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FEATURES | POLLS | TAKING LIBERTIES | ISSUE OF THE WEEK

Please Vote: April 3rd

STATE TREASURER REFERENDUM

VOTE: NO

There is a referendum on the ballot that would change the state constitution and eliminate the independently elected state treasurer that has existed for the past 170 years since the birth of the State of Wisconsin. Among the many original functions intended by Wisconsin’s founders, the state treasurer was to be our independent fiscal watchdog. The Republicans have slowly taken many of the functions away from the state treasurer, weakening the office and then arguing that it should be eliminated.

Eliminating the state treasurer would make it easier for politicians to play fast and loose with our state tax dollars. Former Republican State Treasurer Jack Voight is campaigning hard for a NO vote on this referendum because eliminating the office, he said, “will silence the financial voice of our state and silence the checks and balances.” If the right wing prevails and eliminates the state treasurer, we would be the only state without an independently elected state treasurer, auditor or comptroller.

It is bad enough that our legislature passes major pieces of legislation, usually to benefit some special interest at the expense of the taxpayers, in the middle of the night with no name of the author attached.

They now want to eliminate someone who is looking over their shoulders. Legislators, both Democrats and Republicans, are guilty of these midnight amendments to the state budget, which is the only real “must pass” bill.

This amendment is an invitation to corruption and will cost the state taxpayers millions and millions of dollars if we shoot the watchdog. Please vote NO.

STATE SUPREME COURT

REBECCA DALLET

The Shepherd Express Editorial Committee strongly and enthusiastically endorses Rebecca Dallet for the vacant seat on the Wisconsin State Supreme Court. She has been a public servant her entire working career, serving 11 years as a Milwaukee County prosecutor and 10 years as a Milwaukee County judge. Judge Dallet is viewed as a liberal-leaning moderate jurist running against an extremist.

Dallet has a reputation for integrity and high ethical standards.

Her opponent is an ideologically extreme right-wing Republican.

As an attorney, he represented serious environmental polluters, he was on Gov. Scott Walker’s legal team that defended the controversial Act 10, and he worked with the Republicans to draw gerrymandered legislative districts so extreme that they were declared to be unconstitutional by a panel of three federal judges—one Democratic and two Republican appointees.

He also has a history of extreme right-wing activism, which has gotten him arrested multiple times for blocking access to abortion clinics. He does not apologize for or regret the actions that brought his arrests. Apparently, he only obeys the laws he likes, which is exactly what you don’t want in any judge, especially not in a Wisconsin Supreme Court justice.

In this election he is receiving out-of-state special interest money to the tune of almost $2 million dollars, dwarfing the money he has raised from Wisconsin voters. To make matters worse, he has declared that, if elected, he will not recuse himself when these rightwing interest groups, who paid for his campaign, come before the court. How do you spell “totally corrupt”? This should be an easy choice.

4 | MARCH 29, 2018

Milwaukee County Endorsements

(left to right) Theo Lipscomb, Steven Shea, Steve Taylor, Sparkle Ashley

DISTRICT ONE: THEO LIPSCOMB DISTRICT SEVEN: KENNETH GINLACK SR. or FELESIA MARTIN DISTRICT EIGHT: STEVEN SHEA DISTRICT NINE: STEVE TAYLOR DISTRICT 18: SPARKLE ASHLEY

You may be wondering why we are having Milwaukee County supervisor elections when we had them just two years ago, and why these elections are being held when the county executive is not also up for re-election.

The answer is that, in his efforts to consolidate power, Milwaukee County Executive Chris Abele worked with the Republicans who control both chambers of the state legislature to draft legislation that would weaken the checks and balances on the county executive.

This was done by taking various powers away from the Milwaukee County Board of Supervisors, giving various unchecked, unilateral powers to the county executive such as the ability to sell off any county property except the parks, drastically cutting the salaries and eliminating all of their benefits (including health insurance) for the county supervisors and, finally, shortening their terms to just two years. Despite these more limited powers, the county board has still managed to provide some very important checks on the irresponsible spending by the county executive.

Still unhappy and seeking even more control, Abele is now trying to buy county supervisors. This new and very dangerous twist of Abele’s father’s money entering the Milwaukee County supervisor races has a corrupting influence. As we have seen in Abele’s own elections, his father’s money is used primarily for nasty, negative and deceptive ads. Abele has set up an independent expenditure committee so he can avoid campaign contribution limits. He is now spending several hundred thousand dollars on at least five races.

Unfortunately, money plays a very important role in elections. As you might recall, when Abele was on track to lose his April 2016 reelection, he dug deep into to his billionaire father’s wallet and spent well over Endorsements continued on page 6 >

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MARCH 2 9, 2 0 18 ! 5

NEWS&VIEWS::ENDORSEMENTS > Endorsements continued from page 4

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$5 million—both directly and indirectly—on a vicious, negative and deceptive reelection campaign against State Sen. Chris Larson. Milwaukee County elections were never like this prior to Abele coming in with his virtually unlimited East Coast money. He has used his father’s money to buy his elections, and now he wants to use that money to buy a county board beholden to him. This is not healthy for our democracy. So look carefully at the negative ads you see, because they are probably lies and probably paid for by Abele.

Below, we have made endorsements in five Milwaukee County supervisor elections. Of the 18 county supervisor districts, 11 have incumbents with no opposition, leaving seven contested races. The Shepherd Express, having studied the candidates, is making endorsements in five of the seven contested races.

Milwaukee County Board of Supervisors District One: The Shepherd strongly endorses Theo Lipscomb for reelection. Supervisor Lipscomb has chaired the county board in a difficult time as the Republican-controlled state legislature and Gov. Walker have severely weakened the role of that board to provide the needed checks and balances to the county executive, Chris Abele, a man who likes to take care of his wealthy friends. Despite their weakened position, Lipscomb and the county board have stopped Abele from putting parking meters in our public parks and from trying to privatize various aspects of county government. They stopped Abele from turning over the Milwaukee County Transit System to a Texas company in a sweetheart deal. It’s work such as this that has earned Theo our strong endorsement.

District Seven: This is an open seat since the current incumbent, Michael Mayo, has chosen not to run for reelection. The voters in the seventh district are fortunate to have two qualified candidates before them; the Shepherd sees enough strength in both individuals to do a dual endorsement. We believe that either Kenneth Ginlack Sr. or Felesia Martin would be a good addition to the Milwaukee County Board of Supervisors. Briefly, Ginlack has a master’s degree in social work and has been active in the community through extensive work with individuals

live from turner hall 7:30 pm April 19

Local Suburban Elections We usually do not spend much time on the local suburban elections. However, this cycle, there are a number of races that the Shepherd Express Editorial Committee views as important to the concept of honest and well-functioning local government. There are a total of five endorsements from three suburbs.

Shorewood Village President: Paul Zovic Village Trustee: McKenzie Edmonds Village Trustee: Jessica Carpenter

$25 tickets at wpr.org/presents

!"#$%!"#$%&'$()*+,%*-% % % % &'"($)""*% !+,,-.$% /(01#$$% ./0'1(20*( 234567859:;&<:;5=::>?3:2 !"#$%!&'(!)*!+($,-%.!'&!/01,-2$,!3%4'-%.5!

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6 | MARCH 29, 2018

suffering from mental health issues and alcohol and other drug abuse problems. Martin has been an active volunteer in the community for decades and has been employed in an administrative capacity at the Medical College of Milwaukee.

District Eight: The Shepherd enthusiastically endorses Steven Shea, who has been civically active in Milwaukee County’s south suburban communities. For the past 22 years, Shea has worked at Milwaukee Area Technical College teaching and working with students—many of whom are dislocated workers, veterans and individuals with physical challenges. Very important: His opponent’s campaign has received between $100,000 and $200,000 from Abele— many times the amount of money he received from his voters. If elected, we fear that the other candidate will have been bought and paid for by Abele; his loyalties will be with the person who owns him and not the voters of the eighth district.

District Nine: The Shepherd endorses Steve Taylor for his reelection. Taylor is willing to speak out and verbally fight hard for what he supports. He is willing to stand up and fight against Abele’s abuses and mismanagement of our county resources. As a result, Abele has targeted him by putting between $100,000 and $200,000 into his opponent’s campaign so he can elect a supervisor beholden to him. If you begin to see negative attacks against Taylor, they are probably paid for with Abele money and their accusations will be lies.

District 18: This election is perhaps one of the most important of the county supervisor races.

The challenger who the Shepherd is strongly endorsing, Sparkle Ashley, is not well known and has been attacked by the right wing. She is running against the person who many believe— and the Shepherd agrees—is the absolute worst supervisor currently on the board. Talking with Ms. Ashley or seeing her speak from the podium, you have to be impressed. She is smart, articulate and a social worker by profession. She has seen firsthand and on a daily basis the barriers that people who are down face when they try to get the help they need to get back on their feet.

Sparkle Ashley would be an excellent addition to the Milwaukee County Board and would replace someone who should retire.

Oak Creek Mayor: Daniel J. Bukiewicz Brown Deer Village Trustee: Wanda Montgomery Comment at !"#$"#%&#'$%#!!()*+.

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Pundamonium: The Milwaukee Pun Slam $8

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4/8 Vundabar, Ratboys, Mark Waldoch 4/11 Stephen Jay, Jim ì Kimoî West 4/12 Marbin 4/13 No Quarter 4/14 An Evening with Neal Morse 4/15 The Ike Willis Project with Micki Free 4/16 Lindi Ortega, Hugh Masterson

A Great Time For Milwaukee

D&-%68)# ($# =6)# $(4&# "!-# <-!!1)# $!# 4!H&# !+?# 3(H&+# $%&# )($56$(!+# (+# V$:# P!5()f# cd# =6+$# $!#9&#86-$#!"#6#H&-2#&I*($(+3#46-1&$#6$#6#$(4&# !"#6+#&I80!)(H&#3-!=$%#)85-$?e#%&#)62)#!"#%()# 7&*()(!+#$!#*!4&#$!#;(0=651&&:#cd$/)#+!$#$%6$# &H&-2$%(+3# ()# -!)2# %&-&?e# %&# *!+$(+5&)?# 677> ing that his mission during his first months has 9&&+#$!#4&&$#$%&#*($2/)#95)(+&))#6+7#8!0($(*60# 0&67&-)?#%()#$&+6+$)#6+7#&H&+#%()#*!48&$($!-):# c<5$#(+#600#$%&)&#4&&$(+3)?#=%6$#d#%&6-#()#$%&# &+$%5)(6)4#"!-#=%6$/)#3!(+3#!+:#J%&#&+3(+&#()# 3!(+3#"6)$&-#6+7#"6)$&-:#d/H&#=!-1&7#(+#46+2# 46-1&$)?# 6+7# d/H&# +&H&-# &I8&-(&+*&7# )5*%# 6# unified, contagious enthusiasm. In St. Louis, 8&!80&# !"$&+# *!486-&7# $%&4)&0H&)# 8!!-02# $!# 806*&)#0(1&#,%(*63!:#d/H&#+&H&-#%&6-7#6+2!+&# (+#;(0=651&&#)62?#gd#=()%#=&#=&-&#,%(*63!h/e J%&#-&*!-7#!"#%()#$(4&#(+#V$:#P!5()#)533&)$)# 6# 46+# =%!# 461&)# W5(*1# 7&*()(!+)# 6+7# 0(1&)# $!# 3&$# $%(+3)# 7!+&:# cd# 7!+/$# 0(H&# (+# $%&# 86)$?# 95$#d#=6+$#$!#0&6-+#"-!4#$%&#86)$#6+7#+!$#-&8> 0(*6$&#$%&#4()$61&)?e#%&#)62):#cJ%&#'()*!+)(+# ,&+$&-#.()$-(*$#%6)#+!$#9&&+#-5+#6)#6#95)(+&))# 95$#4!-&#6)#6#3!H&-+4&+$#&+$($2:#V!4&#$%(+3)# )&&4# $!# %6H&# 9&&+# %6+70&7# H&-2# -(3(702:# d+# !-7&-#$!#3-!=?#2!5#*6+/$#3&$#9!33&7#7!=+#(+# 8-!*&)):#'%6$#d/H&#9&&+#%&6-(+3#(+#$%&#*!4> munity is that the District has been difficult to 7!#95)(+&))#=($%:#d#=6+$#;(0=651&&#$!#1+!=# =%!#=&#6-&:#'&#+&&7#$!#8-!4!$&#!5-#9-6+7)C $%&# '()*!+)(+# ,&+$&-?# $%&# ;(00&-# O(3%# P("&# J%&6$&-?# $%&# D6+$%&-#E-&+6C$!# (+*-&6)&# 6+7# (48-!H&#6+7#3&$#8&!80&#.!=+$!=+:e !"##$%&'(&')*$+*$,-$.+,$))/0"#:#n MARCH 29, 2018 | 7

NEWS&VIEWS::SAVINGOURDEMOCRACY ( MARCH 29 - APRIL 4, 2018 )

!

he Shepherd Express serves as a clearinghouse for all activities in the greater Milwaukee area that peacefully push back against discriminatory, reactionary or authoritarian actions and policies of the Donald Trump administration, as well as other activities by all those who seek to thwart social justice. We will publicize and promote actions, demonstrations, planning meetings, teach-ins, partybuilding meetings, drinking-discussion get-togethers and any other actions that are directed toward fighting back to preserve our liberal democratic system.

Thursday, March 29

Raising Wages and Building Worker Power Candidate Forum @ Amalgamated Transit Union (734 N. 26th St.), 6-8 p.m.

Democratic candidates for governor, including Matt Flynn, Andy Gronik, Bob Harlow, Mike McCabe, Mahlon Mitchell, Kelda Roys, Paul Soglin and Dana Wachs, will participate in a discussion hosted by the Milwaukee Area Service and Hospitality Workers Organization. The candidates will discuss their plans to raise wages and build worker power.

RealQTalks: Oversexualization and Infantilization @ UWM LGBT Resource Center (2200 E. Kenwood Blvd.), noon-1 p.m.

LGBTQ people are oftentimes faced with the dichotomy of being either oversexualized or infantilized by their oppressors. This discussion will focus on the stem of these

stereotypes—micro-aggressions that contribute to this mindset and solutions to this problem.

Friday, March 30

Geography Colloquium: Mapping Prejudice in Minneapolis @ UW-Milwaukee Golda Meir Library (2311 E. Hartford Ave.), 3-4 p.m.

The Geographic Information Systems Club at UW-Milwaukee will host Kevin EhrmanSolberg, a project manager for the Mapping Prejudice Project in Minneapolis, for a discussion on tracing the history of racial covenants in Minneapolis.

Saturday, March 31

Voter and Civic Engagement Campaign @ Acción Ciudadana de Wisconsin (221 S. Second St.), 10 a.m.-1 p.m.

Acción Ciudadana de Wisconsin, Latino

Voting Bloc of Wisconsin and Citizen Action of Wisconsin have organized a weekly Saturday campaign of knocking on doors and phone banking to get people thinking about the 2018 elections. Volunteers can go out and talk to voters about the issues that they care about and get them involved in different events happening in the community.

Peace Action Wisconsin: Stand for Peace @ The corner of Kinnickinnic and Russell avenues, noon-1 p.m.

Every Saturday from noon-1 p.m., concerned citizens join with Peace Action Wisconsin to protest war and “Stand for Peace.”

Signs will be provided for those who need them. Protesters are encouraged to stick around for conversation and coffee afterward.

Monday, April 2

Riverwest Votes Happy Hour @ Riverwest Public House (815 E. Locust St.), 5-8 p.m.

Members of Riverwest Votes, a progressive citizen-led group based in the neighborhood, will hand out sample ballots and buttons, and talk about the April 3 election for Supreme Court Justice, Court of Appeals Judges and Circuit Court Judge.

Tuesday, April 3

Talking to Children About Race: Community Storytelling and Dialogue @ Christ Church Episcopal (5655 N. Lake Drive, Whitefish Bay), 5-8 p.m.

This event, which is a part of the Fellows and Facilitators Series, a partnership between the Frank Zeidler Center for Public Discussion and Ex Fabula, aims to teach participants practical tools to speak with children about race, racism and segregation.

John Dear Book Tour @ First Unitarian Society of Milwaukee (1342 N. Astor St.), 7-9 p.m.

Author, activist and Nobel Peace Prize nominee Father John Dear will speak about They Will Inherit the Earth: Peace and Nonviolence in a Time of Climate Change, his book on how our global epidemic of violence and war could only lead to catastrophic climate change.

To submit to this column, please send a brief description of your action, including date and time, to savingourdemocracy@shepex. com. Together, we can fight to minimize the damage that Donald Trump and others of his kind have planned for our great country.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com.!n

NEWS&VIEWS::POLL

You Believe Wisconsin Should Wait on Driverless Cars Last week we asked if, after a pedestrian was killed by a driverless car in Arizona, you believe that Wisconsin should allow driverless cars at this point. You said: n Yes: 25% n No: 75%

What Do You Say? Assuming that Stormy Daniels is telling the truth, do you think her allegations will seriously hurt Donald Trump? n Yes n No Vote online at shepherdexpress.com. We’ll publish the results of this poll in next week’s issue.

8 | MARCH 29, 2018

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::TAKINGLIBERTIES

Republicans Losing Their Battle Against Democracy ::BY JOEL MCNALLY

H

undreds of thousands of Americans joining demonstrations demanding intelligent gun regulations led by impassioned, young, high school students in Washington, D.C., and across the nation made me think of the rhythmic chant that repeatedly went up during similar massive demonstrations surrounding the Wisconsin State Capitol in Madison in 2011: “This is what democracy looks like!” It is, and it’s glorious.

But we also remember how those protests against Republican Gov. Scott Walker’s attempt to destroy union rights for teachers and other public employees ended. Walker not only succeeded in stripping public employees of their bargaining rights, but also won a recall election and then a second term.

So, why should those inspirational, young survivors fresh from a deadly mass shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Fla., be any more successful fighting intractable Republican politicians paid by the National Rifle Association not to protect the lives of their constituents? Actually, democracy is already answering that question.

Despite being in total control of the White House, both houses of Congress and a majority of the nation’s governors’ offices, Republicans are beginning to realize their ideas are currently so unpopular with the American people they really would rather not hold any more elections right now. It’s much too easy to attribute this to the historic low approval ratings of Donald Trump, whose blatant ignorance and indecency should have disqualified him from public office long ago. Besides, it lets off the hook Walker and all the other Republicans whose contempt for democracy preceded Trump’s.

Destroying Voting Rights Trump didn’t invent Republican attempts to destroy voting rights for black and brown people and anyone else more likely to vote for the Democratic Party than the Republican Party.

The same goes for the dishonest gerrymandering of voting districts into bizarre shapes, such as the tortured Pennsylvania congressional district thrown out as unconstitutional famously described as “Goofy Kicking Donald Duck.”

It’s easy to understand why Republicans don’t like democracy when they get wiped out in unlikely places such as Alabama and a Republican-gerrymandered Pennsylvania district Trump won by 20 points. Wisconsin joined SHEPHERD EXPRESS

the upsets in January when Democrat Patty Schachtner won a special state senate election by nine points in a rural Republican district along the Minnesota border that Trump won by 17 points.

That’s when Walker got his best, most undemocratic idea yet. If voters can’t be trusted to elect Republicans, why should the state even bother to schedule elections? Walker deserves credit for coming up with this idea first—even before Trump congratulated Russian President Vladimir Putin for winning reelection after barring his most popular opponent from the ballot and expressed admiration for Chinese President Xi Jinping’s appointment as president for life.

Walker got the chance to implement his innovative, new “no-election” policy for legislative vacancies when State Sen. Frank Lasee (De Pere) and State Rep. Keith Ripp (Lodi), both Republicans, resigned in December to take jobs in his administration. To prevent voters from joining the latest craze of electing Democrats, Walker decided to leave those seats vacant until the regular election in November for legislators taking office in January 2019.

It’s Against the Law, Walker Not all voters in those districts were happy about having no elected state senator or state representative for more than a year. And that damned Eric Holder, former attorney general under President Barack Obama, filed a lawsuit on behalf of those voters. As attorney general, Holder always made a big deal about voting rights. That’s no longer a problem under Trump’s attorney general, Jeff Sessions.

Holder nailed Walker on a legal technicality: namely, that state law required Walker to promptly call a special election to fill any legislative seat becoming vacant “before the second Tuesday in May in the year in which a regular election is held.” Walker tried to claim he didn’t have to follow the law because the vacancies occurred in 2017, not a regular election year.

Dane County Circuit Judge Joann Reynolds correctly called that interpretation absurd, since it would leave voters without representation even longer. Clearly, vacancies in December 2017 also come before the second Tuesday in May 2018. Judge Reynolds ruled that failing to schedule elections denied citizens their voting rights. “To state the obvious, if the plaintiffs have a right to vote for their representatives, they must have an election to do so,” Reynolds said.

Republicans immediately attacked Reynolds as an extreme, left-wing Dane County judge until they realized (whoops!) Walker appointed her to the bench. Nope. There’s nothing radical, extreme, left-wing or un-American about voting rights in a democracy. The radical, extreme, right-wing sabotage of voting rights, elections and democracy these days by so many Republicans is totally un-American.

The hundreds of thousands in the streets for the March for Our Lives across America were led by a generational wave of new, young voters and soon-to-be voters who reject the hypocrisy and dishonesty of adult politicians who fail to represent the best interests of their constituents.

Democracy is correcting itself.

Comment at !"#$"#%&#'$%#!!()*+. n

::ISSUEOFTHEWEEK

!"#$%&#'(% )*+,&-.'/% &.0%/'.(%./%1.-% .2.(%1-,+%3/% ./%4,//#56*78 ::BY STATE REP. EVAN GOYKE

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3#$(- >6:4- ?*@<#- 0!- );%%#41/@- !#%6048"0!-1"0%&-1#%+-04-1"#-A1:1#-B!!#+C/@-%#$%#7 !#41048-1"#-DE1"-B!!#+C/@-F0!1%0)1-*4-50/7 9:;<##G!-4*%1"-:4&-9#!1-!0&#!(-.%0*%-1*-"0!#/#)10*4-1*-1"#-B!!#+C/@H-?*@<#-!#%6#&-:!-:trial attorney in the Office of the Wisconsin A1:1#-.;C/0)-F#2#4&#%-04-50/9:;<##H-9"#%#"#-$%*60&#&-/#8:/-%#$%#!#41:10*4-1*-04&08#41&#2#4&:41!- 04- :- /:%8#- %:48#- *2- )%0+04:/):!#!(-I#-0!-:-JKKL-8%:&;:1#-*2-5:%M;#11#N406#%!01@-O:9-A)"**/( P*++#41-:1-!"#$"#%&#'$%#!!()*+(MARCH 29, 2018 | 9

::DININGOUT

For more Dining, log onto shepherdexpress.com

REV POP

FEATURE ! SHORT ORDER ! EAT/DRINK

Classic Eggs Benedict from Toast

Great New Places for Breakfast-Lunch and a Sad List of Restaurant Closings !::BY LACEY MUSZYNSKI

A new sports bar hopes to stick in Downtown, a popular burger bar gets a sister location and a playful brunch spot comes to Walker’s Point. But, the real news this month is the long, sad list of closings.

Peanut Butter & Jelly Deli

6125 W. Greenfield Ave. | 414-897-7987 thepbjdeli.com | $

A sandwich shop specializing in all things peanut butter and jelly has opened in West Allis. Peanut Butter & Jelly Deli grinds all their peanut and nut butters daily and sources their dozens of jams and jellies locally. Sandwiches range from simple to gourmet, and diners can choose to have their sandwiches toasted or grilled on 10 types of bread, including a gluten-free option. The Strawberry Lovers ($5.25) incorporates crunch honey-roasted peanut butter with strawberry jam and sliced strawberries for a classic combo. Grilled cheese and jelly ($4.25) includes your choice of jam or jelly grilled with sharp cheddar or American cheese. Two daily soups, coffee, tea and milkshakes are also available.

SportClub

750 N. Jefferson St. | 414-808-1588 sportclubmke.com | $$

A new sports bar has opened Downtown in the former Blackthorn Pub location that has been long vacant. SportClub is owned by Mike Eitel, also the owner of Nomad World Pub, which already acts as a de facto sports bar for soccer fans. The fully renovated space boasts a long bar, stadium seating area, a concession stand window, shuffle-

10 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

board and plenty of TVs in a vintage sports theme. The menu is brief and inspired by international street foods.

Filipino style pork egg rolls ($5.95) are served with Thai chili dipping sauce, and a large sharable mezze platter ($21.95) is made up of Mediterranean and Middle Eastern salads, dips and snacks. A breakfast menu is served for those early morning soccer matches, along with 30 tap beers.

Fat Dan’s Pizza & Sammiches

4241 S. Packard Ave. | 414-483-3287 $$ | fatdanspizza.com

A new restaurant with the motto “Fat is flavor, baby!” has opened in Saint Francis. Fat Dan’s serves up sandwiches, burgers and pizza all made from scratch. Meats and eggs come from local farms and are hormone and antibiotic free and local, organic produce is used as much as possible in season. Appetizers include the usual cheese bread ($6.50) with marinara sauce, and the less usual wild mushroom bruschetta ($6). Sandwiches range from hot Italian beef ($10.50) to the Garbage Pile ($14), a breakfast-like concoction of hash, eggs, cheese and meat on a homemade croissant. Pizza comes in build-your-own or a number of specialty styles, like the whole hog ($19-$27) with ham, bacon, pulled pork, caramelized onions and smoked Gouda.

Oscar’s Winner’s Circle 3800 W. Burnham St. 414-249-5701 | $-$$

The owners of Oscar’s Pub & Grill have opened a sister restaurant. Oscar’s Winner’s Circle takes its name from the building’s previous bar, the Winner’s Circle. The building

SportClub

has been completely remodeled in a modern vintage style with large windows, long bar and side patio. Though burgers are still the focus, the menu is different from the Pub location, with more Mexican and international influences.

The Gordo Burger ($7.75) tops the half-pound burger patty with chicharron in salsa verde, bacon, cheese and avocado, while the MKE Burger ($7.75) is topped with bacon, fried cheese curds, fried pickles, smoked cheddar and a fried egg. Sandwiches, salads, appetizers are also available, with brunch to be added soon. Forty taps behind the bar are filled with mostly local brews.

Toast

231 S. Second St. | 414-539-4179 $$ | toastmilwaukee.com

A breakfast, brunch and lunch spot has opened in the former Zak’s Café space. Toast is a whimsical, playful space with bright orange accent walls and colorful plates and coffee mugs. The menu includes starters, griddled items, tacos, breakfast sandwiches and benedicts. The maple bacon cinnamon roll pull apart bread ($4.95) smothered with a maple bacon glaze is an early favorite. Benedicts come in three styles: classic, poblano steak, and crab ($9.95-$14.95).

Pancake sliders ($13.95) use pancakes as the bread in sandwiches filled with eggs, bacon, beer cheese, hashbrowns and strawberry jam. A donut special is available daily, with flavors like Butterfinger and strawberry mango.

Restaurant Closures

This was also a brutal month for restaurant closures.

Longtime French favorite Coquette Café closed after 19 years. Wolf Peach closed its doors after the owner could not come to a lease agreement with the new owners of the building. Supper, owned by the same restaurateur, was also a casualty. Pleasant Kafe, Little DeMarinis, Silver Spring House, Buca di Beppo’s Southridge Mall location, Quaker Steak & Lube and Ruby Tuesday on Good Hope Road also closed. And finally, owner Thomas Hauck has announced that c. 1880 will be closing after April 28, citing financial fallout from the short-lived revitalization of Karl Ratzsch.

Is this an indication that the Milwaukee restaurant bubble is finally bursting? Only if the closings list is this long next month as well.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

!"#$#%&"#'%()*% Thi Cao

Chef, Buckley’s | 801 N. Cass St.

+,-./+.0.1$'!./2*!"/#%

Chef Thi Cao works the dinner shift at Buckley’s, so when he goes out to eat, it’s usually during lunch. When he goes out for Vietnamese, he sticks with Pho Cali and Pho Viet. “The pho broth at Pho Cali is so good that I don’t need to doctor the flavor with sriracha or hoisin,” he says. At Pho Viet, he gets bún bò hué, another noodle soup “that’s not well known, but for those that do, it’s so much better than pho. Pho Viet has the best broth for this dish.” When he does get the rare chance to go out to dinner, newcomer Birch + Butcher is a favorite. “That hearth!” he says. “I’m a fan of cooking anything over natural fire wood.

Plus Chef Miles Borghgraef’s menu is very creative and flavorful.”

DAVE ZYLSTRA

Pho Cali

4756 S. 27th St. 414-321-8886 phocaliwi.com

!"#$%&'( !"#$%&'%(')*+,,-)*-./0)1)2#3 !"#$%&'((%)"**+%,)'(+)$*&'( 4"5+')6)7-'$)8$%9)1):#3 %'!#$&'( ;-<=)-);%>.)%?)%>.)@.=9=.0)1)A#3 B+5=)C>'+D)1)EFG#3 H+""=.)7"%9&')1):FAI#3 ./"0(+!+1,%#$'23/$23#%#$(%!((4(5-. ,)25,2'(-%61%,$()$('-%(7)'(,,

Pho Viet

5475 S. 27th St. 414-282-8852 phovietmilwaukee.com

2.%!'00*,31$.2*345+,6789/%5/:83&/%!5 2.%!/'00*%

Birch + Butcher

459 E. Pleasant St. 414-323-7372 birchandbutcher.com

ì No Event We Caní t Handleî

Breakfast • Lunch • Dinner • Catering

Largest Fish Fry Selection in the Midwest Fish Fry EVERYDAY, ALL DAY during Lent!

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15419 W National Ave New Berlin, WI 53151

—BAKED OR FRIED—

CAN’T DECIDE? TRY A COMBO PLATE *All fish selections available Friday only or everyday with one day advance notice.

Tues-Thurs 4-11pm Fri-Sun 11am-11pm Dine-in & Carry Out | Reservations Accepted

WWW.THEPEACHTREECATERING.COM

517 N. Main Street Thiensville, WI 53092

Good Friday

Serving Fresh Canadian Smelt —COME EARLY AND COME OFTEN— 11am–5pm

WWW.PMCATERING.COM

Catering 414-803-5177 SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Best Seating Availability

5pm–8 pm Busy Time

8pm- 11pm

Good Seating Availability

-Live Music every Friday and Saturday-

84th and Lisbon (414) 871-3977 kamsthistleandshamrock.com M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 11

DININGOUT::EATDRINK

DININGOUT::SHORTORDER

COURTESY OF 1840 BREWING

!"#$%&'( )%*+,-'%( %(.,/( 0".),.1,-( 2"-(3-,%)( )%0"4

1840 Brewing Company

(::BY TARA LOVDAHL

SHEPHERD STAFF

The vibrant Kompali Taqueria (1205 E. Brady St.) is a fitting new edition to Milwaukee’s East Side. Visitors place their orders a la carte from meat, fish and vegetarian taco varieties. The Argentinian steak taco is worth writing home about. The meat is tender and dripping with self-actualization; this is steak as it was always meant to be. A lighter option, the Baja style fish taco, is delicately breaded and fried to a satisfying crunch. They offer many other alluring tacos, but I would go back to Kompali just for those two. Kompali boasts a fairly expansive drink menu, but you can’t go wrong with the house margarita. It’s the goldilocks blend of sweet and sour which is simply refreshing. This taqueria specializes in what it does best, and I would argue it’s a contender for some of Milwaukee’s best.

Kompali Taqueria

12 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

Rustic, Slow-Batch Brewing at 1840 Brewing Company ::BY SHEILA JULSON

1

!"#$%&'()*+$,-./0*123$415'$6'77'&$ !"#$"%"&'&#()'$&'*+"'),-'*('.(')+"/'$*' 0(1"&' *(' 23(450$/.' *+"$3' 65,#$*-7' (#4' )(3#4'!""3&')$*+'1(4"3/'*)$&*&8'95"'*(' *+"'#$1$*"4'65,/*$*$"&'(:'!""3&'*+"-'23(; 450"7'*+"-',3"'(/#-'(2"/'453$/.'*+"$3'25!#$0'!""3' 3"#",&"&7' +"#4' (/' *+"' &"0(/4' <,*534,-' (:' ",0+' 1(/*+8 =+"'!3")"3-'$&'#(0,*"4',*'>?@'A8'B,34'<*8'$/' ,/'$/0(/&2$05(5&'&2,0"'$/'C,-'D$")8'=+"3"E&'/(' &$./,."7',/4'D"**"3'3"#$"&'23$1,3$#-'(/')(34;(:; 1(5*+' ,/4' &(0$,#' 1"4$,' 23(1(*$(/8'=+"' !3"); "3-E&' DFG' 1"1!"3&' H&$1$#,3' *(' 03()4;&(530"4' $/%"&*(3&I'2,-','-",3#-'1"1!"3&+$2':""',/4'3"; 0"$%"',00"&&'*('23$%,*"'3"#",&"'2,3*$"&',/4'(*+"3' perks. VIPs also get first crack at all the beer 1,4"7')+"3",&'$:'(/"'0(1"&'$/'(/','25!#$0'3"; #",&"'4,-7'&(1"'!""3&'1$.+*'!"'&(#4'(5*8 =+"3"' ,3"' /(' *,2&' $/' *+"' ),317' )((4;#$/"4' &2,0"J' !""3' $&' &(#4' !-' *+"' .#,&&' (3' $/' KLM;(3' LMM;1$##$#$*"3' !(**#"&8' N,1$#-' &*-#"' &",*$/.' ,*' *+"' !,3' ,##()&' :(3' 2#"/*-' (:' &(0$,#$O,*$(/7' ,/4' 05&*(1"3&'0,/'&""'*+"'!,33"#&')+"3"'*+"'!""3'$&' ,."48'=+"'&2,0"'0,/',#&('!"'3"/*"4':(3'2,3*$"&',/4' "%"/*&8 <$/0"'(2"/$/.'*+$&'2,&*'P5.5&*7'QR?M'C3")$/.'

S(12,/-'+,&'3"#",&"4',!(5*'@M'%,3$"*$"&8'D"**"3' 2,3*/"3&' )$*+' (*+"3' #(0,#' !3")"3$"&' *(' ."*' )(3*' H5/:"31"/*"4' !""3I' 1,4"' )$*+' +$&' 3"0$2"&' ,/4' $/.3"4$"/*&8' D"**"3' ,/4' +$&' :5##;*$1"' "12#(-""7' !3")"3'=-#"3'T$##$2&7'*3,/&2(3*'*+"')(3*'*('QR?M' C3")$/.' S(12,/-' ,/4' 2512' $*'$/*(' !,33"#&' (3' &*,$/#"&&'&*""#'*,/U&8'V",&*'$&',44"47',/4'*+"':"3; 1"/*,*$(/'23(0"&&'!".$/&8

WB"E3"' 1(&*#-' ,' -",&*;43$%"/' !3")"3-7' &(' )"' 5&"' ,' 1$X' (:' )$#4' -",&*&' ,/4' ,' 0(0U*,$#' (:' (*+"3' !3")"3&' -",&*' *(' 03",*"' 4$::"3"/*' /5,/0"&' and unique flavors,” Vetter said. He owns 1840 C3")$/.' S(12,/-' )$*+' +$&' )$:"7' <*"2+,/$"8' =+"$3' Y,!3,4(3' 3"*3$"%"3' 1$X7' Y$#-7' ,#&(' .3""*&' %$&$*(3&8' D"**"3' 4"%"#(2"4' ,/' ,223"0$,*$(/' :(3' 03,:*' !3")$/.' )+$#"' #$%$/.' $/' S(#(3,4(7' )+$0+' &*,3*"4'"X2"3$"/0$/.','!((1'(:'03,:*'!3")"3&'$/' the early 2000s. Vetter was influenced by cre; ,*$%"'0(/0(0*$(/&'&50+',&'=(11-U/(0U"3'S3,:*' C3")"3-'Z'G5!E&'!3()/',#"')$*+'1,2#"'&-3528' He worked at Ska Brewing, and later at Aspen C3")$/.'S(12,/-7')+$#"'+"'#$%"4'$/'S(#(3,4(8 QR?ME&' N"!35,3-' FGP' 3"#",&"7' /,1"4' W=+"' Twenty Third” in honor of the Olympics, is ",&-;43$/U$/.')$*+'#()"3'0,3!(/,*$(/',/4'&5!*#"' .3,&&-7':35$*-'/(*"&8'F*E&','4$%"3."/0"':3(1'*+"$3' usual juicy, fruit heavy IPAs. Other past releases include “Rickety Elevator,” a saison made in col; #,!(3,*$(/')$*+'=+"'S3,:*"3'<2,0"',/4'S(12,/-' Brewing; and Sumerian Origin, kettle-soured )+",*',#"':"31"/*"4'$/'"$*+"3'0+,34(//,-7'!(53; !(/'(3'0,!"3/"*'!,33"#&8 WF'),/*'*('4('*+$/.&'*+,*',3"'/(*'!"$/.'4(/"' in Milwaukee,” Vetter said. “And being a small !5&$/"&&7'*+"3"E&'/('!(,34'(:'4$3"0*(3&'!3",*+$/.' down our necks, so we have that flexibility to sometimes make risky decisions.”

QR?M' C3")$/.E&' [,30+' 3"#",&"' ),&' 1,4"' $/' ,/'5/0(/%"/*$(/,#'),-\'=+"-'*((U'&*,%"&':3(1' ,':3"&+#-'4512"4'!(53!(/'!,33"#',/4'25*'*+"1' $/*(','&*,$/#"&&'&*""#':"31"/*"38'=+"-'2(53"4'*+"' )(3*'(%"3'*+"'&*,%"&7',44"4'*+"'-",&*',/4'#"*'$*' :"31"/*' )$*+' *+"' !(53!(/' &*,%"&' $/' *+"' *,/U8' F/.3"4$"/*&'&50+',&'0(#4'!3")'0(::""',/4'0,0,(' /$!'*",')"3"'#,*"3',44"48'W]()')"'+,%"'*+$&'3"; %"3&";"/.$/""3"4'!(53!(/'!,33"#'0+(0(#,*"'0(:; :""' &*(5*7' 1,4"' $/' ,' 0(12#"*"#-' /(/;*3,4$*$(/,#' way,” he said. =+"3"',3"'5&5,##-'*)('*(':(53'!""3&',%,$#,!#"' :(3' ",0+' 1(/*+#-' 3"#",&"8' QR?M' C3")$/.' S(1; 2,/-E&'N,0"!((U'2,."'+,&'$/:(31,*$(/',/4'%$4; "(&'(/')+,*'*+"'!3")"3-'$&'0533"/*#-')(3U$/.'(/8' ^20(1$/.' 3"#",&"&' $/0#54"' ,' )$/";!""3' +-!3$4' *+,*'),&'/",3#-','-",3'$/'*+"'1,U$/.8'D"**"3'&,$4' +"E&':3"65"/*#-',&U"4')+"/'0"3*,$/'!""3&')$##'!"' ,%,$#,!#"7'!5*'#$U"'1(&*'.3",*')(3U&'$/'23(.3"&&7' $*'0,//(*'!"'35&+"48'W=+"'!""3E&'3",4-')+"/'$*E&' ready,” he said. !"#$%"#&$'()"#%*+'"($*(,$+"$-&*#($")$./0"%1 '(2$ #&-&*3&34$ 5'3'+$ )*0&6""780"%9:;<=6#&>'(29$ *(,$:;<=6#&>'(280"%8 SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::SPORTS ! #$$!%&'! " ()'*')+,!

-./%0+!

1'.20'!

30//'++!

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7'20$.)!

3'.+658 ::BY KYLE LOBNER

A

!"#$% &% '()*% +,)"#$-% .&/"01% 2#&*0#% 3'&4% !""#$% #&'"% ()*(% first warm breeze of the spring for the first couple of weeks. Within a month, however, exhibition baseball has worn out its welcome. Very few, if any, tears were shed on Sunday afternoon as the Milwaukee Brewers loaded onto a bus and wrapped up their 40 days in the desert. The Brewers did experience a good deal of success in the Cactus League, however, finishing with a 19-10-2 record that included a 10-2-1 stretch from March 10 through Thursday. They were both the Cactus League’s and National League’s best team this spring, edging out the Cubs in both cases.

Many (perhaps most) spring training games, especially early in exhibition play, are largely decided by minor leaguers playing the late innings. Succeeding in that environment would seem to suggest that the Brewers received better contributions from their organizational depth than many of their peers. Until allowing 16 runs on Sunday, the Brewers also had the Cactus League’s best ERA (Earned Run Average) and spent much of the spring as the only Cactus League team to crack the top-10 in that statistic.

The last time the Brewers were among the five best spring training teams was 2011, when they went on to win 96 regular season games and the National League Central. Anecdotal SHEPHERD EXPRESS

evidence aside, what does this mean for the regular season? The answer, unfortunately, appears to be “not much.” Recent history suggests that success in the exhibition season has little to no correlation with winning once the games begin to count.

Consider the five teams that finished spring training with the best records in each of the last five seasons. Those 25 teams combined to go 2,086-1,964 in the regular season for an average record of 83-79. This group includes the 2014 Angels (98-64), the 2015 Royals (95-67) and the 2016 Nationals (95-67), but it also includes the 2016 Twins (59-103), 2015 Athletics (68-94) and 2016 Diamondbacks (69-93). Teams in this group made the postseason 40% of the time—about 10% more often than one would expect from a random sampling.

150+ ARTISTS, JUNKERS, & MAKERS

!"#$% &

The Five Worst Teams On the other end of the spectrum, consider spring training’s underachievers: The five worst teams from each of the last five exhibition seasons combined to go 1,9872,059 in the regular season, an average record of 80-82. Six of the 25 teams in this group won 90 games or more, including the 2016 Cubs (103-58). Teams in this group reached the postseason 28% of the time, roughly the equivalent of a random sampling.

The difference between the final results of the groups at the top and bottom of the exhibition standings is small at best, with the leaders averaging about three more wins. The difference in playoff odds could be significant but could also be chalked up to small sample size. Looking at numbers from the opposite direction produces an even murkier division between the good and bad teams.

Since the start of the 2013 season, nine teams have finished a regular season with 98 or more losses. Those teams went a combined 135-138 during exhibition play for a .494 winning percentage. Meanwhile, over that same time frame, 11 teams have won 97 or more regular season games. They combined to go 169-168 in the spring for a .501 winning percentage.

Certainly, the Milwaukee Brewers had a nice spring, as winning always beats the alternative. There is little evidence, however, to suggest that any of that will matter when the Brewers play the Cubs and Cardinals 10 times in their first 13 games. And, unfortunately, if the Brewers get off to a slow start, then any momentum from a hot spring will likely evaporate quickly.

#&'#!()!*+,&%$-.-/0

M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 13

::A&E

For more A&E, log onto shepherdexpress.com

ILLUSTRATION BY AURIELAKI

FEATURE | FILM | THEATRE | ART | BOOKS | CLASSICAL MUSIC | DANCE

Musicality and Societal Interrogation

Churchill’s prolific career spans nearly six decades, and she is recognized as a luminary in drama examining societal abuses and power dynamics through experimental theatrical forms. The British Council’s literature division describes Churchill’s dramaturgy as “the staging of desire, and more particularly the desires of those members of society who are least able to realize them … the desires of the oppressed, and most often, of women.”

The Council compares her style to that of Bertolt Brecht in its preference for episodic storytelling over traditional suspenseful plotting; her plays “tend to be constructed from many loosely connected scenes which do not necessarily ‘join up’ seamlessly with each other, but rather build up, through patterning, a general picture.” Churchill’s works also often include “juxtaposition of two radically discontinuous theatrical worlds.” In Top Girls, the fantastical opening dinner party contrasts markedly with the more realistic following sequences. Given this structure, audience members are placed within a dialectic and challenged to determine the connection between parts for themselves.

The script’s unusual storytelling mode is mirrored in its nomenclature, and Fete comments on the unique challenges this poses to her cast; they’re contending with a script full of slashes indicating overlapping dialogue and asterisks tracking which lines relate to others. “It’s not the kind of play you can practice on your own. It’s very musical. The cool thing about that is that, left to its own devises, the musicality will come out on its own,” Fete says. “At first we played with altering some of the punctuation, but once we got further in, it became pretty clear that it’s written perfectly, and you can’t alter a comma.”

Ongoing Relevance

The Human Cost of Success

!"#$%&&$#'"(&)*+,-).%/0&()"1-0,/"&)23") 4%0"55$)6$'"4)78)-/,6"&&%,#$0)9,5"#) ::BY SELENA MILEWSKI hat has one accomplished if success is achieved in a destructive manner and at great personal cost?” asks Renaissance Theaterworks Artistic Director Suzan Fete. Her question references the company’s upcoming production of Caryl Churchill’s Top Girls, which she directs and which marks the conclusion of the theater’s 25th season. Renaissance is Milwaukee’s only women-founded and women-run professional theater company, and Top Girls suits well its advocacy for gender parity.

Churchill’s Obie-winning drama places us in the world of Marlene, a British executive who has just bested her male peers for a promotion to a high-level management position.

She celebrates with a dinner party including five women from literature, history and myth, and these characters later transform into the women with whom Marlene interacts in her contemporary life. Using layered, atemporal storytelling, Churchill gets at the heart of the dilemma faced by professional women both in 1982 and today: how to maintain compassion and ethicality in a male-dominated world of business that continually holds them to standards not imposed on their male peers.

14 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

Describing her overall vision for the production, Fete says, “The idea of this play is that all of us are obsessed with success … Caryl Churchill said that she wants the absence of what is in her plays to have a presence, and I think what is absent in Top Girls is the ethic of compassion and caring.” Fete notes, too, that the various supporting characters must be fully realized so that the audience sees Marlene as part of a larger struggle: “If we see her situation as a piece of history, just like all these others, then it becomes bigger than just her story and bigger than just the oppression of women.”

In both its direction and design, the production highlights the stillpressing socio-political issues that Churchill presented in 1982. Scenic Renaissance designer Stephen Hudson-Mairet’s opening projection backdrop, for Theaterworks instance, features images of iconic Top Girls British women of the play’s time Broadway Theatre period with Margaret Thatcher front Center, Studio Theatre and center.

“It’s shocking how much the April 6-29 Reagan-Thatcher years echo today in the idea of the individual without responsibility for society,” Fete says.

“Many of the things that were talked about in England and here, too, with Ronald Reagan, were ‘We don’t need social programs.’” The play’s central question, Fete says, is “What do we owe the people that come here looking for a better life and children that have not committed any crime except to be born?”

Fete notes, “Child poverty increased 40% during the time that Margaret Thatcher was prime minister. I’m afraid that that’s the direction that we’re going in now: so many programs being cut, education being decimated, arts funding gone. And yet we’re the richest country in the world.” Like the state of the world, the challenges presented in Top Girls are clear, but the solutions remain to be determined.

Top Girls runs April 6-29 at the Broadway Theatre Center’s Studio Theatre, 158 N. Broadway. For tickets, call 414-291-7800 or visit r-t-w.com.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

B U Y T I C K E T S : PA B S T T H E AT E R . O R G ï

414.286.3663

g n i m r o f r e Th e P ! r e T t a M s t Ar By donating to the United Performing Arts Fund, you can provide children with an outlet for creativity and expression. You can help create jobs and boost the local economy. You can make our city a more creative place. To put it simply, your support of Milwaukee’s performing arts makes life better for everyone. !"#$%&'%"($)'$%'*+,-."/01("#$%& 234$#'5$/%&66!"7!896:$3;&&'<$66&% Photo by Rachel Malehorn and Timothy O’Donnell; 896:$3;&&'="3%>'2)?@>"#)'A/B>&4%/$ Photo by Ron Oshima; Christina Hall (Mrs. Lovett) and ,#(/&:'C$/&6$ (Sweeney Todd) in Skylight Music Theatre’s 2:&&#&)'D"(( !"#$"#%&'#($%#!!

!

M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 ! 15

::THISWEEKINMILWAUKEE MONDAY, APRIL 2

FRIDAY, MARCH 30

!

Brewers Opening Day @ Miller Park, 1:10 p.m.

!

What should Brewers fans expect from the team this season? That’s a tough one to answer. After telegraphing their intentions to compete by acquiring two elite outfielders, Lorenzo Cain and Christian Yelich, the team disappointed title-hungry fans by declining to pick up any of the big name starting pitchers on the market. So can they really hold their own against the Cubs and the Cardinals? We won’t have to wait too long to find out, since the team plays 10 or their first 13 games against those division rivals. No matter what happens, though, baseball is finally back, and for that fans can be grateful.

The Peder Hedman Orchestra @ Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, 8 p.m.

The Milwaukee music scene lost one of its giants this winter when singer, guitarist and songwriter Peder Hedman died unexpectedly. He’d been a champion of the city’s alternative scene for decades, playing in bands including Liquid Pink, Tweaker and The Winning People and continually exploring new sounds. At this event, some of the many musicians Hedman shared stages with over the years will honor his legacy by performing his music. The list of performers includes members of 3 on Fire, The Mighty Deerlick, The Carolinas, Radio Radio, Testa Rosa, F/I, The Peder Hedman Quartet, Voot Warnings, Bicentennial Rub, Liquid Pink, The Mercurys, Sugar Foot, The Riverwest Aces, The Aimless Blades, Trolley, Couch Flambeau, The Blinding Lights and The Detroit Jewel. The first 100 people admitted will receive a copy of a new 7-inch record from the Peder Hedman Quartet. The night will also feature a silent auction.

Of Montreal w/ Mega Bog @ Turner Hall Ballroom

If you’ve been keeping up with Of Montreal, congratulations: You have a remarkable attention span. Since the band’s 2007 zenith, Hissing Fauna, Are You The Destroyer?, Kevin Barnes’ shape-shifting ensemble have been one of the most prolific, ambitious and demanding bands in indie-rock, bounding from one makeover to the next. After losing their way for a while, they’ve been on something of a hot streak lately. 2015’s Aureate Gloom was Barnes’ most personal record since Hissing Fauna, detailing the dissolution of his marriage, while taking cues from the fairly straightforward rock ’n’ roll of New York’s ’70s glam and proto-punk scenes, and 2016’s Innocence Reaches added some cool new tricks to the band’s playbook, boldly cribbing from contemporary EDM on a few tracks. This winter, they released their latest, White Is Relic/Irrealis Mood, which draws from the spirit of ’80s dance singles.

Although the band tours a lot, they’re always worth seeing—they constantly reinvent their live show.

Slow Walker w/ Gallery Night and Moon Curse @ Cactus Club, 9 p.m.

ASHLEY DOELGER

“Gotta weed out the squares!” Slow Walker cheer with Ramones-esque brevity on the opening track of their new album, Ah Yes. Weeding out squares, to say the least, has never been a problem for the perennially underrated Milwaukee rock outfit, whose sludgy compote of stoner metal, pysch rock, punk and garage pop isn’t exactly honey for listeners with delicate tastes. If you’re on its wavelength, though, Ah Yes is an absolute blast, and perhaps the closest the band has come to making a party record. Like 2016’s Robert Plantain’s Grunge Lords, the sounds are heavy but the music is brisk and to the point. This is stoner rock for people with places to be and things to do. For this release show the band will be joined by a band with their own new product to plug: Milwaukee’s irascible Gallery Night will be releasing a trio of 7-inch records through Dusty Medical, Tall Pat and Big Neck records.

Calliope

SATURDAY, MARCH 31

Calliope w/ Space Raft and Shogun @ Company Brewing, 9 p.m.

Psych rock isn’t supposed to be cool. It’s supposed to be weird and disorienting, maybe even unnerving. And first and foremost, it’s supposed to be loud. On those fronts, Milwaukee rockers Calliope always deliver, and their new album, Chapel Perilous, is their most massive yet, an eruption of scorchedearth guitars, blustery vintage organs and quaking rhythms that plays like a stack of old Deep Purple 78s that got badly warped by the sun but sound all the better for it. There are thousands of psych rock bands on the circuit, but none that sound quite like this one.

A$AP Ferg w/ Denzel Curry and IDK @ The Rave, 8 p.m.

Like A$AP Rocky, the other marquee member of New York’s fashionable A$AP Mob collective, A$AP Ferg has always had impeccable taste in production, which he demonstrated on his striking debut record, Trap Lord. But more than anybody else in his crew, Ferg hasn’t been afraid to get personal. On his 2016 sophomore album, Always Strive and Prosper, he stepped out of character to write vividly and emotionally about his family and his upbringing. “I felt like it was something I had to do in order to move forward,” he explained to the Shepherd in an interview last fall. “I gave them the character of Trap Lord. I gave them the persona, the shell. It was my ego, Trap Lord. But I wanted to give them the human being, somebody who was baring themselves to the public and who was vulnerable, so people could relate to me.” That soul baring hasn’t come at the expense of bangers, though. His latest mixtape Still Striving is thick with them.

16 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

TUESDAY, APRIL 3

!

Judas Priest w/ Saxon and Black Star Riders @ The Riverside Theater, 7 p.m.

British heavy-metal titans helped reinvent the genre with their massive 1980 album, British Steel, a stripped-down, straight-ahead assault on the eardrums. The dual guitar attack of Glenn Tipton and former member K.K. Downing drove the album, while Rob Halford’s amazing vocals (the guy has a four-octave vocal range) pushed the material well over the top. What is perhaps most remarkable is that British Steel came out just one year after Hell Bent for Leather, and two years after the equally strong Stained Class. Time hasn’t dulled the band any. This month the group released their 18th album, Firepower, which reunited them with producer Tom Allom for the first time since 1988’s Ram It Down. The band has bragged that the title track may be the fastest song they’ve ever performed.

Creed Bratton @ Turner Hall Ballroom, 8 p.m.

Before NBC’s adaptation of “The Office,” Creed Bratton was best known as a former singer and guitarist for the California bluegrass band The Grass Roots, but TV viewers are far more familiar with the considerably shadier version of himself he played on the sitcom. For nine years, viewers watched the drug-addled character lie, cheat and seriously weird out co-workers whose names he could rarely remember. For this show, the real Creed Bratton will perform a night of music and comedy. !

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 4 Margaret Glaspy w/ Buck Meek @ The Back Room at Colectivo, 8 p.m.

Margaret Glaspy sets herself apart from other indie singer-songwriters with her genre-defying approach to creating music. On her debut 2016 album, Emotions and Math, Glaspy’s vulnerable lyrics were complemented by her strong vocals, with each component threaded together over a patchwork of folk, blues, rock and pop influences. Publications that took notice of Glaspy included the New York Times, NPR Music and Billboard, which all included Emotions And Math on their “Best of 2016” year-end lists.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Don't miss this contemporary folk tale, inspired by conversations with the citizens of Milwaukee.

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ANTARCTICA, WI Written by Finegan Kruckemeyer, with input from the citizens of Milwaukee This play was co-commissioned by First Stage in Milwaukee, WI and Filament Theatre in Chicago, IL

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M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 ! 17

MICHAEL BROSILOW

A&E::THEATRE

The Rep's 'Patsy Cline'

THEATRE|REVIEW

‘Patsy Cline’ Shines on at Stackner Cabaret

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18 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

THEATRE|PREVIEWS

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A lurid title such as Sexual Perversity in Chicago is certainly attention grabbing enough, but, apparently, rather too shocking for Hollywood. This David Mamet sex-and-romance comedy was given the far tamer name About Last Night when it was adapted (twice: 1986 and 2014) for feature film. And, despite the title, it’s not so much about sexual perversity, per se, as it is about fairly typical, modern-day heterosexual birds and bees—love, lust and fantasies—as well as an exploration of the oftentimes seemingly unbridgeable gaps that exist between the sexes when it comes to affairs of the heart.

The play is set in Chicago in the 1970s and, as The New York Times described upon its 1974 debut, “takes funny and painful digs at the fantasies and distances of the contemporary sexual game.” The play centers on a romantic couple and their respective friends. Dan Shapiro and Deborah Soloman, both in their 20s, are intermittently in and out of love with each other; both are relative novices at all this. There’s also Bernardo Litko, Dan’s friend and associate, who is something of a macho braggart (especially regarding bedroom “conquests”); and Joan Webber, Deborah’s friend and roommate, whose experiences with the opposite sex have left her both cynical and distrustful.

Theatergoers beware: The language and, of course, subject matter, are very adult. (John Jahn) March 30-April 14 at The Alchemist Theatre, 2569 S. Kinnickinnic Ave. For tickets, visit thealchemisttheatre.com.

5/-4/.'%/6 0&"47%-)% William Shakespeare’s tragic romance Antony and Cleopatra debuted in 1607 at the Globe Theatre. It may seem remarkable that something so old could have much relevance for today; let alone the fact that its setting is cast yet further back in time—to ancient Rome. But its themes of betrayal, power-seeking, lust and love are all too human and will be forever relevant to us; such emotions and drives are what make us…us. The fact that it contains one of the relatively few stand-out Shakespearian female characters makes it all the more interesting as a theater piece.

Boozy Bard Productions’ Shakespeare Raw series took on Julius Caesar last season—a work for which Antony and Cleopatra is something of a sequel. Hence, Boozy Bard’s actors will be donning the togas and sandals—and downing the alcohol—again for this production. (For the uninitiated, their technique is to give the actors little warning as to which character they will play and have them periodically imbibe throughout the show.)

Speaking once more of Antony and Cleopatra’s relevance to today, the Act Two line, “I will praise any man that will praise me,” should have a familiar ring; simply apply the “me” therein to a certain White House occupier.

(John Jahn) April 2-4 (all at 7:30 p.m.) at Best Place at the Historic Pabst Brewery, 901 W. Juneau Ave. Tickets are $10 at the door—$5 if you’re in a toga.

A&E::DANCE DANCE|PREVIEW

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::BY JOHN SCHNEIDER

oung Milwaukee dance artist Zach Schorsch, so good in recent Danceworks shows, struggled after graduating UW-Milwaukee’s dance program in 2016. “My emotional and physical health was fluctuating drastically,” he said, “and I wasn’t sure if I was ever going to participate in dance again. But making art is a way for me to curate otherwise incomprehensible experiences, so creating Wisdom Teeth was my only option.” He constructed an autobiographical solo, creating movement “that helped me find my body,” and incorporating journal entries he’d written in childhood.

He tested his solo in Danceworks DanceLAB’s Get It Out There and Cooperative Performance’s One Act Festival.

Then, “It was time for the piece to grow. We all have wisdom teeth. We’ve all evolved based on our growing pains.” He asked established dance artists Joëlle Worm, Posy Knight and Emily Bennett, and UWM dance students Chelsey Becher, Kelsey Lee, Annie Peterson and Megan Vélez, to undertake a similar process. The result is a full-length choreographic work, his first, incorporating eight “open and raw” personal stories about the journey to adulthood. Performances are Saturday, March 31 at 7 p.m. and 9 p.m. at Danceworks Studio Theater, 1661 N. Water St. $17 general admission, $12 artists. Call or visit danceworksmke.org.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

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M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 ! 19

JAMES ROGERS

A&E::VISUALART

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VISUALART|REVIEW

A ‘To-Do List’ at the New Var West Gallery ::BY KAT KNEEVERS

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s the owner/director of the Third Ward’s Portrait Society Gallery, Debra Brehmer spends a lot of time looking at and thinking about portraiture, in particular the question of the purpose of painted portraits in the age of iPhones. “Before photography, one needed a portrait to anchor one’s legacy or to send a neighboring country your daughter’s image when shopping for a spouse and land treaty,” she writes. Brehmer’s suspicion is that the medium is uniquely suited to capture its subject’s “essential you” in a way that even the most forgiving filter cannot.

Two solo exhibitions representing contemporary approaches to the “essential you” of portraiture are on display at Portrait Society Gallery opening Friday, March 30. Dominic Chambers’ work incorporates personal biography and African American history to reflect on the black body. “Dominic Chambers: In Light our Bodies Shift,” continues the young artist’s investigation of love and the spiritual beings that accompany us. Chambers received a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree from MIAD in 2016 and is currently completing a Master of Fine Arts degree at the Yale University School of Art. Skully Gustafson’s paintings have a roughhewn irreverence set off by popping colors and idiosyncratic representations of the human form. Gustafson’s canvasses are busy affairs, rich in detail and demanding considerable interpretive work on the viewer’s part.

“Skully Gustafson: Outdoor Wigstore” is the artist’s second major exhibition at Portrait Society Gallery. (above) Dominic Chambers (bottom) Skully Gustafson

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Fiddleheads Coffee Roasters | 10530 N. Port Washington Road Thomas Lemke was born and raised near the small central Wisconsin town of Gresham, surrounded by vast expanses of farmland and untamed Wisconsin wild. “Before the term was used for raising healthy chickens,” he quips, “I was free-ranging.” This upbringing, the envy of all would-be Huck Finns, perhaps accounts for Lemke’s sensitivity to the majesty of the natural world. Despite his day job as a company photographer for Northwestern Mutual, making his living with portraiture, public relations and advertising, Lemke has never ceased to photograph nature.

Two bodies of work are on display at Mequon’s Fiddleheads Coffee Roasters through May 31. In “The Fiddleheads,” Lemke photographs the furled fern fronds known charmingly as fiddleheads. Using the photographic technique of “focus-stacking” to bring the fiddleheads into sharp focus, Lemke “transforms these diminutive forest dwellers into impressive presences.” In “The Wolf River,” Lemke continues his lifelong documentation of central Wisconsin’s Wolf River, playing with different lengths of exposure that transform the river’s appearance and reflect the passage of time that characterizes Lemke’s own relationship to the river.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

A&E::FILM

[FILM CLIPS] Flower R High school girl Erica (Zoey Deutsch) is a blackmailer who sexually entraps men (they’re all jerks anyway). She acts up, is reckless and self-absorbed, yet we see that she has some sort of heart in this oddball comedy. Erica decides to do good by helping her nerdy, recovering addict new stepbrother by shaking down the teacher who, he says, molested him. The queasy set-up holds interest as we wonder where Erica will take it—even after her scheme goes out of control.

Flower’s best moments are mordantly hilarious scenes of social awkwardness. Of local interest: The film’s director, Daniel Winkler, is the son of Henry “The Fonz” Winkler. (David Luhrssen)

Ready Player One PG-13

‘The Death of Stalin’

Satirizing Tyranny in ‘The Death of Stalin’

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Director Steven Spielberg undertakes this adaptation of Ernest Cline’s 2011 novel. In 2045, the overpopulated Earth is in decline. To escape a dreary reality, gamers immerse themselves in “OASIS”—a virtual reality allowing players to be whoever they like. Deceased creator James Halliday (Mark Rylance) has willed his fortune, along with control of OASIS, to the first gamer to find the Easter Egg within the game. Eighteen-year-old Wade Watts (Tye Sheridan) dedicates his life to the task, joining forces with Samantha (Olivia Cooke), Aech (Lena Waithe) and several others, hoping to beat the evil billionaire (Ben Mendelsohn) who plans to monetize OASIS to further his own wealth and power. Unfolding in both the real and virtual worlds, Ready Player One introduces both the actual players and their avatars. Meanwhile, those possessing an extensive knowledge of ’80s pop culture will find themselves overcoming many obstacles creator Halliday has placed along the way. (Lisa Miller)

Tyler Perry’s Acrimony R Having written and directed 15 movies in the last decade-plus, Tyler Perry has even spawned seven different TV series. Although critics consistently pan his work, Perry’s got fans aplenty, including Oprah Winfrey. His themes are frequently marriage-centric, but here, Perry gives it a twist. He explores the consequences of Melinda’s (Taraji P. Henson) unbridled anger after her deadbeat ex-hubby (Lyriq Bent) becomes a financial success and gets engaged to a younger, beautiful woman (Crystle Stewart). Perry says the story has been fermenting in his mind for years. Further, he claims this is his best film ever. Shhhh!! Don’t let pistol-packing granny, Madea, hear you say that! (L.M.)

R

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June 18ñ 22, 2018

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M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 21

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ART & MUSIC 91 .7 FM W MSE PRESENTS

J OI N U S APRIL 6 , 2 01 8 | 6 P M - 1 0 P M Pritzlaff Building | 333 N. Plankinton T ICKETS AT WMSE.O RG

Live painting: Sue Berce, Jason Van Roo, Cristian Andersson, Nova Czarnecki, Melissa Courtney, Ken Vonderberg, Chuck Weber, Todd Mrozinski, David Mueller, Jimmy von Milwaukee, Curt Crain

Bid on over 200 boards of art including: The Dry Points, Jeff Redmon, Tom Noll, Amy O’Neil, Chuck Dwyer, Clare Jorgensen, Timo, Dave Watkins, Simon Teigeiro, and Skully Gustafson

Live Music: The Erotic Adventures of Static Chicken

Sponsored by Enlightened Brewing Company and Great Northern Distilling

Food provided by

22 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

Owned and operated by:

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A&E::BOOKS

BOOK|PREVIEW

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::BY JENNI HERRICK

WM professor Brenda Cárdenas served as Milwaukee’s Poet Laureate in 2010-2012 and has used her creative writing to focus on Latino/a literatures and cultures and to spotlight issues of migration. In addition to her work as a faculty member in the Creative Writing Program at UWMilwaukee, Cárdenas serves as an editor for Resist Much/Obey Little: Inaugural Poems to the Resistance (Spuyten Duyvil Press, 2017) and Between the Heart and the Land: Latina Poets in the Midwest (2001).

She will join current students in UWM’s English Department for a live reading at Boswell Book Company. A trio of graduate students (writers Mollie Boutell, Su Cho and Eric Wegenke) will read from their original works in the latest installment of UWM’s United We Read, a student/faculty reading series that is held four to five times a year at various bookstores, bars and cafés across Milwaukee.

Cárdenas, a Milwaukee native who is currently an associate professor of English at UWM, is the author of Boomerang: Poems by Brenda Cárdenas (2009) and was selected by the Library of Congress to read from her original work as part of their Spotlight on U.S. Hispanic Writers in 2014. Her poetic grace and linguistic ability to blend Spanish and English language allows her to communicate strong emotions and difficult ideas that transcend traditional borders. She will join her up-and-coming student writers for a free public event beginning at 7 p.m. on Thursday, March 29 at Boswell Book Co.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::HEARMEOUT ASK RUTHIE | UPCOMING EVENTS | PAUL MASTERSON

::RUTHIE’S SOCIALCALENDAR

Let the Skeletons Out? !"#$%&'()*"+

I don’t know how to handle this: I was arrested for driving under the influence a few months ago. Next month, I’m visiting my parents and siblings in Denver. Do I tell them or keep it to myself? Part of me feels like it’s my own business because I’m a 34-year-old woman and don’t owe it to #(2,(%!",!&)#1%!&0/)!.(6,13#".,(8!C(!")%!,")%1!)#(+5!:A3! so upset with myself that I feel if I tell them, I’ll feel better about the situation.

+,-.&/)0#1#"$

!"#$%!',,-+

In this day of Uber and Lyft and taxi cabs (yes, they still exist), one should never drive under the influence; and trust me, honey, I know a thing or two about being under the influence. That said, you are an adult and do not have to share &0/)!&/1%>04&!>.")!,")%1&8!

If you’re torn, play it safe and enjoy the time with your family. The past isn’t going to change itself, so meander the situation a bit longer. You can always tell your parents via a 4),(%!/#**!,(/%!2,0A1%!&01%!,6!2,01!+%/.&.,(!",!+,!&,8

!"#$%&'()*"+

I’m proud to say that I’ve been clean and sober for 11 years. I’ve finally met a guy that I’m in love with, but I’m afraid to tell him about my insane past that cost me everything but my life...and nearly that, too. We recently had a long talk about the need for honesty, but I’m scared to let him in on my battle with addiction. Do I keep it to myself or tell him about my past?

2#$0)3)456 74)-$&-$.&2"8)3&

!"#$%./0"$+

Congratulations on your successful sobriety all these years. Good for you! You started off by saying you’re proud of yourself, and you should be. Share that pride with your 3#(8!=441,#/)!."!61,3!")%!&"#(/%!")#"!2,0!#71%%!>.")!")%! (%%+!6,1!),(%&"25!&,!")%1%!#1%!4#1"&!,6!2,01!4#&"!2,0A+!*.$%!",! share. Tell him now before he finds out from other sources, leaving him to question your honesty. Be proud of your sobriety and invite this new man to celebrate your clean-living ways. If he doesn’t appreciate your success at beating addiction, then kick him to the curb.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

March 28: Transgender Day of Visibility Panel Discussion at ManpowerGroup Solutions (100 Manpower Place): Join the Human Rights Campaign and the Elevate LGBTQ business resource group at Manpower for a 3 p.m. discussion on transgender rights in the workplace. Ideal for managers, those working human resources and those interested in workplace equality, the free and open-to-the-public event concludes with a networking opportunity at 4:30 p.m.

March 30: Dear Ruthie’s Dining with the Divas at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): Shawna Love, Malaiya Marvel and I hit the stage at the pink-and-purple palace for two fantastic shows.

Fast and funny, my 7:30 and 9:30 p.m. drag shows get your weekend off to a fun start. Come for one show or stay for both but call 414-488-2555 for reservations first.

March 31: Mr. & Miss Courage Pageant at LVL Dance (801 S. Second St.): It’s time to crown 2018’s king and queen of Courage MKE, and the new hot spot in Cream City is just the place to do it! Come check out the renovation of La Cage, meet celebrity judges and enjoy the glamor of one of the city’s favorite LGBTQ pageants. Visit couragemke.org for more on the 6 p.m. evening.

March 31: My Little Pony Party at D.I.X. (739 S. First St.): Magic, friendship and kooky fun combine for this nutty nod to the infamous ’80s Hasbro collectibles. Vajayjay Snappenturtle is your colorful host for the night, guiding you through drag shows, drink specials, dancing and more.

Harness your inner pony or saddle up your best gear and join the 10 p.m. party.

March 31: RuFFHOUSE 8 at This Is It (418 E. Wells St.): At 11 p.m., the lights go down, the chairs and tables come out and beats turn up at this Cathedral Square staple. Enjoy a DJ, drink specials and dancing till bar close...all without a cover.

April 1: Easter Bonnet Bingo at Fluid Bar (819 S. Second St.): Grab your PEEPS, and end Easter on a funny note with bingo and a bonnet contest.

Dress to impress or simply come for the laughs during the free 4 p.m. celebration. Prizes, drink specials and more make it an Easter Sunday like no other.

Want to appear on Ruthie’s social calendar? Need her advice? Email DearRuthie@Shepex.com and follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook Ruthie Keester.

::MYLGBTQ!"#$%&"'&(#)*

!"#$%&'# ()*+,#()-.# /"+#01,#23(

!

::BY PAUL MASTERSON

!"# $%&'("))"# *+,-"&.,)/# 0&,1"# 0&23! "#$%&! place on Saturday, April 14. It’s the first such %'%("! )%*+! ,(! #! -#"),*./! 0(.'%1&."2! /#340&5! ever. As an alumnus, I find it a remarkable mo3%("! ,6! 41,71%&&8! 9)%(! :! &"0+.%+! #"! ,*+! ;<5! it would have been unthinkable to imagine an LGBTQ+ Re&,01/%! -%("%1! ,1! =*03(.! -,0(/.*5! 30/)! *%&&! #! >%*/,3.(7!

LGBTQ Pride Prom. It’s supported by dozens upon dozens of diverse MU organizations from the Arab and Muslim Women’s Research and Resource Institute to the Marquette Panhellenic Association, and community organizations like Cream City Foundation and the LGBT Community Center as >%**! #&! 71,04&! 61,3! ;.*>#0$%%! ?/),,*! ,6! @(7.(%%1.(7! #(+!

UW-Milwaukee.

Not surprisingly, the Pride Prom also has its detractors.

One, TFP Student Action (TFP SA), has even conducted an online petition against it. When I stumbled on the TFP SA webpage last fall, the petition had already amassed 18,000 signatories. At the time I thought that was a lot of irate Marquette students, staff and alumni who didn’t like gay people. =&!."!"01(&!,0"5!>).*%!&,3%!41,"%&"%1&!3#2!)#'%!#!/,((%/".,(! to MU (including a former MU professor), the organization behind the petition does not. As it turns out, the TFP SA is affiliated with the American Society for the Defense of Tradition, Family, and Property (hence the TFP). Founded in Brazil in 1960, its mission is a cultural counter-revolution against progressive ideologies that undermine Christian culture (or, at least, their version of it).

Aside from the rabid denunciation of all things LGBTQ, the fact that the dance is being held in the Marquette student union has particularly piqued TFP’s ire. It seems there is a chapel in the union and in the chapel is the Blessed Sacrament #(+!")%1%6,1%!7#2!6,*$&!61,*./$.(7!.(!")%!"%34*%!41%/.(/"&5!&,! to speak, is especially abhorrent. Still, given the union’s daily comings and goings by sinners of any ilk, the place should have spontaneously combusted ages ago.

Anyway, beyond being anti-LGBTQ, the TFP opposes much too much to list here. However, a few tidbits deserve dishonorable mention, like “President Carter’s human rights policy,” the “retroactive lifting of the statue of limitations for civil cases involving sexual abuse,” the ecological movement, reproductive rights, the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and pacifism. To be fair, TFP isn’t just against stuff, of course, it’s #*&,! !"#$ *,"&! ,6! ").(7&! >%! #&&,/.#"%! >.")! -)1.&"A&! "%#/).(7&! like Rosaries, guns and rule by the “elite.” Actually, it sounds 1#")%1!*.$%!")%!-#"),*./!/0*"!.(!%&'!()*+,-+$."/' (which, by the way, the TFP deems heretical). Suffice it to say, it’s essentially the current Republican regime’s agenda for God, the Second Amendment and unbridled capitalism.

Interestingly, TFP preaches a very traditional concept of the “elite.” For that, its members have an ax to grind when it comes to egalitarianism (in general) and the Age of the Enlightenment (in particular). Needless to say, they would have rooted for the Romanovs.

Curiously, among the TPF’s many essays is an ominous line: “If elites decay, it is hard for them not to drag the peo4*%!+,>(!>.")!")%38B!?4%#$.(7!,6!>)./)5!+.+!2,0!>#"/)!")%!

Stormy Daniels interview?

M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 23

::MUSIC

For more MUSIC, log onto shepherdexpress.com

CHAD BATKA

FEATURE | ALBUM REVIEWS | CONCERT REVIEWS | LOCAL MUSIC

Steve Earle

!"#$#%#&'(#%

'#$)!)"!%*)!%'+,-%+./!% 0,+..#'*#&1%'+&12% 34%5#&'!%(&"#' ::BY JOSHUA MILLER hese days, singer-songwriter Steve Earle doesn’t have to fret about getting a part-time job to make ends meet. But in the late ’80s, there were at least a few moments of uncertainty. In 1986, he released his debut album, Guitar Town, which became a number one, chart-topping country record. The album’s singles, however, didn’t have much traction in the charts, and his follow-up, Exit 0, released the following year, didn’t have any songs that charted higher than number 30 on the country singles chart.

24 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

“It was sort of obvious that country music had decided that I didn’t belong, and I had to find another place to go,” says Earle. “So, I started finding ways to get on rock radio. I needed to get played somewhere else in order to keep having a career. I wanted to do enough that I didn’t have to get a job.” After playing and recording in Nashville, Tenn., for more than a decade (he moved there in 1974) he was suddenly moving west to try his luck in Memphis. It was there that he recorded his third album, Copperhead Road, at the legendary Ardent Studios.

“It’s an important record to me because I felt like I had to fight to make that record the way that I wanted to make it,” Earle says.

“It was fun to go and be in a different environment than the one I was used to in Nashville.” It proved to be a wise decision. Rock radio took notice following the album’s release in 1988 on Uni Records, an imprint of MCA Records. The album’s singles received heavy airplay and turned new listeners onto Earle’s music. In a way, Earle’s fight for Steve survival in making the album is one reason he’s still at it today. “I saw it as an escape from the Earle demise of my career rather than continue to Pabst make country records for radio,” he says.

Theater This year, Earle and his longtime band The Friday, Dukes will be celebration the album’s 30th March 30, anniversary. The album will be performed in 8 p.m. its entirety along with songs from the rest of his career, including his latest album, So You Wanna Be An Outlaw. It’s not the first time he’s tried album shows. Two years ago, he celebrated Guitar Town with album-centric shows. “Doing the Guitar Town 30th-anniversary thing was more fun than I thought it would be,” Earle says. “This has been surprising, because some of the songs I haven’t played in a long time. There’s about three songs I’ve played every night, and the rest I haven’t played since 1988. It’s fun to play those songs again.”

The album is a mix of political and love songs. Political songs like “Snakeoil” were written about the Vietnam War but still resonate today “considering our current political situation,” he says. “In the ’80s, people were making art about the whole Vietnam experience,” he says. “I grew up during the Vietnam War. It was my post-Vietnam record.” Earle is flattered that people still enjoy that album, and that it’s influenced generations of musicians. “That’s a degree of success when people take your work and build on that and go on and do their work,” he says.

While he admits he’s a better songwriter now, he’s still proud of the album’s songs.

“I wrote Copperhead Road when I was 33 years old, and I had been in Nashville since I was 19 and learning from really good teachers,” he says. “So, I was a pretty good songwriter then.” The album features The Dukes on many of the tracks, as well as special guests like The Pogues and Telluride (also known as Strength in Numbers). Since Ardent is made of three separate studios, they happened to be recording at the same time R.E.M. was recording their album, Green. R.E.M. even borrowed steel guitar player Bucky Baxter for a couple of songs. Earle says his biggest regret is not having Béla Fleck play banjo on “Nothing but a Child.” Ultimately, though, recording at Ardent is something he’ll always cherish; it’s a moment from his career when he made a defiant turn away from country radio, so he finds it amusing that country radio later came around to it.

“When the line dance craze [in the ’90s] was going on, there was a Copperhead Road line dance,” he recalls. “And I think that’s when country stations embraced it and played it as a recurrent.”

Steve Earle and The Dukes play The Pabst Theater on Friday, March 30 at 8 p.m. with openers The Mastersons.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::LOCALMUSIC COURTESY OF DAVE RUDNIK

MUSIC::CONCERTREVIEW

Mitski Shines Bright at Sold-Out Colectivo Show

::BY LAUREN KEENE

I

ADAM MISZEWSKI

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M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 25

MUSIC::LISTINGS THURSDAY, MARCH 29

Amelia’s, Jackson Dordel Jazz Quintet (4pm) Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Acoustic Guitar Night Cactus Club, Jason Mohr w/Mark Waldoch & Tony Barba Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Song Circle w/Tricia Alexander Camp Bar Tosa, Jude and The Dude Colectivo Coffee (On Prospect), The Low Anthem w/Haley Heynderickx Company Brewing, Olivia Jean w/Fox Face & Faux Fiction County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Acoustic Irish Folk w/Barry Dodd Jazz Estate, Chris Speed Trio w/Dave King and Chris Tordini Mason Street Grill, Mark Thierfelder Jazz Trio (5:30pm) O’Donoghues Irish Pub (Elm Grove), The All-Star SUPERband (6pm) Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Mirage III Rounding Third Bar and Grill, World’s Funniest Free Comedy Show Shank Hall, Halo Circus w/Pelham The Bay Restaurant, Trevor Mihalski The Packing House Restaurant, Barbara Stephan & Peter Mac (6pm) Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Martini Jazz Lounge Turner Hall Ballroom, Wolf Alice w/The Big Pink Up & Under Pub, A No Vacancy Comedy Open Mic

FRIDAY, MARCH 30

Alley Cat Lounge (Five O’Clock Steakhouse), Brian Dale Group Ally’s Bistro (Menomonee Falls), Scotch and Soda American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), Brian Wurch American Legion of Okauchee #399, Cowboy Up Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Julie’s Piano Karaoke Cactus Club, Double Record Release show party! Slow Walker, Gallery Night & Moon Curse Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Six Wives Of Richard w/Fallen Angels (8pm); DJ: Paul Host (10pm) Clarke Hotel (Waukesha), Dick Eliot Jazz Guitar (6pm) Colectivo Coffee (On Prospect), The Last Revel w/Chicago Farmer ComedySportz Milwaukee, ComedySportz Milwaukee!

County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Traditional Irish Ceilidh Session Crawdaddy’s, Cadillac Pete & Terry James Duo (6pm) Frank’s Power Plant, Rendered With Hate w/Anomaly, Order of Unukalhai & Beetlegork Hops & Leisure (Oconomowoc), The Josh Becker Band Jazz Estate, Kevin Hayden Band (8pm), Late Night Session: Mark Thiefelder and Janet O’Mahony Duo (11:30pm) Kochanski’s Concertina Beer Hall, Jaded by Choice Lakefront Brewery, Brewhaus Polka Kings (5:30pm) Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, The Peder Hedman Orchestra Mamie’s, Marvelous Mack Mason Street Grill, Phil Seed Trio (6pm) McAuliffe’s Pub (Racine), Sunspot MugZ’s Pub and Grill (Muskego), Country Legends Tribute w/ Tim Castle (6pm) Pabst Theater, Steve Earle & The Dukes w/The Mastersons Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Ryan McIntyre (9pm), In the Fire Pit: The Carpetbaggers (9pm)

Rave / Eagles Club, Banda El Recodo / Banda Los Recoditos w/ Banda Tierra Sagrada & Banda Agaveña (all-ages, 9pm) Route 20 Outhouse (Sturtevant), Otherwise w/Wayland, Vital Empire & Black Belt Theatre Shank Hall, Sprecher Presents: Greg Koch-Koch Marshall Trio w/ David Grissom Studio 200, John B Tally’s Tap & Eatery (Waukesha), Tomm Lehnigk The Bay Restaurant, J. Ryan Trio The Iron Horse Hotel, Robert Allen Jr. Band (6:30pm) The Packing House Restaurant, Carmen Nickerson & The Carmen Sutra Trio (6:30pm) Up & Under Pub, Good Grief

SATURDAY, MARCH 31

American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), Nostalgia Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Piano Night Anodyne Coffee (Walker’s Point), Porky’s Groove Machine w/ Funk Summit Bass Team Cactus Club, Yamtanka Sonic w/Titan, Vanishing Kids & Pleasure Thief Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Claudia Schmidt Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: The R&B Coquettes (8pm); DJ: Paul Finger (10pm) Club Timbuktu, Seven Days of Samsara w/Majority Rule, Paige Marshall, Plague Walker & Snag Colectivo Coffee (On Prospect), Dylan LeBlanc w/The Artisanals ComedySportz Milwaukee, ComedySportz Milwaukee!

Company Brewing, Calliope Record Release Party w/Space Raft & Shogun Delafield Brewhaus, The Jonny T-Bird Trio Five O’Clock Steakhouse, Kirk Tatnall Frank’s Power Plant, Outdoor Velour w/Brave You & Dodgeball Club Hilton Milwaukee City Center, Vocals & Keys Hops & Leisure (Oconomowoc), Ol’ Style Skratch House of Guinness (Waukesha), Derek Byrne & Paddygrass w/ Tanya Tachon Jazz Estate, Latin Night with Cache (8pm), Late Night Session: Marcya Danellie Quartet (11:30pm) Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Paper Holland w/Nelson Devereaux And His Style Band, Yum Yum Cult & Cody Steinmann Mason Street Grill, Jonathan Wade Trio (6pm) Mo’s Irish Pub (Downtown), Jude and The Dudes Motor Bar & Restaurant, American Blues w/Dave Potter, EG McDaniel & Jimi Schutte (5:30pm) MugZ’s Pub and Grill (Muskego), Open Jam w/host Willow Creek Nice Ash Cigar Bar (Waukesha), Robert Allen Jr. Band O’Donoghues Irish Pub (Elm Grove), Generation Gap w/CP & Tom Anderson (6pm) Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: KatieBeth Acoustic (9pm), In the Fire Pit: The Brian Dale Group (9pm) Rave / Eagles Club, A$AP Ferg w/Denzel Curry & IDK (all-ages, 8pm) Red Dot Wauwatosa, 5 Card Studs Riverwest Filling Station, Eccentric Acoustic Rockfield Live (Germantown), The Carpetbaggers w/Leroy Deuster Shank Hall, Lil’ Ed and the Blues Imperials The Cheel (Thiensville), Steve Cohen, Eric Noden & Marc Wilson The Coffee House, Patty & Craig w/Kyle Linehan The Packing House Restaurant, Joe Jordan & His Soul Trio (6:30pm) Trinity Three Irish Pubs, Dan Harvey w/DJ Marcus Turner Hall Ballroom, Circa Survive w/Foxing & Hail The Sun

Up & Under Pub, King Solomon Yardarm Bar and Grill (Racine), The Blues Disciples (6:30pm)

SUNDAY, APRIL 1

Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Live Karaoke w/Julie Brandenburg Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Punk Guilt w/S.B.D. (8pm); DJ: Trail Boss Tim Cook (10pm) Colectivo Coffee (On Prospect), Juice County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Dick Eliot Jazz Guitar (5:30pm) Dugout 54, Dugout 54 Sunday Open Jam Hops & Leisure (Oconomowoc), Full Band Open Jam Rounding Third Bar and Grill, The Dangerously Strong Comedy Open Mic Shank Hall, Jasmine Cain w/The Almas The Tonic Tavern, Third Coast Blues: Andrew Koenig Band w/ Benny Rickun (4pm)

MONDAY, APRIL 2

Club Garibaldi, The 4onthefloor w/Vandoliers & Pay The Devil Jazz Estate, Jazz Estate Jam Session Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Poet’s Monday w/host Timothy Kloss & featured reader Paul Zasadny (sign-up 7:30pm, 8-11pm) Mason Street Grill, Joel Burt Duo (5:30pm) Paulie’s Pub and Eatery, Open Jam w/Christopher John The Roadhouse (Dundee), Craig Omick & Friends Open Jam w/ Jeff Arnold, Ricky Orta Jr. & Ronn Gilbert Turner Hall Ballroom, of Montreal w/Mega Bog Up & Under Pub, Open Mic w/Marshall McGhee and the Wanderers

TUESDAY, APRIL 3

C Notes Upscale Sports Lounge, Another Night-Another Mic Open Mic w/host The Original Darryl Hill Frank’s Power Plant, Duck and Cover Comedy Open Mic Kim’s Lakeside (Pewaukee), Robert Allen Jr. Band Open Jam Mamie’s, Open Blues Jam w/Carole & Craig Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) McAuliffe’s Pub (Racine), Parkside Reunion Big Band Shank Hall, Layne w/Selfish Things & Clear Pioneer The Jazz Gallery Center for the Arts, Jazz Jam Session Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Transfer House Band w/Dennis Fermenich Turner Hall Ballroom, Creed Bratton

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 4

Bremen Cafe, Funk Summit Bass Team w/Rocket Paloma & Shelly Schauer Cactus Club, The Whiffs w/Future Plans Colectivo Coffee (On Prospect), Margaret Glaspy Conway’s Smokin’ Bar & Grill, Open Jam w/Big Wisconsin Johnson High Dive, The Voodoohoney Pirates Jazz Estate, Jeannine Rivers Duo Kochanski’s Concertina Beer Hall, Polka Open Jam Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Acoustic Open Stage w/feature Wolves With Virginia (sign-up 8:30pm, start 9pm) Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) Paulie’s Field Trip, Humpday Jam w/Dave Wacker & Mitch Cooper Tally’s Tap & Eatery (Waukesha), Tomm Lehnigk The Cheel (Thiensville), Keith Pulvermacher (6pm) The Packing House Restaurant, Carmen Nickerson & Kostia Efimov (6pm) Totalgame Sports Bar, Wacky Wednesdays w/host The Original Darryl Hill

!"#$%&'()*$#"+,!"#$%&#'"()*+,-./01/2/34#/3#+5011#67+/3-++-+ 3/29 Eagle Trace 4/5 MJ≠ UNCOVERED Preview with B~Free 26 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

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CLASSIFIEDS

TO PLACE YOUR AD CALL 414-292-3816

DWELL

JOBS

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT

Drivers Wanted Passenger Transportation: MKE County. Early Shift, starting at 6am. Full-time. $13.01/hr. Full benefit package incl. $500 retention bonus after 6 mos. Must possess clean driving record, pass criminal background and drug screening.

Call 414-264-7433 X 222.

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Band rehearsal studios by the month.

414.536.7337

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from Summit Credit Union ,01234%5607%809:436;:%<4% &6;95,2<74:= ,02234>79?34+;36;@A62

Ask the Dentist

Capuchin Apartments: 2502 W. Tamarack St. is opening its Waiting List for individuals in need of affordable Studio apartments. Income limitations apply in order to qualify for residency.

All requests for preapplications must be completed in person only and will be accepted at: Capuchin Apartments 2502 W. Tamarack St. Milwaukee, WI 53206 10:00 AM – 1:00 PM March 26 and 29, 2018 Maskani Place: 320 E. Center St. is opening its Waiting List for families in need of affordable 2, 3 and 4 bedroom apartments.

Income limitations apply in order to qualify for residency. All requests for pre-applications must be completed in person only and will be accepted at: Maskani Place 320 E. Center Street Milwaukee, WI 53212 12:00 PM – 8:00 PM April 5 and 12, 2018 Prairie Apartments: 1218 W. Highland Ave. is opening its Waiting List for individuals in need of affordable Studio apartments. Income limitations apply in order to qualify for residency.

All requests for preapplications must be completed in person only and will be accepted at: Prairie Apartments 1218 West Highland Ave. Milwaukee, WI 53233 10:00 AM – 1:00 PM March 28 and 30, 2018.

Exceptional, Furnished Studios OPEN HOUSE EVERY SAT & SUN 11am - 12pm.

Five Stars. Located in trendy Walkers Point.

Extra Clean. Shared bath and kitchen. Smoke Free.

On Bus Line. Weekly rent starts at $99 plus sec. dep. Utilities incl.

703 S 5th St. 414-384-2428 OR 414-722-8418.

SERVICES SHEEHAN CONSTRUCTION Brick, Block, Stone, Stucco, Tuck pointing, Chimneys, Retaining Walls. Concrete Work.

New and repair. Free Estimates. Accepts credit cards. Call John: 414-258-9838.

HEALTH SPECIAL TOUCH MASSAGE Massage $55 & up.

Lose 2-3 dress/pants sizes instantly with THE body wraps starting @ $75.

Facials also available.

Call Sheldon for appt. now 414-551-4100.

(Mobile spa/hotel service available)

PUBLIC SALE Notice of Public Sale South Milwaukee Self Storage - 1005 Columbia Ave, South Milwaukee, WI 53172. April 9th at 1pm.

Bidding is on complete contents of unit less the Motorcycle. Owner Daniel Zweck Contents: Hand and Power Tools, Contractor Supplies, Gas Heaters, Landscaping Equipment, Snow Blower, Compressor, Ford Truck (parts only), Red Ford Pick up.

ANYMORE?

Disclaimer: The Shepherd Express makes no representations or warranties of any kind, whether express or implied, regarding any advertising. Due diligence is recommended before entering into any agreement with an advertiser. The Shepherd Express will not be held liable for any damages of any kind relating to any ad. Please check your ad the first day of publication and notify us of any changes.

We are not responsible for errors in advertising after the first day.

We reserve the right to edit, reject or reclassify advertisements in our sole discretion, without notice. We do not knowingly accept advertisements that discriminate or intend to discriminate on any illegal basis, or are otherwise illegal. NO REFUNDS for cancellation after deadline, no copy changes except to price or telephone number.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Teweles Seed Tower Location, Location, Location 1, 2 & 3BR, many w/2BA Market & Affordable Rates Available Industrial Chic Design!

888-TEWELES (888-839-3537)

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WHO SAYS

PEOPLE

DON’T READ ADS

Submit your questions at drmurphy@ stephaniemurphydds.com

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YOU’VE ALREADY READ MOST OF THIS AD.

SHEPHERD

EXPRESS

CLASSIFIEDS

414.292.3816

Tapuat brewing co.

sister bay, Door county, wi.

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DUH...

By James Barrick

!"#$%&'"()&*(+ “Movie Sudoku”

Solve this as you would a regular sudoku, except using the nine given letters instead of numbers. When you’re done, each row, column, and 3x3 box will contain each of the nine given letters exactly one time. In addition, one row or column will reveal, either backward or forward, the name of a famous movie. psychosudoku@gmail.com

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© 2018 United Feature Syndicate, Dist. by Andrews McMeel Syndication

ACROSS 1. Maximum 5. Ice crystals 9. Glib talk 15.Island territory of the Netherlands 19.Baseless 20.The Great or The Terrible 21.Scrape 22.Muscat and — 23.Pyrite: 2 wds.

25.Katherine Anne Porter novel: 3 wds.

27.No-duty region: 2 wds.

28.In unison: 2 wds.

29.Engaged: 2 wds.

30.Fluctuate 31.Capture 32.Part of FHA 34.Tractor-trailers 37.Profit 38.Revamp 39.Landlocked place in Asia 40.Acts unwisely: 3 wds.

44.Depression-era org.

47.Diminutive suffix 48.Wash 49.Of a cereal 50.“The Love —” 51.Spitchcock 52.Special language 53.Weeds of grain fields 54.Tantalize 55.Place of business 57.Pooch 58.Stun, in a way 59.Gold rush area 60.Bewitched 61.Troubadour’s love song 62.Ameliorate 64.Cube or cone 65.Droning way of speaking 68.Bitter — 69.Blemish 28 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

70.Bowl 71.Mauna — 72.Walk with effort 73.Get a point 74.Pavilions 75.Floating ice mass 76.— ammoniac 77.Fiscally imprudent: Hyph.

79.Gaelic 80.Like kale 81.Spotted rodent 82.Stratum 83.Circlet for the head 86.A cosmetic 88.Crystal-gazer 90.Circa 91.Eat 92.Cure-alls 96.Fruitless effort: 2 wds.

99.Rash 100. If not 101. Mental attitude 102. Hotel chain 103. Agent: Hyph.

104. Venue 105. Judo teacher 106. Skin 107. Idem DOWN 1. Offend 2. Reputation 3. Blackthorn fruit 4. Show a show 5. Exactitude 6. Off-white color 7. — liquor 8. Tip 9. Shown walking, in heraldry 10.Scorn 11.Threefold 12.CD predecessor 13.Tokyo, formerly 14.Ump’s cousin

15.More willingly 16.— propre 17.Light wood 18.Adams the photographer 24.Springs 26.Name meaning “faithful” 28.Aromatic herb 31.Authority: Hyph.

32.Ice masses 33.English school 34.Shuteye 35.Trencherman 36.Entertainer at court: 2 wds.

37.Bands 38.In the style of 40.Cooler 41.Of flax 42.Tricked, in a way 43.— seal 44.Nonsense 45.Smoke an e-cig 46.Abbr. on an envelope 50.Brute 52.Preferences 53.Snake venom 54.Mortise and — 56.Made softer 57.Credence 58.Breakfast item 60.Pile up

61.Budgetary concern 62.Enervates 63.— podrida 64.Lacking expression 65.Nine days’ wonder 66.Scandinavian 67.Hungry 69.Racing shell 70.Eructation 73.Bird found in marshes 74.Cook, in a way 75.Binturongs 77.Kicks 78.Controversial church prelature: 2 wds.

80.Dry streambed 82.Wife of Jacob 83.Estaminets 84.Coins of ancient Greece 85.Perch 86.Coffee and cocoa 87.Old weapon 88.Lyon’s river 89.Sumerian god 91.She was “The Nanny” 92.Fruit type 93.Writer Bombeck 94.West or Sandler 95.Dec. 31st word 97.Curve shape 98.Itinerary: Abbr.

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WORD FIND This is a theme puzzle with the subject stated below. Find the listed words in the grid. (They may run in any direction but always in a straight line. Some letters are used more than once.) Ring each word as you find it and when you have completed the puzzle, there will be 26 letters left over. They spell out the alternative theme of the puzzle.

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::FREEWILLASTROLOGY ::BY ROB BREZSNY ARIES (March 21-April 19): A number of years ago, a New Zealander named Bruce Simpson announced plans to build a cruise missile at his home using parts he bought legally from eBay and other online stores. In accordance with current astrological omens, I suggest you initiate a comparable project. For example, you could arrange a do-it-yourself space flight by tying a thousand helium balloons to your lawn chair. APRIL FOOLS! I lied. Please don’t try lunatic schemes like the helium balloon space flight. Here’s the truth: Now is a favorable time to initiate big, bold projects, but not foolish, big, bold projects. The point is to be both visionary and practical.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The Finnish word kalsarikännit means getting drunk at home alone in your underwear and bingeing on guilty pleasures. It’s a perfect time for you to do just that. The Fates are whispering, “Chill out. Vegetate. Be ambitionless.” APRIL FOOLS! I told a half-truth. In fact, now is a perfect time to excuse yourself from trying too hard and doing too much. You can accomplish wonders and marvels by staying home and bingeing on guilty pleasures in your underwear. But there’s no need to get drunk.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Actor Gary Busey is very sure there are no mirrors in heaven.

He has other specific ideas about the place, as well. This became a problem when he was filming the movie Quigley, in which his character Archie visits heaven. Busey was so enraged at the director’s mistaken rendering of paradise that he got into a fistfight with another actor. I hope you will show an equally feisty fussiness in the coming weeks, Gemini. APRIL FOOLS! I lied, sort of. On the one hand, I do hope you’ll be forceful as you insist on expressing your high standards. Don’t back down! But on the other hand, refrain from pummeling anyone who asks you to compromise.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In the Scots language still spoken in parts of Scotland, eedle-doddles are people who can’t summon initiative when it’s crunch time. They are so consumed in trivial or irrelevant concerns that they lose all instinct for being in the right place at the right time. I regret to inform you that you are now at risk of being an eedle-doddle. APRIL FOOLS! I lied. In fact, the truth is just the opposite. I have rarely seen you so well primed to respond vigorously and bravely to Big Magic Moments. For the foreseeable future, you are King or Queen of Carpe Diem.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Paul McCartney likes to periodically act like a regular person who’s not a famous musician. He goes grocery shopping without bodyguards. He rides on public transportation and strikes up conversations with random strangers. I think you may need to engage in similar behavior yourself, Leo. You’ve become a bit too enamored with your own beauty and magnificence. You really do need to come down to earth and hang out more with us little people. APRIL FOOLS! I lied. The truth is, now is prime time to hone your power and glory; to indulge your urge to shine and dazzle; to be as conspicuously marvelous as you dare to be.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The coming days will be an excellent time to concoct an alchemical potion that will heal your oldest wounds. For best results, mix and sip a gallon of potion using the following magic ingredients: absinthe, chocolate syrup, cough medicine, dandelion tea, cobra venom and worm’s blood. APRIL FOOLS! I mixed a lie in with a truth. It is a fact that now is a fine time to seek remedies for your ancient wounds. But the potion I recommended is bogus. Go on a quest for the real cure.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I expect you will soon receive a wealth of exotic and expensive gifts. For example, a benefactor may finance your vacation to a gorgeous sacred site or give you the deed to an enchanted waterfall. I won’t be surprised if you’re blessed with a solid gold bathtub or a year’s supply of luxury cupcakes. It’s even possible that a sugar daddy or sugar momma will fork over $500,000 to rent an auditorium for a party in your honor. APRIL FOOLS! I distorted the truth. I do suspect you’ll get more goodies than usual in the coming weeks, but they’re likely to come in the form

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

of love and appreciation, not flashy material goods.

(For best results, don’t just wait around for the goodies to stream in; ask for them!)

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): There’s a narrow waterway between Asia and Europe.

In the fifth century B.C., Persian King Xerxes had two bridges built across it so he could invade Greece with his army. But a great storm swept through and smashed his handiwork. Xerxes was royally peeved. He ordered his men to whip the uncooperative sea and brand it with hot irons, all the while shouting curses at it, like “You are a turbid and briny river.” I recommend that you do something similar, Scorpio. Has Nature done anything to inconvenience you? Show it who’s the Supreme Boss! APRIL FOOLS! I lied. The truth is, now is an excellent time for you to become more attuned and in love with a Higher Power, however you define that. What’s greater than you and bigger than your life and wilder than you can imagine? Refine your practice of the art of surrender.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Fifteenthcentury Italian painter Filippo Lippi was such a lustful womanizer that he sometimes found it tough to focus on making art. At one point, his wealthy and politically powerful patron Cosimo de’ Medici, frustrated by his extracurricular activities, imprisoned him in his studio to ensure he wouldn’t get diverted. Judging from your current astrological omens, Sagittarius, I suspect you need similar constraints. APRIL FOOLS! I fibbed a little. I am indeed worried you’ll get so caught up in the pursuit of pleasure that you’ll neglect your duties. But I won’t go so far as to suggest you should be locked up for your own good.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Now is a favorable time to slap a lawsuit on your mom in an effort to make her pay for the mistakes she made while raising you. You could also post an exposé on social media in which you reveal her shortcomings, or organize a protest rally outside her house with your friends holding signs demanding she apologize for how she messed you up. APRIL FOOLS! Everything I just said was ridiculous and false. The truth is, now is a perfect moment to meditate on the gifts and blessings your mother gave you. If she is still alive, express your gratitude to her. If she has passed on, do a ritual to honor and celebrate her.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Aquarian author Alice Walker won a Pulitzer Prize for her novel The Color Purple. She has also published 33 other books and built a large audience.

But some of her ideas are not exactly mainstream. For example, she says that one of her favorite authors is David Icke, who asserts that intelligent extraterrestrial reptiles have disguised themselves as humans and taken control of our planet’s governments. I bring this to your attention, because I think it’s time that you, too, reveal the full extent of how crazy you really are.

APRIL FOOLS! I half-lied. While it’s true that now is a favorable time to show more of your unconventional and eccentric sides, I don’t advise you to go full-on whacko.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Warning!

Danger! You are at risk of contracting a virulent case of cherophobia! And what exactly is cherophobia? It’s a fear of happiness. It’s an inclination to dodge and shun joyful experiences because of the suspicion that they will disappoint you or cause bad luck. Please do something to stop this insidious development. APRIL FOOLS! I lied. The truth is that you are currently more receptive to positive emotions and delightful events than you’ve been in a long time. There’s less than a one-percent chance you will fall victim to cherophobia.

Homework: What quality or behavior in you would most benefit from healthy self-mocking? Write freewillastrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

::NEWS OF THE WEIRD ::BY THE EDITORS OF ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

I’m Not Dead Yet!

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F(-&41($;(4,<$:(30$7+.9$,21$*(%*$0(1#$6()4+G-$ .2+31$%&&(%)$12$2:(31+3,$94-$*(%19$/%4)(*$H19($ court maintained that he was too late; the rul' ing is final). “I am officially dead, although I’m alive,” Reliu told Romanian media out' )(1-=

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ford was startled by what felt like an extrahard cashew as she enjoyed some Planters ,+1-$4,$(%3)0$8%3.9=$>-$-9($*32:(#$-9($9%,*(*$ the object to her mom, who turned on the in' terior light in the car and realized it was a hu' man tooth, with dried blood on it. “I got very upset, I was crying, I threw up two or three times,” Botsford told WOIO-TV. She went to a hospital, where doctors confirmed it was a 9+7%,$ 12219$ %,*$ 13(%1(*$ 9(3$ /23$ (E&2-+3($ 12$ blood or bodily fluids. Botsford called Plant' (3-#$ %,*$ &%3(,1$ .27&%,0$ P3%/1$ Q(4,R$ -(,1$ %$ .2+34(3$ 12$ &4.A$ +&$ 19($ 12219$ /23$ 1(-14,<=$ ?9($ .27&%,0$-%4*$41$4-$4,:(-14<%14,<$41-$7%,+/%.'

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A member of the Listowel Paranormal Society in Windsor, Ontario, Canada, was surprised when police arrived at his door on 8%3.9$B"#$4,S+434,<$%;2+1$%$-7%))$;)%.A$;2E$ with a red wire protruding from it that had ;((,$)(/1$%1$8%.A(,R4($Q%))$4,$M4,*-23=$?9($ Windsor Police Explosives Disposal Unit was .%))(*$ 12$ 19($ 9%))$ 12$ 4,:(-14<%1($ 19($ ;2E#$ ;+1$ determined it was “safe” and not explosive.

T2.4(10$7(7;(3-$9%*$+-(*$19($;2E$193(($*%0-$ earlier at the historic building to sweep for -&4341-=$ U(,$ K%3A(3#$ %--4-1%,1$ *43(.123$ /23$ 19($ -2.4(10#$.%))(*$19($;2E$%,$V8W$H()(.1327%<' netic field) sensor and said each team member carries one when they’re looking for ghosts.

Fast and Furious T4;)4,<-$ >,124,($ F23-(0#$ D"#$ %,*$ >,124' ,(11($ F23-(0#$ DX#$ 2/$ T1=$ I2+4-$ .22A(*$ +&$ %$ .)(:(3$ -.9(7($ 12$ -1(%)$ %$ .%3=$ ?9($ T1=$ I2+4-$ K2-1'F4-&%1.9$3(&231(*$19%1$2,$8%3.9$BY#$19($ two went to Joe-K Used Cars and asked to test drive a 2012 Dodge Charger. The sales' 7%,$*32:($19(7$2//$19($)21#$%,*$19($F23-(0-$ %-A(*$947$12$*34:($12$19(43$%&%317(,1$;+4)*4,<$ so they could retrieve their IDs. In the parking )21$ 2/$ 19($ %&%317(,1$ ;+4)*4,<#$>,124,(11($ <21$ out of the car, an unidentified person drove up next to the Charger in a Volvo, got into the Z9%3<(3#$&+))(*$2+1$%$<+,$%,*$*(7%,*(*$19($ stunned salesman get out, which he did. The %37(*$Z9%3<(3$;%,*41$19(,$<21$;%.A$2+1$947' self, went back to his Volvo and drove off.

Meanwhile, Antoine jumped back into the Charger and sped away with his sister, leaving the salesman watching in disbelief. Antoine, however, soon crashed and flipped the Char' ger. Both siblings have been charged with first-degree robbery. © 2018 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDI' CATION

6%:(,,%#$ N942#$ 3(-4*(,1$ O4.A2)(11($ 521-' M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8 | 29

THEBACK::ARTFORART’SSAKE

An April Fool’s Say ::BY ART KUMBALEK

I

’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a? So listen, whilst fiddling with the radio knob in hopes of finding a station that plays 24-hour continuous Easter music and simultaneously waiting for that Chinese space lab satellite the-size-of-a-goddamn-schoolbus to come crash to Earth with the top of my noggin as bulls-eye, I recalled a million-dollar conversation I had a while back with my pal Little Jimmy Iodine about an idea that would make Our Town numero uno for filching the tourist buck, what the fock.

So there we were, enjoying a couple, three nice cigarettes under clouded stars since you couldn’t smoke indoors anymore like normal people used to. And we decided a great thing for Beerville would be if we could work out a deal where we trade all our focking squirrels to some kind of place like the country formerly known as Burma in exchange for all their monkeys, you betcha.

Think about it. I’m bored with these squirrels everywhere and you may be, too. I think this town and sister environs would be much more intriguing plus festive if we had the monkey running to and fro rather than the focking squirrel. Be it bonobo, rhesus or macaque—I don’t give a flying fock. They’d be a lot more entertaining to have in the trees than these rats with tails who horde their nuts like they’re going out of style, for christ sakes. Not to mention that if you were fortunate

30 | M A R C H 2 9 , 2 0 1 8

enough to ensnare one of these rampant simians, you may be able to train it to perform simple household chores to afford you extra leisure time with which to dream of your own focking million-dollar scheme.

Why not this trade? In Milwaukee, we’ve got monkeys in a zoo and squirrels all over the rest of creation while somewhere like your Bangkok they probably got just the opposite. And so I suggest a nice cultural exchange—squirrels for monkeys—could only improve world relations. I also think parts of our heated green globe would just die to have squirrels running free instead of only in a zoo; except they wouldn’t die ’cause they’d be able to serve those squirrels up on their dinner table as fast as they got them, and the rest of the world wouldn’t have to worry about an increasing global hunger problem, what the fock. And if we were to outfit the monkeys with various traditional ethnic costumery, surely kids and families would flock to Monkey Town and let their vacation dough rain down upon us locals.

Anyways, Little Jimmy and I decided to suspend rumination and leave the practicalities of such a trade to the scientists and planners ’cause we both needed to take a leak, which we thought best done indoors like regular people instead of outdoors like a couple of focking monkeys.

Anyways, I’ve got to go. There’s still a couple of days left for me to figure what I should give up for Lent since Easter comes Sunday—April Fools’ Day this year, which is what those Roman soldiers who were guarding the tomb of Jesus must’ve felt like when they discovered that the lord pulled a Harry Houdini on them and had escaped. Yes sir, some top flight sentry work there, ain’a?

And for some of you’s there’s the Passover, so here’s a little story you may like to share: Man goes to see the Rabbi. “Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it.” The

Rabbi asks, “What is wrong?” The man replies, “My wife is poisoning me.” The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, “How can that be?” The man then pleads: “I’m telling you, I’m certain she’s poisoning me, what should I do?” The Rabbi then offers: “Tell you what.

Let me talk to her, I’ll see what I can find out and I’ll let you know.”

A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, “Well, I spoke to your wife. I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?” The man anxiously says, “Yes.” And the Rabbi says, “Take the poi-

son.” Ba-ding!

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