The Gift of Friendship

By:Jane Osgerby

When I think about special “gifts” I have received, my friendship with Rev. Dr. Bernard LaFayette, Jr. and his wife, Kate Bulls LaFayette comes to mind. I have been privileged to know them for thirtytwo wonderful years. I am a 78 year old white female from Tullahoma, TN, and of course I grew up accustomed to the “southern” way of life. At the age of 15, I watched the sit-in movement unfold in nearby Nashville, followed by the Freedom Rides. Keeping up with the events on television actually changed my way of thinking and continue to give me hope for the future. In 1990, I met Dr. LaFayette and his family.

What can one say about a man who worked with and for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.? A real hero, educator, and minister who has lived his whole life successfully carrying out Dr. King’s mandate to him? A man known all over the world for his courage and leadership, who has been honored with so many major tributes?

Many people know that Dr. King’s last words to Dr. LaFayette, in Memphis, 1968, directed him to “institutionalize and internationalize” nonviolence. But how many know that he is still, to this day, on a mission to carry out that mandate? There is not space in this publication to enumerate all his work in that direction, so I will attempt to highlight a few of them.

Working through the King Center in Atlanta and USAID, Dr. LaFayette oversaw the “training of trainers” in South Africa in the early 1990s that led to major positive change. He worked with leaders of FEHN (The Foundation for. Ethnic Harmony in Nigeria) between 2007 to 2018 to train and transform over 30,000 Niger Delta ex-militants. Between 2000 and 2017, Dr. LaFayette led trainings in Medellin, Colombia, South America, for thousands, including inmates at major prisons which reduced killings, to name just a few of his accomplishments. Meanwhile, he established King Centers across the United States, and set up on-going departments at the University of Rhode Island, Emory University in Atlanta, and currently at Auburn University in Alabama where Kingian Nonviolence is taught.

These major accomplishments are easy to read about, and I strongly suggest that you do. Our friendship has enabled me to know another side of this magnificent man. I see Bernard and Kate as a unit even if they are on opposite sides of the world. They are so supportive of each other and so in love that after over fifty years of marriage, they still set the standard for a perfect relationship. I have met their wonderful families and watched with awe as they provide care and love and support for all of them.

Kate had her own career as an educator and specialist on Early Childhood Development. As a young college student, she participated in campaigns to win voting rights for African American citizens while home during breaks from Tufts University. She worked alongside her husband at the Poor People’s Campaign, setting up facilities for child care for the people who attended the march. For 24 years, Kate was Director of Head Start in her hometown of Tuskegee.

So, how could Jane from Tullahoma be involved in building playground equipment in South Florida in August, 1993? To assist Dr. LaFayette and Mrs. Coretta Scott King who had together raised the money, a year after Hurricane Andrew’s devastation. This involved felony offenders from Tennessee doing the carpentry work while being assisted by students from American Baptist College. And, we lived in an Army barracks tent in a camp set up by Rev. Franklin Graham on the edge of the Everglades! This resulted in children in three areas having something fun to occupy their time while waiting for their homes to be rebuilt. Since I was employed by the state of Tennessee, this arrangement was a great fit.

I could tell you about traveling to Haiti in the late 1990s on a fact-finding mission for implementing Kingian Nonviolence training there. I must admit being a bit taken aback when interviewing a Voudou Priest! I hosted Pete and Toshi Seeger in Nashville when I was chairperson of a benefit concert by Pete to raise funds for Dr. LaFayette’s program, “The Godfathers.” I spent every Tuesday evening at Progressive Baptist Church helping to feed and provide activities for the children involved.

I can honestly state that knowing Bernard and Kate LaFayette has changed my life for the better in enough ways to fill a whole book. They are much more like family than friends, and I cherish every moment I am blessed to spend with them.