When Autumn Came

When Autumn Came Give some tree the gift of green again Let one bird sing again To make me alive With the trees.

Let them breathe A song In us Once more.

I’ve forgotten How long I’ve lived Beneath This Rumble Suffocating To speak And To be heard.

Let this Be for Me. For me, As I want It for you.

You, Who has Forgotten To look Into the hazel Of another And Love again.

You, Who’s forgotten To believe in the Galaxies you Hold within yourself.

You, Who told me We’re just A language A sentence

A word An action A thought away From understanding each other In and out.

You, Who believes Heavy hearts Are hard to live with.

And that hope makes us alive.

But hope, Is irrelevant for me.

Hope is painful.

I hate us.

I hate the thought of us.

I hate that when the night is alive With thoughts that are Wild and free, Like the wind I want, You’re all I think of.

I know I would never be enough for you So let me in again To find myself In you.

For I, Am flawed Deeply and disastrously.

I know for heaven’s sake There’s always uncertainty In your decision Concerning me.

If I were you, I would have had the same.

I built a box around me Too tough to break in.

Left a crack A little too deep For you.

But, In between these four walls You left me stranded Stripped me naked Of my thoughts And scars Knowing full well They’ll strangle me

till I suffocate.

Maliciously, You watched me try and catch my breath While I burned my own soul for you.

Our lives Are supposed to be great Not long.

So, Resurrect The birds, Oh God of May So that you And I Can come Alive Once again And live To find peace Within us For ourselves.

To have you breathing The same air as mine Existing near Maybe not near me But always away At a hand’s length.

Until One day I make sure you die Because you Wanted me to love you.

And that day I shall care. ~