PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM
TIVE PHILLY’S NEWS ALTERNA
MAY 9-16, 2018
Jokes for days In advance of his Philly show, PW swan dives inside the intrepid mind of comic Hannibal Buress SEE PAGE 14
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FROM THE EDITOR
Hot day, cold shoulder KERITH GABRIEL
S
o I may come off a little insensitive this week, but it’s only because I played an active role in what was a disturbing amount of insensitivity at the expense of a homeless woman. Last week, I was walking by the Wanamaker Building when a woman stopped me and asked if I could give her a dollar so she could buy some food. Customarily, I never give out money but instead offer a sandwich and a drink as an alternative. For me, it’s part humanitarian duty, part social experiment to see if the person truly wants a bite to eat or if they’re only looking for me to unknowingly enable a bad habit. I could tell at ďŹ rst glance she needed the help. She was an older woman, could’ve been someone’s sweet grandmother in a perfect world, but in the one we live in she was dressed in sweats on what was an 80-degree day, clutching a plastic shopping bag of her life’s possessions. It was her approach that caught my attention, she wasn’t so in-yourface as most on-street approached, instead it was a quiet mumble – the kind you give when you’re too embarrassed to ask for something you desperately need. I stopped and offered to get her something inside the coffee shop located just inside the Wanamaker Building. She followed me into the building and I asked her what she wanted when we got to the counter. But before she could order the barista behind the counter shouted, “she can’t be in here, sir. I can’t sell her anything.â€? I responded that he wasn’t selling her anything, he was selling me whatever she chose. The cold shoulder that followed directed at both of us was as offensive as it was humiliating. The woman, obviously embarrassed with onlookers sitting inside the lobby cafe staring at both of us, quickly grabbed a Snapple and said, “I’ll just take this.â€? DeďŹ ant, I said, “No, get a sandwich, if you want
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one.â€? She thought about it for a second and said, “it’s OK, this will do.â€? The barista took my money, handed me the change and didn’t even reply, when I killed him with kindness in a reply of “thank you, have a good day.â€? Before, I could get my change, she was already looking to make her exit out. Look, I don’t know the past history. I don’t know her past dealings inside this little coffee shop, but there was no reason she should have not been allowed service. She wore a shirt, had on shoes and other than the way she looked was anything but a threat. It really opened my eyes to just how many of us treat the homeless like trash and not like human beings with a story to tell. With that being said, I had some words for that barista, but I wasn’t about to set it off inside the Wanamaker Building. So I’ll do it here (and gladly to his face should he ever read this piece and want me to show myself). If there was a reason for which you can tell me why you would deny that woman service beyond her simple appearance then please, I’m all ears and you can peep how to get a hold of me in our masthead. God forbid the answer if “company policy,â€? then we have much bigger issues here. But if the basis was that she didn’t ďŹ t the clientele of the downtown socialites, shoppers and tourists who pass through that building on a daily, then you need to do some serious soul searching, my friend. Bottom line: she was nothing more than a willing, paying customer, then by all means sell her a fucking Snapple without making her feel like the scum of the Earth. Show a little compassion, man. And show it beyond just the people who leave a few bucks in your tip jar because they have expendable cash to buy an overpriced iced latte. I’m not saying you need to be Gandhi, and I’m not saying that’s who I am trying to be because of my decision to help her. I, apparently unlike you, are just well aware that most of us not of the 1 percent are just a few paychecks away from being in her shoes. So consider this a friendly reminder of that the next time you put on your apron and stand behind that counter to serve Philadelphia. Q TWITTER: @SPRTSWTR
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state city
Connect with us: @PhillyWeekly EDITORIAL Kerith Gabriel, Editor kgabriel@philadelphiaweekly.com Max Marin, Staff Writer, mmarin@phillyweekly.com CONTRIBUTORS: A.D. Amorosi, Swabreen Bakr, Kriston Bethel, Jared Brey, Andrea Cantor, Gregory Dale, Sarah Rose Etter, Scott Himelein, Hayden Mitman, Andrea Monzo, Timaree Schmit, Alex Vuocolo, Daniel Barnes, Anne Johnson, Dan Savage, Logan Gardner, Sabrina Vourvoulias BUSINESS Perry Corsetti, COO, pcorsetti@bsmphilly.com Deidre Simms, Director of Major Accounts, deidre@phillyweekly.com PRODUCTION Mark Homer, Design and Layout PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY 2 Executive Campus, Cherry Hill, N.J. 08002 Phone: 215-563-7400 Classified: 215-354-3054
OVERHEARD Forbes discovers Fishtown
in PHILLY
“That guy just ran faster than the 17 bus gets me from City Hall to South Philly. That should tell you everything you need to know about SEPTA.�
– Guy tells friend after watching Kenyan marathoner Daniel Kemoi win this year’s Broad Street Run in a record time of 45 minutes, 5 seconds. In SEPTA defense, the streets are generally populated with other vehicles on the road and weigh tons more than Kemoi – but we get it.
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N
ational publications have long excelled at vapid, off-key lifestyle featurettes about Philly – the ones both natives and transplants alike bond over with mutual scorn. This week’s award goes to Forbes for their laughably bad “How Fishtown, Philadelphia Became America’s Hottest New Neighborhood.â€? The author of this 4,000-word tongue job, Peter Lane Taylor, divides the neighborhood by the made-up demographic categories of “New Fishâ€? and “Old Fishâ€? – which is deďŹ nitely not a thing, nor will it ever be a thing, God help us all. There’s plenty to shit on here, from the hackneyed image of the well-to-do brushing shoulders with those yucky “heroin addictsâ€? to the inexplicably lazy Google Earth analysis of the River Wards. Q
Two things‌ To get excited about this week in Philly certainly has to be the official opening of Spruce Street Harbor Park on May 12, just in time for a collective of 70-plus degree days. In completely unrelated news, Restore, the city’s first medicinal marijuana facility located in Fishtown, is now a week old, with plans of more facilities throughout the Greater Philadelphia Region to come on the horizon, according to Andrew Faulkner, the chief technical officer of Smokin’ Hot Solutions, the agency that represents Restore. Q 3+,/$'(/3+,$:((./< &20
A Storm passed through Philly She wasn’t expected to arrive until November at Club Risque, but Philly was graced with the presence of Stormy Daniels on May 7-8 inside the Penthouse Club on 3001 Castor Avenue in Port Richmond. The surprise visit was for a magazine release party on the heels of Daniels being named Penthouse’s Pet of the Century. Daniels, perhaps more publicly known as the adult ďŹ lm star whom Donald Trump forgot and then remembered he paid $130,000 in hush money to was on hand to sign copies of the magazine which the ďŹ rst 100 guests received a free copy of. Q
GentriďŹ cation, complete. But the worst sin with all of the hype from this Forbes article is arguably the dumbest: Fishtown isn’t, as the article suggests, some well-hidden gentrification experiment. There’s a Starbucks opening next to a Lululemon on Frankford Avenue as you read this, for God’s sake. Q
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41 Percentage of people in the Greater Philadelphia Region who feel lonely, according to a recent Philly.com report that cited a Cigna study. With that group of locals, 51 percent claim they seldom feel understood and few people really know the real them. It could come into play that Philadelphians are notoriously known for abiding by the no new friends policy, with many of us still kicking it with people we’ve known since grade school. Might be. 0$<
NEWS
IMAGE: KERITH GABRIEL
Sheriff sales have aided in the growth of everything from development to brick and mortar headquarters for small business owners, but a recent report brings into question at what cost.
Page accountability PMNA, Philly sheriff incensed over recent report questioning cost benefit of sheriff sale advertising BY KERITH GABRIEL
L
et’s just say it’s been a weird week inside the Philadelphia OfďŹ ce of the Sheriff. The city ofďŹ ce, spearheaded by Sheriff Jewell Williams, has been forced to prove its worth after an Inquirer report raised questions into allegedly egregious spending from the Sheriff’s OfďŹ ce to host monthly and quarterly sheriff sale advertising in daily and weekly newspapers, as well as other community publications. The aftermath led to Terry Egger, publisher of Philadelphia Media Network publisher Terry Egger, which owns the Inquirer, Daily News and Philly.com, attempting to distance the companyitself from its own sheriff sale ad revenue, coincidentally on the week the Daily News was scheduled to host a 16-page insert. Egger noted that PMN will honor its agreement with the Sheriff’s OfďŹ ce, but ran the insert pro bono. The Inquirer received $1.6 million in sheriff sale ads last year – a hefty share of the $8 million pot divided among 20 regional publications. Those publications include two Newspaper Media Group holdings: Philadelphia Weekly and the South Philly Re-
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Cover image of the Sheriff's insert in the Daily News that ran pro bono after parent company Philadelphia Media Network made the decision to do so on the heels of an Inquirer investigative report.
view. The initial report and subsequent distancing from PMN ofďŹ cials incensed not only Williams but many leaders of Philadelphia-based publications, who claim the Inquirer report sought to devalue the worth and effectiveness of diverse, ethnic community newspapers in its hosting of sheriff sale advertisements. The group of newspaper leaders were led by Mark Segal, head of the Philadelphia Multicultural Newspaper Association and owner and publisher of the Philadelphia Gay News, who penned an op-ed that was submitted to the Inquirer’s Editorial Board. Segal claims the op-ed which ran in the paper’s May 2 edition was a shell of his original submission. Segal also noted the original Inquirer report failed to include numbers indicating that sheriff’s sale ads got a better return for the city from free community publications – which charge a lower rate than the Inquirer on a monthly bas at no cost to readers. “We need to make the point and have [the Inquirer] admit to what they did was privileged bias reporting to beneďŹ t themselves at our expense,â€? Segal wrote via email. He also vowed to make a request to the Board to have its staffers undergo “bias sensitivity training.â€? A response from the Inquirer’s Editorial Board was not returned at the time of this report. However, in addition to rufing the feathers of many community publications, some which the Inquirer report prove greatly beneďŹ t from the ad revenue, Williams emphasized his own scorn from the report. At the meeting with regional news leaders, Williams said that reports about him and his ofďŹ ce rarely show “the good his ofďŹ ce does for the city,â€? and that he’s “getting sick and tired of having his name dragged through the mudâ€? – a common refrain from elected ofďŹ cials who receive unattering press. Looking at recent numbers provided by the OfďŹ ce of the Sheriff, it’s apparent why he was none to pleased at the recent report. According to that April 30 insert provided by the Sheriff’s OfďŹ ce and distributed by the Philadelphia Daily News, sheriff sales have directly provided a total of $28.5 million for both the city ($15 million) and $13.5 million back to over 100 individuals in excess funding. And with the OfďŹ ce not hosting the listing of these sales online, Williams noted the beneďŹ t for people of all types, speciďŹ cally ones that “don’t read the Inquirer,â€? from the hosting of these ads in free newspapers. On May 2, Grant-Cardenas Communications, the public and media relations arm of the Sheriff’s OfďŹ ce, largely responsible with the placement of sheriff sale ads in various publications, sent out a release on the heels of recent city budget hearings in which Williams testiďŹ ed that since taking ofďŹ ce, his team – which includes 408 employees including 314 uniform personnel with a proposed annual budget of $24.5 million – has amassed $250 million in revenue for the city across a variety of facets – primarily sheriff sales. Q TWITTER: @SPRTSWTR
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NEWS
IMAGE COURTESY: PHL CITY COUNCIL
Philadelphia District Attorney Larry Krasner has long had his share of critics, but perhaps none to the extent of what was suggested by a former city ADA.
Suggestive language Former city ADA under fire after controversial comment aimed at Philly DA Krasner BY MAX MARIN & RYAN BRIGGS
S
upporters of Philadelphia DA Larry Krasner are crying foul over a Facebook post from a 28-year veteran of the Philadelphia District Attorney’s OfďŹ ce that they say reads like a veiled threat against the city’s top prosecutor. The uproar emerged from an exchange between former assistant district attorneys Richard Sax and George
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Former ADA George Shotzbarger has since edited the above Facebook comment to aimed at Larry Krasner.
Shotzbarger criticizing Krasner’s administration. Shotzbarger makes an allusion to a scene in Harper Lee’s classic 1960 novel, “To Kill a Mockingbird,â€? in which the protagonist Atticus Finch shoots a rabid dog. “The incumbent is a menace to public safety. Like the rabid dog in TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD he might need to be ‘put down’,â€? Shotzbarger wrote, one week ago. The former ADA, who left the ofďŹ ce in 2007, now says his comment was merely “a play on words.â€? “The same way that Atticus Finch takes a rie and puts down the rabid dog that’s endangering the children in the neighborhood, Krasner is a danger to public safety,â€?
he said. “But ‘put down’ means knocked a few pegs lower, ignored, removed from ofďŹ ce...His policies need to be put down.â€? Krasner, a longtime defense attorney, has earned the ire of a number of current and former ADAs for introducing an intensive regimen of reforms to the ofďŹ ce – moving on reducing certain forms of cash bail, reduced sentencing and a focus on combating police misconduct – that some view as being “soft on crime.â€? Sax, who left the ofďŹ ce in 2017, has been one of Krasner’s most publicly vocal critics. In Shotzbarger’s words, Krasner’s policies are “antithetical to law enforcement.â€? “It’s not responsible to crime victims – if you’re feeling sorry for the guy who robs the Wawa instead of the customers and cashier‌It’s not responsible,â€? he added. However, Krasner’s supporters did not appreciate the subtleties of Shotzbarger’s Facebook comment. Johndi Harrell, the executive director of the Center for Returning Citizens and a member of the Coalition for a Just DA, a pro-Krasner group, feels threats against Krasner should be taken seriously by the criminal justice system. “There’s a limit to what you can say in public and, as a former ADA, he should know the proper language to use to hold a civil conversation,â€? Harrell said. The longtime Krasner supporter said he works with people who are incarcerated over offenses that stemmed from social media disputes – which is why he does not take online threats lightly. “What happens on social media has real impact on our lives. What if somebody who is not mentally stable [are] to read that comment and take it to heart?â€? he wondered aloud. A spokesperson for the DAO said they were “aware of the postâ€? but did not offer further comment. However, there is a history of city prosecutors taking apparent online threats seriously, whether credible or not. Former DA Seth Williams notably advocated for the PA Attorney General’s prosecution of blogger Joshua Scott Albert for apparently advocating for his assassination in a Facebook group, which Albert has said was satire. Albert was jailed for eight months and eventually took a plea deal over the charges. (Krasner coincidentally represented Albert in that case.) "I guess you can only joke about killing people if you like cops," Albert said, of Shotzbarger's comment. Online discourse around Krasner’s tenure has generally ratcheted up as the DA has garnered more nationwide attention. A string of anonymous Twitter accounts with apparent connections to the DAO have sprung up to lob criticisms at Krasner. Other opponents have taken issue with defense attorney and Krasner transition team member Michael Coard’s controversial statements about police ofďŹ cers. Shotzbarger added that while he had clariďŹ ed the intent of his comment after being admonished by Sax a week later, he was now considering deleting the post altogether. “I did not mean for him to be shot in the street like a rabid dog. I didn't see the need to explain that,â€? he said. “If people can't understand the subtlety then perhaps I should remove the post.â€? Q TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN & RW_BRIGGS
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NEWS IMAGE COURTESY OF PHILLYCAM/FACEBOOK
From left to right, Princeton professor Keeanga-Yamahtta Taylor, host of "The Dig" podcast Daniel Denvir, Sen. Bernie Sanders, Philly DA Larry Krasner and Civil Rights Corps litigation director Premal Dharia.
Bernie in Philly 3 takeaways from the Vermont senator’s conversation on ending mass incarceration BY MAX MARIN
B
ernie Sanders paid us a visit May 4 to champion Braddock Mayor John Fetterman’s bid for lieutenant governor. Before stumping for the fellow self-styled progressive, however, the 2016 presidential candidate joined with another political ďŹ rebrand, Philly’s DA Larry Krasner, to talk solutions to ending mass incarceration in America. The hour-long conversation at PhillyCAM’s studios in Center City – moderated by Daniel Denvir, the host of Jacobin magazine’s “The Digâ€? podcast – covered a lot of ground in the arena of criminal justice reform. These were a few of the big takeaways.
Sanders sees bipartisan interest in reforming mass incarceration. The United State incarcerates more people than any country on the planet with more than 2.2 million people behind bars, when you factor in the total number under correctional supervision. As President Trump and Attorney General Jeff Sessions push a law-and-order agenda that critics argue would further boost these numbers, Sanders Progressive backers have pushed a new wave of candidates into ofďŹ ce. Sanders says he remains optimistic about bipartisan approach to the issue. “There are some conservatives who understand we can spend $80 billion (or part of that) in a lot smarter way than just building jails and locking people up,â€? Sanders said at the panel. How else should governments spend that money?
Public sector investment is key to success of communities that have been gutted by mass incarceration and crime. Princeton professor and author KeeangaYamahtta Taylor said the success of the ďŹ ght on mass incarceration and crime will come
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with building up the communities ravaged most by those forces. “We have to look at these things together,� Taylor said. “But also, we have to invest – not reinvest – in poor and working class communities.� Taylor added that investment needs to occur not just in public education – but also in public health, in libraries and in other facilities.
Many law-and-order prosecutors tout themselves as progressives while they continue to perpetuate draconian carceral policy. Manhattan DA Cyrus Vance’s zealously prosecutes misdemeanor offenses. New Orleans district attorney Leon Cannizzaro incarcerated a rape victim for failing to testify. Los Angeles DA Jackie Lacey secured four of the nation’s 31 death sentences in 2016. They are but three of many self-styled prosecutors across the country, noted Civil Rights Corps litigation director Premal Dharia. Democrats seeking ofďŹ ce recognize the value of progressive ideals as rhetorical tools, but seldom follow through on a policy level, Dharia said, citing the above examples. So how can you tell the difference between the fake progressive and the law-and-order prosecutor in disguise? “What is often missing is a tie to the community that is being served or impacted by the work that [prosecutors] are doing,â€? Dharia said. With Krasner in Philadelphia, Dharia sees that engagement on the ground, citing the Coalition for a Just DA, a decarceration advocacy group, was integral to Krasner’s election and continues to engage with his ofďŹ ce’s decision making on a daily basis. “What we saw here was real partnership,â€? Dharia noted. Q TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN
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CULTURE
Familiar faces Hometown performances add local flair to South Street Spring Festival BY ANDREA CANTOR
I
f the inevitable “how was your weekendâ€? question was met with “eh, boring,â€? then you clearly were not on South Street over the weekend. The South Street HeadHouse District was booming–and boozing–with festivities on Saturday, May 5. Set to the backdrop of the Mexican holiday Cinco de Mayo, the South Street Spring Festival and Brauhaus Schmitz’s Maifest was ďŹ lled with food and drink. But topping it all off was the over-20 local acts at three stage locales–two being with the Spring Street Festival and the other with Maifest. PW caught up with Vanderlyle, Thee Idea Men and Bazmati Vice to talk about performing at the festival and the Philadelphia music scene.
the promising band is still deďŹ ning its sound. Thus far, they have released a couple of songs, including their recent single “Breaking Throughâ€? on Itunes, Spotify and Google Play. Fronted by singer keyboardist Matt Fell, the band is comprised of bassist and vocalist Alex DeLuccia, guitarist and vocalist Kyle Ennis, guitarist John Wiater, and drummer Niko Metricarti. PW caught up with the band after the set, including Jon Urban who ďŹ lled in for DeLuccia.
PW: Have you played at South Street Spring Festival before or is this your first time?
Fell: No, ďŹ rst time. We did Second Street last year.
I just overheard you getting an offer to play Second Street Festival this year at Schmidt’s at the Piazza. Is that correct? All: Yeah. Metricarti: DVT Entertainment books bands for South Street Spring Festival and Second Street Festival.
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Jurasek: Drink tequila. Raspanti: Yeah, it's Cinco de Mayo. We are going to get drunk. Check out Thee Idea Men at Boot & Saddle on May 15 and at Orleib’s on June 8. For more information on The Idea Men: theeideamenmusic.com Q
Fell: Watch more music, eat food and drink. Urban: Get a drink or 12. Fell: It's Cinco de Mayo! Vanderlyle will be opening for California experimental-pop duo The Lagoons at Boot & Saddle on June 27. For more information on Vanderlyle, check out their page: vanderlyle.us Q
Fell: We were roaming around trying to get food before the show and there's so much going on. It's great. Like all the different food places and artists. We saw a New Orleans brass band down towards 8th Street, great festival.
Bazmati Vice On top of the usual instrumental suspects,
Matt, you were really rocking those keyboards there. What was going through your mind on stage? Fell: I started bleeding at one point. Ennis: Some lady just came up and gave [a bandaid] to him while we were on stage. Urban: There was a song where he was playing tambourine and he played the hell out of it.
Is that a frog on the bandaid? Fell: Yeah, there's like a monkey and a frog on it, some other animals. Urban: Anyway, it was a mom, and it came from a stroller, so you know it's good. Fell: As to what I was thinking, I'm just trying to enjoy myself. I think that's the best part about my music is just having fun and sharing it with your friends.
Thee Idea Men Relatively more seasoned, Thee Idea Men
Fell: I love it. There's so many different types of music happening, so many different bands, and everyone wants to play with each other. It's just like a nice neighborhood feeling
brought some bluesy-rock avor to the 2nd Street Stage. On the Philly music circuit since 2012, the four-men group have released four albums. Having received their start at The Legendary Dobbs that closed in 2015, guitar vocalists Matthew Jurasek and Matt Raspanti marveled to PW at South Street’s ability to keep the Philly indie-music scene alive. Jurasek: It's cool having local Philly bands playing here on South Street. [It's] nice to play and support what they are doing here, and the smell of awesome food is a really good drawing point as well.
Metricarti: There is, and I think it is because there's so many good venues and so many good small venues for bands to play when you're starting out that you can get shows, play on good bills and meet other bands. Urban: I like that you can make and maintain those connections by making friends
Jurasek: It's awesome. A lot of people say that there's not much going on here, but there's a shit ton going on here. It's really been incredible to see some of the bands come out in Philly, like our friends Vexxed just released a record, "Rare Mp3." Raspanti: It's got a great blend of styles that you don't alway get in a lot of other places. Other places are too focused on one type of music, but Philly's got that ultra-mix. It's real eclectic.
PW: So as an up-and-comer band, would you then say that there is a lot of opportunity to perform at venues and at festivals, such as the Spring Festival?
nered some well-deserved attention at the fest on 2nd Street Stage. Formed in Fall 2016,
What are you going to now that you’re done with your set?
What are you going to do when you are done performing?
So what do you think about today’s festivities?
PW: And what do you think about the Philly music scene?
Vanderlyle Local indie-rock group Vanderlyle gar-
with other bands. And so it is really a scene or more of a community. Ennis: We love bands we form relationships with and then we become each other's go-tos when we're trying to book shows and ďŹ nd other bands to split bills. There's a few bands that we have relationships with where they have taken us under our wing or viceversa. It's nice to see the same faces again.
What is so great about Philly for music?
throw in some mandolin and mandola and you got Basmati Rice–sorry, Bazmanti Vice! The eclectic band ďŹ rst met in 2013 at Haverford College. Based in Northeast Philly, the they have made their music rounds in Fishtown and are preparing to release their new album “Riseâ€? sometime this month. After a stirring set, which included a woman with a box ďŹ lled with candy balanced on her head randomly crashing the stage–go ďŹ gure–PW was able to get a few moments with bassist John Kerber at the 5th Street Stage.
It seems like you have a lot of different influences. So how would you define your sound? Kerber: It's kind of punk rock, but it has a bit of jazz. It's kind of all over the place.
And is this your first year at the South Street Spring Festival? Kerber: It's our ďŹ rst year. We played the Liberty Fest last year.
PW: How did you like playing today?
Kerber: It was awesome, it's so cool to see the whole place packed and the whole street shut down.
How do you think this festival highlight the Philly music community? Kerber: It's a lot of fun. We've had a great time and met a bunch of awesome bands... Everyone's here to just have a good time so it’s great. Catch the Bazmanti Vice live on July 27 at the Ardmore Music Hall. For more about the band: bazmativice.com Q
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NEWS
YOU AND A GUEST ARE INVITED TO A SPECIAL ADVANCE SCREENING
IMAGE: PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY FILE PHOTO
Those who hadn’t already denounced the comic icon have come out of the woodwork since his conviction.
Cosby dethroned
From pulling his sitcom reruns to revoking honorary degrees, institutions are racing to distance themselves from the disgraced comedian BY MAX MARIN
T
TUESDAY, MAY 15TH 7:00PM UA KING OF PRUSSIA 16 To enter to win an admit-two pass, visit philadelphiawveekly.com/contests NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. SEATING IS FIRST-COME, FIRST-SERVED AND CANNOT BE GUARANTEED. THEATRE IS OVERBOOKED TO ENSURE CAPACITY. YOU MUST BE 17 YEARS OLD TO ENTER CONTEST. ALL FEDERAL, STATE AND LOCAL REGULATIONS APPLY. A RECIPIENT OF TICKETS ASSUMES ANY AND ALL RISKS RELATED TO USE OF THE TICKET, AND ACCEPTS ANY RESTRICTIONS REQUIRED BY TICKET PROVIDER. PARAMOUNT PICTURES, PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY AND THEIR AFFILIATES ACCEPT NO RESPONSIBILITY OR LIABILITY IN CONNECTION WITH ANY LOSS OR ACCIDENT INCURRED IN CONNECTION WITH USE OF A PRIZE. TICKETS CANNOT BE EXCHANGED, TRANSFERRED OR REDEEMED FOR CASH, IN WHOLE OR IN PART. WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE IF, FOR ANY REASON, RECIPIENT IS UNABLE TO USE HIS/ HER TICKET IN WHOLE OR IN PART. ALL FEDERAL AND LOCAL TAXES ARE THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE WINNER. VOID WHERE PROHIBITED BY LAW. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. PARTICIPATING SPONSORS, THEIR EMPLOYEES AND FAMILY MEMBERS AND THEIR AGENCIES ARE NOT ELIGIBLE.
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he denunciations keep coming in the wake of Bill Cosby’s conviction on sexual assault charges last month. All told, dozens of universities, Hollywood icons and other institutions have now revoked degrees, rescinded honors and cut all ties with the disgraced comedian. On Thursday, May 3, Cosby lost his Marian Anderson Award. A Philadelphia-based board that bestows the honor to artists with wide-reaching cultural inuence announced its decision May 3 to formally revoke Cosby’s 2010 recognition. His proďŹ le has since been scrubbed from the honoree list on the award’s website. “The decision to rescind was made out of respect for the legacy of Marian Anderson, the other artists we have honored and will honor in the future, and the students who beneďŹ t from the organization's Young Artist Study Grant program,â€? the Board of the Marian Anderson Award wrote in a statement. Of higher proďŹ le, nearly a dozen universities that awarded Cosby honorary degrees have since stripped him of those recognitions. Yale University revoked the honorary degree it granted Cosby – a ďŹ rst in the Ivy League institution’s 300-year history. Ditto for Carnegie Mellon University, Wesleyan University, Johns Hopkins University,
SUNY, University of North Carolina – even Temple, Cosby’s most ardent defender in North Philadelphia, has shed its ties to the disgraced comedian in the wake of the Montgomery County jury’s ruling on April 26. Cosby’s television legacy continues to dry up as well. “Cosby Showâ€? reruns have been pulled from even the most ardent holdout networks. According to media reports, Amazon remains one of the few venues to still carry the 1980s sitcom. But the hand-washing began years ago for other institutions. Numerous universities, TV stations and groups severed their ties with Cosby after Andrea Constand ďŹ rst ďŹ led criminal charges in 2015. While that case ultimately ended with a mistrial, the charges were sufďŹ cient evidence for Drexel, Brown, Fordham, Tufts and other universities to revoke their honorary degrees. Even Drexel University backtracked at the time, while Temple stood by their most prized alum. After his conviction, Temple did eventually strip Cosby of the honorary doctorate. The 80-year-old celebrity faces up to 10 years in prison for each of the three counts of indecent assault. He remains out on $1 million bail, wearing an electronic-monitoring bracelet at his Cheltenham home. His sentencing with Judge Steven O'Neill will be scheduled for later this year. Q TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN
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FEATURE delphia? When I toured Nas and Lauryn Hill in the fall, we did the show in Camden, but we stayed in Philadelphia. We went to Monk’s – they had great frog legs.
You eat frog legs? I’ve never had those. Are they good? I mean, you fry most things and they get on the same level.
That’s true.
s In advance of his Philly show, PW swan dives inside the intrepid mind of comic Hannibal Buress SARAH ROSE ETTER
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hen I ask Hannibal Buress what he’s up to today, he starts telling me about cars. “I’m ďŹ lming a commercial tomorrow for Turo,â€? he says. “It’s like an AirBNB for cars. You can rent anything from a Prius to a Bentley.â€?
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“What about a DeLorean?â€? I ask. “Guess what? That’s what we’re shooting in tomorrow,â€? he says. From his wildly successful Netix special to his podcast, which Turo sponsors, Buress has been churning out gut-busting jokes at a rapid-ďŹ re pace. And with his new blockbuster “Tagâ€? coming out next month, it’s hard to believe he sleeps. During his latest Netix special, “Comedy Camisado,â€? Buress delivered a smart, blistering set that felt like a comedian in his prime – his tone, and topics are so distinct that his jokes simply couldn’t be delivered by anyone else. There’s a slyness to his comedy – everyday situations become hysterical as he builds his faux outrage up into a crescendo around them. He’s also the comedian you’d most want
to hang out with – his routines have the ability to make you feel like you’re in on the joke. He’s able to be calm and ridiculous at the same time, outrageous without being disgusting. There’s a sensibility and timing to each of his sets that belies a sophisticated mind at work behind all the bits. Buress will bring his latest set of jokes to Merriam Theater on May 19. I caught up with him to ďŹ nd out more about his constant touring, his podcast, and where he plans to hit up ďŹ rst on his stop to the City of Brotherly Love.
In Vanity Fair, you mentioned that you love being on the road because you develop relationships with the cities you go to frequently. So what do you do when you come to Phila-
We also went to this comedy spot – a small spot on Sansom. There’s a comedy night on Thursdays upstairs.
Are you thinking of Helium? No, it’s not a full-time comedy club, it’s a showcase. The Raven. It’s the Raven Lounge.
I’ve never been there, actually. Oh, then you must not be from Philly.
Come on! I’ve lived in Philly for 10 years. Right, right. But you don’t know the spots!
Haha. Alright, alright, back to the questions. What kind of show are you bringing this time around? What can the people of Philadelphia expect from you, Hannibal Buress? It’s tough to convey the gravity of the show via the print medium. But it’s mostly about tentacle porn. I feel like most subjects have been covered by other comedians – politics, everyone talks about politics. Relationships, it’s been covered. Having kids, sports, been talked about. Observational, behavior stuff, dogs vs. cats, airplanes, drinking, partying, drugs, music. All these things have been covered. So I met with my team and we just tried to ďŹ gure out a new place to go. We needed a new topic to delve into heavily in the comedy space, and we settled on tentacle porn.
You’re still innovating. I’m trying.
On “Comedy Camisado,â€? there’s a really good crescendo to how the jokes work. It’s consistently funny, but it keeps building up to these big jokes, these belly laughs. Do you think about that before a set or does it happen because of how the audience responds? I just try to do good bits. You do a bunch of bits, and you cut out the stuff that might not work. For the Netix special, we edited the pieces so it owed more smoothly. But I always try to have a handful of bits that are big set pieces.
Like the bit about checking into a hotel without an ID? Yes, that’s deďŹ nitely one of them. Then I do a few other longer bits and ďŹ ll in the spaces around that. I’m going to ďŹ lm this one soon. I’ll probably ďŹ lm in September on my own, and then see who wants it.
Do you ever think how vulnerable your acts can be? It’s sort of intimate how your bits work. In some ways, I feel like I know you more than my friends because of how honest you are about certain scenes in your life. There are aspects of that. I feel like my podcast has the potential to expose more of my personal life
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FEATURE than the standup. That’s why I don’t record it that often, actually. We’ll record ďŹ ve or six episodes over the course of a few days and use that as a backlog. If we were recording once a week, I’d end up digging into my personal life more. Some comedians go all out and use everything in their lives as material – and I enjoy watching them. But it’s a personal choice.
True. There’s a very specific type of comedian who goes super intimate. You’re toeing a bit of a different line. I still do dig into certain situations about my life, but I only mine my personal life for material to a certain extent.
You work pretty hard on your podcast, it sounds like. We have bursts of effort. We do a lot of small clips to reel people in. I don’t assume people want to listen to an hour and a half of something. But we don’t put it out every week because our editing process is so labored and not at all efďŹ cient. We don’t have that many sponsors because we put out one episode every three weeks or so. Most sponsors don’t want to dump their money into an erratic production.
Yeah, but you have a lot going on! You have a new movie coming out, too. We’re supposed to talk about that. Tell me about your movie “Tag.� I do have a new movie coming out. I tried to get them to change the title to “Tag! Tag! Tag!�
Why? I thought if we’re going to call it “Tag,� we might as well commit. We might as well lean into it. It’s more fun if you say it three times, especially a word with one syllable. Tag! Tag! Tag!
It’s a pretty stacked lineup for that movie. Was it fun to shoot? It was fun, you know – we shot the shit, it was a lot of improv. It was loose. But it’s still not coming out for a month. I could die before this movie comes out.
You’re not going to die, relax! I’m relaxed! But between pre-production to shooting it to when the movie ďŹ nally releases‌it just feels too long to me. Can we just get this shit out, please? If I’m dead, I won’t be able to see this movie with a crowd.
You won’t be able to shove it in the faces of everyone who doubted you before you got famous. Nah, I don’t think about that. I tune that out. The positive and the negative, I tune it out.
ple say. The internet is a lot of noise. It’s too much, it’s way too much noise.
Yeah, I’m sure it’s very different when you have 80 million followers. I don’t have 80 million!
I was just ball-parking. It can be distracting.
How do you handle that? Do you hire someone to take care of it? I did! I did recently. I can’t straight up delete [social media] because I have to post my live shows. But you know, I just end up veering off into weird internet wormholes. Someone posts a tweet, then I click a link, and suddenly I’m reading comments from a dumb meme that Snoop Dogg posted and I’m watching people argue. It’s only been a week, but I can feel the difference. I feel so much more clarity and less noise in my brain. It’s nice not to have to see everything Trump is doing in real time. I don’t need to know every comment Trump makes in real time.
Absolutely. It’s an insane news cycle. My publicist was on the phone with me the other day and was like, “Did you see this crazy shit Kanye has been doing?!� and I said, “Absolutely not.�
That’s beautiful. It was exciting to ďŹ nd out from someone on the phone after it happened instead of in real time. And I’ve been coming up with better ideas and shit! I’ve been working out more, too. That’s separate, but it’s true.
You have been talking about getting healthier‌ I’m going to be ripped by the time I’m in Philly.
Oh really? Not ripped, but my arms will look great. My arms and chest are going to look great. The gut is a different story.
I’ll make sure to include that in the article. I have another question. That’s what this is all about.
Were you funny your whole life? Funny is subjective.
You know what I mean. I think so. I think I was funny my whole life. I do remember at one point, when I was young, being at the store with my dad. He said something to me, and then I said something smartass back to him. I was 5 or 6 maybe. I remember looking at whoever was around us in the store to see if they had a reaction to me being funny. And my dad was yelling at me like, “Why are you looking at them?�
That was your first audience.
That sounds very existential. No good, no bad.
I was playing to the camera, but the camera wasn’t even there yet. Q
I just mean it in terms of what other peo-
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Hannibal Buress | May 19, 8pm. $30-60. The Merriam Theater, 250 S. Broad St. kimmelcenter.org/events-and-tickets
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APPEARING SATURDAY, MAY 19TH
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WEDNESDAY, MAY 9 MUSIC
table for everyone, no matter what. | 6-7pm. Free. Church of St. Matin-in-the-Fields, 8000 Saint Martins Lane. stmartinec.org/community_engagement/supper/
DRINKS
Parks on Tap: Campbell Square
Iron Maidens: Female Iron Maiden Tribute
Metalheads, get ready to thrash and bash to a night of music intensity. Get over hump day with the all-female Iron Maiden tribute band. Live Evil: Dio Tribute will also be taking the stage. | 9pm. $15. The Foundry, 29 E. Allen St. thefillmorephilly.com/EventDe tail?tmeventid=02005354144EA74E&offer id=61687
For brews and views, come for a drink – or two, or three – in Campbell Square. Established in the late-1800s as Allegheny Square, and then renamed in 1959 as Campbell Square, this charming passive park remains the central public gathering place for the community. Stop by the traveling beer garden all week long. | 5-10pm. Free. Campbell Square, 2535 E. Allegheny Ave. Parksontap.Com
MOTHER’S DAY
COMEDY
Mother’s Day Succulent Workshop
the scene
What to do in & around the city
Opening Weekend at the Delaware River Waterfront
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ave a fun-weekend overload and check out all the happenings at the Delaware River Waterfront. Swing into Mother’s Day Weekend and onto some hammocks with the reopening of Spruce Street Harbor Park. Univest Bank and Trust Co. will kick off the 2018 season with Univestival, a three-day festival of live music, craft stations and prizes. Univestival is just the icing on the cake. Once again, visitors will be able to take in the park’s magical atmosphere. The pop-up Philly feature will enchant spectators with handmade hammocks, hanging LED lights and oating gardens. Visitors can walk the waterfront boardwalk, play classic games, eat at one of the many surrounding restaurants and grab a drink at the beer garden. But that’s not all! Shop ‘til you drop at the Great Plaza’s Art Star Craft Bazaar. Head on over to the Blue Cross RiverRink Summerfest for the full Midway before its ofďŹ cial opening on May 24. May 11–13. Times vary. Free. Locations vary at the Delaware River Front. delawareriverwaterfront.com/events/great-plaza-at-penn-s-landing/opening-weekend
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– ANDREA CANTOR | @ANDREAJCANTOR
Teachers Relief Live!
Being a teacher is so hard it’s not funny – well, it’s kind of funny. The Fund for the School District of Philadelphia presents “Teachers Relief Live!� The night will star three comics who will school you on all things funny: Hank Denson, J Bliss and TuRae. A portion of all tickets sold will be donated to the fund for the School District of Philadelphia. | 8pm. $20. Punchline Philly, 33 E. Laurel St. punchlinephilly.com/EventDeta il?tmeventid=0200547ED1D5C2D5&offer id=80355
FOOD
What better way to celebrate Mother’s Day than by making her a plant grandma? Make your own plant baby in this workshop that includes a handmade ceramic succulent planter and everything you need to create your succulent arrangement. Held just days before Mother’s Day, feel free to bring your mom to the workshop. | 7-8:30pm. $20, advance. $25, door. The Schmidt’s Commons, 1001 N. 2nd St. eventbee.com/v/buckscountyflowers/event?eid=155263475#/tickets
THURSDAY, MAY 10 FITNESS
Yoga at Kendrick Rec.
Namaste! Relax and ďŹ nd your zen. Join Roots2Rise for this weekly yoga class. Perfect for all levels, mats are available to use. | 6:307:30pm. $5. Kendrick Recreation Center, 5800 Ridge Ave. roots2rise.org/
FESTIVAL
The 2018 Rittenhouse Row Spring Festival Preview Party Supper at St. Martin’s
Come ready to dig in at this free, homecooked meal for the whole community. All are invited to a meal that brings neighbors together and allows families to take a break and eat a healthy meal. There is room at the
Join Rittenhouse Row for the 2018 Spring Festival Preview Party presented by Capital One, featuring cuisine from Rittenhouse Row’s best restaurants, cocktails from their best bartenders, informal modeling of spring trends from Rittenhouse Row member boutiques and salons, and a silent auction with Rittenhouse Row experiences and merchan-
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IN THE SUPERIOR COURT OF THE VIRGIN ISLANDS DIVISION OF ST. THOMAS AND ST. JOHN -----------
SUMMONS TO: Aja Reynolds 3136 W Diamond St. Apt. A Philadelphia, PA 19121 MARCUS REYNOLDS vs. AJA REYNOLDS Family No. ST-16-DI-172 Action for Divorce --------Pursuant to the Court’s Order dated March 26, 2018 authorizing service by publication, within the time limited by law, thirty (30) days from the last date of service by publication, you are required to appear at the above Court to DQVZHU D 3HWLWLRQ IRU 'LYRUFH ¿OHG against you in this action. If you fail to appear or answer, judgment by default will be granted against you as prayed for in the Petition. ESTRELLA GEORGE Clerk of the Court Marcus Reynolds, Pro Se P.O. Box 1433 St. Thomas, VI 00804
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dise. | 7-9:30pm. $75. Hyatt at the Bellevue, 200 S. Broad St. rittrow.ticketleap.com/ the-2018-rittenhouse-row-spring-festivalpreview-party/
MUSIC
Elwes. | 8pm. $13. $9, PFS members. Prince Theater, 1412 Chestnut St. filmadelphia.org/
FRIDAY, MAY 11 MUSIC
Jessie Ware
Let’s get down with the sultry sounds of Jessie Ware promoting her latest album “Glasshouse.� The album features songs such as “Alone� and “Sam.� Have some fun this Thursday, and check out the English singersongwriter live. | 8pm. $20. TLA, 334 South St. venue.tlaphilly.com/EventDetail?tmeven tid=02005457E6A8D2D7&offerid=0
THEATER
‘Our Few and Evil Days’
Daughter brings home beau to meet the parents. It’s all so normal, but this perfect family photo is about to slip out of the frame. Elements of Gothic horror poke sharply into this story of unsettling domesticity as obsession, guilt and agony reveal devotion’s dark side. With its performance run ending on Sunday, make sure to catch one of Inis Nua Theater Company’s remaining shows of “Our Few and Evil Days.� | 7pm. $25. The Proscenium Theatre at The Drake, 302 S. Hicks St. inisnuatheatre.secure.force.com/ ticket/#details_a0S37000000jF6VEAU
GAMES
Fu Manchu
Start the weekend off right with American stoner rock band Fu Manchu. Named after the ďŹ ctional evil villain, the Southern California group has been kicking out the jams since 1985. Tap into your darker side with “Clone of the Universe,â€? Fu Manchu’s most recent EP. | 9pm. $14-$16. Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St. ticketfly.com/purchase/ event/1604743?utm_medium=bks
FESTIVAL
Philadelphia Taco Festival
Tacos, tacos and more tacos! Get your taco on through Sunday at this delicious festival. Featuring some of the area’s best restaurants and food trucks, dig into $3 taco creations and taco eating contests. To complement your tacos, head on over to the tequila expo area and margarita bar! Get into the taco spirit with live entertainment. Check out the VIP packages for early entry and extras to top off your taco extravaganza. | 1-6pm. $14.99. SugarHouse Casino, 1001 N. Delaware Ave. upcomingevents.com/e/philadelphia-taco-festival-33768/
ART
117th Annual Student Exhibition Public Opening
The 117th Annual Student Exhibition features works by Pennsylvania Academy of Fine Arts’ BFA students, third- and fourth-year certiďŹ cate program students and Master of Fine Arts candidates, showcasing a range of artistic styles and projects. This long-standing tradition offers students the opportunity to curate, install and sell their own works in PAFA’s beautiful museum galleries. | 5-8pm. Free. PAFA, 118-128 N. Broad St. pafa.org/ ase
GARDENS
National Public Gardens Day
In honor of National Public Gardens Day, enjoy free admission to Morris Arboretum all day. Take in the beauty of botany at its ďŹ nest. Smell the fragrant plants, and soak in the spring weather. | 10-4pm. Free. Morris Arboretum at University of Penn, 100 E. Northwestern Ave. morrisarboretum.org
SATURDAY, MAY 12 SCIENCE
NIGHTLIFE
CAUSES
Throwback Thursday Quizzo & Movie: ‘The Princess Bride’!
Want a night of all things “Princess Brideâ€?? “As you wish!â€? Answer questions about the beloved 1987 romance and watch the ďŹ lm that gives you all the feels. Sponsored by the Kimmel Center for the Performing Arts, the ďŹ rst-place team will get a behind-the-scenes look at life on and off the set of the classic ďŹ lm, two VIP Meet & Greet tickets to “The Princess Bride: An Inconceivable Evening with Cary Elwesâ€? on June 15 at the Kimmel Center, premium seating and a photo op with
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‘Party at the Pen: The Masquerade’ Pints for Pups
Come out for a “Pints for Pupsâ€? party! Your ticket includes a full buffet, draft beer and DJ! Don’t let the “ruffâ€? day at work stop you from having a barking good time and helping a good cause. Proceeds beneďŹ t “Mums and Muttsâ€? and its mission to help save pets’ lives in rescues and shelters! | $25$30. 7-11pm. Second Street Irish Society, 1937 S. 3rd St. secondstreetirishsociety.org
Back by popular demand, Terror Behind the Wall’s “Party at the Pen: The Masquerade� will return through Saturday at Eastern State Penitentiary. Expect luscious libations, mind-blowing beats and intriguing adventures. Gates will open, cell doors close. Are you daring enough to join this soiree of a lifetime? Dance. Drink. Explore. | 9pm. $79. Eastern State Penitentiary, 22nd Street and Fairmount Avenue. easternstate.org/halloween/party-pen-masquerade
Camp-In at The Franklin Institute
Do your kids like visiting The Franklin Institute during the day? Then they’ll love spending a whole night at the museum! Pack your sleeping bags and prepare for an evening jam-packed with live science shows, hands-on workshops, stargazing in the rooftop observatory, and time to explore all 11 permanent exhibits. Where else can you sleep next to a Giant Heart or a 350-ton locomotive? | 6:15pm-9:30am. $59.50. $39.50, members. Franklin Institute, 222 N. 20th St. fi.edu/ camp-in
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$10, child. Kendrick Recreation Center, 5800 Ridge Ave. roxboroughmothersdaywalk. wordpress.com
MOTHER’S DAY
Mother’s Day Tea Cocktails
Treat your mom to a twist on afternoon tea. Make three tea cocktails. Pair your creation with classic tea sandwiches and desserts as well as local cheeses. | 11:30am-1:30pm. $30. Alchemist Society, 1100 N. Front St. eventbrite.com/e/mothers-day-tea-cocktails-tickets-43912400171?aff=efbeventtix
MOTHER’S DAY
Mother’s Day Brunch
Celebrate Mother’s Day with all of the amazing moms from across the animal kingdom! Enjoy a delicious unlimited brunch buffet, meet your favorite animals and learn from the experts who care for them. Visit PECO Primate Reserve to meet gorilla moms Kira and Honi, and their toddlers Amani and Ajabu as they swing, stroll and explore their exhibits. | 9:30am, 11:30am, and 1:30pm. Prices vary. Philadelphia Zoo, 3400 W. Girard Ave. philadelphiazoo.org/Explore/Upcoming-Events/Mother-s-Day-Brunch.htm
MOTHER’S DAY
Mother’s Day Tour of Evil Genius Brewery
MUSIC
Marshmello
It’s the weekend, so let’s celebrate! Party it out to “Joytime� DJ Marshmello. Lose yourself to the electronic dance music from the man in the marshmallow mask. | 5pm. Resale prices vary. The Festival Pier at Penn’s Landing, Columbus Boulevard and Spring Garden Street. festivalpierphilly.com
FOOD
Worldwide Vegan Bake Sale
It’s time for the second annual Philly Vegan Lady Gang’s participation in the Worldwide Vegan Bake Sale. Last year, they raised more than $1,000 for Woodstock Farm Sanctuary. This year, they are keeping it local and plan to raise even more for the Animal Care & Control Team. It’s the day before Mother’s Day, so come buy your mom lots of vegan sweet treats. | 1-4pm. Free. Tattooed Mom, 530 South St. tattooedmomphilly.com/event/ philly-vegan-lady-gang-presents-worldwide-vegan-bake-sale/
KIDďšşFRIENDLY
Storybook Weekend
Listen to stories read by special guests and local authors every 30 minutes! The weekend will be jam-packed with live music, makeand-take crafts, face painting, balloon art and more. | 11am-3pm. Free. Sister Cities Park, 18th and Benjamin Franklin Parkway. centercityphila.org/parks/events/storybookweekend2018
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SUNDAY, MAY 13 COMEDY
Maria Bamford
Creator and star of “Maria Bamford: the special special special� and cult hit web series “The Maria Bamford Show,� “Rolling Stone� named Maria Bamford one of its 50 Funniest People. Winner of the 2014 American Comedy Award for Best Club Comic, Bamford has had recurring roles on the reboot of “Arrested Development� and “Louie.� | 7:30pm. $25. Helium Comedy Club, 2031 Sansom St. philadelphia-heliumcomedy-com.seatengine. com/shows/78333
MOTHER’S DAY
17th Annual Roxborough Mother’s Day Walk/Run
Raise awareness about breast cancer this Mother’s Day. The proceeds of the walk/run will beneďŹ t Friends in Pink and Lisa’s Army. The day will also include rafes with a ton of amazing prizes. | 7-11am. $30-$35, adult.
Not sure what to do for mom on Mother’s Day? Take her on a tour of Evil Genius! Evil Genius will be hosting a private tour of the brewery for you and yo momma. Tour includes a ight of ďŹ ve exclusive Evil Genius beers, branded shaker pint glass and a Q&A opportunity at the end of the tour. | 1pm, 2pm. $40. Evil Genius Beer Company, 1727 N. Front St. evil-genius-beer-company.ticketleap.com/mothers-day-tour/
tions! Run a ďŹ ve-mile loop to the Delaware River and back through Old City. Pace and distance vary, so all levels are welcome. | 7pm. Free. William Way LGBT Community Center, 1315 Spruce St. phillyfr.org
KIDďšşFRIENDLY
Read to a therapy dog!
Nervous about reading? Bella the French Bulldog is a trained therapy dog who will help you out during one-on-one reading sessions by providing a judgment-free environment. This program is geared toward ages 6-12, but other children, such as younger siblings, are encouraged to participate as well. | 6pm. Free, registration required. Whitman Library, 200 Snyder Ave. libwww.freelibrary.org/calendar/event/76552
MOVIE
Movie Monday: ‘Back to the Future’
Hop on your skateboard or jump into your DeLorean for this futuristic throwback. Join Marty McFly and Doc as they try to ďŹ x the timeline. Dress as one of the 1985 ďŹ lm characters and get a free beer. The ďŹ lm starts at 8pm, but come before 7pm and get a free beer and play classic games. After the movie there will be trivia, prizes and rafes. Enjoy drink specials and food. | 6:30 doors open. $3. The Trocadero, 1003 Arch St. thetroc.com
MOVIE
MONDAY, MAY 14 ART
Pop Up Painting at Frankford Hall
Looking for a fun night to get creative and experimental? Bring your friends, your family, or a date and get cozy with some brushes and colors! Any donation amount will get you paper and all the materials you need to create a unique work. | 7pm. Donations vary. Any donation of $10 or more will get you a fresh, 8� x 10� stretched canvas, $15 for a 16� x 20�. Frankford Hall, 1210 Frankford Ave. facebook.com/events/1778582962200564/
FITNESS
Monday Evening Run
Keep up with those New Year’s resolu-
‘Heading Home’ PJFF CineMondays 2018 Closing Night Film
Closing out Philadelphia Jewish Film Festival’s 37th annual season with bases loaded, “head homeâ€? with Israel’s national baseball team. After years of defeat, Team Israel proves they are underdogs no longer, ďŹ nally ranking among the world’s best teams in 2017 and eligible to play in the World Baseball Classic. With their popular “Mensch on a Benchâ€?
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shows that nearly two-thirds of the public knows little or nothing about Lupus. As part of Lupus Awareness Month, celebrate World Lupus Day in Philadelphia. Bring awareness of the autoimmune disease and the people who suffer from it. Come together in solidarity. | Noon-2pm. Free. Thomas Paine Plaza, 401 JFK Blvd. lupus.org/tristate/pages/ lupus-awareness-month1
MUSIC
The Fratellis
Turn up this Tuesday with the Fratellis. The Scottish rock band recently released their ďŹ fth studio album, entitled “In Your Own Sweet Time.â€? Also performing will be Blood Red Shoes. | 8pm. $20. TLA, 334 South St. venue.tlaphilly. com/EventDetail ?tmeventid=020 0533707486DAD &offerid=0
mascot at their side, the teammates discover what it means to represent their homeland on the world stage. | 5:30pm, 8pm. $15-10. National Museum of American Jewish History, 101 South Independence Mall E. pjff.org/ heading-home-tale-team-israel/
DRINKS
Parks on Tap
$5. United by Blue, 205 Race St. unitedbyblue.ticketleap.com/women-for-a-sustainable-philadelphia-inaugural-gathering/
CARNIVAL
TUESDAY, MAY 15
points, and when and how to best use them. Prepare and sample recipes that promote health and account for cultural, environmental and social considerations. | 6-8pm. $15. Free Library of Philadelphia, 1901 Vine St. eventbrite.com/e/oils-and-fats-101-tickets-44769554944
WEDNESDAY, MAY 16
MUSIC
THEATER
Pay What You Can: ‘Fun Home’ Annual Family Carnival
The Kills
Slay the night with The Kills. Unwind after the long work day to the British-American indie rock band. Dream Wife will also be taking the stage.| 8:30pm. $27-$30. Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. utphilly.com/ event/1653349-kills-philadelphia/
Rides, games, funnel cake? Yep, it’s that time again! The carnival is back in town, and visitors of all ages will have a blast at the Annual Family Carnival, here until May 19. | 6:30-10pm. Free admission. St Anselm School, 12650 Dunks Ferry Road. pa-carnivals.com/2018/st-anselm-catholic-churchschool-carnival-2018-philadelphia-pa/
FOOD
For a night at the theater, watch the preview of Arden Theater Company’s “Fun Home.â€? Hailed as one of Broadway’s most original musicals and winner of ďŹ ve Tony Awards, “Fun Homeâ€? is a groundbreaking story inspired by Alison Bechdel’s best-selling graphic memoir. After the sudden death of her father, Alison sets out to unravel the many mysteries of her childhood growing up at the family funeral home in Central Pennsylvania. The show runs through June 17. | 7-10pm. Pay what you can. Arden Theater Company, 40 N. 2nd St. ardentheatre.org
CAUSES
NETWORK
Women for Sustainable Philadelphia Inaugural Gathering
Women for a Sustainable Philadelphia is a forum to encourage women to connect from different disciplines around a passion for impacting the current and future environmental, social and economic resilience of the Greater Philadelphia region. Meet with other likeminded women during this networking event. The night will include refreshments. | 6-8pm.
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Grab a beer at the traveling beer garden at Fernhill Park. Located in Germantown, Fernhill Park is a spacious, open ďŹ eld that’s perfect for friends, family and pets. This huge park is home to a playground, sports ďŹ elds and courts, and a pavilion that is great for barbecuing. There are plenty of trails for walking and exploring. Parking until May 20, make sure to enjoy a beverage before Parks on Tap zooms away to its next green space! | 5-10pm. Free. Fernhill Park, 333 W. Abbottsford Ave. Parksontap.com
FITNESS
Yoga Happy Hour
Sometimes you need yoga. Sometimes you need beer. Sometimes you need both! Join Diana from Dhyana Yoga as she goes through a Vinyasa ow to all of the top hits at Fishtown Hops! All you need is a mat. Cheers to that! | 6-7pm. Free, Fishtown Hops, 1001 N. Delaware Ave. fishtownhops.com
FITNESS
Spring Training: City Fit Girls Running Club
Grab the gal pals for an evening run. Each and every Wednesday, lace-up your running shoes for a 3-5 mile trek through Center City. City Fit Girls is an all-levels running and ďŹ tness community for women. | 6:30-7:30pm. Free. Dilworth Park, 1 S. 15th St. cityfitgirls. com/philadelphia/
Find more events at
Oils and Fats 101
Join chef Chris Paul and nutritionist LeighAnn Charles-Paul to learn the how and why of using common cooking fats and oils. This class will include an overview of fats and oils, their nutritional characteristics, smoke
2018 World Lupus Day Rally
Lupus is more pervasive and more severe than people think. Its impact often goes unnoticed by the general public. In fact, research
PhillyWeekly.com Tell us about your upcoming events!
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SAVAGE LOVE
Pedestrian AF DAN SAVAGE
F
irst, let me say that I think you give excellent advice, even if it is a bit pedestrian at times. I have a small problem: Last fall, my penis bent up and to the left at an almost 90 degree angle. I know from Google that this is not an unusual problem. And at 59, I am thankful that things are working as well as they are. But I y gliders, and the relief system is a “Texas catheterâ€? with a drain line to outside the glider. I believe that the bending on my penis may be the result of trauma caused by removing the catheter. In your many years of dealing with penis problems – I know you are not a urologist, but still – have you run across problems of a similar nature? Is there a way to remove adhesive from the penis that will not cause trauma? Gliding season will be starting soon, and I dread using the same system if it will cause more damage. My partner is an amazing woman – 70, by the way, and by far the best partner I have ever had (oh, my brethren, do not look only to youth!) – but I dread further damaging my member. – Hanging Under Nice Glider
First, let me say thank you for the qualiďŹ ed compliment – you sure know how to atter a girl – and I’ll try to keep my trademark excellent-if-pedestrian advice coming, HUNG. Also, you’re right, I’m not a urologist. But Dr. Keith Newman is. He’s also a fellow of the American College of Surgeons and my go-to guy for dick-related medical questions. “It is not likely that HUNG’s drainage system caused the problem,â€? said Dr. Newman. “His condition sounds like Peyronie’s disease, a possibly autoimmune disease thought to be related to microtrauma, though some penile fractures may result in similar deformity.â€? Men with Peyronie’s disease come down with, well, bent dicks. Sometimes the bend is slight and doesn’t interfere with reasonable penile functions. Sometimes the bend is severe enough to make erections painful and intercourse impossible. “Most sufferers will return to within 10 to 20 percent of their baseline curvature within two years without intervention,â€? said Dr. Newman. “Thus, it is considered best to defer therapy until such time has elapsed. Ninety
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degrees is quite a big bend, however, and less likely to resolve spontaneously, but its still worth waiting.â€? If your big bend doesn’t resolve spontaneously, HUNG, there are treatment options. “The only real therapies are Xiaex injections and surgical repair,â€? said Dr. Newman. “The former is not approved for patients less than two years from diagnosis or with less than 35 degrees of curvature. The latter is fraught with increased complication rates due to scarring so near the tip. Both can straighten the penis, but at a cost of length in many cases. I’m a 37-year-old male. I’ve been with my wife for 15 years. I know that passion transitions in a long-term relationship, but I’m having a hard time ďŹ nishing lately. Yes, I’m on SSRIs – antidepressants – but that has only exacerbated the issue. We all know that a lot of people who own a vagina enjoy foreplay to help the orgasms along. Will foreplay help people who own a penis get to the moment faster? I’m pretty sure I know the answer, and I ďŹ gured you’re the one to ask what the best foreplay options are because your sexual knowledge is vast and you regularly deal with two penises at a time. As someone who pleasures a penis and who has a penis that is pleasured, what is the best preparation to get guys off before the insertion happens?
Hookups =
– Seeking Weapons Of Male Penile Satisfaction
Foreplay isn’t just for vaginas, SWOMPS! Penises have nerve endings all over their bodies – inside ’em, too – and while many younger men don’t require much in the way of foreplay, older men and/or men taking SSRIs often beneďŹ t from additional forms of stimulation both prior to intercourse and during intercourse. Like tit play. I know some men can’t go there because that tit-play shit – like feelings, musicals, sit-ups, and voting for women – could turn you gay. But if you’re up for it, SWOMPS, have the wife play with or even clamp your tits, and then shove a plug in your ass that stimulates your prostate while also remembering to engage what’s often called “the largest sex organâ€?: your brainz. Talk dirty to each other! If you’re already proďŹ cient at JV dirty talk – telling ’em what you’re about to do (“I’m going to fuck the shit out of youâ€?), telling ’em what you’re doing (“I’m fucking the shit out of youâ€?), telling ’em what you did (“I fucked the shit out of youâ€?) – move on to varsity dirty talk: Talk about your fantasies, awesome experiences you’ve had in the past, things you’d like to try or try again with your partner. To get your dick there – to push past those SSRIs – ďŹ re on all cylinders (tits, hole, brain, mouth, and cock) before and during insertion.
Visit www.squirt.org to hook up today
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CARPENTERS, PAINTERS & Masons. Must be experienced. Call 215-908-3241 DRIVER NEEDED - F/T Apply in person, Between 11am-3pm. 911 Christian St. No experience necessary. '5,9(56 $OO7KUHH V /X[XU\ 6HGDQ 7D[LFDE ORRNLQJ IRU SURIHV VLRQDO GULYHUV +LJK LQFRPH 6HW \RXU RZQ KUV 3OHDVH FDOO 0 ) D S
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Exp. waitstaff & dish room. Please call 267-640-4441 F/T Entry Level Position in Medical Office Long term commitment Will train. Must have car. Spanish speaking a plus (215) 431-0452
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Reqs: Bachelor’s degree in Math, Computer Engineering, Computer Science, Information Technology, Information Systems Engineering or foreign equivalent plus 5 years progressive experience in the job offered. Must have strong technical background and significant experience in building and managing software products geared towards the insurance industry as well as in program/product management in the insurance domain. Experience in SQL and PL/SQL source and Wynsure suite of products is also required.
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Technical Project Lead: Manage project execution to ensure adherence to budget, schedule, and scope; Develop or update project plans for IT projects including project objectives, technologies, systems, information specifications, schedules, funding, and staffing; Monitor or track project milestones and deliverables; Confer with project personnel to identify and resolve problems; Develop and manage work breakdown structure (WBS) of IT projects; Submit project deliverables, ensuring adherence to quality standards; Prepare project status reports by collecting, analyzing, and summarizing information and trends; Direct or coordinate activities of project personnel; Establish and execute project communication plans; Assign duties, responsibilities, and spans of authority to project personnel; Schedule and facilitate meetings related to IT projects; Initiate, review, or approve modifications to project plans and perform risk assessments to develop response strategies; Monitor performance of project team members, providing and documenting performance feedback; Identify need for initial or supplemental project resources. Promote interaction and cooperation between customers (internal / external) and the project teams; Participate, as required, in the preparation of preliminary analysis; coordinate all activities required for project approval; Plan, monitor and control the scope, the risks, the costs, the change requests, the outstanding issues, the human resources and the communications for all assigned projects.
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NOW HIRING `Mig Welders
Responsible for Welding metal parts with MIG Welding equipment as speciďŹ ed by layout, jigs, or prints s #OMPREHENSIVE BENElTS PACKAGE s #OMPETITIVE 7AGES s .O TRAVEL s 5NIFORMS FURNISHED s 3AFE WORK ENVIRONMENT
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Apply at www.wastequip.com under Careers. (ICKSTOWN 2OAD s %RIAL .* .EW "ROOKLYN 2OAD s 7ILLIAMSTOWN .* We are located about 30 minutes from South Philly or 35 to 40 minutes from Northeast Philly.
PHILADELPHIA CAREER FAIR Four Points by Sheraton Philadelphia Northeast 9461 Roosevelt Blvd , Philadelphia, PA 19114
FREE Admission!
Ref. #40394/29/44
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JOB FAIR Walk-Ins Welcome CDL A Exp’ed & New Grad Drivers. Local Home Daily Routes Saturday, 5/12/2018 10:00 am – 1:00 pm 900 Wheeler Way Langhorne, PA 19047 612-248-3060 www.drivedli.com
TOURISM & HOSPITALITY (T&H) EVENT SERVICE COORDINATOR
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EASTON COACH COMPANY IS HIRING CCT VAN DRIVERS AND SUPERVISORS NEW PHILADELPHIA OPERATION (GRAYS FERRY) - APPLY TODAY!
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Please email jobs@eastoncoach.com or call (610) 253-4055 ext. 1002. Easton Coach Company is an Equal Opportunity Employer And a Drug Free workplace
Tow Truck Driver Needed Phila., PA. Exp. necessary. 215-722-2111
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Multiple openings. Send resume/cover letter Attn: StĂŠphanie Overy Saulnier Stephanie.OverySaulnier@equisoft.com, Equisoft Inc., 1835 Market Street, Suite 2910, Philadelphia, PA 19103.
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Montparnasse 56 Philadelphia LLC., Philadelphia, PA seeks T&H Event Service Coordinator to Plan, coordinate and execute tourism and hospitality activities & events. Analyze visitors' tourism behavior. Plan and determine specific tourist event packages. Develop the details of different tourist programs and special events. Req.: BS in T&H Management or T&H related Event Management. 1.5 yr T&H Management exp. Ability to multitask, prioritize tasks, problem-solve, anticipate outcomes and plan for contingencies; Attn. to details, strong communication skills. Knowledge of Microsoft Office Suite & T&H related events in the area Apply by mail with resume and cover letter to: Ms. Jennifer Hesser Montparnasse 56 Philadelphia, LLC. 1650 Market Street, Suite 5700 Philadelphia, PA 19103 General Employment
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State of Vermont Superior Court Civil Division Windsor unit Docket # 56-2-18 Wrcv SUMMONS & ORDER FOR PUBLICATION THIS SUMMONS IS DIRECTED TO: David P. Corey aka David Phillip Corey YOU ARE BEING SUED. The Plaintiff has started a lawsuit against you. A copy of the Plaintiff’s Complaint against you is on file and may be obtained at the office of the clerk of this court, Windsor Unit, Civil Division, Vermont Superior Court, 12 The Green, Woodstock, Vermont. Do not throw this paper away. It is an official paper that affects your rights. PLAINTIFF’S CLAIM. Plaintiff’s claim is a Complaint in Foreclosure which alleges that you have breached the terms of a Promissory Note and Mortgage Deed dated November 1, 2007. Plaintiff’s action may effect your interest in the property described in the Land Records of the Town of Bethel at Volume 96, Page 106. The Complaint also seeks relief on the Promissory Note executed by you. A copy of the Complaint is on file and may be obtained at the Office of the Clerk of the Superior Court for the County of Windsor, State of Vermont. YOU MUST REPLY WITHIN 41 DAYS TO PROTECT YOUR RIGHTS. You must give or mail the Plaintiff a written response called an Answer within 41 days after the date on which this Summons was first published, which is June 5th, 2018. You must send a copy of your answer to the Plaintiff or the Plaintiff’s attorney, LORAINE L. HITE, Esq. of Bendett and McHugh, PC, located at 270 Farmington Avenue, Ste. 151, Farmington, CT 06032. You must also give or mail your Answer to the Court located at 12 The Green, Woodstock, Vermont. YOU MUST RESPOND TO EACH CLAIM. The Answer is your written response to the Plaintiff’s Complaint. In your Answer you must state whether you agree or disagree with each paragraph of the Complaint. If you believe the Plaintiff should not be given everything asked for in the Complaint, you must say so in your Answer. YOU WILL LOSE YOUR CASE IF YOU DO NOT GIVE YOUR WRITTEN ANSWER TO THE COURT. If you do not Answer within 41 days after the date on which this Summons was first published and file it with the Court, you will lose this case. You will not get to tell your side of the story, and the Court may decide against you and award the Plaintiff everything asked for in the complaint. YOU MUST MAKE ANY CLAIMS AGAINST THE PLAINTIFF IN YOUR REPLY. Your Answer must state any related legal claims you have against the Plaintiff. Your claims against the Plaintiff are called Counterclaims. If you do not make your Counterclaims in writing in your answer you may not be able to bring them up at all. Even if you have insurance and the insurance company will defend you, you must still file any Counterclaims you may have. LEGAL ASSISTANCE. You may wish to get legal help from a lawyer. If you cannot afford a lawyer, you should ask the court clerk for information about places where you can get free legal help. Even if you cannot get legal help, you must still give the court a written Answer to protect your rights or you may lose the case. ORDER The Affidavit duly filed in this action shows that service cannot be made with due diligence by any of the method provided in Rules 4(d)-(f), (k), or (l) of the Vermont Rules of Civil Procedure. Accordingly, it is ORDERED that service of the Summons set forth above shall be made upon the defendant, David P. Corey aka David Phillip Corey, by publication as provided in Rule[s] [4(d)(l) and] 4 (g) of those Rules. This order shall be published once a week for 3 weeks beginning on April 25, 2018 in the Philadelphia Weekly, a newspaper of the general circulation in Philadelphia County, Pennsylvania and a copy of this summons and order as published shall be mailed to the defendant David P. Corey aka David Phillip Corey, at P.O. Box 36, Bethel, VT 05032, the last known mailing address of Defendant. Dated at Woodstock Vermont this 23rd day of April 2018 Hon. Robert P. Gerety, Jr. Presiding Judge Windsor Unit, Civil Division
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Court of Common Pleas for the County of Philadelphia, April Term 2018 No. 1263 NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN that on the 19th day of April, 2018, the Petition for Change of Name, filed by Petitioner, Musuy Kukwikila, was filed in the above-named Court, praying for a decree to change her name to Antoinette Blossom. The Court has fixed June 1st, 2018, at 10:30 AM, in Courtroom 691, City Hall, Philadelphia, PA, as the time and place for the hearing of said Petition, when and where all persons interested may appear and show cause, if any they have, why the prayer of the said petition should not be granted.
Court of Common Pleas for the County of Philadelphia, March Term 2018 No. 2895. NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN that on the 10th day of April, 2018, the Petition for Change of Name, filed by Petitioner, Bianca Wombough, was filed in the above-named Court, praying for a decree to change her name to Bianca Wolford. The Court has fixed June 1st, 2018, at 9:30 AM, in Courtroom 691, City Hall, Philadelphia, PA, as the time and place for the hearing of said Petition, when and where all persons interested may appear and show cause, if any they have, why the prayer of the said petition should not be granted.
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Philadelphia’s ultimate guide for all things summer including, Concerts, Festivals, Arts, Nightlife, Movies, Camps, Travel and more! YOUR AD WILL REACH OVER 250,000 READERS IN PAPER AND ONLINE! RESERVE YOUR SPACE NOW! DEADLINE FOR SPACE RESERVATIONS: MAY 11, 2018 PUBLISHES: MAY 16, 2017
For more information or to reserve your space contact your sales representative or Deidre Simms at deidre@philadelphiaweekly.com
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REAL ESTATE
WEEKLY MORTGAGE RATES Presented by Prudential Bank
30YR Fixed Rate Mortgage
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For more information contact:
215.563.7400 | philadelphiaweekly.com
FEATURED OPEN HOUSES Open Houses for Saturday 5/12 Sunday 5/13 2H[O` 7H[YPJR HUK [OL *VU^H` ;LHT )LYRZOPYL /H[OH^H` /VTL :LY]PJLZ -V_ 9VHJO 9LHS[VYZ c
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Rates as of May 7, 2018 10:00 AM. *APR= Annual Percentage Rate. Rates subject to change daily (including same day). For real time rates, please call 215-755-1500. The rate you receive may be higher based on credit score, mortgage loan-to-value ratio and other loan factors. Please call for Jumbo Rates (above $453,100). Subject to credit approval. Property insurance required. Loan to values from 80% to 97% require PMI (Private Mortgage Insurance). Other costs and fees may apply. Monthly P&I payment of $1382.37 based on a $265,000.00 loan amount, 360-month term, assumed credit score of 740 & loan-to-value of 80%. *P&I= Principal and Interest. These payments do not include amounts for taxes and insurance premiums; actual payment will be greater. NMLS #518005
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ACCREDITED LUXURY HOME SPECIALIST Licensed in NJ & PA
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1834 West Oregon Avenue, Philadelphia, PA 19145-4725 www.psbanker.com
Rate 4.750% APR 4.785%
Cherry Hill/Ramsgate This well maintained, meticulous 4 bedroom, 3.5 Bath home has formal living & dining rm, family rm, 1st floor bonus room, Eat in Kitchen, beautifully updated master Bath, a walk out finished basement, 2 car garage and is nestled on a private lot. $474,900
Philadelphia/ Waterfront Square Spectacular views of The Delaware River and Skyline Of Center City Philadelphia! Corner unit with 2 Bedrooms, 2.5 Baths, updated Kitchen, Living Area, Dining Area, Laundry and Balcony. The kitchen has granite counter-tops, ceramic floors, center island, & newer stainless steel appliances Both bedrooms have private baths, HW flrs & plenty of closet space. The amenities include: 1 car parking, indoor pool, jacuzzi, gym, steam rooms, security entrance, 24 hour concierge, valet parking, community room and free shuttle transportation to center city. Realistically Priced at $599,000.
R E A L E S TAT E
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For more information contact: 215.563.7400
philadelphiaweekly.com WHAT TO DO | WHERE TO GO | WHERE TO LIVE | WHAT’S UP NEXT WHAT TO DO | WHERE TO GO | WHERE TO LIVE | WHAT’S UP NEXT
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The Damon Michels Team
610.668.3400
THE RIGHT PLACE.
“Specializing in MainLine & Center City� Damon Michels Damon@DamonMichels.com 275 Homes www.DamonMichels.com Sold in 2017
MAIN LINE SUBURBS
1320 Monk Rd, Gladwyne 5 Bed/ 8.2 Bath, 9,923 sq ft, Colonial, $3,850,000
NEW LISTINGS 1116 Tower Lane E, Penn Valley 6 Bed/4.1 Bath | 5,151 sq ft | Cape | $1,150,000 1359 Arbordale Rd, Wynnewood 5 Bed, 3.1 Bath | 2,381 sq ft | Colonial | $649,000 1119 W Old Wynnewood Rd, Wynnewood 4 Bed/2.1 Bath | 2,662 sq ft | Colonial | $635,000
JUST REDUCED 500 N Spring Mill Rd, Villanova 5 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 3,900 sq ft | Colonial | $949,000 139 Colwyn Ln, Bala Cynwyd 6 Bed/ 5 Bath | 3,800 sq ft | Cape | $869,000 1211 Mirabeau Ln, Gladwyne 7 Bed/ 8.3 Bath | 15,317 sq ft | Colonial | $3,950,000 1320 Monk Rd, Gladwyne 5 Bed/ 8.2 Bath | 9,923 sq ft | Colonial | $3,850,000 1461 Lanes End, Villanova 5 Bed/ 4.3 Bath | 7,322 sq ft | Colonial | $2,495,000 917 N Woodbine Ave, Penn Valley 5 Bed/ 5.1 Bath | 6,000 sq ft | Colonial | $1,650,000 307 Clwyd Rd, Bala Cynwyd 6 Bed/ 5.1 Bath | 7,950 sq ft | Tudor | $1,595,000 437 Hidden River Rd, Penn Valley 6 Bed/ 5.2 Bath | 6,324 sq ft | Colonial | $1,499,000 1351 Bobarn Dr, Penn Valley 5 Bed/ 4.1 Bath | 6,647 sq ft | Contemporary | $1,295,000 241 Indian Creek Rd, Wynnewood 5 Bed/ 5.2 Bath | 6,896 sq ft | Colonial | $1,198,000 616 Broad Acres Rd, Penn Valley 4 Bed/ 3.2 Bath | 0.49 acres | Colonial | $1,200,000 1315 Club House Rd, Gladwyne 5 Bed/ 4.1 Bath | 4,308 sq ft | Colonial | $1,125,000 726 Conshohocken State Rd, Penn Valley 4 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 4,894 sq ft | Colonial | $1,080,000
The William Penn House - Center City Living!
RIGHT IN THE HEART OF PACKER PARK.
CENTER CITY PHILA.
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" ! Studios $200,000 to $300,000 1 Bedrooms $300,000 to $400,000 2 Bedrooms $400,000 to $500,000 3 Bedrooms $500,000 to $600,000 " 239 Trianon Ln, Villanova 4 Bed/3.1 Bath | 3,443 sq ft | Colonial | $865,000 1416 Flat Rock Rd, Penn Valley 5 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 3,635 sq ft | Colonial | $825,000 615 Yale Rd, Bala Cynwyd 5 Bed/ 5.1 Bath | 4,070 sq ft | Colonial | $789,000 424 Devereux Dr, Villanova Lot | $665,000 519 Spruce Ln, Villanova 3 Bed/ 3 Bath | 2,750 sq ft | Colonial | $665,000 1172 Saint Andrews Rd, Bryn Mawr 3 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 2,984 sq ft | Ranch | $625,000 415 S Woodbine Ave, Penn Valley 4 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 3,186 sq ft | Contemporary | $599,000 115 Conshohocken State Road, Bala Cynwyd 5 Bed/3.2 Bath | 0.18 acres | Colonial | $559,000 226 S Spring Mill Rd, Villanova 4 Bed/ 2.1 Bath | 2,482 sq ft | Colonial | $619,000 xxx West Chester Pike, Havertown Lot | $400,000 7106 Llanfair Rd, Upper Darby 5 Bed/ 2.2 Bath | 2,830 sq ft | Colonial | $234,900 526 Midvale Rd, Upper Darby 4 Bed/ 2.1 Bath | 2,249 sq ft | Colonial | $219,000
2401 Pennsylvania Ave, Unit 7B31, Philadelphia 1 Bed/1 Bath; 1,343 sq ft Condo $299,000
JUST REDUCED 1901 John F Kennedy Blvd, Unit# 710, Philadelphia Studio/ 1 Bath | 475 sq ft | Contemporary | $180,000 501 Kingsley Court, Philadelphia 4 Bed/ 2.1 Bath | 2,400 sq ft | Traditional | $441,300 508 Kingsley Court, Philadelphia 4 Bed/ 2.1 Bath | 2,400 sq ft | Traditional | $439,300 1901 John F Kennedy Blvd, Unit# 1409, Philadelphia 2 Bed/ 1 Bath | 1,140 sq ft | Contemporary | $439,000 418 Pensdale St, Philadelphia 3 Bed/ 3.1 Bath | 2,535 sq ft | Colonial | $369,000 2401 Pennsylvania Ave, Unit# 7B31, Philadelphia 1 Bed/ 1 Bath | 1,343 sq ft | Traditional | $299,000 2254 N Carlisle St, Philadelphia 5 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,830 sq ft | Other | $269,000 2248 N Carlisle St, Philadelphia 5 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,606 sq ft | Other | $239,000 1901 John F Kennedy Blvd, Unit# 1911, Philadelphia Studio/ 1 Bath | 552 sq ft | Contemporary | $199,000 1901 John F Kennedy Blvd, Unit# 1412, Philadelphia Studio/ 1 Bath | 475 sq ft | Contemporary | $187,000
CONDO LIVING 191 Presidential Blvd, Unit# 824-25, Bala Cynwyd 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 2,100 sq ft | Traditional | $425,000 1655 Oakwood Dr, Unit# N115, Penn Valley 3 Bed/ 3 Bath | 1,716 sq ft | Contemporary | $325,000 1750 Oakwood Ter, Unit# 1A, Penn Valley 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,299 sq ft | End Unit Row | $259,000 1750 Oakwood Ter Unit #6D, Penn Valley 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,247 sq ft | 1ft Floor Unit| $249,000 20 Conshohocken State Rd, Unit# 611, Bala Cynwyd 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,735 sq ft | Traditional | $210,000
1219 W Wynnewood Rd, Unit# 213, Wynnewood 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,156 sq ft | Traditional | $190,000 1030 E Lancaster Ave, Unit# 116, Bryn Mawr 3 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,125 sq ft | Contemporary | $179,000 1650 Oakwood Dr, Unit# E119, Penn Valley 2 Bed/ 2 Bath | 1,144 sq ft | Contemporary | $179,900 1655 Oakwood Dr, Unit# N103, Narberth 1 Bed/ 1 Bath | 858 sq ft | Contemporary | $159,000 1030 E Lancaster Ave Unit #304, Bryn Mawr 1 Bed/ 1 Bath | 700 sq ft | Condo | $126,000
NEW PHASE NOW OPEN! THE MOST SPACIOUS MOST LUXURIOUS NEW TOWNHOMES WITH GARAGES STARTING AT $475,900
ASK ABOUT QUICK DELIVERY HOMES!
215.339.5390 SIENAPLACE.COM
SALES@SIENAPLACE.COM
MODEL HOMES OPEN
Mon, Thurs thru Sat 11-5 | Sun 12-5 10-YEAR TAX ABATEMENT AND VA AND FHA APPROVED!
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For more information contact:
2300 Hartranft Street, Philadelphia, PA 19145 Between Penrose Ave. and 26th St.
215.563.7400 ext 3045
BROKER COOPERATION IS WARMLY INVITED AND APPRECIATED.
philadelphiaweekly.com
All prices and features subject to change without notice. Please see sales consultant for details.
WHAT TO DO | WHERE TO GO | WHERE TO LIVE | WHAT’S UP NEXT
Anne E. Koons
ACCREDITED LUXURY HOME SPECIALIST Licensed in NJ & PA
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Cherry Hill/Wilderness Acres Welcome to the quiet community that hosts this architectural jewel with 3 bedrooms, 3.5 baths, 2 car garage, in ground pool, walk out basement, an open floor plan with cathedral ceilings, 2 story windows, skylights, newly refinished hardwood floors, freshly painted throughout the interior and exterior that is situated on almost an acre of property. $660,000.
Marlton/ The Preserves at Little Mill Beautiful custom home located on the Preserves at Little Mill golf course with 5 Bedrooms, 6 ½ baths, 3 car garage and finished basement. 1st floor master bedroom suite with gas fireplace, double French doors to patio and a large custom bath. The gourmet kitchen will make any chef happy. 4 additional bedrooms and 3 baths are on the second level. $899,000.
HADDONFIELD/LANE OF ACRES Custom Gary Gardner built estate home with 5 BRs, 5 full & 2 half baths, 4 car garage, elevator & walk out lower level on over 2.5 acres of lush grounds. 2 story foyer & great room, gourmet kitchen, expansive owner s suite w/2 dressing rooms. Lower level with walk in humidor, wine room, bar & entertaining area, theater & gym. All this on a beautifully landscaped property, with salt water fish pond.$3,800,000
MOORESTOWN Magnificent estate on 7 acres w/pond. 6BR, 6 bath home w/3 car heated garage. Atrium, indoor pool/spa & 10 person Jacuzzi, blue stone & brick patio overlooking the backyard w/ water-falls & ponds. Newer Cedar Shake roof, AC & barn w/ kitchenette
Voorhees/Lake Villa 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath, large updated kitchen with sunroom, formal living room and dining room, 1 car garage, full partially basement located on a large corner lot in a desirable neighborhood with an in-ground pool and fenced yard. $309,000
Voorhees/Sturbridge Woods/ High Point Amazing French style Estate that has 6 Bedrooms, 6.2 Baths, full finished basement, 3 car garage, an in-ground pool with pool house, ponds and water-falls nestled on approximately 1.5 acres located at the end of a cul-desac $1,375,000
0DUOWRQ 7KH 3UHVHUYHV DW /LWWOH 0LOO Gorgeous custom 3 bedroom, 2.5 bath home backing to the preserves at Little Mill golf course with a 1st floor master suite, 1st fl. study, 2 car garage and full unfinished basement. The large foyer has cathedral ceilings & ceramic floors. Living room has 12 foot ceilings, custom built entertainment center, gas fireplace, Large eat-in kitchen w/ french sliding patio doors leading to back deck & views of golf course. A perfect empty-nester home.
Voorhees/Lost Tree Custom built home on Cult-de-Sac w/6 Br s, 4 full & 2 half baths, walk out finished basement, 3 car garage. This home is bright & open w/a grand Foyer, 2 story windows, custom spiral wood staircase that goes to the second floor and lower level. The 2 fl has 5 bedrooms & 3 full baths. The 6th BR, 4th bath and huge bonus room with bar can be found on the lower level. $649,000
THE WORLD ACCORDING TO STEVEN, NICOLE & JOSH 1RZ PRUH WKDQ HYHU EXPERIENCE FRXQWV WKDW LV ZK\ \RX QHHG WR FDOO RXU AUNT ANNE EHFDXVH VKH KDV WKH EXPERIENCE, COMMITMENT, PASSION & KNOWLEDGE WR KHOS \RX LQ VHOOLQJ RU EX\LQJ D KRPH CALL OUR AUNT ANNE TODAY FOR ALL OF YOUR REAL ESTATE NEEDS 856 -795-4709
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707 S. 3RD STREET QUEEN VILLAGE - TRIPLEX TerriďŹ c location – This is a bright and spacious Triplex on a great Queen Village tree lined block. All units have good storage and closet space, nice size rooms and high ceilings, some wood oors and lots of exposed brick. The 1st oor unit is a bi-level 1st and 2nd oor, 2 bedroom + den + garden and full basement with washer and dryer, this could be a super owner’s unit needs updating). The 2nd and 3rd oor units are bright and spacious with a birds eye view from their great wrap around bay windows straight up Bainbridge Street and Bainbridge Green and to one of the last remaining Historic Granite Horse Trough + both units enjoy beautiful sunsets. Great Area, Great Neighbors, close to everything imaginable. Lots of parking around and in the Meredith School Catchment. $699,000
What They Are Saying: “ I have used Pat and Kathy to buy 3 houses and sell 2 over the past 18 years. The houses were in Queen Village and Rittenhouse Sq. They showed me as many places as I wanted and brought ideas to me based on what they knew my family needed. I have been very happy with their support, knowledge of the market, and responsiveness. They are local people who know the neighborhoods, process, and options.Also, Joanie in their ofďŹ ce is among the best. I would highly recommend them. In addition, I just like them as honest, good people!â€? Troy Kofroth
Patrick Conway
215-266-1537 215-850-3842 A]QWSbg 6WZZ =TÂż QS Â’ 215.627.6005 Â’ Please visit us online at www.conwayteam.com
NEW LISTING GRADUATE HOSPITAL This charming, beautifully renovated home features original hardwood floors, central air, recessed lighting, and ceiling fans throughout. The first floor boasts an open floor plan living and dining room with a gas fireplace, and a fully renovated kitchen with butcher block counters. This home offers a nice private back patio
$450,000
SOCIETY HILL
FISHTOWN Spacious 2 BR, 2 bath unit featuring Brazilian Cherry floors, 10ft ceilings, custom wood cabinets, and stainless steel appliances. The tranquil, two-level courtyard is adorned with beautiful flower gardens, planters, brick pavers a beautiful magnolia tree and custom ironwork. Enjoy one of the highest private rooftop decks in the area
$595,000
SOCIETY HILL
2 Units for sale! Beautiful mid-modern, 1 bedroom condominiums featuring nice hardwood floors, updated kitchens, spacious living areas, and lots of storage spaces. Outdoor swimming pool and deeded parking in garage included! These condos offer security and comfort in a gated community
Well maintained, three-story row home featuring random width wood flooring, 2 working fireplaces, custom wrought iron railings and spiral staircases with wood treads, and a new kitchen with a Belgian block floor. 2 Bedrooms, 1.5 Baths
NEW LISTING CENTER CITY
NEW PRICE GRADUATE HOSPITAL
This beautiful 1 BR, 1.5 bath condo features 17+ ft ceilings, a sundrenched interior, and an enormous Palladian window that defines the modern space. This building offers a 24/7 concierge service, a fitness center, a media room, an event space, a spectacular rooftop terrace, and direct access to Suburban Station, a full-service restaurant, and valet parking
Super sunny, well maintained 2 bed, 2 bath home. This home features beautiful hardwood floors and tall ceilings. Enter the home into the living room with exposed beams, a fireplace, and room for a dining table. Access to the small patio and covered alleyway is through the glass door in the living room, and there is also a gate to access the included side lot
From $349,000
$429,900
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Kathy Conway
$499,900
$415,000
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SP TLIGHT ON
BARBARA HINES May 3 – 30 Old City Jewish Arts Center 119 North 3rd Street | Philadelphia, PA ocjac.org | barbarahinesart.com 0$<
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