
11 minute read
Film
from Nov. 12, 2015
Not shaken, not stirred
Spectre
Advertisement
The Daniel Craig-led James Bond movies have been a little brainier than past efforts. They’ve also been the best of the Bond films. With Craig, the franchise has dared to let a little thing called genuine emotions into the mix. The series peaked with 2012’s Skyfall, directed by Sam Mendes and featuring Javier Bardem as a classic Bond villain. For the latest installment, Mendes returns, and this time out the action gets amped up. Spectre has some terrific set pieces, including a dizzying helicopter sequence to open things up and a nasty fight on a train. That’s what’s good about the movie. What’s bad? Actually, a good chunk of it is bad. After the full experience that was Skyfall, Spectre feels incomplete and shallow. During a layover in Italy—this one hops around a confusing amount—Bond finds out a few hard truths about his origins, and discovers that much of the pain he’s gone through in his last few chapters is attributable to one man. Christoph Waltz shows up (barely) as Oberhauser, a past acquaintance of Bond now leading a dark society called Spectre, responsible for terrorist attacks worldwide. Of course, Bond will get a girl along the way. This time out it’s Madeleine Swann, played by Lea Seydoux of Blue is the Warmest Color. Not only does she fall for Bond, she falls for Bond in a way that kind of makes her look like an idiot. Throughout the film, there’s a pervading feeling that Craig is getting a little tired of the Bond shtick. He just doesn’t seem fully committed at this point.
Also, and this is a rather strange observation but I’m going to just put it out there, he looks totally gross when he’s kissing women in this movie. I’m going to go ahead and call him the worst Bond kisser ever. (Yes, even worse than Roger Moore!) He looks like he’s out to eat somebody’s face in this film, like they smeared the actresses’ faces by Bob Grimm with peanut butter before calling “Action!” Seydoux probably had to check for her bgrimm@ lower lip after takes. newsreview.com Waltz is fun in his few scenes, but saying his villain is underdeveloped would be an 2 understatement. He barely gets a chance to register in the movie. Ralph Fiennes returns as M, and his portion of the story, where Secret Intelligence Service is in danger of being shut down, is actually interesting. It’s a bad thing when the subplot is more interesting than what Bond is doing. At 148 minutes long, with a price tag in the $250 million range, we’re looking at a major case of bloat with Spectre. For all of that money they had, couldn’t the art department come up with a better-looking staged photo of Bond’s youth? This movie has one of those photos where young pictures of the actual actors are Photoshopped together to make it look like their characters coexisted in a past moment. The staged photo looks like somebody used scissors and Scotch tape. No complaints about the action sequences. Dave Bautista shows up as a Spectre goon named Hinx, and he’s the one who dukes it out with Bond on the train. He makes for a good Bond monster. The beginning sequence, in addition to the excellent helicopter sequence, includes a building collapse where Bond narrowly escapes being crushed. It’s good stuff. The emotional stuff is what drags the movie down. Yes, it was welcomed in Skyfall, but this film feels like tries too hard. There are certain things we don’t need to know about James Bond and his past. The past the film paints is a completely unnecessary one. Craig is contracted for one more picture, but something feels awfully final about Spectre. If he should return for another go, somebody behind the camera or typing the screenplay better find a way for Bond to have fun again, because Spectre is a drag. Ω
"They couldn't have gotten George Lazenby for this one?"
1
Poor
2
Fair
3
Good
4

Very Good 5
2Bridge of Spies Steven Spielberg continues a mini slump with his second good-looking yet terminally boring historical drama in a row after Lincoln. This is Spielberg’s fourth collaboration with Tom Hanks, and their first since 2004’s terrible The Terminal. It doesn’t represent a return to Catch Me if You Can and Saving Private Ryan glory. This film certainly had a lot going f or it. Not only is it Spielberg’s take on spying during the 1960s Cold War, which sounds like it should be exciting, but it’s also a collaboration with the Coen Brothers. Joel and Ethan chipped in on the screenplay, which usually means good things are afoot. I wish Joel and Ethan had directed it, too. Hanks plays James B. Donovan, a U.S. tax attorney who lands the unenviable task of representing recently captured alleged Russian spy Rudolf Abel (Mark Rylance). While Donovan’s law firm and the courts see the whole thing as an open-and-shut case, Donovan makes it known that his intentions are to represent Abel to the full extent of the law. In a parallel story, some pilots join the CIA in a new spying program with U-2 planes. One of those planes getting shot out of the sky at 70,000 feet gives the Russians their own spy prisoner in Francis Gary Powers (Austin Stowell). With the construction of the Berlin Wall, yet another “spy” is captured when Frederic Pryor (Will Rogers), an American student who picked a crappy time to study in West Berlin, is apprehended by the East Germans. It all adds up to a rather boring time at the movies despite a typically strong Hanks performance.
2Burnt There’s no doubt that Bradley Cooper goes all-in performance wise for Burnt in which he plays a chef psychotically determined to get his third Michelin star. Too bad it’s in service of a character that’s hard to root for when we the audience are supposed to be doing so. In actuality, his character is a totally unlikeable prick. After going sober for over two years and shucking a million oysters as penance for his previous bad behavior, Adam Jones (Cooper) heads to Paris, intent upon regaining his status as a legendary chef and attaining that hallowed “third star” status. He starts his quest by terrorizing restaurant owner Tony (Daniel Bruhl), a former friend turned enemy who had a crush on him but now hates him. Jones sets up a scenario with a food critic (Uma Thurman) that would probably get most people arrested for fraud, but in the movies it gets him control of a kitchen. Sienna Miller, Cooper’s costar in American Sniper, shows up as a cook Jones intimidates into working for him. Of course, they fall in love, for this is a clichéd piece-of-crap movie. It’s hard to see an actor like Cooper laboring in a film that simply doesn’t back him up. This sucker is a gas stove with no gas.
2I Smile Back Sarah Silverman gives an impressive dramatic performance in a movie offering up dime store psychology in this clumsy effort from director Adam Salky. Silverman is Laney, a troubled housewife married to successful insurance man Bruce (Josh Charles, supremely awesome in this year’s Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp). She has it all, but some daddy issues have left her an emotional wreck, guzzling wine, snorting drugs in the bathroom, and screwing strangers in basements. Things get even worse when she decides to quit taking her lithium. Salky’s directorial style is, at best, flat, which doesn’t serve the sincere effort by Silverman. The comedic actress shows she can easily handle the heavy stuff, but Laney’s story is well worn and not interesting. The mistake is in trying to explain her behavior based on her past. Sometimes, things are better left for the audience to figure out. The clichés are bountiful in this one, and they wind up stranding Silverman in a wasteful movie. (Available for rent on iTunes, Amazon.com and On Demand during a limited theatrical release.)
4The Martian Ridley Scott’s latest is a fun and funny movie that represents lighter fare for the often dark director. Yes, it’s about some poor sap getting stranded on Mars but, no, aliens don’t burst from his belly after breakfast. Matt Damon spends a lot of time onscreen by himself as Mark Watney, a botanist on a mission to Mars who becomes the unfortunate recipient of a satellite dish to the gut during a storm, a violent squall that mandates the evacuation of his crew. After an attempt by his commander (Jessica Chastain) to retrieve him, the crew bugs out thinking Watney has bought the farm. (Yep … that’s a botanist pun I just dropped right there.) Watney awakens to find himself alone on the red planet with a piece of metal stuck in his gut. After another Ridley Scott directed self-surgery scene—reminiscent of that yucky self-surgery scene in Scott’s Prometheus—Watney commences survival mode. The film has fun with science facts involving things like the creation of fertilizer, the surprising need and effectiveness for duct tape and tarps on Mars, and trying to make fire out of mostly fire-retardant materials. Scott and his writers present these overtly nerdy aspects of the movie with great humor and the right amount of intelligence without making things too complicated.
3Miss You Already Catherine Hardwicke (Thirteen) directs Toni Collette and Drew Barrymore in an illness-of-the-week movie that rises above the formula thanks to great work by the two stars and the men playing their husbands. Milly (Collette) and Jess (Barrymore) are lifelong friends, having shared many experiences together. Milly marries a rocker husband (Dominic Cooper), and Jess couples up with a blue-collar worker (Paddy Considine), both looking to start families. Milly has two kids, while Jess tries hard to have a baby. She finally gets pregnant, but it’s at the same time that Milly is diagnosed with breast cancer. Hardwicke and friends do a good job showing the hardships Milly faces, including chemotherapy and emotional difficulties. The proceedings feel “real” and not cloying, thanks in large part to a screenplay that isn’t afraid to show human frailties and flaws. Collette gets the showier role here, and she further displays why she is one of the more underrated actresses out there. Barrymore gives what may be her best performance yet as the best friend who won’t take shit from her pal, even if she does have cancer. Cooper and Considine deliver with dark humor and male characters that are refreshingly honest and goofy. I’d say it’s a Beaches for the new millennium, but that would be an insult. This movie is actually good.
3The Peanuts Movie The spirit of Charles M. Schulz is ever present in this sweet, fun update of the popular comic strip that birthed some pretty cool TV specials when I was a pup. The look of the film, especially in its 3-D format, reminds me of the View-Master toy I had when I was a kid. The plot is a simple one, with Charlie Brown trying to get the attention of the Little Red-Haired Girl while his dog Snoopy fantasizes about battling his enemy, the Red Baron. Director Steve Martino captures the adorable essence of Peanuts, remaining faithful to its origins and ignoring temptations to modernize it. He’s also done a nice job of assembling the voice cast, with all of the characters sounding much like they did decades ago. (One exception: Peppermint Patty sounds way different.) The soundtrack often pays tribute to the iconic piano sounds of Vince Guaraldi, and they even get the classic Peanuts dance moves down. I watched this with a sea of kids, and they ate it up, so I imagine more will be on the way. Good to see Chuck and Snoopy getting the big screen adaptation worthy of them.
5Steve Jobs This innovative biopic, written by Aaron Sorkin and directed by the ever-reliable Danny Boyle (127 Hours, Sunshine), plays out in three parts. Apart from a few flashbacks, we see Steve Jobs (an amazing Michael Fassbender) backstage at three product launches during his career. The film is expertly staged, playing out like the most entertaining and brutal Shakespearean drama. As Jobs ties his bowtie and prepares to launch the Macintosh in 1984, his personal life is messing with his mojo. We see Jobs at his very worst, a man so obsessed with the new gadgets his companies come up with that he wouldn’t face the reality of his fatherly duties. Lisa, portrayed at different ages by Moss (6), Ripley Sobo (9) and a show-stopping Perla Haney-Jardine (19) is a girl any dad would be proud of, but Jobs can’t really be bothered. He has a couple of goofylooking computers to sell. Fassbender delivers a performance for the ages as the man who gave us that phone thing you are so damned in love with. Boyle makes another great movie to add to his pile, a film that somehow makes hanging out backstage with Steve Jobs exhilarating. Undoubtedly one of the year’s best films, and Fassbender is most certainly an Oscar contender.