Outside the Noise and into the Wild

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OUTSIDE THE NOISE AND INTO THE WILD HOW A PADDLE IN HAND, A KAYAK AS A VESSEL, AND SANTA CRUZ ISLAND BECAME ONE WRITER’S PRESCRIPTION FOR A PEACEFUL POINT OF VIEW (STORY ON P.22)

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S haron’s Take – Sharon Byrne makes her declaration of independence during the political year of the “Unexpected” – and offers insight to the specific types of Independent voters

P.6 P.7 P.8

Biweekly Capitalist – Jeff Harding does some number-crunching involving California’s rank and file; the upshot is that a $15 minimum wage doesn’t add up S tate Street Scribe – Jeff Wing kisses and makes up with Conservatism. A little. And the Lorax shall lie down with the Hydroelectric dam. eer Guy – Zach Rosen is on the move again, hunkering down in Coachella B Valley, where beer flows copiously – but he also visits parched Arizona for a taste of the Southwest

P.13

Fortnight – Artists At Play at SOhO; “Can Alzheimer’s Be Stopped?”; Concussion at UCSB; Jaws is back; Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater; SBCC Theater Group and Proof; Rubicon hosts eXtras; ETC presents Bad Jews; and hip-hop foursome at SB Bowl

P.14

On Real Estate – Steve Decker explores the SB market as buyers resist price upticks, advising sellers to reassess what it bears and explaining what it means to homeowners with negative equity; he also takes a look at home loans and lenders

P.16

Man About Town – A healthy Mark Leisuré is back on the beat, chronicling the Emerald Ball, TGIF by EDC, theaters and screens, Wave Film Festival, and Network Medical’s short film contest

P.20

The Local – Check out Quick Bites, Q&A with the 1975’s Matthew Healy, Cause & Effect: Al Fresco with Angels Foster Care, Lisa Bassler is On The Spot, Take A Hike on Grass Mountain, Obsessed with Extraordinary Pony, 5 Things about Eric Haymes, and more

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Berry Man – Cory Clark looks back at the 1800s’ Irish Potato Famine to expound on “monocropping” and explains why monoculture persists today Cause & Effect – Angels Foster Care, which has helped SB County-born infants and toddlers for a decade, hosts “Al Fresco Afternoon on the Riviera” luncheon

P.22 P.24 P.29 P.30 P.32

Living SB – Megan Waldrep makes waves with Santa Barbara Adventure Company, traversing Santa Cruz Island via ferry and kayak Plan B – Briana Westmacott writes about the birds and the trees – primarily a newborn birdie named Oak whose life comes to an end, as life tends to do

Art Beat – Jacquelyn De Longe peeks into the tent of Rhythm Circus (animals not included) at UCSB’s Campbell stage on April 17

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American Girl – Tommie Vaughn makes a fashion statement that brides will likely agree with: Henna Me Beautiful owner Afshan Khan knows art and style

Behind The Vine – Hana-Lee Sedgwick raises her glass to winemaker Michael Roth and old pal Craig Winchester, who joined forces to create Lo-Fi three years ago

P.33

I Heart SB – Melissa Esposito, a local poet and artist, churns out the write stuff for individuals who enjoyed a romantic date or two – only to see the “relationship” inexplicably vaporize

P.34

SYV Snapshot – Eva Van Prooyen is at it again, making note of the SB Vintners Festival, Waste and Electronics Drop-off in Los Olivos, Refugio Ranch Tasting Room, SpringFest, guitar show, Rancho Techno, Rollermania, and Chumash Earth Day

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by Sharon Byrne

take

Sharon’s education in engineering and psychology gives her a distinctive mix of skills for writing about and working on quality-of-life, public safety and public policy issues. Her hyper-local SB View column can be found every other week.

A Most Strange and Unusual Primary: An Indy’s View

I

t is the year of the Unexpected in politics. Anything can happen, or at least that’s how it feels.

This is a good year to be an Independent, because nationally, the parties seem to be thrashing and flailing, disbelieving their fates with frontrunner candidates they desperately didn’t want. In a year when it’s bad to be the Establishment Candidate, Indy voters smell a chance to finally exert some influence.

Indies are not a homogenous group of political miscreants, but actually come in three distinct camps, at least locally, so when you’re fishing for one to convert to your candidate or cause, it’s helpful to know your fish: 1. The Pissed-off Exile. Detectable within 30 seconds of conversation. Formerly Democrat or Republican, they’re pretty engaged politically. Their party took a major wrong turn in their eyes, and they’ve re-registered as an Independent in protest.

They’re still aligned with their party’s principles and philosophy, though, and still mostly vote those lines.

2. The Disenfranchised-and-Unengaged: This camp is mostly under 35, mostly male. They loathe politics-as-usual and feel good about being committed to not committing to anything politically. They embody slack-tivism and seldom vote. It takes a candidate that evokes a combo of Jesse Ventura, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Donald Trump to get them excited. Once roused, they will turn up at a poll and cast that vote, for president only.

3. The True Independent. The smallest camp of Indies, this fish is highly engaged and votes regularly. They pick who they think is the best candidate for the job, regardless of party. Indies will look at both parties’ stances on an issue with an

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eye for anything useful on offer. They’re likely to grab 10-20 percent of a solution offered by either party, and cast off the rest when they detect dogma, rhetoric, or party-shoring attempts. They want to solve problems, not further either party’s interests, so they also abhor gridlock and party-hijacks of an issue. True Indies will readily cross political lines, seeing traditional party boundaries as arbitrary and somewhat silly. This approach to politics bothers political parties, naturally, so the politically active Indy is often greeted with intense scrutiny and suspicion by partisans in both camps.

Locally, Republicans invite Indies to their functions if the Indy indicates willingness to support and work together on at least some issues Republicans care about. This is a matter of practicality. If you’re the minority party, and declining in number, your best option is to open the tent. If Indies won’t convert over, at least they can be useful allies from time-to-time.

As the majority party, Democrats can afford to be more exclusive, and they are.

The SB Democratic Central Committee seems to want their party members to march in line, or face the equivalent of Dem Siberia. Several sensible moderate Dems find themselves in exile for daring to hold a view the party leadership views as mutinous. In exile, Dems run into Independents who often agree with the stances that produced exile. And those Indies might then introduce the Dem-now-in-needof-a-tribe to friendly Republicans eager for new potential allies.

I recently was invited to a Democratic club event to get out the troops for their endorsed candidates. There were almost more electeds and candidates in the room than volunteers. Everyone was very pleasant. I had been invited by a lady with a great political mind. She firmly believes that Dems are supposed to be the open tent people, and she likes working together to solve problems. Apparently, my presence ruffled some feathers, as the tent-opener is being persecuted for wanting to welcome others in. She’s standing her ground, and this Indy admires her deeply for it, proving yet once again that nothing is ever as it seems in politics.

As for the local races, there are several open seats. As with the presidency, open seats have drawn establishment insiders and upstarts that gained surprising traction.

And anything can happen.

This Indy is going with the best person for the job, regardless of party. People died for us to have the right to vote, so honor their sacrifice, and exercise that right to the best of your ability.

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Bi-Weekly Capitalist

by Jeff Harding

Jeff Harding is a real estate investor and a writer on economics and finance. He is the former publisher of the Daily Capitalist, a popular economics blog. He is also an adjunct professor at SBCC.

California’s War on Workers

C

alifornia just reached a deal for a $15-per-hour minimum wage. It is presently $10 an hour and will rise to $10.50 in 2017, $11 in 2018, and a dollar each year through 2022.

The law is the result of a “living wage” campaign by labor unions and progressive organizations over the past two years. They say wages should be paid according to workers’ needs. Now that we’re in the Game of Thrones political season, California’s liberal politicians are pulled to the left and, to firm up their progressive street cred, they push a $15 minimum wage.

Consider that California already has the reputation of being hostile to business.

According to a CNBC survey, California is ranked dead-last among all states in “business friendliness” and “cost of doing business.” Here in Santa Barbara, we just lost the parent company of Carl’s Jr. to Tennessee. Some don’t actually leave California, but they reduce their footprint here and expand elsewhere.

Could it be that laws like the $15 minimum wage have something to do with California being the worst state in America for business?

It is true that California has the largest economy in America, and about equal to Italy’s (number 8 worldwide). Before you get carried away by the data thinking that business does okay anyway, if you look at a chart comparing California’s GDP to population growth, the two lines are roughly parallel. Which means, as every economist knows, that population growth is one of the major drivers of GDP growth.

There are 39 million Californians.

Don’t get me wrong, California is a great place to live. And Santa Barbara, well … the best. But it’s great only if you can afford it. As we all know, California is expensive.

It’s even more expensive for those at the bottom of the income rung. These are folks with the least job skills.

The stated purpose of a minimum wage is to increase the welfare of workers which is certainly a noble ideal. The problem is that it doesn’t do that.

Let me demonstrate why that is.

First of all, $15 per hour isn’t a “living wage.” It equates to $30,000 before taxes, which, according to MIT, is close to “poverty wages.” They say a family of two adults and two children in Santa Barbara need to make about $54,000 for a “living wage.”

Even this is too low because they allot only $1,300 a month for housing. Good luck finding that unit. A low-end, two-bedroom apartment in this town is maybe $2,300 all in. So, a “living wage” here is at least $60,000 for a family. It’s not much less for single moms. That means the minimum wage needs to be $25 to $30 per hour for a “living wage” in Santa Barbara.

If politicians want to raise the poor out of poverty, and they believe the minimum wage does that, why don’t they increase the minimum wage to $30? If their theory is correct that forcing businesses to pay higher wages will raise these workers’ standard of living and boost the economy through increased consumer spending, shouldn’t they just do it?

They don’t because they know that businesses can’t just raise wages to whatever the government wants. Why? Because they know it will cause businesses to go broke, resulting in high unemployment. But they say that $15 is “reasonable” and “businesses can afford it.”

Well, I have a question for them: how the hell do they know what the correct wage should be for any business? There are almost a million businesses in California. Only

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business owners are capable of determining what their employees should be paid.

The major fallacy of the minimum wage is the assumption that all businesses are affected equally across the board, and higher wages will be easily passed along to the consumer. That isn’t the case. Each business has a different cost structure, different labor requirements, a different competitive environment, different capital structures, different management practices, and some are more efficient than others.

When faced with arbitrary wage increases, businesses will face the following alternatives: 1. If profit margins are high enough to absorb the higher cost, accept less profit.

2. Lay off workers, reduce output and sales, and accept less profit.

3. Replace workers with machines to stay efficient and maintain sales and profit.

4. Raise prices to offset wage increases and hope sales and profit stay the same.

5. Raise prices to offset wage increases and sales decline, resulting in less profit.

6. Cut non-labor costs to offset wage increases and hope profits stay the same (assumes no competition).

7. Cut non-labor costs to offset wage increases and sales decline because of cheaper quality, resulting in less profit.

8. Or, more efficient competitors reduce costs, but not quality, resulting in reduced sales and profit.

9. Or, more efficient competitors reduce costs and prices, but not quality, resulting in reduced sales and profit.

10. Move from California to Texas.

11. Go out of business.

In only one of the above scenarios do profits and jobs remain the same, which is number 4, wherein producers are all the same and consumers gladly pay higher prices.

Based on the complexity of our economy, that is highly unlikely.

Do workers benefit?

If businesses can uniformly pass along costs to consumers as in No. 4, then all workers will be poorer because everything will be more expensive.

It is more likely that the least-efficient, unskilled workers will be laid off or be unable to find jobs. If business profits are squeezed, then workers who can’t produce more than they are paid will be fired. Even though unskilled workers are willing to work for less, they can’t, and the opportunity to work is lost.

Does the economy as a whole benefit because of increased consumer spending from these workers?

I would like someone to explain this to me. If I reduce my profit and give it to workers, why does taking money from my pocket and giving it to someone else help the economy? The assumption here is that profits sit in some mattress and are never spent. Certainly, business owners spend money as consumers. And, what they don’t spend is invested in their business to stay competitive and profitable. Or they invest it and provide capital for other businesses to grow and create jobs. There is no net gain here and, since profits are reduced, there is less capital to fund businesses, which reduces job opportunities.

The net effect of raising the minimum wage to $15 will result in fewer jobs over time and fewer business opportunities in California. Unskilled workers will be worse off as a result.

The $15 minimum wage is a war against California workers and businesses.

Publisher/Editor • Tim Buckley | Design/Production • Trent Watanabe Editor/Creative Director • Megan Waldrep Columnists Shop Girl • Kateri Wozny | Man About Town • Mark Leisure Plan B • Briana Westmacott | Food File • Christina Enoch Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy | The Weekly Capitalist • Jeff Harding The Beer Guy • Zach Rosen | Cinema Scope • James Luksic Girl About Town • Julie Bifano | In The Zone • Tommie Vaughn I Heart SB • Elizabeth Rose | Fortnight • Jeff Wing State Street Scribe • Jeff Wing | Holistic Deliberation • Allison Antoinette Up Close • Jacquelyn De Longe | Behind The Vine • Hana-Lee Sedgwick The Local • Megan Waldrep | Lanny’s Take • Lanny Ebenstein Advertising/Sales Tanis Nelson • 805.689.0304 • tanis@santabarbarasentinel.com Sue Brooks • 805.455.9116 • sue@santabarbarasentinel.com Judson Bardwell • 619.379.1506 • judson@santabarbarasentinel.com Kim Collins • 805.895.1305 • kim@santabarbarasentinel.com Published by SB Sentinel, LLC PRINTED BY NPCP INC., SANTA BARBARA, CA Santa Barbara Sentinel is compiled every other Friday 133 EAST DE LA GUERRA STREET, #182, Santa Barbara 93101 How to reach us: 805.845.1673 • E-MAIL: tim@santabarbarasentinel.com

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STATE STREET SCRIBE

by Jeff Wing

Jeff is a journalist, raconteur, autodidact, and polysyllable enthusiast. A long-time resident of SB, he takes great delight in chronicling the lesser known facets of this gaudy jewel by the sea. Jeff can be reached at jeffwingg@gmail.com.

A Lib Confesses

I

’m an NPR guy, okay? Yeah, I got beat up by the bike rack in 7th grade like most nascent liberals, earned my stripes like the rest of my lot – by being ill-advisedly sympathetic at the wrong time (see Homebuilders Association of Northern California versus the Vernal Pool Fairy Shrimp).

The bully, who I’ll here call JK, had kicked poor little big-butt Tony Matthews so hard in the ass during a soccer game in PE, the force had actually lifted Tony off the ground. I’d reacted spontaneously and unwisely, earning my adolescent “Bleeding-Heart-Soy-BasedBonehead” creds by briskly hollering at JK and eliciting from him a promise he would meet me after school. “Naw, we don’t hafta meet,” I’d actually said in those first panicked seconds of sobriety, attempting to de-escalate. Think that worked?

When after last period I went to retrieve my Stingray with its sparkly banana seat and faux-wood-knobbed, 3-speed stick shift (litigiously positioned to bludgeon my groin in the event of even the most minor biking mishap), JK was there grasping the handlebars of my beloved. This weasel-faced bully was about half my size and so homely I found myself actually pitying him (see?!) in the seconds before his surprisingly practiced fist introduced itself to my left cheekbone.

Could I have taken him? Yeah. I could have taken him for a short run by fleeing like a panicked rag doll. But I knew he and his two minions would quickly catch and thrash me with renewed vigor. While the two assistants stood in the background smirking with their arms crossed, JK struck me in the head once, twice, Three Times a Lady.

There was no ceremony, no verbiage, just a dreamlike minute whose sweepsecond hand took its sweet time rounding the face of my cheap Indiglo Timex. POW! two three. POW! two

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The blows fell with a stunning blunt force that to my utter surprise did not mimic the slappy-sounding, easy-toshake-off punches one saw on TV all the time. I vividly remember thinking, as the punctuated jabs landed with the sickening sound of skin smashing into skin: “Shit! This is nothing like I imagined!” From that moment on, I understood that were I recipient of a Kojak or Mannix-quality beating in real life I would likely not survive it, let alone straighten my collar and make out with a beautiful woman afterward. Huh UH.

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Later that same emotionally misbegotten lifetime, I of course became a member of NPR; the broadcast maypole around which we mercy-dispensing Libs delightedly prance in our forest-green tights. I love NPR. My ex-girlfriend (read: wife) and I pledge to them semi-regularly, and in pitiable dollar amounts insufficient to earn us the coveted NPR Grail, or mug, as it’s known to the unwashed.

I depend on NPR’s deep reporting, interestingly unpredictable interviews, and frontline real-time dispatches to help augment my world view, which is informed by the twin lights of mercy and fairness. Having said that, I can tell you that when I turned on my car radio the other day and the NPR team were murmuring soporifically about salad or human rights or some such, I reflexively punched the AM button for escape. Sometimes the radiant self-congratulation of the NPR gang makes me want to go out and shoot an endangered Snail Darter in the legs.

There, I said it.

The Left! Look at us! No wonder ...continued p.12

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by Zach Rosen

The Beer Guy Goes Far Afield

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he value of beer is in its fragility.

Many factors can damage beer: light, heat, and time are the biggest culprits. Beer doesn’t travel well.

You have to travel to it. I am sad to announce that I have recently moved out of the Santa Barbara area. The decision was tough, but I have made a choice to leave the comfort of the Central Coast and head out on the road to travel to beer. Whether locally or afar, I want to discover new beers, breweries, and get to know the other beer scenes around the world.

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I hopped in my car early Sunday morning and drove up to Tempe, making it just in time to check into my hotel before grabbing an Uber over to the WOB’s downtown location (it is a beer interview, so you expect to drink). The restaurant was filled with professionals, enthusiasts, and people who just thought it sounded like fun. We piled into the sunny room of earth tones, metal accents, and beer paraphernalia. We were organized by groups but brought upstairs one-byone to be interviewed by two judges.

Downstairs, the conversation bustled as

Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

we got to know one another. Technically, we were in competition – but as is true with almost all beerdoes, everyone was friendly, fun, and supportive.

I left WOB feeling good about my interview, and possibly from the three beers I drank while there (that’s about standard for an interview in the beer industry), including a bière de mars from Jolly Pumpkin Artisan Ales that had a bready, hay character and a mild brettanomyces note in the finish (see the previous column for my feature on the bière de mars style).

Myself and two new friends I had made at the interview headed over to the classic Irish pub, Rúla Búla, to grab some lunch, another beer, and to continue the conversation. Starving, I had to go with the AZ Burger and, of course, a Black and Tan. The burger was stacked with sautéed jalapenos, peppered cheese, and a sour cream chipotle sauce. After the decadent burger and a side of the House Champ Potatoes, mashed potatoes with gravy, cheese, bacon, and chives, I was no longer hungry. The light drinking Black and Tan was a soothing accompaniment to the spicy burger.

Not ready to part ways yet, we headed over to Endgame Restaurant and Bar. This dark tavern, tucked upstairs and just off of the popular Mill Ave, is filled with countless TVs that are hooked up

Join us for some warm Irish hospitality, authentic food and excellent pints.

$10 daily lunch menu featuring over 13 items.

18 E ORTEGA ST., SANTA BARBARA • 11:302:00AM EVERY DAY 805-568-0702 • www.dargans.com •

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with both classic and modern video games such as Golden Eye on N64 and Halo. All of the arcades are on free play, too, and you can grab a beer with buddies while playing video games to your heart’s content. We all grabbed a pint of the rich and delicious Left Hand Milk Stout while playing a round of games. After exchanging contact info, we parted ways and my whirlwind Tempe excursion came to an end.

Going Abroad The past 10 years in Santa Barbara has been like living in an everlasting vacation in paradise, but also more than that. It has been inspiring to see the local beer scene blossom and prosper, and not just to witness its growth, but to be in the trenches with the brewers and work alongside them to help make the Central Coast beer scene as vibrant as it is today. When I first arrived in Santa Barbara, there was only a few breweries in the area. There wasn’t even an SB Sentinel. From collaborating with brewers to coordinating with other beer writers, there have been an overwhelming amount of unforgettable memories and tasty beers along the way.

It has been an honor to work with so many talented brewers and restaurants as this paper’s The Beer Guy, and I am in no way done with Santa Barbara.

I may have not gotten the WOB gig, but I made a few new friends that already feel like old buddies, and that is the magic of travel, and beer. It offers you a chance to meet new people, discover unheard of beers and breweries, and explore worlds unbeknownst to myself and others. In this column, I will continue to provide you with interesting happenings and new beers in Santa Barbara but also invite you to travel along with me both here and on my new website (thebeerguyabroad.com), as I go abroad in the wonderful world of beer.

Back Home Brew

Firestone Walker Brewing Co. Luponic Distortion Revolution No. 001 he first revolution of Firestone’s new Revolving Hop Series, Luponic Distortion, is an experimental IPA that uses six new hop varieties. A clean, biscuit malt character frames the juicy

T

Firestone Walker’s Luponic Distortion is the first release in a new rotating IPA series

hops that leap out of the glass with notes of pineapples, peaches, and lemon meringue, followed by a hint of flowers that brightens the other aromas. This undeniably refreshing and fragrant beer is a powerful reminder of why this brewery is considered one of the masters of hops. brewLAB Roggensauer infused with Apricots oggensauer is an exotic brew made with 100-percent malted rye, fermented with lactobacillus cultures, and then aged on different fruits. The current version has apricots to add a pitfruit flavor to this tart beer that tastes of bread dough and spice. Taste this and many other exotic beers at the Indiegogo Campaign Finale this Saturday.

R

Upcoming Beer Events

Saturday 4/9: 4-10 pm – brewLAB Indiegogo Campaign Finale Sunday 4/10: Final day to support brewLAB’s Indiegogo campaign!

Tuesday 4/12: 5:30-7:30 pm – Q&A with the Brewmaster at M.Special Thursday 4/21: 7-9 pm – Comedy Night at Figueroa Mountain Buellton

Tickets Available Now

Saturday 5/7: Telegraph Brewing Presents: Dia de los Obscuras 2016 Saturday 6/11: Craft Brew Circus (www. craftbrewcircus.com)

Spring has sprung and rosé season has returned!

Rosé flights are back at Corks n’ Crowns Don’t forget to drink pink.

Corks n’ Crowns Tasting Room and Wine Shop

32 Anacapa Street in the heart of Santa Barbara's Funk Zone Hours: Monday-Sunday 11am-7pm

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by Steven Libowitz

Tell us all about your art opening, performance, dance party, book signing, sale of something we can’t live without, or event of any other kind by emailing fortnight@santabarbarasentinel.com. If our readers can go to it, look at it, eat it, or buy it, we want to know about it and will consider it for inclusion here.

Special consideration will be given to interesting, exploratory, unfamiliar, and unusual items. We give calendar preference to those who take the time to submit a picture along with their listing.

Homage to Glen Campbell, SOhO-Style

I

t could barely be better timing for Artists At Play, the San Luis Obispobased singer-songwriter collective, to pay tribute to the great Glen Campbell.

The country singer turned pop star is reportedly living in a Nashville memory care facility as he undergoes the final stage of Alzheimer’s, the degenerative brain disease, and is unable to communicate. Two years ago, Campbell himself shared his journey through the earliest stages of the debilitating disease in the documentary Glen Campbell: I’ll Be Me, which featured the Grammywinning and Oscar-nominated song “I’m Not Gonna Miss You”. Campbell himself performed at the Lobero in a big benefit concert for Alzheimer’s research a couple of years earlier. Now it’s up to others to interpret the marvelous songs that he made famous, most notably compositions by Jimmy Webb (who also performed at the Lobero in 2014) such as “Galveston”, “MacArthur’s Park”, “Wichita Lineman”, and “By the Time I Get to Phoenix”. A full complement of SLO and Santa Barbara-based musicians – including Robert Postel, Bruce Goldish, Steve Fort, Gary Foshee, Jeanne Newhall, John Gannon, Brent Dannells, Kat Devlin, and James Blanco – will play the classics and more obscure songs, one or two each, at SOhO on Tuesday, April 12. Admission is $12.

Info at 962-7776 or www.sohosb.com.

All for Alzheimer’s

For those who prefer to delve deeper into the disease itself, UCSB’s Pollock Theater is hosting a pre-screening of the PBS NOVA program “Can Alzheimer’s Be Stopped?” on the very same night (Tuesday, April 12). The program examines the condition, which ravages the minds of more than 40 million victims worldwide, stripping them of their memories and often their dignity. The NOVA show finds investigators gathering clues in an attempt to reconstruct the molecular chain of events that ultimately leads to dementia, follows key researchers in the field who have helped to develop the leading theories of the disease, and traces the stories of individuals from all walks of life revealing what it’s like to struggle with Alzheimer’s. The program also goes behind the scenes of major drug trials to see how researchers

target and test therapies that may slow and even prevent Alzheimer’s. The screening will be followed by a panel discussion with Kenneth Kosik, MD (co-director Neuroscience Research Institute UC Santa Barbara), Sarah Holt (producer at HHMI/Tangled Bank Studios, & NOVA/PBS), and Rhonda Spiegel (CEO, Alzheimer’s Association, California Central Chapter), and Francisco Lopera, MD (professor of Behavioral Neurology, chief of Neurosciences ProgramUniversity of Antioquia, Coordinator Group of Neurosciences of Antioquia).

The discussion will be moderated by Julia Cort, senior producer, NOVA. The event is free, but a reservation is recommended (www.carseywolf.ucsb. edu/pollock/events/can-alzheimers-bestopped) to guarantee a seat.

Movie Gets into Your Head

Chronic traumatic encephalopathy, a.k.a. CTE – the other increasingly diagnosed brain disease that at first was confused for Alzheimer’s – was the subject of the 2015 movie Concussion.

Despite the trendy topic and a bravura performance by Will Smith as the Pittsburgh pathologist who discovers the condition and makes the connection with repeated violent head collisions in football (as well as fine supporting turns from Alec Baldwin and Albert Brooks), the film was virtually ignored at the Oscars and other year-end awards.

While Concussion was released for home media (DVD, Blu-Ray) last month, it will get another big screen showing at Wednesday, April 13, at UCSB’s Pollock Theater, the state-of-the-art facility on campus, as part of the school’s Focus on Humanity and the Brain series. The screening will be followed by a Q&A with Dr. David A. Hovda, director of the UCLA Brain Injury Research Center, moderated by Susan Derwin, director of UCSB’s Interdisciplinary Humanities Center. Admission to the 7-10 pm event is free, but reservations are strongly recommended. Get more info and sign up at www.carseywolf. u c s b. e d u / p o l l o c k / e v e n t s / f o c u s humanities-and-brain-concussion.

Open Wide for Jaws

The third night in a row of events at Pollock leaves diseases of the brain

behind – unless, of course, you think that folks who decided to go ocean swimming at night despite warnings of shark attack need to have their head examined! Yes, the theater’s Script to Screen series is going back 40 years to resurrect Jaws, the 1975 summer blockbuster that basically invented the concept as it terrified millions with its story of a gigantic man-eating Great White shark off the coast of Long Island. Roy Scheider, Richard Dreyfuss, Robert Shaw and a 25-foot mechanical shark named Bruce – who went on to become the most popular attraction at the brand-new Universal Theme Park – star in the movie that had folks afraid to even take baths, let alone step into the ocean. The screening, Thursday April14, will be followed by a Q&A with screenwriter Carl Gottlieb, the writer-actor who also co-wrote the Steve Martin hit comedy The Jerk, and a free Jawsthemed reception in the Michael Douglas lobby. Free admission; reservations recommended. Info: www.carseywolf.ucsb.edu/pollock/ events/script-screen-jaws.

Ailey Residence at Arlington

Nearly 60 years in, Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater remains the most popular modern dance company in the country, still using its well-honed movement to express the African-American cultural experience, and ever expanding its repertoire since the tenure of its third artistic director, Robert Battle, began five years ago. As with each of its recent visits to town, the Ailey troupe is doing a two-day residency (April 12-13) at the Arlington Theatre downtown, an entirely different program each night, which attests to the range, the breadth and sheer competency of its dancers. “Revelations”, Ailey’s masterpiece that draws upon his “blood memories” of Texas in a gospel-infused exploration of experiences ranging from deep grief to holy joy, anchors Tuesday night’s program, which also includes Rennie Harris’s “Exodus”, Ronald K. Brown’s “Open Door” and Christopher Wheeldon’s “After the Rain Pas de Deux”. Talley Beatty’s “Toccata”, Judith Jamison’s “A Case of You”, “Revelations”. Ailey’s masterpiece drew upon his “blood memories” of

Texas, using the blues, spirituals, and gospel as inspiration, and expressing the cultural heritage of the AfricanAmerican experience, “sometimes sorrowful, sometimes jubilant, but always hopeful,” in a suite that fervently explores the places of deepest grief and holiest joy. “Revelations” closes the program on opening night, which also features Rennie Harris’s “Exodus”, Ronald K. Brown’s “Open Door” and Christopher Wheeldon’s “After the Rain Pas de Deux”, while Wednesday’s works include Talley Beatty’s “Toccata”, Judith Jamison’s “A Case of You”, Ulysses Dove’s “Vespers”, Robert Battle’s “The Hunt”, and Brown’s “Four Corners”.

Tickets will set you back about $40$75, a bargain considering you’ll be witnessing an American institution.

Call 893-3535/963-4408 or visit www.

ArtsAndLectures.UCSB.edu or/www. ticketmaster.com/venue/73731.

SBCC Has Living Proof

If, as 400-year-old birthday boy William Shakespeare once posited, then we’ve got quite a few things to choose from over the fortnight. Or maybe, ahem, the proof is in the pudding.

SBCC Theater Group brings back Proof, David Auburn’s cleverly constructed piece that balances romance, mystery, and math. A troubled young woman who has spent years caring for her brilliant but unstable father who is a famous mathematician, finds herself having to deal with confronting her estranged sister and accommodating a former student of her father’s who wants to comb through her dad’s notebooks and possibly date her. Over the course of a long weekend that follows, the burgeoning romance and the discovery of a mysterious notebook draw her into a seemingly unsolvable problem with the highest of stakes.

Proof, which won the 2001 Pulitzer Prize and Tony Award for Best Play, should play with even more tension in the intimate Jurkowitz Theatre in this new production directed by R. Michael Gros. Previews begin Wednesday, April 13, and performances continue through April 30. Tickets are $14$26. Call 965-5935 or visit www. theatregroupsbcc.com.

eXtras: Read All About It

Also beginning previews on April 13 is the American premiere of eXtras, the hilarious story of what happens when a Hollywood film company descends upon a small California-Mexico border town to shoot a major motion picture, wreaking havoc on the fragile ecosystem of the community. Sabina Berman’s play is loosely adapted from Marie Jones’s Olivier Award-winning

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APRIL 21 THROUGH 24 IN SANTA BARBARA

comedy Stones in His Pockets, and stars brothers Bruno and Odiseo Bichir, who are accomplished veterans of Mexican theater and television and film in both countries. Making their U.S. stage debuts in the Rubicon Theater production, the Bechir Brothers play more than 15 characters, including the producer, starlet, director, crew, and local residents, some of who are cast as “extras” on the set. Maya Burns’s combo will perform ranchero, corrido, and Mexican surfer rock pre-show and during intermission. Tickets for eXtras, which runs through May 1, cost $25-$54. Info at 667-2900 or www. rubicontheatre.org.

Good for Bad Jews

It’s “holy vs. holier-than-thou” when Ensemble Theatre Company (ETC) presents Joshua Harmon’s Bad Jews, a four-character comedy that captured rave reviews when it played Broadway in 2013. The death of a family patriarch has elicited a competition between Daphna Feygenbaum and her cousin Liam vying to obtain his treasured family heirloom and religious symbol.

The story unfolds with “delectably savage humor” and “crackles with energy”, wrote The New York Times, which called Bad Jews the comedy of the season. ETC artistic director Jonathan Fox helms the production of the uproarious exploration of faith and family that is as thought-provoking and poignant as it is viciously funny. Bad Jews plays at the New Vic April 14-May 1. Tickets start at $35. Call 965-5400 or visit www.ensembletheatre.com.

Music Mania in the Bowl

Twenty-five dates have already been announced for the 2016 season at the Santa Barbara Bowl, which gets underway April 19 with hip-hop quadruple header headlined by G-Eazy, with Nef The Pharaoh, Marty Grimes, and Daghe rounding out the bill.

Tickets cost $34.50-$54.50. Two days later, the British pop rock band The 1975 make an appearance in support of their sophomore album, I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it. Fellow Brits The Japanese House open. Tickets: $34.50-$49.50.

Get info, tickets, and the complete Bowl schedule online at www.sbbowl. com, or call 962-7411.

A Landmark Conference Marking Pacifica Graduate Institute’s 40th Anniversary Climates of Change and the Therapy of Ideas On April 21 through 24, internationally recognized leaders in social, political, economic, and environmental arenas will gather on Pacifica Graduate Institute’s Ladera Lane Campus to explore the ways we can re-imagine the economies and ecologies that shape our world. Participants will listen, learn, and work together to spark innovative action. Join us for a stimulating and provocative weekend, as we move toward re-harmonizing and transforming our ways of living on this planet.

FEATURING PRESENTATIONS by leading scholars, psychologists, cultural critics, and artists… inlcuding

CHRIS HEDGES

VANDANA SHIVA

THOMAS MOORE

See Chris Hedges, Thomas Moore, and others interviewed at pacificapost.com

Information and conference registration at pacifica.edu 805.969.3626, ext. 103

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...continued from p.7

JK beat me senseless by my newish Schwinn! Was it this quality of mercy that so strained the Romans that they simply had to beat up our Guy? Oh, and speaking of Christ, how did the “Left,” whose goofy policy positions actually reflect New Testament teaching, lose Christ to a Conservative movement that has not only armed the Lord with a machine gun, but seems to crap on His less-advantaged sheep with impunity? I’ll tell you how. It’s a little something called Freedom; a much-maligned and tactically abused concept. Freedom is a cult here, I would suggest. It is safe to say the U.S. is beholden to a cult. Do we need deprogramming?

How May I Help You?

Evidential Apologetics (Or Why Believing the Bible Isn't Stupid) Dr. Daniel R. vanVoorhis, Assistant Dean of the School of Arts and Science and Associate Professor of History and Political Thought at Concordia University Irvine and co-host of the weekly podcast Virtue in the Wasteland.

Friday, April 22, 2016 6:00 PM Room A160 SBCC Admin Building

www.facebook.com/CampusApologetics paul@campusapologetics.org 805.687.3734

Is the goal for people to be comfortable, fed, and content?

Strenuously equalized participants in a pageant where everyone gets a little tin trophy? Eww! No way! (So sayeth the grossed-out borderline endomorph who has never gone two days and nights without eating.) Or is the goal to be superb, a roman candle fulfilling in absolute terms as much of one’s human potential as possible in the time allotted, whatever that may be? Okay, I’m gonna come clean, as they say (or used to say – and seeing it in type I understand why they stopped saying it): I get Conservatism.

I understand the inherent common sense and actual human glory that inheres in the Every-man-for-Himself model. We are human beings. It’s a big deal. That is maybe the biggest deal. Cosmology, teleology, and the meddlesome Anthropic Principle aside, a human being is a big deal. Big Bill Shakespeare described a human being thus: “The beauty of the world.

The paragon of animals.”

Oughtn’t we encourage one another to stand and fight and not succumb?

I’ve taken my shots at Conservatism, and they are a fat, slow-moving target at a glance. But I think I understand that the heart of true conservatism is not contempt for the poor and the downtrodden, but contempt for the culture that doesn’t see them as the Paragon of Animals but as lost ninny children who will never find their way.

I get it. Homelessness and hopelessness and poverty and the desecration of the human spirit – these are real, miserysowing, ongoing diseases that need blazing attention, but kindling the latent fire inside a person is surely part of the cure, if only a small part.

…and a Side of Freedom Fries

It comes down to Freedom, I’m afraid; an uber-American noun so

laden with baggage it looks like an Eastern Airlines scab on Skycap strike day. Freedom? Haven’t we long since become bored silly by that numbing word, inured to its deeper, almost religious meaning by the stupidity of today’s polarizing shitheel discourse?

Today’s Conservatives champion “Freedom” but many of them throw the word around so recklessly it amounts to disrespect for what is a sacred state of being. Take, for instance, the “Freedom Fries” the House of Representatives cafeteria began serving in place of French Fries when the Gauls had the balls to equivocate at the U.S. decision to lay down a generation-screwing dose of shock and awe on the already massively f****d people of Iraq. I mean, Freedom Fries?!

I don’t know that King John at Runnymede had that kind of semantic b.s. in mind when he momentously (if a little reluctantly) signed that piece of parchment in 1215. Freedom is not an invention, and neither a discovery. It’s like oxygen. But here in the States, where it is as ubiquitous as actual oxygen, “Freedom” has the same spoken narcoleptic firepower as the words “beige” or “Jimmy Fallon”.

Freedom is the Magna Carta and the Bill of Rights and Dr. King’s defiant march from Selma to Montgomery, and is absolutely central to every incandescent quality that makes us unique among the animals, that makes us human.

So, Conservatives? I understand that not many of you are raging bags of homophobic racism, but a few of you are. Dump the crackers in the public square. They’re screwing your mission.

In exchange, maybe some day soon we Libs will stop glad-handing the Lorax.

I have yet to meet a Vernal Pool Fairy Shrimp that merits starving out a hard-working family of humans who need the income stream the clueless arthropod shuts down just by drifting mindlessly around its stupid, little vernal pool. We’re the paragons, not this dumb, little cross-eyed shrimp.

Time and the universe stretch out forever. The shrimp will be back, as will we. Let’s get real.

Final nagging note to Conservatism from a smug Liberal weenie. You’re right – the Freedom of the human being is and should be our Grail, and all barriers to its hegemony should be thrown aside. But Freedom isn’t curbed by policy that reaches out to the dispossessed. On the contrary. To put this in awkwardly scriptural terms, the means to Freedom is to Freedom itself as John the Baptist was to the Savior. Just sayin’.

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Congratulations to Terry Ryken for Joining Compass!

Compass is excited to announce that Terry Ryken has joined Compass in Montecito! Terry has made his career as a Santa Barbara real estate broker serving the Montecito, Hope Ranch, Santa Barbara and Santa Ynez Valley, and built his reputation on his genuine enthusiasm to meet his clients needs.

Terry’s commitment to go above and beyond his clients expectations and bring A Positive Approach to reaching client’s goals, makes him the perfect addition to the team!

ABOUT COMPASS in New York City, the Hamptons, Miami, Boston, Los Angeles, and Washington, DC. Compass provides comprehensive brokerage services, combining exceptional agents with best-in-class technology to make the process of buying, selling, or renting a home intelligent and seamless

Terry Ryken | 805.896.6977 TerryRyken.com | terry.ryken@compass.com compass.com 805.253.7700

compass

compassinc

compass

Compass is a licensed real estate broker (01991628) in the State of California and abides by Equal Housing Opportunity laws. All material presented herein is intended for informational purposes only.

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ON REAL ESTATE

by Steve Decker Steve Decker is the Owner/Broker of Decker Realty, Inc., a company doing business as NextHome Preferred Properties and T3 Property Management. A boutique, technology based real estate brokerage serving Santa Barbara and San Luis Obispo Counties. As a 46-year veteran of the real estate industry, he has successfully pursued many areas of the industry, including brokerage, investing and development. He can be reached through NHDR.net or 805 565-3400.

By the Numbers: Average Days on the Market Increasing

B

y most accounts, the real estate market on the south coast of Santa Barbara County continues to strengthen, along with markets elsewhere in the nation.

However, there is one statistic that would indicate the market is beginning to resist the price increases seen since the real estate bust of 2007/2008. That is, the average days on the market for all listings in the Santa Barbara Multiple Listing Service.

Since April 15, 2015, through March 16, 2016, the average has steadily increased from 48.5 days then to 83.4 a year later. Hitting a high of 88.1 days on February 16, 2016. The take-away from this is that sellers may have to reassess what the market will be willing to pay for their home, and it may well not be what the market would have given them pre-2007.

This does not bode well for the significant percentage of homeowners with negative equity in their homes. The Chicago metropolitan area has one of the highest percentage of homes under water, 20.5%. The San Jose, California, area boasts the lowest at 2.8%.

The good news is that the marketing and financing of real estate has been revolutionized since the real estate crash nearly a decade ago. State-of-the-art Internet services available to, and utilized by, progressive, modern real estate brokerages, streamlines the buying and selling process for clients to a level of convenience unimagined a decade ago.

Take the difficulties the new, politically inspired, lending rules have caused.

Much was made of how the new rules would add weeks to the closing process of a transaction with a loan involved. The lending industry folks told the real estate marketing folks: expect 45 days to close an escrow with a loan involved. Before all the rule changes, a 15-day escrow was possible. But, not today, they said.

However, we recently closed an escrow in 15 days, with a loan. And it was largely due to the process being streamlined by the online exchange of documents. Coupled with the willingness and commitment of loan and escrow officers.

Forget the days of chasing around to get signatures from all parties involved.

Now, documents can be signed and returned right on your smartphone or tablet.

Borrowers, too, can take advantage of obtaining documents online. Documents needed to support their credit worthiness – such as filed tax returns from the IRS. Online applications is where it’s at today in starting the process for getting a home loan. However, consumers should know the variables in levels of approvals given out by lenders.

There is the “Pre-Approval Letter” and then there is the Desktop Underwriter (DU) Approval, a computer application available to mortgage brokers. The DU Approval is the one you want when setting out to find that special new home. It is the step just before final, full loan approval. It helps lenders make informed credit decisions on conventional, non-conforming, and government loans.

The “Pre-Approval Letter” does not rise to the level of lender commitment a buyer should have to successfully negotiate a purchase. Especially when there might be competing buyers on the same property.

When submitting an offer to purchase real estate, the Pre-approval letter, along with the DU Approval shows sellers your financial situation does meet guidelines for the level of borrowing proposed. It also shows sellers you are working with a lender who goes the extra mile in making sure you, the buyer, are well-qualified.

Sellers are well-advised, by knowledgeable agents, that buyers with DU Approvals are far less likely to fall out of escrow and fail to close.

The caveat to DU Approvals is that it does not always guarantee ultimate full loan approval. Ultimate loan approval will come through analysis by the real loan underwriter for the lender. Final approvals are always subject to the preliminary title report, property appraisal and all information supplied by the borrower being verified. Because if information fed into the system proves inaccurate, the approval could be declined.

So, from marketing homes to the world, to making sure the closing occurs in a timely and smooth manner, it is the Internet and the many wonderful tools available to agents, committed to serving their clients’ needs in the best manner possible, that wins the day in today’s real estate market.

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Just Listed! 4bd, 3ba $1,875,000 2727 E Valley Rd, Montecito

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Sunday April 10th, 1-5pm Special Live Musical Guest: Chris Fossek

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Todd Bollinger & Kimberly Sky

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AmericanRivieraBank.com 805.965.5942

better Mortgages. better Loans. better Accounts. better Service. better Online banking.

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CUSTOMER APPRECIATION SALE

with Mark Léisuré

Mark spends much of his time wandering Santa Barbara and environs, enjoying the simple things that come his way.

A show here, a benefit there, he is generally out and about and typically has a good time. He says that he writes “when he feels the urge” and doesn’t want his identity known for fear of an experience that is “less than authentic.” So he remains at large, roaming the town, having fun. Be warned.

Viral Fun

S MAKE HUMMUS NOT WAR PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS

Broza, an icon of Israeli music, has drawn comparisons to Leonard Cohen, Bruce Springsteen and Stevie Ray Vaughan.

Singing in English, Spanish and Hebrew, he accompanied himself with a surge of guitar sounds delivered with the force of an aural tsunami.

- LA Times

Da vid

Bro za

ome sort of mysterious virus fell your fearless correspondent recently, so we’re basically bereft of reportage on events passed. Health improved incrementally long enough to drop by the new Summer Solstice fundraiser known as the Emerald Ball, at Warren Butler’s latest event center, Warren B’s.

The old Papagallo’s looks basically the same, though some upgrades are planned, but it’s a fine space for such a soirée, which was a casual evening with the most casual of bands, Spencer the Gardener, providing the live entertainment. It’s always fun when Spencer calls out the peeps on the dance floor by name in his improvised verses for “Hey Baby, Que Pasa”, but even more fun watching the (mostly) over 40 ladies of La Boheme

run through several dance routines in the cramped quarters, followed by tantalizing tunes from DJ Darla Bea. It was enough to turn everyone green with envy – or was that just the creative costumes in keeping with the theme?

OMG! It’s EDC and TGIF TGIF, the Environmental Defense Center’s (EDC) monthly warm-weather gatherings, get going again next month in the cozy courtyard of the nonprofit’s downtown headquarters. It’s the perfect chance to hob-nob with employees of environmental organizations, local officials, and other eco-friendly folks while learning a little bit about some of the amazing environmental work being done in our community. And it also might be Santa Barbara’s best happy-

s Ali Pari

David Broza I n

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Palestinian qanun player Ali Paris

East Jerusalem, West Jerusalem MONDAY, APRIL 11 AT 8:00 PM LOCATION: LOBERO THEATRE

Israeli superstar David Broza brings his flamenco-rock sounds to the Lobero for a soulful evening of music direct from the Middle East. Performing songs from his East Jerusalem/West Jerusalem album, an exhilarating collaboration between Israeli and Palestinian musicians that combines cultures, languages, and styles into a powerful statement about coexistence, the whirlwind troubadour takes us on a folk-pop odyssey to a place where optimism endures.

TICKET INFORMATION $100 – VIP (includes a reception) | $40 - Section A | $25 - Section B (Tickets are subject to $4 per ticket Lobero facility fee)

BUY TICKETS AT THE LOBERO BOX OFFICE OR ONLINE

at http://www.lobero.com/events/david-broza/

Citation CJ Light Jet Available for Charter

Based at Santa Barbara Airport Call for Quote (805) 967-9000 www.SantaBarbaraAviation.com

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hour events. Visitors get two drink tickets for wine, beer or soft drinks, plenty of appealing appetizers from area foodies, and live music, and it only costs $15 a pop.

The only thing is that by the end of last summer, the sunken gardens at the EDC’s Garden Street digs was so packed with people, it might only be a matter of time before, as the late Yogi Berra put it, nobody goes there anymore because it’s too crowded.

The events take place 5:30-7:30 pm May 13, July 8, September 9, and October 14, and you can buy a season pass for $95 that includes your own take-home commemorative TGIF! wine glass, annual membership to EDC, six free raffle tickets per event (there are some amazing prizes donated by local companies, including Patagonia; extra drink tickets are $1 each or $5 for six), and an entry into a special end-of-season raffle for a limited edition New Belgium cruiser. Details online at www. environmentaldefensecenter.org/tgif or call 962-1622.

Stages and Screens Our local theater companies appear to share a lot of thoughts. Remember when four different organizations presented Noises Off within one season just a couple of years back?

And it’s not at all rare when shows have simultaneous runs at different venues – understandable in a big city, but perhaps not the best scheduling in a small berg such as Santa Barbara.

With the current situation, when SBCC Theatre Group offers up Proof, Ensemble Theatre Company presents the area debut of Bad Jews and Ventura’s Rubicon Theater hosts the American premiere of eXtras – all between April 13 and May 1.

Now this: Emails announcing new managing directors at two local theater companies arrived within hours of each other last month. Both are women, too. It seems Ensemble has appointed Jill Seltzer to its new position that will work in partnership with ETC’s executive artistic director on the company’s next phase of development, while Jennifer Schwartz is taking over

a similar position at PCPA Theaterfest, which stages its productions in Solvang and Santa Maria. Seltzer served as executive director of Screen Actors Guild Foundation, where she spearheaded the development of the Actors Center in New York City, before working as a nonprofit management consultant, while Schwartz held financial and administrative positions at San Jose Repertory Theatre, SFJAZZ, the San Francisco Film Society, and Yale Repertory Theatre.

Good luck to both. And may we please suggest seeing if the production schedules can be staggered? Thanks, much.

Catch the Wave The Wave Film Festival, Santa Barbara International Film Festival’s off-season entries focusing on cinema from one specific country or region, has confirmed the dates for the next two editions. Pan-Asian films get the nod for next month’s Wave, running May 11-15, while French film gets another go-round July 13-17. The screenings all take place at the Riviera Theatre, up on APS, which is also home to SBIFF’s monthly Cinema Society events, which wraps up the current season in June. And we’re fewer than four months away from when SBIFF will begin selling passes to the 2017 festival, slated for February 1-11, discounted 25 percent in the month of August. Call 963-0023 or visit www.sbiff.org.

UCSB CHAMPIONS OF PUBLIC SERVICE Friday, April 29, 7 p.m.

UCSB Corwin Pavilion Brought to you by the UC Santa Barbara Alumni Association and the Walter H. Capps Center for the Study of Ethics, Religion and Public Life

A World of Inspiration Meet Gauchos who made their mark in the international arena at a panel discussion featuring distinguished alumni panelists Panelist Barbara Bodine ’70

Panelist Giandomenico Picco MA ’71

• Personal design consultation • Creative decorating ideas

Barbara Bodine `70, Marc Grossman `73, Giandomenico Picco MA `71 and Joseph C. Wilson `71.

The Long and Short of It In non-SBIFF film news, Network Medical’s short-film contest is underway. All are encouraged to submit a film that conveys the contest theme “Love Triumphs” in three minutes or fewer – however that shows up for the filmmaker.

There are separate age categories for 13-19 and 20 and above, and the winners will have their films shown at the Granada Theatre on May 19 at Network’s Medical annual fundraiser “Through the Lens”. Films due by midnight Saturday, April 30. For details and entry requirements, call 967-9096.

8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

Panelist Marc Grossman ’73

Panelist Joseph C. Wilson ’71

Find out how they climbed the ranks in the foreign service to become major policy makers at key points in our global history.

Pre-Event VIP Reception: Meet our panelists before the main event at Mosher Alumni House at 5:30 p.m.

REGISTER for the main panel event and the pre-event VIP reception at

www.allgauchoreunion.com .

Be inspired.

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8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

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Obsessed With: THE EXTRAORDINARY PONY

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ometimes, we get caught up comparing ourselves to others. We forget to look within, to notice what unique strengths we have to offer the world. It’s nice to have a reminder, which is why we love author, artist, and mommy of two Alana Clumeck’s precious story, The Extraordinary Pony. She has written and illustrated a sweet tale that reminds us to never stop chasing our dreams – a timeless message that rings true for adults and kids alike.

The Extraordinary Pony by Alana Clumeck (805) 403-6405 • Instagram: @alanaclumeckart • www.alanaclumeck.com

Sugar and Spice ...A

everything nice, that’s what the Sentinel is made of. Let us indulge with the first poem ever submitted in I Heart SB by artist Melissa Esposito, a climb to the top of Grass Mountain for mad poppy and blue lupine love, flying high with SB Helicopter president Eric Haymes, a tender-hearted story called The Extraordinary Pony by artist Alana Clumeck, an award-winning cocktail by Chris Burmeister of the Outpost, and more.

And we know of all these wonderful people, places, and things because we hear them from you, dear readers. Please keep us posted on the goods by email to megan@ santabarbarasentinel.com or reaching out via Instagram: @santabarbarasentinel. Look forward to hearing from you!

ONTHESPOT:

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the

BerryMan

by Cory Clark

The Berry Man, Inc. is a wholesale produce distributor supplying produce and artisanal products to restaurants, resorts, institutions, caterers, and markets from Big Sur to Santa Barbara to Santa Monica. While sourcing worldwide, special emphasis is on the locally grown. Cory Clark is sales and marketing director of The Berry Man, Inc. and the voice of this sponsored column, The Berry Man.

MONOCROPPING: LIVING ON THE EDGE

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ost everyone has heard of the Irish Potato Famine but not everyone knows the story behind it. Also known as “The Great Hunger”, it was a time of mass starvation, disease, and emigration in Ireland. During the 1800s, the Irish addressed feeding their growing population by planting potatoes – only one variety.

When environmental conditions changed in the mid-1800s, that variety became susceptible to a disease that swept the country and decimated the crops.

Lack of variation in the potatoes that were grown contributed to the severity of the famine and crushed Ireland’s population and economy. The same variety was planted year after year. Since potatoes can be propagated with only one parent gene, the future generations were all clones.

As is the case with human and animal genetics, those with the greatest diversity are the most adaptable and have the highest survival rates. Had there been a variation of genes from different potato varieties, there would have been a greater chance of those different strains inheriting resistance to the disease and thus surviving. The potato famine is an illustration of what can happen when one crop is planted year after year, also known as monoculture.

Unfortunately, it seems we did not learn the lessons from this story because monoculture is not a thing of the past – Industrial Ag still engages in monocropping.

The three most popular crops grown in the U.S. today are corn, soybeans, and wheat. All are grown according to this method, and there is great incentive to do so.

Farmers who plant these crops receive huge subsidies from the U.S. government, and their crops end up in a vast array of products and livestock feed. These crops account for half of all farmed land in the U.S. and rely heavily on pesticides and synthetic fertilizers.

In monocrops, synthetic fertilizers are used to add nutrients back into the soil.

These are nitrogen, phosphorus, or potassium-based and their origin is often petroleum. Growing only the same crops over and over, using only the same nutrients over and over, causes the soil to lose its fertility. It drains it of nutrients that are needed for future use. Monocropping violates the rules of crop rotation by simply planting the same crop year in and year out. Adding insult to injury, the barren soil becomes host to many pests, making it an inhospitable growing environment for all agriculture.

One of the most serious environmental effects of commercial fertilizer use is water pollution. All bodies of water are affected by synthetic fertilizer runoff. Excess amounts of nitrogen and phosphorus in the soil runs off with groundwater, creating dead zones in the ocean where no life is found due to decreases in oxygen levels.

Soils are one of the world’s most precious commodities. Without soils, there would be no support for life on this planet. The fact that the world’s population is forecast to rise to from its current 5.8 billion to 8 billion by 2025, with a huge increase in demand for food, highlights the reason why soils need to be preserved.

In order to keep soil healthy, farmers relied on crop rotation. In nature, rotating crops allows the soil to be restored by adding back minerals that have been leached by previous crops. For instance, alternating vegetable crops with legumes can restore nitrogen to the depleted soil. We might not be headed for a famine such as Ireland’s, but it is important to note that monocultures are a continuing cycle for loss. Inevitably, the nutrients or “soil food” is exhausted and nature cannot feed herself.

Is this all just gloom and doom, or is this reversible?

Looking to the future, there are many possible ways to create a sustainable and secure food system. Healthy farming practices and sustainable agriculture hold great promise for creating systems that regenerate rather than deplete. By preserving heirloom strains, planting native crops, and supporting small local farmers, we can create a food movement as diverse and rich as the soil itself.

Want to make a difference? You can! Look into your pantry. If you would be willing to cut back on processed food, you can make a difference. This is where most of our corn wheat and soy goes!

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CAUSE & EFFECT...

HELPING THOSE WHO HELP US

AL FRESCO WITH ANGELS FOSTER CARE

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his organization plucks our heartstrings.

Angels Foster Care has worked with abused, abandoned, and neglected infants and toddlers born in Santa Barbara County for a decade – 90 percent of the children coming from birth parents who struggle with alcohol, drug problems, and homelessness.

The organization has successfully placed 186 children in loving foster families and forever homes since its inception. You can contribute to the organization with donations or by attending the 5th annual luncheon “Al Fresco Afternoon on the Riviera” at the Four Seasons Biltmore Resort. Jewelry, home goods, fashion accessories, skin care and make-up, and more will be available at the “Angels Marketplace” before the luncheon, then you will dine on European faire while enjoying a fashion show with styles from local stores and designers such as Angel Montecito, Roger Canamar Couture, J. McLaughlin, and Whiskey & Leather. All proceeds from the luncheon support the agency’s foster care program.

C&E...

Angels Foster Care hosts 5th annual luncheon event “Al Fresco Afternoon on the Riviera” Friday, April 22, from 11 am to 3 pm Four Seasons Biltmore Resort 1260 Channel Drive, Santa Barbara Tickets are $150 per person, or $1,500 for a table of 10, and may be reserved by visiting www.angelsfostercare.org/events, or by calling the Angels office at (805) 884-0012.

WHAT THE FORK DO I DO WITH MACHE? ache, also known as lamb’s lettuce, is soft and velvety green. It grows in little clusters of five to six leaves attached by an edible root. The flavor is delicate and nutty. Since it is so delicate, it should only be served as a salad or garnish. Mache pairs well with herbs, spring vegetables such as morels, and light cheeses. Try a mache salad with avocado, pomegranate seeds, blood orange, and goat cheese.

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Living•SB

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by Megan Waldrep

One of SB Adventure Co.’s knowledgeable tour guides, Aaron Kreisberg. He filled us in on the ecology of Santa Cruz Island during our kayaking expedition and took us safely through rough waters for cave exploration. (Photo by SB Adventure Company)

ENTER THE FOG

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e’re 30 minutes into the mist.

Waves crash portside and starboard, sending bits of ocean over the bow, deck, and surprising us and other voyagers hunkered down on the stern. Two seasick passengers receive compassion from other travelers as they try to hold it together. Ginger chews are passed and advice to keep focus on the horizon is exchanged.

The Island Adventure ferry, all 65 feet of her, charges through the sea, taking us to the place our collective hearts desire. Although the dense haze blocked a magnificent view from the California coast that morning, we know Santa Cruz Island lies ahead, anticipating explorers to delve into its nooks and crannies. Another soggy greeting from the sea motivates us inside the galley. We sit with our Santa Barbara Adventure Company tour guides, Marc Kaplan and Aaron Kreisberg, on a long booth in front of the galley bar and trade Channel Island stories. Who’s been where and what’s on our Channel Island to-do list.

Ten minutes before launching to shore, we head to the bow to take in the view. We exchange giggly pardon-me’s with other passengers as we bump into one another on our way up front. We steady ourselves on the bow and bathe in the spray. The sun finally makes its presence, slicing through the haze with buttery beams of light. Moments later, we break through the fog, and our eyes and mouths widen to the panoramic scene. Santa Cruz Island, in its brilliant glory and wild disposition, presents forth our landing point, Scorpion Anchorage, as if inviting us in.

PACK ‘EM UP AND MOVE ‘EM OUT We must skiff to shore. Damage to Scorpion’s pier from the last major storm makes it so. An announcement is made, and passengers excitedly head to the stern and politely fall in line. “Six people per skiff! Grab a life jacket from a crew member and make sure you have

Native Santa Barbarian Chris Dabney and the Sentinel's Megan Waldrep loving life during our sea kayaking adventure with Santa Barbara Adventure Company (Photo

by Megan Roach) Our other well-informed tour guide Marc Kaplan gave us even more fun facts about Santa Cruz and made sure we traveled swiftly and safely during rough patches. (Photo by SB Adventure Company)

all of your belongings!” I board the first boat and head in.

The crew is careful with the tide to be sure we aren’t launched violently to shore. As the skiff nears, we jump off and run toward dry sand. We place our lifejackets away from the lurching surf and head to base camp to get situated.

Base camp consists of a few picnic tables, large storage lockers – filled with paddle jackets, helmets, warm wetsuits, snorkeling gear – along with paddles and two person, sit-on-top kayaks in organized rows on the ground in front.

Our 12-person group assembles in a semi-circle while guides Marc and Aaron demonstrate safety measures and answer questions. Next, we make introductions, voicing our names, where we’re from – Los Angeles, Orange, and Marin counties, Bellingham, Washington, and Carpinteria (me) – and reveal our experience levels and expectations for the trip. Although our backgrounds vary, we’re joined together by the allure of the mighty Santa Cruz Island and her secrets that lie before.

We engage in a quick snack break, munching on goodies packed from home, then choose our vessels and

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proudly head toward the ocean. We watch the ebb and flow of the tide, as our guides launch each kayak as it becomes safe. We let the rest of our group go, then wait for our turn before slipping into our kayak and paddling past the break and into the blue.

YOU, ME, AND THE SEA “Dig, dig, dig!” my love shouts behind me, encouraging to keep forging ahead. “We’re almost to the other side!”

The ocean is powerful today. The crest of each wave pushes us toward the sky, even farther than the last, and laps the sides of the kayak as if reminders to stay alert. Blowholes, created where surf and the rocky coast meet, greet us with wet “hello’s” as we paddle through watery passageways. Our knowledgeable guides offer natural history and marine ecology throughout our journey, and each fact is met with collective “oohs” and “wows” from the group.

We forge on. The waves keep coming, pouring over the front of the kayak as we move toward another spot of curiosity.

The water isn’t threatening, as it is lively, mischievous, and playful. I pause to take in the surroundings. The hillsides are a brilliant green. Rains from the storm have set the terrain ablaze with oncedormant seedlings stretching upward to the sun. Pelicans zoom in gentle formation above and island foxes scurry in the brush on land.

We’ve made it.

We’re outside the noise and into the wild. A place for inspiration, adventure, and space to breathe and connect with ourselves and one another. Sea lions and seals bathe in the warm daylight and dance in the waters below. We skim

by divers and wave to boats in passing.

We feel tired and strong. We dream of a simple life, living on the island such as Margaret and Ira Eaton (Diary of a Sea Captain’s Wife) did so many years ago.

We never want to leave.

BACK ON SOLID GROUND It’s over too soon. Although we’ve had a full afternoon of kayaking adventures, it seems that any amount of time with the Channel Islands is never enough. We land safely on shore and bring the kayak and the rest of the gear back to base camp. A handful of precious moments allow us to explore the island on foot. An island fox struts carefree across the path in front of us. We travel to the visitors center, the Scorpion Ranch House built in 1887, and learn of early settlers who were blessed to experience these islands centuries before. We stroll hand and hand toward the camping grounds.

Happy families play in the fields and around their temporary homes. It’s the closest any of us will get to living on the island.

There’s an easy and peaceful vibe in the air as the golden sun slowly extends toward the western sky. A cool breeze blows and we breathe in deep, taking in this tranquil feeling as much as we possibly can. We look at one another and give grateful smiles for the adventure we had today. We never want to leave.

SEA KAYAKING WITH THE SANTA BARBARA ADVENTURE COMPANY 32 East Haley Street, Santa Barbara (805) 884-9283 Instagram: @sbadventure letsgo@sbadventureco.com www.SBAdventureCo.com

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Santa Barbara

Neill C. Zimmerman

Come Join Us.

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www.WeAreSB.com | 805-705-6355 | Located in La Cumbre Plaza

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PLANB by Briana Westmacott When Briana isn’t lecturing for her writing courses at UCSB and SBCC, she contributes to The Santa Barbara Skinny, Wake & Wander and Flutter Magazine. Along with her passion for writing and all things Santa Barbara, much of her time is spent multitasking through her days as a mother, wife, sister, want-to-be chef and travel junky.

Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability... usually.

ANIMAL HOUSE

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This is the oak tree that failed little Oak

other Nature can be a bitch. We had given it our all, tried every trick in the book to help the baby bird that had fallen out of the nest, but after a cold, windy night, “Oak” found his demise.

My daughter Lila discovered and named Oak on a brisk Thursday afternoon. At the base of a grandfather tree in our yard, Oak bore the appearance of being freshly hatched. His beak was moving but not much else. High in the branches above, we spied the nest that had failed him.

Panic struck my kids, “What do we do, Mom? He’s dying!”

This I could clearly see, and I also knew that the survival statistics were not in his favor. We locked up George (our dog who happens to love chicken dinner) and called the animal hotline.

THE FRENCH TOUCH

STRIPPING OFF THE WHITE GLOVES You know how this story ends. After a great deal of effort by us, it ended with a grave and tears, and a whole decorated ceremony that involved my girls sprinkling flower petals all around the fresh dirt blanket that covered Oak. It was during our moments of grieving Oak that I realized I am raising my kids with white gloves. How did this happen? How did I get this far without discussing the great evils that Mother Nature can bestow upon us with my kids? While her magic is mesmerizing, her dark side can, and will, drop us to our knees.

I learned about that dark side growing up in the country. My dad (and mom, for that matter) had a shotgun. I saw them shoot a number of animals. They were never hunters (they were actually the complete opposite of hunters; picture belly-dancing hippies), but they had to protect my three sisters and I from Mother Nature’s ways.

Rattlesnakes were the number-one culprits, with close to 10 a year that were either shot or shoveled (beheaded by my mom’s shovel in the garden). And there were times that pets had to be put down. With horses, dogs, cats, bunnies, fish, birds, and hamsters in the line-up throughout my childhood, suffering for the old or the sick needed to end. Back then, out there in the country, it wasn’t commonplace to visit the vet for this.

I will never forget the time my dad

BRIANA’S BEST BET

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he Santa Barbara Humane Society helped to guide us through caring for Oak. While we knew his baby-bird chances of survival were low, we followed the appropriate steps to care for him. If you have any animal needs, either for a pet or a wild animal, the Humane Society will have answers. Contact them at www. sbhumanesociety.org.

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had to “take care” of a raccoon family that was trying to get into our laundry room where one of our nine cats had just delivered kittens. The ‘coons were scratching the screens off the windows, tempted by the litter of tender kitten dinner inside. I didn’t actually see my dad do it, but I cried and cried knowing about it. I loved those ‘coons just like those kittens. I used to put extra scoops of cat food out for that raccoon family; thinking back, I probably contributed to the problem. Here’s the thing, once I was done crying and hating my dad for what he did, I grew an extra layer of skin. In order to protect our kittens (and my younger baby sisters too, for that matter), one ‘coon had to be sacrificed.

YOU MAY NEED EARMUFFS FOR THIS Fast-forward to today, and here I am putting my kids in a bubble. I earmuff my girls to defend them from words like “stupid” and “shut up.” Those muffled moments used to be solely saved for the F-word. I am also guilty of sheltering my kids from death, dying, disease, suffering, torture, and basically all of the other atrocities that make up half of our reality in this life.

Does it really help my children if I fast-forward through the Disney stabbing scenes? On second thought, maybe I should keep those demented Disney shots rolling and start squishing spiders right in front of my kids, rather than doing so in secret. In the aftermath of Oak’s demise, I realize that the white-glove service I am providing my children might actually be doing them a disservice.

So, here’s my new approach (kids, listen up): We live. We die. Some make it. Some, such as Oak, don’t. We are lucky and blessed to have food on our table and healthy bodies to process it.

Most of all, we should be grateful to Mother Nature for providing us with all of this. And I should probably not be calling her (earmuffs) a bitch, either.

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8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

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Local LIBATIONS

SPECIAL RECIPES FROM TALENTED CHEFS IN SB

QUICK BITES

CARIBBEAN COFFEE CO.

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pending several years traveling and living around the Mediterranean opened my eyes to different types of cuisine.

This tartine, an elegant word for an open-faced sandwich, is a perfect first course or side to accompany a simple salad or bowl of soup. Serves four.

A

crisp, slightly floral scent unfolds into a smooth, cool java taste with a gentle bite – more so a nibble – at the finish, this black gold from Caribbean Coffee Co. is pretty dang delicious.

Celebrating its 30th year, this organic, fair trade, robust, and roasted caffeine libation can get you through work with a buzzed smile on your face.

We poured this growler at the Chevron gas station in Montecito. Convenience – another thing we love about this business.

PEAR TARTINE Ingredients:

1 baguette ¼ cup olive oil 2 pears, thinly sliced with core in 1 cup softened cream cheese or

6 ounces French goat cheese A Taste of Ojai Lavender Sea Salt or your favorite sea salt Cracked black pepper

Directions:

Preheat your stovetop grill pan over medium heat. Cut baguette into slices and brush with a little oil. Grill bread until lightly charred and toasty. Brush pear slices with a little olive oil and grill the slices for 1 to 2 minutes on each side.

Preheat oven to 400°F. Arrange toasted bread on a baking sheet. Spread with cream cheese or a bit of goat cheese and arrange grilled pear slices slightly overlapping one another. Season with A Taste of Ojai Lavender Sea Salt and cracked pepper; heat in oven for 3-4 minutes. Serve on a wood board with a drizzle of local honey or balsamic glaze.

Caribbean Coffee Co. 495 Pine Avenue, Suite A, Goleta (805) 692-2200 Instagram: @caribbeancoffee www.caribbeancoffee.com

Raising the Bar

RED HEADED LORETTA 1.5 oz. Johnnie Walker Black 0.75 oz. Lustau Amontillado Sherry

FAVORITE BARTENDERS AND SERIOUS COCKTAILS

his baby is a winner. Literally. The Outpost’s lead cocktail savant, Chris Burmeister, has been chosen as a Western Regional finalist in the U.S. Bartenders Guild’s World Class Competition – a global rivalry to find the world’s best bartender– with this exact drink. Try his winning entry cocktail at the Outpost or Good Bar and tell them the Sentinel sent you!

by Madeline Ward

FREE SPRINKLER NOZZLES

F

ree efficient sprinkler nozzles are available for City water customers. 1) Go to www.FreeSprinklerNozzles. com and print out voucher. 2) Pick up your free nozzles at a local irrigation store. 3) Put in the easy-to-install nozzles and start saving water!

0.5 oz. Apricot Brandy 1 dash Orange Bitter 1 dash Angostura Bitter Garnish – Lemon twist

Directions: Combine all ingredients in a mixing glass with 5-6 small square ice cubes and stir until properly diluted. Strain into 6-oz. coupe or cocktail glass and garnish with a lemon twist.

T

WATERWISE

Private Chef Robin

Robin Goldstein, known as “Private Chef Robin” to her clientele, cooks for special events and private parties.

To book: (805) 284-4264 www.privatechefrobin.com Find her salt infusions at The Santa Barbara Company, C’est Cheese, Isabella Gourmet Foods, the Santa Barbara Winery Tasting Room, Porch on Santa Claus Lane, and Viva Oliva in Montecito.

Outpost 5650 Calle Real, Goleta Instagram: @outpostsb • www.outpostsb.com

SweetSpot:

THE

FASHION OASIS

I

t feels like a home. A very cool and stylish home. I see familiar names. Local designers such as Make Smith Leather Co., Joah Brown, and Ace Rivington hang near other mutually desirable labels for men and women in the skylighted space. Walking in this sweet spot makes me want to slip in one of Whiskey & Leather’s fine goods to fit in with its effortlessly cool surroundings and take a selfie.

Whiskey & Leather 1101 Coast Village Road, Suite A, Santa Barbara (805) 770-5155 Instagram: @whiskeyleather • www.whiskeyleather.com

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#ARTCHANGEDMYLIFE with

JOIN TODAY AND RECEIVE A $100 DISCOUNT TO MCASB’S ANNUAL SPRING BENEFIT & ART AUCTION DISRUPTION: 50 STATES Date & Time: Wednesday, April 27, 6 – 9 pm Afterparty: 9:30 pm - Midnight Location: The Goodland Hotel, 5650 Calle Real (Valet Parking) Engaging all of the senses through sound, sight, taste and touch, conceived by artist XAVIERA SIMMONS, this cinematic evening will feature thought provoking moments, interludes, films, and performances in four chapters.

For more information, visit http://mcasantabarbara.org/event/disruption Members recieve a discount only at the National ticket level

DISRUPTION: 50 STATES DISRUPTION is a highly anticipated, ticketed event that supports the Museum of Contemporary Art Santa Barbara (MCASB) and our world-class exhibitions and free public programs. DISRUPTION: 50 States features an immersive experience engaging all of the senses through sound, sight, taste and touch conceived by artist Xaviera Simmons. Elle Magazine recently named Xaviera one of the most brilliant, unexpected, and powerful women in art right now. The evening also includes a musical performance by Ifé & Danny; a special DJ set by Talib Kweli; a boutique auction of important contemporary artworks, and cocktails and hors d’oeuvres.

CONCEIVED BY ARTIST XAVIERA SIMMONS

BECOME A MEMBER!

MCASB MEMBER BENEFITS EXTENDED TO ALL MEMBERSHIP LEVELS: • Personalized membership card • Being the first to know about upcoming exhibitions and events • Member discount on ticketed events • Invitation to the annual member party • North American Reciprocal Museum Program (Free access to 820 institutions) • Access to Artist Development Workshops • One complimentary MCASB Publication

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE

BY IFÉ & DANNY

MEMBERSHIP LEVELS: Deluxe ($150) – Includes all the above as well as early bird notification of Bring your own Art Night (BYOA) and two complimentary drink tickets at Curated Cocktails, MCASB’s popular First Thursday event

SPECIAL DJ SET

BY TALIB KWELI

Premium ($250) – Includes all the above as well as a 20% discount to the museum store and four complimentary drink tickets to Curated Cocktails.

Platinum ($500) – Includes all the above as well as an invitation to VIP preview receptions for each exhibition and and one complimentary limited edition art print.

Join today by visiting us online or by calling or emailing Christopher Martinez, Development Manager at development@mcasantabarbara.org • 805.966.5373 x107.

MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART SANTA BARBARA 653 Paseo Nuevo, Upper Arts Terrace, Santa Barbara | (805) 966-5373 Instagram: @MCASantaBarbara | www.mcasantabarbara.org

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the

5 ThingsYouDidn’tKnowAbout:

Q&A

ERIC HAYMES

H

e flies like an eagle. Higher, actually, and does it VIP style. When president of Santa Barbara Helicopters Eric Haymes isn’t up in the air, you can find him at the beach, the desert, or sliding down a mountain in skis or a snowboard. He told us that the helicopter [shown here] was purchased from a wealthy owner in the UK who was close friends with Prince Charles and Camilla, often flying the couple to polo events. Not too shabby. Learn more about President Haymes below.

1. I took my first helicopter ride at a county fair at age 11.

Cost my best friend and I the outrageous sum of $10 (each).

Was worth every penny. Who knew what it would one day lead to... good thing we didn’t spend our hard-earned money on the Tilt-A-Whirl or Ferris wheel or I might have just as easily become a carnie.

2. I was in the music business for years before migrating into aviation. I’ve owned several large recording studios and a postproduction video edit facility and directed a number of music videos back when MTV and VH-1 actually played music videos. Most of that is now in my rear-view mirror, but I still have a decent guitar collection and enjoy music much more now that there’s no commerce attached to it. Music is a harsh mistress.

WITH

I

MATTHEW HEALY OF THE 1975

t seems to be a British Invasion tradition to bring colorful pop and rock to the U.S. and The 1975 continues to carry the torch. Two years ago, they won an award for most tours in one year out of any band in the last 10 years (well over 200 shows) and continue to bring their experience to venues around the world. Lead singer Matty Healy sat down with us to relay some The 1975 particulars. For best results, read answers in a friendly British accent. (Follow the band on Instagram: @the1975 or the1975.com)

3. Decided Santa Barbara area needed a helicopter charter service to link it with the rest of Southern California and the mid-coast. I never tire of flying along the coast and over such beautiful scenery. The view from up there is absolutely world-class.

4. I spend most of my time trading commercial aircraft. Mainly Boeing and Airbus airliners. I love my work. The helicopter charter business is a sideline business that I enjoy immensely.

5. I am raising a young son by myself. It’s probably the hardest, best thing I have ever done. He’s amazing (but he, without fail, falls asleep in the back of the helicopter within minutes of taking off. Kids these days… go figure.)

Santa Barbara Helicopters (310) 623-2032 • www.santabarbarahelicopters.net

Q: Have you been to Santa Barbara? If so, what did you get to experience?

A: We love Santa Barbara. It’s beautiful and it’s where all the pretty people are.

Aw, thanks! We like to think so. What was the first concert you ever went to?

The first major concert I went to was Michael Jackson in 1996. It was a huge moment for me, because it was the first time I saw him as a human and not just some major pop star. It was a moment that changed my life, really.

Take a Hike GRASS MOUNTAIN

M

y legs burn and sweat drips down the back of my neck. I’ve been climbing well over an hour uphill – almost vertical, it seems at times. But I keep on. The images I’ve seen on Instagram keep playing in my head – an orange spectacle I could see from below as I drove my car on Figueroa Mountain Road. After a long while, I reach the top, wipe the sweat off my brow and turn around. The Santa Ynez Valley outstretches before me, and bursts of poppies and blue lupine blanket the mountain. The scent is sweet, and the air is clear. Well worth the climb.

Directions: From Santa Barbara, CA 154. Travel toward Los Olivos and turn right on Figueroa Mountain Road. After a few miles, look for parking for the trail around the curve in the road. The trailhead is to the right of the creek.

For more information on Grass Mountain, visit www.backpacker.com.

What’s the best advice you’ve ever gotten?

Let me see if I get the wording correctly. Don’t treat your old material like it’s from your past. Treat it like the artist you are today. Like, if it’s a message that still rings true to you, but may sound quite juvenile as it is, work on it like the person and artist that you are now.

Do you have a routine before going on stage?

No, not really. We just like to f*** around, that’s all. Once we get on stage, we’re very serious, but once we are off the stage, we like to f*** off.

Favorite song to play live?

It varies all the time but right now, I’m really into performing “Paris”.

What’s the biggest goal you’d like to reach?

I would like to be president of the United States of America.

I think it would kick ass at it. Matty 2020. That has a nice ring to it.

The 1975 at Santa Barbara Bowl Thursday, April 21, 7 pm 1122 North Milpas Street, Santa Barbara Box office: (805) 962-7411 www.sbbowl.com Photo Credit: Roger Deckker

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ARTBEAT

8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

Animal House

by jacquelyn De Longe

Jacquelyn’s creative interests earned her a degree in fine art from Art Center College of Design, followed by years in the Los Angeles art world working for major galleries and prominent artists. She is regularly published in West Coast newspapers and magazines, in addition to working as a producer and director in the performing arts. She is an advocate for children’s art programs and, she is not afraid to dance down the aisle at the grocery store with her kids when Talking Heads plays overhead. Contact Jacquelyn at www.delongewrites.com.

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YAY FOR YORKIES!

A

THE TOE-TAPPING CIRCUS ROLLS INTO TOWN FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY

R

hythm Circus is taking over the UCSB’s Campbell Stage with live toe-tapping beats and choreography. This traveling cruelty-free circus (no animals here!) incorporates funky sounds, a big brass band, beatboxing, tap dance, themed costumes, and singing in Feet Don’t Fail Me Now. A show full of energy and movement, executive director and performer Nick Bowman describes, “On the Surface, we are a group of 11 touring performers.

Four tap dancers and seven musicians, with the brass meets funk meets soul sound. Throw in the most incredible beat boxer you’ve ever imagined and a whole lot of hair flying around, and you start to get an idea of what we do… The best feeling in the world for me is to stand in the wings after the show – dripping with sweat and trying to catch my breath – watching people literally dancing up the aisles as they leave the theater. For Nick Bowman shuffles and hops, bringing the crowd me, as a dancer, there can be no bigger to its collective feet reward than infecting an audience with Everybody Dance Now, Kelli Forman, the passion and excitement I feel for the of the impact of the performing arts, music I’ve been dancing to… We grew particularly dance, in our modern up watching Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, society and here is what she had to say: and the Nicholas brothers. Inspired by “Dance performance is unique, in that their style of dance, we are not afraid no matter what the setting, it transcends to show off a flashy combination of tap language and cultural barriers while steps or jump into the splits.” simultaneously communicating The collaborative spirit of Rhythm something to an audience through a Circus is extremely important to the particular dance technique, style, and show’s creative process, as every member social tone. Dance performance is similar contributes to the creation of each to all visual art in that when we ask each piece. The music transitions across audience member how they interpreted genres including blues, rock, funk, a dance piece, each would describe the R&B, salsa, reggae, and jazz. The band work through one’s personal lenses that plays an integral part of the production, one have gathered over one’s lifetime.” challenging the dancers who push right She breaks down the importance of back, playing off the energy and beat. dance in our lives: “Dance can offer “As for the dance, we celebrate tap dance the following gifts to a person: unique as a percussive art form. We consider expression, release of physical tension, our floor to be our drum. But as much exercise and good health, the unbinding as we love the art and heritage of our of emotions, freedom to be playful, dance form, we also love to entertain,” mental clarity, correct posture, empathy explains Bowman. for others, discipline, and a cultural For Rhythm Circus, rave reviews have identity. Who wouldn’t want to reap been rolling in for this show since their dance’s many benefits?” first performance in 2008: “They bring Rhythm Circus is a great opportunity the furious funk… and tap their way for kiddos and adults to enjoy performing into everyone’s hearts!” – Star Tribune; arts at its most lively and energetic.

“Fast, Furious Footwork!” –The New Art doesn’t have to be serious, it can York Times; “A Family-Friendly Tap be fun too! Be sure to get your tickets Extravaganza!” – The New York Post. for this one-night-only, family-friendly I asked local arts advocate, instructor, performance at UCSB’s Campbell Hall and director of Santa Barbara’s on Sunday, April 17 at 3 pm.

sweet submission we are posting as is: “Trinket is a little Yorkie who belongs to our dear friends, Bud and Lynda, down the hall. Trinket loves to visit us and after she gets Charley Bear treats, she runs to her favorite place by the glass door to lie in the sun. After a short while, she goes on the patio to explore and sometimes lies there in the sun. She likes for me to rub her tummy and her ears. Her favorite thing is to eat lunch, then go for a walk – and she can run like a rabbit! She’s a sweety, and I call her Lovey.”

To see your pet in ANIMAL HOUSE/Pet of the Week, email a photo, name of pet and owners, and some fun facts to megan@santabarbarasentinel.com

properties m a r s h a kot lYa r

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SPECIALIZING IN ROLEX • CARTIER • TAG HEUER 30 YEARS EXTERIENCE • ALL BRANDS

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is Tommie Vaughn

Tommie adapted her love of the stage to the love of the page. As lead singer for the band Wall of Tom, she created This Rock in My Heart and This Roll in My Soul, a fictional book series based loosely on her experiences in the L.A. music scene. Now she’s spending her time checking out and writing about all things Santa Barbara. Reach Tommie at www.TommieV.com or follow her on Twitter at TommieVaughn1.

HENNA ME BEAUTIFUL The entire bridal party has Henna style (photo by Patrick Moyer)

H

enna is one hot ticket as we move into wedding season here in Santa Barbara. From lady B Beyoncé to Gigi Hadid, Henna is in tight with the “It” crowd. I’ve loved adorning myself with Henna for years and when I met the incredibly talented Afshan Khan, owner of Henna Me Beautiful here in the 805, I knew with her skills and background the sky was the limit when it came to my creative imagination. Just watching Afshan work, so meticulously, so patiently, I was lost in wonder at her artistry and wanted to know more about the beautiful art form that is Henna.

Q. Tell me about the history of the art of Henna.

A. Henna, also known as Mehndi, has been around for centuries and has been used throughout many different cultures. The use dates as far back as about 3400BC and earliest signs of use come from Egypt. Henna has been used in many cultures throughout history to celebrate life’s joyous occasions as well as mourn the dead, for religious reasons or to ward off bad spirits. The application has changed throughout history as well. In earlier times, it could have been applied on the hair and soles of the feet to help regulate body temperature and cool the body down during the hot desert days in countries in the Middle East. It may have been applied in thick patterns with the use of a stick or similar tool that would be dipped in the Henna and then applied.

As times changed and newer ideas were introduced, cones allowed for it to be applied in intricate detailed patterns.

Henna is known more commonly as Mehndi in Pakistan and India, where it is used mainly to adorn brides on their wedding day, as well as close relatives and guests, and also for holidays and celebrations. It was introduced to the western world through celebrities such as Madonna back in the ‘90s. Since then, countless celebrities including Ariana Grande, and most recently Beyoncé (in Coldplay’s music video “Hymn for the weekend”) and Gigi Hadid (originally a Montecito local, who I had the pleasure of Henna’ing at the end of last year) have brought Henna into the spotlight.

Today, it has spread to every corner of the world and is used for any and every occasion, including weddings, holidays, birthdays, corporate events, and the more uniquely prenatal Henna and Henna crowns to help women going through chemo.

How and why did you become a Henna artist?

Becoming a Henna artist was part of a family tradition in our home growing up. My mother learned the art of Mehndi growing up in Pakistan and taught it to my sister and me at a very young age. We grew up doing it for friends and family for holidays, celebrations, weddings, and any other special occasion. It was more of a hobby and I never intended for it to become my career. I went to college and got

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how well you care for it. Everyone stains differently, some darker than others and different parts of the body stain differently as well.

Traditional or multi-cultural weddings are hot with Henna (photo by Patrick Moyer)

my B.S. in Interior Design. While I was in college, I got married and soon after I graduated I became a mother. I decided to dedicate myself to my kids and become a stay-at-home mom. After my second child, I needed an artistic outlet and returned to my Henna. More and more friends began asking me to do their Henna and eventually, with much support from my husband, family, and friends, I opened my own business.

With destination weddings being hot in Santa Barbara, bridal Henna has become my area of expertise but I am also available for parties as well as private appointments.

How does Henna work and how long does it typically last?

Henna is an ephemeral and centuries’ old traditional form of body art. It can be applied on the skin using cones, lacquer bottles, or sticks. It can also be used to dye hair naturally as well as used on the nails for a natural nail color. Typically it is made from dried and ground henna leaves which come from the henna plant, aka Intermis Lasomia, mixed with sugar, water, or lemon juice and essential oils. I use a cone that I make myself by rolling sheets of cellophane into a cone shape. I then fill the cone with Henna paste and tape it shut. When I am ready to use it, I snip the closed tip to allow the Henna to exit the cone. I then free hand designs on the clients’ body. Henna lies on top of the skin and is not injected. Once it has dried, you remove it by picking it off or using something with a hard edge, such as a credit card, to scrape it off.

You will notice that the Henna has an orangey stain, but over the next 24-48 hours it will darken to a dark reddishbrown. Natural Henna can get very dark brown if it is well cared for. Your artist will usually supply you with after care instructions. It can last from a few days to two weeks or more! It really all comes down to body chemistry and

Henna parties are hot right now. What does a party cost and what do you include?

With the rise of fusion weddings and destination weddings in Santa Barbara, Henna parties have become quite hot. The rate to book a henna party is $95.00/hr. It includes a happy, energetic artist as well as enough Henna for your party guests for the time requested, and all associated materials are provided, including after-care sealant and instructions. Glitter is available upon request! All of the designs are applied free-hand and free-style. Each design is a unique piece of art. The simpler the designs, the more guests that can be Henna’d in an hour; the heavier the designs, the fewer guests I can accommodate in the hour. Henna is a great way to take an average party and make it memorable! Your party guests get to leave with a party favor that they can wear for the following week. Henna is great for events and celebrations from weddings, bridal showers, bachelorette parties, quinceaneras, sweet sixteens, birthdays, belly blessings, corporate events, and more!

Why Henna? What is it that your customers love about it?

Henna is a fun way to express yourself through body art. My clients love everything about it! It is fun to have someone draw on you; it’s similar to having someone play with your hair or do your makeup. It’s a fun sensation and it’s temporary. It’s also very therapeutic.

I mix essential oils with my Henna and once I begin applying it, those oils begin filling the space around us. If you watch the designs being applied, it is so soothing to the eyes. We are blessed to be living in Santa Barbara and almost anywhere we decide to do the Henna it is usually a beautiful day. Combine the scents, sounds, motions, and aesthetics and quickly the atmosphere becomes therapeutic. Many times I get clients who are celebrating a momentous occasion in their life like the welcoming of a baby, a wedding or a birthday as well as some who are soul searching or may chose to include the name of a family member.

Afshan is available on all the social networking sites (search for Henna Me Beautiful) if you are interested in reserving her Henna talents for your next party, but do it soon because with her beautiful artistry, she is in high demand. www. hennamebeautiful.com, (805) 633-0778, or contact@hennamebeautiful.com

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Behind the Vine

by Hana-Lee Sedgwick

Hana-Lee Sedgwick is a writer, wine consultant and lover of all things wine and food. As a Certified Specialist of Wine and Sommelier, she loves to explore the world of wine in and around her hometown of Santa Barbara. When not trying new wines or traveling, she can be found practicing yoga, cooking, entertaining and enjoying the outdoors. Visit her popular blog, Wander & Wine, for wine tips, tasting notes and adventures in wine and travel: wanderandwine.com

KEEPING A LO-FI PROFILE

I

t’s always cool to meet people in the wine industry who are doing their own things on their own terms.

Recently, I met with winemaker Michael Roth, one-half of the small Santa Barbara County wine label, LoFi, which he established in 2013 with longtime friend Craig Winchester. LoFi is a partnership between two friends who believe that wine should be enjoyed with food, on any given day, without having to spend a fortune. Kudos to that!

While working at a wine shop during college in North Carolina, Michael became so interested in wine that he decided to move to Napa after college to pursue a career in wine. After working several years at noteworthy producers such as Saddleback Cellars and Grgich Hills Estate, Michael moved to the Santa Barbara area, where he took a job

Craig Winchester and Michael Roth, two of a kind in the name of wine

Chenin Blanc is among Lo-Fi’s wines

at Koehler Winery. A few years later, he worked at Demetria Estate before joining Martian Ranch & Vineyard as the head winemaker. Craig, a close friend from college who also got into wine, joined him at Martian Ranch not long after.

Together, Michael and Craig hit their stride while at Martian Ranch, gaining notoriety for producing a fresher, more delicate and low-alcohol style of wine. For Lo-Fi, they strive to keep that freshness front and center, using a more minimalist approach to keep the wine young and vibrant. Utilizing natural winemaking practices by shying away from yeast and added tannins, the duo use neutral oak, little to no sulfur and carbonic maceration (a process for fermenting whole grapes without the use of yeasts) to keep that raw freshness.

The philosophy behind Lo-Fi is that wine is a lot like music; hence, the two deciding to name the label after a

musical term (low-fidelity, a.k.a. lo-fi, is a term for a technical flaw in a sound recording). Just like music, wine can be filled with “resonance, distortion, simplicity, modesty, intimacy, and ingenious integrity of the natural process.” For Lo-Fi, the goal isn’t to create wine that is too polished or perfect, but rather, wine that embraces its more natural, raw expression.

In a world of wine scores and the quest for perfection, it’s an admirable approach to winemaking and one that is garnering them lots of good attention!

In fact, Michael was named one of the San Francisco Chronicle’s Winemakers to Watch in 2015.

Lo-Fi wines, including varietals such as Chenin Blanc, Cabernet Franc, and Cinsault, are indeed soulful and unique.

These aren’t the types of wines that are meant to be cellared for years, but instead lend themselves to everyday drinking.

Not only are the wines affordable (bottles range between $23-$28) and natural, Lo-Fi wines are interesting because they don’t taste identical to every other bottle out there. Remember, Michael and Craig aren’t seeking perfection – but by doing so, they’ve created perfectly unique Santa Barbara County wines. Cheers!

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IHeart SB

8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

BY Elizabeth Rose

I Heart SB is a social experiment in dating and relationships through stories shared with and experienced by a thirty-something living in the Greater Santa Barbara area. All stories herein are based on actual events. Some names, places, and timelines have been altered to preserve anonymity and, most of all, for your reading enjoyment. Submit stories (maximum 700 words) to letters@santabarbarasentinel.com.

T

his poem was submitted by local artist and poet Melissa Esposito. To all the ladies and gentlemen who went on a great couple of dates with someone special but surprisingly never heard from that special someone again, this is for you.

              

           

     

NO RING

The sad, familiar place waiting for my hot line to bling checking no messages there’s no bells no ring the sad, familiar place waiting, expecting, hoping for a call a call back to confirm, to affirm, to assure me that it wasn’t a dream made up, conjured in my state of happiness, connected connection.

Never doubted you would call, my faith lessens every minute.

The digital clock ticks, ticks, ticks… no ring.

I look over, wondering if you’ll hear this writing and finally ring, TELE-pathic message? no, you’re not answering my call.

It’s on, checked again.

It’s on, volume’s up! no bing, no bells, no ring.

NO RING.

18+ 8+ Only

g t n i ime r p s Melissa Esposito Mae@interiortransformer.com Instagram: @interiortransformer

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8 – 22 APRIL | 2016

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

SYVSNAPSHOT

by Eva Van Prooyen

Keeping a finger on the pulse of the Santa Ynez Valley: what to eat, where to go, who to meet, and what to drink. Pretty much everything and anything situated between the Santa Ynez and San Rafael Mountains that could tickle one’s interest.

ARM WRESTLING, GUITAR SHOW, TECHNO, AND VINTNERS FEST 34TH ANNUAL SANTA BARBARA VINTNERS FESTIVAL leanse your palates and get ready to swirl, sniff, sip, and savor at the 34th Annual Santa Barbara Vintners Festival Grand Tasting, held Saturday, April 23, at the River View Park in Buellton. The Vintners Festival is the largest tasting of Santa Barbara County wines of the year with more than100 wineries and winemakers, more than 30 food purveyors and chefs, regional artists, and live music.

The Big Bottle Bash is the Festival Weekend Friday night kick-off dinner starting at 6:30 pm, served family-style, featuring an eye-widening selection of magnum and large format wines brought by and shared among the dinner guests at Presqu’ile Winery and Vineyard in the Santa Maria Valley.

The Saturday morning Syrah Seminar at the Santa Ynez Valley Marriott is just minutes from that day’s Festival Grand Tasting at the Riverview Park, and will be moderated by noted wine writer Wendy Thies Sell, featuring an in-depth exploration and tasting of Santa Barbara Country syrah as showcased by a panel of seven Santa Barbara County winemakers and grape growers; $35 plus fees per person.

In addition, $50 Vintners Visa wine-tasting passes for April 21-24 (ThursdaySunday) allow you to taste wine at up to 12 different wineries and tasting rooms along the Buellton Wine, Foxen Canyon and Santa Maria Valley, Lompoc Valley, Los Olivos Promenade, Santa Barbara Urban Wine Trail, Santa Ynez Valley, Solvang, and Santa Rita Hills – Wine Trails. For more information, visit www.sbvintersweekend.com.

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HAZARDOUS WASTE AND ELECTRONICS DROP-OFF n a free recycling event, the County will collect all types of common household hazardous waste and electronics for the unincorporated area of Santa Barbara County. (Sorry, Buellton, you have to wait until May 7.) Bring up to 15 gallons or 125 pounds of waste per trip including: automotive fluids, cleaners, paint, pesticides, fluorescent tubes, propane tanks, solvents, fertilizer, medications, needles and sharps in puncture proof containers, batteries, and electronics. Leave your biological, explosive, and radioactive materials at home (with the exception of smoke detectors). No trash or green waste will be accepted.

When: Sunday, April 10, from 9 am to 2 pm Where: Santa Ynez Valley Recycling and Transfer Station, 4004 Foxen Canyon Road in Los Olivos Cost: Free Info: (805) 882-3615 or visit www.lessismore.org

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SOIRÉE THURSDAYS very Thursday, Refugio Ranch Tasting Room is, “throwing a little bash for the Los Olivos community,” with live music, food, and wine by the glass specials for club members and industry people.

When: Thursdays from 5 pm Where: 2990 Grand Avenue, Los Olivos Info: www.refugioranch.com

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30TH ANNUAL SPRINGFEST ho can say “no” to an arm wrestling competition, barbecue shoot-out, rib cook-off, a motorcycle show, a car show, carnival, food booths, vendors, live music, and a beer garden? Vendors display a variety of goods including hair accessories, sun glasses, wood carved signs, T-shirts, marshmallow shooters, purses, engraving, fun photos, cutlery, toys, jewelry, household items, and more. Food booths support Lompoc non-profits.

When: April 15, 16, and 17 Where: Ryon Park, 800 West Ocean Avenue in Lompoc Cost: $30 at the door, $20 presale until 2 pm day of festival Info: (805) 735-8511 or visit www.lompocvalleyfestivals.com

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CENTRAL COAST GUITAR SHOW nfinished Business Productions invites music lovers to buy, sell, or trade, “all things guitar” and other musical instruments new, used, and vintage. A $5 admission fee gets you a chance to win a Fender Squire Stratocaster in Lake Placid Blue door prize. Collectors, performers, musicians, novices, and guitar riffers will find guitars, basses, amps, hand-crafted archtops, flat tops, electrics, pedals, vintage parts, engraved pickguards, neckplates… and pretty much anything music-related.

When: Saturday, April 16, from 10 am to 3 pm Where: Grange Hall, 2880 Broad Street in San Luis Obispo Cost: $5 admission fee; $1 off if you bring an instrument to trade or sell; $10 catered lunch Info: (805) 431-3067 or visit www.centralcoastguitarshow.com

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RANCHO TECHNO ancho Techno is the SYV’s monthly techno music party with electronic tunes, dancing, and an impressive list of premium beer, valley wines, and bubbles.

This month, Rancho Techno is going international, as we will have Gustin from the white island of Ibiza as our headlining guest DJ with support from Sovereign T (San Luis Obispo) and resident D.J. MacIntyre.

When: Wednesday, April 20, from 7 to close Where: Santé Wine Bar and Lounge, 433 Alisal Road in Solvang Info: (805) 691-9641

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REC & ROLL ROLLERMANIA RETURNS arks and Recreation hosts an evening of “roller skating madness and fantastic family fun” for one night only. Bring your own skates or blades, or rent onsite to roll and bounce to the disco ball, flashing lights, and music. Games, prizes, refreshments, limited rollerblade rentals, and child sizes available.

When: Friday, April 22 – ages 10 and under; 5:30 to 6:30 pm and open skate for all ages 6:30 to 8:30 pm Where: Solvang Veterans Hall, 1745 Mission Drive in Solvang Cost: $4 general admission, $6 with skates, $10 if you need blade rentals Info: (805) 688-1086 or visit www.cityofsolvang.com

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8 – 22 APRIL | 2016 |

SANTA YNEZ VALLEY...Come For The Wine…Stay For The Shopping

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the

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LOS OLIVOS

805.686.0110

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1603 Copenhagen Drive 805.686.4358

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