Faith & Friends June 2019

Sheriff Woody Returns

TOY STORY 4 P.8

A Life On Her Own Terms

MAJOR BETTY P.22

Total Recall?

SAY MY NAME P.10

Faith&Friends I N S P I R AT I O N F O R L I V I N G

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JUNE 2019

Like Father …

THE NFL’S MATTHEW SLATER WOULDN’T BE THE MAN HE IS WITHOUT HIS DAD. P.16

“ Go up and down the streets of Jerusalem .... If you can find but one person who deals honestly and seeks the truth, I will forgive this city.”—Jeremiah 5:1

and dignity in the simple, humble gestures of daily living. A family centred around Jesus.

It only takes one person to make a huge impact on others. Canadian Jean Vanier (above) founded L’Arche (The Ark), now in 47 communities in 35 countries on five continents.

And all it took was one person—in this case, Jean Vanier. And there are many other persons who impact the world in marvellous ways. Some might even be your next-door neighbours. One of them might even be you!

L’Arche communities are places or homes where people with and without intellectual disabilities can live and work together. They feel called to live in the way of the gospel, as family. A family of the poor, weak, challenged. A family that rises above prejudice and fear of difference. A family that finds meaning

The lives of thousands upon thousands of people have been changed for the better, and will continue to be.

No matter the situation, will you be the one person who God can count on?

To learn more about the power of one, email us at faithandfriends@can. salvationarmy.org or visit your local Salvation Army church.

Beverly A. Ivany, Words of Life September-December 2016, London, England Photo: Warren Pot, L’Arche Daybreak

The Power of One

June 2019

VOLUME 22 NUMBER 6

5

SIGNS & WONDERS 5 Seeing Things

With the miracle of Blind Bartimaeus, Jesus asked a question He still poses today.

FAITH BUILDERS 8 Toy Story 4

Sheriff Woody, Buzz Lightyear and company help a new friend answer an old question.

COMMON GROUND 10 Total Recall?

Unlike Jeanette Levellie, there is someone who never forgets a name— and with good reason!

FEATURES

13

COVER STORY

16

22

Lifesaver

David Jeanvenne owes The Salvation Army his life.

Like Father …

The NFL’s Matthew Slater wouldn’t be the man he is without his dad.

Major Betty

Faith helped her be at peace with her fate in life.

Cover photo: Courtesy of the New England Patriots/Eric J. Adler

8

BETWEEN THE LINES 12 TGIF? TGIM!

A new book argues that we need to stop working for the weekend and start working for the week.

LITE STUFF 28 Eating Healthy With Erin

Sudoku, Quick Quiz, Word Search.

NIFTY THRIFTY 31 #1 Dad

Craft the perfect gift for Father’s Day. faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

FROM THE EDITOR

Heads Up!

D

uring this year’s National Football League AFC overtime game, wide receiver and Special Teams captain Matthew Slater called the coin toss that gave his New England Patriots possession of the football. Not only did they go on to win the match but they advanced to the Super Bowl, which they also won.

Writer Jayne Thurber-Smith asked Matthew why he chose heads over tails. It turns out that when his father, Hall of Famer Jackie Slater, was involved in coin tosses, he always chose heads because God is the head of his life.

“Like father, like son,” smiles Jayne.

Matthew’s story is on page 16.

Putting God at the head of your life doesn’t mean putting yourself last. It means taking the time to get to know who you were created to be, letting go of what others might think about you, and following your heart. Trusting in God is profoundly liberating and joyful.

Major Betty McCaughey also had God at the head of her life. The elderly Salvation Army pastor was admitted to hospital. The prognosis was grave, but Major Betty’s faith shone through, inspiring everyone around her. Her touching final days were chronicled by her doctor, and his story is on page 22.

Elsewhere in this month’s Faith & Friends, you can read our take on the new Toy Story 4 movie, in theatres now, find out how a Salvation Army institution in Ottawa helped a struggling man, and you’ll see the significance in the plea a blind beggar made to Jesus.

Ken Ramstead 4 • JUNE 2019 I faithandfriends.ca

Mission Statement To show Christ at work in the lives of real people, and to provide spiritual resources for those who are new to the Christian faith.

Faith & Friends is published monthly by: The Salvation Army 2 Overlea Blvd, Toronto Ontario, M4H 1P4 International Headquarters 101 Queen Victoria Street, London, EC4P 4EP, England William and Catherine Booth FOUNDERS

Brian Peddle, GENERAL Commissioner Susan McMillan TERRITORIAL COMMANDER

Lt-Colonel John P. Murray SECRETARY FOR COMMUNICATIONS Geoff Moulton, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ken Ramstead, EDITOR

Brandon Laird DESIGN AND MEDIA SPECIALIST

Timothy Cheng SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER Pamela Richardson, COPY EDITOR, PRODUCTION CO-ORDINATOR

Ada Leung CIRCULATION CO-ORDINATOR

Kristin Ostensen STAFF WRITER, PROOFREADER

Giselle Randall STAFF WRITER Scripture Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture references are taken from New International Version Contact Us P. (416) 467-3188, F. (416) 422-6217 Websites faithandfriends.ca, salvationist.ca, salvationarmy.ca Email faithandfriends@can.salvationarmy.org Subscription for one year: Canada $17 (includes GST/HST); U.S. $22; foreign $24 P. (416) 422-6119 circulation@can.salvationarmy.org All articles are copyright The Salvation Army Canada & Bermuda and cannot be reproduced without permission.

Publications Mail Agreement No. 40064794 ISSN 1702-0131

Faith&Friends

SIGNS & WONDERS

Seeing Things With the miracle of Blind Bartimaeus, Jesus asked a question He still poses today.

Photos: © LUMO/LightStock.com

by Jennifer Hale

O

ne of my greatest fears is darkness. This might seem odd to some—a mother of two children who is afraid of the dark—but the reason why is that I have trouble seeing. While I haven’t been diagnosed with night blindness, the doctors have said it takes my eyes much longer than usual to adjust to darkness.

So perhaps it’s not surprising that one of my favourite Bible stories is about another person who has

trouble seeing—Blind Bartimaeus, who had an encounter with Jesus that changed the course of his life.

A Matter of Trust Jesus was passing through Jericho on His way to Jerusalem for what would be the final days of His earthly life, a journey leading Him to the cross. Along the way, Jesus was still changing lives in spite of what He knew lay ahead of Him. “As Jesus approached Jericho, a

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SIGNS & WONDERS

blind man was sitting by the roadside begging” (Luke 18:35). It’s important to note that people in Jericho were very aware of an event that occurred just a couple of weeks before in the village of Bethany, where Jesus raised a man named Lazarus from the dead.

So Jesus was the focus of attention.

Was He the Messiah? Was He about to establish His kingdom? What was going to happen next?

Imagine the hustle and bustle as crowds of people made their way to Jerusalem for the Passover festival.

Yet Luke, the Gospel writer, focused on one person: Bartimaeus.

“When [Bartimaeus] heard the crowd going by, he asked what was happening. They told him, ‘Jesus of Nazareth is passing by.’ He called out, ‘Jesus, Son of David, have mercy

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on me!’ ” (Luke 18:36-38).

In those days, people were known by their town. But notice the blind man didn’t say, “Jesus of Nazareth.”

Instead he called out, “Jesus, Son of David.”

Jesus, descendant of King David, was fulfilling the promise of God that a Messiah would come through the line of David. And Bartimaeus was confirming his faith that Jesus was the coming Redeemer.

Cast aside by the world, in anguish and desperate—the word that the Gospel writer Matthew uses for “call” was “scream”—Bartimaeus blindly believed that Jesus was the only one who could help him.

Remarkable Transformation “Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him” (Luke 18:40).

“ God looks at a person’s heart, not his social status.” JENNIFER HALE The surrounding culture ignored Bartimaeus, but Jesus, despite the blind man’s lack of position in the world, responded to his cry for help.

God looks at a person’s heart, not his social status.

Jesus wanted to meet him at his point of need. In Mark’s account of the same story, “Jesus stopped and said, ‘Call him.’ So, they called to the blind man, ‘Cheer up! On your feet!

He’s calling you.’ Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus” (Mark 10:49-50).

There was nothing to think about, nothing to consider. Bartimaeus cast off his robe—likely his only earthly possession—and came to Jesus.

And when he did, Jesus asked him, “What do you want Me to do for you?” And the man said, “Lord, I want to see.” The Bible says the man immediately regained his sight and he followed Jesus. Bartimaeus not only regained his physical sight but his spiritual eyes were opened as well—he received salvation. He went from a despised, rejected beggar to a friend of God.

happening here than the gift of sight.

This miracle reveals a basic spiritual truth about seeking and finding one’s way on the path to God. Ironically, while many struggled to see who Jesus was—many in the crowd, in a short while, would be shouting to crucify Him—a blind man had full clarity of vision.

By declaring Jesus as the promised Messiah, as the One who has the power to restore sight to humanity, Bartimaeus’ faith led to his restoration.

Perhaps like the blind man, you, too, find yourself in a desperate situation. I know what it is to be in the dark—both physically and spiritually—but I’m thankful that as a result of my faith, my spiritual sight has been restored and my life now has meaning and purpose.

Just like the call that raised Lazarus from the dead, Jesus wants to resurrect the dark places of our lives. And He still asks the question today: “What do you want Me to do for you?”

What will your answer be?

Life-Giving Answer There is something much deeper

Major Jennifer Hale is the secretary for candidates at The Salvation Army’s territorial headquarters in Toronto.

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Faith&Friends

FAITH BUILDERS

To Infinity and Beyond … Take 4

Photo: Courtesy of Disney/Pixar

In Toy Story 4, Sheriff Woody, Buzz Lightyear and company help a new friend answer a question as old as time: Why am I here?

by Diane Stark

I

t’s been nine years since the last Toy Story installment, when we tearfully watched as Andy went away to college, leaving Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen), Sheriff Woody (Tom Hanks) and his other toys in little Bonnie’s enthusiastic hands (Emily Hahn). The fourth Toy Story movie, in theatres June 21, picks up where Toy Story 3 left off. The film includes some returning favourites, as well as some new toys joining Bonnie’s bedroom.

This all-star cast includes Joan Cusack returning in her role as Jessie the Cowgirl, John Ratzenberger as Hamm and Michael Keaton as Ken.

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After being mysteriously absent in Toy Story 3, Annie Potts returns as Bo Peep.

Tony Hale voices Forky, a new toy that Bonnie creates by adding pipe cleaner arms and googly eyes to a spork. “I’m not a toy!” Forky says, but he doesn’t see himself as a spork anymore, either. “I don’t belong here!”

Why is he here? Declaring himself “trash,” he wonders why Bonnie would want to play with him anyway.

When Bonnie takes her toys on a

family road trip and Forky runs away, Buzz and Woody chase after him, hoping to convince him to return to Bonnie’s room. They end up at a carnival where they encounter Ducky (Keegan-Michael Key) and Bunny (Jordan Peele), as well as the long-lost Bo Peep. Woody is understandably

aimless and unimportant, but the Bible tells us that the opposite is true.

1 Peter 2:9 says, “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light.”

The same God who put the stars in the sky created you and me. DIANE STARK distracted by her, but he remembers that Forky needs him.

When they find Forky, Woody tells him that if he is willing to be a toy, he can make Bonnie happy.

“Bringing happiness is what gives us life,” Woody says.

Can Woody and Buzz convince Forky that Bonnie created him for a purpose and that she loves him just as he is?

Eternal Love In the Bible’s Book of Genesis, we are told that God created the earth and every living creature on it. He put the fish in the ocean and the birds in the sky. He made the sun and the moon.

He turned darkness to light. The same God who put the stars in the sky created you and me.

Knowing that can make us feel small. We may wonder what the purpose for our lives is. We may feel

God chose us, and we belong to Him. He created us for a unique purpose: to live in the light with Him. That’s no small thing. God created us because He wanted companions.

He enjoys spending time with us, but He also wants us to ask Him for help when we need Him. In short, God loves us, and He created us to love Him back.

Just as Bonnie brought a spork to life with pipe cleaners and googly eyes, God gave us life. And just as Forky’s job is to bring happiness to the little girl who made him, our purpose is to bring happiness to our Creator.

Not by being super holy, but simply by spending time with Him. There’s nothing He wants more.

After all—to borrow Buzz Lightyear’s catchphrase—God loves us to infinity and beyond.

And He always will ... for eternity and beyond.

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Faith&Friends

COMMON GROUND

Total Recall?

Unlike me and my faulty memory, there is someone who never forgets a name—and with good reason!

by Jeanette Levellie

What’s in a Name?

When she couldn't remember who she was while answering a call, Jeanette Levellie realized her memory for names was a thing of the past

L

inda, the loan officer at our bank, extended her hand to shake mine.

“Hi, Jessica,” she said. We’d met the day before, so I was surprised she’d already forgotten my name.

“It’s Jeanette,” I replied, trying not to show my annoyance. But on the way home, I told my husband how I really felt.

“I think it’s rude and insensitive that a person who works with the public doesn’t bother to try and

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remember people’s names.” I was more than a wee bit proud of my excellent memory.

When I was in Grade 3, my mother taught me some fun tricks for remembering the names of new faces. Throughout my life, I used those tricks to help make friends. After I married a pastor, I worked extra hard at recalling names, so our church members would feel important. Folks often complimented me when

I remembered their name after meeting them only once. I’d smile and say, a little too smugly, “People are important to me.” I had little tolerance for those like Linda, who seemed too busy to care.

Wake-up Call But the year we moved to a rural church, my remarkable memory began to falter. At an event, I called Martha “Ruth.” When one of the other ladies said in a loud voice, “Sit here by me, Martha,” I knew she was correcting my error without embarrassing me. Still, I was mortified.

Were Mom’s tricks failing me?

The wake-up call came at my job, where I was switchboard operator and front desk receptionist of a local bank. My duties included creating reports and spreadsheets. One afternoon while I was concentrating on a task for the board of directors, the switchboard rang. I had to wrench my thoughts away from the report and force myself to answer the ringing. Finally, on the third ring, I said into the receiver, “Citizens Bank, this is ….”

I had forgotten my own name!

Although I quickly recovered, even laughing at my faux pas, I realized my memory for names was a thing of the past. I had to say goodbye to my selfrighteous attitude and develop more understanding of forgetful people.

These days, I often find myself

saying, “What’s your name again? I apologize for not recalling it.” People smile when I admit my memory isn’t as great as it once was.

Unforgettable You Our names are important to God, too.

From before the world was shaped, He knew each of us and had a perfect, magnificent plan for our lives.

My remarkable memory began to falter. Were Mom’s tricks failing me? JEANETTE LEVELLIE And unlike me, He never forgets a name.

Isaiah 49:15-16 says, “Can a mother forget her nursing child?

Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! See, I have written your name on the palms of My hands” (New Living Translation). God is so in love with us, so thoughtful of our needs, that He’s placed our names where He will see them often: on His hands.

We are forever on His mind.

Unlike Linda, me or any of us, He never forgets a name.

In the heart of God, we are unforgettable.

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Faith&Friends

BETWEEN THE LINES

TGIF? TGIM! We need to stop working for the weekend and start working for the week, says Paul Bartlett in his new book.

by Paola Theaker

T

GIF (Thank God It’s Friday)

is a phrase heard in schools, offices and workplaces around the world, demonstrating that we live in a culture that celebrates Friday afternoons and dreads Monday mornings. Research shows that 70 percent of people who start their week on Monday regularly ask themselves, “Why am I here?”

Pastor and author Paul Bartlett set out to uncover why. He argues we should be wary about a TGIF lifestyle because it comes from the age-old idea that work is demeaning, unfulfilling and unspiritual. If everybody’s working for the weekend, they are missing out on God’s purposes for their lives.

Bartlett penned Thank God It’s Monday to encourage Christians and non-Christians alike to look forward to Monday mornings. He argues that when we reframe the start of a new week as an opportunity for growth and change and begin living out our purpose weeklong, incredible things happen.

“In order to move from a TGIF

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lifestyle to a TGIM mindset,” writes Bartlett, “we need to put our faith into practical action from Monday to Saturday. How? By understanding that the mission we’re called to is predominantly worked out throughout the week.”

The chapter headings give a clue: • It’s not about us • It’s not about the building • It’s not about the pastor • It’s not about Sundays • It’s about the whole week • It’s about people • It’s about serving others “Of course, we love weekends,” says Bartlett, “but we should be even more excited for Monday. Because Monday is when we go to work or school and that’s where we’re positioned to engage with people, whether they are people of faith or not. I set out to write Thank God It’s Monday out of an overwhelming passion to ensure that we live every day with purpose and have an influence on those around us. And it all begins on Monday.”

Faith&Friends

FEATURE

Photo: © LOUOATES/iStock.com

Lifesaver

DAVID JEANVENNE OWES THE SALVATION ARMY HIS LIFE. NOW, WITH THE HELP OF THE TRANSITIONAL HOUSE IN OTTAWA, HE IS LEARNING TO SUPPORT OTHERS SUFFERING FROM ADDICTIONS.

by Caroline Franks

I

“

made the conscious decision in jail not to give up on my faith,” says David Jeanvenne. “I was sitting in a jail cell weighing out my options: continue using drugs or get some help.”

After he was released from jail, David was put in contact with The Salvation Army and completed the

Anchorage addiction program in Ottawa in 2018. He now lives at The Salvation Army Transitional House where he continues his recovery.

Self-Destructive Path David, now 53, is one year clean. It’s been a long hard road for him, starting at the young age of 12 when he faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

FEATURE

“ My goals now are to be a real father and be a real man.” DAVID JEANVENNE began smoking pot. By the age of 13, he was using cocaine. By 14, David was living on the streets.

“I didn’t have the best role models growing up,” he says. “My mother was an escort and an alcoholic and my only memory of my father is of him being in a federal penitentiary.”

David explains he suffered every type of abuse imaginable as a child from neglect, assault and sexual abuse.

“My siblings suffered, too,” he says. “And then I made some really bad choices. We are all broken in our own way.”

David says his first attempt at recovery began four years ago. He got clean because he was about to lose his family.

“I was one year clean but I was faking it, I was doing it for the wrong reason,” he says.

“Before that, I held jobs and ran businesses, but I always went back to cocaine and being self-destructive,” says David. “When I relapsed, I sold everything at home and committed crimes. I did some horrible things and hurt a lot of people along the way.”

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Reaching Out David says it was during that time that he experienced what he describes as a divine intervention that changed his life.

“Something special happened and I started to believe that God existed,” says David.

After being released from jail, David wanted to choose a Christianbased recovery program, and that is how he came to The Salvation Army.

“It was while I was in jail that I started to reach out to God on a more intimate basis. I was able to talk to Him about my experiences,” he says.

Learning to Support David still lives with PTSD and insomnia from the traumas he has lived through.

“I pray to God every morning, I pray at every meal and I ask Him to forgive me every night,” he says.

“My goals now are to be a real father and be a real man. I have two beautiful sons and an amazing, forgiving wife.”

David is focusing on his recovery at The Salvation Army Transitional

House, attending AA meetings and meeting with a psychologist.

“If it wasn’t for The Salvation Army, trust me, I wouldn’t be here today. I would be dead,” says David.

“I reach out to a staff member at the Anchorage program weekly, sometimes daily. She gives me new ideas and support, and she is very strong in her faith.

“The Salvation Army is an amazing place filled with honest and

warm people. It saved me,” says David. “If you put the work into your recovery and you follow their guidelines and stay true to yourself, it’s going to work.”

As for the future, David dreams of one day learning to support others who are suffering from addictions.

“I know it’s going to be a big hurdle, but I would like to get into the field to give back,” says David. “I owe The Salvation Army my life.”

Place of Hope The Salvation Army’s Transitional House in Ottawa is a non-profit housing program that provides short-term affordable lodging with minimum support to 16 men, many with backgrounds that include homelessness, addictions, incarceration and mental illness.

The facility offers a fresh start for men seeking to achieve a successful transition from the streets to community living. At Transitional House, the men pursue independent living, develop socialization skills and learn how to live within their means.

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Faith&Friends

COVER STORY

Like Father …

THE NFL’S MATTHEW SLATER WOULDN’T BE THE MAN HE IS WITHOUT HIS DAD.

by Jayne Thurber-Smith

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Photo: Courtesy of the New England Patriots/Eric J. Adler

Taking a Knee Matthew Slater (second from left) leads a prayer with both New England Patriots and Washington Redskins players after a game at Gillette Stadium

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Faith&Friends

COVER STORY

Photo: Courtesy of the New England Patriots/Eric J. Adler

Setting an Example “It’s important to be aware of how blessed we are,” says Matthew, who is one of the team’s most active members in community service

WHEN THE NEW ENGLAND Patriots’ Matthew Slater won his second of three Super Bowl rings in February 2017, his father and Hall of Famer Jackie Slater was there to congratulate him. Matthew gave his dad a huge hug, tearfully telling the nearby cameraman who captured it: “This is my hero here!

I was thinking about him all the game. I’m just so thankful for my dad.”

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Besides watching his son’s team win the Super Bowl, that weekend Jackie was also on hand at the annual Super Bowl breakfast.

On that morning, Matthew was awarded the Bart Starr Award, given annually by his peers to a player who demonstrates strength of character on and off the field. Jackie, who played 20 years for the Los Angeles Rams organization, had received the very same honour in 1996.

“ The call to being a dad is not to be perfect but to show you care by investing your time and love.” MATTHEW SLATER Godly Parents Matthew says the greatest gift Jackie gave him was sharing his faith in God, and living that faith out visibly in his commitment to him and his brother, David, and to his wife of 42 years, Annie.

Matthew deeply appreciates the fine example Jackie has set of what it takes to be a good man, husband and father. He hopes to follow in his footsteps as he parents his own young children, Jeremiah and Hannah, with his wife, Shahrzad.

“Being involved in your child’s life is so important,” Matthew comments. “Just being there, that’s what makes a great dad, and passing on wisdom you’ve gained. The call to being a dad is not to be perfect but to show you care by investing your time and love.

“I am thankful that my parents are godly parents,” Matthew continues. “When we were growing up, Dad often read the Bible to

my brother and me. He would act out the stories, like David fighting Goliath, and add fun details. One night when I was seven, he laid out God’s plan of salvation to me, and I accepted the Lord into my life that night. Ever since, I’ve continued to grow in understanding of God’s Word and grace.”

Faith in Play Matthew has been a Patriot for 11 years now and would love to walk in his father’s football footsteps by playing out his entire career with one team.

“I’m very humbled to be in my position here, and thankful for the opportunity,” he says. “I’ve been blessed to stay in one place, considering the nature of our business. I am very proud and thankful to have been with New England that long.

The Lord is the number 1, number 2, number 3 reason for it and I just try to hold up my end of the bargain. faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

COVER STORY

Photo: Courtesy of the New England Patriots/Jim Mahoney

Sure-Handed “I respect my opponents and I try to stay focused,” says Matthew, seen here catching a pass during a game

He preserves my health, and I work hard as a way to say thanks. It also helps to be surrounded by such great people.”

One of the few players remaining from when he first joined the team is Tom Brady, or “Thomas” to Matthew.

“I might be the only guy who calls him that!” Matthew laughs.

“Thomas and I often work out next to each other in the stretch line during practice. He always keeps things positive, and we have a great time. We consider ourselves two of the luckiest guys in the world.”

As an “old-timer” and Special Teams captain, Matthew makes sure to mentor some of the newcomers.

“I always tell the guys to control the things they can control,” he says. “That sounds simple but often they stress over everything else, things like if they’re going to get any playing time and how much. They should show up with a good attitude and work hard.

Lots of things in football and in life are beyond our control. That’s where faith comes into play.”

Raised to Serve Matthew’s favourite Bible verse is Romans 8:28: “And we know that in

all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”

“Unfortunately, a lot of people use that verse out of context,” he comments. “They think that God’s always going to work things out for them. What the verse really means is that God sometimes puts us in situations we might not be crazy about, but the ultimate goal is to make us like Him and show us who He is. I try to be thankful for adversity because it makes me depend on Him, and that’s good.”

Matthew also lives by Luke 12:48, which reminds us to whom much is given much is required. He is one of the team’s most active players in community service.

“It’s important to be aware of how blessed we are,” he says. “It’s also important to give back and build relationships, to plug in and connect with those less fortunate, and spread the love of the gospel. My wife feels the same desire to give back, and now that our kids are older and more aware of what’s going on, volunteering as a family allows us to spend time together learning valuable lessons.

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Faith&Friends

FEATURE

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Bedside Manner The author with Major Betty McCaughey

Major Betty FAITH HELPED HER BE AT PEACE WITH HER FATE IN LIFE.

by Dr. Ariel Lefkowitz

Photos: Courtesy of Gordon McCaughey

M

ajor Betty McCaughey was dying. She was admitted to hospital with drowsiness and fever, which could have resulted from an infection. When her blood grew Staphylococcus aureus, I knew she was in trouble. She had two prosthetic heart valves, fertile ground for S. aureus to stick and grow.

An infection of a prosthetic valve would be incurable without surgery, and open-heart surgery would be hard on any patient; for an 87-yearold woman with serious medical problems, such a surgery would be formidable.

My Dying Patient When my medical team met her, Major Betty was beaming at us from her hospital bed, her son and granddaughter by her bedside.

Although she was weak, her rosy cheeks and laugh lines made her look younger than her years. I explained what I knew.

“The problem is that Staph aureus is the stickiest bacteria of all and it’s stuck to your heart valves. Even with antibiotics, it’s hard to cure.”

Major Betty sighed.

“I am a Christian,” she said, a strong voice issuing from her frail faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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FEATURE

Major Betty’s faith gave her a deeper understanding of her fate than a medical education would. DR. ARIEL LEFKOWITZ frame. “I have been a Christian my entire life.”

I smiled with trepidation and looked down at my name badge. I looked around at my team members.

Ahmad. Orel. Hatim.

“As a major in The Salvation Army, my mother has devoted her life to serving the poor and neglected,” Major Betty’s son, Gordon, said. “She’s done a lot of work for folks with addictions, and even written a book about it.”

“I didn’t know there were majors in The Salvation Army!” I said.

“You don’t need to salute me or anything,” joked Major Betty, patting my hand.

“Betty,” I began again. “Here’s the hard part. With the bacteria stuck to your heart valve, you need surgery to replace it.”

“Oh, no,” she said. “I don’t want any more surgery.”

“Are you sure?” I asked. “Without it, there’s no way to cure the infection.”

“I don’t want surgery,” she repeated. “If the Lord deems it my time, then it’s my time.”

Her eyes shone. Her faith gave her 24 • JUNE 2019 I faithandfriends.ca

a deeper understanding of her fate than a medical education would— she understood the finality of the diagnosis and that it didn’t need to steal her vitality. But my awe at her conviction was tempered by my worry over her mortality. I hoped the antibiotics alone would be enough.

That night, I told my wife, Sarah, about my dying patient. I usually don’t tell her about my cases, but I couldn’t stop thinking about Major Betty’s grace in the face of death. I felt as if Sarah and I could learn from her patience and poise; we had been trying to get pregnant for almost six months and were starting to get frustrated.

“Ready to Go, Lord” The next day, I went to see how Major Betty was doing.

“Are you Jewish?” she asked.

“Yes,” I said, nervous about her motivation.

“Oh, that’s wonderful,” said Major Betty. Her granddaughter, Kimberley, and I smiled awkwardly at each other. “ ‘Ariel’ means ‘Lion of God’ in Hebrew,” I offered.

God’s Will Major Betty’s irrepressible faith was evident on her patient chart

“Great name!” Kimberley exclaimed.

Gordon nodded approvingly, too.

“What a nice face,” cooed Major Betty.

I blushed. “Betty, we should talk about your health.”

Her mouth narrowed.

“Yes, I wanted to talk about these medicines,” she said. “I don’t want them anymore.”

“The antibiotics? Are you sure?”

“My life is in the Lord’s hands.”

“But without the antibiotics, you’ll die.” My voice urged her to reconsider—I saw her certainty, but I

could barely believe it. I had to be sure she understood the consequences of her decision.

Major Betty nodded deliberately, then looked up at the ceiling.

“Ready to go, Lord, ready to stay, ready to serve Thy will. Ready for service, lowly or grand, ready my place to fill.”

My jaw dropped. Eyes wide, I nodded. I knew she understood, perhaps more than any other patient I had ever seen in her position. I looked at Gordon and Kimberley for confirmation. They raised their eyebrows and nodded, too. They knew Major Betty. faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

FEATURE

Smiling Warrior “My life is in the Lord’s hands,” said Major Betty

Channelling Calm We changed the focus of our care to relieving symptoms rather than treating her infection. I was glad we had discussed her wishes, because that afternoon, Major Betty became drowsy and delirious.

“She’s been sleepy from the Ativan, but she still talks about you,” Gordon told me the next morning.

I took Major Betty’s hand and smiled at her. “I’ve been thinking of you, too, Betty. My wife is tired of me quoting you. She says, ‘Stop say26 • JUNE 2019 I faithandfriends.ca

ing you’re ready to go, Lord, ready to stay! Just stay, OK?’ ” We all laughed.

“Did you see what we wrote on her board?”

I looked at the white board at the foot of Major Betty’s bed. Her physician was listed as “Ariel, Lion of God.” I could feel a lump rising in my throat.

Kimberley showed me some old pictures of Betty in her Salvation Army uniform.

Reprinted from CMAJ, March 2019

“These are amazing, Betty,” I said.

Her eyes were closed, as if she might not have heard. Then she opened them and looked right at me.

“You have … a nice … face.”

“You’re too much!” I scolded, laughing.

Gordon said, “Mom thought she was going to go yesterday, but she seems a bit brighter today. It’s really up and down.”

“It’s hard to predict when someone will die, even for us doctors,” I said.

“We don’t say ‘death,’ ” said Gordon. “In The Salvation Army, when someone dies, they are promoted to glory. They pass to their reward.”

“It’s no wonder Betty is so at peace,” I said.

That evening, Sarah and I were still agonizing over last month’s negative pregnancy test. I could feel the frustration and panic rising in both of us, but I tried to channel the calm of Major Betty.

“It’s OK” On my last day on the medicine service, Major Betty was looking very close to death. Her breathing came in gasps, with long, quiet pauses in between.

“Major Betty wanted you to have these,” Gordon said, handing me two books that she had written. “She dictated the inscriptions to you.”

I turned them over in my hands.

One was a book on addictions,

titled Living Life Alive. The other was about the founders of The Salvation Army. A gold chain hung between the pages, on which was inscribed the Serenity Prayer. I looked at it, then up at Gordon, with increasing alarm.

“That one has notes written in the margins,” said Gordon. “It’s Mom’s copy.”

“I can’t take this!” I exclaimed. “I can’t accept this.”

“You must! She wanted you to have it.”

Kimberley chimed in, “We each have our own copy. That one is yours now.”

“I’ve been … so moved by meeting you, Betty,” I said, my voice quavering. “You’re so inspiring, and ….”

Kimberley came over to me. “Let yourself go there. It’s OK.” Major Betty passed to her reward that evening. She was surrounded by loving family. She was at peace.

Sarah was at the door, her eyes shining, when I got home.

“We’re pregnant!”

I was speechless, grinning and shaking.

“It’s so early, probably just implanted,” said Sarah, glowing.

“I hope it sticks, I hope it’s the stickiest.”

Dr. Ariel Lefkowitz is a general internist at Sinai Health System and Sunnybrook Health Sciences Centre in Toronto. faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

LITE STUFF

Eating Healthy With Erin BRUSCHETTA AND FETA PITA TIME 20 min MAKES 4 servings SERVE WITH grilled chicken

250 ml (1 cup) diced tomatoes 45 ml (3 tbsp) shredded fresh basil 15 ml (1 tbsp) olive oil 2 ml (½ tsp) garlic powder 5 ml (1 tsp) oregano salt and pepper to taste 4 pitas 60 ml (¼ cup) feta balsamic glaze (optional)

1. Preheat oven to 190 C (375 F) and lightly grease a baking sheet.

2. In bowl, mix tomato, basil, olive oil, garlic powder, oregano, salt and pepper.

3. Arrange 4 pitas on baking sheet and spoon mixture on top.

4. Sprinkle feta and bake for 12-15 minutes or until slightly golden.

Rotate halfway through to prevent basil from overcooking.

5. Top with balsamic glaze (optional) or additional fresh basil.

SUMMER EDAMAME SALAD TIME 1 hr MAKES 5 servings SERVE WITH beef, chicken or veggie burgers

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1. Place frozen edamame in microwave bowl and heat, about 1 minute. Place in slightly oiled frying pan over medium heat and cook until outside is slightly crispy. Remove from heat and set aside in large bowl.

2. Add corn, red peppers, carrots and cherry tomatoes to bowl.

3. In small dish, whisk together olive oil, apple cider vinegar, lime juice, cilantro and red pepper flakes. Add salt and pepper to taste. Add to bowl and stir well.

4. Chill in fridge for 50 minutes.

5. Mix in avocado. Taste and add additional salt and pepper if needed.

Recipe photos: Erin Stanley/veganvirgin.ca

750 ml (3 cups) frozen shelled edamame beans 60 ml (¼ cup) canned corn 250 ml (1 cup) diced red peppers 60 ml (¼ cup) shredded carrots 60 ml (¼ cup) halved cherry tomatoes 60 ml (¼ cup) extra virgin olive oil 15 ml (1 tbsp) apple cider vinegar 45 ml (3 tbsp) fresh lime juice 30 ml (2 tbsp) diced cilantro 2 ml (½ tsp) red pepper flakes salt and pepper to taste 250 ml (1 cup) diced avocado

Moms & Music

TURN IT UP P.8

New J.R.R. Tolkien Movie

BEFORE THE HOBBIT P.13

Thrift Stores in Action

BREAKING BARRIERS P.26

Faith&Friends I N S P I R AT I O N F O R L I V I N G

faithandfriends.ca

MAY 2019

Full Circle

ONCE HOMELESS, TYLER WEATHERUP NOW WORKS AT THE SALVATION ARMY SHELTER THAT SAVED HIM FROM ADDICTION. P.16

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• inspiring true stories of hope and salvation • practical resources that will rejuvenate your spirit • uplifting articles that you can share with friends

Visit faithandfriends.ca/subscribe or call (416) 422-6119 today!

Sudoku Puzzle

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3 × 3 box contains the digits 1 through 9.

1 9

2

1. What is the colour of a “black box” in a commercial airplane?

2. “Borborygmus” is the scientific term for stomach rumbles, clouds or fungus?

3. What Norse god is considered the trickster?

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OH MY WORD! by John Sanko

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QUICK QUIZ

Answers on next page.

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“In biblical times, Dad’s roast beef would be considered a burnt offering!”

faithandfriends.ca I JUNE 2019

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Faith&Friends

LITE STUFF

Word Search Climb Every Mountain K A P Y O R Z T I F U J I E H L J Y I Y E N R O M S O R G S E L K I R K T U E A Z A N R U P A N N A N E I A U B I C J M Q B H V O Y L V I L P U P E Z O G R A N D T E T O N I P I M A N N N S C D O S J E S K M A U S A W N E C N R D R L P N T A L K E P J O E K A K A E P E H C N A L A V A E G V C G K V N T G N J C R L S E R T I I A U L I A H S A H Z R E K R R O L S M A K C T G R I L Z O F A E O R V N A A O D I O A T S R W U W S W N I D R P N X P N D N B E H J U T H G E O O M O N A S H E E I E K L S A A A P S E I K C O R R N N A R S X W T R J K L N E L B R U S A D I H S K D B N R O H R E T T A M R L K H T T C O L Y M P U S A I L E T N I A S G A ACONCAGUA ALVERSTONE ANNAPURNA AORAKI APPALACHIAN ARROWHEAD AVALANCHE PEAK BEN NEVIS DENALI EL CAPITAN ELBRUS EVEREST

FITZ ROY FUJI GRAND TETON GROS MORNE KASKAWULSH KAUMAJET KILIMANJARO KIRKJUFELL LAURENTIAN LICANCABUR MACKENZIE MATTERHORN

30 • JUNE 2019 I faithandfriends.ca

MONASHEE OGILVIE OLYMPUS POPOCATÉPETL RANIER ROCKIES SAINT ELIAS SELKIRK SPARROWHAWK THREE SISTERS TORNGAT WAPUTIK

Quick Quiz Answers: 1. orange; 2. stomach rumbles; 3. Loki.

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Faith&Friends

NIFTY THRIFTY

#1 Dad Craft the perfect gift for Father’s Day. Nothing shows Dad love like a homemade gift for Father’s Day. This restyled T-shirt is an easy DIY that’s fun for the whole family.

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Step 1 Drop by your local Salvation Army thrift store to find the perfect shirt. Choose a plain T-shirt in whatever colour you like.

Step 2 Wash the T-shirt and gather your supplies: chalk, permanent markers (e.g., Sharpies), fabric paint and a sponge brush.

Use the chalk to draw a design on the T-shirt, or skip this step and let your creative juices flow.

Step 3 Place the T-shirt on a flat surface.

Insert a piece of cardboard into the shirt to prevent the markers and paint from seeping through the fabric.

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Step 4 Add your design to the T-shirt using the markers and fabric paint. Use the sponge brush to add the paint or spread the paint with your fingers. Try using cookie cutters to create a pattern on the shirt or stamp the shirt with your children’s hands.

Step 5 Once you’re done, hang the T-shirt up to dry. After it dries, wrap it up and give it to Dad!

(left) Denise Corcoran (aka Thrifty By Design) is an author, upcycler, community builder and workshop facilitator based in North Vancouver. She shares her enthusiasm for crafting and upcycling by facilitating “Crafternoons” throughout Vancouver. She is also a creative expert for The Salvation Army’s thrift stores.

Find a thrift store near you at thriftstore.ca.

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