Kindness Matters

KINDNESS MATTERS

BY CHARLOTTE TURLINGTON, PRIMARY ADVISOR

"Developing a culture of KINDNESS at SAA foster happiness in our boys, our staff, and our families."

It’s the second week of school, and the After School Care program is in full swing on our playground. A group of 2nd graders are playing their well-loved game of Speedball. A very new and nervous Pre-K boy is observing them with admiration. A swift 2nd grader catches the ball and runs to score. As he’s running down the field he notices this little boy watching him. He pauses the game, and invites the new and nervous Pre-K boy to join in. Understandably, this boy is timid, but he joins the group. No words need to be spoken to the rest of the boys. It is understood what needs to happen next. The ball is passed to the Pre-K player, and his teammates guard him as he runs to the other end of the field to score. His opponents are in on it too, but don’t let him know that. The pride in his eyes is radiant, but the happiness that beams from the 2nd grader is even stronger.

At San Antonio Academy, kindness matters. Everything we think, say and do affects others, and that is at the core of what we try to teach the boys who attend our school. They hear messages all the time about the importance of kindness through chapel talks from Mr. DuBose, from their teachers in class, or from the Primary School Advisor during a guidance lesson. Kindness promotes compassion, a sense of belonging and happiness.

The buddy system we have at SAA between the primary school boys and the upper school boys is one of a kind. The joy and excitement you see during one of our many “buddy” events is contagious. Pairing the younger boys with the older guys provides that valuable opportunity to teach and model exactly what it means to be honest, be kind, and the best you can be. The 1st grade Bike Race provides a perfect example. The 7th grade boys traditionally serve as the older helpers. Witnessing these moments of true kindness that happen naturally is quite emotional. The rallying around a fallen rider to an epic victory for the final winner; it makes for one of our favorite events of the school year.

The 1st Grade Bike Race is a decades-long Academy tradition which provides an opportunity for the younger boys to be mentored by the older guys through teamwork, encouragement, and often, that extra help getting their little buddy over the finish line in the quest for the “Yellow Jersey.”

As the Primary School Advisor, I wear lots of hats. I might be the person a boy confides in about how he’s feeling that day, a person to check-in or reset with, or to emphasize the important social and emotional skills that are taught in chapel or class each day. I always begin the year with some sort of “Kindness Campaign.” I incorporate books such as A Little Spot of Kindness, by Diane Alber, and I also use positive reinforcement like our “Throw Kindness like Confetti” board, or our “Great Wall of Kindness.” These visuals serve as reminders for the students to spread kindness inside and outside of school. Research shows that performing acts of kindness boosts happiness. Practicing kindness every day creates habits in our boys to treat others with compassion.

According to Thomas Lickona, the author of How to Raise Kind Kids, acts of kindness, big and small, keep us all going. Some are a common and natural occurrence, such as holding the door open for someone, but others take courage. Those acts of kindness need to be nurtured and taught. Our goal at SAA is to offer these messages to our boys at every opportunity. Developing a culture of kindness at SAA fosters happiness in our boys, our staff and our families.

There is a feeling that hits you when you step foot on this campus. It’s an overwhelming feeling of “home.” Kindness matters.

Last year’s Kinder Community Service Project spread kindness to the soldiers serving in Syria by sending each of the 22-member 1/3 Regiment Calvary a care package accompanied with a hand-made thank you card. Watch this touching video at vimeo. com/saawildcatstv/ kinder-cares to see how their seeds of kindness bloomed into a meaningful experience for all.

#HaircutForKindness was the trending topic last spring when Admissions Director Gary Marvin ’89 asked cadets to heed the call and get a haircut in time for inspection. The participants who used the hashtag and posted a picture of their haircut to social media received an extra dessert at the café. What a fun way to motivate boys to look sharp while reminding them to also be kind.