Issuu

THRIVE • EMPOWER • SHINE

WINTER 2016

FLOURISH ‘TIS THE SEASON’

YOUR HOLIDAY GUIDE FOR 2016 PAGE 45

HAPPY CAMPERS

COZY STYLES FOR OUTDOOR FUN PAGE 16

‘YOU’RE ALWAYS STRONGER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE’. PAGE 28 Flourish-111016.indd 1

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Time To give Thanks… Dr. JAYNE PATTY

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Jayne F. Scherrman, D.D.S. 2

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If you remember… When gas was 55 cents a gallon, it’s time for a colonoscopy.

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contents

FLOURISH

HAPPY CAMPERS

For subscription information, call 800-879-1210 or 573-335-6611 or online at www.semissourian.com/flourish/ subscribe For advertising and editorial information, call 800-879-1210 or 573-335-6611 Publisher Jon Rust Advertising director Donna Denson Editor Robyn Gautschy

features

living

26 ‘Being healthy makes

30 A flexible space

you feel fabulous’

28 ‘You’re always stronger than you think you are’

32 Soup-er meals 34 Paws & Effect

business/finance

age appropriate

Money resolutions

36 #imadethis

Rethink your desktop

38 ‘It’s OK to be quiet’ 40 Parents: Are you guilty of

health/fitness

arguing in front of your kids?

41 The Five of Clubbs

10 Feeling stressed? 12 Step away from the snack machine

style & beauty 15 The Beauty Counter 24 The power of a good fit

‘tis the season 46 Holiday equations 48 A festive feature

Design Nadir Hussein Account executives Ashley Aufdenberg, Emily Colbert, Jody Seabaugh, Laura Hulcy, Samantha Mlot, Glenda Mayberry, Jennifer Berti, Debbie Stoverink and Paul Walker Cover photography Laura Simon Cover model Shalyn Tucker Photography Laura Simon and Ben Matthews Flourish magazine is printed four times a year. All contents © 2016 by the Southeast Missourian. All rights reserved. Reproduction or use in whole or in part of the contents, without prior written permission of the publisher, is strictly prohibited.

52 At peace with the season 54 Trim that tree 55 The holiday hustle 57 Fixes for kitchen disasters 60 Holiday happenings

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from the editor

“

I stress about stress before there is even stress to stress about because I’m stressed about the stress that I will inevitably have soon.

”

saw a meme on Facebook today and I shared it on my page because it was funny, but also because it was so true in my life. It said, “I stress about stress before there is even stress to stress about because I’m stressed about the stress that I will inevitably have soon.” Anyone who knows me knows I worry about everything. I worry about work. About making others happy. About bills. That my cats will get lonely when I’m gone for the weekend. That my outfit isn’t quite right. About whether I’ll find the right guy for me. About that weird sound my car is making. It’s just the way I’m wired — always has been. Conversations with other people prove I’m not the only one in a perpetual state of stress. And with the holidays approaching, what I hear more than anything is not joy and excitement — it’s dread about a jam-packed season of cooking, shopping, traveling and entertaining. Without even planning it, many of the stories in this issue touch on the issue of stress — how it affects the mind and body, how to get through heartbreaking times as a parent, how to save time on holiday prep, what to do if something goes wrong in the kitchen before your big holiday dinner. Why do we do this to ourselves? We all, myself included, need to remember that mindfulness, self-care and “me time” are needed for our mental, emotional and physical health. (The experts say so! Read more about this on page 10.) Sometimes we need to take care of ourselves before we can take care of others, even if it means saying “no” to someone. (Easier said than done, I know!) As Jackson writer Sarah Geringer says of her new book, “Christmas Peace for Busy Moms,” featured on page 52, “I thought it was time to focus on the peace we can find in the season, not just for ourselves, but for other people. Focus on peace, not perfection.” It’s fitting, then, that this month’s fashion photo shoot is all about rest and relaxation while “glamping” — aka “glamorous camping.” I think a weekend of cozy blankets, hot dogs and s’mores on the campfire, and a peaceful night’s rest are just the ticket to enjoying — not just surviving — the upcoming months. And hey, if your idea of a relaxing getaway looks more like a five-star hotel or just eating pizza in bed, that’s cool, too. Whatever it takes. Here’s to a truly enjoyable holiday season spent with the people you love most.

~ Robyn Gautschy, editor

connect with us Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/flourishwomen

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Online at www.semissourian.com/flourish

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business & finance / money resolutions

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Stock photo

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MONEY RESOLUTIONS

Did you spend too much and save too little this year? Damage your credit? Here’s how to get back on track in 2017. By Suzanne Thompson Cozza

When it comes to money, it seems there’s never enough, and with the holidays looming ahead, it’s easy to accumulate more debt than you had intended. LaKenya Taylor, author of the book “Improving Your Money Flow,” says having a plan is important. “Have a holiday financial plan and stick to it,” she says. “Keep yourself in the black and not in the red. ... I know you want to be kind and get a gift, plus cook for everyone, but this year, do something a little different.” Taylor is known as the “Money Clues Lady” on

the The Heartland’s CW, where she dispenses financial advice five days a week at 6:30 a.m. She emphasizes the importance of self-discipline. “With a holiday financial plan, you are setting boundaries that should not be crossed, not even by you,” she says. “Once it is set, there is no turning back.” The only acceptable changes to spending are ones that reduce the amount of spending, she says. “If you need to update the plan, that’s OK, but only do it if decreasing the amount is the plan; otherwise, get creative when it comes to gift-giving,” she says. “Perhaps make some gifts. You can always check out Pinterest.” Tracking your spending is a must.

“It’s important to know where your money is going,” says Tracy M. Bonner, branch operations manager at The Bank of Missouri. “Every dollar spent and every dollar saved adds up. Develop a spending plan as well as a savings plan. The two go hand in hand.” When the holidays loom, it’s easy to whip out a credit card and say, “Charge it.” Balances can pile up fast, but it takes time to pay down the balances. “Don’t let this be daunting,” says Ashton Balsmann, assistant vice president and mortgage loan officer at Wood & Huston Bank. “Whether it’s the credit cards that may seem like they’ll never go Continued on page 43

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business & finance / productivity

Stock photo

RETHINK YOUR DESKTOP

10 office organization tips to boost productivity 8

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tunity for unique storage. One stylish and affordable option is to cut a peg board and place it in an open frame. This eye-catching wall hanging allows for easy access to office essentials.

By BrandPoint

Empty boxes, piles of paper, pens strewed about — everyone is guilty of office disorganization. What most people don’t realize is a messy, disheveled office space can dramatically reduce worker efficiency and productivity. A staggering 98 percent of office workers say they’d be more productive at their jobs if their offices were more organized, according to a 2015 Post-it study surveying 1,000 fulltime office workers. That means it’s time to get organized, and these 10 simple ideas will help you tidy up your work area and stay on task for good.

7 Stock photo

items. If you don’t use it weekly, find another place for it. That means unused folders, staREDUCE AND RECYCLE Go through drawers and get rid of pa- plers, tape dispensers and the like can go in perwork and supplies you never use. a drawer. Recycle paperwork and give unused supplies AN OFFICE SUPPLY STAPLE to co-workers or donate them to your comDespite the rise of the digital office, munity’s schools. If you’re never going to use sticky notes are still an office staple. these things, they’re just taking up valuable On average, office workers use 30 of them per space. week. Keep notepads nearby so you can easily use them to mark paperwork or write your KEEP SUPPLIES STOCKED Ninety-four percent of office workers co-worker a note of encouragement.

WRITE IT DOWN Sixty-two percent of office workers prefer to manage their to-do list on a piece of paper rather than a computer or digital device. Write your task list and place it somewhere you’ll see it, such as the edge of your computer monitor or the front of your notebook. This visual reminder will keep you on task throughout the day.

DON’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF At a loss for how to organize paper clips, tacks and other small office items? Small tins are a great way to sort and store these office odds and ends. Place them in drawers so they are out of sight.

SYSTEMIZE FOLDERS Tackle that pile of folders in the corner and create a simple organizational system. Color code the folders based on your work responsibilities so each tab color is tied to a specific task or status of a project.

are less productive when they don’t CORRAL PENS have all the supplies they need to work. OrPens and other office extras like scisder necessary supplies like sticky notes, file sors, letter openers and highlighters folders, tabs, daily planners, notebooks and CUT CORD CHAOS look tidy when placed in a jar on your desk. A pens. Then, put colored flags on the calendar Are you always digging under big jar can hold everything, or use smaller jars to mark when you need to reorder supplies so your desk for the right cord? to sort each item into its own container. Clear you’re never without the necessities. Black binder clips typically used to hold paglass jars make it easy to see what’s inside. perwork together are also great for organizRETHINK YOUR DESKTOP ing USB, cellphone chargers and other cables. THINK VERTICALLY A clean desktop is essential to producClip to the side of your desk and thread the If you’re short on desktop space, think tivity, but many people are guilty of chord through the metal to eliminate tangles. vertically. Walls provide ample opporhaving their desk covered with unnecessary

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health & fitness / stress

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FEELING STRESSED?

Practice mindfulness and self-care to put your mind, and body, at ease By Lindsay Jones

For most people, stress is a part of everyday life: Someone cuts you off in traffic. You’re late for work. Your basement is flooded. Your spouse isn’t doing their fair share of the chores again. Someone “unfriends” you on Facebook. Your boss is on the warpath. The cable technician doesn’t arrive on time. The washing machine suddenly breaks. Your car has a flat tire. The baby sitter doesn’t show up. The utility bill is twice as high as it should be. Stressors like these can stretch on seemingly forever. But when stress begins to accumulate over time, it can cause much bigger problems than momentary frustration. Dr. Julie Sappington, who teaches mental health nursing at Southeast Missouri State University, says one of the most obvious byproducts of chronic stress is how it affects mood. People who are exposed to nearly constant stress can become irritable or short-tempered, which not only can affect their relationships, but can put them at risk for physical illnesses such as heart disease and stroke. The reason for this, she says, is how the mind and body react in stressful situations. When stress occurs, hormones and neurotransmitters are released in a “fight or flight” reaction that’s only meant to be a short-term mechanism. With chronic stress, however, those chemicals stick around and can damage blood vessels and suppress the immune system, among other things. “So people are more likely to get sick,” she says. They’re also more likely to gain wait around the abdomen, have trouble sleeping or suffer from anxiety, depression or foggy thinking. Alyssa Nagel, a licensed professional counselor at Great Oak Counseling in Cape Girardeau, says one of the most common forms of stress she sees among clients are rooted in relationships, whether at home, work,

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school or even in cyberspace. “I see a lot of personal interaction kinds of stressors,” she says. Whatever the reasons, stress should be managed as it arises and not allowed to become a chronic draw on energy or contentment. To help clients find ways to mitigate stress, Nagel says she tries to help them realize why certain things trigger them to overreact. Many times, the way people react to situations is connected to traumatic experiences early in life. Sometimes, all it takes is being exposed to a certain smell to trigger a reaction. “These things get stored differently in the brain,” she says. “What trauma does is make associations that don’t make sense.” In many cases, people will attempt to “zone out” or self-medicate by watching TV or engaging with social media. But that’s not particularly helpful. “You may feel like you’re coping with it in the moment, but you’re really just avoiding it,” Nagel says. One way to help confront and lessen stress is by practicing mindfulness, whether it’s in the form of yoga or taking a brief walk in nature. Exercise is another way to keep stress from accumulating, even on a cellular level. “Even just little things we can do for ourselves can permeate our lives,” Nagel says. Just as stress accumulates, so, too, can small snippets of “me” time as people work to remove themselves from situations that cause the most stress. Even preparing dinner can become a mindfulness activity if a person concentrates on the feel of chopping vegetables and enjoys the smell of the food while it’s cooking. “I cannot talk about self-care enough,” Nagel says. But when all else fails, seeking professional help is another way to discover why stress is taking such a toll — and to do something about it.

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health & fitness / food 5 ways to say goodbye to your ‘sad desk lunch’

STEP AWAY FROM THE SNACK MACHINE

By BrandPoint

WALK AWAY FROM YOUR DESK. Do you eat at your desk every day? You have a lunch break for a reason, so use it. You’re busy and need a few minutes to recharge throughout the day. You’ll come back refreshed and ready to be productive for the rest of the afternoon. Eating at your desk also means you’re probably multi-tasking, not paying attention to your food. Leaving your desk will help you become a more mindful eater and you’ll enjoy your meal more. Take a walk, socialize with co-workers or do something that gets you up and moving for at least 15 minutes.

You’re running out the door, already late and thinking about that important 8 a.m. meeting. Lunch is the last thing on your mind. In fact, you usually just pick something up from the deli line or local fast food place and hurry back to your desk. Sound familiar? You’re not alone. Only one in five people actually ditch their desks during their lunch hour. When you feel your stomach growl, it’s all too easy to grab something from the vending machine or — if you remember — to pack a cold turkey sandwich. But there are BAKE UP A BATCH plenty of easy ways to spice up your lunchtime OF HEALTHY CHIPS. routine at work. Here are some tips to improve Step away from the snack machine. You don’t your mediocre midday meal: need those stale potato chips. You can bake your

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own with only six ingredients. Thickly slice 2 pounds of potatoes and coat them with olive oil and 1 tablespoon of salt. Season with cayenne and ground pepper. Arrange the slices on a greased baking sheet and bake at 400 degrees for 30 minutes until potatoes are crisp and golden brown. Then, spread them out on parchment paper, sprinkle with salt and enjoy. Pack a handful of chips in your lunch each day for more crunch and less guilt. STRAY FROM THE PB&J. Peanut butter and jelly might be a staple, but it’s time for a grown-up work lunch. You can find sandwich fixings that are not only easy and quick, but take your lunch to the next level. Chicken salad is a healthier option, and you can’t beat that classic, creamy texture and flavor.

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Professional Fitting With A Certified Fit Specialist Stock photo

FIND A NEW WAY TO PACK YOUR SALAD. Forget about soggy, wilted lettuce. One of the best ways to pack a salad is in a quart-sized canning jar. Put your dressing on the bottom, then add your lettuce, veggies and any other salad toppings. Everything stays separate until it’s time to toss together. Simply pour the salad out into a bowl and you’re ready to eat. Your salad will also last for a couple of days in the fridge, so you can make a few days’ worth of lunches ahead of time. MAKE YOUR LUNCH AT WORK. Are you always running out of time to pack a lunch? Choose a lunch you can throw together in minutes. A chicken salad wrap, tuna melt, pita pocket sandwich with hummus or a Greek yogurt parfait are all relatively simple, healthy meals you can prepare in the office. Keep the ingredients on hand and lunch will be a no-brainer.

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Band Sizes 28 - 54 Cup Sizes A - N

519 Broadway Downtown Cape Girardeau 573-290-0041 www.perfectfitbraboutique.com Tues-Fri 10-6 & Sat 9-4

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FIRST PLACE

in Best Magazine/Alternative Publication in the Missouri Press Foundation's 2016 Better Newspaper Contest.

Inspiring Women. Since 2010, Flourish Women's Magazine has been producing content to encourage women and cultivate community. We are honored to be awarded best magazine and appreciate the support of our loyal readers and advertisers. You make us want to achieve more with every issue!

MAGAZINE

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The Beauty Counter

Q & A / style & beauty

How to rock a red lipstick By Anne Hudson

It is my firm belief that wearing red lipstick can be as effective as changing from an office pantsuit into a slinky LBD (little black dress). That being said, one of the biggest fears I hear from women is they are terrified of how they will look in a red or dark-colored lipstick. We all have that fear of going out in public, smiling at someone and, instead of flashing our pearly whites, we look like we got punched in the mouth because of all the lipstick on our teeth. This could cause anyone to run in the opposite direction when looking for a darker lipstick. However, I am still a huge advocate of red lipstick and what it can mean for any woman who wears it confidently. My objective today is to calm the anxious hesitations we have of wearing a red or darker-colored lipstick and hopefully change your opinion of these gorgeous shades by helping you understand which will look best based on your skin tone. Let’s start with a fair complexion. Those of us with cool undertones need to stick to reds with a bluish undertone. Have you ever heard that if you want the appearance of whiter teeth, wear a color with a bluish undertone? The blue undertone will not only give the appearance of whiter teeth, but will add vibrancy to your skin. If you prefer a more dark or vampy lipcolor, stick with a raspberry or cranberry hue. The cool pink undertones of these two colors can liven up your complexion and give a more playful appearance. For those of us with a medium complexion, we tend to be warmer than our fair counterparts. And for that, I would stick to an orange-based red lipstick and avoid anything with a bluish hue. Women with warm undertones or olive complexions can sometimes have a sallow appearance, so to offset or cancel that, orange tones are preferred. Burgundy hues are a great option as well. While they can be a little vampy looking, most burgundy colors play off very well to a warmer complexion. If you are dark complected, you want to veer toward a high-intensity color, while also keeping with the orangey-red colors. A bright fire-engine red lipcolor will certainly liven up your face. The

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softer the color, the more milky in appearance the product will appear on a darker complexion. The same idea goes for burgundy: You want a burgundy or wine-colored lipstick with a high pigmentation so the color doesn’t get lost on your skin. It can be a great contrasting color to your complexion and can break up how heavy makeup can appear if you have darker skin. Now let me suggest a few tips on application and how to wear these colors so it feels less intimidating. When you wear a red, dark wine or burgundy color, you’ll want to prime your lips. As the color wears throughout the day, it will begin to settle into the cracks and crevices of your lips and give a more aged appearance. To avoid or minimize this, first apply a scrub product to your lip or brush your lips with a toothbrush to remove any excess dry skin. Then apply chapstick or a primer to moisturize your lips before the application of your lipstick. Do this at the beginning of your makeup application rather than right before so it has time to soak into your lips. Once you are ready for lipstick, start by lining your lips with a matching lipliner (Tip: if you are olive/warm toned, apply a lipliner with a bluish undertone. This will cancel out the excessive orange undertones.) Fill in the entire lip with liner. This ensures intensity and longevity of the lip color. Applying a loose powder over your lip product also helps with longevity. Simply separate a piece of toilet paper into one ply, then place it directly over your lips and tap on the powder. The toilet paper will act as a filter, allowing just enough powder through to set your lipstick. This also prevents you from ruining your brush with the lipstick, and from looking like you tried to eat every powdered doughnut in the factory. A trick to wearing red lipstick is to outline the outer portions of your lip with a concealer that is half a shade lighter than your skin tone. The concealer acts as an eraser by covering any mistakes an unsteady hand creates when lining the lips or applying the product. It also helps create a sharper line when run across the edge of the lipliner. Just use any flat liner brush or eye

About Anne

Anne Hudson, a self-taught makeup artist, has had a passion for makeup since she was old enough to know what powder was. She could write a book about red lipstick, but for now, she’s offering her best tips in Flourish magazine. Have a question for Anne? Send it to rgautschy@semissourian.com, and you might find the answer in a future issue of Flourish.

shadow brush and the concealer product and run it against the edge of your lips. In contrast to the red, however, we want to soften the lines of a burgundy or wine-colored lipstick. If the line is too sharp or we draw the cupid’s bow too sharp, it gives the appearance of a more aged or even masculine look. You’ll want to round off the cupid’s bow a little, as that area is where it can appear sharp. Also, try using formulas with a satin or glossy finish. These types do not appear as dark as the matte formulas and can be a little more wearer-friendly. Red lipstick can be such a powerful lipcolor. If you decide to give it a go, let it be the focal point. Keep your eyes and cheeks in neutral colors and avoid piling on the bronzer. If the darker, more vampy colors are your preference, you can entertain a smokey eye look, but again, you don’t want to have a strong eye, cheek and lip. Have a focus area and stick to it, at least until you feel more comfortable with the color palette. With all this in mind, challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone this season and try something a little different. But no matter what you choose, always have confidence in yourself. That will always be your best look.

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style & beauty / fashion

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On Leslee, at left: Red “Happy Camper” T-shirt, blue and purple plaid flannel shirt with hood, distressed jeggings and green puffer vest with faux-fur trim, all available at Maurices in Cape Girardeau. Leslee also is wearing a gold LC Lauren Conrad “knot” bracelet from Kohl’s in Cape Girardeau, and her own boots. On Shalyn, at left: Free People jacket in moss with plaid flannel lining, Flying Monkey black midrise skinny jeans, BKE long-sleeve waffle-knit henley top in taupe, Buckle two-way camisole in rose brown, Khombu tall lace-up Adeline boots in tan and white, BKE pewter knotted necklace and BKE magnetic wrap-style bracelet in white with rhinestones, all available at The Buckle in Cape Girardeau. On Leslee, next page: Orange Creek furry fringe vest, Cello skinny jeans and handmade gold, turquoise and leather pendant, all available at Brickwood Boutique in Cape Girardeau, worn with a brown lacesleeve top and hat from Maurices, a black and gold choker necklace from Stash, and Coconuts by Matisse Miranda fringe booties in saddle shade from Stash.

HAPPY CAMPERS

COZY STYLES FOR OUTDOOR FUN

On Shalyn, pages 20 and 21: Articles of Society distressed skinny jeans, En Creme multicolor print kimono, black velvet choker necklace, CC Exclusives pink hat and Very Volatile Rissa bow-back sandals in blush suede, all available at Stash in Cape Girardeau, paired with a charcoal gray tank top from Maurices in Cape Girardeau. Other items: Stainless steel thermos, Sonoma gray plaid sherpa throw blanket and The Big One blue plaid throw, all available at Kohl’s in Cape Girardeau.

Photo gallery View more fashion photos at semissourian. com/flourish

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Photography by: Laura Simon Styling by: Brandon Whitaker Modeled by: Leslee Ricketts and Shalyn Tucker Shot on location in rural Cape Girardeau County with Leslee’s refurbished 1962 Shasta camper, nicknamed “Alma”

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style & beauty / bra boutique

THE POWER OF A GOOD FIT

Kriste Martin opens bra boutique in downtown Cape Girardeau By Logan Young

Kriste Martin is all about finding solutions. Martin, who opened Perfect Fit Bra Boutique on Oct. 19 on Broadway in downtown Cape Girardeau, says she originally came up with the idea to open her own bra shop when she herself couldn’t find a well-fitting bra in Southeast Missouri. “I’ve been actually wanting to do this for probably three or four years, and the reason why is I had always had trouble finding bras that fit, and I was having to travel to St. Louis to get them and it was really kind of aggravating,” she says. “Once I understood what constitutes a bra that fits well, I would see women that were wearing the wrong bra, and I knew myself what it did for me.” Finding the desire to provide “bra interventions” for the women around her, Martin decided to open Perfect Fit and provide the service herself, all with the goal of helping women look and feel better. “You have better posture, you feel better about yourself, your clothes look better, it really slims you — I don’t think people really understand this,” she says. Martin says her background of about 15 years in group health insurance has made the transition to store owner easy. “I really enjoy sales and meeting new people and helping people, so I was ready for a change and this is what I did,” she says. “I just wanted to help women feel their best and, too, I think, how fun to be in a retail boutique environment. Bras are not quite as serious business as health insurance.” Most importantly, Martin wants to help area women find that perfect fit and empower them through the perfect bra in a safe, clean and judgment-free environment. “I really want it to be about helping women feel good about themselves and looking great, feeling great, and there’s no judgment here,” she says.

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LAURA SIMON ~ lsimon@semissourian.com

Kriste Martin, owner of Perfect Fit Bra Boutique on Broadway in downtown Cape GIrardeau.

“

You have better posture, you feel better about yourself, your clothes look better, it really slims you — I don’t think people really understand this.

”

Martin has a number of solutions in stock for women unable to find the ideal bra for a certain situation. She offers maternity bras, nursing bras, mastectomy bras, sports bras and band sizes ranging from 28 to 54 and cup sizes from A to N, with prices averaging around $65. She also offers strap-

less bras for many sizes, up to an L in U.S. sizing. “It is not just for plus-sized, it is not just for full-busted, it is not just for a mastectomy patient or someone that’s nursing; we have bras in all sizes, all ranges,” she says. Martin also offers matching underwear pairings and loungewear from PJ Harlow, and she will begin offering loungewear from the Colombian company Options Intimate in December. She even has petite bra options for preteens and younger women. “We’ve got a lot of variety, different bras for different solutions,” she says. She says she plans to continue changing up her inventory by incorporating more colors and styles as vendors release them. All in all, she wants to empower women to take charge of how they look. “That’s what it’s all about, trying just to help women feel their best and look their best and have fun doing it,” she says.

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FEAT

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features / bodybuilding

Tara Landewee stays ﬁt with regular workouts at the Osage Centre in Cape Girardeau.

LAURA SIMON ~ lsimon@ semissourian.com

‘BEING HEALTHY MAKES YOU

FEEL FABULOUS’ Cape Girardeau women hit the bodybuilding circuit with serious strength and determination

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By Logan Young

Several months ago, Tara Landewee wrote her goal of appearing in a bikini bodybuilding competition on the goals board in the Osage Centre fitness room. A graduate of Southeast Missouri State University with a Bachelor of Science degree in health management with an option in health promotion, Landewee has been focused on her health and working out for most of her life. “I’d always been in the working-out field, but over the years I’d gotten more dedicated and more serious about it,” she says. In the past six months she started focusing on bodybuilding and bringing her fitness to a whole new level. “It had always been kind of like a dream to me,” she says. “It was something you wanted to set goals and do, but I was scared to death to do it, primarily because of the hard work, the dedication you gotta put in, the stage time — you actually have to do posing classes and you have to wear the bikinis.” At the time, a couple of her friends who also exercise at the Osage Centre had participated in competitions before and were looking to do another. They asked her to come along, and she decided to take the chance and compete. She hired a trainer and worked with him to set a meal plan and workout schedule. She met her goal with her first competition on Aug. 13 in Arnold, Missouri, after which she proudly added a note of completion on the goals board at the Osage. Working to get in bodybuilding shape has been no easy task, but Landewee says it’s all been worth it so far. “It still is intense and hard, but it’s getting easier,” she says. “I’m getting stronger, so I’ll just keep competing as well. The process becomes an addiction, I guess, kind of a little bit. It becomes a lifestyle after a while, because it’s fun.” Along the same lines, Annie Morozko, who works and trains at Snap Fitness in Cape Girardeau, has always had an interest in fitness and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. A veteran of the Marine Corps, she was no stranger to regular physical training. After serving four years as a corps member, she started to lift more weights and found inspiration from female bodybuilders on Instagram. Eventually, she found a coach on Instagram and decided to work toward becoming a bodybuilder. “It was kind of like my training was already there; it was more of the diet that I hadn’t done,” she says. “So I think lifting more and getting stronger and seeing what it does to your body, what it does to your mind, just kind of drives more to keep doing it.” Morozko competed in her first bikini competition in May 2015, and has most recently competed for a

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second time in a figure competition in September. Bikini competitions typically center on slim figures and less on muscle, whereas figure competitions focus on well-defined muscles and clear definition. In either situation, diet proves to be a key factor in terms of success. “Diet’s definitely one of the biggest things. You have to be really good about it because you can work all day long, but you’re never going to outwork a bad diet, so that’s what it comes down to,” Morozko says. On a personal level, Morozko says bodybuilding takes a supportive group of people who understand the process and the dedication it takes to improve and succeed. It also takes a positive mindset. “You have to do it to be happy with yourself, to be happy with where you get, and only compete with yourself … you have to be happy with you, and you kind of have to set your own goals when you’re training to beat yourself prior to that,” Morozko says. Along with role models she follows on Instagram, Morozko says her mom is an inspiration because even when facing obstacles, she has continued to work out and stay strong. “She is my inspiration … she has two knee replacements and her back’s been out a few times, and she’s gotten through it and still worked out, so I think it started me to be like, ‘OK, stop being a baby, you should probably do more,’” Morozko says, laughing. Bodybuilding also can be a platform to help others. Landewee says she wants to use her bodybuilding to encourage community members and people around her to live healthier lifestyles, and she is working toward educating people on how to live their best lives. “Being healthy makes you feel fabulous … I feel good all the time, and I’m able to pass that on to my kids as well as my family and friends,” she says. “I try to help them and encourage them to be healthy as well.” Although it can be fun, Landewee says bodybuilding presents a number of challenges and a hectic life, including meal preparation for a couple hours on Sundays and being in the gym hours upon hours during the week, not to mention more gym hours toward competition time. Morozko says the serious drive to want to see physical change in her body is what keeps her going in times of doubt. “You just have to have that realization that this is not always how it’s going to be, but if it’s something you wanted and it’s a goal you set, then how hard could it be to actually get there?” she says. “This is what you wanted to do, then that was your choice, so just do it … because nobody’s telling you you have to do it.” Morozko and Landewee both say they are working toward competitions planned for the spring.

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features / hope

‘YOU’RE ALWAYS STRONGER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE’ 2

1. Abigail Jensen, 5, plays with her grandfather Arnold Jensen in January 2011 at her family’s Oak Ridge home. 2. Nolan Weber’s senior photo. 3. Rachelle Weber, Nolan’s mother, addresses the crowd Sept. 13, 2014, before the start of the first Nolan Weber Believers 5k and Fun Run in Jackson. 4. Abby Jensen. 5. The Weber family at the Cure for Cape Cancer Gala in August 2013. 6. Participants take off from the starting line Sept. 13, 2014, during the first Nolan Weber Believers 5k and Fun Run in Jackson. 7. Nolan Weber talks with his mother, Rachelle Weber, in December 2011. (Submitted and Southeast Missourian file photos)

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No one wants to hear that their child has a terminal illness — but too many parents will hear that very news. Rachelle Weber and Megan Jensen share how they led their families through difficult times and kept moving forward. By Tyler Graef

It starts with a sense of shock. When your child gets a bad diagnosis or injury, as did Rachelle Weber’s oldest son Nolan, the world stops on a dime. “It’s like, ‘Did I really just hear that?’” she says “Is this going to affect the rest of our lives? It’s shock and denial.” For Megan Jensen, whose daughter Abigail was diagnosed with cancer in 2010, it was the same. When Abby started walking funny, Megan and her husband, Jon, thought she had eye problems. They took their 4-yearold to the optometrist, only to be referred to another doctor, whose CT scan revealed an unknown mass in their daughter’s brain. “I just put my face in my mom’s chest and cried,” Megan says. Jon did the same in Abby’s lap. “Then, after the first few minutes, we pulled ourselves together and said, ‘OK. Let’s fight. Let’s go,’” she says. Rachelle did the same. “There’s a sense of urgency that’s multiplied because they’re your child,” she says. “And that first step depends on who you’re dealing with at the time, if it’s a doctor or emergency room attendant or even just a spouse.” For her, it was going to St. Louis after Nolan had an unexpected seizure. For Megan it was similar — heading to St. Louis for a

diagnosis. Both women had other children at home, too. Megan was 10 weeks pregnant, and she says the most important thing for siblings is to make sure they know and feel they’re not forgotten. “I can remember at the hospital being in an elevator,” she says. “And overhearing two parents talking. We could tell from the way they were talking they’d been in the cancer world for a while. But we were new. One said to the other, ‘It’s OK to spoil your sick child. As long as you spoil their siblings, too.’” It stuck with Megan. It became her philosophy. Since the diagnosis, they saw every day with Abby as the precious gift it was. And so was every day with her other daughters, Mary-Beth and Emily and eventually Sara, too. Rachelle says it’s crucial to find time to spend with the other siblings. And if there’s no time, make time. Megan says that once, she surprised her oldest daughter by picking up her from school and taking her to the movies. “We saw ‘Ramona and Beezus,’” she says. “We were the only two in the theater. We had a popcorn fight and just enjoyed one another.” She says she wanted Abby’s siblings to look back and think about the good times they had with their sister, not just being in a hospital. And the situation’s weight is something

spouses have to share, Rachelle says. She, for example, is a natural planner. She poured herself into settling the logistical bramble of treatments and checkups. Her husband Dean, stronger in faith, became the family’s emotional anchor. “We complemented each other well,” she says. “It’s very difficult to do that as one person.” For the Jensens, the key was total openness. “Nothing was off the table,” Megan says. She knew a couple in St. Louis, she says, who had done the opposite, and it didn’t end well. After sending their daughter back for a radiation treatment, the husband broke down in tears. The wife told him to suck it up. That he was being a pansy. “So from then on, he held it all in,” Megan says. “Gave himself a heart attack.” Not communicating will only compound the problem, she says. “You’re two different books on two different pages,” she says. “But you have to figure out how to be on the same chapter.” Nolan Weber and Abigail Jensen passed away. Unfortunately, inevitably, the same will happen to other families in the future. But not all. So the most important thing, Rachelle says, is to keep going. Megan says the same. “People say, ‘Oh, I could never handle something like that,’” she says. “But they’re wrong. You’re always stronger than you think you are.”

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living / space

This undated photo provided by Betsy Burnham shows a home office designed by Burnham of L.A.â€™s Burnham Design. This home office doubles as a guest room. A pullout sofa serves as daytime seating and doubles as a bed for houseguests.

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TRIA GIOVAN/BETSY BURNHAM via Associated Press

11/1/16 10:52 AM

A FLEXIBLE SPACE

Create a room that’s perfect for guests, but practical for you, too By Melissa Rayworth

Associated Press Hosting houseguests can be a challenge under the best of circumstances. Having a well-designed, private space for them is a huge help, but many homeowners don’t have a dedicated room just for that. “Realistically, most people don’t have guests every week,” says interior designer Betsy Burnham, founder of Burnham Design in Los Angeles, so many people create hybrid guest room/home office spaces, or blend a guest room with a playroom or crafting room. The challenge is making the space warm and welcoming to guests but functional for other needs. Here, Burnham, small-space design expert Kathryn Bechen and Brian Patrick Flynn, founder of the design firm Flynnside Out Productions, offer advice: CREATE A FLEXIBLE SPACE If your home office will double as your guest room, Flynn suggests designing a creative work station that doesn’t feel like a corporate office. Instead of putting identical nightstands on either side of a bed or sofa bed, try mixing and matching bedside furniture, he says, “letting one of them be a desk or console table to double as a workstation.” And you may not want a queen-size bed dominating your workspace. Burnham notes there are many comfortable sofa beds these days. Or try a daybed with a trundle attachment. Decorate with structured cushions that give the appearance of a sofa by day, but are easily put aside at night. One great retro option: Burnham says there are modern Murphy beds with innovative designs that work well in smaller rooms.

TRIA GIOVAN/BETSY BURNHAM via Associated Press

This undated photo provided by Betsy Burnham shows a guest room designed by Burnham of L.A.’s Burnham Design. Built-in bunk beds create a welcoming sleep space for guests while using space efficiently in this guest bedroom.

satin.” Burnham’s new line of furniture, called Wardrobe, is upholstered in cozy, touch-friendly fabrics like soft linen, chambray and denim. If the room has a sleeper sofa or futon with a less-than-luxurious mattress, add softness with plush blankets, bed pillows and high-threadcount sheets. A sheepskin instantly warms up a guest room floor, Burnham says. Too many throw pillows on a sofa or bed, however, can be a nuisance for guests to remove each night and rearrange in the morning. So stick with a few luxurious ones that add beauty and comfort.

SHARING THE SPACE If the room is normally your office, decide whether you’ll completely withdraw from using it while guests are in town. If it’s possible to work COLOR AND TEXTURE elsewhere in the house for a few days, make that Another way to make a home office feel like a easier by keeping an attractive empty box or baswelcoming guest room is using color “to personal- ket on hand to gather work items for temporary ize the space and draw you in to rest,” says Flynn. relocation. “I use blue-grays and gray-greens because they’re If relocating isn’t practical, Bechen suggests soft and relaxing, but not too energetic.” discussing the subject up front, preferably before He also suggests using a range of textures in your guest arrives. upholstery, bedding and floor coverings. For ex“A lot of people work from home,” she says. “So ample, “Mix super-nubby textures like boucle that feel good on your feet with sleek ones like silk and Continued on page 43

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“

Realistically, most people don’t have guests every week,” says interior designer Betsy Burnham, founder of Burnham Design in Los Angeles, so many people create hybrid guest room/home office spaces, or blend a guest room with a playroom or crafting room.

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Q & A / style & beauty

SOUP-ER MEALS Nothing beats a big pot of soup for dinner — it’s easy, it hits the spot on cold nights, and you’re bound to have plenty of leftovers By Logan Young

As cooler months approach, comforting, home-cooked meals become household staples, especially when it comes to soup. “The family is ... more in the mood to gather around the table and all of those good smells, all of those good things that simmer all day long are what we’re in the mood for, I think, when it gets cooler out,” says Brooke Clubbs, recipe columnist for The Best Years and communications instructor at Southeast Missouri State University. As a mom of three, Clubbs says her favorite soup recipes typically are the ones her kids will eat, too. “I have found that when my kids help me cook, they’re more likely to eat whatever it is we’re making,” Clubbs says. “If they help make it, then it’s just less mysterious or something, so they have a little ownership as well.” She says certain recipes have become a tradi-

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SUPER-DUPER CHILI • 1 pound bulk pork sausage • 1 pound ground beef • 2 cans (16 ounces each) hot chili beans, undrained • 1 jar (16 ounces) salsa • 1 can (16 ounces) kidney beans, rinsed and drained • 1 can (15 ounces) pinto beans, rinsed and drained • 1 can (14 1/2 ounces) diced tomatoes, undrained • 1 can (10 3/4 ounces) condensed cream of mushroom soup • 1 can (8 ounces) tomato sauce • 8 ounces processed cheese (Velveeta), cubed • 1 1/2 teaspoons chili powder • 1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper In a large soup kettle or Dutch oven, cook the sausage and beef over medium heat until no Read on for several of Clubbs’ and McCla- longer pink; drain. Stir in the remaining ingredients. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and nahan’s favorite soup recipes: tion in her family, like the “Super-Duper Chili” she makes every Halloween. Also no stranger to traditional and nostalgic soup recipes is Susan McClanahan, Good Times columnist and administrator at the Cape Girardeau Senior Center, whose favorite soup is her mother’s vegetable beef recipe. “There’s nothing like making a humongous pot of soup … and part of that is a lot of good memories,” McClanahan says. “Not only does it taste fantastic, but part of it is emotional.” Whether making it for your family or sharing it with friends and neighbors, McClanahan says a large pot of soup has the ability to bring people together. “Heating it up for later, sharing it with friends and family or freezing it to use later — all of those are keys to making that humongous big pot of soup,” she says.

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soup / living Add all remaining ingredients, except cabbage and barley. Bring to a simmer. Add barley. Adjust seasoning. Simmer a few minutes, then add cabbage and simmer until barley is done, about 20 minutes. Stir gently, but make sure to get all the way to the bottom to avoid sticking. Add water or beef broth as needed to make the soup as thick or thin as you desire. Check for seasoning. Cool properly and divide to share with family and friends, or freeze small containers for later use. (Submitted by Susan McClanahan)

Stock photo

simmer for 30 minutes or until heated through. Yield: 14 servings (3 1/2 quarts). (Submitted by Brooke Clubbs, via “Taste of Home”) VEGETABLE BEEF SOUP Start out with a very large pot, like a canner or 12- to 16-quart stock pot. This makes a large batch of soup. • 4 1/2 pounds ground beef • 2 onions, chopped • 7 or 8 medium potatoes, peeled and cubed • 1 bag (16 ounces) frozen carrots • 1 bag (16 ounces) frozen lima beans • 1 bag (24 ounces) frozen green beans • 1 bag (16 ounces) frozen whole kernel corn • 2 large cans (28 ounces each) whole tomatoes, chopped, with juice Rinse cans with half full amount of water and add to pot. • 3 boxes (32 ounces) 50 percent less sodium beef broth • 1 can (46 ounces) V-8 juice, rinse can with a little water and add to pot • 1 cup quick-cooking barley • 1/3 cup sugar Check and adjust for salt and pepper. • 1 medium head cabbage, chopped Cook beef and onion together, adding salt and pepper while cooking. Drain.

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EIGHT CAN TACO SOUP • 1 can (15 ounces) black beans, drained and rinsed • 1 can (15 ounces) pinto beans, drained and rinsed • 1 can (14.5 ounces) petite diced tomatoes, drained • 1 can (15.25 ounces) sweet corn, drained • 1 can (12.5 ounces) white chicken breast, drained • 1 can (10.75 ounces) cream of chicken soup • 1 can (10 ounces) green enchilada sauce • 1 can (14 ounces) chicken broth • 1 packet taco seasoning Mix all ingredients together in a large pot. Heat until warm, stirring occasionally. Serve with tortilla chips. (Submitted by Brooke Clubbs, via highheelsandgrills. com) CROCK-POT MINESTRONE SOUP • 1 can (15 ounces) white beans, drained, rinsed (cannellini or navy) • 1 32-ounce container reduced-sodium chicken broth (or vegetable broth for vegetarians) • 2 teaspoons olive oil • 1/2 cup chopped onion • 1 cup diced carrots • 1/2 cup diced celery • 2 garlic cloves, minced • 1 can (28 ounces) petite diced tomatoes • Parmesan cheese rind (optional) • 1 fresh rosemary sprig • 2 bay leaves • 2 tablespoons chopped fresh basil • 1/4 cup chopped fresh Italian parsley • 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt and fresh black pepper • 1 medium 8-ounce zucchini, diced • 2 cups chopped fresh (or frozen defrosted) spinach • 2 cups cooked small pasta such as ditalini, al

dente (or GF pasta) • Extra Parmesan cheese for garnish (optional) Crock-Pot version: Puree beans with 1 cup of the broth in a blender. Heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add the carrots, celery, onion and garlic and saute until tender and fragrant, about 15 minutes. Transfer to the Crock-Pot, along with the remaining broth, tomatoes, pureed beans, Parmesan cheese rind, salt and pepper. Add the rosemary, basil and parsley; cover and cook on low for 6 to 8 hours. Forty minutes before the soup is done cooking, add zucchini and spinach. Cover and cook 30 more minutes. Remove bay leaves, rosemary sprig and Parmesan rind and season to taste with salt and black pepper. Ladle 1 1/4 cups soup into 8 bowls, with 1/4 cup pasta in each, and top with extra Parmesan cheese if desired. Stovetop directions: Puree beans with 1 cup of the broth in a blender. Heat oil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Add the carrots, celery, onion and garlic and saute until tender and fragrant, about 15 minutes. Add the remaining broth, tomatoes, pureed beans, Parmesan cheese rind, salt and pepper. Add the rosemary, basil and parsley, cover and cook on low 40 minutes. Add the zucchini and spinach, cover and simmer until the zucchini is tender, about 8 to 10 minutes. Remove the bay leaves, rosemary sprig, Parmesan rind and season to taste with salt and black pepper. Ladle 1 1/4 cups soup into 8 bowls with 1/4 cup pasta in each and top with extra Parmesan cheese if desired. (Submitted by Brooke Clubbs, via skinnytaste.com) SLOW COOKER BROCCOLI CHEESE SOUP • 1/3 cup butter, sliced • 1 1/2 cups chopped yellow onion • 2 cloves garlic, minced • 6 tablespoons all-purpose flour • Salt and freshly ground black pepper • 2 cans (12 ounces) evaporated milk • 5 cups low-sodium chicken broth • 5 cups small diced broccoli florets* • 1/8 teaspoon dried thyme Continued on page 44

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living / pets

Paws & Effect

Keep pets safe during the holidays By Stacy Busch-Heisserer

It’s the holiday season! Decorations, parties and food are just a few of the things we humans look forward to this time of year. Your pet? Not so much. Before you decorate the house, host the party or bake the cookies, take into consideration your pet’s needs and safety. Your dog and cat thrive on routine, so try to keep your pet’s schedule as close to normal as possible.

your pet, it’s a temptation that might be hard to resist. Dangers lurk at every corner, from the Christmas tree to the lights outside. Secure your Christmas tree so it won’t tip and fall, which might cause injury to your pet. Cats are notorious for climbing up Christmas trees, so if you have a way to fence it off, all the better. There are some cute fencing ideas on Pinterest that look like they are part of the decorations, but they really are working to keep kitty out of the tree. Keep decorations on the safe side by eliminating stringy, shiny tinsel, which, if ingested, can obstruct the digestive tract, cause severe vomiting, dehydration and involve possible surgery. Consider plastic ornaments instead of glass, since those can break and cut pads of feet or, even worse, be swallowed and cause damage to your pet’s mouth or digestive tract. Keep wires, batteries and light strands out of reach of your dog or cat. A wire can cause a shock or worse if chewed, and a punctured battery can cause burns to the mouth and esophagus. Avoid “live” wreaths and garland that might be made of mistletoe or holly. Holly, if ingested, can cause pets to suffer nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. Mistletoe can cause gastrointestinal upset and cardiovascular problems. Lilies can cause kidney failure in cats if ingested. To be safe, stick to artificial plants made of silk or plastic. TIP: Spend some quality time with your pet each evening during the holiday season. Walk the dog or play with your dog or cat to expend some of their pent-up energy. Pets are less likely to act out if they are worn out.

FOOD Holiday baking can be a temptation to your dog or cat. Besides chocolate, raisins and grapes, keep your pet away from anything sweetened with xylitol, which is a sugar substitute. It can be found in sugar-free gum, baked goods, breath mints and cough syrup. Keep your pet away from the holiday table and don’t let him counter surf for unattended plates of yummy people food. Make sure garbage cans are secure and unable to be tipped over by a nosy pet. If the family pet is allowed to attend the celebration, just say no to human foods as treats. Don’t let guests treat the dog with bones, spicy foods or sweets. Keep cocktail mixers out of reach also. Alcohol can cause vomiting, diarrhea, labored breathing and an increase in body temperature, and that’s not the worst of it. Dogs’ bodies are not designed to drink alcohol and it can ultimately cause lasting kidney damage. TIP: When hosting a dinner party, give your dog an interactive toy or bone that will keep him occupied while you entertain. Look for a toy that has a place to put peanut butter, coconut oil or treats so dogs have to work to ENTERTAINING Some pets are not fans of guests in their get to the good stuff. Freeze it for an even longer lasting treat. The toy will work his home. If your dog or cat is not accustomed to mind and body and keep him out of trouble. loud noises, give him a quiet space to retreat to, complete with water, a comfy place to sleep and some toys. Many dogs prefer the DECORATIONS A festive house is a happy house, right? To comfort of their crate, and it can be moved

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About Stacy

Stacy Busch-Heisserer is the owner of Busch Pet Products and Deer Creek Doggie Day Camp in Cape Girardeau. She is a lifelong animal lover who has four cats and four dogs.

“

Before you decorate the house, host the party or bake the cookies, take into consideration your pet’s needs and safety.

”

into another room if necessary. Cats might prefer to hide under a bed or in the closet to escape the noise. New Year’s celebrations can be noisy, but also messy. Strings of confetti can get lodged in a cat or dog’s intestines and may require surgery. Small pieces from noisemakers are a crunchy treat for some dogs. Poppers can scare pets and cause damage to sensitive ears. If fireworks are part of the New Year’s celebration, be sure to keep pets in a safe and secure area as the countdown begins. TIP: If you have animal-loving guests and your pets are comfortable around new acquaintances, by all means, let them meet! Dogs especially love to be petted and played with, so why not let your guests wear out your precious pup? The holidays can be a special time if you have a pet in your life, and with a little preparation, it can be a happy and safe time also!

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age appropriate / artwork

TAMARA EATON DESIGN/HGTV.com/Scripps Netwroks LLC via AP

This photo provided by HGTV.com shows a home work space designed by Tamara Eaton featuring an oversized pinboard extending all the way to the ceiling, perfect for displaying all the newest kids artwork coming in. An antique rotating cabinet, right, also provides useful storage with unique flair.

#imadethis

Ideas for hanging on to school-year memories and artwork By MELISSA RAYWORTH

Associated Press Kids often come home from school bearing armfuls of classroom art. The evenings bring comments about their dayâ€™s events and sometimes hilarious descriptions of their world. Parents are sure theyâ€™ll save and remember all those paper creations and memorable words. But the pace of life soon takes over, and even organized moms and

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FISKARS via Associated Press

This photo provided by Fiskars shows magazine pages used to frame a cork board. Rolling pages and affixing to a mirror or cork board to frame it is a great way to personalize a basic dorm item.

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plastic sleeves in a three-ring dads can end up inundated. binder. Her kids love thumbing It’s worth creating a system through their binders from past to manage the flow because school years. school artwork can quickly pile “While I’m in charge of the up, says Laura Russell, founder books now and don’t let the kids of the craft blog makelifelovely. pull them out unless I’m sitting com and a mother of four. With with them, I plan on giving just a bit of creative effort, you them their books when they’re can also find ways to hold onto older,” she says. all those funny comments you’ll Another suggestion for storwant to remember years from ing and celebrating art: “Scan now. the favorite pieces as they come Here are four easy projects to home. From those scans you can help do that: make a slideshow for each year 1. Follow them with photos. of school,” Russell says. “Life You can build on the trend FLYNNSIDE OUT PRODUCTIONS/HGTV.com/ is short, and the artwork that of snapping and posting “first Scripps Networks LLC via AP comes home right now can be day of school” photos by addThis photo provided by HGTV.com a wonderful way to tie generaing written notes in your kids’ shows a boys bathroom designed by tions together.” Brian Patrick Flynn featuring framed own handwriting, says Kayla children’s art on the walls, perfect for 3. Save their sayings. Kitts, special projects editor at displaying all the newest kids artwork Buy a paper date book for HGTV.com. Take a photo on coming in. each child (it can be for the curthat first day, and that evening rent calendar year or for the 18 have kids write out a page listmonths that begin in July and run through the end of ing their current dreams and favorites. next year). Make sure the book offers writing space Include five or 10 questions about anything you’d for each day — ideally half a page. Keep the book in a like: the career they’d love to have someday, their fahigh-traffic spot at home with a pen attached. vorite school lunch, best friend, favorite class. Have When one of the kids says something you’ll want them write it out in their own handwriting to preto remember, write it on that day’s page. Then, during serve that, too, says Kitts. Then scan or photograph the weekends, ask your child to describe the previthe page. ous week at school. If they wish, they also can draw Do the same on the day before their December pictures. It’s a wonderfully analog way to preserve a holiday break, and again during the final week of school year in our digital world. school. A twist on that: Kitts suggests keeping a few glass Then supplement those three photos and images of jars around the house, along with slips of blank paper their written surveys with other photos from school and a pen. When your child thinks of something they events or candid shots with friends, or scans of their want to preserve, have them jot it down, write the date school artwork. Lay it all out in a photo book you can on it and put it in a jar. You can do the same. order online. Whether it’s a jar, book or even a note typed into “It’s a really cool book to give grandparents,” Kitts your phone, “just write down those precious memosays, and is a keepsake your child will enjoy in the ries now,” Russell says. “We think we’ll never forget future. those precious words and how old our kids were when At the end of elementary school, you can easily they said them, but the fact is that we do forget.” create a book that includes these photos and written 4. Have a rotating display of art in their rooms. comments as a gift to a special teacher. Kitts suggests hanging a few empty frames in vari2. Winnow their work. ous sizes filled with a thin sheet of cork on your child’s Russell begins each year by setting aside a big bedroom wall. Place pushpins in the corners of each file-folder box for each child. She labels one hanging frame. When your child brings home art they’re exfolder for each month, with some spares in case files cited about, pin it into a frame. The pins make it easy fill up before a month ends. If that level of organization sounds too ambitious, to rotate artwork in and out. If the walls are already full, try hanging a length of keep a large plastic bin handy. twine and use clothespins to hang a rotating selection “Stuff all the art in there,” Russell says, and go of school artwork. through it periodically, asking each child which pieces Useful move as the year wears on: Each time you are their favorites. reach into the bin of creations to select something Once you’ve pared things down to their favornew to display, choose a few items to discard. ites and yours, Russell suggests slipping the art into

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age appropriate / shyness

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Stock photo

11/1/16 10:52 AM

‘IT’S OK TO BE QUIET’

Shyness is normal, but at times may signal underlying issues By Suzanne Thompson Cozza

Parents want their children to have happy lives. Part of that happiness involves being engaged with peers and with others in the community. For kids who are shy, that can be a bit tricky, but some people are just hard-wired that way, experts say. “Some of us are predisposed; we are shy, reticent about speaking,” says Utahna Hancock, a licensed professional counselor who specializes in couples and family therapy at The Dale & Hancock Center in Cape Girardeau. “While some of us are outgoing and want to be right in the middle of things, other people are introverted speakers and think things out by reading.” Even though parents may be tempted to push their children into more open interaction, Sue Cook, a retired school counselor, says the problem is not necessarily the child. “Parents need to not impose their standards for socialization onto their children,” she says. “Let the child be who he is. It’s OK to be quiet.” Some children just have difficulty knowing how to handle social situations, Cook says, and the parents can help out a lot just by letting the child know what to expect. “You might say, ‘We’re going to Aunt Martha’s house. She’s loud, and her house is always messy,’” Cook suggests. Role playing, a tool frequently used by therapists, also can be used by parents to help ease a child’s fears about meeting new people. Cook poses a scenario in which a parent is taking a child to the office to meet co-workers. “When we get there, someone might ask you how you like school. What would you say if someone asks you how you like school?” she suggests. This gives the child an opportunity to think

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through the situation instead of being put on the spot. Knowing what to expect can go a long way toward making a child feel more at ease, which can help them for years to come. “When we help our kids work through things, we are empowering them,” Cook says. In some cases, a child may want to make friends at school, but just doesn’t know how to do it. Hancock says she sometimes makes suggestions that might help, like encouraging a shy child who’s afraid to ask to join a group playing ball, to stand on the outskirts tossing his own ball up and down. That could lead to an invitation to join the game. Other children, who weren’t necessarily born with a timid personality, choose that behavior. “Some kids are not shy, but they use the shyness disguise, because life experiences have taught them not to trust anybody,” Hancock says. “They’re going to hold back and size up the situation before they commit themselves.” Children whose parents had a bad divorce or have had substance abuse issues, or children who were victims of physical or sexual abuse, may hide behind a veneer of silence. “These kids are cautious,” she says. “They’re not going to commit themselves to revealing anything about themselves until they know for sure that they can trust you, and it’s not easy to come by, getting the trust of a kid who has come through some pretty tough times.” The absolute worst thing to do is label a child by saying, “He’s shy.” Instead, when the child ducks behind the parents’ legs to hid from strangers, try, “We’re just going through a cautious stage, but she’ll get over it,” or “We’re just not feeling like talking today,” Hancock suggests. “Just let them know that it’s not a label that has to stick,” she says. According to Cook, who retired after a 20-

year career in school counseling and worked for 11 years before that as a mental health counselor, there are several behavioral red flags that might signal a problem. “Parents can tell when they’re not sleeping, not wanting to go to school, or crying because they don’t have any friends,” Cook says. These behaviors may mean it’s time to seek professional help for the child. “Shyness becomes a real issue when kids are too shy to go to school,” Hancock says. “Those kinds of issues could be attributed to high anxiety or a person who has a low threshold to stress. That’s where we therapists come in.” This type of therapy is generally not longterm. “Most kids who come in with shyness or anxiety are not usually with me more than three months, six months at the most,” she says. “We start with once a week and stretch the sessions out to once every two weeks or once a month.” Therapy can take several forms, Cook says, but for younger children, play therapy is the way to go. Therapists may use puppets to help children articulate their issues. “They will naturally pick up the puppets and start acting out what’s going on in their lives,” Cook says. Art therapy is another form of play therapy. Hancock is a board-certified art therapist and explains that effective art therapy may bring a different but happy challenge, because play therapy is fun. “They don’t want to quit,” she says. In cases like these, she sometimes ends the therapy by telling the child she believes he can handle it on his own, but often the therapy ends at the child’s request. “One of these days, they come in and I always hope they’re going to say, ‘OK, I’m all right now.’ I love it when they say that,” Hancock says.

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age appropriate / parenting

Parents: Are you guilty of arguing in front of your kids? (Part 2) By Shannon Anderson

In the last issue, we covered some of the effects parental conflict can have on children. This time we’ll cover ways to at least reduce the harm caused by such arguing and conflict — and, in certain cases, if done correctly, ways of handling conflict that can actually model for your child appropriate conflict resolution and problem-solving skills they can use themselves. Almost all relationships involve conflict at one time or another. So how should you, as a parent, handle arguments and conflicts to reduce harm to your child as much as possible? Let’s start with some obvious things to avoid when it comes to arguing around your child. Avoid intense yelling, screaming and physical violence. Obviously you should refrain from yelling, screaming or physical conflicts of any kind. If violent verbal or physical arguments are occurring, it’s best to seek the help of a trained marriage counselor or other relationship expert. Ongoing problems in this area will undermine any relationship and is unhealthy. Never criticize each other. No matter how angry you get at your partner, never criticize or talk badly about him or her. Remember your child identifies with both of you and the last thing he or she needs to hear is one parent belittling or running down the other. Doing this can cause lasting harm to your child’s self-esteem and undermine his or her relationship with you. Never ask your child to take sides. Unfortunately, some parents try to get the child to

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align with them. Or perhaps the child may feel the urge to do so on his own. This should be discouraged at all costs. If this occurs, the child may feel aligned with one parent but at the same time feel like he is rejecting the other parent. This is never a good position for the child to be put in and also causes harm. Don’t confide in your child when it comes to parental conflict. While this is a temptation for some parents, resist doing this. If you’re struggling and need emotional support, confide in a friend, adult family member or a trusted co-worker. But never seek this emotional support from your child. As a parent, you want to model being in control of your emotions and appropriate ways of handling your own emotions. Remember, your child is looking to you for guidance in how to learn this life skill for himself. Offer limited information to the child. After an argument your child has witnessed or overheard, you can offer some limited information so the child knows a little more about what’s going on. Children tend to think egocentrically and often will blame themselves for parental conflicts and arguments if you don’t provide some explanation of what’s really going on. But don’t go overboard here. Give the basics and be sure your child knows it’s not his or her fault. The last thing you want is your child blaming himself for the conflicts. You could try saying something like, “Mom and Dad are not getting along about something right now, but we are trying to work things out. It’s not about you, and we both love you very much.” This reassurance is vital to help your child maintain a healthy self-esteem.

About Shannon

Shannon Anderson is a licensed professional counselor and a national certified counselor and owner and clinical director of Tender Hearts Child Therapy Center in Cape Girardeau.

So now you know what to avoid. Let’s also cover some points about how to model healthy, positive conflicts that can actually have a positive effect on your child. If you have a healthy argument with a partner and a child witnesses or even overhears it, this can be a way for you to model problem-solving and conflict resolution skills. Parents who model healthy conflict resolution skills are teaching their children how to handle conflicts themselves. Think about it this way. Your child looks up to you as a role model, as someone who guides him not only through your words, but perhaps even more importantly, your actions as well. Parents who are able to model healthy conflict resolution are teaching their children a variety of skills — problem-solving, feelings, expression and how to compromise, to name a few. These are important skills that every child must learn at some point. So there you have it — some things to avoid with parental conflict and some healthy ways such arguments can more positively affect your child. I’d love to hear your thoughts and I welcome any questions or feedback! Just email me at shannona@tenderheartschildtherapycenter. com.

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parenting / age appropriate

Avuncular avuncular: avun·cu·lar

avun·cu·lar\ə-ˈvəŋ-kyə-lər\

adjective like an uncle: kind or friendly like an uncle When I first learned this definition, it forever became imprinted in mind as “like my Uncle Denny.” My mom’s younger brother, Dennis, was the kind of guy who took a home movie when he found my cousin and me, two guilty-looking toddlers, covered in baby powder. When I had a ’50s-themed birthday party, he gave my guests and me a ride in his convertible. He could be counted on to get doughnuts if you stayed overnight or to take you for a Dilly Bar on the way home from church. In fact, he brought Dilly Bars to the ICU waiting room when his father was being treated for a stroke. He couldn’t stand to see all of us grandkids so sad, and he said nobody could be sad while eating a Dilly Bar. And thus, avuncular was, to me, a very high compliment. When my dad died six years ago, Uncle Denny drove down from my hometown of Kankakee, Illinois, to stay with my mom for a few days. When he came over to our house, I walked out of my room to greet him and found he was already playing with my kids. Because his grandchildren called him “Pops,” my kids called him “Uncle Pops.” He could

never replace my dad, but he was letting me know he would help make sure my kids would still get a grandfather’s kind of love and fun. Uncle Denny wasn’t the only uncle in my life. There’s Uncle Paul, my mom’s older brother, a gifted artist and poet with a dry sense of humor. There’s Uncle Sam, my Aunt Dodie’s husband, who can always help you out and give financial advice. There’s my Aunt Teresa’s husband, Tom, the doctor, who joined our family in my adulthood and likes to talk health and politics with me. And then there was my Uncle Gil, my dad’s only brother, who died in a car accident when I was 3. I have a few pictures of him holding me, but only one memory — and that’s of my dad holding me up and whispering for me to say, “Goodbye, Big Shooter,” as we passed the casket. In August, my Uncle Denny suddenly, impossibly, left us, succumbing to a heart condition the doctors hadn’t been able to effectively treat. I found myself whispering to Lily, my youngest daughter, “Say, ‘See you later, Uncle Pops,’” as we passed his casket. In the novel and movie “Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close,” young Oskar narrates, “If the sun were to explode, you wouldn’t even know about it for eight minutes because that’s how long it takes for light to travel to us. For eight minutes the world would still be bright and it

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About Brooke

Brooke Hildebrand Clubbs is an instructor of communication studies and director of health communication at Southeast Missouri State University. She (literally) runs around Jackson, where she lives with one husband, three kids and two dogs. She credits a lot of her writing style to her Uncle Denny. His work can be found at daily-journal.com. Hers can be found at brookehclubbs.wordpress.com.

would still feel warm. It was a year since my dad died and I could feel my eight minutes with him ... were running out.” I’m trying to hang on to the brightness and warmth of my Uncle Denny. I still have my last Facebook messages with him on my phone. There’s one where he was asking me about something he later worked into his second to last column at The Daily Journal. In the one before that, I was thanking him for showing my son, Eli, such a good time on a recent visit to Kankakee. “Thanks for being a great Uncle Pops,” I told him. He replied with some more details about their adventures and ended with, “It was fun. You’re welcome. I guess this is my role. To remind kids that they should be fun uncles someday.” So the purpose of this column isn’t to lament sudden deaths, although they do lend immediacy to this message. The purpose is to encourage you to be avuncular. (Yes, even if you are a woman — though the term for “aunt like” is materternal.) Be generous. Look for the fun in life. Love people. #livelikedennis. I feel like my eight minutes with my uncle can be extended if I live like he did, and maybe inspire others around me to do the same.

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Continued from page 31

A FLEXIBLE SPACE the issue is being considerate and sensitive, and having good communication.” Let your guest know if there are specific hours when you must use the room, so they can plan to go out or just relax elsewhere in your home during that time. To avoid intruding on your guest at other times of day, Bechen suggests using highend paper and ribbons to make a handcrafted “Do Not Disturb” sign for the room’s door. CLOSET AND STORAGE If the room includes a closet, leave it partially empty so guests will have a place for suitcases and other items. Deep shelves in a closet are ideal for a guest’s clothing. And if the closet is deep enough, Flynn suggests placing a dresser inside. Guests can have access to one or more drawers and use the top as a vanity. Also consider adding a storage ottoman or trunk to the room for hiding blankets and pillows so you won’t have to gather them from elsewhere in the house when a guest is arriving. All three designers recommend having lots of closed storage so you can stash your things out of sight when someone is visiting. FINAL TOUCHES Add an extra power strip so guests can charge digital devices, and print out your Wi-Fi password for easy reference. If the visitor is an old friend or relative, create a small photo album of images from your shared past and place it on the nightstand. Bechen suggests adding some of the details you’d find in a luxury hotel room. Put out a basket with sample sizes of good toiletries. Add a bouquet of fresh flowers and a basket of snacks. If you have space, create a small drink station on a dresser top or table. On a pretty tray, place a small coffee maker, a basket of tea bags and coffee, a few bottles of water, and some glasses and mugs. To complete the hotel feel, Bechen suggests making a little information binder about local sights and activities to help visitors get the most out of their time in your town.

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Continued from page 7

MONEY RESOLUTIONS

away, or the house payment that feels like it just keeps going up because of that escrow account, continued diligence will allow you to pay down debt.” She suggests using a Google search to find out about the debt-snowball effect and using the information for an increased chance at success. For those with more than one credit card, consolidating the debt is an option. “Consider your options for transferring your balance(s) to a credit card offering zero percent on balance transfers,” says Balsmann, who cautions consumers to read the terms and conditions before consolidating credit cards. “Beware! Typically there is a fee associated with this transaction. However, if you do your math, you may come out ahead in the long run.” After the holidays, when cash is short, some people pay bills late or miss payments, which might affect the credit rating, so it’s a good idea to keep an eye on check credit reports. “Knowing your credit score and what makes up that score is a start,” Bonner says. Everyone is entitled to three free credit reports each year, and a copy of it after being denied credit. “The three major credit bureaus (Experian, TransUnion and Equifax) will provide you one free credit report each year. Just visit www.annualcreditreport.com,” Balsmann says. Spacing those requests out helps consumers monitor their score throughout the year.

“If you only pull one of the bureaus this time around, you still have two more pulls left for the remainder of the year in case you like to keep tabs every so often,” she says. The number on your credit report could be wrong, and credit reporting agencies must investigate possible errors and correct them. “One in five people have mistakes on their credit report that they are unaware of,” Bonner says. Those who suspect their credit scores are incorrect may file a dispute. “The credit bureaus each have an online process for disputing incorrect information,” Balsmann says. “They are obligated to reply to your dispute or resolve the issue within 30 days.” If a low score on a credit report is correct, don’t despair — it can always be improved. “If you have accounts that are reporting unsatisfactorily on your report, clean them up,” Balsmann says. “By that I mean pay off those collection accounts, get rid of those judgments, bring those past due payments up to date, and reduce those maxed-out credit cards.” One of the best ways to avoid credit card debt is by paying in cash, and a savings plan can help make that possible. It’s never too early to start one and start saving for next year. “State your goal for the new year and write it down,” Taylor says. “Make the goal visible by posting a picture of it on your refrigerator or computer screen.”

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SOUP-ER MEALS

• 1/2 cup heavy cream • 12 ounces sharp cheddar cheese, freshly shredded (or more to taste) • 2 ounces Parmesan cheese, freshly and finely shredded Melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add onions and saute until they begin to soften, about 3 or 4 minutes. Add garlic and flour and season lightly with salt and pepper, then cook, stirring constantly, 2 minutes. While whisking, slowly pour in evaporated milk (whisk well to smooth). Cook mixture, stirring constantly, until it begins to thicken, then pour into a slow cooker along with chicken broth, diced broccoli and thyme. Cover with lid and cook on high heat for 2 1/2 to 3 hours or low heat for 6 hours. Turn heat to warm (or off ) and stir in heavy cream, then add shredded cheddar and Parmesan and stir to blend. Season with salt and pepper to taste and serve warm. *From about 20 ounces broccoli crowns, large stems cut off and discarded (or reserved for an-

other use), florets diced into small pieces. (Submitted by Brooke Clubbs, via cookingclassy.com) CORN SAUSAGE CHOWDER • 1 pound bulk pork sausage, mild or hot, according to taste • 1 cup chopped onion • 4 cups peeled and cubed potatoes (or equivalent of canned sliced potatoes, drained) • 1 teaspoon salt • 1/8 teaspoon pepper • 2 cups water • 1 can (17 ounces) creamed style corn • 1 can (17 ounces) whole kernel corn, drained • 1 can (12 ounces) evaporated milk In a pan, cook sausage and onion until browned. Drain on paper towel. Boil together water, potatoes and salt until tender. Add sausage to potatoes and water. Add remaining ingredients and warm through. If chowder is too thick, add a little of the juice from the drained canned corn to thin down. I always serve apple muffins with this chowder, as it is

a perfect go-together with the pork sausage. I use a boxed apple muffin mix, in the interest of time. (Submitted by Susan McClanahan) SHRIMP CHOWDER • 2 tablespoons butter • 1 medium onion, chopped • 1 can cream of potato soup, undiluted • 3 1/2 cups milk • 1/4 teaspoon ground red pepper • 1 1/2 pounds medium fresh shrimp, peeled • 1 cup (4 ounces) shredded Monterey Jack cheese • Fresh snipped parsley, for garnish Melt butter in large pot or Dutch oven over medium heat; add onion and sauté until tender. Stir in cream of potato soup, milk and pepper. Bring to a boil. Add shrimp; reduce heat and simmer about 5 minutes, stirring occasionally, until shrimp turn pink. Stir in cheese until melted. Garnish with fresh snipped parsley if desired, and serve immediately. Yields 12 cups. (Submitted by Susan McClanahan)

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Trim that tree

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Page 54

Page 57

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2016 ‘TIS THE SEASON’ A GUIDE TO YOUR HOLIDAYS

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‘tis the season / thanksgiving

HOLIDAY EQUATIONS

A cheat sheet to take the mystery out of Thanksgiving math Or perhaps you need to know how many pies to serve. Tally the total number of guests, then add AP Food Editor another eight guests to that number to account for your niece’s heartthrob of the moment (who may Thanksgiving math actually isn’t all that hard. or may not come, but if he does will eat an entire You just need to use a few basic equations. pie himself ). Now subtract 12 from your total to For example, to estimate the amount of wine account for the guests who without warning will you’ll need, begin by multiplying the number of indiagnose themselves as gluten-sensitive, fruit-free, laws you are expecting by the estimated number of paleo-centric or anti-sugar. Buy that many pies. offensive jokes your uncle is likely to tell (remember How big a turkey should you get? This one is to round up). Take the product of that and multiply more complicated. Start by making a list of everyit by the number of children likely to overhear the one coming to dinner. Rate each guest on an anoffensive jokes. Buy that many bottles of wine. By J.m. Hirsch

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noyance scale of 1 to 10. Bump up the rating by 2 points for any guest likely to spend the day standing in the kitchen distracting you. Tally all of the ratings, then divide by the total number of guests. If the final score is 5 or more, don’t waste your money on any turkey. You’ll probably overcook it while being annoyed and distracted by guests. For more help navigating the Thanksgiving math minefield, we’ve assembled a cheat sheet to the most common culinary calculations. And because this is Thanksgiving, all estimates are generous to allow for plenty of seconds and leftovers.

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‘tis the season / holiday décor

Holiday decor is on display in the home of Linda McKinnis, owner of Design Exclusive.

LAURA SIMON ~ lsimon@semissourian.com

A FESTIVE FEATURE

Start with the dinner table to make a holiday decor statement By Logan Young

Wintertime is nearly upon us, and when it comes to table decorations, who can resist a festive centerpiece or table feature to help pull a gathering of friends and family together? Linda McKinnis of Design Exclusive in Cape Girardeau says first and foremost, holiday tables should mesh well with a room’s existing decorations and design.

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“Sometimes traditional colors simply clash with most interiors,” she says. “Enhance your design to match your existing color scheme and choose colors that complement your room.” Jenna Beussink, owner of Renaissance in downtown Cape Girardeau, says trends are migrating toward dripping, flowing organic looks that include natural arrangements with succulents, rich colors and leafy greens.

LAURA SIMON ~ lsimon@semissourian.com

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11/1/16 10:52 AM

“I think the trends I’m seeing are that people are going for a more natural look, a more organic, romantic, flowy look with centerpieces and floral arrangements in general,” she says. McKinnis says popular ideas she’s seeing this year include whimsical touches, pops of color or unusual color schemes and that young couples are moving toward retro components. Additionally, she says white on white can help create a “wow” statement. Along with new trends remain holiday staples, including traditional color schemes featuring reds, greens, burgundies, white, gold, silver and bronze. McKinnis says metallic accents add a festive sparkle. “A good silver candelabra with ivory candlesticks is never going to go out of style,” adds Beussink. Classic patterns also can add a traditional element. “Classic tartan plaid tablecloths are timeless beauties,” Beussink says. “They’ll give your space that Ralph Lauren look.” To add a personal touch, McKinnis recommends using family heirlooms to pull a table together. Candles are a must, she says, and adding a touch of artificial light can warm up a table without creating a fire hazard. “A huge trend now and something that we carry here at our store are the flickering flame candles,” Beussink says. When setting up for a meal, McKinnis encourages adding variance to the presentation. “Set a beautiful buffet to serve for your guests,” she says. “Be sure to alternate and use various heights to create an interesting look to your serving or buffet table.” For centerpieces, McKinnis says an affordable option is to fill a decorative bowl with pine cones, ornaments or another component and use LED battery-operated lights to brighten it up. “Fresh cranberries can make a nice accent as well,” she says. “Find various heights of vases or glassware. Place a candle in the center, then surround it with berries.“ Further ideas from McKinnis include a combination of birch, natural pine cones, fresh greens, berries, antlers, twine and wooden boxes filled with fresh juniper or boxwood. “Apothecary jars on a beautiful tray make a very pretty statement,” she adds. “Fill them with ornaments or pine cones and added LED lights. They’ll add a pretty sparkle to your table and décor.” Dodie Eisenhauer of Village Designs in Daisy says it’s good to have a focal point in a centerpiece. “It just is a happy thing to have, something of beauty sitting in the middle of your table [to] get that festive look,” she says. She and her daughter create various sizes of steel, copper and brass wire balls, wreaths, angels and Christmas trees that can help create a unique look for the holiday season. “With our wire balls you can be your own creative person; you can add your own arrangements, too,” Eisenhauer says. “You can stick candy canes in it, [there are] all kinds of different opportunities to be creative.” Along with a stunning centerpiece, McKinnis recommends incorporating china, crystal and festive linens to create an unforgettable holiday dinner. Coordinating ribbons are another component that can add flair to a centerpiece. “Don’t skimp on quality ribbon, and be sure the ribbon ends and your bows are cut neatly and diagonally or in a French cut,” McKContinued on next page

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‘tis the season / holiday décor Continued from page 49

A FESTIVE FEATURE

LAURA SIMON ~ lsimon@semissourian.com

Holiday decor is on display in the home of Linda McKinnis, owner of Design Exclusive.

innis says. When in doubt, McKinnis says to contact a professional designer or look to Pinterest or design blogs for further inspiration. In terms of trends that are waning, McKinnis says Old World concepts and country Christmas themes seem to have taken a back seat. She also suggests decorating other rooms to coordinate with the chosen motif. “During the holidays, I add wreaths and trees to almost every room in my house, and don’t forget to decorate your mirrors, too. Slipcovers over dining room chairs are a nice option as well,” she says. “Decorate your fireplace mantels to coordinate with your tree and tables. I also like to match my wrapping papers to the theme of my Christmas. The perfect design will incorporate each and every detail.” Above all else, Beussink says the table decorations should reflect the host’s personal style. “Make it feel like it’s your home — enjoy it, make it comfortable, make it something that you’re proud of that you can relax in that feels like you,” Beussink says. “Make it quirky, make it romantic, make it beautiful, but make it you.”

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‘tis the season / books

BEN MATTHEWS ~ photos@semissourian.com

Sarah Geringer poses for a photo at her Jackson home.

AT PEACE WITH THE SEASON

Sarah Geringer’s new book of devotionals encourages women to ‘focus on peace, not perfection’ By Lindsay Jones

As a working mother of three busy children, Sarah Geringer of Jackson knows what it means to make sure her family’s needs are met each day. By extension, she also knows just how much more taxing the process can be during the winter holiday season, when wrapping gifts, cooking lavish meals and attending holiday events are added to an already hectic mix. That, more than anything, is why Geringer decided to write an e-book titled “Christmas Peace for Busy Moms.” In it, she leads readers

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through a series of devotionals to help them cope with the many demands on their time. The book is available on her website, sarahgeringer. com. This is what the budding author had to say about the book and her hopes for the future. Flourish: Why did you decide to write the book? Geringer: I love Bible studies, and when I became a mom, I joined the Bible study at my church. I met other women there who could mentor me and help me build up my faith.

Sarah Geringer wrote an e-book titled “Christmas Peace for Busy Moms.” In it, she leads readers through a series of devotionals to help them cope with the many demands on their time. (Submitted photo)

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Flourish: Tell me about yourself — what led you to becoming an author? Geringer: I’ve always loved art and writing and anything creative. People have said I have good insight, and when I was leading Bible studies, I felt like I could exercise my leadership skills and also learn about the issues that are important to women — what issues they struggle with and where they’re looking for guidance. Flourish: How long did it take to write “Christmas Peace”? Geringer: I got the idea this summer, and it took me a few weeks. I had to sacrifice a few weekends. The book is less than 100 pages. I wanted it to be that way because busy moms don’t have a lot of time to read every day. Each day’s reading should take less than 15 minutes and there are 25 days — 25 studies. Flourish: Why the holiday theme? Geringer: I feel like I spent many years as a mom trying to create a perfect Christmas for family, and I understood the pressure that that moms feel to be everything to their families. I thought it was time to focus on the peace we can find in the season, not just for ourselves, but for other people. Focus on peace, not perfection. Flourish: That sounds true of life in general … Geringer: This is a very Christmas season-focused book, but there are spiritual truths that can carry into other areas, such as creating order in everyday scenarios. (In the book) I talk about preparing your evening so you have a peaceful morning. I also talk about practical ways to bring peace to people in your circles, whether that’s your extended family or the marketplace or the workplace, because I believe we have a responsibility to share peace in this stressed-out, busy world.

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Flourish: Is this your first book? Geringer: I have written a memoir that’s currently under review with a small-press publisher in St. Louis. It’s called “Heart in a Drawer: My Story as a Child of Divorce.” Flourish: With your Christmas-season book, what’s in it for you? Geringer: I see myself starting a ministry, not necessarily for my own gain. I have a heart for helping other women. I’m going to have an online Bible study that ties in with the book. It will be on my blog at sarahgeringer.com, and that’s where readers will be able to interact, sharing tips and ideas and ways they are experiencing peace and sharing peace. Then, I have plans to write seven more e-books with online Bible studies in 2017. Flourish: What’s next after the e-books? Geringer: I think my dream is to write full time, speak at conferences and maybe publish in the traditional market, where I can reach a large (segment) of Christian women. I’m focused right now on building up my readership. Flourish: What do you like to do when you’re not writing? Geringer: I like to bake. I love sweets. I like to garden and I can’t live without reading at least two hours a day.

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‘tis the season / christmas tree By BrandPoint

Shiny silver and gold, the warm glow of lights, dazzling bursts of color — the Christmas tree helps fill our homes with laughter and love during the merriest of seasons. And while gathering together to trim the tree is a beloved family tradition for many of us, let’s be honest — for others, it’s an intimidating decorating nightmare. But don’t be overwhelmed — it’s easy to go from dazed to dazzling with a few insider tips.

TRIM THAT TREE

Dazzling decorating easy as 1-2-3

STEP 1: Find the tree that fits your lifestyle. Designer John Griffith decorates dozens of trees and leads holiday design seminars for Replacements Ltd. He recognizes since we all live in different spaces, the picture-perfect 7-foot tree won’t work for everyone. “People like myself who live in apartments, condos or smaller living areas often feel stuck having to get a tiny tree because of limited space, when there are so many more options,” Griffith says. “Flat trees, which are very low profile and sit close to the wall, are perfect for tight spaces. Half round trees are another great option because they’re basically half a tree, while corner trees reflect their name because they’re shaped to fit into corners. These types of artificial trees create the impact of having a larger tree that in reality doesn’t take up all that much room.” STEP 2: Light it up. Once you find the perfect tree, figure out how many lights you really need. Griffith suggests using at least 150 lights per foot of tree to decorate just the tips. For more depth, use at least 250 lights per foot. And consider LED lights. Griffith notes that while upgrading to LEDs may be expensive initially, they’re a good investment in that these lights burn much cooler, last longer and are more energy efficient. STEP 3: Think in thirds. One of Griffith’s best practices: decorate in thirds. “This is one of the easiest ways to make sure your tree is balanced from a decorating standpoint,” he says. “Start by looking at your tree as what it is — a huge cone — then section it off in thirds around the tree. For example, if you have 1,500 lights, use 500 for one section, 500 for the

Stock photo

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Continued on page 56

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timesaving / ‘tis the season

THE HOLIDAY HUSTLE

8 timesaving tips for the holidays By BrandPoint

The holidays are magical, but all that fun and festivity can eat up a lot of your time. Don’t let the joy of the season be overshadowed by a hectic schedule and too many to-do’s. These 10 simple tips and tricks will help you save time so you can focus on what really matters.

Host a decorating party. Decorating can be extremely time-consuming, but not as much when you have help. Invite friends and family over, turn on some festive tunes and deck the house to the nines. Everyone will be in a festive mood, and you’ll save numerous hours you’d otherwise spend decorating.

Take shortcuts. There’s no harm in taking shortcuts when necessary. Need holiday cookies for your next book club meeting? Swing by the bakery instead of making them yourself. Stick to your priorities and consider convenient shortcuts for the rest.

Plan backward. Set due dates for yourself and plan backward to ensure you get all steps completed on time. For example, if you want your holiday cards to arrive by Dec. 22, also mark dates for ordering cards, writing the insert and addressing envelopes to ensure you stay on track.

Limit lists. Kids make the holidays magical, but sometimes their gift lists can get out of control. This year, have kids focus on three main things: one item they want, one item they need and one gift for the entire family. You’ll save time knowing what they truly want, and kids will learn to prioritize their desires.

Shop early. Whether you need gifts for all your loved ones or you’re stocking up on groceries for special dinners, shop ahead of time to reduce stress. Shopping ahead means you won’t get stuck in long, last-minute lines and instead can go home to relax with family.

Wrap as you go. Whether you love or loathe wrapping gifts, if you do it all at once, you’ll be up half the night. Instead, if you wrap gifts as you buy them, you spread out the work, plus you get to display those gifts to keep loved ones guessing as to what awaits them in the future.

Pack light. Heading out of town to celebrate this year? Opt for gift cards to streamline your shopping and lessen your load. If you must bring wrapped gifts, try shipping them to the destination ahead of time.

Secret Santa. Instead of shopping for every family member or co-worker, propose drawing names and conducting a Secret Santa exchange. That means you buy and receive one gift and don’t know who it’s from until the day it’s unwrapped. Bonus: You save money. Stock photo

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Continued from page 54

TRIM THAT TREE

middle and 500 for the last section. Do the same thing with your ornaments by dividing them into three groups before you start arranging those on the tree.” Next, stylize with ornaments. While lights create seasonal glow, ornaments dazzle and delight, bringing out the child in all of us. Our choice of ornaments reflect more than individual style and taste — they’re distinctively sentimental. “Annual ornaments are always popular from a nostalgic standpoint because of the special memories connected to each one,” says collectibles specialist Kristen Pulley. “For instance, those made by Lenox China are very dear to me because of my two daughters. I started a collection for each of them when they were born — I began the teddy bear series for one and the gingerbread man for the other. ... It’s become part of our family tradition.” Blown glass ornaments also have kept their popularity, she adds. “Production costs have gotten less expensive without compromising the quality making these

more affordable to collect,” she explains. What’s hot for 2016? Griffith says one of this year’s big decorating trends centers on monochromatic, such as using the same color lights (regardless of the hue), with ornaments in either all silver or all gold, but not both. “One of my favorite techniques is adding bullion to a tree,” he says. “Bullion is a very thin wire you add on the outside tips in geometric shapes that gives the tree a different kind of texture, movement and depth. It really adds richness to the tree, and the way the light reflects off this wire looks very luxe.” Finally, Griffith notes no tree is complete without an over-the-top tree topper. Really nice bows made from high-quality ribbon look lovely, while he favors using feathers, branches, floral stems and other natural elements to put an exclamation point on the top of the tree. With these great tips, it should be easy to find your own flair to kick off what’s sure to be a memorable holiday entertaining season.

“

One of my favorite techniques is adding bullion to a tree,” he says. “Bullion is a very thin wire you add on the outside tips in geometric shapes that gives the tree a different kind of texture, movement and depth. It really adds richness to the tree, and the way the light reflects off this wire looks very luxe.

”

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kitchen / ‘tis the season This photo shows a delicious solution for a dry cake. Whatever the kitchen disaster, there’s usually an easy fix available. MATTHEW MEAD ~ Associated Press

HOLIDAY KITCHEN DISASTER?

We’ve got a fix for that! www.semissourian.com/flourish

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‘tis the season / kitchen

This photo shows a delicious solution for a dry cake.

By SARA MOULTON

Associated Press If you’re planning to entertain at home this holiday season, you’d be wise to bear in mind the words of Julia Child: “Never apologize. Never explain.” Because something is going to go wrong. Something always does. But that doesn’t mean you need to tell the world. Her philosophy was simple: Embrace the disaster, do what you can to fix it, but tell nobody. Just serve it as is and chances are good no one will notice or care. Did your souffle fall? Call it a pudding cake instead. Are your cookies overcooked? Crumble them over ice cream. Which is to say, there’s almost no kitchen mistake that can’t be fixed so long as you stay calm and keep an open mind. In fact, as far as I know there are only two things that are unfixable. We’ll come back to those, but in the meantime, let’s talk about some of the most common holiday cooking problems and the best ways to fix them. THE TURKEY ISN’T DONE So your guests arrived two hours ago, but the turkey has barely broken 125 degrees. Now what? Maybe it’s time to check the movie listings? Just kidding. Sort of. This is a hard fix, but it’s not im-

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MATTHEW MEAD ~ Associated Press

In the meantime, if you are so inclined, distract your guests with an easy snack and cocktail. Plan ahead and stash some bacon and wheat crackers, as well as apple cider, bourbon and oranges. Quickly wrap half a slice of bacon around each cracker, sprinkle with pepper, then arrange on a baking sheet and bake (whatever temperature the oven is already at is fine) until the bacon is just barely crisp. For the drink, spike cider with bourbon and an orMATTHEW MEAD ~ Associated Press ange slice. Nobody will notice the delay. This photo shows overcooked Brussels sprouts. How to avoid this next time? Plan better. For Whatever the kitchen disaster, there’s usually an example, if it is recommended that you roast your easy fix available. 16-pound turkey at 325 degrees for 3 1/2 to 4 1/2 hours, but assume it’ll take the longer estimate. possible. Start by making sure you’re getting an Even so, start checking the internal temperature on accurate read on the turkey’s temperature. Use an the early side, after about 3 hours. If the turkey’s instant thermometer inserted at the leg/thigh joint, not done, keep checking at 30-minute increments and make sure the probe doesn’t hit bone. until it registers about 160 degrees. (Remember, the Next, pull the bird from the oven and increase temperature will continue to rise to the needed 165 the temperature by 50 degrees. Cover the turkey degrees while the bird rests). with foil, then return it to the oven. Check the temperature every 30 minutes, but no more than that. THE TURKEY IS DONE TOO SOON More frequent opening of the oven lets the heat If your turkey gets to 160 degrees and your guests escape, further slowing the cooking. Once you are have not arrived yet, don’t fret. The turkey needs to within striking range of your target temperature rest, covered loosely with foil, for at least 20 minutes (155 to 160 degrees), remove the foil to allow for before carving. And it will stay rip-roaring hot for browning (unless the bird already was sufficiently up to an hour. golden).

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THE TURKEY IS DRY Turkey tends to be flavorless enough as it is, never mind when it is overcooked and dried out. To fix a dry bird, heat the oven to 300 degrees. Carve the meat off the bird, slicing it as you would to serve. Arrange the slices, slightly overlapping, in a shallow baking pan, then pour some turkey or chicken broth over them, enough to come halfway up the sides of the slices of turkey. Cover the pan tightly with foil and heat the turkey for 10 minutes, or until it’s heated through. Now lift out the slices and arrange on a serving platter. Ladle gravy over the slices. It will be a beautiful presentation and the meat will be deliciously moist. THE TURKEY ISN’T CARVING NICELY Sometimes when you carve the bird, much of the breast meat remains on the bone. There is a reason this happens; it’s the wishbone, which blocks the knife from slicing all the way down to the rib cage. So get the wishbone out of there, then get back to carving. And the best way to carve is to start by cutting the whole breast off the carcass, removing one half-breast at a time. Then do your slicing. Also, unless you’re a professional chef or a surgeon, I suggest carving the bird in the kitchen (where there are no spectators). THE BEEF OR PORK IS OVERCOOKED (OR COLD) This one is easy. Start by heating some of whatever gravy you have on hand. If it appears there might not be enough, stretch it by adding a little beef or chicken broth (or, in a pinch, water). Slice the meat thin, arrange it in overlapping slices on the serving plates (do all of this out of view in the kitchen), then pour a liberal helping of hot gravy on every serving. THE SAUCE LOOKS GREASY This is because the fat and other liquids are starting to separate. Just return the sauce to the pot over low heat and whisk in a little water. It should become emulsified and smooth again in no time. THE GRAVY IS LUMPY Pour the gravy through a mesh strainer and discard the lumps. Alternatively, portion the gravy into a blender in batches and puree until smooth. But when working with hot liquids, never fill a blender more than a third full. THE MASHED POTATOES ARE LUMPY Leave them be and call them “rustic” or “smashed” potatoes. Continuing to mash the potatoes will risk overworking them and can make them gluey. (See the dire warning about gluey po-

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tatoes below.) THE GREEN VEGETABLES ARE OVERCOOKED Pop the vegetables into the food processor and pulse until they are finely chopped. Now mix them into the mashed potatoes, rebranding the dish as “Brussels sprouts potato mash.” And by the way, that example is particularly delicious if you happened to toss some bacon in with the overcooked Brussels sprouts. Or, if the meal could use a first course, turn the veggies into a soup. In a blender, combine the overcooked vegetables with some milk, broth or water, a little garlic and some cheese, then puree until smooth. You also could stir in a spoonful or two of mashed potatoes for thickening, then garnish the soup with toasted seeds or nuts. You’re a genius. THE PIE FALLS APART OR THE CRUST CRUMBLES Spoon it into wineglasses in alternating layers with a bit of ice cream or whipped cream and call it a pie trifle. THE WHIPPED CREAM IS OVER-WHIPPED If the whipped cream starts to look dry and grainy, just add a little more cream and carefully beat it until soft peaks form. Then stop. You’re done. Alternatively, assuming you have enough heavy cream to make a second batch, keep beating the first batch until the cream completely breaks and forms butter (and liquid, the buttermilk). Drain off the buttermilk (save it for pancakes the next morning) and season the butter with salt. Serve it with the dinner rolls. It will be the best butter you’ve ever eaten. THE CAKE IS DRY Make a simple syrup by combining equal parts sugar and water and heating them in a saucepan over low heat until the sugar is dissolved. If you want to flavor the syrup, add vanilla, lemon zest or juice, orange zest or juice, brandy or another liqueur. Brush the syrup liberally over the layers of the cake before assembling. Or slice the cake and drizzle the syrup over each serving. Or you can make a quick raspberry or strawberry sauce by combining some frozen (thawed) berries with a little sugar in a blender. Puree it all, then strain the puree to remove the seeds. Pour the sauce over the cake slices, top each portion with ice cream and call it cake a la mode. THE CAKE/CHEESECAKE/PUMPKIN PIE IS CRACKED You can camouflage the cracks by decorating the

top of the dessert with lightly sweetened whipped cream (preferably piped on using a decorative tip) or by dusting it with powdered sugar shaken from a mesh strainer. And if you want to get fancy, pick up a paper doily ahead of time. Place the doily over the cake and dust with powdered sugar over that. Beautiful! Either quick fix should be done at the last minute because the whipped cream eventually can get watery and the powdered sugar will weep if it sits for too long on top of the cake. THE ROLLS BURNED ON THE BOTTOM Perform a taste test. Using a serrated knife, slice the bottom off one of the rolls, then taste what’s left. If it tastes burned, toss them. If it tastes fine, slice the bottoms off all of the rolls, arrange them in a single layer in a basket, bottoms up, and spread softened butter on the cut sides. Serve them hot and call them hot buttered rolls. THE UNFIXABLE TWO There are really only two kitchen errors that can’t be easily repaired. If something is burned — and I don’t mean just singed or browned on the bottom — it’s going to taste bad pretty much no matter what you do to it. You could try telling your guests you smoked it, but the chances are they’ll know the terrible truth. Your only real choice is to toss it out and serve more of the dishes that weren’t burned. Or order out for pizza. That said, a slightly burned turkey sometimes can be saved. If it’s mostly the skin that took the heat, carve the bird (in the kitchen!), discard the skin, then use the broth technique described above to bring back some moisture. But if the meat itself is burned... Well, everyone loves the sides most, anyway. The second mistake that can’t be undone: overmixed, gluey mashed potatoes. I made this mistake many years ago and I’ve never forgotten it. It was Thanksgiving and I’d just begun attending cooking school. I volunteered to cook the whole big meal myself at my sister’s house. She didn’t own a potato ricer, food mill or even a plain old potato masher. So when it was time to puree my potatoes, I reached for the food processor ... and ended up with wallpaper glue. If this happens to you, please understand that the potatoes are dead and you’ll need to cook up something else to absorb the gravy. If you have enough potatoes, just cook up another batch. And if time is running tight, cut the potatoes in 1/2-inch pieces before boiling them; they’ll be done much faster. Alternatively, grab a box of pasta (preferably orzo or macaroni), boil it up, toss it with butter and Parmesan and brightly inform your guests that you just felt like going Italian this holiday.

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Q &the ‘tis A /season style & beauty

HOLIDAY HAPPENINGS Editor’s note: This is a partial list of holiday events available at press time. To search for or add a holiday event, go to www.semoevents.com. 25TH ANNUAL PARADE OF LIGHTS 5 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 27, downtown Cape Girardeau The parade begins at 5 p.m. or as soon as dusk arrives. The route starts at Capaha Park, proceeds down Broadway, turns right on Main Street and ends at Merriwether Street. This year’s theme is “25 Years of Christmas Lights on Parade.” Old Town Cape presents the event. CHARLESTON CHRISTMAS PARADE 6 p.m. Friday, Dec. 2, Main Street, Charleston, Missouri The theme will be “Spreading the Spirit of Christmas,” and there will be activities at the Mississippi County Historical Society and local shops. DOWNTOWN CHRISTMAS OPEN HOUSE 5 to 9 p.m. Friday, Dec. 2, downtown Cape Girardeau Old Town Cape presents a night of Christmas fun. There will be carolers and sleigh rides, sweet treats and holiday specials, and a host of festive cheer to help ring in the Christmas season. Bring your family and friends to experience the excitement of the annual Downtown Christmas Open House. LFCS HOLIDAY HOME TOUR 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 3 See how other folks decorate for the holidays with the Lutheran Family and Children’s Services Holiday Home Tour. The houses featured on the tour range from historic to new construction, but they’re all decked out for Christmas. Tickets are $25 in advance or $30 the day of the tour. Tickets are available at Bank of Missouri locations in Cape Girardeau, Jackson,

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Perryville and Marble Hill, Missouri; Patrick Furniture; Southeast Hospital gift shop; Sunny Hill Garden Center and the LFCS office. Call (573) 334-5866 for more information. There will be a refreshment stop at the Marquette Tower in downtown Cape Girardeau. CHAFFEE CHRISTMAS PARADE 1 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 3, Chaffee Head Start, Chaffee, Missouri The parade begins at the Head Start parking lot on North Main Street and ends at the Chaffee High School parking lot. The theme is “It’s a Disney Christmas.” There will be hot dogs and hot chocolate after the parade. Contact H.B. Rice at (573) 887-3555 if you are interested in participating. JACKSON LIGHTED CHRISTMAS PARADE 5 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 3, uptown Jackson The theme for this year’s parade is “Storybook Christmas.” Santa Claus will arrive on the last float and will be at the gazebo at courthouse square after the parade. The pajama fun run will be held before the parade, and there will be carolers walking up and down the parade route before and during the parade. Christmas stories and hot chocolate will be available in the Cape Girardeau County History Center. SCOTT CITY LIGHTED CHRISTMAS PARADE 5 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 3, Scott City “Polar Express” is the theme for this year’s Scott City Park and Scott City Fire Department parade. The parade will begin at the Bob’s Foodliner parking lot and end at the city park, where refreshments will be served by the fire department. The Scott City Elementary Honor Choir will be on stage singing Christmas carols. After the choir, Santa Claus will come to visit with the children. Awards will be given to the first-, second- and third-place floats. To enter a float, call (573) 264-2322.

IMMACULATE CONCEPTION CHURCH MUSIC MINISTRY CHRISTMAS CONCERT 2:30 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 4, Immaculate Conception Catholic Church in Jackson The church’s Advent/Christmas concert features the adult choir, choristers and the Bells of Joy Ringers. Special guests will be the Heartland Pops Chorus. 15TH ANNUAL HAPPY SLAPOWITZ TOY BASH 6 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 8, various locations in downtown Cape Girardeau The Happy Slapowitz Toy Bash is the largest local toy drive for the U.S. Marine Corps Toys for Tots program. This year’s event features several bands at various venues. Also, Smokin’ Brothers will be on hand with barbecue. For more details, visit facebook.com/happyslapowitz. SOUTHERN COUNTRY CHURCH TOUR OF CAPE GIRARDEAU COUNTY 4 to 8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 10, and 1 to 4 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 11 Take a Christmas tour of Christ Lutheran Church in Gordonville; Zion United Methodist Church in Gordonville; Whitewater United Methodist Church in Whitewater; St. James United Church of Christ in Tilsit; and Immanuel Lutheran Church in Tilsit. CHRISTMAS COUNTRY CHURCH TOUR 3 to 9 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 15 and Friday, Dec. 16 More than 20 churches in Cape Girardeau, Perry and Bollinger counties will deck their halls and invite visitors inside for Christmas music and refreshments. Churches can be toured in any order. For a list of churches, visit www.facebook. com/christmascountrychurchtour. JUST FOR KIDS

Call the Cape Girardeau Parks and Recreation Department to register for these events just for

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kids — the number is (573) 339-6340. COOKIES FOR SANTA 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 6, Osage Centre Kids ages 4 to 7 will make Christmas cookies for Santa while listening to the classic tale of “The Night Before Christmas.” Register by Dec. 2; the cost is $10 for Cape Girardeau residents and $11 for nonresidents. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 7, Osage Centre Kids ages 5 to 12 will make Christmas cards for those in nursing homes and senior centers throughout Cape Girardeau. Register by Dec. 2; the cost is $2 for Cape Girardeau residents and $3 for nonresidents. BREAKFAST WITH SANTA 8:30 to 10:30 a.m. Saturday, Dec. 10, Osage Centre Santa is making a special stop for breakfast in Cape Girardeau. Parents and kids are invited to visit with Santa and enjoy a yummy breakfast. If preregistered, the cost is $5 per child, $5 per adult, $8 for two children or $11 for three children. The cost is $8 per person the day of the event.

• Plowshares Sale 8 a.m. to 1 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 10 Abbey Road Christian Church, Cape Girardeau • Crafts, Gifts and Collectibles Show 5 to 9 p.m. Friday, Nov. 18; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. Nov. 19; 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Nov. 20 Notre Dame Regional High School Admission: $1 on Friday and Saturday; free on Sunday • Christmas Arts and Crafts Extravaganza 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 19; 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 20 Osage Centre and the Show Me Center Admission: $5 Saturday (good for both days and both locations), $3 Sunday (good for both locations). • River Valley Craft Fair 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 19; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 20 Arena Building, 4-H Building at Arena Park Admission: $5 Saturday, $3 Sunday

FLASHLIGHT CANDY CANE HUNT 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 16, Arena Building Bring your flashlights and help find the hidden candy canes. When you arrive, you get to decorate a bag to collect the candy canes. After the candy canes are collected, there will be cookies and hot chocolate, and children can make a Christmas list for Santa. A parent must accompany children. Please dress according to weather. The cost is $3 if preregistered and $5 on the day of the event. CRAFT FAIRS

Get a head start on your holiday shopping, and find some one-of-a-kind items, at local arts and craft shows:

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File photos: Laura Simon and Glenn Landberg

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easier to line pans, cover birds browning too quickly and wrap leftovers.

HOLIDAY EQUATIONS with a bit of water until dissolved. This mixture then is diluted with additional cold water (volume will vary depending on the size of your bird) and ice. Be certain the brine is completely cooled before using it. Turkeys should be brined for at least 8 to 10 hours, but can go as long as 72 hours. A good rule of thumb is, the longer the brine, the weaker the brine. So for a 10-hour soak, use 1 cup each of salt and sugar. For a longer one, consider backing down to 3/4 cup each. Always keep the bird refrigerated during brining. If the turkey is too big, an ice-filled cooler stored outside works, too. Don’t have the time or patience to brine? Try salting instead. In fact, plenty of folks say salting a turkey produces meat with far better flavor than brining. To do it, set the turkey on a platter, then rub a generous amount of kosher salt on all surfaces. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight. When you’re ready to roast, rinse the salt from the turkey, pat it dry and pop it in the oven. THE ROAST Roasting temperatures vary widely by recipe. Some go at a slow and steady 325 degrees. Others crank the heat to 400 or 425 degrees for the first hour, then drop it down for the rest of the time. However you roast, use an instant thermometer inserted at the innermost part of the thigh (without touching bone) to determine when your turkey is done. The meat needs to hit 165 degrees for safe eating, though some people say thigh meat tastes better at 170 degrees. If the outside of the bird gets too dark before the center reaches the proper temperature, cover it with foil. The following roasting time estimates are based on a stuffed turkey cooked at 325 degrees. Reduce cooking time by 20 to 40 minutes for turkeys that are not stuffed (estimate total roasting times at 15 minutes per pound for unstuffed birds). And remember, a crowded oven cooks more slowly, so plan ahead if your bird needs to share the space. Using a convection oven? They are great at browning, but require heating or timing adjustments. Either cut the temperature by about 25 degrees from what is called for by the recipe and cook for the time directed, or roast at the suggested temperature, but reduce the cooking time by about 25 percent.

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Stock photo

The following times are for a standard oven: • 12-pound turkey: 3 to 4 hours at 325 degrees • 15-pound turkey: 4 to 4 1/2 hours at 325 degrees • 18-pound turkey: 4 1/2 to 5 hours at 325 degrees • 20-pound turkey: 5 to 6 hours at 325 degrees THE BASTE Basting the bird with its juices helps crisp the skin and flavor the meat. Do it every 30 minutes, but no more. Opening the oven door too frequently lets heat escape and can significantly slow the cooking. THE REST The turkey never should go directly from the oven to the table. Like most meat, it needs to rest before serving for the juices to redistribute. Cover the turkey with foil and a few bath towels layered over that (to keep it warm), then let it rest for 20 to 30 minutes before carving. THE GEAR You don’t need to drop a load of cash on special equipment to be thankful this Thanksgiving, but there are some tools that make life easier (and the food safer). A digital instant thermometer or wired probe (that remains in the turkey during roasting) is the most critical. Cheap thermometers will set you back no more than $20. A heavy-duty roasting pan is a worthwhile investment, but only if you make gravy from the drippings (the pan can be set on the stovetop after roasting) and if you roast other critters during the rest of the year. Otherwise, do yourself a favor and spend a few bucks on a disposable foil roasting pan (get a sturdy one). This makes cleanup a whole lot easier. Speaking of foil, get the good stuff. Skip the wimpy 12-inch rolls and grab the heavy-duty 18inch stuff. It costs a few dollars more, but makes it

THE SIDES • Carrots: a 1-pound bag makes 4 to 5 servings • Cranberry sauce: a 12-ounce package of fresh cranberries makes about 2 1/4 cups of sauce; a 16-ounce can has 6 servings • Gravy: plan for 1/3 cup of gravy per person • Green beans: 1 1/2 pounds of beans makes 6 to 8 servings • Mashed potatoes: a 5-pound bag of potatoes makes 10 servings • Stuffing: a 14-ounce bag of stuffing makes about 11 servings DOUBLE OVEN TROUBLE? Are you lucky enough to be blessed with two ovens? Your Thanksgiving prep just got easier. Here’s how to make the most of the extra roasting space. – Dedicate one oven (if one is larger, use the larger) to the turkey. Place one rack on the oven’s lowest shelf and remove all others. When the bird goes in the oven, it goes on that bottom rack. Now see if you have room to add another rack over it. If so, this is the ideal place to cook your stuffing (assuming it isn’t in the bird), au gratin potatoes and green bean casseroles, which can cook at the same temperature at the bird. – Early in the day, use the second oven to cook anything that can be done ahead. Pies and rolls are good. Closer to the time you will serve the meal, use the second oven to cook things that need a higher temperature than the turkey, such as roasted root vegetables and pies. As the turkey is being carved, use both ovens to reheat items (such as those rolls) or keep things warm; 150 to 200 degrees is about right for both tasks. THE DESSERTS • Pie: a 9-inch pie can be cut into 8 modest slices. • Whipped cream: Dolloping whipped cream on those 8 modest slices will require 1 cup of heavy cream beaten with 2 tablespoons powdered sugar (a splash of vanilla extract is nice, too) • Ice cream: a la mode doesn’t require much – 1 pint per pie should suffice THE LEFTOVERS For food safety reasons, leftovers should be cleared from the table and refrigerated within two hours of being served. Once refrigerated, they should be consumed within three to four days. Leftovers can be frozen for three to four months. Though safe to consume after four months, they will start to taste off.

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