Celebrations

FEBRUARY 18, 2016

Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

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e: d i s In

Party Planning Guide

Peacocks are a top wedding decor trend and motif for invitations, adding extra meaning to your special day.

Release the doves Wedding motifs send a message

By Sharon naylor

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wedding is the start of the couple's new life together, and many elements of weddings contain meaningful symbolism. The bride's white wedding gown finds its roots in symbolizing of innocence and purity. And the wedding cake springs from an idea of adding sweetness and prosperity to the marriage. .

"The Language of Flowers," a Londonoriginated collection of flowers' symbolic meanings based on type and color, is a wonderful source to create added meaning for your wedding day.

The language of flowers grew to popularity as a secret language between courting lovers back in the 1800s, becoming something of a parlor game of secret meanings and invitations. It remains a source of symbolism, particularly in weddings. Among the many publications exploring flowers' meanings and history is Diana Wells' "100 Flowers and How they Got Their Names," in which Wells explains the symbolism of several popular types of flowers. For instance, pink carnations stand for marital bliss, daisies stand for modesty, lilies stand for purity and wheat stands for fertility, according to Wells.

The colors of the flowers also hold meaning, with red roses symbolizing love and desire and white roses symbolizing purity and innocence. Some wedding couples are so superstitious that they avoid certain flower colors for their negative meanings, like jealousy, the threat of a secret admirer, or fear of parting and loss.

Look to "The Old Farmer's Almanac" for the symbolism of different kinds of herbs as well, such as cumin for fidelity, mint for virtue and marjoram for joy and happiness.

If packets of spices or potted herbs are given as wedding favors, share the symbol-

ism on the favor tags.

It's not just flowers and herbs that send a message. According to the experts at Animal Symbols, a website dedicated to animal symbolic meanings, animals and insects also bring symbolic meaning.

Bird: wisdom, joy, intelligence, hope and beauty.

Butterfly: transformation.

Dolphin: transformation and love.

Horse: vitality and beauty.

Bees are seen as symbols of a positive, cooperative community or family, and doves are, of course, signs of peace, kindness and love. Since dragonflies are a popular wedding motif, their meaning of good fortune and luck is especially pleasing to wedding couples. And peacocks — also a very popular motif for wedding details — connote wholeness, beauty, self-assurance and dignity.

If the couple has an affinity for butterflies, the butterfly's symbolic meaning of transformation is perfect, given their transition from single to married life.

Incorporating butterflies, whether it's a live butterfly release after the ceremony, silk butterflies used as wedding cake decor or pretty butterfly motifs on the invitations, is extra meaningful.

Here are some ways to include your favorite flowers, birds and other favorites with meaning into your big day: As motifs on save-the-date cards, personal wedding websites, wedding invitations, bridal shower themes, wedding programs, wedding decor, thank-you notes and more.

Weddings hold so much meaning. The words that are spoken, the first dance song, the flowers that are carried, and any number of other chances exist to add sentiment, meaning, and joy that carry meaning for each couple. n

Announcing that special day Invites make an impact

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n today’s world of cell phones, email, tweets and Facebook posts, some might think mailing invitations isn’t necessary.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Printed invitations get guests excited about the celebration to come and set the tone for your memorable day.

Your invitation defines your style and the tone of the celebration. If it is a formal affair, your invitation should convey that with the style chosen, the paper, layers, ribbons, formal fonts or hand calligraphy on envelopes, the reason for the party (wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, etc.), the time and location of the party all give everyone clues as to how they should dress and is their first glimpse of your event.

For a casual affair, a more relaxed invitation, playful fonts, colors and graphics as well as reason for the party, location and time, also indicate to guests what you have planned.

Wording: Don't get wordy. Only the party details and RSVP info belongs on the invitation.

Do not include directions, accommodations or where you're registered. Those details, if you must include them, should be on a separate insert card.

Registry: In the case of registry, the only place to list this is on a wedding website. For baby showers or other events that use registries, give the information to the hostess, your mother, sisters, best friends, so they can relay the information if asked. If you include your registry information on the invitation, it appears you are more concerned with getting gifts than seeing guests at your event.

Dress code: Your invitations are a clue as to what type of party you have planned. While it is not proper to put this information on your invitation, you could include it in a small font as the last line on an invitation, include the information on your response card or if for a wedding, on your wedding website.

RSVP: Set your RSVP date for three to four weeks after your guests would receive formal invitations. Remember to put a stamp on the RSVP cards. Typically, the envelopes are addressed to come back to the host, but in the case of a wedding, if the bride is keeping track of the replies instead of her parents, her name and address can be on the response envelopes.

Reception menu: Many venues ask that the hosts give them a ballpark figure as to how many of their guests will prefer each type of entrée.

Include menu options within your invitation package, ideally on your reply card, so you can easily provide this information for your vendor.

Envelope etiquette: Even if no children are invited, do not put that on your invitations. The place to state who is invited to the party is on the invitation envelope. Make it clear who is invited by writing each guest's name on the envelopes: If you have guests that reply that they are bringing more people than you invited, or their children, politely let them know that you only have room for the number of guests invited or that it is an adult party and you hope they will still be able to attend without their children or without their additional plus-ones or -twos.

Not inviting people: When it comes to creating Publishers ClIffoRd RIChneR StuaRt RIChneR Executive Editor john C. o’Connell

Section Editor KaRen Bloom Editorial Designer jeffRey a. negRIn Vice President of Sales Rhonda glICKman

One of the most frustrating challenges that hosts encounter is the guest (or guests!) who fail to RSVP, but there are ways you can encourage people to respond.

Responses needed How to get people to RSVP

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Invites are one of the most important elements in that memorable day because they provide guests with crucial information. a guest list, invite the people who are in your lives.

Don't invite people out of obligation or just because you went to their wedding, birthday, graduation, baby shower and then have yet to see them in years.

It's easy to say don't stress over inviting your best friend from high school you haven't seen for years versus your BFF you hang with at work everyday, but go with your heart.

Order extra: It is expensive and time consuming to order more invitations after the fact. If your event is a wedding or other formal occasion, you will want to order at least 25 extra invitations.

Postage: Don't buy postage until you weigh one of your invitations. If your invitations are anything more than the invitation and an envelope or if they are square or an unusual size, take one to the post office complete with all the inserts and have them weighed to ensure you use the correct postage.

For fancy, formal invitations or wedding invitations that could be ruined by the post office's automatic processing equipment, ask about getting your invitations hand cancelled with hand stamping that shows your envelopes have been processed by hand. n

Vice President of Operations mIChael Bologna Production Supervisor ByRon StewaRt Art Director CRaIg CaRdone

Celebrations is an advertising supplement to the Herald Community Newspapers. Copyright © 2016 Richner Communications, Inc. Published by Richner Communications, Inc. 2 Endo Blvd., Garden City, NY 11530 (516) 569-4000 • www.liherald.com

FEBRUARY 18, 2016

Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

e: sid e In Se Party

Planning Guide

Cover Design jeffRey a. negRIn

he invitations have all been sent, and now the waiting begins — and goes on and on… There are ways to entice others to say "yea" or "nay" to the invite.

RSVP stands for "respondez s'il vous plait," which is the French translation of, please respond. Although just about every invitation, whether paper, electronic or verbal, generally includes a response request, many invitees fail to respond in the appropriate timely manner.

This leads to annoying process of tracking down those all-important responses.

Although failure to respond to an invitation can seem like poor etiquette, it continues to happen. Getting people to RSVP can be painful, but it doesn’t need to be. Here are some tips.

Be specific. Let your guests know exactly how to RSVP (i.e.

“Please email your RSVP response to ourwedding@thisemail.com”) and what your RSVP deadline is. If you are asking guests to RSVP on your website, include that text on your invitation. And make sure your website host is set up to handle any responses sent by a guest who thinks your URL is an email address — because it happens more often than you’d think!

If you are collecting RSVPs by mail, set the RSVP deadline two weeks before you actually need the responses to arrive. Most guests will feel good if their response is simply postmarked by the reply date, as the taxman has trained us to do.

Be clear. In this day and age one would hope others would understand what RSVP means.

However, there are some who believe they have to respond only if they are coming to the fete. Change the wording of the invitation to include a more explicit description of what is

desired in a response. (Please respond if you will or will not be attending by this date.)

Give response options. Let's face it, with all of the electronic devices some people would much rather text, e-mail or place a wall post that they'll be attending ... or not. Make it easy for your guests by giving them permission to RSVP in the manner that they prefer: online, email, and text messages are easiest for some, while mailing in an RSVP card might feel more comfortable for an older relative.

Stay organized. As the RSVPs start to roll in, make sure they are captured in one place so that you know both who has and who has not RSVPed, as well what the responses are. If you’re not using a service to capture, organize, and tally your responses, start a guest list and RSVP spreadsheet.

If you are sending paper RSVP cards remember to number each one lightly on the back in pencil and mark down what number card goes with what guest or household on your spreadsheet.

You’d be amazed at the number of cards that are returned without a name on them, and this will make things oh-so-much easier to track.

Follow up (gently). Your guests are interesting, fun people — but this means they are busy too. Many of your guests will need a gentle reminder that the RSVP deadline is coming up.

Plan ahead. Don’t wait until three days before your catering numbers are due to start calling everyone in panic. Add some calendar notes to remind yourself when to send the first gentle reminder and when to start picking up the phone and dialing.

Another sanity-saver is to build in some buffer for the unexpected last minute yay or nay. n

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he season couples choose to get married can affect many aspects of their ceremonies and celebrations.Vendors are in high demand during popular wedding seasons like spring and summer. But those same vendors may be more flexible and less expensive during those times of year when fewer couples tie the knot.

According to The Knot.com, June, August, September and October are the most popular months for couples to say “I do,” while January, February and March are the least popular months to get married.

Wedding dates can affect wedding costs considerably, and knowing this can help couples find the date that works best for them and their budgets.

Value dates Tying the knot in the early part of the year can be a more budget-friendly option for cost-conscious couples. Prices for reception sites and vendors may be lower in January and March than during other times of the year. However, February may not be so budget-friendly thanks to Valentine’s Day. December also may not garner significant discounts thanks to the holiday season, when vendors may be in high demand for holiday parties.

Major sporting events are another consideration. Getting married during Super Sunday weekend may seem like a good idea, but will your guests be able to attend?

And will those guests who show up be crowded at the bar looking at the big game? Save yourself the trouble of negotiating the details of this major football day or another event favored by sports fans by not holding your wedding that day.

Vary the time If you have your heart set on getting married during more popular months to tie the knot, then you may be able to save a bit here and there by being more flexible with the time and day you choose to make your vows. Couples often choose a Friday or Saturday wedding because they believe it will make it most convenient for guests to attend. However, if you provide ample notice to guests, they may be able to take off a Thursday or even a Monday from work, making a Thursday or Sunday wedding a more doable option.

If the weekend is still your ideal time to walk down the aisle, think about having an early wedding ceremony followed by a brunch or lunch reception. You also can customize your wedding to be a cocktail party only, saving you some money.

Have backup options Recognize that if you want to get married on a Saturday at the height of wedding season, you may not get first choice on your venues and vendors. Have a list of wedding providers at the ready just in case your first choices are already booked. n

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Seating solutions

Manage seating arrangements with minimal stress

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Planning seating assignments for a special occasion is no small task. But you can employ strategies to make the process go as smoothly as possible. happy couple or honoree as possible so these guests can see everything and won't feel left out.

Make sure the seating assignment table is easily

accessible. The table on which seating assignment cards will be placed should be accessible upon entering the reception area. A table that's far off in the corner may confuse some guests, who might think the seating is a free-forall and simply sit in the first empty seats they see.

Consider flow between tables when making assignments. While you might have aced the seating assignments at each table, don't overlook the importance of mapping out tables as well. No host wants their guests to feel isolated from friends or family members at other tables, so do your best to ensure there's a good flow between the tables. Plan for tables of family members to be placed next to one another, and do the same with groups of friends. This encourages guests to mingle and can make the occasion much more enjoyable for everyone involved. n

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fter all of the invitations have been sent and RSVPs returned, comes the time-consuming task of figuring out the seating arrangements for the guests.

Such an undertaking can be both fun and stressful.

The fun of making seating arrangements stems from reuniting friends and family members who couples feel will enjoy one another's company and make the special day that much more fun. But feuding family members can make the task of assigning seats somewhat stressful. Couples/ hosts need not be relationship experts to plan seating arrangements that ensure guests have a good time.

Make assignments by hand. While there is software designed specifically to help map out seating assignments, many find it easier to do the seating assignments by hand, which allows more freedom to rearrange tables. In addition, making the seating arrangements by hand ensures that you can spread out guests who might not get along.

Don't seat guests in the hopes of quashing old conflicts. While the jovial spirit of a wedding ceremony and reception or bar/bat mitzvah might seem like the perfect atmosphere for feuding friends or family members to bury the hatchet with regard to old conflicts, this leaves open the potentially ugly possibility that such conflicts might escalate. No one wants their event to be remembered for all the wrong reasons, so keep feuding factions apart when assigning seats.

Keep special needs guests in mind. Some guests may have special needs, and this must be kept in mind when planning seating assignments. Those with medical conditions may benefit from sitting close to the restroom, while others with mobility issues might be best served sitting in a spot where waitstaff can more easily recognize when they need something. Consider sitting older guests, whose vision might not be as strong as it once was, as close to the

Tasteful occasion

Variety is the spice of life when it comes to cuisine restricted diets. While it may not be possible to provide for everyone's specific requirements, it is possible to make some accommodations First, ask the catering manager how his company provides for guests who are vegetarians or vegans.

Ensure that the meal will not be simply a bunch of garnishes and vegetable side dishes lumped together.

In addition, many people have now adopted gluten-free lifestyles. More and more restaurants and establishments have expanded their offerings to include glutenfree items, so confirm if that is an available option. People who are diabetic and must limit their consumption of sugars and carbohydrates may appreciate a selection of sugar-free desserts or lower carbohydrate foods. When you focus on meeting the needs of your guests, it shows you have put in the effort to make everyone feel welcome and comfortable.

Those who have the environment in mind can choose to serve organic foods and look to catering facilities that purchase foods from local vendors and farms. If a banquet hall does not make such concessions, ask if specialty items that benefit organic and local food producers can be brought in. Some caterers will be happy to make the change, but it will likely affect the cost of the reception package to do so.

Food and drink will be some of the

most costly portions of that special day.

Hosts who are interested in keeping costs down can still offer quality foods if they make some changes. Varying the time of day that your reception is held can enable a brunch or luncheon to take place. These foods are often less expensive and laborintensive to prepare, and therefore the cost savings are passed down. Some opt for a cocktail and hors d'oeuvre-only affair — which should clearly be indicated on the invitation so that guests can plan accordingly. Or go even more informal with only a selection of desserts and specialty liquors.

This may be the least expensive option.

Event planners offer these tips: Comparison shop. Even if the first caterer/venue you visit presents an incredible menu that's within your budget, it still helps to comparison shop, as the catering industry is competitive and you might be able to find an equally impressive caterer who can offer a similar menu for less money. Caterers are often creative enough to find something to work within your budget, but you will never know if you do not attempt to negotiate.

Ask if the caterer specializes in a particular cuisine or type of event. When speaking with various catering companies, ask each if they specialize in a particular type of food and if they are used to cater ing specific types of events.

The menu adds to the impact of your fete.

Insist on a tasting. Once you have found the caterer/venue you want, schedule a tasting so you can experience the menu firsthand. Many caterers offer an array of cuisines, and the tasting allows you to narrow down those choices so your menu is not all over the map.

Get a detailed contract. You are spending a significant amount of money. Be sure your contract carefully details what the caterer is providing and when food will be served. Read the contract carefully before signing to ensure the cost and timing of your special day is clearly illustrated. n

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esides what’s happening on the dance floor, it’s the food that’s served at your affair that will stand out.

These occasions — whether wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, Sweet 16, or another milestone event — feature a bevy of different foods to tempt the palates of those in attendance. From appetizers served during the cocktail hour to the last crumb of cake, food plays a big role in a celebration.

Choosing foods for a reception or party can take a little forethought to ensure most guests are happy with the menu selections.

The first rule of thumb is variety. As much as budget allows, give guests the choice over what they dine on. During the cocktail hour — if there is one — the hosts can play with many different tastes and offerings. For those who want to be creative, this is the time to do so. Exotic flavors can be served alongside more traditional offerings that guests recognize. For example, offer Asian fusion appetizers that may have spice alongside more traditional items, like miniature quiches.

During the main course of the meal, give guests a few options. Most catering facilities will offer suggestions in their meal packages. Hosts typically choose to offer a meat dish, a poultry and a seafood. This caters to a wide variety of diners.

It is important to recognize that many people have food allergies or are on

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Beautiful blooms Selecting wedding day flowers O ne of the big decisions couples must make when planning their weddings concerns their floral arrangements. The right floral arrangements will add substantial aesthetic appeal to ceremonies and receptions.

The beauty and the aroma of fresh-cut flowers can create a welcoming atmosphere and complement the beauty and the style of a wedding wardrobe. Flowers are often the first things that guests see upon arriving for the ceremony, and they may even be something guests take home at the end of the night. Flowers create an air of romance, and most couples want to make flowers — whether fresh or silk or both — an integral part of their wedding day.

As with any decision when planning a wedding, choosing the right flowers requires some research and a basic knowledge of which flowers will convey the message and the theme of your wedding. The number of colors, textures and combinations that can be created are so numerous that couples may feel the decision on the floral arrangements is best left to the florist.

But it doesn't take a lot of expertise to know what you want, and it is important for couples to convey their feelings to the florist.

Understand that there are no right or wrong choices when selecting flowers for your wedding. You can also expect a good florist to provide you with helpful advice, so be prepared to ask plenty of questions and to run ideas past your florist once you reach that stage. Here are some tips to consider: Work with a florist you trust and like.

All florists are not the same, so finding one you can trust and will enjoy working with can make all the difference. Many couples have little or no experience with floral arrangements prior to planning their weddings, so it can calm couples’ nerves to work with someone they trust in such situations.

Florists with significant wedding experience will no doubt make a host of recommendations based on couples’ budgets and preferences, so couples might be more inclined to listen to that advice if they are working with someone they trust. Ask relatives, friends or coworkers if they can recommend any florists whose wedding work they are familiar with.

Choose in-season or native flowers.

Those working with tight budgets may want to choose in-season flowers or those native to the area where they will be tying the knot. In-season and native flowers won’t need to be ordered or shipped in from afar, which can be costly. In-season and native flowers tend to be more abundant as well, and the greater their availability the less you are likely to pay for them.

Repurpose floral arrangements.

Another way to save on floral arrangements is to repurpose flowers throughout the day. Once bridesmaids no longer need their bouquets, use them to decorate gift tables or cocktail areas. Floral arrangements on display during the ceremony can be removed once you have both said “I do” and moved into the reception area where they can be enjoyed through the night. Go over any repurposing you plan to do with your reception hall manager prior to your wedding day so he knows where and when to move the arrangements.

Go big. Some flowers simply bloom larger than others, and choosing such flowers may help you save money since you won’t need to buy as many flowers as you would if you were to go with smaller blooms.

Once you find a florist to work with, discuss your options with regard to doing more with less. Many florists embrace the challenge to be creative within a budget, so you might just be surprised and impressed by what they come up with. n

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he success of your milestone event is often dictated by the activities that keep guests busy. And at many parties, it’s all about what happens on the dance floor. As veteran hosts know, who you hire to keep the music flowing and the guests dancing can make or break your affair.

When the evening is over, guests want to remember dancing to their favorite songs and how the music complemented the event. A professional DJ can be instrumental in setting the mood of a party, helping to create a festive atmosphere while choosing the right songs to enhance cerContinued on page S-9

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What to look for when hiring a DJ and recognize when to liven things up and get the crowd back on the dance floor.

Always meet with your prospective DJ/ MC before signing any agreement. This is very important: A DJ who does not offer to meet with you does not care about the success of your event and is most likely more concerned with the money.

If you choose an entertaiment company with multiple DJs, be sure the name of your DJ is noted on the signed agreement. Not all DJs are the same, so you should find someone you can trust, and one with which you have a good personality match.

The music mix Talk to the DJ about your preferences as to the playlist. Together you can work out a playlist that will accommodate as many guests as possible. The DJ also will help keep the party on track, alerting guests as to when food is served or when certain games or activities will be played. If ever during a consultation you feel that the DJ is not listening to your suggestions or is unwilling to play the type of music you would like, then this is not the person for you. Most will listen to requests and make suggestions for certain songs that will fit in with the event's theme.

Remember to mention if any songs should not be played. Depending on the age group off-color songs or ones with certain lyrics may be discouraged.

In addition to keeping in touch and working with you on the planning of the event, the DJ should confirm your reservation and arrive early to set up. n

tain moments throughout the event.

That’s why it’s so important to choose a DJ that will fit with your goals and the scope of your event.

Why hire a DJ? One reason many couples and party hosts choose a DJ is affordability. Disc jockeys are traditionally less expensive than bands, and a DJ will have access to a selection of music that spans various generations and genres.

Some folks prefer a DJ because they enjoy hearing the real thing instead of a band covering a favorite artist. Whereas a band may be playing their own rendition of songs, a DJ will have the original recordings or particular dance mixes that are familiar to guests. While the music is playing, a DJ may offer some type of entertainment, such as leading guests on guided dances or distributing fun give-aways to those on the dance floor. Some DJs will work in conjunction with emcees or party professionals who mingle with the crowd and dance along.

Selecting a DJ When considering whom to hire, it helps to first get recommendations from friends and family or to check out in person how the DJ has performed at a prior function.

Consider a DJ who has a proven track record. If guests walked away from a particular party with glowing accounts of a DJ's work, then that should bear considerable weight as you make your decision. It is one thing to simply play music, but a DJ will need to establish a rapport with the crowd

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Registry redefined Wedding registry regrets you shouldn't have

By Kristen Castillo

L

et's take a quiz: Registering for gifts is A) exciting, B) exhausting, C) overwhelming, D) a dream come true or E) all of the above? Chances are you answered E. Registering for gifts involves a bundle of emotions.

"From what to register for to how to notify wedding guests, registries can cause a lot of angst," says Sara Margulis, founder and CEO of wedding registry site Honeyfund.com, who says etiquette is the No. 1 concern for couples.

Still, the registry process can be very rewarding, especially if you're detailed in preselecting items and experiences that are a fit for you and your spouse.

"Couples should focus on what they use regularly or what they frequently wish they had," says Laura Holliday, CMO of Zola, a modern registry platform that combines gifts, experiences and cash. "The same rule that applies to clothes applies here: If you don't use it for over a year, you should get rid of it. Or in this case, don't get it in the first place!"

While it's easy to sign up for lots of stuff, you need to make sure you really want and will use the gifts you receive. Some items are fun but you'll never use them; others are practical but not your style.

"Your registry is a place to ask for the gifts you'd never buy yourself, as well as to upgrade what you already have and use," says Lizzy Ellingson, founder of Blueprint Registry, which creates a customized wish list based on the couple's home.

No matter what you ask for, make sure your registry choices are spot-on. Gift-giving experts share their advice on how to avoid registry regrets.

Registering for things you think you'll need in the future (but end up never using). When Einat Naveh, founder and CEO of Bridal Boost, got married seven years

ago, she registered for a variety of things even through she didn't have enough space to store them.

"We were in a tiny one-bedroom apartment in the West Village when we got married, so I registered for a wine fridge, among other items," she says. "That wine fridge is still in my parents' attic," she adds.

Naveh suggests registering for high-quality pots, pans, knives and small kitchen appliances, which can be used every day.

Not registering for big pieces. While you don't want to register for big-ticket items you won't use or won't be able to store, you should consider your party and holiday entertaining needs.

"When it's just you and your fiance at home, it's easy to forget that one day you might be hosting 15 people for Thanksgiving," says event planner Alexandria Proko of Alexandria Catherine Events. "Go ahead and add some items that would be useful in these situations, such as large serving pieces or sets of matching china —you'll have them for a long time and won't need to splurge on them later!"

Not requesting nontraditional items you'll really use. Many couples shy away asking for nontraditional things such as outdoor equipment or money toward a new mattress. It's OK to register for unusual gifts.

"Your guests would rather give you something you will use, not just what tradition says should be on your registry," says Ellingson.

Feeling obligated to register for certain things. Did you register for a gravy boat because you feel like every couple needs one? Did you ask for a blender even though you already have one? Don't register for what your mom wants you to have.

"When couples have regrets about the gifts they receive,

Modern wedding registries can include traditional gifts like kitchen tools as well as nontraditional gifts such as cameras and vacations.

it's usually because they registered for what they think they should register for, and not what they really want," says Holliday, who admits she has a box of platters in her basement — wedding gifts from five years ago that were never used.

"If I could do it over again, I would do it very differently."

Feeling awkward about wanting money. Whether you don't need household items or you're simply saving for your future, sometimes cash gifts are what you want most.

"If you prefer cash, create a Honeyfund wish list of items you will spend it on," says Margulis. "It makes guests feel more connected to you and excited to contribute toward something you will use or do together."

No matter what gifts you get, "Receive every gift with grace and gratitude, even if you don't need or want it," says Margulis. "The act of giving and receiving is a special interaction between people, and should be treated with care." n

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Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

e Se

e: d i s In

Party Planning Guide

Peacocks are a top wedding decor trend and motif for invitations, adding extra meaning to your special day.

Release the doves Wedding motifs send a message

By Sharon naylor

821176

A

wedding is the start of the couple's new life together, and many elements of weddings contain meaningful symbolism. The bride's white wedding gown finds its roots in symbolizing of innocence and purity. And the wedding cake springs from an idea of adding sweetness and prosperity to the marriage. .

"The Language of Flowers," a Londonoriginated collection of flowers' symbolic meanings based on type and color, is a wonderful source to create added meaning for your wedding day.

The language of flowers grew to popularity as a secret language between courting lovers back in the 1800s, becoming something of a parlor game of secret meanings and invitations. It remains a source of symbolism, particularly in weddings. Among the many publications exploring flowers' meanings and history is Diana Wells' "100 Flowers and How they Got Their Names," in which Wells explains the symbolism of several popular types of flowers. For instance, pink carnations stand for marital bliss, daisies stand for modesty, lilies stand for purity and wheat stands for fertility, according to Wells.

The colors of the flowers also hold meaning, with red roses symbolizing love and desire and white roses symbolizing purity and innocence. Some wedding couples are so superstitious that they avoid certain flower colors for their negative meanings, like jealousy, the threat of a secret admirer, or fear of parting and loss.

Look to "The Old Farmer's Almanac" for the symbolism of different kinds of herbs as well, such as cumin for fidelity, mint for virtue and marjoram for joy and happiness.

If packets of spices or potted herbs are given as wedding favors, share the symbol-

ism on the favor tags.

It's not just flowers and herbs that send a message. According to the experts at Animal Symbols, a website dedicated to animal symbolic meanings, animals and insects also bring symbolic meaning.

Bird: wisdom, joy, intelligence, hope and beauty.

Butterfly: transformation.

Dolphin: transformation and love.

Horse: vitality and beauty.

Bees are seen as symbols of a positive, cooperative community or family, and doves are, of course, signs of peace, kindness and love. Since dragonflies are a popular wedding motif, their meaning of good fortune and luck is especially pleasing to wedding couples. And peacocks — also a very popular motif for wedding details — connote wholeness, beauty, self-assurance and dignity.

If the couple has an affinity for butterflies, the butterfly's symbolic meaning of transformation is perfect, given their transition from single to married life.

Incorporating butterflies, whether it's a live butterfly release after the ceremony, silk butterflies used as wedding cake decor or pretty butterfly motifs on the invitations, is extra meaningful.

Here are some ways to include your favorite flowers, birds and other favorites with meaning into your big day: As motifs on save-the-date cards, personal wedding websites, wedding invitations, bridal shower themes, wedding programs, wedding decor, thank-you notes and more.

Weddings hold so much meaning. The words that are spoken, the first dance song, the flowers that are carried, and any number of other chances exist to add sentiment, meaning, and joy that carry meaning for each couple. n

Announcing that special day Invites make an impact

I

n today’s world of cell phones, email, tweets and Facebook posts, some might think mailing invitations isn’t necessary.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Printed invitations get guests excited about the celebration to come and set the tone for your memorable day.

Your invitation defines your style and the tone of the celebration. If it is a formal affair, your invitation should convey that with the style chosen, the paper, layers, ribbons, formal fonts or hand calligraphy on envelopes, the reason for the party (wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, etc.), the time and location of the party all give everyone clues as to how they should dress and is their first glimpse of your event.

For a casual affair, a more relaxed invitation, playful fonts, colors and graphics as well as reason for the party, location and time, also indicate to guests what you have planned.

Wording: Don't get wordy. Only the party details and RSVP info belongs on the invitation.

Do not include directions, accommodations or where you're registered. Those details, if you must include them, should be on a separate insert card.

Registry: In the case of registry, the only place to list this is on a wedding website. For baby showers or other events that use registries, give the information to the hostess, your mother, sisters, best friends, so they can relay the information if asked. If you include your registry information on the invitation, it appears you are more concerned with getting gifts than seeing guests at your event.

Dress code: Your invitations are a clue as to what type of party you have planned. While it is not proper to put this information on your invitation, you could include it in a small font as the last line on an invitation, include the information on your response card or if for a wedding, on your wedding website.

RSVP: Set your RSVP date for three to four weeks after your guests would receive formal invitations. Remember to put a stamp on the RSVP cards. Typically, the envelopes are addressed to come back to the host, but in the case of a wedding, if the bride is keeping track of the replies instead of her parents, her name and address can be on the response envelopes.

Reception menu: Many venues ask that the hosts give them a ballpark figure as to how many of their guests will prefer each type of entrée.

Include menu options within your invitation package, ideally on your reply card, so you can easily provide this information for your vendor.

Envelope etiquette: Even if no children are invited, do not put that on your invitations. The place to state who is invited to the party is on the invitation envelope. Make it clear who is invited by writing each guest's name on the envelopes: If you have guests that reply that they are bringing more people than you invited, or their children, politely let them know that you only have room for the number of guests invited or that it is an adult party and you hope they will still be able to attend without their children or without their additional plus-ones or -twos.

Not inviting people: When it comes to creating Publishers ClIffoRd RIChneR StuaRt RIChneR Executive Editor john C. o’Connell

Section Editor KaRen Bloom Editorial Designer jeffRey a. negRIn Vice President of Sales Rhonda glICKman

One of the most frustrating challenges that hosts encounter is the guest (or guests!) who fail to RSVP, but there are ways you can encourage people to respond.

Responses needed How to get people to RSVP

T

Invites are one of the most important elements in that memorable day because they provide guests with crucial information. a guest list, invite the people who are in your lives.

Don't invite people out of obligation or just because you went to their wedding, birthday, graduation, baby shower and then have yet to see them in years.

It's easy to say don't stress over inviting your best friend from high school you haven't seen for years versus your BFF you hang with at work everyday, but go with your heart.

Order extra: It is expensive and time consuming to order more invitations after the fact. If your event is a wedding or other formal occasion, you will want to order at least 25 extra invitations.

Postage: Don't buy postage until you weigh one of your invitations. If your invitations are anything more than the invitation and an envelope or if they are square or an unusual size, take one to the post office complete with all the inserts and have them weighed to ensure you use the correct postage.

For fancy, formal invitations or wedding invitations that could be ruined by the post office's automatic processing equipment, ask about getting your invitations hand cancelled with hand stamping that shows your envelopes have been processed by hand. n

Vice President of Operations mIChael Bologna Production Supervisor ByRon StewaRt Art Director CRaIg CaRdone

Celebrations is an advertising supplement to the Herald Community Newspapers. Copyright © 2016 Richner Communications, Inc. Published by Richner Communications, Inc. 2 Endo Blvd., Garden City, NY 11530 (516) 569-4000 • www.liherald.com

FEBRUARY 18, 2016

Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

e: sid e In Se Party

Planning Guide

Cover Design jeffRey a. negRIn

he invitations have all been sent, and now the waiting begins — and goes on and on… There are ways to entice others to say "yea" or "nay" to the invite.

RSVP stands for "respondez s'il vous plait," which is the French translation of, please respond. Although just about every invitation, whether paper, electronic or verbal, generally includes a response request, many invitees fail to respond in the appropriate timely manner.

This leads to annoying process of tracking down those all-important responses.

Although failure to respond to an invitation can seem like poor etiquette, it continues to happen. Getting people to RSVP can be painful, but it doesn’t need to be. Here are some tips.

Be specific. Let your guests know exactly how to RSVP (i.e.

“Please email your RSVP response to ourwedding@thisemail.com”) and what your RSVP deadline is. If you are asking guests to RSVP on your website, include that text on your invitation. And make sure your website host is set up to handle any responses sent by a guest who thinks your URL is an email address — because it happens more often than you’d think!

If you are collecting RSVPs by mail, set the RSVP deadline two weeks before you actually need the responses to arrive. Most guests will feel good if their response is simply postmarked by the reply date, as the taxman has trained us to do.

Be clear. In this day and age one would hope others would understand what RSVP means.

However, there are some who believe they have to respond only if they are coming to the fete. Change the wording of the invitation to include a more explicit description of what is

desired in a response. (Please respond if you will or will not be attending by this date.)

Give response options. Let's face it, with all of the electronic devices some people would much rather text, e-mail or place a wall post that they'll be attending ... or not. Make it easy for your guests by giving them permission to RSVP in the manner that they prefer: online, email, and text messages are easiest for some, while mailing in an RSVP card might feel more comfortable for an older relative.

Stay organized. As the RSVPs start to roll in, make sure they are captured in one place so that you know both who has and who has not RSVPed, as well what the responses are. If you’re not using a service to capture, organize, and tally your responses, start a guest list and RSVP spreadsheet.

If you are sending paper RSVP cards remember to number each one lightly on the back in pencil and mark down what number card goes with what guest or household on your spreadsheet.

You’d be amazed at the number of cards that are returned without a name on them, and this will make things oh-so-much easier to track.

Follow up (gently). Your guests are interesting, fun people — but this means they are busy too. Many of your guests will need a gentle reminder that the RSVP deadline is coming up.

Plan ahead. Don’t wait until three days before your catering numbers are due to start calling everyone in panic. Add some calendar notes to remind yourself when to send the first gentle reminder and when to start picking up the phone and dialing.

Another sanity-saver is to build in some buffer for the unexpected last minute yay or nay. n

Seating solutions

Manage seating arrangements with minimal stress

A

fter all of the invitations have been sent and RSVPs returned, comes the time-consuming task of figuring out the seating arrangements for the guests.

Such an undertaking can be both fun and stressful.

The fun of making seating arrangements stems from reuniting friends and family members who couples feel will enjoy one another's company and make the special day that much more fun. But feuding family members can make the task of assigning seats somewhat stressful. Couples/ hosts need not be relationship experts to plan seating arrangements that ensure guests have a good time.

Make assignments by hand. While there is software designed specifically to help map out seating assignments, many find it easier to do the seating assignments by hand, which allows more freedom to rearrange tables. In addition, making the seating arrangements by hand ensures that you can spread out guests who might not get along.

Don't seat guests in the hopes of quashing old conflicts. While the jovial spirit of a wedding ceremony and reception or bar/bat mitzvah might seem like the perfect atmosphere for feuding friends or family members to bury the hatchet with regard to old conflicts, this leaves open the potentially ugly possibility that such conflicts might escalate. No one wants their event to be remembered for all the wrong reasons, so keep feuding factions apart when assigning seats.

Keep special needs guests in mind. Some guests may have special needs, and this must be kept in mind when planning seating assignments. Those with medical conditions may benefit from sitting close to the restroom, while others with mobility issues might be best served sitting in a spot where waitstaff can more easily recognize when they need something. Consider sitting older guests, whose vision might not be as strong as it once was, as close to the

Planning seating assignments for a special occasion is no small task. But you can employ strategies to make the process go as smoothly as possible. happy couple or honoree as possible so these guests can see everything and won't feel left out.

Make sure the seating assignment table is easily

accessible. The table on which seating assignment cards will be placed should be accessible upon entering the reception area. A table that's far off in the corner may confuse some guests, who might think the seating is a free-forall and simply sit in the first empty seats they see.

Consider flow between tables when making assignments. While you might have aced the seating assignments at each table, don't overlook the importance of mapping out tables as well. No host wants their guests to feel isolated from friends or family members at other tables, so do your best to ensure there's a good flow between the tables. Plan for tables of family members to be placed next to one another, and do the same with groups of friends. This encourages guests to mingle and can make the occasion much more enjoyable for everyone involved. n

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Variety is the spice of life when it comes to cuisine

B

esides what’s happening on the dance floor, it’s the food that’s served at your affair that will stand out.

These occasions — whether wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, Sweet 16, or another milestone event — feature a bevy of different foods to tempt the palates of those in attendance. From appetizers served during the cocktail hour to the last crumb of cake, food plays a big role in a celebration.

Choosing foods for a reception or party can take a little forethought to ensure most guests are happy with the menu selections.

The first rule of thumb is variety. As much as budget allows, give guests the choice over what they dine on. During the cocktail hour — if there is one — the hosts can play with many different tastes and offerings. For those who want to be creative, this is the time to do so. Exotic flavors can be served alongside more traditional offerings that guests recognize. For example, offer Asian fusion appetizers that may have spice alongside more traditional items, like miniature quiches.

During the main course of the meal, give guests a few options. Most catering facilities will offer suggestions in their meal packages. Hosts typically choose to offer a meat dish, a poultry and a seafood. This caters to a wide variety of diners.

It is important to recognize that many people have food allergies or are on

restricted diets. While it may not be possible to provide for everyone's specific requirements, it is possible to make some accommodations First, ask the catering manager how his company provides for guests who are vegetarians or vegans.

Ensure that the meal will not be simply a bunch of garnishes and vegetable side dishes lumped together.

In addition, many people have now adopted gluten-free lifestyles. More and more restaurants and establishments have expanded their offerings to include glutenfree items, so confirm if that is an available option. People who are diabetic and must limit their consumption of sugars and carbohydrates may appreciate a selection of sugar-free desserts or lower carbohydrate foods. When you focus on meeting the needs of your guests, it shows you have put in the effort to make everyone feel welcome and comfortable.

Those who have the environment in mind can choose to serve organic foods and look to catering facilities that purchase foods from local vendors and farms. If a banquet hall does not make such concessions, ask if specialty items that benefit organic and local food producers can be brought in. Some caterers will be happy to make the change, but it will likely affect the cost of the reception package to do so.

Food and drink will be some of the

most costly portions of that special day.

Hosts who are interested in keeping costs down can still offer quality foods if they make some changes. Varying the time of day that your reception is held can enable a brunch or luncheon to take place. These foods are often less expensive and laborintensive to prepare, and therefore the cost savings are passed down. Some opt for a cocktail and hors d'oeuvre-only affair — which should clearly be indicated on the invitation so that guests can plan accordingly. Or go even more informal with only a selection of desserts and specialty liquors.

This may be the least expensive option.

Event planners offer these tips: Comparison shop. Even if the first caterer/venue you visit presents an incredible menu that's within your budget, it still helps to comparison shop, as the catering industry is competitive and you might be able to find an equally impressive caterer who can offer a similar menu for less money. Caterers are often creative enough to find something to work within your budget, but you will never know if you do not attempt to negotiate.

Ask if the caterer specializes in a particular cuisine or type of event. When speaking with various catering companies, ask each if they specialize in a particular type of food and if they are used to cater ing specific types of events.

The menu adds to the impact of your fete.

Insist on a tasting. Once you have found the caterer/venue you want, schedule a tasting so you can experience the menu firsthand. Many caterers offer an array of cuisines, and the tasting allows you to narrow down those choices so your menu is not all over the map.

Get a detailed contract. You are spending a significant amount of money. Be sure your contract carefully details what the caterer is providing and when food will be served. Read the contract carefully before signing to ensure the cost and timing of your special day is clearly illustrated. n

S W I S S M A D E S I N C E 18 58

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Steppin’ lively

What to look for when hiring a DJ may offer some type of entertainment, such as leading guests on guided dances or distributing fun give-aways to those on the dance floor. Some DJs will work in conjunction with emcees or party professionals who mingle with the crowd and dance along.

Selecting a DJ When considering whom to hire, it helps to first get recommendations from friends and family or to check out in person how the DJ has performed at a prior function.

Consider a DJ who has a proven track record. If guests walked away from a particular party with glowing accounts of a DJ's work, then that should bear considerable weight as you make your decision. It is one thing to simply play music, but a DJ will need to establish a rapport with the crowd and recognize when to liven things up and get the crowd back on the dance floor.

Always meet with your prospective DJ/ MC before signing any agreement. This is very important: A DJ who does not offer to meet with you does not care about the success of your event and is most likely more concerned with the money.

If you choose an entertaiment company with multiple DJs, be sure the name of your DJ is noted on the signed agreement. Not all DJs are the same, so you should find someone you can trust, and one with which you have a good personality match.

Carefully researching your DJ options can mean the difference between a successful occasion where guests had a good time and a dull event that lacked a spark.

The music mix Talk to the DJ about your preferences as to the playlist. Together you can work out a playlist that will accommodate as many guests as possible. The DJ also will help keep the party on track, alerting guests as to when food is served or when certain games or activities will be played. If ever during a consultation you feel that the DJ is not listening to your suggestions or is unwilling to play the type of music you would like, then this is not the person for you. Most will listen to requests and make

suggestions for certain songs that will fit in with the event's theme.

Remember to mention if any songs should not be played. Depending on the age group off-color songs or ones with certain lyrics may be discouraged.

In addition to keeping in touch and working with you on the planning of the event, the DJ should confirm your reservation and arrive early to set up. n

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he success of your milestone event is often dictated by the activities that keep guests busy. And at many parties, it’s all about what happens on the dance floor. As veteran hosts know, who you hire to keep the music flowing and the guests dancing can make or break your affair.

When the evening is over, guests want to remember dancing to their favorite songs and how the music complemented the event. A professional DJ can be instrumental in setting the mood of a party, helping to create a festive atmosphere while choosing the right songs to enhance cer tain moments throughout the event.

That’s why it’s so important to choose a DJ that will fit with your goals and the scope of your event.

Why hire a DJ? One reason many couples and party hosts choose a DJ is affordability. Disc jockeys are traditionally less expensive than bands, and a DJ will have access to a selection of music that spans various generations and genres.

Some folks prefer a DJ because they enjoy hearing the real thing instead of a band covering a favorite artist. Whereas a band may be playing their own rendition of songs, a DJ will have the original recordings or particular dance mixes that are familiar to guests. While the music is playing, a DJ

Setting the date

And will those guests who show up be crowded at the bar looking at the big game? Save yourself the trouble of negotiating the details of this major football day or another event favored by sports fans by not holding your wedding that day.

Vary the time If you have your heart set on getting married during more popular months to tie the knot, then you may be able to save a bit here and there by being more flexible with the time and day you choose to make your vows. Couples often choose a Friday or Saturday wedding because they believe it will make it most convenient for guests to attend. However, if you provide ample notice to guests, they may be able to take off a Thursday or even a Monday from work, making a Thursday or Sunday wedding a more doable option.

If the weekend is still your ideal time to walk down the aisle, think about having an early wedding ceremony followed by a brunch or lunch reception. You also can customize your wedding to be a cocktail party only, saving you some money.

Have backup options Recognize that if you want to get married on a Saturday at the height of wedding season, you may not get first choice on your venues and vendors. Have a list of wedding providers at the ready just in case your first choices are already booked. n

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he season couples choose to get married can affect many aspects of their ceremonies and celebrations.Vendors are in high demand during popular wedding seasons like spring and summer. But those same vendors may be more flexible and less expensive during those times of year when fewer couples tie the knot.

According to The Knot.com, June, August, September and October are the most popular months for couples to say “I do,” while January, February and March are the least popular months to get married.

Wedding dates can affect wedding costs considerably, and knowing this can help couples find the date that works best for them and their budgets.

Value dates Tying the knot in the early part of the year can be a more budget-friendly option for cost-conscious couples. Prices for reception sites and vendors may be lower in January and March than during other times of the year. However, February may not be so budget-friendly thanks to Valentine’s Day. December also may not garner significant discounts thanks to the holiday season, when vendors may be in high demand for holiday parties.

Major sporting events are another consideration. Getting married during Super Sunday weekend may seem like a good idea, but will your guests be able to attend?

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Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

e Se

e: d i s In

Party Planning Guide

Peacocks are a top wedding decor trend and motif for invitations, adding extra meaning to your special day.

Release the doves Wedding motifs send a message

By Sharon naylor

821176

A

wedding is the start of the couple's new life together, and many elements of weddings contain meaningful symbolism. The bride's white wedding gown finds its roots in symbolizing of innocence and purity. And the wedding cake springs from an idea of adding sweetness and prosperity to the marriage. .

"The Language of Flowers," a Londonoriginated collection of flowers' symbolic meanings based on type and color, is a wonderful source to create added meaning for your wedding day.

The language of flowers grew to popularity as a secret language between courting lovers back in the 1800s, becoming something of a parlor game of secret meanings and invitations. It remains a source of symbolism, particularly in weddings. Among the many publications exploring flowers' meanings and history is Diana Wells' "100 Flowers and How they Got Their Names," in which Wells explains the symbolism of several popular types of flowers. For instance, pink carnations stand for marital bliss, daisies stand for modesty, lilies stand for purity and wheat stands for fertility, according to Wells.

The colors of the flowers also hold meaning, with red roses symbolizing love and desire and white roses symbolizing purity and innocence. Some wedding couples are so superstitious that they avoid certain flower colors for their negative meanings, like jealousy, the threat of a secret admirer, or fear of parting and loss.

Look to "The Old Farmer's Almanac" for the symbolism of different kinds of herbs as well, such as cumin for fidelity, mint for virtue and marjoram for joy and happiness.

If packets of spices or potted herbs are given as wedding favors, share the symbol-

ism on the favor tags.

It's not just flowers and herbs that send a message. According to the experts at Animal Symbols, a website dedicated to animal symbolic meanings, animals and insects also bring symbolic meaning.

Bird: wisdom, joy, intelligence, hope and beauty.

Butterfly: transformation.

Dolphin: transformation and love.

Horse: vitality and beauty.

Bees are seen as symbols of a positive, cooperative community or family, and doves are, of course, signs of peace, kindness and love. Since dragonflies are a popular wedding motif, their meaning of good fortune and luck is especially pleasing to wedding couples. And peacocks — also a very popular motif for wedding details — connote wholeness, beauty, self-assurance and dignity.

If the couple has an affinity for butterflies, the butterfly's symbolic meaning of transformation is perfect, given their transition from single to married life.

Incorporating butterflies, whether it's a live butterfly release after the ceremony, silk butterflies used as wedding cake decor or pretty butterfly motifs on the invitations, is extra meaningful.

Here are some ways to include your favorite flowers, birds and other favorites with meaning into your big day: As motifs on save-the-date cards, personal wedding websites, wedding invitations, bridal shower themes, wedding programs, wedding decor, thank-you notes and more.

Weddings hold so much meaning. The words that are spoken, the first dance song, the flowers that are carried, and any number of other chances exist to add sentiment, meaning, and joy that carry meaning for each couple. n

Announcing that special day Invites make an impact

I

n today’s world of cell phones, email, tweets and Facebook posts, some might think mailing invitations isn’t necessary.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Printed invitations get guests excited about the celebration to come and set the tone for your memorable day.

Your invitation defines your style and the tone of the celebration. If it is a formal affair, your invitation should convey that with the style chosen, the paper, layers, ribbons, formal fonts or hand calligraphy on envelopes, the reason for the party (wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, etc.), the time and location of the party all give everyone clues as to how they should dress and is their first glimpse of your event.

For a casual affair, a more relaxed invitation, playful fonts, colors and graphics as well as reason for the party, location and time, also indicate to guests what you have planned.

Wording: Don't get wordy. Only the party details and RSVP info belongs on the invitation.

Do not include directions, accommodations or where you're registered. Those details, if you must include them, should be on a separate insert card.

Registry: In the case of registry, the only place to list this is on a wedding website. For baby showers or other events that use registries, give the information to the hostess, your mother, sisters, best friends, so they can relay the information if asked. If you include your registry information on the invitation, it appears you are more concerned with getting gifts than seeing guests at your event.

Dress code: Your invitations are a clue as to what type of party you have planned. While it is not proper to put this information on your invitation, you could include it in a small font as the last line on an invitation, include the information on your response card or if for a wedding, on your wedding website.

RSVP: Set your RSVP date for three to four weeks after your guests would receive formal invitations. Remember to put a stamp on the RSVP cards. Typically, the envelopes are addressed to come back to the host, but in the case of a wedding, if the bride is keeping track of the replies instead of her parents, her name and address can be on the response envelopes.

Reception menu: Many venues ask that the hosts give them a ballpark figure as to how many of their guests will prefer each type of entrée.

Include menu options within your invitation package, ideally on your reply card, so you can easily provide this information for your vendor.

Envelope etiquette: Even if no children are invited, do not put that on your invitations. The place to state who is invited to the party is on the invitation envelope. Make it clear who is invited by writing each guest's name on the envelopes: If you have guests that reply that they are bringing more people than you invited, or their children, politely let them know that you only have room for the number of guests invited or that it is an adult party and you hope they will still be able to attend without their children or without their additional plus-ones or -twos.

Not inviting people: When it comes to creating Publishers ClIffoRd RIChneR StuaRt RIChneR Executive Editor john C. o’Connell

Section Editor KaRen Bloom Editorial Designer jeffRey a. negRIn Vice President of Sales Rhonda glICKman

One of the most frustrating challenges that hosts encounter is the guest (or guests!) who fail to RSVP, but there are ways you can encourage people to respond.

Responses needed How to get people to RSVP

T

Invites are one of the most important elements in that memorable day because they provide guests with crucial information. a guest list, invite the people who are in your lives.

Don't invite people out of obligation or just because you went to their wedding, birthday, graduation, baby shower and then have yet to see them in years.

It's easy to say don't stress over inviting your best friend from high school you haven't seen for years versus your BFF you hang with at work everyday, but go with your heart.

Order extra: It is expensive and time consuming to order more invitations after the fact. If your event is a wedding or other formal occasion, you will want to order at least 25 extra invitations.

Postage: Don't buy postage until you weigh one of your invitations. If your invitations are anything more than the invitation and an envelope or if they are square or an unusual size, take one to the post office complete with all the inserts and have them weighed to ensure you use the correct postage.

For fancy, formal invitations or wedding invitations that could be ruined by the post office's automatic processing equipment, ask about getting your invitations hand cancelled with hand stamping that shows your envelopes have been processed by hand. n

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FEBRUARY 18, 2016

Celebrations Getting ready for that big day

e: sid e In Se Party

Planning Guide

Cover Design jeffRey a. negRIn

he invitations have all been sent, and now the waiting begins — and goes on and on… There are ways to entice others to say "yea" or "nay" to the invite.

RSVP stands for "respondez s'il vous plait," which is the French translation of, please respond. Although just about every invitation, whether paper, electronic or verbal, generally includes a response request, many invitees fail to respond in the appropriate timely manner.

This leads to annoying process of tracking down those all-important responses.

Although failure to respond to an invitation can seem like poor etiquette, it continues to happen. Getting people to RSVP can be painful, but it doesn’t need to be. Here are some tips.

Be specific. Let your guests know exactly how to RSVP (i.e.

“Please email your RSVP response to ourwedding@thisemail.com”) and what your RSVP deadline is. If you are asking guests to RSVP on your website, include that text on your invitation. And make sure your website host is set up to handle any responses sent by a guest who thinks your URL is an email address — because it happens more often than you’d think!

If you are collecting RSVPs by mail, set the RSVP deadline two weeks before you actually need the responses to arrive. Most guests will feel good if their response is simply postmarked by the reply date, as the taxman has trained us to do.

Be clear. In this day and age one would hope others would understand what RSVP means.

However, there are some who believe they have to respond only if they are coming to the fete. Change the wording of the invitation to include a more explicit description of what is

desired in a response. (Please respond if you will or will not be attending by this date.)

Give response options. Let's face it, with all of the electronic devices some people would much rather text, e-mail or place a wall post that they'll be attending ... or not. Make it easy for your guests by giving them permission to RSVP in the manner that they prefer: online, email, and text messages are easiest for some, while mailing in an RSVP card might feel more comfortable for an older relative.

Stay organized. As the RSVPs start to roll in, make sure they are captured in one place so that you know both who has and who has not RSVPed, as well what the responses are. If you’re not using a service to capture, organize, and tally your responses, start a guest list and RSVP spreadsheet.

If you are sending paper RSVP cards remember to number each one lightly on the back in pencil and mark down what number card goes with what guest or household on your spreadsheet.

You’d be amazed at the number of cards that are returned without a name on them, and this will make things oh-so-much easier to track.

Follow up (gently). Your guests are interesting, fun people — but this means they are busy too. Many of your guests will need a gentle reminder that the RSVP deadline is coming up.

Plan ahead. Don’t wait until three days before your catering numbers are due to start calling everyone in panic. Add some calendar notes to remind yourself when to send the first gentle reminder and when to start picking up the phone and dialing.

Another sanity-saver is to build in some buffer for the unexpected last minute yay or nay. n

Seating solutions

Manage seating arrangements with minimal stress

A

fter all of the invitations have been sent and RSVPs returned, comes the time-consuming task of figuring out the seating arrangements for the guests.

Such an undertaking can be both fun and stressful.

The fun of making seating arrangements stems from reuniting friends and family members who couples feel will enjoy one another's company and make the special day that much more fun. But feuding family members can make the task of assigning seats somewhat stressful. Couples/ hosts need not be relationship experts to plan seating arrangements that ensure guests have a good time.

Make assignments by hand. While there is software designed specifically to help map out seating assignments, many find it easier to do the seating assignments by hand, which allows more freedom to rearrange tables. In addition, making the seating arrangements by hand ensures that you can spread out guests who might not get along.

Don't seat guests in the hopes of quashing old conflicts. While the jovial spirit of a wedding ceremony and reception or bar/bat mitzvah might seem like the perfect atmosphere for feuding friends or family members to bury the hatchet with regard to old conflicts, this leaves open the potentially ugly possibility that such conflicts might escalate. No one wants their event to be remembered for all the wrong reasons, so keep feuding factions apart when assigning seats.

Keep special needs guests in mind. Some guests may have special needs, and this must be kept in mind when planning seating assignments. Those with medical conditions may benefit from sitting close to the restroom, while others with mobility issues might be best served sitting in a spot where waitstaff can more easily recognize when they need something. Consider sitting older guests, whose vision might not be as strong as it once was, as close to the

Planning seating assignments for a special occasion is no small task. But you can employ strategies to make the process go as smoothly as possible. happy couple or honoree as possible so these guests can see everything and won't feel left out.

Make sure the seating assignment table is easily

accessible. The table on which seating assignment cards will be placed should be accessible upon entering the reception area. A table that's far off in the corner may confuse some guests, who might think the seating is a free-forall and simply sit in the first empty seats they see.

Consider flow between tables when making assignments. While you might have aced the seating assignments at each table, don't overlook the importance of mapping out tables as well. No host wants their guests to feel isolated from friends or family members at other tables, so do your best to ensure there's a good flow between the tables. Plan for tables of family members to be placed next to one another, and do the same with groups of friends. This encourages guests to mingle and can make the occasion much more enjoyable for everyone involved. n

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Honey is the No. 1 wedding favor for 2016. favorite flavors from a displayed collection of three or four varieties, or choose a jam or jelly that matches the wedding color scheme, such as a raspberry jam to coordinate with pink wedding colors.

Barbecue sauce. Especially if the wedding has a country feel to it, or features ribs or barbecued chicken wings in local flavors, the gift of barbecue sauce shares a memory of the day and allows guests to indulge later.

Salsa or hot sauces share a similar vibe. n

516.284.8248 | DrBosDiet.com

822273

fter a few years of skipping wedding favors as a budget-saving decision — with the marrying couple donating to their favorite charity in lieu of giving guests favors in many cases — fabulous favors have now made their way back onto must-have lists.

With guests traveling, sometimes great distances, to attend the wedding, couples want to thank them for their time and efforts on their big day. And with the growth of creative and edible favors, so admired on wedding blogs and on Pinterest and Instagram, wedding couples enjoy having the chance to select or make favors that impress.

Here are the most popular wedding favor items from The Wedding Report: Mini-pots of honey. "Honey wedding favors are popular now because they have multiple levels of appeal," says Mary Kosenski, owner of E+M Wedding Favors and E+M Gold Beekeepers, makers of raw honey products. "The first is that honey is used and enjoyed in so many different ways, such as added to tea, spread on toast or scones, drizzled on appetizers, and eaten as-is. Many wedding couples are also very interested in what beekeepers are doing to protect the world's honeybee populations that are so essential to our environment.

Jams and jellies. Whether purchased or homemade, jars of jams or jellies are a welcome treat. Allow guests to pick their own

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Tasteful occasion

Variety is the spice of life when it comes to cuisine restricted diets. While it may not be possible to provide for everyone's specific requirements, it is possible to make some accommodations First, ask the catering manager how his company provides for guests who are vegetarians or vegans.

Ensure that the meal will not be simply a bunch of garnishes and vegetable side dishes lumped together.

In addition, many people have now adopted gluten-free lifestyles. More and more restaurants and establishments have expanded their offerings to include glutenfree items, so confirm if that is an available option. People who are diabetic and must limit their consumption of sugars and carbohydrates may appreciate a selection of sugar-free desserts or lower carbohydrate foods. When you focus on meeting the needs of your guests, it shows you have put in the effort to make everyone feel welcome and comfortable.

Those who have the environment in mind can choose to serve organic foods and look to catering facilities that purchase foods from local vendors and farms. If a banquet hall does not make such concessions, ask if specialty items that benefit organic and local food producers can be brought in. Some caterers will be happy to make the change, but it will likely affect the cost of the reception package to do so.

Food and drink will be some of the

most costly portions of that special day.

Hosts who are interested in keeping costs down can still offer quality foods if they make some changes. Varying the time of day that your reception is held can enable a brunch or luncheon to take place. These foods are often less expensive and laborintensive to prepare, and therefore the cost savings are passed down. Some opt for a cocktail and hors d'oeuvre-only affair — which should clearly be indicated on the invitation so that guests can plan accordingly. Or go even more informal with only a selection of desserts and specialty liquors.

This may be the least expensive option.

Event planners offer these tips: Comparison shop. Even if the first caterer/venue you visit presents an incredible menu that's within your budget, it still helps to comparison shop, as the catering industry is competitive and you might be able to find an equally impressive caterer who can offer a similar menu for less money. Caterers are often creative enough to find something to work within your budget, but you will never know if you do not attempt to negotiate.

Ask if the caterer specializes in a particular cuisine or type of event. When speaking with various catering companies, ask each if they specialize in a particular type of food and if they are used to cater ing specific types of events.

The menu adds to the impact of your fete.

Insist on a tasting. Once you have found the caterer/venue you want, schedule a tasting so you can experience the menu firsthand. Many caterers offer an array of cuisines, and the tasting allows you to narrow down those choices so your menu is not all over the map.

Get a detailed contract. You are spending a significant amount of money. Be sure your contract carefully details what the caterer is providing and when food will be served. Read the contract carefully before signing to ensure the cost and timing of your special day is clearly illustrated. n

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esides what’s happening on the dance floor, it’s the food that’s served at your affair that will stand out.

These occasions — whether wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, Sweet 16, or another milestone event — feature a bevy of different foods to tempt the palates of those in attendance. From appetizers served during the cocktail hour to the last crumb of cake, food plays a big role in a celebration.

Choosing foods for a reception or party can take a little forethought to ensure most guests are happy with the menu selections.

The first rule of thumb is variety. As much as budget allows, give guests the choice over what they dine on. During the cocktail hour — if there is one — the hosts can play with many different tastes and offerings. For those who want to be creative, this is the time to do so. Exotic flavors can be served alongside more traditional offerings that guests recognize. For example, offer Asian fusion appetizers that may have spice alongside more traditional items, like miniature quiches.

During the main course of the meal, give guests a few options. Most catering facilities will offer suggestions in their meal packages. Hosts typically choose to offer a meat dish, a poultry and a seafood. This caters to a wide variety of diners.

It is important to recognize that many people have food allergies or are on

Steppin’ lively

What to look for when hiring a DJ may offer some type of entertainment, such as leading guests on guided dances or distributing fun give-aways to those on the dance floor. Some DJs will work in conjunction with emcees or party professionals who mingle with the crowd and dance along.

Selecting a DJ When considering whom to hire, it helps to first get recommendations from friends and family or to check out in person how the DJ has performed at a prior function.

Consider a DJ who has a proven track record. If guests walked away from a particular party with glowing accounts of a DJ's work, then that should bear considerable weight as you make your decision. It is one thing to simply play music, but a DJ will need to establish a rapport with the crowd and recognize when to liven things up and get the crowd back on the dance floor.

Always meet with your prospective DJ/ MC before signing any agreement. This is very important: A DJ who does not offer to meet with you does not care about the success of your event and is most likely more concerned with the money.

If you choose an entertaiment company with multiple DJs, be sure the name of your DJ is noted on the signed agreement. Not all DJs are the same, so you should find someone you can trust, and one with which you have a good personality match.

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Remember to mention if any songs should not be played. Depending on the age group off-color songs or ones with certain lyrics may be discouraged.

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he success of your milestone event is often dictated by the activities that keep guests busy. And at many parties, it’s all about what happens on the dance floor. As veteran hosts know, who you hire to keep the music flowing and the guests dancing can make or break your affair.

When the evening is over, guests want to remember dancing to their favorite songs and how the music complemented the event. A professional DJ can be instrumental in setting the mood of a party, helping to create a festive atmosphere while choosing the right songs to enhance cer tain moments throughout the event.

That’s why it’s so important to choose a DJ that will fit with your goals and the scope of your event.

Why hire a DJ? One reason many couples and party hosts choose a DJ is affordability. Disc jockeys are traditionally less expensive than bands, and a DJ will have access to a selection of music that spans various generations and genres.

Some folks prefer a DJ because they enjoy hearing the real thing instead of a band covering a favorite artist. Whereas a band may be playing their own rendition of songs, a DJ will have the original recordings or particular dance mixes that are familiar to guests. While the music is playing, a DJ

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he season couples choose to get married can affect many aspects of their ceremonies and celebrations.Vendors are in high demand during popular wedding seasons like spring and summer. But those same vendors may be more flexible and less expensive during those times of year when fewer couples tie the knot.

According to The Knot.com, June, August, September and October are the most popular months for couples to say “I do,” while January, February and March are the least popular months to get married.

Wedding dates can affect wedding costs considerably, and knowing this can help couples find the date that works best for them and their budgets.

Value dates Tying the knot in the early part of the year can be a more budget-friendly option for cost-conscious couples. Prices for reception sites and vendors may be lower in January and March than during other times of the year. However, February may not be so budget-friendly thanks to Valentine’s Day. December also may not garner significant discounts thanks to the holiday season, when vendors may be in high demand for holiday parties.

Major sporting events are another consideration. Getting married during Super Sunday weekend may seem like a good idea, but will your guests be able to attend?

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And will those guests who show up be crowded at the bar looking at the big game? Save yourself the trouble of negotiating the details of this major football day or another event favored by sports fans by not holding your wedding that day.

Vary the time If you have your heart set on getting married during more popular months to tie the knot, then you may be able to save a bit here and there by being more flexible with the time and day you choose to make your vows. Couples often choose a Friday or Saturday wedding because they believe it will make it most convenient for guests to attend. However, if you provide ample notice to guests, they may be able to take off a Thursday or even a Monday from work, making a Thursday or Sunday wedding a more doable option.

If the weekend is still your ideal time to walk down the aisle, think about having an early wedding ceremony followed by a brunch or lunch reception. You also can customize your wedding to be a cocktail party only, saving you some money.

Have backup options Recognize that if you want to get married on a Saturday at the height of wedding season, you may not get first choice on your venues and vendors. Have a list of wedding providers at the ready just in case your first choices are already booked. n

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