APRIL - JUNE 2025
In Loving Memory TRIBUTES TO OUR LOVED ONES
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Helping children triumph over grief
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hildren are amazingly perceptive. They sense when adults around them are stressed, sad or keeping a secret. While you may beinclined to shield children from grief, this can actually lead to confusion and anger. Wherever possible, children should be prepared for the passing of a loved one. In the event of a terminal illness, children should beprepared for the passing just as an adult would be. Death should be approached openly and honestly. Remember that children are accustomed to adults providing solutions and will have difficulty understanding why their loved one can’t be made well again. Explaining the process of death, perhaps with the assistance of suitable books, is a healthier approach than denying the tragedy. Although naturally resilient, it should not be assumed that children will be unaffected by death. They may experience any or all of the following:
Anger
Children, like adults, may feel rage at the deceased person, other relatives or themselves. They may even resent acquaintances who have not had to suffer through the anguish of losing a loved one.
Fear
Whenever a loss occurs, people affected are reminded that they, too, will die. It is no different in children, although it may be their first time realizing the permanence of death. They may fear their own death, or the death of others. If the deceased person was a parent, they may begin to fear that other caregivers will pass away too.
Sadness
Children experience deep sadness and even depression. They may not have experienced this level of pain before, making their feelings unrecognizable to them. Grief also manifests in physical
symptoms such as stomach pain, headaches and fatigue.
child will view the body, they should be carefully briefed as to what to expect.
Confusion
Grasping the concept of death
Children may not understand where the deceased person has gone and why, especially if they are too young to understand the concept of death. They may also have trouble adjusting to life without the person who has passed away, especially if that person was part of their day-to-day.
Guilt
Guilt is a natural part of grief. Children may worry that something they did or said caused the death. They could also regret not spending more time with the deceased before they passed away.
Level of involvement
Older children should be allowed to choose their level of involvement with regards to attending the funeral. They may want to write a poem, say a few words, lay a rose on the coff in, scatter ashes or wear a favorite outfit. This should be allowed wherever possible, even if it is not in keeping with the ideals of the funeral service. Viewing of the body should be a personal decision and is probably not suited to younger children. It may be best if the loved one is remembered as when they were alive. If it is decided that the
Caregivers should take care to avoid talking about death as if it is “like sleeping” or “going to sleep” because this can make a young child fearful of going to bed at night. They may believe that they will not wake again in the morning. Euphemisms such as this ultimately do more harm than good. It can be stressful for guardians to cope with young children at such a solemn time. If children are attending the funeral, it is important that they are made aware of the process and what is expected of them. It should also be explained that there will be many sad people inattendance. Observing grieving adults can have a profound effect: children may be reluctant to see those people again at a later stage. Itis important to explain that although people are sad now, they won’t always be unhappy.
Letting them grieve, their way
If it is decided that children should not attend the funeral, encourage them to say goodbye in their own way, perhaps by planting aspecial tree in the garden or letting go of a balloon covered with messages and drawings. For a close relationship, creating a special, private place where the child can go to remember the person who died can provide enduring
opportunities for peace. Involve older children in decisions surrounding the death of a close friend or relative. They may want a special keepsake and should not be overlooked when belongings are being given away. Keeping to familiar routine, especially for younger children, can be helpful but care should be taken not to push children into situations until they are ready. Allow older children suff icient time to grieve and avoid returning them to school too soon. Encourage the child to talk about their feelings. Older children may find internet support groups helpful but online activity should becarefully monitored at this vulnerable time. If those closest are unable to provide support due to their own grief, the child should becomforted by a close adult friend, perhaps a favorite aunt or uncle. Wherever applicable, the school counselor may be able to provide advice and indeed, the school should be kept informed so that allowances can be made for changes in behavior and grades. Understand that the child who has recently been confronted by death may regress for a short while – perhaps wanting a childhood toy or adopting attention-seeking behavior. Help children release their anger appropriately. One approach could be to encourage hitting cushions. Another could be to have the child write a letter, or draw a picture to describe their anger. This can then be torn up or burnt.
Taking care of physical health
Physical health is often forgotten or given a lower priority. However, ensuring their physical needs are attended to will provide them with a sense of safety and comfort. Ensure they have enough time to rest. Encourage children to eat and drink well. Exercise and playcan be the perfect way to release frustration, anger and anxiety. Above all, ensure that children understand that although this time is difficult to deal with and the loss will always be with them, the grief will pass. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory
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In Loving Memory
Dr. Arden Leroy Albee 1928-2025 Pasadena, CA
Phyllis Ames 2025 Redding, CA
A Donald Anderle 1938-2025 Long Beach, CA
Aron Paul Andersen 1944-2025 Hamilton, MT
Kenneth Wayne Anderson 1961-2025 Altadena, CA
In Loving Memory
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George Arms 1936-2025 San Gabriel, CA
Fredric T. Arnesen 1935-2025 Chatsworth, CA
Richard “Dick” Ashnault 1937-2025 Northridge, CA
Raymond Anthony Augustine 1959-2025 San Diego, CA
Jessie A. Avalos 1932-2025 Fountain Valley, CA
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Cheryl “Cheri” Baskin 1953-2025 Temple City, CA
Anne Bauer 1938-2025 La Puente, CA
Joyce Josephine Eadie Bauman 1928 - 2024 Palos Verdes Estates, CA
Dorothy Bays 1930-2025 Long Beach, CA
Carlyn Patricia (Medak Dilorio) Belsky 1937-2025 San Pedro, CA
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Andrew Stirling Blair Jr. (Stirling) 1934-2025 Glendora, CA
Laurence Adams Bolton 1932-2025 Palos Verdes Estates, CA
Ofelia Teresa Bucy 1931-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
Betty Cristena Buda 1927-2025 San Pedro, CA
John Robert “Bob” Burman 1927-2025 Pasadena, CA
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Lawrence William Burnight 1938-2025 Long Beach, CA
Alice Mae Butcher 1936-2025 Long Beach, CA
Billie Elizabeth Cahill 1932-2025 San Pedro, CA
Marty Calhoun 1930-2025 Balboa Island, CA
Jeanine Corlyn Caligiuri 1929-2025 Lake View Terrace, CA
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Rev. Jesse Frank Chapman 1936-2025 Altadena, CA
Ann Elizabeth Clemo 1945-2025 Corvallis, OR
Marthe Cohn 1920-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Evelyn Connors 1936-2025 Long Beach, CA
Ted William Corwin 1946-2025 Palm Springs, CA
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Corita “Joan” (Watson) Costa 1936-2025 San Pedro, CA
Marcia Ann Cribbs 1935-2025 Torrance, CA
Bettie Ann Culleton 1935-2025 Alhambra, CA
Mary Catherine Cunningham 1932-2025 Long Beach, CA
Richard Darling 1942-2025 Long Beach, CA
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James F. Davenport, Jr. 1940-2025 Pasadena, CA
Joseph “Joe” Carl Dawidziak 1946-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
John Dean 1929 - 2025 Harbor City, CA
Vera Nancy Delgatto 1938-2025 San Gabriel, CA
Richard E. Dickerson 1931-2025 Pasadena, CA
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Marilyn K. Dickey 1932-2025 Monrovia, CA
Ronald Dierlam 1942-2025 Eagan, MN
Patricia Duran 1949-2025 San Gabriel Valley, CA
Pamela Duran 1948-2025 Long Beach, CA
Joyce Edelman 1929-2025 Reseda, CA
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Juliet Rivera Estrada 1940-2025 San Pedro, CA
Julie Fabry 1961-2025 Monrovia, CA
Elizabeth King Findley 1936-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
Judith Forbes 1945-2025 Long Beach, CA
Pierre Walter Fort 1956-2025 Los Angeles, CA
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Marion “Mimi” Scofield Frengs 1953-2025 Palos Verdes Estates, CA
Yasuko Irene Furuya 2025 Monterey Park, CA
Rumaldo “Macky” Garcia 1937-2025 San Dimas, CA
Rutger Gerritsen 1942-2025 Long Beach, CA
Karen Ann Gingras 1956 - 2025 Long Beach, CA
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Angelina Gioiello 1931-2025 San Pedro, CA
Joanna Giuliano 1943-2025 Rolling Hills Estates, CA
Russell G. Goetz 2025 Hayden, ID
Edna Phyllis Goodwin 1933-2025 Long Beach, CA
Alice Marie Gravett-Young 1939 - 2025 San Pedro, CA
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Jeanne Hopewell Green 1924-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Patricia Jane Griffin 1924-2025 Santa Rosa, CA
Catherine Hand 1941-2025 Gardena, CA
Argola “Golie” E. Haynes 2025 Pasadena, CA
Blair Haynes 1938-2025 Coos Bay, OR
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John R. Hennekam 1934-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Mary Hense 2025 Altadena, CA
Thomas Neal Hermstad 1940-2025 Seal Beach, CA
Chris Higgins 1930-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Barry James Hildebrand 1933-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
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Duane Mayo Hinds 1927-2025 Gardena, CA
Sam Holloway 1939-2025 Whittier, CA
Pauline and Fred Hooker 1930-2025 • 1929-2025 San Pedro, CA
Anna Maria Duran Hughes 1971-2025 Santa Maria, CA
Kenneth Paul Hutchins 1956-2025 Torrance, CA
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Deanna Linn Janusz 1956-2025 Upland, CA
Dinka R Jeldum 1939-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Mary Ann Kaestner 1929-2025 Seal Beach, CA
Toni Kellogg 1948 - 2025 Long Beach, CA
Ida F. Kemperman 1938 - 2025 Torrance, CA
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John L. Killen 1929-2024 Arcadia, CA
Frederick William Klink 1941-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Albin Cooper Koch 1933-2025 Pasadena, CA
Doug Kranwinkle 2025 Pasadena, CA
Joseph Wayne Kurlak 1935-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
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Madeline Kurrasch 1941-2025 Aiken, SC
Robert John Lammers 1950-2025 Stanton, CA
Josephine Kristina Lauro 1966-2025 Laguna Niguel, CA
Thulan Le 1949-2025 Long Beach, CA
Nancy A Lemus 1936-2025 Whittier, CA
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Marilyn Jean Lepape 1939 - 2025 Gig Harbor, WA
Andrea Lillehaug 1940-2025 Long Beach, CA
Lawrence Robert Lopez 1950-2025 Palos Verdes Estates
Roberta Ethel Lowe 2025 Cypress, CA
James Madison Lynch (91) 1933-2025 Long Beach, CA
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Rafael Maestro, Jr. 1958-2025 Long Beach, CA
Melvin Roy Manker 1938-2025 Sanibel, Florida
Natalie Dolores (Johnson) McBee 1922-2025 Torrance, CA
Betty Ann McClendon 1946-2025 Lakewood, CA
Heather Ann McCutchan 1951-2025 San Pedro, CA
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Dorothy “Dee Dee” Medak 1934-2025 San Pedro, CA
Isaias P. Medina 1940-2025 San Pedro CA
Eleanor R. Montano 1930-202 Wilmington, CA
Barbara Ann Mores 1937-2025 San Pedro, CA
Joseph Francis Morrison, Jr. 1943-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
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Frances Katherine Nathanson 1924-2025 Tarzana, CA
Walter Ray Newman 2025 Pasadena, CA
Michele Margaret Nies 2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Alice Nishimoto 1925-2025 Long Beach, CA
Helen Ann Noel 1940-2025 Long Beach, CA
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Elizabeth (Beth) Vaughan O’Gorman 1939-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
William Olson 1990-2025 Altadena, CA
Sondra Olson 1937-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Elodia R. Ortiz 1921-2025 San Pedro, CA
Kathleen Clark Patmore 1927-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
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Joe George Petrotta 1929-2025 Pasadena, CA
Lee Pomeroy 1946-2025 San Pedro, CA
Lucille (Brickner) Pophoff 1930-2025 San Pedro, CA
Robert “Bob” Proctor 1940-2025 Altadena, CA
Donald J. Radcliff 1950-2025 Pasadena, CA
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Elizabeth J. Redoglia 1925-2025 Pasadena CA
Leonard Reid 1934-2025 Sherman Oaks, CA
Howard Reinard 1941-2025 Long Beach, CA
Dr. James C. Reitz, MD 1928 - 2025 Palm Desert, CA
Irene Reyes 1957-2025 Pasadena, CA
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Sandra, “Sandy,” JoAnn Aguilar Reprogle Richardson 1946-2025 Lakewood, CA
Rick Roberti 1958-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
Mike Romero 1937-2025 Pasadena, CA
John Stanford Roquemore 2025 Altadena, CA
Susan Jacobsen Rose 1931-2025 Long Beach, CA
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Genevieve Mae Rue 1923-2025 Apple Valley, CA
Susan Rupp 1947-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Katherine Ann Saggiani 1935-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Marie Savidan 1926-2025 Torrance, CA
Vicki Eileen (Slagg) Scrimger, MFT 1945-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
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Andrew T Seymour 1932-2025 Cypress, CA
Harry “Lucky” Sheldon 1938-2024 Redondo Beach, CA
Perez Shoemaker 1955-2025 San Dimas, CA
Diane Simons 1940-2025 Los Angeles, CA
Donald L. Simpson 1929-2025 Glendora, CA
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Cinderella F. Sims-Ramos aka Cindy Sands 1954-2025 Covina, CA
Leslie Jean Sinclair 1950-2025 Hacienda Heights, CA
Peggy Sisson 1945-2025 Pasadena, CA
Wilburn “Bill” Smith 1935-2025 Cypress, CA
George Spiegel 1949-2025 Long Beach, CA
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Louis Spunt, aka Luie Kona 1937-2025 Hermosa Beach, CA
Kay Stark 1930-2025 Whittier, CA
Nancy Rounds Stimson 1928-2025 Pasadena, CA
Robert Brooks “Bob” Blanchard Pilot, Family Man, Storyteller 1939-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Carolina Olvera Suarez 1930-2025 Wilmington, CA
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Marian Olga (Chleboski) Suggs 1937-2025 Fallbrook, CA
Aya Takahashi 2025 Culver City, CA
Patsy Ann Talley 1940-2025 Hawaiian Gardens, CA
Lillian Tanaka 2025 Monterey Park, CA
John David Taylor 1933-2025 Pasadena, CA
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Sherrill Jean Truax 1949-2025 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
Judith Ann Turner 1943-2025 Torrance, CA
Chieko Ueda 2025 Torrance, CA
James R. Ukropina 1937-2025 Pasadena, CA
Roberta Uphoff “Sirois” 1935-20205 Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
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Sylvia (Dillon) Valdez 1948-2025 Garden Grove, CA
Robert “Bob” Valentine 2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Mary Lucille Vogt 1933-2025 Palos Verdes Estates, CA
Craig Ahmad Warner 2025 Carson, CA
Josephine Whitcombe 1931-2025 Los Angeles, CA
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Ann Ryan Wickler 1942-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
Lorraine Mary Kimp Williams 1930-2025 Ooak Hill, VA
Estella V. Windhorst 1942-2025 Lake Havasu City, AZ
Arvel B. Witte 1933-2025 Los Angeles, CA
Peter Jan Wollner 1937-2025 Hollywood Riviera, CA
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Patty Woods 1933-2025 Redondo Beach, CA
Donna Kathryn Woods 2025 Arcadia, CA
Jean Carolyn Wren (Lovelady) 2025 Torrance, CA
Jayne Frances Yessis 1942-2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Joan Zelko 1941-2025 Martinez, CA
In Loving Memory
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Jeremy Ian Zwickel (AKA J, JJ, JZ) 1996 - 2025 Manhattan Beach, CA
Carolyn Feldman 1934-2024 San Gabriel, CA
Nancy Clemens Porteous 1929-2023 Los Angeles, CA
May the constant love of caring friends soften your sadness. May cherished memories bring you moments of comfort. May lasting peace surround your grieving heart.
How to Support a Friend Who Has Lost a Loved One
I
t is never easy for someone who has lost a member of the family, even when it comes at the end of a long life or a prolonged illness. The loss is always deeply felt and followed by a period of grief. Considering this, how can you help support a friend who has suffered such a loss? Here are seven simple suggestions.
to be one of them. However, don’t pressure your friend to invite you to stay to share the meal. Rather than intruding on family time, simply drop the meal off and leave.
5. Show up for visitation and for the funeral
A day or two prior to many funerals, there are times designated for visitation. Often called a wake, this is an opportunity for people togather to view the body and to express their condolences to the family. Show up for at least a few minutes during one of these times,and then do your best to attend the funeral itself. If you are unable to attend the funeral in person, at least check in periodically over the phone or online.
1. Be there for your friend
Expressing your support by being physically present with your friend is perhaps the single most appreciated action you can take. Because of the sensitive nature of the situation, many friends fail at this most basic task. Be sure to devote some time to spend with your friend in the days and weeks following the loss.
2. Don’t talk; listen
Your friend is likely experiencing a number of thoughts regarding the deceased, and you can be their sounding board. It is appropriatefor you to offer the occasional comment in order to share personal recollections, express sympathy, and provide encouragement, but
most of the time you should just listen to what they have to say, and empathize with the feelings they share. Allow your friend to work through volatile emotions, freely express grief without fear of judgment, and tell you how the deceased had an impact on his or her life.
3. Provide childcare
If your friend has children, volunteer to take care of them for an afternoon or evening.
Particularly if your friend has to make funeral arrangements to handle, your offer can allow them to focus on those responsibilities without the hassle of arranging for a babysitter.
4. Drop off a meal
Prepare a home cooked meal and deliver it to your friend. There are enough things demanding their attention— preparing meals doesn’t have
6. Offer to help out with the reception
If your friend is responsible for organizing a reception following the funeral, volunteer your services. There are a variety of ways you can help out. For instance, you can offer your home as a possible location. You could also help with preparations if the reception is to be held at another location. If sandwiches or sweets are desired, you could offer to prepare some. During
the reception, you could assist as a host. Afterward, stick around to help clean up.
7. Check in
Grief doesn’t simply end after the funeral. In fact, after the funeral is when the journey through grief truly begins. Check in with your friend regularly after the death. Remember the anniversary of the loss and ask your friend how you can support them on this day. Offer your company, assistance and support through the months and years to come. Allow your friend to relax and show honest emotions. Losing a loved one can be an intensely stressful and exhausting experience. Your friend should not have to put on a brave face or attend to your needs. Give them the space and freedom they need to process the loss, even if it extends well beyond the date of the funeral. By being sensitive to your friend’s mental and emotional state—and by taking some responsibilities upon yourself—you can help remove some of the weight from their shoulders. Your support in these ways will go a long way toward helping your friend through this time of loss. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
Steps to take when filing a will
A
s with being born and having to pay taxes, we all face the prospect of our own death. If you plan on living to a ripe old age, it’s important to make things easier on those you leave behind by preparing a proper last will and testament. Benefits of creating a last will and testament
When you file a will, your final wishes are laid out in black and white, leaving no ambiguity about how you want your assets divided. By creating a will that is watertight, you can make your death less stressful for your survivors. You should also have peace of mind knowing your survivors will be taken care of when you are gone. Although it’s unsettling to think of your own death and the world without you in it, consider how you’d like your assets to be distributed once you are gone. Typically people contemplate how they’d like to leave their children, spouse, favorite charities and other loved onesin the event of their death.
When is a good time to start planning your final wishes?
Consider preparing a last will and testament once you’ve acquired assets or dependents. If you work full time, have a spouse orchildren, own a home, or have savings, it’s the right time to start planning.
Preparing the will
Don’t know how to get started? Follow these steps to begin planning your final wishes. 1. Account for all of your assets and debts Create a comprehensive list of everything you own or are entitled to. This includes, but is not limited to: • Real estate holdings • Life insurance policies
• Vehicles • Cars • Boats • Recreational vehicles • Financial investments • Owned businesses • 401(k) • RRSPs • Home equity • Stocks • Bonds • Pensions •O ther retirement savings and portfolios • Debts and liabilities 2. Assign a trustee A trustee, or executor, is the person who you assign to carry out the instructions held in your last will and testament. Their duties can include the distribution of assets, funeral planning, death announcement, services, cremation or care of your final remains, and distribution of your assets as set out in your will.
Ensure that the person you select to administer your estate is okay with being appointed as such before assigning them. The job of anexecutor or trustee is complex and stressful, usually taking months or years to conclude. Make sure they are up to the task. 3. List all beneficiaries Construct a list of relatives, friends and charities that you would like to remember in your will. This can include your spouse, children, siblings, parents and in-laws, charities you support, and any other people or organizations that you want to leave some of your accumulated wealth to. Write down the exact assets or percentage of the total estate that each person or organization will receive. 4. Final wishes for your bodily remains Perhaps you want to be interred in a tomb, with a simple grave, or extravagant headstone. Or maybe you
want your body to be cremated and your ashes scattered over your favorite lake, ski hill, ocean vista or other special place. Your wishes are yours alone, andcan be as personal as you like. Whatever they may be, ensure your requests are clearly identified in your will. 5. Make it legal Contact a lawyer that specializes in estate law. They know the current rules and regulations regarding wills, how they may affect your wishes, and the best ways to take care of those left behind. It’s better to be safe than sorry. There is no substitute for a legal will. Writing a letter or informal statement about how you’d like your assets divided might be a nice gesture to your survivors, but does not take the place of a will. Don’t risk your financial legacy being mismanaged. Don’t jeopardize the understanding of your final wishes. You can purchase a kit to create a will yourself. This will be less expensive than using a lawyer, but may not be as binding and watertightas you might like. If your will has complex instructions, it’s best to consult a lawyer.
Maintaining your wishes
Divorces, new marriages, new children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, favorite charities or new circumstances may raise the need to change your will, to either include new entries to your will, or have some taken out of it. After having your last will and testament written up, signed and witnessed, you will have to make changes to it as your life unfolds. Make it a habit to revisit your final wishes when life changes occur, or every few years. That way, you can rest assured loved ones will be taken care of when you are gone. - TRIBUTE TECHNOLOGY
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