Philadelphia Weekly | May. 16 – May. 23, 2019

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FROM THE EDITOR

What’s in a week?

T

he week around Philly was kind keep it afloat, she’s just tired of fighting. The of interesting, to say the least. advances on Philadelphia’s music scene are First, the win: We – as in Philarguably what led to the Troc’s demise, with adelphia Weekly – are in 818 new big concert companies building and reviving drop spots throughout the city venues like Franklin Music Hall, The Fillmore and surrounding suburbs, so we and the latest in the revival of the Met Philhope you see our shiny yellow adelphia. These venues ultimately stamped boxes out on the street or our their names as the gentrifiers of both Philly’s stacks on the counter/bar at your favorite spot mainstream and underground concert scenes. If those three are the shiny new construcand pick us up. Second win: We did the damn tion pieces that can’t get sold fast enough, then the Troc is the thing with the folks at Technical.ly two-story row on the block getting for its annual Tech Week event. We crushed by taxes it can’t afford, just had a blast being a part of the event, to stay part of the scene. and there’s plenty to read when it Except in this scenario, there’s comes to tech and the people that no shady house hunter showing make it run across both of our sites. up with a wad of cash to buy you Had to give that shoutout. Now out, knock you down and turn you the lows. into a yoga studio or coffeehouse Shoutout to the reader who reor some shit – at least not yet. The ferred to one of my writers as a Trocadero Theater is listed within “dirty socialist slut” in a handwritthe National Register of Historic ten letter. For someone to take the Buildings, but all that means is that time to write that and walk their ass its bones must stay intact. What to the post office and mail that shit happens to its guts in the aftermath is some serious dedication. And if of it closing up for good later this that’s not terrifying enough, there’s @SPRTSWTR month still remains to be seen. also the reader who barged into our There’s still a few weeks left and office and demanded to speak with a couple of events left to go before the doors me regarding Kate Smith. And of course, the ultimate low, watching close on this city treasure. Do you have a that ball Kawhi Leonard shot bounce around Troc moment you’d like to share? Send them our way either via mail at mail@philadelphithe rim, knowing the Sixers season was over even before it went in. At the time of this aweekly.com or share on our social media week’s column, we’re in the office awaiting feeds with the hashtag #PWTroc. If we get the NBA Lottery, in which the Sixers have a enough, we’ll compile them all and run them one percent chance of getting the No. 1 pick, regardless of how crazy your story is. which is like hoping the dealer busts at the Changing gears before we roll out, can we blackjack table showing a face card. quickly chat Monday’s mayoral debate? If you It was a good season, and here’s hoping the missed the only live debate between the three candidates hoping to represent the DemocratSixers regroup and get after it next year. Also, I’m just going to say it, Joel Embiid ic party, we provided a quick rundown of the night in this week’s State of Our City (page crying is inspiring. But it’s also hilarious. 4-5). But if I’m being frank, none of the canOur cover story this week is a retrospective, or eulogy, if you will, of a city icon that hasn’t didates really impressed, with Alan Butkovitz coming off petty, Anthony Williams sounding shut its doors yet. like a pie in the sky idealist and incumbent At the end of the month, the Trocadero Theatre will close after being an integral part candidate Jim Kenney rehashing much of the of the city’s fabric for over a century. I’m well same old, same old. I left that debate still scratching my head as aware all good things come to an end, but in to who the best candidate is to vote for on May the case of the Troc, it shouldn’t have to. I’d like to believe that there’s a prominent name 21. After speaking with a few people in the afin this city with expendable cash that loves termath of the debate, uncertainty seems to music. Perhaps there’s someone with the forebe the consensus. Finally, if you’re around this weekend, the sight to make that place a hybrid that fits all types of events that derive from within this Italian Festival is happening along South 9th Street. weirdly awesome city. We’ll be down there on both Saturday and I know it’s easier said than done, but in Sunday, so after your half ball game or watchthe case of the Troc, I wish the option was to ing people attempt to climb a pole coated in evolve instead of calling it quits. But perhaps that’s easier said than done oil, stop by our table and come say what’s up for Joanna Pang, whose family has owned to our team. That’s all I have for this week, Philly. the iconic venue for decades. She told writer Thanks for riding with us. A.D. Amorosi that when it comes to trying to

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Stance on Soda Tax: STATE “We all know why there’s a soda tax,” Butkovitz chimed in, saying it was revealed “in the federal indictment of John Dougherty. It was a pernicious device to punish the teamsters and people who held jobs who frankly supported Senator Williams last time and didn’t have the wisdom to get on board with the Kenney machine and John Dougherty.”

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Shots fired: Near the end, things got heated between Kenney and Butkovitz, with Kenney jabbing at the former city controller, who lost his fourth bid for re-election to Rebecca Rhynhart two years ago. “The fact of the matter is, Mr. Butkovitz was fired by the voters because he didn’t do his job.”

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Dan McDonough, Jr. Chairman & Publisher Kerith Gabriel Editor in Chief

Anthony Williams

Friends and enemies

“What we will not do is further tax poor people with soda taxes so that frankly they are the ones that stay on the bottom.” Williams said he would use the budget surplus to fund pre-k and after school programs.

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CITY

Jim Kenney

Alan Butkovitz

“I believe this tax is equitable because you don’t have to buy the product,” he said, adding that it has funded programs such as universal pre-K, parks and recreation centers, community schools and libraries. He also said that people who are buying soda can switch to bottled water, which is probably packaged by the same companies. “I don’t know how there’s a loss of jobs if people are switching from one product to another.”

OF OUR

In Monday night’s mayoral debate, current Mayor Jim Kenney lacked any ounce of charisma as he faced off against State Sen. Anthony Hardy Williams, who came off looking like the most composed and competent leader, and former City Controller Alan Butkovitz, who just slung zingers. Over the course of the hour-long affair, there were highlights, lowlights and some who tried to steal the spotlight from the candidates. If you didn’t tune in and are still wondering what went down, we got you.

Most cringeworthy moment:

Kenney talked about reducing homicides and started to become a little garbled and ridiculous, saying that his administration is “working on the ground with people with lived experience, people who have been away…to try to convince our young people the error of these ways and that it’s permanent when you’re killed or you kill someone else.”

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STATE OF OUR CITY

Stance on education: “They’re doing a very good job,” he said about the newly appointed nine-member school board. “We’ve had three consecutive years of improvement in test scores and graduation rates under [Superintendent] Dr. Hite. We’re putting unprecedented amounts of money into schools, not waiting for Harrisburg to fund something they’re never going to fund or for Washington… The more our schools improve, the more people will stay in our city.”

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“Mayor Kenney is bragging about a 1 percent increase in [graduation] rates from 66 to 67 percent. They’ve eased the pass requirements in some of these scores. I’m not interested in gamesmanship. I’m interested in real progress.”

“It’s unfair to grade this current school board. They have been there a very short period of time. I do think it’s fair to acknowledge that we have a significant problem in terms of public education in Philadelphia,” Williams said, citing the fact that 60 percent of fourth graders were reading below the proficient level and that the majority of graduating classes were operating below proficient in reading and math. “The system is simply not working aggressively enough.”

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Stance on crime/cops:

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Despite the fact that there has been a 12 percent jump in violence and 119 homicides so far this year, Kenney defended himself by arguing that his administration had “marshalled all the departments to deal with this issue [of the increased homicide rate]. We have all the people together, and we’re working to get these numbers down,” he said, adding that “one of the problems is that this state is a crazy gun state,” making it impossible to get anti-gun legislation passed. Kenney said he didn’t think people should judge his five-year plan for reducing gun violence after only three months.

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“Just like we did with the opioid crisis, we need to recognize that homicides in Philadelphia are at an epidemic level.” Kenney’s advocacy of the stop-and-frisk policy does not make the city safer but just further divides the community, Williams said.

“We have to stop stop-and-frisk so we can reduce the war between the police and the community.” Butkovitz advocated identifying people “who are selling guns out of trunks and make it inhospitable in Philadelphia,” funding more job programs and adding more police on the streets. Butkovitz said that safe injection sites, where users could inject drugs under medical supervision, would draw further police manpower away from dealing with the increase in the homicide rate.

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Exit stage left Iconic, weird and uniquely Philly, the Trocadero will most certainly be missed

I

comic pounces on the elephant in the room. t’s a warm evening at the end of And it has nothing to do with Ariana or Kate. April, and two long lines are snak“So, I hear this place is closing,” he said, ing around Arch Street’s Trocadero matter-of-factly. “That’s a shame.” Theatre in either direction. The lanky stand-up comedian asks The usual pandemonium BY A.D. rhetorically why the Troc is shutteraround the Troc’s front entrance is something that ac- AMOROSI ing. “Are they tearing this place down, probably putting up a parking lot? companies any packed-tight They can use another one in this city night at Chinatown’s venerable venue – the parking sucks.” Later, he warns, “Don’t dedicated to indie rock, metal, burlesque clap, or I’m never coming back here… Oh, and comedy. This particular night, the buzz this place is closing, so I can’t anyways.” has doubled down with two shows featurAs of June 1, no one can come back to ing comedian Pete Davidson. the Trocadero. At least, not until current The “Saturday Night Live” star is a hot owner-operator Joanna Pang sells it to commodity (a movie on his life is to be someone who, hopefully, wants a used opdirected by Judd Apatow, and he’s made era-house-turned-vaudeville-hall-turnedrecent headlines regarding his relationstrip-joint-turned-Chinese-martial-arts cineships with Ariana Grande and Kate ma-turned-indie-rock-palace. Beckinsale). He slipped in these Troc The last two nights of the current iteragigs at the last minute between tion of the Troc will feature cabaret perforPennsylvania dates with fellow mances from Big Mess Cabaret on May 31 comedian and pal, John Muand June 1. It was cabaret that opened the laney. doors to the Troc when current owner Pang Several past Troc employtook it over. Following those two dates, it’ll ees and managers mingle be official: the 1,200 GA capacity room, built with the current crew, as the Arch Street Opera House in 1870 and exchanging hugs and renamed the Trocadero in 1896, will then laughs. If the show inclose. side the Troc is half No more Movie Mondays, which ended in as good as the one recent weeks. Robert Drake’s Zombie parties outside, this will be ended Saturday. Dancing Ferret’s Dracula’s memorable. Balls close out May 18. An all-day, all-ages fiNo sooner nal call for local 90s-centric rock bands (Danthan Davidson delion, Three4Tens) is May 19. Even Carmen hits the Troc’s Martella III’s caustic Skeletor character and long, deep his frat-famous Karaoke Gung Show must stage, the vacate the Victorian-tinged premises as of flinty-voiced May 25. New York

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1870 On May 31, the Troc’s neighbor in Space 1026, the art gallery and collective, also leaves the block, having had its original home sold out from under it (fear not, Space 1026 is relocating to a former beauty shop on North Broad). This, however, marks the end of a crusty, DIY era and its accompanying glamor within Chinatown. “That block of Arch in Chinatown was a beacon at a very important time — the earlyto-mid 1990s — when indie rock needed places and outlets for it to survive and thrive,” said neighboring MAGNET magazine magnate Eric Miller, whose offices reside across from the Troc and next to 1026. “Philly needed those things to have a place on the national map, proving we weren’t some second-rate town between NYC and [Washington] D.C.” Miller didn’t hold back on what the establishments that took up space along that section of Arch Street meant to the community and Philly’s music scene. “When MAGNET moved to Arch, that block —hampered by having the bus station smack in the middle of it — had us, the Troc, Decibel mag and Space 1026 all doing our things,” he said. “If a bomb wiped out that block then, the indie rock/punk/metal/skate/art world would have suffered a major loss. Then again, in typical Philly fashion, you could walk down that block and never know those things were even there. Losing the Troc as a music venue isn’t just a crushing blow for Philly’s music scene and what it’s becoming, it’s a huge loss for the city. Those walls have seen lots of this city’s most important musical history, but like most of us, they were probably too drunk and high to remember most of it.” ‘This was home to me’ What might the Trocadero Theatre sell for dollar-wise? Neither Pang or anyone on-or-off the record would discuss costs. As the property for neighboring Space 1026 sold for between $1.6 million (according to Redfin) and $3.3 million (according to Zillow), it’s fair to say that the larger 14,516 square feet-sized Troc could net a comparable price. “It’s worth a bundle, even though there is a LOT of work to be done in there,” said one anonymous source close to the ins-and-outs of the property. “Don’t think there’s been any money put toward renovation in 20 years.” According to a recent check of property records, Pang also owned Brewerytown’s North Star Bar property, set to re-open as a restaurant-beer garden, as well as 1227 Walnut Street’s Chatayee Thai, the one-time home to Portofino, Walnut Street Supper Club and Cibo.

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The Troc opens originally as the Arch Street Opera House, showing minstrel shows and musicals.

Many of the reasons that the Troc is closing are clear. Pang is the daughter of Stephen Pang, who purchased the Troc in 1979 and operated it as a Chinese-themed cinema through the early 1980s until Rick Blatstein bought and transitioned the venue into a rock club in 1986. Brothers David and Stephen Simons took it over in 1991. Pang said her decision to sell her beloved theater was akin to losing a family member. “This was home to me,” Pang said, days after rumors of the Trocadero’s imminent closure, on the heels of promoters pulling their shows from the schedule. “For real, I used to run around the Troc as a kid.” Pang offered personal reminiscences about how the Troc affected her, and how she hopefully affected the Troc. “We’re proud of what we’ve done for the last 20 years, not only in regards to the music scene, local and national, but beyond, too. We were an independent room that could embrace and pursue every aspect of multiculturalism, from drag performers to zombie proms to LGBTQ events. We were dedicated to welcoming every and all artistic scene. I’m proud of that. But it’s time.” With that, Pang spoke of how the business landscape has changed in the last five years. “It’s harder now to be an independently run venue. It’s a different world. There are bigger rooms run by much bigger concert corporations than me,” she noted, talking (presumably) about Live Nation’s recently opened rooms in the Met Philadelphia and the Fillmore, AEG/Bowery Presents’ takeover of the old Electric Factory (now Franklin Music Hall), or University City’s World Café Live and the Eraserhood’s Union Transfer. All of these venues offer fans a less grungy alternative to the Trocadero’s tattered (literal) Victorian grandeur. Soon to offer more competition is the Center City outpost of City Winery, the NYC-

The Trocadero Theatre opened in 1870 and offered musical comedy, traveling minstrel shows and burlesque, originally under the name Arch Street Opera House. | Image courtesy: TheTroc.com based adult-oriented live music venue opening in the Fashion District Philly building known as the Gallery at Market East. “Mostly, though, I’m tired, you know?” Pang said with a mix of sadness and weariness. “I’ve been at this for a while. It’s time to let someone else take a shot at it, maybe.” Pang wouldn’t comment on sales price nor potentially interested parties, with the latter including those close to her who contacted her in April wanting to lease the Troc. “I’ll need a real break after that last Big Mess show,” she said. Some have called Pang tough to work for and with. Some say she was a sweetheart to work for and with. Having worked for her as an independent promoter early on, this reporter genuinely found her fair and easy, even willing, to collaborate. “Joanna was the reason burlesque itself was represented there,” said Peek-A-Boo Revue co-founder Scott Johnston. His show and Pang’s Troc were partners in playful mischief when it came to the modern burlesque revival. Johnston’s “Free Festival” Burlesque-N-Beyond held sessions at the Troc with Legends, the term for “burly broads over 60ish,” according to Johnston.

1950s Troc becomes full-fledged burlesque venue hosting some of the world’s best professional showgirls.

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1970s These included Penny Starr, Canadian Beaver-Mama Judith Stein and the recently-deceased Satan’s Angel: Queen of the Fire Tassels. “It is America’s only still-standing functioning burlesque theater,” Johnston said. “I’ll miss it to the point of refusing to even accept its demise, and if it becomes a Chinatown Walgreens, I’ll bug them to allow me to produce burly shows there.” Several sources revealed to PW that Pang’s Troc wasted several prime opportunities, whether it came down to the booking or renovation. A close-to-thebone source who spoke on the condition of anonymity recalled that the venue — added to the National Register of Historic Places in 1973 — never made the most of its one-time booking arrangement with concert promoter AEG Live, and that the entries made

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Trocadero dives into arts scene becoming a home for fine arts and a movie hall showcasing vintage films.

by Live Nation and R5 Productions (“they drove [R5 founder-owner] Sean Agnew away, everyone there,”) came to nothing. “For better or for worse, Joanna did it her way,” another source said. “No one can fault that. A lot of people wanted to help her. Really help. But, she didn’t want anyone else’s help. That’s a strong, cool way to be.” Pure Philly It was Pang’s dogged determination and booking or co-booking savvy that brought a host of grunge, hip hop, indie rock and underground comedy’s biggest names to its hallowed, grimy stages (can’t forget the Balcony Bar’s stage). Whether during Pang’s reign or under the Blatstein or Simmons umbrellas, the Troc played host to Guns N’ Roses, Bob Dylan, Beck, De La Soul, Jesus & Mary Chain, Pigface, Dead Milkmen, Ween, Guided by Voices (the headliner for MAGNET’s 21st birthday showcase), Gary Numan, Killing Joke, Deee-Lite, Offspring, Iggy Pop, Sparks, a dynamic 1995 Bjork and Aphex Twin bill, and Neil Young & the Bluenotes during 1988’s “This Note’s for You” tour. As an appropriately grimy haven for grunge sounds, the Troc welcomed Hole, Dinosaur Jr., Smashing Pumpkins, Superchunk and an early Foo Fighters show with Eddie Vedder at the mic. There were house music dance floor events with the Roxy NYC’s host Lee Chappell and drag shows from downtown Manhattan doyen Needles Jones. Famously, Jack White threw a hissy fit when The White Stripes played the Troc in 2002 and the audience was, collectively, lukewarm to his tepid charms. In 2014, stand-up comedian Hannibal Buress called Bill Cosby a rapist during a set, a bit he’d been doing forever, only to be captured via cell phone camera by then-Philly Mag scribe Dan McQuade. The vid-snippet went viral and led to a reexamination of the so-called comedian’s sex crimes and an eventual conviction on sexual assault charges. Local acts and events packed the house at the Chinatown venue for more than a few of WXPN (88.5-FM) DJ Robert Drake’s naughty zombie holiday parties, many Peek-a-Boo. Revue striptease balls and Pig Iron Theatre’s charitable “For the Throughout its many iterations, the Troc has been everything; from a burlesque Love of Pig Iron” soirees. theater, a movie theater, a rock venue, a comedy stage to a home for freaks and

geeks. | Images courtesy: Patrick Rodgers

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“The thing that made the Troc home was its commitment to the local arts and music community,” said WXPN’s Drake. “It’s rough and rugged exterior, mixed with its worn but relaxed vibe, pure Philly. Joanna gets it in regards to producing such events.” The Travel Channel came to film the Zombie Prom for a special on Halloween events coast-to-coast, and Mr. Halloween, Henri David, joined Drake on-stage to marry two zombies in front of a thousand undead friends. “That’s just two of my juicier memories of zombie time at the Troc,” recalled Drake. When word hit that the Troc would close, Drake’s Philly Zombie crew needed closure with one more zombie gathering after having held sold out Zombie Proms, Zombie Beach Parties and Monster Balls there since 2007. “The undead came out in droves to our most unusual wake for the old gal,” Drake said, with a laugh about Saturday’s “Last Gasp” dance party. “I’ll miss all of the fun and history of this place,” said Pang, who is bringing back The Big Mess Theatre to give herself one final sentimental and truly weird send off. “I too had some magical sexy nights there,” said Philly-based Low Cut Connie pianist-singer Adam Weiner. “I first played there as a solo act (Ladyfingers) many years ago, and barely five months ago, we chose the Troc for our New Year’s Eve show. We shot our video for ‘Revolution Rock n’ Roll’ there. The room gave the whole video a seedy but open-hearted vibe, pure rock n roll. This is a very dirty, vibey Philly room. I loved it.” Still, by the end of the 2018 calendar year into 2019, one couldn’t help but notice that things were winding down and wilding out. Promoters such as Patrick Rodgers, the name behind Dancing Ferret Concerts and the annual Dracula’s Ball and Dave “Kiss” Kisleiko (Dave Kiss Presents, the team behind Low Cut Connie’s New Year’s Eve gig, 2018’s King of Disco Giorgio Moroder soiree and New Zealand’s The Chills in March) are but two of Pang’s collaborators to have stayed the test. Promoters such as Patrick Rodgers, the name behind Dancing Ferret Concerts and the annual Dracula’s Ball and Dave “Kiss” Kisleiko (Dave Kiss Presents, the team behind Low Cut Connie’s New Year’s Eve gig, 2018’s King of Disco Giorgio Moroder soiree and New Zealand’s The Chills in March) are but two of Pang’s collaborators to have stayed the test. “Seeing the Troc close is sad for a lot of reasons,” said Kisleiko, who was told he had to reshuffle his booking to several other venues in town at the end of March. After having booked shows on the main stage and its balcony since 2012, Kisleiko’s bookings became steadier in early 2017 after his sold-out Os Mutantes gig. “Suddenly, I had easier access to the room, started to get first holds/first rights on dates. Before that, when I went to get a hold on the room, I was second or third in line, as AEG had contracted first rights.”

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1980s He stayed busy at the Troc with three to five shows in the balcony and one or two main stage shows a month, logging nearly 75 shows there since the start of his tenure. Despite this, Kisleiko described his relationship with Pang as “distant.” “I always had a liaison to go between Joanna and myself,” Kisleiko said. “We weren’t very close. She only knew me through the numbers I produced on paper.” Like Pang, Kisleiko points to stiff competition as the Troc’s principal headache. “Union Transfer is...a similar size to the Troc,” he said. “The design of UT is thoughtful for everyone that has to interact within the space, from artists, production workers, managers. Although the Troc is a majestic, historic building, it’s less conducive to live music compared to a venue designed specifically for large productions. But that’s what made the Troc special. I can’t speculate on Joanna’s decision-making process. However, without a house talent buyer fighting to win business against billion dollar companies, the Troc lost standing as a go-to spot.” Not enough muscle Kisleiko went on to comment that with The Troc soon to be gone, independent booking in Philly will become more difficult for promoters such as himself — and for fans looking beyond conglomerate concert booking. “Look, Philly’s live music scene is thriving,” he said. “Audiences will go see who they want to see. I’m less concerned about the audience, and more about what will happen to the space. We can only hope that someone with a mindset of preserving Philadelphia’s history continues to make sure the Troc’s past and future remain ingrained in the fabric of Philly.” After fifty shows at the Troc, including specialty Dracula’s Balls needing someplace gloriously dilapidated like the Troc, Rodgers recalled, “Joanna has said she considers me part of the Troc family. I was given a degree of operational oversight most outside promoters don’t get. Joanna told her staff to help make my events successful, and they always did. I made a lot of money for them, and they offered me an arrangement that reflected that.” Rodgers noted the competition from the usual suspects of Union Transfer, AEG and Live Nation as the Troc’s principal problem. “When a venue doesn’t have enough shows, it’s like not having enough oxygen,” he said, inferring these bigger bookers had taken all the air from the room. Rodgers had an interesting take on the onetime outsourced booking arrangements that Pang had at her command. “The only insight I can offer into that is to look at the kind of shows that AEG was putting into the room,” he said. “From what I saw, there were a lot of podcasts, gaming things, comedy shows. These are not events that were generating a lot of revenue at the bar, from what I heard.” Representatives of AEG and Live Nation — some

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Trocadero gets makeover and becomes dance club, concert venue and live music venue.

of whom worked with, even for, Pang in the past — declined to discuss the Trocadero’s business, then and now. Without the shows, there’s no rental income, no bar sales, no revenue,” Rodgers said of the Troc’s decline. “When your expenses exceed your revenue for long enough, you have to quit.” Behind the scenes of imminent closure, Rodgers spent weeks in April trying to convince Pang to give him her blessing to launch an effort to save the Troc. “My idea was for a subscription model where people would commit to contributing a small monthly sum,” he said. “If a sufficient number of people subscribed, the venue could cover operating costs. If not enough people signed up, we’d never bill anyone. That would be the end of it. I didn’t want to undertake this without Joanna’s approval, and while her thinking on the matter was fluid over the course of conversations, in the end, she felt that there just wasn’t a path forward for an independent venue in a marketplace with very well-funded players, many rooms and nights to fill with shows.”

Luckily, Pang was receptive to Rodgers’ suggestion that she keep the venue open long enough to give it a proper send-off rather than shuttering it quietly in early April as she initially planned. “Those who have strong feelings about the venue are grateful for having a few more opportunities to enjoy it before it shutters,” Rodgers said. “We’re going to go out with a bang,” Pang said. Ask Pang what possible solution could be made regarding a space such as the Troc, a battered-but-beautiful lady on the National Register of Historic Places, and she’ll say that the options are limited. “It’s not like you can turn it into a Wawa. It’s right in Center City and has huge square footage, so it can’t be cheap. The Trocadero built a great brand… Another venue could work to fill that void if it had the right people at the helm and the building itself kept its character and good bones.” She paused, then added a final thought. “But nothing will have the same charm as the Troc.”

@ADAMOROSI

2000s Still hosting headline acts, Troc locally becomes venue of choice for LGBT community, horror fans and other niche events.

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All counties in Pennsylvania are required to update their voting machines ahead of the 2020 presidential election. | Image: PW file photo

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‘Not a good look’ How the unexpected arrival of controversial voting machines still has many scratching their heads a week later

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t a recent City Council meeting, until all her questions were answered. Her office could not provide an update at dozens of constituents showed up, some holding signs that the time of this report. Meanwhile, in response to questions from read “Protect Our Votes” and city councilmembers, Nick Custodio, the dep“XL Don’t Fit Me,” to protest the ES&S Express Vote XL mauty city commissioner for Deeley, said the machines arrived early for training purposes chines – 83 of which recently appeared in Philadelphia, despite and testing. He would not respond to this reporter’s questions in person and did not reply the fact that funding has not been approved by to emailed questions. the controller or city council and that a con“From the appearance side, even though tract has not been finalized. All counties in the Commonwealth must a contract hasn’t been signed,” it seems as though “it’s a done deal,” Councilwoman Cinpurchase new voting machines before the dy Bass told Custodio during the presidential election next year. meeting. “We’re in the business of City Commissioners Lisa Deeley and Al Schmidt voted to apBY COURTENAY trying to reassure the public…[so this is] probably not the best look prove the procurement contract HARRIS BOND for the board.” in February and then immediateBass told PW she thinks it would ly recused themselves from the have been a lot easier had the Deboard because they are running partment of State taken over the process and for re-election. Judges Giovanni Campbell and Vincent Furlong were appointed in their selected the same voting machines for every county in the Commonwealth, in part so that place. Commissioner Anthony Clark, who is not if people move around, they are using the running for re-election, was not part of the same machines, reducing voter intimidation. “This was a mandate from the Commonselection committee which created a request for proposals many critics say was slanted wealth of Pennsylvania in requiring that we toward the ES&S Express Vote XL machines. go to a new system without really the level These new machines weigh approximately 200 of guidance the county should have had from pounds more than the current machines and the Commonwealth,” Bass said. “This is probdo not allow people to use paper ballots – the lematic. It was the Department of State’s relatter of which it’s believed makes them more sponsibility to determine what best machines susceptible to tampering. were.” The city has allocated roughly $22 million In regards to responses from Custodio and for the purchase of new voting machines. Chief Deputy Commissioner Seth Bluestein, With a $30 million price tag for ES&S Express who represents Schmidt to questions asked by Vote XL machines, the city will now have to members of city council, Bass said: borrow more funds to cover the cost. “I understand their response which was “It’s not just the cost. It’s also the interest that testing the machines out takes time. Plus, on the borrowing of that money,” City Counthey have an election. I get all of that. But voter confidence right now across the board just cilman Allan Domb said at the meeting. City Controller Rebecca Rhynhart recently isn’t really good. We’re trying to reassure the public that we’re doing right by them. I do besaid she would not release any money for purchasing new machines until she understands lieve the commissioners are trying to do right by its citizenry, but how are we trying to rehow the 83 machines landed on city property. Her office has subpoenaed records from the assure voters that this was well thought out commissioners’ offices related to the selection on the local level? We need to have a stronger process, and Rhynhart told PW that she would not allow the procurement to move forward SEE VOTING, PAGE 12

The ES&S ExpressVote XL doesn’t allow for the registry of traditional paper ballots, which have some residents questioning how this machine can be tamperproof | Image courtesy: ES&S.com screenshot

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Vote XL produces. “This cannot be audited by a human being. Human beings cannot read a message on the local level.” barcode.” Constituents at a recent City CommissionThe constituents who have been testifying on a regular basis before the commission ers’ sunshine meeting continued to voice their disapproval of the ES&S machines, as they have been arguing in favor of systems that use hand-marked paper ballots that then go have been doing every Wednesday for the past couple of months. through optical scanners. They are more seES&S officials did not respond to multiple cure because a paper ballot is much harder to requests for a statement. tamper with, advocates say. “All eyes are on Philadelphia now as the Plus, critics are suggesting that there may largest county to choose machines and one of be some unsavory incentive to select the ES&S the earliest to do so,” testified attorney Jamie machines over other options. Mogil, who was recently election protection “The process to adopt this has been the director for Pennsylvania for midterm elecmost disgusting and unethical procurement process that I have ever seen in the city, and tions and who also represents the League of Women Voters. “What the city is saying is that I think it serves only the special interests who will benefit financially from it’s OK to have this vital dethis system,” attorney Mark cision be shrouded in secrecy without explanation for Zecca, who worked as a lawwhat appears to be the most yer in city government for expensive, least secure opmore than 20 years, told PW. tion.” “We see Commissioner “Does it not concern you and candidate Lisa Deeley that each week we come herself with unfettered acback with new informacess to these machines. And tion highlighting the lack guess who knows all about of transparency, the false that? Nick Custodio,” Prourgency of time, and the bitect Our Vote Philly Coalizarre appearance of 83 mation member Rich Garella chines without a contract testified before the comnegotiated and signed?” mission. “Wherever there’s – Cindy Bass, the unopposed Mogil asked during the [an] activity that should be incumbent for City Council meeting, getting no recarried out by the Board sponse. “I had noted when I of Elections, there’s Nick first came before you a month ago there seems Custodio. He’s really a one-man Board of Electo be a stink which has now festered into a tions by the look of it. This is Nick Custodio stench.” whose entire career is defined by his relationShe presented the commissioners with a ship with Local 98 and the building trades – statement from the League of Women Voters just like Commissioner Deeley.” that read in part: “In light of the attempts by According to phillypowerresearch.org, foreign agents to interfere with our elections, Deeley’s campaign is supported in bulk by and in response to the Governor’s mandate to the building trades. Councilman Bobby HePennsylvania’s counties to upgrade their votnon who was recently included in a 116-count ing systems to newer, more secure systems, federal indictment against union boss John the League of Women Voters of Pennsylvania “Johnny Doc” Dougherty, introduced the best (LWVPA) urges counties to consider updatvalue procurement initiative, that was used ing their voting systems to the most efficient, for the first time in the city during this procost-effective and secure option.” curement process. Deeley is a former Henon “LWVPA expresses its concern with the aide. process that Philadelphia County used to se“Members of the Board of Elections, you lect its voting machines. ‘We are advocates of were appointed to oversee Philadelphia’s votan open and transparent procurement proing system, and the process is moving without cess. Particularly, with any large expenditure you and continues to move in the wrong direclike this – upwards of $20 million dollars and tion,” testified Murielle Mundy McCarthy, a $60 million over the total contract length – citPOV member, at the sunshine meeting. “But izens need to know that their voices are being the city has time to select a safer, cheaper, votheard by their elected officials, and in this ing system that won’t risk the rights of 1 milcase, they’re not,’” LWVPA Executive Director lion voters. So please, stop wasting time, take Jill Greene said. charge and choose a better voting system.” Cindy Carey, who has also served for many Neither Furlong nor Campbell responded years as a judge of elections, brought in a flyer to requests for comment. Last week, Clark about the Express Vote XL machine, suggesttold PW that he “didn’t want to be part of any ing that it had four ports for hackers, includsecret” and assured outraged citizens that he ing the power panel, the ballot (which ultiand the board would find out how the 83 mamately appears as a bar code), the printer, and chines appeared. Clark did not respond to rethe scanner. quests for further comment for this story. “Can you read this?” she asked, holding @CHARRISBOND up a picture of the barcode the ES&S Express

“From the appearance side, even though a contract hasn’t been signed,” it seems as though “it’s a done deal.

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Is Mumia Abu-Jamal one step closer to getting a new trial? One which he has sought since 1982? | Image: Tyler Rutherford

Trials and tribulations

Is this Mumia Abu-Jamal’s last, best chance to get the new trial he says he deserves? BY JON HURDLE

A

fter 37 years in prison for being convicted of killing a Philadelphia policeman in 1981, Mumia Abu-Jamal got a new glimmer of hope last month when District Attorney Larry Krasner withdrew his objection to a city judge’s ruling that an appeals court should take another look at the inmate’s failed appeals. On April 17, Judge Leon Tucker of the Philadelphia Court of Common Pleas ordered a new review on the grounds that the appeals were denied by Pennsylvania Supreme Court judges, including former Chief Justice Ronald Castille – who pushed for the execution of cop killers when he was DA. Tucker wrote in March that Castille should have recused himself from the high court’s hearings on Abu-Jamal’s appeals and that his failure to do so created at least an appearance of bias that now warrants a judicial review. SEE MUMIA, PAGE 14

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“Given the history of the prosecutor, given the history of the judge, given the history of “To have the former leader of the District the jury selection, I don’t know anybody who, Attorney’s office decide the outcomes of a with a straight face, could claim this was realdispute involving that office which occurred ly a fair trial. That’s a very difficult claim to during his tenure as District Attorney, gives make,” Bookman said. the appearance of being fundamentally unAbu-Jamal’s foes, notably including the fair, unjust and improper,” wrote Tucker, the Fraternal Order of Police, firmly reject any supervising judge of the court’s criminal trial move for a new trial, saying the defendant has division. filed decades-worth of appeals, all of which Krasner first appealed Tucker’s ruling on have been denied by the courts. Faulkner’s the grounds that it could mean any appellate widow, Maureen, who has frequently and judge would have to be recused from cases emotionally opposed any reconsideration of that he or she had earlier prosecuted. But the case, could not be reached for comment for after Tucker modified his opinion to clarify this story. that the ruling was limited to the Abu-Jamal But his attorney, Widener University law case, Krasner withdrew his appeal, saying the professor Judith Ritter, said Tucker’s ruling supplemental opinion had addressed his conand Krasner’s decision not to oppose it have cerns. created an important opportunity for the deThe DA’s action sparked jubilation among fendant to get a new trial. Abu-Jamal’s supporters, who have been argu“It’s certainly an opening now that we having for years that his 1982 trial en’t had for quite a number of was tainted by a racist judge, years,” she said. “It means we improper jury selection, unrecan get right to the reconsiderliable ballistics evidence and ation of those previous appeals conflicting witness statements. without first having to defend “Who would ever think that Judge Tucker’s decision.” we would see this headline in Tucker’s first ruling, released our lifetime?” wrote Noelle at the end of December, said Hanrahan, a long-time spokesCastille’s participation in the woman for Prison Radio, which panels that rejected the appeals produces commentary by would lead ordinary people to Abu-Jamal and other prisonquestion his impartiality. Those – Philadelphia criminal defense concerns were magnified by a ers. attorney Alan Tauber recently revealed letter from Almost four decades after Police Officer Daniel Faulkner Castille in 1990 to then-Goverwas shot dead at 13th and Locust on Dec. 9, nor Casey, arguing for the speedy issuance of 1981, the man convicted of the crime remains death warrants “to send a clear and dramata cause celebre for campaigners who say he is ic message to all police killers that the death the victim of a racist judicial system that did penalty in Pennsylvania means something.” not grant him a fair trial because it wanted to That letter wasn’t available to the defendant avenge the death of a young, white policeman. in 1998 when he appealed his conviction to the “It was a lightning rod almost from the bePennsylvania Supreme Court, Tucker wrote, ginning,” said Marc Bookman, co-director of saying the letter “at a minimum creates an unthe Atlantic Center for Capital Representaconstitutional appearance of bias.” tion, which opposes the death penalty and juThe appeals under review will include arvenile life-without-parole sentences. He said guments that witnesses were intimidated or the celebrity or notoriety of the case has been offered incentives to testify favorably to the fueled by the killing of a police officer, Abu-Jagovernment, that there was “very clear proof” mal’s association with MOVE – the anti-esof race discrimination in jury selection by the tablishment group whose West Philly house prosecutor, that ballistics testimony relating was bombed by city authorities in 1985 – and to the gun that was fired at Faulkner was not by the books, articles and broadcasts that he as conclusive as when it was presented to the has made from behind bars in a Pennsylvania jury and that Abu-Jamal’s trial lawyer did prison. things that were “prejudicial and wrong,” Rit“Thirty-seven years later, it’s still a promter said. inent, important case for all those reasons,” “All the claims are serious, and they all inBookman said. volve constitutional violations that really prejIn the upcoming review, the judges could udiced the outcome,” she said. reject Abu-Jamal’s claim that Castille’s presShe attributed the case’s continued high ence on the panels that denied the appeals creprofile to her client’s success in sustaining inated bias worthy of a new trial. Or, they could ternational support through his writings and accept the bias claim but uphold the earlier broadcasts, which have highlighted oppresdenials. A third possibility is agreement with sion in many places. both the bias claim and the merits of the ear“It resonates with people, and they are very lier appeals – in which case the inmate would moved by what he says and very disturbed get a new trial, Bookman said. He argued that that after an unfair trial, he has been locked strong evidence exists supporting the claim up for 37 years,” she said. that Abu-Jamal did not get a fair trial in 1982. Both Tucker and Krasner raised the rele-

“He’s almost like a Che Guevara. You see his image and you know what that means.”

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utor, given vance of the case of Terrance Williams, who history of was convicted in 1984 of bludgeoning a man to ybody who, death in a West Oak Lane cemetery. Williams is was real- was sentenced to death. The state Supreme ult claim to Court, including Justice Castille, upheld the sentence in 2014, but the U.S. Supreme Court luding the said two years later that Castille should have reject any recused himself because, as Philly DA, he had endant has overseen the Williams prosecution years bel of which fore. Faulkner’s In a majority opinion, the high court said uently and Williams’s constitutional rights had been vioderation of lated by Castille’s participation in the appeal omment for and ordered that it be re-heard by a new panel of appellate judges, which will not include versity law Castille, who has now retired. er’s ruling With echoes of the Williams case, one of the ose it have questions before the new appeals review will for the de- be whether the Abu-Jamal case rises to that level, said Alan Tauber, a criminal defense athat we hav- torney in Philadelphia. number of To win a new trial, Abu-Jamal’s lawyers are means we going to have to show that there was an error reconsider- in the first trial that affected the jury verdict, ous appeals that the prosecution presented evidence that to defend should not have been allowed or that trial judge Albert Sabo said things that could have ion.” ng, released influenced the jury. Judge Sabo, who died in mber, said 2002, was known as a hard-line pro-prosecuion in the tion judge, who presided over many death penthe appeals alty cases, said Tauber. y people to “You could not get a more extreme governality. Those nified by a etter from hen-Goverissuance of nd dramatt the death mething.” e defendant ction to the cker wrote, ates an un-

15

ment-oriented judge,” Tauber said. “He was without a doubt one of the harshest judges in an era when there were quite a few of them.” Despite the high profile of Abu-Jamal, now 65, the new appeal review likely represents his last, best shot at getting out of prison, given his many appeals up to and including the U.S. Supreme Court, and the high-caliber of his lawyers over the years. “He has been around and around and had some of the best civil defense lawyers working for him, and none of that worked so this is probably his last shot,” Tauber said. He argued that Abu-Jamal’s international celebrity could end up counting against him because he could be easily identified along with any judge that chose to give him a new trial. “Does anybody want to give Mumia a new trial, from a political standpoint?” Tauber said, arguing that any decision to grant a new trial or even to set him free would result in his opponents accusing any such judge of freeing a cop killer. “In turning his case into such a cause celebre, he’s probably made it difficult from a political standpoint for people to stand up for him. He’s almost like a Che Guevara. You see his image and you know what that means.”

@JONAHURDLE

It’s been close to 40 years in which activists and prosecutors alike have been battling over the fate of Mumia Abu Jamal, convicted of killing police officer Daniel Faulkner in 1982. | Image: Wikicommons

include armidated or ably to the lear proof” ction by the ny relating ner was not nted to the lawyer did wrong,” Rit-

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CULTURE

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oel has served 15 years upstate in prison at six penitentiaries. “I got kicked out of five different prisons,” Noel said. “One was, I didn’t even cause no trouble, and they kicked me out. They thought I was the leader of the Latin

CULTURE

contracting jobs here and there, but the work wasn’t steady, and Noel found himself sleeping at friends’ places – friends with whom he had a history of getting into trouble. Some nights he passed out in his boss’ Jeep, though Noel was reluctant to admit his predicament. We drove around his neighborhood in Kings.” my minivan, from Frankford Avenue to CamThe Latin Kings is the oldest and largest bria, Reese, Fairhill, Somerset, and all the othLatino street gang worldwide. Noel told me er streets he ran growing up. he’s a member of the Latin Kings but he’s Noel showed me the school he fought his certainly not the leader locally and way to and from every day. has never been within any spe“This used to be one of the craziest motels you could come cific incarceration setting. But to: prostitutes, drugs,” Noel said the way the Latin Kings rolled when we passed the now-shuttogether and approached life aptered Liberty Motel on Germanpealed to him. town Avenue and Westmore“I’m always going to be honest land Street. “They closed [sic] it with you and be straight up,” he down, they got busted.” said. “The fast lane and the drug At another intersection, a selling and getting high and middle-aged woman with several getting with the women—that missing teeth, Sherry, accosted was intriguing to me. I felt like Noel through his open window. I needed to be part of someShe was furious at some guy thing.” who had apparently sold her As he got older, however, the short on some pills, ground one more arrests he collected, the of them into the dirt and then time separating his incarcer@CHARRISBOND demanded money back for it. “I ations shrank to less than six need someone who can mother months—and the life of the up on his mother fuckin’ ass,” Latin Kings began to feel less she said. “I don’t need someone who can talk, tantalizing. Noel regrets not being around when his mother was sick and dying, and it or I’m going to stick him for real…and if I kill him, I don’t give a fuck.” eats at him that he was also in prison when “I’ll talk to you about that,” Noel replied. his younger brother, Reuben, had his legs am“What does that mean?” I asked as we drove putated after a car accident. Perhaps his worst regret is being a father but not knowing his off. I suspected Noel was going to give the kid an ass-whipping or something of that nature. children. But Noel denied it, saying he was going to “My daughter’s mother: she was something else,” Noel said, chuckling. “We used to have a “sit down” with him instead. “Will he listen to you, this dude?” I asked. do a lot of coke. She used to drive me up the “If he does, good thing,” Noel responded. wall. She would sleep with everybody. When “If he doesn’t, not so good thing.” I [found] out, she started cutting herself. She He didn’t elaborate, but I got the point. Plus, tried to run me over with her car. She was obNoel’s forehead belied the violence of his life sessed. She didn’t want me to go nowhere. I on the streets. He had a long gash streakwas 17 she was 25.” The story of how he met the mother of his ing down into his eyebrow with seven crude stitches, and a wound on the top of his closesecond child was equally as eye-opening. ly-shaved head from someone hitting him “My son’s mother—that was a different stowith a brick. He was jumped, Noel said, bery,” Noel continued. “She was hitting on me because the girl I was with was sleeping with cause he gave his word for someone who owed a debt and didn’t pay it off. her husband. It was friends with benefits but Noel was furious at himself for getting into she caught feelings from that.” He liked her; he really cared for her. But this situation. But he had the last say that he got so used to women cheating on him that morning, beating up a guy with a chair. At first I thought he meant a wooden chair, but relationships became almost meaningless later, when I asked horrified, Noel laughed at to him, By this time, his son is already age 2 me and said that it was plastic, making me feel and “everybody seen [sic] him but me,” Noel lamented. “They say he looks just like me, like only slightly better. I was starting to get edgy, but I took some deep breaths. I could freak out I spit him out.” at home later and never see him again if I felt All of this information arrived from a torrent of phone calls during early spring 2018. that was necessary. Then Noel’s case was dismissed. The prosecuThis story was edited for print. Read Parts tion’s key witness didn’t show up for a hearI&II of Doing Time in full on philadelphiing, so the judge dropped the charges. Noel aweekly.com or the full five-part series on Mewas free to start again. Once Noel hit the outside, I drove to North dium.com. Philly to meet him at a house he was paint@CHARRISBOND ing. He had a friend who was hiring him to do

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Why does a bisexual lifestyle still rank so low on LGBT scale?

I

t’s impossible to discuss bisexuality without bringing up a long list of negative stereotypes. Myths include the idea that bisexuals are secretly gay, indecisive, spreaders of STIs or incapable of monogamy. There’s a gendered component @TIMAREE_LEIGH to these perceptions as well. Bisexual women are presumed to be attention-seeking and may be fetishized by their straight male partners. Bisexual men face perhaps the most social scrutiny and are half as likely to come out as their female counterparts. Culturally, we are also prone to think in binaries: black and white, male and female, gay and straight. It can be difficult for Americans to fathom existences outside clearly defined boxes. This leads to a lot of denials, mislabeling and non-inclusive language—all of which contribute to bisexual erasure. Sometimes bisexual erasure is intentional, like when the argument is made that bisexuals don’t exist or that someone can’t be bisexual unless they’ve met some quota of sexual or relationship experience. Other times, it’s more subtle, like the use of the phrase “gay marriage,” which casually removes the possibility either member of the couple might be bisexual. The problem bleeds into media representation as well. Last year saw a record number of television characters who are openly LGBT, according to the 2018 GLAAD Where We Are on TV Report. Characters who are attracted to multiple genders, whom the report refers to as Bisexual+, make up around a quarter of the queer representation on broadcast and streaming shows. Yet TV’s portrayal doesn’t match reality. Depending on the survey, bisexuals actually outnumber gay men and lesbians combined. This majority is likely to increase in the future: the younger the participants in a survey, the more likely they are to identify as something other than exclusively gay or straight.

TIMAREE SCHMIT

SEE BI, PAGE 21

SHORT END OF THE DICK Under anonymity, these people told us what it’s like living in Philadelphia with a bisexual lifestyle

“I struggle with it – I hesitate at first to tell straight men that I'm dating because it usually devolves into a request for a threesome. Which, under the right circumstances, hell yeah I'm all for it, but it's annoying when that's the first reaction..” – Jamie

“I came out in 2009 while attending high school, and when I came out, so many people started asking me how I knew because they’d been feeling ways they didn’t understand. Same when I came out as nonbinary in 2018. For these reasons, I choose to be as open and loud about my identities as I can.” – CJ

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BI, FROM PAGE 19 “Being bisexual (or In the last several years, more and more pansexual) can be such famous artists are identifying as bisexual, pansexual or sexually fluid. Celebrities like a challenging identity, Janelle Monae, Lady Gaga, Arianna Grande Frank Ocean have made headlines by acbecause I have felt that I and knowledging their dating interests aren’t limited by gender. have needed to scream Despite this real-world prevalence and init from the rooftop to risk creasing visibility, representation is still incredibly rare in many arenas, especially in corporate and governmental leadership. In being called something 2015, Oregon’s Kate Brown was elected the else. Especially as an AFAB first openly bisexual state governor. This year, Arizona’s Kyrsten Sinema made history as the femme, it is a strange first openly bisexual US Senator. Inga Beale, of Lloyds of London, is one of the only dichotomy being seen as CEO openly bisexual corporate executives. According to the Human Rights Campaign, bisexuals straight when I am by are far less likely than people of other orientato come out at work. myself and gay when I am tions What accounts for this disparity? Often, it’s still risky to come out as anywith my partner by the thing other than straight. For those whose and industries are less tolerant general public, when in fact communities of diversity, it may not seem worth the risk. Meanwhile, the gay and lesbian community I'm neither. Growing up can be comparably unwelcoming, sometimes bisexual gave me a feeling treating bisexuals as tourists who jettison their queerness when it’s convenient. of being alone; I did not According to a survey conducted by Adam and Eve, half of the respondents said they come out for years because would not date a bisexual person, with womhaving a harder time with the idea than I struggled with whether I en men. Why does bisexual visibility matter? to research, there are real-world was straight or gay. I now According health ramifications: bisexuals are more likeother orientations to experience menhave so much pride with lytalthan health issues, substance abuse, and be the victims of domestic violence. the terms bisexual and If they are alienated by both straight and culture, bisexuals may feel isolated and pansexual (even with their gay invalidated. According to the largest study the subject to date, based out of La Trobe negative stereotypes), but it on University in Australia, 80 percent of bisexuhas been a long road getting als have considered self-harm and one in four have attempted suicide. These impacts may be magnified if the person is also transgender or here.” – Gracie

“I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone here I’m bi. Out in the LGBT community here, 10+ years and not once said it aloud til this year. And it’s only been to a few close, non-judge Judy friends.” – Erin

otherwise gender variant. What can be done to combat this problem? Medical and mental health professionals need to be aware of the increasing likelihood that their patients might identify as bisexual, and what unique issues this population faces. Openly bisexual role models can help embolden others who are struggling with feeling alone; this is especially true for those who are in business or positions of leadership, not just in entertainment. Organizations and workplaces can be more mindful about inclusivity in their policies, with attention to language choice as a place to start. At the very minimum, we can respect how people choose to identify and not project preconceived notions onto them.

@TIMAREE_LEIGH

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22

PEOPLE

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John O’Hurley, right, and Chuck Damico, Ben FM program director, at the Ben FM offices in Bala Cynwyd. | Image courtesy: Chuck Damico

Saying anything he feels like MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

sneaking B favorite th It’s the soun crisscrossin the voice b thousand ti O’Hurley Ben FM sin phia’s BEN WMMR (93 ety station. first launch Media Grou nate with li “It’s not n it’s also no ing away fr Damico, pro “We wer that could c slightly sar like John O Peterman f the time.” Damico s ing success across the soed him in whole life. Maybe yo classics wh school or pl “Your wi “Never su ry.” “How hig ocean? How Damico s ley is given one-liners the radio. W one-liners t FM can ind behind them “One of at a café,” D know that serts?’ I ask movie line? What’s a fu you read on where,” he In regard persona, O’

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

PEOPLE

Seinfeld actor John O’Hurley is that awesomely familiar voice on 95.7 BEN-FM

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ongtime listeners of Philly’s 95.7 “Ben is a legend in his own mind,” he starts. BEN-FM know all too well the “Much like [Seinfeld’s] J. Peterman, but withfamiliar voice during station out the frequent flyer miles. Ben inhabits the breaks, but do you know to whom world of music, year after year, trying to unit belongs? derstand every new style, but ultimately is It might be after Matt Cord clueless. He is still trying to ‘get jiggy with it’ wraps up Queen, Kristen Herrwhile the world is now ‘ju-ju on that beat.’ He is not a DJ, but the occasional commentator mann puts down Blondie, or while on the world as he sees it – not as it really is. sneaking BEN at work after just hearing your He is the morning drive mock-wisdom favorite throwback from Run DMC. that you listen to, chuckle at and then It’s the sound of John O’Hurley’s voice crisscrossing the airwaves – you know BY JENNY arrive at work grateful that you don’t DEHUFF have to be him for the rest of your day.” the voice because you’ve heard it a Today, O’Hurley owns part of the J. thousand times. Peterman Company with entrepreneur O’Hurley has been a mainstay with Ben FM since its inception in 2005. Philadel- John Peterman. The retailer declared bankphia’s BEN-FM (95.7-FM), the sister station of ruptcy in 1999 after “Seinfeld” went off the air. WMMR (93.3-FM), is the city’s adult hits vari- The actor told Chicago’s “the U,” “I guess you ety station. Fifteen years ago, when the station could say I liked the role so much, I bought the first launched, Greater Media (now Beasley company.” Those who tune in regularly to Philly’s No. Media Group) sought a name that would reso1 station playing a mix of 1970s, 80s and 90s nate with listeners. It became “Ben.” hits probably know O’Hurley’s voice as part “It’s not necessarily after Ben Franklin, but it’s also not honoring Ben Franklin – or shy- of the daily drumbeat. That’s not by design, ing away from any association,” said Chuck says Damico, but he’s the guy who helps bring “Ben’s” personality to the station – the one Damico, program director for BEN-FM. who helps give it an identity. “We were looking for a standout character “John has been a huge part of our rating that could carry a really fun attitude – maybe success over the years,” he said. “And like slightly sarcastic, but relatable – and an actor like John O’Hurley and a character like Mr. every company, we survey the audience, and Peterman from ‘Seinfeld’ was very popular at year after year, it comes back that they love hearing him on the radio.” the time.” Tony Maddox (aka “Shoes”) is the imaging Damico said that O’Hurley had been enjoydirector for BEN-FM. He’s the guy who sits ing success doing this kind of work at stations across the country for years, so BEN-FM las- down with O’Hurley and records the scripts for various station spots. Maddox shared an soed him in, too. He’s been with the station its “awkward” story about how, one time, O’Hurwhole life. ley was scheduled to do a Ben FM recording Maybe you’ve heard some of these BEN-FM after an on-air appearance promoting the Naclassics while listening on your way to work, tional Dog Show. En route to the studio, hunschool or play: ger pangs set in, and someone fetched O’Hur“Your wingman and your thigh master.” ley a pizza slice. “Never sure if we should say thanks…or sor“I escorted John to the studio, which, after ry.” “How high is the mountain? How wet is the the frantic post-show scene, was almost palpably silent – these are, after all, acoustically ocean? How BEN is BEN FM?!” treated recording studios,” Maddox said. “I Damico said that, for the most part, O’Hurley is given a script from the station for these got him settled at his microphone, and just as I was about to start our recording session, one-liners you hear in between songs on someone [arrived] with John’s pizza…So, for the radio. With anyone permitted to submit one-liners to the station and from what BEN- the next five minutes, I sat in silence in a virtually sound-proof room, pretending not to lisFM can independently source, the inspiration ten to John O’Hurley eat a slice of pizza while behind them can come from anywhere. waiting for him to read a script for the station. “One of my favorites came from a counter I guess I could have excused myself from the at a café,” Damico recalled. “It [read], ‘Did you know that stressed spelled backward is des- booth, but I didn’t want to leave in case he serts?’ I ask people, ‘What’s your favorite 80s needed anything. He’s a very efficient, and movie line? What’s your favorite song lyric? mostly quiet eater. So, yeah, awkward pizza. That’s my story.” What’s a funny thing your kid said? What did And in the words of O’Hurley: “With 95.7 on you read on the bus? They can come from anythe menu, who needs dessert?” where,” he said. In regards to how he feels about his BEN @RUFFTUFFDH persona, O’Hurley had plenty to say.

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

FOOD · GREASE POLE COMPETITION · 3 STAGES LIVE ENTERTAINMENT · MORE FOOD HALFBALL TOURNAMENT · PROCESSION OF THE SAINTS · DID WE MENTION FOOD?

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25

PLACES YOU'VE NEVER BEEN

Champion of the Bored & Lonely

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It Wasn’t Just a Phase. May 16th, 2019

Today I was walking down 2nd St and I found an entire unopened box of Ritz

Crackers on a bench. I looked around and there was no-one in sight. I placed them in my bag. About a mile later, heading south across Girard, I spied an entire unopened block of Cabot Hunter’s Reserve cheddar, just sitting there on the sidewalk in front of God and everyone. So I’m here to tell you, fair reader, that as your eyes eddy over the words of this here blurb, people are dropping all kinds of useful things all over the damn city! Get out there and find some cool stuff, ya dingus! There are untold treasures collecting dust and detritus in every corner of Philadelphia.

WELCOME TO THE JUMBLE STOOCUP PLOINDH CREEHCK VAINTE DRONEY Why do wolves eat raw meat?

House show gal- How many copies of Gravity's Rainbow are in this house? guy- Between three and five. Center City office building gal, entering hallway- It smells like poop AS FUCK out here!

Kensington, out and about guy- (delivered with zero irony) Yo Shawn! Can you get me a $20,000 loan? I need one. 10 & South St guy to friend- Yeah we used to fight a lot, but that’s just because she found out I fucked her mom.

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For solutions to this puzzle and others, visit philadelphiaweekly.com 50. Big Lebowski’s right-hand temporal location (abbr) left-rights man 21. The poison is itchy 1. What the president does to 51. Went from dom to sub, or 23. Occurs in actuality pussies. visa versa 26. Big dude in Enter the 5. Murders 56. To produce and deposit Dragon 9. Product of the Krebs cycle an egg 27. Start over from scratch (abbr) 57. Established by Greeks, 28. Reads disks in a computer 12. Anagram of RAGIS (sorry. conquered by Turks (abbr) crappy clue) 29. What judges make you do 14. Oldest city in Northern Italy 59. In music, soft 60. Had a thing for apples 30. To direct to a certain source 16. The Souphanousinphone 61. Requirements 33. Reflected sound family in Arlen 34. To allow to be seen 17. The general atmosphere of 62. What heat treatment does to a strand of hair 35. Common K-9 command Twitter 63. German masculine definite 37. Will Smith’s new film 18. A distinguishing feature article 38. South Philly sauce staples 19. Expert military pilot 64. Journey-starting action 41. Lacking the thiccness 20. Recognizing the Old Gods 65. Old folks 44. This plus 39 across is a slow, 22. Alternative to the stick smooth exercise 24. 11th month minus up-downs 45. Where websites live (abbr) smoldering coal 1. Grasping pressure 46. Directions and 25. Useful things in video 2. Contemporary Irish terrorist requirements for a certain games group (abbr) outcome 26. Slowness of the heart 3. Eager anticipation 47. Persist against an 31. How most people know 4. Long yellow berry adversarial force Norma McCorvey 5. Makes a definite choice 48. One who puts bricks in 32. The deepest sleep 6. Cultivate for collection their place 36. Old age, or antiquity 7. Imposes food standards 50. Stained the ground red 37. Trivial or paltry thing (2 (abbr) 51. A particular, defined team words) 8. Of a mind to cease existing 52. Tends to vote republican 39. Vital, Taoist force 9. Siren or claxon (abbr) 40. Story of shaking things up 10. Are usually cheaper on 53. Requires a pass to traverse with dancing Tuesdays during class 42. Total dime piece 11. Lyrical expresser of 54. Ghost World protagonist 43. World’s Strongest Man perceptions 55. Tittles event (2 words) 13. Council of religious officials 58. Overall 47. A city in North Algeria 15. Occurring at a specific 49. Consumed

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

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THUR M AY 1 6

LEARN

Battered, Beaten & Bruised: Case Studies in Forensic Anthropology

THE SCENE A WEEK'S WORTH OF ADVENTURES A C R O S S P H I L LY N E I G H B O R H O O D S

Italian Festival

Star Party

Big Mouth: Philadelphia’s Lip Sync Tournament

Lip sync for your LIFE! Just kidding, it’s not that serious. It’s just for a huge cash prize. So, no big deal, really. | 7 pm. $10. L’Etage, 624 S. 6th St. eventbrite.com

This psychedelic rock group has drifted in from Rockaway Beach. They’re here to let us know that they’ve got an album, “Interstella,” coming out some time very soon. In the meantime, just jam to their November single “Seize the Day.” | 8 pm. $14. MilkBoy, 1100 Chestnut St.

Next Slide, Please: A Show of Slideshows

OUTDOORS

COMPETITION

Blac Rabbit

COMEDY

eventbrite.com

facebook.com

MUSIC

ticketfly.com

Don’t get scared by how science-y this jawn sounds. Basically, you get to look at really old, damaged bones and draw conclusions about human violence. This isn’t something you could just do in your backyard with free expert advice. | 6 pm. Free. Wagner Free Institute of Science, 1700 W. Montgomery Ave.

We can never really see shit in the sky from Philly, but hopefully this will be a clear night. Bring your own blanket for the first official night under the stars at this park. The Franklin Institute astronomy team will help us identify exactly what we’re all staring at. | 7:30 pm. Free. The Rail Park, 1300 Noble St.

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

The most extravagant display of Italian culture and its influence in Philly is once again going down all weekend. This annual party along South 9th Street is driven by authentic food, music and arrives complete with a greased pole climbing contest. The celebration doesn’t get completely lost in the (pasta) sauce, though. On Sunday, the time-honored tradition of the Roman Catholic Procession of Saints – in which church parishioners walk through the neighborhood holding statues of saints – is scheduled to take place. We’re not sure how anyone is going to climb a pole after stuffing themselves with alcohol and food, but suppose that’s part of what makes this festival definitely worth checking out. The half-ball tournament seems pretty dope, too – it’s like baseball, but the ball’s literally cut in half and you use a broomstick to hit it. We love how this festival stays true to Philly traditions. It’s why we’ll see you there. WHAT: South 9th Street Italian Market Festival WHEN: May 18-19 COST: Prices vary WHERE: 919 S. 9th St. MORE: italianmarketfestival.com

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

Our PowerPoint-happy professors used to make our college classes so fucking monotonous. These comedians will bring some respect back to the most efficient way to present information. We can’t picture how this will go, but we guess you’ll have to wait for the next slide to figure it out. | 7 pm. $5. Philly Improv Theater, 2030 Sansom St. eventbrite.com MUSIC

Andy Black

The sultry emo guy of our teenage dreams. Formerly the lead singer of Black Veil Brides, Black has made a name for himself with a solo music career. He just released his second album “The Ghost of Ohio” in April. | 7:30 pm. $28.50. Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St. ticketfly.com

is the first meetup of many for a group dedicated to developing all kinds of writing. It’s always easier when you have people read your work and let you know if it sucks. | 7 pm. $5-$15. A Novel Idea, 1726 E. Passyunk Ave. facebook.com MUSIC

Winter

We’d hate to remind you, but winter is coming real soon. It’ll actually be here in full force this spring. Confused? Don’t be. Just be here as this storm of a band blows into town and sweeps us all away. | 9 pm. $10. Everybody Hits, 529 W. Girard Ave. zticketfly.com

FRI M AY 1 7

MUSIC

Rodrigo y Gabriela

entertainmen the money yo towards hom so don’t be so | 7:30 pm. $15 Terminal Mar St. voadv.org

This acoustic duo has a PARTY history of selling out venues, like Red Rocks and the Royal Albert Hall. They’re also no stranger to success - they Get hit in the were invited by President queer bops fo Obama to perform at a This is a mon reception for the President of party that giv Mexico in 2010. Their intense earned to a di each month. T strums hit deep through speakers, so we could only charity is the imagine how impactful their Dyke March rally for the vi live performances are. | 8 pm. $40. Franklin Music Hall, self-identified Free. Dahlak P 421 N. 7th St. Baltimore Ave facebook.com facebook.co

Fistful Kisses

FUNDRAISER INTERESTS

A Community Writing Group Meetup All event titles should be this self-explanatory. This

Give After Dark MUSIC You should give whenever Tash Su you can, but after dark is a pretty good time to do it. Wander through Reading after hours and be enticed by the open bar and by the

The one-pers to make you w the fuck do th Sultana litera look all too ea

CALENDAR

LYWEEKLYPHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

COMEDY

Rob Lowe

Where do we even begin with this guy? From “The Outsiders” to “Parks and Recreation,” Lowe has cemented himself in our memories. Remember that sex tape, too? Pretty legendary, but he probably doesn’t want you to remember that, so just try not to bring it up if you go to see him. | Friday, 8 pm. $49. Merriam Theater, 250 S. Broad St. kimmelcenter.org

entertainment provided. All the money you spend will go towards homeless families, so don’t be so conservative. | 7:30 pm. $150. Reading Terminal Market, 51 N. 12th St. voadv.org

guitar, vocals, synth and keys all by themselves. The hard work effortlessly pays off in harmony to create a dreamy universe of poppy soft rock in every song. | 8 pm. $29.50. The Met Philly, 858 N. Broad St. facebook.com

PARTY

Fistful of Kisses

Get hit in the face with some queer bops for a good cause. This is a monthly dance party that gives all donations earned to a different charity each month. This month’s charity is the Philadelphia Dyke March - an annual rally for the visibility of self-identified dykes. | 10 pm. Free. Dahlak Paradise, 4708 Baltimore Ave.

phlex.club

MUSIC

The Floozies

Your favorite whores have rolled into town. This band of brothers is dedicated to getting funkier with every set they play. As evident through their latest 2018 single “I Want It All,” this duo’s music is uninhibited electro craziness. | 8:30 pm. $20. Theatre of the Living Arts, 334 South St. facebook.com

facebook.com DANCE MUSIC

Tash Sultana

The one-person band is here to make you wonder, “how the fuck do they do all that?” Sultana literally makes it look all too easy by taking on

local jazz musicians. Force someone to dance with you and you could make a new friend. Good music is simply supposed to get you moving, so if any of these bands playing are any good, you’ll be bouncing off the walls the whole weekend. | 8 pm. Prices vary. Locations vary.

PHLeX: Philadelphia Lindy Hop Exchange

LGBTQ

The Wedding of Ruby and Sapphire: A Steven Universe Drag Show

We are gathered here today to join some drag queens for a sickening show. Your ticket price also gets you some free wedding cake. Dress in your formal best for this celebration of love. | 10 pm. $20. The Victoria Freehouse, 10 S. Front St. eventbrite.com

Dance all weekend long to the talented stylings of

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

Tash Sultana

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28 X

CALENDAR

SAT M AY 1 8

PARTY

Pon De Barbary

Some reggae, some Sean Paul, a little Major Lazer. This is one of those dance parties you don’t have to feel guilty about getting too lit at. The host - There’s Drinking to Be Done - already knows what you’re going to be doing at this party. | 10 pm. $5-$7. The Barbary, 951 Frankford Ave.

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY PARTY

Bloom & Bass Pool Party

Now that the sun is coming out, you should be, too. Daybreaker is here to remind you that dance parties are scientifically proven to benefit our health and happiness. Shake off that winter and early spring depression with a good game of Marco Polo. | 9 am. $15$35. Vesper Day Club, 1031 Germantown Ave. daybreaker.com

facebook.com

MUSIC

Addiction: Bach & Brown

Technology is fucking destroying us - not surprising. This is the world premiere of the musical performance “Phony,” which is about a couple meeting for dinner with nothing to talk about. It all relates to how addicted we are to modern technology. It hits pretty close to home, but if you wanna stay woke, you should probably check this out. | 8 pm. $30. Carpenter’s Historic Hall, 320 Chestnut St. eventbrite.com

Peddler’s Village Strawberry Festival

FESTIVAL

Peddler’s Village Strawberry Festival

Forty-first time’s the charm. This annual festival celebrates all things about the juicy fruit. There will be the usual food, drinks and family friendly activities. If you aren’t absolutely sick of strawberries at the end, then you didn’t do it right. | 10 am. Free. Peddler’s Village, 2400 Street Rd. peddlersvillage.com MUSIC

Lawn Jawn

Yup, that’s exactly what it is. To dig a little deeper, though, it’s a music and arts festival. Local bands and artists will be turning it out on a small area of grass on Drexel’s campus. Luckily, this is open to the public. | 1 pm. Free. Race Lawn, 3310 Race St. facebook.com

PARTY

Color (Scheme): A Queer Day Party

The newest party for queer and trans people of color. This jawn is really serious about people celebrating their identity while supporting other POC. There will be drinks, hip-hop and trap music, and a black art exhibition. Just show up and turn up for a great time. | 1:30 pm. $10. Haute Restaurant & Lounge, 1420 Locust St. eventbrite.com INTERESTS

Spirit, Soul & Body Vendor Expo

It’s never enough to just take care of your physical body. This is the perfect event for anyone who needs to rejuvenate themselves completely. There will be several vendors here focused on helping you to heal your mind, body and spirit. | 1 pm. $20. Courtyard by Marriott, 4100 Presidential Blvd.

Brunch So Hard

FOOD & DRINK

(Not Just) Wheat Beer Fest

Lots of local bands and breweries will be serving up their best at this fest. ” We’re guessing there will be some great beers offered for our gluten-free friends to enjoy. | 12 pm. Prices vary. South Philadelphia Tap Room, 1509 Mifflin St. facebook.com

We’re shedding a tear for the fallen. You better come out to the last blowout show at the legendary theater. A fat bill of local bands, like The Three 4 Tens and Alright Junior, will be performing all day. | 2:15 pm. $15. The Trocadero, 1003 Arch St. ticketfly.com

SUN M AY 1 9

eventbrite.com MUSIC

Joe Jack Talcum

He was the frontman of the punk band “The Dead Milkmen,” but he’s been flying solo for a while and blessing us with his guitar ever since. He’ll be splitting the bill with S.T.A.R.W.O.O.D and F. Woods and the Fellow Humans. Are you a human too? Well, perfect - this is just the show for you. | 4:30 pm. $10. PhilaMOCA, 531 N. 12th St. ticketfly.com

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

MUSIC

Rock at the Troc

PARTY

Brunch So Hard

Motherfuckers ‘gon find you... on a boat, with a mimosa in your hand. This is a full on party aboard the Spirit of Philadelphia with drinks, games and live performances for your nerves. That shit sound cray enough for you? | 11 am. $80. Spirit of Philadelphia, 401 S. Christopher Columbus Blvd. eventbrite.com

CALENDAR

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MON M AY 2 0

FUNDRAISER

Ladyblades: End Abuse

This axe throwing tournament will benefit Women Against Abuse. Say “fuck you” to physical violence by throwing an axe right in its face. | 6 pm. $45. Urban Axes, 2019 E. Boston St. facebook.com

MUSIC

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MUSIC

MONO

They have released an album every few years or so since forming in 1999, their most recent being “Nowhere Now Here” which dropped in January. These Japanese rockers go on a world tour every year, and at this point, have visited over 57 countries. It sounds like it’d be fun to take a trip with them. | 8:30 pm. $10. Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. facebook.com

The Royal Treatment

This luckily has nothing to do with the royal family that we don’t really give a shit about. It’s a night of songs from music’s most memorable artists sung by Philly musicians. Aretha, MJ, Prince… all the artists we’d bow down to. Party like you’re at the Palace. | 7:30 pm. $20. L’Etage, 624 S. 6th St. facebook.com

MUSIC

Assuming We Survive

If we do, we’re going to this fucking show. This band is a pop punk powerhouse that has worked its way up through the ranks since 2007. These guys are actually playing a show with Sum 41 later this month. Check out their EP “Chapters” from 2018 before coming out. | Sunday, 6:30 pm. $12. Voltage Lounge, 421 N. 7th St. facebook.com

PARTY

Nitty Gritty: Dirty Dancing 60s Dance Party

Maybe all the new music out is too shitty for you. Maybe the songs of the 50s and 60s are some of your guilty pleasures. Maybe you’re just old. We don’t really give a shit what your reason for coming out to this is. Just come out - you’ll have the time of your life. | 10 pm. $5. Tabu Lounge & Sports Bar, 254 S. 12th St. facebook.com PARTY

The Thrifty Disco

This jawn seems pretty nifty.

Philly AIDS will turn into a club after hours and three DJs from 97.1 WKDU will spin tracks. All the cash made from this night will be given to Bebashi Transition to Hope, a nonprofit focused on awareness for hunger relief and breast and sexual health. | 9 pm. Prices vary. Philly AIDS Thrift, 710 S. 5th St. facebook.com FUNDRAISER

Cocktails for Kitties

Have a drink or two - for the sake of the cats. This is a fundraiser for the Stray Cat Relief Fund to celebrate all their efforts in taking care of cats and their successes. You basically have no soul if you don’t wanna come out and

support this event. | 11 am. $40. Seer Interactive, 1033 N. 2nd St. eventbrite.com PARTY

Yavideo’s The Cookout

This is so “old skool” that you have to be 25 and over to enter. You know the drill - 80s and 90s hip hop and R&B music, food and games. Grammy nominated artist Mr Cheeks will be performing, and there will be “Yatta Yatta punch,” whatever the hell that is. | 7 pm. $20. Mad Rex, 1000 Frankford Ave.

EVENT

Claim Malcolm X Day

Gather with your community to celebrate X’s birthday at the park named in his honor. Guests speakers, live entertainment, and areas for children and wellness will fill up your day. Show your face and throw your fist in the air. | 12 pm. Free. Malcolm X Park, 400 S. 51st St.

Cocktails for Kitties

facebook.com

eventbrite.com

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

30 X

CALENDAR

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY DISCUSSION

MUSIC

Anderson .Paak and The Free Nationals

If only we all had as much energy as this guy. He’s collaborated with huge artists like Mac Miller and Chance the Rapper throughout his short career so far. He just keeps getting better with every album he drops - his elevation as an artist is obvious in “Ventura,” which came out this April. | Tuesday, 7:30 pm. $29.50. The Met Philly, 858 N. Broad St. livenation.com

Privacy, Politics and Protests

Recently, it’s like our social media usage has been reduced to sharing dumbass memes with our friends. Although we know it’s melting our brains, social media has played several influential roles in our lives, like helping to organize social movements such as Black Lives Matter. Sit down for a discussion on just how it’s played a role in the three Ps above. | 5:30 pm. $35. World Affairs Council of Philadelphia, 1 S. Broad St.

COMEDY

Early Evening Late Show

You don’t have to go to NYC to sit in the audience of a late night show. Host Kristen DeWitt will own the late night format in this hour of comedy and variety. If you’re one of those people that gets all their news from Colbert or Fallon, you’ll probably love this. | 7:30 pm. $5. Philly Improv Theater, 2030 Sansom St. eventbrite.com

Linguistics of Love MUSIC

American Football

Toss the pigskin around with these down-to-earth guys that have been around for about 20 years. They had an EP and a self-titled album in the 90s that didn’t do so well at the time, but later were considered to be quintessential emo. After splitting up and getting back together in 2014, much to the joy of emos worldwide, they continued to make tour and make music and released two more selftitled LPs. | Tuesday, 8:30 pm. $25. Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. utphilly.com

You know we love you, but we just don’t know how to express it. This workshop will teach you how to communicate your love and appreciation for your significant other. Pre-written greeting cards and teddy bears don’t mean shit - you gotta say what you feel. | 6 pm. Prices vary. Fishtown Wellness Center, 430 Belgrade St. eventbrite.com MUSIC

Worriers

Like this band, we’re all punks worrying about something. They’re not afraid to get political with their music, which we definitely love. Having toured with The Wonder Years in the past, the four members are familiar with Philly. | 7 pm. $10. PhilaMOCA, 531 N. 12th St. facebook.com

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

These girls give us some Red Hot Chili Peppers experimental vibes. Their music is transcendental art rock that has some serious other-worldly qualities to it. We haven’t heard anything new from them since 2016, but keep an ear out. | 8:30 pm. $27.50. Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St. ticketfly.com MUSIC

Past Life

TUES M AY 2 1

facebook.com LEARN

MUSIC

Warpaint

PARTY

Election Night Party

Let’s get fucking lit off freedom and democracy! After you vote in the Philly Primary, let loose at this celebration of all the work our public servants have done to preserve democracy in our beautiful city. The drinks will keep on coming as the results come pouring in. | 8 pm. Free. Love City Brewing, 1023 Hamilton St. ticketleap.com MUSIC

Woofstock

The summer concert series everyone is barking about is back for the season. There will be outdoor performances from a rotating roster of local bands. Let your pups run free as you let loose in the park every Tuesday for the rest of the summer. | 5:30 pm. Free. Seger Dog Park, 1001 Rodman St. facebook.com

These Philly guys formed in 2016 - they’re just baby indie rockers. Since then, they’ve released two EPs, the latest of which was released with Mad Dragon Music Group, Drexel University’s studentrun record label. Come out and witness a band that has truly created their own kind of sound. | 7 pm. $7. The Barbary, 951 Frankford Ave. eventbrite.com LEARN

Nature Photography DIY Workshop

Having a macro lens will usually make any nature picture look legit, but if you want to learn how to do it the proper way, this is the right class for you. Wander through one of Philly’s lush forest areas and learn how to capture the beauty you see. | 6:30 pm. $15. Schuylkill Center for Environmental Education, 8480 Hagy’s Mill Rd. schuylkillcenter.org

CALENDAR

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WED M AY 2 2

EVENT

ACLU Greater Philadelphia Chapter Annual Gathering

Let’s check in and see the social progress we have made. It may not be much, but at this event, we’ll figure out how to keep moving forward. The Deputy Director of the ACLU’s racial justice program will speak on criminal justice reform, while the executive director warns us of the challenges in the way of progress. | 5:30 pm. Prices vary. ACLU of Pennsylvania, 1800 John F. Kennedy Blvd. facebook.com

LGBTQ

Plus One: A Brand New Drag Show

This is the very first party of many for this monthly show. Join a different DJ and diva every month for a different kind of experience every time. Maybe you’ll even bring a different plus one to each of them - we won’t judge. | 10 pm. Free. The Dolphin Tavern, 1539 S. Broad St. facebook.com MUSIC

Jonatha Brooke

Brooke is a folk queen of past and present. She’s been in the game since the 90s and found some major success when she did two songs for the 2002 film “Return to Neverland.” She’ll probably be playing some new music from her EP “Imposter” that came out this April. | 8 pm. $30. World Cafe Live, 3025 Walnut St. ticketfly.com

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PARTY

Soul Cruisers Dance Party

A classy affair for your Wednesday night pleasure. The Sensational Soul Cruisers are an elevenpiece horn band playing all the essential music of the 60s-80s. From Motown to, of course, soul, these smooth criminals know how to get us in a horny mood. | 8 pm. Prices vary. Morgan’s Pier, 221 N. Christopher Columbus Blvd. facebook.com ART

You Can’t Fail

This is an art series featuring works from over 20 local creators. Experience all types of creative expression through all kinds of mediums - photography, dance, comedy, sculpture, etc. The only way you can possibly fail is by missing out on this. | 8 pm. Free. Tattooed Mom, 530 South St. facebook.com

You Can’t Fail

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

32 X

CALENDAR

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY LEARN

Claiming Your Identity: An Otherness Workshop

When you know you’re different from others, it sucks to know you’ll never exactly fit in. Through the Japanese art of taiko, the topic of “otherness-” how we have been singled out from “others-” will be explored. Move freely to the intense drum beats and dig deep into your story. Your openness could make one less person feel like an outcast. | 6:30 pm. Free. Asian Arts Initiative, 1219 Vine St. facebook.com MUSIC

Fake Pockets

Can we just talk about how useless fake pockets on clothes are? They’re just despicable. Anyway, this isn’t about that. Fake Pockets is an indie rock band from Asbury Park. They’re so underground, in fact, that they only have two singles released on all their streaming platforms. | 8 pm. $12. The Fire, 412 W. Girard Ave. facebook.com INTERESTS

Curator Fest

Betty Who

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

If you create things, hang at this collaborative event and meet other creatives. Photographers, designers, artists and DJs all can’t do their jobs completely without some creative help from others. Great minds think alike, and any great Philly artists looking to make

some connections will all think of going to this. | 8 pm. $10. Voltage Lounge, 421 N. 7th St. eventbrite.com

THUR M AY 2 3

Joanne Shaw Taylor

MUSIC

Betty Who

Betty’s been through it all in her music career. She’s been signed to a major record label, and even created the theme song for the second season of Queer Eye. But she’s broken free of all that and is flexing her indie pop wings while being free of any labels. | 8:30 pm. $21. Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. etix.com MUSIC

Archspire

Heavy fucking metal times four. Archspire and the three supporting artists on this bill are touring the whole country in less than a month. The Vancouver native band be playing their newest album “Relentless Mutation” in full. | 6 pm. $18. Voltage Lounge, 421 N. 7th St. ticketweb.com FOOD & DRINK

The Community Table

There isn’t enough events out there that are simply about sitting down and making conversation. That’s exactly what this jawn is, though. It’s a mostly homecooked dinner hosted by a local business coach who just wants to bring a community together. Would you pass the

potatoes over to us, please? | 6 pm. $43. The Collective Table, 218 Market St. eventbrite.com

pm. $10. Science History Institute, 315 Chestnut St. eventbrite.com LEARN

PERFORMANCE

Fox Chase Boy

An anything goes, solo performance about the life of a Philly native. It seems like Gerard Argeros is going to cover everything about his life story, from his super personal issues to the political and cultural climate of his coming of age. Be ready for a candid and crazy storytime. | 7 pm. Free. Maas Building, 1325 N. Randolph St. eventbrite.com LEARN

Pick Your Own Path

We’re not sure we ever want to feel like we’re living during the Cold War again. Honestly, though, there’s always scary political tension going on today, anyway. This is a choose your own adventure type of event that puts you in the shoes of a 50s cowboy during the Uranium boom. Use your wits to make different decisions than those that were made during the USSR arms race. | 6

How to Ask for Money (Without Shame)

We think we’ve all shamefully asked for money before. This event isn’t really about how to ask your parents for money when you’re in your 20s - it’s more so for organizations and getting funding for ideas. More grown-up, and important, than you would think. | 6 pm. Prices vary. Cultureworks Greater Philadelphia, 1315 Walnut St. ticketleap.com MUSIC

Joanne Shaw Taylor

Taylor’s pretty damn big in the UK, and she’s set on being just as famous across the pond. She’s a solo blues artist who started out in 2009 and is not stopping any time soon. She actually just released a single, “All My Love,” this past week. | 8 pm. $25. World Cafe Live, 3025 Walnut St.

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

CALENDAR

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FOOD & DRINK

Guac Off 2019

You won’t feel guilty about binging on unlimited chips and guac here. When it’s all for a good cause, you can’t hold back. This culinary competition of local restaurants’ best guac is all to benefit MANNA, an organization that prepares meals for people with life-threatening illnesses. | 6 pm. $35. Morgan’s Pier, 221 N. Christopher Columbus Blvd. mannapa.org

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

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THE

BIG

PICTURE

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

Stuntin on' em A bit of that ol' bike life by the Philadelphia Museum of Art is our offering for this week. This gem comes by courtesy of Philly-based photographer Brian Gambescia. Want to have your favorite shot considered for an upcoming Big Pic? Send it to us, or just hashtag it #PWBigPic on Instagram or Twitter. MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

SAVAGE LOVE

Disclosed Q: Garbage human here. I’ve had herpes Momo and Felix are the co-creators of My for about 15 years. The first five years, I was Boyfriend Has Herpes (Instagram: @my_boyin a relationship with a guy who also had it. friend_has_herpes), an account that has The last 10 years, I haven’t been in a serious amassed more than 15,000 followers in just a relationship. I’ve been a (rare, drunk) onefew months. Using simple, direct prose and night-stand type of gal, and I don’t usually tell Momo’s charming illustrations, Momo and Fethe guy because, like, everyone has herpes. (I lix educate others about herpes while sharing get that one in five isn’t everyone, but if you the story of their relationship—from how they count HSV-1? I’ve seen numbers as high as 80 met, to Felix’s disclosure, to Momo’s initial percent.) Frankly, it seems about as signifihesitation to get involved with someone who cant medically as minimally contagious mild has herpes. “Our stance is pro-disclosure, alacne. (Some risks to pregnancies and immunosuppressed people ways, but we know this isn’t possible exist, and I know logically it’s not for everyone living with HSV,” said my call to determine what may be Momo and Felix. “Unfortunately, serious for someone else.) I justione of the significant pitfalls of [not disclosing early on] is the difficulfy nondisclosure to myself these ways, even though I know it’s not ty it adds to the potential of a longethical. On the occasions where I term relationship. And while we have disclosed, I’ve been made to don’t agree with DTBA’s choice to feel like a leper by dudes who 10 not disclose to her partners, we unminutes before were begging me derstand why she might have made not to have to use a condom. I obthose choices. The stigma against herpes is terrible.” viously have a lot of resentment over having this stupid thing and Momo and Felix both feel—and over the guilt I have around nonI’m with them—that you need to be completely honest with this guy, disclosure, and I suspect my hiseven if it means the relationship tory of casual sex is influenced @FAKEDANSAVAGE could end. But it might not end, by not wanting to deal with this DTBA. He might have a disclosure conversation. Which brings us to of his own to make—he could have herpes, now. What I thought was a one-night stand has turned into a months-long affair, and I’m too—or the relationship could end for other reasons. You’ve been dating this guy for only a amazed to report I find myself liking and respecting this guy. (I know, I know: If I really few months, and he could decide to end things respected him, I’d have told him before I ever for reasons that have nothing to do with the disclosure you’re about to make and/or your knew I respected him). What do I do? I have failure to make it sooner. Or you might learn to tell him. But how? Is there any justification something about him down the road that’s a for what I’ve done? Can I just say, “Oh man, deal breaker. (Have you searched his place for I noticed a thing and went and got tested and guess what?” That just adds to the lie. There’s MAGA hats?) So how do you broach this topic? no way I can have a relationship with this guy “She obviously cares about this person,” based on trust going forward, is there? I’ve fucked this up and I have to bail, don’t I? Am I wrote Momo and Felix. “She made a mistake and she wants to make it right. DTBA needs going to be alone for the rest of my life? to acknowledge her actions (opting for nondis– Deserves To Be Alone closure) and their impact (putting her partner You’re not a garbage human, DTBA. You at risk without his informed consent). DTBA’s didn’t share something you should’ve—the partner may very likely feel betrayed or defact that you, like upwards of 50 percent of evceived. He might want to end the relationship, eryone, have herpes—but weren’t obligated to. and his feelings would be valid. Unfortunately, The problem with not disclosing, as you now all that DTBA can do is acknowledge her misknow, is that casual sex partners have a way take, make herself vulnerable, and accept his of becoming potential long-term partners. reaction.” And by the time you recognize someone’s “But whatever happens, she doesn’t deserve long-term potential, the stakes are so high to be alone,” they said. “We all make mistakes, that bailing looks like an easier option. and we all have the opportunity to do better.” “We don’t think DTBA needs to bail,” Momo THERE’S ALWAYS MORE SAVAGE TO LOVE! and Felix wrote in a joint e-mail after reading Read: PhillyWeekly.com your letter. “And we don’t think she’s destined Have a question?: mail@savagelove.net to be alone for the rest of her life.”

DAN SAVAGE

Hookups =

Visit www.squirt.org to hook up today

NICE RACKS

REACH OUT TO US. Carry PW’s at your spot. drops@philadelphiaweekly.com.

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

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MARKETPLACE

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

MARKETPLACE FOR RENT

EMPLOYMENT

Apartments for Rent

General Employment

8500 BUSTLETON AVE. Corner of Evart St. Spring Special 1BR, $850, 2BR, $1,000 water & gas incld. 215-742-2261 Grant Garden Apartments Spring Special, 1 & 2 BR, 1 BA. $775 - $980 includes water. Laundry room on site. Off of Blvd. 215-464-6411 Apartments for Rent 25XX S. Broad St. Newly renovated 2 br, 1 ba apt. 2nd fl. Brand new kit., h/w floors, and new appliances. Located minutes from subway, bus and major highways. Walking distance to stadiums, Passyunk Ave. and shopping. $1625 mo., tenant pays gas & elec. First, last & 1 mo. sec. dep. to move in. Email: nbtab@aol.com NOTICES Legal Notices

Notice Of Public Sale: The following self-storage Cube contents containing household and other goods will be sold for cash by CubeSmart, 501 Callowhill Street Philadelphia PA 19123 (215) 627-3510 to satisfy a lien on June 4, 2019 at approx. 11AM at www.storagetreasures.com: Unit 1048 Maurice Hall/F S Jeans EMPLOYMENT General Employment

AB BLOOD DONORS NEEDED Will be compensated up to $85.00 for a complete donation, starting on their 2nd visit!! In order to donate you need: Valid picture ID. SSI card Be between 18 & 70 yrs. old. Be in good health. Walk-ins are welcome. New donors will be paid $50.00 for a full donation. INTERSTATE BLOOD BANK 1250 N. BROAD STREET. PHILA PA. 19121 215-765-2554

NOTICES General Employment

Non-CDL Drivers

Wanted

$400

Sign-On Bonus

Paratransit Operations

Immediate Positons Available / Paid Training / Benefit package Match of salary with experience! Flexible Shifts Available • Safety Bonus Incentives • Great Company Culture Apply in Person Monday through Friday • 9:00am to 3:00pm 4201 Tacony Street, Philadelphia, PA 19124 | 215-992-8000 Apply online:www.philly.totalbusco.com General Employment

General Employment

BLOOD DONORS All donors paid $40.00 No appointment necessary. Walk-ins welcome. Must be healthy and have proper I.D. Must provide Social Security card.Interstate Blood Bank 1250-52 N Broad St. Phila PA 19121 215-765-2554 Hrs. 7:00 AM - 3:30 PM NEW DONORS BRING THIS AD IN FOR A $10.00 BONUS

DRIVERS AllThree's Luxury Sedan & Taxicab looking for professional drivers. High income. Set your own hrs. Please call M-F. 10a-4p. 215-333-1111

Construction Workers All trades. Must be exp'd. & dependable. 484-507-3164

GENERAL AND TREATMENT FOSTER PARENTS NEEDED Open your heart and home to children of all ages New Foundations, Inc. 215-203-8733 www.nfi4kids.org

MERCHANDISE FOR SALE Flea Market

Indoor Antique & Vintage Market “Come Spend The Day Shopping On The River With Us”

At The Cherry Street Pier

SAT, MAY 18TH Market Hours: 8 am - 7 pm Bar Hours: 1 pm - 6 pm 121 N. Columbus Blvd. (At Race Street) Free Admission / ATM / Great Food and Dog Friendly Handicap Accessible 215-625-FLEA (3532) | www.PhilaFleaMarkets.org

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

DRIVERS/ LIMO - F/T Must be 27yrs. old & lic'd. Dave's Limousine, 5915 Harbison Ave. Looking for petite, slender & athletic females. Young & mature, ages 19-35 to work for great a dating service with great pay. Out call only. 24/7 work available. Drivers provided. (484) 773-3791 PAID RESEARCH SUBJECT SPACE MISSION SIMULATION 8 day study of resilience at U. of PA. Must be healthy, about 30-55 yr. old with STEM educ. MS or BS+ equiv. exp or military exp. Compensated time & travel. Call 215-573-5855

PAID RESEARCH SUBJECT SLEEP QUALITY STUDY 7-day study of cognitive performance at Univ. of Penn. Must be healthy, approx. 30-55 yrs. old, pref. with STEM educ. or military exp. Compensated time & travel CALL 215-573-5855 FLAGGERS ($12.50/hr) Traffic Plan seeks Flaggers to set up and direct traffic around construction sites. A valid PA driver license and clean driving record a must, good pay and benefits. If interested please fill out an application at 510 Hertzog Blvd, King of Prussia, PA on Monday’s 10am - 2pm or online at trafficplan.com. HOME IMPROVEMENT Windows

HAPPY WINDOWS

Shutters, 2-Inch Wood, Pleated Shades, Roman Shades, Drapes, Verticals, Mini-Blinds Discount Price With Installation

Call Eileen

215-465-7525

Legal Notices

Notice is hereby given that an application will be made to the Department of State of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, at Harrisburg, Pa., on or after 1/23/2019, for the purpose of obtaining a charter of a proposed nonprofit corporation to be organized under the 1988 Nonprofit Corporation Law of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, effective October 1, 1989 as amended. The name of the corporation is: PSOL SCHOOL. The purposes for which it is to be organized are: language education. Leonardo Ribeiro, Solicitor.

MISSING

REAL ESTATE

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

37

CHECK OUT A FEW OF THIS WEEKS SPECIAL PROPERTIES AND RENTALS GREAT RENTALS

417 SOUTH ST - FOR RENT. JOYTURE. TERRIFIC LOFT SPACE. 9000 SQ FT. CAN SUBDIVIDE ($14 A SQ FT) 817 S 3RD ST - 3RD & QUEEN. SPACIOUS & UNIQUE BI-LEVEL 1 BR W/ PRIVATE ENTRANCE & OUTDOOR SPACE. $1400

NEW LISTINGS

772 S. FRONT ST - LOVELY COURTYARD HOME. 2 BEDROOMS, 2 BATHS, HARDWOOD FLOORS T/O, LOTS OF WINDOWS & FULL BASEMENT. $349,900 240 MONROE ST - LOCATION! LOCATION! 1 BR PIED-A-TERRE & BEAUTIFUL COMMON GARDENS. $199,000 712 S 2ND ST – BRIGHT, SPACIOUS & DRAMATIC, 3/2.5, HWRD FLRS, DK & GARDEN + PARKING. $779,900 211 MANTON ST - PENNSPORT. 2 BEDROOMS + DEN + NICE OUTDOOR SPACE. $379,900 781 S 2ND ST - “THE CASTLE” DRAMATIC, UNIQUE AND SPECIAL + PARKING. $799,900 813 FITZWATER ST - LOCATION! LOCATION! BUILD YOUR DREAM HOME. A HUGE GARAGE. 20 X 80. $1,350,000 117 LOMBARD ST - A HISTORIC GEM! 4 BEDROOMS, 3.5 BATHS & INCREDIBLE GARDENS. $1,150,000 124-26 LOMBARD ST - GREAT DOUBLE PROPERTY + APARTMENTS. $1,700,000 1723 BAINBRIDGE ST - GRADUATE HOSPITAL. A SUPER DUPLEX. $699,900 854 S FRONT ST - GREAT NEW REHAB. 3/3, HARDWOOD FLOORS, GARDEN & DECK. $699,900 123 LEAGUE ST - CIRCA 1790. LOVELY 3 BEDROOMS, 1.5 BATHS, HUGE GARDEN. $419,000

What They Are Saying: “The listing and sale of my home went off without a hitch. I didn’t realize how special that was until I tried to buy a new home in another area. Thanks, Pat and Kathy!” Debbie R

Patrick Conway

Kathy Conway

215-266-1537 215-850-3842 Society Hill Office • 215.627.6005 • Please visit us online at www.conwayteam.com

Anne E. Koons

ACCREDITED LUXURY HOME SPECIALIST Licensed in NJ & PA

The #1 Agent of the Cherry Hill Home Marketing Center 2018, 2017, 2016, 2014, 2013 & 2012 NJAR Circle of Excellence PLATINUM Award 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2012,GOLD 2014, 2013

Direct 856-795-4709 office 856-428-8000 ext. 142

New Price

New Listing

Merchantville Beautiful 3 Story Grand Victorian has 8 Bedrooms, 3.5 f baths located in the heart of town. The first floor has 12 ft ceilings, formal living room w/fireplace, parlor, dining rm, family rm & kitchen, crown molding, hardwood floors, gorgeous wood staircase and banisters with a cover front porch .This home has an updated heating system, full unfinished basement, a 2 car detached garage on almost an acre of property. Property is being sold in as is condition. $305,000.

Marlton/Mayfair At Evesham Beautiful, well maintained 4 bedroom, 2.5 baths, 2 car garage w/finished basement located in a great neighborhood. The Kitchen has hardwood floors, granite counter-tops, newer stainless steal appliances & patio doors to large stamped concrete patio. The master bedroom suite has been freshly painted with a large WIC. This home is a must see & In Move In Condition. $422,000.

Moorestown An amazing, truly unique 4 bedroom, 5 ½ bath home with gourmet kitchen, full finished walk out basement, 2 car garage w/home theater on 2nd level, a tennisbasketball court, built-in pool w/slide, hot-tub & waterfalls and a covered outdoor kitchen & bar which is nestled on a resort like professionally landscaped 2 acre property. $1,449,900

Cherry Hill/ Europa Designer touches abound in this stunning open floor plan rancher, 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom, with 2 addition-al large bedroom size rooms downstairs in finished basement, one attached to full bathroom, other adjoining family room. Rare to find rancher, very desirable neighborhood in heart of Cherry Hill. $414,900

Cherry Hill/ Wilderness Run Beautifully updated 4 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, 3 car garage home that flows seamlessly from one room to the next, it's elegant, bright and spacious. Designer kitchen, with professional appliances. The master bedroom suite has a wonder-fully updated bath w/a free standing tub, glass enclosed shower w/decorative tiles, floating double vanities with marble tops and make up area, there are 3 walk in closets and patio doors to a private balcony. $670,000.

Cherry Hill/ Short Hills This magnificent Coventry Model has an open floor plan, 4 bedrooms, 4.5 Baths, 3 car garage, 1st floor office, double staircases, full finished basement. The custom eat in kitchen has center island with breakfast bar, and extra windows allowing plenty of light. Large custom backyard with paver patio & fire pit. $699,900.

Cherry Hill/ Short Hills 4 Bedroom ,3.5 Bath with finished basement, master bedroom suite with sitting room, first floor office, 2 car garage situated on a cult-de-sac located in the desirable neighborhood of Short Hills. Hardwood floors can be found in the foyer and flow through the living rm, dining rm and kitchen. The family room has over sized windows, gas fireplace. The home is freshly painted w/newer carpet and an open floor plan $559,900.

New Price Medford Twp./Taunton Lakes A truly unique custom built home located on Tauton Lake with 4 Bedrooms, 4 full baths, indoor pool, formal living & dining room, huge custom kitchen, sunroom, walk out basement, private office, 2 car garage is located on pristine grounds. $795,000

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO STEVEN, NICOLE & JOSH………...

Now more than ever, EXPERIENCE counts, that is why you need to call our AUNT ANNE, because she has the

EXPERIENCE, COMMITMENT, PASSION & KNOWLEDGE to help you in selling or buying a home.

CALL OUR AUNT ANNE TODAY FOR ALL OF YOUR REAL ESTATE NEEDS 856 -795-4709

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

38

REAL ESTATE

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY Queen Village Enjoy every modern convenience in the heart of Queen Village. This 4 BR plus den, 3.2 baths home features a spacious living room with a gas fireplace and beautiful details including ornate woodwork, with hardwood floors throughout. This home offers several private outdoor spaces, including the spacious landscaped garden and three decks. And there’s a 2-car garage!

$1,199,000

Art Museum Area This very spacious 1 bedroom condo features hardwood floors, an easy and convenient galley kitchen, spacious foyer entry, loads of closets, and a light and airy living dining room combo that is a very flexible multi-use space. This art deco building is wheelchair accessible and stair free. There’s a parking spot in the garage for rent.

New Price - Fishtown Welcome yourself home and find an open concept floor plan including a comfortable and expansive living area, formal dining area, chef’s kitchen with induction stove and radiant heat floor, and then laundry and powder room before the giant outdoor living area. There are 5 years left on the tax abatement. 3 Bedrooms | 2.5 Baths

$345,000

Pennsport This fabulous 2 bedrooms, 1 bath home features exposed brick interior walls, beautiful hardwood flooring, a unique spiral staircase, and central air. Updated kitchen and bath. Access the private rear yard from the kitchen.

$299,900

$184,900

New Price - Kensington

New Listing - Fairmount This well maintained 3 bedroom, 1 bath home boasts lots of original charm. Enter into the open living room and dining area with light oak floors throughout and a lovely mantel offering a hint of style and character. Off the dining room is the modern kitchen with granite counterts and stainless steel appliances as well as the entrance to your private patio.

$359,000

MAIN LINE SUBURBS

CENTER CITY PHILA.

WILLIAM PENN HOUSE 1919 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia Unit #1820 2 BED | 1 BATH | 1,134 SQ FT | $549,000 Unit #923/924 3 BED | 2 BATH | 1,581 SQ FT | $539,000 Unit #2920 2 BED | 1 BATH | 1,134 SQ FT | $415,000

717 CONSHOHOCKEN STATE ROAD, PENN VALLEY

1814 LUDLOW STREET, PHILADELPHIA

Unit #1310 1 BED | 1 BATH | 825 SQ FT | $320,000

6 BED, 6.1 BATH | 6,508 SQ FT | $1,950,000

INVESTMENT | 3,150 SQ FT | $1,395,000

Unit #2022 | 1 BED | 1 BATH | 867 SQ FT | $310,000

1030 E Lancaster Avenue, Unit #304, Bryn Mawr Unit #510 1 BED | 1 BATH | 825 SQ FT | $310,000

MAIN LINE SUBURBS

LISTINGS

NEW LISTINGS

1211 Mirabeau Ln, Gladwyne

1 BED | 1 BATH | 700 SQ FT | $128,000

6 BED | 8.3 BATH | 15,317 SQ FT | $3,950,000

1655 Oakwood Drive, Unit#N103, Penn Valley

533 N. Spring Mill Road, Villanova 5 BED | 4.1 BATH | 4,716 SQ FT | $1,375,000

106 Airdale Road, Bryn Mawr

1320 Monk Rd, Gladwyne

1 BED | 1 BATH | 858 SQ FT | $145,000

8 BED, 4.1 BATH | 6,200 SQ FT | $995,000

6 BED | 8.2 BATH | 9,923 SQ FT | $3,850,000

517 Righters Mill Road, Penn Valley

2000 Valley Forge Cir, Unit#36, King of Prussia

1351 Bobarn Drive, Penn Valley

STORAGE UNIT | $12,000

4 BED | 2.1 BATH | 3,818 SQ FT | $989,000

39 Aberdale Rd, Bala Cynwyd, PA 19004

5 BED | 4.1 BATH | 6,647 SQ FT | $1,149,000

7 BED | 3.2 BATH | 2,818 SQ FT | $785,000

34 Sandringham Rd, Bala Cynwyd

CENTER CITY

1315 Bobarn Drive, Penn Valley

5 BED | 5.3 BATH | 5,217 SQ FT | $1,095,000

NEW LISTINGS

4 BED | 3.1 BATH | 3,422 SQ FT | $775,000

190 Presidential Blvd, #415, Bala Cynwyd

1310 Pine Road, Bryn Mawr

2 BED, 2.1 BATH | 1,970 SQ FT | $639,000

5 BED | 3.1 BATH | 3,655 SQ FT | $995,000

200 W. Elm Street, #1420, Conshohocken

1417 Centennial Rd, Penn Valley

2 BED | 2 BATH | 1,318 SQ FT | $325,000

700 Ardmore Ave, #112, Ardmore 2 BED | 2.1 BATH | 1,152 SQ FT | $239,000

JUST REDUCED

5 BED | 3.1 BATH | 4,371 SQ FT | $899,000

Unit #1311 STUDIO | 1 BATH | 462 SQ FT | $210,000

THE KENNEDY HOUSE 1901 JFK Blvd, Philadelphia

Unit #1213 1 BED | 1 BATH | 872 SQ FT | $289,000

Unit #1512 STUDIO | 1 BATH | 475 SQ FT | $200,000

410 Shurs Ln, #A308, Philadelphia Unit#2911 STUDIO | 1 BATH | 522 SQ FT | $184,900

1205 Chermar Ln, Penn Valley

1 BED | 1.1 BATH | 1,260 SQ FT | $279,000

Unit#2816 STUDIO | 1 BATH | 517 SQ FT | $175,000

5 BED | 4.1 BATH | 3,356 SQ FT | $849,000

JUST REDUCED

Unit#710 STUDIO | 1 BATH | 475 SQ FT | $150,000

239 Trianon Ln, Villanova

710 Lombard Street, Philadelphia

4 BED | 3.1 BATH | 3,443 SQ FT | $839,000

2 BED | 2.1 BATH | 1890 SQ FT | $919,990

KINGSLEY COURT

1124 Youngsford Rd, Gladwyne

200 S Narberth Ave, Narberth

LISTINGS

501 Kingsley Court 3 BED | 3.2 BATH | $495,000

5 BED | 4.3 BATH | 6,144 SQ FT | $1,449,000

200 Price Ave, Unit#4, Narbeth

MULTI-FAMILY | $749,000

3 BED | 3.1 BATH | 3,038 SQ FT | $799,000

207 Lindy Ln, Bala Cynwyd 3 BED | 4.1 BATH | 4,217 SQ FT | $604,900

CONDO LIVING

191 Presidential Boulevard, #824-25, Bala Cynwyd

1750 Oakwood Ter, Unit#1A, Penn Valley

2 BED | 2 BATH | 2,100 SQ FT | $325,000

2 BED | 2 BATH | 1,299 SQ FT | $227,000

MAY 16 - 23, 2019 | PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY

Philadelphia 5860 Woodbine Ave, Philadelphia 500 Kingsley Court 3 BED | 2 BATH | 2,000 SQ FT | $487,000 502 Kingsley Court 3 BED | 3.1 BATH | 2,000 SQ FT | $485,000 6 BED | 4.1 BATH | 3,725 SQ FT | $689,000 503 Kingsley Court 4 BED | 3.1 BATH | 2,400 SQ FT | $483,500 2401 Pennsylvania Ave, #17B28, Philadelphia 504 Kingsley Court 4 BED | 3.1 BATH | 2,000 SQ FT | $480,000 1 BED | 1 BATH | 1,258 SQ FT | $299,000

PW REAL ESTATE To advertise in this section contact

Unit 2006 2 BED | 2 BATH | 1,171 SQ FT | $485,000

4 BED | 4.3 BATH | 6,465 SQ FT | $2,990,000

1309 Summer Hill Lane, Gladwyne

$242,900

Unit #2521/2 3 BED | 3 BATH | 1,906 SQ FT | $950,000

1814 Ludlow Street, Philadelphia Unit#1919 1 BED | 1 BATH | 606 SQ FT | $219,000 INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY | 3,150 SQ FT | $1,395,000 Unit#1819 1 BED | 1 BATH | 606 SQ FT | $249,000 809 Latona Street, Philadelphia 3 BED | 1 BATH | 1,288 SQ FT | $349,000

Nestled in the quaint back nook of this Waterloo Street block stands the deep rosy-red painted brick facade of this 2 BR, 1.5 BA home. The high functioning kitchen space shines with LED lighting, stainless steel appliances, an expansive granite center island, and lots of storage space. Enjoy gardening in raised beds in the private back patio framed by custom built wooden fencing and more of that lovely red brick!

506 Kingsley Court 4 BED | 3.1 BATH | 2,000 SQ FT | $480,000

Dan Tangi 215-543-3743 ext. 111 or dtangi@philadelphiaweekly.com

REAL ESTATE

PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM @PHILLYWEEKLY

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Go Solo. Are you tired of the shell game played by those super-sized real estate brokers? Go Solo. Are you tired SIENAPLACE.COM Solo Real Estate is a family-owned real estate SALES@SIENAPLACE.COM of firm thespecializing shell game played by Naval Square: $529,000 Graduate Hospital: $675,000 Bella Vista: $619,000 in Center City Philadelphia Totally renovated Townhouse. Strickland Crt Condo feats Great curb appeal! 4 BR Townand its neighborhoods that makes sure our those super-sized real estate MODEL HOMES OPEN New hrdwd flrs. Quartz kitchen. hrdwd flrs & open flr house feats LR w/bay window, DR clients don’t ever crack under pressure. w/blt-ins & fplc. Kitchen w/patio. Fplc. 2 BR, 2 luxurious bths. Paplan. Granite island kit. Mon, Thurs thru Sat 11-5 | Sun 12-5 brokers? Solo Real Estate is 2nd flr lndry. 2 Baths. Roof deck. tio, roof deck. 1-Car blt-in garage. 2BR, 2bth. 1-Car deeded prkg. a family-owned real estate Call us at 215-564-7656 For information: 2300 Hartranft Street, Philadelphia, PA 19145 YOUR KEY TO or visit solorealty.com. Go Solo. Are you tired of the shell game Between Penrose Ave. and 26th St. firm specializing in Center 610-667-6655 2017 Chancellor Street Philadelphia, PA 19103 played by thoseand super-sized real estate brokers? QUALITY SERVICE DuffyRealEstate.com City Philadelphia its Solo Real Estate is a family-owned real estate neighborhoods that makes firm specializing in Center City Philadelphia sure our clients don’t ever The National—Gated Community In Olde City! SOLO_Ads_Color_05.12.14.indd 5/13/14 10:24 AM and its13 neighborhoods that makes sure our crackclients underdon’t pressure. Please Join Us for an Open House ever crack under pressure.

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Call us at 215-564-7656 or visit solorealty.com. 2017 Chancellor Street Philadelphia, PA 19103

Call us at 215-564-7656 or visit solorealty.com 2017 Chancellor Street SOLO_Ads_Color_05.12.14.indd 13 19103 Philadelphia, PA Anne E. Koons The #1 Agent of the Cherry Hill Home Marketing Center 2018, 2017, 2016, 2014, 2013 & 2012 NJAR Circle of Excellence PLATINUM Award 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2012,GOLD 2014, 2013 Direct 856-795-4709 office 856-428-8000 ext. 142 Website: www.annekoonsrealestate.com Akoonsbhhs@gmail.com

Cherry Hill/Villagio Stunning 3 Bedroom, 3 bath, 1st floor Master Bedroom Suite, large eat in Kitchen with a 2-car garage located in the quiet 55+ community of Villagio. This home has HW floors, office, formal living and dining rm, family rm and has been meticulously maintained. $579,000

ACCREDITED LUXURY HOME SPECIALIST Licensed in NJ & PA

Voorhees/ Sturbridge Estates Expanded Danbury model w/ 4bd, 3.5 baths, 3 car garage located on 1/2 acre on wooded splendor. 1st floor office, sunroom, newer roof, newer HVAC, newer Mstr bath, newer appliances & a full unfinished basement .Hardwood floors thru out first floor & newer carpet upstairs. $744,900

PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY | MAY 16 - 23, 2019

Thursday, May 16, 2019 :: 5pm�6:30pm Residence #1k3 2 Bed, 2.5 Bath, 1546sf New Price: $479,000 INCLUDES 1 PARKING SPACE! Freshly Painted!

Meet agent at 130 N 2nd St Gate: Margie Wilde : 215.888.8500

Bryant & Wilde Realty, LLC

Ask about our Other Available Listings for Rent & Sale!

210 W. Rittenhouse Sq.  Suite 405  Phila., PA 19103 Www.BryantWildeRealty.com  sales@bryantwilderealty.com  Fax: 215.644.8826  Office: 215.893.6100

5/13/14 10:24 AM

Diane Bryant: 610.529.8000  Margie Wilde : 215.888.8500

PROPS TO OUR PARTNERS PW loves to work with great brands across Philly. Want to hook up? Drop us a line at drops@philadelphiaweekly.com

39

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