APRIL - JUNE 2025
In Loving Memory TRIBUTES TO OUR LOVED ONES
Helping children triumph over grief
C
hildren are amazingly perceptive. They sense when adults around them are stressed, sad or keeping a secret. While you may beinclined to shield children from grief, this can actually lead to confusion and anger. Wherever possible, children should be prepared for the passing of a loved one. In the event of a terminal illness, children should beprepared for the passing just as an adult would be. Death should be approached openly and honestly. Remember that children are accustomed to adults providing solutions and will have difficulty understanding why their loved one can’t be made well again. Explaining the process of death, perhaps with the assistance of suitable books, is a healthier approach than denying the tragedy. Although naturally resilient, it should not be assumed that children will be unaffected by death. They may experience any or all of the following:
Anger
Children, like adults, may feel rage at the deceased person, other relatives or themselves. They may even resent acquaintances who have not had to suffer through the anguish of losing a loved one.
Fear
Whenever a loss occurs, people affected are reminded that they, too, will die. It is no different in children, although it may be their first time realizing the permanence of death. They may fear their own death, or the death of others. If the deceased person was a parent, they may begin to fear that other caregivers will pass away too.
Sadness
Children experience deep sadness and even depression. They may not have experienced this level of pain before, making their feelings unrecognizable to them. Grief also manifests in physical
symptoms such as stomach pain, headaches and fatigue.
child will view the body, they should be carefully briefed as to what to expect.
Confusion
Grasping the concept of death
Children may not understand where the deceased person has gone and why, especially if they are too young to understand the concept of death. They may also have trouble adjusting to life without the person who has passed away, especially if that person was part of their day-to-day.
Guilt
Guilt is a natural part of grief. Children may worry that something they did or said caused the death. They could also regret not spending more time with the deceased before they passed away.
Level of involvement
Older children should be allowed to choose their level of involvement with regards to attending the funeral. They may want to write a poem, say a few words, lay a rose on the coff in, scatter ashes or wear a favorite outfit. This should be allowed wherever possible, even if it is not in keeping with the ideals of the funeral service. Viewing of the body should be a personal decision and is probably not suited to younger children. It may be best if the loved one is remembered as when they were alive. If it is decided that the
Caregivers should take care to avoid talking about death as if it is “like sleeping” or “going to sleep” because this can make a young child fearful of going to bed at night. They may believe that they will not wake again in the morning. Euphemisms such as this ultimately do more harm than good. It can be stressful for guardians to cope with young children at such a solemn time. If children are attending the funeral, it is important that they are made aware of the process and what is expected of them. It should also be explained that there will be many sad people inattendance. Observing grieving adults can have a profound effect: children may be reluctant to see those people again at a later stage. Itis important to explain that although people are sad now, they won’t always be unhappy.
Letting them grieve, their way
If it is decided that children should not attend the funeral, encourage them to say goodbye in their own way, perhaps by planting aspecial tree in the garden or letting go of a balloon covered with messages and drawings. For a close relationship, creating a special, private place where the child can go to remember the person who died can provide enduring
opportunities for peace. Involve older children in decisions surrounding the death of a close friend or relative. They may want a special keepsake and should not be overlooked when belongings are being given away. Keeping to familiar routine, especially for younger children, can be helpful but care should be taken not to push children into situations until they are ready. Allow older children suff icient time to grieve and avoid returning them to school too soon. Encourage the child to talk about their feelings. Older children may find internet support groups helpful but online activity should becarefully monitored at this vulnerable time. If those closest are unable to provide support due to their own grief, the child should becomforted by a close adult friend, perhaps a favorite aunt or uncle. Wherever applicable, the school counselor may be able to provide advice and indeed, the school should be kept informed so that allowances can be made for changes in behavior and grades. Understand that the child who has recently been confronted by death may regress for a short while – perhaps wanting a childhood toy or adopting attention-seeking behavior. Help children release their anger appropriately. One approach could be to encourage hitting cushions. Another could be to have the child write a letter, or draw a picture to describe their anger. This can then be torn up or burnt.
Taking care of physical health
Physical health is often forgotten or given a lower priority. However, ensuring their physical needs are attended to will provide them with a sense of safety and comfort. Ensure they have enough time to rest. Encourage children to eat and drink well. Exercise and playcan be the perfect way to release frustration, anger and anxiety. Above all, ensure that children understand that although this time is difficult to deal with and the loss will always be with them, the grief will pass. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory
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Mansur Abahusayn 1942-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Sharon Kay Aho 1946-2025 Anaheim, CA
Theodor C. Albert, Jr. 1953 - 2025 Orange, CA
Ernestina “Tina” Alduenda 1943-2025 Anaheim, CA
Dr. V.A. “Arj” Arjun 1939-2025 Rancho Mission Viejo, CA
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Richard ‘Dick’ Atnip 1937-2025 Fullerton, CA
Gen Ayers 1923-2025 Fullerton, CA
Roger Baker 1943-2025 Montclair, CA
Joan Bartoletti 1945-2025 Sunrise, FL
Evelyn Belgen 1929-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Leon E. Blakely Jr. 1934-2025 Jurupa Valley, CA
Kathy Boka 1943-2025 Capistrano Beach, CA
Charles Gray Borrego 1998-2025 Lake Forest, CA
Robert Lee Braun 1930-2025 Orange, CA
Ronald Breeden Sr. 1942-2025 Goldsby, OK
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Leah Taifer Brickner 2025 Tustin, CA
Edrie Kerr Brinker 1930-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Catharine Britton 1930-2025 Corona del Mar, CA
Guy Luther Brown 1929-2025 Elk Grove, CA
Philip Dean Brown 1940-2025 Lake Forest, CA
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Richard “Rick” Irvin Buhite 1944-2025 Grants, NM
Robert Bulman 1938-2025 Brea, CA
Walter Burke Jr. 1936-2025 Henderson, NV
Charlotte Cerruti 1942 - 2025 San Juan Capistrano, CA
Michael Robert Chase 1943-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
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Celia Joy Langford Christensen 1937-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Lorrie Bennett Collins 1931-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Alfred Corfield 1938-2025 Tustin, CA
Shirley Bess Costello 1934-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Allen Henry Court 1942-2025 Irvine, CA
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Brookley Jan Cross 1950-2025 La Quinta, CA
Suzann Mina Cummins 19352025 Costa Mesa, CA
Doren (Don) Allan Curtiss 1959-2025 Spring Hill, FL
John Denis Cushing 1932-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Mary Young Davis 1931-2025 Corona Del Mar, CA
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Anne Leonilla Delfosse 1957-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Reed Dickinson 1934-2025 Tustin, CA
Walter John Drazba, Jr. 1932-2025 Orange, CA
Lyn Drum 1933-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Paul Dylewski 1963-2025 Eden, UT
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John E. Dymond 1934-2025 Fullerton, CA
Gregory Jon Edwards 1957-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Yvonne Darleen Elston 1934-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Patricia M. English 1941-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Barbara Dee Erman 1934-2025 Placentia, CA
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Gayle Dean Erwin 1938-2025 Orange County, CA
Domenic Joseph Ferrante 1932-2025 Fullerton, CA
Joyce Feuerborn 1970-2025 Santa Ana, CA
Robert Fitzgerald 1944-2025 Denver, CO
Beverly Frannea 1943-2025 Davis, CA
How to Support a Friend Who Has Lost a Loved One
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t is never easy for someone who has lost a member of the family, even when it comes at the end of a long life or a prolonged illness. The loss is always deeply felt and followed by a period of grief. Considering this, how can you help support a friend who has suffered such a loss? Here are seven simple suggestions. 1. Be there for your friend
Expressing your support by being physically present with your friend is perhaps the single most appreciated action you can take. Because of the sensitive nature of the situation, many friends fail at this most basic task. Be sure to devote some time to spend with your friend in the days and weeks following the loss.
2. Don’t talk; listen
Your friend is likely experiencing a number of thoughts regarding the deceased, and you can be their sounding board. It is appropriatefor you to offer the occasional comment in order to share personal recollections, express sympathy, and provide encouragement, but most of the time you should just listen to what they have to say, and empathize with the feelings they share. Allow your friend to work through volatile emotions, freely express grief without fear of judgment, and tell you how the deceased had an impact on his or her life.
3. Provide childcare
If your friend has children, volunteer to take care of them for an afternoon or evening. Particularly if your friend has to make funeral arrangements to handle, your offer can allow them to focus on those responsibilities without the hassle of arranging for a babysitter.
you can help out. For instance, you can offer your home as a possible location. You could also help with preparations if the reception is to be held at another location. If sandwiches or sweets are desired, you could offer to prepare some. During the reception, you could assist as a host. Afterward, stick around to help clean up.
4. Drop off a meal
7. Check in
Prepare a home cooked meal and deliver it to your friend. There are enough things demanding their attention— preparing meals doesn’t have to be one of them. However, don’t pressure your friend to invite you to stay to share the meal. Rather than intruding on family time, simply drop the meal off and leave.
5. Show up for visitation and for the funeral
A day or two prior to many funerals, there are times designated for visitation. Often called a wake, this is an opportunity for people togather to view the body and to express their condolences to the family. Show up for at least a few minutes during one of these times,and then do your best to attend the funeral itself. If you are unable to attend the funeral in person, at least check in periodically over the phone or online.
6. Offer to help out with the reception
If your friend is responsible for organizing a reception following the funeral, volunteer your services. There are a variety of ways
Grief doesn’t simply end after the funeral. In fact, after the funeral is when the journey
through grief truly begins. Check in with your friend regularly after the death. Remember the anniversary of the loss and ask your friend how you can support them on this day. Offer your company, assistance and support through the months and years to come. Allow your friend to relax and show honest emotions. Losing a loved one can be an intensely stressful and exhausting experience. Your friend should not have to put on a brave face or attend to your needs. Give them the
space and freedom they need to process the loss, even if it extends well beyond the date of the funeral. By being sensitive to your friend’s mental and emotional state—and by taking some responsibilities upon yourself—you can help remove some of the weight from their shoulders. Your support in these ways will go a long way toward helping your friend through this time of loss. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
In Loving Memory
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Bill Freck 1944-2025 Villa Park, CA
Kevin E. Gallagher 1938-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Brenda K. Gardikis 1951-2025 Cypress, CA
Martha Estela Giannetti 1941-2025 Anaheim, CA
Esther Gorham 1932 - 2025 Santa Ana, CA
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Thomas M. Gray Jr. 1952-2025 Irvine, CA
Donald Elbert Green 1930-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Margaret Ann Greinke 2025 Villa Park, CA
Maria De Los Angeles Chavez Guerrero 1937-2025 Santa Ana, CA
Robert C. Hans 1933-2025 Lake Forest, CA
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Austin Harris 1976-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Lois Ann Hayden 1928-2025 Santa Ana, CA
John Glenn Hazen 1934-2025 Dana Point, CA
Holly Hertel Henderson 1935-2025 Portland, OR
Wouter Hes 1950-2025 Anaheim, CA
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Felicidad Medrano Hidalgo 1937-2025 Fullerton, CA
Terry Jean Hite 1942 - 2025 San Clemente, CA
Barry Garvin Hon 1938-2025 Dana Point, CA
Avalee Horn 1938-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Catherine Julia Huss 1938-2025 Chico, CA
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Douglas Johnston 1958-2025 Anaheim, CA
Jacqueline Judd 1931-2025 Huntington Beach , CA
Burton Karson 1934-2025 Irvine, CA
Jimmie Dale Kennedy 1933-2025 Anaheim, CA
Doran Suess Kough 1936-2025 Fullerton, CA
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Leone Kressin 1937-2025 San Juan Capistrano, CA
Yoshie Kyomen 1934-2025 Buena Park, CA
Tommie Jayne Lakatosh 1944-2025 Coto de Caza, CA
Kem Ryan Lawyer 1950 - 2024 Mission Viejo, CA
Agnes LeDuc 1927-2025 Chandler, AZ
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William Linas 1942-2025 Trabuco Canyon, CA
Sindy Alvarez Loya 1969-2025 Fullerton, CA
Maria S. Macias (Sanchez) 1937-2025 Orange, CA
Sergio A. Mandiola, M.D. 1933-2025 North Tustin, CA
Marilou Marchello 1956-2025 Las Vegas, NV
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Juan Armando (Avalos) Marrujo 1941-2025 Orange, CA
Milton and Carol McCoy 2025 Los Alamitos, CA
Bette “Tootie” Mayo McDonald 1923-2025 Lompoc, CA
John A. Michael 1929-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Maria Cristina Mohr 1928-2025 Anaheim, CA
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Rita (Rieka) D.C. Moorlach 1930-2025 Bartlett, TN
Chris Eugene Mumford 1955-2025 San Diego, CA
John P. Murphy Jr. 1948-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Jack Myers 1939-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
Kathleen Mary Nash 1944-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Mallory Jennifer Nicholson 1969-2025 Irvine, CA
Franklin Nishimoto 1933-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Robert Norris 1931-2025 Anaheim, CA
Dale Northey 2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Patricia Ann O’Donnell 1931-2025 Fullerton, CA
Steps to take when filing a will
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s with being born and having to pay taxes, we all face the prospect of our own death. If you plan on living to a ripe old age, it’s important to make things easier on those you leave behind by preparing a proper last will and testament. Benefits of creating a last will and testament
When you file a will, your final wishes are laid out in black and white, leaving no ambiguity about how you want your assets divided. By creating a will that is watertight, you can make your death less stressful for your survivors. You should also have peace of mind knowing your survivors will be taken care of when you are gone. Although it’s unsettling to think of your own death and the world without you in it, consider how you’d like your assets to be distributed once you are gone. Typically people contemplate how they’d like to leave their children, spouse, favorite charities and other loved onesin the event of their death.
When is a good time to start planning your final wishes?
Consider preparing a last will and testament once you’ve acquired assets or dependents. If you work full time, have a spouse orchildren, own a home, or have savings, it’s the right time to start planning.
Preparing the will
Don’t know how to get started? Follow these steps to begin planning your final wishes. 1. Account for all of your assets and debts Create a comprehensive list of everything you own or are entitled to. This includes, but is not limited to: • Real estate holdings • Life insurance policies
• Vehicles • Cars • Boats • Recreational vehicles • Financial investments • Owned businesses • 401(k) • RRSPs • Home equity • Stocks • Bonds • Pensions •O ther retirement savings and portfolios • Debts and liabilities 2. Assign a trustee A trustee, or executor, is the person who you assign to carry out the instructions held in your last will and testament. Their duties can include the distribution of assets, funeral planning, death announcement, services, cremation or care of your final remains, and distribution of your assets as set out in your will.
Ensure that the person you select to administer your estate is okay with being appointed as such before assigning them. The job of anexecutor or trustee is complex and stressful, usually taking months or years to conclude. Make sure they are up to the task. 3. List all beneficiaries Construct a list of relatives, friends and charities that you would like to remember in your will. This can include your spouse, children, siblings, parents and in-laws, charities you support, and any other people or organizations that you want to leave some of your accumulated wealth to. Write down the exact assets or percentage of the total estate that each person or organization will receive. 4. Final wishes for your bodily remains Perhaps you want to be interred in a tomb, with a simple grave, or extravagant headstone. Or maybe you
want your body to be cremated and your ashes scattered over your favorite lake, ski hill, ocean vista or other special place. Your wishes are yours alone, andcan be as personal as you like. Whatever they may be, ensure your requests are clearly identified in your will. 5. Make it legal Contact a lawyer that specializes in estate law. They know the current rules and regulations regarding wills, how they may affect your wishes, and the best ways to take care of those left behind. It’s better to be safe than sorry. There is no substitute for a legal will. Writing a letter or informal statement about how you’d like your assets divided might be a nice gesture to your survivors, but does not take the place of a will. Don’t risk your financial legacy being mismanaged. Don’t jeopardize the understanding of your final wishes. You can purchase a kit to create a will yourself. This will be less expensive than using a lawyer, but may not be as binding and watertightas you might like. If your will has complex instructions, it’s best to consult a lawyer.
Maintaining your wishes
Divorces, new marriages, new children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, favorite charities or new circumstances may raise the need to change your will, to either include new entries to your will, or have some taken out of it. After having your last will and testament written up, signed and witnessed, you will have to make changes to it as your life unfolds. Make it a habit to revisit your final wishes when life changes occur, or every few years. That way, you can rest assured loved ones will be taken care of when you are gone. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
In Loving Memory
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Patricia Dwyer O’Donnell 1938-2025 Newport Beach, CA
John E. Oliver 1945-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Mary Ann Olsen 1937-2025 Medford, OR
Stella Otsuka 1920 - 2025 Westminster, CA
David James Owens 1937-2025 Fullerton, CA
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Roger Pannier 2025 Kiehi, Maui HI
Diane Parker 1956-2025 Costa Mesa, CA
Kathryn Lynn Pearlman 1955-2025 Newport Coast, CA
Lanelle M. Phillips (Gates) and Kevin S. Phillips 1960-2025 Laughlin, NV
Patrick (Pat) Pirolo 1959-2025 Santa Ana, CA
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Gerritt “Gary” LeRoy Poelstra 1937-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Jean Poencet 1936-2025 Orange, CA
Charles “Chuck” Pohlhammer 1936-2025 Lake Forest, CA
Katsuko Pohorecki 1940-2025 Irvine, CA
Richard Michael Ramirez 1943 - 2025 Fullerton, CA
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Ronald Edward Restelli 1936-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Mary Ellen Eggleston Richardson 1960-2025 Inverness, FL
Johanna C. Richardson 1942-2025 Cerritos, CA
Dorothy “Dotty” Richman 1930-2025 Westminster, CA
Ann Richmond 1936-2025 Orange, CA
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Barbara Robinson 1949-2025 Fullerton, CA
Jerri Lee Rosen 1945-2025 Rancho Mission Viejo, CA
John Stephen Runyan 1938 - 2025 San Juan Capistrano, CA
Richard M. Rutledge 1942-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Elanne “Sue” Schultz 1928-2025 Temecula, CA
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Jolie Ann Seeley 1930-2025 Laguna Woods, CA
Arif Shakeel 1955-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Edmund Hill Shea III 1960-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Marilyn Ann Sickler 1936-2025 Laguna Woods, CA
William Simone 1951-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Steven Smart 1954-2025 Arroyo Grande, CA
Paul Richard Smith 1939-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Suleeta Ann Smith 1940-2025 Seal Beach, CA
Nicholas Solomon 1956-2024 Hemet, CA
Captain Randall Sorbel 1941-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
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Robert A. Spidell 1933 - 2025 San Clemente, CA
Kenneth A. Stark 1933-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
Edward Stephen Sternberger 1937-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Harry W. Stone 1940 - 2025 San Clemente, CA
Diane G. Surak 1954-2025 Lake Forest, CA
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Richard Stanley Swift 1939-2025 Buena Park, CA
Scott Michael Teissler 1953-2025 San Francisco, CA
Amelita Carlos Tiernan 1943-2025 Yorba Linda, CA
Sandra Hunter Tratar 1939-2025 Newport Beach, CA
Robert Lee Travis 1939-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Jeanette F. Troesken 1938-2025 Laguna Woods, CA
Kathleen Fay Tucknies (Thomas) 1950-2025 La Habra, CA
Mary Turner 1945-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Oliver William Vaughan 1934-2025 Mission Viejo, CA
Klea Lyn Walin 1942-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Joy Patricia Bunting Walt 1923-2024 San Clemente, CA
Gaye Lonna Wellbrock, “Grandy” 1945-2025 Carlsbad, CA
Wayne Eston Wells 1940-2025 New Braunfels, TX
Dr. Eva Wessell 1939-2025 Capistrano Beach, CA
Russell Steven Williams 1946-2025 Laguna Woods, CA
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Doris Irene Hill Winters 1932-2025 Fullerton, CA
Jeanne Wintheiser 1931-2025 Tustin, CA
Anne Margarete Woebken 1934-2025 North Tustin, CA
Claire Yourman 1928-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Zella Ann Zlaket 1931-2025 Garden Grove, CA
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Ann Zraick 1956-2025 Huntington Beach, CA
Paul Besser 1935-2024 Rancho Santa Margarita, CA
Frederick Lee Burrell 1950-2025 Orange. CA
Marty Calhoun 1930-2025 Balboa Island, CA
Sue Ellen Chanfield 1940-2024 Garden Grove, CA
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Prescott Edward Cogswell 1927-2025 San Clemente, CA
Carol Frazier 1960-2025 Anaheim Hills, CA
James W. “Jim” Hamilton 1934-2025 Stanton, CA
John Hornburg 1945-2025 Irvine, CA
Robert John Lammers 1950-2025 Stanton, CA
In Loving Memory
May the constant love of caring friends soften your sadness. May cherished memories bring you moments of comfort.
Donna Lee (Friend) Graf 1933-2025 Placentia, CA
May lasting peace surround your grieving heart.
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