Santa Barbara Sentinel #1/8

GOLETA GIRL

THE SENTINEL GOES ON PATROL IN OLD TOWN (BOOK ‘EM, JAN-O)

BY JANA MACKIN, P. 22

THE WEEKLY CAPITALIST

THE ELECTION IS OVER AND WE’RE ALL GOING TO HELL. UH-OH.

THE DISH

STARS COME OUT IN FORCE AT BACARA TO SUPPORT DREAM FOUNDATION

BY JEFF HARDING, P. 14

BY WENDY JENSON,, P. 6

SANTA BARBARA

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once a week from pier to peak

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cover photo: BillHeller.com

LA ARCADA CHRISTMAS WALK KICKING OFF THE HOLIDAY SEASON AMONG AN INVITING ARRAY OF BLINKING LIGHTS, STROLLING CAROLERS, JAZZ MUSICIANS, THE SMELL OF FRESH POPCORN, WARM APPLE CIDER AND A VISIT FROM SANTA IS WHAT MAKES THIS EVENING’S EVENT SO EVER-LOVIN’ POPULAR (STORY BEGINS ON PAGE 12)

SBVIEW.COM PAGE 10

PRESIDIOSPORTS PAGE 16

PLAN B PAGE 18

LOVEMIKANA.COM PAGE 19

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MAZZA’S MISSIVE

ONTENTS

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by Matt Mazza Mazza’s Missive – Santa Barbara really shows off at this time of year but its beauty is more than skin deep as the philanthropic community pulls out all the stops with events like Montecito Bank & Trust’s Community Dividends Awards at the Coral Casino and the Dream Foundation’s gala at Bacara. Oh, and Matt explores his inner poet at SBMA’s most recent installment of its (terrific) Atelier series.

Letters to the Editor – The Mistreatment of Mr. Higgins in last week’s Sentinel’s Take draws a couple interesting letters; Right Side Up Poets express thanks for the ink; Goleta’s Jill Anderson takes Editor-in-Chief Matt Mazza to task over Crime Time; and UCSB’s “Don Ho” tells Matt to figure it out…and stop paying for cover charges and meals. (Great idea, Don.) The Sentinel’s Take – The Sentinel’s editorial staff is lobotomized by Santa Barbara’s City Council. The Sentinel’s editorial staff is lobotomized by Santa Barbara’s City Council.

(Wait, did we already say that?)

The Dish – Wendy Jenson spends a few moments with local gal Katy Perry at the 11th Annual Celebration of Dreams gala at Bacara.

(No, Ms. Perry is not wearing spinning cones on her, ah, bosom.

Neither is Wendy.) Must’ve been nice, Wendy, maybe you can get the rest of us here at the Sentinel a couple tickets next year.

It’s Crime Time with SBPD – Obama’s jobs bill and small business stimulus are working perfectly, as one drunken Atascadero resident attests in Crime Time’s new Quote of the Week. (This is going to be fun.) Rent-A-Cops lie and do coke on Milpas. And hey guys, rest easy, women are violent criminals too.

Santa Barbara View – Sharon Byrne and the Milpas Community Association take the lead in bringing local business together in a fantastic guerilla fund-raising effort to deliver some holiday cheer to the eponymous thoroughfare (great work, guys, we are rooting for you); Loretta Redd bemoans Southern California Edison’s “Smart Meter” (maybe SCE can pony up some of those new profits to help Milpas out for the holidays); and Ray Estrada takes a look at Union Bank’s acquisition of Santa Barbara bank & Trust.

Journal Jim – On loan from his beloved Montecito Journal, Jim Buckley reminds us that the holidays begin this week at the La Arcada Christmas Walk. Thanks Jim, nice piece (as usual). See you there. (And, hey, maybe someday the Sentinel will actually contribute something to the Journal…if you’ll have us, that is.)

The Weekly Capitalist – Obama won. We’re going to hell. (But hey Jeff, would it have been any different had Romney won?)

The More Things Change… – Hattie Beresford takes us back to a time when young co-eds had fun in the wilderness above Carpinteria. What? Young people do stuff together in the woods away from their parents’ watchful eyes? And it’s been going on for 100 years? No…

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

I

love this time of year around here. The crowds have thinned out, traffic is light, I seem to bump into friends on the street more often. Business (usually though not always) slows a bit, as the community remembers what, exactly, we are working for in the first place. People seem generally happy, excitedly looking forward to the holiday festivities and celebrations with family and friends.

The weather is typically fantastic – even the rain last week was a refreshing change – and the crystal clear blue-grey skies of another Santa Barbara autumn seem to go on forever. The mountains are alive, especially in the early mornings, and the water is occasionally so calm and still that it looks like a huge mirror stretching out to the islands, reflecting the warmth of a more distant sun right onto the beaches and streets and buildings in town.

It’s a beautiful place, Santa Barbara and environs, and one could effectively argue that its charm and grace – its artistry – is never more evident than right now.

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The Montecito Bank & Trust Community Dividends Awards Luncheon event was lovely – the view from the terrace at the Coral Casino never ceases to amaze – and really reflected both the physical and metaphysical beauty of Santa Barbara (photo: Clint Weisman).

Presidio Sports – Santa Barbara High men’s water polo settles for runner-up in the CIF Division 2 tournament (hell of a season, guys, be proud); DP’s Bryan Fernandez won the school’s first ever individual CIF cross country title (congrats, Bryan) and was named SBART Athlete of the Week along with SBCC cross country runner Cecilia Instebo, who placed second at the JC State Championships.

All the local sports scores and stories of the week are here, too.

Plan B – Briana Westmacott follows the Bhutanese Buddhists and seeks a simpler holiday season based more on a “Gross National Happiness” philosophy than her more typical “Shop till you Drop” outlook. But she breeds shoppers and writes a style column, so that may actually be impossible.

LOVEmikana – Wine & Dine bird Alexis Wiseley brings us a chocolate club—yeah, you read that right—to complement your wine club (or whatever other club you might be a member of). And check out LOVEmikana’s Weekend Guide as we head into a busy long holiday weekend around town.

Goleta Girl – Jana Mackin walks an Old Town Goleta beat with Senior Deputy Greg Sorenson in Goleta Five-0. (Book ‘em, Jan-o.)

Residential Real Estate – Sotheby’s agent Michael Calcagno serves up three tasty properties for the Thanksgiving weekend. Justin Kellenberger provides the gravy. (Sorry, that doesn’t make much sense. Just go check out this week’s properties and how much they will cost you.)

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Community Dividend Recipients Monica Spear (Girls Inc.), Joyce McCullough (Habitat for Humanity), Jonathan Fox (Ensemble Theater Company) and Roger Durling (SB International Film Festival) enjoy the gorgeous afternoon (photo: Clint Weisman).

We’re Pretty on the Inside Too But Santa Barbara’s beauty is not just skin deep, not by a long shot. The holiday season is also a time when we Santa Barbarians can really see the generosity and kindness that permeates our community. Philanthropy indeed reigns king around this time of year, and local individuals and families devote time and effort and, yes, money to their favorite causes as the year comes to a close.

One shining example of such altruism is the Montecito Bank & Trust Community Dividends Awards Luncheon that went down at the Coral Casino just before

the holiday. (The Dream Foundation’s recent gala at Bacara is another.) The bank celebrated its tenth consecutive year of giving $1 million to a wide variety of Santa Barbara-area non-profits. In other words, Montecito Bank & Trust, and its magnanimous chairman, Michael Towbes, have now provided a whopping $10 million over the last decade to support organizations that serve primarily local low and moderate income individuals and families. This year alone, the Bank supported 180 non-profits.

That’s a big deal, frankly, and it serves as a reminder to all of us – even those of us who give on a far smaller scale – of what the fabric of our community is made of. ...continued p.8

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Letters

Although you might not believe it, we actually want to hear from you. So if you have something you think we should know about or you see something we've said that you think is cretinous (or perspicacious, to be fair), then let us know. There's no limit on words or subject matter, so go ahead and let it rip to: Santa Barbara Sentinel, Letters to the Editor, 133 East De La Guerra Street, No. 182, Santa Barbara, California 93101. You can also leap into the 21st century and email us at letters@santabarbarasentintel.com.

A Plaque at St. Anthony’s Seminary?

The plaque at the Mission Renewal Center acknowledging the survivors of abuse at St. Anthony’s Seminary is a step in the right direction but something more should be done at the Seminary itself as part of the landmark designation.

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att, yes, an apology is certainly due to Mr. Higgins, and thanks for calling the City out on the issue of St Anthony’s. A clearly visible and prominent bronze plaque should accompany the dedication and spell out the history. I believe there are also such plaques on other notable historic landmarks such as Dachau, Auschwitz-Birkenau, Belzec, Chelmno, Majdanek, Sobibor, and Treblinka so people do not forget what went on inside the walls of those buildings.

Dr. Edo McGowan Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: Nice to hear from you again, Dr. McGowan, we agree on this one. I too

believe a plaque dedicated to the survivors of the (horrific) abuse at St. Anthony’s should be part of the landmark dedication so that (1) our community never forgets what happened there and (2) in the words of Michael Higgins, “we may protect our children in the future and prevent the blindness that allow[ed] wholesale abuse to become acceptable in an organization allowed to run rampant.” With that said, I note that there is indeed a small plaque next door, at the Mission Renewal Center, that acknowledges the pain of those who were abused at the Seminary (pictured above) but I still believe that something at the old Seminary itself would be appropriate. Perhaps San Roque School Charitable Trust could come up with some suitable language. –MSM)

Can We Move On, Please?

Dear Editor – I don’t disagree that Ray Higgins might have been acknowledged

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more readily by the City Council at last week’s meeting but also feel compelled to suggest that it is time to move on as a community with a more positive outlook.

St. Anthony’s has paid its debt – there is no doubt that a large one was owed – and the new owners are doing some very important and extensive construction and revitalization work to benefit the community at large. Shouldn’t we acknowledge that too? Can’t we do that without constantly discussing the sins of the past, and instead focus on a more positive, more productive future?

A Concerned Citizen Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: This is an important point and I am glad you made it, even if anonymously. My own feeling – perhaps not set forth particularly eloquently in my response to Dr. McGowan’s letter immediately above – is that “moving on” as a community actually requires remembering “the sins of the past.” In fact, my belief is that only by acknowledging and accepting the notorious legacy of the Seminary can we actually move forward in a new and more positive direction. I have little doubt that San Roque School Charitable Trust is doing and will continue to do fabulous work in that regard; it was neither my intention nor that of this paper to suggest otherwise. We only meant to ensure that the survivors of the Seminary and their families are afforded the proper respect generally, but also especially when they stand up in a public forum and support recognition of the place that caused them so much pain as a city landmark. And I think that an important piece of that respect is acknowledging and understanding the history and the survivors so that we can indeed move forward in a (vastly) more positive direction.

Thus, the concept of the plaque mentioned above. Again, I appreciate the letter and the perspective... next time, make sure and let me know your name. –MSM)

Right Side Up Poets Say Thanks Hi Matt, I just wanted to thank you for the wonderful article about the spoken word show at SOhO last week. It meant a lot to us to get covered in your publication. I was really happy to hear you came to the show without really knowing what to expect and then ended up enjoying it so immensely.

That’s our goal in a lot of ways. Anyway, thank you so much, and I’ll keep you posted on future events if you’d like. You will always be welcome!

Demi Anter Right Side Up Poets Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: It’s a great show, Demi, and I’m happy to support it. The fact is that I wouldn’t have written about it otherwise – I was honestly quite pleasantly surprised and ended up really enjoying myself. So please do keep me and the paper posted on future events, and please pass along my congratulations to the rest of the cast and crew. Most importantly, though, have a great holiday season. Thanks for reaching out. –MSM)

Crime Time Is Itself Criminal Editor-in-Chief – I read Robert Ornstein’s letter last week and must wholeheartedly disagree that the Sentinel’s Crime Time column is a “meaningful public service.” That’s just nonsense. The column is clearly just a juvenile attempt to exploit the poor and diseased among us. It isn’t funny. You, Matt Mazza, as Editor-in-Chief of the Sentinel, should show some leadership and discontinue it. You talk of intelligent discourse and a platform for reasonable debate, but Crime Time flies in the face of such words.

Jill Anderson Goleta (Editor’s Note: You’ve made your point, Jill, that’s for sure. And your letter is illustrative of the broad spectrum of perspective I’ve seen and heard in connection with Crime Time. The fact is that I see the column as an interesting forum for framing up some of the most pressing issues Santa Barbara and Goleta and environs face. (The causes and effects of the ever-expanding homeless population and how best to address it is one example. There are others.) That’s not to say that there isn’t gratuitous commentary and, yes, occasionally humor involved. (This week is admittedly particularly egregious in that regard.) But my experience is that this can be a way to approach a difficult topic, to get it into the public eye. That can lead to more awareness and more of that very “intelligent discourse” for which I’ve advocated. And that, in turn, can be an engine of change. It may not always be pretty, Jill, but it’s real and I stand by it.

That’s the only type of leadership I am capable of. Thanks for the letter; I hope you’ll keep reading not just Crime Time but the whole paper too. –MSM)

The Sentinel Has No Clout Matt – I couldn’t help but notice that you “paid the cover” at SOhO when you went to see the spoken word show last week. I thought that the whole benefit of a job like yours was free entry and meals for kicking down a good review. What about Mark Leisure? Did he pay when he saw Spencer the Gardener? Figure it out.

Don Ho UCSB (Editor’s Note: Thanks for your email, Mr., uh, Ho. Yeah, we here at the Sentinel mostly pay our cover charges, although there have been certain events to which we were (mercifully) permitted access sans fees. I was indeed led to believe that one of the perks of this gig is extensive access… but I guess we’ll have to get a few more issues under our belts before that whole thing really takes off. And the wonderful meals with fantastic bottles of wine you mentioned? I have them, probably too often, but I still pay for every one of them.

(Dare to dream.) As for Mr. Leisure, well, I can’t say for sure but I sincerely doubt he’s paid a cover in the past ten years. And he’s never even had to write anything in exchange for the privilege. I do need to figure it out, man, seriously. –MSM)

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Dumb and Dumber

take

W

e just got screwed.

And as if that weren’t enough by itself, we were also subjected to the world’s first non-surgical lobotomy at the very same time.

Tough day.

The lobotomy-performing and screwing party wasn’t some neighborhood thug or outlaw psychiatrist. Not even close. It was a group of rogue elected officials hell-bent on destroying any and all things rational, reasonable and efficient. All things good.

No, we’re not talking about some foreign government with ties to al Qaeda.

We’re talking about the Santa Barbara City Council.

Let us be clear: It’s not the Councilmembers themselves, per se, who did the actual screwing and lobotomizing. (Indeed, they too may be victims of the latter.) It’s the process that they are a part of that ultimately did us in. It’s the process that’s to blame here.

And we’re pissed.

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livinghappy livinghealthy

Wishing you and yours

Stroking Each Other Is Good, Right?

It all started with a seemingly innocent trip to the weekly City Council meeting that happens every Tuesday. This past week began as every other week has since the Sentinel began attending these shows, er, meetings, with a Mayoral proclamation congratulating an organization or one public employee or another for its (or his or her) successes and accomplishments. This week, it was a proclamation acknowledging domestic violence month and congratulating Soroptimist International of Santa Barbara for its “workplace campaign to end domestic violence.” What? Is domestic violence a thing of the past now?

Probably not, but hey, these people are “working hard” to end it and that must be worth something, right?

Now there is no doubt that domestic violence is bad, even very bad, and this paper stands firmly behind any and all efforts to eradicate it at all levels, whether in the home or the workplace or anywhere else. But do we really need to have the Mayor read a proclamation each week? Do we really need the Mayor to acknowledge, for example, a “police records specialist” who has been on the job for five years? What’s the point? Is constant stroking necessary for all benevolent organizations? For all public employees?

The truth is that just going through the motions every week only devalues the whole idea of acknowledging excellence. It takes away the “specialness” of the recognition when it happens all the time. And it results in a waste of time. Precious time. (The relevance of time in this particular will become all too painfully clear in a bit.)

We don’t want to get too far off topic here, really, but can any of you imagine this happening in the business world in a company that has fiduciary obligations to its shareholders and is cash-strapped? Sure, the Apples and Oracles and Googles and other cash-rich companies may have a yearly convention replete with mutual glad-handing and shoulder-patting and ego-stroking but companies that have serious fiscal concerns or are on the brink of going broke probably skip that stuff, or at least they should. In fact, it’s just that type of waste and mismanagement that leads to taxpayer revolts…er, ah, shareholder lawsuits. But we digress.

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There Are Insane People At City Council Meetings After the Mayor’s moment comes general public comments. These comments can be about anything the public wants to discuss, apparently including the inherent non-monetary value of art and our distorted relationship to each other as a consequence of the fiat currency. (We didn’t make that up.) We’re pretty sure that nobody was listening after a few moments but we could be wrong. Either way, though, it’s more wasted time here. (We’re getting there on the time issue, don’t worry.)

Now comes the meat of the matter: the consent calendar—an often excruciatingly long portion of the meeting in which Councilmembers have free reign, for instance, to interrogate both public and private entities or individuals who are doing business in one way or another with the City—and a series of astonishingly boring reports from administrative and other agencies.

This week, serious questions were raised regarding a professional services agreement with a closed circuit television provider to look inside SB’s sewer mains in an effort to predict maintenance and repair needs. (Cue jokes about sewage on film!) Then a series of questions were asked about sidewalk access ramps in an effort to ensure that the appropriate public works committee was doing everything it could to install as many ramps as possible within its budget.

Answers were given. Abstentions were granted. And then everybody voted—save those who abstained—in favor of everything on the consent calendar. Like just about every other vote we’ve seen to date.

The onslaught continued with a truly mind-numbing report by the Airport Department regarding the status of the Airport Master Plan project. It went on for hours…no, it went on for days, weeks even. It turns out that it takes approximately two-years (!) for a private company (billing by the hour?) to draft the updated Master Plan, and the process is only ...continued p.11

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by Wendy Jenson A former magazine editor, Wendy worked at

Harper’s Bazaar, Glamour, and Us Weekly in NYC, before moving west with Santa Barbara Magazine. Currently a public relations consultant, she relishes being out and about working on this column.

(Photos by Charley Gallay/Getty Images)

California Dreams

Jennifer Tilly had auction magic of her own.

Jane Lynch worked her auction magic.

Auctioneer Jane Lynch and spouse Lara Embry, Iron Chef Cat Cora, Honoree Katy Perry, and Cat’s spouse Jennifer Cora work it.

“I

am so excited to be in Santa Barbara! It’s a place where my roots are,” said hometown girl Katy Perry, clicking her heels three times at the 11th Annual Celebration of Dreams fundraiser on November 16th at Bacara Resort & Spa. Honored Friday evening: Perry, Nigel Lythgoe (So You Think You Can Dance), and the Families of Dream Foundation. Katy continued, “You’ve seen

so many different hair colors from me in the past year, from purple to blue to pink to black. When I was born here, I was a squirrel brown. That’s an exclusive for you all here tonight!”

“The name of my last tour was the California Dreams tour,” she said. “Dreams are a part of my vocabulary. It’s what’s driven me from the very beginning. I remember when I was thirteen and I was testing out

Dad and daughter duo David & Lakey Peterson. Lakey, who won the 2012 U.S. Open of Surfing in August, is ranked No. 7 in the world.

Co-Chair Bui Simon, Honoree Nigel Lythgoe, Dream Foundation Ambassador Priscilla Presley, Co-Chairs Mireille Noone and Jelinda DeVorzon.

Affianced Viktor Hammer and model Angelia de Meistre graduated from Pepperdine University in May. The great-grandson of oil tycoon and famed art collector, Armand Hammer, Viktor serves as the Vice President of the Armand Hammer Foundation, the Hammer Museum in Westwood, and the legendary Hammer Gallery in New York City. Viktor’s brother Armie Hammer famously portrayed the Winklevoss twins in The Social Network. Angie is the daughter of Evon de Meistre (active in the Santa Barbara community she runs a summer camp for underprivileged youth), and international film director David Wu. Congratulations to the happy couple!

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Fabulously well-dressed friends Katy Perry (looking lovely in Dolce & Gabbana) and Mia Moretti (so elegant in Naeem Khan and rocking dark nails).

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The Tenors (with Santa Barbara local Alan Thicke, center) performed a Katy Perry mash-up.

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Dream Foundation Founder and President Thomas Rollerson and the Dream Foundation Team continue to dream big. Each year, they somehow manage to top the previous gala, which raises nearly one third of the foundation’s entire operating budget.

The mission of Dream Foundation is to enhance the quality of life for individuals and their families facing a life-threatening illness by fulfilling a heart’s final wish. This year, Morgan Freeman’s voice welcomed guests.

“We are gathered here tonight... a collective... a force,” he announced in voiceover. Nearly 600 donors, supporters and volunteers filled Bacara’s Grand Ballroom. It was the largest turnout in the event’s history.

Nigel Lythgoe thanked his dear friend Priscilla Presley, who introduced him to Dream Foundation some six years ago. “I get more than I give. These people show me what Dream Foundation Founder and President Thomas Rollerson with is important,” said Lythgoe. “They Honoree Nigel Lythgoe. show me that the happiest people my songs at the farmers market. I would don’t necessarily have the best of everything. trade them. I would open up my guitar case The happiest people make the most out of and sometimes someone would come along everything they’ve got.”

The after-party at Bacara’s Miró with a bag of pistachios or an avocado. It got me to where I am today. It got me on restaurant, was presented by The Patrón stage with my spinning cone dress and I Spirits Company and Ultimat vodka. Hosts had to have a dream for that. Dreaming no John Paul and Eloise DeJoria and Katy matter how big or small will continue to be Perry enjoyed the musical stylings of DJ Mia Moretti. my mantra.”

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Editor-in-Chief • Matt Mazza Design/Production • Trent Watanabe Advertising/Sales • Tanis Nelson • Sue Brooks Contributing Partners Opinion • sbview.com Sports • Presidiosports.com Santa Barbara Skinny • LoveMikana.com Columnists Goleta Girl • Jana Mackin She Has Her Hands Full • Mara Peters Plan B • Briana Westmacott The Dish • Wendy Jenson Journal Jim • James Buckley Real Estate • Michael Calcagno Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy The More Things Change • Hattie Beresford The Weekly Capitalist • Jeff Harding Man About Town • Mark Leisure Published by SB Sentinel, LLC, Tim Buckley, Publisher PRINTED BY NPCP INC., SANTA BARBARA, CA Santa Barbara Sentinel is compiled every Friday 133 EAST DE LA GUERRA STREET, #182, Santa Barbara 93101 How to reach us: 805.845.1673 E-MAIL: matt@santabarbarasentinel.com

(Anecdotally, I’ve never seen anybody work a room like Primetime John Palminteri in the La Pacifica Ballroom. He was all over the place, cameraman hustling hard behind him, interviewing and shaking hands and planning his next move(s). John’s the real deal, man, trust me. Maybe if I grow out my moustache and really work hard, I can get there someday… but I doubt it.)

I’m Pretty Into Poetry.

So What?

The arts, too, are alive and well at this time of year. My wife and I recently attended Atelier at SBMA: Drinking with the Moon, and were really thrilled with the event. For those of you who don’t know (we didn’t), the Atelier series, now in its fifth season at Santa Barbara Museum of Art, provides an opportunity for guests to attend an evening of reasonably intimate and interesting interactions with art and artists in the museum’s galleries.

More simply put, Atelier is a great way to see and experience art at SBMA. And it’s pretty damn fun too.

Traditional Chinese dance in a gallery at SBMA. Not bad, not bad at all.

The event we attended was inspired by the exhibition presently on display, The Artful Recluse: Painting, Poetry, and Politics in 17th Century China. (I wrote briefly about the exhibition in a column a few weeks back setting forth my enthusiasm for smART Families, a program that introduces kids to the arts in an educational and engaging way.)

The collection comes from an interesting time in Chinese history filled with political and social strife, which saw some in society withdraw to focus on art and other more peaceable endeavors. Beautiful silk scrolls with stunning landscapes and other natural scenes depicted in ink are everywhere, and there are dozens and dozens of other meticulous renderings on all sorts of mediums. In many cases, poetry and other writings accompany the pieces themselves and really add to the experience.

After spending an hour strolling through the galleries, enjoying the art, reading poetry, we stopped to snack on a few hors d’oeuvres and sip a specialty cocktail (or two… they were terrific). And we both expressed a certain calmness, a distinct feeling of peacefulness, taken away from the ...continued p.21

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It'sCrimetime...

...with the SBPD

A variety of crimes are committed every day in Santa Barbara; most of these crimes are petty but they do offer a window into if not the soul of the perpetrator, at least his or her thought process. Our following (and totally unsolicited) thoughts, observations, and comments are put forth for your consideration.

Crime Time Quote Of The Week

A

24-year old Atascadero resident was detained for public intoxication after screaming at a woman on West Gutierrez Street. When asked his occupation, the man replied, “I’m trying to be sober.”

What? Is that a job now? The unemployment rate just plummeted to pre-recession lows!

Obama’s jobs policies are working! Four more years, four more years, four more years.

Unfortunately, when asked whether he had an employer, this discouraged (and highly intoxicated) worker said, “Obviously not.”

Hmmm…maybe he’s self-employed. Obama’s small business stimulus is working! Four more years, four more years…

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OBSERVATION: All the guy did was ask her about some hunky-man on her Facebook account and she lost it. Slapped him in the face, started throwing things around the apartment and then “flailed her arms” resulting in abrasions on his face, neck, shoulders and arms. Interestingly, the young woman complained of pain in her right big toe. (Must have dislocated it when she removed it from her boyfriend’s, ah, behind.)

COMMENT: A French guy got beat up by a girl? Can you say Freedom Fries?

(And why do women “flail” when provoked, like some sort of malevolent windmill with fingernails that might only be stopped by a soothing and patient Don Quixote?)

Rent-A-Cop CRIME: During a routine ABC check of a Milpas nightclub, SBPD assisted in checking

a uniformed guard wearing a police belt and carrying pepper spray. (Think para-military northern Baja vehicle checkpoint and you’ll get a good visual of the guard.) First the “guard” admitted to not having a valid permit for the belt and pepper spray, then he gave a false name in an effort to avoid a ticket. Then he gave his real name and was handcuffed and arrested. Then officers found a bag of cocaine in his pocket.

OBSERVATION: At least the patrons of the nightclub were safe. An unlicensed coked-up guard with a propensity to tell unnecessary lies was taking great care of everybody. Perfect.

We love y’all. Be good out there this week.

CRIME: A 50-year-old Goleta woman pushed and beat her (now ex?) live-in boyfriend one

morning last week while simultaneously pulling his hair and trying to steal the poor guy’s bike. She was arrested for battery.

OBSERVATION: The woman tried hard to convince SBPD that she was not the aggressor (surprise), but an independent witness told officers that the male victim “acted like a gentleman” while he was being violently attacked.

COMMENT: Talk about a multi-tasker, it sounds like this lady had four arms–one to push,

one to beat, one to pull hair and one to steal a bike… from a grown man. We can just imagine the scene: Some crazed woman screaming profanities and spitting and hitting and kicking and taking out hair by the handful while her boyfriend, acting gentlemanly and calmly, stands firm, protecting his bicycle (and his integrity), repeating “Baby, baby… please calm down baby. I don’t want to fight anymore, baby. Just relax. Come on baby, relaaaax”. And she’s just losing it, trying to kill the guy by clawing his brain out of his skull to get to his old jacked-up bike.

Come to think of it, men, this is precisely the reason you should live with your girlfriend for a few months (or longer) before you pop the question. You really do want to be sure that the stress that accompanies life and relationships won’t put you in precisely this situation. Seriously. We’ll bet dollars to dimes that the poor schnook above is in the pawn shop with that gorgeous two-carat engagement ring right now.

Bridezilla bride starts giving him hell about drinking too much. (Sound familiar?) After a bit of back and forth, she grabs a “large kitchen knife” and calmly advises her husband that she is “going to dress in white, we’re going to be all bloody, we’re going to be with God. I’m going to kill myself and the kids.” Then she slowly walks into their young twins’ room with the knife. He sobers up–quick–and calls 9-1-1. She is arrested for making “criminal threats.”

OBSERVATION: This isn’t funny. Unless it was some twisted scheme to get her husband

to lay off the booze. Even then, it’s still not funny, but it is genius. How much do you want to bet this guy never has another drink? Poor dude is going to work himself to death to keep his wife happy, and he’ll never have a glass of wine on an early Friday afternoon again.

Sacré Bleu!

CRIME: A young French woman beat up her French boyfriend and was arrested.

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Opinion, stories, events, and people that shape Santa Barbara

sbview.com

Milpas on the Move

By Sharon Byrne

Could There Be A Miracle On Milpas?

Y

ears ago, we had holiday lights on Milpas Street – big stars mounted on the light poles. The stars ran from upper Milpas down to the freeway, making the street festive and welcoming. Most of us thought the city put them up, and wondered why it no longer does. It turns out one businessman had made that generous gift to the community for years, and now is no longer able to.

Santos Guzman, owner of El Bajio, called me two weeks ago about getting the lights back up. Why doesn’t the city do it?

I had to explain the history and situation.

If we want lights up, we have to pay for it.

It was on us, the community, to make it happen.

Santos decided to put $1,000 on the table for the lights, and the challenge to Light Up The Night on Milpas Street was born. We called the company that put up the lights in years passed. We begged for a reduction in price. Instead of the $13,000+ they used to charge, they’d put up the lights, now a

little aged, for $9,000. Checking around, we discovered that this was a good price.

But wait, we also need sponsors for our holiday parade, which costs about $2,000 in insurance, permits, and cleanup fees. It features classic cars, kids from all over the city, and Santa in a big fire engine as the finale. It’s a big deal to the Milpas/Eastside community. We resurrected it last year, with new partners in the Boys & Girls Club and Casa De La Raza, and it was a hit.

To raise a combined $11,000 in funding for both the parade and lights… well, the financial challenge seemed overwhelming.

We reached out, and a spark ignited.

Livingreen would help, though a car had plowed into its showroom one week before.

Milpas Rental, El Potrillo and Tri-County Produce would match donated funds up to $4,000.

The dream suddenly seemed achievable!

Many businesses are open after 5pm, as people are heading out, or coming home, on Milpas. Wouldn’t the members of the community enjoy having a street lit up for the holidays as they run their evening errands or have dinner?

Rabobank and MarBorg stepped up to

Sharon Byrne

Sharon Byrne is executive director for the Milpas Community Association, and currently serves on the Advisory Boards for the Salvation Army Hospitality House and Santa Barbara County Alcohol and Drug Problems.

sbview.com Do miracles still happen?

Dare we hope for a Miracle On Milpas? If we see the return of the lighted stars to Milpas, it will be with heartfelt thanks to our wonderful Community Stars. be major sponsors. Santa Barbara Bikes, Specialty Plumbing, Santa Barbara Plumbing Supply, Mama Lu, AC Ramirez, Joyeria Latina, Alpha Thrift Store, Airtrix, Sam’s To Go, La Super-Rica, Giffin and Crane, Altamirano’s, and Los Amigos Café all joined in. These are all small businesses, many of them family owned. They are giving what they can to light up the night for the community.

What about corporations like Domino’s, Subway, Carl’s Jr, and others? McDonald’s, The Habit, and Marborg are generous sponsors, but they are also locally owned, and continually give to the community.

Rabobank, a tremendous community partner, is the major sponsor of the holiday parade and lights.

For the others, it’s a mixed lot. Some corporations have a policy of donating to one charity that may not be in the area. Some do in-kind donations, like food items, or bottled water for neighborhood cleanups. Some have a policy of not donating monetarily

to local community efforts, which seems totally counter-intuitive to good business practice. A company’s fortune often rises and falls with that of the neighborhood in which it operates, even if headquarters is in San Antonio, TX. Businesses generate revenues from our community, operate within it, employ residents, and benefit from efforts to improve the area. In short, the local community sustains them. If we get lights up on Milpas, the businesses would certainly benefit from a more welcoming street. They’d also sport posters in their windows proclaiming them a proud sponsor. Why not donate to locally based efforts that improve business environment?

It’s time to seriously re-examine the policy of not donating locally. After all, consumers can always freely choose to patronize only those businesses that support their community.

Many of their employees, being community-based, know this truth. KFC’s manager donated for the lights and parade out of her own pocket.

Will we raise the funds needed in time?

That is the $11,000 question. The lights would go up Thanksgiving Day, if we raise the money by Wednesday. Thanks to incredible outreach by Tri-County Produce’s John Dixon, board members of Casa Esperanza are pitching in to help get the lights up.

Franklin Elementary School enthusiastically raised funds to help out, with Principal Casie Kilgore leading the charge.

Now that’s some community spirit!

If you want to help, call (805) 636-0475, or go to www.mcasb.org.

SoCal Monopoly Headlock

By Loretta Redd

T

wo and a half months ago, I succumbed to the legislatively approved blackmail from the California Public Utilities Commission and allowed Southern California Edison to install a ‘Smart Meter’ at my home.

Coinciding with this installation was my acceptance of a full-time position as an interim director of a local non-profit.

I mention this because it means that I am away from my home, using little or no electricity, from roughly 7:30am until 6pm.

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...continued from 5 Loretta Redd’s diverse background includes being a psychologist, business owner, non-profit director, Air Force officer, writer, speaker, and executive coach. Loretta has served on several Santa Barbara city committees and has been a candidate for public office.

about halfway completed at this point. (The plan itself looks out twenty years and forecasts all sorts of stuff. Probably pretty reliable.) We lost track of all the acronyms and committees and agencies that are involved. CEQA, NEMA, SBCAG (YAWN). We tried to count the number of meetings and conferences that were being held but it was impossible.

It was impossible because we actually nodded off at one point. (We refuse to name any names but, trust us, we weren’t alone.)

The Lobotomy Has Taken

Loretta Redd

sbview.com

When I am home, neither I nor my two cats engage in very much electrical usage.

They tend to wear the fur coats that god provided, and I tend to either slip on a sweater, or shorts and flip-flops (this is Santa Barbara, so it might be both in one day). Having lived in a household as a child where “turn off the lights” was a common parental refrain, I am trained in the art of flipping off a switch as I exit the room.

My point is that I don’t use much electricity... or at least I didn’t until Mr. Smart Meter arrived. Apparently, the cats are having parties while I’m at the office, and running the air conditioner sufficiently to keep snow from melting.

Noting the timing of the Smart Meter installation, and the increase in my bill, I wrote a rather curt note on the invoice along with my check.

Within two days, I received a message at my home from an Edison representative, asking me to please call her to discuss my “complaint.” I felt a little embarrassed... not by the tone of my note, but that someone was taking the time to actually follow up on a rather paltry increase. But I did call back.

On the next day, I received a letter from the PUC’s Consumer Affairs Branch, saying they were in the process of investigating my complaint. In part: “...As part of our review, we directly require Southern California Edison Company to provide us with information about your account. We then review your complaint and the information from Southern California Edison Company to ensure that they are following the rules and regulations of the California Public Utilities Commission. After completing our investigation, we will contact you and let you know what we find...”

This review, they stated, will take about a month. Dear lord, that will probably add to the cost of electrical usage in California.

Staff must be hired in order to call me at home, write me letters, follow up on my bill, investigate my oven usage, and otherwise James Bond my “inquiry.” I was really feeling guilty about wasting their time and money.

Or I was, at least, until I investigated their Return on Equity (ROE) profit margin, and checked out where their income goes, like the (Compensation for their senior executives, for example.) Now, I do not begrudge Smart People getting paid well, even if Smart Meters seem to be funding it all. I want companies to thrive, even Public Utility Companies, who are regulated and policed supposedly by their State Commissioners. If they don’t thrive, then you end up with a disastrous lack of response and capacity, as evidenced in the northeast after hurricane Sandy.

The Santa Barbara Holiday Tree will be installed at the intersection of Victoria and State streets on November 28 thanks to So Cal Edison

I was unprepared for the magnitude of some of the finances... Profit to shareholders in 2012 was $975 million. So Cal Edison is asking for an 11.1% ROE for 2013. By comparison, Portland Energy has never received more than 8.75.

Mark Pocta, a manager for an independent branch of the Public Utilities Commission that advocates for consumers, states that California is one of the highest rates of returns in the nation.

Edison blames our regulations, saying they make it difficult for the company to stay competitive. “SCE’s request (11.1%) is slightly higher because we face slightly greater challenges,” testified Paul Hunt, director of finances and economics at Edison. He argued that “SCE is in the middle of a multi-year project to expand and strengthen its power grid to continue serving its customers reliably.”

I’m not feeling too sorry for this utility company, who pretty much has a monopoly on the market, with the parent company, Edison International (EIX), enjoying an earnings increase of 27% in 2010.

At the same time, senior executives received a bungee jump in compensation as well. Theodore Craver, Jr., Chair, President and CEO of Edison International was paid $6,770,345 in combined income, and the CEO of the Southern California Edison was paid another $5,997,103. Combined vice-presidential compensation for the two groups came in at another two million dollars.

Mark Pocta notes that if the California Public Utilities Commission were to accept his advocacy’s proposal of 8.75%, rather than the requested 11.1%, it would save customers $200 million annually.

Reducing it down to just 10% would save customers $100 million annually, which might be sufficient to at least cover the senior executive compensation packages.

As monopolies go, they have me in a headlock. If my monthly cost continues to rise, I’ll call the nice people at the Consumer Affairs Branch, (800-649-7570) to chat about the bill. On the other hand, if my rate increase isn’t just an anomaly, at least Edison is able to afford $35,000 for Santa Barbara’s Holiday Tree this year.

After the Airport Department (mercifully) finished, the meeting turned to a construction bid fight between a couple contracting companies. Both sides really wanted to get into the details of their bids and bid processes despite a staff recommendation rejecting the challenge.

(Our take, by the way, was that the whole thing was ill-advised since the Council was likely to rely on the Staff Recommendation anyway, but apparently others thought differently.)

It didn’t matter. (To us, anyway.) We’d been bored into total and complete apathy. We couldn’t stand it any longer.

And after around ten minutes of discussion of the nuances of Caltrans’ bid processes (among other ridiculously bureaucratic issues), the non-surgical lobotomy was complete.

We stood up collectively, dazed and confused, and staggered out of City Hall in the direction of our car.

That’s when we realized that we’d been screwed too. We’d been issued a parking ticket by the City for parking on De La Guerra for over 75 minutes.

We knew we should have skipped that damned proclamation.

Note that we don’t mean to bash the City Council here. It’s just wild to see the whole local government thing go down. And when one thinks of the number of city councils and county boards and state agencies and related committees and organizations and associations and firms and their agendas and plans and all the meetings and conferences and retreats and everything else that comes along with all that, one quickly understands that there is an entire economy based on this stuff, whole industries committed solely to the task of meeting and talking about what is best for the masses. Ad nauseum.

And they are all on the payroll. And we taxpayers are paying them.

It’s staggering when you think about it. No, it’s stupefying.

Especially to a newly lobotomized crew.

Business Beat

By Ray Estrada

Fed Okays SB Bank & Trust’s Acquisition

E

ven though it may owe the federal government $60 million, UnionBanCal Corp., the holding company of Union Bank NA, has received approval from the Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System and the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency for its purchase of the parent company of Santa Barbara Bank & Trust, officials reported this week.

This follows the Japan Financial Services Agency’s clearance of the transaction announced March 12. UnionBanCal expects the legal closing date to be Dec. 1.

Union Bank spokesmen had no immediate response to the report Thursday, nor did the office of U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein, D-Calif., who said in May that Pacific Capital Bancorp, SBB&T’s parent, will be forced to repay the one-third of the $180 million in bailout funds it was given three years ago.

During an appearance in Santa Barbara in May, Feinstein said all banks that were given Troubled Asset Recovery Program funds would be forced to pay them back to ease the national debt.

Actually, it was Texas billionaire banker Gerald Ford who plugged $500 million into Pacific Capital in 2010 and convinced the U.S. Treasury Department he would only have to pay back about two-thirds of the $180 million in TARP funds that the Santa Barbara-based company took from the taxpayers.

Ray Estrada

Ray Estrada is a writer, editor and media consultant who has worked for newspapers, radio news, wire services and online publications for the past 40 years. He has taught journalism at the University of Southern California and now runs his own consulting business based in Santa Barbara.

sbview.com

During the recession of 2008 and after a succession of bad real estate loans, Pacific Capital shed several hundred workers in an effort to shore up its sagging financials, although company officials never really admitted it. About a year after Ford’s executives took over, Union Bank offered to swallow up Pacific Capital for $1.5 billion and eventually discard the half-century old Santa Barbara Bank & Trust brand along with five other regional subsidiary banks.

Union Bank says it will add 45 branches along the Central Coast with the acquisition, which includes $3.7 billion in loans held for investment and $4.7 billion in deposits.

On completion of the acquisition, the registration of Pacific Capital’s common stock under the U.S. Securities Exchange Act of 1934 will be terminated and its stock will not be listed on any stock exchange or quotation system.

UnionBanCal Corp. is a wholly owned subsidiary of the Bank of TokyoMitsubishi UFJ Ltd, which is a subsidiary of Mitsubishi UFJ Financial Group Inc. Union Bank is a member of the Mitsubishi UFJ Financial Group.

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JOURNAL JIM

by James Buckley Jim founded the Montecito Journal some 17

years ago. He is an avid golfer who currently sports a 12.1 SCGA handicap index. His goal in life is to get that index into the single digits, even if for only a two-week period

The Holidays Begin at La Arcada

F

or some, the holiday season begins with Thanksgiving and the Friday after. For others, it’s the Santa Barbara Christmas Parade (due to take place this year on Friday, November 30, a full week after Black Friday). But, for many, the La Arcada Christmas Walk is the shopping kickoff day.

This year’s 18th Annual La Arcada Christmas Walk is scheduled for Wednesday, November 28, from 5pm to 8pm. Along with Santa’s special appearance in his sleigh (and the photo opportunities it sparks), you’ll hear the Santa Barbara Carolers featuring the dulcet tones of Kim Collins, and another group of strolling carolers called The Other Reindeer (dressed in Victorian garb); in front of Renaissance Debbie Denke will be caressing her keyboard while Dave Tolegian serenades with his saxophone; local librarian and jazz singer Nicole Lvoff, along with Randy Tico, and Woody DeMarco will be out on State Street at Figueroa offering up their musical

variations on the Christmas theme.

Santa will be in his sleigh, open to the world, throughout the evening, but his first visit is a very popular event; get there early so your kids can deliver their wish lists and you can get that Christmas card photo.

What makes La Arcada so special isn’t just that its two dozen stores are nestled in close proximity to one another in an extremely pedestrian-friendly setting festooned with twinkling lights while the smell of popping popcorn and warm cider wafts through the chilly evening air. No, what makes it even more special is what one doesn’t see or smell right away. For example, the Bud Bottoms sculptures of indigenous creatures like the Island Fox, hidden amongst the shrubbery, or the red-eared slider turtles that only come up to warm themselves on the rocks on sunny days. They are real and alive, despite their habit of staying perfectly still for extended periods of time.

Other attractions are the various works of art spotted throughout the small complex,

Lynn Adams (Santa Barbara Arts), Kathleen Cooper (Kathleen Cooper Fine Papers), Socorro Gomez (Socorro), Trini Quinn (La Arcada Bistro), Marisa Moran and Patrick Casey (State & Fig), Nicki Zuchawicz Horne (Peanuts Maternity & Kids), Birt and Charlotte Andersen (Andersen’s Bakery), Ralph Waterhouse (Waterhouse Gallery), Glenn Espig and Marilia Reibeiro (Oliver & Espig) are just some of the nearly two dozen merchants that will be offering their wares, libations, and expertise during the 18th Annual La Arcada Christmas Walk.

such as the “Nice To See You” sculpture depicting a window washer – one of three pieces by J. Seward Johnson, Jr. (of the Johnson Wax family). “Bob” is very lifelike, despite being made of bronze, as his clothes are painted, he’s wearing a blue baseball cap, and he has a book stuffed into his right rear pocket (the book, by the way, is Rear Window) as he directs his wiper blade against the storefront window. James “Bud”

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Talli Larrick heads up the super-efficient and friendly management office responsible for leasing and maintenance at La Arcada.

Bottoms’ sculptures are also prevalent; he designed the dolphin fountain at the Stearns Wharf end of State Street. At La Arcada, a bronze bench designed by Bottoms in the shape of a whale’s tail is surprisingly comfortable to sit upon.

“What’s fun about our sculptures,” suggests Talli Larrick, who manages the shopping area for La Arcada Investment Corporation, “is that children climb on them; they are very interactive, such as the life-size representation of Ben Franklin (in bronze) by George Lundeen.”

Hugh Petersen’s Treasure La Arcada, built on the site of what had been Our Lady of Sorrows Catholic Church, was designed and constructed under the supervision of architect Myron Hunt in 1926, less than a year after the big 1925 Santa Barbara earthquake that destroyed

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Among the two dozen shops in La Arcada is Lynn Adams’ “Made in the U.S.A.” and mostly in Santa Barbara County boutique called Santa Barbara Arts, in which local crafts people, artists, and authors sell their wares.

Delicious Desserts & Dinner. Extensive Wine & Beer List.

Among the unique items sold in all the one-of-a-kind shops and boutiques in La Arcada, such as Santa Barbara Arts, are those made by Lompoc-based jeweler Shelly Niro

the church. Mr. Hunt also designed the main portal and Faulkner Gallery in the Santa Barbara Museum of Art nearby, and designed the Rose Bowl, the RitzCarlton Huntington Hotel in Pasadena, the Huntington Library in San Marino, and many more elegant buildings.

Hugh Petersen, who passed away in 2003, bought the complex in 1972 and proceeded to make the changes one enjoys today, despite the many people back then that suggested he simply tear the buildings down and build something new.

“Mr. Petersen,” Talli explains, “would travel around all over the place, and when he found something he liked, he’d bring it back to Santa Barbara.”

It would take a full day to find and point out all the extra little touches Mr. Petersen added over the years, either purchased on one of his trips abroad, or simply ordered up for his and your amusement and enhancement.

For example, there is an Isinglass lamp that was one of the original electric lamps in the old Mission, a paneled Oak Room that had been Theodore Willard’s dining room (he created the Willard Electric Car), two crystal chandeliers that hung in the home of John Jacob Raskob, the man that built the Empire State Building; the free-standing four-sided clock that guards

the State Street entrance to La Arcada was designed by Lawrence Schneider, Tiffany’s head clocksmith. The giant “Intermezzo” sculpture at the north end of La Arcada was made in 1967 by British sculptor Sir Anthony Caro and installed in 1988.

Other hidden and not-so-hidden treasures include the Mozart Trio fountain, nearby all-brass elevator doors, a carousel horse from the 1890s, barber chairs from the same era, one of the oldest surviving original California mission bells, a ship’s cannon from a Spanish galleon circa 1741, and… well, you’ll just have to look for yourself.

Something else that separates La Arcada from other shopping areas is the large woodworking shop in the basement of the complex that until recently kept four fulltime carpenters on the payroll. All the elaborate mahogany doors one sees in the office complex above the shopping area were made in that workshop and are repaired on the premises.

The La Arcada Christmas Walk is sure to be crowded, but that crowd will likely be composed of folks full of holiday spirit and out to enjoy the exhilaration of rambling through the unique confines and one-of-akind stores at the newer than ever 85-yearold La Arcada.

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The Weekly Capitalist

by Jeff Harding

Jeff Harding publishes The Daily Capitalist, a blog on economics and finance. He is the president of Montecito Analytics, LLC, and is a real estate investor who lives in Montecito.

Sulking in Santa Barbara

I

’ve been sulking ever since the elections.

Just about everything and everyone I voted for lost. Locally, the opposition Republicans ran mostly bad candidates and lost everywhere. (But so did the Democrats and they won.) For the record, I am pro-fiscal sanity and pro-civil liberty.

The Republicans aren’t even pro-fiscal sanity anymore (they say the words, but…) and they are weak on civil liberty. The Democrats are fiscally clueless, but for the most part are pro-civil liberty.

To give you an example, I voted for Prop 34 to eliminate the death penalty. Yet my fellow Californians, mostly Democrats and mostly liberal, voted to keep the eye for an eye thing. This is despite evidence that it has no deterrent effect and there have been too many innocent people snuffed.

Whatever.

Nationally, the incumbent Obama won over a hapless Mitt Romney. Four more years… of stagnation, class warfare, and clueless economic policy. Not to mention the nationalization, in effect, of the health care industry. One of the better observations of the election was from liberal curmudgeon Jonathan Chait who noted that the 47% are actually the 51%.

See his recent piece in New York Magazine, “We Just Had a Class War (And One Side Won).” The “rich guy” lost.

Post election, it’s all very dreary. Obama continues to demand that rich people pay their fair share even though they already pay most of individual income taxes. The top 10% percent already pay about 60% of taxes; the top 25% pay 87%. The “bottom” 75% pay only 14% of taxes; the bottom

50% pay only 2.7%. So, to resolve our fiscal crisis, the rich are required to pay even more, yet the numbers show that Obama’s proposal only raises another $70 billion a year (per NY Times); a drop in the $1.1 trillion fiscal deficit bucket.

History has shown that you can only tax so much before the economy stagnates or tanks. This is the so called “Rahn Curve” calculation. That “so much” is much debated. Some economists say it’s 15% of GDP, others say it’s somewhere between 20% and 25%. According to most data we are already at that point (24% [OECD]; 26.9% [Heritage Foundation]).

This leads to some unpleasantness economically and politically. Here are some economic fundamentals. Government doesn’t create wealth. By this I mean that only individuals and businesses create wealth. Wealth is something tangible, like your labor, machinery, raw materials, consumer goods, and capital.

Money is just a way to get these things.

Government spends your wealth. You may think that’s okay because you get some of it: Obamacare, Medicare, Medicaid, AFDC, Social Security, Food Stamps.

Just remember someone has to pay for it.

And in order to pay for it, someone has to create wealth, and that someone is us, not government.

Here’s my point: the more government takes from the economy, the less wealth creators have to do their thing. At some level that burden becomes a drag on the economy. I say that is now.

So we have a situation where the economy is stagnating – slowest recovery

yet – and your government(s) want to take more money out of the economy to pay for things that the 51% want. I think you can start to see the formation of a feedback loop here: falling revenues plus increased government deficit spending requires more revenue to bail out the 51 percent’s economic hardship; the more they take, the more the economy stagnates and the more revenue is demanded by the government to help the needy. Etcetera.

Here is my second point: there is no political will to change this system that generates massive deficits. In other words, we are doomed.

Several weeks ago I listened to Messrs.

Simpson and Bowles at UCSB discuss their work on the National Commission on Fiscal Responsibility and Reform, the members of which were appointed by Congress. With all the common sense that these gentlemen displayed, the best they could do is cut the national debt by $118 billion per year.

That sounds impressive, but if you take the amount of national debt that was added on since the beginning of W. Bush’s second term (+$8.8 trillion) it would take about 75 years to get back to the 2004 debt level ($7.4 trillion). Not very effective.

We now have the Fiscal Cliff staring at us. Mandatory cuts in spending, including the military, and automatic tax increases.

Obama says we need to tax the rich in order to get a deal; Mr. Boehner says no new tax increases. Personally I don’t think we’ll get an agreement and instead they will do the politically expedient thing, which is to kick that can down the road by postponing any cuts and extending the Bush tax cuts.

The reality is that spending will never be seriously cut, taxes will never be seriously raised, and we’ll see deficits continue for a

long time. The public debt? It will never be cut.

What does that mean for us? Here is what will happen: Much debate in Congress will only yield superficial reforms.

The Fed will continue to monetize federal deficits by printing money.

Because of Fed money printing, more capital will be destroyed and long-term economic stagnation will result.

Federal spending will continue, deficits will weaken the dollar even more, and more capital will be taxed out of the economy and spent on things the government wants but which will not create any lasting positive economic impact (socalled “fiscal stimulus”).

Interest rates will remain at rock bottom levels while modest price inflation will eat away savers’ capital making them poorer. Add to that stagnation and this is what is called “going Japanese.”

Despite the Fed’s money pumping, money supply is now collapsing which will result in near term negative growth: we may already be seeing this, but it will probably take a few more months to impact the economy.

As a result, the Fed will be pressured to print money at an even greater rate which will further decay capital, stimulate financial assets, and lead to even more stagnation or recession.

It’s not good new folks, but it is reality though you may not wish to hear it. I believe Cassandra was killed because of her unpopular forecasts, but maybe she was Keynesian. Before you dismiss me as the village idiot, you should know that my macroeconomic forecasts have been very good.

This is why I sulk.

“The more government takes from the economy, the less wealth creators have to do their thing.”

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The More Things Change…

Treatment for...

By Hattie Beresford Former teacher and long-time resident of Santa

Barbara, Hattie Beresford writes a history column for the Montecito Journal and has contributed two Noticias to the Santa Barbara Historical Museum. In addition, she wrote supplemental text and co-edited My Santa Barbara Scrap Book: A Portrait of the Artist Elizabeth Eaton Burton.

Young People Enjoy Barbecue Amid Nooks in Franklin Canyon

Morning Press: Nov. 6, 1912. Twenty-five of Santa Barbara’s young men and women enjoyed one of the most delightful outings in their experience Sunday when they visited Franklin canyon and partook of a barbecued feast prepared by the experienced hands of Fred Lowe and Roscoe Seely. The trip to the canyon was made in a big auto truck, the floor of which was covered with hay. The young people gathered down town in the morning, all coming prepared to pass the entire day at the outing place.

On their arrival at the canyon, the young men, all armed with shovels, started the real work of the day. Five pits were dug and stones were placed in them and fires started. The meats were then placed in the pits, the young women meantime having spread cloths on the tables, laid out plates, knives and forks and decorated the centers with wild flowers plucked from the hillsides.

Following luncheon, the dishes were washed, the young couples then strolling away for short jaunts through the neighboring canyons and old caves.

The party left the canyon on their return trip about 5 o’clock, reaching this city before 6 o’clock.

The barbecue was given in honor of Miss Margaret De Armond, of Orland, who is visiting here…

A picnic excursion to Franklin Canyon in the 1910s (Courtesy Carpinteria Valley Museum of History)

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ranklin Canyon had been a popular excursion destination for Santa Barbarans for generations.

According to the late Jim Blakely, backcountry historian, there had been no trail up the canyon to cross the range until 1913. At that time, Carpinterians called for donations (subscriptions) to supplement the inadequate funds available by the national and county authorities to construct such a trail.

Franklin Canyon Trail in Carpinteria will celebrate its 100th year birthday next year with, hopefully, a reopening ceremony, for the trail has been closed for over thirty years. In January 2011, a group of people came together to form Possibly the Franklin Trail in 1910s (Courtesy Blakely family and Santa Barbara Historical Museum)

Friends of the Franklin Trail and worked closely with the Santa Barbara County Parks Department and the Land Trust for Santa Barbara County to secure rights of way from private owners and raise funds to construct a new trail to connect with the old Franklin Trail in the Los Padres National Forest.

They were amazingly successful in reaching their goal of $450,000 and hope to have all projects completed for a Summer 2013 opening.

(For more on the trail and the history of the backcountry, go to franklintrail.org and the three-part article by Roxie Grant Lapidus in the newsletter of the Carpinteria Valley Historical Society, The Grapevine.)

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record. The Dons will lose 11 seniors to graduation. Three of them – Evan Robertson, Nate Hunter and Mason Pereira – scored in their final game.

Presidio Sports is a provider of local sports news and information for the Santa Barbara community. Founded in 2008, the small team at Presidio has covered hundreds of local sporting events and published thousands of articles connected to Santa Barbara’s athletic community. Please visit their website for more local sports news and information.

SBART Athletes of the Week

Agoura takes CIF Water Polo Championship over Santa Barbara

Dos Pueblos’ Bryan Fernandez and SBCC’s Cecilia Instebo were named Santa Barbara Athletic Round Table Athletes of the Week at Monday’s weekly press luncheon held at Harry’s Plaza Café.

Both athletes are cross country runners coming off spectacular efforts in

By John Dvorak

By John Dvorak

Santa Barbara High’s boys water polo team settled for a runner-up finish in the CIF Division 2 Tournament.

SBCC’s Ceclia Instebo

I

RVINE – Agoura’s top-ranked boys water polo team won the program’s third straight CIF Championship on Saturday by defeating second-seeded Santa Barbara 7-4 in the Division 2 title match played at the William Woollett Aquatics Center in Irvine.

The Chargers’ Szabolcs Magyari caught fire and scored a game-high five goals for Agoura, whose junior goalie Dominick Beaudine held the Dons in check on the other side of the pool.

“Their goalie played good – he played great actually – I don’t know how many saves he had but it seemed like he got to a lot of corners. That was the difference,” said Dons head coach Mark Walsh.

Beaudine and the Chargers defense allowed just 17 goals in four playoff victories.

“We usually score about ten goals a game so their defense was great,” Walsh said.

Beaudine collected 12 saves in a championship performance. The Chargers had allowed just three goals before Santa Barbara’s Spencer Smith scored with 15 seconds remaining.

“We had a saying actually, earlier in the year, we came up with this little catchy rhyme thing that says ‘defend till the end,’” Beaudine said. “Both meanings, in the water and also as defending champs from division 4, so we really came together each one of us.”

The Chargers (27-5) won CIF titles in Division 4 in 2010 and 2011 before moving up to Division 2 this season. Agoura was ranked No. 1 from preseason to the finish line.

Dos Pueblos’ Bryan Fernandez

“For me, it was really rewarding to see her cap off such an amazing season with another great performance and about a fifteensecond PR,” said Fickerson.

Weekend Sports Calendar Santa Barbara High goalie Gio Goggia stretches out to stop a shot by Agoura in front of Dons defenders Evan Robertson (3) and Preston Schlagel (2).

“Just winning in general feels pretty good, especially for us as a team, all our hard work finally paying off,” Beaudine said. ”It’s a wonderful feeling. I mean, a lot of people don’t get a chance to feel this and those that do really have to enjoy it because it’s something else.”

Agoura never trailed at any point in the match and led by at least three goals throughout the second half. The situation would have been much different if not for a three-minute stretch in the second quarter when Agoura packed in four quick goals.

Three came from Magyari.

“This was the only outcome that was possible,” Magyari said. “The amount of work that we put in, and the game-plan was just unbeatable.”

Santa Barbara, the Channel League champion, finishes its season with a 22-9

championship races on Saturday.

Fernandez won an individual CIF title – the first in Dos Pueblos’ history – in the Division 2 race at Mt. SAC. Running on Mt. SAC’s shorter (2.96-mile) rainsoaked course, he won in 14:06, edging out Austin Goins of Canyon-Anaheim and Garrett Corcoran of Villa Park by two seconds. The Charger senior is 9-0 in races this season.

Instebo came through with her best race of the season at the junior college State Championships, placing second overall.

“It was really great to see her, just every week as the competitions got better, raise her game and go after it,” said Vaqueros cross country coach Scott Fickerson.

Instebo covered the 5K course at Woodward Park in Fresno in a season-best 18:14.

By Barry Punzal

Bryan Fernandez elevated his running to another level during the summer before his senior year, and the hard work he put in and the knowledge he gained during the offseason has paid off in a big way.

Last weekend, as noted above, Fernandez became Dos Pueblos High’s first CIF Southern Section individual cross country champion. On Saturday, he will attempt to win an individual state title and help the Chargers claim a Division 2 team crown at the CIF State Championships at Fresno’s Woodward Park.

The other members of the boys team are Max Davis, Andrew McGuan, John Greening, Cole Smith, Ben York and Tyler Bradford.

DP’s Addi Zerrenner also will be running for an individual state title in the Division 2 girls competition at Fresno.

After finishing a successful track season

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Dos Pueblos’ boys cross country team is competing for a State Championship this weekend after winning the Southern Section CIF title last Saturday at Mt. SAC.

last spring (third place in the Division 2 3200 final), Fernandez headed into the summer looking to raise his game. He hooked up with former DP teammate Sergey Sushchikh, who is now running cross country and track at UCLA. “I was training with Sergey every day,” Fernandez said. “He showed me how he trained in college, his diet, everything like that. It really changed my outlook on how to train for these races and prepare for them.”

The results speak for themselves.

Fernandez is undefeated in 10 races this season, including victories in big invitationals like Woodbridge, Clovis and Mt. SAC and in the postseason events, the CIF-SS Prelims and Finals.

“This has definitely been better than expected,” he said of his senior season. “I came into the season definitely expecting to run for a CIF championship and going

to the state meet. But, I didn’t expect to be undefeated and running all these times I’ve been running on all these historic courses in California.”

At the CIF State Meet, he’ll be running on a 5,000-meter course that has hard-packed dirt trails with some grass and asphalt, a few mild up-and-down rolling hills and one steep short hill.

Fernandez has experience running the course, most recently in early October in the Clovis Invitational, where he covered the course in 15:09.

“I finally figured that course for the first time in three years, and I feel pretty good going into this weekend,” he said.

His fastest meet time this season is 14:09 on the flat three-mile course at the Seaside Invitational in Ventura.

Fernandez was a talented sophomore on the 2010 DP team that finished 10th in

The Chargers are led by individual CIF-ss champion Bryan Fernandez.

the state meet. He placed 55th that year.

Sushchikh took fifth.

When he started running cross country as a freshman, he said his goal was to keep up with Sushchikh.

“He was a big junior and running all fast. I never really thought about state and national level.”

Now, Fernandez is the man.

He expects his toughest competition on Saturday will come from Steven Fahy of La Costa Canyon, the San Diego Section Division 2 champion, Austin Goins of Canyon-Anaheim and Garrett Corcoran of Villa Park, who finished two seconds behind Fernandez in the Southern Section

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Division 2 finals.

The Chargers and Zerrenner will be looking to bounce back from off days at the sectional finals. The boys team, ranked No. 1 in Division 2, finished fifth. Zerrenner, the top-ranked girl in the division, placed third. Zerrenner placed 10th at last year’s state championships.

Events worth checking out this weekend: FRIDAY High School Football: CIF-SS Northwest Division Semifinals, Bishop Diego at North Torrance, 7pm. The top-seeded Cardinals (12-0) have reached the final four for the second straight year. They face a team that has size and speed. In North’s quarterfinal win over Gladstone last Friday, reserve running back Corey Cox rushed for 121 yards and a touchdown on nine carries and caught two passes for 76 yards and another score. Bishop’s defense picked off four passes and recovered a fumble in its quarterfinal win over Village Christian.

Women’s volleyball: Long Beach State at UCSB, 7 pm. The Gauchos (15-16, 8-8) look to finish the season with a winning record – they haven’t had a losing season since 2008. They play host to UC Irvine on Saturday.

Men’s water polo: UCSB vs. USC at MPSF Tournament. The Gauchos have the unenviable task of playing the fourtime defending national champions in the opening round of the conference tournament at USC. SATURDAY Women’s basketball: Cal State San Marcos at Westmont, 3 pm. The NAIA No. 7-ranked Warriors return home after a four-game road trip.

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Plan B

by Briana Westmacott Hailing from NorCal, Briana has lived in Santa Bar-

bara for the past fifteen years. While she is indeed an adjunct faculty member at SBCC and has contributed to LOVEmikana, Wake & Wander and Entrée Magazine, much of her time is spent multi-tasking her way through days as a mother, wife, sister, wantto-be chef and travel junky. Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability… usually.

Gross National Happiness Confessions of a Crazed Consumer

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ou’ve already heard it, I know you have, the faint tune of Christmas carols playing in the background at your local market or Starbucks. It happens fast, basically once we loosen our belts from Thanksgiving. Advertisers begin their assault with clever marketing and deals blatantly meant to convince us to buy, buy, BUY! It’s Black Friday. (Spend.) Twenty shopping days until Christmas. (Spend.) Decorate your tree, your house, your lawn. (Spend, spend, spend.)

It just doesn’t end.

Admittedly, I personally am completely guilty of participating fully in the holiday madness. I overeat on Thanksgiving each year and then proceed to shop my way through December. Shop for my kids. Shop for my family. Shop for my friends. Shop for my husband (although he always begs me not to). And, sprinkled in all of those trips to the mall, I end up shopping for myself too. Why? Because I fall for the gimmicks and the glamour. And after all is said and done, I don’t feel good about it – especially once I check the bank account.

But this year it is going to be different. I’ve learned from the past. This year, I’m going to take control of the holidays with a different game plan; I am not going to lose control of the reins as I navigate the shops and the malls and the presents and the cards and the holiday parties. My new approach is simple.

It is literally simplicity. My inspiration?

The country of Bhutan and its (quite wonderful) concept of Gross National Happiness. (I love the sound of that.)

The Bhutanese Are On To Something Bhutan – officially the Kingdom of Bhutan – is a landlocked state located at the

preventive

|

Family + nature + love = true happiness.

Balance at the top of Cold Spring Trail – and nowhere around to buy anything.

eastern end of the Himalayas. It is bordered to the north by China and to the south, east and west by India. So why in the world am I linking Bhutan to my shopping addictions and holiday madness? Because people in Bhutan do not over-consume. They find peace and happiness in meditation and the surrounding elements of nature. And they have an entire section of their government devoted to measuring their Gross National Happiness. Not a bad perspective.

Bhutan’s Gross National Happiness is measured by how well the natural environment is supporting the people and how comfortable the people are within their families and communities. My thought is that, if I focus on Bhutan’s way of life, I could possibly become more enlightened (instead of getting an enormous credit card bill in January). Genius.

Bhutanese people are Buddhist, and the entire population of the country is approximately the same as the city of San Francisco. They just legalized television

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and the Internet for the first time in 1999.

I’d like to blame my impulsive actions and addictions on all the technological advancements that surround me. I’d like to believe if I didn’t know it all existed, then I wouldn’t be out there scooping it all up – but I’m not so sure about that.

I’m just a sucker for the ads and the deals.

I glance over at that sweet cashmere sweater that is marked down from its original price and think, “Gosh, I really need that in my closet.” Then, BAM! I’ve bought it and I don’t look back (until that credit card bill, anyway). My neighbor throws up an extra train of candy canes on the lawn and BAM! I’m headed to Home Depot to spruce up our front walkway too.

Not this year, though, I swear. (Sorry neighbors, but if you see me practicing my downward-facing dog on the front lawn, it’s only in an effort to calm my mind and body in order to deter myself from my candy cane and cashmere purchases.)

Breeding Consumers It’s terrible to say, however, that I already feel somewhat doomed because the fact is that I breed shoppers. That fact became crystal clear when one of my daughters declared that her ultimate favorite excursion is to Nordstrom’s. (My husband went pale – literally – when these words spilled out of her 5-year-old mouth). I tried to make us all feel better by explaining that it was simply the escalator that Ellie enjoyed, however two years have passed and she still begs to go “shopping at her favorite store.” And, to top it all off, I write a weekly style column and typically end up purchasing half the goods I’m writing about. (Maybe doomed is an understatement.)

But this year, this year, is different. I’m going to escape it all, turn a blind eye, hone in on my focus during moments of

weakness.

Like the Bhutanese.

Talk about focus, Bhutan is known to have a large amount of marijuana that grows wild – completely wild – throughout the country. It is also well known that the only living things that enjoy the wild weed are the pigs. (This would likely provide for an interesting version of Crime Time.) In other words, the Bhutanese are surrounded by temptation – if you’re into that sort of thing, I guess – and yet no one, except for the hogs, partakes. So I really should be able to avoid the urge to throw in a nice new pair of boots as a reward for all my holiday work.

Right?

How will I accomplish my newfound plan without turning into a Grinch? Like I said before, it’s simple.

Have another glass of wine with the family and skip camping out at Best Buy (okay, I’ve never really camped there).

Cherish stories from my loved ones and forget about challenging my wallet at the outlets. Better yet, I’ll start saving for a trek to Bhutan where I can submerge my psyche into a culture that, to date, seemingly avoids consumer chaos and provides an alternate vision of what is truly important in life.

In the meantime, though, I’d better keep practicing my down-dog on the front lawn.

Be safe out there friends, no human trampling for Black Friday bargains. And hey, rather than yearning for all those things you don’t have this year, be thankful for what you’ve got… my guess is that it’s a lot.

Briana’s Best Bets Hike it Off

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rab your boots and hit the trail this week. It’s the perfect way to get rid of that extra turkey and pie that you ate. Some of my favorites are below.

Inspiration Point – It’s about an hour and a half to the top and back and the uphill will give you a good sweat.

Cold Spring Trail – Stunning views and scenery will be sure to keep you trekking along.

Parma Park – A forgotten gem (and fabulous for dogs) with ocean views and more sunshine than most trails.

Shhh, Let’s Quiet the Mind

I

t’s over a week away, and that gives you plenty of time to schedule this class into your holiday calendar. The Mahakankala Buddhist Center in Santa Barbara is dedicating a morning of meditation to “Escaping Holiday Stress.” On Saturday, December 8, from 9am – 12pm, American Buddhist Monk Kelsang Wangpo will lead a class of short meditations appropriate for all levels of practice. No experience needed. $20/person. (Look for me and say hello – when our silence is done; I will be perched in the back pretending to know what I’m doing.)

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WINE & DINE

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WEEKEND GUIDE

19

by

• LOVE IS FREE What: Where: .com

Gifted Chocolates

When: Why:

By Alexis Wiseley

How:

Take a Hike The McMenemy Trail in Montecito.

(See www.santabarbarahikes.com for directions.)

Friday, Saturday or Sunday.

We imagine you’re feeling a bit gluttonous from a holiday full of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and multiple slices of pie.

Walk, jog, run.

What’ll It Cost Me: Free!

• LOOSE CHANGE What: Where:

When: Why:

How:

What’ll It Cost Me: Ride + food = approximately $30

Chocolats du CaliBressan’s J’adore Chocolate Club makes a perfect gift for the chocoholic in your life. (Photo Credit: Halberg Photographers)

Y

ou’re a part of a local wine club, the Santa Barbara Bowl concert club and, who knows, maybe even a popcorn of the month club. What’s missing? A chocolate club, of course! And guess what? You can now be a part of one of those, too. Chocolats du CaliBressan – Santa Barbara’s dreamy French-inspired Chocolatier – is melting our hearts with its new J’adore Chocolate Club.

By joining the candy-coated club, you’ll get five delectable shipments per year, keeping your sweet tooth on the up-and-up.

Each shipment will contain an assortment of Santa Barbara-made bonbons and

truffles, including special seasonal selections and a bonus chocolate surprise. We’re currently in a Coconut Curry, Champagne and Cardamom Truffle coma just imagining the sweet surprises that will soon show up at our door.

The next shipment comes just in time for Christmas. Dare we say you do something sweet for yourself? (Or maybe even for your favorite chocoholic?)

Either way, just go join the J’adore Chocolate Club. It will pair perfectly with your wine club membership.

Go to www.chococalibressan.com/jadorechocolate-club for details.

Do Breakfast in Carpinteria by Train Sly’s (weekend brunch = yum), Beach Liquor (we hear they have the best breakfast burritos), Crush Café (you can crush on a meal or a cupcake), or Esau’s Café (simple diner-style and dee-lish).

Anytime Saturday or Sunday will do.

Because it’s something different. And if you go on Saturday, you have a shot at seeing Santa at Carp’s 32nd Annual Holiday Faire at the Historical Museum.

Take the train. Hop on board at the Santa Barbara station. Trains depart at 6:43am and 9:26am.

• HEY BIG SPENDER What: Where: When: Why: How:

Shop till you Drop!

Chapala & Parker, 350 Chapala Street Black Friday (November 23rd), 10am – 6pm Sip mimosas and enjoy 15% – 70% off all merchandise (clothing, shoes, accessories, jewels and more!)

Shop till you drop! And get entered to win a $100 gift certificate.

What’ll It Cost Me: Shop for your sister, your BFF, your mom, yourself...

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“We were gathered that night... a collective... a force.

The compassion displayed: the impetus to the fulfillment of a thousand of wishes... set into motion”

Special thanks to our dream families.

It took a community of dream makers.

Thank you to the countless businesses, individuals and volunteers who gave time and love to support the 11th Annual Celebration of Dreams event on November 16.

This year was about celebrating the families we serve. We are most proud the event provided a true integration of our dreamers and their stories. The dream families who were present that night, left feeling the love of our dream community as they returned to their personal journeys with illness.

Once again this year, Charity Navigator has awarded Dream Foundation a 4-star rating for sound fiscal management.

Why this is important to us? Because when you show your compassion to help those in need, you can rest assured we will honor and maximize your investment.

Though our event is over, our mission and service demands never stop. This time of year, applications pour in for things as basic as a Christmas tree or a water heater to a final family reunion, allowing loved ones to create cherished memories.

We made our budget for this event. We also maintained the national “gold” standard percentage of funds raised vs. event costs, due to the help of sponsorships, contributions and a tremendous amount of in-kind donations.

Our Celebration of Dreams event can only accommodate a limited number of people; however, our mission reaches far and wide—within our community and beyond—with services that profoundly enhance the quality of life for individuals and families when it is needed most. This is ultimately what this event is about, and who we are as an organization.

Please follow this link where we recognize individuals and companies who made dreams come true: www.dreamfoundation.org/event-thank-you.html

Thank you to all of you who give. Every gesture is huge to us when it comes from the heart. Our entire team feels deep gratitude to those who make our service possible.

Thanksgiving Blessings from the Chairs, Boards and everyone at Dream Foundation...

The mission of Dream Foundation is to enhance the quality of life for individuals and their families facing a life-threatening illness by fulfilling a heart’s final wish.

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...continued from 8

Holiday Traditions....

(Now published) poet Phil Brock enjoys his moment at the pagoda. Nice work, Phil, you have at least two fans.

collection and the writings. It was great, a real cultural treat right here in SB. But it’s not all about simply appreciating the art. That’s the beauty of the Atelier events.

There was amazing Chinese music played on centuries-old instruments, there was traditional Chinese dance, there were brush artists painting landscapes in real time, and there was a (wonderful) Chinese wine tasting.

And there was poetry.

Guests were given the opportunity to be inspired by the whole scene and to write their inspiration on a card. Then, toward the end of the experience, a man in a small pagoda was available to read aloud willing guests’ poems, and offer a small cup of wine to celebrate them.

We stood near the pagoda for some time, listening and enjoying what can only be described as diverse offerings. Eventually we heard our favorite, which follows: Mist crawling up eroded ridges of vegetation.

The careless winds pushed the quiet cloud.

Submerged below the moon, a moist star glistens.

If you blame someone else: Confucius said.

–Phil Brock Go ahead, chew on that for a while. I dare you.

I’m Into Rice Wine and Cajun Beer Too We wandered the galleries a bit more, soaking it all in. Then we tasted a few Chinese rice wines – absolutely delicious, by the way, try one next time you visit China Palace – and hit the road.

(We actually had a late dinner at The Palace, which we hadn’t done for some time. It was delicious, all the way from the muffins and Dixie beers to the gumbo and étouffée and bread pudding soufflé.

Thanks Errol and Karen and Jessica (and everybody else), we had a great time and will be back soon.)

Stuff I Like

First, the annual La Arcada Christmas Walk is going to happen on Wednesday, November 28, from 5-8pm. This really is the holiday kick-off party around town, and it is a great way to get out and see some friends and neighbors – not to mention old St. Nick. There’s lots to do (and eat and drink) so bring the whole family down for

Even Santa Barbara Zoo’s latest arrivals, lionesses Kadi (near) and Neema (far), are enjoying the Santa Barbara autumn. They are visiting from New Zealand for one reason: To mate with resident male, Chadwick, who will clearly soon be enjoying all SB has to offer – if he isn’t already (photo: Sheri Horiszny).

some caroling and shopping and holiday fun. Read Journal Jim’s piece this week for more details.

But don’t stop there! On Friday, November 30, at 6:30pm, the Santa Barbara Downtown Organization will start the 60th Annual Downtown Holiday Parade (they still need volunteers!) by having the Holiday Prince and Fairy light the Community Holiday Tree that is soon to be installed on State Street just above Victoria. Then stick around for the parade and boost your spirit for the season. Should be fun.

Finally, the Santa Barbara Botanic Garden is looking for a few good elves this year to participate in its Holiday Family Craft Nature Craft Workshop on Saturday, December 15, from 10am–noon, in the Garden Courtyard. Come fashion wreaths, ornaments, wrapping paper and more from materials gathered only from nature.

And have some hot cider and cookies too.

Members pay just $10/adults and $5/kids, and nonmembers only $15/adults and $7/ kids. You’ll come out with some cool gifts (or decorations for your own place), so I say have at it. Call 805.682.4726 (ext. 102) to register.

Like I said above, this is a great time of year to be around town. It’s the holidays, my friends, so get out there and have some fun. I know I will.

(Oh, and the next Atelier at SBMA event doesn’t happen until April 12, 2013, so you have some time to research and plan it. I’ll definitely be there.)

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22 | N OV E M B E R

23 – 30 | 2012

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M Deputy Sorenson deciphers a heavily tagged wall on Magnolia Avenue.

by Jana Mackin

A journalist and a poet, Jana has lived everywhere from New Orleans and Butte, Montana to Saudi Arabia, where she taught English to children.

Her articles have appeared in numerous publications, including The Washington Post and San Francisco Examiner. She now lives in Goleta.

Goleta Five-0

Walking the Beat with Goleta Senior Deputy Greg Sorenson

I

’ve heard the measure of a man is to walk a mile in his shoes. Well, I recently did just that with Senior Deputy Greg Sorensen, and my time with him confirmed what I suspected immediately when we met on a late October afternoon at Goleta Old Town Sheriff’s Office.

Good cop.

Frankly, he should be. Deputy Sorenson is a “community resource deputy” for the Goleta Division of the County Sheriff’s Office, and he’s quite an asset to the neighborhood.

“My job description is entirely in my title,” he said, “I’m a liaison for people and law enforcement for the city of Goleta. And even though I only spend about ten percent of my time walking or riding a beat, I feel it is one of the most important aspects of the job. It helps me to be on eye level with others on the street. It’s a personal touch.”

It’s clear that such a “personal touch” is important for law enforcement. And it is perhaps especially important for Deputy Sorensen, whose duties include Neighborhood Watch, Business Watch, Graffiti Abatement and Adopt-a-School programs. He also deals with homeless issues and community outreach, and does a reasonable amount of public speaking (e.g., giving business safety talks and warning the elderly about scams).

“We have a very eclectic, very diverse population. What I would like to be is more of a presence, a face,” said Sorenson. “When people see a deputy face-to-face as opposed to in a black and white car driving up and down Hollister, it projects a more positive, more accessible image.”

In this case, it’s much more than an image; Deputy Sorenson is nothing if not actually positive and accessible.

On Patrol We spent an hour and a half patrolling – I walked and he rode a bike… slowly – an Old Town route from the Sheriff’s Office on Hollister up to Nectarine Park, then to the end of Magnolia Avenue and back again. While only about a mile in distance, the route encompasses a broad spectrum of urban and law enforcement challenges: homelessness, gangs, graffiti and dumping, as well as the full panoply of senior, youth and low-income issues.

It’s not child’s play out here, and as we walk/ride, I noticed that Deputy Sorenson wears a bulletproof vest under his sheriff’s shirt. He rides a police Rockhopper bicycle modified with lights, sirens and police stickers. On his belt is a holstered Heckler

Magnolia Avenue Dumping Ground

Goleta resident Miss Celia Lee, 67, personifies community policing by keeping an eye on Old Town’s streets and spending time talking with Deputy Sorenson.

& Koch, 40 caliber, semi-automatic pistol.

He also has a cell phone, handcuffs, pepper spray and taser, among other standard gear.

In his saddlebag, he carries cite books, stickers, snacks, and extra paperwork.

Besides his uniform, he wears gloves, bike helmet and shades.

He’s ready for most anything.

(I wear my “One Tough Chick” cap, and am packing a notepad and camera. So am I.)

Protecting the Park Nectarine Park is tucked away, a playtime sanctuary for mothers and young children. After making some small talk with Guadalupe Simon, 12 (she wants to be a pediatrician), and Briana Basulto, also 12 (she wants to be a pastry chef ), Deputy Sorenson suddenly frowned and excused himself, politely, from the conversation.

“Who wrote this?” he asked aloud, not talking to anyone in particular, motioning to a metal bench covered in graffiti, “who?”

I saw a genuine concern in his face.

“This is new,” he continued, “they cleaned it up. It used to be really bad. Kids would come out and hang in back when there was no light. Now they’ve got a light in back.

That helps.”

As we walked around the park conducting interviews and taking photographs to chronicle the new graffiti, I got a chance to see Deputy Sorenson’s aforementioned accessibility and positive impact first hand.

“It’s good to see the police here,” Leti Brze told me, motioning toward her toddler, “the kids can play.” Then she glanced at the graffiti-covered bench and said, “it’s too bad, the park doesn’t look so nice when they do that. It looks like jail or something.”

“We didn’t know about this, nobody told us,” Deputy Sorenson said tersely, “that’s really bad.”

We had come upon an urban dumping ground at the dead end of Magnolia Avenue, next to the railroad tracks and adjacent to a cinder block wall covered in gang tags, graffiti and profanity. The entire area is littered with seedy stained mattresses, stinky rags and clothes, discarded doors and furniture, garbage, cans of old paint and other refuse of discarded lives. It smells. Unfortunately, this blight sits at the intersection of pressing Old Town issues: homelessness and gangs and an associated culture of fear, violence and intimidation.

As I stared at the makeshift mural of graffiti, Deputy Sorenson deciphered gang hieroglyphs for me.

“Varrio Goleta Projects 13,” he reported, pointing to the VGP 13 graffiti. This same graffiti, I learned, also keeps appearing on the side of a local man’s grey van, despite continuous repainting efforts. (The victim of this “victimless” crime refused to tell me his name for fear of gang retaliation.)

“Some people are afraid that law

enforcement will turn them into immigration,” Deputy Sorenson told me later. “And if they report anything, they’re afraid of retribution. Part of my goal is to let people know that we are not out to get them, but be an asset for them.”

The White Sheep Lives to Fight Crime Another Day “I’m a ‘white sheep,’ the only one in my family in law enforcement,” said Sorenson, an ex-Marine, now 47. “I came into this profession a little bit later in life and being a cop really solidified what I already believed to be true, that people for the most part are generally good. That’s the ninety percent.

Unfortunately, we in law enforcement deal mostly with those who are the other ten percent of society; those that prey on others.”

(That’s pretty well put.)

“I can’t take on the whole world,” sighed Sorenson, “only my part of it.”

(So is that.)

Thanks so much for your time and effort, Deputy Sorensen, you and your mix of integrity, professionalism and community are just what Goleta needs. In fact, it is what the Good Land is all about.

See you on the beat again soon.

Goleta Girl’s Picks Recycled Cork Craft Celebration Has your Christmas spirit taken a powder? Your creativity tanked? The Goleta Library can jump start you into the holiday season with its Recycled Cork Craft Celebration – an adult craft workshop featuring recycled craft programs using cork. Participants are invited to make multiple cork crafts, including a Christmas tree. Or just bring things from around the house that you would like to cork: wooden letters, trivets, shadow boxes, flat wooden wreaths, wooden balls, etc.

The library supplies the corks, glue guns and glue, ribbons and other art materials, and the program is slated for Saturday, December 1, from 3 to 4pm, at 500 North Fairview Avenue. For preregistration call 805-964-7878, or visit www.SBPLibrary. org. The whole thing is free and open to the public.

Goleta Valley Community Orchestra Get away from the boob-tube for awhile and take the family to listen to some inspiring music. The Goleta Valley Community Orchestra, under the direction of Laurel Fryer, will perform a free winter concert featuring Pomp and Circumstance No. 4 (E. Elgar); Symphony No. 41 in C Major (Mozart); Hansel and Gretel (Humperdinck); and Water Music (Handel). Check it out on Monday, November 26, from 7 to 8:30 pm, at Wake Center, Thornton Hall, 300 North Turnpike in Goleta. For more information, call (805) 964-5853.

1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

REAL ESTATE

| N OV E M B E R 2 3 – 3 0 | 2 0 1 2 |

23

2005 Laguna Street

By Michael Calcagno Michael has consistently been ranked in the

top 1% of Sotheby’s agents worldwide. Shortly after joining Sotheby’s, he partnered with Nancy Hamilton to form one of the most successful real estate teams in Santa Barbara.

Michael can be reached at Michael@HomesinSantaBarbara.com

Gobble, Gobble, Gobble ‘Em Up

I

f you are sitting around this week contemplating having a second helping of leftovers or are needing to get away from certain family members for a while (in my case you know who you are), may I suggest getting out of the house and taking a walk or driving by one of these well-priced properties? Chances are they won’t last much longer.

4750 Calle Las Brisas

This single-story, 4-bedroom, 4-bath home is located in the gated neighborhood of Las Brisas at More Mesa. Originally built in 2004, the home is approximately 3,145 square feet on about 0.21 acres. The property is flanked by More Mesa, the popular 200+ acres of ocean bluff property with walking paths and trails. The home has been reduced over $200,000 making it an incredible deal for the neighborhood.

Purchase price: $1,495,000 Down payment (25%): $373,500 Loan amount: $1,121,250 Loan Payment: $5,113 (30 yr fixed at 3.55% (3.62% APR))

Property taxes estimate: $1,370 Home insurance estimate: $100 Total Monthly Payment:

2005 Laguna Street

Near the historic Mission and close to downtown, this home is located in the desirable Upper East. The property sits on a quarter-acre behind the old Mission wall and offers privacy and convenience. The home has 3 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms, and has been extensively remodeled inside and out. A lovely outdoor kitchen and patio are south facing, offering a sunny backyard and perfect place to hang out.

951 Barcelona Drive

In the quiet Hidden Valley neighborhood just behind Hope Ranch, this large home sits on a sizable lot. Originally built in the 1960, the home has 4 bedrooms and 2 baths with approximately 2,135 square feet of interior space on 0.32 acres. In addition to a 2-car garage, the home has a large workshop with high ceilings and roll up doors. It’s a great family home in need of a little TLC, but well worth the price.

4750 Calle Las Brisas

$6,583

951 Barcelona Purchase price: $775,000 Down payment (20%): $155,000 Loan amount: $620,000 Loan Payment: $2,741 (30 yr fixed at 3.375% (3.44% APR))

Property taxes estimate: $710 Home insurance estimate: $80 Total Monthly Payment:

$3,531

Purchase price: $1,299,000 Down payment (20%): $259,800 Loan amount: $1,039,200 Loan Payment: $4,695 (30 yr fixed at 3.55% (3.62% APR))

Property taxes estimate: $1,190 Home insurance estimate: $100 Total Monthly Payment:

$5,985

Mortgage statistics provided by Justin M. Kellenberger, Senior Loan Officer at SG Premier Lending Group, Inc. Justin can always be reached at justin@sgpremierlending.com.

Note: The foregoing economic breakdowns do not include potential tax benefit analyses since that will ultimately depend upon a number of additional factors. But home ownership can indeed have tremendous tax-savings potential and should be considered with your realtor and/or tax accountant as part of the ownership decision.

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