Issuu

THE

MEDIUM The Entertainment Weekly Of Dipping Your Balls In It.

Volume XXXV, Number 7

www.themedium.net

Wednesday, October 22nd 2003

In This Week’s Medium... A Guide To FSU* f’ing shit up

Sexscapades Part 2! My Life With Medium Monkey The Sexy Conclusion

The Hulkster

The Personals!

What’s Shakin’

The Contest of the Year! The Sleep with The Medium Essay Contest

In one hundred words or less, tell us why you want to sleep with us. Please e-mail your submissions to eic@themedium.net or mail them to: SAC Box 78, New Brunwsick, NJ 08901.

“I look like walking death and smell like Icy Hot”

Opinions Opinions

The Liberals Hold Us Back

The Medium Presents: The Sleep with The Medium Contest/Concept by: Michael Stanley Editor-in-Chief

Wednesday October 22nd, 2003

An Opinion by Vinny G. This is where you’ll be if you win!

(I’d like to stress the fact that all opinions are welcome here, even the right wing - and I’d like to stress even more [as a feminist and minority] that I welcome rebuttals from all ends to this article) - Opinions Editor

You know, a lot of people think that once you achieve fame through a newspaper, it’s really easy to get laid. Well, nothing could be further from It is because of the left that this country is such a bad shape. Republicans and right-wing Democrats are the only reason this country has gotten the truth. Which is why we’ve come up with a great new idea. It’s the anywhere. George W. Bush has brought integrity and heart to the United Sleep With The Medium Essay Contest. States. It is because of great Republicans like him, America is one of the most loved and respected countries in the world. If it weren’t for the Well, actually, the fat-asses in the legal department won’t let me call it a conservatives, we would still be in segregation...heck, we would still be in contest, so we’re calling it a concept. The Sleep With The Medium slavery. The right fought hard to ensure African Americans got equal Essay Concept. It’s easy. You write to us, you tell using 100 words or less why you want to sleep with any of us. We don’t care what you look rights and were treated better. What the heck has liberals ever done for this country? All they do is promote their unrealistic world peace like, We don’t care if you’re a boy or a girl, some on staff won’t even propaganda and send the hard working conservatives into useless wars. care if you’re conscious. Chances are, they won’t be conscious either. Vietnam, Gulf War, that’s all left-wing propaganda. They don’t care about The only rule is you have to be alive, and well... someone might be the environment and they certainly don’t give a damn about equality. flexible on that. They are going around promoting gay rights, when everyone knows that they don’t deserve rights. Are they humans? I think not. I am sick of the Here’s a sample entry, “Dear The Medium, I want to sleep with you.” left and their propaganda. Like that guy who writes those columns in the Great, you win. Here’s another one that’s just a phone number. Terrific. Targum whining about professors expressing their left-wing propgandic Less work for me, what do you like for breakfast? views. I’m all with that. Professors have no right expressing their view You don’t have to be creative. Hey, you don’t even have to write it, have point. I mean they certainly have not deserved the respect to express their view point, one or two pHd’s does not matter, they don’t know your friend write it. Is your friend cute? It doesn’t matter, because what they’re talking about. I do! We conservatives are the minority, and you’re beautiful and nobody understand you the way I do. The Sleep With The Medium Essay Concept, because some people on staff aren’t I’m sick of it. We have fought for years of equality. Bush, Arnold, Limbaugh, these men stand for integrity and morals. getting any better looking. Please e-mail us at eic@themedium.net! A Fucking Woman’s Touch

These are a few of my favorite quotes from America’s greatest Right Wing leaders:

by Lauren Maloney Left Handed Toilets Ever notice how the toilet handle is on the left side of the bowl? What the fuck?! Was the inventor of the flushing mechanism left-handed or some shit? Didn’t he realize that majority of people are not fucking left-handed. Why should I have to reach over, across the shit filled bowl with my right hand to flush? Personally I strongly feel that all toilet engineers need to rethink this matter and take into consideration the idea of making all future models with the flusher on the RIGHT side of the bowl. Till then, I’m boycotting the system!

Guy Sized Shits I’ve recently come to the realization that guys shit A LOT. I mean, I never really quantified the sheer abundance of shit guys are filled with, but I know it’s a whole lot more than any girl. Some guys can produce two good, bowl topping sized shits a day! As a female, I ask you, HOW THE FUCK IS THAT POSSIBLE? I know girls that can’t pinch out more than one loaf in the span of 3 days! Maybe that’s why girls just have more body fat, because they don’t shit as much as guys. That would account for the fact that women tend to have a higher percentage of body fat: they just store it up and let it spread throughout their bodies, forming this layer of shit all over, eventually being built on with time. So, ladies, just remember, every grease truck sub you eat and don’t shit out within a day is just cultivating under that perfectly primped skin of yours. Now there’s food for thought. (I dunno, me and my friends can’t seem to stop shitting...I guess it’s because of the endless cycle of beer and cheeseburgers...to each her own, I guess. - Ops/Ed)

Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8

Ruck Maul Scrum Lineout High Tackle Conversion Try

Page 9 Page 10 Page 11 Page 12

Blood Time Boot Check Sin Bin What’s Shakin

Cover by: Michael “The State” Stanley

“It appears that America’s anti-Biblical feminist movement is at last dying, thank God, and is possibly being replaced by a Christ-centered men’s movement” -Rev. Jerry Falwell “Democracy used to be a good thing, but now it has gotten into the wrong hands.” -U.S. Senator Jesse Helms (Republican-North Carolina) “...I believe that feminists of the more aggressive persuasion are frustrated women unable to find the proper male leadership. If a woman were receiving that right kind of love and attention and leadership, she would not want to be liberated from that.” -Tony Evans

These are the great leaders of America. This is why this country is great, not because of a bunch of liberals who don’t care about equality and American morals. Rush Limbaugh, George W. Bush, stand up and lead this country strong, we need you.

MEDIUM

CONTENTS

“Arrogantly demanding their rights, activist gays and lesbians have become a militant voice in American politics, influencing elections and affecting the policies of high government leaders. Their public demonstrations and political lobbying have fooled many in our country into believing that they deserve special status. -Bill Bright

Editor-in-Chief Managing Editor Business Manager Opinions Editor News Editor GMG Editor Arts Editor Faculty Advisor

Michael Stanley James Cortina Ned Berke Aija McKenzie Jim Cortina Dan Migliore Paul Simpson Jeff Buechner

Personals Editors Michael Stanley Steve Toboz Photographer Steve Toboz What’s Shakin’ Editor Larry Cheng Online Editor Chris Holt Advertising Manager Ned Berke Staff Artist Pat McRoch Senior Editor Aija McKenzie

THE MEDIUM is the entertainment weekly of Rutgers University. All articles are the opinions of The authors and are not necessarily shared by THE MEDIUM. Submission and business deadline is noon, Sunday. The office of THE MEDIUM is located in the SAC - Cubicle N. All correspondence may be addressed to THE MEDIUM SAC Box 78, New Brunswick, N.J. 08903. This issue is dedicated to Rutgers Womens’ Rugby for fucking shit up - whatever, I’ll shout out who I want!!!

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003

“Time to take your squirrel.....to the bagel shop”

Editorials

Fucking Shit Up: A Girls’ Guide by Aija McKenzie, Opinions Editor(ess) Oral Sex 101 I’ll say it’s 101, because this probably will not be the first time I’m mentioning it in my section. I have many opinions on said subject. I’m gonna be explicit, because I have to. We live explicit lives. I’m aiming this mostly at the young girls, because you ladies are so impressionable, and I’d like to get to you before some skeeve with salty balls tries to get you to do some ill shit. We’ll start out with the facts. It’s a given that oral sex is nice, and can be a great way to uh, express your feelings to your partner. However, we come across some roadblocks in our college bubble, because there are so many arguments about said topic. Argument #1: It’s nasty. Alright, if you are disgusted by fellatio, maybe you should think about why you feel that way. Is it because somebody surprised you with a stinky pee-pee? I suggest that you always check out the equipment before you start your project. That goes for sex as well. The less surprised you are at his junk when it’s time to do the deed, the better. If you think it’s disgusting just because of what it is, I’d like you to think about cunnilingus. Not exactly #1 on your list of things you’d love to do, right? So why do men bother to do it? Because it’s fantastic, that’s why. And you not returning the favor (assuming the equipment is OK), well, it’s a little unfair. Argument #2: I feel dirty/violated/slutty. You can attribute that feeling to society. The word “cocksucker” is such a strong insult - you wouldn’t want to be caught doing a thing like that, would you? And pornography, when the guy says “Suck it, bitch,” doesn’t make a girl feel special, huh? Here’s a situation of which you have to take control. First of all, and I cannot stress this enough, when you’re messing around with a new guy, DO NOT PERFORM ORAL SEX ON HIM UNTIL HE DOES IT TO YOU FIRST. That’s just the way things have to work. For a number of reasons, mainly so that you don’t catch the fucking playout. I’m just looking out for you, ladies. Guys, don’t get all bitchy about it - too many girls have had their spots blown up for performing oral sex, now we need a little insurance. Example: Big Jerk: Yeah, there goes Hot Chick, I hooked up with her last week. Jerk Friend: Yeah? I heard she was easy. BJ: Yeah, she was all sucking my dick and shit. JF: nice! Hot Chick: Whatever, bitch. Let me remind you that it was only to repay me for doing such a good job when you had your FACE IN MY TWAT, you fucking asshole. Now you’ll never get it again, and your bitch-ass friend never had a chance. Fuck you jerks, I’m out. See? Argument #3: For my lovely lesbian ladies: It smells funny/she needs to shave. I’m not gay. One of the reasons why I’m not gay is because I have my own boobies and vag, and I’ve got no use for some other girl’s junk in my face. But that’s just me. If you happen to play for the other team, do your thing, girl. A big part of lesbianism is weedge-licking, so I’ll extrapolate some of the tips I’ve heard about oral sex on girls. Much like you’d do if you were messing around with a guy, always check the equipment so you don’t get caught out there. Usually, too much hair can lead to too much odor, so that might be your first red flag. If you need to look a little closer, it’s recommended that you check with your hand - be real slick about it. Move your hand around there, then I dunno, scratch your nose or something. Then you’ll know whether or not to retreat. Another idea is to do it, but be real half-assed about it, and just bear it until it’s your turn. This is my second week doing this girls’ guide, and I think I’ll stick to it. Consider me Queen Latifah from Chicago - I’ll be Mama. This is my 4th year in this vacuum we call Rutgers, and I’ve accumulated a bit of wisdom that I wanna share.

Rutgers Womens’ Rugby: you bitches can’t hold us down...

Bored? Come to a Medium Meeting, tonight at 9:30, Beck 003. Submit all your illustrious opinions and editorials to opinions@themedium.net. Wanna see what the Opinions Editor looks like in action? You can catch me fucking shit up live on Saturday, 10/ 25 at the MetNY Collegiate Womens’ Rugby Playoffs on Busch field. Come see why Rutgers Womens Rugby is the number one seed. And a small opinion to justify my utterly shameless plug: in the interest of fucking shit up, girls should play a nice contact sport like rugby to vent your frustration, get you in shape, make lifelong friends, and boost your self-esteem.

NEWS NEWS

“What did I learn last week? See opposite header for the answer! ”

Pirates in Passion Puddle By: Phil Donahue Cook College- Although Passion puddle adds beauty to Cook College’s sylvan landscape, some students feel threatened by the new inhabitants in the lake. The terrorization by what Rutgers security is now calling “The Passion Pirates” started at 10 am yesterday. Evidently, there is a group of older, bearded men with striped shirts terrorizing students from a rowboat in Passion Puddle. “This guy just rowed up, threw an anchor out of his boat and put a knife to my throat. He kept asking me if I saw his treasure. I said “no” and then he just took my books and ran off. I think he called me a land lover or something like that, but they’re in a fucking lake. I could swim out and get them. It’s ridiculous they just sit there with this telescope and repeatedly yell “Land ahoy!” how hard is it to arrest them and throw them into a mental institute?” commented Paul Jackson, a junior at Cook College. A BFA student was assaulted later in the day. “This old man got out of the boat and asked me if I had seen some stash he had. I think it was of aluminum cans or something like that. He was saving them .He said they were worth like 50 dollars and he asked me if I had the map to them. So, I told him how I’m an actor and I don’t have time for that stuff, what with watching Saved by the Bell reruns and massages. I mean the acting program is rough. So, when I told him this he smacked me in the face and called me a fag. I hate that word! Everyone called me that in high school, but I’ll show them. One day I’ll be fabulous. One day I’ll be a star!!!” After bitch-slapping the fag, the pirates went onto to steal other students books and taunt them. “They kept saying ‘the treasure is all ours the treasure is all ours,’ after stealing our books. It was like you couldn’t even walk past them without being pissed off,” said an RU student. Although the disruptive activities of the pirates have caused a lot of discomfort RU security are having trouble catching them. “Well, we have tried to lure them out of the lake, but they just call us scallywags. We can’t go in and get them since we aren’t equipped with rowboats and it’s too cold to swim out there,” said Rutgers chief of security, Paul Rueben. Phil Donahue is on Staff Payroll solely because he has incriminating pictures of our Editor In Chief’s miniscule penis, and threatens to show the public unless we pay. (not true, c’mon it’s the Medium - EIC)

Wednesday October 22nd, 2003

Study Finds: 75% of Newspaper Content Written While High By: Tie Adeline Des Moines - A study by the Des Moines Press Review Association has found that as many as 75% of all US news content is written while under the influence of narcotics, most frequently and notably, marijuana. (Just like the New York Times – ed) Surprisingly the New York Times rated the highest in the country in percentage of High News with 87%. (Oh, that kinda kills my joke. Whoops! – ed) These figures are startling for the Heads of many major news organizations, but not, apparently, for their writers. “Do you actually read some of this shit my coworkers spit out, if they’re not high, then I’ll never win the Pulitzer Prize,” said Kevin Morrone, staff writer for The Daily Targum. The studies used such advanced scientific techniques as the Beard Ratio, which, by using subliminal clues, can tell how many Ho-Hos the writer had eaten in the hour prior to writing the article. “You have to be high to eat that shit,” said a random homeless person. Also the Birnbaum Maneuver can be used. As no one actually knows what this is, researchers usually stick to the Beard Ratio. These accusations are sobering when you consider that there are probably another three articles on the same page as this one, which, in essence, means that 3 out of these four articles were written – Ho-Hos – while high. Can you, the reader, spot them? Fill out your answers on a 3.15 X 9.72 post card, and mail them to: The Medium Sac Box 78 New Brunswick, NJ 08903

Montecore the Tiger to get Blood Test By: Troy Crowder LAS VEGAS - Following a protest from the tiger and numerous animals’ rights groups, Montecore, the Siberian white tiger who recently attacked and nearly killed performer Roy Horn, will be getting a blood test. “He has, through specially trained translators, said that he wants to be sure he didn’t get any diseases when he sunk his teeth into Roy’s delicious neck,” said Mirage Hotel and Casino spokesman Jamaal Wilkes. “I believe his words were: ‘Shit! Did I get AIDS from that flaming assbandit?!’” Montecore attacked Horn, half of the famous performing duo “Siegfried and Roy,” during a stage show on October 3. Horn has been hospitalized ever since. However, many insist that it is the tiger’s health that is at risk. “Everyone knows that Siegfried and Roy are both four-alarm fires who can’t stay away from the local bathhouses,” said Las Vegas PETA spokesman Chip Carey. “Montecore wasn’t trying to get AIDS, he was trying to rescue Roy from that bitch with the big hair in the first row.” In related news, officials announced that the tiger would be retired and never again appear on stage.

I’d offer you proof that you should send me news articles, but I really have none. If you’re the type who likes to do things for no logical reason, then send news to: news@themedium.net and make it snappy.

“Well, there’s a slight problem with keeping Montecore on stage,” said Wilkes. “You see, now that he’s tasted the flesh of a flaming homosexual, he might go after Siegfried or one of the hundreds of other butt-pirates who live and work in Las Vegas, where you can drink and gamble all night long. So, we’ll keep him in the display area.” Montecore could not be reached for comment. Troy Crowder is a graduate of the Dicklick Shitballs Academy for Girls, where he received a 4. - ass - 0 GPA and graduated Summa Cum cock whore Laude.

Wednesday October 22nd, 2003

“Domestic violence is funny, frat guys beating each other, however, is not.”

NEWS

Jesus Dying... Again! By: Annan A. Mousse New Brunswick - Two young boys were spotted playing a game of two-hand-touch football with Jesus yesterday afternoon. Ted and Billy, aged 8 and 9, claimed they were walking through a field on Busch Campus when Jesus allegedly appeared. He held two helmets and a football and asked the boys their religious affiliations. When asked how the boys replied, Ted said, “Well, we’re both Jews, but we didn’t want to piss him off, so we told him we’re Christian.” A game of football ensued. A press release by Jesus earlier today, revealed that both boys will die in a violent car accident next week and be sent to hell for lying.

Throughout the game, Billy accused Jesus of using his powers to cheat. “On this one play, Ted threw Jesus a screen pass, and before I knew it, he levitated over my head and right to the end zone. Who does he think he is? Sure, he’s ‘the son of God’, but I don’t really believe that anyway, why else would I be a Jew.” The game turned ugly when Billy got tired of Jesus’ cheating, and during a handoff, Billy tackled him (see picture). Some experts think Billy was in fact reaching for the Holy Package. Jesus, being the drama queen he is, flew backwards several feet, accidentally impaling himself on a big, rusty, metal spike sticking out of the ground. A bystander dialed 911, and EMTs arrived on the scene within minutes. Jesus was rushed to the Robert Wood Hospital in downtown New Brunswick where he remains in critical condition. Doctors there told The Medium it looks as though he will surely die. Good job Billy. At least you’re being consistent with your roots. Annan A. Mousse is the author of several public domain works, such as those seen on cheap greeting cards, bulk emails, and in those annoying Chicken Soup for the Porn Fluffer’s Soul books.

Police Blotter -

700 Black people were arrested, asked if they thought that Racial Profiling really existed, and then let go again.

John M. Viedershekz was arrested for lewd conduct after he knocked on a New Brunswick family’s house, defecated on their carpet, and proceeded to steal their poodle.

That girl from Douglass who looks like Natalie Portman was arrested and charged with “Being Hot and Not Having Sex With Me.” If it’s not already a crime, then it should be.

If you are Asian, someone in your family makes six figures, and you live in the suburbs, the New Brunswick Police would like to let you know that it is still technically a crime to wear FUBU, or act like you are black whatsoever

A man from Edison was arrested when it was found that he had secretly been impersonating Richard McCormick for the past six months, and was, in fact, the man who was actually driving drunk that fateful night last month. Our bad.

www.themedium.net

I looked up “poo lips” on altavista.com’s image search, and this was the only picture that was returned. If your idea of a good time is to spend time with someone whose idea of a good time is to look up “poo lips” on altavista.com’s image search, then come to a Medium Meeting. We need all the friends we can get. Of course by friends, I mean, “hot chicks who feel sorry for lonely nerdy guys and like to sleep with them.” So if you still want to come to a meeting, then show up tonight in Beck Hall room 003. It’s in the basement. It’s at 9:30. We’ll have Ho-Hos. Oh and for the most compelling argument I’ve ever seen against drug usage, go to: http://www.rathergood.com/vid Other than that, have a good week folks. And keep those hedges trimmed.

GMG

“I must be a pool player, the way I’m always talking about 8 balls.”

Wednesday,October 22nd, 2003

A Guide to Nearby Casinos by The Ramblin’ Gamblin’ Man You looking to make some money without working and don’t have an Italian relative to get you a job as a contractor? Do you want to throw your money away without bribing one of your TAs? Are you fat and want to fall face-down into a buffet besides Brower’s once in a while. Well, you’ll be thrilled to know you can do so at one of the many casinos less than a day away from here. I’ve tried a bunch of ‘em and thought I’d put my homework aside to share my findings with you losers, so read on! Atlantic City This will probably be the first choice for you, seeing as how it’s the closest to No Funswick (a mere 100 miles down the Garden State Parkway). I’ve been to AC twice, and if I ever go back it won’t be to gamble but to feel better about myself. You see, when you go to AC and see the losers there and the slums just a stone’s throw from the ocean you can’t help but feel better about yourself. It’s similar to why I go to WalMart sometimes: as soon as I walk in I see some busted-up tard who greets me and I immediately say, “Whoa, I guess I’m not THAT fucked by life after all!” The AC Casinos contain some of the ugliest people in the world. Not just the old people in slippers and robes (not uncommon to see in Vegas), I’m talking about old women without hair in track suits. Lots of them. Last time I was there we stopped counting after 10 or so. It raises the question of whether it’s the casino that makes these old people look ugly or rather ugly people gravitate to these casinos. If you’re into peoplewatching more than gambling, this is a good place for you. If you want to gamble, it’s not so bad, but the casinos are all a little dated and tacky. (And yes, I did see Saturday Night Live’s Weekend Update this past weekend, with their joke about “Like Vegas, but uglier,” but ask my friends and they’ll say I’ve discussed this many times).

Medium Meeting! Tonight! Beck 003. 9:30. Be there, or I’ll cut you. Sexscapades, Part Two: Girls Gone Wild By Imogene When we last left the lovely Imogene, she was dancing atop a table to Britney Spears Oops, I Did It Again. Let’s see where her latest sexcapade takes her... I’m on top of the table surrounded by the trucker and their ten biker buddies who have sauntered their way in to see the show. Amanda’s on the bar, giving it all to the late night bartender and his off duty rent-acop, a few Guatemalan cleaning guys, and even the concierge. Christy and Jackie are standing off to the side, arms crossed, living up to the lie that Amanda and I were ex-strippers, and the two of them were our bodyguards-stupid I know, but these guys just ate it up. I can’t tell you how exciting it was to look down between my spread open legs, to see a guy’s head on the table, staring up at my crotch, with a ten-dollar bill in his teeth. We closed the bar at 3am-they stayed open an extra hour to accommodate our lewd activities-and made our way back to our room, myself having $70 in my pocket. (Amanda and I hooked up for a good ten minutes and were paid a whole twenty for our troubles and an old salt and pepper head had such sympathy for me trying to pay my way through law school-please-that he gave me some of his own pocket change-a fifty to be exact.) Not even fifteen minutes in our room,

with Amanda and I high on a roomful of guys drooling all over themselves, the phone rings. Christy answers it and then tells us with a snicker that two guys saw the show in the bar and are willing to pay Amanda and I $100 for some “private” dancing. I laugh and, as a joke, tell Christy that we don’t do anything for less than $500. I hear her repeat my words into the phone and there’s a pause before Christy’s eyes get wide and she gives us the thumbs up. Now here’s where I turn normal, mature Imogene. What do I do? It was one thing to be having a good time and someone offering you money for what you already did. It’s another thing to take payment for services about to be rendered. Then I start to think about how long I’d have to work at my parttime job to make that kind of money. And then it just all dwindles down to what I could spend my half of the dough on. Now, I don’t have the time or the space to tell you all the details of what happened next, but I will say this, two weeks later I was working out to my new MP3 Player and chatting it up on the latest Motorola flip phone model. So a special thanks goes out to my trucker boys who would’ve paid a small fortune for our company, had we asked for it. Thanks for making us feel like we were worth it.

Aries

March 21-April 19

Prove you’re a genius, quitting dope & de-romanticizing drinking. Billiard balls roll even if your head is not spinning. The worse could have happened. Pray you don’t have a darling in Goteborg. Not all she-warriors die ‘neath a twelve-foot tree with arrows and bow & a rusty dagger. Prove you’re a genius. Lay back worriless while your mate is bewildered with deep breaths, barrowed from your loins.

Taurus

April 20-May 20

Split the electric bill in four. Fix your fogged up glasses, put a new bungee cord on your under-trousers. Invasion of your underbed is deferred ‘till next June & ‘till then you can have enough saved up to buy Mauritanian slaves if you wish or male & female mistresses from the north of all brunette countries. Make it easy for you housemate to visit your room - would it matter what you’re wearing as long as your skin is on?

Gemini

May 21-June 20

“I suspect Rimbaud’s mother cut his hair for him” declared the host and added before passing the bottle over, “And Bunuel sat long hours in the dim basement of Café des Artists, where long hours he evoked the black wool stockings of catholic sisters who happily escaped the saints’ sight and made love to eels and spiders with their ears pressed up against their mothers silent rooms.” Your assessment is absolutely accurate - there is way too much sheepshit in the structure of your current friendships & you wouldn’t shed a drop if your ship sunk with all her passengers.

Cancer

June 21-July 22

Step out of your kitchen. Change the greeting on your answering machine. Galleria d’Uffizi’s corridors are perfumed with single young mother’ milk fragrance, their lovers never returned from nameless battles & Boticelli’s angles will hold you by the hand - dance with them dance. Your intestines have enough strength to grind fear & even mix it with snake venom.

Leo

July 23- Aug. 22

So Poldy the Royal walked deep in the dark forest bare feet & bare chest, with two buckets - willed with red hair cats’ piss - hung on his shoulders, thinking of the constructions he had built & the people he had fed & the girls he so skillfully put down. But now he wished to reach the snowy top. If only he could remember what the gray owl had wooed at him & considering that it might had been wise to partner up with the boy who had metal wings on his heels.

Virgo

Aug. 23-Sept. 22

“So, what did Tom Joad say to his mom?” asked the instructor. A skinny girl by the window side raised her hand. She got up & turned around herself several times while everyone else fixed up pairs of sunglasses upon their aimless grins. “You see,” said the skinny girl, “I can whirl ceaseless, like a fricking Mevlevi dervish under the sun, yet one of my sides would always remain in the dark & that’s where I’m apt to concoct witchy remedies for the needy. Then Tom Joad disappeared into the night - his mother squeezed her breasts & rubbed a freshly picked ripe peach on the lips of her uterus. Years later Tom Joad popped up in Bolivia, where he got gunned down by the government forces and the accompanying squad of Californian born CIA officers.

The Medium’s Drinking Game Of the Week: 7’s, 11’s and Doubles By: Beerman This is fast paced game with lots of alcohol involved. One person rolls the dice, and if that person rolls a 7-11-or doubles then he picks someone to drink. The roller then fills a glass with as much beer as he wants and puts it within reach of the drinker. The drinker CANNOT touch the glass until he’s ready to drink. The object of the game is to chug that glass before the person rolling the dice rolls another 7-11-double. The person rolling the dice CANNOT touch the dice until their person touches the glass with his hand. (Therefore you can fake the roller out and make him drink) If the person does not finish the glass before the person rolls a 7-11-doubles then the process is repeated again until he beats the roller. If he beats the roller the dice are then passed to the next person and the game starts over again. Remember that you must roll a 7-11-double to pick someone to drink. Sloppy dice (going off the table) makes the roller drink a full glass. THIS GAME WILL MAKE YOU DRUNK. A fun addition is to add “steals”, meaning that any person can pick up the glass and start drinking. This often helps when someone has been drinking a few too many times in a row.

Submit fun things to Features@themedium.net. My mailbox is more empty then my wallet.

Libra

Sept. 23- Oct. 22 Mr. Justice walked in, dust rising from his back from the back pats & dollar bills over boarding from his pockets rims. He took off his hat. Various business cards were visible, edged up against the inside fabric. “I may be corrupt” he said, “but I’m still blind & I can still chop the hand that attempts to bribe me if I happened to swing a sword.” Mot many believed in what he so convincedly declared, though & the arms sell grew ever more & gods’ words were encrypted at the entrances of arsenals & huge worship houses were appearing right behind them.

Scorpio

Oct. 23- Nov. 21

“Dear Sister Fate,” wrote one of Hades off springs, holding tightly an eagle’s beak, “I humbly would like to beg of you to throw me into a cold creek next time you make a nymph walk by me wearing shorts on which states, ‘Juicy’ demonstratively. I find it rather cruel to have to stand there dryly while one of your plump creatures spring by me with succulent secretions. My suggestion: either take away my sense of sensation or be generous with what stirs my senses. Sincerely yours, Mr. Long Limbson”

Sagittarius

Nov. 22-Dec. 21

So, you sadly try enjoying your solitude for people seem to have drifted away from machines like you. “Will wearing a shark’s teeth make difference?” you’ll wonder “or diving deep down?” and exaggerating the experience a thousand times when you get back to the town. You could have found affirmative response had your friends wished you well. Sometimes we enjoy seeing a friend suffer & quiver in low downs. No need to confess about it. It’s taken for granted.

Capricorn

Dec. 22-Jan. 19

Sailor held on to the rope tightly. Were th e every highly rising waves of a brief tempest or an angry god’s spits, as his grandma had told him? What was the captain’s grandma’s take on this? Then, with a splash of salty sea water, the sailor decided that he’d workd hard to please Neptune & once at the port safely he’d write home informing, “Folks, I won’t be coming back. Kids’, you can come live on my boat. Leave your mom and mama at home. Tell Uncle Derek that grandpa’s not buried where we used to visit with flowers. He had always wished to be a baby whale, so I returned him to the seas before my last trip. Faithfully yours, your unworthy sea-sullen Jakob.”

Aquarius

Jan. 20-Feb 18

We would surely imitate your acts if only you were at tiny bit more animated. Why be so bashful? Uranus is soon to come closer & be sighted. For especially those whose moon extendedly shins upon a pride of lions and lionesses, what use is to give a flying fart to whatever other earthlinks think of you, if it’s thinking at all that they do?

Pisces

Feb. 19-March 20

A ram sees a trout in the water and says to her, “Come swim along where I trot you’ll feel like a swordfish whose image is caught on silver screens - an elegant heroine, whose father dies of heart attack from excessive joy and pride in her. The trout, however, she is still hesitant & starts saying, “but what about…” but the ram was long vanished with a whiff of frustration and the twin boys on him to avoid dying of boredom.

Oh that wacky Dubya! You know he’d be at a Medium Meeting tonight, if he weren’t so busy continuing his war crimes and rape of innocent people. But you can come to Beck 003 at 9:30 for a good time!

Features

“If you can read this, you are not illiterate.”

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003

...I hope the ambitious realize that they are more likely to succeed with success as opposed to failure.” -Interview with the Associated Press, Jan. 18, 2001

Arts

“You won’t get away with this, cracker!”

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003

1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 More Music Reviews, by the Volcano Worshipper 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 King Geedorah: Take Me To Your Leader (Big Dada/Ninja Tune) 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 This is one of the many albums this year that 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 underground hip-hop legend MF Doom is 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 involved with. This album’s been out for 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 months, but I only just heard it recently. I was 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 blown away on first listen. Basically, this is the 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 kind of abstract apocalyptic sci-fi hip-hop that 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 there’s probably tons of out there that I don’t 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 have enough time to search around for that I 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 enjoy the most. This album’s sound is typical of 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 MF Doom’s: There’s tons of humorous samples 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 taken from B-movies and old cartoons, musical 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 backdrops lifted wholesale from dusty old jazz 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 and soul records, inventive beat patterns, fast 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 complex rhyming, and other ear pleasing 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 sounds. I also appreciate the lyrics, which manage to be thought-provoking without 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 being clichéd or over-preachy. Most of the vocals on this album aren’t even by MF 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Doom himself, and while the other MC’s aren’t as well known, they’re mostly just as 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 excellent. Some of the tracks on this album don’t even feature vocals, and let the 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 turntables and impressive collages of samples do the talking. 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 Of MF Doom’s other recent projects, an album called Vaudeville Villain under the 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 name Viktor Vaughn has been getting much underground praise as well. I downloaded 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 that and need to give it a better listen, but I don’t think I like it as much as the King 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Geedorah album, because most of the production is done by artists other than MF 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Doom (who concentrates more on vocals this time around), and it’s just not as out123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 there as Take Me To Your Leader. However, I have heard some of the demos that have 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 leaked for the upcoming Madvillain project (a collaboration between MF Doom and 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 Madlib, whose 2000 album The Unseen under the alias Quasimoto is one of my favorite 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 hip hop albums ever), and this promises to be unspeakably brilliant. For now, though, 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 the King Geedorah album is the best hip-hop album I’ve heard all year, and I highly 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 recommend it. 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Themselves: The No Music Remixed (Anticon) 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Speaking of highly recommended 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 underground hip hop… Themselves is yet 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 another permutation of various members of 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 the Anticon collective, who are gradually 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 becoming one of my favorite labels. This 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 album, a remix album of last year’s The No 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Music album by Themselves (aka Jel and 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 Dose One), is considerably more hip-hop 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 sounding than some of Anticon’s releases 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 this year (particularly those by Dosh and 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 Why?), but, as always, it’s never accurate to 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 define anything on this album as strictly hip123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 hop. There’s certainly more electronic 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 elements on this album as well: Hrvatski 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 turns in a mindblowing remix of “Good People Check” featuring what sounds like harps 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 and xylophones and his usual fucked up breakbeats; Hood (whose last album featured 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890 1234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 cameo vocals by Dose One) contributes a very noisy, cut-up, confusing, wonderful 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012

Underrated Artist Appreciation By the Volcano Worshipper

arts@themedium.net pleasssssssse sssssend me sssssstuff

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i need articlessssssssss bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Many people know Hulk Hogan as a world-famous wrestler, body builder, Make A Wish Foundation spokesperson, movie star of such timeless classics as Suburban Commando and Santa With Muscles, and even politician. But did you know that in addition to all of these accomplishments, Hulk Hogan is also a professional musician? Before becoming famous as a wrestler, he originally played bass guitar. He put his musical talents to use on his 1995 recording debut, Hulk Rules, recorded with his rock group, The Wrestling Boot Band (consisting of Hulk, his manager and his girlfriend). This is one of the most underrated albums in the history of recorded sound. Why on earth would it take over ten years after this album would’ve been anything close to popular? Well, because frankly, people, a masterpiece this brilliant could not have just been whipped up on the spot and released to cash in on a trend. This was a complex, groundbreaking opus that took years and years to create, and the Hulkster released it only when he was completely happy with the end results. And what end results they are! The album hopscotches between a multitude of musical styles, including country, metal, hip hop, house, and many others. The album spawned a near hit single in the stultifyingly brilliant “I Want To Be A Hulkamaniac”, the Hulkster’s catchy, danceable rap ode to doing such simple things as always eating your vitamins and remembering to go swimming with a buddy in order to succeed in life. However, even that song pales in comparison to the unquestionable highlight of the album, the second to last track: “Hulkster In Heaven”. This song was dedicated to a Make A Wish Foundation child that Hulk Hogan was friends with, who tragically passed away. It is an absolutely heart-rendering, achingly beautiful ballad featuring cascades of lush keyboards and soulful backing vocals by, yes, a gospel choir. It is the funniest goddamned song ever created. Seriously, this song obliterates the need for any intentionally funny music. It makes the entire genre of comedy completely redundant. You’ll laugh till you cry till you laugh till you pass out till you wake up and remember why you passed out and then you’ll start laughing again. Quite simply, you need to hear this. The album may unfortunately be out of print today, but you can easily find it on eBay, or you can download the entire album at http://www.hulkhoganhq.com/wbb.html. To read more information about this album, you can check out http://www.themedium.net and read the feature about this album. Once you hear this absolute marvel of creation, you will undoubtedly agree that the Wrestling Boot Band is the most underrated musical ensemble of all time.

You’ll get crabs too if you don’t send me any articles. Submit arts related stuff (reviews, articles, poetry, etc.) to arts@themedium.net. Also, come to the Medium meeting tonight at 9:30 PM in Beck 003 (in the basement) at Livingston. And be sure to listen to the Volcano Worshipper’s Hour, every Monday night from midnight-2 AM on WRSU, 88.7 FM.

This is your paper, Rutgers. Please, I beg of you, send me some content!!! Don’t let your free speech rights go to waste!!!

123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 remix of “Livetrap”; Electric Birds does an ambient techno mix of “Hat In The Wind”, 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 which sounds a bit odd with the vocals, which don’t quite fit. Other tracks feature 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 generous use of various electronic effects and flanging and processing. At the same 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 time, there’s also plenty of live instruments used: Matth and Controller7’s mix of 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 “Mouthful” features live-sounding drums, and Why?’s mix of “Poison Pit” features 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 acoustic guitars, handclaps, harmony vocals, and various other elements that he used 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 to great success on his recent releases. Probably most notably to indie kids, The 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 Notwist gives the Neon Golden treatment to “Out In The Open”. Their mix would 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 sound a lot better if they muted the vocals more, though. 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 Overall, this is another welcome release from a collective who I personally think is 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 creating some of the most interesting music around right now, regardless of genre. It 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 also bodes well for the upcoming second album by cLOUDDEAD, one of Anticon’s 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 most highly regarded projects, which promises to be spectacular as well. 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012 123456789012345678901234567890121234567890123456789012345678901212345678901234567890123456789012

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003 hey lindsay, how many is it now? 5? 6? 7? things are getting really busy on the lindsay train aren’t they? well just as long as you take it easy and safely, then it’s all good. i guess you’re just too damn desirable that everyone wants you, even me. *wink wink* now jesse knows the real reason why you call me and smev and not him. finally! it’s out in the open! <3 CH (wow this girl must have the bomb ass pussy cause everyone wants a piece of it. I hear it tastes like vanilla ice cream.) to that fucking scum bag nig and his rim licking shit colored friend, why don’t you try to quadruple up at some other whore’s house. this house ain’t havin’ it. who the fuck do you two think you are? guys like you are a complete and utter waste of space. you don’t deserve to breathe our air, drink our water, and especially our liquor. get some mothafucking respect for women. why don’t you go tongue each other’s assholes and make use of black cock and ram it inside your brown friend. to stacy: you’re so adorable, writing you a personal was worth it because you showed it to everyone. hahaha. i will come visit again soon, don’t worry. have fun in your pink and orange room. Hi evan! Hi everyone. okay the end. why is it that on most asianoriented sites, especially the more popular ones, we are bound to find members who are white guys, but not white girls? i really want to give the white guys the benefit of the doubt and say that they have a genuine interest in asian people instead of a genuine asian fetish, but at the absense of the white girls, it’s very difficult to rationalize this to myself. (asian is a fetish, do you think that white people genuinely like asians? no, asians are merely looked upon as a fetish! they’re viewed as concubineish and as sexual objects meant for sexual gratification of white males.)

h a i k u

The girls below me Sorry for the foosball Ball Coolest chicks EVER

Personals Personals

“Kill yourselves sand niggers; and not by suicide bombs”

What’s worse than finding 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? Finding 1 dead baby in 7 trash cans. (that is pretty gross, it’s really upsetting how women who are supposed to be caring, sensitive, and compassionate could do something so disgusting and horrible. what has the world come to?) Why are Black people so racist!? It does irk me so that there can be BET, yet not WET...because, it does seem a little racist, does it not? yet it’s okay for pure black television...i dunno, I do love seeing the differences of culture, because differences are a beautiful thing. Yet, I don’t like when we seperate ourselves like “first african american woman to win an award” or “BET”....we are all people imo. This goes out to the fuckin fag who ruined out first party by taking hisgay ass and dumping koolaid on everyone in our backyard fagget. Don’t think I don’t know who you are or where you are fagget. I know you got geology mon/wed on busch homo. When we find your ass I’am gonna wreck your ass you cock sucker. You don’t know when or where but I see you prick. So keep rocking you gay ass haircut loser trying to be a tough guido who rolls up to a party with bigger beer muscles than every homo brother of sigma chi. Your done you bitch made HOE! Outro. has anyone seen jorge posada’s chin. if so please call george steinbrenner at 1800tampons. Who invites 70 people to party then sits to themselves in the corner playing beerpong on two different tables? RU baseball. Who doesn’t let anyone else play beer pong, including hot girls? RU baseball. Who’s too pussy to play flipcup? RU baseball. Who’s so cheap that they go around during a party asking for money? RU baseball. Who starts shoving an innocent female telling her to ‘get the fuck out’ because she did not have any money for those pathetic losers? RU baseball. Although I should have expected this type of asshole behavior from RU baseball, they are Yankee fans.

To whom it may concern: PrettyPinkPopsicle (AKA PPP) is currently heavily sedated and residing in Toms River, New Jersey. Miss Popsicle denies ever sharing a file called “Higher Higher” from the movie “Wet Hot American Summer.” However, she did share the full length feature film in .avi format. Any further inquiries as to Miss Popsicle’s health, visiting hours, or the address to which one can send flowers, cards, and gifts can be sent to YoureADumbHoe @hotmail.com

to christopher, excuse me you’re cute as a button. you have the cutest green eyes in the world and i love to stare deeply into them. your touch is so strong, yet so gentle. i love it when you caress my nipples with your long tongue. i also love it when your tongue caresses my anus. it feels so good when i’m asleep and i’m awoken with the feeling of your wet tongue. it makes me feel like i’m home again in my daddy’s bed. w w w. t h e m e d i u m . n e t

this page brought to you by CH

To all you Gook Nazis Personals Editors FUCK YOU! I DONT CARE IF MY ARTICLES ARE TOO LONG! THIS ISNT FUCKING NAZI ISRAEL OR STUPID CHINK SARWAN, THIS IS ZIONIST AMERICA LAND OF THE NAZIS, HOME OF THE OVEN DODGERS. IF YOU WANT TO CENSOR ME GO AHEAD AND BE LIKE THAT DICKED FACED CUNTS OVER AT THE DAILY TARGUM OR THAT FUCKING CHINK, GOOK, NIP, SHIT PAPER CALLED CONVERSASIAN FUCK YOU MAN, FUCK YOU MRS CHENY, FUCK YOU MCORMACK, FUCK YOU MCGREEVEY, AND FUCK YOU! I AINT NEVER SCARED, LIKE DEM SHITS AT THE BET AWARDS! SO FUCK ALL OF YA!

That’s right!! White people are to blame for all the worlds ills! In past preasent and future! No self-responcability! Burn the whities! Burn em all! No one will be spared! C’mon, lets all take credit for our own actions, and not lable an entire ethnic backround for your whoas. We need a Holocaust for White People! We can start right on Busch Campus now i live in the whitest of white towns called Fort Lee (i’m talkin everyone’s a goddamn whitey mcwhitewhite now), and i have to say the history of white people is well shown through the attitudes of the community. hatred, ignorance, close-mindedness... gah! stupid crackers. WHERE’S THE LOVE?!?!

(the only thing white in fort lee are those volunteers at that historical center who showed us how to shoot british with muskets and (ok, well fuck you too. shit.) personals need to be short so to my roommates at 131: you that everyone has a chance need to chill with the jungle at insulting the personals love. white boys are more fun. editor.) i’ll only have an orgy with you to the blonde chick with the guys if chris is involved. love, many ear piercings in my film carol & a lil’ of chris

class who always has to leave early: next time we have a screening bring your blankets again so we can have some fun during the boring films. we might have to wait until they’re not silent movies so no one can w w w. t h e m e d i u m . n e t hear you moan though. - chris.

I wish I was Korean...I hate being white becuase I have no pigment and I burn in the sun, I hate being white becuase the slightest blemish is like being shot with a paintball gun, I hate being white becuase I fear every one, I hate being white becuase I hate everyone, I hate being white becuase when I take off my shirt I blind people...Oh wait I don’t give a shit becuase i’m human, like other humans out there in the world and no matter what pigment you are given you eventually feel the hard ships of the thing we humans call life. please to all those who keep protesting or gathering on college ave for your rallys stop it... i’m looking in your direction gay and lesbian community, not to mention you israelis and palestinians (keep your suicide bombings to yourselves). stop handing me bibles and pamphlets about chinese people trapped in china (thats where charles li belongs assholes!). keep your religion, sexuality, and pamphlets to yourselves and let me get dinner without forcing these things upon me, i’m just going to throw whatever you are handing me on the ground anyway (take that environmentalists). (Ha, ha. This personal is worth reading because I’m sure most of you can relate. I’m sick of getting harrassed by people handing out bibles... isn’t belief in god supposed to be voluntary, not something to be forced down one’s throat?) To that cute blond girl I hung out with twice and had a great time. I had a ton of fun with you discussing music, the 80s, movies and ourselves. I really do enjoy my time with you and I hope you feel the same way as I do. I can’t wait to hang out again since its been a ton of fun. Let me know what’s up. xoxo :-)

To that English major who intrigues me. Coffee, Tea, Movie, Dinner, Tequila, Wine Anything? Give me a call, we should do something this weekend if you don’t have plans. I promise it’ll be a great (say that you’ll have an orgy time. Write me a personal! if they surprise u with a strapon in the ass cause that’s always a great way to wake someone up.)

Personals Personals

“Na, the last 3 snow cones tasted like, awww, you guys are asses…

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003

”

Dear Russian Rockit, You are off point to the max. Go smack some "phatties" and eat some borscht you pinko fagshitter. Tag Geoffrey Rush yet? Way to commando that one...WRONG!!! Love, The Duck This goes out to all the loud ass, black football players in my criminal justice class.Can't you fuckers learn how to sit in a class and shut the fuck up.Unlike you, I have to pay for my tuition and i would like to actually learn something.I know you don't care about the class because you probably won't graduate anyway, but i have to pay attention so i can make something of myself and not become white trailer trash.

I am Canadian. I have been to Japan, Korea and China. And all I have to say is Korea is a shithole and Japan is by far culturally superior to Korea. Korean food is shit. There is garbage everywhere. Seoul stinks and soju is piss. By the way Kimchi sucks too. hey baby want to see the one eye wonder weasle So the yankee’s won. Not like there was any doubt. Now, even after the loss, red sox fans are like, o next year. Bull shit dude. You guys are losser, and will be forever, like the mets. When u go to a frat again, make it a point to steal all their carpets, they seriously hate that. And jiz on the pictures of their moms, yeah.

I fucking hate CLOTHIER.. the fire alarm sounds 4 in the morning - not to mention its everytime i have my bird out, what the fuck is up with that shit. Oh ya i forgot about all the fucking hot girls that are either banging every guy out there that are the biggest queer ass losers except me or have fucking boyfriends in east jabib - im sure they dont have an 8 inch cock like me... fuck clothier - from yours truly- guy who hasnt got laid yet (Wow! You’re the dude I saw outside half asleep with your pecker hanging out. Dude, for a Jew, your hung. Did u grow up next to a Nuclear power plant?)

Yo, all these korean - chinese - japanese arguments in this personals section are pointless and a waste of space. They're all the same. Lets concentrate on some more defining arguments like everyone against fucking jews. Holding fucking rally's and shit. Go do it where your wanted....oh my bad no wants you. Israel inspires shit. (I agree and said this last week. If all you bull dykes out there sent me shit, I wouldn’t have to print so many of them…)

When kooking your egg’s, dont masturbate, fire burns

So i had the delight of attanding a review meeting. and i just though i should let you know how it went. Oral gay sex, followed by streaking in some dudes house. what a horrible night.

Is the background of what you are reading a still shot of the new “Boy’z getting down” movie? Na, its our weekly meeting at work. Come on over to Livingston every Wednesday at 9:30 in Beck 003 and SHOW UP YOUR BOOB’S! And send over you personals to personals@themedium.net Both of em…

me: that skunk beer is the worst him: oh it was keystone light and bud light him: keystone light is bad him: bud light not too bad him: i still have the shits him: dropped like 9-10 bombs today me: ha ha

"Some Dudes..." I have a stye in my fucking eye I didn't know it at first though I thought, "Damn, it hurts!" When I examined it I thought it was a zit So I asked my roommie about this thing that threw me She said, with a sigh, "Yeah, you have a stye." And then I sat up and exclaimed, "What the fuck!"This word was new to meand it made me damn angry "What is this shit?"But Roommie said, "Sit." I would never dream that she had stye cream"Yeah-uh!" I said,"I love taking meds!"My stye made me see how awesome roommates can be So rock on, my Sto! I'll hate to see you go! By: Roommie To the guy that was staring at me on the GG friday. Next time, look at my boobs and not my face, it freeks me out less. (See, girls never tell me this...) To the slut from last friday that fucked me, hi, my name is jason, wish i know yours The arts editor censors material

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003 Fuck all the expos teachers, fuck them in the ass so hard that they bleed from asshole and they have to wear diapers cuz them assholes would be so stretched, shit would run down their legs. Thank you Anyone who still doesn't believe in Evolution theory hasn't spent enough time around blacks. (If you would like to verify this for yourself, there is an African exhibit in downtown New Brunswick at the local chicken joint, check it out every night for the rest of time…)

“MSG’d! Ouch, my stomach lining…”

To the wheazing, coughing asian whose head looks like an enlarged tennis ball. Why dont you get off the fuckin computer and do something else besides playing with Ninja Droids...another thing, stop overplaying the same fuckin songs over and over again. Try to stop from fingering your asshole while asleep, Ya thats right i saw you last night, you had your whole pinky up there. to the full figured chick lookin at me og wed afternoon at douglass, loss a few and talk to me. shit, i got twinkies in my poclets, i cant have all this

Okay. My boyfriend has a working hypothesis which can be stated asfollows: Barbies do not understand that cars = squishy, painful death.We will not stop for you if you are standing in the middle of the street or crossing without a crosswalk just because you have tits. Wait a sec,why am I warning these bitches about (As scabby as her ass may be, this? Could be a good opporwe would still enjoy seeing it, tunity to thin the herd a bit... take a picture and send it (See, I told you I would put in…) this shit in this week…) What is the difference between what do you think is better, the a Jew and a person who has a shades, or the mole. GO big nose, rarely showers, and MOLE. MOLE. MOLE. is cheap? A Jew is cheaper. To the ugly slut in my orgo class, no one wants to see your scabbed covered ass please have some common fucking decency and find a skirt that fits all of your fucking wrinkly cellulite , I swear I rather be fucked to death in a Russian prison than ever touch you, you disgusting whore.

Personals Personals to the kid that keeps playing bagpipes, keep it up big man its a good time. dont let anyone tell you otherwise. and to the guy who is calling this irish music virtuoso a flammer you should take a lesson from the dropkick murphys that real men wear skirts and we should parade you around with vagina in the wind because you are obviosly suffering from chapped lips since your whining like a girl whose vagina hurts. So when u r having sex with a girl in the woods, and she yells, i see a car, its a cop, stupid laws

When little baby Dan got to close for comfort, the mommy cave said, “That’s it!” Here’s how it played out… I fucking hate the New York Fucking Yankees! Those fucking pricks just don't die! That "interlocking NY" is just as evil as the Nazi Swastika! George Steinbrenner is Adolf Hitler and Roger Clemens is the biggest pussy to walk the earth! Derek Jeter takes it up the ass like the whore of Babylon (or a Sorostitute here at RU). Aaron Boone SUCKS! The Fish are going to come into the Bronx and they aren't scared of the Death Star that is Yankee Stadium or Darth Vader in the form of (take your pick of any of those homos). The Fish are the New Hope and they'll win the World Series because the Yankees will be too busy fucking each other in the ass. I hate the Yankees fans even more than I hate the Yanks themselves, they all act like they deserve to win a World Series every year, fucking prima donas. And don't say that Steinbrener spends HIS money on the players, it is the money from the tv/radio contracts. He is such a fucking prick. Joe Torre and Mel Stottlemeyer are the only decent people associated with the Evil Empire. Go Marlins! Ya Gotta Believe! Mets in 2006! I love the cock. Im a guy. I love the boobs, im a guy. I love the donkey, im a nigger a group of people at rutgers seriously needs to ban together and sue brower for disturbance of the peace in our bowels or something. (Well balanced my ass…) www.themedium.net

To Beth from Philly, The hottest and smartest girl on Cook / Doug. Your leadership inspires me. I would love to see you run a meeting in a short skirt and tight tank top. I don't care if it's the fall. You were always so sexy, no wonder I still think about you after all this time. I wonder if you still have those crazy plants in your room. I would hate to knock them over while we're having wild, passionate sex. I didn't want to be too forward, so I figured subtlety was the key, although I was always known for talking too much and for not being very subtle. Damn Beth, Stevie Wonder could see who this is from a mile away. This is note number three. Get the back issues of the medium and follow along, put it together, then send me an email. Holla back! (I have to admit, I take great pride in helping this shit stain in getting the girl of his dreams. However, I, as well as the rest of The Medium staff, to expect a little suttin suttin from “Beth”…) Why does it always seem that every one around me is retarted? i mean, common, play balls on chin. To the dumb knob shlobber that keeps putting the targums in the towers lobby. just because we live on livingston doesn’t mean we like living in and reading shit. bring these things to your moms rape consultation to clean up the mess. that is about all they are good for. What can fit here? Jims pepe!

Japanese skin is whiter than the gooks Japanese nose is taller than the gooks Some Japanese hair is blonde but gooks got black Japanese eyes are bigger than the gooks Japanese looks almost western but gooks always look like gooks

Michael Moore is an anti American piece of garbage. Never mind the movie, but because he made it, for that reason alone I tell others to not watch it. This is an idiot who in an interview said that if there were more black people on the Japan protect Asia??? So 9/11 planes, they might have stealing tresures form Korea stopped the terrorists since Japan and any other Asian na- they tend to be big and straptions are protection? ping. This junk movie fails the Japaneses usually have knowl- first requirement of a docuedge that is much lower than 5 mentary: some foundation in the year old kid. I diodn't know that truth. It makes its points by Japaneses are that uneducated deceiving and by misleading and that stupid. Evben my dogs the viewer. Statements are are smarter than Japanesese. made which are false. Moore fabricated most of this movie. I don't have my own computer. The facts are false the dates are Do you think I should start wrong. He is a liar and a libmasturbating to your B eral fraud.Anti-gunners lie. grade black and white porn or They always have. They alshould I just stick with jerking ways will. No amount of truth off to reruns of Full will change that. house? to the curly blonde chicky that (Well, that is some pickle. is mad funny, you know who u This is what I am going to are. Next time i see you, i deWhat sort a losser puts stick- do for you.. Truth is, stick mand u take of your top and ers on therir ricer for products with Full House. I mean, the dance like a tiki woman while i they dont have, ill tell you, an twins dude, the twins…) vomit on you. Love, you know asian. Bastards I love asain pussy hair. Fluffy! me to the dumb sluts in silvers...LEARN TO FUCKING COOK YOU GOD DAMN WHORES. if i have to go out for another fuckin fire alarm..i will personally go to your room and skull fuck each and every one of you. women have 2 purposes in life...my pleasure..and my dinner.. let's leave the sucking to my cock...and uh..STOP FUCKING UP MY DINNER you sluts.love, the rest of silvers Staney-poo, You're a slut. Have fun nailing "the whale." Haha. Eat shit and die. I'm gonna have someone come shit on your floor, you know who it is. Slut. Love,Santa Claus (Well im not to sure who this is, but the more anti-Staney personals, the better the quality of this poor poor paper…)

Daler once said, “Don’t drink the water in Mexico.” Did he really say this? I don’t fuckin know, but if you find out, come on down to our meetings every Wednesday and let us know how dumb Ned is. If you can’t make it, send in some personals to personals@themedium.net. If I guess send in some shit to the other parts of this paper. You know the shit you skip through to get here.

What’s Shakin’

“Now make it fast..... and Sexy.”

It’s the battle you have been waiting for, nay clamoring for. This week and this week only, I bring to you the Battle of the Shapes. Who will win this monumental conflict between good and evil, deadly and deadlier, smooth and sharp, gay and straight. Who should win? Will it be hexagon, with it’s obtuse corners, and straight sides, or will it be oval, with curves and no obvious, dangerous edges. Send me an e-mail to events@themedium.net to vote for the shape that will dominate the special events on the What’s Shakin’ page. Vote now... and often.

Wednesday October 22th, 2003

Stop fiddling with your dick and try and kick my ass!

You’re goin’ down faster than your sister on my cock!

60 Shots of This is dedicated completed the those who will Mark.

!?!Neutral Shape Special Event!?! MetNY Rugby Division I Championship Tournament Saturday, October 25, 2003 - Busch Fields Come see women kicking each other’s asses ALL DAY LONG to win it all! Rutgers Women are #1 seed - cheer them on to go all the way!

Music, Muthafuckers Wed, Oct. 22-Andrew W.K. at The Downtown, Farmingdale, NY Wed, Oct. 22-Barenaked Ladies at Hammerstein Ballroom, New York, NY Wed, Oct. 22-Girlz Garage Tour: Lillix, Northern State at Theatre Of Living Arts, Philadelphia, PA Thurs, Oct. 23-Dave Koz at Tower Theater, Upper Darby, PA Thu, Oct. 23-Anti-Flag at B.B. King Blues Club & Grill, New York, NY Fri, Oct. 24-Kittie, Motograter, 40 Below Summer at Birch Hill Old Bridge, NJ Fri, Oct. 24-Good Charlotte, Goldfinger at Wachovia Spectrum Philadelphia, PA Fri, Oct. 24-Echo & the Bunnymen at The Stone Pony, Asbury Park, NJ Sat, Oct. 25-The Wrecking Ball: The Youth Ahead, Dark Matter Cadence, English + The 40, Ozers, Utopia Parkway, Skyler at Birch Hill, Old Bridge, NJ Sat, Oct. 25-Travis, Rooney at Tower Theater, Upper Darby, PA Sat, Oct. 25-3 Doors Down, Seether at Electric Factory, Philadelphia, PA. Sun, Oct. 26-Rza at B.B. King Blues Club & Grill, New York, NY Sun, Oct. 26-The Wrecking Ball: Strength In Numbers, Runaway Orange, The Bank Robbers, 54 Vision, Final Element, Exit 131 at Birch Hill, Old Bridge, NJ Sun, Oct. 26-Marilyn Manson at Tower Theater, Upper Darby, PA

Last Night! Wed, Oct. 22-Jim Breuer at The Stress Factory, New Brunswick, NJ

Way to go! to those who have Power Hour and conquer the Century

Stand-up Comedy Wed-Sat, Oct. 22-25-Steve Shaffer at Catch a Rising Star, Princeton, NJ Wed, Oct. 22-9:00 PM Showing: DC Benney, Marc Weiner, Ben Bailey, Nick Dipaolo, Sherrod Small, Robert Kelly, Bill Santiago at The Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal Street, New York Thurs-Sat, Oct. 23-25-Billy Burr at The Stress Factory, New Brunswick, NJ Thurs-Sat, Oct. 23-25-Gary Conrad at Rascal’s, Cherry Hill, NJ Thurs-Sun, Oct. 23-26-Brian Regan at Caroline’s, Broadway, New York Thurs-Sun, Oct. 23-26-Chris Rush at Rascal’s, Ocean Township, NJ

Send events to: events@themedium.net Come to a meeting 9:30 PM at Beck 003 on Livingston

I choose..... Iron Chef Drunkard???