Born in Santa Barbara

the

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V O L 4 ISS14 JUL18 A U G 1

2015

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BORN IN SANTA BARBARA

UNLESS YOU WERE ACTUALLY BORN IN SANTA BARBARA, YOU’LL NEVER BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN A “LONGTIME RESIDENT,” SO DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO MAKE SURE YOUR LITTLE ONE IS DELIVERED BY A LOCAL BABY BUNDLER. WE HAVE TWO OPTIONS FOR YOU. (STORY ON PAGE 21)

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Content

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Lanny’s Take – Longtime resident Lanny Ebenstein details the changes within district elections involving City of Santa Barbara politics

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State Street Scribe – Congrats on Moving to the American Riviera! Where You From? Like it Matters.

T he Bi-weekly Capitalist – Jeffrey Harding scrutinizes the new Los Angeles requiring a $15 minimum wage by 2020, and he wants to know: why not make it official right now and increase it more?

Beer Guy – If you ask Zach Rosen, “What’s cooking?” be prepared for him to reply, “Beer, of course.” That’s the case when barbecuing – it’s only natural.

The Fortnight – There are no ordinary days. Plant succulents on the wall, resurrect Count Basie, get your ashes hauled to Pluto. Give Parkinson’s the finger.

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SY Valley Snapshot – Eva Van Prooyen makes her rounds throughout Santa Ynez and vicinity; her latest stops include Movies in the Park, the stars above, Vintners 5 Miler, Cachuma wildlife cruise, magician Shawn McMaster, Palmina’s 20th year, and more

P.16 P.20

Man About Town – Mark Léisuré is spewing words starting with F, dropping the F-bomb, fortnight, Fiesta Ranchera, festivals, films, and so forth (furthermore?)

The Local – Here’s The Scoop, feel the HEAT in Carp, get patient with Grasshopper, grow green with Planting Roots, sip on Deep Sea Family Wine, quick queries for Mickey Raphael, Point of View from Samy’s Camera – and there’s more where they came from

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Made in SB – You’re pregnant. Now what? We sat down with Cottage Hospital and the Santa Barbara Birth Center to get answers on their unique ways to provide the birth experience you desire.

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Food File – Irina Skoeries’s GOGO BAR not only raises the bar for “energy” nutrients, but makes Christina Enoch’s taste buds get up and go

Plan B – Briana Westmacott sizes up her sister Karrin’s love and marriage with wife Marisa – and goes into profound detail about their pending bundle of joy

I Heart SB – Words actually can hurt you: Elizabeth Rose secures a second date, but when she speaks her mind about expectations for a quality relationship, it’s all over but the crying

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Up Close – Jacquelyn de Longe rolls up her sleeves and grabs ample napkins while partaking of tacos in every nook and cranny of Santa Barbara

Cinema Scope – James Luksic unspools along with Ted 2, Me & Earl & the Dying Girl, Self/Less, Amy, and The Gallows

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Lannys take

by Lanny Ebenstein

Lanny is a longtime local resident and writer.

District Elections Change SB City Politics

T

he institution of district elections in the City of Santa Barbara changes local politics greatly. Candidates who once would have had little to no chance are now major contenders. Incumbents who once would have been shoo-ins are vulnerable. Moreover, mayoral elections, though they remain at-large, will also be affected starting in two years.

In the first city council district, comprising Santa Barbara’s eastside, Jacqueline Inda and Andria Martinez Cohen appear to be the leading candidates but with others also in the race, including Jason Dominguez and Sebastian Aldana.

In the 3rd District, representing the westside, incumbent Cathy Murillo and challenger Sharon Byrne will compete against each other in the race that will probably dominate the coming campaign.

In the second district, on the Mesa, incumbent Randy Rowse appears to be the strong favorite.

It is likely that a number of other hopefuls will also enter the races.

An individual who is now emerging as a kingmaker in local politics is longtime Santa Barbara resident Frank Banales. Frank was born in Santa Barbara and has lived here all his life. He is now being courted by a variety of candidates for votes he can deliver, particularly on Santa Barbara’s Eastside and Westside. He was the lead plaintiff in the lawsuit to create district elections; Inda and Aldana were also plaintiffs.

Having long known Jacqueline, it appears to me she is the likely favorite for the 1st District. Many people forget that she has been a candidate for office before: she ran for the Santa Barbara Board of Education in 2008. A political moderate, she is a registered Democrat and has been involved in many local organizations.

By way of contrast, Andria and Jason are new to the community. Andria has

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called Santa Barbara home for fewer than two years, and Jason has been a local resident less than one year. It seems doubtful to this writer that – in the inaugural district election – voters in the first district will elect someone who has lived in the community for such a short period of time as Martinez Cohen and Dominguez.

At the same time, party politics could play a significant role in the first district election, as Martinez Cohen is endorsed by the local Democratic Central Committee, and Dominguez serves as a member of that body. It is perhaps for this reason Banales has issued a stinging denunciation of party politics in local elections.

The race for the third district between Murillo and Byrne promises to be a foreshadowing of city council races to come. My guess is that each of these candidates will spend in the vicinity of $50,000 on their candidacies – and all of these dollars will be concentrated on the 3rd District, which is geographically the smallest. There will be more campaign literature, flyers, yard signs, and other political razz-a-matazz focused on the third district than has ever been the case before.

Personally, I think that’s a good thing. One thing is for certain – everyone in the 3rd District will know Murillo and Byrne by the end of the campaign in a way that has not been the case before. It will be fascinating to watch, and the outcome is definitely uncertain. Murillo has an attractive personality and is committed to her office, but is perceived politically as on the far left. Byrne has a tenacity and level of involvement in local politics that is second to none, which is why – even running against an incumbent – she has a strong chance.

Looking to the future, the mayoral race in two years will also be affected by district elections. This is because only the 4th, 5th, and 6th districts will be electing a councilmember simultaneously with the mayor – and thus there will be a higher turn-out in these districts than in the rest of the city.

Although he has given no indication to this effect, my guess is that Gregg Hart is considering a run for mayor in two years. Others currently on the city council – including Bendy White, Dale Francisco, Frank Hotchkiss, and, presuming he is re-elected, Rowse – are also potential contenders.

District elections will change the future of Santa Barbara politics – this is one thing that is certain in the transition from at-large elections. I believe district elections will be good for the city and lead to greater neighborhood representation on the city council.

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Bi-Weekly Capitalist

by Jeff Harding

Jeff Harding is a real estate investor and a writer on economics and finance. He is the former publisher of the Daily Capitalist, a popular economics blog. He is also an adjunct professor at SBCC.

L.A.’s Campaign Against Workers

L

os Angeles passed an ordinance that required businesses in the City of Los Angeles to pay workers a minimum of $15 per hour by 2020.

I’m reading now that L.A.’s mayor Gil Garcetti is against other cities raising the minimum wage to $15 as L.A. did.

“Different economies need different levels. The cost of living is different, and you need to cater to what works for your city.”

Challenged by economists who say that will cause unemployment among low-wage workers, Garcetti mentioned that according to a survey of businesses, none of the respondents said they would leave L.A. because of the wage raise and only a “small minority” would reduce staff.

He also said, “When a billion dollars is put in the pocket of low-income Angelenos, they don’t put that into savings; you’ll see that money hit Main Street in a big way and you’ll see that help businesses.”

The quest for the $15 minimum wage was driven by the L.A. Federation of Labor, a union coalition, which organized its members and got 100,000 signatures on a petition to raise it.

So, I have a question or two for the supporters of this raise: why don’t they increase the minimum wage to $15 now, instead of waiting until 2020?

Why are they only raising it to $15?

Why not $20 or $25 or $40?

If the theory is that by the stroke of a pen you can reduce poverty, why don’t they?

They say, well, that’s too much right away. It will take time for all employers to adjust to the new wage rate.

Let’s break this down and figure out what they are saying.

They admit that businesses can’t just raise wages willy-nilly because if operating costs are too high, they will go out of business or reduce hours and workers. They understand that business is a competitive venture and at some point, if costs are too high, they will fail.

But what they are really saying is that they know what that point is for all businesses in L.A. They believe that they are all-wise and competent enough to establish wages that will be “just right” for every business in L.A..

Think about this for a minute.

Embedded in their premise is the belief that all businesses are pretty much the same and that by setting wages at a politically desirable rate, the impact will be the same for all businesses. So no matter what your business is, or what your non-labor costs are, or what consumers are willing to pay for your product or service, or how efficient your competitors are, a uniform minimum wage throughout the entire city will achieve the same result.

Does anyone believe that all businesses are the same?

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Yet they believe, despite the majority of economic studies have proven otherwise, minimum wages won’t result in unemployment or reduced output.

Wow, that’s pretty… arrogant.

And why just $15? If they believe that raising the minimum wage won’t cause unemployment, then why not raise it to $20? Since they believe that all businesses are pretty much the same, that businesses can just raise prices all around and everything will be relatively equal, why don’t they do this? If all businesses have to pay workers $20 an hour, can’t they all just raise prices accordingly and then maintain their same profit margins?

If they believe that raising the minimum wage won’t cause unemployment, then why not raise it to $20?

Isn’t this flaw in their theory so obvious that anyone can point it out? If everyone raises prices, then the workers will be no better off with $15 or $20 an hour because all costs will rise commensurately. And, as pointed out above, since businesses are not all the same, some will be able to raise prices or reduce costs, some not (Joe’s hamburger stand versus corporate MacDonald’s).

And here’s another flaw in Mayor Garcetti’s cure for poverty: those billions that he says will go into the pockets of workers and thus will spur on the economy? That’s another fallacy. If you take the money out of the pockets of

one group (entrepreneurs) and put it in the pockets of another group (workers), where is the net gain to the local economy?

Are they saying that business owners don’t spend money? Are they saying that workers spend it more wisely and more beneficially? That just ain’t true.

There are a couple other things that should bother you about this.

Garcetti pleaded with surrounding communities to match L.A.’s minimum wage in order to “prevent pockets of poverty.” That, my friends, is a crock.

What he is afraid of is that low-wage businesses will leave L.A. and move to cities that don’t establish wage controls.

And he is correct. This law will drive businesses out of L.A..

L.A. metro is the nation’s leading manufacturing center. According to the Department of labor, L.A. has more workers in manufacturing that any other city. Surprised? A substantial portion of those workers are in the apparel industry, a notoriously low-wage, low-margin business. If L.A. drives them out, where do you think those jobs will go? Bell Gardens? Try China or Indonesia. They will be gone for good.

The other thing to think about is that unions are exempt from this law. Yep, if they bargain for lower wages, they can. If the SEIU (Service Employees International Union) bargains for $9 an hour for janitors, they can. Wait, weren’t they the ones pushing for $15? Does this smell of hypocrisy? Do they know something we don’t? I think they do, and I think this whole thing is about politics and not poverty.

Just watch. L.A.’s minimum wage law will reduce employment, drive businesses out of L.A. and out of America, and increase unemployment. Mayor Helene Schneider, are you listening?

Publisher/Editor • Tim Buckley | Design/Production • Trent Watanabe Managing Editor • James Luksic Columnists Shop Girl • Kateri Wozny | Man About Town • Mark Leisure Plan B • Briana Westmacott | Food File • Christina Enoch Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy | The Weekly Capitalist • Jeff Harding The Beer Guy • Zach Rosen | Cinema Scope • James Luksic Girl About Town • Julie Bifano | In The Zone • Tommie Vaughn Stylin’ & Profilin’ • Megan Waldrep | Fortnight • Jeff Wing State Street Scribe • Jeff Wing | Holistic Deliberation • Allison Antoinette Up Close • Jacquelyn De Longe | Behind The Vine • Hana-Lee Sedgwick The Local • Megan Waldrep | Lanny’s Take • Lanny Ebenstein Advertising/Sales Tanis Nelson • 805.689.0304 • tanis@santabarbarasentinel.com Sue Brooks • 805.455.9116 • sue@santabarbarasentinel.com Judson Bardwell • 619.379.1506 • judson@santabarbarasentinel.com Kim Collins • 805.895.1305 • kim@santabarbarasentinel.com Published by SB Sentinel, LLC PRINTED BY NPCP INC., SANTA BARBARA, CA Santa Barbara Sentinel is compiled every other Friday 133 EAST DE LA GUERRA STREET, #182, Santa Barbara 93101 How to reach us: 805.845.1673 • E-MAIL: tim@santabarbarasentinel.com

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STATE STREET SCRIBE

by Jeff Wing

Jeff is a journalist, raconteur, autodidact, and polysyllable enthusiast. A long-time resident of SB, he takes great delight in chronicling the lesser known facets of this gaudy jewel by the sea. Jeff can be reached at jeffwingg@gmail.com

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Add Dan Encell to your team of trusted advisors!

Welcome to Santa Barbara

H

ello, stunned arriviste. Yeah, you. Welcome! You made it!

Congratulations on your escape from Indianapolis.

G’head, g’head! Look around! It’s amazing, isn’t it? Can you believe this place? Santa Barbara! We’ve got lush forested mountains, the glittering azure of the Pacific Ocean, incredible weather, little dogs in sweaters – in short, everything you need. It’s all right here.

And so are you! How does that feel? Ha ha! Rhetorical question! I know how it feels. Fantastic, right?

You despaired of ever escaping Indianapolis or Laramie or Sioux Falls or Broomfield or Butte or Schneblyville

new arrivals, we’ve prepared your Newbie orientation. Do you know much about Santa Barbara? No? Perfect. I’m… I’m the town’s most popular columnist. Anyway, here are some of the unique terms and places that in sum comprise our utterly inimitable paradise. Listen carefully, there will be a quiz. Okay, Newbie – pay attention. Here is today’s lesson: Stearns Wharf – Our famous local pier was once owned by tough guy Jimmy Cagney, but today it is typified by a threadbare, spasmodic robot chicken in front of a candy store.

Stearns is also home to Moby Dick, a local dining institution to whose title the European guidebooks often

Remember, the few who have made it to Santa Barbara were fated by the stars to live here or whatever…. and yet here you are. You must have done something right! Yes, we’ve all read about those places, those… (columnist stares momentarily into the empty air with a haunted expression)… those cities-that-are-not-Santa Barbara.

We know about the smoldering strip mines, tap water that bursts into flame, dogs walking around without sweaters.

You’ll be safe here, friend. Schneblyville can’t hurt you anymore. Think of Santa Barbara as a kind of Monaco; a principality, a world unto itself, a dream of glamour and escape, of candlelight on crystal, and a concentration of cash to make the head spin. Every kind of liquidity but that conferred by water.

Monaco had Grace Kelly. We have Chris Mitchum, and in a certain light he is just as striking, if not as likely to have hung off Gary Cooper’s arm in High Noon.

Now, as is common practice with all

add an unfortunate (and misleading) possessive apostrophe.

Among Stearns’s additional attractions are the Santa Barbara Shellfish Company’s seething live crab selection (known to squeamish locals as the Ridley Scott Touch Tanks), and the swaggering do-nothing pelicans that roam the pier like pouchy wall-eyed vagabonds, charming you for the 14 seconds it takes them to realize you’re holding a cheeseburger. Pay attention as you run to the first-aid station and there are spectacular views to be had of the shore and Santa Ynez Mountains.

Santa Barbara Mission – This stately historic landmark is the crown jewel of Santa Barbara and, along with the downtown Presidio, our very raison d’être from a time when Christos and ...continued p.11

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by Zach Rosen

Barbecue and beer is a natural fit

Cook Your Beer This Summer Beer can make a rich sauce for pasta and other dishes

T

here is just something about the summertime that lends itself to cooking and eating. Between barbecues, picnics and vacations, there are plenty of opportunities for culinary adventure. Beer is not only the perfect summertime beverage, it also makes a great ingredient to cook with. This summer, pop open your favorite brew and see what suds can do in the kitchen.

Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

Beer Cooking Basics

There are a few basic rules to be aware of before cooking with beer. By far, the most important factor when using beer as an ingredient is its bitterness.

Heating beer pushes off aromatics and concentrates bitter and astringent compounds exponentially. Beers that start off relatively mild in bitterness can transform into mouth-wrenching experiences if they are cooked for too long. This becomes especially important when making a sauce, reduction, or deglazing a pan. I will sometimes pour a little beer in the cooking vessel immediately after turning off the flame. This can help replace some of the aromatics but will not change the consistency of the dish much.

A few tips for producing flavorful sauces that don’t end up a bitter mess: roasted malts naturally have more astringent and bitter compounds, so it is best to avoid dark beers such as stouts or porters as an ingredient in sauces and reductions. If you do want to try to use a dark beer, go with a dunkel (Czechvar Dark), doppelbock (Spaten Optimator), or a schwarzbier (Kostritzer). These dark lagers have a low bitterness and the specialty malts the brewers use to produce the dark color are lower in astringency than those found in stouts and porters. Belgian ales and sweeter beer styles like Scottish ales are usually safe choices for using in a sauce. I’ve also found that yeastier

Baking and Barbecuing with Beer

Beer makes an amazing brine or marinade, even when cooking a whole pig!

beers like hefeweizens produce a kind of funky flavor to the sauce that can be undesirable.

When cooking beer sauces, beurre manié is my secret tool. It is equal parts flour and butter that have been kneaded together. This concoction is whisked into a liquid over low heat to produce a silky sauce with no clumps.

Beurre manié is so quick and effective at thickening sauces that it allows you to minimize the amount of liquid being reduced and helps you avoid concentrating the bitterness in the beer.

How much to add will be determined by the base sauce and the desired thickness. Adding it in individual teaspoon-sized balls over low heat while continually stirring will give you full control over the end product. Using a beurre manié will allow you to cook with a wider range of beers without having to be as concerned about the bitterness levels in the brew.

For example, a personal favorite is

a deconstructed goulash ravioli made from rye beer. Most rye beers are a little too bitter to be used in sauces, but a beurre manié makes cooking with these beers a possibility. First, make a goulash replacing about half of the cooking liquid with a rye beer. Hop Rod Rye from Bear Republic is a wonderful rye beer and is easy to find, though it does have a good deal of bitterness – so be careful of how much you add to the pot. After the goulash has been cooked, remove the beef and vegetables and drain them well. Chop the ingredients together to make a filling. When making the pasta dough, you can incorporate smoked paprika and cracked pepper into the dough to add some extra depth to the dish. Take some of the cooking liquid and thicken it with beurre manié to produce the sauce. After assembly, this is an incredibly satisfying meal that bursts with flavor.

If the beer is being used in a sauce or salad dressing that won’t be getting cooked, then everything is fair game.

The acidity and complex flavors of sour beers can make a unique salad dressing with a lot of depth. Sour beers can be expensive, however, and you may not want to be cooking with a $20 bottle of beer. Highway 128 Blood Orange Gose from Anderson Valley Brewing Co is an affordable sour, and the salt and blood orange peel it is brewed with makes it perfect for salad dressings.

Whisk it together with some Meyer lemon olive oil, cracked pepper and a dash of Dijon mustard, and you have a wonderful salad dressing for summer salads. I suggest using it to dress a salad of butter lettuce, caramelized pecans, and tangerines.

Beer is a natural ingredient for baking. If you look online, you can find plenty of recipes for breads, cakes, and other baked goods that call for beer. I suggest replacing 3/4 of the water in a pizza dough recipe with beer. The carbonation in beer helps the dough rise quicker and produces a lighter and fluffier crust. The beer also adds sugars and extra protein to the dough, which will help it brown in the oven. But why stop adding beer there? After the dough has been rolled out, slather it with a beer barbecue sauce. For toppings, you can add smoked Gouda, chopped beercan chicken, roasted corn, and onions that have been marinated in sour beer and then caramelized using a smoked doppelbock, such as the one from Aecht Schlenkerla.

Cooking beer also caramelizes its sugars. The richer sweetness developed during cooking makes beer perfect for using as a barbecue marinade or a braising liquid. Rauchbiers and other smoked beers are a natural fit for braising brisket or marinating ribs.

With these cooking techniques, you do not have to be nearly as concerned with the bitterness. A juicy, fruitforward IPA such as Fresh Squeezed IPA from Deschutes Brewery can give a chicken marinade an extra kick. The curacao and coriander found in witbiers like Telegraph White Ale make a nice accent in a seafood marinade, and the wheat flavors work well with the softer textures of fish. There really is no right answer, though. Play with different combinations of beer marinades and meats, and you will discover an endless supply of tasty pairings.

So the next time you find yourself opening a beer as you start heating up the grill, don’t be afraid to spill some of your brew in the food. There are more ways to incorporate beer into your meal than just shoving a can up a chicken’s backside, though that technique does have surprisingly tasty results. I encourage you to go beyond beer-can chicken or a beer chili, really explore beer as an ingredient and discover the wonders it can do for your food.

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JUNE 18 - AUG 1

by Jeff Wing

Tell us all about your art opening, performance, dance party, book signing, sale of something we can’t live without, or event of any other kind by emailing fortnight@santabarbarasentinel.com. If our readers can go to it, look at it, eat it, or buy it, we want to know about it and will consider it for inclusion here.

Special consideration will be given to interesting, exploratory, unfamiliar, and unusual items. We give calendar preference to those who take the time to submit a picture along with their listing.

Fly Me to Charon and Let Me Play Among the Stars, Let Me Dance to Boingo While Our Darla Rules the Bars

O

n February 17, 1930, boring-haired astronomer Clyde Tombaugh would likely not have foreseen that in far-flung 2015 a bit of his burned corpse would be zipping past Pluto in a spaceship the size of a grand piano. Life’s funny that way. But on February 18 that year, he confirmed the existence of the virtually invisible distant rock and the die was cast. As of this writing, the New Horizons planetary probe (basically a huge, needy-looking dish antenna strapped to the sort of shapeless crap that might fall off the bottom of your car, but bigger) is flying past distant Pluto and taking pictures like a sonofabitch. A thimbleful of Clyde’s ashes are aboard, as is the Venetia Burney Student Dust Counter, an elaborately titled instrument for counting deep-space dust particles, named after the precocious 11-year-old British schoolgirl who named the newly discovered dwarf planet its nom de Pierre back in 1930. Venetia just recently left our solar system, too, passing away in 2009 at the age of 90, and so lived plenty long enough to be the nondescript grandmotherly figure in the produce section, squeezing cantaloupes and having named Pluto. Reality is so deliciously batshit, we don’t need to dress it up. But let’s do, anyway. Herewith, a small selection of Earth customs aimed at affecting, one way or another, that restless, throbbing fever-jelly trapped behind your ribs and planning its escape. Fortnight! This one’s for Clyde and Venetia.

Dead Man’s Party

I

n the Oberheim 80s when most bands were laying whole forearms across the keyboard and wearing mascara like Edie Sedgwick on a bender, Oingo Boingo’s orange-haired hoodornament/maestro Danny Elfman was penning minor key dance anthems to Life’s oblique underbelly and performing same with a staccato brass band that looked like your weird uncle’s Elks Club buddies. Velvet Jones (arguably the most classically club-like club in town) hosts Oingo venerators Dead Man’s Party, and an evening of high-falutin New Wave throwback. The inimitable Darla Bea will beam in from the 8th dimension to fill the evening’s interstitial spaces with an augmenting 80s vibe that’ll have you Dancing with Tears in Your Eyes. Check this. Friday, July 31, 8 pm – Midnight Velvet Jones, 423 State Street.

Count Basie Orchestra

T

his year marks the 80th anniversary of the legendary Count Basie Orchestra, and for those of us who’ve been dancing to the band since their launch in the early 1920s, it feels like it! Like Ellington’s band, Basie’s outfit spawned more jazz greats than any one act should have a right to, among them Lester Young, Clark Terry, Joe Williams (whose treatment of “When Sonny Gets Blue” should be officially voted the country’s “Cocktail Hour National Anthem”), Billie Holiday… and on and on. Basie died in ’84 but his band lives on, fueled by sheer, lovely musical momentum and even featuring four of the original players, if you can imagine. If you occasionally wonder if all that amazing Golden Age music was just a dream, here’s the evidence that it all really happened, and happens yet. An aptly named

program called “The Most Explosive Force in Jazz” will test the Granada’s seismic retrofit on Sunday, July 19, at 4 pm. Don’t relive the musical past, live the musical present. The demure Carmen Bradford will be lending her window-rattling pipes to the outing.

Wear your spats.

Over the River and Through the Woods

“O

ver the river and through the trees to Grandmother’s house we go…”. This lilting and beloved tune describes a grandmother who bakes pumpkin pie and greets the visitor at a barnyard gate. Hoo, boy. Where shall I start? Carpinteria’s Plaza Playhouse helps redress the kindly grandparent fantasia, as scheming old folks attempt to orchestrate a romance for their own grasping ends. Written by Joe DePietro and directed by Jordana Lawrence, the show is a terrific heartwarmer with more than a little spice. Come spend time in the Plaza Playhouse Theater, founded in 1928 as the Alcazar and still going strong. Can you imagine the people and entertainers and artists who have passed through that place? An old community theater is a conduit. Come partake of the energy. July 19, 24, 25, and 26 – Fridays and Saturdays at 8 pm, Sundays at 3 pm.

“Living Wall Garden” Class

F

rancis Dawson has a skill set you have to see to believe. On July 26 at the Santa Barbara Public Market, Ms. Dawson will demonstrate how to create art that is “alive and evolving” (is that a good idea?) using plants and organic whatnot to create unusual “garden art” that can be displayed in your home. On your wall, to be exact. All materials are

Friday

July 31 at 8 pm – Midnight ■ Extragalactic introvert DJ Darla Bea alights from her mothership – catch her at Velvet Jones for 80s Night, 423 State Street. provided at this event, and as a guest you will take home a “living garden” following the class. If the living garden chases you to your car, you have overfertilized. Tickets are $45 and include takeaway garden. As I just told you!

Headless Household Leave a Window

T

his next is less an event than a happening. Musically peripatetic hunchbacks Headless Household have released their ninth studio album Balladismo, and it’s an upsy-daisy. If you’re not familiar with their work, you may be a fan. I could use a lot of uber-hyphenates to try to conjure the cornucopiousness of their written output, but that is a fool’s game (hold your comment). We’ll call them avantgarde and take the beige way out.

Sunday

July 19 at 4 pm ■ “The Most Explosive Force in Jazz” will test the Granada’s seismic retrofit This recent outing is a layer cake from heaven. From the loping, immediately mesmerizing “I Love You Too” (whose downbeat you’ll languidly pursue to your own doom) to the mysteriously stirring “06 In Wait (Prelude)”, the record is a lavender sachet with hints of Worcestershire. The tune “Lucidity” (“..a beautiful machinery, humanity.

Such clarity!”) is alone worth the price of admission. Like Hackett’s “Hoping Love Will Last”, Lucidity’s seemingly irresolute chord structure yields such counterintuitive nourishment as is rarely (never) proffered these days by the abacab magnates. These lucky stiffs do what they want, and what they want is to think out loud, and they think nice.

Real nice. Support this effort and others like it.

Parkinson’s: Along the Road to Hope

D

r. Daniel Joseph is 82. Shortly after he retired from the medical field in 1999, he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s, a diagnosis he dismissed (I know I would, too) until the tremors made deniability an issue. When a friend suggested he join her at the canvas, the Good Doctor, to his own surprise and delight, emerged from his chrysalis and got to work. You can see the results when he displays his art at the Leigh Block Gallery, located within Hospice of Santa Barbara, on August 2 for a special one-day exhibition.

There will be wine and hors d’oeuvres, and plenty of time to gaze steadily at the exalted work of a newly minted artist.

Life doesn’t just “go on.” It sprints away like a slobbering, happy mutt and drags your ass along behind it. Come on up the hill and check out Dr. Joseph’s work.

Hospice of SB is behind the Riviera Theatre, more or less.

Free Self-Employment Training

T

his one-hour free seminar requires your RSVP to learn the location. Call (805) 456-2342. Program coordinator

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...continued from p.7

Thurs-Fri-Sat

July 23-25, 7 pm ■ The Talented Kids of Once on This Island plays at La Colina Jr. High School - 4025 Foothill Road

Sunday

July 26, 10 am – 12 pm ■ Creating “Living Walls” class at the Santa Barbara Public Market Claire Anderson will take questions and explain what WEV does, and gauge your seriousness about becoming a selffueled business owner. That’s the cornerturning WEV is all about. WEV stands for “Women’s Economic Ventures” and since 1991 the nonprofit has offered, to women and men, thorough training in the art of starting, operating, and/or expanding a business. WEV’s longtime hallmark is a 14-week course they call “Self Employment Training” (SET), whose rigors see the happily overstuffed grads emerge with complete business knowhow – from marketing to legal to finances to sales – and a business plan.

That’s called a launch pad. This could be a personally momentous one hour.

Call the number. This is not a bait and switch. WEV do great work. Thursday, July 28 – Noon to 1 pm

Once on This Island

S

waying palms, fine white tropical sand, an ensemble of young artists bringing it to the footlights and giving it all their all; no, this isn’t Gilligan’s Island. This is La Colina Jr. High and Showstoppers Youth Ensemble’s joint production of the sultry-in-a-middleschool-sorta-way Calypso head-turner Once on This Island (not to be confused with the 1955 alien invasion heart-stopper, This Island Earth). In the story, a peasant girl named Ti Moune succeeds in her mission to show that betrayal and hate are no match for the simplicity and purity of love, which, when properly wielded, can knock you silly; an old story that sounds thrillingly new every time you hear it. General Admission $15, students and seniors $12 (ages 12-18 with ID), kiddies $7 (ages 11 & under.) This should be a lovely and atmospheric show in which to immerse oneself on a balmy summer SB evening. Come out and dig this one. And generally speaking, please support these summer theater workshops and their designs to keep the kids occupied, lest our stage-

struck youth take to the mean streets, finger-snapping in balletic formation, hollering unnecessarily complex Sondheim ballads from upstairs windows, doing Jerome Robbins’s kicks on our playgrounds and public spaces, tap dancing down the middle of State Street – go home, you punks!

Thursday-Friday-Saturday, July 23-25, 7 pm.

Gallerie Silo Opening Reception

T

he Funk Zone by any other name would still be rife with artist types. The battered-Quonset chic of the architecture, the snifter-hoisting arties ogling the canvases while casting surreptitious glances at one another; it’s all of a piece. Here comes another gallery opening, this one a kind of homecoming.

Michael Armour and his partner, the unlikely Chantal Wunderlich (whose name could have come straight out of a Pynchon novel) will be opening the gallery and a new chapter in Mr. Armour’s life, as he returns to SB after years spent gallivanting about the country, hanging his affecting, headopening art from New York City to Seattle, writing a novel, and generally connecting the golden moments. The gallery and artist’s studio occupy the turret at the corner of Mason and Gray. You can’t miss it. Welcome home, Michael. Friday, July 24 – 118-B Gray Avenue, Santa Barbara.

That’s it for this Fortnight. If you have suggestions for this column to do with formatting, content, or my runon diarrheac typing, send me a note. I want what you want, unless you want a mouthful of piping hot sauerkraut and a swarm of angry South African sawtoothed wasps angrily dive-bombing your naked ass as you run screaming through Men’s Sportswear in Nordie.

And remember, dear reader: when reality allows a middle-aged astronomer and an 11-year-old classics enthusiast to split a cab bound for Pluto, the episode surely confirms the outlook voiced by New Zealand songwriter extraordinaire Neil Finn, who opined “…round the world, round the world, is a tangled-up necklace of pearls”. To which I’ll add dear Burt Bacharach’s simple directive: Reach out. Tot straks.

cannonade went together like Laverne and Shirley. Known to the indigenous population as “Hotel California” (many Native Americans in the area “checked out” but were not seen to actually leave the Mission property), California’s “Queen of the Missions” boasts a gorgeous rose garden, stunning elevated ocean views, and a generous subterranean pension plan that provides a free resting place to the 4,000 or so natives who helped build and grow the early Mission in its 18th-century heyday. The cultural frisson alone is worth the visit. And the views!

Shoreline Park – A thrill ride cunningly disguised as a glorious public space, the ironically named Shoreline Park perches precariously atop an oceanfront cliff made porous by generations of overfed, burrowing squirrels. The “shoreline” at Shoreline Park will thus be occasionally redefined with a terrifying roar, as a huge vertical slab of weakened cliff noisily separates from the mainland, pitching happy-go-lucky Frisbee show-offs, starry-eyed lovers, slow-hug hippies and sleeveless fist-bumping, beer-gut barbecue braggarts onto the shoals some 100 feet below. One minute you are enjoying a picnic lunch on your Wal-Mart Dream Catcher blanket, the next you are in free-fall, screaming through a muffled mouthful of ham and Wonder Bread. Enjoy! And again: views.

Alice Keck Park Memorial Garden – On land graciously deeded by a woman with the fated name Alice Keck Park, this disorienting Dr. Seuss promenade in the heart of SB is a menagerie of flora that would seem right at home on one of the moons of Jupiter. The “sensory garden” is especially enlivening.

Compassionately designed and constructed for the visually challenged among us (the blind, that is), recorded

voices indistinctly describe what plants surround you at any given stop along the tour, the indecipherable narration sounding like a sleepwalker murmuring through galvanized tin. The inadvertent effect is to cruelly convince the visually impaired visitor that he is losing his hearing. Views here are sensory. Or were intended to be.

Brophy Brothers at the Harbor – Watch the sun set over an incredibly gorgeous harbor side idyll as you stroll the breakwater and wait for your table.

Nations will rise and fall, the seas will be stripped of life, and mankind will surmount the impenetrable mysteries of space and love, conquer the cosmos, and touch the face of God at the hallowed end of Time itself. Then your little ringer will go off. Your table is ready! Glass half-full; the interminable wait will see that cheap bottle of wine you brought age nicely into a smoky, complex beauty with notes of frazzleberry and Cinnabon. Truly extraordinary views but your cataracts will make all that moot.

Well, new neighbor, that’s about it for now. I hope you feel a little bit more familiar with your adoptive new home, and more than a little blessed to be here in amazing Santa Barbara! Remember, the few who have made it to Santa Barbara were fated by the stars to live here. We are the new Adams, the new Eves. But here’s the beauty part: We don’t have to leave the Garden! We don’t have to go out there and face the world with its strip malls and crowded public pools and laughing traffic cops with their bellies out to here, kids skipping rope on hot asphalt or running noisily through sprinklers, and snow shovels and vaccines, and drivers leaning on their horns and unkempt flower boxes.

We can do as we please. We can stay right here! Believe me, by tomorrow Indianapolis will be a distant dream.

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SYVSNAPSHOT

by Eva Van Prooyen Keeping a finger on the pulse of the Santa Ynez Valley: what to eat, where to go, who to meet, and what to drink. Pretty much everything and anything situated between the Santa Ynez and San Rafael Mountains that could tickle one’s interest.

Summer Fun Roundup: Magic, Movies, and Parties Movies in the Park

Grab the kiddos, blankets, and lawn chairs for a fresh-air cinema viewing of The Princess and the Frog under a starry summer evening sky. Fresh popcorn and hot chocolate for sale. Films are rated G-PG13. Parents are responsible for deciding whether the film is appropriate for their children.

When: Friday, July 24, at 7:30 pm, movie starts when it gets dark enough Where: Solvang Park Cost: Free Info: www.solvangusa.com

Vintners Run 5 Miler

The first Santa Barbara Vintners 5 Miler presented by the Santa Barbara Vintners Foundation is a trail run through the vineyards of Sanford Winery in the Santa Rita Hills. Each mile represents one of the five viticultural areas in our wine country: Ballard Canyon, Happy Canyon of Santa Barbara, Santa Maria Valley, Santa Rita Hills, and Santa Ynez Valley. Walkers are welcome, and a family-friendly Finish Line Festival welcomes everyone of all ages to celebrate the coming harvest from Santa Barbara’s five AVA wine regions. Enjoy regional food, music from Dave Courtenay and the Castawaves, a kids fun zone, and of course, plenty of wine tasting. Proceeds of the event support the Vintners Foundation.

When: Saturday, July 25, noon to midnight Where: Various locations throughout the valley Info: www.sbcountywines.com

Cachuma Lake – Wildlife Cruise

Santa Barbara County Park Naturalists lead two-hour cruises focusing on resident wildlife and flora and fauna, including: deer, nesting hawks, herons, and songbirds, flora, cultural history, and geology.

When: Saturday, July 25, 10-noon & 3-5 pm Where: Cachuma Lake, Hwy 154, Solvang Cost: $15/adults, $7/kids (4-12 years old) Info: (805) 688-4515

Star Party!

Back by popular demand, the guys from the Santa Barbara Astronomical Unit will bring the big telescopes to Buttonwood Farm and Winery for an evening of stargazing. The night begins with a light supper and wine on the patio as dusk approaches, then Earthlings will trek out to the orchard meadow to see what the beautiful night sky reveals.

When: Friday, July 31, 5:30 pm Where: Buttonwood Farm Winery & Vineyard, 1500 Alamo Pintado Road Cost: call for details Info: (805) 688-3032

Abracadabra!

Magician Shawn McMaster presents an interactive, spellbinding, high-energy, magic show laced with humor and filled with astonishment and giggles for the whole family. Best for ages 4 and up.

When: Saturday, August 1, from 10:30 am to noon Where: Solvang Branch Library, 1745 Mission Drive, Solvang Cost: free ...continued p.14 Info: (805) 688-8214

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Palmina 20th Year Anniversary Pizza Party

Join Palmina for an evening of wine, food, music and bocce to celebrate Palmina’s 20th anniversary at Sogno del Fiore, one of the premier vineyard and event properties in the Santa Ynez Valley. Live music starring co-owner and winemaker Steve Clifton and his band, Mojo Classic Rock and a food lineup including Erik Kelley from The Cheese Store of Beverly Hills, chef Brandon Boudet from Dominick’s (Los Angeles), Jake Francis from Valley Piggery, and David Cecchini from Cecco Ristorante in Solvang. There will also be a full lineup of Palmina current releases, a special selection of library wines, raffle items, and more.

When: Saturday, August 1, from 5 to 8 pm Where: Sogno del Fiore 2045 N Refugio Road in Santa Ynez Cost: $70/per person Info: (805) 735-2030

Great Gatsby Gala

Put on your best 1920s-inspired threads and take a step back in time for the First Annual Great Gatsby Gala at Sanford Winery! All guests can indulge in Sanford’s estate wines and cuisine inspired by the era. Dance the night away to a live jazz band, play a round of croquet and take advantage of special wine discounts for all guests. There will be a prize for the best dressed.

When: Saturday, August 1, from 5 to 8:30 pm Where: Sanford Winery Cost: $150/ $120 Wine Club Info: For more information or to purchase tickets, call (805) 735-5900, ext. 9, or email sonja@sanfordwinery.com.

Fiesta in the Vines

It’s Fiesta north... Santa Ynez Valley style with an annual summer Fiesta Party and celebration of Valley wines! Benefitting the Santa Ynez Valley Historical Museum, this event features more than 30 Valley wineries pouring their liquid treasures. The wine tasting will be accompanied by and abundance of food stations featuring hors d’oeuvres and entertainment by Fiesta dancers

and music. No formal dinner, no live auction… just pure party fun and enjoyment.

Celebrating the SY Valley and its Santa Barbara Fiesta Heritage When: Saturday, July 25, 7 pm Where: 3596 Sagunto Street, Santa Ynez Cost: $50 Info: (805) 688-7889

Open That Bottle… on Thursday!

Every Thursday, S.Y. Kitchen invites you to bring in your favorite bottle of Santa Barbara County wine and sit down to a family-style dinner of fresh salad, grilled meats, and classic dessert for $35 per person… and they waive the corkage fee.

When: Thursday, August 6 Where: S.Y. Kitchen is located at 1110 Faraday Street in Santa Ynez Info: www.sykitchen.com or call (805) 691-9794

“Get Your Boots Dirty” at Lucas & Lewellen Vineyards

The 11th annual Wine Club Tour of Lucas & Lewellen Vineyards is an excellent example of all good things that can come with a wine club membership. Guests meet at L&L in Solvang for light hors d’oeuvres and wine tasting before shuttling through the Valley View, Goodchild, and Los Alamos vineyards while informative hosts entertain, educate, and pour wines from each featured vineyard. Stop for a tour of L&L Buellton winery and complete your day with a standing lasagna dinner at the Tasting Room.

When: Saturday, August 8, from 1 to 6 pm Where: Lucas & Lewellen Vineyards Tasting Room in Solvang, 1645 Copenhagen Drive in Solvang Cost: Wine Club members $65/ per person, non-members $85 Info: RSVP at (805) 686-9336 or email anjie@llwine.com

Remember to celebrate summer with some of these quintessential National Days in August: Sunday, August 2 – National Ice Cream Sandwich Day Monday, August 3 – National Watermelon Day Thursday, August 6 – National Rootbeer Float Day Monday, August 10 – National S’mores Day

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with Mark Léisuré

Mark spends much of his time wandering Santa Barbara and environs, enjoying the simple things that come his way.

A show here, a benefit there, he is generally out and about and typically has a good time. He says that he writes “when he feels the urge” and doesn’t want his identity known for fear of an experience that is “less than authentic.” So he remains at large, roaming the town, having fun. Be warned.

The Great Outdoors is F-ing Great!

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unno why, but it just occurred to me that a lot of the events I want to cover in this fortnight’s column either begin with or at least have a loose connection to a certain sixth letter of the alphabet. Yes, I know, that works for “Fortnight”, too, a word we weren’t able to use very often until the Sentinel reverted to an every-otherweek publication schedule last year.

Anyway, to paraphrase Sesame Street, today’s column is brought to you by the letter F. We’ll begin with Fiesta Ranchera, the annual fundraiser for Old Spanish Days out at the Stow House in Goleta.

The grounds of this historic site are so beautiful and laid-out just perfectly for events, I’m really not sure why there aren’t more such shindigs there. But the Fiesta folks know how to do it up right. The food providers are formed in a horseshoe right outside the entrance to the house, and you can wander round and round noshing to your heart’s (and stomach’s) content. Pork seemed to be the main meal this year, done up any number of ways, all of them delicious.

Then you head over to the big grassy area for performances, first by the Spirits of Fiesta, and then the perennially popular funk band Area 51, which rollicked the dances masses on into the evening in a warm up for their doubleduty gigs at the Summer Solstice celebration later that weekend. By the way, the Spirits this year are a feisty duo: Junior Spirit Ysabella Yturralde (y not?) did a sassy little number, while Senior Spirit Alexandra Freres was shaking her thing rock ‘n’ roll style on the dance floor with a bunch of friends even before her more traditional performances – never seen that before at Fiesta. Fabulous!

Wine Festival

Moving on, later in June, I had a blast at the Santa Barbara Wine Festival, which I’d missed for the last few years, and now I’m wondering why. Even if you weren’t imbibing a whole lot (which was the case with me recently), just getting a chance to sip some of the fine vintages and engage the winemakers in meaningful conversation was valuable enough, and that’s not even considering the remarkable array of food choices, including offerings from Barbareno,

Ca’Dario, the Finch & Fork, Sama Sama Kitchen, the Stonehouse Restaurant, and Michael’s Catering, whose catering skills were challenged by his culinary expertise: the meat and potatoes concoction was so popular, Michael went from serving it on plates, to cups and finally spoonfuls!

TGIF

More recently, actually just a couple of Fridays ago, I found my doing the outdoor equivalent of bar-hopping. The festivities began at the Environmental Defense Center’s TGIF party, the monthly warm-weather gathering of friends and fellow ecologically minded folks to down a couple of free drinks (two craft beers or glasses of local wine), partake of the natural foodstuffs, listen to live music and talk about anything and everything, including recent victories in saving the Naples coast and more. Only problem with these events is they’re getting too darn crowded. Seems like they crammed even more than the allotted 300-something people in the organization’s courtyard. They might have to start looking for bigger digs!

Film, Suds, and Wheels

Just as TGIF was wrapping up, the second annual New Belgium Clips Beer & Film Tour was getting going in earnest over at Chase Palm Park – where just one night earlier, the retro swing band Lost Dog Found jitterbugged us through sunset at Concerts in the Park. The event is one-part microbrew festival and one part film festival, with fan-created short films on bicycling and other outdoor adventures airing in the great open air, on an inflatable screen plenty large enough to see from anywhere in the park. There seemed to be plenty of smiling, happy people, though maybe next year they could coax food trucks and other servers to whip up something other than fried food.

Meanwhile, as darkness crept in, UCSB Arts & Lectures’ Friday film series Over the Rainbow: Great American Movie Musicals was gearing up for its season debut of free summer cinema, with Singin’ in the Rain, maybe the greatest movie musical of them all. There was nary a grassy spot left uncovered at the County Courthouse

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Sunken Gardens, where I arrived just in time for the title song, which drew a surprising round of applause from the crowd.

Lotusfest

Lotusland’s annual Lotus Fest focused on flowers

The following afternoon was all about Flowers, as in the rare Lotus blossom on display in early July at Lotusland’s annual Lotus Fest. They only sell about 100 tickets or so for the event, so not only were there no lines at all at the food or wine booths – just a few of each, but nicely appointed – it was possible to stroll the entire gardens without running into more than a couple of folks on the paths. We made it out to the pool across from the main house between the dracaena circle and fern garden, where my companion couldn’t resist the temptation to dip her feet into the cooling water on a super hot summer afternoon (sadly, she didn’t succumb to the impulse to cool off the rest of her via skinny dipping). That’s where we also heard some tales about Ganna Walska’s family and a birthday-midnight pool party in the very same spot, and could only imagine the sensations.

Feet was the operative word that Saturday night, at the second show of the summer version of the Ojai Concert Series, when the Quebecois band De Temps Antan had all of us moving our hoofers in one way or another – most of them bare and dancing on the lawn in front of the stage, or at least tapping along to the truly irresistible rhythms.

This mischievous trio make a ton of noise for just three people and used their French accents to slyly charm us out of our minds, though the fiddling, strumming, and foot-pounding percussion certainly helped.

Here’s to more frolicking in the temperate two weeks to come, from the French Festival (July 18-19) and Greek Festival (August 1-2) at Oak Park, to funnyman Jim Gaffigan at the Santa Barbara Bowl (Friday, July 24), to the final two installments of Concerts in the Park (Rainbow Girls on Thursday, July 23, and Fortunate Son on Thursday, July 30), to the Music Academy of the West’s concert at the Bowl with the New York Philharmonic (“Ph” sounds like F, doesn’t it?) on the final Monday (August 3) of the 2015 summer music festival.

Fare thee well!

Join Us

for a glimpse into your academic future Attend the Pacifica Experience August 15 in Santa Barbara Don’t Miss the Last One-Day Introduction to Pacifica’s Degree Programs before Classes Begin in September and October

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Observe Typical Classroom Presentations Learn about the Individual Degree Programs Get Details on Admissions and Financial Aid Attend a Student/Alumni Discussion Panel

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As a result, Pacifica graduates are extremely well equipped to enter and excel in rewarding professional careers.

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W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

FLOWER POWER! Come see the Public Market transformed into a floral frenzy & enjoy floral & garden inspired food and drinks from participating merchants!

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There’s more than one way to have a Baby

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a r a b r S t e v e n Santa Ba

is my Spirit Animal

Tyler

Obsessed With: HERE’S THE SCOOP GELATO, SORBET, GOURMET CAFE

ONTHESPOT:

GOLD, SILVER & CRYSTAL – OH MY!

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ewelry artist Jules Kramer defines herself as a designer, serial entrepreneur, philosopher, wife, and mom of two. She sources sterling silver, rose gold fill, 14k gold fill, and oxidized silver chain – and uses hand tools to create each pretty piece. “I love mixing metals and using gemstones to create delicate pieces with a statement.”

We love it, too!

O

wners Ellie and Bob Patterson’s company, Here’s The Scoop, creates gelato and sorbet from seasonal fruits, fresh from local farms. The Lemon Sizzle refreshment (seen here) is decadent, thick, and can be eaten with a spoon – and since only organic ingredients are used, it’s on the healthier side, too. Guilt-free happiness in a cup!

Here’s the Scoop 1187 Coast Village Road #9 805.969.7020

PANINO soups + salads + sandwiches p a n i n o re s t a u r a n t s. c o m

O

nce the pregnancy test shows up positive, and after you’re done jumping up and down or just plain old freaking out, what’s the next step?

Professionals at Cottage Hospital and the Santa Barbara Birthing Center sit down with us to explain how the process works in their respective worlds.

Speaking of pregnancy, who’s hungry?

Our sweet-tooth prayers have been answered by Here’s the Scoop’s special treat in our Obsessed With section and HEAT Culinary Balsamic Fig ice cream topping recipe is revealed in Quick Bites.

For those who aren’t with child, indulge in a Cabernet from Deep Sea Family Wines in Local Libations.

Please keep those emails coming: megan@santabarbarasentinel.com. It’s always great to hear from you! @santabarbarasentinel

The Santa Barbara Company | 214 E. Victoria Street | 805.845.3700 julesbytheseasb.com | Instagram: @julesbytheseasb

Open for Lunch Daily Los Olivos (805) 688 9304

Santa Barbara (805) 963 3700

Goleta (805) 683 3670

Solvang (805) 688 0608

Montecito (805) 565 0137

Santa Ynez (805) 688 0213

MADE SB

by MEGAN WALDREP

Local

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in

Megan has been a columnist since 2013. She’s now the Creative Director of the Local section of the Sentinel and the majority of her time is spent discovering artist, merchants, and meeting talented folks around the Santa Barbara area. Know of someone or something creative, progressive, or just plain amazing? Give her a shout! Megan@santabarbarasentinel.com.

A SANTA BARBARA BABY

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required in California. As for accreditation, there is only one accrediting body nationally; they kind of invented it, and we didn’t feel it was a hoop we needed to jump through since we know we meet all the standards.

Our architect created many of the medical facilities in town, and we were scrupulous in our design.

Are the midwives all certified and licensed? And how many years of experience do they generally have?

We have five midwives – three are certified nurse midwives (CNMs) and two are licensed midwives (LMs), licensed by the medical board. Anna Bunting and Alice Levine have been practicing for over 30 years in Santa Barbara. I have been in the practice as a student and then a midwife for 18 years. We had been offering home births

the entire time and added the birth center four years ago.

Can women choose which midwife they would like to work with?

We work as a group, and we do that so we can all support each other through our call schedule. Every client meets and rotates through all of us. That might not be the one-on-one idea people have about what a midwife is, but we spend an hour with every client with every visit, so you get over 40 hours of face time – between prenatal care, birth, postpartum – it ends up being a wealth of one-on-one. We want everyone to feel comfortable with us. We put a really high premium of building personal relationships.

...continued p.25

MOMMY’S VIP LIST

FOR PRENATAL MASSAGE AND BODY WORK

Experience Your Authenticity The main birthing room, one of three private rooms, at the Santa Barbara Birth Center. Private bathroom and shower are also attached. Full labor, delivery, and recovery take place here. SBBC is a non-profit organization who relies on financial support from the community. Visit sbbirthcenter.org to donate.

I

’m in the throes of mental torment.

Two minutes of waiting for the results has my brain in a spiral of emotional discord. What if the test is positive? Am I ready for this? The timer goes off. My throat tightens and my heart drops to my stomach.

I squint down at the test, as if squinting will help soften the blow. Before I am able to catch sight of the results, I ask myself one last question: If I am pregnant, what do I do next?

Finding out you are pregnant can be overwhelming. Many of us will go through it or have gone through the process of carrying a child. Midwives have been around since the beginning of time but over the last two centuries, hospital births have become the traditional way modern women give birth.

Now, we’re seeing it come full circle.

With at-home and birthing centers slowly on the rise, women are now seeking all options for a birthing plan. Whether you choose an obstetrician-gynecologist (OB/ GYN), a family physician, a Certified-Nurse Midwife (CNM), or Licensed Midwife (LM) will depend on a number of factors. In Santa Barbara, we are lucky to have various health care professionals to answer your questions and guide you through different ways to experience the birth you want. When you’re ready (or not!), we’ve got some answers that will help you through one of the biggest adventures of your adult life: having a baby.

Laurel Phillips is the founder and a midwife at the Santa Barbara Birthing

Center. Her interest in midwifery began at age 19, and she studied under a local midwife.

After having two children, both at-home births, she began a long apprenticeship followed by 15 years of working in a practice to give her the experience she needed before formally attending midwifery school and getting licensed.

Q. How do you take on new clients?

A.Most people find us through our websites: sbbirthcenter.org or santabarbaramidwifery. com. Next, we guide all new inquiries to an email. Midwives take turns answering inquiries, where they begin a one-on-one dialog with the prospective client right then.

Usually, we have an upcoming group consult within a week’s time wherein interested new families can come to the birth center, look around, and meet with one of the midwives.

We offer about an hour-long introductory talk about how the midwife team works, how the finances work, et cetera, and answer any further questions. At that point, we’ve already emailed the person with this information so she comes into the center pretty wellinformed. Then, within the next few days, they let us know if they want to work with us. This process allows us to have a personal relationship with the client right away.

What kind of accreditation and licensing do you have?

We built the birth center according to all the standards, although licensing is not

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In-Home Services available as well.

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35 W Haley Street, Santa Barbara, CA 93101 805-899-8811 | info@AlchemyWellnessSpa.com

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Local LIBATIONS DEEP SEA FAMILY WINE

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heir inaugural vintage of Cabernet Sauvignon from the highly regarded Happy Canyon of Santa Barbara shows classic Cabernet notes of bright cherry, blackberry, cedar, and sage, with a finish of toasted vanilla and oak notes. Lively tannins, balanced acidity, and ripe fruit are the framework of this elegant wine.

Deep Sea Tasting Room 217 Suite G Stearns Wharf Santa Barbara, CA Mon, Tues, Wed, Sun: noon-8 pm Thurs, Fri, Sat: noon-9 pm

QUICK BITES N

ikki Dailey is head chef and owner of HEAT Culinary based in Carpinteria. She shares with us a personal family favorite with a Nikki twist. “My family is Sicilian and we used to have fig farms. I was raised with figs in everything, and it kind of grew on me – sorry for the pun!” You kidding? We love puns – let’s get figgy with it!

BALSAMIC FIG ICE CREAM TOPPING Ingredients:

2 Capri Figs or Brown Turkey Figs 1 cup balsamic vinegar 1/2 tsp sea salt 1/4 tsp ancho chile powder Vanilla ice cream

Directions:

Pour balsamic vinegar in a small saucepan over medium heat. Bring to a boil and then lessen to a simmer, until the vinegar has reduced to a syrup viscosity (about 3/4 reduction). Cool and set aside. Cut figs in half and brush the open surface with the reduction sauce. Place in 400-degree oven and roast for 10-15 minutes. Remove and transfer to a bowl filled with your favorite vanilla ice cream. Lightly sprinkle fig with sea salt and ancho chile powder for a subtle kick.

(805) 618-1185 conwayfamilywines.com

HEAT Culinary • 4642 Carpinteria Ave, Carpinteria, CA 93013 • (805) 242-1151 heatculinary.com • Instagram + Twitter @HEATCulinary

Raising the Bar FAVORITE BARTENDERS AND SERIOUS COCKTAILS

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hef Ricardo Garcia studied culinary cuisine in his hometown of Guadalajara, Mexico, and has worked with Los Agaves since they opened in 2008 on Milpas Street. His frozen pitaya margarita uses the pitaya fruit (beet-like texture with a kiwi taste) – an idea that came to him one day at the farmers market. Using agave wine instead of tequila presents a modern take on traditional Mexican fare, and the pitaya creates a creamier and imaginative drink worth trying.

Los Agaves • 7024 Market Place Drive, Goleta, CA 93117 • 805.968.7024

TreaTs women’s boutique

Open Daily 1603 Copenhagen Drive Solvang 805.686.4358 www.treatsclothing.com

Treats aren’t just for dogs, they’re for girls too.

Come in and check out our summer apparel.

SPECIAL RECIPES FROM TALENTED CHEFS IN SB

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Additional easy parking in rear, off Mission Drive

FROZEN PITAYA MARGARITA 3 oz. agave wine 1 oz. orange liquor 1/2 pitaya fruit 1 scoop of ice Combine ingredients and blend until smooth. Rub rim of glass with lime and dip in coarse salt if desired. Add lime to garnish.

SweetSpot:

THE

SUGAR CAT STUDIO

“I

ntense,” is one word owner Alison Riede uses to describe Food Network’s Cupcake Wars. (She won in 2011, by the way.) “Cupcakes can be a unique culinary experience with interesting ingredients such as rosemary, camembert, cucumber, and bourbon, and many other herbs and spices,” Alison says. Bourbon?

We’re in! www.sugarcatstudio.com

Where to Taste: Sundays: Corks n’ Crowns 32 Anacapa Street | (805) 845-8600 | 11am until sold-out

Local

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by Christina Enoch

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Zucchini pasta with chicken, asparagus, and creamy avocado coconut sauce

BRUNCHING LIKE A LOCAL The only bar that tastes like real food

meltdown, before my steering wheel gets eaten up.

Her meal delivery service is based on the Paleo diet. The day after I tasted her meal, I bought $50 vegetable spiralizer and I am currently obsessed with it. (Hmm... do I After years of working full time for an ad agency, Christina found her passion in cooking and food.

Now armed with her newfound title, “Culinary School Graduate Food Blogger,” she writes and shares her passion for food, cooking, restaurants, photography and food styling in her popular blog, black dog :: food blog. Christina’s a proud mommy of not one but two shelter dogs and lives here in Santa Barbara with her husband. She’s also an avid Polynesian dancer, beach lover, traveler, swimmer, snowboarder and most of all, a lover of anything edible and yummy. Check out her ramblings here and at www.blackdogfoodblog.com.

I

met this sweet girl at one of my favorite places for workouts, Corepower Yoga.

Cara, “da bomb” instructor, introduced me to a girl who was handing out energy GOGO BAR samples. I don’t usually eat them unless I’m so hungry while driving and about to chew on the steering wheel.

But this GOGO BAR actually tastes like real food. My Savasana that day wasn’t quite Savasana. My brain was full of thoughts – that little sample I had before the class. I ran out the door in sweat-drenched clothes, called her up, got to know her business and herself.

Meet Irina Skoeries. Last year, this beautiful single mom was diagnosed with a supposedly incurable body-crippling disease. She was told that she would never be able to run again in her life, and that her body would only semi-function with daily high doses of intense drugs. She couldn’t even do simple daily chores, let alone cooking. But she decided she didn’t want to live the rest of her life like this; she was determined to heal. Food was her medicine.

Chopping with only one hand, she healed herself with food.

Out of that experience, she created the GOGO BAR and anti inflammatory meal delivery. Irina makes this hand-crafted Paleo energy bar with only pure ingredients:

need a therapy?) I spiralize everything from zucchini, sweet potatoes to turnips.

After three weeks of spiralizing vegetables instead of pasta, I lost all the carbo weight gained during my ramen crawl. With her delicious Paleo dessert/bread, I was not feeling deprived – but feel clean, light, and full of energy. If you don’t have time or simply don’t want to cook, just try her meal delivery. You can even ask for a lowsodium version if you are watching your sodium intake.

She is such an inspiration. Her goal is to help people live full, healthy, and happy lives through her clean food. In addition,10 percent of GOGO BAR profits goes to Angels Foster Care of Santa Barbara. With a success of her business, she hopes to have her own foster child someday.

For her meal delivery, wellness coach, to order Gogo bars, private chef, catering, and even salsa lessons (yes she does it all, including dance), check out her website: www.thedancingchefsb.com

Paleo banana bread

Beautiful Irina with her GOGO BAR

organic peanut butter or almond butter, sunflower seeds, organic coconut, chocolate chips (sweetened with stevia), hemp seed protein powder, honey, organic chia seeds, and pink salt.

I cut them into eight pieces and eat ‘em throughout the day before my hunger Irina’s anti-inflammatory meal delivery.

Paleo, dairy free, grain free, sugar free, legume free, and refined oil free. Shredded kale salad with sunflower seed crumble and blueberry vinaigrette

Sun-dried tomato and broccoli quiche with cashew flour crust

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Local

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POINT VIEW

SPONSORED BY:

A

t Samy’s Camera, the employees use and understand the equipment they sell. If you want the best advice on camera gear, visit your only local camera shop in downtown Santa Barbara, where we match most online prices.

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©Sonny Boyden

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PlantingRoots

by Frederique Lavoipierre Director of education at Santa Barbara Botanic Garden

DON’T BEAT AROUND THE BUSH

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Postpartum mommy group in session at the Santa Barbara Birth Center. Midwives and midwife assistants float in and out during the two-hour support session. The babies in this group range from four to 11 weeks.

What kind of prenatal care do you offer?

From a clinical standpoint, prenatal care is pretty standard, so we offer everything a physician would offer – laboratory testing, referrals for ultrasounds, weighing, measuring, listening to the baby, taking blood pressure, checking urine, etc. – which takes about 10 minutes. We use the next 50 minutes to learn more about the woman – How are you sleeping? How is your relationship? What are you eating? How’s your relationship with your mother? What are you dreaming about? What’s your stress level? What are your hopes and fears around birth and motherhood? – all of these things to help us gauge overall health beyond what you can measure.

We also have lending libraries with books and CDs. We offer childbirth classes, specific to out-of-hospital births. Most of our new parents attend these childbirth classes taught by the midwives and assistants.

Every second Tuesday, we have Group Prenatal or “group” where all the moms are welcome to come. We take two hours to just talk and see what’s going on in their lives.

It’s really important and useful for them to know they are not the only ones going through these major, profound changes.

First-time moms are hearing stories from second- or third-time moms and really getting encouragement from that. This helps them see how normal it is.

How far along are the women who start prenatal care with you?

A majority of our inquiries are writing to us as soon as they get a positive pregnancy test. We do the initial visit between eight to ten weeks. But we’re available through email or through the phone anytime before that.

It’s labor time. What kind of pain-free methods or drugs do you use?

We don’t use drugs for pain relief. A big part of pain relief in labor is being comfortable in your environment and

with your birth team. We take the attitude that labor is doable for women who feel supported and comfortable in their environment. There are exceptions for sure, where a pharmaceutical pain relief or an epidural is appropriate to help the labor progress and that would be a situation where we are going to the hospital, but for the most part, we don’t transfer just for pain relief. It just doesn’t come up. We transfer to the hospital when there’s more of an issue with the labor not progressing and we’ve tried everything we could.

What we use for pain relief is a lot of trust the moms have in us, a really comfortable environment – we have a big birth tub, birth balls, yoga swings, and other birth tools they can use. We have a great support team for them, we feed them and keep them hydrated, and love them! We respect their hard work, we know they can do it, and we transfer that confidence to them.

e love our hedges in Santa Barbara, but choosing plants adaptable to frequent pruning can be especially challenging in our continuing drought. Native shrubs are a great option for hedging, and most need little or no irrigation once established. The Lemonadeberry hedge in the Santa Barbara Botanic Garden Courtyard is more than 70 years old, maintained at 30 inches of height, and is beautiful as ever! Coyote Brush may seem like a surprising choice, but it takes exceptionally well to hedging; choose an upright variety. Our native Wild Cherry is an additional option for an attractive hedge, with its glossy leaves and bright-red fruit. Pacific Wax Myrtle is a worthy choice for shadier locations.

As a bonus, these plants all provide wonderful habitat for wildlife!

La Sumida Nursery | 165 S Patterson Ave | (805)964-9944

Animal House

FABULOUS FELINE

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rasshopper is an adventurous 11-year-old, 11-pound Lynx Point Siamese from ASAP cat shelter. He talks constantly and wiggles his nose when he chews treats. He is leash-trained and can be seen strolling the streets of Santa Barbara with his owner, Sandra Williams. He also adores riding in the car with his nose pushed against the window. Williams says, “He’s truly a joy!” With a face like that, it’s easy to see why.

Is there a limit to the number of people you can have in the room during birth?

There’s not a limit but we do encourage “less is more.” In general, it’s two midwives and an assistant on our side and the mom and the partner, and maybe one other friend or family member. We don’t make any rules about it. It’s really up to them.

When a woman comes in with contractions, what is the first step?

We want them to come in active labor.

It has happened that someone will come in thinking that it’s time to be at the birth center, and she is only one or two centimeters dilated. Most likely, once she gets some loving support to recalibrate to early labor, the woman is going to do better at home where she’s not feeling the pressure to progress if that’s not what the labor is actually doing yet. So, we have sent people home. We have a team of doulas (someone who is trained to give emotional

...continued p.27

To see your pet in ANIMAL HOUSE/Pet of the Week, email a photo, name of pet and owners, and something fun about your pet to megan@santabarbarasentinel.com

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J U LY 1 8 – AU G U S T 1 | 2 0 1 5

5 ThingsYouDidn’tKnowAbout: the

KATIE MCLEAN

Q&A

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enaissance gal Katie McLean is one talented Santa Barbaran. She’s an artist who uses paint, chalk, digital media and design, music (she sings!), and other mediums to express naturalistic vision. In addition, she brings awareness to various nonprofits, most recently Save the Mermaids. At age 22, she was chosen out of 20,000 young women to become Roxy Quiksilver’s North and South America ambassador – and thus spent three years surfing, traveling, and trail running in support of the brand. Oh, she also teaches kickboxing, Pilates, and she’s starting an active wear line called Psychedelic Honey. What can’t this girl do?

with

MICKEY RAPHAEL of

WILLIE NELSON & FAMILY

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1. I live in a 1948 Chevy school bus home named Ophelia perched above Rincon Point built by my surfboard-shaping boyfriend Ryan Lovelace. Legend says it once toured with The Grateful Dead!

2. I lived in Kauai, and I would wear the same comfy bra top to surf, run trails, work out, and under loose tank tops and dresses around town. This is where the lifestyle concept of my new collection Psychedelic Honey’s transitional Surf x Sweat active + swimwear was born. I’m determined to create Santa Barbara’s first local active wear line and support our flourishing health, surf, and outdoors community. Get ready for Psychedelic Honey | Surf x Sweat 2015!

3. Lovelace and I are opening a surf culture shop in downtown Santa Barbara. Planning to open doors in August. Follow @ Trim_shop_SB for more details!

4. I’ve created 10 years of murals at the Santa Barbara Mission for I Madonnari Chalk Painting Festival.

5. When I surf, I can only go right – the curse of being raised on all of Santa Barbara’s perfect right point breaks!

ickey Raphael has been Willie Nelson’s right-hand harmonica man for almost three decades. “When I joined Willie’s band, I really didn’t know anything about country music. I’d never really listened to it at all. I was a folk blues player. I just wanted to play in a country band and ride around in a bus.” Mickey’s wish came true and then some.

See Mickey and the rest of the Willie Nelson family band at the Santa Barbara Bowl with openers Jerry Joseph and Alison Krauss & Union Station on Wednesday, July 22, at 7 pm.

Gypsy Eye • Instagram @gypsyeye805, gypsyeye.com

Take aHike!

Q: Have you ever been to Santa Barbara?

A: Oh, yeah! We played the SB County Bowl when it was just a flat slab of cement with no roof. I love Santa Barbara. If I could retire anywhere, it would be one of my top two choices, and I don’t even know what the other one would be.

by Andy Wood

REPTILE IN THE ROCKS

How does Willie differ from other acts you’ve played with?

He’s the only one that won’t tell me to go away!

He’s a mentor, father, brother, teacher... he’s so many things to me. And I’m a fan. To be able to play every night next to him, I’ve got the best seat in the house! He doesn’t change bands every tour, which a lot of people do and that works for some – but with us, it’s like a family.

T

raveling up Highway 154 along West Camino Cielo Road will lead you to the mouth of a giant lizard-like stone, known as Lizard’s Mouth.

Located on the crest of Santa Ynez Mountains, the Channel Islands and Carpinteria to Goleta view is well worth the 20-to-30-minute drive up. It’s only a quarter-mile hike from the trail head to the actual Lizard’s Mouth formation which, some sources say, was discovered by Steve Tucker in the mid-1960s. Bouldering and sunset watching are key activities on the mountain, as well as numerous picture-perfect photo opportunities with family and friends.

Lizard’s Mouth Los Padres National Forest Highway 154 to West Camino Cielo Road

What advice would you give to your younger self?

Learn to weld.

Why is that?

Learn a trade. I’m kidding, but the most important thing I can tell anybody is learn to listen, and less is more. It’s the quality, not quantity.

Willie Nelson & Family at the Santa Barbara Bowl Wednesday, July 22, 7 pm (805) 962-7411

...continued from p.25

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the

and physical support during labor but do not carry any medical responsibility) for someone in early labor to be an extra layer of support – the doulas who can support them at home. When they are active labor, they come in.

I realize labor varies per person, but generally, how long are women at the birth center?

I would say the average is six to ten hours for labor, sometimes longer. A lot of times, it’s shorter. And they’ll stay for about four to six hours afterward. After the birth, we do all the necessary assessments, suturing (stitching) if necessary, and newborn exam.

We make the family a meal, tuck them all in together in the big bed, assist with breastfeeding, and let them rest and be together. When they’re all stable and ready, and we feel it’s appropriate, they go home.

Then we will visit them at home in the next 24 hours.

Is there a doctor on hand in case of a medical emergency?

We’re independent practitioners, so we don’t have a doctor on hand, and there’s nothing a doctor would be doing that we can’t do at the birth center. When we go to the hospital, we are going for what they have that we don’t have in terms of pharmaceutical relief, more intensive monitoring or interventions, or surgery.

The majority of our transfers, about 15 to 20 percent, is a first-time mom who’s had a long labor that’s not progressing and we’ve tried all of our midwifery tricks, and it’s time to go before the mom or the baby get tired to the point we’re losing options for vaginal birth. We want to preserve the best possible chance for a vaginal birth.

Our C-section rate is about three to five percent. About as low as you can go, and it’s because we get to work with healthy, low-risk women, but it’s also because we are making judicious use of those tools that are available and not waiting until the mom and baby are too tired and don’t have the option of a vaginal birth anymore.

Do you use an ambulance to transfer?

In that particular scenario of a stuck labor, it’s not a rush transfer. We go in our own cars and take our time. There are rare occasions where we need to get to the hospital more quickly. We’re only five blocks from the hospital, so either we’re coming in our cars because it’s quicker, or there are those instances where an ambulance is a better choice. We call to let them know we are coming, and we work with the doctor who is on-call for walk-ins. We really value our relationship with Cottage Hospital and do our best to keep scrupulous communication with them, and we really appreciate how our clients are treated there.

And is there a time limit to how long can

the first couple weeks can be pretty overwhelming so we do home visits postpartum, whether they give birth at home or at the birth center. We’re going to their house at least four times in the first two weeks for hour-long visits to assess breastfeeding, check on the baby, et cetera, so they are getting a lot of followup while also already into the process of having built a community with their fellow pregnant ladies through these classes that we’re offering. We are also checking in daily via email or phone in the first week or so, and the moms know we are available 24/7 by phone.

Laurel Phillips, midwife and founder of the Santa Barbara Birth Center, began midwifery training at age 19. Opened four years ago, the SBBC is the first and only birth center in Santa Barbara.

you stay at the birth center?

I don’t think we’ve had someone at the birth center longer than 15 to 20 hours in active labor before the baby is born. It’s not necessarily a specific number of hours before we say it’s gone on too long, you really have to look at the whole picture.

After birth, do women request to stay overnight?

The birth center itself is not staffed 24/7, we come in as needed for the client. But we’re certainly not going to let anyone go home who isn’t ready to go home. Usually, they feel great and want to be in their own beds.

What kind of postpartum care do you offer?

Things change every single day for women who have just had a baby, and

How do you assist with postpartum depression?

We are screening for that. It’s part of doing the postpartum care and beyond the final home visit at four to six weeks, but in those first couple of weeks we want to make sure the mom and baby are transitioning well. Part of it is to see a woman in her home environment. You see more than if she puts on a brave face, clean clothes, gets in the car, and comes to the office. It’s important to see how she’s really functioning. How much support she’s getting, if there’s food in the fridge, if she has help to keep the house tidy, if she’s drinking enough water, if she’s exhausted... beyond that we are asking those questions that will lead her to let us know how she is really doing. And it’s an important screening because postpartum depression can be really sneaky and there’s a shame and embarrassment around it. We are really wanting to support them during that tricky time through that first month or two.

We tend to stay in touch by phone or email pretty consistently with any

J U LY 1 8 – AU G U S T 1 | 2 0 1 5 |

questions they may have. By that point, we love them. We’ve gone through this intense experience together, it’s a real relationship. We want them to feel as supported as they can.

What is the cost?

The birth center costs $7,000. That’s $2,000 facility fee and $5,000 midwifery fee. That’s pretty much it. Outside of that would be lab work and ultrasounds.

Depending on their insurance, labs and ultrasounds are usually covered. Whether or not we’re covered by insurance depends

...continued p.30

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PLANB by Briana Westmacott

When Briana isn’t lecturing for her writing courses at UCSB and SBCC, she contributes to The Santa Barbara Skinny, Wake & Wander and Flutter Magazine. Along with her passion for writing and all things Santa Barbara, much of her time is spent multitasking through her days as a mother, wife, sister, want-to-be chef and travel junky.

Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability... usually.

BE OF LOVE, BABY The momsto-be (Photo credit Hollie Nass)

M

y little sister is a lesbian. She came out in high school. Her long-term partner has since turned into her wife and the two ladies are expecting their first child any day now. Their story is one filled with heart and soul, accompanied by many interesting lessons in biology as well.

SOMETIMES, BABIES CAN BE A LABOR OF LOVE

A

fter courting and dating and falling deeply in love, my sister Karrin and her partner, Marisa, patiently waited for California to acknowledge that they could legally marry. Their hope and determination carried them forward, and a little more than a year ago they were finally able to make it legit. Soon after the nuptials, baby thoughts began to bubble.

Karrin and Marisa drove hundreds of miles to fertility clinics. They researched and pondered and eventually decided just how they would go about the propagation. The equation would involve

Marisa’s egg and Karrin’s uterus. The sperm, of course, was the missing piece to the puzzle: Spotlight on Donor #45632 – This donor is an aspiring actor! He is charismatic, creative, and outdoorsy. In his free time, he enjoys hiking and going to the beach. He is an impressive 6’2” with brown hair, brown eyes and broad shoulders.

Karrin and Marisa read (and laughed) through thousands of donor descriptions much like this one, combing the sperm banks for semen. In the end of their search, they went with a “known donor,” but this was an unexpected and welcomed twist to their story.

The women began the process by asking people who they knew if they would be willing to donate sperm. The main drive behind this decision was the desire to honor Marisa’s Native American heritage and keep the genetic bloodline pure by using someone from Marisa’s tribe. Also, it is not easy to find Native American sperm in the banks.

Karrin and Marisa were not interested in co-parenting with the known donor; therefore they needed the sperm to come unattached. In the legal documents they had drafted, it’s called “willing to be known” – meaning that the connection could only be made if the child later decides that he or she wants to know more about their genetics.

The ladies met with gentlemen who were willing to donate. However, these meetings did not prove to be successful.

One donor asked, “What will we do for Christmases?” and the gals immediately scratched him off the list. They moved through four men, and all of them seemed to have different notions of how they would play a role in the baby’s life. Once they realized that the known donors might be a bit too entangled in the process, they turned back to the banks.

As they proceeded with the hormone treatments, Marisa’s eggs were harvested.

During this time, fate brought them something special. It was a man from the Black Foot tribe. He had heard of their situation and wanted to help. He said he was honored to provide the final piece to the puzzle and to keep the tribal heritage alive. The eggs and sperm were harvested, and the uterus was ready.

Karrin and Marisa waited and wished

while the fertility clinic let the petri dish magic unfold. It did. They had one good embryo that was implanted in my sister – and lucky for them, that one stuck.

Karrin’s waistline, the family tree, and our knowledge of how life can begin are expanding.

PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE

T

he Supreme Court’s recent dignifying declaration about gay marriage gives my sister and her wife a great deal of hope for the new life they are bringing into this world. We now live in a country where love is able to conquer prejudice and preconceived notions. The door was opened and love has been let in.

The reproduction process for gay couples takes a great deal more than lighting some candles and pouring a glass of wine. It can run close to $20,000 to go through the fertility steps that my sister took. Along with the biological components, there are contracts and legal measures that must be in place. But all of these laborious efforts have paid off, and my sister and her wife are about to have their happy ending.

A baby will be born, and a baby will be loved. And that baby will be a part of a society that embraces and celebrates the emotional binds that exist between all human beings.

BRIANA’S BEST BETS

The cover of the latest edition of Flutter shows two lovely brides celebrating their union. Flutter is a bridal magazine that was founded by Kim Wisely. This mag is so pretty, you won’t want to blink. This also happens to be Flutter’s annual astrology edition, filled with many fun bridal horoscopes that I was given the opportunity to write. Check out all of the publication’s prettiness by ordering a copy at www.fluttermag.com.

Or pick one up at Chaucer’s or Barnes & Noble.

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J U LY 1 8 – AU G U S T 1 | 2 0 1 5 |

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BY Elizabeth Rose

I Heart SB is a social experiment in dating and relationships through stories shared with and experienced by a thirty-something living in the Greater Santa Barbara area. All stories herein are based on actual events. Some names, places, and timelines have been altered to preserve anonymity and, most of all, for your reading enjoyment. Submit stories (maximum 700 words) to letters@santabarbarasentinel.com.

DOES THAT MAKE ME CRAZY? PROBABLY

T

here’s officially a guy in Santa Barbara who thinks I am a crazyass chick. And I can’t blame him.

It was the morning after our first date.

I had plans to surf with a couple of girlfriends and I was eager to fill them in on the details from the night before.

As I made coffee, my phone rings. It’s him! Whoa, that was quick. Do I pick up the phone? I think to myself. “Pick up the phone!,” I say out loud. I was excited he called but felt it was a bit early – I barely had time to pull the typical is-hegoing-to-call girl psychosis. (Damn the “chase”. Damn the games!). It all seemed a little too easy. He said he had a great time last night. (Sweet. I did, too) and wanted to hang out again that evening.

For some reason, I’m reluctant to meet him so soon, but I agree.

I hang up the phone and wonder why I’m being a weirdo. You complain when they call too soon and you complain when they don’t call soon enough. They can’t win!

So freakin’ true. I brush it off, grab my wetsuit and board, and head to Miramar Beach.

As my friends and I paddle out, I give them the details of the night before, explain we are meeting for dinner this evening, and how I was a bit wary to have plans right away. My friends encourage me to “not play games” and to “be honest!” They encourage me to express what I want out of a relationship. “It’s only the second date.

Isn’t it a bit much?” I question. “It will make you feel better, and he will respect you for it!”, one friend says. “Go with the flow!” praises the other. “Yeah, the flow,” I mutter. I’m not buying it, but for some reason I take their advice and do it, anyway. I head home and psyche myself up for a night I will soon want to forget.

I meet Mr. Second Date at Finch and Fork, ready to be open and honest and declare my wants and needs of life and love. It was going to be great, and I would feel a stronger woman because of it! I-am-woman-hear-me-roar and all that jazz. I was pumped. About 30 minutes into dinner, and a glass of wine later, he proposes a simple question that would launch the conversation into the stratosphere. He asks, “What are you looking for in a relationship?” I take a sip

of wine, clear my throat, and muster up whatever courage I could find. “Well,” I begin, “I, um, I...,” Spit it out already! “I want mutual respect. I want a man who will open doors. And for that matter, every woman should be respected and have doors opened for them. Also...”.

And, I’m off. It’s as if I climbed on a soapbox to stand up for womankind, unleashing a beast on this poor soul and there was nothing that could stop me.

At this point in time, I saw myself rise out of my body to observe this crazed

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I head home and psyche myself up for a night I will soon want to forget

r e t a i l e r s lunatic rant on and on and on. There were twists and turns and hand gestures.

Words such as “women’s rights” and “glass ceiling” were thrown about.

Please, God, make it stop! But there was no holding back. His eyes widened with each statement until my 10 minutes of verbal heave had finished.

The end of my speech was met with uncomfortable silence – not the standing ovation-like feeling I hoped for. (It was more of a confused and awkward slow clap.) I was embarrassed and alarmed at this parade of oratory. I made an excuse and told him I had to leave. I didn’t care what he thought. I needed to get the hell out of there and fast. I never looked back.

I’m holding accountable bad advice from good friends, but I can only blame them so much. I am an adult, after all.

Or at least trying to be. I realize how terrible this was for a second date (or third, forth, et cetera), but I had a point to prove and this guy was the target.

So ladies, not to fear. Your voice has been heard (by at least one dude, anyway). I laid out a red carpet of crazy, and there’s nothing I can do except laugh about it, forgive myself, and place the experience in the file of “Things to Never Do Again.” Ever.

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...continued from p.27 on their insurance policy. For example, they would have to have a PPO because HMOs aren’t reimbursing outside of network.

The majority of clients who have a PPO are getting money back, and we have an insurance professional that can help them figure it out.

We founded the birth center as a nonprofit to be able to raise money to help women access this care who wouldn’t be able to afford it otherwise. We have been raising money specifically for the subsidy fund and that helps cover part of that $2,000 facility fee. We’ve given out well over $50,000 donated by the community to access this care.

Pregnancy and birth and the first month’s postpartum is a time of tremendous change and upheaval, joyful though it is. The care we offer is essential to the best transition

possible – new families need all the support they can get! We really want women to have the birth they want, and we as midwives have been really flexible to help people figure out how to work it through payment plans. It’s rare that someone isn’t able to have this birth because of financial reasons if they really want it.

Anything you’d like to add?

We offer a service that women are demanding, and we want to provide it in a way that’s safe and responsible and in line with being sustainable in our community.

It’s not like you’re foregoing all medical technology if you go our route. We’re still referring for ultrasounds, lab testing, genetic testing, and we transfer to the hospital conservatively. We want a good outcome as much as the parents do. It’s

MOMMY’S VIP LIST FOR MOMMY AND BABY PRODUCTS

A birthing room at Santa Barbara Cottage Hospital’s new Birth Center, built in 2012. Labor, birth, and recovery (for the first one to two hours) will take place in this room. (Photo: Cottage Health)

kind of the best of both worlds. If things are progressing with the birth, there’s an opportunity to have the birth experience in a non-medical way and that makes a big difference for women. We’re able to really provide a gentle, quiet birth and really focus on the baby and the bonding of the family with no unnecessary medical intervention.

Women will never forget how they gave birth, and we feel it’s really important to support that.

The Santa Barbara Birth Center 2959 State Street (805) 770-3700 sbbirthcenter.org or santabarbaramidwifery.com

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CARE AT COTTAGE

D

odi Gauthier is an clinical nurse and coordinator of perinatal education and maternal transport at Cottage Hospital.

She has cared for laboring women for almost 40 years and last year was presented with the Distinguished Professional Service Award by AWHONN (Association of Women’s Health, Obstetric, and Neonatal Nurses), the most prestigious award by the association. To this day, she remembers the very first baby she saw born, noting, “It’s really about the moment when I say, ‘I’d like for you to meet your mom.’”

Q. I’m eight to ten weeks pregnant, let’s say. And I’m figuring out where I want to have my baby. What are the first steps Cottage Hospital takes?

A. If you do not have an obstetrician or midwife, we are able to provide you with a list of names of both physicians and nurse midwifes (also called “providers”) who deliver at Santa Barbara Cottage Hospital.

Women who are not insured are referred to the Santa Barbara County Public Health Department. They have tremendous prenatal clinics for various complications with pregnancies and everything you could possibly need help with during pregnancy.

In the midst of your pregnancy, you

Dodi Gauthier received her diploma in nursing from Mercy Medical Center School of Nursing in Oshkosh, Wisconsin, and earned both a master’s degree in education and baccalaureate degree in nursing from Westminster College of Salt Lake City in Utah (Photo: Cottage Health)

would have genetic testing offered to you regardless of where you obtain your prenatal care. We have two perinatologists associated with Cottage located in the Perinatal (which means “around the birth”) Center. They offer genetic screening, ultrasonography around 16 to 20 weeks to determine fetal anatomy, blood tests, and nuchal translucency ultrasounds to help determine if your baby has complications. They will follow up with patients who have risks or concerns associated with the pregnancy. If your pregnancy is somewhat at risk, we have fetal non-stress testing where we monitor you at specific timeframes during the pregnancy or until the issue is resolved. (It’s called “nonstress” because no stress is placed on the fetus during the test.)

Pregnancy is a state of wellness, so the majority of patients aren’t ill, with only 10 to 20 percent of women having a complicated pregnancy. We are really fortunate in this community to have all the services we provide through the Perinatal Center, the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit), a children’s hospital, a stroke center, and a cardiac center. We also have a Level Two trauma center.

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UPCLOSE

Local

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by jacquelyn De Longe

Taking a closer look at the people, places, and things that make Santa Barbara so unique. This freelance writer’s credits include newspapers, magazines, and copywriting. When Jacquelyn is not writing, practicing Pilates or yoga, you can find her chasing her two kids and dogs around Santa Barbara. Contact Jacquelyn at www. delongewrites.com

TACOS, TACOS, TACOS

P

erfect palmfuls of savory pleasure, tacos are a staple in California diets. Whether on the pristine white china of high-end restaurants or the flimsy paper plates of off-the-path taquerias, these versatile finger foods are loved by locals and engrained in our city’s culinary history (just in case it’s been awhile since you went to history class: before the Mexican-American War of 1846, Santa Barbara was part of Mexico).

We crave the warm tortillas filled with a variety of seasoned meats, seafood, vegetables, and garnished with spicy salsa, creamy avocado, or guacamole, cool lettuce, cilantro, and chopped onions. Hot weather and spicy foods go hand in hand, and there is no better summertime finger food than tacos. Santa Barbara certainly has no shortage of eateries to pick from, and luckily some of the best taquerias I’ve found in this town require little planning. They are authentic, unpretentious, casual, and most prefer cash.

TAQUERIA CUERNAVACA 201 W. Carrillo Street easoned meats and spicy salsas are what this downtown restaurant is known for.

Made-to-order tacos are dished out at a rapid rate by this family owned eatery. With a cozy atmosphere, half a dozen tables and quick service, Cuernavaca is an easy go-to lunch spot. Their soft-street style tacos are made with a variety of meats such as asada, pollo, chorizo, and lengua. Try their specialty Al Pastor tacos topped with pineapple!

S

Joaquin Solorzano Sr. and Junior (father/ son) team up to dish out some Al Pasor tacos topped with juicy pineapple

LA SUPER-RICA TAQUERIA 622 N. Milpas Street favorite of the late culinary icon Julia Child, this classic taco stand serves up an ample menu of delicious tacos, burritos, and daily specials with amazing handmade tortillas and sauces. Order anything – you won’t be disappointed, especially the Tacos de Chorizo, spicy sausage on warm tortillas. Cool them off with a dollop of fresh guacamole. Even with the ample patio seating, this place is usually packed. You can be sure there will be a line down the street during lunch time every day. Be forewarned: they take only cash! So get there early and be patient. And yes, it’s really worth the wait.

ROSE CAFE NO.1 424 E. Haley Street his award-winning Mexican restaurant has been around for more than 70 years with a location downtown and one on the Mesa. They dish out hearty tripe menudo, pork and bean tostadas topped high with crisp lettuce and queso fresco, and some of the best beef crispy tacos in town, seasoned ground beef grilled and stuffed inside a hot, crispy fried corn tortilla. Grab a seat at the wrap around counter and enjoy a laid-back meal with a friendly-family atmosphere.

T

Chef Fredrick, executive chef and partner at Rose Cafe, is all smiles as he serves up a lunch favorite, a pork and bean tostada

LILLY’S TACO’S 310 Chapala Street estled in the elbow of the 101, this tiny taqueria serves up some of the most flavorful tacos I’ve ever had.

With the hum of the freeway right on the other side of the chain-link fence, tourist and locals alike line up daily, all day into the night, to get a plate of amazing $1.70 tacos. Pick from a limited selection of steamed or cooked meats (My favorites are the cachete – beef cheek and adobada – marinated pork) and style your tacos as Lilly’s adobado and cachete tacos. There is good reason you like at the ample salsa bar, stocked this taqueria has won numerous awards. with fresh chopped onions, cilantro, salsas, lime wedges, and radish slices. Wash it all down with a classic Mexican soda.

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TACOS EL REY 5 W. Haley Street round the corner from State Street, a nameless storefront marked solely by a flying Mexican flag and a sidewalk signboard is a treasure of Dia de los Muertos decorations and delicious tacos.

The fish tacos are lightly fried and piled high with chunky mango relish and queso fresco, and the spinning Al Pastor is definitely something worth trying. The portobello garlic mushroom tacos and

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Bentura Mendoza keeps the kitchen running smoothly at the super-busy, super-delicious La Super-Rica

Maddie Hoover, with her bubbly personality and cheerful smile, greets customers Cook Nico Hernandez creates El Rey’s street-style dishes faster than you can find a table to sit at

tofu tacos with tomatoes, snow peas, and cilantro are a favorite for veggie lovers.

Their watermelon agua fresco gets rave reviews!

Local

the

...continued from p.30 So for prenatal care, you refer out?

The obstetricians or nurse midwives on staff provide prenatal care. The number of times that you are seen increases during each trimester. It is standardized regardless of who you see throughout the pregnancy.

Do you offer childbirth classes?

Starting late second trimester and early third trimester we offer childbirth classes at the hospital. You learn about pregnancy, danger signs to watch for, how to relax and breathe during labor, what options you have for pain management, and helping you put together a plan so you have the birth that you want. When I taught birthing classes, I would tell people to just be as flexible as possible because you don’t know what you are going to be given for labor. Realize you need a plan B and a plan C as well. We are there to support the choices you make and keep you safe.

What is the first step when a woman comes in with contractions?

When you come into the Birth Center, we perform what is called “triage,” determining the wellness of you and your baby. We offer comfort measures and ways to improve your labor if necessary. If it is too early to be admitted to the hospital, we encourage you to walk on Butterfly Beach or in Oak Park or another place that you feel comfortable.

We encourage you to have as normal and spontaneous a labor that is possible.

Triage also depends on you and how you are coping with the labor you are given.

Sometimes the hospital is the best place for you to be.

I understand you can’t put a schedule on when you may deliver, but are you able to choose the doctors and nurses you work with for the labor?

Actually, your physician will be the person who takes care of you. Your provider will explain to you their “call system” and let you know which other providers work with them or take “calls” for them. So, you may see a variety of them during your pregnancy.

Are doulas available?

The hospital does not provide that service, but there are many doulas in the community. We have a collaborative working relationship with you and your doula.

What pain-relief options are available?

We have opportunities for medications if you need them. You can have it in your birthing plan or whenever you want it. And we realize you can change your mind. We have hydrotherapy (Jacuzzi) tubs that are remarkable. It relieves pain in your back, your neck, your abdomen with 99-degree water, and it has jets directed at sites of pain. We are so lucky we have them in all the birthing rooms. There’s also a peanut ball – an actual physical-therapy ball shaped like a peanut – we use for a variety of things. But we also are supportive of non-medicated births and want to help you in any way we can.

So what about the infamous epidural?

About 70 percent of our patients request epidurals. We have days where every patient has an epidural, and we have days where no one has one. Epidurals are fantastic when your labor is really long and you need rest, you’re not making any progress, if your baby is in a un-ideal position in your pelvis, or you “just can’t take it anymore.” Our epidurals are standardized and are given with a little bit of a narcotic with a local anesthetic.

They are patient-controlled. At first, the physician/anesthesiologist administers a big dose, then you can give yourself small doses throughout your labor as you need them.

Epidurals may be placed anytime during labor. They have side effects, of course – you can’t get out of bed after you’ve had one, you have to have your blood pressure monitored frequently, you must be on continuous fetal monitoring, and you have to have an IV. It takes about 80 percent or more of what you are feeling away. People ask for them when they are ready.

At what point does it turn into a C-section?

If the baby is breech, in a non-head-first position (only about four percent of babies are breech at term), or if the baby won’t tolerate labor. The other big reason is if you’ve had a previous cesarean. Only large academic hospitals really support vaginal birth after cesarean.

What is the percentage of C-sections at Cottage?

At our facility, it’s 30 percent. This includes first time and repeats. Our repeats are the higher number. That is about what the rate is across the country.

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Do you have a private room when you give birth?

Oh yes, you have a suite! There’s a couch that folds out for your partner to stay. The whole idea of the woman sitting up in labor is so important. We have various things you can be in, so you’re not in the bed until you have to be. We have all the equipment we need in each room, so we really don’t have to bring in anything. There’s a radiant warmer for the baby, just in case we need to do resuscitation, procedures, or a better assessment. We try to do that when the baby is on your chest.

How many people are in the room during delivery?

Our policy says you can have three people, because we’re concerned about safety and being able to move about the room in case there is an emergency. We really are about, “just in case”. Safety is number one.

You have your provider, a primary nurse, and a second nurse who comes in for the delivery, as well as the NICU team, if needed.

We also have a technician that circulates and gets whatever is needed and is unobtrusive in the room really staying behind the curtain for privacy.

We have a program patients can sign up for called “Welcome Every Baby” (WEB), which is a follow-up home visit by a nurse.

How much does it cost to have a baby at Cottage?

While each delivery is unique — and length of stay and costs vary for each patient — the amount paid by insured patients averages $1,700, and Medi-Cal patients have no payment. Our Admitting Department works with each patient to discuss birth plans, insurance coverage and assist with payment plans when needed. We welcome inquiries to create individual care plans and discuss any payment questions families have.

Santa Barbara Cottage Hospital 400 West Pueblo Street (805) 682-7111 cottagehealthsystem.org.

What happens immediately after the baby is delivered?

When the baby is born, it’s brought to your chest and placed skin-to-skin where it is nice and warm. The baby is dried and stimulated, suctioned if necessary, and covered. Skin-to-skin is really important for both mother and baby, so during any assessments, when possible, they are performed skin-to-skin. We do delayed cord clamping with healthy newborns, so the cord is cut within five minutes or so, and it’s usually cut by the partner. The placenta is delivered. A few of our patients ask to take the placenta home and they may after a release has been signed, since it is biohazardous material.

Generally speaking, how long do mothers stay after delivering?

After you have your baby, you are here 24 to 96 hours depending on the method of delivery and how well you are doing.

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CINEMA SCOPE

by James Luksic A longtime writer, editor and film critic, James has worked

nationwide for several websites and publications – including the Dayton Daily News, Key West Citizen, Topeka Capital-Journal and Santa Ynez Valley Journal. California is his eighth state. When he isn’t watching movies or sports around the Central Coast, you can find James writing and reading while he enjoys coffee and bacon, or Coke and pizza.

Hot and Heavy

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nybody who manages to keep the faith during this cinematic summer will be rewarded sooner than later.

My excitement for Ant-Man isn’t much more than insect-sized, despite my appreciation for Michael Douglas and Paul Rudd, while Amy Schumer’s concurrent star vehicle Trainwreck offers larger appeal (in the towering form of LeBron James).

But since I’m partial to dramas, especially of the nonfiction variety, additional imminent films stand out: Legend, starring a double dose of Tom Hardy as twin mobsters, directed by L.A. Confidential screenwriter Brian Helgeland; Straight Outta Compton, a biopic about the seminal hip-hop group NWA, spotlights Ice Cube, Dr. Dre, and Eazy E, with support from Paul Giamatti; Southpaw, as helmed by Antoine Fuqua (Training Day), places Jake Gyllenhaal in the ring before and after his wife’s death (not a spoiler if you’ve seen the ubiquitous trailer); lastly, Meryl Streep and Carey Mulligan join forces in the seriousminded Suffragette.

Until those penetrate the Central Coast, among your ongoing options are Ted 2 (during which I laughed hard a few times but can’t in good conscience recommend it, except if paying matinee prices); laudable Me and Earl and the Dying Girl, with plenty to offer by way of pathos and dark laughs among students including a cancer patient, despite its unknown cast; and the

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unremarkable Self/Less, a sci-fi caper wherein Ben Kingsley exits early, so we’re left with Ryan Reynolds switching identities and on the lam – often popping pills to offset hallucinations – while Matthew Goode (The Imitation Game) sporadically materializes in a lab coat to reassure everyone it’s all right.

You shouldn’t have much difficulty finding those movies around.

That leaves a pair of pictures: one that warrants a spot among my year’s Top 10, and another whose creators owe us an explanation, if not a refund:

Fade to Black

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my is an insightful, if uncomfortable and devastating documentary (a biopic or rockumentary, if you will) diligently following the rapid rise and fall of singersongwriter Amy Winehouse, who died in 2011 in London, where she was born 27 years earlier. As those familiar with Winehouse’s work (which includes tender duets with Tony Bennett) well know, the woman’s soulful voice that stretched across demographics couldn’t halt her depression, alcoholism, and drug addiction. It was as if, as one of her friends muttered before the songstress’s final curtain call, “she wanted to vanish.” Meanwhile, the ruthless paparazzi – to paraphrase a lyric from my favorite Winehouse tune – sniffed her out like Tanqueray.

In the hands of India’s Asif Kapadia, this chronicle is a successful exercise of converting potential trash into artful and profound entertainment. He oversees the delicate production with sufficient spirit, confidence, and savvy – particularly when employing footage of Winehouse’s ex-husband, Blake Fielder, and her father, Mitch (who remains angry about Kapadia’s version of events). It often bristles with authentic eloquence, not the least when lyrics superimposed on screen prove as self-deprecating as prescient: “I cheated myself.” The endeavor is not, let’s be clear, easy on the eyes or the heart. But Amy is the type of achievement that will be defended decades from now, if I’m still around and allowed to convey my opinion.

Shallow Gallow

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he Gallows is another sub-par horror flick (presumably via a shoestring budget) involving popular students – the most insufferable of whom records every tedious moment with the same herky-jerky videocam method as did a participant in last year’s unwatchable French fraud As Above, So Below. This misfire’s plot is thin as Leatherface’s skin mask: all hell breaks loose the night before the titular play is revived for the first time in 20 years, when that production saw a thespian inadvertently hanged. Is the deceased’s ghost now looming backstage?

Although the movie demonstrates a mindfulness of its own limitations (e.g., a static camera) the same could be said of predecessors The Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity; in other words, The Gallows can be considered neither groundbreaking nor a novelty anymore. Despite clocking in at a meager 85 minutes, it’s glacial in movement, not to mention dismal in lighting. Chills prove hard to come by; boredom is more pervasive. And the chatty, overzealous “cameraman” and narrator makes us less fearful for the guy’s well-being than eager for his demise.

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