café Manna’s desserts are not to be missed. Their signature Café Carrot Cake ($10) is enhanced with chopped macadamia nuts, coconut, and a house-made pineapple jam, and topped by traditional cream cheese frosting (of course!), Or, if you’re too full for more than a bite or two, go for the Chocolacados ($7) two chocolate avocado truffles covered with a chocolate ganache and a touch of fruit coulis sinfully amazing.

CAFÉ MANNA 3815 N Brookfield Road (262) 790-2340 cafemanna.com Handicap accessible: Yes $$-$$$

Susan Harpt Grimes is a veteran food and features writer for the Shepherd Express.

28 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Photos by Michael Burmesch.

THE PLEASURES OF PARSLEY

BY ARI LEVAUX

C

urly parsley is widely scorned by the culinary elite.

Aspiring chefs absorb this disdain from a young age, and quickly understand that getting ahead in this game requires committing instead to the flat-leafed version, also called Italian parsley. But in my parsley potato salad recipe, curly parsley does the heavy lifting.

“Curly is underrated,” he said with the fervor of a salesman. “Chefs all prefer flat leaf. It’s wonderful, but so is curly.

Unfortunately, curly’s role as a garnish at low-end chain restaurants gave it an undeserved bad name. Old curly parsley on plates of bad late-night food is not the same as a sprig from your garden.”

Typecast as a garnish, curly parsley struggles to find any other purpose on the plate. It is admittedly tougher than flat, which means you must work harder to extract the flavor.

And while some eaters value an abundance of fiber in their diets, others will make a case for vegetables which lack the consistency of steel wool. Curly parsley can also be harder to clean, and the stems can curl over to make trimming them more of a chore.

My friend obviously dined at a different level than the establishments frequented by my parents and me. Poor guy probably never made it to the other mid-level comfort food powerhouses we used to visit, where the bread arrived warm and the parsley was fresh.

Nonetheless, I have a soft spot in my heart for curly parsley because it was my first parsley. As a kid, I associated a solitary sprig of this crinkled leaf with dining out, which was one of my favorite activities. I could always count on that piece of parsley waiting on the edge of my plate. After dispatching the main event I would turn my attention to the parsley.

Its chewy texture and herbal flavor was always a wonderful way to finish the meal.

Elsewhere on the menu during that era, parsley was nowhere to be found. But those were different times. Mediterranean specialty items like pesto, aioli and flat leafed Italian parsley hadn’t yet made the scene. The 98-percenters of America didn’t yet have the freedom to be food snobs the way we do now.

But now that we have choices, and the freedom to diss curly parsley, I figured I should re-evaluate my position on the subject. I reached out to a farmer friend to ask if nostalgia is the only reason to keep using it.

Parsley photo by scisettialfio/Getty Images.

In her garden, my wife grows both flat and curly parsley.

Each summer they go to seed, at which point the leaves shrink back and the plant makes babies. Some of the seeds will sprout in the cool wetness of fall, and overwinter. Some seeds will wait until spring before sprouting. “I haven’t planted parsley in five years,” she says. They are both criminally easy to grow, she says, though curly parsley is slower to bolt in summer.

At the table, she says, they both have their place. Curly parsley has more body, which is nice in a thick salad, like a summer tabbouleh. In leafy salads, the shape of curly parsley can grab onto dressing and wrap itself in flavor.

My curly parsley potato salad makes the most of the three dimensionality of curly parsley. Tossed with warm potatoes, the sturdy herb wilts but doesn’t fold, filling out the dish with its bulky flavor. This recipe includes several of my favorite techniques, including how to make insanely puffy oven potatoes, and for making my famous lemon chicken, which is a highly recommended non-vegetarian option. So basically, this parsley potato salad is three recipes in one.

OCTOBER 2022 | 29

FOOD & DRINK FLASH IN THE PAN

BARELY WILTED PARSLEY POTATO SALAD This warm, hearty salad combines many of the first crops of spring. It readily accepts proteins such as crumbled bacon or browned ground meat. But chunks of lemon chicken are my favorite.

Serves 4 • 1 tablespoon baking soda • 1 tablespoon salt • 1 pound potatoes, cut into large dices • 2 large carrots, cut into pieces of similar size to the potatoes • 1 teaspoon black pepper • 1 tablespoon red pepper flakes • ½ cup olive oil • 1 medium onion, minced • 1 lemon, juiced and zested • ½ cup grated Romano cheese • 1 clove garlic, pressed • 1 large bunch of curly parsley, stems minced and leaves chopped • Recommended condiment: mayo • Non-Vegetarian Alternatives: bacon bits, or chunks of baked lemon chicken, recipe below Add the baking soda and salt to a pot with 8 quarts of water and bring to a boil. Add the potatoes and carrots and boil for 15 minutes. Drain the potatoes and carrots and spread them on a baking pan with four tablespoons of olive oil and the black pepper and red pepper flakes. Bake at 400 for about 30 minutes, or until the potatoes are a perfectly golden shade of crisp. Remove and let them cool.

If you’re including the lemon chicken, you can start the marinade while the potatoes are boiling and bake the chicken at the same time that you bake the potatoes.

While the potatoes and chicken, if using, are baking, add the garlic, onions, lemon juice, zest, cheese and the final four tablespoons of olive oil to a mixing bowl, and stir together.

Add the potatoes and carrots and protein, if using to the mixing bowl, hot out of the pan. Stir it together. Season with salt and pepper. Stir in the parsley and serve.

LEMON CHICKEN • 1 pound chicken breast, cubed • Stems from your bunch of parsley, minced • 1 lemon, juiced and zested • 1 teaspoon salt • 1 teaspoon black pepper • 2 cloves garlic, minced • 2 tablespoons olive oil Add all of the ingredients to a bowl and thoroughly mix. Let marinate about 30 minutes. Transfer to a baking dish and spread evenly. Bake for 15 minutes at 400, or until they start turning golden.

Ari LeVaux has written about food for The Atlantic Online, Outside Online and Alternet.

30 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Potato salad photo by Ari LeVaux. Lemon/leaves photos by Inna Tarasenko/Getty Images.

OCTOBER 2022 | 31

FOOD & DRINK BEVERAGES

Photos by Michael Burmesch.

Big Energy at MARN Coffee + Wine

BY GAETANO MARANGELLI

I

n the Nā Pali Kona Forest Reserve, along the side of Mount Waialeale on the island of Kaua‘i, Susan and I emerged into an extraordinary energy. The rocky and muddy path up Waialeale led us into shrouds of clouds and bursts of rain. It was beautiful. It was challenging.

The peak of Waialeale is on the southeast ridge of an extinct caldera—a large cauldron-like hollow occupying an empty chamber of magma which erupted through the earth as a volcano. The caldera is now a plateau called the Alakai Swamp, a swamp where swamps aren’t—by the ridge of a mountain, four-thousand feet above the sea. When we emerged into the swamp, nobody else was there. We felt its energy moving through us. It was as peaceful as you could possibly imagine, and it was pulsing magnetically. The night was approaching. We didn’t want to leave the place.

Every place—every park and garden, every apartment and house, every restaurant, bar and café—has its own energy.

A vibe. An aura. Some flipping thing created by or through or because of what and who occupies the place. What’s truly extraordinary about MARN Art + Culture Hub (191 N. Broadway) is its energy.

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MARN features a gallery and marketplace, but its Third Ward neighborhood may be known just as well for its café, which is called Coffee + Wine by Interval. As you emerge into MARN, its café meets you with a two-dimensional style of design, making you feel as if you're jumping into the pages of a graphic novel, a story about a cocktail of coffee and craft, art and wine. “Just as Interval is a space for our neighborhood to get together over coffee and food, MARN is a space for artists and arts appreciators to meet and share ideas,” says Mal Montoya, President of MARN, the Milwaukee Artist Resource Network.

The owner of Coffee + Wine by Interval is Ryan Hoban, who purveys and roasts his own coffee from top quality small growers around the world. Ryan also owns rich experience as a coffee brewer, replete with national awards for his espresso and cold brew, as well as a debut café at 1600 N. Jackson St. (His third café is coming up at 2266 S. Kinnickinnic Ave. in Bay View.)

Ryan also curates Interval’s exciting list of natural wines.

These are wines made with honest agriculture and oenology. They aren’t made with herbicides and pesticides, inoculated with factory yeasts or manipulated with chemi-

cal additives. These wines are fully alive. “We found our lane in natural wine through our relationship with coffee,” says Ryan. “Small producers, low intervention feels very similar to the way we select coffees from growers around the world.

Honestly, the vibes from small coffee growers and natural wine makers seem very similar.”

Mal Montoya, President of MARN, on the right and Ryan Hoban, owner of Interval, on the left.

Photo courtesy of MARN.

All of which speaks for the energy of MARN Art + Culture Hub and Coffee + Wine by Interval. “Every month brings new art to our gallery walls, new handmade items to our Marketplace and new menu items to the café,” says Mal. “The best part of all of this is that artists get paid for their work here, as MARN takes a below-industry-standard commission on all art sold here and proceeds from each cup of coffee or glass of wine eventually make their way back to Milwaukee’s arts ecosystem. In short, you may just be visiting for a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, but in doing so you are investing in keeping artists and their creativity in Milwaukee.”

Come for the coffee. Come for the wine. Come for the art.

Stay for the energy.

Gaetano Marangelli is a sommelier and playwright. He was the managing director of a wine import and distribution company in New York and beverage director for restaurants and retailers in New York and Chicago before moving to Wauwatosa.

Photo by Michael Burmesch.

OCTOBER 2022 | 33

SPECIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY: MUSIC

AMERICAN FAMILY AMPHITHEATER VS. SUMMERFEST MAIN STAGE

BY BLAINE SCHULTZ

ABOVE: AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE AMPHITHEATER - 2021

SUMMERFEST MAIN STAGE - 1983

34 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

S

ince Summerfest moved to the lakefront in 1970, the festival’s largest stage has had quite a history. From old Main Stage to the corporate-branded amphitheater-era at the south end of the grounds, the marquee venue has been an attraction.

Known as the Marcus Amphitheater when it was built in 1987, the venue is

currently branded as American Family Amphitheater. A stop for major tours even when Summerfest isn’t happening, the stage has hosted the world’s top performers including The Rolling Stones, Paul McCartney, The Beach Boys, Prince, Bruno Mars, Lady Gaga, Whitney Houston, Tom Petty, Metallica, Pearl Jam and The Eagles.

LEFT: American Family Insurance Amphitheater photo by JMKE Photography. All photos courtesy of Summerfest.

In 2003 Neil Young played the Marcus, debuting his rock opera Greendale, playing the new album front to back.

For many longtime fans it went over like a lead zeppelin, with concertgoers approaching the stage to flip Young the bird before leaving the show. The faithful who stuck it out were rewarded with two encores of blistering classics.

OCTOBER 2022 | 35

SPECIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY: MUSIC

Photo courtesy of Summerfest.

On July 30, 2021, Foo Fighters played the inaugural show ushering in the American Family Insurance Amphitheater era. Back in 1974 Santana played the first of a dozen headlining shows.

Carlos Santana was scheduled to play the amphitheater in July but canceled due to health issues. That show, with Earth, Wind & Fire, has been re-scheduled for July 7, 2024.

LOCAL ACTS HIT BIG But local acts? Well, Steve Miller has Milwaukee roots, and the bandleader was no stranger to the Marcus. Violent Femmes have played the amphitheater several times, including a memorable bill in 1989 with PIL, The Sugarcubes and New Order. Likewise, BoDeans have been familiar faces, paired with the likes of Roger McGuinn, Bruce Hornsby and Little Big Town. In fact, back in 1986 an all-Milwaukee lineup of BoDeans, Violent Femmes and R&B Cadets shared the Summerfest Main Stage.

36 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Photo by Gary Dineen.

BODEANS, VIOLENT FEMMES AND R&B CADETS SUMMERFEST MAIN STAGE 1986

OCTOBER 2022 | 37

SPECIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY: MUSIC

Photo courtesy of Summerfest.

Playing the big stage with a full band, drummer and amplifiers is one thing.

But try pulling it off as a duo?

In 1989, Paul Cebar’s phone number was in Summerfest booking chief Bob Babisch’s rolodex. Cebar was asked to open for Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers at the Marcus Amphitheater. “For quite a few years we were in the last-minute fill-in file on the desk of Bob Babisch,” Cebar said.

As best he can recall, signals were crossed regarding whether Petty was carrying support or playing an “evening with” type show. So Cebar was duly recruited.

“They wanted a minimal set up prior to the headliner and Bob asked if I could pull off a duo for which I drafted

38 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

(guitarist) Peter Roller who was playing in my band (The Milwaukeeans) at the time.” Cebar recalls very little about their set but confirmed “from where we stood was Martian in its complexity.”

Cebar remembers exchanging a few nods with a couple of the band members but had to leave shortly after to either play somewhere else on the grounds or in town somewhere, “never getting to meet Tom or the fellows.

I’d been hoping to have a chance to talk with Howie Epstein about his time spent in my father’s classroom at the Fox Point-Bayside Schools.”

Blaine Schultz is a veteran Milwaukee musician and Staff Writer for the Shepherd Express.

OCTOBER 2022 | 39

SPECIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY: MUSIC

WHO CAME TO MILWAUKEE IN 1982?!

BY SUSAN HARPT GRIMES

Photo by ipopba/Getty Images.

T

here have been a lot of changes to Milwaukee’s concert scene these past 40 years. The venues, the acts, and the ways in which we purchase increasingly expensive tickets have changed significantly. Back then, if you wanted to see a big name band, you’d probably have trekked to the MECCA arena, County Stadium, or Alpine Valley box office, and tickets would have run you $10-$15. In ‘82, Ticketmaster was in its infancy and primarily operated on the West coast.

Imagine no internet yet, so if you wanted to get tickets to see your favorite band in Milwaukee, you’d have to purchase them directly: calling or in person to purchase—and for diehard fans trying for front seats, that may have included camping out on the sidewalk.

Yet, all of that only happened if the big-name acts were willing to consider a Milwaukee stop on their tour. Former DJ for the now defunct 93 WQFM, Tim U’ren, better known in those days as “The Rock and Roll Animal,” took the casual snubs from so many bands personally. He staged a sit-in to protest when The Who skipped Milwaukee on their 1982

40 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

“Farewell” tour. This particular sit-in notably took place on a ledge, 21 stories above Wisconsin avenue, just outside the WQFM offices. He stayed on that ledge for two weeks, broadcasting his show nightly. The story started small, but eventually it was picked up nationally. The Who’s Roger Daltrey called the station to tell U’ren that they had heard about his stunt, and were so touched by his efforts that they were, in fact, adding a tour stop in Milwaukee. The concert took place on Dec. 7, 1982, at MECCA. Of course, it turned out that this was not to be The Who’s last tour, and they’ve been back to Milwaukee more than once since then.

WORLD SERIES OF ROCK Other standout concerts that took place in 1982 read like a Who’s Who of classic rock, including the World Series of Rock II tour which took place at County Stadium on May 28.

The lineup boasted bands like Loverboy, Triumph, .38 Special and Foreigner. The MECCA arena hosted rock legends throughout the year like Van Halen, Rush, ZZ Top and the aforementioned The Who. Alpine Valley welcomed groups like Cheap Trick, Fleetwood Mac, Elvis Costello and Black

Photo by Michael Burmesch.

Sabbath. Summerfest, ran for 12 days in 1982 and featured performances from the Steve Miller Band, Chicago, Santana, George Thorogood & the Destroyers, The Charlie Daniels Band and early rock & roll pioneers Chubby Checker and Carl Perkins.

These days, Milwaukeeans have so many more choices for large venue concerts. We’re not overlooked when the likes of Elton John, Harry Styles, or someday Beyonce (fingers crossed—anyone for a ledge sit-in?), plan their tours.

Summerfest with the recently renovated American Family Amphitheater, Fiserv Forum and American Family Field can all hold large enough crowds to make it tempting for more top-notch performers to visit Milwaukee. Of course, today, we need to be prepared for “ticket sticker shock” where post-lockdown concert tickets can command $100 for average seats. Tickets are almost exclusively sold online or via apps, and if you really want that paper ticket for your collection, it’s going to cost you extra—if you can get one at all. It’s definitely a different concert landscape than it was back in 1982. Ultimately, if the pandemic taught us anything about the opportunity to see live music, it’s to go to concerts whenever you are able because as the well-spoken Henry Rollins once said, “Live music is the cure for what ails ya.”

606 West Wisconsin Avenue - Home of the former 93 WQFM offices.

Susan Harpt Grimes is a Milwaukee writer and long-time contributor to the Shepherd Express.

OCTOBER 2022 | 41

SPECIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY: MUSIC

VIOLENT FEMMES Photo courtesy of Reprise Records.

REMEMBERING MILWAUKEE’S NEW MUSIC SCENE

BY DAVID LUHRSSEN WITH BLAINE SCHULTZ

42 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

I

n the summer of 1981, The Violent Femmes were “discovered” by The Pretenders, who were playing next door at the Oriental Theater that night. Reminding the U.K. band of the buskers on London streets, they spontaneously added the trio to their concert as an unannounced opening act.

The unanticipated gig didn’t have an immediate result beyond a great story to tell, but that story initiated a chain of events that led the Femmes to a contract with Slash Records. But their debut album wasn’t released until 1983.

In 1982 they continued to play city streets or nonconventional-for-rock venues such as the openminded Jazz Gallery, where a young Paul Cebar often performed.

1982 did see the release of debut albums by several Milwaukee “new music” acts, including Those X-Cleavers, Einstein’s Riceboys and, memorably, the LP on Thermidor Records by Oil Tasters, the guitar-less, saxophone-powered trio guided by the genius of Richard LaValliere. Anything cool and local found airplay on WMSE, whose 91.7 FM signal reached citywide only the year before. Many newer groups such as Couch Flambeau, The Deleriants, Tense Experts and The Shemps debuted with inexpensive cassette albums. Vinyl 45s were also relatively inexpensive. 1982 saw local releases by punk rock bands such as The Dominoes and The Prosecutors (early home to Kevn Kinney), the roots-rock Red Ball Jets and Plasticland, whose visionary neo-psychedelia would be praised by artists as diverse as Prince and R.E.M. The summer of 1982 saw the closing of The Starship, Downtown Milwaukee’s hub for all things punk and post-punk. The hardcore punk elements from that scene found refuge in rented bars and halls such as Irene J’s, Top of the Hill, Lincoln Arcade and the Crystal Palace. Top bands from that subculture included The Crusties, Sacred Order and Die Kreuzen, who gained international respect by the end of the ‘80s as their sound evolved.

Bands from the always diverse Milwaukee rock culture found work at large establishments such as Century Hall and The Palms and rock clubs including The Toad and Teddy’s.

October 16, 1982, saw the Crazy Shepherd’s Celebrity Ball at UW-Milwaukee’s Fireside Lounge with Oil Tasters, The Prosecutors and The Essentials, whose leader Pat MacDonald would find success with Timbuk 3—the band named by Milwaukee songwriter Jim Spencer.

David Luhrssen cofounded The Express with Kevn Kinney and is now Managing Editor of the Shepherd Express.

Blaine Schultz is a longtime Milwaukee musician and Staff Writer for Shepherd Express.

Cassettes photo by nautiluz56/Getty Images.

OCTOBER 2022 | 43

SPECIAL HEALTH & WELLNESS TRUE HEALTH | SPONSORED BY TRINERGY HEALTH

Could Your Gut Be Leaking?

GUT HEALTH PART 2

BY KATHERINE BAYLISS, MD

Illustration by Michael Burmesch.

H

aving provided an overview of gut health in July’s True Health column, let’s now dive into what can go awry and what we can do about it.

As noted in Gut Health Part I, the GI tract is like a hollow tube going through our body with an opening on either end.

When accounting for numerous folds, this hollow space (gut lumen) is actually the largest interface we have with the external environment. The integrity of the gut lining is critical for providing a protective barrier while allowing nourishment—-keeping the “bad” out and allowing the “good” in.

What occurs when the gut barrier function is compromised?

Sometimes referred to as “leaky gut,” the GI track becomes like a sieve—overly porous or permeable.

Here’s how it happens. Any of several triggers damage or inflame the cells lining your gut. Triggers may include: micro-

44 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

biome imbalances (dysbiosis), unhealthy foods, medications, stress, toxins or infections. After many weeks of insult, large molecules that were once kept in the GI tract get through.

For example, an inflammatory molecule that tends to “leak” is lipopolysaccharide (LPS—also known as endotoxin) derived from broken down bacteria in the gut. Once LPS gains access to your blood circulation, it can “shower” your body causing low grade, system-wide inflammation.

Overly large molecules derived from under digested food can also get though. Your immune system, constantly surveilling the gut border, sees these large molecules as invaders and may develop antibodies against them. This starts a vicious cycle of food sensitivities which feed into increased gut permeability and can also cause inflammation in other areas of your body. If you are genetically susceptible, this process can contribute to development of autoim-

mune disorders such as rheumatoid arthritis and thyroiditis.

Increased gut permeability has been linked to several health issues including weight gain, migraine headaches, fibromyalgia, mental health issues (depression and anxiety) and several skin conditions to name a few.

SYMPTOMS AND CLUES How do we diagnose leaky gut? Often it is based on a constellation of symptoms and findings. The quality of your stool can provide insight, yet many of us don’t know what constitutes “normal.” After all, it’s not a topic that comes up over cocktails, right? So, a “perfect poop” is medium brown, formed but soft, relatively clean (minor soiling of toilet paper) and occurs with relative ease at least once a day. You should feel like you “evacuate.” There are also some tests that can be helpful. Stool testing can identify stealth infections while providing clues on microbiome balance and digestive health. A breath test can be used to assess for small intestine bacterial overgrowth (SIBO). Elevated inflammatory markers on blood testing may also suggest gut health issues.

So how might you suspect you have suboptimal gut health?

Here are some clues: • Bloating, diarrhea or constipation • Heartburn • Inflammatory skin conditions • Allergies • Headaches • Autoimmune disorder • Mood disturbance • Medications (antacids, NSAIDs, antibiotics) • Do you get “puffy”—especially after eating?

What do we do about it? In Functional Medicine, we talk about the 5 R’s.

• Remove (offending agents like certain foods or unfavorable organisms) • Replace (digestive enzymes) • Reinoculate (probiotics and prebiotics) • Repair (support gut cell lining and immune system) • Rebalance (whole body health and lifestyle factors— very importantly consider diet).

Healing your gut takes a personalized approach and can take time. While this process can be challenging, the impact on your overall health is worth it and hopefully some changes take root as lifelong healthy habits.

Send your questions or indicate topics of interest to bayliss@shepex.com.

Katherine Bayliss, MD, a Milwaukee native, practiced in conventional medicine as a pathologist for 25 years. She now lives her passion, helping others through the more holistic Functional Medicine model.

OCTOBER 2022 | 45

SPECIAL HEALTH & WELLNESS OUT OF MY MIND | SPONSORED BY TRINERGY HEALTH

Stop Catastrophizing HOW TO QUIET TEMPESTS IN TEAPOTS

D

BY PHILIP CHARD

oes my headache mean I have a brain tumor? Is my manager’s dour expression an indication I’m about to be fired? If my toddler punches his stuffed animal, is he a sociopath in the making? Does that rattling sound from the airplane mean we’re about to plunge to our deaths? If my love interest doesn’t respond to my text right away, are we on the outs? Do geopolitical events mean we are all doomed?

Most of us do our measure of “what if?” worrying but, for some, this mental nail biting rapidly escalates into catastrophizing. Believing that bad things will happen and that the consequences will prove catastrophic is more than garden variety worrying. Research shows this mindset wreaks havoc on one’s well-being and proves disabling for some folks, interfering with their capacity to lead a so-called normal life (should such a thing exist). As examples, this tendency plays a central role in phobias, psychosomatic conditions,

46 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

PTSD and anxiety disorders. What’s more, when those with chronic pain catastrophize, their symptoms worsen, it is one example of how negative emotions undermine both physical and mental wellness.

David proved a case in point. From his teens on, he suffered from health anxiety, frequently worrying that normal aches and pains were harbingers of far worse things to come.

However, it wasn’t until adulthood that his catastrophizing kicked in big time, creating a vicious cycle. First, he would notice something physically amiss, then grow anxious and, subsequently, interpret the anxiety symptoms themselves as further proof of a medical crisis in the making. The more anxious he became, the more his symptoms escalated and fueled further worry. Many of these folks end up in the ER convinced they are having a heart attack or some other medical emergency.

Illustration by Michael Burmesch.

PRONE TO WORRY? So, why do some of us catastrophize while others don’t?

Well, if you have a personality trait called “neuroticism,” you’re at greater risk. Those with this tendency, which is partly genetic, are more prone to worry, moodiness, irritability, emotional reactivity and the like. However, even those without neuroticism can fall prey, particularly in today’s media saturated and troubled world. Some studies show high consumption of bad news (think “doom scrolling”) can lead to catastrophizing in just about anybody. The same holds true for folks who turn to the internet to explore worrisome physical symptoms, especially if they seek out anecdotal accounts and opinions rather than science-based ones.

The key to modifying catastrophic thinking is … well, thinking, but differently. It’s not easy to do while descending one of those cognitive rabbit holes but pausing to reflect on one’s self-talk is a vital first step. Basically, just listen to what you’re telling yourself, as well as the emotional tone of your inner speech. If you’re using lots of universal qualifiers—never, always, totally, absolutely, etc.—that’s a clear indication catastrophizing is nearby. If we can, it’s best to shift to observer mode. How? Sharing one’s thoughts with a trusted confidant can help if that person lends a more nuanced perspective. Absent that, pause to consider what that individual would tell you if they were present. Finally, remind yourself that humans are abysmal at predicting the future, so whatever we are treating as predictive fact is usually mere conjecture.

There are also non-cognitive approaches. For example, changing one’s physical experience can facilitate a shift in mindset. Go outside. Take a walk. Splash cold water on your face. Listen to music. Drop and do twenty. These are all ways to “lose your mind and come to your senses,” because one’s mind is not being helpful.

Also, recognize that doom scrolling and negative news saturation increase the chances you’ll go catastrophic about something in your personal realm. They prime the mental pump and not in a good way. Once I’ve grown anxious about the state of the world, my apprehension over what’s closer to home often becomes exaggerated.

Obviously, real catastrophes happen. There’s no shortage of tragedies in our world and any of us can fall victim to one, sometimes with no warning. But repeatedly catastrophizing about what might happen and usually does not can become a catastrophe in its own right.

For more, visit philipchard.com.

Philip Chard is a psychotherapist and author with a focus on lasting behavior change, emotional healing and adaptation to health challenges.

OCTOBER 2022 | 47

SPECIAL HEALTH & WELLNESS SEXPRESS | SPONSORED BY TRINERGY HEALTH

COMPREHENSIVE SEX EDUCATION IS STILL WORTH FIGHTING FOR

BY HUDSON NUMMERDOR

I

t has been one year since my initial Sexpress column. Since then, there have been drastic changes in the sexual health landscape of the U.S., with abortion access being decimated in many parts of the country, the introduction of numerous anti-LGBTQ laws, and calls for libraries to remove books containing content about sexuality or gender identity.

While efforts like these are pernicious and frightening in today’s polarized political landscape, they are certainly not new. Like they have done since the

1980s, regressive activists and politicians have chosen to wage culture war battles around sexuality, and many of those battles have played out in the arena of the K-12 public school system.

Even though there is widespread public support across the political spectrum for comprehensive sex ed in public schools, CSE (Comprehensive Sex Education) has long been under attack from forces that aim to promote “Abstinence Only Until [heterosexual] Marriage” (AOUM) programs. A 2017 article in the Journal of Adolescent Health notes that, “[t]he weight of scientific evidence finds that AOUM programs are not effective in delaying initiation of sexual intercourse or changing other sexual risk behaviors.” The authors further find that “AOUM programs threaten fundamental human rights to health, information, and life,” concluding that they “are inherently coercive, withholding information needed to make informed choices and promoting questionable, inaccurate, and stigmatizing opinions.” Such programs are often neglectful, if not harmful, to LGBTQ students, sexually active, pregnant, and parenting adolescents, and survivors of sexual assault.

On the other hand, CSE programs have been shown to offer positive

48 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

outcomes—not just in delaying sexual activity and lowering STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection) incidence, but also in building child sex abuse prevention skills, reducing intimate partner violence, improving skills that support healthy relationships, and decreasing homophobia and bullying. Like most subjects, CSE programs are most effective when started at younger ages with basic concepts and then scaffolded to build on learning as youth grow older. That’s how we learn math and science; sex ed works much the same way.

Despite public support and evidence of CSE’s benefits, opponents continue to spread misinformation and outright lies about the goals and outcomes of CSE. Recent tactics have preyed on parental fears about child abuse while peddling unabashed prejudice against LGBTQ people. Florida’s 2022 “Don’t Say Gay” bill is a prime example of this strategy. The bill prohibits “instruction… on sexual orientation or gender identity… in kindergarten through grade 3 or in a manner that is not age-appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students.” Florida’s governor claimed the bill would prevent “sexualizing kids in kindergarten,” and his spokesperson stated that anyone who was against the bill is “probably a Photo by Umida Kamalova/Getty Images.

groomer.” (For those not familiar with the term, “grooming” refers to acts of establishing an emotional connection with a child to prepare the child for sexual abuse.)

FEAR, RESENTMENT These outrageous claims are based on hateful, false stereotypes about LGBTQ people, and are divorced from the reality of what kids actually learn about these topics in CSE. But fairness or reality is of no concern to proponents of this strategy; the point of “grooming” discourse is to lob an ideological stink bomb that contaminates anyone near it, while whipping up fear, resentment, and mistrust in education programs that speak to human diversity. It is no coincidence that the same organizations and politicians who object to CSE are also fighting against “critical race theory,” spurring a spate of laws that would prevent honest education in schools about the impacts of racism and white supremacy in our country’s history.

Meanwhile, age-appropriate CSE recommended standards for young children (K-2) are aimed squarely at the prevention of childhood sexual abuse, as well as developing skills needed for kids to seek help from a parent or trusted adult when in dangerous situations. Other CSE standards for young children focus on healthy boundaries (both for self and respecting others), bullying prevention, recognition of/ respect for different types of families, and age-appropriate lessons about anatomy and reproduction (i.e., “where babies come from”). CSE standards around gender roles and gender identity for young children focus on being able to define basic concepts and talk about the range of ways people can express their gender.

By including people of all sexual orientations and gender identities, CSE can benefit all kids and all kinds of families. Indeed, there is evidence that LGBTQ-inclusive sex education offers better mental health outcomes not just to LGBTQ youth, but to all youth.

When discussion of sexual orientation and gender identity is censored inside the classroom, LGBTQ kids and their families are not only isolated and stigmatized, they are actively discriminated against when denied sexual health education that is relevant to their lives.

Hudson Nummerdor is a sexuality educator at The Tool Shed, Milwaukee’s mission-driven, education-based sexuality boutique, and has completed the University of Michigan’s Sexual Health Certificate Program in Sexuality Education.

So, when you see attacks on sex ed headed for your local school board meeting, don’t get bogged down in bad-faith arguments that are deliberately misleading and designed to incite moral panic and fear. Engage in proactive talk about the benefits of CSE. The bottom line? All young people deserve access to sex education that is medically accurate and affirming of their identity.

OCTOBER 2022 | 49

SPECIAL PERSONAL FINANCE

THE HIGH COST OF LIVING AND DYING

BY MICHAEL MUCKIAN

Photo by allanswart/Getty Images.

W

hen my father died in 1995, my mother spent a lot of time getting her thoughts and documents together preparing for her own ultimate demise. She created a “Death Box” which she believed contained all the information necessary for a comfortable and economical passing. It didn’t, but it was a good start.

When her time came in 2016 at age 94, we pretty much knew what she wanted – cremation, no casket or fancy funeral and a social gathering afterwards for friends and family. In 2012 we enrolled her in The Neptune Society, a nationwide cremation firm serving U.S. veterans. (Mom was an Army nurse in World War II.) We thought we were ready.

On that fateful August day, after notifying family members that she had died, we called The Neptune Society. The firm had ceased its Wisconsin operations several years earlier.

Fortunately, they had contracted with several funeral homes to fulfill the contracts they had written. A nice man and his assistant came to manage the next steps, including removing my mother’s body, filing a death certificate, arranging for cremation and returning the ashes to us so she could be 50 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

interred next to my father at Wisconsin Memorial Park in Brookfield. Her Neptune Society plan and internment costs totaled less than $5,000.

Mom got away pretty cheaply. According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the average cost of dying in the U.S. is $19,566. It’s cheaper in a state like Mississippi ($15,516) but more expensive in Hawaii ($36,124). The run-up to that day also is quite pricey.

Currently, 10 percent of all U.S. health care expenditures cover end-of-life care. In 2018, expenditures totaled $3.65 trillion, meaning $365 billion went for those who died. The average person spends more on health care during his or her last years than all previous years combined. According to Arcadia Healthcare Solutions, costs during the last month of life can total up to $32,379 for hospital care and $17,845 for hospice care. Much of the cost is covered by Medicare, but not all of it. Private insurance, including life and health insurance, plays a big role in picking up the balance of those costs.

Those costs differ from person to person based on circumstances. According to the American Journal of Palliative and Hospice Care, 48 percent of deaths occur while in hospice care. Those who die in hospitals total 24.6 percent (inpatient) and 16.4 percent (outpatient). Only 4.8 percent die in a nursing home or similar facility, the rest at home or under visiting medical care. Costs vary as much as do the circumstances of death.

Life is a costly business, and death doesn’t come cheaply either. Plan ahead and become a disciplined financial steward and you may make it to the end. For those set on a traditional approach, the average burial plot in Wisconsin is $2,568, which is 28 percent more affordable than the rest of the country. (Cremation costs average $1,045 in the state.) Add to that the roughly $15,000 in funeral costs with all the trimmings, and in most cases you can still get by for under $20,000.

Before you reach that point, you need to make sure your documents, like ducks, are all in a row. These would include: • A will prepared by an attorney will go a long way in smoothing out many of the speed bumps to settling your estate and avoiding probate. If your estate is substantial you may want to create a living trust, which will enable you to better manage your assets while you are still alive.

• Appoint a power of attorney and health care power of attorney to handle your affairs prior to your death and after. They can be the same person, but since these are legally defined positions the proper paperwork must be signed and witnessed. As part of end-of-life health care goes, advanced directives can clearly state how you want that final care managed.

Mom was set with most of these and what she didn’t have we knew enough to provide. Costs for her five-year health decline was mostly covered by Medicare, supplemental insurance, and long-term care insurance that provided for safe housing and a social atmosphere. Despite some unexpected expenses, no major medical bills came along to decimate her savings or ours.

Mom would been pleased that her passing came in well under the average costs. What none of us knew was that, as a veteran, she qualified for a full military funeral complete with a 21-gun salute. If asked, she would have decried it as “too much fuss,” but by that time she didn’t have a choice.

Frankly, if she was looking down from the afterlife on that day, I think she probably loved it.

Michael Muckian was the banking and finance writer for the Milwaukee Business Journal and is the author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Financing and Accounting and The One-Day MBA in Finance and Accounting.

OCTOBER 2022 | 51

SPECIAL HOME & GARDEN OPEN HOUSE

A Home for Every Season

THIS HUBERTUS HOUSE BRINGS THE OUTDOORS INSIDE ALL YEAR LONG.

BY MARK HAGEN

52 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Photos and illustrations by Michael Burmesch.

O

ne of the great things about this state is its change in seasons. We all have a favorite time of year and living in the Midwest gives everyone an opportunity to relish whichever season they cherish most. For one Wisconsin resident, that love of nature inspired the house of his dreams.

“My goal was to move from Milwaukee to the country and build a contemporary-style home with lots of windows so I could enjoy the scenery all year,” says homeowner Keith. “I was fortunate to find a wooded, 2-acre lot in Hubertus. The Bark River runs behind the property with Bark Lake nearby.”

Keith purchased the secluded plot the day it went on the market and quickly set to designing and building his house.

That was 1992, and the home continues to be a source of inspiration and comfort for Keith as well as his 14-year-old English Springer Spaniel, Kelby.

The two-story, three-bedroom house features large windows and multiple patio doors that allow easy access to a wraparound deck. “I built the deck shortly after I moved in,” Keith explains. “The house sits on a hill, so my deck is 9-feet off the ground. It was a lot of work … and a lot of beers,” he laughs, “but I wanted guests to be able to walk around the entire exterior of the house.”

Whether enjoying the view from the impressive deck or experiencing the woods via the property’s winding 300-foot driveway, Keith’s guests can’t help but feel enveloped by nature. “It’s great when the forest turns green in spring, and OCTOBER 2022 | 53

SPECIAL HOME & GARDEN OPEN HOUSE

No matter the season, Keith enjoys every square inch of his Hubertus home—inside and out.

in summer it’s nice living so close to a lake,” he says. “Fall colors are really spectacular when you live in the woods, but winter is my favorite because the scenery is just so beautiful all around the house.”

Having a deep respect for nature, Keith sought to keep a significant amount of the landscape intact. “I did add a large patio at the front of the house, however. It includes a fountain and several planters, making it a great spot to hang out,” he says.

The home’s color scheme complements the owner’s art collection. “I went with white walls because I have a lot of abstract art and modern glass pieces,” Keith says. “My artwork shows up really well against the white, particularly since much of it features primary colors.”

A TOUCH OF GLASS The interior of the home reflects both Keith’s love of nature and his desire to host friends and family. “I wanted an open-concept because I do a lot entertaining,” he notes. “The first-floor design allows guests to mingle from room to room, and I can easily talk to everyone while I’m in the kitchen cooking.”

Keith’s favorite part of the home is the spacious family room.

Featuring a gas fireplace, bar and cathedral ceilings, it’s clearly the centerpiece of the house. “The room includes floor-to-ceilings windows so I can enjoy all four seasons,” he adds.

54 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Photos and illustrations by Michael Burmesch.

Several of the eclectic glass pieces were created by Keith himself with others coming from local artists and yet additional pieces purchased on vacations. “I’ve made several glass pieces,” he says. “I took classes on glass fusion, and I plan to make more in the future. I’d like to start experimenting with abstract art, creating pieces with glass, metal and wood.”

Keith says his guests enjoy the home’s modern features but continuously comment on the scenery that surrounds the house. “A lot of friends live in city,” he explains, ”when they come here, I want them to enjoy a bit of country living, whether we go swimming in the lake, hiking in the woods or simply enjoying a few cocktails outside.

“I feel fortunate to live here,” Keith continues. “I often travel the short distance to Milwaukee but it’s always nice to be home, no matter what the season.”

Mark Hagen is an award-winning gardener whose work has been featured in numerous publications, including Fresh Home, Country Woman, Birds & Blooms, and Your Family magazines.

OCTOBER 2022 | 55

SPECIAL HOME & GARDEN

So You Want to Start Canning?

DIVE IN, THE WATER’S FINE

BY SHEILA JULSON

I

Photo by monticelllo/Getty Images.

solation during the COVID-19 pandemic propelled an already existing homesteading trend that included home food preservation—remember the canning supply shortages in 2020?

Although COVID restrictions eased and we’re getting out more, home canning is a fun way to preserve Wisconsin’s fall bounty.

Boiling water bath canning uses a large kettle of boiling water. Special jars are filled with food prepared from recipes tested for canning safety.

Jarred product is submerged into boiling water and heated for a specific period of time. This method is used for high-acidic fruits, acidified pickles and salsa.

There are two main methods of canning food that are approved by the U.S. Department of Food & Agriculture: boiling water bath canning, and pressure canning. Both use heat to destroy microorganisms that cause unsafe food spoilage.

Pressure canning involves a large, heavy kettle that creates steam in a locked compartment. Filled jars go into the kettle and are heated to an internal temperature of 240 degrees.

Pounds of pressure are measured with a dial gauge or weighted gauge on the pressure canner lid. A pressure canner is used for low-acidic foods like most vegetables and meats.

SAFETY FIRST! A pressure canner and a pressure cooker (or multicooker) are not interchangeable. A pressure canner is specifically used to process and sterilize foods and can reach adequate temperatures to kill microorganisms.

A pressure cooker is used to cook foods fast.

Photo by Akchamczuk/Getty Images.

56 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Don’t just put a lid on it—older canning techniques such as the oven method, in which filled jars are placed in a heated oven, or the open-kettle canning, where hot food is put into sterilized jars and then immediately sealed but not processed in a canner, have been deemed unreliable by food scientists.

“It’s important to realize that rules have changed since your mother or grandmother were canning over a wood stove,” affirms Barbara Ingham, professor of food sciences at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and food safety specialist with the Division of Extension. “Using equipment readily available today, it is much easier to preserve safe, high-quality food for family and friends. Using tested, upto-date recipes and following those recipes, with no changes, is required to ensure that your garden bounty is safe to consume and share with friends.”

Mason jars, sold under brands including Ball or Kerr, are made with tempered glass to withstand high heat during the canning process. They come with two-piece lids that feature a rubberlike sealing compound and screw band. Jars and screw bands can be reused but the sealing compound on lids break down from heat. Use new lids for each canning session.

be tested yearly for accuracy. Some county extension offices will test dial gauge canners.

Also needed are utensils commonly found in most kitchens: measuring cups and spoons, wooden spoons, spatulas, kitchen timers, zesters, pots and pans and mixing bowls.

Plan your canning day. Think about what to can and find a canning recipe.

“Start with a research-tested recipe,” advises Ingham. The National Center for Home Food Preservation (nchfp. uga.edu) and UW-Madison Division of Extension (fyi.extension.wisc.edu/ safefood) offer recipes that have been developed to ensure safe canning.

Canning food takes a few hours per recipe. Allow time to prepare the recipe (chopping ingredients, cooking the batch and clean up), washing and sterilizing jars and processing the food. Designate a day when you won’t be rushed or interrupted. Keep the weather in mind; boiling water canners generate heat and steam and quickly heat up a kitchen.

Ingredients should be as fresh as possible. Vendors at many area farmers markets sell tomatoes and other produce in large quantities for canning.

With thorough research and planning, home canning is a fun way to stock the pantry with quality food to last throughout winter. Canning classes are available through university extensions, as well as local nonprofits and businesses. For more canning how-to’s and recipes, check out these additional resources: Ball Complete Book of Home Preserving: 400 Delicious and Creative Recipes for Today, by Judi Kingry, Lauren Devine and Sarah Page

Photo by Bychykhin_Olexandr/Getty Images.

TAKING THE PLUNGE Boiling water canning kettles start around $25. Kits that include the kettle and all utensils needed for canning start around $40. Pressure canners average $200. The gauges need to

Beginners Guide to Canning: 90 Easy Recipes to Can, Savor, and Gift, by Diane Devereaux

Sheila Julson writes the Eat Drink column for shepherdexpress.com.

OCTOBER 2022 | 57

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LOCAL ACTIVIST LOCAL CHARACTER LOCAL ENTREPRENEUR LOCAL PODCAST MILWAUKEE ALDERPERSON MILWAUKEE COUNTY SUPERVISOR MILWAUKEE INFLUENCER MILWAUKEEAN OF THE YEAR MINORITY-OWNED BUSINESS MOST BELOVED POLITICIAN MOST DESPISED POLITICIAN MOST TRUSTED PUBLIC OFFICIAL ORGANIZATION SUPPORTING VETERANS NON-PROFIT/HUMAN SERVICES ORGANIZATION PHILANTHROPIST PLACE TO PICK UP THE SHEPHERD EXPRESS PLACE TO WORK FOR SOCIAL JUSTICE PLACE TO WORK FOR ENVIRONMENTAL CHANGE RISING STAR IN POLITICS STATE LEGISLATOR WOMAN-OWNED BUSINESS

BODY, MIND & SPIRIT ACUPUNCTURIST ALTERNATIVE MEDICAL CLINIC BOUTIQUE FITNESS CROSSFIT-STYLE GYM GYM MASSAGE THERAPIST PERSONAL TRAINER PILATES STUDIO REIKI STUDIO SPA YOGA STUDIO

BOUGHT & SOLD ADULT RETAIL STORE ANTIQUE STORE AUTO DEALERSHIP - DOMESTIC AUTO DEALERSHIP - IMPORT AUTO DEALERSHIP - PREOWNED BIKE SHOP BOOKSTORE BOUTIQUE CLOTHING CAMPING EQUIPMENT CARPET/FINE RUGS CBD RETAIL SHOP CLOTHING - CHILDREN'S CLOTHING - MEN'S CLOTHING - WOMEN'S COMIC BOOK STORE EYEWEAR FASHION ACCESSORIES FINE JEWELRY STORE FLORIST FURNITURE - NEW FURNITURE - RESTORED GARDEN CENTER GIFT SHOP HARDWARE STORE HEAD SHOP LIGHTING SHOWROOM MATTRESS STORE MOTORCYCLE DEALERSHIP MUSICAL INSTRUMENT STORE NEW RETAIL STORE (OPENED IN (2021) NOVELTY/VARIETY STORE PET RETAIL STORE RECORD STORE SHOE STORE TOBACCO SHOP VAPE SHOP VINTAGE/THRIFT STORE

HOME IMPROVEMENT ARCHITECT BASEMENT/REC ROOM REMODELER BATHROOM REMODELER CLOSET DESIGN ELECTRICIAN HOME BUILDER HOME REMODELING KITCHEN REMODELER LANDSCAPER/LAWN MAINTENANCE PLUMBER ROOFER WINDOW & SIDING

HOT HAM & ROLLS LIQUOR STORE MEAT SELECTION SAUSAGE SAUSAGE SHOP SODA TAKE-OUT DELI TEA WINE SELECTION

LOCALLY OWNED RESTAURANT AFRICAN RESTAURANT BAR FOOD BARBECUE BREAKFAST BREW PUB BRUNCH BUFFET BURGERS BURRITO CARIBBEAN RESTAURANT CENTRAL/SOUTH AMERICAN RESTAURANT CHEAP EATS CHEESE CURDS CHEF CHICKEN SANDWICH CHICKEN WINGS CHINESE RESTAURANT COFFEE SHOP DONUTS FAMILY FRIENDLY RESTAURANT FARM-TO-TABLE RESTAURANT FISH FRY

LGBTQ DRAG EVENT DRAG PERSONALITY LGBTQ ADVOCATE LGBTQ EVENT LGBTQ-INCLUSIVE BUSINESS LGBTQ-OWNED BUSINESS

LOCALLY OWNED FOOD-RETAIL ARTISANAL CHEESE BACON BAKERY BEER SELECTION BRATWURST BUTCHER SHOP CHEESE CURDS CHEESE SELECTION CHOCOLATIER CRAFT BEER CUPCAKES DISTILLED SPIRITS FARMERS MARKET FROZEN PIZZA GOURMET POPCORN GROCERY - ALL PURPOSE GROCERY - ETHNIC GROCERY - GOURMET GROCERY – ORGANIC HARD CIDER HOME COOKING MEAL KITS

OCTOBER 2022 | 59

SPECIAL BEST OF MILWAUKEE

FRENCH RESTAURANT FRIED CHEESE CURDS FROZEN YOGURT SHOP GELATO SHOP GERMAN RESTAURANT GLUTEN-FREE/FRIENDLY RESTAURANT GOURMET RESTAURANT GREEK RESTAURANT HOT DOG HOTEL RESTAURANT ICE CREAM/FROZEN CUSTARD STAND INDIAN/PAKISTANI RESTAURANT IRISH RESTAURANT ITALIAN RESTAURANT JAPANESE RESTAURANT JEWISH/KOSHER-STYLE RESTAURANT KITCHEN OPEN AFTER 10 P.M. KOREAN RESTAURANT LOUISIANA/SOUTHERN RESTAURANT MAC & CHEESE MEDITERRANEAN RESTAURANT MEXICAN RESTAURANT MIDDLE EASTERN RESTAURANT NEW RESTAURANT (OPENED IN 2021) OUTDOOR DINING PIZZERIA - DEEP DISH PIZZERIA - THIN CRUST PIZZERIA - WOOD-FIRED OVEN PLACE TO EAT ALONE RAMEN RESTAURANT OPEN ON CHRISTMAS DAY RESTAURANT SERVICE RESTAURANT WITH A VIEW RIBS ROMANTIC RESTAURANT SANDWICH SEAFOOD RESTAURANT SOUL FOOD SOUPS STEAKHOUSE STREET FOOD VENDOR SUB SANDWICH SUPPER CLUB SUSHI TACO TAKEOUT/CURBSIDE PICKUP TAPAS (SMALL PLATES) THAI RESTAURANT VEGAN-FRIENDLY RESTAURANT VEGETARIAN-FRIENDLY RESTAURANT VIETNAMESE RESTAURANT WINE LIST

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MEDICAL ALCOHOL & DRUG REHAB CENTER CHIROPRACTOR COSMETIC DENTIST COSMETIC SURGEON DENTIST EYE DOCTOR HOME MEDICAL CARE HOSPITAL LASIK SURGEON OCCUPATIONAL THERAPIST ORTHODONTIST PERIODONTIST PHYSICAL THERAPIST PSYCHIATRIST / PSYCHOLOGIST TELEMEDICINE PROVIDER WOMEN'S MEDICAL SERVICES

MILWAUKEE MUSIC ACOUSTIC MUSICIAN ALT COUNTRY BLUEGRASS BAND BLUES BAND CLUB DJ COVER/TRIBUTE BAND ELECTRONIC ARTIST FOLK BAND JAZZ COMBO METAL BAND MUSIC PRODUCER POLKA BAND RAP/HIP-HOP ARTIST ROCK BAND VOCALIST - FEMALE VOCALIST – MALE

OUT & ABOUT ALL-AGES VENUE ARCADE/GAMING ART STUDIO/CLASSES (NON-BAR) ATTRACTION FOR OUT-OF-TOWN GUESTS AXE THROWING BAR BAR FOR QUIET CONVERSATION BAR ON A BUDGET BAR TO BE SEEN IN BAR TO WATCH SOCCER BAR WITH A PATIO BEER GARDEN BLOODY MARY BREWERY TOUR COCKTAIL LOUNGE COCKTAIL KIT CRAFT BEER SELECTION AT A BAR DANCE CLUB ESCAPE ROOM HAPPY HOUR HOOKAH LOUNGE HOTEL LOUNGE IMPORT BEER SELECTION AT A BAR IRISH PUB JAZZ CLUB KARAOKE BAR LIVE MUSIC VENUE MARGARITA MARTINI MICROBREWERY/TAPROOM MILWAUKEE TOUR NEW BAR (OPENED IN 2021) PAINT & WINE BAR PET-FRIENDLY ESTABLISHMENT PLACE FOR FAMILY FUN ROCK CLUB

ROMANTIC BAR SPORTS BAR STRIP CLUB TRIVIA NIGHT VIDEO ARCADE WHISKEY SELECTION AT A BAR WINERY

REAL ESTATE REAL ESTATE AGENCY REAL ESTATE AGENT/BROKER RENTAL PROPERTY MANAGEMENT GROUP

SERVICES RENDERED ACCOUNTANT/TAX ADVISOR AESTHETICIAN ANIMAL WELFARE ORGANIZATION AUTO BODY SHOP AUTO DETAILER AUTO SERVICE & REPAIR BANK BED AND BREAKFAST BODY PIERCING STUDIO BOUTIQUE HOTEL CATERER COLLEGE / UNIVERSITY CREDIT UNION DOGGY DAY CARE/BOARDING FINANCIAL INSTITUTION FOR GETTING A BUSINESS LOAN FINANCIAL INSTITUTION FOR GETTING A HOME MORTGAGE FINANCIAL INSTITUTION FOR OPENING A CHECKING ACCOUNT FINANCIAL INSTITUTION PROVIDING BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE FINANCIAL PLANNER/STOCKBROKER GREEN BUSINESS HAIR REMOVAL HAIR SALON - MEN'S HAIR SALON - WOMEN'S HOTEL ROOMS INSURANCE AGENCY INSURANCE AGENT/BROKER LAW FIRM - BANKRUPTCY LAW FIRM - BUSINESS LAW FIRM - CRIMINAL DEFENSE LAW FIRM - DIVORCE LAW FIRM - ESTATE PLANNING LAW FIRM - FAMILY LAW LAW FIRM - FULL SERVICE LAW FIRM - PERSONAL INJURY PET GROOMING/SERVICES PHOTOGRAPHER PICTURE FRAMING GALLERY NAIL SALON TATTOO PARLOR VETERINARIAN WEDDING VENUE

SPORTS & RECREATION BOWLING ALLEY ENDURANCE EVENT FAVORITE BREWERS PLAYER FAVORITE BUCKS PLAYER FAVORITE PACKERS PLAYER GOLF COURSE MINI GOLF COURSE PADDLESPORTS - RENT OR BUY REC SPORTS LEAGUE ROCK CLIMBING VENUE

OCTOBER 2022 | 61

CULTURE

Conjuring a Conversation with Milwaukee’s

David Seebach

BY MICHAEL MUCKIAN

T

housands of musicians, comedians and other artists have performed during Summerfest’s 53-year run, but none more often than David Seebach, who this year celebrated 41 years at Summerfest with five performances of his annual “Wonders of Magic” show at the festival’s Northwestern Mutual Community Park.

Seebach, who grew up in Milwaukee’s Sherman Park neighborhood, has been making scarves magically appear, shuffling slight-of-hand card decks, sawing assistants in half and turning pretty showgirls into full-sized tigers for more than five decades. In addition to Summerfest, he has performed at corporate meetings, in conjunction with symphony orchestras, and in theaters and venues across the United States, as well as several European ports of call.

“I am an entertainer and performer who demonstrates the impossible in an engaging manner,” Seebach says of his act.

“It was the French conjurer Jean-Eugène Robert-Houdin (from whom Wisconsin magician Harry Houdini adapted his name) who said that the magician is an actor who plays the role of a wizard."

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PUTTING ON A SHOW Seebach’s “wizarding ways” began with the remnants of a child’s magic kit provided by his older brother Dick at age 6 and a supportive father who lined up his first gig at age 12. His father, Edward E. Seebach, was the Milwaukee Public Library System’s head of circulation and likely helped his youngest son land his first show at the former Center Street Library in the mid-‘60s. He was paid $7.50 for the performance. Little did the 12-year-old Seebach know then that he was conjuring up what would become a lifelong performance career.

“I always liked putting on a show,” says Seebach, who in his youth dabbled in theater, college radio and amateur filmmaking. “Very often magic tricks allowed my imagination to get creative and tell some stories as part of the performance. That’s why people come, and that’s what entertains them.”

Seebach continued mastering his craft throughout high school, eventually graduating into a pre-business curriculum at UW-Milwaukee. As a business student, Seebach All photos courtesy of David Seebach.

was less than stellar. That all changed when friends at UWM’s School of Fine Arts coaxed him into moving to their discipline. His academic performance soared and he graduated with honors.

During his college years Seebach saw a magic show at the University of Illinois that involved students as assistants. Intrigued, he pitched UWM on the same concept, suggesting that the proceeds be used to fund scholarships to the UWM theater department. It was so successful that he performed the show at the school for 10 years running.

“I really wanted to get into the big theater there, and this gave me access to the stage and all the equipment, which helped me hone the quality of my craft,” Seebach says. “I was able to perform one big illusion after another, and that helped me develop my on-stage character.”

The UWM experience was central to developing his act, but it was the eight summers he spent entertaining vacationers at Deer Park Lodge (now the Chippewa Retreat Resort) in Manitowish Waters that provided his graduate-level education. After a two-week tryout in 1970, he earned a summer-long gig at the resort’s show lounge with 10 shows per week, plus closeup magic during cocktail hours. He further developed his performance skills and magical acumen and, after performing his last show in 1979, was ready for the big time.

“I didn’t really have a watershed moment when I knew that magic was going to be my career,” Seebach says. “But people enjoyed what I did, told me I was good at it, and paid me for it, so I just kept on doing it.”

MAESTRO AND MAGICIAN Seebach has since become the envy of his magical peers, both locally as well as throughout the industry. The sophistication and grandeur of his performances have increased, and his inventory of equipment has grown to a warehouse full of illusions he estimates would cost a half-million dollars to replace. The leagues of current and former assistants now number in the tens of dozens, almost too many to remember, he says.

of time. He also has used wild animals in his act courtesy Jo-Don Farms, a private zoo in Franksville that’s now closed.

He worked with mountain lions, jaguars, leopards, lion cubs and his personal favorite, tigers. He hasn’t done it in several years since the use of animals has fallen out of favor.

Now standing on the other side of 70, Seebach has not stopped performing, but he has gotten more selective in the engagements he accepts. In fact, one of his favorite performances will run once again at the end of this month, just in time for Halloween.

“David Seebach’s Illusions in the Night”, a longtime seasonal favorite of Milwaukee magic fans, will run for four perfor“I think I carved a pretty unique niche in southeastern Wismances Oct. 15-17 at Elm Grove’s Sunset Playhouse, and consin,” he says. “There isn’t anyone else with as deep a repthen an additional three performances Oct. 28-30 at Lake ertoire as mine with the possible exception of New Berlin naGeneva’s Tristan Crist Magic Theater. The show provides tive Tristan Crist, who owns and performs in his own theater the magician with ample opportunities to spin tales of in Lake Geneva, and Rick Wilcox, who grew up in Brookfield mystery and imagination while dazzling audiences with and does a similar act in his own theater in Wisconsin Dells.” eye-popping illusions.

Seebach also cites Glen Gerard, who does magic at the Hilton Milwaukee City Center and Julie Sobanski, who bills herself as “The Princess of Magic.” “After that, the drop-off among local conjurers is pretty steep,” he adds.

Over the years, Seebach has adapted his act to include a series called “The Maestro and the Magician,” which he premiered with North Dakota’s Greater Grand Forks Symphony Orchestra, during which he performs with the orchestra as well as swapping rolls with the conductor for a short period

“Almost everyone can execute the magic part of the show if they try because that’s a skill and you can teach a skill,” Seebach says. “But the entertainment part is truly an art.”

Michael Muckian was the banking and finance writer for the Milwaukee Business Journal and is the author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Financing and Accounting and The One-Day MBA in Finance and Accounting.

OCTOBER 2022 | 63

CULTURE

This Month in Milwaukee

10 THINGS TO DO IN OCTOBER

BY ALLEN HALAS, ELIZABETH LINTONEN AND DAVID LUHRSSEN

OCTOBER 7

t Mary Wimmer, The Art of the Break

Boswell Books The perfect way to spend a chilly October night is within the cozy confines of the Boswell Book Company. Wisconsinbased author Mary Wimmer will be hosting a conversation about her latest novel, The Art of the Break. The novel follows Charlie Sobczak in her journey of friendship, love, loss and cheesemaking. A very Wisconsin novel to perfectly compliment a night well spent at the bookstore, the conversation about The Art of the Break begins at 6:30 p.m.

OCTOBER 8 An Evening of Classical Opera and Armenian Folk Songs South Milwaukee Performing Arts Center Metropolitan Opera tenor Yeghishe Manucharyan and Boston Opera mezzo-soprano Victoria Avetisyan are a married couple who met in their native Armenia when paired together as singers during their conservatory years. “We have been duet partners ever since,” Manucharyan says. At their Milwaukee debut, they will sing Verdi, Mozart and Puccini while also taking their audience to a less familiar place through haunting words and melodies from Armenia.

OCTOBER 9

Peter Mulvey & SistaStrings q The Back Room at Colectivo Singer/songwriter Peter Mulvey has a storied career of promoting positivity and using music to communicate in times of division. His bond with string duo and Milwaukee natives SistaStrings formed over playing a show at the Café Carpe in Fort Atkinson in 2020, which ultimately became a tremendous live record. Since then, SistaStrings have moved to Nashville, toured with Brandi Carlile, and reunited with Mulvey for a new record, Love is the Only Thing. They’ll bring the magic of great songwriting and top-level technical musicianship for a special evening on the East Side.

Photo by NeoPG/Getty Images.

OCTOBER 1 New Wave Fest Shank Hall Milwaukee’s Xposed 4Heads received an unexpected late career boost when DJ Rodney Bingenheimer played “New Wave Apocalypse” on his SiriusXM show. The other local acts on the bill are trading on more than nostalgia, withThe Quilz gaining airplay on WMSE and 88Nine and The First Wave’s opening for ABC in Chicago.

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OCTOBER 2022 | 65

CULTURE OCTOBER 18 Paul Salsini, Sondheim & Me Boswell Books

Veteran Milwaukee journalist Paul Salsini reflects on editing the Sondheim Review in his latest book, Sondheim & Me: Revealing a Musical Genius. Sondheim & Me accounts for the author’s fandom, reports on how the Review was fun and includes assorted letters and notes from Stephen Sondheim. Many cultural figures at his level would have looked on Salsini’s endeavor with Olympian detachment. Not Sondheim, who applauded, complained, corrected and supplied context. It was a friendly long-distance relationship between editor and subject.

OCTOBER 13 The Eradicator, Cryptual, Overhand p X-Ray Arcade Ski masks, squash, and punk rock come together for The Eradicator, a heavy quartet based entirely on a sketch from The Kids in the Hall. Their third LP, Forever The Eradicator, is due out on October 7, with a release show planned for the following week at Cudahy’s X-Ray Arcade. Four of the tracks from the band of veterans in the hardcore and punk scene’s album are currently streaming on their Bandcamp page. Joining the carnage on the squash court, make that dance floor, are metal band Cryptual and emo outfit Overhand.

OCTOBER 18 Ace Hood, Slim Diesel The Rave If you’ve followed hip hop for the better part of the last decade, chances are you’ve heard something that Ace Hood has been involved with. Known most for his single, “Bugatti,” Hood is currently experiencing a new lease on creative life, after leaving DJ Khaled’s We the Best label for greener pastures. Less about the hit single and more about connecting with the fans, Ace Hood recently released a project, M.I.N.D. (Memories Inside Never Die), this past February.

Joining Ace Hood will be Miami rapper and collaborator Slim Diesel, as well as local support.

OCTOBER 14-16 Florentine Opera, Roméo et Juliette u Marcus Performing Arts Center Uilhlein Hall Although spellbound as a child by a performance of Rossini’s Otello, Charles Gounod long resisted the temptation to compose in the idiom of arias and prima donnas. Ironically, the French composer is most remembered for his operas, especially Faust (1859) and Roméo et Juliette (1867). His romantic lyricism was well suited for William Shakespeare’s archetypal story of doomed young love across society’s battlelines.

Illustration by Andrew_Howe/Getty Images.

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OCTOBER 28-30

OCTOBER 29

Milwaukee Opera Theatre, Night of the Living Opera Broadway Theatre Center Studio Theatre.

Zombies as we know them today arrived with George Romero’s 1968 cult film, Night of the Living Dead. Romero’s conception of zombies as a mindless, all-devouring horde inspired other filmmakers—and performing artists. With Night of the Living Opera, Milwaukee Opera Theatre works with Angry Young Men’s puppeteers to stage a musical adaptation of the film. “If I had to put it in a category, I’d say it’s cinematic in its sweeping expressivity,” says MOT’s Artistic Director Jill Anna Ponasik of the music. This will be a staged reading with piano, puppets, actors and a chorus of singers. The full production is slated for Halloween 2023.

Mightmare, Rat Bath, Kat and the Hurricane, Dandy L. Freling, DJ Honeyboy q Cactus Club North Carolina-based Mightmare is headed to Bay View, and a bill of local, LGBTQ-friendly alternative acts are rounding out the night. Fronted by River Shook of Sarah Shook and the Disarmers, Mightmare is a new outfit with their debut LP, Cruel Liars, out this month. Supporting the band will be Milwaukee’s own country-punk hybrid, Rat Bath, Madison indie pop act Kat and the Hurricane, Americana from Dandy L. Freling, and a DJ set from Honeyboy inside the bar between acts. All proceeds from this show benefit the 21st Street Housing Cooperative.

TOP ROW (Left to Right): Mightmare, Kat and the Hurricane, Dandy L. Freling BOTTOM ROW (Left to Right): RatBath, Honeyboy

Photos courtesy of cactusclubmilwaukee.com

OCTOBER 2022 | 67

LIFESTYLE CANNABIS

| SPONSORED BY RA!

Photo courtesy of RA!

Photo courtesy of RA!

Madison’s Company Produces CBD Locally and Organically

BY SHEILA JULSON

R

a! all natural hemp products is a wellness company and lifestyle brand founded by Richard Bowman and Alla Tsypin. Ra!—a play on the word raw— offers cannabidiol (CBD) edibles, tinctures and topicals crafted through a trademarked Whole Spectrum processing method that captures CBD and all ancillary cannabinoids.

68 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Bowman, a musician and real estate agent, and Tsypin, an herbalist of 25 years and co-founder of Madison-based Nessalla craft kombucha, met socially in Madison. Both were ready to try something new. Tsypin had sold Nessalla in 2020 and wanted to get back to her herbalist roots.

Photo courtesy of RA!

One night, Bowman and Tsypin returned home to find Bowman’s senior American bulldog, Polar Bear, unresponsive. A visit to an emergency veterinarian revealed she had cancer and heart issues. As cannabis users, Bowman and Tsypin decided to try CBD to help Polar Bear.

“We gave her CBD. It bought her another four months,” Tsypin says. “She became vibrant and could go up and down stairs. It bought Richard and his son time to say goodbye and have these final moments with her in a positive way. She was happy and thriving, and was present in body, soul and spirit.”

Bowman adds that Polar Bear was with his 7-year-old son for his entire life and was a big part of the family. “It was important for him to say goodbye not in a sad, dark way, but in a way to celebrate her moving on to a different space,” Bowman adds. The experience inspired them to bring CBD wellness to others.

BUILDING A UNIQUE BRAND After two years of research, development and working with labs, Bowman and Tsypin officially launched Ra! in October 2021 at the USA CBD Expo, in Chicago. With a focus on the wellness aspect of CBD, they plan to build a wellness community while educating people how CBD can help with autoimmune disorders, as well as recovery and addiction.

Bowman and Tsypin praised the quality of Wisconsin-grown hemp and strive to keep all aspects of their business as local as possible, from the farmers from which they source hemp to the labs and processors.

Bowman already had a clear vision for the branding. “I knew exactly who I wanted to use for the branding—the look, the feel, the aesthetic and the colors are all so paramount, especially in this industry,” he emphasizes. As members of Generation X, they feel that demographic is often overlooked.

“As Gen Xers, we’re parents and even grandparents, we have jobs, careers and lots of other things going on, and we have to do it all with anxiety or achy joints or muscles,” Tsypin says. “We still have to keep up with the children and stay relevant, so CBD is such a great way to stay healthy.”

She adds that during the COVID-19 pandemic, more people sought to take their health seriously and looked for alternative ways to stay healthy and strong.

WHOLE SPECTRUM PRODUCTS RA! has a wide array of edibles including Delta-9 gummies, tinctures and topicals. For processing, Bowman and Tsypin work with American Extractions, based in Janesville, Wis. The company uses a processing method called Whole Spectrum, which doesn’t use solvents, chemicals or CO2 extraction.

“It’s based on physics rather than chemistry,” Tsypin says.

“You’re literally getting the plant as nature intended, with all the oils and cannabinoids. American Extractions states in its website that the Whole Spectrum process “captures all elements within the cannabinoids, and all the terpenes at a higher intensity and strength.”

Bowman, a Type 1 diabetic, says they’re hard at work on a new formulation that will be a game-changer to help others with diabetes. “We want to pay it forward. It’s all about wellness and what we can bring to people.”

With a goal to educate and collaborate, Bowman and Tsypin hope that RA! will become a leader among Wisconsin-based cannabis businesses. They want to expand their retail presence and offer classes throughout Milwaukee and Madison. “The more people we collaborate with, the word will travel farther,” Bowman concludes. “We’re building roads for the next generation.”

RA! can be found online through feelraco.com, at the Whitefish Bay Farmers Market, Uptown Pharmacy, in Shorewood, and The Glitter Workshop, at Garver Feed Mill, in Madison.

Sheila Julson writes the Eat Drink column for shepherdexpress.com.

OCTOBER 2022 | 69

HEAR ME OUT DEAR RUTHIE | SPONSORED BY UW CREDIT UNION

PUB CRAWLS AND PUMPKINS AND ... OH, MY! I’ve always thought Halloween is a high-holy day for the LGBTQ+ community, and this year’s lineup of costume contests, spooky shows and creepy bar crawls only proves my point. See my social calendar for a list of events sure to spice up your spooktacular lineup. First, however, let’s check out an email from a frustrated reader.

DEAR RUTHIE, I’ve been doing drag for 3 months. At first, my friends were supportive, coming to see me perform. Now they’re full of excuses, and I’m lucky if any of them show up. How can I tell them my feelings are hurt when they don’t come to an appearance?

(SIGNED),

Losł & Lonely DEAR L&L, Are you doing drag for you or for your besties? If it’s the later, you might be in it for the wrong reasons, honey. While it can be intimidating to perform without a cheering section, that’s when you dig deep and pull out your best performance. Focus on the people who are there, and not the people who aren’t, and you’ll be a happier (and more successful) performer in the end.

XXOO

Ruthie

Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at dearruthie@shepex.com.

Follow her on social media, too!

Facebook: Dear Ruthie | Instagram: RuthieKeester | Twitter: @DearRuthie

70 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

DEAR RUTHIE BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Ruthie's Social Calendar OCTOBER 1

BOMBSHELL THEATRE’S SEASON PREVIEW GALA AT SUNSET PLAYHOUSE (700 WALL ST.): A fantastic night of food, beverages, live performances and more await when you attend this 6 p.m. event. Your $75 donation includes a voucher to a future production, dinner buffet and more. See bombshelltheatre.org for tickets.

OCTOBER 7 BUSINESS EQUALITY LUNCHEON AT THE PFISTER HOTEL (424 E. WISCONSIN AVE.): Cream City Foundation hosts this afternoon featuring keynote speakers Mayor Cavalier Johnson and Elle Halo. Mix and mingle with LGBTQ+ business leaders when you see creamcityfdn.org for table, group and individual ticket info to the 11:30 a.m. luncheon.

BIG NIGHT OUT 2022 AT DISCOVERY WORLD (315 W. COURT ST.): I host this celebratory night that starts with a 5:30 p.m. cocktail hour, followed by dinner, a drag show and live auctions, all to benefit the MKE LGBT Community Center.

Attend the social event of the year by purchasing your $100 ticket at mkelgbt.org.

OCTOBER 15 WITCH WAY WINE WALK (VARIOUS LOCATIONS THROUGHOUT DOWNTOWN WEST BEND): Grab your broom and head over to this change-of-pace pub crawl where more than 20 businesses offer up wine tastings. Tickets to the 5 p.m. night start at $40 and can be found at brownpapertickets.com.

OCTOBER 16 PREMIER OF RAW! UNCUT! VIDEO! AT LEATHER ARCHIVES & MUSEUM (6418 N. GREENVIEW AVE., CHICAGO): Head to the Windy City for the 3 p.m. premier of this documentary about a studio at the dawn of the gay-porn video industry. The movie won several awards at film festivals around the world. See why with a $10 ticket available at the door.

OCTOBER 21 & OCTOBER 22 PUMPKIN PAVILION AT HUMBOLDT PARK (3000 S. HOWELL AVE.): Don’t miss this enchanting Halloween event where hundreds of carved pumpkins light the night. Bands, magic and so much more run 4-10 p.m. both evenings.

OCTOBER 23 THROUGH OCTOBER 30 “BOB’S BURGERS LIVE!” AT HAMBURGER MARY’S (730 S. FIFTH ST.): The Belchers are back with an all-new dinner-theater experience. That’s right! Your $41 ticket includes a choice of dinner options to enjoy before (and during) the play. See bobsatmarys.brownpapertickets.com for tickets to the 7 p.m. comedy.

OCTOBER 24 A HISTORY OF MILWAUKEE DRAG BOOK DISCUSSION AT BOSWELL BOOK COMPANY (2559 N. DOWNER AVE.): Discover the history of Cream City drag with a book reading, talk back and book signing by authors Michail Takach and B.J. Daniels. The event starts at 6:30 p.m. but arrive early as seating is limited.

OCTOBER 28 DIVAS OF LAKE GENEVA SPOOKTACULAR DRAG SHOW AT THIRSTY PARROT (W3725 CLUB HOUSE DRIVE, LAKE GENEVA): Loretta Love Lee and Mercedes Benzova host this night of devilish debauchery at 8 p.m. The evening includes a costume contest so come dressed to kill—so to speak.

OCTOBER 29 & OCTOBER 30 RUTHIE’S BOO-TI-FUL BRUNCH AT HAMBURGER MARY’S (730 S. FIFTH ST.): Join me and my gal pals for brunch! Both Saturday and Sunday brunches feature two seatings (11:30 a.m. and 2 p.m.). Get your Halloween on with bottomless mimosas and Mary’s munchable-brunchable menu. Reserve your table at hamburgermarys.com/mke.

OCTOBER 2022 | 71

HEAR ME OUT | SPONSORED BY UW CREDIT UNION

‘Ralph Kerwineo and the Refining Influence of Skirts’

CHRIS HOLOYDA’S NEW PLAY ABOUT MILWAUKEE’S FAMOUS BUT UNKNOWN TRANSGENDER MAN

BY PAUL MASTERSON

I

n 1914 a local newspaper headline exclaimed “Milwaukee ‘Man’ Clerk Proves Girl Cora, Alias ‘Ralph Kerwineo,’ is Heroine of Unparalleled Venture.” It is one of many sensational headlines both the local and national citizenry would read over the course of the trial of Milwaukeean Ralph Kerwineo, nee Cora Anderson. Kerwineo had been arrested for disorderly conduct after his companion, Mamie White, with whom he had been living as her husband for 10 years, revealed his female birth gender to the police after Kerwineo legally married a local Polish girl, Dorothy Kleinowsky. Needless to say, not only headlines ensued.

For all its dynamics of gender identity, race and morality, aside from a few scholarly forays, there has never been a dramatization of Ralph Kerwineo’s story on stage or screen. Until now, that is.

create an accurate portrayal of Ralph Kerwineo and the events surrounding his 1914 trial. Asked who Kerwineo is, author Holoyda offers a basic description but defers to the man himself for an answer.

Opening October 7 and running through October 23, Emerald Condor Production presents the world premiere of local playwright Chris Holoyda’s new play, Ralph Kerwineo and the Refining Influence of Skirts.

“Ralph Kerwineo is a transman of color, part African and part Native American, who presents as Bolivian.,” he says.

“I suppose there’s an argument that Kerwineo is a woman who decided to dress as a man to take advantage of socio-economic opportunities. But, in his own conception, he’s not a woman dressing as a man, he’s a Bolivian man.” When asked about his work’s

Based in part on historical research provided by Milwaukee historian Matthew Prigge, Holoyda’s play seeks to

ABOVE: 1914 Newspaper headline.

RIGHT: Photos of Cora Anderson and Cora as Ralph Kerwinieo from 1914.

Images courtesy of Inspiration Studios and Chris Holoyda.

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INSPIRATION STUDIOS Photo by Michael Burmesch.

point-of-view, he continues, “The first purpose of the script is to depict the history as accurately as possible. There was a lot of news coverage to draw from about ‘the woman dressed as a man living among us for 10 years,’ as it was put at the time. Being true to the character and true to his arc is in filling in what’s not available historically. In Kerwineo’s trial he puts forward his world view. Discounting his perception of himself does him a disservice. It’s important not to tell audience what to think but to tease out the themes and let them draw a conclusion.”

HONORING HIS EXPERIENCE A unique aspect is the fact that Kerwineo’s gender identity is male, something that is rarely addressed in depictions of transgender characters. “Fundamentally, the show honors Kerwineo’s experience as a trans man by not treating it in a superficial way.

Most portrayals of trans characters are male to female with lots of focus on physical issues and dress. The trans experience is internal and those physical things distract from the internal experience,” Holoyda says.

Obviously, in an era when conformity was the norm, there are multiple layers to contend with in this story.

Broadly, there are the interracial and socio-economic dynamics, the political and moral mind-set of pre-World War I America, the law and the justice system and, on a micro-cosmic level, the personal relationships and their emotional and moral conflicts. Then there’s the combined impact of all of it on the individuals.

Distilling that mash-up into a play sounds difficult enough, even without gender identity as the central focus of it all. With trans issues at the forefront

of today’s LGBTQ political discussion, it’s a particularly treacherous social-scape for any playwright. In this case, perhaps more so because Holoyda is straight.

If you go, ticket information may be found on Emerald Condor Productions social media pages. Performance take place at Inspiration Studios, 1500 South 73rd Street West Allis, WI 53214

GETTING THE STORY TOLD Responding to today’s pervading skepticism by some that only those who live certain life experiences can write about them or play the roles that represent them, the author is realistic.

While consulting with queer and trans individuals in writing the play, he is a pragmatic about his role in delivering the story. “I would hope skeptical people will come to see it. Ideally, they will find a lot in the themes and concepts to dig into. I feel it’s important to do the show to get the story out. Writers write about things outside their experience as do actors who perform roles outside theirs. After our version, if an all-trans company would take on the show and do it their way, it would be exciting.

Theater is collaborative. To the extent that we don’t get it right, I hope someone takes it upon themselves to do it better,” Holoyda says.

Paul Masterson is an LGBTQ activist and writer and has served on the boards of the Milwaukee Gay Arts Center, Milwaukee Pride, GAMMA and other organizations.

The play’s director, Jarvell William, reflected on his role in bringing Ralph Kerwineo to life. “It’s definitely difficult because I’m not a part of the trans community. That particular identity is something that hasn’t been given its just due. In the early 1900s, he was classified as a male-impersonator. My approach is humanistic. I want to keep it in the forefront that this is a man who is not to be judged, no matter what the particular journey is. This is a real person. The real emotional connection is manifested in his motives and how he thinks. Because he’s a historical figure, that connection won’t too far removed from our experiences.” William says.

OCTOBER 2022 | 73

ART FOR ART'S SAKE

From The City That Always Sweeps

BY ART KUMBALEK

I

’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a?

So listen, what with the mid-term elections coming up around the corner of the very early November like a bad burrito, I hear that the people ask: How do you get two politicians to act bipartisan? Hey—lock one up in prison.

Ba-ding! And the people yearn to know what is the difference between a multiwealthy-ass candidate for political office and a sack of manure? I figure it’s got to be the sack, what the fock.

Yeah yeah, it’s the month of October we now need to deal with, the supposed tenth month of the year according to our ferkakta calendar of the so-called Julian and Gregorian calendars from some 1,000 years ago.

However, Oct seems to be a root for the numerical “eight” around the world (“ocho” Spanish; “otto” Italian; “acht” du lieber, German; 八 (捌) bā Chinese; “oito” Portugese).

(Hold on a second. It’s the focking phone; got to pick it up, it could be my doctor with test results since it’s that time of year for scary. OK, it’s my buddy Little Jimmy Iodine. Relax and have a nice smoke, I’ll be right back.)

“Yeah, so Artie, you still coming over Trick-or-Treat morning to help me make the mashed potatoes, gravy and scrambled eggs for the kids when they come by later to ring my bell with their costumes?”

“I forgot about the trick-and treating, Jimmy. But I remember last year, this little kid who’s got one of those whatyou-call speech predicaments knocks on my door. “Bick or beet,” he says. I say, “And what are you supposed to be for Halloween?” Kid says, “A birate.”

I say, “So where are your buccaneers?”

And the kid says, “On the side of my buckin’ head, fockstick.”

“I’ll tell you’s, Artie, this Halloween time can be spooky ’cause it underlines that you never know what’s coming to burn your butt-ski but good in a minute, an hour, a day, next week, month or year. We’re all like that boat The Titanic. Each and every one of us has some kind of big-ass personalized iceberg out there somewheres just waiting to tear us a new one sideways at any moment, one that would be the farthest thing from your mind, I don’t care who you are.”

“Any examples, Jimmy?”

So “eight” became “ten”? Cripes, math- “You betcha, Artie: Goliath had his David. Adam had his apple. Jesus ematics seems to be the devil’s work had his Judas. The Persians had when it comes to calendar months of their Marathon. Mama Cass had her the year, but somehow we put a man chicken bone. Rome had its Visigoths. on the moon 50-focking years ago.

Europe had its Plague. Garfield had What a world.

74 | SHEPHERD EXPRESS

his Guiteau. Dewey had his Truman.

The U.S. had its Ho Chi-Minh. Mary Scot had her Elizabeth Virgin. Jimmy Hoffa had the trunk of a mid-’70s GM product. The Archduke had his Sarajevo. William Holden had his pointy cornered end table. Custer had his Big Horn. Frank Zappa had his prostate.

Nixon had his 5 o’clock shadow. Nixon had his plumbers. McKinley had his Czolgosz. Socrates had his hemlock.

Fonzie had his shark. Impressionists had their Expressionists. John Gilbert had his Talkies. Bobby Rydell had his Beatles. Trotsky had that ax in the skull, o-u-c-h, ain’a? Focking Nazis had their Russian winter. Abbott & Costello had their IRS. God had his Big Bang. Stevie Ray had his helicopter. Nellie Rockefeller had his secretary. Lincoln had his “American Cousin.” Raskolnikov had his old lady.

Davy Crockett had his Alamo. James Dean had his Porsche Spyder. Galileo had his Inquisition. Liston had his Clay.

Johnny U’s Colts had Broadway Joe’s Jets. Oscar Wilde had his Marquess of Queensbury. Hauptmann had his Lindbergh baby. Kobe had his whirlybird. Carter had his Ayatollah. The Big Bands had their Les Paul guitar. Marie Antoinette had her cake. Caesar had his Brutus. The Wicked Witch of the East had Dorothy’s slippers. And Artie Kumbalek will have his…”

“What the fock, Jimmy. Hey! I get the picture.

“Okey-doke, Artie. See you for the Trick-or-Treat. Later.”

Good lord, October, time to lock the doors, lower the windows and have a nice cocktail, ’cause I’m Art Kumbalek and I told you so.

Photo by RonTech2000/Getty Images.