Sept. 14, 2017 Print Issue

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S E P T E M B E R 14 , 2 0 1 7 | 5

::NEWS&VIEWS FEATURES | POLLS | TAKING LIBERTIES | ISSUE OF THE WEEK

Lawyers Try to Battle Eviction Scourge with Mediation Clinic

very Wednesday afternoon finds Joanne Lipo Zovic and Amy Koltz standing up before the small crowd that gathers at the Milwaukee County Courthouse for eviction court. The two lawyers’ message for both landlords and tenants is a simple one: Before fighting it out in front of a judge, try mediation.

So far, about two-dozen pairs of opposing parties have decided to take them up on their offer.

For a few, the help was to no avail. After trying mediation, they still end up fighting things out in court. But the vast majority managed to find their way to outcomes that are likely far better for everyone concerned than they would have got had they gone through the usual adversarial proceedings. That’s exactly what Lipo Zovic and Koltz hoped for when they started the Tenant-Landlord Mediation Program.

“We have seen this work in small claims and in other cases, with pro se parties in particular,” said Lipo Zovic, who has acted as both a faculty and student adviser in mediation clinics held at the Marquette University Law School. “So why wouldn’t it be effective in another setting?”

Harvard University sociologist Matthew Desmond may have drawn international attention to the scourge of eviction in Milwaukee with the publication last year of his book Evicted: Poverty and Profit in the American City. But Lipo Zovic and Koltz were aware well before all the publicity that the situation had gotten out of hand.

“Sadly, that put us in the headlights nationally,” Lipo Zovic said of Desmond’s book, which followed the struggles of four Milwaukee families and ultimately won a Pulitzer Prize. “That gave some added urgency to the situation.”

Thousands of Cases Each Year

About 13,000 eviction cases were filed in Milwaukee County alone last year. On any given day of the week, it’s not unusual to have more than 100 cases called up. Court commissioners were not only worried that the deluge of cases was leading to outcomes that were in no one’s best interest, they were also concerned that the entire system was being jammed up. Enter Lipo Zovic and Koltz—both of whom have experience working on mediations and other types of alternative dispute resolutions.

Their first mediation clinics dedicated to evictions were single-day affairs held in 2015 and 2016. The success of those events showed the pair how great the demand landlords and tenants might have for their services is. Several court commissioners had also expressed an interest in setting up something similar to an already existing mediation clinic used for small-claims cases. The opportunity came at a good time for Koltz.

Besides teaching classes on mediation as an adjunct professor at Marquette University, Koltz is president of Metro Milwaukee Mediation Services, which seeks to resolve foreclosure cases without the need to go to court. With the economy recovering following the latest recession, she was finding that her work at Metro Milwaukee Mediation Services was starting to taper off. Suddenly, with some monetary support from the Milwaukee County Clerk of Courts, she had found a new outlet for her expertise.

Having got the Tenant-Landlord Mediation Program up and running, Lipo Zovic and Koltz are now able to set aside time to sit in a room with landlords and tenants to try to come up with a resolution that avoids the inevitable entanglements of a court battle. One advantage of mediation, Koltz said, is that it keeps everything private; that’s a contrast from formal eviction proceedings, which generate a mass of paperwork that ends up in the public domain.

Records showing that a tenant has been served an eviction notice can remain on the state’s public website for up to 10 years, putting up a high hurdle to ever being able to rent again.

6 | SEPTEMBER 14, 2017

Sue Hansen

::BY DAN SHAW

Avoiding the Adversary

Another advantage of mediation is in its basic avoidance of adversarial proceedings. When tenants and landlords go to court, they tend to be on the defensive lest any show of weakness give their opponent an opening for an attack.

In mediation—which the parties must enter voluntarily and which produces resolutions that are binding only if accepted by all the parties—they can be much more honest about their own shortcomings.

Sometimes the biggest obstacle is simply a lack of communication. People naturally tend to want to avoid conflict and will go out of their way to avoid disagreeable encounters. Mediation provides a formal setting where the disputants are not only expected to sit across the table from each other, but also behave like adults. Koltz said that a mediator’s mere presence in the room will many times prompt people to look for a rational resolution simply because they want to avoid seeming greedy or obstinate before a stranger. “There’s an element of having a third party there that makes them want to maybe be a little more reasonable,” she said.

Often, once tenants and landlords sit down and start talking things out, it becomes apparent that a way out of their impasse was staring them in the face the entire time. The landlord is tired of trying to collect rent from a tenant whose payments are constantly late; the tenant is tired of being hassled and living in a place he can’t afford and just wants some time to make new arrangements.

“What might make sense to me might not make sense to somebody else,” Lipo Zovic said. “It’s surprising what you get if you let go of all your assumptions.”

To be sure, Koltz said, mediation is not a cure-all. “Sometimes the situation is too personal,” she said. “There is too much history, and there is no turning back in some ways.” When things don’t go right, there are alternative ways to get help. The organization Legal Action of Wisconsin, for instance, has an Eviction Defense Project that helps protect the rights of tenants who cannot afford legal representation. Koltz said that service will always be available to anyone who either outright rejects mediation or isn’t satisfied with its results.

But Joanne Lipo Zovic and Amy Koltz are optimistic enough about mediation that they are looking to add to their services. One possibility is to make themselves available to landlords and tenants before an eviction notice is even filed. The goal here would be to prevent a record of a dispute from ever even appearing in public records. The pair is also thinking about taking their clinic outside the walls of the Milwaukee County Courthouse and setting up shop in other parts of the city on different days of the week. “I would like to see us eventually become mediating itinerants,” Lipo Zovic said.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n

Better Outcomes for Married Couples at the Family Mediation Center ::BY DAN SHAW The Tenant-Landlord Mediation Program is only one effort in Milwaukee at reaching better outcomes through the avoidance of adversarial courtroom proceedings. Last year, the family law attorney Sue Hansen and her partner, Greg Hildebrand, founded the Family Mediation Center to help couples who wanted to get divorced without some of the acrimony that can result when each side hires a lawyer.

Hansen said the inspiration for the center came in part from statistics showing that nearly 70% of the people who are seeking a divorce are trying to get one without any legal help whatsoever. She said couples who head down that route may think they are going to save money; they are also setting themselves up for a load of unintended consequences.

“And then, six months later, they are back in court, arguing over things that didn’t go right the first time,” Hansen said.

Hansen said the Family Mediation Center makes use not just of lawyers who have been trained in mediation, but also family and child psychologists and financial specialists. Mediation starts with a two-hour session for $250; from there, participants can choose from a menu of legal services, allowing them to pay for only what they need or can afford.

“I am a believer [that] the parties need to pay something,” Hansen said.

“It gives them an investment in the process—the sense of responsibility that each person needs to be effective.”

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S E P T E M B E R 14 , 2 0 1 7 | 7

NEWS&VIEWS::FEATURE

New Leadership Comes to an EverChanging East Side ::BY ROB HULLUM

A

Struggling with depression…

Rogers Behavioral Health is currently recruiting individuals, ages 18 to 65, to participate in a clinical research study aimed at reducing the symptoms associated with Major Depressive Disorder. The study, delivered on a smart phone in a controlled setting, includes brief sessions twice per week for four weeks, and participants will receive compensation for time and travel.

To learn more, call 414-865-2600 or visit rogersbh.org/depression-research.

All inquiries are confidential.

This study is funded through private donations to the Rogers Memorial Hospital Foundation.

8 | SEPTEMBER 14, 2017

nother big change recently happened on the East Side.

It wasn’t the announcement of another luxury apartment building testing the limits of Milwaukee’s real estate market, and it didn’t cause the uproar of a nearly four-decades-old beer bar rebranding into a trendy cocktail lounge. But the long-term effects could prove to be much greater and more far-reaching.

Jim Plaisted, who took the reins as the East Side Business Improvement District’s (BID’s) executive director when it formed in 1999, stepped down in July to take the equivalent role at the Historic Third Ward Association.

Kristin Godfrey, a marketing consultant who had previously served on the East Side BID’s board of directors, was announced as his replacement on Wednesday, Aug. 16. This leadership shift in an organization that Plaisted once said “gives strong local control to the commercial district to execute a plan,” could mark a turning point for the East Side at a pivotal time for the area.

The gravity is not lost on Godfrey, who wants to bring a fresh perspective to the position. “Jim has done wonderful things for the East Side, but I’m not trying to repeat what Jim has done,” she said. “He’s already done it and done it really well. I’m trying to go in with my own spin and my own take and develop a role that works for today in 2017, for what the board needs and what the neighborhood needs.”

BIDs are defined by the City of Milwaukee as “strong partners in the city’s efforts to develop strong commercial, residential and industrial areas of the city that create jobs and a higher quality of life in Milwaukee.” The entities are funded and operated by businesses, property owners and community members located within the district.

To Godfrey, this means her job, along with the rest of the board, is to build a support system for East Side businesses and residents through marketing and events initiatives, listening sessions and enhancing the aesthetics of the neighborhood. “A friend of mine joked that I was now the mayor of the East Side,” Godfrey joked. “Though I don’t think that’s my title, it sort of is the responsibility of the BID.” Attracting new businesses to the area

Kristin Godfrey pictured on right

is another big part of what the BID does, and it is increasingly crucial given the number of businesses in the area that have closed in recent years.

Balancing Night and Day in the Neighborhood

Godfrey is well aware of the rumblings— which have in recent months seemed more like roars—that the East Side is “dying.” “I’m so tired of hearing it,” she said. “It’s not! I’m working on the Tomato Romp right now, and we have 10 bars involved that you can go and have a Bloody Mary at. Tell me that that’s not a lot in any other neighborhood.”

While she acknowledges that there were more bars participating in the event in previous years, she says that this is a part of the East Side’s ongoing shift towards a balance of day and night attractions—an initiative that was repeatedly championed by her predecessor.

The change in demographics, housing and types of businesses coming to and leaving the East Side has been the subject of many conversations in Milwaukee recently. Screams of gentrification can be heard from bars to Internet comment threads across the city, but Godfrey sees the response to these changes as overblown.

“I read a negative comment in some article saying that all we’re trying to do is attract young professionals and the money that they have,” she said. “That’s not true. The [new apartment] buildings probably do appeal more to them, but there are people of every age that live there. When people say that the demographics are changing here, my answer would be that they are always changing everywhere.

The Third Ward is changing, and I don’t think people see that as negative. I think it’s just that [the East Side] has been a stalwart for so long that people don’t know what it’s like to watch it change. It feels like your mom is changing.”

While painful for some, to Godfrey the changes are necessary to keep the neighborhood at the forefront of entertainment in the

city. “The East Side has been cool for decades,” she said. “It’s not like other neighborhoods. It’s always been cool, which means it’s always been changing. It’s certainly not the same area that it was 90 years ago, but it was cool then. When we look at what the board wants, it’s that we want that continued evolution that makes sense for the neighborhood—the people that live here and what the city needs as a whole.”

Her vision for the area involves businesses building around their particular niches. A few of the businesses she sees successfully drawing what she calls “niche circles” include The Back Room at Colectivo, The Jazz Estate, Landmark Lanes, Nine Below Mini Golf and the Oriental Theater. “I don’t want to be everything to everyone,” she said. “No business ever wants to do that. But I do want to have a space where many businesses can be what people need, and that’s what I’m looking forward to.”

As of now, the status of North Avenue being a space where many businesses can “be what people need” is up for debate, at least in the nightlife category. The large commercial buildings that housed The Schoolyard, BBC, The Hotel Foster and Rosati’s are all still vacant, and only time can tell if the two new restaurants taking over the spaces left by Rascal’s and The Winchester this month will be successful.

There have been a few small victories in recent months. D.P. Dough, a calzone chain, is planning to open a location at 1515 E. North Ave., across the street from UW-Milwaukee’s Cambridge Commons. Jet’s Pizza, a chain with locations in 20 states, will open at 1857 E. Kenilworth Place, which was most recently occupied by Melthouse Bistro.

For now, Godfrey is focusing on settling into her new role at the helm of a changing neighborhood. “There are definitely things in the works,” Godfrey said. “It’s not just sitting dead, but everything takes time to get the pieces lined up.”

Comment at shepherdexpress.com.

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NEWS&VIEWS::SAVINGOURDEMOCRACY ( SEPT. 14 - SEPT. 20, 2017 )

ach week, the Shepherd Express serves as a clearinghouse for all activities in the greater Milwaukee area that peacefully push back against discriminatory, reactionary or authoritarian actions and policies of the Trump administration and other activities that seek to thwart social justice. We will publicize and promote actions, demonstrations, planning meetings, teach-ins, party-building meetings, drinking-discussion get-togethers or any other actions that are directed toward fighting back to preserve our liberal democratic system.

Saturday, Sept. 16

Voter and Civic Engagement Campaign @ Acción Ciudadana de Wisconsin (221 S. Second St.), 10 a.m.-1 p.m.

Acción Ciudadana de Wisconsin, Latino Voting Bloc of Wisconsin and Citizen Action of Wisconsin have come together to organize a weekly Saturday campaign of knocking on doors and phone banking to get people thinking about the 2018 elections. Volunteers can go out and talk to voters about the issues that they care about and get them involved in different events happening in the community.

Fighting Bob Fest @ Tripoli Shrine Center (3000 W. Wisconsin Ave.), 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

Fighting Bob Festival celebrates progressive politics and the legacy of “Fighting Bob” La Follette—a progressive politician who served as Governor of Wisconsin 1901-1906. Admission is free and donations are welcome.

Peace Action Wisconsin: Stand for Peace @ The corner of Locust St. and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Drive, noon-1 p.m.

Deputy director of the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists Marina Walker Guevara will discuss her role in coordinating the efforts of journalists from 80 countries in the Pulitzer Prize-winning investigation, “The Panama Papers.”

What Can You Do About Climate Change? @ Milwaukee Public Library (814 W. Wisconsin Ave.), 6-7:30 p.m.

During this event, Associate Professor of Atmospheric and Oceanic Sciences at the UW-Madison Ankur Desai will present some of the basics of climate change and some of UW-Madison’s research on impacts of climate change to Wisconsin forests and wetlands.

‘Milwaukee 53206’ Community Screening @ Shorewood High School (1701 E. Capitol Drive), 6:30-8 p.m.

Kingo Lutheran Church, Shorewood Senior Resource Center, Shorewood Public Library and the Shorewood School District teamed up to present a free community screening of Milwaukee 53206, a film that examines the high toll mass incarceration takes on individuals and families that make-up the community.

Every Saturday from noon-1 p.m., concerned citizens join with Peace Action Wisconsin to protest war. Signs will be provided for those who need them. Protesters are encouraged to stick around for conversation and coffee afterward.

Wednesday, Sept. 20

Laughing Liberally @ ComedySportz Theater (420 S. First St.), 8 p.m.

Every Wednesday, Bounce Milwaukee offers a space to organize (and a free drink to anyone who brings evidence of resistance action in the past week—including protest signs, emails to elected officials or a selfie at the capital).

Laughing Liberally is a progressive comedy show held monthly at Comedy Sportz Theater. Matthew Filipowicz, whose work has been featured on CNN, NPR, PBS, HBO, BBC and other notable outlets, hosts it. This month’s comedians include Josh Ballew, Bekah Cosgrove, Richard Thomas, Jen Durbent, Chastity Washington and sketch comedy group The Accountants Of Homeland Security. Astar Herndon, Wisconsin state director of 9 to 5, will also speak.

Tuesday, Sept. 19

‘The Panama Papers’ Burleigh Media Ethics Lecture @ Marquette University Alumni Memorial Union (1442 W. Wisconsin Ave.), 4-6 p.m.

Refuel the Resistance @ Bounce Milwaukee (2801 S. Fifth Court), 5-8 p.m.

Open Housing: The Suburban Challenge Then & Now @ Unitarian Universalist Church West (13001 W. North Ave., Brookfield), 7-8:30 p.m.

This “200 Nights of Freedom” event honors the 50th anniversary of the Open Housing Marches.

Admission is free, though a freewill offering is requested for the YWCA Social Justice Leadership Camp for Girls and ACLU Youth Leadership Program.

To submit to this column, please send a brief description of your action, including date and time, to savingourdemocracy@shepex.com. Together, we can fight to minimize the damage that the Trump administration has planned for our great country.

Comment at shepherdexpress. com.

NEWS&VIEWS ::FEATURE

Conservatory Instrumental in School Music Education ::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN

“S

tudents

in

throughout

schools Milwau-

kee—in MPS, choice, charter

and

private

schools—lack the in-

struments they need to pursue their musical dreams,” says Adam Shafer, director of development at the Wisconsin Conservatory of Music. Budget cuts in education have diminished school music programs and, specifically, made it difficult for many schools to supply their students with musical instruments.

The impact is especially hard on schools serving poorer households.

To address the problem, the Conservatory, which has a long history of educating aspiring musicians of all ages, is launching an Instrument Drive, collecting used instruments to distribute to children and schools in need.

“When neither school or family have the resources, the child no longer has the ability to participate in band and orchestra programs, programs which impact their intellectual, personal, familial and communal strengths,” Shafer continues. “The Instrument Drive is designed to meet this need by seeking instruments that are hidden away in closets, sitting in an attic or simply ready for a new home. An instrument is more powerful in the hands of a child than one that is sitting in a closet.”

Students, families and schools needing instruments will be able to submit applications. “The Conservatory will award instruments to the applicants based on need and inventory availability,” Shafer says.

The Conservatory’s Instrument Drive is scheduled for Sept. 22-24. For drop-off sites and more information on the drive, visit wcmusic.org/instrument-drive.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com.

10 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

NEWS&VIEWS::TAKINGLIBERTIES

A Perfect Storm of Bad Republican Policies

to describe numerous, simultaneous events feeding upon one another to create massive damage far beyond anything seen previously. That seems appropriate to describe a combination of American catastrophes that includes unprecedented devastation from back-to-back hurricanes.

But Republican denial of global warming that creates weather extremes and their rolling back of environmental protections aren’t the party’s only zombie chickens staggering home to roost.

Other destructive party policies deserving burial include underfunding necessary government services and threatening to intentionally create economic disaster by defaulting on their country’s financial obligations.

::BY JOEL MCNALLY

W

hen you’re a Republican U.S. senator voting against flood assistance as millions of Americans flee for their lives from catastrophic hurricanes, you have to be an awfully glib politician to fabricate a plausible excuse. And when you’re the U.S. president intentionally destroying a federal program protecting young people who’ve grown up in this country from deportation to another country they’ve never known, don’t bother adding to the stream of lies you’ve already told about immigrants.

Wisconsin Sen. Ron Johnson and Donald Trump made some pretty pathetic attempts to defend their own indefensible actions in the midst of a raging, perfect storm of catastrophic Republican policies. A “perfect storm” is the term used

Let’s Deport High Achievers Adding to the national chaos, Donald Trump gratuitously tossed into the mix more Republican appeals to racism and hatred of immigrants by announcing his decision to end a humanitarian program protecting from deportation a large number of high-achieving young people who grew up as Americans in immigrant families.

The so-called “dreamers” are virtually indistinguishable from any other children who grew up in America, unless you’re a racist who considers them color-coded. They were brought to the U.S. by undocumented parents as babies, toddlers or very young children through no decision of their own.

President Barack Obama’s Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) allowed nearly

800,000 of these young people to receive renewable work permits and access to higher education. All Americans benefitted as the result of more young people achieving success and contributing to their country’s economy.

It’s a toss-up which Republican twisted himself into the most grotesque knots trying to justify their horrific political actions: Johnson explaining why he voted against desperately needed flood assistance, or Trump declaring his “love” for the dreamers as he ended their protection against deportation, and access to decent jobs and education. Johnson receives special recognition for claiming his vote not to help those devastated by floods was a protest against preventing Republicans like himself from threatening to destroy the American economy. Johnson said he would have voted for flood assistance “in a heartbeat”—even though he didn’t.

Johnson said he was mad the vote also included raising the debt ceiling to allow the government to pay its economic obligations. Of course, it would be insane for the U.S. government to default on paying its bills causing the stock market to crash and wrecking the U.S. economy. But that hasn’t stopped tea party Republicans like Johnson from regularly threatening to force a government default to extort more extreme right-wing legislation.

So, get that? Johnson voted against assisting flooded-out Americans because he was angry he wouldn’t get a chance to vote to destroy the U.S. economy.

Trump’s public excuses for cruelly destroying DACA were especially ludicrous coming from a president famous for advocating unconstitutional, discriminatory policies. He claimed he

was forced to kill DACA because he was afraid it might be declared unconstitutional if it were challenged in court. Then, he sent out Attorney General Jeff Sessions, whose shady, racist past is well-known, to falsely claim DACA caused “a surge of minors at the southern border” and “denied jobs to hundreds of thousands of Americans by allowing those same illegal aliens to take those jobs.”

Trump claimed he wanted Congress to pass legislation protecting dreamers brought here as children. That’s easy for Republicans to say when they don’t really expect a Republican-controlled Congress to do it. But, what if Trump was actually telling the truth for a change? Trump just wants to “win” by getting legislation passed, and Republicans aren’t very good at that. Trump just sided with Democratic leadership to pass the bill providing flood assistance—combined with raising the national debt limit to avoid government default that angered Johnson.

If Trump regularly joined with Democrats and moderate Republicans (he’d only need two dozen moderates out of 241 Republicans in the House and three Republican Senators), he could pass so much legislation he’d get tired of winning. Of course, Trump would have to quit trying to appeal to white supremacists, but he has always been able to reverse political positions on a dime.

Our childlike Republican president could pass a lot more legislation benefitting the American people than the party’s current leadership that is still stuck with defending a swirling storm of bad Republican policies that have millions of Americans fleeing for their lives.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n

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NEWS&VIEWS::POLL

You Say Trump’s DACA Decision Was Cruel Last week we asked if, despite his rhetoric about handling the issue “with heart and compassion,” Donald Trump’s decision to undo Obama’s Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) executive order was his cruelest executive order. You said: Yes: 65% No: 35%

What Do You Say? Did climate change play a significant role in this year’s unusually severe hurricane season?

Yes No Vote online at shepherdexpress.com. We’ll publish the results of this poll in next week’s issue.

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Bring Our Youth Home from Lincoln Hills and Copper Lake ::BY JEFFERY ROMAN

W

e’ve all been distressed by the news coming out of Lincoln Hills School for Boys and Copper Lake School for Girls, Wisconsin’s two youth prisons that are currently under federal investigation. The minors in custody there have reported being abused, injured, pepper sprayed, locked in solitary confinement for great lengths of time and sexually assaulted.

Yet the state has done little to nothing to change its approach to youth incarceration. Its only real reforms have resulted from an order from a federal judge, who wrote that Ted Kaczynski, the infamous Unabomber who’s incarcerated in a Supermax prison, “has less restrictive confinement” than the young people in Lincoln Hills.

While many have commented on the steady stream of revelations from Lincoln Hills and Copper Lake, some important voices are routinely left out of the conversation: those of the children that have returned from Lincoln Hills and Copper Lake, along with their families and community members. That’s why we formed Youth Justice Milwaukee and are calling for the shutdown of Lincoln Hills and Copper Lake, which comprise the largest youth prison campus in the country. We want to bring our youth home so that they can receive comprehensive care in the community and change their lives for the better instead of being abused or exposed to abuse.

Comprehensive care close to home is a viable alternative to youth prisons. For example, Running Rebels is already providing intensive monitoring of chronic youth offenders so that they learn how to change their behavior. These are the kinds of programs we could expand or adapt for our young people. What our coalition knows—and what we’ve learned from data and examples from around the country—is that youth prisons don’t work.

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Youth prisons don’t make our communities safer because they cause irreparable psychological and social damage to adolescent growth and development. A full 61% of formerly incarcerated youth in Wisconsin commit new crimes within three years of their release, showing that they were not rehabilitated while in custody. In contrast, community programs offer opportunities for change. A national study

by John Jay Research and Evaluation found that six to 12 months after discharge from a community-based program, 87% of youth were still living in the community and 95% were not in secure placement.

Youth prisons perpetuate racial and ethnic disparities by locking up disproportionately more African American and Latino youth than their white peers. This, in turn, feeds Wisconsin’s adult prison system, which, at 12.8%, has the highest incarceration rate for

black men in the country—almost twice the national average.

Youth prisons are expensive. It costs taxpayers more than $100,000 per year to place one youth at Lincoln Hills or Copper Lake; Milwaukee County spends $300 per day for each youth in custody there. This is money that could be better spent on a system that rehabilitates youth offenders.

Wisconsin should follow the lead of other jurisdictions around the country that have shut down their youth prisons and invested in community-based alternatives. Thanks to the work of committed attorneys, activists, families and elected leaders, youth prisons have been shuttered in California, Louisiana, Mississippi, New York, Texas and Washington, D.C., with positive results: Most of these states have seen a drop in costs and recidivism rates after closing their youth prisons and investing in alterna-

tive community-based solutions.

Youth Justice Milwaukee has launched an online petition at change.org calling on Gov. Scott Walker—who hasn’t toured either of the youth prisons under his control—and state legislators to shut down Lincoln Hills and Copper Lake. We’re asking for your support.

It’s time to fundamentally change Wisconsin’s juvenile justice system by bringing our youth home and investing in community-based alternatives that will make our communities safer and change young people’s lives for the better.

Jeffery Roman, benchmark coordinator for Community Advocates Public Policy Institute’s Milwaukee Brighter Futures Program, is a founding member of Youth Justice Milwaukee (youthjusticemke.org).

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On The Way Café

Healthy, Organic Options Abound at On The Way Café

“Anybody can put butter and cream into something and make it taste good, so to start with the parameters we have and make something healthy and delicious, it’s more of a challenge and you have to be good at it,” he said.

Perlstein and his team make rotating soups and chili, and coleslaw and potato salad that changes daily. “We try to make coleslaw vegan so our vegan customers have a side they can get. Today we have a curry coleslaw,” he said.

Perlstein wants to assure people that “healthy” doesn’t mean just tofu and sprouts. While On The Way Café is vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free friendly, it’s not an exclusively vegetarian restaurant. Meat lovers will find grass-fed and freerange beef, lamb or turkey burgers, served on flavorful sprouted grain buns. ::BY SHEILA JULSON Bowls feature a veggie of the day mixed with a grain. A recent choice included green beans with chopped, sautéed carrot tops. One of Perlstein’s latest passions n The Way Café is the brainchild of Jill Check, a natural health has been reducing food waste. “I’m horrified by how much food people throw professional and busy mom of six who saw a hole in the market when it came to finding healthy, organic restaurant and away,” he said. “I recently used beet tops as greens, and they were really good.”

Pastry Chef Anita Su Jiivana crafts raw and vegan desserts, substituting ingredicarryout food. This past February, Check opened On The ents like nuts and coconut for grains or dairy. Her key lime pie is a hit; the café goes Way Café, an upscale establishment that’s counter serthrough several per week. Dessert samples are offered, and plenty of non-vegans vice, but classy. Customers dining in or ordering carryhave been won over by her sweet treats. out can choose from a broad menu featuring organic, Scratch-made smoothies and juices each have a crazy healthy assortment of non-GMO and antibiotic-free breakfast items, soups, produce and herbs. Perlstein and Co-Manager Dynami Alsalads, sandwiches, burgers, bowls, Anjeri put together an organic beer and wine program. The desserts, smoothies and juices, café holds an on-sale and off-sale license so people can enjoy and organic beer, wine and cider. a beer or glass of wine with their meal, or buy a bottle of wine This past summer, Chef Steve and take it home with their take-out order. Customers will find Perlstein joined On The Way Café On the Way Café Lakefront beer, Island Orchard Cider and organic wines includas co-general manager and partner.

6005 W. Mequon Road, ing Pablo Claro, Ramsay, Copla red or white sangria and more.

Perlstein always had an interest in Mequon Always looking ahead, Perlstein is hard at work on new culinary arts but pursued journalism after menu items and a catering menu. On The Way Café was high school. After 18 years as a reporter, he 262-302-4492 | $-$$ one of the vendors for sustainable music festival Rock the switched gears and in 2002 he graduated from Le ontheway.cafe Green, and they’ve established relationships with local Cordon Bleu College of Culinary Arts in Chicago. He worked Handicapped access: Yes gyms to provide a nutrition component for members. They for restaurateurs including Bartolotta Restaurants and SURG CC, OD, GF host wine diners and partner with nonprofits including The Restaurant Group. He also owned Simmer Catering. As a classiHours: M-F 10 a.m.-8 p.m., Hunger Task Force. cally trained chef, Perlstein was intrigued by the challenges of For more information, visit ontheway.cafe. working with clean, healthy foods.

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Street Eats’ Last Huzzah of Summer: The Craft Brewery Edition ::BY SELENA MILEWSKI

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TREET EATS, the Shepherd Express’ popular mobile food festival, closes its summer season with a last huzzah this Friday, Sept. 15. The event takes place from 4-8 p.m. in beautiful Catalano Square, located between Menomonee, Erie and Young streets in the Historic Third Ward.

This time around, the fest takes the theme “Milwaukee Craft Brewery League Tap Takeover,” meaning attendees can enjoy beers from five acclaimed local breweries, along with a wide selection of food. As event coordinator Rachel Repetti states, “Milwaukee’s craft beer culture is surging. With the help of the Milwaukee Craft Brewery League, we are able to showcase some of the best brewers in the city, alongside our signature food truck event.”

Participating breweries are Broken Bat, serving their apricot pale ale Straight Ahead Chedd, and Corre Corre, a Mexican lager infused with lime; District 14, serving ChocoMatic LoveMachine, a dark chocolate ale, along with Happy Hippie Hwheat, an American wheat beer; Mobcraft, pouring their coffee brown ale Bat$h!t Crazy, and Oddball, a Kölsch style ale; St. Francis Brewery, serving their German Weissbier “Lust,” along with Munich Dunkel; and Explorium Brewpub pouring their Oktoberfest and Cherry Chocolate Stout.

Make it a meal with food from an impressive array of local food vendors, including: ChillWaukee, Drift, Gypsy Soul, Hardwood Café, Ian’s Pizza, Jamaica Kitchen, Jericho’s BBQ, Marco Pollo, Pedro’s South American Food, Pig Tailz, Press (Belgian Liege Waffles), Punjabi Accent, Rich’s House of Cakes, Rolling Cones Food Truck, Shawarma House, Street-Za Pizza, Taqueria La Guacamaya, Tasty Café, The Fatty Patty, Tudo Sabor Brasil and Yellowbellies.

Everdry Waterproofing, Sherper’s and Wiener Winks will also be onsite for attendees’ shopping pleasure. Entertainment comes in the form of a 4-8 p.m. set from the J. Ryan Trio, a Milwaukee band specializing in soulful jazz standards and down-home blues. The group features Alissa Weber, who has received multiple nominations for Best Female Vocalist in the Shepherd’s Best of Milwaukee contest.

All tips for the band and bar will go to support Milwaukee Homeless Veterans Initiative.

The event is free and open to the public, with food available for purchase with cash, and in some cases, credit card. Beer tickets can be purchased on the day of the event with one ticket good for one drink. Single tickets are $6 each or two tickets for $10.

To learn more about the Milwaukee Craft Brewery League Tap Takeover Street Eats, visit shepherdexpress.com/streeteatsseptember.

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ho can resist an array of attractively presented sweet treats? Dawn Davis of Dawn’s Yummy Delights knows that people often eat with their eyes first, and has thus mastered the art of presentation when creating her scratch-made pound cakes, peach cobbler, banana pudding, brownies, candied nuts and more for crowds at farmers markets and events.

Davis has enjoyed baking since childhood, and many of her baked goods are her grandmother’s recipes. Davis’ mother, Yvonne, owned a beauty salon during the 1990s. Davis helped her part-time and also made lunches every Saturday to serve to the customers. “I really liked doing the desserts,� she said.

As a single mom raising two sons, Christopher and Alexander, Davis studied business and culinary arts and pastry at Milwaukee Area Technical College and Cardinal Stritch University. She held various jobs while making desserts on the side.

Davis took an early retirement and moved back to Wisconsin about four years ago to help take care of her mother, and she decided to turn her passion for desserts into a fulltime business. Davis does all the baking, and Christopher, Alexander and Yvonne help with market tasks and labeling product. Davis’ offerings are vast, and she usually has a few different items at every market or event. A recent visit featured goodies such as tangy, rich lemon pound cake, peach cobbler, banana pudding and Grammy’s Kandied Nuts, a delightfully sweet and salty, crunchy pecan that is great as a snack or as topping for sweet or savory dishes.

The “brookies,� a brownie-cookie with chocolate ganache topping, is usually a hit with customers, Davis said. Some of the brookies are topped with caramel and toffee. Autumn brings sweet potato pie and sweet potato bread, and strawberry bread is available in early summer. In addition to using many family recipes, she looks at other recipes and tweaks them to make them her own.

Davis also makes some savory items, such as chicken pot pie and garlic cheesy bread.

She watches trends and pays attention to what people seem to like. In camaraderie with other food and produce producers, Davis gets ingredients such as strawberries locally whenever possible. Another vendor with whom she connected is helping her obtain pecans grown closer to home. She sourced pecans from local farms while living in Arizona.

Baked goods are packaged and sold in attractive individual-size servings, and customers can sample before buying. Davis makes party trays and caters treats for events. She also does custom sweet treat wedding favors (but not wedding cakes).

Although gluten-free and vegan items are in heavy demand these days, Davis observes that diabetics seem to have limited choices when it comes to desserts. She plans to add some diabetic-friendly items to her line of treats. She also hopes to open a cafĂŠ or food truck to offer coffee and desserts.

Dawn’s Yummy Delights can be found at farmers markets including the Garden District, Cedarburg, Whitefish Bay and Enderis Park. Davis has been to the Outpost Makers Market at Wellness Commons, and she’s working on lining up fall and winter festivals and events. For upcoming events or to place orders, search “Dawn’s Yummy Delights, LLC� on Facebook.

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::SPORTS Brewers Within Two Games of First Place

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Best of Milwaukee 2016 WINNER

ith one glaring exception, it was a pretty good weekend for the Milwaukee Brewers.

Their sweep in Chicago erased memories of getting swept in Cincinnati and brought them back within two games of first place in the NL Central for the first time in about three weeks. Given their success, it’s hard not to wonder how good they could have been if they’d gotten full, healthy seasons from Junior Guerra, Chase Anderson and now Jimmy Nelson.

On Friday night, Nelson became the third Brewers pitcher in 2017 to injure himself on offense. His awkward slide back into first base following a single off of the wall at Wrigley Field resulted in multiple shoulder injuries—most notably a partially torn labrum. His season is over at this point, and it remains unclear if he will need surgery that could limit his availability in 2018.

As is always the case, a pitcher of Nelson’s caliber getting injured while batting led to an immediate knee-jerk reaction from fans and pundits alike who want to see Major League Baseball expand the designated hitter rule to both leagues. But on the flip side, one could just as easily use Nelson’s injury to make the case for abolishing the rule altogether—at all levels of baseball.

Consider Nelson’s case once again. Nelson

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made his collegiate debut as a freshman with Alabama in 2008, was drafted by the Brewers in 2010 and reached the AA level with Huntsville in 2012. For nearly five full years, he played in leagues that employ the designated hitter rule, and as such he made zero collegiate or professional plate appearances over that time. At the AA and AAA levels of the minors, pitchers are allowed to hit—but only in games featuring two teams that are both affiliated with National League clubs.

Nelson made just six plate appearances with Huntsville in 2012, 33 more in 2013 and 25 in 2014. Having barely swung a bat for seven years, it was hardly surprising that he struggled to hit advanced pitching. At the time of his call-up in 2014, Nelson was 0-for59 at the plate as a professional. As a major leaguer, he has reached base safely just 23 times in five seasons, posting a .103 batting average with a .122 on-base percentage and .114 slugging.

Awkward at the Plate?

Major League Baseball features, as you might imagine, the best pitchers in the world.

The vast majority of all professional position players struggle to hit advanced pitching despite working on it every day. It should come as no shock, then, that young MLB pitchers are poorly equipped to succeed at the plate after barely swinging a bat a handful of times in the minors. All the way up the ladder, the people in charge of their development have nearly completely neglected to prepare them for this element of the game. It’s even worse for pitchers developed by AL teams: Zach Davies, drafted by the Orioles, had a total of nine professional at bats before joining the Brewers in 2015.

The issue, however, is not just that pitchers are ineffective at the plate: It’s that they’re awkward. Consider Lewis Brinson for a moment. Over his six professional seasons, he’s reached base 840 times. Nelson, by contrast, has gotten a hit or drawn a walk 26 times over that same timeframe (and not once in the five years before). Is it any wonder that Brinson and other developing position players know how to perform a headfirst slide without injuring themselves, but Nelson didn’t?

Nelson’s injury is a convenient opportunity for those with an anti-DH agenda to seize the conversation. It’s true that if pitchers didn’t hit, they wouldn’t face this risk of injury. If baseball eliminated the DH and taught young pitchers to hit and run the bases, however, perhaps sending them to the plate wouldn’t be so risky.

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MILWAUKEE CRAFT BREWERY LEAGUE TAP TAKEOVER

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WILD SPACE DANCE COMPANY PRESENTS ‘ARTIFACTS’ AT RIVERWEST’S GOAT PALACE ::BY JOHN SCHNEIDER

S

20 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

et back from the road and hidden by tall bushes, The Goat Palace on North Fratney Street in Riverwest calls no attention to itself. I drove by several times before I took a chance and turned into its long driveway, barely able to believe this was the site where choreographer Debra Loewen was about to create a major dance performance with her Wild Space Dance Company. She’d warned me in advance that this year’s site-specific show would contrast greatly with last year’s exploration of the gorgeous gardens of the Villa Terrace Decorative Arts Museum. Indeed, The Goat Palace is an undecorated white barn-like building with a loading dock in front and a garage in back, set in a flat grassy yard with a working fire pit in what was once a small manufacturing neighborhood just below Capital Drive.

Carl Nillsen, owner of the adjacent Flux Design building and brand-new brewpub on the corner of Fratney and Vienna streets, recently purchased the property. To its south, along the cracked pavement of Fratney, is a warehouse long ago transformed into artists’ studios and whimsically named The Nut Factory. Perhaps inspired by that moniker, Nillsen called his new acquisition The Goat Palace.

Built in 1920 for manufacturing, no goat has set hoof there—until Loewen’s show, that is.

Nillsen plans to make it an event space, a party palace for concerts, theater, weddings and such. It can hold several hundred. He envisions a future Riverwest creative arts district here. Director Leda Hoffmann’s Luminous Theatre staged a play in the building last spring. Now Loewen, as she does in all her site-specific work, will use the building and grounds as an inspiration and partial subject for dance theater.

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She’s titled the new show Artifacts because Nillsen currently uses the building as a kind of attic for his many odd collectibles.

The dancers will incorporate and respond to them as the cultural items of unknown origin that they are. For example, a moveable hairdresser’s station will serve as a traveling stage for an invented diorama; a life-size blow-up doll will have a role in a scene in a pick-up truck; a collection of small bee transport cages inspired a dance. And there’s hand-crafted goat art.

“There’s a culture of artmaking in this part of town,” Loewen said. “Someone said to me that the Villa Terrace piece was the have-done and this Riverwest piece is the can-do. I thought, oh yeah!”

At the start of the performance, the audience will divide into three groups, each located in a separate area. Outdoors, one group will view an indoor scene through the loading dock doors while another surrounds the pick-up truck where guest artists Lindsey Ruenger and Steven Zarzecki will have a duet. A third group, seated in the rear garage, will see a dance in the driveway.

The groups will rotate until each has viewed all three enactments, then join to enter the main building for a last garage scene before moving into the high-ceilinged central hall where a curtain will rise on a dance to live music.

Five simultaneous repeating events will follow in the building’s side bays, including the traveling hairdresser station. They can be viewed in any sequence, repeatedly if desired, for as long as the interlude lasts. One scene, directed by UW-Milwaukee associate theater professor Tony Horne, can only be viewed through peepholes in a cardboard wall. Another presents Wild Space dancers as human goats with bells. Another presents, yes, live goats.

“This is a Goat Palace. I couldn’t run away from that,” Loewen said. “I looked for goats. I went to county fairs but when you talk to people there about a dance with goats they just look at you. But I finally found someone who does goat yoga—Abigail Lippmann from Oak Hollow Acres in Burlington. They have yoga outside on the grass and she brings little dwarf goats, and while you’re doing downward dog they might jump on your back. I think it’s meant to make you smile. I knew it was an East Coast thing but it’s new in Burlington. I told her she might find some contacts here since yoga people come to dance concerts. I needed little goats that aren’t going to try to jump out of the pen and that are used to being held or touched. She’s Wild Space bringing them.”

Dance Artifacts will end outdoors beneath Company the night sky in the pastoral yard Artifacts around a lighted bonfire. “There’s someSept. 14-17 thing so beautiful about just having the The Goat Palace audience come together at the end of something,” Loewen said. She knows that well because she’s been making site-specific works for 30 years, since before they were widely accepted. Her shows aren’t novelties.

They’re the products of a dedicated life in art, her masterpieces.

Performances are at 7:15 p.m., Sept. 14-17 at The Goat Palace, 3740 N. Fratney St. Seating is limited; advance ticket purchase is strongly recommended. Call 414-271-0712 or visit wildspacedance.org.

Update regarding last week’s A&E Gateway on Milwaukee High School of the Arts: Shortly after he was interviewed by the Shepherd, Barry Applewhite was replaced by Larry Farris as principal.

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S E P T E M B E R 14 , 2 0 1 7 | 21

::THISWEEKINMILWAUKEE THURSDAY, SEPT. 14

X w/ Skating Polly @ Turner Hall Ballroom, 8 p.m.

New York may have been the hub of the American punk scene in the genre’s early years, but X proved that Los Angeles had something to bring to the table, too. The group toasted the city on their iconic 1980 album Los Angeles, and after all these decades, it still remains near and dear to their hearts. Last year, singer-songwriter John Doe released a book about the music scene that spawned them called Under The Big Black Sun: A Personal History of L.A. Punk.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 15

Grand Opening Weekend @ The Crimson Club

West Allis has quite a few bars, but not many that meet the conventional definition of “upscale.” Officially opening this weekend at 7211 W. Greenfield Ave., The Crimson Club hopes to change that, with its modern décor and its emphasis on dance music and craft cocktails. West Allis Mayor Dan Devine will host a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the venue at 3 p.m. on Friday, which will be followed by food and drink specials starting at 6 p.m. that night. Then on Saturday, the venue will throw an official party beginning at 8 p.m., complete with a red carpet and a champagne toast.

Tattoo Arts Convention @ Wisconsin Center, 2 p.m.

Rainer Maria w/ Olivia Neutron-John @ The Back Room at Colectivo, 8 p.m.

More than 300 tattoo artists will swing through Milwaukee this weekend as part of the traveling Tattoo Arts Convention, now appearing for its eighth year in Wisconsin. Among the artists tattooing throughout the weekend will be veterans of the Spike TV series “Ink Master,” as well as the shows “Best Ink,”“Tattoo Nightmares” and “Black Ink Crew.” There will also be more than 25 categories of tattoo contests, displays of tattoo collectibles and memorabilia and performances from burlesque artists and carnival sideshow acts. (Also 11 a.m., Sept. 16 and 17.)

John Mulaney @ The Riverside Theater, 7 and 9:30 p.m.

Hari Kondabolu @ The Underground Collaborative, 7:30 and 9:30 p.m.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 15 One of the most notable emo bands ever to spring from Wisconsin, the Madison-born trio Rainer Maria made an immediate impression with their emotionally volatile, lyrically precise take on the genre. Like nearly all acts from their scene around the turn of the century, they’ve since reunited, but unlike most of those acts, they actually have a genuinely worthwhile new album to show for it. Rather than trying to relive past glories, this year’s S/T (not “self-titled,” just S/T) is the work of a harder, heavier incarnation of the band. It’s one of the year’s most satisfying rock records.

As a writer on “Saturday Night Live,” John Mulaney quickly established himself as one of the show’s most valuable behind-the-scenes players, co-creating Bill Hader’s “Weekend Update” nightlife correspondent, Stefon. Since then, Mulaney has emerged from the writers’ room to claim the spotlight for himself with some well-regarded stand-up specials.

Even the disastrous, short-lived Fox sitcom “Mulaney”—a loose “Seinfeld” rip that starred Mulaney as a lightly fictionalized version of himself—did little to hurt his standing in the comedy world.

Greta Van Fleet w/ Welles @ The Rave, 8 p.m.

What a difference a great frontman can make. With his kinetic moves and magnificent wail, Joshua Kiszka has helped make his Michigan-born band Greta Van Fleet one of the most buzzed-about young bands in hard rock. Joined in the band by his brother Samuel on bass and keyboards and his brother Jacob on guitar, as well as drummer Daniel Wagner, he rips through four wild songs on their group’s new EP, Black Smoke Rising, released this spring. The hype around the band has been so great that they’ve sold out every show on their latest tour—including this one at the Rave.

Plenty of comics draw inspiration from current events, but politics loom especially large over the work of standup Hari Kondabolu. A former intern for Hillary Clinton during her days in the senate, Kondabolu rose to prominence with his politically charged routines. Titled for the year it’s predicted that white Americans will be a statistical minority in the United States, his debut album, Waiting for 2042, touched on subjects all too familiar in progressive circles, such as friends threatening to move to Canada if they don’t get their political way and the unrealistic expectations that surrounded Barack Obama. (You can read our latest interview with Kondabolu at shepherdexpress.com.)

Hari Kondabolu PHOTO BY MINDY TUCKER

SATURDAY, SEPT. 16 Bay View Bash @ Kinnickinnic Avenue

Greta Van Fleet

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It’s a testament to Bay View residents’ enthusiasm for their neighborhood that each year so many of them get together as volunteers to put on the Bay View Bash, a sprawling street festival that runs a good stretch of Kinnickinnic Avenue. Attractions at the festival’s five stages this year include strong man competition, belly dancing, the Milwaukee Flyers tumbling team and music from acts that include NO/NO, Metal Men, Chief, Abbey Jeanne, Twin Brother, Paladino and Slow Walker. With more than 140 vendors lined up, this is a great chance to familiarize yourself with the neighborhood’s many local businesses.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Read our daily events guide, Today in Milwaukee, on shepherdexpress.com

PRESENTIN G SPONSORS BOB AND JENNY HILLIS,

In honor of Bob and Genie Friedman

WMSE 91.7 FM PRESENTS

BIG BAND GRANDSTAND WITH DEWEY GILL

MONDAY, SEPT. 18

The Flaming Lips w/ Mac DeMarco @ The Rave, 7 p.m.

THE TOMMY DORSEY ORCHESTRA

After the fluke success of their 1994 single “She Don’t Use Jelly,” The Flaming Lips emerged as one of the few bands of the alternative-rock era to reinvent themselves for indie-rock audiences by using their major-label budget to create lavish and uplifting experimental rock albums, like 1999’s The Soft Bulletin and 2002’s Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots and earning a reputation for their celebratory, prop-heavy live shows. Even as that band has explored darker, more psychedelic territory on their most recent albums, they’ve retained their trademark sense of mischief.

They’ll share this show with a younger peer with his own distinctive sense of humor: Canadian oddball rocker Mac DeMarco, who released his third album, This Old Dog, this spring.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 3 AT 4 PM

Human Heat w/ Norwegian Arms @ Company Brewing, 9 p.m.

TURNER HALL BALLROOM | 1034 N. 4TH ST.

As the songwriter behind the Brooklyn indie-rock band Yellow Ostrich, Alex Schaaf specialized in blistering guitars, odd noises and twisty tunes. It was busy, dynamic music. With his latest project, Human Heat, Schaaf goes for something much more even-tempered. Mixed and mastered by Bon Iver producer Zach Hanson at Justin Vernon’s April Base studio in Northern Wisconsin, Human Heat’s just-released debut full-length All Is Too Much offers a warm canvas of synthesizers and smooth, R&B-inspired rhythms, with shades of Dirty Projectors and James Blake. It’s far removed from the quirk-rock of Yellow Ostrich, but Schaaf wears this sophisticated sound well.

Featuring Milwaukee Youth Symphony Orchestra

- TICKETS ON SALE NOW AT PABSTTHEATER.ORG OR (414) 286-3663 -

TUESDAY, SEPT. 19 Oh Sees w/ The Hussy and Solid Freex @ Turner Hall Ballroom, 8 p.m.

Aside from band leader John Dwyer, the only constant across Thee Oh Sees’ dozens of releases has been change. Over the years, the comically prolific band has evolved from an experimental folk act into an inventive psych-rock act and, on recent albums, a stoner-rock powerhouse. Even the band’s name has changed. This year, Dwyer announced not one but two band name changes: They became simply Oh Sees for their most recent album, Orc, released just this summer; but not weeks later they rebranded themselves OCS in anticipation of yet another new album, Memory of a Cut Off Head, due in November, which returns Dwyer and company to the intimate folk of their very earliest releases. Which version of the band will show up for this show? We can honestly say we have no idea.

Oh Sees

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QUIET CLUBBING FRI, SEPT 15 S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 23

A&E::PERFORMINGARTSWEEK

THEATRE

MUSIC

Guys and Dolls

Haydn, Brahms, Lajtha Trios

The backstory to the original Broadway production

of Frank Loesser, Jo Swerling and Abe Burrows’ great American musical Guys and Dolls reminds us that political interference in artistic expression is nothing new. The 1950 musical won the Tony Award for Best Musical and was the winner of a Pulitzer Prize for drama. Unfortunately, coauthor Burrows was a target of the notorious witch hunting of the so-called House Un-American Activities Committee (HUAC); the win was nullified. Thankfully, the musical has far outlasted the “scandal.”

Many may conjure the superb 1955 film version of Guys and Dolls starring Jean Simmons, Vivian Blaine, Marlon Brando and Frank Sinatra. The latter would make the musical’s most memorable number, “Luck Be a Lady,” a hit song and highlight of his live concerts for decades to come. Cast albums and revivals of Guys and Dolls abound, and the musical has, for the most part, never left the world’s stages— its music, writing and New York City underworld setting never growing old.

The Milwaukee Repertory Theater brings Guys and Dolls into the intimate Quadracci Powerhouse Theater, with direction by Mark Clements and featuring a plethora of Rep veterans.

Sept. 19-Oct. 29. For tickets, call 414-224-9490 or visit the box office at 108 E. Wells St. or milwaukeerep.com.

Boeing Boeing

A popular 1962 farce by French playwright Marc

Camoletti (with English translation by Beverly Cross) that won the 2008 Tony Award for Best Revival of a Play, Boeing Boeing’s premiere production in London in 1962 ran for seven years, earning a Guinness Book of World Records entry as the most performed French play.

The story centers on Bernard, a swinging bachelor with no less than three fiancées—each a stewardess for a different airline and each totally unaware of each other’s existence. Bernard manages this female-juggling act well enough until all three women arrive in town concurrently.

What’s more, Bernard’s friend Robert arrives and is staying with him; while Bernard enlists Robert’s help, will he be able to keep all of Bernard’s stories straight? The play’s title

Prometheus Trio, chamber music ensemble residents of the Wisconsin Conservatory of Music, embark upon their 18th season with a concert embracing both familiar go-to hits of the Classical repertoire as well as the more obscure.

Classical music is such a vast treasure trove that even the most ardent aficionados thereof can find new pieces in every genre on an almost routine basis. Prometheus Trio’s program makes it easy.

Joseph Haydn’s piano trios are among his most harmonically adventurous works. His three-movement Piano Trio No. 5 in G Minor (1766) stems from his earlier efforts in the genre (he’d eventually pen 45 of them). Johannes Brahms’ Piano Trio No. 2 in C Major, Op. 87 (1882) prompted its obviously proud creator to write his publisher: “You have not yet had such a beautiful trio from me and very likely have not published its equal in the last 10 years.”

Finally, Hungarian composer Lázló Lajtha’s Trio Concertant, Op. 10 (1928) is a fine work that, alas, has suffered (along with the rest of his admirable catalogue) from undue neglect. Lajtha’s home country’s former communist regime suppressed his oeuvre and that, unfortunately, has to this day kept it from much of the rest of the music-loving world.

Sept. 18-19 at the Wisconsin Conservatory of Music, 1584 N. Prospect Ave. For tickets, call 414-276-5760 or visit wcmusic. org.

MORE TO DO

The Clockwork Man

Cabaret Milwaukee opens their third season with the first part of a new trilogy of staged, old-time radio dramas: The Clockwork Man—described as “a raucous romp” that takes us back to 1937. Sept. 14-28 at the Astor Hotel Pub. Facebook. com/cabmke.

Sex Please We’re Sixty

Mistaken identities, bad backs of a certain age, slammed doors and an experimental libido-enhancing drug are the ingredients for Michael and Susan Parker’s farcical Sex Please We’re Sixty. Sept. 15-Oct. 1 at Waukesha Civic Theatre.

Waukeshacivictheatre.org.

is obviously that of the famous airline company, but it very well might be the sound of relationships impacting the tarmac.

Boeing Boeing runs Sept. 15-Oct. 1 at the Racine Theatre Guild, 2519 Northwestern Ave. For tickets, call 262-633-4218 or visit racinetheatre.org.

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Get It Out There

Two dance performances with different choreographers and dancers from a variety of disciplines present new, locally created works. Saturday, Sept. 16. Danceworks Studio Theatre. Danceworksmke.org.

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MICHAEL BROSILOW

A&E::INREVIEW

Jack Forbes Wilson and Marguerite Willbanks in ‘Souvenir’

::BY ANNE SIEGEL

THEATRE

Laughing with Florence FosterJenkins at Stackner Cabaret

F

::BY HARRY CHERKINIAN

lorence Foster Jenkins had a “career comeback” of sorts in 2016, thanks to the successful movie of the same name with Meryl Streep in the title role.

The 1940s New York socialite and amateur soprano truly believed she had an amazing opera voice while her audiences mocked her and laughed hysterically. The reason? She sang horribly off-key, dressed in outrageous (and garishly expensive) costumes and didn’t see and hear what the audiences did. Jenkins truly believed in herself and only heard a beautiful voice in her own head. As a result, Jenkins became a performing sensation with a recording contract and sold-out shows.

And now, Florence Foster Jenkins has been delightfully brought back to the stage in Souvenir, Stephen Temperley’s charming, hilarious and at times touching recreation of this oneof-a-kind entertainment phenomenon. The two-character production is told in flashbacks

by Jenkins’ longtime devoted accompanist, Cosme McMoon (Jack Forbes Wilson), as he recalls how he met Jenkins (Marguerite Willbanks) and their work together amid Jenkins’ accidental, inadvertent rise to popularity.

“They never heard her sing,” recalls a wistful McMoon as he strums the piano keys, “but they knew enough to laugh.” But Jenkins herself didn’t hear that laughter. In fact, she was tone deaf, literally and in many ways emotionally. She only heard her own beautiful singing while performing challenging operatic works. And she had the perfect and very funny response to any vocal miscues: “A vocal artist must claim some latitude.” (Still LOLing over that line—among many funny quips in Temperley’s well-written book.)

The strength of Souvenir lies in the two performances. Best known for his spot-on portrayal of Liberace in the Stackner a few seasons back, Wilson is as deft with his piano playing as he is with his funny, (initially) shocked responses to Jenkins’ “singing.” Willbanks is simply perfection start-to-finish in this production. It is as much fun to watch the accomplished Willbanks perform Jenkins’ over-the-top movements along with the singing itself.

An accomplished vocalist in her own right, Willbanks masters the difficult challenge to sing continuously off-key, sounding like Jenkins’ own original recordings.

Director Laura Braza directs with a balance of delicate intimacy timed with bombastic flourish, aided by Jason Orlenko’s cleverly designed period costumes that elicit laughs themselves. And, in these very challenging times we live in today, how wonderful it is to hear people laugh continuously—and with, not against—the performers onstage.

Through Nov. 5 at the Stackner Cabaret, 108 E. Wells St. For tickets, call 414-224-9490 or visit milwaukeerep.com.

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Family Meets the Challenge of Mental Illness in ‘Next to Normal’

A

ll families weather their share of crises, but not many are challenged like the family in Next to Normal, an awardwinning musical being presented by All-In Productions. This six-actor musical takes an intimate look at how mental illness affects not just the patient, but also everyone within that person’s universe.

In this case, the mother (superbly played

by Carrie Gray) suffers from bipolar disorder.

She is supported by her stoic husband (Steve Pfisterer), their two children, a psychiatrist and, to some extent, the daughter’s boyfriend.

Most of the show is sung, with stray bits of dialogue occasionally tossed in. All the actors have strong voices, perfect for the frequent solos and duets. Powerful voices come in handy for delivering the ensemble numbers, too, in which multiple characters sing over each other.

Next to Normal tackles a serious subject, but it does it so well that it became a surprise Broadway hit several years ago. The show, with music by Tom Kitt and book and lyrics

by Brian Yorkey, also won three Tony Awards and a rare Pulitzer Prize for drama.

All-In Productions is a newer, relatively low-budget company, so one shouldn’t expect to see large-screen projections, spinning sets and other stage wizardry. Without such distractions, however, the production focuses more directly on the characters. The intentionally threadbare, two-story set may be functional, but is lit with precision by lighting designer Mike Van Dreser. The color changes visually translate each scene’s theme. A small orchestra is located barely offstage behind the set. The musicians are terrific under the direction of Julie Johnson.

One of this production’s strengths is that student actors lend credibility to several teenage roles. Hailey Hentz, a UW-Milwaukee theater major, makes a powerful impression as college-age Natalie. Dressed in a flannel shirt over a decorated tee top and distressed jeans, Hentz looks as though she just wandered in from class. Her emotional range is extraordinary, and one hopes to see her in other productions soon. Natalie’s faithful boyfriend, Henry (Connor Dalzin), is another gem from UWM. As his character sings “Perfect for You,” he expresses his palpable connection with Natalie.

Natalie’s older brother, Gabe (Austin Dorman), pulls out all the stops in one of the show’s best numbers, “I’m Alive.” Although Dorman’s stage movement is somewhat limited here (no swinging on the set’s railings), he conveys a taunting, in-your-face approach that is equally effective. The young cast is impressively led by first-time director Tim Backes.

Through Sept. 16 at Next Act Theatre, 255 S. Water St. For tickets, call 414-278-0765 or visit nextact.org.

Carrie Gray and Adam Qutaishat in ‘Next to Narmal’ BY MARK FROHNA

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

A&E::INREVIEW

Sexy Fall Classes GADGETS & GIZMOS:

‘Over the River and Through the Woods’ BY GEORGE KATSEKES, JR

THEATRE

Italian Family Comedy ‘Over the River’ at Sunset Playhouse ::BY RUSS BICKERSTAFF

V

eteran local actors draw a warm and comic gravity to the stage in Sunset Playhouse’s production of Over the River and Through the Woods. Joe DiPietro’s comedy features Brian Braun as an Italian American from New Jersey who has been promoted to a lucrative position on the other side of the coun-

2519 Northwestern Ave. RACINE, WI 53404 For more information: RACINETHEATRE.ORG

try. He tries to break the news to his four grandparents who do their best not to a make a big deal about wanting him to stay.

Braun is charming enough in the role, but the real appeal here is the cast assembled to portray his family. Director Brian Zelinski fosters a dynamic in the old family ensemble that feels compellingly organic. Nowhere is this more apparent than in mundane moments between the characters. There’s a sparklingly humble reality in moments where they’re all there in the living room having crumb cake or sharing some kind of inane conversation over a game of Trivial Pursuit.

Joan End is endearing as an Italian grandmother determined that everyone be fed. Scott Kopischke plays her husband with a well-worn dignity drawn from a kind of casual interpersonal fearlessness. Raffaello Frattura puts in a captivatingly nuanced performance as Nunzio, a man of uniquely instinctive humor who is given to inner struggles that allow for deep personal drama. Frattura’s performance delivers as much in silence as it does in deceptively simple dialogue. Linda Wirth gives one of her more potent recent performances as his wife, who tries to set her grandson up with a reason for staying. This comes in the form of a compassionate woman delicately portrayed by Deanna Strasse.

Through Sept. 24 at the Furlan Auditorium, 800 Elm Grove Road. For tickets, visit sunsetplayhouse.com.

Returning the FUN to

Sexual Function with Lucky Tomaszek

8:30pm Thursday September 14

Living with chronic pain and disability can bring unique challenges to sexual play and pleasure. We’ll discuss tools, toys, aids and devices to help facilitate sexual expression (sexual health, function and pleasure). We will also emphasize that there’s no “right” way to have sex. There’s only what’s right for you.

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SEPT 15 - OCT 1

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Box Office Hours: M - F 12:00 - 6:00 p.m.

90 min. prior to curtain through intermission.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 27

A&E::FILM

A&E::FILMCLIPS Complete film coverage online at shepherdexpress.com

American Assassin R Although acclaimed spy novel author Vince Flynn died at just 47, he left behind a 10-novel series featuring counter-terrorism agent Mitch Rapp (played in this adaptation by Dylan O’Brien). After a loved one is killed by a terrorist attack, Rapp is trained in CIA black ops by veteran Stan Hurley (Michael Keaton). Undeniably talented, Rapp joins Hurley to investigate a rash of violent incidents. The pair team up with a Turkish agent to hunt down a malevolent, mysterious operative called “Ghost” (Taylor Kitsch). This fast-paced globetrotter unfolds in London, Singapore, Thailand and other exotic locales. Directors Antoine Fuqua and Edward Zwick came and went, the latter leaving his thumbprint on the screenplay. Fingers are crossed for something special. (Lisa Miller) ‘It’

‘It’s a Nasty Clown in Stephen King’s Horror Story

strangers—but the clown is too swift. Pennywise drags him down into the sewer, the labyrinth where the monster dwells.

It contains two parallel stories that converge as neatly as words on a crossword puzzle. One concerns the clown, an entity that surfaces every 27 years to commit mayhem. In the ’80s, he’s the agent behind the milk carton children and the missing persons posters on the telephone poles of Dewey. The other story is about high school kids at the difficult dawn of puberty, a band of root-for-them outsiders drawn together by the cruelty of their peers. Their stuttering ring leader Bill (Jaeden Lieberher), older brother of the boy who disappeared into the storm grate, is surrounded by outcasts—the nerds, the chubby kid, the Jew, the black and Beverly (Sophia Lillis), whose unwarranted bad girl rep and thrift-store chic make her the town’s Molly Ringwald wannabe.

The nasty girls prey on Beverly and the goons with the muscle car bully the boys. But the outcasts have other problems: terrible visions that no one else can see, not the adults or their popular peers. Some of their early visions are genuinely unsettling—the distorted woman’s face ::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN that comes loose from a painting to terrorize a verybody loves a clown,” boy with sharpened fangs is especially scary. according to a hit song from After awhile, however, Argentine director Andy the ’60s. But apparently, who- Muschietti, who attracted the approval of gothic ever wrote that lyric didn’t ask filmmaker Guillermo del Toro (Hellboy), disaround about clowns. Fact is: plays adherence to the horror school of nothingMany people hate clowns; they are disconcerted, is-too-much. It’s one shock and jolt after another creeped out, by the specter of heavily disguised as Pennywise pops up with the frequency of a jack-in-the-box with a broken lid. The scream mimes in fool’s costumes, lifest starts to turn comical. censed to play the jester in But the baroque (if wellpublic. That serial killer John made) profusion of startling Wayne Gacy worked part-time visuals and the film’s needIt as a clown only buttressed their lessly long running time can’t bad rep by the time Stephen Bill Skarsgård entirely get in the way of It’s King wrote It. Jaeden Lieberher strong points. The protagonists The movie adaptation is set Directed by are a band of likeable, believduring that time, the late ’80s, Andy Muschietti able kids, some of them facing in Dewey, Maine, a small town serious problems at home or in Rated R where modest houses on narrow society as well as on the astral lots crowd together on tree-lined plane and in the sewers of Dewstreets. We meet Pennywise ey. Pennywise the Clown works the Clown (Bill Skarsgård) in scene one, tempting a toddler with popcorn on fear, feeds on it, and many of his assaults are from the opening of a storm drain. That blood the illusions of fear itself. Will the kids confront red fake smile painted on a pasty face, those leer- and overcome this source of destructive anxiety? ing eyes and that malevolent titter don’t inspire Will they chicken out? Or will Pennywise recede confidence. The boy looks doubtfully at his new into the darkness, only to rise again in a sequel friend—he’s not supposed to take gifts from set during the second decade of the 21st century?

Stick around, kids.

“E

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Mother! R Living a seemingly idyllic country life, a couple play host to a stranded stranger (Ed Harris) and his woman (Michelle Pfeiffer). The new couple’s eccentric behavior prompts repeated objections from the wife (Jennifer Lawrence); however, her husband (Javier Bardem), a blocked writer, claims their new guests present the type of stimulus he requires. The screenplay, penned by director Darren Aronofsky, is more jarring than frightening, more literal than suggestive.

Despite these flaws, the fine acting and cinematography can be spellbinding. Beware a surprise twist that fails to ring true. (L.M.)

Movie Collectible Show Milwaukee’s genial movie historian Dale Kuntz, the man behind the Charles Allis Art Museum’s film series, is hosting his semi-annual movie memorabilia show. Some 30 Midwest dealers will be on hand selling cinema collectibles, including posters, books, stills, autographs, DVDs and more, with new and used, contemporary and vintage items on sale. It’s one of the only events of its kind in the area. (David Luhrssen) 10 a.m.-4 p.m., Sunday, Sept. 17 at Burnham Bowl Hall, 6016 W. Burnham St.

[HOME MOVIES/OUT ON DIGITAL] Dare to Drum

D’Drum was just a drum circle from Texas that met on Mondays—until they received an offer to perform an original work with the Dallas Symphony Orchestra. Bridging the worlds of formal composition and percussion, The Police drummer Stewart Copeland was tapped to work up a composition based on the chiming tones of D’Drum’s gamelan bells. Dare to Drum documents the creative process through interviews with the frenetic Copeland and footage shot during his sessions with D’Drum.

The Island of Dr. Moreau

H.G. Wells’ warning on the dangers of bioengineering and cellular manipulation, the 1896 novel The Island of Dr. Moreau, entered the DNA of several films. The 1977 version is surprisingly well done building tension in the welledited early scenes. Burt Lancaster is excellent as a megalomaniacal visionary frustrated in his efforts to manipulate the destiny of DNA. Michael York co-stars as the unwanted visitor who stumbles into his twisted experiment in transforming lower mammals into men.

The Stranger

The Stranger was unconventionally plotted for Hollywood: There was no handsome hero to save the day but only the acerbic Edward G. Robinson as a tough-talking investigator. Orson Welles directed The Stranger (1946) and starred as a Nazi whose fanatical evil is concealed by a charming veneer. The film noir shadows briefly recede when the drama arrives in a postcard Connecticut town. Ironically, Welles employs German Expressionism in his depiction of a German war criminal.

Carole King: Tapestry: Live in Hyde Park

It took a while before Carole King’s 2016 Hyde Park concert began—what with all the tributes appearing on the big screen behind the stage including Tom Hanks on how her 1971 LP Tapestry mirrored the zeitgeist. David Crosby phones in claiming to have listened to the recording no less than 1,684 times! Performing the classic album in its entirety, King can’t hit all the old notes but puts on a gracious and crowd-pleasing show.

—David Luhrssen

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A&E::VISUALART

VISUALART|REVIEW

Victorian Sci-Fi at Art*Bar’s ‘Steampunk Junque’

T

::BY KAT KNEEVERS

rinkets and bling and instruments and mystery. The “Steampunk Junque” exhibition at Art*Bar is not an ordinary collection of objects, as it draws on everything from Victorian fashion and science-fiction, mixed with a tinge of gothic romanticism and futuristic invention, wrapped up in nostalgia for a time that never really was. From here, the exhibition also stretches into other conceptual realms.

The roots of Steampunk reach back to the 19th and early 20th centuries. Fantastic machines, characters and even an alternate sense of history underlie this style. Influences from the Victorian and Edwardian eras frame this aesthetic with a sense of adventure and mystique.

Steampunk, coined in 1987 by author K. W. Jeter, has grown as a subculture with conventions and festivals, as well as Steampunk literature, music and art.

Given that it is something of a fashion, it was adopted as the theme for this exhibition organized by The Martini Girls, an art collective and gallery based in Wauwatosa. More than 30 artists are included, with awards given for the top three pieces plus three honorable mentions.

The exhibition title is clever and many works in the exhibition echo the general mood of the Steampunk aesthetic, which often incorporates nods to machines, metallic or robotic figures and charming reiterations of antique apparatuses. Clocks and goggles are surprisingly plentiful.

The winner of the first place award, Renee Pahlisch’s Stem Punk View, takes a punny turn in the title and the transformation of flowers and a grasshopper into mechanical creatures made of cogs and widgets and such. Others take a darker turn that is both interesting and ominous, such as Chris Behrs’ Horse Power, where sci-fi equines are combinations of flesh and locomotion power, heaving forward against a nocturnal background.

Not all of the works in the exhibition necessarily exemplify what you might expect of Steampunk style, but instead dance around the idea or its motifs. As a concept it is broadly interpreted artistically and curatorially, and is nonetheless an interesting show to check out, particularly for enjoying the convivial and colorful environment of Art*Bar. Through Oct. 4 at Art Bar, 722 E. Burleigh St. Check out a special video of the exhibition at shepherdexpress.com 30 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

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VISUALART|PREVIEW

Whitefish Bay Meets the Sea-Going Dilemma Fish in ‘The Art of Dr. Seuss’ ::BY TYLER FRIEDMAN

D

r. Seuss’ accessible language and on-the-nose rhymes belie philosophically rich assertions about identity (“Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!”) and destiny (“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”). He was also a visual artist who, while best known for illustrating his 44 children’s books, was an accomplished painter and sculptor, a fact that only became public knowledge after Seuss’ death in 1991.

“The Art of Dr. Seuss” presents a selection of drawings, paintings and sculptures, which will dumbfound fans who have never seen Seuss’ private “Midnight Paintings” and three-dimensional works. His cherished whimsy is in full effect and finds new depth in carefully planned and exquisitely colored canvasses. Seuss’ sculptures give the illusion of living in the artist’s world. His “Unorthodox Taxidermy” introduces Seussian species such as the Carbonic Walrus, the Two-Horned Drouberhannis, the Goo-GooEyed Tasmanian Wolghast and the Sea-Going Dilemma Fish. All the artworks are for sale, but the brief exhibition is only on display at Gallery 505 (517 E. Silver Spring Drive) from Sept. 1417. There is a special opening reception from 6-8 p.m. on Thursday, Sept. 14.

Dr. Suess, After Dark in the Park

“The Seventh Day: Revisiting Shabbat” Jewish Museum Milwaukee | 1360 N. Prospect Ave.

The Jewish Museum Milwaukee closes each Friday at 3 p.m., well before sunset, and remains shuttered until noon Sunday, after Shabbat has ended.

In “The Seventh Day: Revisiting Shabbat,” 30 artists explore Judaism’s weekly tradition of unplugging in order to reconnect. The art ranges from paper cuts and lithographs to works of recycled metal and wood, and the contributing artists hail from around the world and, in the case of Deborah Ugoretz, from our Milwaukee home. “The Seventh Day: Revisiting Shabbat” is accompanied by a busy schedule of educational and entertaining programs throughout October and November. The exhibition is on display through Dec. 31.

“Husband & Husband: Lon Michels and Todd Olson”

Portrait Society Gallery | 207 E. Buffalo St., Fifth Floor Although it isn’t strictly speaking a work of art, in “Husband & Husband: Lon Michels and Todd Olson” the couple’s California marriage certificate will be prominently displayed alongside their paintings as a cultural accomplishment of equal worth. The exhibition, at the Portrait Society Gallery from Sept. 15 through Nov. 10, is the couple’s first side-by-side show.

The intimacy of the wed is revealed in similarity of style (a preference for flat forms, textile-like patterns and bold colors) and their treatment of the same subject matter (the Greek myth of Daedalus and Icarus). A reception will be held 6-8 p.m. on Friday, Sept. 15.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

A&E::BOOKS It’ss Back-to-Reading Back to Reading Seas Season!

BOOK |PREVIEW

Young Adult Author Jason Reynolds Confronts Coming of Age in ‘Patina’ ::BY JENNI HERRICK

BOOK |REVIEW

Fear of a Norb Planet: The Complete MaximumRockNRoll Columns 1994-98 (BULGE), BY REV. NORB (NORBERT ROZEK) Sometimes, Norbert “Rev. Norb” Rozek wrote entertainingly about rumblings on the punk-rock underground, catapulting from his indie-level notoriety with the band Boris The Sprinkler during his five years writing a column for MaximumRockNRoll. But while the Green Bay native occasionally touched upon that trope, his collected columns, Fear of a Norb Planet, is more often about a selfproclaimed goofy, possibly genius intellect given to sharing copious autobiographical detail while drawing iconoclastic cultural connections. If one can successfully navigate the lack of paragraph breaks and font tinier than that of his own often hilarious ’80s fanzine, Sick Teen, among the rewards are a nostalgic rewind for those who inhabited a similar subcultural sphere as the Rev. during the Clinton presidency and the workings of a singular mind preoccupied with an array of subjects that filled his Wisconsin life. Norb Planet is a compelling read from a strangely, amusingly obsessive dude. (Jamie Lee Rake)

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

NAACP Image Award winner Jason Reynolds, returns to Boswell for Patina, the companion novel to the National-BookAward nominated Ghost, Fri Sep 15, 6:30 pm.

Horticulture scholar Marta McDowell appears at Boswell for The World of

Laura Ingalls Wilder: The Frontier Landscapes That Inspired the Little House Books, Tue Sep 19, 7 pm.

F

iguratively, a patina refers to natural or unavoidable fading or aging that occurs over time. Yet it can also describe a superficial cover or exterior. For a middle schooler named Patina with a difficult home life and a fiercely competitive streak, both definitions are true, and it is the freedom of running track that helps her overcome the friendship challenges she faces at her hoity-toity private school, the fear she hides regarding her mother’s failing health and the instability she feels in living with a white adopted mother.

Jason Reynolds’ new middle-grade book Patina is the second volume in his Track series (following on the success of Ghost, the debut volume which was shortlisted for a National Book Award for Young People’s Literature), and the highly acclaimed author returns to the entertaining story of four unlikely teammates each with personal demons who are doing their best to outrun their teenage angst and anxiety. For Patina, that means learning to grow into a strong female and embrace the unique support network that surrounds her.

Reynolds has created another stunning narrative filled with multi-dimensional coming-of-age characters and realistic storylines. He is a New York Times bestselling author, the recipient of multiple Coretta Scott King honors and the winner of a Kirkus Prize for Young Readers. The author will speak at Boswell Book Co. at 6:30 p.m. on Friday, Sept. 15.

Jason Reynolds

Denise Chanterelle DuBois discusses her Milwaukee childhood, and life as a businessperson, environmentalist, and trans woman, in her new memoir, Self-Made Woman, at Boswell on Wed Sep 20, 7 pm.

From The Nation and Cap Times, John Nichols brings us Horsemen of the

Trumpocalypse: A Field Guide to the Most Dangerous People in America, Wed Sep 27,

7 pm, at Boswell.

Don’t miss this author signing with Donald Driver for The

3D Body Revolution.

Ticket includes a signed book and posed photo - Fri Sep 22, 7 pm. Call 800 -838-3006 or purchase ticket at drivermke.bpt.me. Use password SHEPEX and get $2 off the ticket.

Boswell Book Company Visit: 2559 N. Downer Call: (414) 332-1181 Browse:boswellbooks.com Email: info@boswellbooks.com Like: Facebook.com/boswellbooks S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 31

A&E::OFFTHECUFF

Off the Cuff with political satirist Will Durst ::BY MEGAN LEONARD

M

ilwaukee-born political satirist Will Durst has been called half-therapist, halfcomedian. His new show, “Durst Case Scenario,” brings comfort to those with similar political frustrations in an era of what the comedian calls PTSD (President Trump Stress Disorder). He will return to his native city for two nights of satirical humor, Sept. 22-23, at ComedySportz Milwaukee.

What are your connections to Milwaukee and how does it feel to be returning home to do a show?

I have many relatives still in Milwaukee, my brother is in Menomonee Falls and I visit him a lot. I love the 414 area code.

It’s an undiscovered jewel and I always try to be a big community booster. I follow the Brewers, the Packers, the Bucks and the Badgers and I also went to UWM for seven years.

How did you first get a start with politics? What came first comedy or political satire?

I started at this little club that was right on Juneau Avenue called The Rusty Nail in 1974. In 1974 pretty much everything was political because of Vietnam, Watergate and Nixon. I didn’t do all political material onstage but I did do a lot just because it was what was going on. I was also interested in politics which I got from my step-dad and dad who read three plus newspapers a day. I just grew up thinking everybody did that.

How would you personally describe your upcoming show, “Durst Case Scenario”?

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What is your writing process? How do you produce material before a show?

I give myself deadlines. I write a commentary every week that goes out to various radio stations. So I need an enforced deadline. I’m still in high school; if it’s Monday morning I don’t start it until Sunday after “60 Minutes.” Last night I did a commentary and sent it out to 10 different radio stations and then this morning I wrote a column. I have two different voices: the columnist voice and the stand-up comic voice.

PAT JOHNSON

The ‘Durst Case Scenario’?

It’s just about what life is like during the time of Trump.

This show is me and an overhead projector—I’m very old school. I have transparencies, maps, graphs and pictures of important characters all involved in the narrative. I have pretty much abandoned all pretenses of being bipartisan so this 85-minute show is me taking [Trump] to task.

As he says, “I’m just counterpunching.” I’m going to play by his rules now.

Is now a good time to be a political satirist or is Trump making it too easy?

People think that it’s so easy and that Trump is a gift for comedy but no, it’s hard because how do you parody a parody? It’s hard to focus on things because he tries to use chaos as fog and people’s attention spans are so short that they keep forgetting about the previous scandal. The hardest part is keeping up and keeping relevant. So there’s a lot of writing and rewriting.

How can readers follow you and your shows?

I put out a joke every day on Twitter and Facebook. You can catch up on videos and previous columns and commentaries on willdurst.com.

Will Durst

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::HEARMEOUT

For more, log onto shepherdexpress.com

ASK RUTHIE | UPCOMING EVENTS | PAUL MASTERSON

::RUTHIE’S

SOCALCALENDAR Sept. 13: Milwaukee LGBT+ Career Fair at Hyatt Regency (333 W. Kilbourn Ave.): Looking for a job? Need a new career path? Want to work for a company committed to helping the LGBT+ community? Then you’re in luck, sugar!

Swing by this job fair between 5:30 and 8 p.m. and learn what opportunities are out there for you. Hosted by the Wisconsin LGBT Chamber of Commerce, the free event includes a “résumé review station,” so come ready to mix, mingle and find your new employer!

Sept. 14: Movie Night at D.I.X. (739 S. First St.): Tracy, Edna, Motormouth Maybelle and the whole crew are headed to this Walker’s Point hot spot for John Waters’ cult classic Hairspray! Show time is 9 p.m. with popcorn, drink specials and a drag show at intermission. Catch that bug and check out this whacky-ass movie night.

Take a Deep Breath and Go

Sept. 15: Street Eats at Catalano Square (147 N. Broadway): More than 15 food trucks open shop during this 4-8 p.m. mobile food fest that includes live music, beer and more.

Treat your taste buds to this change-of-pace dinner option that promises to shake up your week and jumpstart your weekend!

Dear Ruthie,

Sept. 16: Bay View Bash (On Kinnickinnic between Potter and Clement): Say “adios summer” with this popular street fest that features five stages, three beer bars and more than 140 vendors! Don’t miss the demonstration stage, family area and the great shopping and restaurants open along the streets. The free fest is open to all from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. If you see me there be sure to say “hi”… and buy me a beer.

I have a situation with another woman at work. Last year she really stabbed me in the back, costing me a promotion and throwing me under the bus in front of senior management. Even though we don’t work in the same department, I truly cannot stand her, and this makes my work life difficult. I’m not sure what steps I should take to get over the hatred I have for this person. Any advice would be appreciated.

Thank you, Pissy Missy Dear Pissy, Put on your big-girl panties and move forward, sistah! I know it’s tough, but by holding onto this grudge you’re only hurting yourself and allowing her to win. You think this dame is spending her time and energy thinking about you? Doubtful.

Sure, you could slash her tires. Of course, you could hide a python in her desk. Clearly, you could fill her coffee cup with feces.

Obviously, you could hire a gigolo to seduce her and leave her with an intense case of crabs. (I know a guy, by the way.) Those options really wouldn’t help in the end, would they? And, likely, they’d put you in trouble with the cops.

It’s seems too late to take last year’s situation to human resources or management, so I’d just leave the past in the past. Instead, start every day by saying out loud, “The past is the past; today is an exciting opportunity for happiness.” Then, take a deep breath and go tackle your day…or put boogers in her sandwich. Your call.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Sept. 17: Steer Queer “Byke” Ride at Sprocket Café (3385 S. Kinnickinnic Ave.): Say what? An LGBTQ+ bike ride with stops for Bloody Marys and brunch? Sign me up! Arrive at 10 a.m., and head out 30 minutes later for the ride of your life through Riverwest and Shorewood. Wear your sparkly-est, dragy-est, shiniest, coolest outfit to make this a ride for the books.

Sept. 20: Hurricane Harvey Relief Fundraiser at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): The Hamburger Mary’s girls take to the stage during this special Dining with the Divas show to help those in Houston affected by Hurricane Harvey.

Toss back a few cold ones, sink your teeth into some savory bites and enjoy more fun than you can shake a hip pad at during this 8 p.m. fundraiser.

Want to share an event with Ruthie? Need her advice on a situation? Email DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Be sure to follow her Facebook (Ruthie Keester) and Twitter (@DearRuthie).

Know your status.

Get tested!

Free HIV and STD testing at 6pm on Monday and Tuesday nights.

No appointment needed.

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bestd.org

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Join us for our 5-Year Anniversary Celebration & Business Showcase Wednesday, September 27 5:30 to 8:00 p.m.

Potawatomi Hotel & Casino Woodland Dreams Ballrooms 1721 W Canal Street Milwaukee, WI All are welcome. Free to attend.

RSVPs appreciated at WisLGBTChamber.com/anniversary

Thanks to our presenting sponsor:

S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 33

S AV E T H E DA T E

::MYLGBTQPoint of View

Coming to a (Live) Theater Near You The 2017-18 season’s LGBTQ offerings ::BY PAUL MASTERSON

O

Taste of the

World October 21

Doors open at 2pm

•

nce again, there’s no dearth of LGBTQ-relevant theater on Milwaukee’s stages for the 2017-18 season. Actually, things are well underway.

The Milwaukee Chamber Theatre just ran Ira Levin’s Deathtrap to open the season. The 1978 play-within-a-play murder mystery had a subliminal gay twist. Four decades later, the revival wasn’t quite as shocking for that but merely added an inclusive dimension. Speaking of twists, Dale Gutzman revived his own camp rework of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? at Off the Wall Theatre. Played in drag

by Jeremy Welter and Mark Hagen, the gutsy homage brought crazy Jane and her invalid sister Blanche to a sublime and ridiculous theatrical high. If you missed it, maybe he’ll do it again.

Next on the marquee, opening Thursday, Sept. 21, is Mark Boucher’s Boulevard Theatre production of Small Things, a recent work by gay Canadian playwright, Daniel MacIvor. Topically timely, the brief two act follows the crossed paths of three women, one a retired teacher, the other her maid and the third, the maid’s daughter. The topically timely part is the maid’s grandson, Wolfgang, a grade schooler who decides he is, henceforth, Alice. Reality ensues.

Later in the season Boucher produces The Best Brothers by the same playwright. This one involves two brothers who must settle the

estate of their suddenly (and tragically during a pride parade mishap involving a drag queen named Pina Colada) departed mother, Bunny.

Bittersweet sibling rivalry ensues.

Also on Thursday, Sept. 21 is the Milwaukee Repertory Theater’s LGBT Pride Night for its production of the popular Broadway musical, Guys and Dolls. Although not gay per se…who am I kidding, it’s a Broadway musical, after all, and that spells gay with a capital “G.” The Skylight Music Theatre’s LGBT “Be OUT” nights have yet to be announced, although presumably they will. Its season doesn’t have much gay-specific programming but Artistic Director Ray Jivoff assures us it will be “fun.” That shifts from the brief but memorable tenure of former Artistic Director Viswa Subbaraman during which we experienced daring and cerebral productions of rare pieces like the Philip Glass/Allen Ginsburg song cycle Hydrogen Jukebox, Somtow Sucharitkul’s Snow Dragon and Thomas Adès’ Powder Her Face. Still, titles like Hot Mikado, Zombies from the Beyond and Urinetown, plus the addition of Jill Anna Ponasik as artistic associate, promise an entertaining season nonetheless.

Meanwhile, back at the Chamber Theatre, we’ll have to wait until the spring for John Patrick Shanley’s Doubt. The play’s return after the Milwaukee Rep’s production a decade ago should revive the discussion of how we deal with perceptions of race, homosexuality and the mighty fortress of religion in light of all that has transpired in the interim.

And, speaking of spring awakenings, back at the Rep, Our Town by Madison-born playwright Thornton Wilder, lover of part-time Milwaukeean Sam Steward, the famed sexual renegade, opens in April. According to some, the play’s third act was inspired by Wilder’s affair with Steward. One way or the other, the work is considered one of the greatest plays ever written.

Unfortunately, there are apparently no lesbian-themed plays being staged. They’re rare anyway but maybe Renaissance Theaterworks will do something someday.

Italian Community Center

ART • FOOD ENTERTAINMENT FROM AROUND THE WORLD shepherdexpress.com 34 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

CREAM CITY FOUNDATION

Business Equality Luncheon Pfister Hotel September 22, 2017 11:30 AM – 1:30 PM KEYNOTE SPEAKER

Celebrating and promoting LGBTQ inclusive workplaces

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TICKETS START AT $125 Tables & sponsorships also available.

Contact Emmet at eliston@CreamCityFoundation.org

PRESENTING SPONSOR

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For information on becoming a sponsor & related benefits: mkelgbt.org/events/big-night-out

S E P T E M B E R 14 , 2 0 1 7 | 35

::MUSIC

For more MUSIC, log onto shepherdexpress.com

FEATURE | ALBUM REVIEWS | CONCERT REVIEWS | LOCAL MUSIC

SLAYER’S DAVE LOMBARDO GIVES HARDCORE A TRY WITH DEAD CROSS ::BY MICHAEL CARRIERE

t 52 years old, Dave Lombardo, one of the most influential percussionists in the history of American underground music, is excited to be drumming for a hardcore punk band. More than 35 years since the beginning of his stint as the drummer for heavy-metal legends Slayer, Lombardo now finds himself as a member of Dead Cross, a supergroup of sorts that features bassist Justin Pearson (the Locust), guitarist Mike Crain (Retox) and vocalist Mike Patton (Faith No More).

“I really don’t think about it,” explains Lombardo when asked what it’s like to be a middle-aged man in a scene often defined by youth. “Yes, I play this music. Yes, I’m 52.” In fact, Lombardo actually sees hardcore as capable of speaking to all age groups, particularly during times of anxiety and upheaval. Unlike most contemporary popular music, hardcore “remains honest,” notes Lombardo. “It’s not sugarcoated. The music isn’t following a formula.” A quick glance at the song titles on the band’s self-titled LP suggest that the band has been paying close attention to current events.

Songs such as “Idiopathic,”“Obedience School” and “The Future Has Been Cancelled” seem tailor-made to be played at maximum volume for the duration of the Trump era.

While Lombardo’s aggressive drumming style helps drive such songs, the key to Dead Cross’ ability to transcend the traditional limitations of hardcore is due to the presence of Patton. Patton, as Lombardo suggests, has always been a hardcore fan. “He relates,” Lombardo says. “It’s not foreign to him. In fact, he’s always had an affinity for this type of music.” Listening to Patton scream and rant his way through album opener “Seizure and Desist” makes it clear that Patton is doing more than simply showing

36 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

Dead Cross

up and cashing a paycheck. In fact, Patton’s vocal range allows Dead Cross to push hardcore in new directions. On songs such as “Gag Reflex,” Patton moves from operatic croon to blood-curdling scream in less than 30 seconds. “He adds a new element, a new style, to this genre,” explains Lombardo. Pausing for a moment, he then asks, with a laugh, “How many cookie-monster vocalists do we need?”

Patton’s vocal dexterity adds an air of unpredictability to Dead Cross’ material, making what could have been a straight-ahead hardcore record a bit more thought-provoking and unsettling. Such an atmosphere is only enhanced by Patton’s approach to lyric writing. On “Seizure and Desist,” Patton sings of “Holiday shirts and your hedge-fund ghosts” joining hands in “The paperwork explosion.”“A Vegas whale,” Patton screams out, “Pimps and johns and patriot scum / Dead Cross We’re an updated, outdated / Ocean full of chum.” If nothing else, Patton captures perfectly the confusion Turner Hall that the last two years have brought to American culBallroom tural and political life—and the feeling that perhaps Sunday, Sept. 17, the worst is yet to come.

8 p.m.

Lombardo explains that the rationale for starting a project like Dead Cross was always very clear. “We wanted to make something different,” says Lombardo, “something a bit off the rails.” Each player in Dead Cross has already found varying degrees of success in the world of music—a fact that could have lessened some of the angst that often fuels the best hardcore. Yet this lack of pressure to prove themselves seems to have given Dead Cross the space needed to create something truly innovative and, in the process, highlight that hardcore can age gracefully.

Dead Cross play Turner Hall Ballroom, 1034 N. Fourth St., on Sunday, Sept. 17 at 8 p.m. with opener Secret Chiefs 3 (featuring Trey Spruance of Mr. Bungle).

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

MUSIC::LOCAL MELISSA LEE JOHNSON

MUSIC::CONCERTREVIEW

Rock The Green Delivered a Seamless Day of Music and Environmental Awareness

Y

::BY EVAN RYTLEWSKI

ou’d be hard-pressed to find a better-intentioned music festival than Rock The Green. Each year, the event demonstrates a cleaner, more sustainable model for outdoor festivals, starting by eliminating wasteful water bottles (all attendees are instead given a refillable aluminum water bottle at the gate) and ending with a plan for recycling human waste (we won’t get into it). The event’s attention to detail is astounding, and thankfully organizers put as much thought into the fan experience as they do their environmental footprint.

In its second year at the Reed Street Yards, an unlikely but accommodating venue along the Menomonee River, the event was a well-oiled machine, providing great sightlines and good sound at both music stages, as well as short lines for food and toilets and plenty of room for kids to run around and burn off some energy (kids 10 and under got in free, and many parents took advantage). There was even free coffee. If only all outdoor festivals were so accommodating.

Where Rock The Green sometimes falls short is its lineup. The event has a clear ideological identity, but its musical identity isn’t as fully formed. It’s not quite a hippie festival (although that would work) or a distinctively curated crossgenre grab bag in the Radio Milwaukee mold (though that would work, too). Instead Saturday’s lineup, a mix of local mainstays, touring acts and headliner Ben Harper, felt a little scattershot, though all the performers pulled their weight.

Renya, the beat-heavy reincarnation of the Milwaukee duo Vic + Gab, again proved themselves one of the city’s most polished pop acts, performing jumpy electro-alternative songs with

just a hint of Haim. Guitarist Evan Christian, a mainstay at the festival since its first year, did two sets, one solo and one leading a bluesy power trio. Klassik served as his own backing band during his posh 45 minutes of personable soul-rap.

And, while Devil Met Contention’s gothic spin on rockabilly might have made them an odd fit for a breezy festival, in their matching suits the quartet delivered a tight, striking set that held the crowd’s attention.

As is often the case at these kinds of festivals, some of the day’s best performances came after dark. Appearing a few weeks ahead of the release of his debut album, The Attractions of Youth, British buzz-rocker Barns Courtney led an hour of stomping, Arctic Monkeys-esque alternative of the sort that might make an excited NME editor run to the pay phone like he’s just witnessed Marty McFly rip through “Johnny B. Goode.”

Courtney commits to his rock-star routine. Last time he played Milwaukee, at Summerfest, he broke his foot in three places stage-diving. He told the crowd this was his first show in months where he was back to somewhat normal mobility, though his foot was still in a protective walking boot.

As Milwaukee soulman D’Amato and his horn-packed, 12-piece band closed out the side stage with an animated, ridiculously fun set of hip-hop, funk and ska (yeah, they went there), much of the crowd parked out at the main stage in anticipation of Ben Harper and the Innocent Criminals. It was hard to imagine a more fitting closer, since Harper’s blend of roots rock and reggae was a good encapsulation of Rock The Green as a whole: pleasant, good-natured and seamless.

You’ve got to give the organizers credit; they know how to run a mighty smooth festival.

Barns Courtney BY BREW CITY LIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Off the Beaten Path

Off The Beaten Path Finds New Home in Bay View ::BY LAUREN KEENE

M

ilwaukee’s huge record store population is one of the city’s biggest draws for music lovers. There are record stores in nearly every corner of the city eager to provide wax addicts with a quick music fix. Rush-Mor Records and Acme Records & Music Emporium have turned Bay View into an oasis for LP lovers, and Off the Beaten Path’s recent opening at 3201 S. Howell Ave. has turned that cherished duo of record stores into a newly formed power trio.

Off the Beaten Path stands out from other Milwaukee-area record stores with its eclectic selection, cheap prices and uber-friendly owner Christopher Kruse. Previously located in a tiny “blink and you’ll miss it” space on Farwell Ave., the store certainly lived up to its name; though the miniscule building was often overshadowed by Koppa’s and Comet Café, Off the Beaten Path gained a loyal and passionate customer base.

“Anyone who was in the previous space knew it was really small, and the building was not in great shape, nor well-maintained,” said Kruse. “I got very tired of maintenance issues and thought about expanding for a while. I wanted a spot that was quite a bit larger so we could display much more equipment and more vinyl.”

After spending six years on the East Side, the store outgrew its humble abode and relocated to a bigger building nestled in the southwestern corner of Bay View in June. Off The Beaten Path’s new location is significantly larger and much more noticeable than the last, with three sizeable rooms dedicated to music. Even though the space has changed, Kruse’s priorities have stayed the same. Maintaining an impressive vinyl selection is one of the store’s trademarks, and the new location will continue to carry on that legacy.

“It’s a much bigger space to fill. We’re displaying and selling quite a bit more equipment,” Kruse says. “We are also able to put out more vinyl daily. Right now, we’re experimenting with a few new titles as well, but those are just ones that the original pressings are very pricey and very difficult to find. Our focus will always be on original first pressings.”

While vinyl still takes up a huge part of Off The Beaten Path’s real estate, the bigger space allows for inventory outside of LPs. The store boasts hundreds of CDs and cassettes for music lovers who haven’t jumped back on the vinyl train just yet. Magazines, buttons, shirts and other music memorabilia are also for sale. Audio equipment is another huge focus for Krause, who converted the store’s back room into a repair shop for gear. He says the new location has attracted new Bay View area customers who are excited to have yet another record store in their neighborhood.

“So far, the transition has been great. It’s actually gone better than expected,” Kruse explains. “We are always pretty slow in summer, but it’s been better this year since the move. Shoppers are definitely a mix of previous customers from the East Side and new ones from Bay View.”

Though moving can be stressful and uncomfortable, Kruse says the new Bay View location has proven a refreshing change of pace.

“The first couple weeks, it felt weird,” he said. “I really enjoyed the old space and grown so accustomed to it after six-plus years. It took a while for this one to start to feel like home. I think we’re nearing that point now.”

Off the Beaten Path is located at 3201 S. Howell Ave. The store is open Thursdays and Fridays 12 p.m.-7 p.m., Saturdays 11 a.m.-7 p.m. and Sundays 11 a.m.-4 p.m.

S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 37

MUSIC::LISTINGS THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 14

Amelia's, Jackson Dordel Jazz Quintet (4pm) Angelo's Piano Lounge, Acoustic Guitar Night Art Bar, Comedy Open Mic Cactus Club, Barwork 4 Presents: Carnage the Executioner, Taiyamo Denku, Kareem City, Amerikas Addiction, Alter Ego, Hiii Tribe & Trutanium Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), The New Pioneers Caroline's Jazz Club, Benefit for Homeless Veterans w/J. Ryan Trio County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Acoustic Irish Folk w/Barry Dodd Good City Brewing, Chicken Wire Empire Harry's Bar & Grill, Kyle Feerick (6pm) Jazz Estate, Dave Braun Trio Kelly's Bleachers (Big Bend), Thursday Night Acoustic Open Jam w/host Michael Sean Linneman's Riverwest Inn, Acoustic Showcase: Jack tell, Myles Coyne, Mike McKinnon, & Justin Otto Mason Street Grill, Mark Thierfelder Jazz Trio (5:30pm) O'Donoghues Irish Pub (Elm Grove), The All-Star SUPERband (6pm) Pabst Theater, Nathan Carter Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Subtle Undertones w/ Matt & Karla Acoustic (8pm), In the Fire Pit: Xenoband (8:30pm) Riverside Theater, Scott Brothers: House Party The Bay Restaurant, Ian Gould The Packing House Restaurant, Barbara Stephan & Peter Mac (6pm) Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Latin Session: Cecilo Negron Jr. Presents Turner Hall Ballroom, X w/Skating Polly

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 15

American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), Vern & The Originals Polka Band American Legion of Okauchee #399, Depot Express Angelo's Piano Lounge, Piano Night Art Bar, Matthew Gabriel Cactus Club, Juiceboxxx w/Taj, Stormchaser & Tubbs Cafe Bavaria, Oktoberfest w/Jeff Winard Caroline's Jazz Club, The Paul Silbergleit Quartet Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: The Safes w/Scarecrow Dave (8pm); DJ: Daniel James (10pm) Clarke Hotel (Waukesha), Dick Eliot Jazz Guitar (6pm) Club Garibaldi, Funk Summit Bass Team w/Witchdoctor & Lovanova Colectivo Coffee On Prospect, Rainer Maria w/Olivia Neutron John County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Traditional Irish Ceilidh Session Frank's Power Plant, Dead Fortune w/The Band Path & Contraptions

Hops & Leisure (Oconomowoc), Jonny T-Bird & Big Dad Iron Mike's (Franklin), Jam Session w/Steve Nitros & Friends Jazz Estate, John Raymond & Real Feels (8pm), Late Night Session: Steve Peplin - Neil Davis Duo (11:30pm) Jokerz Comedy Club, Mike Stanley Kick Switch Bar And Grill (Okauchee), The B Side Band Lakefront Brewery Beer Hall, Brewhaus Polka Kings (5:30pm) Linneman's Riverwest Inn, The Narrows w/Derek Pritzl and the Gamble Los Mariachis Mexican Restaurant, Larry Lynne Band Mamie's, Harvey Westmoreland Mason Street Grill, Phil Seed Trio (6pm) Milwaukee Ale House, The Hook Up Miramar Theatre, Future Rock w/Chachuba (all-ages, 9pm) Pabst Theater, Marisela Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Alyssia Dominguez & Jeremy Zima (9pm), In the Fire Pit: The Kingfish Band (9pm) Potbelly Sandwich Shop (East Side), Texas Dave (noon) Rave / Eagles Club, Greta Van Fleet w/ Welles Riverside Theater, John Mulaney Roma's Ristorante & Lounge (East Troy), Tom Sorce (6pm) Saloon on Calhoun, Altered Five Blues Band Shank Hall, Brand X Smith Bros. Coffee House (Port Washington), Mambo Surfers The Bay Restaurant, Peter Donalds The Iron Horse Hotel, 9th Anniversary Party w/Katie Mack & the Moan (6pm) The Terminal, Rocker!

Turner Hall Ballroom, Rakim w/KLASSIK Up & Under Pub, King Solomon Von Trier, Sanctified Grumblers

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 16

American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), The Falcons Angelo's Piano Lounge, Piano Night Art Bar, Sarah Pray Bootz Saloon, Dixie Crush Cactus Club, Bay View Bash After-Party: A Giant Dog, Suaves, MAMA, Platinum Boys & Sex Scenes Cafe Bavaria, Oktoberfest w/Bob Korek Caroline's Jazz Club, Adekola Adedapo & The Paul Spencer Band w/James Sodke, Curt Hanrahan & Larry Tresp Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Names Devine w/Fudgy (8pm); DJ: WarLock (10pm) Colectivo Coffee at the Lake, Close Enuf Band (10am) ComedySportz Milwaukee, Laughing Liberally Milwaukee Crush Wine Bar (Waukesha), Dave Miller Duo w/Hal Miller Delafield Brewhaus, Rebecca & The Grey Notes Fox Point Farmers Market, Milwaukee Hot Club (10am) Frank's Power Plant, Bay View Bash Outdoor Stage: Maiden Milwaukee, Midnight Liedtke, Missile Fist, Alleyway, Population Control & King Eye & The Squirts (12pm)

Hilton Milwaukee City Center, Vocals & Keys Jazz Estate, Bryce Eastwood Quartet (8pm), Late Night Session: Gypsy Jazz w/Scott Hlavenka & Friends (11:30pm) Jokerz Comedy Club, Mike Stanley Lapham Peak State Park, SummerStage Music Series: Reverend Raven & The Chain Smokin' Altar Boys (6:30pm) Linneman's Riverwest Inn, The Boonduggies w/The Red Flags, Three Unassisted, & F in Fun Mainstream Bar & Grill (Waukesha), Joe Kadlec Mason Street Grill, Jonathan Wade Trio (6pm) Mezcalero Restaurant, Larry Lynne Band Miramar Theatre, Yheti w/DMVU & Toadface (ages 17-plus, 9pm) Pabst Theater, Capitol Steps Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Katie Mack & the Moan Rave / Eagles Club, Los Huracanes Del Norte w/Revancha Nortena & La Guerra (all-ages, 8pm) Saloon on Calhoun, 5 Card Studs Shank Hall, Pundamonium: The Milwaukee Pun Slam Spanky's Hideaway (Mequon), Billy Flynn, Kevin Cannon, James & Mary Davis (2pm) The Cheel (Thiensville), Steve Cohen & Peter Roller The Coffee House, Rick Fitzgerald and David HB Drake Concert The Packing House Restaurant, Lem Banks, Jeff Stoll, Alvin Turner & Omar (6:30pm) Urban Harvest Brewing Company, I Should Know This

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 17

Angelo's Piano Lounge, Live Karaoke w/Julie Brandenburg Cactus Club, The Midnight Ghost Train w/Asatta Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Comity w/Cartoon Pussy (8pm); DJ: John Riepenhoff & Sara Caron (10pm) Dopp's Bar & Grill, CCMC w/Bruce Russell & The Rustlers (2pm) Iron Mike's (Franklin), Jammin' Jimmy Open Jam (3pm) Pabst Theater, Gordon Lightfoot Rounding Third Bar and Grill, The Dangerously Strong Comedy Open Mic Scotty's Bar & Pizza, Larry Lynne Solo (4pm) The Tonic Tavern, Rolling Cohens aka The RoCos w/Steve Cohen, Peter Roller, Bob Mueller & Kurt Koenig (4pm) Turner Hall Ballroom, Dead Cross w/Dave Lombardo, Mike Patton, Justin Pearson & Michael Crain, and Secret Chiefs 3

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 18

Cactus Club, Bat House w/Tapebenders & The Days Before Everything Company Brewing, Human Heat w/Norwegian Arms & Rose of the West Jazz Estate, Latin Jam Session w/Cecilio Negron

Linneman's Riverwest Inn, Poet's Monday w/host Timothy Kloss & featured reader Mario the Poet (7:30-10:30pm) Mason Street Grill, Joel Burt Duo (5:30pm) Paulie's Pub and Eatery, Open Jam w/Christopher John Rave / Eagles Club, The Flaming Lips w/Mac DeMarco (allages, 7pm) Up & Under Pub, Marshall McGhee and the Wanderers Open Mic

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 19

C Notes Upscale Sports Lounge, Another Night-Another Mic Open Mic w/Darryl Hill Frank's Power Plant, Duck and Cover Comedy Open Mic Italian Community Center, The Blues Disciples (6:30pm) Jazz Estate, Extra Crispy Brass Band Mamie's, Open Blues Jam w/Marvelous Mack Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) Miramar Theatre, Tuesday Open Mic w/host Sandy Weisto (sign-up 7:30pm) Shank Hall, Tift Merritt w/Weathermen The Jazz Gallery Center for the Arts, Jazz Jam Session Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Transfer House Band w/Dennis Fermenich Turner Hall Ballroom, Thee Oh Sees w/The Hussy and Solid Freex

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 20 Art Bar, Paul Kaye Cactus Club, Martin Savage Gang w/Shady & The Vamp & Drugs Dragons Caroline's Jazz Club, Harvey Westmoreland w/Knee Deep Blues Jam Colectivo Coffee On Prospect, Trout Steak Revival w/The Wooks Conway's Smokin' Bar & Grill, Open Jam w/Big Wisconsin Johnson Iron Mike's (Franklin), Danny Wendt Open Jam (6pm) Jazz Estate, Juli Wood Quartet Kochanski's Concertina Beer Hall, Polka Open Jam Linneman's Riverwest Inn, Acoustic Open Stage w/feature Paul Smith & Andy Jehly (sign-up 8:30pm, start 9pm) Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) Paulie's Field Trip, Humpday Jam w/Dave Wacker & Mitch Cooper Potbelly Sandwich Shop (East Side), Texas Dave (noon) Route 20 Outhouse (Sturtevant), Wednesday Night Acoustic w/Jesse Voelker (5pm) Shank Hall, Haken - 10th Anniversary Tour w/Sithu Aye & Mammoth The Packing House Restaurant, Carmen Nickerson & Kostia Efimov (6pm)

Live Music Cocktail Service Every Night

Thurs. 9/ 14 9 pm

JULIE WOOD QUARTET

Fri. 9/ 15 8 pm

Thurs. 9/21 9 pm

11:30 pm PEPLIN/ DAVIS DUO

DAN FLYNN TRIO

Sat. 9/ 16 8 pm

Fri. 9/22 8 pm

11:30 pm SCOTT HLAVENKA & FRIENDS

11:30 pm PEPLIN/DAVIS/JACOBSON

Mon. 9/ 18 9 pm

Sat. 9/23 8 pm

JOHN RAYMOND & “REAL FEELS”

BRYCE EASTWOOD QUARTET

9/14 Wooldridge Brothers 9/21 De La Buena

DAVID WAKE LATIN QUINTET

JAM SESSION CECILIO NEGRÓN

RODRIGO VILLANUEVA TRIO 11:30 pm KYMAERA

Tues. 9/ 19 9 pm

Mon. 9/25 8 pm

EXTRA CRISPY DJ CAROL KLEIN BRASS BAND SPINS HERBIE! 2423 North Murray Ave

38 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

Wed. 9/20 8 pm

DAVE BRAUN TRIO

Jazzestate.com SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Happy Mabon Psychic Fair

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Disclaimer: The Shepherd Express makes no representations or warranties of any kind, whether express or implied, regarding any advertising. Due diligence is recommended before entering into any agreement with an advertiser. The Shepherd Express will not be held liable for any damages of any kind relating to any ad. Please check your ad the first day of publication and notify us of any changes. We are not responsible for errors in advertising after the first day. We reserve the right to edit, reject or reclassify advertisements in our sole discretion, without notice.

We do not knowingly accept advertisements that discriminate or intend to discriminate on any illegal basis, or are otherwise illegal. NO REFUNDS for cancellation after deadline, no copy changes except to price or telephone number.

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S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7 | 39

PLAYING WITHBy James FIRE Barrick

THEME CROSSWORD

PSYCHO SUDOKU! “Kaidoku”

Each of the 26 letters of the alphabet is represented in this grid by a number between 1 and 26. Using letter frequency, word-pattern recognition, and the numbers as your guides, fill in the grid with well-known English words (HINT: since a Q is always followed by a U, try hunting down the Q first). Only lowercase, unhyphenated words are allowed in kaidoku, so you won’t see anything like STOCKHOLM or LONG-LOST in here (but you might see AFGHAN, since it has an uncapitalized meaning, too). Now stop wasting my precious time and SOLVE! psychosudoku@gmail.com 16

20

20 1

23

20

25

1

17

25

75. Social class 77. B.B. King’s specialty 78. Thank goodness!

79. Mauna — 80. Rive 81. Park ranger’s concern 83. Maid — 85. Hirt and Pacino 86. Pindarics 88. Hard to locate 89. Part 4 of quip: 3 wds.

91. Relates 93. Jewish holy day 94. Some votes 95. Trilled 96. Fish and dairy 97. “The Gift of the —” 99. End of the quip: 3 wds.

102. — Spumante 103. Printed anew 107. Part of NB 108. Complication 110. Exploits 112. Start of many stories 113. Eurasian river 114. Solely 115. Hunter of myth 116. Lab animals 117. Three-pip card 118. Homegrown 119. John — Garner 120. Old flames DOWN 1. Stripe 2. Two-toed sloth 3. Minced oath 4. Infernal 5. Sierra — 6. Eaglewood 7. Motion picture 8. Mature 9. Brings to light 10. Hebrew letter 11. Habituate 12. Coq au —

13. Jai — 14. Sensory receptor: 2 wds.

15. Stream of charged particles: 2 wds.

16. Area of New York City: 2 wds.

17. Wash 18. — Bator 28. Endocrine gland 30. A spice 32. Ames and Asner 34. Gist 36. Dawn goddess 37. The players: 2 wds.

38. Status quo — 39. Cringe 40. Workers’ rights agcy.

41. Noted essayist 42. Pricey 43. Run of cookies 44. Compilation 45. Unreactive 46. Money at risk 50. Cohen’s Sagdiyev 51. Hgt. 55. Good vitamin C source 57. Luxury car 59. Occident 60. Clay-pigeons sport 61. Run 64. Flirtatious ones

65. Oil jar 66. Value system 68. God of the winds 69. Understanding 71. Boat-shaped ornament 74. Canopies 75. Cut short 76. — -memoire 77. Muffin variety 78. Too proper 82. Master copy 83. Faithful follower 84. Genus of bees 87. Majestic 89. Reynolds or Lancaster 90. Malodorous 92. Emmet 93. Bunch 96. Animal life 97. Wine region of France 98. River in France 99. End at 100. Mister, in Munich 101. — shirt 103. Keep in check 104. Computer OS 105. — homo 106. Letters 109. Sawbones 111. Sports stat.

Solution to last week’s puzzle

I T B L H N G C U

C H G B U I L T N

U N L C G T B H I

N C H I T B U G L

B L U G N C H I T

G I T U L H C N B

11

6 16

14

20

16

6 2

24

19

8

15 22

17

17

23 23

20

23

19

7

9

9

4

8

24

1

11

23

23

23

19

6

17

12

8

20

15

26

23

26

10

12

4

9

9

23

24

6

17

23 12

21

20

23 19

17

17

23

6

18

13

5

13 19

20 6

6 16

6 26

2

19 16

6

13

6

23

8

9 2

23

6

25 23

20

23 19 6 23

15

22

9/7 Solution

WORD FIND This is a theme puzzle with the subject stated below. Find the listed words in the grid. (They may run in any direction but always in a straight line. Some letters are used more than once.) Ring each word as you find it and when you have completed the puzzle, there will be 22 letters left over. They spell out the alternative theme of the puzzle.

Cast a Line Solution: 22 Letters

© 2017 Australian Word Games Dist. by Creators Syndicate Inc.

© 2017 United Feature Syndicate, Dist. by Andrews McMeel Syndication

ACROSS 1. Chums 5. Pearl River region 10. Couch 15. Simple dwelling: Var. 19. Branch of biol.

20. Straighten 21. Old-womanish 22. — Roberts University 23. Not one 24. Recipient 25. Calendar type 26. Saint Petersburg’s river 27. Cotton fabric 29. Part of CSA: Abbr.

31. Start of a quip by anonymous: 2 wds.

33. Day in March or May 34. Chatter 35. Paradise 36. Jewish month 38. Next after gee 39. Vacillated 43. Part 2 of quip: 3 wds.

46. Just as 47. Race distance 48. Genus of macaws 49. Fractional parts 50. Vadodara, previously 52. DC acronym 53. Male 54. “Death in the Family” author 55. Reasoning 56. Mudflow from Vesuvius 58. Data-gathering program 60. Temptress 61. R-W link 62. Abominate 63. Part 3 of quip: 2 wds.

67. Oblique line: Abbr.

70. “— It Romantic?”

72. Welcome 73. On-screen preview

T U I H B G N L C

3 23

9 6

H B N T C L I U G

23

2 8

13

L G C N I U T B H

24 19

20

18 18

19 23

Aerator Anchor Bass Cod Concentration Coral trout Crab Danger Dart Dogtooth tuna Drummer Eels Fly rod Fork

Fresh Gaff Gut Hook Ice Inshore Island Jew Longline Lure Mako Mollusc Moray Net

Octopus Outboard Patience Pike Prawning trawler Radar Reel Salt Sea Tench Weights Worms

40 | S E P T E M B E R 1 4 , 2 0 1 7

9/7 Solution: Fondly looking back on my life SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Solution: My favourite fishing spot

Creators Syndicate 737 3rd Street • Hermosa Beach, CA 90254 310-337-7003 • info@creators.com

Date: 9/14/17

::NEWS OF THE WEIRD

::FREEWILLASTROLOGY ::BY ROB BREZSNY VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In the coming weeks, you might want to read the last few pages of a book before you decide to actually dive in and devour the whole thing. I also suggest you take what I just said as a useful metaphor to apply in other areas. In general, it might be wise to surmise the probable outcomes of games, adventures and experiments before you get totally involved. Try this fun exercise: Imagine you are a psychic prophet as you evaluate the long-range prospects of any influences that are vying to play a role in your future.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “Dear Dr. Astrology: I’m feeling lost, but am also feeling very close to finding my new direction. It hurts!

It would be so helpful if I could just catch a glimpse of that new direction. I’d be able to better endure the pain and confusion if I could get a tangible sense of the future happiness that my pain and confusion are preparing me for. Can you offer me any free advice?

—Lost Libra.” Dear Libra: The pain and confusion come from the dying of the old ways. They need to die a bit more before the new direction will reveal itself clearly. I predict that will happen soon—no later than Oct. 1.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Welcome to “Compose Your Own Oracle,” a special edition of Free Will Astrology. Departing from tradition, I’m temporarily stepping aside so you can have the freedom to write the exact horoscope you want. Normally, you might be in danger of falling victim to presumptuous arrogance if you imagined you could wield complete control over how your destiny unfolds. But in the days ahead, that rule won’t be as unyielding, because cosmic forces will be giving you more slack than usual. Fate and karma, which frequently impel you to act according to patterns that were set in place long ago, are giving you at least a partial respite. To get the maximum benefit out of “Compose Your Own Oracle,” identify three plot developments you’d like to weave into a self-fulfilling prophecy for your immediate future. Then, start weaving.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Almost two-thirds of us confess that if we are alone, we might sip milk directly from the carton rather than first pouring it into a glass. Fourteen percent of us have used milk as part of our sexual activities. One out of every five of us admit that we have “borrowed” someone else’s milk from the fridge at work. Most shockingly, four percent of us brag that we have blown milk out our noses on purpose.

I expect that in the next two weeks, you Sagittarians will exceed all these norms. Not just because you’ll be in the mood to engage in mischievous experiments and playful adventures with milk, but because you’re likely to have a loosey-goosey relationship with almost everything.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The coming weeks will be an excellent time for you to raise funds in support of political prisoners, or to volunteer at a soup kitchen, or to donate blood at a blood bank. In fact, any charitable service you perform for people you don’t know will be excellent for your physical and mental health. You can also generate vivid blessings for yourself by being extra thoughtful, kind and generous toward people you care for. You’re in a phase of your astrological cycle when unselfish acts will yield maximum selfish benefits.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In his novel The Jungle, muckraker Upton Sinclair (18781968) exposed the abominable hygiene and working conditions of the meat-packing industry. The uproar that followed led to corrective legislation by the U.S. Congress. Sinclair remained devoted to serving the public good throughout his career. He liked to say that the term “social justice” was inscribed on his heart. Drawing from his inspiration, Aquarius, I suggest you decide what your soul’s main motto is— and imagine that it is written on your heart. Now is a perfect moment in time to clarify your life’s purpose, and intensify your commitment to it—to devote even more practical, tender zeal to fulfilling the reason you were born.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You know that “patch of bothersome weeds” growing right in the middle of your life? Is it re-

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

ally a patch of bothersome weeds? Or is it perhaps a plot of cultivated blooms that once pleased you, but has now turned into a puzzling irrelevancy? Or, how about this possibility: Is it a chunk of languishing beauty that might flourish and please you again if it were cared for better? Those are excellent questions for you to pose in the coming days, Pisces. According to my interpretation of the astrological omens, it’s time for you to decide on the future of this quizzical presence.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Two animals are pictured prominently on Australia’s coat of arms: the kangaroo and the large flightless bird known as the emu. One of the reasons they were chosen is that both creatures rarely walk backward.

They generally move forward or not at all. Australia’s founders wanted this to symbolize the nation’s pledge to never look back, to remain focused on advancing toward the future. The coming weeks will be a favorable time for you to make a similar commitment, Aries. Is there a new symbol you might adopt to inspire your intention?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “The Simpsons” is an animated sitcom that will soon begin its 29th consecutive year on TV. During its run, it has told more than 600 stories. The creators of another animated sitcom, “South Park,” once did an episode entitled “Simpsons Already Did It,” which referenced their feelings that it was hard to come up with new tales because their rival had already used so many good ones. I bring this up, Taurus, because I suspect your life story will soon be spinning out novel plots that have never before been seen, not even on “The Simpsons” or “South Park.”You could and should be the Best Storyteller of the Month.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Love won’t exactly be free in the coming weeks, but there should be some good deals. And I’m not referring to risky black-market stuff obtained in back alleys, either. I mean straightforward liaisons and intriguing intimacy at a reasonable cost. So if you’re comfortably mated, I suggest you invest in a campaign to bring more comedy and adventure into your collaborative efforts. If you’re single, wipe that love-starved look off your face and do some exuberant window-shopping. If you’re neither comfortably mated nor single, money may temporarily be able to buy you a bit more happiness.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): The current state of your fate reminds me of the sweet confusion alluded to in Octavio Paz’s poem “Between Going and Staying”: “All is visible and elusive, all is near and can’t be touched.” For another clue to the raw truth of your life right now, I’ll quote the poet William Wordsworth. He spoke of “fleeting moods of shadowy exultation.” Is the aura described

by Paz and Wordsworth a problem that you should try to fix? Is it detrimental to your heroic quest? I don’t think so. Just the opposite, really: I hope you can hang out for a while in this pregnant mystery—between the yes and the no, between the dark and the light, between the dream and the reality. It will help you learn what you’ve been too restless to tune in to in the past.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The imminent future will be a favorable time for refurbished models and revived originals. They are likely to be more fun and interesting the second time around. I suspect that this will also be an auspicious phase for substitutes and alternatives. They may even turn out to be better than the so-called real things they replace. So, be artful in formulating Plan B and Plan C, Leo. Switching over to backups may ultimately bring out more of the best in you and whisk you toward your ultimate goal in unexpected ways.

Homework: Are you ready for an orgy of gratitude?

Identify 10 of your best blessings. Tell me all about it at freewillastrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

::BY THE EDITORS OF ANDREWS MCMEEL

Seniors Gone Weird

G

uests at the Macdonald Loch Rannoch Hotel in Scotland were terrorized by Robert Fergus, 72, and his wife, Ruth, 69, in February when the couple rampaged through the lobby with scissors and threatened to shoot other guests. The incident apparently began when Mrs. Fergus pounded on a hotel room door at 1:45 a.m., leading the guest within to call front desk staff, who Mrs. Fergus told her husband treated her “with hostility.” That’s when Mr. Fergus “reacted disproportionately” by running naked into the lobby with scissors, cutting communications cables and shouting that he would “slit” and “kill” onlookers. Meanwhile, Mrs. Fergus told staff she was going to “get a gun and shoot” them, according to prosecutor Michael Sweeney. Staff and guests ran out of the hotel, while Mr. and Mrs. Fergus returned to their room to pack and took off in their BMW. They were apprehended when they flagged down a police car to accuse the hotel staff of abusing them, and Mr. Fergus could not pass a breath test. At their sentencing on Sept.

1, their attorneys blamed overconsumption of alcohol for their behavior. Nonetheless, they were fined 4,100 pounds and ordered to pay 800 pounds to cover the cost of damage to the hotel.

in this type of behavior “are looking for excitement through unusual ways.”

What’s in a Name?

The state administration for industry and commerce in China has had to put its foot down about long, ridiculous names for companies.

New guidelines prohibit long-winded company names, such as “There Is a Group of Young People With Dreams Who Believe They Can Make the Wonders of Life Under the Leadership of Uncle Niu Internet Technology Co. Ltd.” This company in northern China (which makes condoms) will now be known as just “Uncle Niu.”

Bee-ing Grateful

Emily Mueller, 33, of Ohio asked a photographer friend, Kendrah Damis, to take pictures of her pregnant with her fourth child—and while covered in 20,000 bees. Mueller, who is a beekeeper, checked with her doctor before the photo session and was stung three times during the shoot. She said she associates bees with life and death. “Bees came into my life in a time that we had just suffered a miscarriage,” Mueller said.

“That’s where everything fell into place for me, when honeybees entered my life.” She hopes the maternity photos will highlight the importance of bees. © 2017 Andrews McMeel Syndication

Remorse Rocks!

An anonymous Australian tourist mailed back a small stone he lifted from the Cwmhir Abbey in Wales, a Cistercian monastery founded in 1176, in August. The thief included a note explaining his remorse: “I have been an avid follower of the Welsh kings and their history, and so I took this rock. Ever since, I have had the most awful luck as if Llewellyn (sic) himself was angry with me.” Llywelyn ap Gruffudd, the last native prince of Wales, was beheaded and buried at the abbey in 1282, and legend says his ghost haunts the abbey. The trust that manages the abbey put the returned stone and the note on display—presumably to deter future stickyfingered visitors.

A Singular Obsession

In Wenzhou City, China, an 11-year-old boy underwent surgery in August to remove 26 magnetic Buckyballs from his penis. The balls caused a blockage in the boy’s urethra, which caused bleeding and swelling. He told pediatrician Wang Yongbiao that he put the toys in his penis because he was “curious.” (Bonus: The boy was identified in news reports as “Pi Pi.”) An unnamed 35-year-old man in Liaoning Province, China, was rushed to the hospital with intense pain and bloody urine in June, after having inserted sewing needles into his penis over the past year. It took doctors at the General Hospital of Shenyang Military Region about 90 minutes to remove 15 needles, which each measured from two to four inches long. The urologist, Dr. Cao Zhiqiang, said patients who engage

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THEBACK::ARTFORART’SSAKE

Clown Jewels ::BY ART KUMBALEK

I

’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a? So listen, as right-wing cracker-jackanape jackboots goose-step inside 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and thereabouts, I’ve decided it would be more patriotic of me to forgo whipping out a bombastic blowhard essay and instead patronize an Americanly small business whose customer service cannot be cheaply outsourced to some godforsaken outpost outside the Lower 48, what the fock.

So I’m off to the Uptowner tavern/charm school majestically crammed onto the corner of wistfully hysteric Humboldt Boulevard and the fabled Center Street. Tag along if you like, but you cover the first round. Let’s get going.

Little Jimmy Iodine: All I’m saying is that if I owned a major league team, as part of my 9/11 hoopla I would’ve hauled out a handcuffed, naked Dick Cheney and had him waterboarded at home plate following the top half of the seventh inning.

Emil: God bless America. This 9/11, there’s got to be a bright side to it somewheres, ain’a?

Julius: Such as?

Emil: Cripes, like maybe if you were a guy and that was your wedding anniversary, it would be easier to remember it.

Herbie: I can buy that. Association. Whenever the anniversary of a disaster tragedy rolls around, like your Pearl Harbor, your Hiroshima, your Hurricane Katrina, the dark day I got focking married springs to my mind right off the bat.

Ray: The association—that’s how I remember things, too. Like whenever I see the bartender come down to this end of the bar, I remember it’s time to have another focking cocktail.

Ernie: There’s the disasters you can bring on by mistakes you don’t even know you’re making and there’s disasters that happen no matter what you do.

Like these asteroids flying around outer space. I read in the papers that it wouldn’t matter what side of the bed you got out of in the morning, a space rock the size of about three football fields across would wipe out everything and everyone in a space the size of New focking Jersey. The Sopranos, Atlantic City, chemical dumps, Bruce Springsteen, on-the-take goombah politicians—bada bing! bada boom!—all gone in a New York second on account of Mother Nature got up on the wrong side of the bed that day.

Emil: Im-focking-possible ’cause Mother Nature’s got nothing to do with outer space stuff.

Julius: The hell. Listen Einstein, we the sapien Homo and the rest of the life on this planet all got its beginnings in outer space, so shut the fock up if you’re going to talk like a sausage out of your anus.

Ray: Speaking of “talking out of your anus...�

Little Jimmy Iodine: Hey, Artie! Over here. Put a load on your keister.

Art: Hey gents. What do you hear, what do you know.

Julius: I hear that the Republicans are champing at the bit for big-ass tax cuts except for the mom-and-pop regular Joes struggling to maintain a pot to pee in—tax cuts only for the fat-cat uber-rich assholes who bankroll the campaigns of congressional Tea Party types to destroy truth, justice and the American way.

Herbie: Remember when they had that idea of an “ownership society,� which means Congress Republicans and their donor pals own all the money and all

the power, and the rest of us baboons own a one-way ticket to Palooka-focking-ville Art: I got to tell you’s guys before I forget about this documentary I saw on TV called “Superheroes,� where everyday guys and gals who act like they’re Batman go out to fight crime.

Little Jimmy Iodine: I’ve been out of touch with that stuff, but I heard Superman and Lois Lane finally got married, didn’t they? I always wondered if they ever got around to having any kids. I mean, how the heck do you breast-feed a baby with the superhuman power of suck?

Emil: I’d like to know how the hell they ever got a marriage license in the first place. The guy was from another focking planet for crying out loud. Wouldn’t you think there’d be some kind of law or an amendment against that kind of thing? For christ sakes, an Earth woman having a connubial relationship of a conjugal nature with a creature from outer focking space—a creature prone to wearing colorful leotards

4 UI 4U 'SBOLMJO 8*

and a cape in public?

Herbie: That’s a difficult question. I think it may be focking fair to consider anyone from outer space to be of another species. While to carry on a relationship of an intimate nature with a member of another species may be perfectly acceptable onstage at select entertainment venues just south of the Texas border, I don’t think an inter-species life-partnering union would play in Peoria, nor with the Christian right nutbags who helped put Trumpel-thinskin in the White House.

Ernie: No shit, ’cause I’ll bet you a buck twoeighty Superman was a Democrat.

Emil: How do you figure that?

Ernie: Because numbnuts, he was always helping and saving people no matter how much money they made.

(Hey, it’s getting late and I know you got to go, but thanks for letting us bend your ear, ’cause I’m Art Kumbalek and I told you so.)

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